WEBVTT - Love to All my Ladies 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.120 Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of our Heart Radio 0:00:03.240 --> 0:00:08.520 and the black effects a nice lit aspects, I still 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:20.119 a nice still And just like that, we're back on 0:00:20.200 --> 0:00:23.239 the Welcome back to another episode of Carefully Reckless with 0:00:23.320 --> 0:00:26.360 your girl just hilarious. Now Mother's Day just passed, and 0:00:26.440 --> 0:00:29.400 I want to take the time to say Happy Mother's 0:00:29.520 --> 0:00:32.120 Day to all the mothers out there, and even the 0:00:32.200 --> 0:00:34.599 ones who are not with us anymore. And it's rather 0:00:34.760 --> 0:00:37.879 ironic that I'm paying homage to moms because I want 0:00:37.920 --> 0:00:41.080 to dedicate this episode to women and how we need 0:00:41.159 --> 0:00:46.000 to be cherished, whether you're Black, Asian, Hispanic, white, whatever. 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:49.599 This is about women in general and how we need 0:00:49.680 --> 0:00:52.120 to be cherished and not taking advantage of. So I'm 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:54.040 gonna tell you a story now. This story time is 0:00:54.120 --> 0:00:56.240 kind of different because this was a story that one 0:00:56.240 --> 0:00:59.360 of my fans told me in Columbia, South Carolina, where 0:00:59.400 --> 0:01:02.040 I just play at the comedy house and it's juicy, 0:01:02.280 --> 0:01:04.440 So grab your tea in your halls because it's story 0:01:04.520 --> 0:01:09.119 time now. She told me I can say her name, 0:01:09.160 --> 0:01:10.840 but I'm not gonna say her name because I had 0:01:10.920 --> 0:01:13.520 the pleasure of meeting her in person and the pleasure 0:01:13.560 --> 0:01:16.440 of seeing her get terry eyed cried, real tear is 0:01:16.480 --> 0:01:19.120 telling me the story. But it all ended beautifully. I 0:01:19.160 --> 0:01:21.520 just want you to know that years and years ago 0:01:21.840 --> 0:01:25.039 she met this guy. She said, everything was great. Now, 0:01:25.120 --> 0:01:27.880 what's been said before. When you meet somebody and it's perfect, 0:01:28.319 --> 0:01:31.280 that's not the person that you're dating. The person that 0:01:31.360 --> 0:01:33.480 you're dating is a person that come out after the 0:01:33.560 --> 0:01:37.400 probation period, after the ninety days, maybe it's even longer 0:01:37.440 --> 0:01:39.200 than that that they can keep the act up of 0:01:39.280 --> 0:01:42.120 the representative. You actually fall in love with the person 0:01:42.400 --> 0:01:44.399 that they show you that they are the first three 0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:48.400 to four months, right, that's their representative. Then outcomes the 0:01:48.440 --> 0:01:50.960 real them, you know, or however long it may take. 0:01:51.280 --> 0:01:54.640 Everything was perfect, she said. Three years down the line 0:01:55.000 --> 0:01:57.800 they got a baby. Now, okay, after the baby is 0:01:57.800 --> 0:02:00.240 when everything went south. And she told me she don't 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:03.040 think it went south because of the baby. It just 0:02:03.240 --> 0:02:06.600 went south period, because he loves his child, loves his 0:02:06.760 --> 0:02:09.359 child all over his child to this day, you know 0:02:09.360 --> 0:02:12.160 what I'm saying, To his day, he's a great father. 0:02:12.600 --> 0:02:14.840 So it wasn't about the child at all. Let me 0:02:14.919 --> 0:02:18.840 tell you, she said. The intimacy stopped the compliments stopped 0:02:19.280 --> 0:02:22.560 gifts for holidays, stopped. I said, did he become a 0:02:22.639 --> 0:02:26.480 Jehovah's witness? She said, no, everything just kind of stopped. Now. 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:29.360 He didn't become a bum. He kept working, always had 0:02:29.360 --> 0:02:31.600 a job, always had a ship together. You know what 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:34.720 I'm saying, car, all of that. You know, they bought 0:02:34.760 --> 0:02:37.000 a house together. When they first met, they lived separately. 0:02:37.200 --> 0:02:40.480 They bought a house together. They both worked great jobs. 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:46.960 They were doing good individually individually, but together they started falling. 0:02:47.400 --> 0:02:50.320 He wasn't making her laugh no more, he was less charming, 0:02:50.639 --> 0:02:53.280 he didn't really want to touch her. Sex didn't last 0:02:53.360 --> 0:02:56.000 that long, all of that, so she immediately thought that 0:02:56.040 --> 0:02:59.000 he was cheating. She suspected it. It never came out 0:02:59.120 --> 0:03:01.359 that he was. Of course, you do to going through 0:03:01.400 --> 0:03:04.560 the phone thing. She never found anything. Did the snoop 0:03:04.639 --> 0:03:06.959 and ship never found anything. So she was led to 0:03:07.000 --> 0:03:08.919 believe he was not cheating because she could not prove it. 0:03:09.360 --> 0:03:12.799 So she let that go. Fast forward three more years later, 0:03:13.040 --> 0:03:16.079 this is six years. They've been together now, three good 0:03:16.200 --> 0:03:20.520 years in three trying years. So she said, by this time, 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:23.840 it wasn't even I love yous and I missus, or 0:03:23.919 --> 0:03:26.480 you look beautiful. It was none of that. She had 0:03:26.520 --> 0:03:28.600 to say it first. That was the only way he 0:03:28.760 --> 0:03:31.400 was gonna say I love you or I miss you 0:03:31.760 --> 0:03:33.359 is if he was putting two on the end of it, 0:03:33.440 --> 0:03:35.560 because she said it first. So we all know how 0:03:35.640 --> 0:03:39.800 that feels. She also expressed me that she was feeling unappreciated. 0:03:39.960 --> 0:03:43.560 She was being taken for granted, like she was just there. 0:03:43.760 --> 0:03:46.480 After a while, she said, it felt like being with 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:49.960 a roommate. They were just roommates. It came down to 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:53.840 no sex her seventh year, her family had to get together. Now. 0:03:53.920 --> 0:03:56.240 He was always involved with her family, and he still 0:03:56.320 --> 0:03:59.440 went to outings with her. They just didn't interact behind 0:03:59.520 --> 0:04:01.960 closed the wars at home. They were just like two 0:04:02.040 --> 0:04:05.960 mad home girls who lived together. Never talked, didn't mingle, 0:04:06.080 --> 0:04:09.040 didn't watch TV together. I'm talking about nothing. She said. 0:04:09.080 --> 0:04:11.960 He would cook, wouldn't make her plate. He would cook 0:04:12.000 --> 0:04:14.280 because he can cook. He would cook, wouldn't make a plate. 0:04:14.320 --> 0:04:15.640 She would have to go and make her own plate. 0:04:15.680 --> 0:04:17.560 He would not sit down and eat with her like 0:04:17.720 --> 0:04:20.480 boyfriend and girlfriend, like a family. They didn't. They wouldn't 0:04:20.480 --> 0:04:23.520 do that anymore. He just started doing things by his lonesome. 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:26.680 There at the family get together. One of her cousins 0:04:26.839 --> 0:04:29.640 got proposed to not too long before they get together, 0:04:30.000 --> 0:04:33.280 so all the couples, of course, started talking about marriage 0:04:33.360 --> 0:04:37.320 and everything, and the cousin asked him, a dumb when 0:04:37.320 --> 0:04:40.360 you're gonna marry my cousin, y'all see babies, more babies 0:04:40.360 --> 0:04:43.000 in the future, and the wedding bells, she said. He 0:04:43.080 --> 0:04:48.479 shrugged his shoulders and threw his hands up, scared the funk. 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:51.440 I asked you a question, whether it's I don't see 0:04:51.480 --> 0:04:54.720 wedding bells, whether it's yes, of course I'm gonna get married, nigger, 0:04:54.800 --> 0:04:56.760 You could have lied to paint the picture instead of 0:04:56.880 --> 0:04:59.200 embarrassing her, missed them in d C. You know what 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:02.000 I'm saying, Just a little bit, be like, oh she 0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:04.599 already baby, don't do you already know when we getting 0:05:04.600 --> 0:05:06.880 married or something? Even if you have to play like 0:05:07.040 --> 0:05:10.200 that just to save her the embarrassment, you already ain't there. Mentally, 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:13.640 she'd been feeling it for four years now. She knew 0:05:13.920 --> 0:05:16.200 in that moment that was it for her. She told 0:05:16.240 --> 0:05:18.680 me that was the last night she ever wanted to 0:05:18.760 --> 0:05:20.520 be with him. That was the last night she ever 0:05:20.640 --> 0:05:22.880 wanted to pull up to the same house with him. 0:05:22.960 --> 0:05:25.120 That was the last time she ever wanted to be 0:05:25.320 --> 0:05:29.440 with that man period. She left him that night. That 0:05:29.600 --> 0:05:31.800 was two years ago. To this day, he is trying 0:05:31.920 --> 0:05:34.320 to get her back. She ain't trying to go back. 0:05:34.480 --> 0:05:36.160 She was weak at her. She even told me she 0:05:36.279 --> 0:05:39.920 went back before not knowing what our worth was. And 0:05:39.960 --> 0:05:42.200 then she had to leave again because he was good 0:05:42.560 --> 0:05:44.479 when she came back. It was like he was scared 0:05:44.520 --> 0:05:45.880 of losing her, but he didn't want to be with 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:48.279 her while he was there. That was kind of crazy. Now, 0:05:48.320 --> 0:05:50.000 I know a lot of women are going through that 0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:52.320 ship right now. Hold up, Hold up, I know the 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:54.480 ship getting good. But listen to just a couple of 0:05:54.520 --> 0:05:56.640 seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. 0:05:59.680 --> 0:06:02.800 That brings me to the carefully reckless discussion. A lot 0:06:02.880 --> 0:06:04.840 of women are going through that ship. I know it 0:06:05.040 --> 0:06:08.160 right now. If you're listening, I know you're going through it. 0:06:08.320 --> 0:06:12.279 I've been through it. You know where you feel unappreciated 0:06:12.400 --> 0:06:15.120 and most of the time you know you're worth You 0:06:15.279 --> 0:06:18.400 just don't enforce it because, for one, a lot of 0:06:18.520 --> 0:06:22.120 us have bigger hearts than we know. Our heart is big. 0:06:22.240 --> 0:06:24.800 We don't want to leave someone, we don't it's it's 0:06:24.839 --> 0:06:28.960 a lot of reasons why you stay complacent and why 0:06:29.120 --> 0:06:32.920 your relationship is stagnant and it starts to go downhill 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:35.320 because a lot of people feel like as they get 0:06:35.400 --> 0:06:36.920 up in age, they don't want to start over. A 0:06:36.960 --> 0:06:39.600 lot of people they get to the point where I 0:06:39.640 --> 0:06:41.320 don't want to start over. I got a family member 0:06:41.360 --> 0:06:43.560 going through a divorce. She was married for thirty some 0:06:43.760 --> 0:06:46.720 more years. She's in her fifties. I said, Auntie, why 0:06:46.880 --> 0:06:48.360 why I take you so long the divorce? And if 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:50.080 you knew he was cheating on you all this time? 0:06:50.200 --> 0:06:52.840 Like she said, yo for real, boo because they call 0:06:52.880 --> 0:06:55.000 me boo boo. She said, boo boo for real. I 0:06:55.120 --> 0:06:57.520 just didn't want to start over. Who the hell out 0:06:57.600 --> 0:07:00.839 here is really looking for a fifty year old? I said, 0:07:00.920 --> 0:07:03.720 maybe other fifty year olds. I don't know. Ship, you 0:07:03.800 --> 0:07:05.560 can find you a good thirty five year old if 0:07:05.600 --> 0:07:08.000 you're lucky. Ship the novelty, the war off on our 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:10.360 young asses. No nobody want the lord, young, stupid lord whole. 0:07:10.360 --> 0:07:13.040 No more. Ship. Guys need y'all. Real men are looking 0:07:13.120 --> 0:07:15.440 for y'all. You know, young niggas are looking for y'all 0:07:15.680 --> 0:07:17.480 because the young bitches ain't doing it no more. All 0:07:17.480 --> 0:07:19.680 the young bitches is about. It's some money popping pussy 0:07:19.920 --> 0:07:22.680 and that's it. According to the Internet, that's all young 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:26.640 bitches be about. We need those seasoned, rill women. We 0:07:26.760 --> 0:07:29.080 need those women that know how to treat men. And 0:07:29.200 --> 0:07:31.280 my aunt was a damn good wife to her husband. 0:07:31.400 --> 0:07:34.600 You know what I mean. Sometimes you grow past a 0:07:34.720 --> 0:07:37.920 certain point and your companion doesn't now listen, This topic 0:07:38.040 --> 0:07:41.360 is not only for relationships. That was just an example. 0:07:41.440 --> 0:07:43.720 That was story time. You may be even going through 0:07:43.760 --> 0:07:46.160 this ship with a family member, Like I had a 0:07:46.280 --> 0:07:49.280 lot of family members who I've done shipped for. You know, 0:07:49.800 --> 0:07:52.040 I wasn't appreciate it. I've done ship. I've done it. 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:54.160 I've done ship for them. I'm talking about in the 0:07:54.200 --> 0:07:57.120 midnight hour, you call me, you know I'm listening. I 0:07:57.240 --> 0:07:59.760 may be sleep, but I'm up listening. You're my cousin 0:08:00.040 --> 0:08:02.480 going through some ship. Talk to me what's up? And 0:08:02.560 --> 0:08:04.440 then when I need the same thing back from you, 0:08:05.120 --> 0:08:07.320 you ain't no where to be found, or you just 0:08:07.400 --> 0:08:09.160 think I got it all together because I'm just what 0:08:09.280 --> 0:08:11.400 the funk you mean, I'm another human being. I'm just 0:08:11.520 --> 0:08:14.480 a public figure, you know, I'm just a celebrity, you know, 0:08:14.760 --> 0:08:17.120 or I'm famous. So on, she got it all together, 0:08:17.240 --> 0:08:19.520 she got money. She good listen, I've been there and 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:23.280 even in relationships where niggas have gotten too comfortable. And no, 0:08:23.520 --> 0:08:26.400 it's not all about cheating all the time. Sometimes a 0:08:26.480 --> 0:08:30.120 guy just really may mentally be fucked up, or he 0:08:30.200 --> 0:08:33.319 may mentally check out, like in story Time, her man 0:08:33.480 --> 0:08:36.200 she was with her seven years dumb then they get 0:08:36.280 --> 0:08:39.360 checked out mentally obviously. Now she said she never found 0:08:39.480 --> 0:08:43.120 no traces of cheating, even that nigga was good at 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:47.040 covering his steps, or he just really didn't want to 0:08:47.160 --> 0:08:50.000 be there anymore, he didn't have a desire to be 0:08:50.120 --> 0:08:52.240 with another woman because he would have left her. Instead, 0:08:52.400 --> 0:08:54.800 she had to leave him, and he'd been trying to 0:08:54.840 --> 0:08:56.839 get up back of a sense, you never know what 0:08:56.960 --> 0:08:58.920 you got till it's gone. And that is cliche, but 0:08:59.120 --> 0:09:01.640 you really gotta listen into it. You can do everything 0:09:01.800 --> 0:09:04.800 right for a man, everything right for a friend, everything 0:09:04.960 --> 0:09:07.000 right for a family member. You know what I'm saying. 0:09:07.760 --> 0:09:10.559 You can cook, you can clean for your man, make 0:09:10.600 --> 0:09:13.440 sure he come home to dinner on the table. I'm 0:09:13.480 --> 0:09:15.640 talking about where he lack. You pick it up because 0:09:15.679 --> 0:09:18.160 everybody not up. There supposed to be ups and downs 0:09:18.200 --> 0:09:20.760 in a relationship. Everything is not supposed to always be good, 0:09:20.880 --> 0:09:23.400 not even with celebrities. It's not. Trust me, it's not. 0:09:23.520 --> 0:09:27.240 And we've seen some celebrity relationships fall. Ain't nobody perfect. 0:09:27.520 --> 0:09:29.599 That's why I say, in my mind, nobody should be 0:09:29.679 --> 0:09:32.319 fucking goals for nobody because we don't know what nobody 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:36.839 is going through. Everybody's dealing with something. Trust me, relationships 0:09:36.880 --> 0:09:41.280 are meant for trial and tribulation. It's all about the battle. 0:09:41.440 --> 0:09:44.560 Can y'all come together in battle? So y'all can win 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:46.840 a victory? Do you feel me? So y'all can bounce 0:09:46.880 --> 0:09:50.400 back and be stronger and be best friends. That family 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:52.920 member that's keeping a hole on you, ryan your coat, sail, 0:09:53.000 --> 0:09:54.880 draining you and all of that ship, but don't put 0:09:54.960 --> 0:09:56.559 your hand out to them because they ain't gonna have 0:09:56.640 --> 0:09:59.640 nothing for you that ship. Man. It may not even 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:02.679 be money. Whether you're just there for them to vent 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:04.200 to you all the time, but when you got to vent, 0:10:04.240 --> 0:10:06.199 they don't want to listen to you, or they're too busy, 0:10:06.880 --> 0:10:09.360 or I can't help you because you know what I'm saying. 0:10:09.640 --> 0:10:13.160 But you're gonna need me again. Your friends friends, certain 0:10:13.240 --> 0:10:17.160 friends use different friends for different ships, and I've always 0:10:17.640 --> 0:10:21.559 thought that was wrong, but it's situational. You never know 0:10:22.120 --> 0:10:24.719 you got different friends for different ships. But you are 0:10:24.800 --> 0:10:27.680 never to treat a friend bad. Always treat a friend 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:30.640 like you want them to treat you. You feel me, 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:35.320 I've lost a lot of friends being there, but in return, 0:10:35.440 --> 0:10:39.080 I get shipped. If you're feeling unappreciated and you're doing 0:10:39.240 --> 0:10:43.040 so much for motherfucker's that won't do nothing for you. 0:10:43.679 --> 0:10:46.320 You got to move on. Like my girl from Story Time, 0:10:46.559 --> 0:10:48.959 you move on there. We took us seven years, but 0:10:49.200 --> 0:10:54.600 she eventually gained back that respect and dignity within herself, 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:57.360 got the funk up and left. And here's another thing. 0:10:57.760 --> 0:10:59.840 You can't expect for people to think like you think. 0:11:00.440 --> 0:11:02.840 Understand what I'm saying. You may be the most generous 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:06.560 fucking person. You may be the most sweetest person. Give 0:11:06.679 --> 0:11:09.240 your last dime to somebody, give somebody the shirt off 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:13.280 your back. Don't think for one second that somebody else 0:11:13.320 --> 0:11:15.400 will do that just because you've known them for years, 0:11:15.679 --> 0:11:17.920 just because you've been with them for years, just because 0:11:17.960 --> 0:11:20.439 you are related to them. Yeah, y'all got the same blood, 0:11:20.480 --> 0:11:23.280 but probably not the same characteristics, not the same trait, 0:11:23.440 --> 0:11:25.839 not the same personality, but the same blood. Do you 0:11:25.960 --> 0:11:28.480 understand what I'm saying. Yeah, you laid down with this 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.360 nigga every night, but trust and believe he may not 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:34.199 still be thinking like you're thinking. Do not depend on 0:11:34.400 --> 0:11:38.200 him to think like you think until he proves you wrong, 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:41.959 until he proves otherwise. With your friend, y'all been friends 0:11:42.000 --> 0:11:44.319 for twenty something year, is still don't think in your 0:11:44.360 --> 0:11:47.120 mind that she's gonna do each and everything that you 0:11:47.280 --> 0:11:49.680 do for her for you, and it ain't gonna happen. 0:11:50.120 --> 0:11:52.520 That's why you have to go in knowing your worth. 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:55.360 That's why you have to go in knowing who you are. 0:11:55.440 --> 0:11:58.600 That's why you have to go in loving yourself, learning 0:11:58.679 --> 0:12:02.360 not how to give so much and take so little back. 0:12:02.880 --> 0:12:05.600 You're gonna weigh yourself. Then keep trying to be super 0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:09.280 woman for everybody. Ladies, it's not gonna happen. Now. I 0:12:09.360 --> 0:12:11.520 know this goes both ways because there are men being 0:12:11.640 --> 0:12:14.559 used up as well, but right now I'm dedicating this 0:12:14.720 --> 0:12:19.160 to my women. Happy belated Mother's Day. Now. I was 0:12:19.200 --> 0:12:22.400 in a situation where a guy got comfortable he was 0:12:22.480 --> 0:12:25.360 living with me. He got super comfortable. When I met 0:12:25.360 --> 0:12:27.440 at me at a job, everything was great, everything was great. 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:29.520 Oh my god, I started making good money, I started 0:12:29.559 --> 0:12:31.760 being on TV. Oh we quit his job. Oh yeah, this, 0:12:31.920 --> 0:12:33.840 this is what I'm doing. I'm about to reap these benefits. 0:12:34.080 --> 0:12:36.360 Um you know what I'm saying. You get comfortable, you 0:12:36.480 --> 0:12:40.560 get comfortable, you get complacent in your relationship, goes stagnant, 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:44.280 and you go nowhere, and you're growing. You're growing spiritually, 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:47.360 you're growing mentally, you're growing the funk up I'm talking 0:12:47.360 --> 0:12:49.959 about financially even bit you're trying to boss up. And 0:12:50.040 --> 0:12:54.160 then you got this person who's not this person who's 0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:57.719 just sitting in the corner watching you, expecting for you 0:12:57.840 --> 0:12:59.800 to break a piece of your growth and give it 0:12:59.880 --> 0:13:03.960 to them, expecting that Women, we are too good. Our 0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:07.319 hearts are so big, We take so much ship, and 0:13:07.480 --> 0:13:10.959 yet nobody checks on us. Yet nobody says, you know what, 0:13:11.080 --> 0:13:14.720 I'm sorry. Let me get you some flowers, yet nobody says, 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:15.880 you know what. Let me cook for you, let me 0:13:15.960 --> 0:13:18.480 take you out. Let me just call you and see 0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:21.679 how your day been. Let me just tell you you're beautiful. 0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:24.679 If you love me, you'll listen to this commercial and 0:13:24.720 --> 0:13:28.679 then we'll be right back. And that brings me to 0:13:28.840 --> 0:13:30.679 just fix my mess now. Of course, y'all know, I 0:13:30.760 --> 0:13:34.160 always turned to y'all online with my Twitter, my Facebook, 0:13:34.240 --> 0:13:36.800 and Instagram, and I ask y'all so y'all can share 0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:39.599 your experiences with me about the topics in which we 0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:43.439 discussed during Carefully Reckless. So I said, have you ever 0:13:43.559 --> 0:13:46.959 felt unappreciated? Like you try hard and you still get nothing. 0:13:47.559 --> 0:13:50.480 You know your worth, but you don't enforce it, therefore 0:13:50.640 --> 0:13:53.640 you stay? Why tell me about it? I'm gonna read 0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:57.520 off a couple pan Marie Q says everything I do 0:13:57.640 --> 0:14:00.320 ain't good enough for my mom. I try so hard, 0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:02.800 but she don't see it. She act like I won't 0:14:02.840 --> 0:14:04.760 run away, but I don't got no car, so I 0:14:04.840 --> 0:14:09.520 gotta stay and y'all stop playing with me, like stop, hey, yo, 0:14:09.720 --> 0:14:13.040 stop playing Pan Marie, like for real, y'all take your 0:14:13.080 --> 0:14:16.400 lott ass in the house. That's it. You ain't running away, yo, 0:14:16.559 --> 0:14:22.240 y'all agreez Yeta Underscore Mode says yes, I actually recently 0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:25.480 reflected on why I'm not big on holidays slash birthdays, 0:14:25.680 --> 0:14:28.800 and it's because I've never been celebrated but I often 0:14:28.920 --> 0:14:32.600 celebrate others. That's the ship I'm talking about. That's the 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:35.520 ship I'm talking about. Now. I'm not telling you to 0:14:35.760 --> 0:14:38.840 change who you are, because you shouldn't let somebody else's 0:14:38.920 --> 0:14:42.920 behavior define you as a person. If you are celebratory 0:14:43.040 --> 0:14:46.280 of others, still be that way, but require the motherfucker's 0:14:46.320 --> 0:14:49.400 to reciprocate it. Do you understand or you might have 0:14:49.480 --> 0:14:52.320 to fall back a little bit, start celebrating motherfucker's to 0:14:52.480 --> 0:14:56.360 celebrate you. That's what that is, because if it's genuine 0:14:56.440 --> 0:15:00.240 love between you two, it's automatically gonna be reciprocated because 0:15:00.280 --> 0:15:03.440 that person is gonna feel an obligation, not a favor. 0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:08.000 Underscore waw waw waw waw waw me I feel for 0:15:08.160 --> 0:15:12.320 me personally, it's the starting over falling again part that 0:15:12.400 --> 0:15:15.280 I'm afraid of not being alone or letting go, but 0:15:15.440 --> 0:15:18.760 having to start all over. So I stay and I 0:15:18.880 --> 0:15:22.480 tried my best to make it work, but it usually doesn't. Well, 0:15:22.520 --> 0:15:24.920 it sounds like you've done this more than once, baby, 0:15:25.360 --> 0:15:27.960 And maybe that's why your Instagram name is wy waw 0:15:28.080 --> 0:15:31.400 waw waw way me, because you didn't did that for 0:15:31.640 --> 0:15:34.800 every why you got so that's five wise in your name. 0:15:35.080 --> 0:15:37.360 You don't did this ship five times? I feel and 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:39.200 I know a lot of you are probably laughing and ship, 0:15:39.280 --> 0:15:41.320 but no, I see a message and everything and baby, 0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:43.640 that's your name. That's a cry for help. Your Instagram 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:46.920 handles a cry for help why me? Because you keep 0:15:46.960 --> 0:15:50.080 attracting the same thing, and you know why, because that's 0:15:50.120 --> 0:15:53.560 something within you you need to figure out. You need 0:15:53.640 --> 0:15:55.880 to learn your worth. You don't know it, or you 0:15:55.920 --> 0:15:58.520 wouldn't be asking why why me, and you wouldn't keep 0:15:58.560 --> 0:16:01.840 on getting in these sames situations. It's only gonna keep 0:16:01.880 --> 0:16:04.960 happening unto you if you keep repeating the cycle. You 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:09.760 are the exact example of giving more. Then you get 0:16:10.680 --> 0:16:14.640 giving yourself, your whole self and nothing but yourself, And 0:16:14.720 --> 0:16:18.120 people don't reciprocate that to you, and you don't require 0:16:18.240 --> 0:16:21.120 them to either. So that's why why Wow, Why it 0:16:21.240 --> 0:16:25.800 keeps happening to you? I underscore can underscore, only underscore 0:16:25.880 --> 0:16:29.080 be underscore, Tiff says, My reason is because you care 0:16:29.160 --> 0:16:31.640 about that person so much and you hope they'll see 0:16:31.680 --> 0:16:34.520 you trying and match you, or because you care about 0:16:34.600 --> 0:16:37.120 them so much that you actually want to do for 0:16:37.240 --> 0:16:41.280 them despite them not reciprocating the same. Mostly it's out 0:16:41.360 --> 0:16:44.400 of love and or genuine care. We can't help the 0:16:44.440 --> 0:16:46.720 fact that some of us are built different with the 0:16:46.800 --> 0:16:50.000 heart to care, nurture and provide. We get hurt the 0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:52.720 most too. And yes, you are right, because I was 0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:55.480 one of those people before. You are absolutely right. I 0:16:55.680 --> 0:16:58.840 was one of them, so I know, but I realized 0:16:59.040 --> 0:17:02.440 after le didn't. It happened to me not once, but twice, 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:04.840 and it ain't gonna be a third time. And I 0:17:04.880 --> 0:17:07.399 want to reflect on what you said. You said, we 0:17:07.560 --> 0:17:09.520 can't help the fact that some of us are built 0:17:09.600 --> 0:17:13.080 different with the heart to care, nurture and provide. Yes, 0:17:13.200 --> 0:17:16.320 you can help that. I'm not saying you have to 0:17:16.400 --> 0:17:19.760 be different, but you can help that. You can because 0:17:19.840 --> 0:17:22.200 you don't have to do it for everybody, and you 0:17:22.240 --> 0:17:24.639 don't have to do it so much. If you know 0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:27.440 you keep getting the shitty end of the stick, stop 0:17:27.520 --> 0:17:30.400 playing with that stick. You gotta find a good stick 0:17:30.920 --> 0:17:32.920 where it ends. Don't get shitty. Do you understand what 0:17:32.960 --> 0:17:35.719 I'm saying? All right now, this is a long one, 0:17:35.760 --> 0:17:37.680 but this is the last one I'm gonna read. And 0:17:37.920 --> 0:17:40.400 this is what I want to spend the most time 0:17:40.440 --> 0:17:45.639 on Eunica Senta says, girl, Yes, my husband and I 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:48.560 have been together for eleven years and a lot has happened. 0:17:48.760 --> 0:17:51.080 He lost both of his parents, so I said, okay, 0:17:51.320 --> 0:17:53.119 he needs me. I'm gonna build him up so he 0:17:53.160 --> 0:17:55.840 can return the favor and build me. But the grief 0:17:55.960 --> 0:17:58.480 was too much. He started drinking real bad and I 0:17:58.640 --> 0:18:01.440 left just for him to all me crying, begging me 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:05.760 for abortion money because he got some random bitch pregnant. 0:18:05.920 --> 0:18:07.800 When I left him, he had a good job and 0:18:07.920 --> 0:18:11.840 a car, just drinking real bad child. When he called 0:18:11.920 --> 0:18:14.560 me begging for that abortion money, my heart broke, not 0:18:14.760 --> 0:18:17.280 because of the pregnancy, but because I had never seen 0:18:17.359 --> 0:18:20.160 him at such a low point. All his utilities was off. 0:18:20.440 --> 0:18:23.280 He lost his job and car like he morphed into 0:18:23.359 --> 0:18:26.080 a fucking bum. Then here go my captain, save a 0:18:26.119 --> 0:18:28.920 whole ass, tell him I'd help him get back on 0:18:29.040 --> 0:18:31.720 his feet. Did not give him the abortion money though, 0:18:31.720 --> 0:18:34.680 because ha, that's what you get, and the process of 0:18:34.800 --> 0:18:37.320 helping him get back on his feet, I fell back 0:18:37.400 --> 0:18:39.880 in love with him. Now my baby is one year 0:18:40.000 --> 0:18:44.080 sober and we're still striving for greatness. I know, dot 0:18:44.200 --> 0:18:49.280 dot dot, I'm a dumb bitch, his dumb bitch. First 0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:51.920 of all, how the funk? Wait a minute, Wait a minute, 0:18:52.200 --> 0:18:54.280 scared because I didn't read the end of that. I 0:18:54.480 --> 0:18:57.119 read the beginning of it, and I said, Okay, this 0:18:57.240 --> 0:18:59.360 is what I'm gonna use. This is pretty good. First 0:18:59.400 --> 0:19:01.240 of all, it's a couple of things I want to say. 0:19:01.720 --> 0:19:04.640 You said his utilities was off, but as Dick wasn't 0:19:04.680 --> 0:19:07.639 off because he damn sure made a baby. Okay, a 0:19:07.720 --> 0:19:10.399 baby he didn't want, but he made one. And I 0:19:10.480 --> 0:19:12.840 get it. You're going through ship. A lot of times 0:19:13.080 --> 0:19:16.719 people can use their issues to play on people. They 0:19:16.920 --> 0:19:20.399 use that for manipulation to get what they need from others. 0:19:20.800 --> 0:19:23.480 Now that's not what happened in her case, because she 0:19:23.560 --> 0:19:27.440 said her baby has been sober for one year. And 0:19:27.560 --> 0:19:29.520 I love it. I love it. I love the end. 0:19:29.840 --> 0:19:31.920 But I want to get back to you what you said. 0:19:32.080 --> 0:19:35.040 I know I'm a dumb bitch, his dumb bitch. How 0:19:35.119 --> 0:19:37.400 are you dumb? That's what I want you to think 0:19:37.480 --> 0:19:40.879 about it. Listen, you're not dumb. You left when you 0:19:41.040 --> 0:19:43.240 seen there was a situation that you just couldn't be 0:19:43.280 --> 0:19:46.760 a part of anymore. He called you, he didn't call 0:19:46.880 --> 0:19:50.440 nobody else. He called you, obviously because you meant that 0:19:50.560 --> 0:19:53.160 much to him, and he saw more than just the lover, 0:19:53.280 --> 0:19:56.320 and you obviously saw a friend because any n that 0:19:56.440 --> 0:19:59.720 I'm with when I leave, he called me for money 0:20:00.040 --> 0:20:03.800 for my fucking abortion. For another bitch, I don't even 0:20:03.880 --> 0:20:06.680 need to finish the sentence because I know. Let me 0:20:06.760 --> 0:20:16.639 get a amen, because what the hell? You're better than me. 0:20:16.800 --> 0:20:20.240 Let's just say that. But obviously you know him better. 0:20:20.359 --> 0:20:23.720