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Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Hi?

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Speaker 2: Is this Lyle?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Who's this?

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Speaker 2: This is Frank?

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Speaker 1: Hey Frank. How's it going? Man?

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Speaker 3: Good? How are you?

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Speaker 1: I'm good? What are you doing?

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Speaker 2: I am sitting here waiting to talk to you.

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Speaker 1: Oh what are you waiting to talk to me about?

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Speaker 1: Anything in particular?

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Speaker 4: Uh?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, fucking my well, my uncle's fiance.

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Speaker 1: Fucking your uncle's fiance. Okay, yeah, all right, tell me

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Speaker 1: how that went down.

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Speaker 2: Well, I was lonely and horny and my uncle wasn't

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Speaker 2: paying any attention to said fiance. And one night me

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Speaker 2: and my actual aunt went over to hang out with her,

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Speaker 2: and she said something about never getting laid and made

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Speaker 2: a cut. I said something about cooking, and she asked

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Speaker 2: what that was and I explained it and she said, oh,

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Speaker 2: I wish I'm not going to say my uncle's name,

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Speaker 2: but would do that. And then I had a dream

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Speaker 2: that I ate or asked that night and for some

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Speaker 2: reason told her the next day and I kind of

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Speaker 2: started things off, and then I ended up kissing her,

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Speaker 2: and then like a half hour later, she was blowing

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Speaker 2: me and the blood up was trash, and she looked

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Speaker 2: at me and she was like, fuck me, And so

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Speaker 2: obviously I fucked her.

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Speaker 5: And then that happened probably I don't know, twenty more times.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I keep going.

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Speaker 2: And then that whole time, she wasn't fun my uncle.

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Speaker 2: And then as soon as I found out that they

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Speaker 2: started fucking again, I was like, okay, I'm good, and

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Speaker 2: I I stopped fucking her. And then a few months

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Speaker 2: went by, I didn't talk to her. I didn't really

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Speaker 2: talk to my uncle, and then he found out because

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Speaker 2: I'm stupid, and unblocked her on Snapchat, and he went

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Speaker 2: through her phone one night and saw the messages that

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Speaker 2: she saved, which I told her not to save, but anyway,

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Speaker 2: and then my mom had found out about it while

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Speaker 2: it was going on, texted her and said, cut this

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Speaker 2: shit out, blah blah blah blah, And he also found

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Speaker 2: those messages, so he knew that everyone knew that it

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Speaker 2: was happening except for him, and no one told him.

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Speaker 2: So then he didn't talk to any of us for

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Speaker 2: like six months. And then one of our family friends

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Speaker 2: passed away and we all ended up at a party

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Speaker 2: together and we were there, was like seven or eight

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Speaker 2: of us smoking a blunt and then everyone else went

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Speaker 2: inside and it was just us, and I was I

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Speaker 2: like looked at him and I was like, I'm sorry,

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Speaker 2: you know, like I feel like shit for what I did,

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Speaker 2: and if I could, I don't do it. But like

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Speaker 2: that's not going to change anything. And so that was

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Speaker 2: I don't know, probably almost two years ago. And fast

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Speaker 2: forward to now and we hang out with them every weekend,

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Speaker 2: which is pretty awkward, and he actually just found out

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Speaker 2: that she was cheating on him again with some other

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Speaker 2: dude and now they're in the middle of splitting up.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so this wasn't just like some porn you watched.

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Speaker 1: This actually happened.

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Speaker 2: No, no, this is this isn't my life. This is

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Speaker 2: some fucked up shit that happened in real life.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So when your uncle found out, what exactly was

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Speaker 1: his reaction, because you're telling me that you said you

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Speaker 1: were sorry to him, but I feel like we didn't

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Speaker 1: quite get how he reacted.

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Speaker 2: So it was he messaged me over. He sent me

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Speaker 2: a message on Facebook messenger, and he basically said, you're

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Speaker 2: lucky your family because if you weren't, you'd already be dead.

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Speaker 2: And if you see me coming, you better fucking run.

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Speaker 1: You guys need to grow up with the Facebook messenger

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Speaker 1: on the snapchack. Do you guys have phones? Tex just

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Speaker 1: text each other? Okay? All right, So I mean were

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Speaker 1: you scared at that point that he was going to hurt.

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Speaker 2: You kind of a little bit. Yeah, because I shouldn't

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Speaker 2: have done what I did. He's got like he's crazy.

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Speaker 2: It was it was not a good idea.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Uh, he's crazy. Can you elaborate on that.

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Speaker 2: Uh, he's just had he's had a lot of trauma,

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Speaker 2: so he's just fucked up.

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm mm hmm. And uh, he recently is splitting

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Speaker 1: up with you said that this. You said that you

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Speaker 1: had sex with his fiance two years ago and now

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Speaker 1: he's recently and then just now he is.

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Speaker 2: They had a kid since then and ship and yeah,

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Speaker 2: but yeah, so they he's actually trying to get hurt

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Speaker 2: him move out of his house right now, but she

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Speaker 2: won't leave.

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Speaker 1: They had a kid.

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Speaker 2: They had a kid before too.

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Speaker 1: They had a kid before you had sex with her.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: How old is the kid now?

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Speaker 2: Like six or seven?

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Speaker 1: Okay? Now the kid has no idea that his cousin

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Speaker 1: fucker his mom.

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Speaker 2: No, I don't think So, how do.

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Speaker 1: You feel about this situation in a retrospective? What do

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Speaker 1: you what do you wish you had.

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Speaker 2: Done I wish I never would have done it.

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Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. Uh, what do you feel like you could

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Speaker 1: do to rectify this situation?

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Speaker 2: I don't know that. See that That's really the main

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Speaker 2: reason I called this because I feel like because it

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Speaker 2: eats away at me every day in my life, Like

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Speaker 2: I just I feel like a piece of fucking shit

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Speaker 2: because I am because like we were so close that

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Speaker 2: we like grew up together. He was more like my

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Speaker 2: brother than my uncle. And I think about it every

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Speaker 2: day about how much a scumbag I am for doing it,

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Speaker 2: And I always want to say something to him about

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Speaker 2: how sorry I am, but like I don't want to

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Speaker 2: bring it up. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: Is your uncle like close to you in age?

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Speaker 2: He's eight years older.

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Speaker 1: Okay. And how was the rest of the family's reaction

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Speaker 1: to this?

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Speaker 2: They were all pissed, Okay.

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Speaker 1: And so I assume that this has been something you've

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Speaker 1: been feeling guilty about for the past two years.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's been It'll be like four actually.

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Speaker 1: Okay, four years.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: How they said this happened two years ago?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I meant four. Okay, it happened at the

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Speaker 2: end of twenty eighteen beginning of twenty nineteen.

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Speaker 6: Okay, so they were married for four more years after

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Speaker 6: your uncle found out that is fiance cheated on him

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Speaker 6: with you. Yeah, well, I guess that they're listen. I

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Speaker 6: guess that their decision to stay together or to split

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Speaker 6: up has really nothing to.

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Speaker 1: Do with you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: No, that's out of your you know, scope of of

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Speaker 1: business here. Okay, So yeah, what can you do to

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Speaker 1: directify the situation? Well, okay, so you say that you

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Speaker 1: have more things that you want to say to your uncle,

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Speaker 1: but you haven't said them because you Oh, well, I

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Speaker 1: don't want to bring it up. Yeah, okay, what are

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Speaker 1: those things that you want to say?

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Speaker 2: I don't see that. I don't even know what I

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Speaker 2: want to say. I just because it'll I'll just sound

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Speaker 2: like a broken record. You know, I've already said sorry?

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Speaker 2: How many more times can I say sorry? You know?

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Speaker 2: It's not like the only thing I can physically do

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Speaker 2: to show him that I am sorry is not fuck

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Speaker 2: his girl, Like, you know, what else am I going

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Speaker 2: to do?

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Speaker 1: I think that's a good stuf, right, I mean, clearly

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Speaker 1: this girl is not right for your uncle if she

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Speaker 1: slept with you and she also slept with another guy. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but we're not talking. But you know what, we're not

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Speaker 1: talking about her. We're not talking about him, We're talking

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Speaker 1: about you. So uh, I mean, what can you do? Yes?

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Speaker 1: I agree you can. You cannot have sex with your

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Speaker 1: uncle's girlfriends in the future. That's a good step. One

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Speaker 1: listen and like it sounds, it sounds as the go ahead.

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Speaker 1: What are we gonna say?

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Speaker 2: I like, I've started my own family, Like I've moved

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Speaker 2: on from that, you know, like, I have no interest

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Speaker 2: in going backwards.

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Speaker 1: You've started your own family. You have a you have

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Speaker 1: a wife and a child. Yeah, Okay, how long has

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Speaker 1: that been a thing?

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Speaker 2: Almost three years? So like towards the end of twenty

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Speaker 2: nineteen we got together.

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Speaker 1: Wow, so you had sex with your uncle's wife and

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Speaker 1: then almost immediately got into another relationship.

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Speaker 2: No, it was like it was like nine months.

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Speaker 1: Okay, does she know that this all happened? Just kids?

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Speaker 2: Oh, she knew about it before we got together because

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Speaker 2: we met through friends and I told my friend that

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Speaker 2: was the mutual friend, and she told her, and she

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Speaker 2: knew about it before we even got together, but she

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Speaker 2: didn't really know who it was. But then I told

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Speaker 2: her the story, and she's like, oh, so this is that, dude.

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Speaker 1: Okay, what was your wife's reaction when you told her

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Speaker 1: about this?

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Speaker 2: She just kinda shook her head. But now she's annoyed

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Speaker 2: that we see them every weekend and she doesn't like her.

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Speaker 2: And also she's like super attached to my kid, which

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Speaker 2: is super fucking annoying.

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Speaker 1: Your well, your aunts is super attached to your kid.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she's like every time we go there, she just

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Speaker 2: needs to hold them in. She always said, like we

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Speaker 2: were there this past weekend, she was like, my baby,

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Speaker 2: Shut the fuck up, bitch. It's not your baby, it's

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Speaker 2: my baby.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's got to be a pretty weird room to

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Speaker 1: be in.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's awkward, and she makes it awkward. And October

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Speaker 2: of twenty twenty one, my mom got married, and she

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Speaker 2: was confer besting her love for me then so to

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Speaker 2: more than two years, almost three years after it happened,

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Speaker 2: she was still saying, no, she loves me.

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Speaker 1: So three years after she cheated on your uncle with you,

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Speaker 1: she still was telling you that she.

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Speaker 2: Loves you, not me, not me. She was saying it

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Speaker 2: to her friend, and her friend told my mom.

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Speaker 1: She was telling her friends that she loves you. So

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Speaker 1: you heard through the grapevine that she is still in

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Speaker 1: love with you?

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Speaker 7: Yes?

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Speaker 1: Okay? And did you did you tell your uncle that?

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Speaker 2: No? Okay, But like at this, at this point in time,

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Speaker 2: it doesn't even matter, you know, is she what is

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Speaker 2: between me and my uncle has nothing to do with

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Speaker 2: her at this point in time, you know what I'm saying,

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Speaker 2: Because like he doesn't want to be with her. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: because you know what I'm saying, He just wants her

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Speaker 2: out of his life. Other than you know, it's the

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Speaker 2: parent of his kids. But he doesn't want to be

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Speaker 2: with her.

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Speaker 1: Okay. Well, I'm glad that your uncle had his his

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Speaker 1: his epiphany about her.

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Speaker 3: Uh.

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Speaker 1: It sounds as though you have like something unresolved to

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Speaker 1: talk about with you and your uncle, Like when when's

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Speaker 1: the last time I mean, you're in the room, you're

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Speaker 1: visiting this your fucking uncle, uh, consistently enough that you

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Speaker 1: know his wife or ex wife is holding your baby

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Speaker 1: and talking about how much she loves you. Like this

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Speaker 1: guy's in your life. From what you're telling me, when

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Speaker 1: is the last time you sat down with him and

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Speaker 1: had a conversation about this?

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's not since the first and only conversation we've

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Speaker 2: had about it.

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Speaker 1: You've only had one conversation about it, Yeah, and that

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Speaker 1: was four years ago, uh.

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Speaker 2: Like three years ago? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Does any part of you sense that he still has

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Speaker 1: animosity towards you about this?

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Speaker 2: Of course? How like wouldn't you?

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Speaker 1: I think you would probably benefit from having another conversation

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Speaker 1: with him about this, okay, right, because I mean he

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Speaker 1: sounds like he has some shit he wants to say

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Speaker 1: to you. You sound like you have some shit you

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Speaker 1: want to say to him, And it's probably a scary

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Speaker 1: thing to initiate, but I think I think it would

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Speaker 1: be a good idea if you've only talked about it

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Speaker 1: one once?

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Speaker 2: Okay?

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Speaker 1: You sure this wasn't a porn?

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Speaker 2: It's not a porn?

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Speaker 1: What kind of porn do you do? You watch? Like

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Speaker 1: step like? You know what's funny is I'm like every

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Speaker 1: time I watch porn, I'm like, why is every fucking porn?

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Speaker 1: I have to have like a mom aunt like incest

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Speaker 1: angle to it. Who's watching it? And now I know who?

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Speaker 1: It's you?

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Speaker 2: It's not do you?

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Speaker 7: Is that?

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Speaker 1: You?

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Speaker 7: Do?

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Speaker 1: You watch that? Like the step mom and uncle type

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Speaker 1: of porn?

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Speaker 3: And ship?

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Speaker 2: No? I don't.

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Speaker 1: You should just have that. You should have a conversation

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Speaker 1: with your uncle.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I could do that, do you.

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Speaker 1: Hmm? Okay, so you have a child, now you have

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Speaker 1: a family. Yeah, how is that going for you?

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Speaker 8: That's great?

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Speaker 1: Okay, good listen, you want to know what you here's

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Speaker 1: here's here's I mean, what I'm thinking is, no, you

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Speaker 1: cannot take back you having sex with your uncle's wife.

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Speaker 1: But all you can really do moving forward is have

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Speaker 1: a conversation with your uncle about it. That'll go however

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Speaker 1: it goes. And then just focus on being a good

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Speaker 1: dad and a good husband however you can. Because at

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Speaker 1: the end of the because now that you have a family,

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Speaker 1: it's like, you know, whether or not you feel like

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Speaker 1: a piece of shit, you you you have. The good

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Speaker 1: news for you is that you have greater things to

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Speaker 1: serve now your son and your your your own family.

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Speaker 1: And so you know, the road to no longer thinking

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Speaker 1: of yourself as a piece of shit is gonna be

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Speaker 1: a long one. But in the meantime, you can kind

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Speaker 1: of lose yourself in serving your family. True, And if

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Speaker 1: your uncle does get another girlfriend, do not have sex

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Speaker 1: with her.

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Speaker 2: I will not do that.

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Speaker 1: And if you're thinking about doing that you can go

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Speaker 1: watch a porn because there's lots of porns about that

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Speaker 1: and you can kind of fulfill your fantasies that way.

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Speaker 1: I was wondering why they make those porns, and now

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Speaker 1: I understand. So thank you for the clarity I've given me.

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Speaker 3: No problem, Frank.

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Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the

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Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?

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Speaker 2: I have a story about a couple of times I

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Speaker 2: fought my cat. Is you want to hear those? I

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Speaker 2: think I'm okay, Okay, Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna call

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Speaker 2: back with that one.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I'll talk to you soon.

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Speaker 3: All right, Bye, Thank you, Frank.

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Speaker 1: I feel like here's the thing, and no offense to

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Speaker 1: Frank is. I feel like after the story about fucking

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Speaker 1: his aunts, I don't I don't know if he's gonna

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Speaker 1: top it with the cat thing. And I'm afraid that

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Speaker 1: the story involves him fucking the cats, and I don't

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Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm in a good headspace to

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Speaker 1: hear about that. Hello, uh hello.

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Speaker 4: Hello, hi, hello, Hello?

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Speaker 1: Am I in a car? What's going on here?

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Speaker 9: You are in a car?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, turn left and you're gonna turn right.

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Speaker 9: You are almost where you need to be.

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Speaker 4: I'm so proud of you.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's where?

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Speaker 5: Where?

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Speaker 1: Where do I need to be?

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Speaker 4: Uh? You need to be in Wilson, North Carolina. I said,

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Speaker 4: you're never making it back to New York tonight.

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Speaker 1: Winston, North Carolina.

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Speaker 8: You say, Wilson, North Carolina.

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Speaker 1: What's tell me what's so great about Wilson, North Carolina.

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Speaker 4: They have a motel that's halfway between Florida and New York.

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Speaker 1: They have a hotel that's halfway between Florida and New York.

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Speaker 1: Is it is there? Are you current?

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Speaker 7: Well?

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Speaker 1: I feel like I'm like taking this journey with you

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Speaker 1: guys in this car. Are we going from Florida to

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Speaker 1: New York? From New York to Florida?

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Speaker 4: We are going from Florida to New York?

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Speaker 1: Okay? And what is uh? What is sparking this journey?

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Speaker 9: It's my fault. I was working over the summer on

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Speaker 9: a pirate ship, staying with my sister in Florida, and

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Speaker 9: now I gotta go back up to school names.

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Speaker 1: You're working on pirate ship? Who are you? Guys? First?

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Speaker 1: Let's start there. Who are you guys? How many other

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Speaker 1: five of you? Are there? Two of you? Is there? One?

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Speaker 1: Of you doing separate voices. What's what?

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Speaker 10: Where?

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Speaker 4: What?

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Speaker 1: Paint the scene of where I am right now?

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Speaker 9: There's okay, so there's two of us. You're in a

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Speaker 9: black twenty eleven here rio That sometimes works. I'm with

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Speaker 9: my mom jeans, although I don't follow up, and I'm NICKI.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you're with your mom. She's driving you from She's driving?

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Speaker 1: Or are you driving?

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Speaker 9: Yeah? She's driving because I don't like driving in the dark.

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Speaker 4: M mm hmm, all.

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Speaker 1: Right, So what is uh? How? How has the drive been.

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Speaker 9: Tiring?

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Speaker 4: And very rainy, very very rainy?

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Speaker 1: And Jane, what uh uh? Is this the first time

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Speaker 1: you've driven from Florida to New York? Or have you

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Speaker 1: taken long road trips like this in the past.

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Speaker 4: I have taken many, many long road trips like this

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Speaker 4: in the past.

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Speaker 1: Okay, And how does this one rank amongst the others?

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Speaker 4: Anytime I can keep this child of mind tapped it

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Speaker 4: in the car and talking to me makes it a

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Speaker 4: great trip.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's beautiful. Do you guys feel like it says

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Speaker 1: here that Nicky is eighteen, so she's kind of just

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Speaker 1: now on the cusp of leaving leaving the nest. Do

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Speaker 1: you feel as though, do you feel as though you

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Speaker 1: have not been spending as much time together as you

365
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Speaker 1: have in the past.

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Speaker 4: Well, that's true because Nicky is actually not getting ready

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Speaker 4: to leave the nest. They've been up starting your junior

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Speaker 4: year in college.

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Speaker 9: I've already, I've.

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Speaker 1: Already kind of like, yeah, you're starting your junior year.

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Speaker 1: What did you go to start? Were you one of

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Speaker 1: those kids that graduated high school when they were like sixteen?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly like that.

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Speaker 1: Yes, Oh wow, wow, So you had to so you

375
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Speaker 1: had to say goodbye a little bit earlier than most

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Speaker 1: parents do.

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Speaker 9: I mean I did. I did a year community college.

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Speaker 9: I did live at home for a little bit longer,

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Speaker 9: but I moved. I went to college when I was seventeen.

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm, so mm hmm. What kinds of things have

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Speaker 1: you guys been talking about on this on this long journey.

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Speaker 4: Well, the latest thing we were talking about is Nicky

383
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Speaker 4: introduced me to you. So we've been listening to several

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Speaker 4: of your podcasts. So I have been able to help you,

385
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Speaker 4: and I hope you appreciate it by yelling advice and

386
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Speaker 4: guidance to some of your callers over the years.

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Speaker 1: Well, oh, well, so, so you you're you're you're new

388
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Speaker 1: to listening to the podcast.

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Speaker 4: I am okay to her today.

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Speaker 1: So so, Jane, tell me if you can remember in

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Speaker 1: particular any callers, uh whose whose things you you you

392
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Speaker 1: sort of had you said you've been yelling out advice

393
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Speaker 1: and and commentary. Is is there any commentary that you've

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Speaker 1: had on any callers you've heard on the podcast that

395
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Speaker 1: you want to share with us right now?

396
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Speaker 4: Well, what about that prison lady?

397
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Speaker 9: We've been letting to a lot of old ones, and

398
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Speaker 9: there was one lady who like had a pental in

399
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Speaker 9: prison yep, but like he had gone to down for

400
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Speaker 9: raping someone like.

401
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Speaker 8: Mm hmm.

402
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Speaker 4: Yeah, we were. We were yelling out some much harsher

403
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:45,800
Speaker 4: guidance than you were giving out about one forest run one,

404
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:48,640
Speaker 4: do not walk, do not pass go, do not feel

405
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Speaker 4: like two hundred dollars, get away, get away?

406
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Speaker 1: Yes, I do remember. I do remember gently telling her

407
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Speaker 1: that she, uh, she she should back away from that situation.

408
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,159
Speaker 1: So you guys are starting from the Well, Jane, what

409
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Speaker 1: do you think about the podcast? Do you have any

410
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 1: you know, just overall commentary, any uh anything, anything you

411
00:26:15,280 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 1: think I could be doing better? Any just thoughts in

412
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:21,560
Speaker 1: particular that you want to share. I'm very curious about

413
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:22,960
Speaker 1: your your input.

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Speaker 4: Well, I think that and I think that you would

415
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:36,960
Speaker 4: agree that many people seem to be calling you as

416
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Speaker 4: a therapist, which you make very clear that you are not.

417
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Speaker 4: And it always amazes me that despite you telling people,

418
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Speaker 4: you know, I'm not a doctor, I don't play one

419
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Speaker 4: on TV, that people continue to seem to call in

420
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Speaker 4: with that same thing. So how you to use that,

421
00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 4: I don't know.

422
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:01,560
Speaker 8: I think you do a.

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00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 4: Great job actually being very patient with people and seeing

424
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Speaker 4: them through. But it's a funny thing to listen and

425
00:27:14,280 --> 00:27:17,240
Speaker 4: some of the situations that people get themselves in. That's

426
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,200
Speaker 4: probably the best part of the job I would get

427
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:21,920
Speaker 4: is people are just fun.

428
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Speaker 1: Yeah, they're interesting fun, it's very it's very interesting too.

429
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Speaker 1: And the people listening, I mean, they get this as

430
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Speaker 1: much as I do, because they're here listening to the calls,

431
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:39,199
Speaker 1: like diving into the dramas of people's lives for like

432
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:43,200
Speaker 1: ten minutes at a time and then you know, slurping

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Speaker 1: right back into reality.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

435
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:48,400
Speaker 3: Yeah.

436
00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 4: The amount of drama, I have to say, amazes or

437
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:57,040
Speaker 4: astounds me. I'm not sure which one it is. Yeah,

438
00:27:57,080 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 4: And that people seem to enjoy.

439
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:04,040
Speaker 3: Drama they do.

440
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Speaker 1: Do you now, when you say people seem to enjoy drama,

441
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:10,520
Speaker 1: do you mean people listening or the people engaged in

442
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:14,199
Speaker 1: the situation seem to be enjoy it? Interesting? So you

443
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:18,680
Speaker 1: think the people calling in there like enjoying the marinading

444
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Speaker 1: in their own conflict.

445
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Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that they live their lives to attract it,

446
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Speaker 4: not unlike somebody who's addicted to drugs or alcohol or

447
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 4: eating or whatever else. I think it can be for

448
00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:38,240
Speaker 4: many people, almost in addiction.

449
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 1: Have you felt that in your own life? You know,

450
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 1: at any point in your life where you felt as

451
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 1: though you were addicted to conflict?

452
00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:49,320
Speaker 5: Who?

453
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:54,520
Speaker 4: No, I don't do cos I don't know.

454
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:56,080
Speaker 9: You do kind of look quite a bit of.

455
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:06,600
Speaker 1: That you Well, now, Jane, you say you don't do conflict.

456
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 4: I don't do draw. I will tell you. I will

457
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 4: if you and I are having a disagreement, I will

458
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:26,320
Speaker 4: tell you how I feel about what you're doing. Okay,

459
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 4: you can tell me as well, and we move on.

460
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:32,240
Speaker 4: And of course it's very different. Nicky sees me as

461
00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:37,120
Speaker 4: her parents, which is it's a different role than I

462
00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:40,680
Speaker 4: would have with a friend or you know, any other associates.

463
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:44,960
Speaker 4: So we all we tend to pigeonhole people and how

464
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:48,560
Speaker 4: this is the only way I know you ergo. This

465
00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:52,720
Speaker 4: is how you are always and that's not necessarily true.

466
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:55,800
Speaker 1: Okay, So so would you say that NICKI would agree

467
00:29:55,800 --> 00:29:59,440
Speaker 1: with you in that it with the idea that you

468
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: do not entertain conflict.

469
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:07,560
Speaker 9: Yeah, that's true, but you don't.

470
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:11,720
Speaker 1: Oh well, okay, So that's what I was gonna ask you.

471
00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:13,440
Speaker 1: That's I was gonna ask you because Nikki just said

472
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: that you don't walk away from conflict because as you

473
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:21,760
Speaker 1: maneuver life as a human being, you run into infinite

474
00:30:21,840 --> 00:30:24,880
Speaker 1: opportunities to engage in conflict. But you say that you

475
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:29,240
Speaker 1: don't do conflict. Does that mean that you walk away

476
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 1: when you see a thing coming and you do a

477
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:35,160
Speaker 1: lot of conceding because you believe it's not worth it. Like,

478
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 1: what is your method of avoiding conflict?

479
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 4: It depends on what the conflict is and who the

480
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:50,440
Speaker 4: conflict is with. So I do a myriad of things. Sometimes,

481
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:52,520
Speaker 4: if it's not worth it, you walk away. Sometimes I

482
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 4: try to jolly people out of it, and sometimes I'll

483
00:30:56,400 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 4: snap at your heels.

484
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 1: What do you now when you say snap at your heels?

485
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:02,120
Speaker 1: What does that mean.

486
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:06,280
Speaker 4: That I would go toe to toe. If we want

487
00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:08,479
Speaker 4: to have an argument, we can have an argument.

488
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 1: Okay, what kinds of now? What kinds of things?

489
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 3: Now?

490
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:13,560
Speaker 4: You?

491
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:17,600
Speaker 1: Okay, So you're generally pretty conflict avoidance and this is

492
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:20,720
Speaker 1: a good thing, and you you you pick and choose.

493
00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: You're like, I'm not going to fight every single battle

494
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:27,520
Speaker 1: that presents itself to me to fight. I'm gonna really

495
00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:33,280
Speaker 1: pick carefully the conflicts I get into. Now, I ask you,

496
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 1: what kinds of conflicts are the ones that you cannot

497
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:41,120
Speaker 1: walk away from? What is? What kinds of conflicts are

498
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:44,360
Speaker 1: the ones where you're like, I have to break heels

499
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:47,200
Speaker 1: for this one, all right?

500
00:31:47,320 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 4: And I think you're probably too kind to me there,

501
00:31:50,520 --> 00:31:53,480
Speaker 4: But I think it's more that I try to avoid.

502
00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 4: I try to avoid, I try to avoid, and then

503
00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:00,640
Speaker 4: there's that one straw that breaks the camel's back and you.

504
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:02,480
Speaker 1: Get it interesting.

505
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 4: So the one person that you know you constantly content, Okay,

506
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 4: I can't take it anymore. We're done before that.

507
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,040
Speaker 9: You're just like passive aggressive about it.

508
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:16,200
Speaker 4: I can't be Yes, you know, I'm ready to blow

509
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 4: when I go into passive aggressive.

510
00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 1: Okay, do you do you have an example when?

511
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 9: Yes?

512
00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:26,000
Speaker 4: May I?

513
00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 1: Yeah? I would love to hear an example of a

514
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:29,920
Speaker 1: time where you tried to avoid it but you just

515
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:30,760
Speaker 1: couldn't any longer.

516
00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:37,640
Speaker 4: Was down with my daughter, my granddaughter too, and Mickey

517
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 4: down in Florida. And my granddaughter is only three years

518
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:46,440
Speaker 4: younger than Mickey. So they were being what I perceived

519
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:53,720
Speaker 4: is a little dismissive, rude, ill mannered, unwelcoming, and many

520
00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:57,440
Speaker 4: other adjectives. And I got there and put up with

521
00:32:57,480 --> 00:33:02,080
Speaker 4: it the first day. I up with it the second day,

522
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 4: and the third day I awoke to it and became

523
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:10,200
Speaker 4: past progressive. No, I don't need to go anywhere with you.

524
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 4: I'm staying here. You guys, do to your thing sor

525
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:16,920
Speaker 4: right now. I have no desire to be with you people.

526
00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 4: And I was really really angry at them, and when

527
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 4: they came back, so that is when I kind of

528
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 4: laid into them that said, this is the way you're

529
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 4: treating me. I don't like it. I don't need to

530
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,160
Speaker 4: put up with it anymore. You either owe me an

531
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:35,760
Speaker 4: apology and we go on from here, or I'm out

532
00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:37,680
Speaker 4: of here and we're leaving today.

533
00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: Mmm mmmm. They were.

534
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,840
Speaker 4: Not unruly, just rude and disrespectful and dismissive.

535
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:53,000
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. And this is this is interesting. So this

536
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: this is your your you said your your your granddaughter or.

537
00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:02,240
Speaker 4: Your your Yeah, my granddaughter and Mickey, my other child,

538
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 4: my youngest, my baby.

539
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:09,480
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. So it's is it? Is it a thing

540
00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:13,480
Speaker 1: where situations in your family where where as you kind

541
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:17,000
Speaker 1: of alluded to earlier in this conversation, you take an

542
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:21,240
Speaker 1: authoritative role, and an authoritative role such as a parental figure,

543
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 1: you you you are faced with having to engage a

544
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:31,800
Speaker 1: conflict from time to time. Exactly would you say that

545
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:35,920
Speaker 1: that in that authoritative role is typically where you most

546
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:38,040
Speaker 1: find yourself engaging in conflict.

547
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:46,000
Speaker 4: Absolutely, in the final analysis, nobody matters but your family, Nikki,

548
00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:51,359
Speaker 4: Do you know matter? Nobody matters enough to me in

549
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:57,319
Speaker 4: my life for me to really argue with them or

550
00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:01,680
Speaker 4: confront them more than my family, which is kind of

551
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:04,640
Speaker 4: a sick kind of thing to say. Perhaps, but I'm

552
00:35:04,640 --> 00:35:07,279
Speaker 4: not invested in anyone else as much as invested in

553
00:35:07,280 --> 00:35:07,720
Speaker 4: my family.

554
00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:15,120
Speaker 9: With Jewelery, Yes, I mean I'd say that about my

555
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:18,759
Speaker 9: best friend too, though, like I mean, he is my family.

556
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:24,719
Speaker 10: Much m hmm.

557
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:28,520
Speaker 1: So there we have that, you know what, Jane, I

558
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:32,040
Speaker 1: think that that is smart, right, because when you engage

559
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:37,880
Speaker 1: in conflict with somebody, you're in a way it shows

560
00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:41,840
Speaker 1: that they matter to you. So you're not just gonna

561
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:45,320
Speaker 1: You're not just gonna engage with anyone. You're only gonna

562
00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:48,839
Speaker 1: really engage with people who matter to you, uh, such

563
00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 1: as your family. So I think I think that's a

564
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:53,239
Speaker 1: smart way to go about that. I think that makes

565
00:35:53,239 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 1: a lot of sense. I think, well, Jane, thanks for

566
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,320
Speaker 1: sharing that with us.

567
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,200
Speaker 4: Well, you're welcome. And can I ask you you think

568
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:11,080
Speaker 4: that people seem addicted to drama? And obviously not every people, But.

569
00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:14,560
Speaker 1: Do I think that people are addicted to drama?

570
00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:14,839
Speaker 4: Oh?

571
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:19,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean every everyone does. Every single you know,

572
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:21,040
Speaker 1: I don't know if every single person that calls in

573
00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: with a thing is I definitely no, I know what

574
00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 1: you mean, though, I know you mean. I think drama

575
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:29,520
Speaker 1: and conflict can totally be an addiction. I think there

576
00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:32,840
Speaker 1: are people out there who love getting into fights, they

577
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:35,080
Speaker 1: love arguing. There there is a little bit of a

578
00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:39,799
Speaker 1: weird adrenaline rush that you get when you're in a

579
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 1: kind of a fuck you, no fuck you, no fuck

580
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:46,280
Speaker 1: you kind of a kind of a conflict that people

581
00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:52,080
Speaker 1: do get addicted to. Because there's a rush there, and

582
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:52,920
Speaker 1: I think that.

583
00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 4: Isn't there also the fall, you know, the up and

584
00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:00,879
Speaker 4: the down, the high in the world. I would think

585
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 4: that there would be, and that the low would feel

586
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:05,400
Speaker 4: so crappy you wouldn't want that high.

587
00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:10,959
Speaker 9: I think people just like having a common enemy, the

588
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,920
Speaker 9: one that they can are, something that they can complain

589
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:17,759
Speaker 9: about and be friends about because they have something to

590
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:18,400
Speaker 9: complain about.

591
00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:21,280
Speaker 4: It's nothing that unites people more than a common enemy.

592
00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:25,600
Speaker 1: That is very true. People love a common enemy. Uh,

593
00:37:26,120 --> 00:37:29,320
Speaker 1: they like to fight. And you know, look, I think

594
00:37:29,400 --> 00:37:31,880
Speaker 1: that I mean, it's an addiction like any just like

595
00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:37,040
Speaker 1: any other addiction. It's like finding something outside of yourself

596
00:37:37,160 --> 00:37:41,560
Speaker 1: to fill a hole. That's some real therapy shit that

597
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 1: I myself am and I think a lot of people

598
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,480
Speaker 1: are are trying to, uh to fix But you're you're

599
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:51,320
Speaker 1: definitely right about it. Jada and Niki, Is there anything

600
00:37:51,320 --> 00:37:53,360
Speaker 1: else you guys wanna want to say to the people

601
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 1: of the computer. I appreciate you guys talking to me

602
00:37:55,760 --> 00:37:59,000
Speaker 1: for this long. I know, well, I mean, I guess honestly,

603
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:01,160
Speaker 1: both you guys seems like you kind of have nothing

604
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:02,879
Speaker 1: better to do because you're trapped in a car for

605
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:04,880
Speaker 1: infinite hours. But thank you.

606
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:09,080
Speaker 9: Still, I have one joke for you.

607
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 1: Oh you have a joke. What do you call a

608
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 1: dog with no legs?

609
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 2: Yeah?

610
00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 1: What do you call a dog with no legs?

611
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:25,400
Speaker 9: It doesn't matter what you call.

612
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:26,160
Speaker 4: Them, he's not gonna come.

613
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 1: Jane, NICKI, thank you guys for calling.

614
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:34,799
Speaker 4: Thank you for taking our call.

615
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: Bye bye, take care guys. That was interesting. I liked

616
00:38:43,080 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 1: tearing from Jane and NICKI. Uh, they seem like they

617
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:49,600
Speaker 1: have a good relationship with each other. And I liked

618
00:38:49,640 --> 00:38:55,200
Speaker 1: hearing Jane's perspective on conflict that, Uh, there's something to

619
00:38:55,239 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 1: glean from that, right, Like choose carefully who and what

620
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:06,080
Speaker 1: you engage with as you maneuver around the world. Right,

621
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:09,200
Speaker 1: Like you've ever been in traffic and some guy does

622
00:39:09,239 --> 00:39:11,439
Speaker 1: some fucking thing to piss you off, and you go, ah,

623
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:14,400
Speaker 1: fuck you. You're like, you're engaging with this person, but

624
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 1: they don't deserve it. There's just some random motherfucker in

625
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 1: a car, you know, Like, really pick your spots, right,

626
00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: And Jane was picking good spots. Right. She's a mother,

627
00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:29,319
Speaker 1: she's a grandmother, Her children are doing things that are

628
00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 1: pissing her off. She's trying to set a good example.

629
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:33,760
Speaker 1: She's trying her best to be a good authority figure,

630
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:37,839
Speaker 1: and so that's a conflict that she'll engage with. She'll

631
00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 1: engage with because it's an important conflict to engage with.

632
00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:43,759
Speaker 1: I think that's a good principle to follow. I try to,

633
00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:47,520
Speaker 1: you know, remind myself of that anytime I want to

634
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,920
Speaker 1: get pissed off about something or engage in an argument

635
00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 1: or a fight, I'm like, is this worth it? Is

636
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:56,319
Speaker 1: this person that I'm about to fight with important enough

637
00:39:56,320 --> 00:39:58,400
Speaker 1: to me that I fight with them? Is this cause

638
00:39:58,960 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 1: important enough for me that I engage with this conflict?

639
00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:03,200
Speaker 1: Because if you don't do that, if you don't have

640
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:09,040
Speaker 1: a I want to say, if you don't have a

641
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:13,359
Speaker 1: standard by which like, if this conflict does not meet

642
00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:15,200
Speaker 1: my standard, I will not engage with it. If you

643
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:17,919
Speaker 1: don't have that, then you just get whisked away by

644
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 1: any possible thing that could could take your attention to

645
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:24,680
Speaker 1: to fuck around with it. And that's how you get

646
00:40:24,719 --> 00:40:28,800
Speaker 1: tired and exhausted with the world. So thank you Jane

647
00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:33,200
Speaker 1: for having that conversation with me. Hey, folks, these last

648
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:35,640
Speaker 1: couple of calls are from a live stream that I

649
00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 1: did with an adult film star named Kazumi. A quick

650
00:40:40,239 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 1: bio of Kazumi. She's a massive onlyfan star. She's been

651
00:40:44,719 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 1: on a bunch of other podcasts. We met at the

652
00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:52,279
Speaker 1: Avnxpo and I had her on my stream. She's very

653
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:54,760
Speaker 1: funny and if you'd like to watch the full episode

654
00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:56,480
Speaker 1: I did with her, you can find it on my

655
00:40:56,520 --> 00:41:01,319
Speaker 1: YouTube channel YouTube dot com slash lie forever. All right,

656
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:02,279
Speaker 1: let's get into it.

657
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:04,239
Speaker 5: Hello, O wa.

658
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 10: Hi Jackson.

659
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:10,200
Speaker 8: I'm so excited me. Hey guys, how are you doing.

660
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:14,919
Speaker 10: I'm doing great. I'm really excited to talk to you.

661
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:17,000
Speaker 10: You're taking my lyle virginity right now?

662
00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:20,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jackson. It says here that you have an irrational

663
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:23,040
Speaker 1: fear of holding babies.

664
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:25,840
Speaker 10: I agree with that.

665
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 8: Yeah, that's what that's what I said. Yeah. Sorry, hold on,

666
00:41:31,160 --> 00:41:34,920
Speaker 8: I'm holding a baby righted, right now, let me kind

667
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,960
Speaker 8: of compose myself.

668
00:41:36,080 --> 00:41:40,160
Speaker 1: Sure, tell us why you have a fear of holding babies?

669
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 8: Yeah, so, I guess my train of thought. I I

670
00:41:48,800 --> 00:41:51,440
Speaker 8: have a bunch of cousins right now who are my age,

671
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:57,320
Speaker 8: who are having babies. They're married and having children, and

672
00:41:57,400 --> 00:42:00,200
Speaker 8: they're they're newborns like they were just born the couple

673
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:07,080
Speaker 8: months ago. And I just what happens is as these

674
00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:09,640
Speaker 8: new mothers, especially cousins I've been hanging out with for

675
00:42:09,680 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 8: a really long time, they really they offer me and

676
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 8: like the rest of my family when we come and visit,

677
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:21,160
Speaker 8: they offer for me to hold the baby. And honestly,

678
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:26,359
Speaker 8: I just, I mean, I can kind of understand it.

679
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:28,160
Speaker 8: They want to share. I mean, this is a new

680
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:31,080
Speaker 8: member of my family and they're adorable, and I don't

681
00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:37,120
Speaker 8: hate babies. I just I think I would love to

682
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 8: enjoy it from afar, if that makes sense.

683
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:42,919
Speaker 1: So this, I feel like this kind of ties into

684
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:44,520
Speaker 1: what we were just talking about.

685
00:42:44,640 --> 00:42:44,799
Speaker 2: Right.

686
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 1: Do you have a fear of saying no when people

687
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:56,520
Speaker 1: ask to hold the baby?

688
00:42:56,120 --> 00:43:02,319
Speaker 8: Are you asking me? I'm asking you, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

689
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:06,200
Speaker 8: I Sometimes I'll say no and sometimes I'll say yes,

690
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:12,520
Speaker 8: Like it really depends on how insistent or really, I

691
00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:15,520
Speaker 8: don't know. Sometimes I really don't want to hurt someone's feelings.

692
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:17,839
Speaker 8: Sometimes I feel like they just take it personally when

693
00:43:17,880 --> 00:43:20,560
Speaker 8: I'm like, no, I just don't want to hold your baby.

694
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:24,360
Speaker 10: There's an evolutionary study that says that you know back

695
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,920
Speaker 10: that the reason why we like hug and squeeze things

696
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:29,279
Speaker 10: that are cute is because way back in the day,

697
00:43:29,320 --> 00:43:31,480
Speaker 10: we would see those things as a fret. We would

698
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 10: see a cute, little furry animal, and we would want

699
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:37,320
Speaker 10: to hold it tight, like so tight it explodes because

700
00:43:37,320 --> 00:43:39,920
Speaker 10: we want to get rid of it. You feel, do

701
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:42,239
Speaker 10: you feel like when you hold a baby you just

702
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:45,279
Speaker 10: want to squeeze it so hard it explodes, so that

703
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:48,360
Speaker 10: way you are the cute it's not part of the family.

704
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:54,080
Speaker 8: I mean, it's not quite that, because I know that

705
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 8: feeling that you're talking about. I definitely felt that before,

706
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:59,880
Speaker 8: more towards like dogs or cats, just how you honestly

707
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:03,040
Speaker 8: they or if that makes sense. But for the baby,

708
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:07,000
Speaker 8: I just I just get stressed out when I just

709
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,280
Speaker 8: I don't know. It's like my dark in truce is thoughts.

710
00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:11,480
Speaker 10: I know exactly.

711
00:44:11,520 --> 00:44:15,000
Speaker 8: I don't want to be responsible if something happened, like

712
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:17,920
Speaker 8: if I was in charge of the baby and I

713
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 8: got distracted or I just wasn't paying attention and I

714
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:22,200
Speaker 8: accidentally did something.

715
00:44:22,239 --> 00:44:23,480
Speaker 2: I don't want to be in charge of that.

716
00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:26,840
Speaker 1: I will say this, if you take what Kazumi just

717
00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 1: said about the history of how people would squeeze babies

718
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:32,279
Speaker 1: in order to kill them, and you told that to

719
00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:35,000
Speaker 1: whoever is asking you to hold a baby. They might

720
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:37,040
Speaker 1: not let you hold the baby anymore, which would solve

721
00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:37,600
Speaker 1: your problem.

722
00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:38,440
Speaker 10: Problem solved.

723
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:42,320
Speaker 8: Yeah, but there's also like that, I mean.

724
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:47,239
Speaker 10: There's also like no go ahead. Those intrusive thoughts mean

725
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:50,120
Speaker 10: that you just cherish the people around you, because there's

726
00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:51,920
Speaker 10: a study that you know, like we've all had that

727
00:44:51,960 --> 00:44:53,920
Speaker 10: fought where it's like we're driving down the highway and

728
00:44:53,920 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 10: we just want to snare and drive, or like if

729
00:44:56,719 --> 00:44:58,480
Speaker 10: I'm holding my keys, I just want to throw it

730
00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 10: down the gutter, or like, see you, I value our

731
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:03,920
Speaker 10: friendship so much I fantasize about spitting in your face,

732
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 10: knowing that it would ruin everything. And that intrusive thought

733
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:10,360
Speaker 10: is what keeps me grounded to this planet, you know,

734
00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:12,880
Speaker 10: like it may It makes me realize like I'm human

735
00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 10: and I'm feeling all the things i want to feel,

736
00:45:14,719 --> 00:45:16,759
Speaker 10: and I care about this baby, So do not let

737
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:19,480
Speaker 10: me hold it because I'm afraid of what I'm capable of.

738
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:22,480
Speaker 1: How would you feel about telling that to the to

739
00:45:22,840 --> 00:45:24,600
Speaker 1: these people that want you to hold their babies?

740
00:45:25,680 --> 00:45:32,280
Speaker 8: Jackson, You know what, well are you saying? Telling people?

741
00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:34,839
Speaker 8: Just admitting that this is an intrusive thought I have?

742
00:45:34,920 --> 00:45:39,239
Speaker 1: And yes, no, no, like what would like, look what

743
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:41,040
Speaker 1: happened if you just told the truth about and you

744
00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:43,440
Speaker 1: were like, listen, I don't want to hold this baby because,

745
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:45,680
Speaker 1: just for whatever reason, whenever I'm holding your baby, I

746
00:45:45,719 --> 00:45:48,279
Speaker 1: am also thinking about dropping it and crushing it and

747
00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:49,720
Speaker 1: then potentially eating it afterwards.

748
00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 10: I definitely wouldn't let you hold my baby out way

749
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:53,799
Speaker 10: and that way you want to say it.

750
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:55,919
Speaker 8: I don't want to beat that blunt about it.

751
00:45:57,800 --> 00:46:00,400
Speaker 10: Then you can just drop the baby, Psycho.

752
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:03,080
Speaker 8: If you dropped it, I can't do that.

753
00:46:03,239 --> 00:46:04,600
Speaker 10: I never have to hold a baby again.

754
00:46:04,719 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 1: That's a legitimate point. That's true. If you do one,

755
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:09,880
Speaker 1: you never have to do it ever again.

756
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:12,879
Speaker 10: Maybe trying like a baby put.

757
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:17,840
Speaker 8: Also costs like three thousand dollars probably and maybe jail wait.

758
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:20,160
Speaker 10: Drop.

759
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:23,240
Speaker 1: Can I ask where you got that number from? Jackson?

760
00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:29,760
Speaker 8: I would I mean medical bills? If I like, okay,

761
00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:30,479
Speaker 8: what do you mean?

762
00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 3: Oh?

763
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 10: I thought like you meant if I go on the

764
00:46:32,719 --> 00:46:34,960
Speaker 10: dark web. But I ask, like, for a hit on

765
00:46:35,040 --> 00:46:37,080
Speaker 10: a baby, it would cost three thousand dollars. That's that's

766
00:46:37,120 --> 00:46:40,480
Speaker 10: where my twisted. I was like, oh, it's only three k.

767
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:43,400
Speaker 1: That's five dollars. I mean to kill a baby's pretty

768
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:44,080
Speaker 1: good rating.

769
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:47,680
Speaker 8: It's pretty low for a hit. Yeah, I know, that's really.

770
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:49,000
Speaker 10: Six hundred dollars.

771
00:46:49,040 --> 00:46:50,319
Speaker 1: Abortions are only six hundred dollars.

772
00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:52,839
Speaker 10: Wortions are six hundred dollars without insurance, So you know.

773
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:54,919
Speaker 8: What, I didn't think about it like that.

774
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:57,840
Speaker 10: Yeah, I mean, you can save a lot of money,

775
00:46:58,040 --> 00:47:00,240
Speaker 10: but just having your family aboard.

776
00:47:00,719 --> 00:47:02,360
Speaker 1: Jackson's anything else you wanted to say to the people of.

777
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,520
Speaker 8: The computer before.

778
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:07,000
Speaker 6: Someone.

779
00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:10,759
Speaker 8: Yes, I I did smoke a little bit before I

780
00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:13,440
Speaker 8: got on the podcast, so I was And I'm really

781
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 8: glad I got to talk to you, Lyle.

782
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:19,200
Speaker 10: Look Jackson, no one can tell when you're high, but

783
00:47:19,360 --> 00:47:21,000
Speaker 10: everyone can tell when you're insecure.

784
00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:23,000
Speaker 1: I like that.

785
00:47:23,400 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 8: Oh you know what, I'll take that. I'll take that

786
00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:29,319
Speaker 8: to hurt for sure. Glad I got to talk to

787
00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:33,080
Speaker 8: both of you, because, um, I'm I'm I take pride

788
00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:36,879
Speaker 8: and as wards taking your gecky, I will I will

789
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 8: wear that at the badge Oh my god.

790
00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:41,080
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, take care of Jackson.

791
00:47:43,120 --> 00:47:43,959
Speaker 8: Have a good night, guys.

792
00:47:44,160 --> 00:47:49,560
Speaker 1: I like your idea of basically taking u your intrusive

793
00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:52,960
Speaker 1: thoughts and like, really because you don't want to examine them, right,

794
00:47:53,040 --> 00:47:55,560
Speaker 1: you don't want to examine the fat But if you

795
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 1: face them and you were all like, what if you

796
00:47:57,960 --> 00:47:59,600
Speaker 1: were honest about them? But you told you listen, I

797
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:01,640
Speaker 1: just have the thing and I'm not in control of it.

798
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:04,520
Speaker 1: But it's telling me to drop your baby, and you're

799
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:06,680
Speaker 1: just honest, like you're not a bad guy for the

800
00:48:06,719 --> 00:48:07,839
Speaker 1: thoughts that come into your head.

801
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:09,759
Speaker 10: You're a bad guy if I tell you that and

802
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:12,600
Speaker 10: then you make me hold your baby exactly like you

803
00:48:12,680 --> 00:48:15,200
Speaker 10: knew I was about to drop your fucking baby exactly.

804
00:48:15,320 --> 00:48:16,400
Speaker 1: That's on them if they give me.

805
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:19,560
Speaker 10: Whenever I meet someone and I think they're really cool,

806
00:48:19,560 --> 00:48:22,080
Speaker 10: like when I meet you, I always imagine just freaking

807
00:48:22,160 --> 00:48:25,240
Speaker 10: curb stomping them because I know that you wouldn't forgive

808
00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 10: me after, and that fear makes me just act right

809
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:30,960
Speaker 10: like I'm just like, I just can't do that.

810
00:48:30,960 --> 00:48:33,359
Speaker 1: That would be fucked up. Our brains want to sabotage

811
00:48:33,719 --> 00:48:36,239
Speaker 1: things for not just because they're sadistic.

812
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:40,240
Speaker 10: I think wherever fear is, that there is your task.

813
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:43,200
Speaker 10: And once you face fear, you will learn so much

814
00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 10: more about yourself and you know you have to battle

815
00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:47,200
Speaker 10: those intrusive thoughts.

816
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:48,120
Speaker 1: I like that.

817
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:52,040
Speaker 10: Yeah, I wish I could die for the attention.

818
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:54,719
Speaker 1: Do you think you get a lot of attention on that? Yeah,

819
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:59,000
Speaker 1: when you were in school, did you ever imagine your

820
00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:01,879
Speaker 1: own funeral and imagine how sad people will?

821
00:49:01,920 --> 00:49:06,120
Speaker 10: I committed suicide on Instagram like in high school, like

822
00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:08,920
Speaker 10: i'd like wrote, I wrote like a like a suicide

823
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,160
Speaker 10: letter on Instagram and just logged off for like a

824
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:15,680
Speaker 10: week comments just well yeah, because people were being me

825
00:49:15,760 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 10: in and then they stopped. They I think when I

826
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:21,120
Speaker 10: didn't die, they were kind of like, dude.

827
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:23,920
Speaker 1: Were they either? They must have been like I mean,

828
00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:27,040
Speaker 1: it's that's because you go from everyone is like remembering

829
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:29,239
Speaker 1: you and then they're fucking pissed. Yeah.

830
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 10: Yeah that was not l move, not not like the

831
00:49:32,080 --> 00:49:34,480
Speaker 10: best thing I did. But I like the attention. I

832
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:36,400
Speaker 10: wish I but that's you recover from that.

833
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 1: I feel like people would just be.

834
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:40,120
Speaker 10: I transferred schools.

835
00:49:42,080 --> 00:49:42,479
Speaker 3: I did.

836
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:44,040
Speaker 4: Who.

837
00:49:45,640 --> 00:49:47,120
Speaker 1: Hi, that's a good question.

838
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 7: Hello.

839
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:51,319
Speaker 1: How's it going? Man?

840
00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:55,400
Speaker 7: It's going? How are you guys?

841
00:49:55,960 --> 00:49:58,719
Speaker 10: Hey? Are you less nervous to talk to women because

842
00:49:58,760 --> 00:50:00,800
Speaker 10: I'm a gecko?

843
00:50:02,760 --> 00:50:05,160
Speaker 2: Maybe a little bit? You look a little less intimidating.

844
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:10,760
Speaker 10: Yeah, I look I look like less hot maybe tanner.

845
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 1: It says here that you're han't heard of anxiety talking

846
00:50:13,600 --> 00:50:16,200
Speaker 1: with women after having just gotten out of a four

847
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:18,839
Speaker 1: year relationship, and you were unsure how to get back

848
00:50:18,880 --> 00:50:20,400
Speaker 1: into the dating scene. Do you want to tell us

849
00:50:20,440 --> 00:50:21,160
Speaker 1: more about this?

850
00:50:24,400 --> 00:50:27,960
Speaker 7: Yeah, So I got into a relationship when I was

851
00:50:28,280 --> 00:50:32,200
Speaker 7: like eighteen nineteen. I was with her for four years.

852
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:34,560
Speaker 7: It was a pretty good relationship.

853
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:36,360
Speaker 2: We had a really good breakup.

854
00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:39,360
Speaker 7: It was no almost heard, it was mutual. And this

855
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:44,240
Speaker 7: was probably like two or three months ago. And recently

856
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:46,839
Speaker 7: I've been wanting to get back out there and talk

857
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:48,880
Speaker 7: to girls, get back in the dating scene. And then

858
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:52,399
Speaker 7: I also just moved and started college, so I lost

859
00:50:52,440 --> 00:50:54,560
Speaker 7: a lot of my friends while I was in that relationship.

860
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:59,080
Speaker 7: So I've been trying to make new friends, and lately

861
00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:03,399
Speaker 7: I had just been striking out. Every time I see

862
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:05,040
Speaker 7: a girl and I want to go up to her

863
00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:07,480
Speaker 7: and talk to her or anything like that, I just

864
00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:13,200
Speaker 7: get overwhelmed with anxiety. And yeah, kind of my anxiety

865
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:15,000
Speaker 7: is kind of takes over and I end up not

866
00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:16,560
Speaker 7: doing it well.

867
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 10: I have the ultimate RIZ tip for you. I was

868
00:51:19,040 --> 00:51:23,720
Speaker 10: in a relationship from thirteen to seventeen, so almost four years.

869
00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:27,839
Speaker 10: So I get you when you say, like getting back

870
00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:32,319
Speaker 10: into the market, and it's like your formative years and

871
00:51:32,360 --> 00:51:36,680
Speaker 10: like you're starting college. It feels like you don't understand

872
00:51:36,719 --> 00:51:41,640
Speaker 10: people for a while. My best advice when navigating the

873
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:45,399
Speaker 10: opposite sex is realizing that despite what the Internet may

874
00:51:45,440 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 10: tell you, men and women are not much more alike

875
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:50,759
Speaker 10: or different than you actually think. And the best way

876
00:51:50,800 --> 00:51:53,880
Speaker 10: to have a conversation with a woman is by being present, Like,

877
00:51:54,040 --> 00:51:55,880
Speaker 10: you're not gearing to have sex with me, You're not

878
00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:57,560
Speaker 10: even gearing to go on a date with me. You're

879
00:51:57,600 --> 00:52:02,760
Speaker 10: just gearing to get to know me and finding things

880
00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:06,000
Speaker 10: that you like to do and that empower you. So

881
00:52:06,080 --> 00:52:07,879
Speaker 10: let's say, if you have a hobby or if you're

882
00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:10,520
Speaker 10: going for a major that you're passionate about, I would

883
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:13,000
Speaker 10: make sure that you are really good at those things

884
00:52:13,239 --> 00:52:15,160
Speaker 10: and you feel really good about yourself. So that way

885
00:52:15,200 --> 00:52:18,920
Speaker 10: you attract people who have shared values and shared interest

886
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:21,160
Speaker 10: in hobbies, and that's the best way to find someone

887
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:22,000
Speaker 10: compatible with you.

888
00:52:22,840 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 1: How do you feel about that, Tanner?

889
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:30,880
Speaker 7: You know, that's that's some pretty good advice, and I

890
00:52:30,880 --> 00:52:34,360
Speaker 7: think I could use that. But I get in this

891
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:38,040
Speaker 7: situation and I just let my anxiety take over, Like

892
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:40,160
Speaker 7: I can't I feel like, I don't know if it's

893
00:52:40,160 --> 00:52:44,160
Speaker 7: a fear of rejection. I don't know if it's I

894
00:52:44,160 --> 00:52:44,879
Speaker 7: don't really know.

895
00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:45,239
Speaker 2: What it is.

896
00:52:45,320 --> 00:52:49,640
Speaker 3: But you tell a couple of days ago, no, go ahead,

897
00:52:49,719 --> 00:52:50,440
Speaker 3: go ahead, go ahead.

898
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 7: A couple a couple of days ago, I was at

899
00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:57,040
Speaker 7: Zoomies and I was picking up some stuff and me

900
00:52:57,120 --> 00:52:59,440
Speaker 7: and the girl behind the counter where we were just vibing,

901
00:53:00,239 --> 00:53:02,880
Speaker 7: and I really wanted to ask for a number. I

902
00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:05,600
Speaker 7: was thinking it. There was no one else there, and

903
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:09,200
Speaker 7: I was so close, and then I just didn't do it.

904
00:53:09,400 --> 00:53:12,200
Speaker 7: And then I just walked out, and I just was like, fuck.

905
00:53:14,680 --> 00:53:15,120
Speaker 3: A hard.

906
00:53:15,800 --> 00:53:18,719
Speaker 1: But I didn't see that's such. That is a tough

907
00:53:18,880 --> 00:53:21,760
Speaker 1: scenario because you want to be respectful of the fact

908
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:23,520
Speaker 1: that she's working, and shit.

909
00:53:24,000 --> 00:53:27,000
Speaker 10: There's a plot twist when I didn't. I don't sugar

910
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:30,000
Speaker 10: baby anymore. But I've been a sugar baby to a

911
00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:32,720
Speaker 10: lot of guys who are really awkward, and I always

912
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:35,799
Speaker 10: got lucky with my sugar daddy's being guys who are

913
00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:38,560
Speaker 10: just twenty six, twenty seven, Like they weren't old guys.

914
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:41,359
Speaker 10: They were always just guys of weird, insecure handouts and

915
00:53:41,400 --> 00:53:45,200
Speaker 10: lots of anxiety, and they practiced on me how to

916
00:53:45,239 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 10: talk to girls like I and I would just unabashedly

917
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:50,600
Speaker 10: say like you're being really weird or like hey, like

918
00:53:50,680 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 10: you need that is not how you go down good

919
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:55,279
Speaker 10: to have that feedback that we had actually like great

920
00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:58,919
Speaker 10: feedback loops on like hey, like you know, like maybe

921
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:01,239
Speaker 10: you should read this book or or something. And even

922
00:54:01,320 --> 00:54:03,239
Speaker 10: on my only fans to this day, I feel like

923
00:54:03,320 --> 00:54:05,879
Speaker 10: I help practice. I help men practice how to talk.

924
00:54:06,040 --> 00:54:08,439
Speaker 10: I'm a real woman, but how to talk to women

925
00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:11,480
Speaker 10: in their lives and realize I'm not that much different

926
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:13,319
Speaker 10: than y'all. You know, it's like you want to talk

927
00:54:13,360 --> 00:54:15,799
Speaker 10: to me like a person. When I'm in public, the

928
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:18,759
Speaker 10: best way a guy talks to me is not really

929
00:54:18,800 --> 00:54:21,440
Speaker 10: by introducing themselves and saying, hey, I'm lile to get go,

930
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:25,319
Speaker 10: but kind of like just talking about the situation at hand,

931
00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:29,400
Speaker 10: like whoa, Like this line's taking forever, huh, crack a joke.

932
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:33,719
Speaker 10: You know, you're just segueing yourself in there, and that

933
00:54:33,760 --> 00:54:36,880
Speaker 10: way it feels natural and not like you're a freaking predator.

934
00:54:38,360 --> 00:54:43,760
Speaker 10: You know what I mean.

935
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:45,600
Speaker 1: When you say that your anxiety takes over. What does

936
00:54:45,640 --> 00:54:47,600
Speaker 1: that like look like? What do you mean by that?

937
00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:52,919
Speaker 5: I guess.

938
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:58,319
Speaker 7: I really just start second guessing myself a lot, and

939
00:54:58,360 --> 00:54:59,080
Speaker 7: I almost.

940
00:54:58,800 --> 00:54:59,600
Speaker 2: Just get scared.

941
00:54:59,640 --> 00:55:02,160
Speaker 7: I feel like I'm just scared to ask for their number.

942
00:55:02,920 --> 00:55:04,400
Speaker 10: Do you have a little female friends?

943
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 7: I don't know, because honestly, since I've moved up to

944
00:55:10,719 --> 00:55:13,720
Speaker 7: where I moved to for school and everything, I honestly

945
00:55:13,760 --> 00:55:15,320
Speaker 7: have like no friends right now.

946
00:55:17,120 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 10: I would practice before looking for I wouldn't say a mate.

947
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:23,719
Speaker 10: I would practice on working on yourself so that way

948
00:55:23,719 --> 00:55:27,120
Speaker 10: you're an attractive person both two men and women that

949
00:55:27,160 --> 00:55:29,000
Speaker 10: they want to hang out with you. And then when

950
00:55:29,040 --> 00:55:33,240
Speaker 10: you practice human connections like that, people of all genders

951
00:55:33,280 --> 00:55:34,920
Speaker 10: will be attracted to you, both as a friend and

952
00:55:34,960 --> 00:55:43,719
Speaker 10: both sexually and romantically. Okay, because I think it'd be

953
00:55:43,719 --> 00:55:47,440
Speaker 10: hard to have a girlfriend if you have no friends, Yeah,

954
00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:48,120
Speaker 10: I agree.

955
00:55:48,280 --> 00:55:50,279
Speaker 7: Yeah, And I'm not even going into it with like

956
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:54,080
Speaker 7: really looking for I'm not even going into it really

957
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:56,600
Speaker 7: looking for a girlfriend. Like I am almost going into

958
00:55:56,600 --> 00:56:00,680
Speaker 7: it just looking for friends almost. And I just started.

959
00:56:00,719 --> 00:56:02,520
Speaker 7: I just moved up here like two weeks ago, so

960
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:05,319
Speaker 7: I haven't had too many chances to go out, but

961
00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:08,839
Speaker 7: like I've thought about going to like bars by myself.

962
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:10,560
Speaker 7: But like at the end of the day, like talk

963
00:56:10,640 --> 00:56:12,880
Speaker 7: myself out of it. I end up just getting high,

964
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:16,200
Speaker 7: sitting in my room and watching Gecko on the TV.

965
00:56:17,760 --> 00:56:20,840
Speaker 10: Yeah, do you have a Gecko addiction? Are you a addiction?

966
00:56:22,120 --> 00:56:25,160
Speaker 1: I will ban you from my child gecko addiction?

967
00:56:26,719 --> 00:56:27,760
Speaker 7: Oh please don't Gecko.

968
00:56:28,160 --> 00:56:30,879
Speaker 1: I won't ban you from from listen. If you want

969
00:56:30,880 --> 00:56:32,279
Speaker 1: me to less, if you want me to help to you,

970
00:56:32,320 --> 00:56:33,680
Speaker 1: I would addiction.

971
00:56:35,080 --> 00:56:36,560
Speaker 7: No, no, no, no, no, don't don't ban me.

972
00:56:38,880 --> 00:56:39,080
Speaker 8: Funk.

973
00:56:39,160 --> 00:56:41,319
Speaker 1: I was gonna say something good to you. Oh oh,

974
00:56:41,360 --> 00:56:44,960
Speaker 1: the whole going out to bars by yourself thingird? Okay, well,

975
00:56:44,960 --> 00:56:48,160
Speaker 1: hold on. I think the fact that it's kind of

976
00:56:48,200 --> 00:56:50,960
Speaker 1: weird is what is compelling about it, because it's like,

977
00:56:51,040 --> 00:56:54,040
Speaker 1: can you put yourself in like an uncomfortable situation and

978
00:56:54,080 --> 00:56:56,360
Speaker 1: be okay. I don't know if that's it's that's like

979
00:56:56,400 --> 00:56:58,759
Speaker 1: a difficult thing to do, to go up to put

980
00:56:58,800 --> 00:57:02,320
Speaker 1: to a bar by yourself, I think.

981
00:57:03,040 --> 00:57:06,960
Speaker 10: Or friends, it's hard when there's nothing I can see

982
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:09,960
Speaker 10: that can relate us to one another, you know, Like

983
00:57:10,080 --> 00:57:13,719
Speaker 10: I it's easy when I'm in social situations like a

984
00:57:13,800 --> 00:57:16,240
Speaker 10: school club, like if we're both in chess club, or

985
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:18,880
Speaker 10: we're both in a sport, or for both in class

986
00:57:18,920 --> 00:57:21,320
Speaker 10: and we have a common interest in a common some

987
00:57:21,440 --> 00:57:24,919
Speaker 10: type of commonality to have a conversation about before we

988
00:57:25,040 --> 00:57:29,040
Speaker 10: get deeper with one another. But I feel like sometimes

989
00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:31,400
Speaker 10: like bars and clubs can be difficult because I have

990
00:57:31,480 --> 00:57:35,680
Speaker 10: no idea what we have in common, and and sometimes

991
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:38,640
Speaker 10: it's it feels like, Okay, you're just trying to have

992
00:57:38,720 --> 00:57:40,600
Speaker 10: sex with me, so I just want to go away.

993
00:57:41,720 --> 00:57:45,040
Speaker 10: But that's like, as a woman speaking speaking on that,

994
00:57:45,600 --> 00:57:48,000
Speaker 10: I think your best bet and like finding friends would

995
00:57:48,040 --> 00:57:51,360
Speaker 10: be like you know, like joining a club and like

996
00:57:52,160 --> 00:57:55,400
Speaker 10: you know, becoming contributing to your community in like a

997
00:57:55,440 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 10: fulfilling way.

998
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:02,880
Speaker 2: Okay, else to say?

999
00:58:05,200 --> 00:58:06,800
Speaker 1: Is there anything you want to say to the people

1000
00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:10,240
Speaker 1: of the computer or to me, or to Kazumi or

1001
00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:11,720
Speaker 1: to Miles Davis before we go?

1002
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:15,040
Speaker 10: Who's Miles Davis? Uh?

1003
00:58:15,360 --> 00:58:16,400
Speaker 2: Who is Miles Davis?

1004
00:58:16,480 --> 00:58:17,240
Speaker 7: I love you both.

1005
00:58:17,720 --> 00:58:20,560
Speaker 2: If anyone in the chat gets the opportunities, definitely do

1006
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:21,880
Speaker 2: some mushrooms in your.

1007
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:23,080
Speaker 3: Life, dude.

1008
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:25,320
Speaker 1: Shrims are the best take care of tenn.

1009
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:27,240
Speaker 7: I love shrims.

1010
00:58:27,800 --> 00:58:30,760
Speaker 10: I love you, Bye bye, I love you. I had

1011
00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:33,960
Speaker 10: a shroom trip where I experienced an ego death probably

1012
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:37,120
Speaker 10: two years ago, and it made me a way cooler person.

1013
00:58:37,480 --> 00:58:42,439
Speaker 10: And people have recommended ayah juska or whatever ayahuasca ayahuasca

1014
00:58:42,440 --> 00:58:44,680
Speaker 10: to me, but I'm afraid to see more of myself.

1015
00:58:44,680 --> 00:58:46,200
Speaker 10: I think I'm really happy with where I am.

1016
00:58:46,720 --> 00:58:48,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think still relatable.

1017
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:51,440
Speaker 10: That's the thing. Yeah, I'm weird as fuck and I

1018
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:54,200
Speaker 10: have weird opinions, but I'm still relatable and grounded. I

1019
00:58:54,200 --> 00:58:56,680
Speaker 10: feel like if I take ayahuasca, I would cross that

1020
00:58:56,760 --> 00:58:58,640
Speaker 10: threshold of like, dude, you're a weird guy.

1021
00:58:58,800 --> 00:59:00,320
Speaker 1: What's your weirdestinion?

1022
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:06,600
Speaker 10: I think my weirdest opinion is honestly, anything between consenting adults.

1023
00:59:07,240 --> 00:59:08,280
Speaker 10: Is there a business?

1024
00:59:08,840 --> 00:59:12,000
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah? Is Why do you feel like that's a

1025
00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:12,640
Speaker 1: weird opinion.

1026
00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:19,520
Speaker 10: I think it's weird because people will decide for people

1027
00:59:19,600 --> 00:59:24,200
Speaker 10: have a hard time distinguishing Hey, I wouldn't personally do

1028
00:59:24,320 --> 00:59:29,240
Speaker 10: that versus hey, someone is doing this thing, yes, you know, Like, okay,

1029
00:59:29,320 --> 00:59:33,040
Speaker 10: I personally going back to scat porn. I personally wouldn't

1030
00:59:33,040 --> 00:59:36,320
Speaker 10: shit on myself on camera right and record it. But

1031
00:59:36,480 --> 00:59:39,120
Speaker 10: I don't really care if you do. That's gotten fucking

1032
00:59:39,400 --> 00:59:42,080
Speaker 10: nothing to do with me if it's not hurting you, right.

1033
00:59:42,600 --> 00:59:46,320
Speaker 1: It's where I feel like I've been thinking about this.

1034
00:59:46,840 --> 00:59:51,520
Speaker 1: I do feel like most people operate under the idea

1035
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:54,440
Speaker 1: that you should be able to do whatever you want

1036
00:59:54,480 --> 00:59:59,360
Speaker 1: in life until you infringe upon somebody else's ability to

1037
00:59:59,360 --> 01:00:01,640
Speaker 1: do whatever they want in life. And where they really

1038
01:00:01,680 --> 01:00:07,520
Speaker 1: differ is whether or not something is uh, you know,

1039
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:10,280
Speaker 1: affecting their life that somebody else is doing.

1040
01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:13,000
Speaker 10: Yeah, I feel like the Internet were innundated with everyone's

1041
01:00:13,000 --> 01:00:15,440
Speaker 10: opinions or becoming a meme, which used to be my

1042
01:00:15,480 --> 01:00:17,280
Speaker 10: worst fear. My worst fear.

1043
01:00:18,120 --> 01:00:19,960
Speaker 1: You were afraid of becoming a meme.

1044
01:00:20,040 --> 01:00:22,160
Speaker 10: I was afraid of becoming I'm now I'm a total

1045
01:00:22,200 --> 01:00:22,720
Speaker 10: meme bro.

1046
01:00:22,960 --> 01:00:24,840
Speaker 1: But like, why is why were you afraid of becoming

1047
01:00:24,880 --> 01:00:25,200
Speaker 1: a meme?

1048
01:00:25,320 --> 01:00:28,360
Speaker 10: Okay, here's the first meme that ever was of me.

1049
01:00:28,880 --> 01:00:30,720
Speaker 10: If we're gonna talk the semantics of a meme. A

1050
01:00:30,760 --> 01:00:34,120
Speaker 10: meme is a is a a cultural thing. It can

1051
01:00:34,160 --> 01:00:37,720
Speaker 10: be a form of video or sound or or text

1052
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:40,919
Speaker 10: that is shared amongst the community, almost as an inside joke,

1053
01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:47,200
Speaker 10: something that bonds people as you know, a cultural representative

1054
01:00:47,240 --> 01:00:50,240
Speaker 10: of something. So the first meme of myself that was

1055
01:00:50,280 --> 01:00:53,640
Speaker 10: ever created was me going to a pool party and

1056
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:59,160
Speaker 10: there was just a lot of guys there and they

1057
01:00:59,560 --> 01:01:03,600
Speaker 10: said something like Hey, who's next? And I raised my hand.

1058
01:01:03,640 --> 01:01:06,040
Speaker 10: I was like me, and they picked me up. They

1059
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:08,560
Speaker 10: threw me on the lawn and I sucked all their dicks.

1060
01:01:08,720 --> 01:01:10,560
Speaker 10: It was a lot of ptises.

1061
01:01:12,000 --> 01:01:12,960
Speaker 1: How is that a meme?

1062
01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:16,360
Speaker 10: No? No, so I'll tell you. So I look up

1063
01:01:16,600 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 10: and people were recording it. And at the time I

1064
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:22,080
Speaker 10: had a normal office girl job, so I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

1065
01:01:22,160 --> 01:01:25,360
Speaker 10: I did not consent to being recorded to sucking fifty dicks.

1066
01:01:25,400 --> 01:01:27,600
Speaker 10: Not fucking cool. I was on an OnlyFans girl. I

1067
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:31,200
Speaker 10: was not doing a porn girl lo and behold on Twitter,

1068
01:01:31,560 --> 01:01:35,320
Speaker 10: someone posts a video and says something like, these Valley

1069
01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:40,800
Speaker 10: girls are something else barf emoji. It got retweeted, quote retweeted,

1070
01:01:41,080 --> 01:01:42,400
Speaker 10: hundreds of thousands of views.

1071
01:01:42,520 --> 01:01:44,800
Speaker 1: Wait wait, so somebody wrote that these Valley girls something

1072
01:01:44,800 --> 01:01:48,320
Speaker 1: else bar over over a video of you sucking fifty dicks.

1073
01:01:48,440 --> 01:01:50,000
Speaker 10: I wouldn't say fifty, but it was like a just

1074
01:01:50,160 --> 01:01:53,280
Speaker 10: like an ex well, yeah, several dicks, And so it

1075
01:01:53,320 --> 01:01:55,200
Speaker 10: became this me. First of all, I'm not from the

1076
01:01:55,240 --> 01:02:00,520
Speaker 10: fucking Valley. I'm from northeast LA. But it was a

1077
01:02:00,560 --> 01:02:03,680
Speaker 10: meme and when I went to work, everyone saw it,

1078
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:07,120
Speaker 10: and everyone talked about it, and it was like my nightmare.

1079
01:02:07,280 --> 01:02:08,760
Speaker 10: I did not want to be known for that. I

1080
01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 10: did not want to be condensed into an easily digestible,

1081
01:02:12,520 --> 01:02:16,600
Speaker 10: like one note thing. I am not from the valley,

1082
01:02:16,760 --> 01:02:18,560
Speaker 10: Like what, like.

1083
01:02:18,560 --> 01:02:20,480
Speaker 1: So, how did you overcome the how did you then

1084
01:02:20,600 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 1: start to build upon that momentum to be something more.

1085
01:02:23,840 --> 01:02:25,600
Speaker 10: A lot of my people on my work knew about

1086
01:02:25,600 --> 01:02:27,680
Speaker 10: it and had seen this video. Also, I'm not cute

1087
01:02:27,680 --> 01:02:31,400
Speaker 10: in this video. I mean I've been a select my

1088
01:02:31,440 --> 01:02:33,200
Speaker 10: whole life, Like people have shaved me and told me

1089
01:02:33,240 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 10: to go die in a ditch over liking sucking dick

1090
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:38,520
Speaker 10: all the time. But I mean, your mom got cream pie.

1091
01:02:38,560 --> 01:02:44,080
Speaker 10: We're all full grown. I don't fucking care if you

1092
01:02:44,120 --> 01:02:47,960
Speaker 10: think it's gross. I didn't die. And like, I feel

1093
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:51,000
Speaker 10: like people get offended over seeing content like that because

1094
01:02:51,040 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 10: they see themselves in it, and they see that my

1095
01:02:53,520 --> 01:02:56,600
Speaker 10: joy in it is a reflection of like, hey, like

1096
01:02:56,680 --> 01:02:58,520
Speaker 10: this is how to like look look at what the

1097
01:02:58,560 --> 01:03:01,560
Speaker 10: world's become. If we're coming to this type of hedonism,

1098
01:03:01,640 --> 01:03:04,160
Speaker 10: I don't want to identify that. I'm scared of the

1099
01:03:04,200 --> 01:03:08,240
Speaker 10: world if we accept behavior like this. And I'm like, dude,

1100
01:03:08,360 --> 01:03:11,720
Speaker 10: I am not fucking president I am. I'm not the

1101
01:03:11,760 --> 01:03:15,800
Speaker 10: representative of sluts everywhere. I just sucked dick. It's my right, God,

1102
01:03:16,320 --> 01:03:18,880
Speaker 10: and it became a meme. But I was really good

1103
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:22,560
Speaker 10: at my job, so it didn't matter. So swag.

1104
01:03:24,760 --> 01:03:27,600
Speaker 1: You feel like people see themselves in it. I wonder

1105
01:03:27,600 --> 01:03:28,680
Speaker 1: that too, because I really I.

1106
01:03:31,120 --> 01:03:33,560
Speaker 10: My biggest meme ever was when I went on a

1107
01:03:33,600 --> 01:03:35,600
Speaker 10: jumper and I talked about fucking those fifty guys and

1108
01:03:35,680 --> 01:03:38,240
Speaker 10: how I had a body count of one million bill jillion,

1109
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:42,439
Speaker 10: and people got really mad. And at first you'd think,

1110
01:03:42,640 --> 01:03:45,360
Speaker 10: why is anyone mad over a gang bang? Shouldn't everyone

1111
01:03:45,400 --> 01:03:47,960
Speaker 10: be happy? That means I got love for everybody. I've

1112
01:03:48,000 --> 01:03:50,200
Speaker 10: never been mean to a guy ever. I love men,

1113
01:03:50,640 --> 01:03:52,600
Speaker 10: and like I love like my fans and I have

1114
01:03:52,640 --> 01:03:54,560
Speaker 10: a discord and I'm nice to them. I've like never

1115
01:03:54,640 --> 01:03:58,840
Speaker 10: even like been a dickhead to a guy. But I

1116
01:03:58,880 --> 01:04:00,920
Speaker 10: feel like people see it and they see it as

1117
01:04:00,920 --> 01:04:04,800
Speaker 10: a representative of like woman. They're like, oh, look, what

1118
01:04:05,480 --> 01:04:07,560
Speaker 10: if this girl is successful and happy? What does that

1119
01:04:07,680 --> 01:04:08,760
Speaker 10: mean for the common girl?

1120
01:04:09,120 --> 01:04:09,240
Speaker 1: Right?

1121
01:04:09,320 --> 01:04:13,000
Speaker 10: If she exists and she's successful, does that mean that

1122
01:04:13,040 --> 01:04:15,640
Speaker 10: all girls everywhere are gonna get gang bank? Like my

1123
01:04:15,720 --> 01:04:17,000
Speaker 10: wife is gonna get gang bank.

1124
01:04:17,040 --> 01:04:19,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, it's well I hate when that because

1125
01:04:19,840 --> 01:04:21,440
Speaker 1: there's different people want different things.

1126
01:04:21,560 --> 01:04:24,280
Speaker 10: Yeah, Like you're the person you're dating doesn't have to

1127
01:04:24,280 --> 01:04:26,520
Speaker 10: be a gang bank queen like what like you you

1128
01:04:26,560 --> 01:04:28,840
Speaker 10: will attract exactly what you are. And if you're a

1129
01:04:28,880 --> 01:04:32,040
Speaker 10: guy who's a one woman type of guide and you're

1130
01:04:32,080 --> 01:04:34,720
Speaker 10: gonna hopefully attract a girl that's a one guy type

1131
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:35,240
Speaker 10: of right.

1132
01:04:35,280 --> 01:04:38,439
Speaker 1: It's like the people who want to like do their thing,

1133
01:04:38,520 --> 01:04:40,600
Speaker 1: do their thing. The people who want to gang bank

1134
01:04:40,640 --> 01:04:40,840
Speaker 1: do that.

1135
01:04:43,120 --> 01:04:46,000
Speaker 10: Think the world is smaller even though it's way bigger.

1136
01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:49,120
Speaker 10: Like for example, like I've been in a lot of

1137
01:04:49,160 --> 01:04:52,800
Speaker 10: media affiliated with Andrew Tate in his community, but honestly,

1138
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:55,760
Speaker 10: in real life, I've never really met those people. I

1139
01:04:55,760 --> 01:04:59,040
Speaker 10: don't surround myself with those people for entertainment purposes. The

1140
01:04:59,080 --> 01:05:01,720
Speaker 10: controversy and the je position is great views, and that's

1141
01:05:01,760 --> 01:05:04,479
Speaker 10: why we we collaborate with together together. But that's something

1142
01:05:04,520 --> 01:05:07,720
Speaker 10: we consciously do because we know it creates discussion, and

1143
01:05:07,760 --> 01:05:08,560
Speaker 10: that's how we created.

1144
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:11,200
Speaker 1: Meme memes are crazy.

1145
01:05:11,240 --> 01:05:12,680
Speaker 10: Memes are memes are propaganda.

1146
01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:14,960
Speaker 1: Memes. Memes are a little propaganda.

1147
01:05:15,080 --> 01:05:19,120
Speaker 10: Memes are propaganda, and I there was a realization sometime

1148
01:05:19,200 --> 01:05:21,560
Speaker 10: last year when I realized that liking me wasn't cool.

1149
01:05:21,880 --> 01:05:25,240
Speaker 10: So I decided to Yeah, because like people were like, ew,

1150
01:05:25,440 --> 01:05:28,640
Speaker 10: I hate this tree who doesn't shower, And I realized

1151
01:05:28,640 --> 01:05:31,600
Speaker 10: I had to make Kazumi a cool thing. And I

1152
01:05:31,640 --> 01:05:35,160
Speaker 10: think it's finally becoming cool. I'm a gecko. I made it.

1153
01:05:35,320 --> 01:05:37,440
Speaker 10: I got my blue track. Life is good.

1154
01:05:37,760 --> 01:05:40,480
Speaker 1: Why do you think it was not cool to like you?

1155
01:05:41,320 --> 01:05:43,440
Speaker 10: I was in I was affiliated with a lot of

1156
01:05:43,480 --> 01:05:46,960
Speaker 10: media that, although made me a lot of money, because

1157
01:05:46,960 --> 01:05:50,160
Speaker 10: it was so false, like it was controversial. Yeah, it

1158
01:05:50,160 --> 01:05:52,560
Speaker 10: was controversial. It got a lot of views and it

1159
01:05:52,680 --> 01:05:56,640
Speaker 10: created and I was outsourcing my audience to people that

1160
01:05:56,800 --> 01:05:59,880
Speaker 10: definitely didn't agree with people like me. I had to.

1161
01:06:00,320 --> 01:06:02,200
Speaker 10: I had to change my image and clean it up

1162
01:06:02,240 --> 01:06:05,320
Speaker 10: so that way people would kind of get where I'm

1163
01:06:05,320 --> 01:06:07,200
Speaker 10: coming from. Like, I never want to let go of

1164
01:06:07,240 --> 01:06:09,560
Speaker 10: the fact that I'm a slutty, dirty girl. That is

1165
01:06:09,600 --> 01:06:11,760
Speaker 10: not something that I want to kill or even a race.

1166
01:06:11,920 --> 01:06:14,760
Speaker 10: It's something that I want to show can still exist

1167
01:06:14,760 --> 01:06:17,880
Speaker 10: while being a multifaceted human being with a lot of opinions.

1168
01:06:17,960 --> 01:06:22,040
Speaker 1: Well, I strongly agree with the idea that no one

1169
01:06:22,120 --> 01:06:23,800
Speaker 1: part of yourself defines any other.

1170
01:06:23,720 --> 01:06:28,400
Speaker 10: Part of Yeah, like I freaking am as normal as

1171
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:31,240
Speaker 10: apple pot. You know, like I'm a pretty normal girl.

1172
01:06:31,280 --> 01:06:33,280
Speaker 10: I like, you know, I love Shrek. I like dress

1173
01:06:33,360 --> 01:06:36,040
Speaker 10: from my Gecko costume. I eat three crunchy rolls.

1174
01:06:36,360 --> 01:06:38,640
Speaker 1: You know, I'm to feel more connected to Shrek by

1175
01:06:38,680 --> 01:06:40,040
Speaker 1: being green and being green.

1176
01:06:40,920 --> 01:06:41,120
Speaker 5: You know.

1177
01:06:41,160 --> 01:06:43,360
Speaker 10: My first party I ever threw was a Shrek party.

1178
01:06:43,480 --> 01:06:46,720
Speaker 10: Really had that also sex, No, No, this was I

1179
01:06:46,800 --> 01:06:49,520
Speaker 10: just liked Shrek. We had like green mac and cheese

1180
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:51,120
Speaker 10: to represent his ears, and we had a lot of

1181
01:06:51,160 --> 01:06:55,040
Speaker 10: onion rings and we watched Shreks one, two, three, Puss

1182
01:06:55,040 --> 01:06:59,200
Speaker 10: in Boots and Shrek the Musical and Billie Eilish's brother

1183
01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:00,400
Speaker 10: phineas there.

1184
01:07:00,840 --> 01:07:02,000
Speaker 1: This was like a This must have been like a

1185
01:07:02,000 --> 01:07:03,040
Speaker 1: seven hour long party.

1186
01:07:03,120 --> 01:07:05,480
Speaker 10: This was a really long party that started at eleven

1187
01:07:05,520 --> 01:07:07,880
Speaker 10: am and was done by like eight.

1188
01:07:08,200 --> 01:07:11,680
Speaker 1: Literally, Get goes on the line making his phone calls

1189
01:07:11,760 --> 01:07:12,320
Speaker 1: every night.

1190
01:07:12,840 --> 01:07:14,560
Speaker 3: Mraphy, Get goes to on his ride.

1191
01:07:14,680 --> 01:07:16,840
Speaker 10: He's teaching you a loud in the lid of your life,

1192
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:19,360
Speaker 10: but he's not really an expert.