WEBVTT - I wish I could but I'll be working

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is that work is a perfectly good reason to

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<v Speaker 1>decline to do something. Even if you work flexibly, no

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<v Speaker 1>one else is going to protect your work hours for you.

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<v Speaker 1>If you are serious about doing big things, then you

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<v Speaker 1>need enough space to work. So if someone works full

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<v Speaker 1>time in an office, most people understand that they will

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<v Speaker 1>not be readily available for certain things. When the neighbors

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<v Speaker 1>dog walker cancels, they do not ask if you can

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<v Speaker 1>cover if they know that you are sitting in an

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<v Speaker 1>office thirty minutes away. Men who work full time in particular,

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<v Speaker 1>seem not to attract these sorts of requests. I know

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<v Speaker 1>from stories people send me that even if the male

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<v Speaker 1>half of a two parent family is listed as the

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<v Speaker 1>first contact for the school, the school will often still

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<v Speaker 1>call the woman because it's assumed that the man is

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<v Speaker 1>working and can't be interrupted. Mom, on the other hand,

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<v Speaker 1>is free game. This is of course frustrating in families

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<v Speaker 1>where mom is working far less flexibly than dad, but

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<v Speaker 1>cultural assumptions can run pretty deep. Now, I would note

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<v Speaker 1>that even so called not flexible work turns out to

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<v Speaker 1>be more flexible than people often think. It was once

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<v Speaker 1>assumed that medicine wasn't flexible at all. When women became

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<v Speaker 1>a higher percentage of physicians, all of a sudden, people

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<v Speaker 1>started writing think pieces about medicine being a flexible career.

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<v Speaker 1>In a lot of cases, people who work full time

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<v Speaker 1>in offices could in fact volunteer somewhere during the day,

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<v Speaker 1>or pick someone up from the airport or run a carpool.

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<v Speaker 1>It would just be inconvenient, and they might need to

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<v Speaker 1>explain themselves, and what they're being asked to do is

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<v Speaker 1>not as high a priority as the inconvenience they would face.

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<v Speaker 1>Work provides a ready reason to say no that people

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<v Speaker 1>don't really question. Hence, the existence of work often keeps

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<v Speaker 1>these requests from ever even bubbling to the surface. Even

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<v Speaker 1>if you work flexibly, though this can still be the case,

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<v Speaker 1>the inconvenience factor or the opportunity cost feels bigger to

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<v Speaker 1>you than doing whatever it is that people think you

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<v Speaker 1>can do. If morning hours are your most productive hours

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<v Speaker 1>of the day, then just because you theoretically could drive

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<v Speaker 1>your kids to school every morning doesn't mean you should.

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<v Speaker 1>Just because you theoretically could do a dentist appointment at

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<v Speaker 1>ten a m. Doesn't mean you should. The dentist probably

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<v Speaker 1>offers other appointments that are not during your peak productive times.

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<v Speaker 1>So if they call and ask if you can move

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<v Speaker 1>yours will you'll be working. They need to find a

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<v Speaker 1>different spot that works for you. If someone asks you

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<v Speaker 1>to do something at a time when you would like

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<v Speaker 1>to be working, you can simply announce that you can't,

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<v Speaker 1>even if you do not have something scheduled at that moment.

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<v Speaker 1>This is time that you can use for long term projects,

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<v Speaker 1>or to pitch new work, or to reach out to people,

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<v Speaker 1>or to think. Those may all be more valuable to

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<v Speaker 1>you than whatever else you could theoretically be doing. If

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<v Speaker 1>you like, you can use the phrase I wish I could,

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<v Speaker 1>but I'll be working even if you are not on

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<v Speaker 1>the clock, even if you don't have a scheduled meeting,

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<v Speaker 1>even if you don't have a looming deadline. It is

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<v Speaker 1>absolutely valid to protect your worktime. Frankly, it may be

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<v Speaker 1>even more important to protect your worktime if you work flexibly,

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<v Speaker 1>because no one else is going to protect it for you.

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<v Speaker 1>If the little white lie of claiming you are wishing

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<v Speaker 1>to do whatever it is doesn't sit well, and I'll

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<v Speaker 1>admit that it doesn't really for me. Then skip that

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<v Speaker 1>part of the statement. You can simply say I'll be

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<v Speaker 1>working or sorry, that doesn't work, I'll be working now.

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<v Speaker 1>Of course, there are exceptions, as there are for people

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<v Speaker 1>in offices too. If a close fender family member has

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<v Speaker 1>an emergency and needs you, you want to be there

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<v Speaker 1>for them. But I would use the same standards if

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<v Speaker 1>you work flexibly, as if you worked in an office

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<v Speaker 1>and had to ask your boss's permission to tend to

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<v Speaker 1>an urgent matter, it would need to be a really

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<v Speaker 1>good reason. For other cases, if you were planning to work,

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<v Speaker 1>you can just decline your work is valid even if

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't look exactly like other people's work. It still

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<v Speaker 1>takes time and your time is valuable in the meantime.

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura, Thanks for listening to making the most

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<v Speaker 1>of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If

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<v Speaker 1>you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me

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<v Speaker 1>at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is

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<v Speaker 1>a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please

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