Speaker 1: Find Down with Dandy Kramer and Michael Coffin and I'm
Speaker 1: a radio podcast.
Speaker 2: And we're back again.
Speaker 3: I think it's always I never know what to say
Speaker 3: when we hey, good, I never know what to say.
Speaker 3: Maybe with the intro line should maybe we should.
Speaker 2: Have people emailing on what we should say every the
Speaker 2: start of every show, like an like an entrance, like
Speaker 2: good morning America.
Speaker 3: But it's I don't know what Hey, jack ass, how
Speaker 3: you doing Happy Monday?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 3: Is it just happy Monday? I mean you think?
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, sure, sounds like somebody has a case
Speaker 2: of the Monday. You know. It's off of space Honey,
Speaker 2: Come on, I don't watch.
Speaker 3: That was the I'm like, don't get that humor, you know.
Speaker 2: Before we got show. It's funny. Jana was calling into
Speaker 2: the room where we podcast at home, and she was like.
Speaker 3: Joy Chase, anyway, Mike, And it's so I cannot get
Speaker 3: their names.
Speaker 2: It's so funny because I used to give my parents
Speaker 2: so much crap for always doing that with me and
Speaker 2: my sister and my brother, and my dad would even
Speaker 2: even call me like his brother, his brother's name, like
Speaker 2: my uncles. He'd be like Paul Tara, Jack Mike, I'm like,
Speaker 2: you're looking at me. How do you not say my name?
Speaker 3: I literally called Jolly Waffles today after I called her Jason.
Speaker 2: She's But what's funny is I've even had that moment
Speaker 2: at times where yeah, I'm like Jack, Jase, Jolie, and
Speaker 2: it's just so hard.
Speaker 3: There's so many games.
Speaker 1: You're always why is it so hard? And you're not
Speaker 1: just like me, like I'm just thinking about myself, but
Speaker 1: like you're thinking about every once you got everyone's name,
Speaker 1: you know, is.
Speaker 3: That what it is? So I know, I don't think
Speaker 3: it's such a good topic because why is it that?
Speaker 3: Because truly, I was like, Waffles, Joline's.
Speaker 1: Going a million hours a minute, a million miles a minute, because.
Speaker 2: We have four mouths defeat, we have four little codependents,
Speaker 2: little dependence Chance, Waffles, Jolie, Jace.
Speaker 1: I guess true.
Speaker 3: But I've never called I've never called one of the
Speaker 3: kids your name. I've usually called I've called, I've called
Speaker 3: Jase Jolie.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like that's easy. With the Jay's, you're
Speaker 1: just kind of like throwing a name out there and
Speaker 1: hoping it stick.
Speaker 3: But I haven't been like, hey, Mike, why is it
Speaker 3: why is it the kid's name that we get confused with.
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, because you're saying the same things
Speaker 1: to them.
Speaker 2: Mark, you do that? Have you ever?
Speaker 4: Definitely do that? And I'm trying to do some research
Speaker 4: as to why we do that right.
Speaker 1: Now, because you're saying the same You're saying, like, Megan,
Speaker 1: pick up your clothes, what's another M name? Why can't
Speaker 1: I think of another M name?
Speaker 4: But it doesn't matter this it's about keeping You keep
Speaker 4: your children's name kind of in the same section of
Speaker 4: your brain, so when you say it wrong, like when
Speaker 4: you're going for your son, you're more likely to say
Speaker 4: your daughter's name than a different male in your life
Speaker 4: because they're kind of stored in the same party.
Speaker 1: And you mark at them.
Speaker 3: It's interesting.
Speaker 2: It's like you're reaching in your the same pocket. You
Speaker 2: don't know you're reaching for gum, but you grab a coin.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sure, you like that.
Speaker 2: I just can't remember that.
Speaker 3: We love your luck in America.
Speaker 2: Mark, and I love it.
Speaker 4: You're absolutely I'm still like.
Speaker 3: You're reaching for gud, but I kind of get that
Speaker 3: it's in the same pockets.
Speaker 2: It's in the same pocket of your.
Speaker 4: Brain, So I do understand times you can even take
Speaker 4: a pet's name by accident, because it's kind of the
Speaker 4: same sort of maternal love that you feel for them,
Speaker 4: paternal love my dogs.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Sophie, Sophie.
Speaker 2: And that's so interesting. That makes sense.
Speaker 3: Yeah, thanks for that. It does make sense. I'm not
Speaker 3: losing my mind because I really truly thought I was.
Speaker 1: No, you're not. Don't worry. You got a beautiful house.
Speaker 1: Your house is like all decorated and.
Speaker 3: Cute, and we're so fastive over here, so ready for Christmas.
Speaker 2: It was like November first we had. Even though we
Speaker 2: celebrate Thanksgiving, we just kind of go from Halloween straight
Speaker 2: to Christmas.
Speaker 1: It's not going to be a popular opinion, but I
Speaker 1: do not like Thanksgiving. I don't care for the food.
Speaker 1: I didn't. I just not into it, I know.
Speaker 3: I So you didn't have a good Thanksgiving?
Speaker 1: Then, oh no, like it's always great, but I just
Speaker 1: like my countdown is it goes countdown to birthday, so
Speaker 1: I just could care less.
Speaker 3: So what did so? What did you eat then? For things?
Speaker 1: Well, I always just have like turkey, gravy and bread.
Speaker 1: I'm just like not into it, you know, I don't
Speaker 1: know why. I don't ask I don't bake anything. I
Speaker 1: don't cook anything. Maybe that's why I just love Christmas
Speaker 1: so much. But literally I've been listening to Christmas music
Speaker 1: for a month, which actually I'm a questioned, like really,
Speaker 1: like I'm actually serious, wouldn't like I need Christmas music
Speaker 1: from you?
Speaker 5: Me?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Like I really do?
Speaker 3: I actually have one out? Oh I'm doing an album
Speaker 3: next year.
Speaker 1: Spoiler alert, Yay, I'm doing I'm doing a Christmas album.
Speaker 1: I know because literally obviously coming out of I'm just
Speaker 1: listening and it was like Laura and Lena and like
Speaker 1: George and then like Jesse Deck, I'm like, okay, any Jana,
Speaker 1: like I need like Janet.
Speaker 3: Well, there is one that I did with Straight No Chaser. Well,
Speaker 3: I guess what we were going to talk about this
Speaker 3: next week, but since you brought it up, I think
Speaker 3: we should do it. Sorry, okay, oops, so no, that's okay.
Speaker 3: I just since we're early on Chris was good. But
Speaker 3: I did do a song with Straight No Chaser and
Speaker 3: it features me on there do you guys want to
Speaker 3: hear it? No, I had no idea.
Speaker 6: It's like I'm so excited, ready go.
Speaker 5: In and hang down.
Speaker 3: So that's it. So Straight No chaser, there we go, guys.
Speaker 2: Spotify right now.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm excited.
Speaker 3: I have another one, but it never it's not on Spotify.
Speaker 1: Well, like, how does that like?
Speaker 7: When? Where?
Speaker 3: How?
Speaker 1: When?
Speaker 3: Like? I need that? What that song? That song's on Spotify?
Speaker 3: You just go straight, chaser, Jan Grammar, That's yeah, it's
Speaker 3: on Spotify right now, people. And then I did one
Speaker 3: with Todd chrisly too, so look up his album Todd.
Speaker 3: But so, Michael, the other day we were talking about
Speaker 3: you look at wait on a second, I mean not
Speaker 3: to like a Christmas memory sore we go and Todd
Speaker 3: sings on this too.
Speaker 1: Oh I'm so there you go, you asking you shall
Speaker 1: receipts I just received and I need like one hundred
Speaker 1: more of those because that was glorious.
Speaker 3: But no, Michael, we were going to bring this up
Speaker 3: next week for next week's podcast, but he was like, Hey,
Speaker 3: what are your favorite Christmas songs?
Speaker 2: You're top three, three to five Christmas.
Speaker 3: So I've been making my list, so I feel like
Speaker 3: we should play them, Michael. Why don't you play well
Speaker 3: our number one.
Speaker 2: We don't have to play them.
Speaker 3: Why it's so good, Let's play one of them? You
Speaker 3: want me to sing yeah.
Speaker 1: Better, I'm not.
Speaker 3: Oh really, can you not play those things on there?
Speaker 4: You can play a certain amount a few seconds, I
Speaker 4: think is fine. Like what you just did is okay.
Speaker 4: And plus it's over your phone, which adds another gray
Speaker 4: area to it. But it's weird. Playing music on podcasts
Speaker 4: is weird, which is why you podcast.
Speaker 3: Okay, well, here we go list you didn't listen to
Speaker 3: a couple of weeks ago podcast.
Speaker 1: Then do we go down the music lane?
Speaker 2: I heard the whole thing, all right, So I'll say
Speaker 2: like my top probably three individual Christmas songs, okay, in
Speaker 2: no particular order. Okay, uh, Little Drummer Boy by Pentatonics,
Speaker 2: Oh we're doing okay. That song is so good by them,
Speaker 2: their version of it pretty much anything.
Speaker 3: Michael will blay, but he's like King of Christmas.
Speaker 2: Have yourself from Erily Christmas or I'll be home for
Speaker 2: Christmas Michael bou Bley. And then of course, my boy,
Speaker 2: hold on, I'm gonna play a.
Speaker 3: Second every We're gonna give you one second, five seconds
Speaker 3: smart just clo second five seconds of it.
Speaker 1: Get to the good part.
Speaker 3: Chris Brown, you know my boy, Chris Brees, Chris Christmas Christmas.
Speaker 2: It's so good.
Speaker 1: That's funny.
Speaker 2: So yeah, like my top three.
Speaker 1: Gret Sky okay, so mine. This has always been a
Speaker 1: favorite song, but I listened to it like a month ago.
Speaker 1: Laura and Elena's version of Holy Night. Oh literally no
Speaker 1: no no, no, no, no no no, like oh it
Speaker 1: was she brings him like a choir s at the end,
Speaker 1: it was I'm not going to sing it, but the
Speaker 1: part where you go sing it coas and you really
Speaker 1: draw out the fall.
Speaker 3: I no, yes, you can, you know, It's like, okay,
Speaker 3: do it? No no.
Speaker 1: I love that one. And then I like the one
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to sing it because I don't know
Speaker 1: the name, but I'm not gonna sing it. I think
Speaker 1: it's a Mariah Carey one, but I don't care who
Speaker 1: sings it. I love every Chris that I like that one,
Speaker 1: but it's not that one. It's the one where they
Speaker 1: goes this sing in deck the hole.
Speaker 4: Christmas Chris is maybe please come Home.
Speaker 1: I love that one because I love like every version
Speaker 1: of any and then she goes, I love.
Speaker 4: That and that's originally Darling in Love. But you too
Speaker 4: had a big hit.
Speaker 7: With this one.
Speaker 1: I love that one. I love that one and then
Speaker 1: I really like, oh, oh my god, how can I
Speaker 1: forget rocking around the Christmas Tree? Like, no, that's a
Speaker 1: good Wenesday you will get when you're here. I love
Speaker 1: that bar is normally Okay, there you go.
Speaker 3: But yeah, so Tennessee Christmas by Amy Grant, it's so good,
Speaker 3: have yourself and Merrily Christmas by Sam Smith incredible, he's
Speaker 3: so good. Hallelujah by Pentatonic?
Speaker 4: Is that a Christmas?
Speaker 3: Hellaliah?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I just love that talking.
Speaker 3: It's a good it gives giving you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to choose that. Okay, that's a Christmas,
Speaker 1: isn't it?
Speaker 3: I mean yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, the broke again.
Speaker 4: Huh yeah, there was a secret chord that David played
Speaker 4: and it please the Lord?
Speaker 1: No, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know that that's Christmas
Speaker 1: r it is.
Speaker 3: It's on the Christmas Spotify album.
Speaker 2: I think, Yeah, it's been used a lot of different ways,
Speaker 2: but when it's played at Christmas, it's definitely.
Speaker 3: I love that song. And then are you ready for this?
Speaker 3: Ariana Grande?
Speaker 6: This next?
Speaker 3: That's a jam. That's the one we were talking about
Speaker 3: that night that I couldn't find. But then that and
Speaker 3: then ninety eight degrees Christmas Silent Night breaks my heart. Lisa,
Speaker 3: I love out there knows what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: I just think maybe it's like the spirituality of it.
Speaker 1: I just love Christmas music, and I just like when people.
Speaker 2: See it, it just makes me like, oh, we just
Speaker 2: played around the household day now, all day long.
Speaker 3: And it's been happening since like the second we November
Speaker 3: actually the first, No, it was the day after Halloween
Speaker 3: is when I started. Sorry, but it's just Mark, do
Speaker 3: you do you have a fave?
Speaker 4: I've got it all ready to go obviously not Halloween.
Speaker 4: Breaking it into three categories. One is uh contemporary, oh
Speaker 4: love it, one is traditional, and one is original.
Speaker 1: You tell them.
Speaker 4: My favorite contemporary Christmas song is Happy Christmas.
Speaker 1: John Lennon, Oh, interesting, so this.
Speaker 4: Is Christmas that one?
Speaker 2: You've heard it?
Speaker 3: Yes, a good one.
Speaker 2: Actually said that the other day, Mark, and I wanted
Speaker 2: to add that to my top.
Speaker 4: It's all a peace of love and it's it was
Speaker 4: relevant then and it's sadly still relevant.
Speaker 2: Great great song.
Speaker 4: I'm helping war is over twenty twenty. My favorite traditional
Speaker 4: is a Holy Night, which Sarah mentioned that one. There's
Speaker 4: that no who I'm not going to do it Mariah
Speaker 4: and it can be a church, it could be anywhere.
Speaker 3: Because that's wait, that was the ninety degree one. It's
Speaker 3: not Saturday Night Holy Night. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4: Yep, there's oh no, dear goosebumps every single time, and
Speaker 4: then original I figure, do you know One Republic's Christmas
Speaker 4: Without You? That's a beautiful song.
Speaker 2: Oh I know, really One Republic.
Speaker 4: One Republic has a great It was on one of
Speaker 4: the very special Christmas albums. It's really good. So I
Speaker 4: recommend that check that out Spots Without You, and I'll
Speaker 4: throw in there just because of the country vibe. The
Speaker 4: piano at the beginning of where are You Christmas? Makes me,
Speaker 4: oh my god.
Speaker 1: I listened to that last night from him the Great Hill.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 1: Are You?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah?
Speaker 4: It is so.
Speaker 1: Incredible, so sad so Christmas music?
Speaker 3: Why is it so sad?
Speaker 1: Hold on?
Speaker 3: I got then there's like santas So it's great that.
Speaker 4: I just love that this holiday has its own genre
Speaker 4: of music like no other holiday can claim that.
Speaker 5: Bud Yeah, oh man, well my favorite is probably my
Speaker 5: only wish this year by Britney Spears Sancho You why
Speaker 5: didn't I say that?
Speaker 3: I have been so good this year.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that is a jam good for Christmas?
Speaker 3: That one?
Speaker 4: That's what?
Speaker 5: Then I love a Winter Wonderland. That's a favorite of mine.
Speaker 5: Scotty McCurry's version.
Speaker 1: Is is when I block all of these what am
Speaker 1: I doing? Picking three?
Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah, because you could say it about like every
Speaker 2: Christmas song They're all good.
Speaker 3: But seriously, to your point, Mark, I mean to have
Speaker 3: its own genre. Yeah, music is so awesome. I what
Speaker 3: if you met someone that said they didn't like Christmas music?
Speaker 3: Can they? Can you like trust that person?
Speaker 1: I wouldn't.
Speaker 3: Sorry, they probably don't like it for a sentimental maybe, Yeah,
Speaker 3: for like a traumatic reason. That's true.
Speaker 4: You have to be understanding that's true. Like d Dean Ungler. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I love Deanungler from The Help I Second dating. He
Speaker 4: hates holidays, he hates Christmas. But I get he's got
Speaker 4: some very negative It brings him back to family, it
Speaker 4: brings back to his mom who he lost at a
Speaker 4: young age. The messages so much so I respect that
Speaker 4: and I.
Speaker 1: Empathize with you well, and I feel like it's not
Speaker 1: that they hate holidays. Maybe they hate.
Speaker 3: One or you know, holidays are lonely and when you
Speaker 3: don't have your family or a loved one. That's what's
Speaker 3: I mean? What do they say? You know, that's when
Speaker 3: a lot of deaths happened too, because people are depressed.
Speaker 1: Well, and you have to listen.
Speaker 3: You don't have to play this.
Speaker 1: We got to listen to this. Lauren a Landam part Okay,
Speaker 1: is this the climax of the song?
Speaker 3: It's so good?
Speaker 1: Some in choir coming in.
Speaker 3: Oh wow, Yeah, she's incredible. I was a little emotional.
Speaker 1: Not gonna lie.
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Speaker 3: I just say something frozen two not appropriate?
Speaker 1: WHOA really? That just took me by a wild surprise.
Speaker 3: That's not age appropriate that I almost wanted to leave.
Speaker 1: Please tell, please tell, not app appropriate for who?
Speaker 3: Well, it's a lot of comments have been made about it.
Speaker 3: What's I went, this is a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 3: I think it's Oh, Mark, we pulled that up situating.
Speaker 4: I would think, what is it?
Speaker 3: I don't know, I don't know, can't lasting.
Speaker 1: Guidence PG is correct?
Speaker 3: But what age? Did they technically say PG is four?
Speaker 2: Oh they don't.
Speaker 3: Yeah, right, I think, Well, I thought parentally, this was
Speaker 3: a couple of weeks ago. Obviously I saw the movie,
Speaker 3: and we haven't talked about it. I forgot about it.
Speaker 4: Well, it's good to let me say it before any
Speaker 4: spoilers come out.
Speaker 3: Well, it's been out that people are upset.
Speaker 1: Oh really, I mean, I don't know any of this,
Speaker 1: so please like EDU.
Speaker 3: Came basically, Disney said, this is for their ten year
Speaker 3: old princesses, And I'm like, you should have warned the
Speaker 3: four year old princesses that are seeing this movie. And
Speaker 3: you hear death and dead about twenty times in the movie.
Speaker 4: In the original Frozen, the parents.
Speaker 3: Die right kind of, but they didn't.
Speaker 2: They didn't.
Speaker 3: Lost at Sea, Lost at Sea, Well, they said the
Speaker 3: word dead and death at least ten times, and there
Speaker 3: was a few people that died and said they died.
Speaker 3: And maybe I'm just being overly uh sensitive to that,
Speaker 3: but I did not. I was really upset that we
Speaker 3: didn't have any warnings about how because there was there
Speaker 3: was people close in that story that died, and my
Speaker 3: child was sad and scared and asking about death.
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry, I was kind of okay, I get it,
Speaker 1: so like okay.
Speaker 3: And they kept they were making jokes about that person died,
Speaker 3: that person's gonna be dead. That's not funny to joke about.
Speaker 3: And I did the movie was there was a joke
Speaker 3: about death, and I was just like, do they just
Speaker 3: say that.
Speaker 4: Kids? But we're going to see this over Christmas with
Speaker 4: my niece who's four. You think this is problem now?
Speaker 3: I think it is to be cool. I mean, but again,
Speaker 3: I'm I'm a very I'm not a helicopter parent. I'm
Speaker 3: in the middle. I just don't think it's I don't
Speaker 3: like it. Like Jolie's coming off from school, she's just
Speaker 3: learned this war and she's like, this car is dead.
Speaker 3: It's I'm like Jolie, please don't say that, baby, like
Speaker 3: you don't do you know what that means? We can,
Speaker 3: you know, but she doesn't understand. She thinks dead is
Speaker 3: funny and when they're joking about death and Frozen two,
Speaker 3: that's not funny.
Speaker 1: What is it like pertain to like?
Speaker 3: And there's also like it was a very sad movie.
Speaker 3: There was a few people that died.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm I'm out, so I don't need to be
Speaker 1: crying in a children's film.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was very like the energy. It was just tuvvy.
Speaker 3: Not only was it scary at certain parts, like she
Speaker 3: had to come sit in my chair, and she's not
Speaker 3: a scared kid, like she doesn't get scared easily, but
Speaker 3: not only was it, it was just I was like, wow,
Speaker 3: this is this is a lie for almost four the
Speaker 3: first one.
Speaker 2: So everybody did. Even when I asked Jolie when Jana
Speaker 2: and Jolie got home from the movie, which I was very.
Speaker 3: It was a girl's thing.
Speaker 2: I was very jealous that she had the girls went.
Speaker 2: But I asked Jolie, how's the movie? Was it amazing?
Speaker 2: She was like, oh, it was scary. I think that
Speaker 2: was the first thing that she said, so it was scary. Yeah.
Speaker 3: And then me and my girlfriend Nicole and I were
Speaker 3: talking about the and Dre, who came to the movie
Speaker 3: with us. We talked afterwards because I was there with
Speaker 3: you know, my other two girlfriends who have older kids,
Speaker 3: and I know they're not as you know, they probably
Speaker 3: weren't as sensitive to that. I know they weren't, so
Speaker 3: I probably wouldn't have gotten that same reaction are They
Speaker 3: probably like, oh, whatever, it's a kid thing. But I
Speaker 3: just it really bothered me. And so I called Dre
Speaker 3: and I was like, were you because we had kids
Speaker 3: are on the same age. I was like, did that
Speaker 3: upset you at all? And She's like, yes, just like
Speaker 3: that was so depressing.
Speaker 1: I mean, this might be a weird question, but like
Speaker 1: what age do you kids go to movies?
Speaker 3: I'm just like, but I mean there's nothing they don't
Speaker 3: joke about death or saying dead and right and any
Speaker 3: other films that might.
Speaker 1: I don't Aladdin, but I don't have a kid, so
Speaker 1: I don't like, I wouldn't be paying attention to that.
Speaker 1: So I don't know, but huh.
Speaker 4: Mean possible to separated? Can you tell me is it
Speaker 4: a good movie if you didn't have if you didn't
Speaker 4: go with your daughter and you went, would you have
Speaker 4: enjoyed it?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Really, Like I watched the first one all the time
Speaker 1: by myself.
Speaker 3: It's because it was so mark it was. It was
Speaker 3: It's just the only parts were good were all off.
Speaker 1: Oh he's the best.
Speaker 3: This is just again my personal pay So I you know, well,
Speaker 3: people people said they loved it, like was It's just.
Speaker 1: What was the point of this film? Like why was
Speaker 1: it so sad? Like is there like a I mean.
Speaker 3: I can't even tell you because it's the major spoilers people,
Speaker 3: I haven't seen the ideot.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so Mike does not want to be spoiled.
Speaker 3: No, I don't, so I just for me personally, it
Speaker 3: wasn't a very uplifting film.
Speaker 1: Weird, especially like around Christmas and like yeah huh, and all.
Speaker 2: The anticipations from like six years ago.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was gonna say, it's just it's older, so
Speaker 3: I don't know. I would just be careful. And there
Speaker 3: was a few scary parts for I think, I think
Speaker 3: a four year old. But then again, I'm the parent
Speaker 3: that got upset when I saw a parent bring a
Speaker 3: four year old to see Jurassic Park and seeing a
Speaker 3: kid being eaten by like that bothered me saying that
Speaker 3: a kid was watching that. But again, I'm just.
Speaker 1: Already really scared in the Lion King when I was little.
Speaker 3: Just well, yeah, those hyenas are terrified.
Speaker 1: Well and scar really scared me, like he really scarred me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: Maybe Jilly will tell you in fifteen years. Mold Frozen
Speaker 1: two really freaked me out.
Speaker 3: Great, I've already screwed up my kid by taking her
Speaker 3: to a that's interesting.
Speaker 1: I haven't heard anything about it. I mean also, I
Speaker 1: don't really know a lot of mom friends.
Speaker 3: But I'll keep I'll keep that and maybe China we'll
Speaker 3: go see it. So yeah, I just keep it in
Speaker 3: the back of your mind. Mark, if the people that
Speaker 3: you're going with don't care about that, my sister and
Speaker 3: or what, Yeah, it's true to care about the Dean.
Speaker 4: Have a choice is obsessed with the first one.
Speaker 1: YEA, I was going to say, how do you say?
Speaker 7: No?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just sad.
Speaker 7: All right.
Speaker 2: We're very excited about our next guest doctor Are you
Speaker 2: with us?
Speaker 7: I am?
Speaker 2: Hey, how you doing? This is Mike and Jana and
Speaker 2: we also have our other co host Sarah with us,
Speaker 2: and so doctor, I'm gonna say a little bit about you,
Speaker 2: and then I'm going to have you give like your
Speaker 2: elevator pits to our listeners. So you're trained in uh
Speaker 2: psychiatry and practicing, and you also practice in emergency medicine,
Speaker 2: and you're major proponent of the power of routine and
Speaker 2: currently working on a book called Routineology, Discovering the Art
Speaker 2: and Science of Routine. So explain to our listeners what
Speaker 2: that all means.
Speaker 7: Well, you know, in today's time, which is a little
Speaker 7: bit disruptive in the world, you know, it seems that
Speaker 7: routine became important. I decided in our studies when I
Speaker 7: started to look at longevity of people that were high
Speaker 7: performers and even care of the young, that it seemed
Speaker 7: that maybe doing things in a regular basis and doing
Speaker 7: things in a routine and particularly in a stable environment,
Speaker 7: we're really a very important part of our world. And
Speaker 7: as I started to look back at the physiology and
Speaker 7: the end of chronology and kind of how we're wired,
Speaker 7: I began to realize that really, for the purpose of
Speaker 7: survival and otherwise, routine is a very very important part
Speaker 7: of what we are, and so are the rituals that
Speaker 7: we performed and really the way we live.
Speaker 2: I heard something I don't remember where I read or
Speaker 2: where I heard it some years back, that it takes
Speaker 2: doing something twenty one days consecutively to become a habit.
Speaker 2: Is that true?
Speaker 7: Well, I'm not sure that there's an exact science to
Speaker 7: that twenty one days. There was a few studies done
Speaker 7: early on on mice that kind of pointed to that
Speaker 7: kind of habit. A habit is an automated behavior, an automated,
Speaker 7: automated thing that you do where you don't have to
Speaker 7: think about it, you know, just like sometimes brushing your
Speaker 7: teeth at night, or things that you do kind of regularly.
Speaker 7: Sometimes your behaviors like you scratch or something of that sort.
Speaker 7: So habits can be good or habits can be bad
Speaker 7: for you, right.
Speaker 2: So, absolutely so, with a holiday season coming up upon us,
Speaker 2: which is a very stressful time across the board for
Speaker 2: majority of.
Speaker 3: Us, and our topic of today's show, with all the
Speaker 3: music that we talked.
Speaker 2: About, what kind of things can we take into this
Speaker 2: holiday season to help destress and kind of normalize our
Speaker 2: experience and manage our expectations.
Speaker 7: Well, and thanks for thanks for that question. So one
Speaker 7: of the things about the holidays and let's talk about
Speaker 7: Thanksgiving for example, or you know Christmas, is that they're
Speaker 7: actually rituals, and these rituals have kind of developed because
Speaker 7: of routines. There's things that we do very regularly. They've
Speaker 7: become kind of part of our culture and they're kind
Speaker 7: of a moment in time where we can have something
Speaker 7: that's kind of certain, something we can depend on that
Speaker 7: we're going to be doing throughout that day. And obviously
Speaker 7: the type of routines what people do in those particular days,
Speaker 7: whether they're with family or friends or acquaintances or even
Speaker 7: on their own, become a little bit different. But that
Speaker 7: sense of regularity, that sense of doing things give us
Speaker 7: a sense of really certainty in times where today if
Speaker 7: we're just in our everyday lives, looking at outside the
Speaker 7: political world, there's a lot of the sense of instability.
Speaker 7: And what routines do and the routine and as rituals
Speaker 7: are actually built to give us a certain sense of
Speaker 7: certainty kind of come together in the sort and you know,
Speaker 7: people they can't be traumatic times, but you know, people
Speaker 7: do want to get together. People do want to feel
Speaker 7: like they belong and being able to start thinking about
Speaker 7: how does that happen or why are those Are they
Speaker 7: those people? You probably know quite a few of your
Speaker 7: own experiences where there's people that are kind of disruptive
Speaker 7: when we get together in the sort. So there's a
Speaker 7: little bit about all the back that I.
Speaker 2: Could talk to absolutely.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 2: I'm reading some here on your rundown kind of things
Speaker 2: that you preach on here, and I read one and says, creative,
Speaker 2: create a decorative sign declaring your homemade politics free zone.
Speaker 2: And I love that because I'm not. I'm not really
Speaker 2: I don't really lean anyway politically, and I kind of
Speaker 2: stay out of it for the most part. My wife
Speaker 2: Janna here is more the politician of the family.
Speaker 3: Zero, I know nothing. I just like a debate.
Speaker 2: I love to do it more than me and so.
Speaker 2: And I really contribute that doctor I to honestly my
Speaker 2: experience at holidays with my dad's side of the family.
Speaker 2: It's like politics was that one subject that created a
Speaker 2: valto environment that got everyone, you know, heightened and raised
Speaker 2: their voices. And I'm like, man, I don't if this
Speaker 2: is what they're how they're acting on politics, I don't
Speaker 2: want any part of that. I really feel like the
Speaker 2: two are connected in that sense of why I'm not interested?
Speaker 3: But isn't there something to be said though about a
Speaker 3: healthy debate?
Speaker 7: Right? Well, it's it's good, but you know, sometimes the
Speaker 7: holidays are probably maybe not the best time to debate.
Speaker 7: And it's it's kind of funny because it's like you
Speaker 7: see these red you see these little round red signs
Speaker 7: of across across to like whatever, no bozos, no smoking,
Speaker 7: you know, and probably a no politics sign or a
Speaker 7: no religion sign or probably pretty good good topics to
Speaker 7: kind of try to stay away from. And it's kind
Speaker 7: of interesting, you know, you probably you probably can guess
Speaker 7: that some of these the types of people that show up,
Speaker 7: and a lot of it is the personality types and
Speaker 7: why do people have these kinds of stresses as they
Speaker 7: get together, let's say, with family, your friends, and you know,
Speaker 7: there's a couple of little categories. You know, maybe you
Speaker 7: guys can guess a little bit at some of them.
Speaker 7: But I'll give you the first one is what I
Speaker 7: call the reverters, the people that revert back to childhood
Speaker 7: when they're together. You know, they look back at what
Speaker 7: it was like when they were a child. Their relationship,
Speaker 7: they're pecking order within the family kind of or relationships
Speaker 7: that they had with friends, and they bring up those
Speaker 7: old memories, you know, they bring up old wounds, old
Speaker 7: childhood wounds, and don't kind of recognize as you're sitting
Speaker 7: around the table that in many cases many of us
Speaker 7: have all grown up already. So reverters are kind of
Speaker 7: like one type of disruptors kind of personality because when
Speaker 7: you're putting it together, you've got to kind of know
Speaker 7: your audience a little bit, right, and if debate is
Speaker 7: part of what your routine is going to be, there's
Speaker 7: going to be a moment to debate. Maybe that's that's
Speaker 7: okay too, because the routine and the process are important,
Speaker 7: And there's a couple other types of people that are
Speaker 7: kind of disruptive. Sometimes there's what I you know, what
Speaker 7: I call sometimes relevant seekers, people who want to be heard,
Speaker 7: they want to remain relevant, and maybe people that are
Speaker 7: out of work and searching to still be heard, or
Speaker 7: someone who's retired or uncle. You know, family dynamics and
Speaker 7: some friend dynamics can be can be quite quite complex
Speaker 7: in nature. But there's people that are kind of relevant seekers.
Speaker 7: And then sometimes there's people that just have a personality
Speaker 7: that you know, I kind of call them personalizers, you know,
Speaker 7: people that you guys can give you some examples if
Speaker 7: you've had, if you've encountered, because I'd be curious to
Speaker 7: understand that like people who just need to convert you
Speaker 7: to their ideology, to their they feel so strongly about it.
Speaker 7: It gives them a lot of meaning and purpose and
Speaker 7: they want others to hear them and to join them.
Speaker 7: And they're thinking, so those you're a couple of the uh,
Speaker 7: you know, simple basic, kind of disrupted personalities that happen
Speaker 7: in families and friends when we all get together for dinner.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, and I think we all know people that fit
Speaker 2: under those categories. And doctor, I think you just single
Speaker 2: handly described my my wonderful grandfather. I think he checked
Speaker 2: all the boxes for all three God bless them. I
Speaker 2: love him and I can't wait to experience all of
Speaker 2: these personality traits this holiday season. What's before we let
Speaker 2: you go? What's something that you do just from a
Speaker 2: routine standpoint, since your whole book is kind of talking
Speaker 2: about that, What's something that you do and you're on
Speaker 2: a daily basis that kind of keeps you in your
Speaker 2: routine and keeps you you know on your on your path.
Speaker 7: Well, you know, that's the interesting thing about routine is
Speaker 7: that with your routine, if you look at the psychology
Speaker 7: and actually the physiology of it is something to builds
Speaker 7: upon itself and to get started, you just have to
Speaker 7: do do it, so to speak, just like the Nike
Speaker 7: like Nike commercial and you've heard about like just make
Speaker 7: your bed. But as you start to do any routine
Speaker 7: on a regular basis, and that's kind of my point,
Speaker 7: it's not so important necessarily the content. Not to say,
Speaker 7: content isn't important today, whether it's die, if there's sleep,
Speaker 7: or even you know, the routine of how you're going
Speaker 7: to do your Thanksgiving meal, do it and do it
Speaker 7: in a regular way. Planet have it organized, you know,
Speaker 7: awake early and begin to execute and prepare that food,
Speaker 7: plan and organize. If you're the host, I'm saying, organize
Speaker 7: your schedule.
Speaker 3: Absolutely so much.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and our listeners they can find you at your
Speaker 2: website at on hell Iskovic dot com.
Speaker 7: Correct, that's correct, and you pronounced that great. Thank you
Speaker 7: so much, yes.
Speaker 2: Sir, thank you so. Your book Routinealogy Discovering the artis
Speaker 2: and Science of Routine is coming soon, so check out
Speaker 2: his website, doctor, I thank you so much.
Speaker 8: Happy holidays.
Speaker 7: Say happy holidays to you guys.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
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Speaker 2: All make Mark, we have any emails?
Speaker 3: I just called. I just called Mark, Mike and Mike
Speaker 3: Mark Mike.
Speaker 2: The same pocket.
Speaker 3: How does a fel.
Speaker 4: Taylor Taylor's Taylor is very sweet say his first off.
Speaker 4: I wanted to say Christmas and Louisiana was awesome.
Speaker 3: I love by the way Easton, Thanks for your like
Speaker 3: play by play too, What a fun time. She's like,
Speaker 3: He's like, I wanted to know what happened? Did you
Speaker 3: guys end up together without a clipphanger? I went back
Speaker 3: to Boston.
Speaker 4: She loved that you kept everybody up on your inst
Speaker 4: of stories with the movie, and it's so funny you
Speaker 4: take your fans and listeners along with you. So that's
Speaker 4: very sweet. But she does have a question for Mike.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I understand it's just a movie and acting
Speaker 4: as Jana's job, but just seeing her acting as if
Speaker 4: she's in a relationship with another man bother you at all,
Speaker 4: especially knowing some about your insecurities. I would love to
Speaker 4: hear more about your feelings when watching the kissing scene.
Speaker 4: Especially if I saw my boyfriend kissing some guy on TV,
Speaker 4: even if it was his job, I'd be bothered. It
Speaker 4: was great seeing you in Chicago.
Speaker 2: Ah well, Taylor, thank you for coming out to Chicago
Speaker 2: and supporting us. And a great question. So honestly, it uh.
Speaker 8: Sure.
Speaker 2: The short of it is no, it doesn't bother The
Speaker 2: short of it is no, it doesn't bother me. And
Speaker 2: a big part of that is because anytime Janna goes
Speaker 2: to film something, I always come to the shoot and
Speaker 2: come on set at least and travel to wherever she's
Speaker 2: shooting at least for a week or ten days, so
Speaker 2: I'm able to get comfortable. I meet her co star,
Speaker 2: I you know, get to know the people around the set,
Speaker 2: so I'm comfortable with everything and that makes me feel
Speaker 2: a lot better. And you know, right now, with the
Speaker 2: stuff that she's been doing since we've been together has
Speaker 2: been lifetime or Hallmark, So it's a lifetime or Hallmark
Speaker 2: kind of kiss. So there are bridges that we have
Speaker 2: not crossed yet. Taylor.
Speaker 1: That's actually that good point.
Speaker 2: We can discuss when we cross them, because you know,
Speaker 2: and just I'll never want to be a reason why
Speaker 2: Jana doesn't take a job opportunity.
Speaker 1: Well, and like you kind of signed up, you know
Speaker 1: when you met her, you right.
Speaker 2: Exactly kind of sign up for it. So I knew
Speaker 2: Jannah was an actress and a great one at that.
Speaker 2: So thanks, I know she's going to have her opportunities.
Speaker 2: It's just one of those things where.
Speaker 3: I like that one show I'm auditioning for right now,
Speaker 3: it says simulated sex scenes and lots of news.
Speaker 1: It was just about first start about to say until
Speaker 1: she has her first sex scene.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that that's that's just something that you know,
Speaker 2: we will have to talk about. We'll have to talk
Speaker 2: about there be boundaries there, you know, and.
Speaker 3: And I totally get that, and you know, empathy, empathy
Speaker 3: and have empathy for you for that. I will just
Speaker 3: say from this side of things, like when I had
Speaker 3: the scenes with you know, Stephen COLLETTI and Alex and
Speaker 3: Chase were making out and rolling around a bed and
Speaker 3: I was an underwear, it's uncomfortable for us because it's
Speaker 3: like you have all these people well you always it's
Speaker 3: not I'd say, it's like it's not hot, it's not
Speaker 3: had at all, it's zero because it's literally routine. The
Speaker 3: second we were done kissing and I was on we
Speaker 3: rolled off and I'm like, hey, so what are you
Speaker 3: eating for lunch today? You know, like there's and we're
Speaker 3: on our phones. There's not there's not that through watching
Speaker 3: you again, there's crew watching. So it's just there's nothing intimate,
Speaker 3: and nobody's getting a those things right.
Speaker 2: It's one of those things that people don't know unless
Speaker 2: you're in that profession and have experienced it, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean.
Speaker 4: It's just the other side of the coin is how
Speaker 4: many actors and actors have.
Speaker 1: Developed broad and Angie all theestions.
Speaker 4: After those scenes. So you know those scenes aren't hot
Speaker 4: there's some sort of connection.
Speaker 3: Well, and that's the line. No, no, but it's not.
Speaker 3: It's not even just about those scenes. It's the line
Speaker 3: that you cross behind the scenes, behind the scenes, before
Speaker 3: the scenes. It's not because it's like you're spending so
Speaker 3: much time with this person, like a month, especially if
Speaker 3: they're in a lot of the other scenes with you,
Speaker 3: So it's about what you're doing before and after. It's
Speaker 3: not during those scenes. Really truly good point because it
Speaker 3: really truly.
Speaker 4: Okay, But okay, and I believe I do believe that,
Speaker 4: But you don't know what is in the other actors
Speaker 4: head that's bothered.
Speaker 1: What if you like something and all of a sudden
Speaker 1: you're like, hmm, that felt good.
Speaker 3: Well, but here's here's the problem though, If you have
Speaker 3: a kissing scene. Let's say, you know, week two into
Speaker 3: the movie, and you're starting to have these like feelings
Speaker 3: for the other actor and you're probably maybe anticipating that
Speaker 3: because who knows you've been cultivating these you know, feelings
Speaker 3: because you're hanging out with them twenty four to seven.
Speaker 1: Well, then you're just not a good actor because you're
Speaker 1: not acting. Think you're getting feelings.
Speaker 4: But my wife, we're in bed with another man for
Speaker 4: an acting scene, wearing little or nothing. It would drive
Speaker 4: me insane.
Speaker 3: But again, your wife isn't an actress though, well, but
Speaker 3: even if she was, like but then you wouldn't have
Speaker 3: see the shre sure.
Speaker 2: And that and that's the thing. Mark, I don't Again,
Speaker 2: if if Jana is ever in a situation like that,
Speaker 2: then it's I don't honestly, it's going to be ignorance
Speaker 2: is bliss. I don't want to see it. I don't
Speaker 2: want to know about it. I don't want to be
Speaker 2: on set that day. I just want to know.
Speaker 3: But you're going to watch it, though, No, no, and
Speaker 3: watch it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, you'll tell me. If you're in a movie
Speaker 2: and it has that, you'll say, hey, it's coming up soon.
Speaker 2: I will leave the room.
Speaker 3: Wait, so time out really fast though, because in Christmas
Speaker 3: and Louisiana, when like the kids part happened, he goes.
Speaker 1: Oh, you did the head grab, Like I.
Speaker 3: Put my hand like behind his head, and I don't
Speaker 3: think he was exciting that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The other ones that I saw were just kind
Speaker 2: of like face to face, out the mouth like kind
Speaker 2: of more of like nice. I was like they even
Speaker 2: she went in for the head gap and they did
Speaker 2: the head tilt and like each side.
Speaker 1: I was like, yo, really really funny.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So did that bother you?
Speaker 1: Not?
Speaker 2: It didn't bother me.
Speaker 3: It is surprised me, just like weird, Like I bet.
Speaker 2: I'm able to compartmentalize. And that's just because we've been
Speaker 2: together long enough and coming from my own version of
Speaker 2: entertainment world. Granted we didn't do anything like that, but
Speaker 2: I understand the demand that you have to do for
Speaker 2: your job.
Speaker 1: That's true.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And so I would never want to again get
Speaker 2: in the way of Janna pursuing her career. I wouldn't
Speaker 2: be able to live with myself.
Speaker 1: I appreciate that.
Speaker 3: But now if Michael if roles were reversed and he's like, hey,
Speaker 3: I want to be an actor, Hell, that would be
Speaker 3: very hard for me to watch him. We're gonna go
Speaker 3: with the know on that one because I've dated other
Speaker 3: actors and had had zero because I know what it
Speaker 3: is like, you know. But if he was to all
Speaker 3: of a sudden become an actor, I'd be like, uh,
Speaker 3: I would have a very hard time with that. It's
Speaker 3: something you really wanted to do.
Speaker 1: He's a Disney star.
Speaker 2: He's gonna be Tanner. Thank you, Jar great great topic, Mark,
Speaker 2: thanks for stirring that pop producer.
Speaker 4: I'm fascinated about that because we can't even imagine. Most
Speaker 4: people can't imagine like that. Amanda says, our son just
Speaker 4: turned nine months on Thanksgiving and we're trying to introduce
Speaker 4: soft table foods to him, but I am so terrified
Speaker 4: of him choking. It flares up my anxiety. What foods
Speaker 4: were Jason Joe Lee eating at nine months?
Speaker 3: Good question. I'm equally as the same, and I've cut
Speaker 3: up probably smaller than I've had to because I get nervous.
Speaker 3: But at nine months avocado, bananas, but blueberries, we gotta
Speaker 3: cut him in force.
Speaker 2: Blueberries is what I would grapes all again.
Speaker 3: Cut small, small, smashy things, so like, but I would
Speaker 3: start with avocados and bananas. That would be my Yeah,
Speaker 3: talk to your doctor obviously.
Speaker 2: Yeah, those are the easiest smushy ones that we definitely
Speaker 2: start off.
Speaker 3: With and cut him in force. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Wow, and just watch them just.
Speaker 2: I mean, especially when you first started. When we started
Speaker 2: Jay's a couple of months ago. We you know, it's
Speaker 2: not like like now we can kind of put stuff
Speaker 2: on his plate, turn our back, make something else. But
Speaker 2: when we first started him, we're sitting there watching him,
Speaker 2: helping him. M hm.
Speaker 4: So I mean my kids were like ten and seven,
Speaker 4: and my wife was like, why are you still cutting
Speaker 4: their grapes?
Speaker 7: At happened?
Speaker 4: I don't know if they broke.
Speaker 2: That much big because it used to be just have it.
Speaker 3: That's so funny.
Speaker 4: Also, a man does a follow up, well unrelated actually,
Speaker 4: but another question. Since her son was born, our sex
Speaker 4: life has fizzled out. I'm so tired. I literally favors
Speaker 4: sleep over sex, but I do miss the connection. What
Speaker 4: can we do as a couple to bring the spark back?
Speaker 2: So Jana and I just did this the other night,
Speaker 2: and it's it's something we did and it's just I
Speaker 2: just it was fun and it was connected. And we've
Speaker 2: we've played we played cards in bed.
Speaker 1: And you know, we got a huge fight out doors,
Speaker 1: all right.
Speaker 2: I know, I know, but I'm saying, but I'm saying
Speaker 2: that the moment though, like even we weren't we didn't
Speaker 2: go and sit at the poker tape and play cards.
Speaker 2: We like laid in our bed, played a game together.
Speaker 2: It was just like nice to not just to get
Speaker 2: into bed in your usual position under the covers watching TV.
Speaker 2: We were on top of the covers kind of talking,
Speaker 2: playing a game. And I think that invites because the
Speaker 2: bedroom has almost like an expectation to it. Maybe sometimes
Speaker 2: when you walk in and you guys go to bed
Speaker 2: together where it's almost like, hey, use the bedroom for
Speaker 2: something else, use it for something fun, as like a
Speaker 2: neutral ground pressure instead of pressure, and then just you
Speaker 2: might automatic at least in that moment, I felt relaxed,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. So I don't know, just
Speaker 2: something to try either.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I like that, but I think that's a good
Speaker 3: a good thing. And then I also just say not
Speaker 3: having expectations, like hey, I just we just cuddle with
Speaker 3: me tonight because they always say like to get back,
Speaker 3: and when we did Tantra therapy, it was just like
Speaker 3: just holding and with the excitation of not having sex.
Speaker 3: And usually when you're holding someone and you say you're
Speaker 3: not gonna have sex, you end up really wanting to. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 3: and so excited. We only have one more week together
Speaker 3: before Christmas.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm so excited.
Speaker 3: I think we need to end this episode with Sarah
Speaker 3: taking us out on a song.
Speaker 1: No, I agree, Oh okay, they get to think what
Speaker 1: I know? Okay, I don't know, Easton, can you sing
Speaker 1: with me? Well's do the breath. I don't know all
Speaker 1: the lyrics, so it'll you'll okay.
Speaker 3: Santa, can you hear me?
Speaker 1: I have been so good this year, and all.
Speaker 3: I want is one thing you guys know you're saying
Speaker 3: along right now?
Speaker 1: I don't know, hold on, only need my Christmas tree?
Speaker 3: All right, Mark, that's the cutestuff.
Speaker 2: Because all right, yeah, I don't remember.
Speaker 1: I love that song though, because all I wanted I
Speaker 1: can't think of it