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Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, it's your big sister Cheeky's and you've reached

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Speaker 1: my personal voicemailbox for the Dear Cheekys podcast. I'm here

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Speaker 1: to give you a device on anything and everything you

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Speaker 1: need help with. Whether you're going through a breakup or

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Speaker 1: having issues with your family, or maybe you have a

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Speaker 1: question about my personal life. Whatever the case is, I

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Speaker 1: want to hear from you. Remember these are my thoughts

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Speaker 1: in my opinions, and if you're suffering from a serious

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Speaker 1: issue or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional.

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Speaker 1: All right, now, go ahead and leave your message at

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Speaker 1: the sound of the beeB.

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Speaker 2: Hello, he needs submit advice from someone who doesn't know me.

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Speaker 2: I'm in a twenty one year relationship with my high

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Speaker 2: school sweetheart. We have four amazing children, and throughout the

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Speaker 2: duration of a relationship we've endured I've endured multiple extramarital

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Speaker 2: affairs on his behalf, and I've always forgiven him. He

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Speaker 2: swears that he doesn't know why he does these things,

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Speaker 2: and I kind of believe him, and I have faults

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Speaker 2: of my own. I'm a little emotionally withdrawn from the relationship,

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Speaker 2: which I know does an excuse, but it can contribute

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Speaker 2: to the symptoms. I just don't know what to do.

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Speaker 2: I love him and I could definitely continue on with him,

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Speaker 2: but I don't think I can continue on with this

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Speaker 2: type of life. It's not fair for me, it's not

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Speaker 2: fair for my children. And I've seen him on his

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Speaker 2: knees recently begging, not begging for forgiveness, but he definitely

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Speaker 2: wants to change, and I just don't know how we

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Speaker 2: go forward. You know, how do we start all over?

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Speaker 2: Even though I love him?

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Speaker 1: Ooh, this is tough. First off, thank you for trusting

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Speaker 1: me enough to give you advice. Look, when they say

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Speaker 1: love is not enough, this is what they mean in

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Speaker 1: this situation. And you know, I'm all about love. I

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Speaker 1: am like love. Even the people that hurt us send

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Speaker 1: them love and light. I really believe in the power

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Speaker 1: of love. But in a situation like this, twenty one years,

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Speaker 1: four children later, multiple infidelities, in my personal opinion, this

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Speaker 1: is what they mean when they say love isn't enough.

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Speaker 1: I know you love him, and I'm sure he loves you,

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Speaker 1: but not enough for him to stay faithful. I know

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Speaker 1: you love him, but do you love him more? Do

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Speaker 1: you love yourself more and your children more? You have

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Speaker 1: to ask yourself that question, and only you can answer

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Speaker 1: that staying in a relationship because oh I love him,

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Speaker 1: or I'm used to him, or I I have four

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Speaker 1: kids with him. In my opinion, that's not enough. Babe.

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Speaker 1: This is the only life that you get, and it

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Speaker 1: happens so quickly, and the years go by very quickly.

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Speaker 1: How do you want to spend the rest of your

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Speaker 1: life back and forth. I just don't think he has

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Speaker 1: self control. If he says, I don't know why I

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Speaker 1: do this. If you have no self control and no

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Speaker 1: discipline as a man, that's pretty heavy. Again, in my opinion,

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't be able to deal with it. It's different.

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Speaker 1: I don't have children, but even then, I've seen so

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Speaker 1: many relationships around me that stay in their marriages because

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Speaker 1: of the children. And then the children grow up and

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Speaker 1: they move out and they start their lives, and then

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Speaker 1: you're left empty, completely empty and empty shell. So you

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Speaker 1: have to think of the future, not only your future,

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Speaker 1: but your children's future, because you are said the example,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure you have daughters, but even if it's just boys,

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Speaker 1: what are you teaching them by saying in a relationship

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Speaker 1: like this. I know it's hard it's a hard decision,

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Speaker 1: which is why you came on here and asked me.

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure a lot of people around you have

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Speaker 1: probably given you the same advice, but we don't like

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Speaker 1: to hear it from people so close. So I think

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Speaker 1: you know the answer. Deep down inside. You know the answer.

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Speaker 1: But if you need me to tell you what Cheekys

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Speaker 1: would do, I would excuse myself from the situation personally,

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Speaker 1: because life is beautiful and I'm not saying that the

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Speaker 1: separation is not going to be difficult. It's going to

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Speaker 1: be difficult one hundred percent. It's going to be difficult,

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Speaker 1: but you have to choose what difficult you want. You

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Speaker 1: also said that you're emotionally withdrawn, so it's like you

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Speaker 1: have to think, got to pick my poison. It's going

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Speaker 1: to hurt either way. Do I stay and hurt or

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Speaker 1: do I leave hurt and feel free. That's something that

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Speaker 1: you have to really think about. But I already told

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Speaker 1: you what I would do. Having four children with someone,

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Speaker 1: I know it's not easy to just get up and go,

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Speaker 1: but this is your life. And when they say or

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Speaker 1: it says in the Bible somewhere I don't know where,

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Speaker 1: but where they say ayudyayue. Okay, God is saying, help yourself,

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Speaker 1: and I will help you. You have to make and

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Speaker 1: take that action step and then he will guide you

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Speaker 1: and help you. But if you stay in that, he's like, well,

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Speaker 1: that's where she wants to be. I mean, I can't

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Speaker 1: really do much about it, you know, and he's gonna

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Speaker 1: be sorry, and he's gonna beg Yeah, but you obviously

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Speaker 1: don't love me enough to stop putting your penis other places.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's just the truth, babe. I mean, straight up,

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Speaker 1: he loves you, But does he love you the way

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Speaker 1: you deserve? Does he value you and your children, your

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Speaker 1: family unit? Because if he did, he wouldn't do that

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Speaker 1: kind of shit over and over and over once. I

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Speaker 1: get okay, people make mistakes, so we can forgive, but

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Speaker 1: over and over and over and over, no, no one

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Speaker 1: deserves that.

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Speaker 3: Babe.

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Speaker 1: What do you want ten years from now, say I

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Speaker 1: stayed in this relationship and I'm older and time has passed,

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Speaker 1: and all these five ten years that I could have

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Speaker 1: just been a little happier and freer, and you're carrying that.

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Speaker 1: I could hear it in your voice. It's heavy, and

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Speaker 1: I know what that feels. Like, I'm sure you are

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Speaker 1: in bed at night crying and he's right beside you

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Speaker 1: and you feel lonely. I know the feeling. It's hard,

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Speaker 1: but when you get out of it, it is so

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Speaker 1: freeing and so liberating. Trust me, but that's just my opinion.

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Speaker 1: I will respect whatever you decide, but you know the answer,

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Speaker 1: and I know you know deep down inside. And I'm

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Speaker 1: getting chills on my body right now because I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I know it's heavy, but you came on here and

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Speaker 1: I'm always going to keep it a hundred with you.

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Speaker 1: I'm always going to keep it a hundred. I hope

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Speaker 1: that helps, babe, and please keep me updated. And if

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Speaker 1: you decide to excuse yourself from the relationship, I can

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Speaker 1: also help you and guide you on what are the

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Speaker 1: next steps because it's not going to be easy, but

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Speaker 1: you got this. It will pass. Pain doesn't last forever.

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Speaker 1: So thank you for coming on here again. Okay, guys,

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Speaker 1: moving on to Emily.

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Speaker 4: Hey, Cheeky's I am rewatching the series Mariposa. That's basically

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Speaker 4: the novella have your Mom. I'm sure you know it.

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Speaker 4: I know that a lot of things are more. How

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Speaker 4: can I say more? I don't know if it's fake

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Speaker 4: or just more dramatic, because again it is a telenovella,

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Speaker 4: but I wanted to know if majority of this stuff

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Speaker 4: was true. Like, for example, I know there's a scene

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Speaker 4: where when Mikey is born, your mom had to deliver

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Speaker 4: by herself because the hospital stuff was negligent. Was that

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Speaker 4: true or was that something that just to like, you know,

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Speaker 4: make more drama novela. There was also other stuff that

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Speaker 4: I was wondering but that was true, but I can't

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Speaker 4: really think of them right now. So just in general,

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Speaker 4: were a lot of the things like fabricated or was

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Speaker 4: most of it real things that happened?

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Speaker 1: Ooh, thank you for your question, miss Emily. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: Mari is one that I like more than a lot

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Speaker 1: of the stuff that has come out about my mom's story.

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Speaker 1: It is the closest to the truth. Again, it is

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Speaker 1: a novela, so it is over dramatized. But that part,

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Speaker 1: specifically about Mikey, I know my mom had to deliver

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Speaker 1: him alone because my dad left the hospital to go

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Speaker 1: take a nap. But my mom never believed that. She

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Speaker 1: thought that he went out to do bad things. So

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Speaker 1: when he came, my dad was not in the room.

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Speaker 1: As far as the hospital being negligent, I don't know

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Speaker 1: that to be honest, Like, I think the foundation of

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Speaker 1: it is mainly like close to reality. It's just it

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Speaker 1: was decorated with a little bit more drama and a

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Speaker 1: lot of it was just like over just done in

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Speaker 1: my opinion. But I would say seventy percent of what's

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Speaker 1: on there is the truth because they interviewed each one

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Speaker 1: of us in the family, like the Core family, like

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Speaker 1: my grandparents, my siblings, my uncles, like the Core family,

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Speaker 1: what their experience was with my mom. So that's what

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Speaker 1: they went based off of. So we were involved in

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Speaker 1: the process a little more. But yeah, I think it's

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Speaker 1: just fluffed and plushed a little bit, if you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. But I'm glad you're watching and I

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Speaker 1: hope that you're loving it or loved it. Thank you

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Speaker 1: Emily for your question. Okay, guys, last question comes from

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Speaker 1: Maria ge Geez.

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Speaker 3: First, I want to let you know how much I

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Speaker 3: admire you and your mother. Both are amazing. My question

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Speaker 3: is in regards to endometriosis. I know you have mentioned

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Speaker 3: before that you dealt with endometriosis in the past and

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Speaker 3: that you have had surgeries for this. I'm currently dealing

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Speaker 3: with it myself right now, and I'm just like so

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Speaker 3: lost with you know, dealing with this disease and what

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Speaker 3: it comes with it. Do you mind sharing, like what

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Speaker 3: you do to cope with pain with flaars, because I

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Speaker 3: see that you're always out and about and I haven't

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Speaker 3: been able to do that myself.

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Speaker 1: Hi, Maria, I'm so sorry to hear that you're not

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Speaker 1: feeling well. You know. I'll be honest, I do have endometriosis,

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Speaker 1: but I never have had a symptom well I read it.

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Speaker 1: I Mean, the only reason I know I have indometriosis

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Speaker 1: is because when I went to my fertility doctor and

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Speaker 1: we were doing the IVF process and all that, when

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Speaker 1: he went in there to remove a system my ovary,

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Speaker 1: he said, you have endometriosis all over your uterus. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what the heck is that? The first time I had

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Speaker 1: ever heard it. He's like, oh, do you have like

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Speaker 1: heavy bleeding? Do you have heavy crams? And I started

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Speaker 1: looking at the symptoms and I'm like, well, I don't

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Speaker 1: have any of that. So I've always doubted if I

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Speaker 1: have it, but I do have it. Because he's not

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Speaker 1: the only doctor that told me, I guess where it

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Speaker 1: shows up. Is it being more difficult for me to

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Speaker 1: get pregnant withindometriosis and I get poly ups and stuff

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Speaker 1: like that. But as far as the symptoms, Babe, I

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Speaker 1: don't really like have like heavy cramping or heavy bleeding

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Speaker 1: or anything like that. I will tell you this though,

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Speaker 1: I stay away from a lot of things that I've

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Speaker 1: heard can give you flare ups, certain foods, So I

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Speaker 1: would suggest for you to look that up, like what

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Speaker 1: foods to avoid, what foods actually help it? Teas A

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Speaker 1: lot of teas, herbal teas are good for endometriosis, to soothe,

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Speaker 1: heating pads are amazing. And also there is this product.

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Speaker 1: Again I'm not a doctor, so this is just a suggestion,

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Speaker 1: but I just came across it the other day. It's

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Speaker 1: called Life Purpose, okay, and it's Chinese medicine. So an

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Speaker 1: herbal tea that you put in warm water, not hot water,

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Speaker 1: and you drink it every day on an empty stomach,

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Speaker 1: and then later on a day, so it's twice a day. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: go look it up. It'll ask for your symptoms, and

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Speaker 1: it's supposed to regulate your hormones. I think another reason

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Speaker 1: why I don't get a lot of the symptoms is

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Speaker 1: because I've been doing hormone therapy for a long time.

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Speaker 1: So I do suggest you looking into that as your doctor,

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Speaker 1: as your obgyn and see what they suggest. But these

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Speaker 1: are the things that I have done and that I

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Speaker 1: think have helped me just regulate my hormones a little bit.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, look into that. I am sending you a

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Speaker 1: big hug because I have heard that it's very painful.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if like later on it's going to

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Speaker 1: like I don't know, but definitely hormones and keeping them

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Speaker 1: leveled and balance is going to help a lot. So

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Speaker 1: thank you, Maria, and I hope that you feel better soon, babe,

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Speaker 1: because yeah, anything that has to do with our reproductive

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Speaker 1: area is always just so sensitive and a vulnerable thing

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Speaker 1: to talk about. So thank you for trusting me too.

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Speaker 1: Do you know answer your question? Na? Thank you guys,

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Speaker 1: thank you for listening, Thank you for being here. I

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Speaker 1: love you, I appreciate you. And again, if you have

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Speaker 1: a question, I am here for you. Okay, you can

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Speaker 1: leave it at speakpipe dot com, slash Cheeky's and Chill podcast,

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Speaker 1: and I promise to do my best to give you

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Speaker 1: the best advice always Okay, catch you on the next one.

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Speaker 2: H