WEBVTT - GECKMAIL: “A GUY ON XBOX LIVE STOLE MY GF” 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:05.440 Hello, Welcome to get mail. It is a thing where 0:00:05.519 --> 0:00:09.400 I read mail as a gecko, and I am assuming 0:00:09.400 --> 0:00:13.440 that if you're listening to this show that you know 0:00:13.840 --> 0:00:18.080 who I am, or if you don't, that's okay, I'll 0:00:18.120 --> 0:00:23.800 fill you in. I'm a guy, and we have one 0:00:23.800 --> 0:00:25.759 thing in common if you're listening to this, is that 0:00:25.800 --> 0:00:30.200 we're both not dead. How amazing is that? How amazing 0:00:30.240 --> 0:00:32.760 is it that we're both not dead? You know? I mean, 0:00:32.840 --> 0:00:35.560 I what's this? Hold on? Let me google this real quick? 0:00:35.640 --> 0:00:47.279 How many of the people who ever lived are dead? Okay? Okay, 0:00:47.360 --> 0:00:50.879 so if we add the number? Okay, all right, look, 0:00:50.920 --> 0:00:53.040 I gotta I got it right here. Okay, ninety four 0:00:53.159 --> 0:00:59.120 percent of all people who have ever lived are dead. 0:00:59.680 --> 0:01:06.680 This is from Google, which is uh, you know, is smart. Uh. 0:01:06.800 --> 0:01:09.840 And that means that for every one person alive today, 0:01:10.440 --> 0:01:15.319 there are fourteen people who are dead. Not saying that 0:01:15.319 --> 0:01:18.120 that one person killed those fourteen people, but just as 0:01:18.120 --> 0:01:22.679 a statistic, So, I mean, there's basically that means that 0:01:22.720 --> 0:01:26.680 there's a what's six to over ten? How do we okay, 0:01:26.680 --> 0:01:30.160 what's one hundred divided by six? I'm trying to simplify 0:01:30.160 --> 0:01:33.839 this fraction. There's like a Okay, wait whatever, there's something 0:01:33.880 --> 0:01:38.880 like a one in sixteen chance that you're you're that 0:01:38.920 --> 0:01:42.319 you're alive, and you're alive. You're part of the six percent. 0:01:42.400 --> 0:01:47.400 You're part of the lucky six percent of folks that 0:01:47.440 --> 0:01:51.760 are that are still got some time. Ninety four percent 0:01:51.800 --> 0:01:56.000 of all people have no time, and they're dead forever. 0:01:56.200 --> 0:01:58.920 They're never coming back. If you die, if you were 0:01:58.960 --> 0:02:05.880 like a guy or a girl in the year seventeen 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:07.960 not even seventeen hundred. Let's go back further, if you 0:02:08.000 --> 0:02:12.840 were a guy or a girl in the year thirteen hundred, 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:15.160 if you were a guy and the girl a million 0:02:15.240 --> 0:02:17.400 years ago. I don't know when humans came into being, 0:02:18.440 --> 0:02:23.560 but whatever, some people they died like three thousand years 0:02:23.560 --> 0:02:26.440 ago and that was it. And we ain't heard a 0:02:26.639 --> 0:02:30.520 sound from those people in three thousand years. And I 0:02:30.520 --> 0:02:32.720 wouldn't hold out a hope because the people that died 0:02:32.760 --> 0:02:36.640 three thousand years ago, they're not coming back. They were alive. 0:02:37.320 --> 0:02:39.560 The amount of time that they were alive compared to 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:43.320 the amount of time that they'll be dead is so minischool. 0:02:43.560 --> 0:02:45.720 And in this very moment that you're listening to this 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:49.720 fucking podcast, you're part of the you're living the tiny 0:02:50.600 --> 0:02:55.040 little speck of existence that you're ever gonna live, and 0:02:55.080 --> 0:02:59.320 then you're gonna be dead forever. And I don't know 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:05.560 that's cool. Welcome to gek mail. My name is Lyle, 0:03:05.600 --> 0:03:10.280 and I'm gonna read male from people who have emailed me. 0:03:12.160 --> 0:03:15.200 I cannot read male from people who have not emailed 0:03:15.200 --> 0:03:19.800 me because there's no male to read. So let's do 0:03:19.919 --> 0:03:22.320 this and then and we also exist at the same 0:03:22.360 --> 0:03:25.480 time as one another, which is kind of insane when 0:03:25.480 --> 0:03:28.560 you think about it. We're the six percent. We're all 0:03:28.639 --> 0:03:34.760 the six percent. We're all the six percent. All right, 0:03:36.760 --> 0:03:40.600 how do they know that? Demo demographers estimate that around 0:03:40.640 --> 0:03:43.440 one hundred and seventeen billion people have ever lived on Earth. 0:03:44.600 --> 0:03:48.440 This number is calculated by making assumptions about population size 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:51.640 throughout history and applying birth rates to each pyramid period. 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:55.880 That's fucking stupid. All right, let's keep going. Let's or 0:03:55.960 --> 0:03:58.080 I guess let's start all right. This is from Louis 0:03:58.600 --> 0:04:08.080 subject line horn a controversial opinion. All right, Hello, I 0:04:08.080 --> 0:04:11.320 would like to remain anonymous. Please, I'm writing to you 0:04:11.560 --> 0:04:13.680 hoping that you can give me a second opinion on 0:04:13.720 --> 0:04:16.719 this matter that has been weighing heavily on my relationship 0:04:16.760 --> 0:04:20.480 with my boyfriend lately. I am especially curious about your opinion, 0:04:20.600 --> 0:04:23.680 as you are a man and have openly said on 0:04:23.839 --> 0:04:28.279 the show that you do indulge in watching porn as well. 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:31.960 I really got to remember that people actually listen to 0:04:32.000 --> 0:04:35.520 this podcast, so that when I say things people can 0:04:35.640 --> 0:04:37.960 hear them. I gotta, I gotta keep that in mind. 0:04:38.000 --> 0:04:40.279 But I mean, yeah, I watch I watch porn. Sure, 0:04:40.760 --> 0:04:43.240 I'm trying to watch it less I'm trying to watch 0:04:43.240 --> 0:04:46.000 I don't. I actively. It's kind of like how people 0:04:46.040 --> 0:04:47.800 will hit me up and be like, hey, I want 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:50.640 your opinion on this weed thing, because you smoke weed 0:04:50.680 --> 0:04:53.160 every day, and I'm like, look, I have I do 0:04:53.200 --> 0:04:54.880 these things, but I don't like it, and the perfect 0:04:55.000 --> 0:04:55.800 version of my life. 0:04:55.839 --> 0:04:56.080 I don't. 0:04:56.160 --> 0:04:58.480 I don't watch porn. But anyway, okay, all right. My 0:04:58.600 --> 0:05:03.599 controversial opinion is that porn is that porn is cheating. 0:05:04.680 --> 0:05:08.520 I have a few different points to make here. The 0:05:08.680 --> 0:05:11.800 argument my boyfriend made is that it does not count 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:16.080 because it's not real. It's just a video okay, that 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:19.240 is in fact a real woman. Why are these women 0:05:19.480 --> 0:05:22.800 in the porn industry seen as objects? And not real women. 0:05:23.160 --> 0:05:25.919 For perspective, if the woman was in the room with 0:05:26.040 --> 0:05:29.040 him and he was simply watching her and getting off 0:05:29.040 --> 0:05:32.080 to it, would that be considered cheating? Why is it 0:05:32.120 --> 0:05:34.880 different because it's a video. What if a woman sent 0:05:35.000 --> 0:05:37.760 him a video of herself and he used this to 0:05:37.800 --> 0:05:40.480 get off would that be considered okay because it is 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:45.080 a video and quote not real. Secondly, he asked me, well, 0:05:45.080 --> 0:05:48.080 wouldn't you rather me watch porn than cheat on you? 0:05:48.200 --> 0:05:51.360 That's a stupid thing to say. This was a huge 0:05:51.640 --> 0:05:55.000 issue for me. This makes me feel like I am 0:05:55.040 --> 0:05:58.839 being given an ultimatum. Let my boyfriend jack off to 0:05:58.920 --> 0:06:02.920 other women or get cheated on. Cool. I've surfed read 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:04.720 it quite a bit on the topic, just to get 0:06:04.800 --> 0:06:08.960 some outside opinion, and a lot of men have this standpoint. 0:06:09.200 --> 0:06:12.080 Why should women have to fear being cheated on because 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:14.800 they do not feel comfortable allowing their significant other to 0:06:14.839 --> 0:06:20.640 watch porn? Lastly, and most importantly, porn desensitizes the brain. 0:06:21.080 --> 0:06:25.280 There are all caps many studies on this. If you 0:06:25.320 --> 0:06:28.560 are allowing yourself to look at other women lustfully and 0:06:28.680 --> 0:06:33.880 satisfy your sexual needs, where is the line the intimacy 0:06:33.920 --> 0:06:36.839 of sex is lost? Before I get a bunch of 0:06:36.880 --> 0:06:40.320 hate for being insecure or possessive. Let me just say 0:06:40.360 --> 0:06:43.440 that everyone has their own boundaries and preferences, and this 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:46.040 is just my own. I do not feel comfortable with it. 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:48.280 I love my boyfriend, but if it continues to be 0:06:48.320 --> 0:06:50.680 an issue, I have no problem breaking off the relationship 0:06:50.880 --> 0:06:53.440 and finding someone who has similar morals and will respect 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:55.800 my boundaries. I could go on and on here, but 0:06:55.839 --> 0:06:58.000 I am really trying to keep this short and sweet. 0:06:58.040 --> 0:07:02.839 Thanks in advance to really enjoy the show. Much love. Okay, 0:07:02.880 --> 0:07:05.719 first of all, look, I mean look, I mean, look, 0:07:05.880 --> 0:07:07.919 you don't even tell you this because you said it yourself. 0:07:08.560 --> 0:07:08.680 Uh. 0:07:09.360 --> 0:07:12.040 Look, it's a free country, it's a you're a free 0:07:12.120 --> 0:07:15.760 human being. You're you're if if if you don't want 0:07:15.880 --> 0:07:19.600 your significant other to watch porn, if that's the the 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:23.880 fucking u fence you're putting up, I mean, god damn, 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:26.920 Like you know you have the whether or not it's 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:30.640 insecure or possessive. Is I you know, I'm less in 0:07:31.040 --> 0:07:33.400 It doesn't really matter, like you can if that's what 0:07:33.480 --> 0:07:37.360 you want, If that's the boundary you want to set, 0:07:37.520 --> 0:07:43.440 then God bless you the whole thing of I I 0:07:43.480 --> 0:07:47.080 do I do think saying would you rather I would 0:07:47.160 --> 0:07:49.200 rather watch? Would you rather be? Watch porn? Or cheat 0:07:49.240 --> 0:07:51.240 on you? It's kind of stupid, like those are the 0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:57.160 two options. But I mean, look, man, it's pretty easy. 0:07:57.200 --> 0:07:59.920 It's like, look, if you don't like your boyfriend watching porn, 0:08:00.280 --> 0:08:02.679 and your boyfriend don't watch stop, want to stop watching porn? 0:08:04.200 --> 0:08:08.400 Fucking go go go go find a go to Utah. 0:08:08.520 --> 0:08:15.200 All right, find a nice Mormon gentleman, and uh, you know, 0:08:15.640 --> 0:08:18.120 tell him that if he watches porn, God will strike 0:08:18.200 --> 0:08:22.960 him down and use that fear to uh you know, 0:08:23.080 --> 0:08:27.760 get him to do what you want. No, uh yeah, yeah, uh, 0:08:27.920 --> 0:08:34.000 find find a nice uh Mormon gentleman, and uh you know, 0:08:34.120 --> 0:08:36.560 you guys, go be happy together and and don't watch 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:42.240 porn and live your life. Yeah, okay, let's keep going. 0:08:44.559 --> 0:08:47.320 Oh look at this. I love this one. This is 0:08:47.320 --> 0:08:52.199 from Emily. Subject line how do I Stop being annoying? 0:08:52.640 --> 0:08:56.440 What a great subject line for an email. Hello GEK, 0:08:56.800 --> 0:09:00.000 my name is Emily. I recently have become very self away, 0:09:00.280 --> 0:09:02.720 and it's become a curse and a blessing. Although I 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:04.719 feel like I've become a better person because of it, 0:09:04.880 --> 0:09:06.760 I also feel like I'm so aware of how much 0:09:06.800 --> 0:09:09.280 I talk that I'm spiraling, that I have been that 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:12.120 one annoying person my whole life, and I don't know 0:09:12.160 --> 0:09:15.520 how to control it. My nearest resolution was to talk less, 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:18.360 but so far I have failed. I'm conflicted with the 0:09:18.400 --> 0:09:21.640 fact that I should not have to change who I am. 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:25.120 I recently spent two hours ranting to my parents about 0:09:25.120 --> 0:09:28.640 my job, and afterwards I felt this immense sense of 0:09:28.800 --> 0:09:31.720 guilt because I feel like I annoyed them the whole time. 0:09:32.160 --> 0:09:35.160 Just looking for thought, Thanks gek, Emily. Wow, what a 0:09:35.200 --> 0:09:38.000 great email. What a great email. I want to take 0:09:38.000 --> 0:09:41.000 a second to collect my thoughts on this. First of all, 0:09:41.120 --> 0:09:43.880 I just I really believe this. I believe this in 0:09:43.920 --> 0:09:48.560 my soul, deeply. I really believe this. I'm gonna say 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:56.480 this listen. First of all, being annoying is not that bad. 0:09:57.040 --> 0:09:59.120 I just want you to know, Emily, even if you are, 0:09:59.120 --> 0:10:00.439 and I'm not gonna I don't know you. I don't 0:10:00.440 --> 0:10:02.720 know if you're annoying or not. Even if you're annoying, 0:10:02.840 --> 0:10:06.320 it's not that bad. Like I swear on my life, 0:10:07.559 --> 0:10:10.480 you know what. I know that, like, being annoying is 0:10:10.600 --> 0:10:15.480 not commonly seen as a actively positive trait. But uh, 0:10:15.760 --> 0:10:18.480 it's it's not that bad. Being annoying and kind of 0:10:19.000 --> 0:10:22.480 sucking and like being irritating is not that bad. You 0:10:22.520 --> 0:10:24.559 could be There's way worse things you could be than annoying. 0:10:24.600 --> 0:10:30.280 You could be fucking uh, you could be uh nasty, 0:10:31.000 --> 0:10:34.600 you can be mean, you can be cold, you can 0:10:34.640 --> 0:10:40.360 be harsh, you can be so many other things besides 0:10:40.520 --> 0:10:45.720 just annoying. So just first of all, being annoying to 0:10:45.760 --> 0:10:49.360 me is it's a neutral thing. It's not actively bad. Okay. 0:10:51.320 --> 0:10:54.840 The second thing is, so, uh you're try I think 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:58.560 there's something there's it's you're bringing up a very interesting 0:10:58.640 --> 0:11:02.079 conflict that a lot of people, myself included have, which 0:11:02.120 --> 0:11:10.880 are okay, Uh, convention, I don't know. Modern wisdom says 0:11:11.640 --> 0:11:18.520 to be yourself Jesus, just unabashedly be yourself, be who 0:11:18.520 --> 0:11:23.480 you are, and you'll attract the right people. And you'll 0:11:23.559 --> 0:11:27.280 the people that you turn away will it doesn't matter 0:11:27.280 --> 0:11:28.920 because they weren't the right fit for your life anyway. 0:11:28.960 --> 0:11:31.640 That's what modern wisdom tells you and I and. 0:11:31.640 --> 0:11:36.240 I I believe that to a degree, although as I 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:38.240 get older and as I have more life experience, I 0:11:38.280 --> 0:11:40.880 continue to I check back in on that belief and 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:44.000 I'm like, oh, maybe I should cut my fucking hair, 0:11:44.120 --> 0:11:49.559 you know something like that. Right, So, I think it's 0:11:49.559 --> 0:11:52.719 probably somewhere in between. It's like, look, you don't want 0:11:52.720 --> 0:11:55.079 to like kill off the essence of who you are 0:11:55.400 --> 0:11:56.640 to fit into society. 0:11:57.240 --> 0:11:59.760 But if you make the conscious choice where you're like, 0:11:59.800 --> 0:12:01.760 you know what, Like like, I actually love the way 0:12:01.760 --> 0:12:03.440 you're coming at this, You're like, you know what, look 0:12:03.920 --> 0:12:05.440 like you're laying it out on the table. You're being 0:12:05.520 --> 0:12:09.320 very logical. You're like, look, I have identified that I 0:12:09.360 --> 0:12:12.280 am a little annoying, and I'm going to make and 0:12:12.400 --> 0:12:16.840 I would like to fit in better into society because 0:12:16.920 --> 0:12:20.080 I have decided that that will make me happier, that 0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:23.800 will improve my life being less annoying. Therefore, I am 0:12:23.840 --> 0:12:27.520 going to make a conscious effort to be less annoying. 0:12:28.080 --> 0:12:30.920 I think that's fair. I think there's a lot I 0:12:30.960 --> 0:12:34.080 think like accepting yourself and trying to change yourself. There's 0:12:34.080 --> 0:12:38.599 a yin and yang to it. And I wouldn't I 0:12:38.600 --> 0:12:41.720 don't want to blind I wouldn't blindly follow either the 0:12:41.760 --> 0:12:46.360 conventional wisdom of be yourself versus step in line. You 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:50.800 got to find a nice little in between, right, But 0:12:50.920 --> 0:12:52.920 this is this email. This is from a person who's 0:12:52.960 --> 0:12:58.880 decided that they're annoying and wants to change. And I'm well, okay, 0:12:58.920 --> 0:13:01.120 I know you're conflicted that you should not have to change. 0:13:02.440 --> 0:13:04.560 Uh sorry, I don't know if you said that you well, 0:13:04.720 --> 0:13:07.679 actually know I'm lying you. Okay, your new year's resolution, 0:13:07.760 --> 0:13:11.880 it says here, my new year's resolution was to talk less. Okay, 0:13:11.920 --> 0:13:14.760 So you made an active effort to be less annoying, 0:13:15.600 --> 0:13:19.240 which I respect. I respect. I think I think it's 0:13:19.280 --> 0:13:24.560 good to yeah, work on yourself here, but but just 0:13:24.600 --> 0:13:31.120 with like with like talking too much. I mean, look, Emily, 0:13:31.200 --> 0:13:33.400 here's the talk as much as you want. But I 0:13:33.440 --> 0:13:37.520 think if you're having a conversation with somebody, you want 0:13:37.520 --> 0:13:41.080 to be to some degree, you want to be conscious 0:13:41.120 --> 0:13:45.880 of them to some degree of course, and uh, you know, 0:13:46.000 --> 0:13:48.199 just make sure you're in your conversations you're having a 0:13:48.240 --> 0:13:51.679 give and take, you know that, because nobody, I guess 0:13:51.760 --> 0:13:55.120 nobody wants to be like talked at in their interactions. 0:13:55.720 --> 0:13:57.840 They want a little bit of like like, go ahead 0:13:57.880 --> 0:14:00.600 and rant for an hour, but then after that you're done, 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:02.679 be like but what you know, how was your day. 0:14:02.679 --> 0:14:05.679 What's going on with you? You are right? Was everything? Okay? 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:09.360 A really beautiful relationship is two people each taking turns 0:14:09.480 --> 0:14:14.760 ranting at each other for two hours. So you know, 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:18.160 don't feel don't don't don't feel guilty, don't feel shamed 0:14:18.640 --> 0:14:20.800 about being annoying. It's I swear on my life. There's 0:14:20.800 --> 0:14:22.640 so much worse things you could be than be annoying. 0:14:25.560 --> 0:14:28.000 But yeah, I don't. I don't know. I that was 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:30.720 my That was more of an analysis than it was advice, 0:14:30.880 --> 0:14:35.840 which is good because I like analysises are Okay, you 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:38.600 said I'm looking for thought. That's great. I feel like 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:40.760 I didn't give Okay, you didn't say you're looking for advice. 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:42.240 You said you were looking for thought, and I feel 0:14:42.240 --> 0:14:46.160 like I gave that. Okay, Now I'm being a little annoying, which, 0:14:46.200 --> 0:14:49.760 by the way, as I've established, is fine. Let's keep going, 0:14:52.200 --> 0:14:57.160 all right. This is from Marcella subject line working at 0:14:57.240 --> 0:15:02.560 best Buy a free experience. Hi, Lyle, I feel like 0:15:02.600 --> 0:15:05.320 I need to get this story off my chest. I 0:15:05.320 --> 0:15:07.840 worked at best Buy for two years twenty twenty one 0:15:07.920 --> 0:15:11.080 to twenty twenty three. I started as seasonal and then 0:15:11.120 --> 0:15:15.360 became a full time Verizon rep. I started noticing odd 0:15:15.360 --> 0:15:18.240 things around the building. One morning, I walk in and 0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:21.360 my manager is giving someone else a BackRub, not realizing 0:15:21.440 --> 0:15:24.520 I was in there. Flash forward a few months later, 0:15:24.600 --> 0:15:28.080 a new guy starts up front. He seems normal until 0:15:28.120 --> 0:15:30.200 he drops his phone on the floor and I go 0:15:30.280 --> 0:15:33.240 to pick it up and his lock screen is presumably 0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:38.320 him and his friends at a furry convention. So what off? 0:15:38.720 --> 0:15:40.920 All right? Hold on? Kind of fuck this person who 0:15:40.920 --> 0:15:44.320 wrote this email? All right, hold on, hold on. I 0:15:44.360 --> 0:15:46.840 cannot hold this news in any longer. And I go 0:15:46.920 --> 0:15:50.720 to tell my other coworkers, and dude, okay, hold on. 0:15:51.040 --> 0:15:54.240 The person who wrote this email bothers the shit out 0:15:54.240 --> 0:15:57.960 of me, okay, because you're being a little bit of 0:15:58.000 --> 0:16:03.240 a prick. And here's the thing. Okay, so what all right? 0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:05.360 So you saw your friend by the way, here's the thing. 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:06.640 I just I'm not. 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:09.280 I do. 0:16:09.400 --> 0:16:12.040 We've talked about this on this fucking show a billion times, 0:16:12.040 --> 0:16:15.720 but I'll just just to say it again. I I don't. 0:16:16.480 --> 0:16:20.400 I don't think that I am uh in any I 0:16:20.400 --> 0:16:24.640 am not in any way, shape or form associated with 0:16:24.920 --> 0:16:31.880 the furry subculture. It's its own thing. However, as a 0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:37.080 pure like from a purely logistical standpoint and symbolic standpoint. 0:16:37.600 --> 0:16:43.720 I am undeniably an adult man who regularly wears an 0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:48.760 animal costume. I am undeniably that I don't think that 0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:51.800 that makes me a furry, but I do think and 0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:59.200 endows me with the responsibility to defend furries because I, 0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:01.120 like I said, I am, I am a man who 0:17:01.240 --> 0:17:04.720 dresses up regularly in a in an animal costume. So 0:17:04.720 --> 0:17:06.200 I'm gonna I'm gonna go on a limb. I'm gonna 0:17:06.200 --> 0:17:10.400 defend this man, and I'm gonna say that I think 0:17:10.440 --> 0:17:13.359 it was I think it's a little fucked up that 0:17:13.840 --> 0:17:17.760 you saw that this guy was having a good time 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:21.600 with his homies at the at the at the dress 0:17:21.680 --> 0:17:25.800 up like a wolf and fuck each other party. Sounds 0:17:25.840 --> 0:17:28.120 like either having a good time and you're out you're 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:30.800 out here trying to tell Also, you're like telling your 0:17:30.840 --> 0:17:32.920 other coworkers like it's a secret. It's on his fucking 0:17:33.000 --> 0:17:36.840 phone anyway, all right, I cannot hold this news in 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:39.320 any longer, and I go to tell my other coworkers 0:17:39.359 --> 0:17:42.520 and find out in fact that I am the outlier 0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:46.480 the whole time. Fifty percent, not exaggerating of the staff 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:49.920 was in the furry community, and thirty percent she wrote 0:17:49.960 --> 0:17:54.359 this in all caps participated in sexual activities with one another. 0:17:55.800 --> 0:17:59.240 Sounds awesome. I nearly quit, but a last I stayed 0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:02.879 employed at the best Buy. You know what, I fucking dude, 0:18:02.880 --> 0:18:05.359 fuck the person who wrote this email. Okay, you okay, 0:18:05.840 --> 0:18:11.000 this guy. These people they work at best Buy all day, 0:18:11.920 --> 0:18:15.440 like most of their life is just getting screamed at 0:18:15.600 --> 0:18:18.920 by the insane people who are still shopping. I get 0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:21.440 the only people who are still going in person to 0:18:21.520 --> 0:18:24.840 buy stuff at best Buy are like old insane people. 0:18:25.520 --> 0:18:30.520 And these motherfuckers, Okay, they're working retail at the best Buy. 0:18:30.560 --> 0:18:35.200 They're getting yelled at every day. Their lives are are sucking. 0:18:35.800 --> 0:18:37.800 And you know what, the you know, the one thing 0:18:38.640 --> 0:18:41.879 that makes them happy, Marcella. You know the one thing 0:18:41.920 --> 0:18:46.639 that makes them happy is wearing a horse costume and 0:18:46.680 --> 0:18:49.240 getting fucked in the ass. And I think that's awesome. 0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:52.080 I think that's beautiful. I'll let them have it, Marcella. 0:18:52.520 --> 0:18:54.280 What are you doing here? Why? Why is this such 0:18:54.320 --> 0:19:00.280 a big deal? All right? Hold on, I nearly quit. Last, 0:19:00.320 --> 0:19:03.720 I stayed employed at the best Buy. A furry scuffle 0:19:03.920 --> 0:19:06.439 broke out in the warehouse one day when one of 0:19:06.520 --> 0:19:09.520 the alpha furres okay, now you're getting sucked into it too. 0:19:09.760 --> 0:19:12.000 When one of the alpha furres, who was in a 0:19:12.040 --> 0:19:14.919 thrupple with a guy and a girl also working at 0:19:14.920 --> 0:19:17.199 best Buy had found out that, in fact, he was 0:19:17.240 --> 0:19:19.840 just getting cheated on the whole time, he ran out 0:19:19.880 --> 0:19:23.400 of the store, into the parking lot and moved to Texas. 0:19:23.440 --> 0:19:26.600 In three days, they had to pull employees from other 0:19:26.720 --> 0:19:29.600 stores because almost half of our staff went out of 0:19:29.640 --> 0:19:35.160 town all caps for the Furry Convention. I I okay, 0:19:35.160 --> 0:19:38.040 hold on, hold on, holo, I have a new thing. 0:19:38.080 --> 0:19:40.440 By the way, hold on. I sorry. I drank a 0:19:40.480 --> 0:19:44.320 lot of coffee before I started recording this. I'm gonna 0:19:44.320 --> 0:19:47.520 calm down for a second. I want to apologize, okay, 0:19:47.560 --> 0:19:49.720 the person who wrote this email, Marcella. I want to 0:19:49.720 --> 0:19:53.040 apologize to Marcella. I want to apologize to Marcella. I said, 0:19:53.080 --> 0:19:55.000 I said fuck them, I said some choice things about them. 0:19:55.040 --> 0:19:59.240 I want to apologize because as I'm getting deeper into 0:19:59.280 --> 0:20:03.640 this email, I'm coming up with a new theory. I'm 0:20:03.640 --> 0:20:09.440 coming up with a new theory, and the theory that 0:20:10.080 --> 0:20:16.640 I'm coming up with is making me sad. My theory 0:20:16.840 --> 0:20:22.119 is that the person who wrote this email is secretly, 0:20:23.560 --> 0:20:27.800 unconsciously really upset that she was not invited to go 0:20:27.880 --> 0:20:33.520 to the Furry Convention. I genuinely believe that because look, 0:20:33.560 --> 0:20:36.679 this person. They also they worked at best Buy and 0:20:36.720 --> 0:20:42.960 they worked at Verizon, and they I don't know if 0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:45.720 they have a lot of friends. I don't know if 0:20:47.840 --> 0:20:50.719 they're up. So I just I just like, I think 0:20:50.920 --> 0:20:56.359 they're seeing their coworkers having so much fun having sex 0:20:56.400 --> 0:20:59.960 with each other in dog costumes, and they kind of 0:21:00.080 --> 0:21:04.000 wish that they had something like that, and they don't, 0:21:05.200 --> 0:21:10.439 and so they are just upset and they're they're taking 0:21:10.440 --> 0:21:14.560 it out in this email. And so Marcella, listen, I 0:21:14.600 --> 0:21:18.560 just want you to know, like you can look, find 0:21:18.560 --> 0:21:22.520 your own version of a free convention. Go do Go. 0:21:22.880 --> 0:21:24.080 I don't know, I don't know who you are. I 0:21:24.080 --> 0:21:27.119 don't know anything about you, but uh, I don't know. 0:21:27.200 --> 0:21:30.360 Go find something to do instead of getting pissed off 0:21:30.359 --> 0:21:33.600 at other people. All right, Okay? Then then she wrote 0:21:33.600 --> 0:21:35.160 that's all I have to share. Do not go into 0:21:35.200 --> 0:21:38.280 best Buy. I'm not kidding. It is a cult. Do 0:21:38.400 --> 0:21:43.320 not get sucked in. Oh I'm going to best Buy 0:21:43.440 --> 0:21:45.760 and I'm getting sucked in. Baby, if you know what 0:21:45.840 --> 0:21:48.600 I mean. All right, that was gross, Let's keep going. Uh, 0:21:48.680 --> 0:21:54.400 all right? This is from Shay random fat. They wrote, 0:21:54.600 --> 0:21:57.240 don't read my email on stream. I kind of want 0:21:57.280 --> 0:22:00.560 to read it. And why would you send me an 0:22:00.560 --> 0:22:03.880 email and tell me not to read it on stream? 0:22:04.240 --> 0:22:05.879 Why would you send me I kind of want to 0:22:05.920 --> 0:22:08.760 read this on stream, just despite this person. Why would 0:22:08.760 --> 0:22:14.359 they send me an email to not read it on stream? 0:22:14.760 --> 0:22:17.600 All right? Anyway? Sorry, I don't know why. I'm sorry. 0:22:17.600 --> 0:22:21.480 I think when I think, when I drink too much coffee, 0:22:21.520 --> 0:22:23.520 I just go off the rails so little too much? 0:22:24.000 --> 0:22:28.000 All right. This is from an Oscar subject line I'm 0:22:28.040 --> 0:22:34.680 obsessed with my ex. Hello, mister lyle Chan, my name 0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:39.200 is Oscar. I've texted my ex again after six months 0:22:39.240 --> 0:22:42.679 of getting over her lately missing her quite often, and 0:22:42.720 --> 0:22:45.239 decided to come up with a master plan to make 0:22:45.359 --> 0:22:55.160 us fall in love again. Okay, all right, okay, even 0:22:55.160 --> 0:22:57.879 though she's talking and falling in love with someone else. 0:22:58.000 --> 0:23:05.040 Oh okay, all right. Ah, Jesus christis is gonna make 0:23:05.080 --> 0:23:09.520 me really sad. I had to talk with her about 0:23:09.560 --> 0:23:12.400 us getting together again, reminding her how we promised each 0:23:12.400 --> 0:23:14.240 other that in the end when we're older, we will 0:23:14.240 --> 0:23:16.840 get back together. When we broke it off back then, 0:23:16.880 --> 0:23:20.679 those months ago, she agreed how we can get together 0:23:20.760 --> 0:23:25.080 only if things don't work out with them together. She agreed, Okay, okay, 0:23:25.320 --> 0:23:28.120 I'm trying to this person has a little some grammatical 0:23:28.240 --> 0:23:30.240 errors in this email, but I'm gonna try to interpret 0:23:30.240 --> 0:23:34.200 them and translate it. She agreed that we can get 0:23:34.200 --> 0:23:36.480 back together only if things don't work out with her 0:23:36.520 --> 0:23:39.040 and the guy that she's talking to. Now for me 0:23:39.160 --> 0:23:41.840 to decide and rather be alone and work on myself, 0:23:42.520 --> 0:23:46.159 dying waiting for her, missing every moment, clinging to her, 0:23:46.240 --> 0:23:52.119 still patiently waiting for her to be complete with this guy. Also, 0:23:52.240 --> 0:23:56.200 we agreed to have sex too, while they are trying 0:23:56.480 --> 0:24:00.399 to get together and still in the talking stage, pose 0:24:01.160 --> 0:24:05.600 planning to make the sex to benefit to make her 0:24:05.720 --> 0:24:09.800 love me and gain feelings back. Okay, this person called 0:24:09.840 --> 0:24:17.479 me is this person is this person Japanese? Because if oh, well, 0:24:17.520 --> 0:24:21.000 okay ask her. Okay, I'm just trying to figure out 0:24:21.000 --> 0:24:24.760 if English is this person's first language or nots because 0:24:24.800 --> 0:24:28.639 they called me lyle chan uh okay okay, no, by 0:24:28.640 --> 0:24:30.600 the way, hold on by, I just I just hold on. 0:24:30.680 --> 0:24:32.399 I just want to Okay, I was making I was 0:24:32.440 --> 0:24:35.520 not making fun of but I was. I was. I 0:24:35.520 --> 0:24:38.520 think I made a rude comment about this person's grammatical errors. 0:24:38.760 --> 0:24:41.280 Did not realize that they were not a native English speaker. 0:24:41.320 --> 0:24:45.520 I apologize for that. Okay. If you're not a native 0:24:45.560 --> 0:24:48.160 English speaker, please keep emailing me. I promise I will 0:24:48.160 --> 0:24:50.920