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Speaker 1: I saved a man's life, and he thanked me by

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Speaker 1: sewing me for everything I've got.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if that's how you thank someone, unless

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Speaker 2: maybe you're in America. We're the most so happy freaking

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Speaker 2: country on earth.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, if you don't sue someone, do you really love that?

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Speaker 1: Give me a million dollars? I'm taking you to court.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I love you, Yeah, but also can I have

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Speaker 4: your number?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 1: I was eating at a diner with some friends at

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Speaker 1: three am. The guy in the next booth to us

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Speaker 1: started poffing and gagging. I realized he was choking and

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Speaker 1: went to help. I had heimlike training at my place

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Speaker 1: of work. I'm an office safety manager for my floor,

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Speaker 1: and the guy managed to get the thing out and

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Speaker 1: flew across the booth. He looked really pissed, paid his

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Speaker 1: bill and left. What pissed for saving?

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Speaker 2: Why'd you see, bro, I'm just imagining that scene of

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Speaker 2: Mister Incredibles. Literally, that guy's like jumping off to kill himself,

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Speaker 2: and Mister Incredible is like, I'm going to save you,

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Speaker 2: and he saves them, and the guy's like, I didn't

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Speaker 2: ask to be saved, and then like sues him.

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Speaker 4: In court. This is literally a mister incredible.

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Speaker 1: I felt like a hero for the rest of the

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Speaker 1: dinner and then just kind of forgot about it.

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Speaker 4: That was two weeks ago.

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Speaker 1: Today I got a letter from a law firm saying

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Speaker 1: that I'm getting sued for battery.

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Speaker 4: They I bruised a rib trying.

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Speaker 1: To save that dude's life. Do you want Bruce rib

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Speaker 1: or life? I have no clue how this guy figured

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Speaker 1: out who I am. I thought I helped the guy,

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Speaker 1: seeing as you probably would have choked without my help.

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Speaker 1: How did he figure out who I am? I've never

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Speaker 1: even spoken to him. Is this a real letter?

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Speaker 4: I need this so much, right, like my goodness.

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Speaker 1: To clarify language I used to describe him choking was wrong.

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Speaker 1: He had choking in gagging sounds, but was otherwise silent

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Speaker 1: and obviously distressed. Updates well, I took y'all's advice and

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Speaker 1: went back to the restaurant, and I spent about an

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Speaker 1: hour and a half waiting, and then I spoke to

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Speaker 1: a shift manager, who called a general manager, who called

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Speaker 1: the owner, and they swore.

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Speaker 4: Up and down.

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Speaker 1: No one came in asking for a tape or anything

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Speaker 1: like that. So basically a tape of you know what,

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Speaker 1: actually potential use against him, right, although he should.

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Speaker 2: Still get the tape, so I'm just some evidence of

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Speaker 2: the good deed that he did.

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Speaker 4: That is true.

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Speaker 1: Then I started looking for defense attorneys, but I wasn't

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Speaker 1: sure exactly how to proceed. Honestly, this week, I've been

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Speaker 1: mortify and really on edge.

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Speaker 2: I can imagine thinking about like what kind of lawyer

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Speaker 2: you need to get, maybe doing some consultations.

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Speaker 4: And lawyers ain't cheap.

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Speaker 1: Finally, when I told my friends about everything, one of

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Speaker 1: them fested up to the fact that it was actually

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Speaker 1: them and they made it up some kind of prank.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's a pretty rough rank dude, it's

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Speaker 2: too much, pretty twisted joke.

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Speaker 4: I wasn't laughing.

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Speaker 1: I'm pretty pissed and seriously reconsidering my relationship with him.

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Speaker 1: I appreciate everyone's support, though, excluding the people who made

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Speaker 1: fun of my mother's passing and try to figure.

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Speaker 4: Out where I live.

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Speaker 3: But what are you doing?

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Speaker 4: It all got a chill trying to tell his story.

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Speaker 1: I mean, oh, geez, I bet there's someone who's like

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Speaker 1: kind of fake lawsuit before that's watching this right now, like.

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Speaker 4: Like, what's the worst prank that has been pulled on. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: is there anything?

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Speaker 1: I mean, this is kind of light in the grain

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Speaker 1: scheme of things, if you can beat it.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's not as like there was no actual

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Speaker 2: action taken to get a lawyer and there was any

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Speaker 2: money taken out. Yeah, I feel like it's relatively harmless. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but super stressful for that week, for sure. For sure,

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Speaker 2: what would you do?

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Speaker 4: Let us know?

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Speaker 2: And title parents get mad because her child can't do

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Speaker 2: anything they want?

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Speaker 4: Okay, Op, why why why can't my child do anything? Like? Yeah,

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Speaker 4: let child do murder? Yeah, murder.

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Speaker 2: I want my child to murder you, stab you in

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Speaker 2: the calf and that and that should be okay.

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Speaker 1: Why is we why as we as society cannot accept that?

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Speaker 4: Why? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Obviously I thought we were more progressive than that. I thought,

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Speaker 2: But I guess I guess not.

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Speaker 4: I guess not. That was a joke, so sad joke.

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Speaker 4: I want my children to murder. Yeah, Sam's not joking. Okay,

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Speaker 4: this just happened yesterday.

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Speaker 2: And it's a little short, but it's totally worth it,

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Speaker 2: all right, just like a toddler's a little short, totally

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Speaker 2: worth it sometimes. Yeah, and my penis a little short,

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Speaker 2: totally worth it. Blow your world, baby. So we went

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Speaker 2: to the small carnival with food stands and rides for

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Speaker 2: the smaller kids. My brother is ten and I'm fourteen.

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Speaker 2: This will be very important pretty soon.

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Speaker 4: Okay.

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Speaker 2: He wanted to go on the bouncy house for whatever reason,

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Speaker 2: so we waited in line for a little and my

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Speaker 2: brother finally got in. However, entitled mother an entitled kid

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Speaker 2: comes along and title kid says, Mummy, I want to

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Speaker 2: go in. Keep in mind these are the ones that

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Speaker 2: I have slides, ladders, et cetera. Then the nice employee

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Speaker 2: came along. He says in a convoice, ma'am, only one

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Speaker 2: kid can go on out a town. She then says, angrily,

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Speaker 2: shut the dog up. My child can do whatever he wants.

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Speaker 2: He's my little angel. I was incredibly shocked, but since

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Speaker 2: the employee is distracted, the kid went inside with my brother.

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Speaker 2: My brother completed the course and got out, and the

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Speaker 2: kid was almost done too. But instead of sliding down

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Speaker 2: the slide, she slid down the ladder. Slide down a ladder,

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Speaker 2: Uh I do not know?

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Speaker 4: A fire pole style? Yeah? Yeah, like kind of.

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Speaker 2: The ladder had small bumps, kind of like speed bumps.

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Speaker 2: Because of this, the kid goes flying and hit the

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Speaker 2: four hard. But she was lucky that the bouncy house

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Speaker 2: was big enough, or else she would have hit the

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Speaker 2: cement and broke her pelvis probably.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god. The entitled mother screams, and the guy saying.

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Speaker 3: My brother's daughter is there because of you. You'll be

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Speaker 3: hearing from my lawyer.

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Speaker 2: But the employee said, in a calm voice, once more, ma'am,

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Speaker 2: you need to leave the park now. She left and

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Speaker 2: picked up her crying kid. I said him, I'm so

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Speaker 2: sorry you had to experience that. Please take this money,

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Speaker 2: he said, while smiling. Thanks, man, I really appreciate that.

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Speaker 4: That's cool.

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Speaker 2: And then me and my brother walked back to the

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Speaker 2: car with my mom and went home. I'm still wondering

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Speaker 2: why people like that go in public or even breed

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Speaker 2: at all.

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Speaker 4: Wow, that's insane. Insane, bro.

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Speaker 2: If you if you let your children do whatever they want,

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Speaker 2: they should experience the consequences of that, like breaking their pelviss.

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Speaker 4: We should sue them. Yeah, let's sue them. Sue all

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Speaker 4: the entitled children.

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Speaker 2: All the entitled children get up in court class action lawsuit, uh,

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Speaker 2: and the class action is uh. Soap they gotta you

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Speaker 2: know that. You know the classic, you know, old old

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Speaker 2: uh oh. Clean their mouth. Yeah, clean their mouth with soap.

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Speaker 2: Let's let's run it back ancient punishment, that's right,