WEBVTT - Second Date Update: Muppet Dinner

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<v Speaker 1>Second date update. We got an email for a second

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<v Speaker 1>date update from one of our listeners named Gabe, who

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<v Speaker 1>says he brought along some friends on his first date

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<v Speaker 1>and it'd be fun. Apparently Gabe did not get a kiss,

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<v Speaker 1>but one of his friends did from his date. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not sure, but all I know is now he wants

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<v Speaker 1>our help. So Gabe, what's up? Man? Welcome to the show. Hey,

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<v Speaker 1>happy to be on. Thanks for taking a call. You

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<v Speaker 1>are an I try to be Okay, Okay. We'll get

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<v Speaker 1>into the details every date in just a second here,

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<v Speaker 1>but first, tell us a little bit about the woman

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<v Speaker 1>that you went out with. What's her name? Where'd you

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<v Speaker 1>meet her? What's her net worth? Give us, give us

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<v Speaker 1>a rundown. Her name's Noel, a very very pretty blond girl.

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<v Speaker 1>We met on a dating nap and we met up

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<v Speaker 1>to this really great pizzeria in town. Yeah. I asked

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<v Speaker 1>that she wouldn't tell Okay, stubborn. So we got some

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<v Speaker 1>Hawaiian pizza. Oh controversial that you both like Hawaiian. You

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<v Speaker 1>don't find that many people out there who like it.

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<v Speaker 1>So I was like, I real pizza, No it is,

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<v Speaker 1>I love it too. We're not getting into this discussion

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<v Speaker 1>during this second day pizza. No, we're not We're not

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<v Speaker 1>doing it. Let's just focus on your date, Gabe. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>tell us more about the horrible pizza that you guys. Shit,

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<v Speaker 1>we we had a bunch of that delicious pizza. And

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<v Speaker 1>you know, like you said, I did bring out my friends.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, it said specifically in my profile that this

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<v Speaker 1>is who I am, what I'm about. Wait, what do

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<v Speaker 1>you mean You're about Hawaiian pizza with friends? So I

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<v Speaker 1>am a professional amateur up impersonator. Professional amateur also got

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<v Speaker 1>me lost if that was on your profile? Yes, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>and match. So your your friends aren't actual people there, puppets. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>that is correct. Yes, I see. Are you you're like

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<v Speaker 1>a ventriloquist or something too, Like you make the puppets talk,

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<v Speaker 1>Not so much ventriloquis as it is just like a performance.

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<v Speaker 1>Like sometimes I'm behind like a fake rock or something,

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<v Speaker 1>or I'm insider really uncomfortable couch and I do muppet

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<v Speaker 1>voices and stuff like that. Okay, So I'm just trying

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<v Speaker 1>to picture this now. So you're in a pizzeria with

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<v Speaker 1>your your muppet friends now joining you at the table.

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<v Speaker 1>You say, you say you do the voices too. Oh yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>can you give me like a sample of how that

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<v Speaker 1>date would go? So naturally I brought out Kermit the

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<v Speaker 1>Frog first. That's how you break the ice. Though, it

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<v Speaker 1>was how are you doing? Are you enjoying the date?

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<v Speaker 1>I see you're not eating as many as of the

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<v Speaker 1>pineapple as he is. Okay, you know he was trying

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<v Speaker 1>to gasp me up a little bit, but okay, okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Kermit's cute. Yeah. I don't think of Kermit as like

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<v Speaker 1>a typical like charmer of women, though he seems kind

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<v Speaker 1>of shy. No, I think Kermie smooth. That's the thing.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, no one's expecting Kermit. Everyone wants you to

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<v Speaker 1>go with Fawzi, your animal or someone crazy, but in

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<v Speaker 1>Kermit when you want to show a little heart. How

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<v Speaker 1>did she react to Kermit? She was laughing, she was

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<v Speaker 1>having a good time. Then naturally I brought out Miss

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<v Speaker 1>Piggy so that there could be a bit of a

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<v Speaker 1>back and forth. You know, we had a double date

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<v Speaker 1>for a little while. And how did Miss Piggy sound Kermie?

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<v Speaker 1>I think he's doing except really well on this date.

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<v Speaker 1>He don't bother them. They're doing their own things. Cat

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<v Speaker 1>it drock. I think you're you're just good enough, and

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<v Speaker 1>I can totally tell which one you're doing. So you're

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<v Speaker 1>sitting at the table, do you have muppets? Like, do

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<v Speaker 1>you have the actual dolls with you? Or is this

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<v Speaker 1>just voices? I have two bags worth, So it looked

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<v Speaker 1>a little weird because I just had two Duffel bags

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<v Speaker 1>with me, But it seemed like the whole restaurant was

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<v Speaker 1>actually having a good time along with it, because more

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<v Speaker 1>often than not, when you bust out two muppets, people

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<v Speaker 1>are gonna take notes. So yeah, no, I mean, the

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<v Speaker 1>thing is if she was laughing through it, women love humor.

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<v Speaker 1>But how long did it go for? I was wondering,

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<v Speaker 1>not too Yeah it was it was like forty five

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<v Speaker 1>to ten minutes break. Yeah, an intermission where she got

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<v Speaker 1>to go to the bathroom and then come back. Yeah. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I did say, you know, I went to the bathroom

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<v Speaker 1>once and I was like, hey, if you're just gonna

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<v Speaker 1>like leave right now, I totally get it, no stress.

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<v Speaker 1>But well and behold she was still there when I

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<v Speaker 1>came back, inte to walk out. I wish that. Did

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<v Speaker 1>you ever get to know anything about Noel? Yeah? She

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<v Speaker 1>she's in the pharmaceutical. I guess that's that's what she's doing. Well, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>sound she's drug addicts. I mean, Gabe. Normally I would

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<v Speaker 1>ask our listeners if there was any awkward moments that

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<v Speaker 1>happened during the date. I feel like I don't need

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<v Speaker 1>to ask that the whole day. There was one funny

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<v Speaker 1>moment when Kermit and Miss Piggie started arguing over the pizza.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, it got heated. Let me guess miss Piggy

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<v Speaker 1>not a fan of pineapple and pizzas what you're saying. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>Miss Piggie was not having the Canadian bacon. She got

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<v Speaker 1>midway through with sply and just went, wait, what's on

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<v Speaker 1>this frock? Like naturally, Kermit did. I could see that

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<v Speaker 1>throwing a wrench in your date. For sure. You said though,

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<v Speaker 1>that one of your friends got a kiss, so admittedly

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<v Speaker 1>I kind of went for a kiss. I may have

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<v Speaker 1>been a little quick to the shot because I had

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<v Speaker 1>a Kermit on me still, and she instead, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>went to go kiss Kermit, which I get it. I

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<v Speaker 1>get it, that's how it goes sometimes. But I'm sure

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<v Speaker 1>Miss Piggy didn't feel good about that either. It was

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<v Speaker 1>one heck of a car ride home, I'll say, two

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<v Speaker 1>women upset at you after your date. Well, I'm imagine

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<v Speaker 1>the bags are moving on their own. Yeah. How long

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<v Speaker 1>has it been, Gabe since you and Noel last spoke.

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<v Speaker 1>It's been like a week week and a half. You know.

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<v Speaker 1>We said we were gonna set up like a brunch

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<v Speaker 1>or something afterwards. Like she seemed really into the idea.

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<v Speaker 1>I text or a bunch of times, but I still

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<v Speaker 1>haven't heard anything back. I just kind of, do you

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<v Speaker 1>tell her that the puppets wouldn't come on the second date?

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<v Speaker 1>I did. I said, maybe it's mostly just Gabe this time. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>mostly we have a lot to work with here, Kermit,

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<v Speaker 1>what do you think we should do in this situation?

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<v Speaker 1>I think we should perhaps play a song really quick

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<v Speaker 1>and then come back and call the well, try and

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<v Speaker 1>get your second date update. That's what Kermit does. Right.

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<v Speaker 1>That was great. We'll come back and we'll call him

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<v Speaker 1>well for a second date update. All right after this time?

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<v Speaker 1>Second date? If you're just joining us one of our listeners,

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<v Speaker 1>Gabe went out for pizza with a woman named Noel recently,

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<v Speaker 1>and they were joined by some of his friends, Kermit

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<v Speaker 1>and Miss Piggy. Because Gabe is a quote professional amateur

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<v Speaker 1>puppets here. Actually, yeah, yeah, we've already got over that guy.

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<v Speaker 1>That's it's an issue. He actually brought along some of

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<v Speaker 1>his muppets with him and basically put on a show

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<v Speaker 1>at the pizzeria. Yeah, and we heard a lot about

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<v Speaker 1>what the puppets said and did and eight. But Gabe,

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<v Speaker 1>we never talked about alcohol on the date. Was Kermit

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<v Speaker 1>getting turned? Oh? Maybe not Kermit, but Gabe was for sure? Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>yeah that makes sense. I means the thing is, Gabe,

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<v Speaker 1>do you have any regrets about your Muppet show? I

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<v Speaker 1>mean it went on forty five minutes long. Um no,

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<v Speaker 1>absolutely not. Okay. I like that. A man that stands

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<v Speaker 1>behind its people, it's confident. Yeah, women respond to that.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's been a week and Noel is still not

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<v Speaker 1>calling you back. On a scale of one to one

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<v Speaker 1>hundred percent, what are the chances that the reason she

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<v Speaker 1>isn't calling you is because of the puppets. That's a

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<v Speaker 1>good question. I'm gonna say fifty good. I can see

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<v Speaker 1>that someone's either gonna be oh that's so funny and cute.

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<v Speaker 1>Are they're going to be like, dude, it's a date.

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<v Speaker 1>I wasn't feeling that there's no one between Yeah, I agree. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>well let's find out which fifty percent it lies on.

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<v Speaker 1>We're gonna dial Noel's number right now. We're gonna get

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<v Speaker 1>your second day dup date. Okay, okay. You know at

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<v Speaker 1>the end of the day it was on my profile.

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<v Speaker 1>She knew what she was getting into. Yeah, yeah, no regrets,

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<v Speaker 1>all right. I like that. That's what Kermy would say.

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<v Speaker 1>The number right now here we go. Hello, Hi, is

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<v Speaker 1>this Noel? Yes, hey, Noel. My name is jeff from

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<v Speaker 1>the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. How

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<v Speaker 1>are you doing? Um? Who is from a morning radio show?

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<v Speaker 1>It's called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Yeah, heard

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<v Speaker 1>of it? Okay, well cool, Thank you. Thanks for listening,

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<v Speaker 1>or at least knowing someone that else someone else that listens. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I want to know what you want. Okay, okay, I'll

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<v Speaker 1>just get right to it. Then, this is a segment

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<v Speaker 1>that we do call the second Date Update. That's where

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<v Speaker 1>if you go out with one of our listeners and afterwards,

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<v Speaker 1>if you're not calling them back, they reach out to

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<v Speaker 1>us to call you so we can help them figure

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<v Speaker 1>out the reason why Okay, okay, who is this? Well again,

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<v Speaker 1>my name's Jeff like the namesake Brooke and Jeffrey. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>Jeff you are, But who was the guy? I'm just

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<v Speaker 1>clar because Jeffrey you're Maybe Jeffrey is so nervous for

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<v Speaker 1>some reason. No, while it's awesome, I mean there's a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of you guys talking. I don't try to get

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<v Speaker 1>to the point. Yeah, okay, I don't want to waste

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<v Speaker 1>your time here. So right the listener that we're calling,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm working. The listener's name is Gabe. Do you remember

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<v Speaker 1>going out with Gabe? Yeah, he actually called you guys. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>because it makes sense he would do something like that. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>what do you mean, because he must have too much

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<v Speaker 1>time on his hands? This makes sense? Ok Can I

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<v Speaker 1>just ask because he said that you guys met on

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<v Speaker 1>a dating app. When you saw on the dating app

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<v Speaker 1>that he was a professional amateur puppeteer, what were you thinking?

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<v Speaker 1>I was fine with date. So I'm into theater. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I like eclectic guy. Okay, so you're kind of excited

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<v Speaker 1>about the date then, yeah, but he took it too far,

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<v Speaker 1>which which part of it went too far from the

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<v Speaker 1>whole thing from beginning to end. Oh, so you're talking

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<v Speaker 1>about the pizza. The pizza was way over the line. No, dummy,

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<v Speaker 1>that's fine. I don't care about the pizza. Have you

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<v Speaker 1>thought about the puppet? Can you describe the date from

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<v Speaker 1>your perspective, because the way he describes it, it sounds

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<v Speaker 1>like a quirky fun night of a puppet performance and

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<v Speaker 1>pizza like it sounded really innocent. That would have been fine.

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<v Speaker 1>That was the truth. Okay. I don't get quirky fun

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<v Speaker 1>vibes from So what's the truth? What was it really like? Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>so for the beginning it was okay. I wasn't really

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<v Speaker 1>surprised because that's what I write in his full flock.

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<v Speaker 1>But I just don't like it shouldn't have to be

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<v Speaker 1>on a date, don't Okay, it's weird off the back. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>that's why he's single, if that's what he's been doing.

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<v Speaker 1>Well he walked in with two Duffel bags full of puppets,

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<v Speaker 1>Yes he did. And I didn't know if you just

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<v Speaker 1>want to bomb the place or about a credit card

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<v Speaker 1>out of the air, I don't know. Yeah, weird. So

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<v Speaker 1>when you got to the first puppet character, what was

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<v Speaker 1>your reaction that was okay. I was like, okay, let

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<v Speaker 1>me just endure this and embrace this. It was cute.

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<v Speaker 1>It was cool to comment and miss piggy thing or whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>That was fine. But then when he the other puppet

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<v Speaker 1>was like this mafia guy. I think it's Joe Lavender.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know why he's called the Lavender right, Lavender

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<v Speaker 1>supposed to be peaceful, okay, so you know how when

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<v Speaker 1>somebody has the puppet, he's speaking into the puppet, and

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<v Speaker 1>the guy was harasses, kind of suggestive, like come on,

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<v Speaker 1>hes gonna put me in the body bag, and he

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<v Speaker 1>tried to kiss me. So body beds what's the Roman

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<v Speaker 1>said this funny? Hold on? Who is talking on them?

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<v Speaker 1>Marching the good name of Joe Lavender and Joe Lavend

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<v Speaker 1>I really got on the other line like that. So noell,

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<v Speaker 1>I was supposed to let you know at a time

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<v Speaker 1>when it was convenient that gavesman on the other line

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<v Speaker 1>listening and wants to talk to you. But it sounds

0:12:15.320 --> 0:12:18.960
<v Speaker 1>like Joe Lavender might be weird. Oh Mann sing my song,

0:12:19.240 --> 0:12:22.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm mafia esque. I'm not involved with no bodies or

0:12:22.160 --> 0:12:27.760
<v Speaker 1>no things. I'm just Joe. She didn't like Joe Lavender.

0:12:27.800 --> 0:12:29.760
<v Speaker 1>Why would you be doing Joe Lavender? Did you not

0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:33.040
<v Speaker 1>hear what she said? Oh? I cannot believe you would

0:12:33.040 --> 0:12:38.840
<v Speaker 1>do this, shared man after shad Hawaiian slices. This is

0:12:38.880 --> 0:12:44.600
<v Speaker 1>the disrespect that you are paying me. Well, can you

0:12:44.720 --> 0:12:49.319
<v Speaker 1>stop herman? Can you stop Joe Lavender? Ye? Put Joe

0:12:49.440 --> 0:12:51.839
<v Speaker 1>Lavender back in the bag. And we'd like to talk

0:12:51.880 --> 0:12:56.320
<v Speaker 1>to Gabe please. Oh hey, guys, Hey, guys, what's up? Hey,

0:12:56.360 --> 0:13:00.400
<v Speaker 1>welcome back. Gave me up this falling. It's a weird. Yeah,

0:13:00.440 --> 0:13:03.000
<v Speaker 1>we'll get your weird and there's a waste on our time.

0:13:03.320 --> 0:13:07.040
<v Speaker 1>Maybe it'd be useful to help Gabe be a better

0:13:07.120 --> 0:13:13.200
<v Speaker 1>data in the future if your therapist she brings up

0:13:13.240 --> 0:13:16.440
<v Speaker 1>a good point. Gabe, are you listening to anything she

0:13:16.559 --> 0:13:19.640
<v Speaker 1>just said? Could you have an apology? I mean she

0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:24.280
<v Speaker 1>was offended. What I will say, Noel, I'm sorry that's

0:13:24.280 --> 0:13:29.439
<v Speaker 1>how you feel it went. I offer no apologies, and

0:13:29.520 --> 0:13:32.840
<v Speaker 1>not to my puppets. I listen. I'm glad you want

0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:34.800
<v Speaker 1>to be yourself. I hope it works for your future.

0:13:37.840 --> 0:13:43.120
<v Speaker 1>Off So, Noel, I'm guessing you don't really like Gabe

0:13:43.160 --> 0:13:46.199
<v Speaker 1>that much. I mean, no, I try to and it

0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:51.800
<v Speaker 1>just went too extra bizarre too, extra bizarre hashtag day.

0:13:51.920 --> 0:13:55.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm sensing a lot of There's a lot of friction here, obviously,

0:13:56.120 --> 0:13:58.520
<v Speaker 1>but friction is what you need to create a spark,

0:13:58.600 --> 0:14:01.720
<v Speaker 1>and spark starts a fire. I think fire burned. Everything

0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:03.600
<v Speaker 1>is this weird? You're going to ask so well, if

0:14:03.600 --> 0:14:06.040
<v Speaker 1>she wants to go out again, I would love I'm

0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:08.800
<v Speaker 1>not going out with him again. Okay, maybe if you

0:14:08.840 --> 0:14:10.679
<v Speaker 1>won't go out with gay, but maybe you'll go out

0:14:10.720 --> 0:14:14.840
<v Speaker 1>with Joe Lavender. Can we put Joe Lavender on the line, Joe, yes,

0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:17.559
<v Speaker 1>Joe Lavenders here. Hey, it's lonely at the top. It's

0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:21.640
<v Speaker 1>lonely at the top, it's lonely at the bottom, because

0:14:21.640 --> 0:14:28.920
<v Speaker 1>you're weird. Very well, frankly, I can't. He was censoring

0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:35.200
<v Speaker 1>himself quite a bit. That was holding back that awesome

0:14:36.160 --> 0:14:39.400
<v Speaker 1>after Midnight. It's a whole of the story. I don't

0:14:39.400 --> 0:14:43.440
<v Speaker 1>know how to know it after Midnight episode. I've never

0:14:43.520 --> 0:14:46.480
<v Speaker 1>seen him on a Netflix special about being a weird

0:14:46.640 --> 0:14:50.520
<v Speaker 1>puppet murderers. Hell no, that is a compliment, and I

0:14:50.560 --> 0:14:55.440
<v Speaker 1>appreciate that. Oh okay, I'm ringing up. I'm all right,

0:14:55.880 --> 0:14:59.400
<v Speaker 1>thank you for your time. Pulling me through some radio

0:14:59.480 --> 0:15:05.400
<v Speaker 1>station Oh my god, you can hang up down. Noels, Gabe,

0:15:05.560 --> 0:15:08.800
<v Speaker 1>it doesn't seem like she was the best match for you. Hey,

0:15:08.960 --> 0:15:10.680
<v Speaker 1>you know, there are a lot of fish out in

0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:13.880
<v Speaker 1>that sea, and I plan on swimming. Really, I would say, like,

0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:17.400
<v Speaker 1>good luck. Maybe we worked that whole Joe Lavender character

0:15:17.520 --> 0:15:20.680
<v Speaker 1>a little bit more. No, I think I think Joe's

0:15:20.680 --> 0:15:26.360
<v Speaker 1>pretty good. I think it's everyone else with the problem. Okay, Hey, Gabe, man,

0:15:26.560 --> 0:15:28.480
<v Speaker 1>if you hear a knock at your door later, it's

0:15:28.520 --> 0:15:30.640
<v Speaker 1>not because I had somebody go over to check you

0:15:30.640 --> 0:15:32.960
<v Speaker 1>out to make sure that you're you know, Okay, Yeah,

0:15:34.480 --> 0:15:36.440
<v Speaker 1>no need to worry. I'm glad I'm on the radio.

0:15:36.440 --> 0:15:40.360
<v Speaker 1>Doesn't you gonna get a show now? Yeah? You know what, Joe,

0:15:40.400 --> 0:15:42.760
<v Speaker 1>you can take over from my position because I'm obviously

0:15:42.840 --> 0:15:46.280
<v Speaker 1>terrible at Okay, here we go. This is Broken Joe

0:15:46.320 --> 0:15:53.120
<v Speaker 1>in the Morning, putting them tunes from morning until good pass.

0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:56.440
<v Speaker 1>Broken Jeffrey in the Morning.