Speaker 1: Hey, fam I'm Jada Pinkett Smith and this is the
Speaker 1: Red Table Pop podcast all your favorite episodes from the
Speaker 1: Faithful Watch Show in audio produced by Westbrook Audio and
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio. Please don't forget to rate and review
Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts. It was the scandal that sparked national outrage,
Speaker 1: landed her famous parents in prison, and tore her life apart.
Speaker 1: In March nineteen. Olivia Jade was a successful lifestyle and
Speaker 1: beauty influencer, with major brand deals, even her own makeup line,
Speaker 1: This is Olivia Jade. But during her freshman year at
Speaker 1: the University of Southern California, Olivia's world came crashing down.
Speaker 1: Her parents, actress Lori Laughlin known to a generation as
Speaker 1: Aunt Becky from Full House, and fashion designer Massa Mogia Newley,
Speaker 1: were arrested. I'm definitely ready to address some things. Her
Speaker 1: parents were among dozens charged for bribing and cheating to
Speaker 1: get their kids into top universities. We're here today to
Speaker 1: announce charges in the largest college admission scam ever prosecuted
Speaker 1: by the Department of Justice. Lori and Masimo had hired
Speaker 1: college counselor Rick Singer, the mastermind behind the illegal college scheme.
Speaker 1: The couple allegedly paid five hundred thousand dollars to get
Speaker 1: their daughters in the USC. Olivia was at the center
Speaker 1: of the scandal. She was vilified for her entitlement, fired
Speaker 1: from brands, and removed herself from public life. Her parents
Speaker 1: are now in federal prison. Today, Olivia is finally ready
Speaker 1: to break her silence and address the controversy. Do you
Speaker 1: have any understanding of why I would be upset at
Speaker 1: your being here? It's like, child, Please, we are about
Speaker 1: to meet with a young lady, m Olivia Jade. A
Speaker 1: lot of people are gonna have a lot of opinions
Speaker 1: about her story. She called and I wanted to come
Speaker 1: to our table, um, and we all had very different
Speaker 1: feelings about it. Yeah, yeah, you know. I fought it
Speaker 1: to the nail. I just found it really ironic that, Um,
Speaker 1: she chose three black women to reach out to for
Speaker 1: her redemption story. I feel like, here, we are a
Speaker 1: white woman coming to black women for support when we
Speaker 1: don't get the same from them. It's just it's it's
Speaker 1: bothersome to me on so many levels. Her being here
Speaker 1: is the epitome of white privilege. Privilege to me, I
Speaker 1: understand where you're coming from. But let me just be clear.
Speaker 1: I never want to be the thing that was done
Speaker 1: to me by white women. I never want to be there.
Speaker 1: I also believe that these are the kind of attitudes
Speaker 1: that feed the same thing that we're fighting. It's like
Speaker 1: people look at us, they say you're black and your female,
Speaker 1: and they automatically put us in a category. So looking
Speaker 1: at her as being white, young, and privileged and then
Speaker 1: putting her in a category, it's the same thing. So
Speaker 1: I just see it as this cycle. It's not our
Speaker 1: responsibility to raise her consciousness. There's gonna be lots of
Speaker 1: people that agree with you, and we're gonna get heat. Yeah, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're gonna get heat. I also feel like this is
Speaker 1: a practice of compassion. To me, this young girl is
Speaker 1: reaping the repercussions of some actions of her parents. When
Speaker 1: I heard her story, it just reminded me of Jaden
Speaker 1: Willow and Trey. It didn't remind me of them at all,
Speaker 1: it did for me as a parent. I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: I've been in that position with me thinking I know
Speaker 1: what's best for my kids, and then they suffered the
Speaker 1: consequence of it. So you think that she didn't understand
Speaker 1: what was going on because they did the same thing
Speaker 1: for her sister. Bottom line, we can't act like we
Speaker 1: know exactly what happened. At the end of the day,
Speaker 1: I really feel like she's gonna be okay, you know,
Speaker 1: and she's gonna be harb But whether her aunt was
Speaker 1: sitting at this table or not, maybe maybe not, that's
Speaker 1: not something that we could say. It's like this, just
Speaker 1: because you have privilege, it doesn't exempt you the fact
Speaker 1: that Willow for so long suffered in silence and even
Speaker 1: turned to self harming herself because she didn't feel like
Speaker 1: she had a right to be hurt. I've had to
Speaker 1: deal with that part as well. People go, your kids
Speaker 1: are gonna be fine because they're rich. We don't care.
Speaker 1: But that's painful and it's not true exactly. I feel
Speaker 1: like Olivia deserves a space. Obviously you do because I
Speaker 1: thought it. And guess what, she's gonna be sitting right there.
Speaker 1: That's what this table is about. This table is about growth.
Speaker 1: What I'm trying to do listening to both of you guys,
Speaker 1: is I'm sitting in between the two truths and going, Okay,
Speaker 1: there has to be a way that these can blend.
Speaker 1: Just a little bit because both are a hud, valid
Speaker 1: and true in their worlds. Feelings are what they are,
Speaker 1: and that's okay, totally Yeah, so let's carry on to
Speaker 1: the red table. All right, let's should we bring a chair? Hi?
Speaker 1: My heart is racing out of at the table? How
Speaker 1: is everybody? I'm nervous. You guys should feel my heart.
Speaker 1: It's like, but I'm excited. I think I'm definitely ready
Speaker 1: to address some things and I can't think of a
Speaker 1: better place. So thank you for having me. Yeah, what
Speaker 1: made you want to come to the table? I think
Speaker 1: that this has been like a really eye opening experience
Speaker 1: for me in situation and although there's a lot of
Speaker 1: negative around it and there's a lot of mistakes and wrongdoings,
Speaker 1: it's led me to have a completely different outlook on
Speaker 1: a lot of situations. I also felt like I wanted
Speaker 1: to be somewhere where I I didn't feel like attacked
Speaker 1: and maybe I could feel more understood. I've watched the
Speaker 1: show and I think you guys are all amazing and
Speaker 1: it feels really safe, but it also feels honest, and
Speaker 1: it feels like we're going to all lay it out
Speaker 1: here and it's going to be like an open conversation,
Speaker 1: which is really important to me as well. I got it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: your mom's been in prison for a few weeks. Your
Speaker 1: dad just went, Yes, how's that been? It's been hard,
Speaker 1: I think for anybody, no matter what the situation is,
Speaker 1: you don't want to see your parents go to prison. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but also I think it's necessary for us to move
Speaker 1: on and move forward. So before they went, did you
Speaker 1: all not have any conversation about the circumstances and what
Speaker 1: went on? We definitely did. Um. I think that what
Speaker 1: hasn't been super public is that there is no justifying
Speaker 1: or excusing what happened because what happened was wrong. And
Speaker 1: I think every single person in my family can be like,
Speaker 1: that was messed up. That was a big mistake. But
Speaker 1: I think what's so important to me is like to
Speaker 1: learn from the mistake, not to now be shamed and
Speaker 1: punished and never given a second chance, because twenty one,
Speaker 1: I feel like I deserve a second chance to redeem myself,
Speaker 1: to show I've grown. Can you talk to them while
Speaker 1: they're in prison? I actually haven't spoken to either of them.
Speaker 1: There there's a quarantine phase just because of COVID, So
Speaker 1: I think that is the reason, but I'm not too
Speaker 1: I just haven't heard anything, so I'm just waiting. Wow, yeah,
Speaker 1: how does that make you feel. It's so I've never
Speaker 1: gone that long with that. I'm super close with my parents,
Speaker 1: especially my mom. She's like my best friends. So it's
Speaker 1: definitely been really hard not being able to talk to her.
Speaker 1: But I know she's strong, and I know it's a
Speaker 1: good reflection period. I'm trying to look at the positives
Speaker 1: and situations, you know, and I know that it's a
Speaker 1: positive that she's in there right now. She gets to
Speaker 1: really rethink everything that happened, kind of figure out know
Speaker 1: when she comes out, what she wants to do with
Speaker 1: what she's learned through all of this, and I think
Speaker 1: that hopefully will be a blessing in the end. When
Speaker 1: you first heard about your parents arrests, you were on
Speaker 1: spring break, right. I just remember getting a call and
Speaker 1: it was like, hey, liv have you talked to your mom?
Speaker 1: And I was like, no, why, And they were like, well,
Speaker 1: I'll just let you talk to her and then call
Speaker 1: me back. So I hang up the phone and I
Speaker 1: had this really weird gut feeling. I didn't know what
Speaker 1: she was talking about, but I was like, I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna search my mom's name up. Then it's everywhere. And
Speaker 1: I was sitting with a group of friends, and I
Speaker 1: knew any second everybody was going to know too, if
Speaker 1: they didn't already. And I remember just like freezing and
Speaker 1: feeling so ashamed. I went home and hid myself for
Speaker 1: probably like three or four months, and school was still
Speaker 1: in session, like I was technically after springbreak, I was
Speaker 1: going back to school, and I felt so ashamed and embarrassed.
Speaker 1: And although I didn't really understand what just had happened,
Speaker 1: because there was a lot that when I was applying,
Speaker 1: I was not fully aware of what was going on.
Speaker 1: So when I got home, I just felt so ashamed.
Speaker 1: I was like, I can't go back there. This is wrong.
Speaker 1: But I just remember feeling embarrassed, ashamed and getting the
Speaker 1: hell home. And did you go back to school or
Speaker 1: did you decide not to return? Yeah? I never went back.
Speaker 1: I was too embarrassed. Yeah I was. You know what,
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have been there in the first place, clearly,
Speaker 1: so there was no point in me trying to go back.
Speaker 1: What was some of the repercussions throughout this whole situation,
Speaker 1: Because you're a beautiful, young white woman who's been born
Speaker 1: into privilege, right, and so there would be some people
Speaker 1: that would feel like she'll be fine, Like I feel
Speaker 1: that way right, clearly, I feel like you will be fine, right,
Speaker 1: and that there are other people that wouldn't be fine. Right.
Speaker 1: That's why it's hard because I'm not trying to come
Speaker 1: across it is like all this situation, like, I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to victimize myself. I don't want pity. I don't
Speaker 1: deserve pity. We messed up. I just want a second
Speaker 1: chance to be like I recognized I messed up, and
Speaker 1: for so long I wasn't able to talk about this
Speaker 1: because of the legalities behind it. I never got to
Speaker 1: say I'm really sorry that this happened, or I really
Speaker 1: owned that this was a big mess up on everybody's part.
Speaker 1: But I think everybody feels that way in my family
Speaker 1: right now. What do you think has been the most
Speaker 1: hurtful for you emotionally in this whole situation, I felt
Speaker 1: mostly like embarrassed and ashamed of everything that's happened and
Speaker 1: things I've lost. I guess just from looking as an outsider,
Speaker 1: you could say I lost brand deals, I lost followers,
Speaker 1: or whatever it was. But I really felt most moved
Speaker 1: by the fact that we did all of this and
Speaker 1: we're so ignorant. And I feel like a huge part
Speaker 1: of having privilege is not knowing you have privilege. And
Speaker 1: so when it was happening, it didn't feel wrong. It
Speaker 1: didn't feel like that's not fair. A lot of people
Speaker 1: don't have that. I was in my own little buble,
Speaker 1: focusing about my comfortable world, but I never had to
Speaker 1: look outside of that bubble. But I also I felt
Speaker 1: very misunderstood the picture that has been painted of me.
Speaker 1: I feel like it's not who I am. I'm not
Speaker 1: this gratty girl that doesn't want to change anything. Also,
Speaker 1: I understand why people are angry, and I understand what
Speaker 1: people say hurtful things, and I would too if I
Speaker 1: wasn't in my boat. And I think I had to
Speaker 1: go through the backlash and the stuff because when you
Speaker 1: read it, you realize that there's like some truth in it.
Speaker 1: I understood that people were upset and angry, and maybe
Speaker 1: it took me a little bit longer to understand what for,
Speaker 1: But man, am I glad I did realize for ever.
Speaker 1: So what have you learned specifically when all this first
Speaker 1: happened and it became public. I remember thinking, which my
Speaker 1: thoughts are completely different than that, but I remember thinking,
Speaker 1: how are people mad about this? Like I know that
Speaker 1: sounds so silly, but in the in the bubble that
Speaker 1: I grew up and I didn't know so much outside
Speaker 1: of it, and a lot of kids in that bubble,
Speaker 1: their parents were donating to schools and doing stuff that advantage.
Speaker 1: There are so many advantages. It's not fair and it's
Speaker 1: not right, but it was happening. And so when this
Speaker 1: first came out, I was like, I don't really understand
Speaker 1: what's wrong with this, Like I'm not I'm not understand
Speaker 1: that this was because what was going on look like
Speaker 1: to you that it was just this is what happens,
Speaker 1: like everybody does. But I don't realize at the time
Speaker 1: that's privilege. I didn't I didn't put those two together.
Speaker 1: I was like, well, this is what everybody does, and
Speaker 1: my parents worked really hard and I don't understand, but
Speaker 1: that's not that's not how it should be. And unfortunately
Speaker 1: that's how it was. And I'm grateful for the situation
Speaker 1: to see that big change and that big difference in
Speaker 1: my own mind to know, like okay, Leivia. The fact
Speaker 1: that you were on YouTube and you were saying stuff
Speaker 1: like I don't want to go to school. I I
Speaker 1: just want to go party at school. I don't know
Speaker 1: how much of school I'm going to attend, but I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go in and talk to my deans and everyone
Speaker 1: and hope that I can try and balance at all.
Speaker 1: But I do want the experience of like game days, partying.
Speaker 1: I don't really care about school. Like the fact that
Speaker 1: you even could say those things just shows how fortunate
Speaker 1: you were that you don't have to worry about that,
Speaker 1: that you knew you were gonna be okay without it,
Speaker 1: And that sits with me and makes me cringe. And
Speaker 1: it's embarrassing that I ever said those types of things
Speaker 1: and only said them, but edited it, uploaded it, and
Speaker 1: then saw their response to realize it was wrong. There
Speaker 1: was no like malicious intent behind it. I was never
Speaker 1: trying to hurt anybody or say those things to brag
Speaker 1: about my life. It was just I was oblivious and
Speaker 1: just a level of unconsciousness. Yeah, completely. And it's like
Speaker 1: I sit here now and I'm like, well, how don't like,
Speaker 1: how don't you realize stuff like that that's embarrassing that
Speaker 1: that did fly over your head. But so let me
Speaker 1: ask you, if you have a clear understanding of what
Speaker 1: white privilege really is. Now, I understand that I just
Speaker 1: based off my skin color, I already had my foot
Speaker 1: in the door, and I was already ahead of everybody else.
Speaker 1: I can recognize that going forward, I do want to
Speaker 1: do stuff to change that and to help that. And
Speaker 1: I had a really cool experience a few weeks back
Speaker 1: where I went downtown in the Watts area and I
Speaker 1: got to work with some kids in this after school program.
Speaker 1: And it was kind of just shifted my whole mentality
Speaker 1: because when I was sitting with them and talking to them,
Speaker 1: and they were they all were so little, but they
Speaker 1: were so grateful for that education, that after school place
Speaker 1: that they could go away from their neighborhood to come
Speaker 1: back and have a little freedom and focus on their schoolwork.
Speaker 1: And I was watching all of them, and I was
Speaker 1: thinking about my situation and that I took all of
Speaker 1: that for granted. I didn't think that I was lucky
Speaker 1: to have that. I just expected it because that's what
Speaker 1: I grew up around. So it was a big shift
Speaker 1: in my head knowing like Okay, let's kind of start
Speaker 1: recognizing where the wrongs are and that I was looking
Speaker 1: for something to work with because I haven't been doing much,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I want to work with something and
Speaker 1: feel good and I want to give back to children
Speaker 1: who want is privileged exactly and putting time into it too.
Speaker 1: And I'm just at the beginning, and I want to
Speaker 1: continue doing stuff and finding more things to do, but
Speaker 1: not just throw money out a problem, you know, like
Speaker 1: I want to invest myself so I can start time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't want to act here like I've been doing
Speaker 1: all like I'm trying. I'm starting, but I'm starting. I'm
Speaker 1: still learning and it's taken me a minute to do.
Speaker 1: But I also think I needed to have that understanding
Speaker 1: and that mind set switched to be genuine while I'm
Speaker 1: doing stuff. And I think if I were to come
Speaker 1: on here a year ago, this would have been a
Speaker 1: completely different conversation, and so I needed to learn. So
Speaker 1: do you understand why um, different people in the community
Speaker 1: would be upset? Do you have any understanding of why
Speaker 1: I would be upset at at your being here and
Speaker 1: what you all did. I would also left to hear
Speaker 1: it from you because I feel like it's a good
Speaker 1: learning thing. I think I can understand how wrong it is.
Speaker 1: And we had the means to do something and we
Speaker 1: completely took it and ran with it, and it was
Speaker 1: something that was wrong. And I think what a lot
Speaker 1: of people not that it matters because nothing that happened was.
Speaker 1: It really can't be excused like on paper, it's bad.
Speaker 1: It's really bad. But I think what a lot of
Speaker 1: people don't know is my parents came from a place
Speaker 1: of just I love my kids. I just want to
Speaker 1: help my kids whatever is best for them. I worked
Speaker 1: my whole life to you know, provide for my family.
Speaker 1: And I think they thought it was normal. And I
Speaker 1: think that there was a college counselor involved who seemed
Speaker 1: legitimate and ended up not being legitimate. And in that community,
Speaker 1: it was it was, it was not out of the ordinary.
Speaker 1: It's embarrassing to say that I didn't know. Do you
Speaker 1: want to express why this would be upsetting for you,
Speaker 1: just so that she has understanding, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: different perspective for me. It's like, um, there is so
Speaker 1: much violent dehumanization that the black community has to go
Speaker 1: through on a daily basis, right, There is so much devastation,
Speaker 1: particularly this year with the pandemic and rething being brought
Speaker 1: to the table, just how there's so much um inequality, yeah,
Speaker 1: inequality and inequity um that when you come to the
Speaker 1: table with something like this, it's like, child, please, no,
Speaker 1: I got that. I'm exhausted. I'm exhausted with everything that
Speaker 1: we have to deal with as a community, and I
Speaker 1: just don't have the energy to put into the fact
Speaker 1: that you lost your endorsements, you know, or you're not
Speaker 1: in school right now, because at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: you're gonna be okay, because your parents are gonna go
Speaker 1: in and they're gonna do their sixty days and they're
Speaker 1: gonna pay their fine, and you guys will go on
Speaker 1: and you'll be okay and you will live your life.
Speaker 1: And there's so many of us that it is not
Speaker 1: going to be that situation. It just makes it very
Speaker 1: difficult right now for me to care this atmosphere that
Speaker 1: we are in right now. A year from now, I
Speaker 1: might feel differently, but right now, in the atmosphere that
Speaker 1: the world is in, it's very difficult for me to
Speaker 1: feel compassionate about you. I'm trying to, and it's and
Speaker 1: I shouldn't say about you, because I don't want you
Speaker 1: to take it um that personally. You know what I mean,
Speaker 1: It's not really about you. But this is what I
Speaker 1: am glad because what I am hearing from you is
Speaker 1: that there is an interest and a desire to learn
Speaker 1: and figure out where you fit in the world and
Speaker 1: what your role is to try to make a difference.
Speaker 1: Here's what I love about this converse sation makes me
Speaker 1: very hopeful in the sense of you are in a
Speaker 1: space and I have a really beautiful opportunity to come
Speaker 1: outside of that bubble and use your know how in
Speaker 1: your resources to serve. It may take you a minute
Speaker 1: to find out exactly what that niche is for you.
Speaker 1: You know what, It's going to require your willingness to
Speaker 1: do some education on your own and to really understand
Speaker 1: white privilege and what's happening in the world today. I
Speaker 1: didn't come on here to like try and win people over,
Speaker 1: and I really need people to like me. I just
Speaker 1: want to apologize for contributing to these social inequalities without
Speaker 1: maybe not even though I didn't realize that at the time,
Speaker 1: like being able to come here and recognize that I
Speaker 1: am aware, Yes, you know and that's all we can ask. Listen,
Speaker 1: we all have levels of unconsciousness, Lord knows, and then
Speaker 1: something happens in my life that just smacks me on
Speaker 1: top of the head, that has to shake me into
Speaker 1: more awareness. And that's just what life is. But the
Speaker 1: beautiful part is that when we had these experiences that
Speaker 1: shake us, we listened to the call. Right when this
Speaker 1: happened with your parents, I'm sure you were angry or
Speaker 1: were you angry? We're assuming that, Yeah, that's true. Were
Speaker 1: you angry or be honest, I wasn't angry, And I
Speaker 1: think it's because I didn't have a good understanding of
Speaker 1: what just happened. I didn't see the wrong in it,
Speaker 1: like a honestly, when it first happened, I didn't look
Speaker 1: at it and say, oh my god, like how dare
Speaker 1: we do this? I was like, why is everybody complaining?
Speaker 1: I'm confused what we did? And that's embarrassing to admit.
Speaker 1: That's embarrassing within itself that I walked around my whole
Speaker 1: twenty years of life not realizing, like, you have insane privilege.
Speaker 1: You're like the poster child of white privilege, and you
Speaker 1: had no idea. And so I think that although I've
Speaker 1: had a really strong relationship with my mom and my
Speaker 1: dad my whole life, I was definitely confused when this
Speaker 1: all came out and I went and confronted them about everything.
Speaker 1: They didn't really have much to say except like, I'm
Speaker 1: so sorry, I like, really messed up and trying to
Speaker 1: give the best to you and your sister. And they're
Speaker 1: my family and I've known them since that was out
Speaker 1: of the wood, so I know they're good people, and
Speaker 1: I know that I'm not going to judge them for
Speaker 1: a mistake they made, and although it's a big one,
Speaker 1: like they're they're going to pay the price for it.
Speaker 1: And regardless of what people say, I've seen them day
Speaker 1: in and day out and how they've received all of this,
Speaker 1: and I know that they've struggled. Why do you think
Speaker 1: it was so important for your parents to have you
Speaker 1: go to that school? I really believe my dad has
Speaker 1: attachment issues and didn't want us to leave California for starters.
Speaker 1: I think he just loves his kids, and his daughter
Speaker 1: was then one of them. Close. My mom really for
Speaker 1: most of the time when I was applying to school,
Speaker 1: was in Canada shooting a movie. It was involved in
Speaker 1: my whole childhood. But when it came to that, she like, Mossy,
Speaker 1: you handle it. I'm out, like I'm going to work now,
Speaker 1: because she she put off so much work to raise us,
Speaker 1: so she felt like she got us to an age
Speaker 1: where we can handle ourselves, and then she went back
Speaker 1: to working. So I think having us close to home
Speaker 1: was a big one. I think knowing that he knew
Speaker 1: a lot of people that went there and how all
Speaker 1: the amazing experiences he was so tunnel vision on. I
Speaker 1: just want my kids to have a good college experience,
Speaker 1: and I just want them to have an amazing education,
Speaker 1: and I know I can give that to them. Neither
Speaker 1: of them went to college, so I think it was
Speaker 1: important for them, like we didn't get to have that.
Speaker 1: I want to give it to you, but they wanted
Speaker 1: to give it to us a little too much. How
Speaker 1: has your sister doing throughout all this? She's also learned
Speaker 1: a lot, and she's kind of more laid back and relaxed,
Speaker 1: so she's like a little bit I think calmer than
Speaker 1: I am throughout a lot of this in terms of
Speaker 1: just feeling emotional, if like my parents being away or
Speaker 1: whatever it is. Although it's hard because I don't want
Speaker 1: to come across like what was me? You know. I
Speaker 1: know people go through way worse, you know, and I
Speaker 1: don't want that. I'm just speaking from my personal experience.
Speaker 1: I'm still human with feelings, you know. Yeah, but she's good.
Speaker 1: Do you feel like this has brought you too closer? Yeah?
Speaker 1: We also lived together and we have like for like
Speaker 1: read each other's next all the time because we lived
Speaker 1: together in an apartment, so got it. We're as close
Speaker 1: as it can be. How do your friends feel about
Speaker 1: what what you've been through? You have friends who are
Speaker 1: in the same same state Yeah, oblivion, ignorance, yeah yeah
Speaker 1: I do, and unawareness as you were. They all grew
Speaker 1: up similar lifestyles. None of us are intentionally trying to
Speaker 1: look the other way. You don't need to address these problems.
Speaker 1: But we weren't presented these things, and like you don't
Speaker 1: know what you don't know. I hear what you're saying.
Speaker 1: But I also recognized to this kind of stuff that
Speaker 1: I'm talking about has been on the news every day
Speaker 1: all day. I'm talking about this state of oblivion and
Speaker 1: unawareness that she and her friends are living in. It
Speaker 1: sounds like we're putting the responsibility for that on somebody
Speaker 1: else when it's not their young adults and the news
Speaker 1: is on every day, and you have some responsibility in
Speaker 1: that yourself. No, I can't argue that. Yeah, so that's
Speaker 1: my you know, No, I totally understand. But at the
Speaker 1: same time, there's some acceptance that we have to have
Speaker 1: around that and having to make room an allowance for change.
Speaker 1: I also understand where it's Why would I give you
Speaker 1: the chance now to say you understand when you've had
Speaker 1: all this time. He's been going on for generations. I
Speaker 1: get all that frustration. Absolutely. It would be a lie
Speaker 1: to say I've been knowing and working towards the quality
Speaker 1: since when I was this big. It would be a
Speaker 1: lie to say I was actively doing stuff. If I
Speaker 1: ever heard a comment, of course, I'm going to speak
Speaker 1: up and say something I know right from wrong. I
Speaker 1: just didn't think I never knew the depth behind it,
Speaker 1: because that makes sense, and I want to take the
Speaker 1: focus off to a little because I put a lot
Speaker 1: of emphasis on the just for me personally from the
Speaker 1: racial point of view, but also just the fact that
Speaker 1: the measures that were taken to get you into a
Speaker 1: college or university doesn't have anything to do with race,
Speaker 1: it's people that have worked hard to earn the right
Speaker 1: to be in that college and your parents decision to
Speaker 1: pay somebody to alter your whatever it was that they did.
Speaker 1: You understand what I'm saying. So that doesn't have anything
Speaker 1: to do with the race. That just has to do
Speaker 1: with financial privilege and entitlement. I think it was hard
Speaker 1: for me too, is I worked my ass off in
Speaker 1: high school. I wasn't slocking in high school. I don't
Speaker 1: want to discredit myself to the point where I was like,
Speaker 1: I've all this, and then also I didn't care, like
Speaker 1: I really did care. I was always a very involved student.
Speaker 1: I think that I put a lot of trust into
Speaker 1: a person that claimed their profession was college counseling, and
Speaker 1: it led me in a wrong direction. And it's not
Speaker 1: to shift blame, but it's just to explain, like I
Speaker 1: wasn't aware of what was going on. I did work hard,
Speaker 1: and when this did come out, I was a little
Speaker 1: confused when I saw stuff about what I had written
Speaker 1: on my application, and I remember writing on my application
Speaker 1: about my YouTube channel and vidcom and there were two
Speaker 1: very different things, you know, So there was a lot
Speaker 1: of it that I was like WHOA. And I'm sitting
Speaker 1: you know, reading things online, and I'm like, if only
Speaker 1: people knew how much, how how bad I feel that
Speaker 1: this happened. I think I want people to understand that
Speaker 1: I've made a million mistakes, and this one, I think
Speaker 1: on you know, my family's part, whatever, it was a
Speaker 1: really big one. But I just want people to know
Speaker 1: they were just in their heads. It was like everybody
Speaker 1: has a college counselor, and I'm just gonna donate to
Speaker 1: a school like all my friends did with their kids.
Speaker 1: And and I think what's crazier is that how so
Speaker 1: many people in that in our area, like don't recognize
Speaker 1: that it's wrong. I think, although it took a crazy
Speaker 1: experience for me and my family to realize that, I'm
Speaker 1: happy that we've do you know, like that will never
Speaker 1: happen when I have kids. That will never happen. I
Speaker 1: just hope that people can see that. I just want
Speaker 1: to move forward. And I totally totally understand if people
Speaker 1: aren't ready to jump on board with me. But I'm
Speaker 1: here because I want to leave it on the table.
Speaker 1: I don't want to keep dragging this throughout my life.
Speaker 1: I often think if every single person like you reflect
Speaker 1: on the biggest mistake you ever made to then have
Speaker 1: that be so public, but didn't make it much easier.
Speaker 1: You know, when I was on YouTube, it was so
Speaker 1: we'll just come along with my world, like see where
Speaker 1: I'm at, Let's just go for my journey and I
Speaker 1: now and I go back. I just want to make
Speaker 1: it very clear and very where, like, oh, there are
Speaker 1: big problems going on in the world that are outside
Speaker 1: my bubble, and I'm so comfortable that I don't have
Speaker 1: to go outside of it. So it's making that change
Speaker 1: of like, yeah, you could sit where you are and
Speaker 1: wouldn't affect you, But how much better off a person
Speaker 1: would you be if you used your blessings to help
Speaker 1: somebody else. What I will say is that I'm really
Speaker 1: happy that you were breaking those patterns and so you
Speaker 1: know you come into the table and also just talking
Speaker 1: about your new awareness. That brings me a lot of joy.
Speaker 1: It really does, because you're a brave girl. I don't
Speaker 1: know too many young women in your position that will
Speaker 1: come and sit with the three of us. Thanks for
Speaker 1: having The wrath of dam is no joke, right, but
Speaker 1: let me tell you just feel that way. Let me
Speaker 1: tell you the truth of the matter is you don't
Speaker 1: have to do Yeah, yeah, you really don't. You don't
Speaker 1: because the fact of the matter is you could just
Speaker 1: keep on keeping You could just keep keeping on, and
Speaker 1: you like that's the problem, right, but keeping on keeping on.
Speaker 1: I think what was important was for me to come
Speaker 1: here and say I'm sorry, I acknowledge what was wrong.
Speaker 1: And I wasn't able to say that for so long,
Speaker 1: so I think people almost thought, oh, she must not care,
Speaker 1: that must have not affected her. And she wasn't moved
Speaker 1: by that. And I took my privilege and all my
Speaker 1: bless things for granted and I never thought anything of it.
Speaker 1: And that's what really rocked me. I was like, this
Speaker 1: is wrong. You need to talk about this. You need
Speaker 1: to do it publicly because the situation was public, and
Speaker 1: then you need to move forward and do better. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's all we can ask. When we know better, we
Speaker 1: do better. When that goes across the board, the Lord knows.
Speaker 1: I'm learning every day to just do better. Life lessons.
Speaker 1: That's it. Life unfolds. We learn, keep moving and keep moving.
Speaker 1: Thanks guys. My heart was like this meeting, like, okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: I've never done an interview before. I don't think I
Speaker 1: think this is like my first interview. I was like,
Speaker 1: I guess I'm going on Red Table. I'm just going, God, yeah,
Speaker 1: you did well. Now you know, if game is saying
Speaker 1: you did well, then you know, trying to assess things
Speaker 1: to say right now because we've been talking deep for
Speaker 1: so long. But I love the color of your suit.
Speaker 1: I was sitting over and I just was like, gamped.
Speaker 1: Also because it's not about where, but that's yeah, when
Speaker 1: you walked in, I'm like, oh, right, So you don't
Speaker 1: even want me to be mad at I definitely don't
Speaker 1: want you to be mad at me here. I think
Speaker 1: it's not it's the situation. To join the Red Table
Speaker 1: Talk family and become a part of the conversation. Follow
Speaker 1: us at facebook dot com slash red table Talk. Thanks
Speaker 1: for listening to this episode of Red Table Talk podcast
Speaker 1: produced by Facebook Watch, Westbrook Audio, and I Heart Radio.