Speaker 1: Donkey up to day.
Speaker 2: Damn he hogged.
Speaker 1: It's time for donkey, I mean trying to be donkey today.
Speaker 3: No more.
Speaker 4: They should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm
Speaker 4: not making new people do these days.
Speaker 5: Called donkey of the day, and it really caught me
Speaker 5: off guard.
Speaker 4: Damn Charlamagne, who got the donkey.
Speaker 3: Out of the day today?
Speaker 2: Well, just hilarious.
Speaker 4: Donkey of to Day for Thursday, August twenty fourth goes
Speaker 4: to Wayne Parker. Now, Wayne is a prime example of
Speaker 4: money cannot buy you happiness and money cannot buy you
Speaker 4: what we all truly want, and that's love. Folks believe,
Speaker 4: for whatever reason that once you get the bag, all
Speaker 4: those things that are included. But the reality is happiness
Speaker 4: and love are sold separately and you truly can't even purchase.
Speaker 2: He's a one to day.
Speaker 4: See. Let me tell you the story about Wayne Parker.
Speaker 4: He's a wanted man. Okay, not wanted by the ladies,
Speaker 4: wanted by authorities all right, law enforcement, all right. According
Speaker 4: to the ny Post, he's been running from cops for
Speaker 4: nearly a year because he committed almost a million dollars
Speaker 4: in fraud. Oh, I can't make this up. Let's go
Speaker 4: to Suffix News for the report. Please.
Speaker 6: In October twenty twenty two, Wayne Parker of Maldenhall was
Speaker 6: found guilty of fraudulent trading after obtaining more than seven
Speaker 6: hundred and sixty five thousand pounds in credit from suppliers.
Speaker 6: An arrest warrant was issued when Parker failed to appear
Speaker 6: in court in February this year. Trading standards said Parker
Speaker 6: presented himself as a livestock owner, which allowed him to
Speaker 6: be given credit by a wide range of companies. He
Speaker 6: often made no attempt to settle his debts, and when
Speaker 6: he did, repeatedly sent checks that would bounce. Since going
Speaker 6: on the run, Parker is known to have been using
Speaker 6: the match dot com dating website and has also been
Speaker 6: hiring cars in a bid it is believed to avoid
Speaker 6: detection by the police.
Speaker 2: Okay, let me translate a little.
Speaker 4: Wayne is thirty five years old and he was found
Speaker 4: guilty of oweing all those pounds, which equates to nine
Speaker 4: hundred and seventy thousand dollars in US money to suppliers
Speaker 4: when he failed to show up in court in February
Speaker 4: for cenising. And you know when you don't show up
Speaker 4: to cenising for least beyond your ass, and that's exactly
Speaker 4: what happened. Wayne Parker has been on the run ever since,
Speaker 4: and I be leave that Wayne. He's gone to see
Speaker 4: jay Z and Beyonce's on the Run tour one too
Speaker 4: many times. Or from that tour he got the not
Speaker 4: so bright idea to think he could indeed be on
Speaker 4: the run and be crazy in love, dangerously in love.
Speaker 4: But he clearly made this decision when he was drunk
Speaker 4: in love wanting love, because this man decided to start
Speaker 4: looking for love.
Speaker 2: On Match dot Com.
Speaker 4: Now, I've never been on the run, and I would
Speaker 4: never go on the run if I committed a crime,
Speaker 4: because like presidential candidate Chris Christy, I just wouldn't be
Speaker 4: good at running.
Speaker 2: But if I.
Speaker 4: Did go on the run, I would think the first
Speaker 4: thing I would do is lay low. All right, that's
Speaker 4: the whole point of going on the lamb, right all right.
Speaker 4: Another thing I've never done is been on the dating
Speaker 4: app Okay, And so I did some research this morning,
Speaker 4: and by research, I'm in Google, and I realized that
Speaker 4: there's four easy steps you must do in order to
Speaker 4: land to date on Match dot com.
Speaker 2: First, they say you have.
Speaker 4: To nail the end my own words section because they
Speaker 4: say your profile has two main jobs. The grab a
Speaker 4: person's attention and keep it. You want to inform intrigue
Speaker 4: and keep the person wanting more. Wayne couldn't change his identity.
Speaker 4: He's an international man of mystery. And nothing says intrigue
Speaker 4: like fraud. So let's look at his dating profile. It
Speaker 4: says name Wayne Parker. Also goes by the name Sticky Fingers,
Speaker 4: Steve Scammy, Sammy hit A Lick, Rick Fraud, muhammad In Kazine, Gauzine, Kazeine,
Speaker 4: Kauzein is Oh, that's not Jerry. It makes sense now
Speaker 4: now now, says he says. It says about myself. We's
Speaker 4: financially stable as of last week. Love, long walks on
Speaker 4: the beach holding your hand and your debit card. Love,
Speaker 4: late night conversations about our path and past codes. Uh,
Speaker 4: which city were you born in? Name of your first pet?
Speaker 4: Things like that, And it says, I love whispering, sweet,
Speaker 4: nothing's in your ear? And I love when you whisper
Speaker 4: your social Security number in the mind. So far, Wayne
Speaker 4: Parker is checking off all the boxes. He's captured our
Speaker 4: attention with an interesting story. He's described his job in
Speaker 4: an interesting way. Oh, he hasn't actually a job. Oh,
Speaker 4: his occupation is untraceable. Why transfers, data collecting and telemarketing
Speaker 4: all makes sense?
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 4: He described a few of his hobbies and passions in life,
Speaker 4: and here goes the most important one.
Speaker 2: Describe the type of woman you are looking for. Wayne
Speaker 2: is looking for a woman.
Speaker 4: With good credit, a good shoulder on her heads, and
Speaker 4: somebody who is willing to share their life and pen
Speaker 4: number with him. Listen, man, Wayne Parker is still out there.
Speaker 4: I don't know how much longer you can run when
Speaker 4: all folks got to do is swipe right to see
Speaker 4: you exist. And I know that it's only a matter
Speaker 4: of time before you get arrested, because I am sure
Speaker 4: your match dot com profile is popping right now, and
Speaker 4: you're not even gonna be able to avoid hooking up
Speaker 4: with someone that you met on the site. Okay, and
Speaker 4: when you get the where you're going, it's gonna be
Speaker 4: a nice dinner, nice conversation.
Speaker 2: Hell, you might even get some dessert and her credit
Speaker 2: card number.
Speaker 4: But when that date is over, authorities will be right
Speaker 4: there waiting to put you in matching handcuffs to take
Speaker 4: you to get matching orange jumpsuits and match you up
Speaker 4: with a salemate who's looking to give you the runs
Speaker 4: because he wants love to.
Speaker 2: Please give Wayne Parker the sweet challenge of the Hamiltons.
Speaker 1: Oh no, you are the dog gee of the day,
Speaker 1: the dog gee all the day. Yee alright.
Speaker 2: BTC later who.
Speaker 1: All right?
Speaker 5: Everybody else? Earlier, Kiki during the room that she reported
Speaker 5: about Kevin Hart, and Kevin Hart had a little uh kerfuffle.
Speaker 2: No, he had a curve forty plus. Let's listen to
Speaker 2: what he said to.
Speaker 3: All my men women out there that are forty years
Speaker 3: old and above. It's not a game. Respect that age
Speaker 3: or that age will make you respect it. It's just
Speaker 3: public serface announcement. Because I know people may see me
Speaker 3: out and I don't want you to be alarm, but
Speaker 3: I'm in a wheelchair. Shout out to Steven wildly. I'm
Speaker 3: gonna go to put this story out there before you do.
Speaker 3: Me and Steven we got to little debate. This debate
Speaker 3: was based off of who was faster. Steven said, Kevi
Speaker 3: ain't no way you're gonna beat me. Steven is ex
Speaker 3: NFL running back play for the Patriots. I said, Steve,
Speaker 3: you can bet it. He said back, I said, bet
Speaker 3: we get out there, we go run a forty year
Speaker 3: old dash. Guys, I blew all. My tore my lord abdermen,
Speaker 3: my abductors are torn. I don't even know what that is,
Speaker 3: but I tore him. I can't walk. What are we
Speaker 3: competing for this age?
Speaker 6: Why we like?
Speaker 2: What am I doing? Stupid?
Speaker 3: And now I can't walk because I'm somewhere trying to
Speaker 3: get the title of the fastest the barbecue?
Speaker 2: All right, so.
Speaker 5: Question eight hundred and five eight five one oh five one?
Speaker 5: What are some signs you're getting old?
Speaker 4: I'm gonna tell you something, man, this I'm gonna tell
Speaker 4: you why. This is a great conversation because it's a
Speaker 4: lot of things you don't know you can do anymore
Speaker 4: when you forty plus until you do it.
Speaker 2: So we are gonna actually save some people this morning.
Speaker 2: Come about you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: What a's some signs?
Speaker 4: It was quickly.
Speaker 5: I'm just curious you got one.
Speaker 2: I had to think about it.
Speaker 5: We'll talk about it when we come back after Well,
Speaker 5: for me, I know the main one is I take
Speaker 5: grown man naps, That's what I call him.
Speaker 2: Oh, I've been doing that.
Speaker 4: That's that's nothing. I'm forty five years old. I'm gonn
Speaker 4: take the natural release for ten years.
Speaker 5: We'll talk about it when we come back. All right,
Speaker 5: eight hundred five eight five one oh five one. Kiki,
Speaker 5: our co host is here. Our guess co hosts head.
Speaker 2: And already told us what she can't do.
Speaker 1: What baby, that's just.
Speaker 5: Because I'm big, Oh right right, Jesus Christ, It's the
Speaker 5: Breakfast Club.
Speaker 2: Good morning, donkey.
Speaker 4: Today is brought to you by the law office of
Speaker 4: Michael Slammingsoft.
Speaker 2: Don't be a donkey. Dob pound two fifty on your
Speaker 2: cell and say the bull.
Speaker 4: If you've been hurting a construction accident, that's pound two
Speaker 4: five oh from your cell and say the bull.