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Speaker 1: another jubilap twenties. Tell me I'm moving ninety two point five. Hello, Hi,

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Speaker 1: I'm calling from elementary school. I'm looking to speak with Nick. Hi. Yes,

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Speaker 1: this is him. Hi Nick, My name is Darbn Schlong.

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Speaker 1: I'm an administrator at your son's school. How you doing today? Hi?

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Speaker 1: I'm good? How are you not too bad? Listen? I'm

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Speaker 1: calling all the parents to see if they received the

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Speaker 1: flyer that we sent home last week regarding Halloween. Um,

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Speaker 1: you know, I actually don't think I saw anything. Oh well, good,

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Speaker 1: I'm glad I caught you so. As you know, in

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Speaker 1: previous years here, we let the kids dress up as

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Speaker 1: whatever they want on October thirty first, and we call

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Speaker 1: it Autumnal dress Up Day because we don't we don't

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Speaker 1: like to use the H word, right right. Some people

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Speaker 1: are offended by that. Yeah, anything to avoid halloway, yeah,

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Speaker 1: m But some kids still dressed up as witches or ghosts,

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Speaker 1: and that did offend some people Okay, this year, all

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Speaker 1: the costumes need to be preapproved by me before they

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Speaker 1: can be seen on the school grounds. That way, we

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Speaker 1: don't have any costumes that could be offensive. All right,

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Speaker 1: Can I actually just be a little honest that it

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Speaker 1: just seems like you're going a little too far in

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Speaker 1: the attempt of not being offensive to anyone. And it's

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Speaker 1: it's Halloween, you know. No, no, we can't say that

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Speaker 1: word is not Halloween. It's Autumnal dress up Day today

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Speaker 1: that we dress up in autumn for fun. Okay, So,

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Speaker 1: regardless of your feelings, we have to do it the

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Speaker 1: way we have to do it. So what is your

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Speaker 1: son going to be dressing up as for Autumnal dress

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Speaker 1: up Day? Well, for Halloween, my son will be dressing

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Speaker 1: up as a pirate. Ooh, that is not a good choice.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. That's a great choice. What he wants to

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Speaker 1: be the pirates? Well, that could be offensive to a

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Speaker 1: lot of people. We can't have that here at our school.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Pirates, Oh many people, some of our children

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Speaker 1: may have pirate ancestors, and we need to be sensitive

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Speaker 1: pirate ancestors. Why is that like even a thing? Wow? Now,

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Speaker 1: I maybe I understand why your son is a little

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Speaker 1: insensitive to our pirate friends. Listen, wearing an eyepatch or

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Speaker 1: speaking with exaggerated rs could really have a negative impact

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Speaker 1: on the other kids. So no pirates for autumnal dress

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Speaker 1: of Day? Are you joking? This is unbelievable. Well, maybe

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Speaker 1: you could send him as a Pittsburgh Pirate from the

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Speaker 1: Major League Baseball team. You're a school. You should be

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Speaker 1: encouraging creativity and encouraging well open minded spaces for creativity.

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Speaker 1: Creativity as long as it doesn't offend. So go wild,

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Speaker 1: go crazy, be whatever you want to be, and just

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Speaker 1: make sure that nobody can be offended by it. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: So you're you're telling me that my son can't even

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Speaker 1: be a pirate. I mean, like, this is ridiculous. He

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Speaker 1: can be whatever he wants to be. No, he can't

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Speaker 1: be he wants to be a pirate. You're not letting

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Speaker 1: him be that. No, the only other costume we have

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Speaker 1: is Superman. Oh, oh boy, I can tell you a

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Speaker 1: lot that's wrong with that one. No, that's not approved either.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, how is that one not approved? That is

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Speaker 1: the one Halloween costume that everyone has been Well, let's

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Speaker 1: focus on the name. I mean, first of all, Superman. No,

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Speaker 1: shouldn't it be Superperson? Probably superperson? Okay, it's Superman. That's

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Speaker 1: the character name. Why is that offensive? Well, and that

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Speaker 1: is a very offensive name. Okay, we shouldn't be putting

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Speaker 1: gender labels on our superheroes. But that's the character's name.

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Speaker 1: It is his name. But we don't know who he

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Speaker 1: identifies as, do we? He identifies a man Superman, Well,

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Speaker 1: that's the title they gave him. That's not the title

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Speaker 1: he gave himself. Nobody ever asked him. I look back

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Speaker 1: at all those comics. Nobody once asked him who he

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Speaker 1: identifies with. They just have to label on him, and

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Speaker 1: all of a sudden, he's Superman. He might not have

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Speaker 1: even identified as a man or a woman. He might

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Speaker 1: have identified as a goat. He might have wanted to

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Speaker 1: be super goat and he should have been able to be. Oh,

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Speaker 1: I see, so super goat. So my son could go

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Speaker 1: as Superat and that would be fine with you. Well, man, no,

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Speaker 1: he wouldn't be able to go as Supergoat. Unfortunately, there

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Speaker 1: are a lot of goats who don't have superpowers, and

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Speaker 1: they could probably be a little offended at that. Let

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Speaker 1: me ask you a question, sir, let me ask you

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Speaker 1: a question. What effect can he go ask? Oh? That

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Speaker 1: is a good question, and I was hoping you were asking.

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Speaker 1: I've got a great idea for all of the students

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Speaker 1: this year. How about you have him dress up as

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Speaker 1: a scary student. But it's a scary student. I'm glad

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Speaker 1: you asked. It's just his normal school attire and he

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Speaker 1: does his work and then goes home. But we get

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Speaker 1: to college. Well you if you say it's scary, it

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Speaker 1: could be. So I want all the students this year

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Speaker 1: just to go as students. That way, nobody's feelings get hurt.

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Speaker 1: You know what, You're a total in the soul. You're

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Speaker 1: exactly right, because this is actually Jewil from Brook and

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Speaker 1: Jewil in the Morning doing a phone tap on you.

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Speaker 1: Your brother Robert set you up. What are you talking about?

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Speaker 1: Is this a school? No, this isn't the school. It's

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Speaker 1: a joke. Your brother said that you were complaining about

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Speaker 1: your son's school being two PC, so he wanted me

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Speaker 1: to mess with you. Oh my god, are you kidding me? No?

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Speaker 1: I think it's okay if your kid goes to school

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Speaker 1: as a pirate. Good I mean, personally I'm offended, but

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Speaker 1: you can let him go as a pirate if you

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Speaker 1: want to. I mean, it's ridiculous, right, I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: absolutely ridiculous. What kind of schools will do this. It

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Speaker 1: is ridiculous that kids will dress up as pirates at school.

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Speaker 1: That is totally uncalled for Morning five