Speaker 1: Hell I Suck at Dating with Dengler and dared Haven
Speaker 1: and I heart radio podcast. What's going on? Everyone? Welcome
Speaker 1: to an all new Help I Suck at Dating? And
Speaker 1: it's a weird day because it's not Sunday. We know
Speaker 1: you used to get in your podcast on a Sunday,
Speaker 1: but it's a Thursday. We've got a great episode for you, guys.
Speaker 1: Angela is still with us. If you haven't had the
Speaker 1: chance to go back and listen to our last episode
Speaker 1: where we deep dive into her new relationship with Brendan
Speaker 1: from Bachelor in Paradise, Canada. Um, But this week we
Speaker 1: have Jackie Dorman, who is the author of Married in
Speaker 1: Twelve Months or Less. She's going to be joining us shortly.
Speaker 1: Stay tuned and we'll get right into that. All right,
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Help I Suck at Dating, Dean, myself, Angela,
Speaker 1: and we are joined by a very special guest with
Speaker 1: a brand new program called Married in Twelve Months or Less,
Speaker 1: which answers a lot of questions we get better than
Speaker 1: Dean and I ever could It is Jackie Dorman. Jackie,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us. How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm great, I'm so excited to be here. I told
Speaker 1: my I told my middle daughter that I was coming,
Speaker 1: and she's like, Mom, you have no idea that this
Speaker 1: is so exciting. So I'm really excited to be here.
Speaker 1: Trust us, when you report back to her about how
Speaker 1: exciting it was, you're gonna be like it was nothing special,
Speaker 1: Like these guys are lame. Angela was cool. They're fun,
Speaker 1: they're fun. Um. So you are a relationship coach. Uh,
Speaker 1: and you have a brand new program out that is
Speaker 1: called married in twelve months or less? Uh? Can you
Speaker 1: do that? That's my first question. If somebody joins this program,
Speaker 1: are they going to get married in twelve months of less?
Speaker 1: Not even I'm not talking about engaged or finding sniffag
Speaker 1: other married ring on it down the altar, paperwork signed,
Speaker 1: paperwork signed, for sure, contracts signed. No, yeah you can.
Speaker 1: And one of the things that I learned, because I've
Speaker 1: been a matchmaker all of my life, and one of
Speaker 1: the things that I learned is I researched really good
Speaker 1: marriages because you can do this in twelve months or
Speaker 1: less really badly, Like there's two types of marriages that
Speaker 1: happen fast bad toxic codependent ones and really, you know,
Speaker 1: undeniably divine, you know, serendipitous, amazing ones. And so what
Speaker 1: I learned about really good marriages is that most of
Speaker 1: them the people met and got married in four months
Speaker 1: or less. H I know that's really hard because like
Speaker 1: this culture is like whoa, you gotta date for five years?
Speaker 1: I gotta make sure. It's like the cheesecake Factory menu.
Speaker 1: Do I really want the avocado egg rolls? Because this
Speaker 1: menu is so large? Maybe I want something else? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Maybe I just want chicken fingers. Yeah maybe. And so
Speaker 1: it's like because I think because of modern media, we
Speaker 1: have all these options, and it caused it causes analysis
Speaker 1: paralysis is what it causes. So I help people get
Speaker 1: out of their own way, get out of the waiting room,
Speaker 1: and really step into these amazing part ownerships where they
Speaker 1: can do incredible things together. It's really cool. Okay, I've
Speaker 1: got a question. I Uh. I've always had an issue
Speaker 1: with people that prioritize a relationship over finding the right partner.
Speaker 1: So when I hear get married in twelve months or less,
Speaker 1: what I process as hearing is forget about everything you
Speaker 1: want and needing a partner. We're gonna get you married,
Speaker 1: and it might not be to the person in your dreams,
Speaker 1: but you're gonna be married. That's how I that's how
Speaker 1: I like have a reaction to it. So I would
Speaker 1: love to be convinced otherwise, you know, for sure. And
Speaker 1: I do have I do have clients. I do have
Speaker 1: matchmaking clients that are like that. They just don't want
Speaker 1: to be alone. They haven't done the heart work. I
Speaker 1: call it the heartwork, and they are prior they are
Speaker 1: prioritizing that for sure. Um, but there's other people that
Speaker 1: you know, they know that this is the maturity plan
Speaker 1: for mankind is relationship, and they're ready to you know,
Speaker 1: I call it it's a yes until it's to know.
Speaker 1: They're ready to get out there, start dating. It's a
Speaker 1: discovery process, not just to get even know the other
Speaker 1: person by getting to know yourself. And they want to
Speaker 1: find the person that you know, they can partner with
Speaker 1: long term. And so yeah, I definitely have people that
Speaker 1: are prioritizing just being in any old relationship. But that's
Speaker 1: not what we do here for sure. Gotcha nice? Well
Speaker 1: that's good to hear because it scares me. It scares
Speaker 1: me when people because I, you know, I have friends
Speaker 1: that are like that too, And and we even just
Speaker 1: talked about it earlier on this podcast, to like these
Speaker 1: serial daters where they like they have no sense of
Speaker 1: self and they just want to jump from a relationship
Speaker 1: the next until they find the relationship that like sticks
Speaker 1: long enough to get married. And I mean, granted, you know,
Speaker 1: who am I to say what works for people and
Speaker 1: what doesn't work for people. But to me, it just seems, um,
Speaker 1: it just seems scary to me. So that's that's what
Speaker 1: I'm glad you cleared up because that makes a lot
Speaker 1: more sense to me. Now, Yeah, we don't want to
Speaker 1: do scary relationships. Um. We we differentiate between soulmates and
Speaker 1: spirit mates here, so you know, soul mates there their
Speaker 1: first season and a reason. A lot of times you
Speaker 1: have a lot of chemistry with those people. A lot
Speaker 1: of times you're dating them out of a deficit of
Speaker 1: your own. So you have some sort of deficit and
Speaker 1: they're filling it. It's kind of like the contract of
Speaker 1: I'll give you this if you give me that, and
Speaker 1: they have no longevity. Soul mates, if that's the only
Speaker 1: plane that you're connecting on, there's no real longevity there.
Speaker 1: Even if it lasts for ten years, it's gonna end eventually. Um,
Speaker 1: but spirit mates are another thing. It's like we have
Speaker 1: the soul realm, chemistry and connection, but when we come together,
Speaker 1: something magical is going to happen where we're gonna like
Speaker 1: be on assignment like some kind of destiny DNA. We're
Speaker 1: going to change the world together and that's going to
Speaker 1: keep us going long after the soulmate stuff fizzles out.
Speaker 1: And that's really what we specialize in, is helping people
Speaker 1: find that ride or die person where it just keeps
Speaker 1: getting better and better and better. So spirit made is
Speaker 1: like the evolved form soulmate. Gotcha totally. I have a
Speaker 1: question when you're talking about and I get like, yes,
Speaker 1: stuff fizzles out. Why do you think stuff does fizzle
Speaker 1: out just like the it just happens all the time
Speaker 1: and it just gets boring Or why why do you
Speaker 1: think things fizzle out? Well, it goes back to that
Speaker 1: Heartwork that we were talking about earlier. And I actually
Speaker 1: have another book besides the one that just came out
Speaker 1: called Heartwork, and it's it's just about you know, I
Speaker 1: have this, I have this deficit, I have this whole
Speaker 1: and I'm trying to I'm trying to put a human
Speaker 1: person in and I'm trying to fill it with something
Speaker 1: other than what's inside of me, and eventually you realize
Speaker 1: it doesn't work. It works for a minute, those contracts
Speaker 1: are valid for a minute of your giving me this,
Speaker 1: I'm giving you that. But pretty soon maybe I outgrow that,
Speaker 1: maybe I don't need that anymore from you. You're still
Speaker 1: trying to give it to me, but I no longer
Speaker 1: want it, Or what really happens a lot of times
Speaker 1: is you no longer giving it to me, and I
Speaker 1: still think I need it, so I'm gonna go find
Speaker 1: it in somebody else instead of finding it in myself. Right,
Speaker 1: So that's what happens, and its it comes down to
Speaker 1: attachment style. It comes down to you know, childhood trauma.
Speaker 1: Trauma doesn't just hurt us, It actually creates different versions
Speaker 1: of us, and those different kind or if it, versions
Speaker 1: of us, really can't fall deeply in love because we're
Speaker 1: always going to try to be evolving to our highest self.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense? Yeah, I guess it's kind of
Speaker 1: like the saying it's you can't love somebody else until
Speaker 1: you love yourself first. It's so that is it's cliche,
Speaker 1: but it it really is. Yeah, Well, there's a reason
Speaker 1: it's a cliche because it's true. Um yeah, do you
Speaker 1: believe in the phrase when you know you know? I
Speaker 1: think that it does happen. I think that some people
Speaker 1: get like the moment and they just know. But how
Speaker 1: can you tell how can you tell the difference between
Speaker 1: a soul mate and a spirit mate? There there's a
Speaker 1: lot of different criteria of a spirit mate versus a
Speaker 1: soulmate relationship. But they make you better. They bring out
Speaker 1: parts of you that you didn't even know existed. A
Speaker 1: lot of times something will unstal and unlock that you
Speaker 1: never even knew you wanted to do. When you're with
Speaker 1: this person and you know they have like they have
Speaker 1: this thing and it's it doesn't mean it's easy. I
Speaker 1: really want to emphasize that. A lot of times people
Speaker 1: are like, oh, this is the right person for me.
Speaker 1: We're just gonna get along. It's gonna be so easy.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be amazing. Uh yeah, it should. It shouldn't
Speaker 1: be like fighting and and terrible and you're just making
Speaker 1: it through it. But just because it's easy doesn't mean
Speaker 1: that that's the right person for you. It doesn't have
Speaker 1: to be easy to be worth it, and so spirit
Speaker 1: maids are not necessarily easy relationships. Sometimes they refine us
Speaker 1: more than any other relationship, but they're just making us better,
Speaker 1: constantly making us better. I really I believe that relationship
Speaker 1: is is the maturity plan for for humans. I believe
Speaker 1: that we're here to love and be loved. That that's
Speaker 1: really the magnum opus of our lives, is to learn
Speaker 1: how to love and be loved and learn how to
Speaker 1: come into deeper and deeper into me sy intimacy with
Speaker 1: each other. Okay, I mean, I agree. I think that
Speaker 1: it's important, and it's it's weird that we never are
Speaker 1: like really taught about that. And I know you talked
Speaker 1: a little bit about childhoods and its stuff like that,
Speaker 1: um and how they you were saying they don't have
Speaker 1: a huge impact or they have a refresh my memory,
Speaker 1: real kick what you said about that. I think the
Speaker 1: childhoods have a lot a lot of emphasis and impact
Speaker 1: on attachment. UM. You know, I came into the world
Speaker 1: running for my life. My my childhood was like a
Speaker 1: national geographic documentary, you know, where all the predators are
Speaker 1: lurking in the grass and the mothers just trying to
Speaker 1: give birth. To the baby. But as soon as the
Speaker 1: baby's out, it's like kicking the baby, Like get a baby,
Speaker 1: you gotta run. All these things are trying to eat you.
Speaker 1: And so that was my childhood. So I came out
Speaker 1: of the womb running for my life. And the only
Speaker 1: type of heart that I ever saw was a broken heart.
Speaker 1: And so it really does affect you when you hit
Speaker 1: puberty and you're coming into this romantic realm and who
Speaker 1: you choose. So okay, So that's that's kind of what
Speaker 1: I thought you were saying too, And I agree with
Speaker 1: you entirely. I know that my attachment style is avoidant
Speaker 1: based off of just the way that I was brought up,
Speaker 1: um and all this all that stuff. But why don't
Speaker 1: we put more of an emphasis on on like teaching
Speaker 1: children like the proper ways to like express the way
Speaker 1: that they love other people? You know? I feel like
Speaker 1: there's you go to school and you learn math and
Speaker 1: science and history, Like, why don't we teach that more often?
Speaker 1: I feel I feel like that could benefit us better.
Speaker 1: I agree, Yeah, absolutely, an ounce of preventions worth a
Speaker 1: pound of cure. The reason why we don't teach that
Speaker 1: is because, quite frankly, very few people know it. Most
Speaker 1: people are just you know, they're just operating at this
Speaker 1: very surface level in this counterfeit, like they don't even
Speaker 1: know the real them. They're not going to be able
Speaker 1: to teach anyone else how to to go to those
Speaker 1: deeper levels. So that's just where we are. Well, that's
Speaker 1: why we have people like you out there that it
Speaker 1: just it thinks that we have to come into we
Speaker 1: come into adulthood and then we have to decide for
Speaker 1: ourselves that we want to learn. It just can't be
Speaker 1: like ingrained in SS children. Uh, and like people that
Speaker 1: come from broken homes, like you're not gonna get it
Speaker 1: anywhere else. Like if you come from broken home, you
Speaker 1: just have to figure it out later in life. And
Speaker 1: you're just kind of screwed. And that's what you're that's
Speaker 1: the hand youred delt um. But I guess you know,
Speaker 1: maybe one they thinks will be different. But okay, So
Speaker 1: I got a question. So you're married, right, you've got
Speaker 1: a husband, David. Did you guys get married until months
Speaker 1: or less? How did that relationship? We did? Actually, so
Speaker 1: I was married before I was married for twelve years,
Speaker 1: I got divorced. It was it was a very tragic marriage.
Speaker 1: In fact, for anyone who's listening, a lot of times
Speaker 1: divorces are more like rescue missions, and my divorce was
Speaker 1: definitely a rescue mission. I was not going to survive
Speaker 1: it mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually if I stayed in that situation.
Speaker 1: And then before the ink is even dry on the
Speaker 1: dissolution papers, I'm like the least likely candidate for romance.
Speaker 1: I walk out into my front yard and I meet
Speaker 1: my spirit mate, and so listen, people need to know
Speaker 1: that you're not going to be all the way healed
Speaker 1: when you meet people. You're not going to have it
Speaker 1: all together. There's no ducks in this story that are
Speaker 1: in a row. There's no ducks in a row in
Speaker 1: this story. And so I walk out, and people like, Oh,
Speaker 1: that's so easy. I wish that could happen to me. Um,
Speaker 1: there's more to the story. I walk out into my
Speaker 1: front yard and I yelled at the man who is
Speaker 1: now my husband. I mean literally tore his head off,
Speaker 1: because earlier that week I had gotten an email saying
Speaker 1: that a sex offender had moved into our neighborhood. And
Speaker 1: I just put one in one equals two together. Hey,
Speaker 1: new guy, sex offender. I have a five year old daughter. Bro,
Speaker 1: I see you, I know who you are. You better
Speaker 1: back away and make sure that you're not coming over
Speaker 1: my property line. Right. That's how we met. Classic love
Speaker 1: story right there, right. Thank god that someone who didn't
Speaker 1: have my blind spots because I was in a total
Speaker 1: fear response. I was living in a fear response all
Speaker 1: the time because of everything that I've been through in
Speaker 1: that marriage before. And another lady, another neighbor, was standing
Speaker 1: there and she was watching, you know, this crazy thing
Speaker 1: that I did, and she's like, what's wrong with you?
Speaker 1: And she literally was like what's wrong with you? And
Speaker 1: I was like, he's the sex offender. Didn't she get
Speaker 1: the email? And she's like, I got the email. He's
Speaker 1: not the sex offender. She's like, I talked to him
Speaker 1: for an hour yesterday. He's a school teacher. It was
Speaker 1: really funny. But thank god my big head got another
Speaker 1: chance because we became friends and then in eight months
Speaker 1: we became married. Is your actual neighbor? Yes? Oh, She's like, thinking,
Speaker 1: who that's next door to me? Yeah? Come on, come on, okay,
Speaker 1: got you so? Okay? So did the program come after
Speaker 1: you had met your now husband? The twelve months or less.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we've we've been married for fifteen years. Okay,
Speaker 1: got you nice school. Congratulations and that obviously that's definitely
Speaker 1: worth celebrating. Um, it worked out right. Do you recall
Speaker 1: a lot from your personal experience then when you like
Speaker 1: work it into the class. Now, I don't want to
Speaker 1: call it a class, but like the program. I guess, yeah,
Speaker 1: my my new book that's out married in twelve months
Speaker 1: or lass. Um, there's a lot of personal antidotes in there.
Speaker 1: I've always been a matchmaker. I need to say this.
Speaker 1: Outside of the program. I've helped inside program, I've helped
Speaker 1: thousands of people do heartwork, get healing, get ready for relationship.
Speaker 1: I've helped hundreds of people get engaged and get married. Okay,
Speaker 1: So for those of you asked earlier, is it possible? Yes,
Speaker 1: it's very possible, and it happens, and these are good marriages,
Speaker 1: These are really good matches. But even before that, even
Speaker 1: though I was struggling in my own love life, I've
Speaker 1: always been the matchmaker. I've helped fifteen of my friends
Speaker 1: get married and people, I mean, if they if my
Speaker 1: friends see me coming, they're like, oh my god, who
Speaker 1: is she going to fix me up with what's going
Speaker 1: to happen? And out of those fifteen marriages, only one
Speaker 1: got divorced, and they really didn't need to. They just
Speaker 1: didn't have good information, like they needed better information to
Speaker 1: keep going. Would you say it's when you're getting all
Speaker 1: your friends engaged, your your your clients. Is it more
Speaker 1: about them? Uh? How do I when you're when you're
Speaker 1: playing hitch Is it more about finding the right person
Speaker 1: for them? Or is it more about the work afterwards?
Speaker 1: If that makes sense? Yeah, you know, is it like, oh,
Speaker 1: they meet this person, it's all gonna work out, it's
Speaker 1: gonna be fine. Or is it more of an ephicis
Speaker 1: of like yeah, I found you pretty much the right person,
Speaker 1: but now the real work begins now totally? Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: a lot of the healing that happens. You know, we
Speaker 1: can only do so much healing on our own, you know,
Speaker 1: no matter what seminars or books or therapy. So many
Speaker 1: of my clients were in therapy for decades, and they
Speaker 1: got so much more like a tipping point of of
Speaker 1: actualization after coming and working with me in my program.
Speaker 1: So so much healing comes after we're in these intimate
Speaker 1: relationships because we're accessing parts of our heart that we
Speaker 1: just can't access outside of relationship. There's there's things that
Speaker 1: are not going to ever come up until you really
Speaker 1: are forced to let someone in and then that stuff
Speaker 1: starts coming to the surface. I call it a revealing
Speaker 1: for healing, and that's when a lot of these people
Speaker 1: go deeper and deeper into their own healing, whether it's
Speaker 1: from childhood or from previous relationships. Inside of these relationships,
Speaker 1: that's where that happens. And um, and it's good. It's
Speaker 1: a good type of healing. UM. A lot of times
Speaker 1: people think, oh, we're supposed to be totally perfect when
Speaker 1: we meet the person. That's not going to ever happen.
Speaker 1: Every single person has yellow flags. Everybody has yellow flags.
Speaker 1: You're never going to meet someone who doesn't have an
Speaker 1: area where they're still in process. They're still working on it,
Speaker 1: they haven't arrived yet. And so if you're in a
Speaker 1: trauma response yourself, you're probably gonna escalate that yellow flag
Speaker 1: to a red flag and you're gonna cut and run
Speaker 1: before you ever give yourself a chance to get to
Speaker 1: know this person. And they might have been amazing, but yeah,
Speaker 1: they have some issues, but so do you. But then
Speaker 1: if you're in like a victim kind of counterfeit identity
Speaker 1: where you just don't care. You're driving your little wrecked
Speaker 1: up car into all the other cars. You're just swerving
Speaker 1: into the lanes even though you have blind spots, you're
Speaker 1: going to minimize those yellow flags into green like it's okay.
Speaker 1: These are the people that's Facebook status changes like every
Speaker 1: other week. In relationship, out of relationship. It's complicated because
Speaker 1: they don't care. They're just running headlong in. They're not
Speaker 1: even paying attention to the flags at all, and so
Speaker 1: everyone has yellow flags. But like I said, a lot
Speaker 1: of those a lot of those areas can really be
Speaker 1: worked through in good relationship. It's just about being self aware.
Speaker 1: Then totally, I have to ask, seeing how you brought
Speaker 1: it up because we talked about it last podcast, what
Speaker 1: the hell does it's complicated mean as a relationship status
Speaker 1: on Facebook? It's complicated means that I'm complicated. It means
Speaker 1: that my heart is not healed and um, I'm rebounding
Speaker 1: with no new information or no new healing. Right. So
Speaker 1: are they single? It means that they should be single
Speaker 1: because they need to still work on their heart. But
Speaker 1: they're not. I was being selfish if I was dating
Speaker 1: someone and their relationship satus was. It's complicated. It's over.
Speaker 1: Now are all of you are all of you in relationship.
Speaker 1: We're all happily taken, which is a bummer because I
Speaker 1: feel like it'd be awesome to be able to have
Speaker 1: you help us. Uh, you know, meet a perspective partner.
Speaker 1: Not a bummer. I take back the verbage I chose,
Speaker 1: but you know what I'm saying, like, there's gonna have
Speaker 1: to be a sacrificial lamb on this podcast. Unfortunately, someone
Speaker 1: has to take one for the team. But I guarantee
Speaker 1: that all three of you, in the relationships that you're in,
Speaker 1: you had to work through some stuff. Yeah, all the time,
Speaker 1: every day. Well, so here's a question for you, Jack, Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, Well that's it for me. I did want
Speaker 1: to ask you this because you said that most successful
Speaker 1: marriages are people that get married within four months of dating.
Speaker 1: You said you're friends with your husband for eight months?
Speaker 1: How so what what was the hold up for being friends?
Speaker 1: And then secondly, how long did it take for you
Speaker 1: to get engaged after you guys started dating? Great questions,
Speaker 1: So I should just clarify when I was researching kind
Speaker 1: of those bygone era marriages. Okay, so like the old
Speaker 1: fashioned marriages, the four months or lass, that's where that's
Speaker 1: coming from. You know, these marriages that have lasted for
Speaker 1: four or five, six, seven decades, Like, what did they
Speaker 1: all have in common? They all got married in four
Speaker 1: months or last I'm like, whoa, what the heck? Right,
Speaker 1: that's really fast. But what I also realized is that
Speaker 1: in that bygone era, there was something called community based matchmaking.
Speaker 1: And that's what I'm calling it. Where you married like
Speaker 1: the girl from high school, or the your brother's best
Speaker 1: friend from you know, from his baseball team, or just
Speaker 1: someone from your community, someone that you knew, And that
Speaker 1: is really what's missing. And that's what we do at
Speaker 1: M twelve M it married in twelve months or less.
Speaker 1: We utilize and leverage that six degrees to Kevin Bacon,
Speaker 1: that that six to that six degrees of separation, which
Speaker 1: just says that we're six people away from knowing everyone.
Speaker 1: We leverage this community to introduce people to people that
Speaker 1: maybe they don't know, but other people know. And so
Speaker 1: I met my husband, I yelled at him. We became friends,
Speaker 1: became car pool buddies, like driving the kids to and
Speaker 1: fro because he had a nine and eleven year old
Speaker 1: I had a five year old. And then four months
Speaker 1: in he said, you know, if I ever get remarried,
Speaker 1: I don't think I'm gonna have to look very far.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, he likes me. Yeah, what a line, right,
Speaker 1: And I was like whoa. And then that's when the
Speaker 1: heart wounds the roosters came home to roost, because as
Speaker 1: soon as I realized this guy was looking to be
Speaker 1: like that, I was like, oh no, no, hell no,
Speaker 1: it's not gonna have in here. And so I was scared,
Speaker 1: and I kind of for a few weeks it was
Speaker 1: like I don't know about this. But within four months
Speaker 1: from then we were engaged. We were all engaged for
Speaker 1: eighteen days and then we got married. Here is the
Speaker 1: really cool thing. He was my neighbor. But two years
Speaker 1: before I met him, I was at an outdoor event
Speaker 1: and they had this big jumbo tron and they had
Speaker 1: these pranked videos of there's the people that worked at
Speaker 1: this organization. They had pranked their staff, you know, like
Speaker 1: punked with Ashton. And so I'm watching this pranked video
Speaker 1: and I feel really drawn to this guy, and not
Speaker 1: because he's hot, not because I'm like, yeah, I was
Speaker 1: still married at the time. Even I was just like,
Speaker 1: I know this guy. I went to school with this
Speaker 1: guy something. He's just so familiar to me. Fast forward
Speaker 1: two years met him, is my neighbor. We get married
Speaker 1: in eight months. Don't remember that video. And then after
Speaker 1: we get married, we're moving. We like moved right after
Speaker 1: we got married, and he pops his VCR tape in
Speaker 1: it's that video two years before I met him. I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, that's I was so drawn to you.
Speaker 1: It was just really crazy. And you know what, we
Speaker 1: ended up having so many mutual friends. That's why I
Speaker 1: was at that event in the first place. And so
Speaker 1: so often my my clients, especially for matchmaking, they've just
Speaker 1: been ships kind of passing in the night all along,
Speaker 1: and it's really cool to watch that happen. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: think that's funny. You're like, oh, fact, I was watching
Speaker 1: this video fast forward. I thought this guy was a
Speaker 1: sexual predator, and then he became my husband for sure.
Speaker 1: Like I didn't remember at all when I first met him.
Speaker 1: It wasn't until I saw the video again and I
Speaker 1: was like, whoa new memory unlocked. Do you find yourself
Speaker 1: having more pressure when you set up like a friend
Speaker 1: or an acquaintance and when you would like a client
Speaker 1: or something. For sure, there's definitely yeah. I mean you're
Speaker 1: there's more personal attachment to that. I actually just set
Speaker 1: up I had a good friend who passed away at
Speaker 1: forty six from cancer. I just set up her husband. Um,
Speaker 1: she's been gone, she's been you know, she's been passed
Speaker 1: away for three years now. I just set up her
Speaker 1: husband and they're actually engaged in getting married in May.
Speaker 1: And that was super. That was like I felt like
Speaker 1: she was like yeah, Like I felt like she was
Speaker 1: in agreement with that. It was really it was really exciting. Wow. Yes,
Speaker 1: well much Jackie. Before we let you go, I got
Speaker 1: one question for you. So obviously a lot of our
Speaker 1: listeners this podcast, they listen because they look for advice.
Speaker 1: They for some reason trust mine and Jared and Angeli's
Speaker 1: opinion for some reason, which is weird because they should
Speaker 1: trust your opinion more than anything else. So, what what's
Speaker 1: one piece of advice you could give our listeners who
Speaker 1: are feeling like scared or hesitant, especially like to get
Speaker 1: back out their post pandemic. Yeah. I think that I
Speaker 1: think that, you know, the pandemic just like the like
Speaker 1: the wars, the World Wars, like after the after the
Speaker 1: World Wars, after that crisis, that human crisis, we had
Speaker 1: a baby boom, right because people were craving intimacy and
Speaker 1: sex um. But then after the pandemic and we've been
Speaker 1: in isolation, you know, we're we're realizing how lonely we
Speaker 1: really are because of you know, out this this for sabbatical,
Speaker 1: this time of distraction being minimized. And so I think
Speaker 1: that the pandemic is actually giving birth to a marriage boom.
Speaker 1: I really think it is, and I'm witnessing it myself.
Speaker 1: And so my advice to all your listeners would be,
Speaker 1: you know, just just be willing to put yourself out there.
Speaker 1: You know, just be willing to put yourself out there.
Speaker 1: You know, dating should be fun. I know a lot
Speaker 1: of people hate to date, but it's a it's a
Speaker 1: self discovery process. It's not really about necessarily getting to
Speaker 1: know that person as much as it's about getting to
Speaker 1: know yourself, because the people that you choose to spend
Speaker 1: your time with, that tells you a lot about yourself.
Speaker 1: And if you'll be really self aware, you'll you'll learn
Speaker 1: a lot through this process and it will lead you
Speaker 1: even faster to the person that's right for you. Nice,
Speaker 1: I love it. Great advice. Uh it sounds like business
Speaker 1: is booming, which is amazing. Uh So for anyone that's
Speaker 1: interested in joining your program, where can they find you?
Speaker 1: They can find my book just came out called Married
Speaker 1: twelve Months or Last Claim your Love Life, Heal your
Speaker 1: Heart and unlock the secret defining your spirit Mate. They
Speaker 1: can find that anywhere books are sold, Amazon, Barnes and Noble,
Speaker 1: any place. And then to join my program, it's love
Speaker 1: stories dot com. Love stories dot com. Yeah that is cute.
Speaker 1: Get that? Yeah, I feel like correct it is. It's
Speaker 1: prime real estate. It actually was purchased by my partners,
Speaker 1: like I think maybe ten plus years ago. So see
Speaker 1: how it all just comes together, Genie, it's like the
Speaker 1: park place of you are l s. Yeah. Nice, Nice, Well, Jackie,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us. Um we can't
Speaker 1: wait to hear more from you and see you put
Speaker 1: together more couples, and who knows, maybe in twelve months
Speaker 1: we'll see a lot more married couples come out of this.
Speaker 1: So thank you so much. We'll see you next time. Thanks,
Speaker 1: thank you, Hie. I thought Angela closes us. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: I say anything that comes to your mind, Say whatever
Speaker 1: you want to say, randall on for as long as
Speaker 1: you want. The only thing you need to say at
Speaker 1: the very end is be sure to tune in next week,
Speaker 1: because maybe we'll suck just a little bit less. That's
Speaker 1: what the listeners. They yearn for it. They don't tune
Speaker 1: in for anything other than here. And I say that
Speaker 1: at the end of the podcast, So tune in next
Speaker 1: week and maybe we'll suck a little bit less on it.
Speaker 1: However you want, pressure of pressure clear my throat, y'all?
Speaker 1: All right, okay, ready, alright, alright guys, thank god, I
Speaker 1: can't do We're keeping this whole thing in. This whole
Speaker 1: thing stays in, alright, I got it, all right, guys,
Speaker 1: thanks for listening to this podcast. I am so thankful
Speaker 1: to have been a guest with Jared and Dean and
Speaker 1: it was so much fun talking to Jackie about her
Speaker 1: new book, Married in twelve Months or Less. Make sure
Speaker 1: you tune in next week to listen, and maybe we
Speaker 1: will suck a little bit less at dating. Yeah, Rush,
Speaker 1: that was glorious kill in the game, follow help by
Speaker 1: suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you
Speaker 1: listen to podcast