Speaker 1: Hi, listeners, welcome back. I'm Needrick Glover to wib and
Speaker 1: you need to hear this. I remember my grandmother past gosh.
Speaker 1: I must have been in fourth grade, and her loss
Speaker 1: in the family created so many shifts and relationships. It's
Speaker 1: often alarming how much someone is the glue and we
Speaker 1: not know it. Before that grandmother passed. That was, you know,
Speaker 1: my mom's mom. My father's mom died a few years
Speaker 1: before that. And I hear people saying how much things
Speaker 1: were never the same. These relationships were almost maintained or
Speaker 1: buffered by this other person being there. I have a
Speaker 1: really funny memory, We'll not funny, but a really interesting
Speaker 1: memory around this time. So my family is from Tuskegee, Alabama,
Speaker 1: and when my grandmother passed, we went from Detroit to
Speaker 1: tusky Yee, Alabama for her funeral service, and my grandfather
Speaker 1: was there. And I swear to you, mind you, I'm
Speaker 1: like in fourth grade. It felt like the first time
Speaker 1: meeting my grandfather. I don't even remember him before this point.
Speaker 1: Now you're talking about a person who spent summers in Alabama,
Speaker 1: whose grandparents would come visit. But it was like I
Speaker 1: had no recollection of his personality. Because my grandmother was
Speaker 1: this figure that really owned the space, the person that
Speaker 1: I had like this relationship with, and when she left,
Speaker 1: it was like, oh my gosh, like there's someone else
Speaker 1: who lives here. How didn't I notice this? I mean,
Speaker 1: it seems so weird to be able to have such
Speaker 1: a powerful figure in our life and our families that
Speaker 1: when this person passes away, we start to, you know,
Speaker 1: maybe notice other relationships or even pull away from those
Speaker 1: relationships because they created like this buffering effect, or they
Speaker 1: brought everyone together. They help minimize or you know, whatever
Speaker 1: that thing is. And I would say that many many
Speaker 1: years later, my family feels the impact of my grandmother's
Speaker 1: you know, on my father's side, and a grandmother on
Speaker 1: my mother's side not being in those families because the
Speaker 1: relationships were impacted in a way that the people who
Speaker 1: were left behind we just haven't been able to recover.
Speaker 1: We didn't have the tools, we didn't have the skills.
Speaker 1: And so, you know, in some ways, how wonderful, you know,
Speaker 1: to have that person who had this this spirit, who
Speaker 1: was able to be a connector. But also how sad
Speaker 1: that we no longer have that force in our lives
Speaker 1: to be able to make sense of these other relationships
Speaker 1: for us. Now, this story didn't come out of the blue.
Speaker 1: In today's letter, we will be talking to a caller
Speaker 1: who is experiencing the loss of their father and still
Speaker 1: in relationship with their mother. And as they're in this relationship,
Speaker 1: it's not like these problems are new, but you know,
Speaker 1: we start to notice people or notice them more because
Speaker 1: this other person is absent. So you know, as I
Speaker 1: mentioned earlier, some people leave such a significant space that
Speaker 1: it really impacts those other relationships. So let's start listening
Speaker 1: to today's letter.
Speaker 2: Dear missus Dewob, My father recently passed away less than
Speaker 2: one year ago. He did everything for my mother, who
Speaker 2: stayed at home for the entire course of their marriage.
Speaker 2: They were married for almost forty five years and my
Speaker 2: father managed everything in the household short of daily chores.
Speaker 2: He was sick for the extended period of time, and
Speaker 2: my mother bore the brunt dealing with my father's illness.
Speaker 2: I am an only child, so since his passing, I
Speaker 2: have been helping as much as I can with helping
Speaker 2: her with technology and taking ownership of doing all the things,
Speaker 2: and have been intentional to call her every day and
Speaker 2: give her opportunities to participate in activities with me and
Speaker 2: my son. Even before my father got sick, my mother
Speaker 2: has always been judgmental and sort of limited in her
Speaker 2: worldview without getting too political, she is very left and
Speaker 2: often makes comments about those with other viewpoints. She also,
Speaker 2: since I was a young girl, has said comments related
Speaker 2: to my body image and lifestyle that have been triggering,
Speaker 2: as this generation might call it. She routinely says things
Speaker 2: that really get under my skin. When my dad was around,
Speaker 2: I was able to limit my time with her and
Speaker 2: situations that involve a lot of sharing. Now that my
Speaker 2: father is gone, I find it hard to set boundaries
Speaker 2: with her. I feel sort of guilty that I do
Speaker 2: not want to spend a lot of time with her.
Speaker 2: But at the same time, she routinely makes comments about
Speaker 2: my wait, household, or political comments that are hurtful or confrontational.
Speaker 1: In our relationships with others, as we are doing what
Speaker 1: we think is required, we have to wonder is this
Speaker 1: even necessary? Have we been, you know, maybe directly or
Speaker 1: in some informal way, asks can you give me a
Speaker 1: call every day? Because you know, maybe we feel like
Speaker 1: that's what I should do. As the only child, that's
Speaker 1: what my mother's expectation is. But has that been stated.
Speaker 1: Is it actually a need for you to do that thing?
Speaker 1: We can show up and be really healthy with others
Speaker 1: when we're doing so out of love and not out
Speaker 1: of obligation. So I just wonder what feels comfortable. Perhaps
Speaker 1: comfortable is talking every other day, talking once a week.
Speaker 1: But I tell you what, talking to people who, as
Speaker 1: you say, trigger you daily, that is going to cause
Speaker 1: a lot of mental and emotional issues. So is there
Speaker 1: a space for us to be in relationship with people?
Speaker 1: But maybe not as much as we think we have
Speaker 1: to be. Maybe there's some room for choice. I was
Speaker 1: recently talking to someone who was, you know, sharing how
Speaker 1: much their parent complains about health issues and other family
Speaker 1: members and being unhappy. And at the end of it,
Speaker 1: I said, well, who calls who? And they said, well,
Speaker 1: I call them? And I said, you call a person
Speaker 1: to be complained to every day. It sounds like you
Speaker 1: have some choice in the matter. It's not hey, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to talk to this person because they're always complaining.
Speaker 1: But you might not want to initiate a conversation where
Speaker 1: there's planning. It might look like, you know, maybe I'll
Speaker 1: just pull back a little bit. Maybe I'll shift the
Speaker 1: tone of the conversation by starting with a topic and
Speaker 1: not waiting for them to come in with their stuff.
Speaker 1: You know, sometimes asking a person how you're doing invites
Speaker 1: a certain type of conversation that might be a question
Speaker 1: that you want to shy away from. You know, even
Speaker 1: asking your mother have you watched the news? That could
Speaker 1: be an invitation for her to talk about politics, saying
Speaker 1: things like, oh, my gosh, you know any any sort
Speaker 1: of thing it's it's so such and such outside. If
Speaker 1: you notice that these are like trigger phrases or scenarios
Speaker 1: where she really gets into and yes, so the president.
Speaker 1: You know, if she takes it back there with certain things,
Speaker 1: you may have to figure out some new things to
Speaker 1: talk about, so you're not inviting that sort of conversation
Speaker 1: with your mom. What sort of things create the most
Speaker 1: minimal amount of conflict and conversation maybe make a little
Speaker 1: less when we talk about these things. This typically goes well.
Speaker 1: If I bring this up, she goes off on a
Speaker 1: path that is unbearable. So being clear about these are
Speaker 1: topics I can talk about, and these are topics that
Speaker 1: I need to shy away from could be very helpful
Speaker 1: when you're talking to a person who has like a
Speaker 1: topic that they like to stick to. I hear you
Speaker 1: saying when my dad was around, I was able to
Speaker 1: limit my time with her and situations that involve a
Speaker 1: lot of sharing. You know, as I mentioned in the opening,
Speaker 1: it was amazing to me that I had not even
Speaker 1: noticed my grandfather. That's how much time I was spending
Speaker 1: with my grandmother. And when I think really, really, really
Speaker 1: deeply about it, I do remember a figure before then,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't as clear as this person who I
Speaker 1: enjoyed spending time with, who you know, would pinch my
Speaker 1: little cheeks, who would give me extra little treats, and
Speaker 1: you know, all of these things like that was such
Speaker 1: a profound relationship that I was able to drown out
Speaker 1: these other scenarios. So that does happen with us that
Speaker 1: we feel this you know, strong connection who we're able
Speaker 1: to sit in these situations with the other people around
Speaker 1: and kind of ignore them. And once this figure is
Speaker 1: removed from our life, it's like we have no choice
Speaker 1: but to recognize this other person, like, oh wait, you
Speaker 1: talk this much, this is what you talk about. It
Speaker 1: can be very you know, jarring and shocking. So you know,
Speaker 1: it sounds like your mom is just able to be
Speaker 1: herself a bit more often because you don't have your
Speaker 1: father there to facilitate some of those conversations. Let's take
Speaker 1: a quick break and we'll listen when we get back.
Speaker 2: For instance, the last time I was with her, she said,
Speaker 2: I would love to help you clean your house this summer,
Speaker 2: as I know it must be overwhelming to have a
Speaker 2: kitchen with stuff on the cabinets. She also is very
Speaker 2: fortunate to not have to worry about money. My husband
Speaker 2: and I are the typical dual income household that, once
Speaker 2: bills are paid, have no savings left. When I made
Speaker 2: a comment about how even groceries are expensive, she told
Speaker 2: me that maybe I could go to a food pantry
Speaker 2: once or twice a month, as they are open to everyone.
Speaker 2: That really made me upset. I suggested she begin volunteering
Speaker 2: to fill her time, and after one day volunteering in
Speaker 2: a pantry, this was her comment to me. She also
Speaker 2: brings up my ex husband and the bad choices I made.
Speaker 2: I should note I am now in a loving marriage
Speaker 2: with an adorable, precious toddler. I must share that I
Speaker 2: work in two offices, and my husband works out of
Speaker 2: town five days a week and I have a four
Speaker 2: year old other than day. I have never had help,
Speaker 2: as my mother and father were not able or in
Speaker 2: some cases willing to assist me. I have envy of
Speaker 2: many of my mom friends who get a weekend off
Speaker 2: or have help on the weekend from their parents. If anything,
Speaker 2: having my mother around with my son is double the work.
Speaker 2: She does not jump into help at all. She routinely
Speaker 2: says how bored she is, but when I suggest opportunities
Speaker 2: for her to do things with her grandson, she's never
Speaker 2: that bored.
Speaker 1: When we have issues with a person, almost anything they
Speaker 1: say to us can be considered an annoying statement. I
Speaker 1: have found myself irritated by the smallest of things when
Speaker 1: there is already some issue with a person. I mean,
Speaker 1: it could be as do you have chapstick? It's like,
Speaker 1: are you saying my lips are chap Oh no, you're not,
Speaker 1: Like I can't believe you know. Your mind goes into
Speaker 1: this space and sometimes people are being passive aggressive. Sometimes
Speaker 1: they're trying to make a mean comment, or they're actually
Speaker 1: trying to be helpful right by saying, have you considered
Speaker 1: going to a food pantry. You know, I know that
Speaker 1: they help people who are having some financial struggles. Right,
Speaker 1: have you maybe thought about this other thing, like, perhaps
Speaker 1: if it wasn't your mom, you would be able to
Speaker 1: receive that information. Perhaps if you didn't have these challenges
Speaker 1: with her, you could hear that information and not be
Speaker 1: so offended. But because the relationship is already fragile, it's
Speaker 1: like even a belch could really throw this thing off.
Speaker 1: So being clear that you know, maybe there are some
Speaker 1: challenges in the relationship that impact me being able to
Speaker 1: hear anything from this person, And there may also be
Speaker 1: space for you to talk to your mom about the
Speaker 1: spirit in what she says thing or the language she
Speaker 1: uses to describe things. I would love to help you
Speaker 1: clean your house this summer, as I know it must
Speaker 1: be overwhelming to have a kitchen with stuff on the cabinets.
Speaker 1: You know, I think the problem in that sentence is
Speaker 1: the latter part of the sentence, right, I would love
Speaker 1: to help you clean your house this summer, as I
Speaker 1: know it must be overwhelming. Was enough to add to
Speaker 1: it to have a kitchen with stuff on the cabinets.
Speaker 1: That's the part that's like a little too much detail,
Speaker 1: so to be able to say to a person like, hey,
Speaker 1: I think I understand that you were going somewhere positive
Speaker 1: with this. You were trying to be helpful, you were
Speaker 1: trying to think of a solution for me. But this
Speaker 1: is where it became offensive when you added these other
Speaker 1: words to that already complete sentence. You added some words
Speaker 1: that were really offensive. And if you want to be hopeful,
Speaker 1: perhaps there's a way to say it. Perhaps there is
Speaker 1: a spirit in whish to communicate that you're trying to
Speaker 1: be hopeful and not harmful. I want to sit with
Speaker 1: this just a minute. You have identified that you're having
Speaker 1: some envy, and the envy is around having a mother
Speaker 1: who is present in your home but not present in
Speaker 1: that grandparenting relationship with your child. So if I just
Speaker 1: paint a picture there, she sees that you are alone
Speaker 1: for five days a week and you're parenting, and that
Speaker 1: you are trying to work and you're trying to parent,
Speaker 1: and that you're overwhelmed to the point of needing some
Speaker 1: assistance with your house. And when she comes to visit,
Speaker 1: she's just sitting there. She has nothing to do. She
Speaker 1: can't think of a pillow to fluff, a laundry, to do,
Speaker 1: a meal, to cook, or anything else. She's just watching
Speaker 1: you sort of struggle with this. I hear a bit
Speaker 1: of sadness in there to not have that expectation met.
Speaker 1: But here you are in a situation where you're highly
Speaker 1: considering her needs to be in contact. You're, oh, my gosh,
Speaker 1: I have to call her every day because she's alone
Speaker 1: and she's sitting and watching you have needs and she's
Speaker 1: unwilling to help. She's not jumping in to facilitate an
Speaker 1: easier parenting experience for you, even when you're suggesting it, Hey,
Speaker 1: here are some things you can do with your grandson.
Speaker 1: She's like, Nope, can't do that. That is challenging to
Speaker 1: watch as a parent because you're watching her impact that
Speaker 1: relationship with your grandchild, and you're also watching as she
Speaker 1: impacts the relationship with you. Because these are not things
Speaker 1: that you will forget. It sounds like these are things
Speaker 1: that you're really adding to this scenario of you know,
Speaker 1: mom is offending me. Mom is always talking about this
Speaker 1: political stuff. Mom is not helpful. Mom? Is this? Mom?
Speaker 1: Is that? Mom? Is this? Mama? Is that? Have you
Speaker 1: taken a moment to be angry? You know, A really
Speaker 1: hard thing to realize sometimes is that it can be
Speaker 1: really hard for us to realize that we are sad.
Speaker 1: We are sad about the parent in which we don't have,
Speaker 1: the parent that you have to do life with. As
Speaker 1: you watch your peers be in situations that sound more ideal,
Speaker 1: you're unable to even tap into that. There's no you know,
Speaker 1: it's one thing. If you're like, oh my gosh, this
Speaker 1: person they got a new car, and I can work
Speaker 1: really hard to get a similar car or better car,
Speaker 1: it's like, that's one thing. But when you're not able
Speaker 1: to get something like it, just it's not going to
Speaker 1: happen for you. It's not in the cards. It's not
Speaker 1: possible with this parent. That's a whole another level of grief.
Speaker 1: I want to add this to your grief. I think
Speaker 1: you're grieving more than one thing. I think you're grieving
Speaker 1: the loss of your father, and I think you are
Speaker 1: grieving the type of parent that you think you deserve
Speaker 1: versus the one that you have to be in relationship with,
Speaker 1: someone who requires something that they don't offer, or requires
Speaker 1: a certain level of care from you that you are
Speaker 1: not prepared to give. It can be really frustrating. So
Speaker 1: as I'm listening to this, and I know that you're
Speaker 1: you know, you're in this loving marriage and you have
Speaker 1: this adorable child. So I'm hearing that there is some happiness,
Speaker 1: there is some joy, there is some feeld met. But
Speaker 1: then on the other side, you have this relationship with
Speaker 1: your mom and you're still grieving the loss of your father.
Speaker 1: I wonder if you, as an only child, if you
Speaker 1: have a space to talk through some of these things,
Speaker 1: to talk about your disappointments, to talk about how hard
Speaker 1: it is to watch your mother not be a good grandparent,
Speaker 1: how hard it is to have to help your mom
Speaker 1: because you're her only person. Now, there may be some
Speaker 1: free resources for this, because I don't want you to
Speaker 1: go down a path of you have to go to
Speaker 1: therapy or you have to pay for this other service.
Speaker 1: I think there may be some resources in your area
Speaker 1: for caretakers, because that's what you are at this point.
Speaker 1: You're a caretaker. You're caring for your mom. Now, is
Speaker 1: your mom incapacitated, Is she not able to, you know,
Speaker 1: take care of herself. No, but you are doing what
Speaker 1: a caretaker does. And so I wonder if there is
Speaker 1: is a group or a support system that you can
Speaker 1: tap into to help you have some support around this issue,
Speaker 1: because it's going to be very frustrating when the only
Speaker 1: person you could talk to about this is yourself or
Speaker 1: a bunch of people who really don't understand because they're
Speaker 1: not in the same situation. As you mentioned, a lot
Speaker 1: of your mom friends, they're enjoying their weekends every once
Speaker 1: in a while, right, And so you are the person
Speaker 1: in this situation, and so I do wonder, you know,
Speaker 1: how do you find some support around this. If you
Speaker 1: can't find a group locally, there could be a Facebook
Speaker 1: group for this. There could be you know, maybe a
Speaker 1: person who you know is having this a similar situation,
Speaker 1: and those relationships don't have to all be about this,
Speaker 1: but just being able from time to time. You don't
Speaker 1: want to create a trauma bi right, where all you
Speaker 1: talk about is oh and they did this, and oh
Speaker 1: and they did that. You don't want that. But from
Speaker 1: time to time it does help to have a person
Speaker 1: who can just hold space and listen to you share
Speaker 1: about this very challenging dynamic you're in now with that
Speaker 1: grief support. You know, the situation with your mom might
Speaker 1: be a little unique, but there may be more people
Speaker 1: who've lost a parent who you can talk to about
Speaker 1: the things that you're grieving around the loss of your
Speaker 1: father and what that looks like day to day, and
Speaker 1: how you're having to show up with your mother in
Speaker 1: this new and different way. As you are moving through
Speaker 1: this relationship with your mom, you have to notice that
Speaker 1: you are now a caretaker of too. It's your four
Speaker 1: year old and it's your mom. It sounds like like you're,
Speaker 1: you know, embracing your mom as this person that you're
Speaker 1: now there for in a way, and you have to
Speaker 1: make sure that you're taking care of yourself. Caretakers need care.
Speaker 1: You cannot give what you are not giving to yourself. So,
Speaker 1: although there's this obligation to be in contact with her,
Speaker 1: war you may want to create some rituals to practice
Speaker 1: before you call and tap into her energy. You may
Speaker 1: want to create some things to do after you're in
Speaker 1: contact with her, so that you're having some separation from
Speaker 1: those events and then back to yourself and then back
Speaker 1: to your toddler. You have a lot of caring that
Speaker 1: you're doing, and so you'll have to weave in some
Speaker 1: ways to really take care of yourself. Let's listen some more.
Speaker 2: I'm also missing my father, and while feeling guilty about
Speaker 2: feeling resentful and hurt by my mother's many comments that
Speaker 2: have escalated since the passing of my father, her whole
Speaker 2: energy is anxious, sad, depressed, and I know she's going
Speaker 2: through tremendous grief, so boundary setting is tricky. Her energy
Speaker 2: dreams me completely and I dread interactions with her. Maybe
Speaker 2: I am depressed as well, but I know that when
Speaker 2: someone is toxic, limiting time can be helpful. How do
Speaker 2: I handle supporting my mother but also deal with their
Speaker 2: negativity and rude comments? Thank you?
Speaker 1: I typically don't have any tips on developing tougher skin
Speaker 1: for men behavior, and I get that a lot, like
Speaker 1: how do I accept this person saying these bad things
Speaker 1: about me? And it's like, you know, I don't know
Speaker 1: if we should be tough enough that we can withstand,
Speaker 1: you know, the punch of someone saying a mean thing. Instead,
Speaker 1: it can be really helpful, as you stated, to live
Speaker 1: in our contact. But also we have to let people
Speaker 1: know how they make us feel. And that might be
Speaker 1: as simple as saying that was a mean comment. Wow,
Speaker 1: that really hurt my feelings. It would be helpful if
Speaker 1: when you saw me doing X, Y and Z, you
Speaker 1: stood up to help me. So even calling it to
Speaker 1: her attention can feel more relieving for you, even if
Speaker 1: she doesn't do anything about it. It's not all in
Speaker 1: your head. It's not I should have done I can't
Speaker 1: believe she did this. It's like I stood up for myself.
Speaker 1: She said this thing, and I set this thing back.
Speaker 1: You know, when she said, oh, you need to go
Speaker 1: to a food bank, I had a corrective statement for
Speaker 1: her where I said, you know, although we may seem
Speaker 1: like you know, we could benefit from a food bank,
Speaker 1: we still make too much money to go there and
Speaker 1: that resource is not for us. But you know, when
Speaker 1: you make comments like that, it certainly shows that you're
Speaker 1: trying to be helpful, but it's also very hurtful with
Speaker 1: the way that you're communicating this help right, So just
Speaker 1: letting her know in these moments what's sort of happening
Speaker 1: in your head with these situations, and maybe you know
Speaker 1: it takes a few hours or a few days for
Speaker 1: you to think about it and then come back to
Speaker 1: it and say like, oh, this is how I felt
Speaker 1: about this thing. And it's okay to maybe say it later,
Speaker 1: but to say it because it sounds like you are
Speaker 1: in this grieving space together, and it's not okay to
Speaker 1: be mean to people. And so when people are being mean,
Speaker 1: it's quite okay to let them know you're being mean.
Speaker 1: That's not nice. That statement hurt my feelings. We shouldn't
Speaker 1: make excuses for them because they're anxious, sad or depressed.
Speaker 1: You know, people are always going through things, and that's
Speaker 1: not a reason to mistreat others. So even if that
Speaker 1: is the case, you can let them know how you feel. Now,
Speaker 1: I will say that with depression, one of the signs
Speaker 1: that I don't think we talk about enough is anger.
Speaker 1: You know, there are lots of folks who when they
Speaker 1: experience depression, they do become more angry, They do get moody,
Speaker 1: they are a little more aggressive, they do make mean
Speaker 1: comments because they're sad. They're sad and they're frustrated and
Speaker 1: they feel powerless and they're hopeless. I get why they
Speaker 1: do it. It doesn't make it okay. So even in
Speaker 1: a person's darkest moments, it's not okay for them to
Speaker 1: be mean to you, and I want us to stop
Speaker 1: making excuses for that by saying like, well, this person
Speaker 1: is going through X, and that's why they say Z.
Speaker 1: It's like yeah, but they can go through that and
Speaker 1: you know, maybe experience it in some other way and
Speaker 1: not impact the people who are actually trying to help them.
Speaker 1: You need to hear this. When we are doing things
Speaker 1: in our relationships and we feel like I have to,
Speaker 1: I am obligated, I must we have to ask ourselves
Speaker 1: the question of is this the person's expectation or is
Speaker 1: this my expectation. If it's the other person's expectation, you
Speaker 1: could certainly level set and say something along the lines of,
Speaker 1: you know, I want to talk to you, but it
Speaker 1: might not be every day. And even bigger than that,
Speaker 1: you can just change your behavior. You cannot call this
Speaker 1: person every single day. You can call them maybe every
Speaker 1: other day if that's what feels good, if that's a
Speaker 1: place where you can actually tolerate the conversation. When our
Speaker 1: expectation is I must do this thing, we have to
Speaker 1: wonder where does that come from? Is that coming from
Speaker 1: our culture? Is that coming from you know, maybe some
Speaker 1: hidden messaging that we receive. And if I have to
Speaker 1: do this, why does it make us feel so bad?
Speaker 1: Maybe that's an indication that we don't have to do it.
Speaker 1: If we had to do it, would it feel this bad?
Speaker 1: Is there a different way that we could show up
Speaker 1: in these relifes relationships. There's a lot of people that
Speaker 1: we can love a whole lot and maybe not want
Speaker 1: to talk to them every day. We have to be
Speaker 1: mindful of how certain people in certain conversations impact us
Speaker 1: showing up in other spaces. If I talk to this
Speaker 1: person today and they're giving me this energy, how do
Speaker 1: I show up with my four year old? If I
Speaker 1: talk to this person today and they're being mean and
Speaker 1: they make a comment and I'm crying the rest of
Speaker 1: the evening, how can I be in relationship with my
Speaker 1: husband and my friends? So those things matter too, that
Speaker 1: there is some impact on us from being mistreated. It's
Speaker 1: not like there's no impact and you feel okay. It's
Speaker 1: like you're experiencing something and you're taking that back into
Speaker 1: your life. So it would be wise to protect yourself
Speaker 1: against the impact of someone being mean. You need to hear.
Speaker 1: This is an iHeart production. Host it by me Ndra
Speaker 1: Glover towob. Our executive producer is Joel Barnique. Our senior
Speaker 1: producer and editor is Mia don Taylor. Send us a
Speaker 1: voice memo with your questions about boundaries and relationships at
Speaker 1: you need to Hear this at iHeartMedia dot com. Please
Speaker 1: be sure to rate our show wherever you listen to it,
Speaker 1: and share this episode with someone who needs to hear this.
Speaker 1: Talk to you next time.