1 00:00:05,160 --> 00:00:09,240 Speaker 1: Welcome to This Country Life. I'm your host, Brent Reeves 2 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:13,680 Speaker 1: from coon hunting to trot lining and just general country living. 3 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:16,040 Speaker 1: I want you to stay a while as I share 4 00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:18,479 Speaker 1: my stories and the country skills that will help you 5 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:22,360 Speaker 1: beat the system. This Country Life is proudly presented as 6 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:25,880 Speaker 1: part of Meat Eaters Podcast Network, bringing you the best 7 00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 1: outdoor podcast the airways have to offer. All right, friends, 8 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:33,080 Speaker 1: pull you up a chair or drop that tailgate. I 9 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:34,760 Speaker 1: think I got a thing or two and teach you 10 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: messing with critters. We are a curious species. That curiosity 11 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:48,040 Speaker 1: fuels the desire to find out what's on the other 12 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:51,840 Speaker 1: side of the mountain, the river, the ocean, and ultimately 13 00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:57,000 Speaker 1: the universe. Unfortunately, it also makes us wonder, what do 14 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,480 Speaker 1: you reckon that sleeping tiger will do? If I've pokem 15 00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: with this, I said we were curious and not smart. 16 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,800 Speaker 1: It's all about messing with critics this week. But first, 17 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:18,039 Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you a story. Hurricane Katrina was 18 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 1: a Category five hurricane. The cost of lives and loss 19 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:25,600 Speaker 1: is still being felt today, and I was in charge 20 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:28,760 Speaker 1: of a group of highly motivated individuals I had brought 21 00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:32,679 Speaker 1: from the Union County Sheriff's Office in Elderde, Arkansas on 22 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:38,319 Speaker 1: a mutual aid mission supporting Louisiana Sheriff's Association. We were 23 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:42,319 Speaker 1: allocated to the Jefferson pair of Sheriff's Office initially, then 24 00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:46,880 Speaker 1: after the initial chaos immediately following the storms, we moved 25 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:50,120 Speaker 1: across Lake Pont Train with the Saint Tammany pair of 26 00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:54,400 Speaker 1: Sheriff's Office. Slight El, Louisiana would be our home for 27 00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:58,040 Speaker 1: a few weeks to come. It was a desperate time 28 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:01,360 Speaker 1: for a lot of folks and us included. The conditions 29 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:05,160 Speaker 1: were poor, stress and danger were high, and ships were 30 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:09,720 Speaker 1: long and unended. But when it would eventually end, we 31 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:13,359 Speaker 1: all had homes and families to go home to. A 32 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,160 Speaker 1: lot of the local officers who we were serving alongside 33 00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:20,200 Speaker 1: they weren't that fortunate, but our mission was clear. We 34 00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 1: were front site, focused on the stolen order and a 35 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:28,960 Speaker 1: chaotic mess of lawlessness and devastation. A week after we'd 36 00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:32,800 Speaker 1: relocated to Slide Done, we started doing marine patrols and 37 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 1: we were teamed up with some Alabama National guardsmen and 38 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:41,200 Speaker 1: I was assigned two of Alabama's finest specialist lord and 39 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:45,120 Speaker 1: private clerk. We were running Big Bay boats that were 40 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:48,400 Speaker 1: part of the Sheriff's Office fleet, and our main mission 41 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:51,079 Speaker 1: was to patrol along the banks the Lake pont train, 42 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,400 Speaker 1: keeping an eye on the property and houses that were 43 00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:57,120 Speaker 1: left and forcing the curfew to try and curb the looting. 44 00:02:58,320 --> 00:03:01,200 Speaker 1: By this time, almost everything could set it down pretty well, 45 00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:03,640 Speaker 1: and our calls for action were few and far between. 46 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:07,640 Speaker 1: Down on the water now. The one thing that hadn't 47 00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:11,600 Speaker 1: slowed down was the duty. Twelve hour shifts from sundown 48 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:15,520 Speaker 1: to sun up. They can be long and long time 49 00:03:15,639 --> 00:03:17,440 Speaker 1: for a bunch of folks that have been in the 50 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 1: thick of it for weeks at a time. The calls 51 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:23,160 Speaker 1: went from stacked up one behind the other to almost 52 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,920 Speaker 1: zero around the lake homes and the condos and the marinas. 53 00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:31,960 Speaker 1: It was boring. It was necessary, but it was boring, 54 00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,120 Speaker 1: like we need to figure out something to do to 55 00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 1: pass the time while we patrolled amongst the floating logs 56 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 1: lumbered alligators. Alligators, that's something we can do. Let's make 57 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,240 Speaker 1: a contest to see which patrol boat can find and 58 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:53,400 Speaker 1: photograph the biggest gator. That was fun for about two nights. 59 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:56,360 Speaker 1: Then it got to be an argument over who saw 60 00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: the biggest one because the majority of the time we 61 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:04,320 Speaker 1: were comparing photographs of glowing eyes and gaiterorheads and how 62 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,400 Speaker 1: you going to sell that? Aregu well? I had a solution. 63 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:10,880 Speaker 1: We all met just before dark at the marina to 64 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:15,000 Speaker 1: link up with our guardsmen from Alabama. Now there I 65 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 1: informed everyone that what we were going to do to 66 00:04:17,839 --> 00:04:21,160 Speaker 1: settle once and for all whose gator was biggest. We 67 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:24,160 Speaker 1: had a twelve hour shift and if the call volume 68 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:28,200 Speaker 1: stayed low while we patrolled our sectors, we were also 69 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:31,359 Speaker 1: going to catch the biggest gator. We could let a 70 00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:35,320 Speaker 1: tape measure beside it and see who won. Now we'd 71 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: all watch Steve Irwin catch him on TV. How hard 72 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:43,039 Speaker 1: could it be and what could possibly go wrong? Everyone 73 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,120 Speaker 1: thought it was a great idea. We were doing team 74 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:48,920 Speaker 1: building with our counterparts from the Yellowhammer State, blowing off 75 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:52,359 Speaker 1: some steam, taking a break after some long days and 76 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:56,960 Speaker 1: weeks of seeing the worst of mother nature. See in 77 00:04:57,040 --> 00:05:00,240 Speaker 1: twelve hours, chumps was the last thing I said before 78 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:03,640 Speaker 1: we all divided up. An hour or so into our 79 00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:06,840 Speaker 1: patrol assignment, we started seeing the sized gators we were 80 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:11,599 Speaker 1: after big ones. Lord and Clark made a catch pole 81 00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:15,240 Speaker 1: out of some floating lumber and repurposed wire. One end 82 00:05:15,320 --> 00:05:17,159 Speaker 1: was attached to the end of the pole and formed 83 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:19,359 Speaker 1: a loop that we could slip over the gators snout, 84 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:22,680 Speaker 1: pull it tight, keeping his mouth closed, and then haul 85 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:25,880 Speaker 1: his behind in the boat for a measurement or picture. 86 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,839 Speaker 1: After that, we'd cut him loose to go back to 87 00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: doing what gators do. But the big ones, they don't 88 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:37,240 Speaker 1: get big being dumb, and they don't get big by 89 00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:40,760 Speaker 1: letting folks lay their mits on them. Time after time 90 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:43,680 Speaker 1: we'd slip up on a qualified candidate, only to have 91 00:05:43,839 --> 00:05:46,599 Speaker 1: him slip beneath the surface of the water and disappear 92 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:50,839 Speaker 1: the instant the wire touched his snout. Now we'd located 93 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:53,200 Speaker 1: some prime target, some we guessed to be in excess 94 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:56,240 Speaker 1: of nine or ten feet long. Now do you guess 95 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:58,760 Speaker 1: the length of an alligator With all you can see 96 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:03,040 Speaker 1: is his head, you you estimate the number of inches 97 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:06,840 Speaker 1: from between his eyes down to his nostrils. Now that 98 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,440 Speaker 1: estimate in the inches will be pretty close to his 99 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:14,120 Speaker 1: total length and feet. Ten inches from eyes to nose 100 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:19,480 Speaker 1: equals ten foot of alligator in mississippiansas the American alligator. 101 00:06:21,520 --> 00:06:24,040 Speaker 1: It was one fiddle to temp after another. However, and 102 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:26,719 Speaker 1: had we been stalking them on the ground. I feel 103 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:29,480 Speaker 1: confident we could have stood a better chance at putting 104 00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:32,120 Speaker 1: one and a half Nelson long enough to tape him 105 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:35,440 Speaker 1: out and take his picture floating up to him with 106 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 1: the limited reach of our Catchupole just wasn't doing the trick. Now, 107 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:44,479 Speaker 1: in retrospect, I'm more confident that this story would be 108 00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:47,400 Speaker 1: a whole lot different than the one I'm telling now 109 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 1: had we had the opportunity to wrestle one into submission 110 00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:56,840 Speaker 1: on dry ground. I'm forever thankful that opportunity never arose. 111 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,120 Speaker 1: But a few hours in the radio crackled on the 112 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:04,279 Speaker 1: scramble channel that we used to say things that didn't 113 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: need to go out under the scanners, Not that any 114 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:10,200 Speaker 1: one was around to listen, but regardless, we needed to 115 00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:13,880 Speaker 1: at least present a modicum of professionalism to our counterparts. 116 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:18,440 Speaker 1: Here's what was transmitted. Bravo one is the Sierra one 117 00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:25,800 Speaker 1: Alpha four certified. I responded Roger that Sierra one, All right, 118 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 1: let me explain. Bravo one was my call sign. Sierra 119 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:33,280 Speaker 1: one was the call sign of my teammate at point 120 00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:36,200 Speaker 1: man who was running the boat we were competing against. 121 00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:42,200 Speaker 1: His name was Greg Stevenson. Alpha stood for alligator, and 122 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 1: four meant that he was four foot long and certified 123 00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 1: minute they'd stretched him out and measured him and got 124 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,800 Speaker 1: a picture. Now all we had to beat was four feet. 125 00:07:50,920 --> 00:07:54,680 Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? We were actively hunting gaters over 126 00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,640 Speaker 1: eight feet long. I'd caught a baby that was about 127 00:07:57,640 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 1: two feet long that I had riding in the boat 128 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:03,360 Speaker 1: with me for half a shift the night before. This 129 00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:06,360 Speaker 1: was gonna be easy, all right, boys, you heard him. 130 00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 1: Next gator we see that's at least six foot long. 131 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:11,440 Speaker 1: We're snatching him up out of the water and putting 132 00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 1: an end of this contest. Pressure was off. We didn't 133 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:17,720 Speaker 1: have to mess with the big ones that were slipping 134 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: away as fast as we slipped it up on him. 135 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 1: We're hunting yearlings. Now we might as well be robbing 136 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:25,320 Speaker 1: him out of the baby bed. The next one we 137 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:27,800 Speaker 1: see is getting kidnapped, just for practice. If he ain't 138 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:30,080 Speaker 1: over six and a half feet, he's going back in 139 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:33,560 Speaker 1: the water till we find one that is three of 140 00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:35,720 Speaker 1: us scan the surface of the water is close and 141 00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:39,040 Speaker 1: calculated for a decent sized gator. As we had been 142 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 1: looking for looters. It wasn't long when one of my 143 00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:45,600 Speaker 1: soldiers said, there's one about six foot. We can warm 144 00:08:45,679 --> 00:08:48,040 Speaker 1: up on him if you want. I told him to 145 00:08:48,040 --> 00:08:50,080 Speaker 1: get the stuff ready, and I eased the boat over 146 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:51,840 Speaker 1: to where he was floating in the middle of a 147 00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 1: cove amongst smaller gators and the rest of the stuff 148 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 1: that used to be part of the neighborhood. The stuff 149 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: that they had to get ready was only a call 150 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:04,000 Speaker 1: and a yardstick that we'd found a roll of black 151 00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:06,120 Speaker 1: electrical tape that we were going to use to tape 152 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:09,079 Speaker 1: his mouth shut once we got him in the boat. Now, 153 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:12,320 Speaker 1: everything in our world was timed. Our shifts were calculated 154 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:16,200 Speaker 1: in hours, our fuel consumption on how long we sat 155 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,920 Speaker 1: at idle, and how fast we drove from one patrol 156 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:22,960 Speaker 1: area to the next, how fast we safely clear the building. 157 00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:26,400 Speaker 1: During training or in reality, it was a habit of 158 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,480 Speaker 1: subconsciously estimating the time it took for us to clear 159 00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:35,600 Speaker 1: an obstacle or accomplish an objective twenty seconds, twenty seconds 160 00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:38,280 Speaker 1: from the time we pulled the wire tight around his 161 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:43,080 Speaker 1: jaws until we were ready to start taking pictures. That's 162 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:48,839 Speaker 1: what I estimated it was going to be. Clockwork. Clark 163 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,840 Speaker 1: dropped the loop on that gater's mouth like he had 164 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:52,920 Speaker 1: been doing it all his life, and one big pull, 165 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 1: he and Lord snatched that gator in the boat, just 166 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,679 Speaker 1: like we played. I couldn't believe how easy it is. 167 00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:02,640 Speaker 1: It's gonna be. The clock had started the plan. Once 168 00:10:02,679 --> 00:10:04,319 Speaker 1: we had him in the boat, Lord would lay on 169 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:07,079 Speaker 1: top of him, grab both sides of his mouth, holding 170 00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:10,400 Speaker 1: and closed. Clark would hold steady pressure on the wire 171 00:10:10,480 --> 00:10:13,160 Speaker 1: noose and catch pole while I ran a few rounds 172 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:16,839 Speaker 1: of tape around his jaws to keep them shut. The 173 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:19,440 Speaker 1: amount of force required to hold of a gator's mouth 174 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,480 Speaker 1: shut is minimal compared to the mouth they exert when 175 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,840 Speaker 1: closing it, and that's around three hundred pounds per square inch. 176 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:29,760 Speaker 1: They'll leave a mark on him. Over our fool proof plan, 177 00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:34,679 Speaker 1: he wouldn't have a chance. I threw the throttle in 178 00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:37,600 Speaker 1: the neutral and was halfway around the console and going 179 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,839 Speaker 1: to my knees with the table. When the soldiers hauled 180 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:43,160 Speaker 1: that dinosaur into the boat and the wire came loose 181 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:48,560 Speaker 1: from his mouth, time seemed to slow to a crawl. 182 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:52,439 Speaker 1: I was moving in slow motion. Clark and Lord were 183 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:56,480 Speaker 1: moving in slow motion. Everything was like it was covered 184 00:10:56,520 --> 00:11:01,080 Speaker 1: in molasses, except the gator. He was making laps inside 185 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,319 Speaker 1: our boat so fast that when you jumped over him 186 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:05,679 Speaker 1: as he went under before you feed it at the deck, 187 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:08,840 Speaker 1: he was coming around again. And this seemed to go 188 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:11,920 Speaker 1: on forever. Now. I don't know how many laps I 189 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:14,840 Speaker 1: Joker made inside that boat, but I do know that 190 00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:17,640 Speaker 1: I was about to give out from jumping over him 191 00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:21,360 Speaker 1: every time he cruised through the straightaway before going low 192 00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:24,920 Speaker 1: into turn three. But where are we going to go? 193 00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:27,520 Speaker 1: There was only one of him in the boat with us, 194 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 1: and a whole bunch of him out of the boat 195 00:11:30,559 --> 00:11:34,439 Speaker 1: in the water where I momentarily thought about going. Then, 196 00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:37,880 Speaker 1: when all hope was lost, Specialist Lord dove on him 197 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:40,160 Speaker 1: like a whole boat catching the last train out of town. 198 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:44,440 Speaker 1: Wham hold, we got him. Clark held his mouth shutting. 199 00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 1: I ran a half a roll of tape around his jaws. 200 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:53,840 Speaker 1: We had him caught. Finally we measured him, and then 201 00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 1: the Great Gator Catching Contest of two thousand and five 202 00:11:57,559 --> 00:12:01,240 Speaker 1: we'd won. We tried half the night to catch one 203 00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:04,600 Speaker 1: over eight feet. The one we caught was six foot either. 204 00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:08,800 Speaker 1: Then the grands came of alligators. He was just a puff. 205 00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:13,040 Speaker 1: But had he been six foot and one inch I 206 00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,960 Speaker 1: firmly believe he had killed us all and that's just 207 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:29,360 Speaker 1: how that happened, messing with critters. Every year, the headlines 208 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,400 Speaker 1: from Yellowstone National Park make their way around the outdoor 209 00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:37,600 Speaker 1: channels of social media. There the internet, wildlife experts comment 210 00:12:37,679 --> 00:12:41,880 Speaker 1: on how dumb folks from other countries, the inebriated residents 211 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:45,040 Speaker 1: of this one and the seemingly ignorant get a lesson 212 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:49,120 Speaker 1: in mess around and find out. It's become quite a 213 00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 1: spectator sport. Watching the unsuspected get a lesson in the 214 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:57,600 Speaker 1: transference of kinetic energy science can be fun, especially when 215 00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,520 Speaker 1: the lab experiment as someone walking up to take a 216 00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:04,320 Speaker 1: selfie with a bison, one smiling click later and they're 217 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:06,400 Speaker 1: texting for a ride to the er from where they 218 00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:10,840 Speaker 1: landed in the next zip code. I've watched so many 219 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:15,000 Speaker 1: compilation videos of foreigners and residents alike getting theled one 220 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:18,520 Speaker 1: to two from a seemingly tamed bison that even though 221 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:22,440 Speaker 1: I know what's coming, I can't turn away until I 222 00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:26,760 Speaker 1: see with my own eyes the frontier. Justice has been dispensed. 223 00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,280 Speaker 1: You've been found guilty of buffoonery in the northern portion 224 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:33,720 Speaker 1: of the Montana West, and your sentence is a permanent 225 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:37,240 Speaker 1: hitch in your get along and the embarrassing video clip 226 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:39,400 Speaker 1: that will haunt you for the rest of your days. 227 00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:46,040 Speaker 1: Court adjourned. Forty seven thousand people each year seek medical 228 00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:49,720 Speaker 1: treatment for being bitten or attacked by wild animals, with 229 00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:54,080 Speaker 1: an average of eight each year being fatal. Now, if 230 00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:58,360 Speaker 1: you count domesticated animals, that number claims to one million 231 00:13:58,400 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 1: attacks or bites. Cows of all things send twenty folks 232 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:06,400 Speaker 1: a year. To the last roundup, a bunch of nerds 233 00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:08,840 Speaker 1: down at the CDC got together and they found that 234 00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:12,520 Speaker 1: from two thousand and eight to twenty fifteen, there was 235 00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:16,840 Speaker 1: one thousand, six hundred and ten animal related fatalities in 236 00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:20,360 Speaker 1: the US, with the majority of the deaths being the 237 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:24,680 Speaker 1: result of encounters with non venomous animals like fifty seven percent. 238 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:31,120 Speaker 1: One of the researchers is quoted as saying, importedly, most 239 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:36,880 Speaker 1: deaths are not actually due to wild animals like mountain lions, wolves, bears, sharks, 240 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:40,720 Speaker 1: et cetera, but are a result of deadly encounters with 241 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:46,240 Speaker 1: farm animals, allergic reactions from b wash for hornet stings, 242 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,800 Speaker 1: and dog attacks. So while it is important that people 243 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:52,560 Speaker 1: recreating in the wilderness know what to do when they 244 00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:57,200 Speaker 1: encounter a potentially dangerous animal. The actual risk of death 245 00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:02,560 Speaker 1: is quite low. The good doctor forgot about the idiot 246 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,440 Speaker 1: factor and the additional encounters brought to you by what 247 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 1: made Milwaukee famous. Now, I'm no scientist or researcher or 248 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:14,400 Speaker 1: even a gambler, but I am an observer, and I 249 00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:17,920 Speaker 1: made a living and stayed alive by watching folks engaging 250 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:21,400 Speaker 1: if they were friends or foe. By watching those the pesture, 251 00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:24,720 Speaker 1: the huge harry prairie cows. I'm not coming away with 252 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:28,680 Speaker 1: much in the friend or fol category. I'm also not 253 00:15:28,760 --> 00:15:30,960 Speaker 1: getting the impression that a lot of country folks are 254 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 1: walking up to the Native American symbol of abundance and 255 00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:38,400 Speaker 1: prosperity for a close and personal TikTok video and winding 256 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:41,840 Speaker 1: up meeting their yearly insurance deductible in one visit at 257 00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:46,360 Speaker 1: the local trauma center. Now, on the other hand, it 258 00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:49,760 Speaker 1: was the country board by which all my qualifying standards 259 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:54,880 Speaker 1: and qualifications for being one that thought catching a copperhead 260 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:58,920 Speaker 1: was a good idea. Remember him. I won't say his name, 261 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:02,200 Speaker 1: but his initials are me. He now, being from the 262 00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:06,040 Speaker 1: country and being familiar with livestock and wild creatures doesn't 263 00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:10,680 Speaker 1: vaccinate you from poor decision making. On the contrary, sometimes 264 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:13,840 Speaker 1: it gives you a false sense of natural ability, and 265 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,760 Speaker 1: not being scared of something is not a qualifier for 266 00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:20,800 Speaker 1: interacting with it. Case in point, a friend of mine 267 00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 1: from out west, This fellow who shall remain nameless, is 268 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:28,200 Speaker 1: a large lad. He's the kind of guy that you'd 269 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:31,120 Speaker 1: think fear would be the last of his worries. But snakes, 270 00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:34,720 Speaker 1: snakes of any kind, would run him up a locust tree. 271 00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:38,160 Speaker 1: But being scared of snakes isn't really a big deal. 272 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:41,880 Speaker 1: There's a name for it, O if he die. Phobia 273 00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:45,720 Speaker 1: in one study says that Americans fierce snakes more than 274 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:50,840 Speaker 1: anything else. It's fifty six percent numero uno on the 275 00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:55,400 Speaker 1: spooky chart. No idea where badger's ranking that chart, but 276 00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:59,280 Speaker 1: they should have been higher on his. He told me 277 00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:01,640 Speaker 1: by the time, many moons ago, that his dog made 278 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,600 Speaker 1: a badger up in some sage brush. They were out 279 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:07,320 Speaker 1: hunting sheds when the incident occurred, and my friend was 280 00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:10,760 Speaker 1: sands any type of firearm with which to dispatch it. 281 00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:13,359 Speaker 1: Now before he didn't want to get the drawers in 282 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,720 Speaker 1: a wad. The state where this happened, had an open 283 00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:18,040 Speaker 1: season on badgers. They could be one hundred year round, 284 00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:22,000 Speaker 1: and this dude wanted one for the fur. He'd always 285 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:25,640 Speaker 1: fancied himself some sort of mountain man, and a badger 286 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:29,680 Speaker 1: skinned hat was his top priority. His dog had cornered 287 00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:31,840 Speaker 1: him up a badger. And even though he didn't have 288 00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:34,439 Speaker 1: a gun, he did have a big knife and a 289 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:38,240 Speaker 1: leather scabbard on his belt. He had it on every 290 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:40,760 Speaker 1: time I ever saw him, and he kept it sharp 291 00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:44,159 Speaker 1: as a razor, he told me, And he said, I 292 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,199 Speaker 1: just decided to wait in there with my knife and 293 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:49,760 Speaker 1: stab back badger, skin him out, tan his hide, and 294 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:55,040 Speaker 1: make me a hat. Now, remember when I was talking 295 00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:59,320 Speaker 1: about noticing things in my former career. It became a 296 00:17:59,359 --> 00:18:03,160 Speaker 1: habit that helped me make it to retirement and mostly 297 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:09,280 Speaker 1: unscathed by doing so. I do it to this day subconsciously. Well, 298 00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:12,040 Speaker 1: while he was telling me that story, I noticed that 299 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:15,320 Speaker 1: as he told it and mentioned the knife, he touched 300 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:18,080 Speaker 1: the handle of it as it hung on his belt, 301 00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:21,600 Speaker 1: just as it had been ever since I'd met him. 302 00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 1: Every time he mentioned the badger of the hat, he 303 00:18:25,119 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 1: looked at his left arm. I'll spare you the details, 304 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:32,080 Speaker 1: but my friend's attempt at take in a badger's fur 305 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:36,240 Speaker 1: by stabbing him it didn't work out. As he maneuvered 306 00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:39,320 Speaker 1: in to take a stab, the badger latched hold of 307 00:18:39,320 --> 00:18:42,880 Speaker 1: my pal's favorite arm on his left side and proceeded 308 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:45,119 Speaker 1: to gnaw and claw it down to the white parts. 309 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:49,560 Speaker 1: That all the meat was attached to nine stitches a 310 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,800 Speaker 1: second is what we figured it out to be in 311 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:54,680 Speaker 1: the end, and he hung on for thirty six offs 312 00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:59,400 Speaker 1: stitches that is not seconds. He showed me the scars 313 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,600 Speaker 1: and I said he did all that in four seconds. 314 00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:04,600 Speaker 1: He looked at me with his eyes as big as 315 00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:07,840 Speaker 1: saucers and said, calmly, I think he did it in 316 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,720 Speaker 1: one second. It took me three to get him shook 317 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:13,520 Speaker 1: off in about thirty more for the squealing to stop. 318 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,480 Speaker 1: I said, they squeal in that attack, and he said, no, 319 00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,359 Speaker 1: I was doing this squill. I sounded like my little 320 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:24,399 Speaker 1: girl when she sees a spider messing with critters, and 321 00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:30,199 Speaker 1: it'll turn grown in into little girls speaking to little girls. 322 00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:33,639 Speaker 1: When my littlest girl was five, we had a pet 323 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:38,080 Speaker 1: coon and we named him Buster. I gotten him from 324 00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,920 Speaker 1: a friend of ours that we went to church with. 325 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:43,080 Speaker 1: She's a vettech. And if there was ever a real 326 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:48,520 Speaker 1: life showed up Ellie May Clampett, it's Madeline. Madeline is 327 00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:51,560 Speaker 1: as pretty as they get inside and out. She and 328 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:53,960 Speaker 1: her husband are good country folks, with horses and the 329 00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,280 Speaker 1: usual animals you'll see on a small country farm. And 330 00:19:57,359 --> 00:20:00,440 Speaker 1: at one time she had a squad of tame uns 331 00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:03,639 Speaker 1: living his pets in their barn. She was telling me 332 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:05,640 Speaker 1: about them one day at church, and I told her 333 00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,760 Speaker 1: that if she ever came across an extra one, that 334 00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:12,320 Speaker 1: I wanted it for Bailey and for me. I told 335 00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:16,440 Speaker 1: Alexis about our conversation my wife, and she didn't seem 336 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:19,640 Speaker 1: overly excited about getting a pet coon. She also didn't 337 00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:25,440 Speaker 1: seem overly confident that I'd get one. Well, she thought poorly. 338 00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,840 Speaker 1: A few weeks later, someone brought in an orphan kitt 339 00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:33,040 Speaker 1: and coon to the veterinarian's office for maddling work, and 340 00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:36,680 Speaker 1: she called me, does Bailey still want a baby coon? Yes, 341 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:41,240 Speaker 1: definitely still wants a baby coon. Bailey does. Okay, I'm 342 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:45,600 Speaker 1: coming y'all's way and I'll drop him off. Twenty minutes later, 343 00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:49,679 Speaker 1: I was cradling a baby boy Bandido and bottle feeding 344 00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:54,280 Speaker 1: him some kitten milk replacement. Alexis picked Bailey up from 345 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,399 Speaker 1: school and when they walked in surprise, y'all meet her 346 00:20:57,440 --> 00:21:02,840 Speaker 1: new baby Bailey and immedily reached for him and squeezed 347 00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:07,359 Speaker 1: him tight. Alexis immediately reached for me and squeezed me tight, 348 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:11,120 Speaker 1: mainly my neck, concentrating on the part where the air 349 00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:15,199 Speaker 1: goes in and out. She got over it, and Bailey 350 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:18,560 Speaker 1: and I named him Buster. Now. Buster was a curious 351 00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:21,119 Speaker 1: little guy, as one would figure baby coon would be 352 00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:24,240 Speaker 1: if he wasn't a sleeper eating from a bottle. He's 353 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:29,200 Speaker 1: crawling all over us and creation. He and Bailey played together, 354 00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:31,240 Speaker 1: and I'd sit on the steps or in front of 355 00:21:31,280 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 1: the house and watch her running up and down the 356 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:37,439 Speaker 1: sidewalk with Buster and tow doing everything he could to 357 00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:41,320 Speaker 1: keep up with her. Bailey was learning to ride her bicycle, 358 00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:44,000 Speaker 1: and before we took her training wheels off, Buster would 359 00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:47,240 Speaker 1: sit and ride in her basket or follow her down 360 00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:52,760 Speaker 1: the street and back. They were buddies. A month after 361 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:55,400 Speaker 1: two thirds of us welcomed the Buster into our home, 362 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:59,119 Speaker 1: I left for bear hunting trip in Idaho. I'd been 363 00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:02,240 Speaker 1: the main character and clean her up her After Buster, 364 00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:06,120 Speaker 1: Bailey helped some, but she was also five, and while 365 00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:08,240 Speaker 1: she was most likely the more mature of the two 366 00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:12,480 Speaker 1: of us, it was still ultimately my responsibility, and when 367 00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:18,400 Speaker 1: I left, the duty fell on Alexis, both figuratively and literally. 368 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:25,159 Speaker 1: Buster Buster either struggled with incontinence or he had no shame, 369 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:29,119 Speaker 1: and I leaned toward the latter. Either way. If you 370 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:32,320 Speaker 1: think kitting milk replacement smells bad when you mix it up, 371 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:35,240 Speaker 1: you should get a whiff of it after it filters 372 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 1: through a coon named Buster that only moments ago was 373 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:43,119 Speaker 1: sitting peacefully on your shoulder when nature came calling. That 374 00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,360 Speaker 1: smell would drive a buzzer and off a gut wagon. 375 00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:49,000 Speaker 1: I checked in with Alexis to see how they were doing. 376 00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:52,440 Speaker 1: When I got a little signal on our hunt, Alexis 377 00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:54,760 Speaker 1: told me that she'd said something earlier in the day 378 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:59,080 Speaker 1: that she'd never dreamed she would say. She said there 379 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:01,640 Speaker 1: was no way any one could have ever convinced her, 380 00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:05,240 Speaker 1: even two months ago, which was still seven years into 381 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,960 Speaker 1: her indoctrination in the world of hunting dogs, dead animals, 382 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: and everything else that she was happily ignorant of until 383 00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:16,679 Speaker 1: she met me. She said, I couldn't have never imagined 384 00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:20,800 Speaker 1: me saying, Bailey, it's starting to rain, get your coon, 385 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:24,320 Speaker 1: we're going in the house. But I said that very 386 00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,440 Speaker 1: thing today as we sat on the front steps of 387 00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:30,320 Speaker 1: our home. Brand Brent, I love you, but I have 388 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:36,240 Speaker 1: no idea how I got here me either, Honey, just lucky. 389 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 1: I guess. We kept busting until he got big enough 390 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:41,960 Speaker 1: to take care of himself, and I purposely left his 391 00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:44,879 Speaker 1: sleeping cage open one night and he left and he 392 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:48,560 Speaker 1: never came back. He started to get a little rough 393 00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,000 Speaker 1: and I didn't want him hurting Bailey even on accident. 394 00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,919 Speaker 1: We miss him, and we have some fond memories and 395 00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:58,200 Speaker 1: some of the cutest pictures and videos of that Rascal 396 00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:02,920 Speaker 1: and Bailey that I share on Instagram. Messing with critters 397 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:07,399 Speaker 1: can be fun and entertaining, but it's best on both sides. 398 00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:11,800 Speaker 1: Enjoy it. I'm gonna post some pictures of the winning gater, 399 00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:14,640 Speaker 1: me and the boys from the Alabama National Guard hemmed 400 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,800 Speaker 1: up in the boat on Lake Ponta train nineteen years ago. 401 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:21,520 Speaker 1: If anyone recognizes those guys, get in touch with me. 402 00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:25,199 Speaker 1: I'd love to talk to them. Y'all keep sending in 403 00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:28,199 Speaker 1: the stories to me and Rebel and let's focus on 404 00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,639 Speaker 1: things that are funny or amazing that happened to you 405 00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:34,160 Speaker 1: and yours while no outdoors, we got some really good 406 00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,199 Speaker 1: ones and we're planning on doing some new things I 407 00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:40,880 Speaker 1: think you'll enjoy in the near future. School's almost out. 408 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 1: Time to get them youngins out of the house and 409 00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,080 Speaker 1: into nature. That's just as important a place for them 410 00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:49,280 Speaker 1: to learn as any. They'll be taking over one day 411 00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,520 Speaker 1: to make sure they got some sense when they do. 412 00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:56,600 Speaker 1: Until next week. This is Bret Reeves signing off. Y'all 413 00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:03,119 Speaker 1: be careful to be done.