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Speaker 1: When we're vocal about what we care about. When we decide,

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Speaker 1: When we actively decide what delights us and then allow

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Speaker 1: ourselves to delight in those details, you attract more of it.

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Speaker 2: What's shaken.

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Speaker 3: Emily A body here coming to you with another installment

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Speaker 3: of Hurdle Moment from Hurdle, a Whileness Focus Podcast, reconnect

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Speaker 3: with everyone from your favorite athletes to top experts and

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Speaker 3: industry CEOs about their highest highs, toughest moments, and everything

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Speaker 3: in between. We all go through hurdles in life, and

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Speaker 3: my goal through these discussions is to empower you to

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Speaker 3: better navigate yours and move with intention so that you

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Speaker 3: can stride towards your own big potential and of course,

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Speaker 3: have some fun along the way. For today's episode, I

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Speaker 3: am chatting with Megan V. Murphy is the editor in

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Speaker 3: chief of Women's Day. She's also the author of the

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Speaker 3: book Your Fully Charged Life, and that topic is exactly

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Speaker 3: what we're here to chat about.

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Speaker 2: We are here to talk.

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Speaker 3: About how to be more positive on the regular, specifically,

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Speaker 3: how to let go of negative thoughts. As she puts it,

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Speaker 3: embrace the yay and bring your best self to every moment.

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Speaker 2: It sounds a.

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Speaker 3: Little complicated, or maybe it sounds easier than I'm letting on.

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Speaker 3: But the truth is is that when you embrace a

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Speaker 3: positive mindset, then positive things will find you. I can

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Speaker 3: promise you that the sentiment energy attracts like energy is

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Speaker 3: a sentiment that I literally embrace every single day when

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Speaker 3: I think about what I want out of the day.

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Speaker 3: That is what I am doing. I'm putting what I

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Speaker 3: want into the world. And so Megan is opening up

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Speaker 3: about exactly how we create that energy for ourselves with

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Speaker 3: her tried and true tricks and solutions. She opens up

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Speaker 3: up about her journey, how she became such a yay

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Speaker 3: person after overcoming a bout of grief dealing with the

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Speaker 3: loss of her father, and also how she seeks out

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Speaker 3: optimism and positivity even when things in her life are

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Speaker 3: not going as planned, even as she herself navigates hurdles

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Speaker 3: as a working mom of three. I'll be the first

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Speaker 3: to admit that some days it is difficult to take

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Speaker 3: on a positive perspective. But by listening to this episode,

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Speaker 3: I trust that you will be well equipped with the

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Speaker 3: tools you need to do just that. Make sure you're

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Speaker 3: following along with hurdle over on social it's over at

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Speaker 3: Hurtle Podcast. I myself am over at Emily a Body.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to put the link to Meggan's book You're

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Speaker 3: Fully Charged Life in the show notes if you're interested

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Speaker 3: in grabbing yourself a copy, and last, but not least,

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Speaker 3: I want to take care of a little bit of

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Speaker 3: housekeeping and that I've received some messages lately. I think

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Speaker 3: Spotify has been a little iffy. Who knows what's going on.

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Speaker 3: But if you are having difficulty on your chosen streaming platform,

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Speaker 3: the good news is that it is available on nine

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Speaker 3: different platforms. I'm talking Google podcasts, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, tune In,

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Speaker 3: cast box, you name it. So if ever you have

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Speaker 3: a problem, I promise you Hurdle is available to you.

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Speaker 2: You just might need to pivot a little bit.

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Speaker 3: And while you're pivoting, do me a solid rate and

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Speaker 3: review the show if you have a second. Wherever you

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Speaker 3: get your podcasts, it means the world to me. Five stars,

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Speaker 3: positive vibes, And with that, let's get to it. Let's

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Speaker 3: get to hurdling.

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Speaker 2: Today. I am sitting down with Meghan B. Murphy. What's

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Speaker 2: the beef stand for? Megan?

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Speaker 4: So I didn't have.

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Speaker 1: A middle name as a kid, and when I got married,

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Speaker 1: I decided to go from you can to Murphy because

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Speaker 1: Meghan Murphy sounds leper Coonnish versus Megan Buchan, which was

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Speaker 1: always like Buchanan without the extra am.

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Speaker 4: But I wanted to nod to my past a little bit.

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Speaker 1: But my dad didn't like Buchan and always made fun

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Speaker 1: of our last name anyway, So I just made be

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Speaker 1: with no period. And it was sort of this thought

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Speaker 1: of like, it can be anything I want it to be,

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Speaker 1: and I can be anything I want to be.

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Speaker 3: Megan Bie would be you can be anything you want

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Speaker 3: to be, as you can hear. We're already starting this

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Speaker 3: on a positive note where we're going today. But Megan

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Speaker 3: is the author of a book called Your Fully Charged Life.

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Speaker 3: She's also the editor in chief of A Woman's Day.

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Speaker 3: How are you doing today, I'm doing pretty great. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm just gonna go right in off the bat.

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Speaker 2: Tell me something you're grateful for today?

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Speaker 4: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: Well, I woke up at six am with my middle

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Speaker 1: son because he really wanted to get his book report done,

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Speaker 1: and we were up at the crack but working on

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Speaker 1: his paper, and we invented a peaches and cream smoothie

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Speaker 1: and got it done before anybody was awake, and it

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Speaker 1: was just like kind of quality one on one time

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Speaker 1: got three kids, so like, just like that morning magic

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Speaker 1: with one kid felt really special.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, really special.

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Speaker 3: Also, I love that we invented a smoothie before anyone

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Speaker 3: else woke up.

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Speaker 2: AKA also used a blunder.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, it was so loud.

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Speaker 1: Well, we didn't start blending till seven fifteen, when we

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Speaker 1: knew big Sis had to be up, and then.

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Speaker 4: It was like.

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Speaker 3: Then it was time. Well, I'm so excited to finally

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Speaker 3: have you on the show. And I know, as I

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Speaker 3: said at the top of this, you are an author

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Speaker 3: of the books called Your Fully Charged Life.

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Speaker 2: I'll make sure to get in the show notes.

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Speaker 3: But let's talk a little bit about why the title

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Speaker 3: of this book. What made you want to write about

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Speaker 3: taking advantage of your every day? Well?

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Speaker 1: I think the thing is is, like we all probably

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Speaker 1: have a book in us, right, It's what people ask

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Speaker 1: of us. And for me, people always ask for me

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Speaker 1: like okay, like can I bottle your energy? How do

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Speaker 1: I channel that positive energy? And for me living this

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Speaker 1: way fully charged I like to call it was hard

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Speaker 1: won and it took me years and years and years

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Speaker 1: to develop the toolkit to hack my own happiness, like

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Speaker 1: not to get all sad and cry. But as my

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Speaker 1: father was dying, I sort of made a promise to him.

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Speaker 1: And sometimes I choke up when I talk about it,

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Speaker 1: and sometimes I don't, but it would be to leave

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Speaker 1: a legacy of positive energy because I transformed from somebody

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Speaker 1: who was nicknamed Neggie Meggie, who wore a grumpy necklace

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Speaker 1: and had some really tough times to somebody who really

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Speaker 1: does prioritize positivity and live with optimism and joy even

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Speaker 1: when their dad is dying. And so it became my mission,

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Speaker 1: sadly on his deathbed, to get this book out and

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Speaker 1: to share this toolkit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you so much for sharing that.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's understandable that you have so much emotion

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Speaker 3: surrounding a topic a passion that is so so strong

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Speaker 3: for you, and I think it's really beautiful that you

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Speaker 3: have learned how to harness this emotion and turn it

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Speaker 3: into a.

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Speaker 2: True project, a true calling, if you will.

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Speaker 1: Well, I think the funny thing too, is about grief

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Speaker 1: and that my friend Rabbi Steve, who's the Rabbi in

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Speaker 1: residence at Woman's.

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Speaker 4: Day talks about it of these waves of grief.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes when I talk about my father, I can laugh

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Speaker 1: and smile and I don't get choked up. And sometimes

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Speaker 1: I just say his I just say pop, and I'm

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Speaker 1: in tears. So it's like those you just don't know

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Speaker 1: seven years later. I never know how it's going to

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Speaker 1: hit me, but sometimes it does. And I never try

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Speaker 1: to like suppress or hide that emotion. I just lean

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Speaker 1: into it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, lean in. I love that.

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Speaker 3: That's definitely been something that I have been working on

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Speaker 3: over the last year as well. So before we talk

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Speaker 3: about how to bring this positivity into your every day,

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Speaker 3: I would be a little bit curious. I'm curious to

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Speaker 3: know if your friends, the people that you surround yourself with,

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Speaker 3: your family, et cetera, had any sort of reaction to

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Speaker 3: you stepping into this power of positivity, shifting a little

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Speaker 3: bit maybe from the megan they knew before.

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Speaker 1: It's funny, so people who know me now aren't surprised

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Speaker 1: at all people who knew me then. It's really more

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Speaker 1: of like, you know, my best friend from childhood, Stacy Krause,

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Speaker 1: who like my hobby as a child, was literally sitting

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Speaker 1: who drove by, like I was like a miserable little kid.

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Speaker 1: For her, it like to see this transformation is mind blowing,

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Speaker 1: But for people who only know me in the past

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Speaker 1: ten years, it's it's not that shocking. And it has

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Speaker 1: been a very gradual, gradual transformation. I had many hurdles

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Speaker 1: in my teen years. I suffer from a raging eating disorder.

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Speaker 1: I was hospitalized three times. My best friend passed away

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Speaker 1: from her eating disorder, and sort of going.

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Speaker 4: Through therapy and going through all of.

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Speaker 1: That, I began to have some tools and some strategies.

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Speaker 1: But the crazy part was it literally wasn't until I

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Speaker 1: was an editor at Cosmopolitan magazine and was tasked with

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Speaker 1: this assignment of writing an article called the Seven Secrets

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Speaker 1: of Happiness. And you know you have magazine background, you know,

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Speaker 1: my editor in chief didn't know what the heck that

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Speaker 1: story looked like. She just knew she wanted tech cover line.

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Speaker 1: So then these were the days before Google. I had

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Speaker 1: to start kind of researching, okay, happiness, and that's when

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Speaker 1: I discovered the work of doctor Martin Seligman, you know,

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Speaker 1: the forefather of positive psychology. Stumbled upon the perma theory

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Speaker 1: of wealness, and like for the first time realized whoa

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Speaker 1: happy People weren't just happy because they're inherently happy, Like

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Speaker 1: there are these action steps, these choices, these ways that

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Speaker 1: we can live to do happiness and change our disposition,

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Speaker 1: Like it just hadn't occurred to me, Like I could

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Speaker 1: live differently. And I started to try happiness on and

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Speaker 1: there was a very gradual process. So it wasn't until

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Speaker 1: years and years later that I feel like I started

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Speaker 1: farting rainbows, because some days I feel like I fart rainbows.

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Speaker 1: I completely retrained my brain. I mean to truly have

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Speaker 1: I see the good. I can silver line anything. It

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Speaker 1: doesn't mean it doesn't mean I don't hurt, it doesn't

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Speaker 1: mean that things don't suck. But because I'm so grounded

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Speaker 1: in gratitude and practice prioritizing positivity, I have changed the

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Speaker 1: way I see the world.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And so you talk about that transition to having

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Speaker 3: this outlook, keeping that power of perspective to be gradual.

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Speaker 3: Talk a little bit about how it felt as you

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Speaker 3: were trying on this positive way of thinking.

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Speaker 1: So I was talking like people like look to Oprah

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Speaker 1: in those like aha moments, like all of a sudden

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Speaker 1: it clicked absolutely not. I started thinking about the different

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Speaker 1: aspects of the happiness equation, the happiness formula. Okay, what

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Speaker 1: if I protect my sleep? What if I move my

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Speaker 1: body in a way that feels good that versus a

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Speaker 1: way that's punishing. What if I really like work on

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Speaker 1: my connections, smile at a stranger. What if I do

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Speaker 1: things like get out in nature? And how do those

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Speaker 1: things make me feel? How do those things change the

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Speaker 1: way I move through my day? And oh, my goodness,

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Speaker 1: how do they make it better? And gratitude was a

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Speaker 1: really big one for me because I always thought of

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Speaker 1: gratitude of like, okay, yeah, we'll sit around the Thanksgiving table,

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Speaker 1: we're eating turkey, and we'll talk about something we're grateful for, right,

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Speaker 1: Like that's what gratitude felt like, something to do with

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Speaker 1: thanksgiving or something like really woo woo yokies with crystals

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Speaker 1: in their pocket were good at, but never something I

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Speaker 1: was going to be able to practice. And even when

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Speaker 1: I started to try to practice gratitude, it felt like

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Speaker 1: home work. I got to keep a gratitude diary. I

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Speaker 1: freaking love that idea, and I want to high five

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Speaker 1: anybody who can put it into practice, but it didn't

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Speaker 1: work for me. It was too homeworky, it was too rigid.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't wrap my head around it. And it wasn't

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Speaker 1: until I started asking myself what's your ya for the

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Speaker 1: day and creating yay lists that it started to work

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Speaker 1: for me. I had to fund filter gratitude to be

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Speaker 1: able to adopt a gratitude practice. And now I mean, like,

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Speaker 1: I truly believe gratitude is a secret sauce in life

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Speaker 1: makes the answer to everything.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I appreciate what you're saying here.

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Speaker 3: What I'm hearing you say is really that you had

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Speaker 3: to make it work for you and you didn't have

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Speaker 3: judgment about the fact that your process may look different

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Speaker 3: than whatever you may be scrolling by on Instagram.

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Speaker 4: Well that's what I kind of like want, Like.

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Speaker 1: This happiness tool kit, They're just what I've created are tools,

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Speaker 1: and everybody's toolkit is different, and the tools we need

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Speaker 1: on different days are going to be different. I knew

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Speaker 1: meditation needed to be a tool in the toolkit, but

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Speaker 1: it wasn't a tool I really used right Like it

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Speaker 1: was like the filled head screwdriver that I never picked

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Speaker 1: up because all my screws were flatheads, right, all of

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Speaker 1: a sudden, I'm like, wait, a second, meditation might be

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Speaker 1: a tool I need to start to implement. So it's

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Speaker 1: really about like knowing what the tools are and then wow,

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Speaker 1: understanding when you might need to use them, and then

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Speaker 1: just taking that microaction to try.

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Speaker 3: It on, right, trying it on. So let's dive into

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Speaker 3: the tools. I know you kind of went through a

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Speaker 3: few important notes here. You mentioned movement, prioritizing your sleep,

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Speaker 3: getting out in nature. But let's dive in and get

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Speaker 3: a little bit more specific. So where does someone begin

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Speaker 3: when they're trying to focus in on their gratitude and

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Speaker 3: find the joy and every day?

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Speaker 1: I think it's one teeny little microaction. I think what

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Speaker 1: I always try to remind people is that like, we're

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Speaker 1: not broken, and I can't fix you, and you don't

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Speaker 1: even need fixing, but tomorrow could be more awesome. And

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Speaker 1: that means there's probably one thing that you could do,

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Speaker 1: one little thing today you could do to inch onward,

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Speaker 1: because that's what it's really all about. Getting unstuck and

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Speaker 1: moving forward. Onward is a big mantra for me. Onward, onward, onwards.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes that's what I need to repeat to myself in

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Speaker 1: a day. But those those microactions can be all kinds

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Speaker 1: of little different things, right, and then my book I

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Speaker 1: break down. You know, there is the health charge, and

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Speaker 1: that's where I'm going to give you the sleep strategies

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Speaker 1: and the movement strategies and all that. Like, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm somebody who had you know, arraging, needing to sort

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Speaker 1: of exercise myself, exercise to punish myself. And then I

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Speaker 1: was the fitness director of Self magazine and a certified

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Speaker 1: trainer for twenty years and ran marathons and really learned

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Speaker 1: to embrace fitness and movement. I underwent a double missectomy

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Speaker 1: in October and was sidelined, you know, for eight weeks

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Speaker 1: and had to you know, relearn health and wellness and

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Speaker 1: movement once again. I mean, if you would have told

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Speaker 1: me now, I walk five miles a day and I

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Speaker 1: go to bar method, I basically don't recognize myself, right, Like,

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Speaker 1: that's not how I moved in the past. But I

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Speaker 1: know movement is a key tool, and that feels really good.

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Speaker 1: There are relationships, So I always talk about the love

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Speaker 1: charge and relationships, how much relationships matter. And I think

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Speaker 1: we need to think beyond like a spouse, a partner,

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Speaker 1: a boyfriend, a mother in law. You know, it's really

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Speaker 1: about those so called weak ties. How we interact with

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Speaker 1: a cashier, how we interact with the ups man. This

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Speaker 1: became so evident to me during the pandemic when I

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Speaker 1: craved connection, even though I was in a house of

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Speaker 1: five people, I craved connection. And I would sit on

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Speaker 1: my porch and talk to Anthony the ups man, from

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Speaker 1: a distance, and that would be my little lightning bolt

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Speaker 1: of electric charge because I knew I need that interaction.

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Speaker 1: We need each other, We need our weak ties. And

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Speaker 1: that means that when I'm going to go to the

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Speaker 1: grocery store, I'm going to use the name tag as

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Speaker 1: a gift, and I'm going to say good morning David,

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Speaker 1: like how's your day. I'm gonna smile at him, right

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Speaker 1: because I need that week time.

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Speaker 4: We need each other.

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Speaker 1: There are times when I'll just walk to my pharmacy

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Speaker 1: and do a lap and say hi to Teresa and

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Speaker 1: see how Bev's doing, because I need connection. And especially

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Speaker 1: in a lonely work from home life, there's a lonely

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Speaker 1: epidemic in this country. And the solution is we need

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Speaker 1: each other. We need to smile at each other. We

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Speaker 1: need to when you're walking, phone down, head up, Hi,

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Speaker 1: smile at a stranger. They don't have to smile back,

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Speaker 1: but put that good energy out there because you need

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Speaker 1: that connection. So I focus a lot on relationships, and

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Speaker 1: you can be an introvert and still practice this technique.

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Speaker 4: We need each other. It's important.

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Speaker 1: I do a lot of reframing to get to a

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Speaker 1: positive place, and I'll do reframing even to trick myself

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Speaker 1: into practicing gratitude.

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Speaker 4: I don't have to. I get to.

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Speaker 1: When I first got to move my body again after

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Speaker 1: a double misectomy, I cried with such gratitude, like I

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Speaker 1: got to do that again. How lucky, lucky, lucky. I

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Speaker 1: don't have to do laundry. I get to because my

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Speaker 1: kids got to go to the cross practice today. They

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Speaker 1: got to get dirty knees.

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Speaker 2: Fuck. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: How does someone who has difficulty with the reframing practice

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Speaker 3: really embrace seeing things from a different perspective?

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Speaker 1: Just try it on right, Like it doesn't have to

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Speaker 1: be this immediate thing. But what I often say to

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Speaker 1: people is like change the way you do things to

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Speaker 1: change the way you see things. So maybe you can't

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Speaker 1: make that have to to get to flip right away.

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Speaker 1: But honestly, how can you change the way you see

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Speaker 1: the world today? Could you run a different route, could

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Speaker 1: you pick a different ATM machine? Could you take a

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Speaker 1: different line at Trader Joe's. Changing the way you do

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Speaker 1: things helps change where you see things and could wake

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Speaker 1: you off of autopilot to make other positive changes.

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Speaker 2: For sure.

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Speaker 3: You know, at the beginning of the year, in January,

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Speaker 3: one of the things that I was striving to do

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Speaker 3: was do one new thing every week. A It's a

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Speaker 3: lot easier to add one new thing into your routine

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Speaker 3: than maybe even anyone realizes, right, So if that could

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Speaker 3: be as simple as going to a new cafe, but

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Speaker 3: I kind of took it to another level and I

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Speaker 3: tried pickleball, I went to a pottery studio. Like I

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Speaker 3: was just introducing new random activities into my week in

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Speaker 3: a way that.

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Speaker 2: Felt really fulfilling.

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Speaker 3: And it was very clear to me that that added

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Speaker 3: fun as you call it, that added yay, was the

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Speaker 3: thing that helped me find gratitude and excitement and all

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Speaker 3: the other things in my life that I was already doing.

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Speaker 1: It's only because we get stuck on autopilot totally.

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Speaker 4: No we forget to be alive. We just live. And

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Speaker 4: will you wake that up by.

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Speaker 1: Taking the pottery class, buying yourself flowers, you know, literally

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Speaker 1: walking on the opposite side of the street, eating breakfast

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Speaker 1: at a different time instead of having eggs, having a smoothie. Right,

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Speaker 1: It's like sometimes you just need a shake up to wake.

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Speaker 2: Up, shake up to wake up.

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Speaker 3: As my friend Nick Dio calls it, it's breaking the matrix,

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Speaker 3: mixing things up.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, I know.

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Speaker 3: You also talk a lot about how saying no it

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Speaker 3: can be really powerful when it comes to choosing yourself.

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Speaker 3: Talk to me a little bit about how that plays

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Speaker 3: into the scheme of things.

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Speaker 1: I find that we're all too polite, and so we

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Speaker 1: say yes when we want to say no because we

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Speaker 1: don't want to hurt feelings. And my reframe is that

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Speaker 1: saying no is a form of self care more important

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Speaker 1: than a manicure, massage, or even a workout. Like it's

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Speaker 1: radical self care. We need to say no. We need

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Speaker 1: to prioritize our happiness by saying no. So therefore, when

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Speaker 1: we do say yes, we have room to say yes

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Speaker 1: to things that matter. And I have become a relentless

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Speaker 1: no sayer and I try to give other moms and

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Speaker 1: women permission to do the same. My kid doesn't have

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Speaker 1: to go to every birthday party. No, he doesn't even

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Speaker 1: like that kid. No, why I'm gonna say like no, right, like,

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Speaker 1: and I'll often do my no. But you know, with

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Speaker 1: people I care about, like my mom, you know, will

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Speaker 1: be like, oh, I want to go see this community

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Speaker 1: play at the Long Branch Theater And I'm like, no,

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Speaker 1: but I love you and I want to spend time

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Speaker 1: with you. So no, but you want to go to

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Speaker 1: lunch and go shopping more my speed. Right, So it's

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Speaker 1: it's like understanding that that no frees up, but yes

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Speaker 1: that matters.

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Speaker 3: Taking a break from today's episode to give some love

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437
00:23:45,600 --> 00:23:48,640
Speaker 3: Hurdle to get a free sample pack with your purchase today.

438
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:49,760
Speaker 2: Again, that's drink.

439
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,639
Speaker 3: Lmnt dot com slash hurdle to get a free sample

440
00:23:52,720 --> 00:24:03,119
Speaker 3: pack of all their delicious flavors with your purchase today. Lately,

441
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:06,560
Speaker 3: we're so inundated with the concept that the word no

442
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:10,720
Speaker 3: is enough as well. Right, So I like that you

443
00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:13,920
Speaker 3: caveated that by saying with people that I care about,

444
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,320
Speaker 3: I want to make sure that we're communicating appropriately surrounding

445
00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:20,960
Speaker 3: the no. But in other situations, no can just be enough.

446
00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:26,840
Speaker 1: It's if it's though a mom, a mother, somebody that's

447
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,000
Speaker 1: in the sensitive, you know, like somebody you really care

448
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:32,879
Speaker 1: about that you want to protect their feelings. But like

449
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:35,880
Speaker 1: you asked me to volunteer for the carpool line, no

450
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 1: hard stop, full sentence like, no, I'm not going to

451
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:41,359
Speaker 1: do that.

452
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:46,480
Speaker 2: No, not on my radar today, Not on my radar today.

453
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:50,640
Speaker 3: We've talked a bit about your history with Movement and also,

454
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 3: as you so bravely shared speaking about your mes ectomy

455
00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:57,560
Speaker 3: in October, you mentioned a big word for you is

456
00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 3: the word onward. How were you able to continue on

457
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:07,640
Speaker 3: with your positive mindset despite going through such unexpected challenges.

458
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 1: You know, I feel I feel really grateful. I'm always

459
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:17,320
Speaker 1: grounded in gratitude. You know, my so my miosectomy was elective.

460
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 1: My mom had breast cancer twice. I had lost my

461
00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:23,960
Speaker 1: dad to pancreatic cancer. I've seen seen chemos, seen radiation

462
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 1: like I have the genetic mutation, and I had had

463
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 1: many scares, and I had been getting screenings like gosh,

464
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 1: like every three months for the past two years. And

465
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,719
Speaker 1: I got tired, and I wanted to take charge of

466
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 1: my health. I wanted to be fully charged in my

467
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 1: health space. So I went through the surgery and it

468
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:47,400
Speaker 1: was the craziest thing happened is the night I got home,

469
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:52,640
Speaker 1: I got lce. My kid had had school pictures, shared

470
00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:55,280
Speaker 1: a brush and I'm sitting getting just gotten home from

471
00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 1: the hospital, can't lift my arms bandaged four drains, and

472
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 1: my my daughter sends me a picture and she's like, Mom,

473
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:04,880
Speaker 1: there's bugs in my hair. And I'm like, oh my god.

474
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,760
Speaker 1: Yell to my husband like I can't get out of

475
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:09,280
Speaker 1: the chair. It's gonna take me twenty minutes, seat ot

476
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,159
Speaker 1: of the chert. Can you go say? And she had

477
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:13,280
Speaker 1: put my hair in a top knot with her brush,

478
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:16,119
Speaker 1: so I'd freaking lice. And it was like the most

479
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:19,320
Speaker 1: beautiful reminder to me in that moment of like we

480
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:22,640
Speaker 1: are never in charge. We are actually never in charge.

481
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 1: I had this surgery to try to take charge of

482
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:25,920
Speaker 1: my health.

483
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:26,480
Speaker 4: But guess what.

484
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:30,760
Speaker 1: The only thing I can truly control is my reaction.

485
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,520
Speaker 1: And so right now I need to laugh at lice,

486
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:37,000
Speaker 1: because if I can't laugh at lice, I will never

487
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:40,359
Speaker 1: move onward. And it is something that I always really

488
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:44,080
Speaker 1: focus on, is my reaction matters, and I am completely

489
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:46,840
Speaker 1: in charge of that reaction. No matter what I'm going through,

490
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:49,240
Speaker 1: no matter how hard something is, no matter how much

491
00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:52,719
Speaker 1: something sucks, I'm in charge. I get to decide how

492
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:56,199
Speaker 1: I react, and that is so incredibly empowering. And I

493
00:26:56,359 --> 00:26:58,920
Speaker 1: choose the fully charged path again and a freaking again

494
00:26:59,000 --> 00:26:59,800
Speaker 1: and a freaking again.

495
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you mentioned your version of daily gratitude in

496
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 3: being that Yale list. Explain what the Yale List is

497
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 3: and how someone can start their own.

498
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 4: So it was really born from grief.

499
00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:17,800
Speaker 1: My dad was my man, my person, and when he

500
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,280
Speaker 1: was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, it was like a few

501
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,639
Speaker 1: months and gone, and it was brutal. I mean, I

502
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:26,160
Speaker 1: had three little kids at the time, a big job,

503
00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:29,520
Speaker 1: and I didn't actually know how to get out of

504
00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:32,159
Speaker 1: bed in the morning. I didn't think I could do

505
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:36,720
Speaker 1: it right, like it was super super low and I'm talking.

506
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 1: I had like a five year old to three year

507
00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:41,359
Speaker 1: old and an eighteen month old. I was like the

508
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 1: deputyator of Self magazine and I couldn't get out of bed,

509
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:49,880
Speaker 1: and I inched myself out of bed by reminding myself

510
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:53,200
Speaker 1: of one thing that didn't suck. And that's literally how

511
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:57,239
Speaker 1: the yal list started. That's literally I got angry and

512
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 1: tried to evaluate what didn't suck that day, and I

513
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:03,320
Speaker 1: looked really hard at it because it felt like everything sucked,

514
00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:06,680
Speaker 1: and it would be like, oh my gosh, there's freaking

515
00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:10,160
Speaker 1: heart foam on this latte. That is pretty amazing. I'm

516
00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 1: gonna focus on this foam. Hoh bait. It's some pretty

517
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:16,359
Speaker 1: mean hartshape form my goddamn latte, Like that doesn't suck,

518
00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna take a picture of it and I'm

519
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:21,800
Speaker 1: gonna share on Instagram with a hashtag you know ya,

520
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 1: the a list Operation Good Grief, And I'm gonna do

521
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:28,359
Speaker 1: it again tomorrow. Tomorrow, I'm gonna notice the daffodils that

522
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 1: just bloomed at the end of my sidewalk, because that

523
00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:35,400
Speaker 1: doesn't suck. I like flowers flowers don't suck, and I'm

524
00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:38,040
Speaker 1: gonna take picture and I'm gonna share it. And I

525
00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:40,800
Speaker 1: also was sharing it with the hashtag operation good Grief.

526
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:44,040
Speaker 1: So not only was I looking for the good in

527
00:28:44,080 --> 00:28:48,400
Speaker 1: the world, I was also opening up about my pain.

528
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:51,880
Speaker 1: And so I had this community around my grief, people

529
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:56,120
Speaker 1: cheering me on to find the AA and it became

530
00:28:56,640 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 1: easier and easier to find things that didn't suck. And

531
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: I will tell you, for the first year, I was

532
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 1: still using that language what doesn't suck today, because truly

533
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 1: I could hardly get out of bed. And then ultimately

534
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:16,320
Speaker 1: I began to retrain my brain, you know, the neural

535
00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:19,440
Speaker 1: pathways were different, and I was like seeing more and

536
00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: more good and it was getting easier and easier, and

537
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,680
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, the daffodils, the latte, Oh

538
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:28,440
Speaker 1: my gosh, my cute tank top. Like it was like

539
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:30,840
Speaker 1: I was really starting to see the good in the world,

540
00:29:30,840 --> 00:29:33,240
Speaker 1: to appreciate the good in the world, to feel grateful

541
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:36,440
Speaker 1: for the things that didn't suck. And ultimately, after my

542
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,880
Speaker 1: dad passed and I had really committed to this legacy

543
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:41,800
Speaker 1: of positive energy, I also wanted to change the language

544
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: around it, and it became finding the Ya The Ya

545
00:29:45,880 --> 00:29:48,920
Speaker 1: list and truly is just a fun, filtered approach to

546
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,920
Speaker 1: practicing gratitude. I didn't know that's what I had started

547
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:52,200
Speaker 1: to do.

548
00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:53,920
Speaker 4: I didn't notice. I didn't know.

549
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 1: That I was practicing gratitude, and that's why I was

550
00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 1: starting to feel better, one microaction on a.

551
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:01,480
Speaker 2: Time, onward onward.

552
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:05,120
Speaker 3: And I love the gamification that you used to help

553
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:08,480
Speaker 3: yourself through this time period. And I also appreciate what

554
00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:12,680
Speaker 3: you mentioned about the power of getting others involved in

555
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:15,320
Speaker 3: your journey, getting to a place where you can be

556
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:19,280
Speaker 3: a little bit vulnerable knowing that there is positivity and

557
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 3: good vibes for you on the other side.

558
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 2: Why is it important to get others involved.

559
00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:27,880
Speaker 3: In your journey if you really want to embrace a

560
00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 3: more positive and grateful life.

561
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 1: I think it's really individual, right. So I'm somebody who

562
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:36,959
Speaker 1: needs community. I thrive with a sense of community. I

563
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: want to feel hugged, I want to feel understood. I

564
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,880
Speaker 1: want to relate to other people. And I just sort

565
00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:45,760
Speaker 1: of learned very early in my life that when I

566
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:50,360
Speaker 1: make my mess my message and welcome people into my pain,

567
00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:54,160
Speaker 1: I feel better. So when I shared that like my

568
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,479
Speaker 1: dad was dying, of pangar ottic cancer. I can't tell

569
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 1: you how many people stepped up and like, oh, I

570
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:01,040
Speaker 1: lost my father to pancreatic cancer. I wound up having

571
00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:04,120
Speaker 1: grief mentors. People showed me what it looked like to

572
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,720
Speaker 1: come out the other side. If I hadn't been vulnerable,

573
00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 1: if I hadn't opened up, if I hadn't inspired a

574
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:13,800
Speaker 1: sense of community, I wouldn't have had those incredibly valuable mentors.

575
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: I needed a grief mentor more than I ever needed

576
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 1: a career mentor. What I needed a grief mentor. I

577
00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:21,560
Speaker 1: needed to know that someday I would breathe again, that

578
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:24,120
Speaker 1: it was going to be better. And so for me,

579
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 1: that sense of I want to feel a sense of belonging.

580
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 1: I want to feel understood. I want to be able

581
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:31,880
Speaker 1: to help other people as well. I want to have

582
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:35,040
Speaker 1: a community of understanding. Community is such a core value

583
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:37,640
Speaker 1: to me. It's even I'm the chief spirit officer of

584
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 1: my town and I run the social media as a

585
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:43,040
Speaker 1: hobby because I think we should all love where we

586
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:44,960
Speaker 1: live and feel connected to our neighbors. It's one of

587
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 1: the secrets to happiness. So whether that's your intimate community

588
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:49,960
Speaker 1: of where you actually live or a global community of

589
00:31:50,040 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 1: the people around you comes back down. Do we need

590
00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:54,440
Speaker 1: each other? We need each other in so many ways

591
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:55,080
Speaker 1: we don't even know.

592
00:31:55,840 --> 00:31:57,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean two things to touch on here.

593
00:31:57,720 --> 00:32:02,040
Speaker 3: One, what you're getting at this thing that we all

594
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 3: just really want to be seen, heard and feel less

595
00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 3: alone in whatever it is that we're going through. So,

596
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:10,360
Speaker 3: whether it is navigating as you so beautifully share the

597
00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:12,880
Speaker 3: loss of your father, or just going on a day

598
00:32:12,920 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 3: to day journey, navigating that inner critic that we all have,

599
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:19,800
Speaker 3: and maybe how you feel about your body, there is

600
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 3: someone out there that is going through a struggle that

601
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,360
Speaker 3: feels like you do. So opening up really gives you

602
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 3: that really beautiful opportunity. And then the other thing that

603
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 3: you said, which I really appreciate.

604
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 2: Is stepping into your values. Right.

605
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 3: It seems to me that a broader understanding of self,

606
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:41,560
Speaker 3: and even bigger than that, a full understanding of what's

607
00:32:41,600 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 3: important to you and what you value, has enabled you

608
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:46,720
Speaker 3: to really step into.

609
00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:49,120
Speaker 2: This power of positivity. Would you agree? Does that resonate

610
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:49,360
Speaker 2: with you?

611
00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:51,880
Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, I wear my core values on my wrist,

612
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:55,360
Speaker 1: so I have this massive arm party and you know

613
00:32:55,400 --> 00:33:00,640
Speaker 1: what they say, freedom, family, and fun. My three values

614
00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:03,000
Speaker 1: are fun, family, and freedom, and I view the world

615
00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:06,560
Speaker 1: through that lens. Does it improve my family? Is it fun?

616
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:09,360
Speaker 1: Does it contribute to my freedom? Because those are the

617
00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:12,200
Speaker 1: three core values I mean, and obviously community, and there's

618
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 1: a whole bunch of other but those are my three

619
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:19,360
Speaker 1: important key values fun, family, and freedom. And I know

620
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 1: it seems almost like fun that's your core value. Yes,

621
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:27,240
Speaker 1: I fun filter life and that's important to me.

622
00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 3: And that's all that really matters, right, because they're your values,

623
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:33,240
Speaker 3: They're not somebody else's values. It's like when we talk

624
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:37,240
Speaker 3: about the term self worth, right, It's like so often

625
00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:41,120
Speaker 3: it is so easy, because of the highlight reel and

626
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:43,840
Speaker 3: the world that we live in, to gauge how we

627
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:46,280
Speaker 3: feel or believe that we should feel based on what

628
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 3: we see in the world around us. But really, where

629
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:52,760
Speaker 3: is your worth coming from? Self worth? How do you

630
00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:56,200
Speaker 3: feel about yourself when you're by yourself? That's where we begin,

631
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 3: and then you move forward from there with how you

632
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:01,160
Speaker 3: interact with everything that's happening around you.

633
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:03,520
Speaker 1: And I will say, like, so I'm going to be

634
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,000
Speaker 1: I'm going to be forty eight. I'm not going to

635
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 1: be forty eight for a few months. But but as

636
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 1: I was telling you earlier, I like to try on

637
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 1: my new age before I get there, So I like

638
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: basically just walk around saying I'm forty eight, but I'm

639
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:17,560
Speaker 1: really forty seven. But I think the gift of being

640
00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:22,239
Speaker 1: this old is that I've outgrown vanity. I've stopped giving

641
00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:26,560
Speaker 1: a shit when anybody thinks, and I really feel content

642
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 1: grounded in gratitude. And I think, like especially people who

643
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: suffer from fomo or gratitude is the antidote to that,

644
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 1: because when you appreciate what you have and you're grateful

645
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:39,640
Speaker 1: for your world, you don't need to compare to other peoples.

646
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, what a really beautiful sentiment. So for someone

647
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:50,760
Speaker 3: who does feel challenged by this, that is struggling with fomo,

648
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:53,680
Speaker 3: that's not quite there. Do you have any other advice

649
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 3: for them on how to get rooted in their own

650
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 3: gratitude practice.

651
00:34:58,719 --> 00:35:02,200
Speaker 1: I think it's give yourself a break and treat gratitude,

652
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:05,239
Speaker 1: to treat your treat yourself with grace, Like you don't

653
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 1: need to adopt a gratitude practice today and like write

654
00:35:09,600 --> 00:35:14,200
Speaker 1: five things right, like what could could you maybe maybe

655
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:18,160
Speaker 1: decide that something doesn't suck today and just acknowledge it

656
00:35:18,200 --> 00:35:20,920
Speaker 1: take stock and something you appreciate. Could you just pause

657
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:24,160
Speaker 1: for a hot second and be like, Wow, I really

658
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:28,440
Speaker 1: appreciate the fact that, like the laundryes fold it right,

659
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 1: Like it doesn't have to be major. It could be

660
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 1: like I really appreciate that I like, you know, had

661
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,400
Speaker 1: fresh squeezed orange juice, Like it doesn't it doesn't have

662
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,880
Speaker 1: to be like I appreciate, Like it doesn't have to

663
00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 1: be global, it doesn't be massive, just one thing. I

664
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:45,439
Speaker 1: like to think of everything in microactions, Like definitely there's

665
00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,600
Speaker 1: one tiny little thing that you could do today to

666
00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 1: pause to appreciate.

667
00:35:50,320 --> 00:35:53,560
Speaker 2: What's one thing that you're looking forward to right now?

668
00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 1: Megan, I like have really I became a walker and

669
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:01,520
Speaker 1: I'm going to walk in the woods five miles with

670
00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:07,400
Speaker 1: my labradoodle after this interview. And it's I laugh and

671
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:10,000
Speaker 1: I smile on these walks because I'm like, I was

672
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 1: a marathon er, I was a competitive runner never in

673
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:16,520
Speaker 1: a bajillion years. I mean, I feel like I should

674
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:18,520
Speaker 1: be like in an easy spirit commercial, like I don't

675
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 1: even know myself.

676
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,160
Speaker 4: I walk.

677
00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:24,240
Speaker 1: I walk places like I need sneakers with more heel support.

678
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 1: Now I'm like, who am I? But man, I look

679
00:36:27,719 --> 00:36:30,240
Speaker 1: forward to my daily walks. I love being in nature.

680
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 1: It is so magical for me. I love just breathing

681
00:36:34,680 --> 00:36:38,160
Speaker 1: in the like the woodsy air and noticing the cherry blossoms,

682
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,839
Speaker 1: and like having this time with my dog, who now

683
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:43,200
Speaker 1: is obsessed with me because he had never been walked

684
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:45,439
Speaker 1: in four years, because I didn't really know you needed

685
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:48,839
Speaker 1: to walk a dog. You have a fenced in yard

686
00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 1: and it's enough shit the dog needs to be walked.

687
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 1: But now he's my best friend. And I notice new

688
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:57,680
Speaker 1: things on all of my walks and I I have

689
00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 1: this new practice. So I used to hide at rocks.

690
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:03,920
Speaker 1: You started like the Gratitude Rocks project, where you would

691
00:37:04,239 --> 00:37:06,920
Speaker 1: hide rocks with positive messages around town for people to

692
00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:09,720
Speaker 1: find and spark joy. Maybe the rocks as you're stronger

693
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:12,280
Speaker 1: than you think you are this or that. I started

694
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:17,200
Speaker 1: hiding these little metal angels on my walks for people

695
00:37:17,239 --> 00:37:22,440
Speaker 1: to find, and it gives me like such like I

696
00:37:22,680 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 1: just love the idea of somebody finding one of these

697
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:28,600
Speaker 1: little angels on their walk and what it would do

698
00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 1: for their day.

699
00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 4: Because rocks got too heavy to carry on five miles.

700
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:37,120
Speaker 1: These little angels in my pockets, but that's I get

701
00:37:37,120 --> 00:37:38,520
Speaker 1: like and I can't wait to hide them.

702
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:41,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's adorable. That's truly so sweet.

703
00:37:42,040 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 3: And you know what I hear when I listen to

704
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 3: you talk is really just you have such a keen

705
00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:49,200
Speaker 3: awareness of the things that bring you joy. And it

706
00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 3: sounds so simple at surface, right to say to someone

707
00:37:55,080 --> 00:37:57,799
Speaker 3: or just to ask someone, like what are the things

708
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:00,560
Speaker 3: that you enjoy? But you have truly done the work

709
00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:04,520
Speaker 3: to have a strong understanding of what's on that list.

710
00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:07,400
Speaker 3: And it doesn't need to be something that takes you

711
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,799
Speaker 3: hours to put together. I would just encourage anyone that's

712
00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:13,279
Speaker 3: listening to this to take stock of what would go

713
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:15,480
Speaker 3: on that list, to sit down with yourself for five

714
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:18,600
Speaker 3: or ten minutes, even over a few days. It doesn't

715
00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:20,680
Speaker 3: even need to be all at once and take some

716
00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:23,120
Speaker 3: time to articulate the things that bring you joy, because

717
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:26,360
Speaker 3: once you do, you will be, without a doubt better

718
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 3: for it.

719
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:28,799
Speaker 4: I talk a lot about.

720
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:31,600
Speaker 1: This in the book, little strategies like have a damn

721
00:38:31,640 --> 00:38:32,320
Speaker 1: favorite color.

722
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:33,839
Speaker 4: Have a favorite color and.

723
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 1: Make sure people know about it, like my book cover

724
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:38,879
Speaker 1: is orange, my front door is arge. I can't tell

725
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: you how many times someone is like, set me you know,

726
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,840
Speaker 1: flowers like thought of you I saw these orange roses

727
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:48,000
Speaker 1: at Trader Joe's and they left them on my doorstep,

728
00:38:48,360 --> 00:38:50,799
Speaker 1: or like, we'll screenshot something with a lightning bolt because

729
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 1: they're like I thought of you.

730
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:52,439
Speaker 4: Right.

731
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,360
Speaker 1: When we're vocal about what we care about, when we decide,

732
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:59,200
Speaker 1: when we actively decide what delights us and then allow

733
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:02,719
Speaker 1: ourselves to delight in that detail and those details, you

734
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:05,080
Speaker 1: attract more of it. People know I love orange and

735
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:06,680
Speaker 1: lightning bolts. I can't tell you how much of that

736
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:09,359
Speaker 1: I attract into my life. People know my Murphy's laws.

737
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 1: I buy myself flowers every Monday. I can't tell you

738
00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:15,240
Speaker 1: how many people have just randomly sent me flowers. Because

739
00:39:15,280 --> 00:39:17,880
Speaker 1: you attract what you put out, and it's okay to

740
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:21,560
Speaker 1: delight in the details. And these things aren't frivolous, they're necessary.

741
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:25,200
Speaker 1: And that's the thing I think people don't recognize. It's

742
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:26,920
Speaker 1: okay to get a new pair of shoes and think

743
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:29,759
Speaker 1: they're the best thing that ever happened, and like, walk

744
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:32,600
Speaker 1: on sunshine when you wear them, And that's not frivolous,

745
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:35,520
Speaker 1: it's necessary. We need to delight in the details because

746
00:39:35,520 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 1: life is scary and hard, and there's so much.

747
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:39,160
Speaker 4: Bad stuff out there.

748
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,360
Speaker 1: And our negativity bias is so strong. So what happens

749
00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:44,840
Speaker 1: if you flip the switch and allow yourself to delight

750
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 1: in the details, to find the yay and actually enjoy it.

751
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:52,040
Speaker 3: And not all the details need to involve spending money,

752
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,319
Speaker 3: right as you already articulated, right, your delight in the

753
00:39:55,320 --> 00:39:57,399
Speaker 3: details is being able to go out for a walk

754
00:39:57,440 --> 00:39:59,440
Speaker 3: with your dog. Your delight in the details is being

755
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:01,760
Speaker 3: able to put on orange because you know this color

756
00:40:01,840 --> 00:40:04,839
Speaker 3: makes you feel energized and excited. Find the things that

757
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 3: make you happy, find the things that bring you joy,

758
00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:10,680
Speaker 3: and make sure that you're surrounding yourself with those things.

759
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:14,800
Speaker 3: Because as you so beautifully put, energy attracts like energy

760
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:15,920
Speaker 3: hard stop.

761
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:19,279
Speaker 1: And I talk about that. I love science because I'm

762
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 1: a magazine editor, service journalist for twenty five years. So like,

763
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:24,799
Speaker 1: there's forty five pages of citations in my book, and

764
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:27,840
Speaker 1: even the thing with like I use the term dopamine

765
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 1: dressing and talk about in clothed cognition, like your clothes

766
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:34,439
Speaker 1: do matter, Like you know, dress up to feel up.

767
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:36,960
Speaker 1: I don't wear black because I'm not. My life is

768
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:39,040
Speaker 1: not it's a party, it's not a funeral. But like

769
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:42,120
Speaker 1: some people feel sleek and wonderful and happy and black,

770
00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:46,640
Speaker 1: but like understanding just basically understanding how things affect you,

771
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:50,280
Speaker 1: like kind of just how does that make me feel?

772
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:54,279
Speaker 1: Really taking stock throughout the course of your day, and

773
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:57,160
Speaker 1: then the things that delight you get more of that,

774
00:40:57,280 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 1: do more of that, surround yourself with more of that.

775
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:02,280
Speaker 3: Meghan would have no idea what to do with my closet,

776
00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:03,719
Speaker 3: but black makes me feel good.

777
00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:05,879
Speaker 4: And that's but that's the thing.

778
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,239
Speaker 1: That's because we assign the meeting to our wardrobe, right

779
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 1: like I want emojisque prints and bright colors. But that's

780
00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:15,359
Speaker 1: because that's like you just have to see You have

781
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,520
Speaker 1: to just notice how you feel. And that's with being

782
00:41:18,520 --> 00:41:21,480
Speaker 1: on autopilot. We don't notice how we feel. And if

783
00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:23,920
Speaker 1: we don't notice how we feel, we can't find the AA.

784
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:26,839
Speaker 3: If we don't notice how we feel them, we can't

785
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:29,520
Speaker 3: find the A. All right, Well, final question, how are

786
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:30,960
Speaker 3: we feeling today?

787
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,560
Speaker 1: I really feel good, like you got me on like

788
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:37,000
Speaker 1: a five out of a five day. I just did

789
00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:41,439
Speaker 1: a cardiobar methic class. I'm about to go for a walk, fun,

790
00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:43,040
Speaker 1: family and freedom check check.

791
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:44,759
Speaker 2: Check check check check.

792
00:41:44,840 --> 00:41:46,960
Speaker 3: Well, Meghan, I'm so glad that we were able to

793
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:49,200
Speaker 3: sit down today. If they don't follow you just yet,

794
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:50,480
Speaker 3: how do the hurdlers keep up with you?

795
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 2: How do they follow along with you? Give us your details?

796
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 4: Oh kay?

797
00:41:54,480 --> 00:41:57,120
Speaker 1: So I'm at Meghan me E A G H A

798
00:41:57,280 --> 00:42:00,560
Speaker 1: N B. Murphy on social media. I'm not TikTok. I

799
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:04,280
Speaker 1: don't know how to do that. I wrote a book,

800
00:42:04,360 --> 00:42:07,200
Speaker 1: Your Full Charged Life, that's available wherever books are sold,

801
00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:09,360
Speaker 1: which sadly mostly means Amazon.

802
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:10,600
Speaker 4: What else? That's it?

803
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:12,560
Speaker 2: Right, that's it, right, that's it.

804
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:17,160
Speaker 3: I'm over at Emily Body and at Hurdle Podcast another

805
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:18,280
Speaker 3: hurdle conquered.

806
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:19,560
Speaker 2: Catch you guys next time