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Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so it's just us today, Cat and I'm supporting.

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Speaker 2: I'm not wearing a it looks like in the camera

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Speaker 2: I'm wearing a What are those things called when you

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Speaker 2: put them on your leg when you get married?

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Speaker 3: Oh I never got her? Yeah, I don't know if

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Speaker 3: I did. I can't even remember. Did you? Maybe I did.

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Speaker 2: I'm sure I feel like you would back because I

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Speaker 2: feel like they're more popular.

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Speaker 1: Yeah no, no, I did, because I hate that thing,

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Speaker 1: you know, Like we're in the reception really like, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, why are we doing this in front of people?

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Speaker 3: It's so uncomfortable? Yep, yep, I had it, So are

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Speaker 3: you having one?

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Speaker 2: No? But it looks like I'm wearing my over my

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Speaker 2: third degree burn. I went by the way, Listen. Who

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Speaker 2: knew her irons were that dangerous?

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Speaker 3: It was scary looking there for a minute.

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Speaker 2: I know it was bad, but it's gotten so much better.

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Speaker 2: It's getting better. It finally doesn't hurt after almost two weeks.

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Speaker 3: Oh God, that's good.

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Speaker 2: I mean it hurts a little, but I'm like, well,

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Speaker 2: it's kind of like hurt still, But I know who knew.

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Speaker 1: I mean, and me got a good second degree burned

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Speaker 1: from one, so I can only imagine.

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Speaker 2: But now that I'm like supporting, like it just looks

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Speaker 2: like I'm wearing it does well. But I'm sick of

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Speaker 2: wearing those you know, those bandage or what are those

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Speaker 2: things called the it's like the tape things that go

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Speaker 2: around and they stick, but you know when you'd get

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Speaker 2: your ivy draw.

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Speaker 3: Or something like, yeah, like the gauze stuff or what it's.

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Speaker 2: Not gauze sticks. Yeah, And so I'm trying to think

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Speaker 2: of the name, but it's not coming to me. But

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Speaker 2: it kept like annoying my skin. So I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 2: I I like to mcgiver things. I'm like, what do

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Speaker 2: I like, how do I get a thing that can

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Speaker 2: wrap around aid? Because the band aids are don't fit

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Speaker 2: like this area. So I took one of my old

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Speaker 2: leggings that I don't like, and I cut the legs

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Speaker 2: pretty small. The legging. I mean, I was seriously standing

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Speaker 2: in my room, going I can figure this out, and

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Speaker 2: I'm just like, okay, I have back together. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: all right, how can I do this? And then yeah,

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Speaker 2: I just was like, oh, I've got these pair of

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Speaker 2: leggings and if I just cut the thigh parts out

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Speaker 2: of the legging, yeah, roll it up to my thigh.

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Speaker 3: So smart. Anyways, now that you've got it covered.

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Speaker 2: People are like, I don't care about your burn or

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Speaker 2: this is literally on your leg. I wish it has

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Speaker 2: been a saga.

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Speaker 1: I wish people understood the excitement of our world in

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Speaker 1: the sense that it's like the text are like, how's

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Speaker 1: Emmy because she's been sick, how's your leg good?

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Speaker 3: How's Roman? Like, that's literally our text back and forth.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's just life.

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Speaker 2: You know what's interesting is Sarah Bryce just said the

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Speaker 2: exact same thing because we were talking about I did

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Speaker 2: a one of those poop things. Oh yeah, And I'm like.

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Speaker 1: Can you be a little bit more specific about what

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Speaker 1: you mean by poop things?

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Speaker 3: Sure.

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Speaker 2: So I've been working with this guy over at Invigorate

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Speaker 2: Health in Franklin, and he's you guys have to me.

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Speaker 2: We we love Nate. He's been helping regulate the hormones.

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Speaker 2: And I was talking about gut stuff because now that

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Speaker 2: I've looked more into it, they're saying, how anxiety is

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Speaker 2: lots seventy seventy percent stemmed from gut and so I

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Speaker 2: was like, well, you know, how do you figure out

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Speaker 2: and he goes, the best way to do it is

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Speaker 2: take taking a poop sample, and I'm like, explain, So basically,

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Speaker 2: you poop into this thing, like this plastic or paper thing,

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Speaker 2: and then you scoop your poop out. Oh, and then

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Speaker 2: you put it into these tubes and then they send

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Speaker 2: it in to then see what's going on with your gut,

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Speaker 2: because then you can one thousand percent pinpoint Okay, this

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Speaker 2: is what is going on with your this is the

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Speaker 2: probatic you need, this is what's happening, like like just

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Speaker 2: completely target exactly what you need. And so I'm like, well,

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Speaker 2: I'd rather do that than just shoot in the dark

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Speaker 2: with things. So it was I was and I knew

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Speaker 2: Sarah Brice did it too, so I'm calling her. I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 2: so wait, like how do you scoop it out? Like

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Speaker 2: is there like a spoon or like to like and

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Speaker 2: she was like, I miss our conversations from Hot Girl

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Speaker 2: Summer because now we're talking about scooping poop into jars

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Speaker 2: instead of you.

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Speaker 3: Know, men, men, they have changed a lot.

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, I know, I wouldn't trade it for

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Speaker 2: the world though it. But yeah, I mean, now we're

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Speaker 2: talking about just yeah, like sickness and poop and burns.

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Speaker 2: But whatever, it's not as exciting as people.

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Speaker 3: That's really not that's so funny.

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Speaker 2: But so I scooped it out and then he called

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Speaker 2: me and I had my meeting and it actually kind

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Speaker 2: of freaked me out. Wait why I so, I'm sure

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Speaker 2: it's fine, okay, but how did we even get on

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Speaker 2: that topic?

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Speaker 3: I'm talking about?

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Speaker 1: How boring?

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Speaker 2: Are sorry? I'm like, how did we get to my poop?

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Speaker 3: How did this? This is literally real life. I'm finding

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Speaker 3: out right now what's wrong with your poop?

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Speaker 2: Oh? I know, but it's so fascinating. Well, so basically,

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Speaker 2: you know, he hands you the diagram or like the

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Speaker 2: whole thing, you know, And I had texted him, didn't

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Speaker 2: I tell you? I texted him because I was talking

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Speaker 2: about my bird and you tell me? And then I

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Speaker 2: was like, hey, is my poop come in yet? Oh yeah?

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Speaker 3: And never followed up like he's like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I haven't looked yet, but I will will in

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Speaker 2: the second. He's like, yeah, I haven't looked yet, but

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Speaker 2: I will in a second. And he goes, oh yeah, yep,

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Speaker 2: not good I was like, you can't tell me not good.

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Speaker 3: It's like he hasn't learned yet how to deal with you.

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Speaker 2: Like I go not good as I'm dying that good

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Speaker 2: or not good as in like fixable not good. He's like,

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Speaker 2: when can you meet? I was like, okay, so I'll

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Speaker 2: see you in an hour. Yeah, I'm like we were

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Speaker 2: in Wilmington, bless. I love going to Wilmington, by the way,

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Speaker 2: It's so fun. So go to his office and he

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Speaker 2: hands me the thing, so basically and I'm sure I'm fine,

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Speaker 2: but there's also a percentage that something could be not

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Speaker 2: great in there, so I have a well, first of all,

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Speaker 2: the inflammation is like off the charts, like you're supposed

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Speaker 2: to be under I think it was. I have to

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Speaker 2: look again, but I think it's supposed to be under

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Speaker 2: fifty inflammation. I'm four hundred. Oh wow, So like my

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Speaker 2: inflammation's off the charts. But what kind of scared me

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Speaker 2: was then I want to get too into it because

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Speaker 2: I'm not like trying to. I'm again, I'm sure I'm fine,

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Speaker 2: but having said that, this is like TM, I I'm

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Speaker 2: so sorry, but but this is also I kind of

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Speaker 2: want to Now I guess talk about it because it's

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Speaker 2: something he said. It didn't even make me think about it,

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Speaker 2: but now that we're almost forty, this is something that,

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Speaker 2: you know, whatever. So he's like okay. He's like, so

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Speaker 2: this one worries me a little bit, and I need

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Speaker 2: you to go get a colonoscopy. And I was like why.

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Speaker 2: He's like well, he's like not only he was your

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Speaker 2: blood amount in your stool is like topping charts. He's like,

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Speaker 2: have you noticed blood in your stool? And I was

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Speaker 2: like yeah, but I just thought it was like normal.

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Speaker 2: I was like any you know and post baby I've

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Speaker 2: I just thought it was like, sorry, we've talked about

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Speaker 2: this before, but like hemorrhid maybe I was like maybe

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Speaker 2: I still had one up there and it was like

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Speaker 2: or I don't know, and he was just like this

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Speaker 2: should not be anywhere near this number. He's like, I

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Speaker 2: need you to get a quoenoscopy and I'm like, am

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Speaker 2: I okay? And he goes, well this marker he's like

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Speaker 2: you could maybe have rectal cancer and I was so

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Speaker 2: I just like immediately stair crying in the office and

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Speaker 2: I was like Nate, and he's like, I'm sure you're fine.

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Speaker 2: He's like, if it's if it happened post pregnancy. He's like,

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Speaker 2: most likely there's maybe a hemorrhid you don't know about,

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Speaker 2: or something that's like tearing every time you go to

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Speaker 2: the bathroom or whatever.

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Speaker 1: That's good information to know because I mean we are

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Speaker 1: at forty And that literally made me think, oh, I've

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Speaker 1: never talked to Nate about taking a sample, but like

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Speaker 1: I should, you know, And then I mean I should

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Speaker 1: get the same test just to see, you know. I

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Speaker 1: mean we're getting older, those things that we forget, like

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Speaker 1: it's time. It's time to start doing these tests.

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Speaker 2: When we have to take care of like our body

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Speaker 2: is the des soul that is keeping us. Yeah, like

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Speaker 2: I want to be we both want to be our

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Speaker 2: healthiest versions for the kids. And it's like all right,

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Speaker 2: I started with the hormone now, then I went to

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Speaker 2: the food sensitivities. I'm like, all right, all right, gut,

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Speaker 2: that's the that's powering everything. So with the brain and

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Speaker 2: you know, just I'm I just want to be like

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Speaker 2: here as long as I can.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I went.

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Speaker 1: I actually saw him before you did and kind of

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Speaker 1: got my second blood work back and a lot of

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Speaker 1: my numbers that were off are getting much better.

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Speaker 2: Oh ya.

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Speaker 1: And so it's just like that's the first time I've

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Speaker 1: ever actually okay, this went down. It should keep trending down,

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Speaker 1: you know, and like this one's perfect now and this

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Speaker 1: one's like it's just you feel better? Yeah, I mean

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Speaker 1: I feel great. I mean I haven't done all the

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Speaker 1: things that you've done. I didn't do the obviously, haven't

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Speaker 1: done the gut thing. I didn't do the food sensitivities

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Speaker 1: because I don't feel like I really nothing no food

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Speaker 1: specific foods make me feel different, you know whatever, So

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Speaker 1: I haven't done that.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, I feel great. We just have certain vitamins

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Speaker 3: and stuff I'm on.

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Speaker 2: So the the interesting piece about the food sensitivity test

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Speaker 2: is I go, how will I know if when I

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Speaker 2: go back, because after so many months you can test

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Speaker 2: out the food again and see he's like, oh, you'll know,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, oh, really, well, I and I don't

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Speaker 2: know if it was in my brain, but I had

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Speaker 2: something that I didn't know had something in it. But

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Speaker 2: I was like, oh, my stomach like hurts and I

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Speaker 2: feel like really tired. And then I was like, wait

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Speaker 2: a minute, I went back and it had that that

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Speaker 2: fruit extract. I was like, holy, I bet, I was like,

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Speaker 2: but so there might be like maybe if someone's tired

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Speaker 2: or whatever, or you're feeling like it could be the

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Speaker 2: food you're eating that's causing it.

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Speaker 1: It's just yeah, absolutely, it's it's very fascinating. I think

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Speaker 1: it's all very fascinating.

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Speaker 2: Having said that, I don't think I have the sea word,

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Speaker 2: you know what I mean. I think it was just

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Speaker 2: I'm sure it's something from pregnancy, right, But now I'm like, well,

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Speaker 2: now I want to know. Oh yeah, sounds like you

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Speaker 2: need to immediately called.

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Speaker 3: How old are we supposed to get klonosopes anyway?

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Speaker 2: I think it's fifty because I remember, like I like people, Hey, Siri,

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Speaker 2: but I supposed to get a kolonoscopy? Hold, oh, forty five?

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Speaker 1: Say I think it got younger because they're diagnosing younger crazy.

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Speaker 1: So you know we're not far from meeting them anyway.

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Speaker 2: Well, let you know how it goes.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, let me know.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't want to make sure my thought,

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Speaker 2: but I know I don't know. At least I think

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Speaker 2: you go to sleep. I was talking to surely girlfriend

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Speaker 2: about it, who had undone. Surely I mean.

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Speaker 1: Hopefully right, Okay, let me know before I call Nate,

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Speaker 1: because I'm not doing this.

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Speaker 3: If you're not asleep, he's not doing it.

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Speaker 1: But I know, but I'm saying, before I called Nate,

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Speaker 1: schedule mine.

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Speaker 3: But lord, how did we get here?

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Speaker 2: Oh my goodness? Is there anything you want to discuss?

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Speaker 1: Let's see, we were talking about this the other day

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Speaker 1: and I need your take on it. Okay, I'm scared

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Speaker 1: j Lo and Ben? Oh lord, what is going on?

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Speaker 1: Did you see where like he was out without his

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Speaker 1: wedding ring and then now she was just on a

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Speaker 1: carpet with her wedding ring and then they were together,

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Speaker 1: but like sources are saying they're not together.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it's just I don't know. I don't know

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Speaker 3: what I think. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: But it just had me thinking about, like how much

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Speaker 1: we literally scrutinize every second of someone's relationship, Like he

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Speaker 1: could have just forgotten to wear his ring, Like you

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Speaker 1: remember that time I forgot well a couple of times

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Speaker 1: I took my rings off to work out.

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Speaker 2: Can we just talk about that moment, the fact that

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Speaker 2: you forgot to wear your wedding ring. You were going to, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you were going to the hope Grows event. We yeah,

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Speaker 2: this is going to just go on the same ride

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Speaker 2: that we just went on with my poop. So Catherine,

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Speaker 2: I'm I'm filming in West Virginia. Catherine is on her

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Speaker 2: way to the Hope Grows event where Windown was being

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Speaker 2: honored for talking about mental health and we're getting the

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Speaker 2: Hope Grows Award for bringing awareness. And You're like, but

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Speaker 2: first some stopping at Target. Okay, like why are you

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Speaker 2: going to Target? But I need to take you back

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Speaker 2: for a minute. Okakay, You're gone, okay, right, So I'm

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Speaker 2: so sorry.

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Speaker 1: Right, so I'm already anxious because you're anxious when I'm gone, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: especially for this kind of thing, like.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, because the speaking, like we got to speak and.

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Speaker 1: It's just me to Kristin and I'm just like so

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Speaker 1: all day I'm like texting Kristen and I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: but like I'm literally only saying this much, like I

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Speaker 1: need you to carry this, and she's off on like

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Speaker 1: I don't know what she's She's like not even paying attention,

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Speaker 1: you know, And so I'm like frantically getting ready. I

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Speaker 1: can't remember what I was doing with the kids, but

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Speaker 1: I had worked out, probably not even that morning, probably

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Speaker 1: the day before, because I've been doing this badly, not

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Speaker 1: just my ring, all my rings. And I get in

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Speaker 1: the car and I'm like, oh my god, I don't

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Speaker 1: have my rings on. I was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: Amy's going to.

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Speaker 2: Be there's our therapist.

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Speaker 1: Yes, but I currently do not see Amy. I actually

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Speaker 1: had only technically seen Amy to help come to a

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Speaker 1: decision on my marriage. Right, Okay, that's very important to note.

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Speaker 3: So I'm like, oh my god.

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Speaker 2: I'm living because of what the circumstances coming in.

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Speaker 1: Yes, no, you can laugh all you want, and mind you.

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Speaker 1: Nick was supposed to come and now cannot come. Why

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Speaker 1: couldn't he come in because he was stuck with an

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Speaker 1: out of town client whose flight got backed up. Delaight, okay,

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Speaker 1: this is their only time to look at houses. I'm like, babe,

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Speaker 1: you know I hate this stuff. Anyway, literally didn't affect

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Speaker 1: me in the least, but I knew when I walked

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Speaker 1: in Nick was not going to be there, and I

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Speaker 1: had no wedding ring on, and I was like, I

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Speaker 1: cannot see Amy like this.

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Speaker 2: So she's like, I'm at Target getting a wedding ring,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, what are you doing. She's like, I

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Speaker 2: have to I can't have amy see me thought, I'm.

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Speaker 3: Like, who cares? Oh I forgot your ring?

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Speaker 2: Like big deal?

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Speaker 3: Yeah I did.

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Speaker 1: I was running late and I ran to Target and

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Speaker 1: bought all the rings I could find.

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Speaker 2: So this is interesting. So this leads me to this

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Speaker 2: interesting topic because the pro like you wanted the perception

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Speaker 2: like be like, why did you Why did you care

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Speaker 2: that you didn't have your ring on? Did you want?

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Speaker 1: To be completely honest, it has never There's been a

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Speaker 1: few times two that I've been around you, specifically where

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Speaker 1: I did not have my ring on and you assumed

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Speaker 1: something was wrong.

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Speaker 2: Well that was like during the early days.

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Speaker 1: No, when like one day we did the podcast. Do

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Speaker 1: you think I was working out in the early days? No,

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Speaker 1: I just started working out. Literally we did a podcast

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Speaker 1: one day, I think I knew and then another.

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Speaker 2: No, what you know? You guys had your.

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Speaker 3: Since we've been together back together? Oh, back together, Yes,

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Speaker 3: I'm saying in the last month. I just started this

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Speaker 3: thing in January.

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Speaker 2: I'm so confused.

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Speaker 1: I have never not worn my ring ever, right until

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Speaker 1: I actually started lifting weights.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, So like I thought like maybe like you right.

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Speaker 1: Was good, But I'm saying, okay, God, the way you

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Speaker 1: react did both times, and one of the even that

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Speaker 1: that was the second time.

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Speaker 3: You're like, but what's really going on?

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, I can't have this conversation because Janna

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Speaker 1: is like my therapist, and then Amy is going to

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Speaker 1: be like, what's going on? Like, I'm not having this

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Speaker 1: conversation because it literally means nothing. I just forgot my rings,

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Speaker 1: you know. So anyway, all that to say, none of

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Speaker 1: the rings fit. I'm like trying to hold a ring

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Speaker 1: on my finger. She did ask about him not being there,

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Speaker 1: and she did seem very disappointed. So thankfully I had

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Speaker 1: some ring on my fingers, so she didn't ask me

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Speaker 1: about that. All that to say, people judge, not that

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Speaker 1: you were judging, but people judge caring exactly, Oh, Perc,

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Speaker 1: Like are you sure everything's okay?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: But like to me, that's also the difference.

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Speaker 1: And this is where it kind of goes to j

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Speaker 1: Lo and Bin if something's truly going on and we're

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Speaker 1: really I'm not taking my ring off for people to

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Speaker 1: ask me that.

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Speaker 2: So this is an interesting thing because it leads me

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Speaker 2: back to when I played that game. So I did

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Speaker 2: back in what year was this what it was back

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Speaker 2: in when we did Momuary wind Down? Yes, and I

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Speaker 2: had just found out that he had cheated again, and

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Speaker 2: I took my ring off, and I wanted people to

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Speaker 2: notice that my ring was off. Yep. I didn't want

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Speaker 2: to say that we weren't together, or that we were

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Speaker 2: on a break or that, but I did want people

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Speaker 2: to notice, yeah, that's so messed up to even admit that. Well,

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's truth, but I wanted to. I don't

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Speaker 2: know why. I just it's not that I wanted the attention.

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Speaker 2: I just I almost wanted him to know, like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: he messed up again and I'm not okay, and I

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Speaker 2: don't know what I'm doing.

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Speaker 1: That's like my innertilob Well, I think it was kind

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Speaker 1: of your way of telling other people, like, y'all think

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Speaker 1: he's good, but he's not where we're right and I

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Speaker 1: knew that, and so again I'm the opposite.

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Speaker 3: No way is right or wrong.

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Speaker 1: I would never do that because I don't want to

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Speaker 1: talk about those things. When things are not good, I

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Speaker 1: do not want to so we could be again. I

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Speaker 1: didn't take my ring off when we were getting divorced, right,

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Speaker 1: It took Nick taking his off before I even I

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Speaker 1: just don't you know, for that conversation.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so all that to say, that's why, but I

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Speaker 3: did get a ring.

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Speaker 2: But it's interesting now though, because I wouldn't do that

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Speaker 2: now because of that's the speculation gives me so much

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Speaker 2: peaky anxiety. Oh yeah that I'm like, it will stay

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Speaker 2: on until we are officially yeh.

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Speaker 3: But like something happens if you ax. That's the thing.

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Speaker 1: If you excellently don't wear yours one day, you're in

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Speaker 1: a place like j Lo and Ben where people are

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Speaker 1: going to assume something is wrong. So he could have

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Speaker 1: just not had his on. Maybe they're not together. Maybe

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Speaker 1: they are, but I mean we're making assumptions.

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Speaker 2: I really don't want to say anything. I think it

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Speaker 2: sucks to have the all the eyeballs, you know, because

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Speaker 2: you just don't really know what's going on. Right. It's

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Speaker 2: the kind of the same thing with Kate Middleton. Everyone

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Speaker 2: thought they were having issues and then she had freaking cancer.

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Speaker 2: No that was so you know, and that was that

385
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Speaker 2: was I think a wake up call for a lot

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Speaker 2: of people that did talk about them, because there was

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Speaker 2: a lot of people, podcasters and news people that came

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Speaker 2: back and apologized for saying something because you know, they

389
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,520
Speaker 2: something was really that's it's awful and it's so bad.

390
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Speaker 2: So yeah, I mean, I'm sure there's what marriages doesn't

391
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Speaker 2: have issues, right, you know, so I'm sure there where

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Speaker 2: there's smokeler's fire. And having said that, it's you know,

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Speaker 2: it just it sucks because people like that that are

394
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Speaker 2: in the spotlight can't can't do things privately, can't go

395
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Speaker 2: through a marriage that has hard times privately, right, you

396
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Speaker 2: can't have a relationship privately. Now that's the life they chose.

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Speaker 2: You can say that in all the things, but you know,

398
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Speaker 2: it's just there's so many eyes and that's got to

399
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:52,600
Speaker 2: be really hard to have people. I mean, I only

400
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Speaker 2: have it on the smallest degree, Like I can't even

401
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:59,719
Speaker 2: imagine having it like that, so many eyeballs, so much

402
00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:03,040
Speaker 2: prier sure so much. And for her, like I feel

403
00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:06,560
Speaker 2: for because she just like she loves to love and

404
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:09,359
Speaker 2: I feel like I and she's just you know, I

405
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:12,280
Speaker 2: want everyone to be happy. Yeah, you know, I truly do.

406
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:15,320
Speaker 2: I want everyone to be happy, and I just you know,

407
00:19:15,359 --> 00:19:17,359
Speaker 2: obviously she's had a couple of marriages and I hate

408
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:21,240
Speaker 2: like that that piece for me is the hardest piece,

409
00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:24,200
Speaker 2: like even marrying Alan, is the comments of the people

410
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,840
Speaker 2: that are going to come in and go, oh, you know,

411
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:29,200
Speaker 2: hope this fourth time, I'm like, you have no idea,

412
00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:33,679
Speaker 2: like the journey and like what that that first marriage

413
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:34,960
Speaker 2: is and not that he tried to kill me, you

414
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,879
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like so and then there's me

415
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:39,679
Speaker 2: like trying to defend it again, but like okay, so

416
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:42,280
Speaker 2: what so what She's been married four times? So what

417
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Speaker 2: I'm getting married these may times?

418
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Speaker 3: Like okay, yeah, you.

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Speaker 2: Know, like I'm not going to fault someone for loving

420
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Speaker 2: and trying. Yeah, you know, no for sure. And I

421
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:54,720
Speaker 2: don't think she should, Like I don't feel like anyone

422
00:19:54,760 --> 00:20:02,320
Speaker 2: should have the hate and the nuggetivity around loving and trying.

423
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:06,600
Speaker 2: Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, and I hope. I

424
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:10,040
Speaker 2: just can't imagine the uh that kind of circus of

425
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:13,320
Speaker 2: publicly living like that trying to figure out because it's hard.

426
00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:15,880
Speaker 2: It's hard enough like being in a marriage closed closed doors.

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00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:18,800
Speaker 1: Well, and I think it also kind of shows both

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00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 1: sides of it, like you're you understand that side of it,

429
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Speaker 1: but like I think you can also under the stand

430
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Speaker 1: the side of like they are in the public eye

431
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Speaker 1: and we do talk about these things, like me and

432
00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,600
Speaker 1: you were talking about them, like, oh, what is going on?

433
00:20:32,880 --> 00:20:34,919
Speaker 1: I think there's a fine line, like people want to

434
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 1: know what's going on in people's lives. We're even guilty

435
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,320
Speaker 1: of it. We're even like what is going on with Jen?

436
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:40,919
Speaker 1: And you know?

437
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,600
Speaker 2: Like so I think they say that about our friend,

438
00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:46,000
Speaker 2: Like I'm like, oh, what's going on? How are you know?

439
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:47,800
Speaker 3: I'm just saying that.

440
00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:50,639
Speaker 1: I Yes, I think I'm also kind of defending the

441
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 1: other side in a sense that.

442
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:53,960
Speaker 2: The people ask.

443
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, like the people that are asking. I don't defend

444
00:20:56,600 --> 00:21:01,919
Speaker 1: hate ever, but I do under stand people wanting to

445
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:05,360
Speaker 1: know and the intrigue behind it. We've built this world

446
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:07,280
Speaker 1: where it's like, even I want to know what's new

447
00:21:07,320 --> 00:21:10,520
Speaker 1: with you know, Jen and Ben? Now you know, so,

448
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:14,240
Speaker 1: I just I understand that, but I think that like

449
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:18,440
Speaker 1: until you're on the other side, like you have been,

450
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:23,160
Speaker 1: of the hate behind it, then it's hard to understand

451
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:24,520
Speaker 1: how that affects people.

452
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:34,640
Speaker 4: Ol.

453
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:38,240
Speaker 3: It's Rosselin Sanchez and Eric Winter. You he said Aja

454
00:21:38,320 --> 00:21:41,639
Speaker 3: the Hoop podcast host. Check out our episode with Ricky

455
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:42,760
Speaker 3: Martin out now.

456
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:45,239
Speaker 4: Oh my god, guys. He's a fellow Puerto rican A

457
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:51,760
Speaker 4: good friend. We talk parenthood, we talk TV, film, mental health, travel.

458
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:54,720
Speaker 4: It is a conversation you can only have between friends,

459
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:56,200
Speaker 4: So make sure you check it out.

460
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:59,280
Speaker 2: Now listen to he said Aado on America's number one

461
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:01,080
Speaker 2: podcast Now Work, iHeart.

462
00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:02,960
Speaker 4: Open Your Free, iHeart app and Search.

463
00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:08,200
Speaker 2: He said, So, I don't even know if it's so

464
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:10,879
Speaker 2: much the hate, but I think it's the failure so

465
00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:13,800
Speaker 2: like and this this is actually gonna get me like emotional.

466
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 2: But it's like you, I don't think people like do

467
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 2: you think I wanted to be married that many times?

468
00:22:19,119 --> 00:22:19,960
Speaker 2: Like truly like.

469
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:23,120
Speaker 3: You just want to find love.

470
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 2: It's embarrassing, right right, Yeah.

471
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:29,800
Speaker 1: No, I mean that's I mean, that's such a that's

472
00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:32,000
Speaker 1: always been a really hard thing for you. And I

473
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:37,320
Speaker 1: don't think people understand fully understand that, you know. And

474
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:40,360
Speaker 1: it's I'm sure the same for her, and you know, like.

475
00:22:40,320 --> 00:22:42,720
Speaker 2: That's why I feel bad for her almost Yeah, like

476
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,199
Speaker 2: like I like want this for her as much as

477
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:47,359
Speaker 2: I want it for me. There's the right for that

478
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 2: where it's like, oh, I just like I want her

479
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,240
Speaker 2: to be so happy. They want everyone to happy. I

480
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:52,080
Speaker 2: want happy, you.

481
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 1: Know, And you all are the kind of the people

482
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:55,280
Speaker 1: like that I mean, I don't know her. I'm just

483
00:22:55,320 --> 00:22:57,359
Speaker 1: making an assumption, but I know you're the kind of

484
00:22:57,359 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 1: person you wanted to get married once and be happy

485
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:01,840
Speaker 1: for the rest of your life. Like my god, yeah,

486
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:04,440
Speaker 1: that's like the most important thing to you. Like that's

487
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:07,720
Speaker 1: what you But it's almost like you're you're embarrassed and

488
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:11,440
Speaker 1: you're being faulted for trying to find true love and

489
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,879
Speaker 1: that's not fair. But I understand the embarrassment behind it,

490
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 1: and I hate that.

491
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:19,000
Speaker 2: Well, it's just because everyone just reads like headlines and

492
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,560
Speaker 2: so I just feel like, I mean, Alan is the

493
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:24,919
Speaker 2: first person who I didn't feel like I had to

494
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:27,959
Speaker 2: defend my past like normally, Like I went on this

495
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 2: one date with this guy and he was like, so

496
00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:35,359
Speaker 2: you've been married a lot, And that's always kind of

497
00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,920
Speaker 2: been the conversation where I'm like, yeah, when I was nineteen,

498
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 2: I met someone and I knew him for you know,

499
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,280
Speaker 2: a few days went to Vegas. It was an idiot.

500
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:45,720
Speaker 2: He tried to kill me. They and all that in court. Yeah,

501
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:47,280
Speaker 2: I walked on the aisle to someone else and I

502
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:50,879
Speaker 2: realized within a week that I made a stupid decision.

503
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 2: I was trying to be chosen. I was very young

504
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 2: and I was still like, had a lot to do,

505
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:58,000
Speaker 2: but I knew it wasn't gonna work. And so those

506
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:02,600
Speaker 2: two are like war marriages to me. Right, to me,

507
00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:06,120
Speaker 2: I always say, I've been married once, which was with Mike,

508
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:09,720
Speaker 2: And do do people honestly think that I wanted to

509
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:12,640
Speaker 2: not be in that marriage? Like I did not want

510
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:15,240
Speaker 2: my husband to cheat on me countless times? Right, I

511
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:18,560
Speaker 2: would have loved to have been married to him, you know.

512
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:24,120
Speaker 2: Having said that, you know, I'm now grateful for, yeah,

513
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,120
Speaker 2: the love that I do have now because it wasn't right.

514
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:29,919
Speaker 2: But I did not want to get divorced. Yeah, Like

515
00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:32,200
Speaker 2: I would not have stayed for that many years affair

516
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: after affair, Right, I don't want that, but I do

517
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:42,119
Speaker 2: want love, you know. And and so that's that's the

518
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,520
Speaker 2: piece too, Like even just with the upcoming wedding, it's

519
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:48,879
Speaker 2: there's embarrassment with it, and you know, people don't know

520
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,720
Speaker 2: the whole story. They just see a headline and they

521
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:52,800
Speaker 2: just go and they think with Jen too, like oh,

522
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:55,520
Speaker 2: she's so you know X, Y and Z because she's

523
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 2: been married so many times. Well, no, she's just she's

524
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:01,919
Speaker 2: growing and learning and we make mistakes and yeah, so

525
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,840
Speaker 2: that's why I like, I'm just like, that's why I'm

526
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:07,119
Speaker 2: an interested invested in it in a way because I

527
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,560
Speaker 2: I have like this, I just want her to be happy.

528
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're rooting for him, Yeah.

529
00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 2: I want I'm rooting for like, you know, the the

530
00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:18,639
Speaker 2: love because it has been it's been a journey for her.

531
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:20,520
Speaker 2: And whereas again where I just like, I'm not saying

532
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:24,600
Speaker 2: I'm like j Lo, but marriage where I am. So

533
00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:28,000
Speaker 2: I want that like love for her and the happily

534
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,679
Speaker 2: ever after because I feel in my soul that I

535
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,119
Speaker 2: have my happily ever after and I'm so grateful now

536
00:25:34,359 --> 00:25:39,080
Speaker 2: for those past relationships that have led me to Alan.

537
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, sorry, you're fine.

538
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:45,080
Speaker 2: Well, because it's clearly like a that's my one piece

539
00:25:45,119 --> 00:25:48,120
Speaker 2: that like, yeah, you can throw, you can say all

540
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,280
Speaker 2: the million things to me, but that's always the one

541
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:53,680
Speaker 2: that like hurts because it's I have shame around it, yeah,

542
00:25:54,119 --> 00:25:56,720
Speaker 2: and I don't because it led me here. So it's

543
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,680
Speaker 2: like it's it's like a twofold.

544
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:01,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, but also like we're I'm not supposed to feel

545
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:04,840
Speaker 1: shame for our past. We're not like it led you

546
00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,000
Speaker 1: to a certain place, Like that's not what God wants

547
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 1: for you. He wants you to be to learn from that,

548
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:13,120
Speaker 1: but he also is trying to show you like, yeah,

549
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:14,840
Speaker 1: it was a windy road and all that, but like

550
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:16,480
Speaker 1: if it wasn't for that.

551
00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:19,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, and now I'm so grateful because I'm like, I

552
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:21,320
Speaker 2: don't I can't imagine a world without Roman. I can't

553
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:25,200
Speaker 2: imagine a world without Alan. Like I'm I'm I love

554
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:28,439
Speaker 2: like I daily. I'm like, thank you, Mike, and you know,

555
00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 2: to myself because I'm like, I know, I don't do

556
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:31,960
Speaker 2: that anymore, but I did, you know, because I'm like,

557
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:34,679
Speaker 2: this is a beautiful life that I'd never imagined I

558
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:39,120
Speaker 2: could ever have, and a beautiful love and so I'm

559
00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:42,600
Speaker 2: not like I I And that's what even with Alan,

560
00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:44,080
Speaker 2: when I told him, I was like, do you want

561
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:46,520
Speaker 2: to know about the things, And He's just like I

562
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,399
Speaker 2: don't care. He's like, I love who you are and

563
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:51,720
Speaker 2: how that's shaped you. And I mean, obviously he knows

564
00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:53,959
Speaker 2: now and we've talked about it. But that was one

565
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 2: of my favorite things about him when I first met him,

566
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:58,439
Speaker 2: because he it didn't even make him flinch. Yeah, you know,

567
00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 2: it didn't make me feel crazy, didn't make me feel

568
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:02,560
Speaker 2: like I had to defend myself. He was just like,

569
00:27:03,160 --> 00:27:06,040
Speaker 2: you're a warrior and I love you and you know. Yeah,

570
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 2: so that again, that piece has been great and I'm

571
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:14,960
Speaker 2: not like though there is pieces of shame in it.

572
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:18,160
Speaker 2: It's just because of the comments and stuff. But I'm

573
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:24,320
Speaker 2: so grateful for that path. Yeah done, moving on. Absolutely,

574
00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:27,119
Speaker 2: I just want everyone to be happy. That is the

575
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:31,000
Speaker 2: take that. That is the headline that I just I

576
00:27:31,119 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 2: just want everyone to be happy.

577
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:35,200
Speaker 3: Oh what else?

578
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 2: That's about all I got for you now that I'm yeah,

579
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:40,680
Speaker 2: I don't know.

580
00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:43,440
Speaker 3: That's this is what's going on in our world over here.

581
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 2: I feel like I should just like lean into it though,

582
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:47,800
Speaker 2: Like when I get on the plane, when I get

583
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:49,440
Speaker 2: on the plane to go to Scotland for our wedding,

584
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:50,480
Speaker 2: shed is be like fourth.

585
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 3: Time here we go.

586
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:54,320
Speaker 2: I mean I feel I should just play into it.

587
00:27:54,440 --> 00:27:55,719
Speaker 3: I feel like you should.

588
00:27:56,280 --> 00:27:59,680
Speaker 1: I mean again, you're gonna have people saying things either way,

589
00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 1: So either like make fun of yourself or.

590
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,119
Speaker 2: I kind of have like I did the other day

591
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:07,680
Speaker 2: on the story, I'm like, never done the second dress.

592
00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 2: I'd like if it just kind of makes me, you know, cackle.

593
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:18,360
Speaker 2: You can't hurt me because it already hurt me more so,

594
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:22,640
Speaker 2: I'm already doing it to myself people anyways, all right, Well,

595
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:24,520
Speaker 2: on that note, we need to try on some bridesmaid

596
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:27,800
Speaker 2: dresses that we have in the closet, so all right,

597
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 2: see you next way. See ya bye,