Speaker 1: Guess what decision we're about to make a horrible decisions.
Speaker 1: Hey guys, welcome to yet another episode of horrible decisions.
Speaker 1: I'm your girl, man to be a full corp. Pumps okay,
Speaker 1: pet to sall you baby? Yes, she big aka debt
Speaker 1: bitch and Hi, I'm wheezy. You're getting their feet. They're
Speaker 1: free on YouTube today. Um, we have very special guest.
Speaker 1: Very special. This is our first couple of foursome, isn't no,
Speaker 1: we don't have some couples of the year they want to.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'd be wanting to funk a lot of people.
Speaker 1: I just don't say it on the mic. You never
Speaker 1: said it to me before. Well, first off, both of
Speaker 1: y'all come off very innocent. And I really don't like
Speaker 1: to feel like I'm corrupting people because I don't want
Speaker 1: to feel like I'm corrupting people. I like dealing with
Speaker 1: like just bitches that spew Ho you don't white? Okay,
Speaker 1: that's good. You speel sex like like like Classy said,
Speaker 1: like Classy said, like, I don't know if you would
Speaker 1: spit in my mouth if I asked you to, if
Speaker 1: you asked me, if she asked me to A thousand percent.
Speaker 1: It may not come natural to me, those he instincts
Speaker 1: are correct, but Ida a team player in the bedroom,
Speaker 1: so I would do as you ask, I love, And
Speaker 1: you know what, y'all probably already got the voice if
Speaker 1: you haven't yet. We are joined by YouTuber extraordinary, sexologist,
Speaker 1: sexpert and everything great Shan Bootist and her man, and
Speaker 1: we are joined by someone which, ironically, the last time
Speaker 1: we had you on Shan, y'all weren't yet married, right,
Speaker 1: but you were discussing married. I think you were engaged. No,
Speaker 1: I think she was engaged. But and we talked about
Speaker 1: it being her booty partner like it was her buddy,
Speaker 1: her booty partner. Uh so you actually beat beat all
Speaker 1: the odds and ended up marrying your booty call lover Jared,
Speaker 1: who was here, who was also a podcast the Guys
Speaker 1: with some really fine co host. Okay, I just want
Speaker 1: to keep shot, sorry girl, love good. Oh yeah, go ahead,
Speaker 1: tell them where they could find you enjoy the podcast
Speaker 1: anywhere that you stream your favorite podcast. And he's not
Speaker 1: telling you to enjoy it. That's the name, So don't
Speaker 1: enjoy it. Do you know where I played your song
Speaker 1: like whole but time? Really? Yeah? You are learning your
Speaker 1: romantic I can tell him. So he's also an artist. Guys,
Speaker 1: you know I swear. And then I said I don't
Speaker 1: remember where I played it, and this girl was like,
Speaker 1: is that Sham's man? I was like, damn, you can't play.
Speaker 1: I loved the video. I'd love that you were in it.
Speaker 1: You guys are honestly the definition to me of support.
Speaker 1: You are just the most loving, supportive, arms wide open
Speaker 1: women that I have ever met before. It's not just
Speaker 1: our brand. Arms and legs are open people have ever
Speaker 1: met before. I think that I don't know if you
Speaker 1: get the credit you deserve for being such beautiful. I
Speaker 1: want to call you like wounds no, because like you
Speaker 1: guys house greatness, and like you give back to others
Speaker 1: in such nourishing and enriching ways. I just never felt
Speaker 1: an ounce of hate from you ever. I think it's
Speaker 1: because we probably feel it from you. To My first
Speaker 1: time meeting shan Um was at her house and I
Speaker 1: was like having a really weird like moment in time
Speaker 1: with love and like, I just felt like you were
Speaker 1: very sincere. And I think just a lot of people
Speaker 1: have done a lot of inter views with people and
Speaker 1: they're just like ready to kick you out, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. It is not like I had to stay.
Speaker 1: But you know, when someone can feel that you're hurting
Speaker 1: a little bit. I think that good people. It's not
Speaker 1: easy to tell, you know what I mean. I think
Speaker 1: that's why you have so many fans. But we all
Speaker 1: look the same and do the same thing. No, it's
Speaker 1: have agreed a very different you know how. I know
Speaker 1: that's not true because you even said we don't get
Speaker 1: like people wouldn't know that or we don't get their
Speaker 1: credit in that way, like you definitely give like, oh,
Speaker 1: I can see why she's a mom not us, Okay,
Speaker 1: I mean no, I mean like we talked about Yeah,
Speaker 1: she was talking about yeah, I say, mom, you have
Speaker 1: maternal sweet like oh bitch, and here I ago. I'm
Speaker 1: thinking she's talking about by racial nosts, what we do
Speaker 1: look alike. And we talk about sex. I mean by
Speaker 1: that is we could be competing with each other, We
Speaker 1: could be at each other's throats and trying to undermine
Speaker 1: and undercut. But it's not that at all, Right, we
Speaker 1: ain't the rap girls. Well, I'm excited to do an
Speaker 1: icebreaker with you guys, because um, Jared off Mike. I
Speaker 1: told him that. Someone was like, oh my god, I
Speaker 1: can't wait for you to talk sex with Jared because
Speaker 1: he's so delicate and looks so easy. They said, he
Speaker 1: delicately talks about sex, So I think that we have
Speaker 1: to get it, get a the little yeah, a little
Speaker 1: runch say that. I don't know. That's the first time
Speaker 1: I'm hearing that that's not true. Kevin takes the same thing,
Speaker 1: Kevin the way I look, or is it the way
Speaker 1: I look or the way so I'm not gonna like
Speaker 1: we said your your braids were giving boy now when
Speaker 1: it's just in a good way back pony's heel, It's like,
Speaker 1: all he looks so nice, but that that's a secret power.
Speaker 1: Not a secret power, that's a secret power. Those are
Speaker 1: dangerous ones. So you're dangerous. Damn same to date, you're
Speaker 1: very nice. You are very nice. Though okay, I'm very nice. Yes,
Speaker 1: you are very nice. The tats that sucked it up
Speaker 1: for me like that made me feel like, oh, he's
Speaker 1: not what I thought he was. So you don't get
Speaker 1: the vibe that I'm delicate. No, it's changed over the years.
Speaker 1: Maybe the more I've gotten to No, Shaan, I'm like, Nah,
Speaker 1: she wouldn't be with no cornball cornball a cornball? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't think. But when you said like wouldn't talk
Speaker 1: about sex or wouldn't do certain things, that's why I said,
Speaker 1: I will say too. In my first time meeting you
Speaker 1: was I wanted to move in. I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 1: He was coming in setting up the lights and babe,
Speaker 1: do you need anything else? And it was just I
Speaker 1: felt the love. But now we're gonna get into the team,
Speaker 1: so we're gonna start. Um. I got these questions from
Speaker 1: a game shout out black owned last couple standing. But
Speaker 1: again with us having are you familiar with Omar and
Speaker 1: the whole team over there? I feel like they sent
Speaker 1: me a pack of cards that could be oh my god,
Speaker 1: y'all may have to do this at home, and hopefully
Speaker 1: you don't like break up for it because the questions
Speaker 1: are intense, But it's to get you, guys to communicate
Speaker 1: as a couple and really see each other. I picked
Speaker 1: the less messy ones out, so this less messy, the
Speaker 1: less messy. You and your partner and your kid are
Speaker 1: about to get evicted and have no place to go.
Speaker 1: Your partners X will give you the money to pay
Speaker 1: the rent only if they could have sex one last time?
Speaker 1: Do you accept the money? So thou let' rep been
Speaker 1: so your partner's X will give you the money to
Speaker 1: pay the rent only if they can have sex one
Speaker 1: more time? Do you accept the money? Take the money.
Speaker 1: That's why you could be on the street. I take
Speaker 1: the money. We'll do it, Okay, No, no, baby, Be
Speaker 1: honest with you, Jay, I would be completely comfortable with
Speaker 1: you having sex with the X right now for no reason,
Speaker 1: just for the joy of it. I think also too,
Speaker 1: I think Jared's so good and bad that I like
Speaker 1: to lend him out because yes, I'm just a commodity
Speaker 1: my partner. I'll be honest with you. So I've literally
Speaker 1: my friends can't spend the night over anymore at this point,
Speaker 1: everyone who has um has sucked me and my man
Speaker 1: and so literally though they said, well, they were like,
Speaker 1: I'm we'll talk he slept over, she hasn't, But it's
Speaker 1: literally just like they're like, thank you for sharing your boyfriend.
Speaker 1: But also this experience was so like amazing. So even
Speaker 1: for you to say that, I don't think most women,
Speaker 1: even though their partners are great, especially in the bedroom,
Speaker 1: would be open enough to kind of share. I love it,
Speaker 1: I live for even I fantasize about you and other
Speaker 1: people all the time when we're having sex. So do
Speaker 1: you know what it is too? I don't know if
Speaker 1: we know how to have a three summer, how to
Speaker 1: ask somebody else to enter into it, but I think
Speaker 1: it would be one about okay. Well, for one, when
Speaker 1: you say you don't want to ask, does that mean
Speaker 1: the moment has come and you like, can you guys
Speaker 1: think the moment hasn't came? I think one, we don't
Speaker 1: go out enough to like catch a vibe with somebody
Speaker 1: and then come back or go to their house or anything,
Speaker 1: So that's fair. Yeah, I don't think we ever been
Speaker 1: in a position to do that. Go I mean, prett baby,
Speaker 1: we went out. No, but I'm saying like we're not.
Speaker 1: That's being proposition. I mean I just think that I
Speaker 1: receiving how you are, even how you were saying, your
Speaker 1: fans have given you so much more than just like love,
Speaker 1: They've given you support in other ways. I don't really
Speaker 1: get that. So I just don't think maybe like my
Speaker 1: arms aren't open to receiving all the abundance, don't You're fine?
Speaker 1: I don't know what that drop the ball, you know
Speaker 1: what I was saying, This is kind of I think
Speaker 1: we're a little bit more relatable than you. No disrespect
Speaker 1: here me out like weird telling stories are There was
Speaker 1: the premise of being these nine to five girls talking
Speaker 1: about everyday experiences with sex, and people have watched this
Speaker 1: climb with us, and you have to talk from a
Speaker 1: very like we We asked questions a lot like I
Speaker 1: don't know if that's right, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: but you have you know it all. I think that's
Speaker 1: not true though, because today you stumped me. In the
Speaker 1: first one. You're speaking and you're looking at that camera
Speaker 1: he's giving I'm saying back like someone being like nah
Speaker 1: or almost intimidated, especially women, you know, because you just
Speaker 1: never know, even though you've discussed like feeling sexual and
Speaker 1: and and like being open to that. You even said that,
Speaker 1: I think on my episode, but I could see them
Speaker 1: being like unsure and the other thing I'm curious to know,
Speaker 1: would you guys ever try a dating app together? No, personally,
Speaker 1: I want to get the vibe off of somebody, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like there's just something about in
Speaker 1: person things, so for you guys, you've had three sums.
Speaker 1: How does that six of Simpsons? And so I don't
Speaker 1: have sex club three SEMs? Oh yeah, I go to
Speaker 1: the sex club, not any sex club. You get invited
Speaker 1: to a certain one. Yeah, so there there's uh, there's
Speaker 1: the one that we both are familiar with and we
Speaker 1: have the owner your ands w which is the members only.
Speaker 1: And now the one that I go to in Brooklyn
Speaker 1: is an all black one and it is invite only,
Speaker 1: like and they curate um, the certain people that they might.
Speaker 1: It's it's great, yeah, but in an environment that's not
Speaker 1: like so I'm normally it happens within like clubs or bars,
Speaker 1: and most of the time it has been like listen listeners,
Speaker 1: like all of two thousand nineteen people listen to horrible station.
Speaker 1: Really terrible to say, but did that work out for
Speaker 1: the best all of you? Only one person was like
Speaker 1: a weirdo fan um and I only know this because
Speaker 1: she faced timed her home girl while she was drunk
Speaker 1: in my apartment. Was like, yeah, this wheezy house and
Speaker 1: if that's just weird, god, that's not bad. Though, that's
Speaker 1: not that's not too bad. That could have gotten a
Speaker 1: whole lot of days. But that just leads you into
Speaker 1: what else are you capable of doing? If you could
Speaker 1: do that in my face? Yeah, certain people, if I
Speaker 1: had a three, if I had sex with them, I'm
Speaker 1: definitely telling people about it, and I'm making a video
Speaker 1: in their apartment. Be but Okay, I don't believe. I
Speaker 1: don't believe I wouldn't get caught making it. So she
Speaker 1: probably Yeah, that's she didn't do it while you were aware.
Speaker 1: I wasn't a famous person's house recently, not for sex,
Speaker 1: like a party type thing, And I was like, bit,
Speaker 1: look at his best room, Like, um, you are okay,
Speaker 1: I'll tell you. I want to ask you'all another place shim.
Speaker 1: So the next one, your husband doesn't like your best
Speaker 1: friend of twenty years sham and says she has to go.
Speaker 1: Do you drop your friend or lose their husband? Jared
Speaker 1: would rarely ever answer the question if I would. I would.
Speaker 1: I'm saying I would drop the friend, Okay, not because
Speaker 1: because I just trust your instincts so much and you
Speaker 1: just would never ever do that. So for you to
Speaker 1: do that, you would have to know that this person.
Speaker 1: You would have to see something in that. Yeah. Crow
Speaker 1: warts people in their sleep. Yeah, I I would drop
Speaker 1: the friend too. It's just like you're with somebody that's
Speaker 1: a life partner. They provide more than just a friendship.
Speaker 1: You have to go with that because I want to
Speaker 1: say that Dick, Jared, huh, that's more than the friendship. Yes,
Speaker 1: that's kind of it like that. What I mean to
Speaker 1: say is that, like you know, with your partner, your
Speaker 1: partner knows you probably more intimate lead then your friend.
Speaker 1: And so if she can, if she could spot that
Speaker 1: there's a bad person around me, I gotta trust that instinct.
Speaker 1: You know, I can make a case for it. I
Speaker 1: could be like, well, you know, am I allowed one
Speaker 1: bad friend? You know you're you're allowed one bad friend? Right?
Speaker 1: Do you do? You know? Do you all both know
Speaker 1: who it is? I know who you're one bad friend is,
Speaker 1: but that person has been edged away over time, and
Speaker 1: I didn't shove, but I've definitely been nudging or just
Speaker 1: blowing from a distance, like going, and I'm blowing from
Speaker 1: my bad friend, not just me, like I'm the one.
Speaker 1: Friends ain't bad. Friends are not bad, even though the boyfriends.
Speaker 1: I'm the friend that once my friends get boyfriends, I'm
Speaker 1: the friend out of nowhere. They don't want them. When
Speaker 1: I say, I mean like drag you out, not even
Speaker 1: like make you Like I'm not saying like that, but
Speaker 1: like they can be like yeah, I know when you
Speaker 1: go out with easy you get too crazy and like
Speaker 1: girl I would be in FaceTime like she talking to
Speaker 1: her man would be on the couch. Oh my god. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I'm let's go, I mean ready. But also I
Speaker 1: don't feel like that bad. I mean I like that
Speaker 1: side of you, and I like when you come home drunk.
Speaker 1: I like all of at So I mean kind of drunk?
Speaker 1: Are you? What kind of what kind of drunking? Guy?
Speaker 1: I just sucked in the bathroom of a bar. I'd
Speaker 1: be ready, but like I'll be desperate for that one
Speaker 1: dick that I want. Like it's not like I'll take
Speaker 1: anybody saying because I love text in the middle of it,
Speaker 1: like I'm sucked up. I can't wait to get you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, blah blah blah, show me what you
Speaker 1: wearing like I'm extra so shan hood wink me when
Speaker 1: it came to drinking, Wait, what do that mean? Like
Speaker 1: like fake me out because I don't drink. Oh wait,
Speaker 1: so you were you were not? Really? Wait we went
Speaker 1: to a club and I bought her a drink and
Speaker 1: she was that's not she had to drink, like she
Speaker 1: had to drink. And I remember midway through and she
Speaker 1: started acting like she was drunk and everything. I'm just
Speaker 1: having a great time. No, she was acting. She was acting,
Speaker 1: and I was like, damn, this is cool. You're fun,
Speaker 1: you're drinking. And then we got together and now when
Speaker 1: we go out, I have to be the only one drinking,
Speaker 1: so I'm not. I'm but I enjoy it, so I'm
Speaker 1: just like continue, yes, yes, thank god. Yeah, I would
Speaker 1: hate to be with someone that didn't drink. And was like,
Speaker 1: is that's your third Yeah, can go out with non drinkers.
Speaker 1: I don't mind what I went on drinkers as long
Speaker 1: as they're the energy is the same. You know. Um
Speaker 1: we have I won't say his name, but there's a
Speaker 1: friend of mine who doesn't drink or smoke and people
Speaker 1: ask if he does cocaine because he's so hyper and
Speaker 1: he's a party host and m C and like he's
Speaker 1: just got the fucking vibe and like, I don't know
Speaker 1: how some people could do that because I need a
Speaker 1: litlst them to like be all like but when you
Speaker 1: have it, you have it. And I think we got
Speaker 1: to get over that ship in her head sometimes because
Speaker 1: I'm definitely that person. Even if someone doesn't want to drink,
Speaker 1: but they do, I'm like, that's a little bit, you're
Speaker 1: gonna leave me alone. Not the peer pressure, but like no,
Speaker 1: not like d u I peer pressure. Last question, and
Speaker 1: this one actually came from a Patreon episode as well,
Speaker 1: where Wheezy shared this um. But both of you, I
Speaker 1: would like each of you to tell your partner about
Speaker 1: the last time they gave you a gift that you
Speaker 1: didn't like. Man, we're just talking about how much I'm
Speaker 1: not a good gift giver, so I like not to
Speaker 1: offense this at all. But also the truth is I
Speaker 1: very rarely give you gifts. Oh you know what's so
Speaker 1: sad that Jared said? He was like, nobody has ever
Speaker 1: given you a Valentine's Day gift before? That's me. He
Speaker 1: gives me gifts. Ever, I'm just not good. I'm very
Speaker 1: generous though, yes I can't say about myself that sounds corny,
Speaker 1: but you are, you are, you are. But I'm not
Speaker 1: a good gift giver, So I don't you would rather
Speaker 1: you would rather be like, let's go to the store
Speaker 1: and you pick out what you want, rather than like, oh,
Speaker 1: let me into it, yeah, and the rest out the
Speaker 1: whole time, Well, you're not like I just don't enjoy
Speaker 1: the experience, and I'm just like, man, I'd rather just
Speaker 1: be like, go dinner, whatever you want. I can't say
Speaker 1: that there was a gift that she didn't like, that
Speaker 1: I didn't like that she gave me, but I will
Speaker 1: say that there's a lot of times when we're going
Speaker 1: out to eat and she tries to force me to
Speaker 1: eat something that I don't like, and I know that
Speaker 1: I don't like it, and she's just like just try,
Speaker 1: just like, like, what's an example, um, because that's me.
Speaker 1: For one, you heard earlier she puts, uh, vine or
Speaker 1: what is it, vinegar, vinegar on her apple side, vinegar
Speaker 1: on her popcorn. I don't want that. That's not that's
Speaker 1: an extreme. Jared doesn't want to try anything, which is
Speaker 1: probably like an octopus like I don't mind, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: venturely eat, but I know it don't sound like because
Speaker 1: we know you're turning to the bone. So what should
Speaker 1: be making him like? Love? That's one thing him and
Speaker 1: my dad bonded off of that, Jared will eat any
Speaker 1: West Indian, any Indiana. That's right, I actually do like it.
Speaker 1: Like in l A, we can't get doubles. Okay, I
Speaker 1: miss eating which any West Indian people out there. Jared
Speaker 1: once was like, what what are those Caribbean burgers? So
Speaker 1: not Caribbean murder that was cute? Were good though they
Speaker 1: are good? What is it? Tell us the food? It
Speaker 1: could be anything, Honestly, to God, anything that comes from me.
Speaker 1: I think that. I think because I pressure you so
Speaker 1: much too, I feel like you're more if you offered it,
Speaker 1: he would say yes. If I offered it, he'd be
Speaker 1: like no and get aggressive about it. That's not just true,
Speaker 1: that's not true. If I know I'm not gonna like it,
Speaker 1: I just won't. Okay, what's your Jared pet peeves? Since
Speaker 1: it ain't get my pet peeve? Jared, um, Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: I know. I hey, am, I don't have a perfect man.
Speaker 1: But I trying to think of like a specific thing
Speaker 1: that really bothers me because we all think it. We
Speaker 1: all think you guys the perfect couple. So tell us
Speaker 1: something because this is sad. The worst thing is the food.
Speaker 1: This is not the worst thing. You just when you ask.
Speaker 1: Since you said the worst gift, you said the worst gift,
Speaker 1: you gotta thank you so much. Um, I don't know. Listen,
Speaker 1: I'll come back to it. There's probably tons of best
Speaker 1: I feel terrible. Well, we got some questions, so we
Speaker 1: don't get there. So we're gonna get into look our
Speaker 1: vanilla ship that comes from the New York Times. And
Speaker 1: I thought that this would be really great, especially even
Speaker 1: seeing that you guys clearly have different level. Language is everything? Uh,
Speaker 1: this one is actually and I want to know. That's
Speaker 1: what I'll say. Let me say that it's a big one.
Speaker 1: He is not affectionate, so what's crazy? That's what this
Speaker 1: is about. And I want to know if you are
Speaker 1: familiar with the term inter intimate relationships. No, I'm not familiar.
Speaker 1: I want to know not affectionate? Is it text message?
Speaker 1: Is it physical touch? Is it affirmation? What affection? Would
Speaker 1: you want? More physical? More physical? For sure? Physical? Yea
Speaker 1: more physical touch? A thousand that's not associated with sex.
Speaker 1: That's my number one, Jared. This is where you softly
Speaker 1: put your hand on her shoulder. Yeah, and see what's yours?
Speaker 1: My love language? Quality time? Quality time? Yeah, that's now
Speaker 1: and acts of service only because I've never received it
Speaker 1: until recently that I know. Now, there's a backstory to
Speaker 1: my physical touch thing. You know, there's this back story.
Speaker 1: There's there's things there that I'm working through. Um, are
Speaker 1: you sharing it? I could share it? Yeah, So when
Speaker 1: I like my first experience with like physical touch, I
Speaker 1: remember I was in middle school or freshman year, and
Speaker 1: I was I had a girlfriend and I was walking
Speaker 1: with her, holding her hand, and my dad came to
Speaker 1: pick me up and he saw me holding hands with
Speaker 1: this girl and embarrassed me in front of the entire
Speaker 1: like school. Which have you guys ever seen yours dad before? No,
Speaker 1: pull him up right now. He's big, No her his dad.
Speaker 1: He was not at all what you would expect when
Speaker 1: you hear that story. He's grown up, he's grown a lot.
Speaker 1: He's yeah, he's he's a lot better now. We have
Speaker 1: a great relations Back then, was there rules that you
Speaker 1: weren't supposed to have girlfriends? Yes? So, oh yeah there
Speaker 1: it is. Which was your dad? That's his dad? Oh damn,
Speaker 1: that's dad. Yeah, maybe I could come Okay, now I
Speaker 1: could see it. Let me see. He looked like a daddy.
Speaker 1: He looked like a dady said, it's not at always
Speaker 1: you think I see it. He looked like black daddy yea.
Speaker 1: And there was rules to not have it. And but
Speaker 1: also I knew it was out of protection because you know,
Speaker 1: he made a lot of mistakes with women and then
Speaker 1: had me young, and so there was like that luring
Speaker 1: fear that he had with me. So it just expressed himself,
Speaker 1: you know, by shaming me whenever I was like around
Speaker 1: a woman. Yeah, well, I'm hoping you're working through that.
Speaker 1: You are needing more physical touch. Inter Intimate relationship is
Speaker 1: actually where for some couples, having different non sexual intimacy
Speaker 1: preferences can put his train on the relationship. So it's
Speaker 1: actually kind of what we just said. So it's hugs, backrubs, cuddling,
Speaker 1: holding hands. There are many ways in which we show
Speaker 1: our love for our significant others, and we all needn't
Speaker 1: want different amounts of emotional and physical intimacy. While couples
Speaker 1: would different sex drives face hurdles, many couples may be
Speaker 1: involved in an inter intimate relationship where each partner has
Speaker 1: different preferences when it comes to giving and receiving and
Speaker 1: receiving non sexual affection. Well, this is really unword for
Speaker 1: it what you guys are in right now. Yes, and
Speaker 1: we talked about it. Okay, every night. Every night I
Speaker 1: rubber back to she falls asleep. So that's true. So
Speaker 1: that was the precedent set during pregnancy that I was
Speaker 1: like this one go. But I love that and I
Speaker 1: appreciate that, And yes, it has gone better, and I
Speaker 1: acknowledge I'm unreasonably needy when it comes to physical touch,
Speaker 1: to the point I've never had anybody in my life satisfied.
Speaker 1: And I will admit this out loud. Since having a baby,
Speaker 1: I feel like I finally have gotten to a place
Speaker 1: between having Ryu and getting that much physical affection and
Speaker 1: having you where I don't feel like I'm at a
Speaker 1: lack anymore. Well, I just sent you the article because
Speaker 1: now you're gonna have to do a whole lot of research.
Speaker 1: That's incredible that this dog is just sitting here cuddling you,
Speaker 1: not moving, just being a complete piece with you. Dude.
Speaker 1: This dog is so good. I'm terrified. Like I haven't
Speaker 1: been horny for one for two the physical touch thing
Speaker 1: totally feel the same. Um the partners that I have had,
Speaker 1: some are good, some aren't, but more recently I had
Speaker 1: a conversation about it and he was like, I don't
Speaker 1: even know if I can like do as much as
Speaker 1: you need. And I guess, okay, four days later about
Speaker 1: a dog. Oh yeah, no, I ain't gonna. I used
Speaker 1: to come on the pod all the time, and me
Speaker 1: and her actually used to talk about this a lot
Speaker 1: of my previous like partners. Um, we didn't even really kiss.
Speaker 1: There was no cuddling, there was no like massage like
Speaker 1: it was really no, and we used to talk about
Speaker 1: like just the lack of affection. We fucked, but the
Speaker 1: intimacy was just never there. And again now having had
Speaker 1: to see that, oh no, ain't never going back. I
Speaker 1: need to cuddle like I like the spooning. I like
Speaker 1: I will lean over in the car just to like
Speaker 1: put my hand on your arm type ship. Now I
Speaker 1: see how super needy I am for that physical touch.
Speaker 1: That's probably now number three in the language. Pump it
Speaker 1: up now, y'all notice a sex show. We need to
Speaker 1: get a little bit, a little bit Nancy up in hill.
Speaker 1: And our next segment is the horr Derve and I
Speaker 1: am leaving that to the both of you. So our
Speaker 1: Horror Derve segment is the sex tip. Okay, and so
Speaker 1: I need you all to think, no, let's have Jerry
Speaker 1: give it. We want jar give it what you'd be doing,
Speaker 1: so all right, and don't be delicate with it. Wait
Speaker 1: wait wait wait wait, so uh something that I like
Speaker 1: to do so for me, I really like going down
Speaker 1: on a woman. It's like my thing to do. So
Speaker 1: that's how you know somebody good at it. Wait. Wait,
Speaker 1: A trick that I like to do is like first year,
Speaker 1: after you warm it up, you get a nice How
Speaker 1: do you warm it up? We need deta yeh, lick
Speaker 1: around the vagina first before you hit the clip. Then
Speaker 1: you gotta look up and down, usually on the left
Speaker 1: side right from usually on the left, your left to
Speaker 1: her left. Um, it would be my left and so okay,
Speaker 1: so aftern you warm it up, then you you you
Speaker 1: can insert two fingers get in. Now there's a two
Speaker 1: there's two spots that I like to hit. Mine is
Speaker 1: like a little bit deeper and before you hit the cervics,
Speaker 1: don't hit the cervics is like the A spot and
Speaker 1: you do it come here motion. Then you could come
Speaker 1: down to the G spot, put a lot of pressure
Speaker 1: and uh, and then kind of bounce between the two
Speaker 1: as you're still looking up the clip. So here's my
Speaker 1: question to you, Jared, because not everyone has the same
Speaker 1: sexual preferences, and we talked about this even in your episode.
Speaker 1: What do you do if a woman is not your fingers,
Speaker 1: well not into fingers A lot of women don't like Yeah,
Speaker 1: you obviously are checking in making sure that she's happy
Speaker 1: about what's going on. The language that you use is
Speaker 1: very important because I find that a lot of times
Speaker 1: men go into it and they go what do you like?
Speaker 1: Or they go into it and be like do you
Speaker 1: like that? And so I usually like to go down
Speaker 1: the line of like um, using adjectives like do you
Speaker 1: want more pressure? Do you want me to orb around
Speaker 1: this area? To the science now? Would you like me
Speaker 1: to orb? Or being around the pits like it's like this,
Speaker 1: so here if this is let me sure you're right here?
Speaker 1: Means or bits. He doesn't dropped the last two letters,
Speaker 1: all right, wait wait wait, so this is if this
Speaker 1: is the clip, it's like putting the stimulation around the clip,
Speaker 1: not directly on it, because you know something it's sensitive.
Speaker 1: Do you blow down here? Sometimes? Sometimes no, you don't
Speaker 1: ever blow You suck, which I'm not even a massive
Speaker 1: fan of sucking, but I also appreciate the variety. Tie
Speaker 1: but you do suck, and a lot of people like sucking.
Speaker 1: Blowing is actually the one thing that you should not
Speaker 1: do when somebody is pregnant. It's hazardous to the baby. Really,
Speaker 1: I don't blow inside I'm not blowing inside them, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't wait wait, wait, okay, now we're really learning
Speaker 1: some ship kill someone blowing in their vagina. But I
Speaker 1: believe it has to be like like like It's definitely
Speaker 1: not like blowing like a blo. I'm just talking about
Speaker 1: like a oh, like a like a hot Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: because I don't want to dick, but I don't. Who
Speaker 1: is that? Yes, that's crazy. You needs to be wider,
Speaker 1: that needs to be No, I haven't. You don't look
Speaker 1: like you have. I know what. I think I could
Speaker 1: be good at it. Though everybody's gonna want JAREDY think
Speaker 1: after that you will have no. I would like that.
Speaker 1: I would like that. I would like telling you imagine
Speaker 1: watching this show and there so I'm talking about how
Speaker 1: they were having trouble finding someone, and then visually y'all
Speaker 1: glad in the d M. Their their acts are in
Speaker 1: the description of their episode. So or also called a
Speaker 1: gas embolism, occurs when one or more air bubbles enter
Speaker 1: a vein or artery and block it um. It can
Speaker 1: travel to your brain, heart lungs, cause a heart attack, stroke,
Speaker 1: respiratory failure, and I have I think in rare instances,
Speaker 1: blowing into the vagina can cause an air embolism. In
Speaker 1: this case, it can occur if there's a terror, Jared,
Speaker 1: we have the same question. We do, I know we did.
Speaker 1: Risk is higher in pregnant women who may have a
Speaker 1: chair in their placenta because again it's the tear in
Speaker 1: the vagina. This can happen during um scuba diving as well. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: so my question is you know when you you you know,
Speaker 1: you're messing around down there, and then you put it
Speaker 1: in and then you you have air in the vagina oye.
Speaker 1: That was my ques exactly. So is that not dangerous?
Speaker 1: Is that not dangerous when we queath? Maybe because it's
Speaker 1: that's because the quef is going out. Yeah, but that's
Speaker 1: in there, That's what it is. It's air that's in there.
Speaker 1: And that's why I go because the air going in
Speaker 1: it's causing it. So technically equip the air escapes, because yes,
Speaker 1: because the air is escaping a kid. What are those
Speaker 1: things called the farting putting? Yes, yeah, But at the
Speaker 1: point of it is though at a certain position you
Speaker 1: are trapping air in there. Yeah, and you're pushing it.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Yeah, that which is interesting because there's
Speaker 1: nothing that they say in terms of positions that's not safe.
Speaker 1: So everything is safe except for blowing into vagina. Just
Speaker 1: nothing needs to be more safe. There's more unsafe. Maybe
Speaker 1: the foot on your face that don't that's okay, it
Speaker 1: doesn't feel good, but that doesn't mean it's not safe,
Speaker 1: not safe that anything that will make you land in
Speaker 1: the belly. What's the wildest fetish that you came across
Speaker 1: that you had to experience experience. I was gonna say,
Speaker 1: we both how about that. I think the adult baby
Speaker 1: diaper fetish has been the wildest. It's not the craziest
Speaker 1: we had. Somebody asked for that. Oh yeah, he wore
Speaker 1: a diaper on our episode, and we know he said personally,
Speaker 1: oh he said, or the diaper fetish was the craziest
Speaker 1: one we've ever had on I think the craziest thing
Speaker 1: someone's asked me for nothing. That nuts. I like the
Speaker 1: cream pie eating during threesomes. So that's probably really like
Speaker 1: too far for a lot of people. I think I'm
Speaker 1: the one who asked for it. But also, like mind you,
Speaker 1: we had to get to a point where we could
Speaker 1: sleep without conduct like like you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: we had to be each other's only partners. So maybe
Speaker 1: there's like a rarity that you enjoy with it. That's
Speaker 1: what gets you off because you know that you're doing
Speaker 1: it with somebody that you trust. Maybe I think the
Speaker 1: other thing too, is like I like going down on women,
Speaker 1: and I love like when a dude comes like that
Speaker 1: literally can make me come. It's ridiculous. I feel like
Speaker 1: such a sub by saying that, like if you come outcome,
Speaker 1: But it's true. There's been times where I can't get
Speaker 1: off and then dude hasn't known it's because he hasn't
Speaker 1: finished yet. Sometimes I just need to see it. It's sick.
Speaker 1: That's not sick. There's too many people. Oh God, don't
Speaker 1: listen to mom. I don't even know. For me, honestly,
Speaker 1: I do it all. There's this one fetish that um
Speaker 1: I knew. Um I worked on the show and one
Speaker 1: of the gentlemen that was on the show had this
Speaker 1: thing about feet, which is normal, that's not that's not
Speaker 1: that's not a normal thing. But then he showed me
Speaker 1: a video where was in the girl's asked when she
Speaker 1: was like on his day, no that, But he had
Speaker 1: this video where she first she started with just barefoot
Speaker 1: and she was stomping on his face right and then
Speaker 1: and then she started on the no no, he started
Speaker 1: she started putting on different hills and was stumping on
Speaker 1: his face with different hills and different shoes. So that
Speaker 1: doesn't his face his face, that doesn't Like I was like,
Speaker 1: this is probably showed this to you to say like,
Speaker 1: look at this great thing this weekend. What happened was
Speaker 1: somehow we gotten discussion. People were talking about fetishes and
Speaker 1: he was like I just love to get kicked in
Speaker 1: the face. And I was like, are you serious because
Speaker 1: I thought he was joking at first, and he was like, no, seriously,
Speaker 1: and then he pulled up the video of him getting
Speaker 1: oh you know he paid for that, honey, Well, I
Speaker 1: think it's something like that, like it was his wife. See.
Speaker 1: But but stuff like that like to me, especially because
Speaker 1: it's not inter course, I think you can find more
Speaker 1: people to do stuff like that for free. You think
Speaker 1: you can find someone, not someone experience that people know.
Speaker 1: I know, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're
Speaker 1: with a sex worker, Yeah, she's gonna want to. But
Speaker 1: if it's just a regular girl and she and I
Speaker 1: think she'll be open to do it, doing it before
Speaker 1: she sucks dick or eats as right now? Would you
Speaker 1: guys be comfortable stepping on someone's face if I was
Speaker 1: in Central Park if someone asked me to do it, Okay,
Speaker 1: I thought you were at send What are you fucking
Speaker 1: kidding me? No? I believe in everyone being fulfilled in life, Okay,
Speaker 1: And if I happen to be asked, I would do it.
Speaker 1: Hold on, hold on, let's go back. I said what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Uh huh. A dude comes up to you,
Speaker 1: he's excuse me. I think you're beautiful. I love those shoes. Huh.
Speaker 1: Would you mind if I just laid down right here
Speaker 1: on the curb, not around the kids? But if I
Speaker 1: just lay down on this curb and you just step
Speaker 1: on my face, I'd probably be like, are you sure?
Speaker 1: I mean, I might even be like, please tell me
Speaker 1: on here that you approve that I do this. Would
Speaker 1: you but have you what about in the sex club?
Speaker 1: Would you definitely do it in the sex club? In
Speaker 1: the sex club, No, I'm not really into kinks and
Speaker 1: fetishes around a whole lot of people, so like, I
Speaker 1: just want to get sucked in some of the biggest
Speaker 1: part but well known but I'm fully dressed. He want
Speaker 1: to be kicked in the face. Okay, let her, Let
Speaker 1: her have this moment of philanthropy. Okay, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, that's what I'm literally out here trying to
Speaker 1: do good for the world, and you want to make
Speaker 1: me feel bad about it. Then you want that I
Speaker 1: don't know that you're talking about ending world hunger bit.
Speaker 1: I mean, this could really make his day. That could
Speaker 1: really for someone like that. Actually know what It's funny
Speaker 1: because I did this podcast once where they were doing
Speaker 1: like embarrassing sex stories on stage and somebody was telling
Speaker 1: the story of a dude who they were about to
Speaker 1: get intimate, and he was like, I really don't want
Speaker 1: to make you uncomfortable, and this is something that's really
Speaker 1: on me. But I know she's wearing socks and I
Speaker 1: really get aroused when I see feet, And would you
Speaker 1: mind taking your socks off. And she told it on
Speaker 1: stage and everybody was dying of laughter, and she was like,
Speaker 1: I was like, you fucking weirdo. How I was like,
Speaker 1: imagine how scarring that is for that person, and how
Speaker 1: much courage it took for them to actually ask for that.
Speaker 1: So the fact that if somebody did ask you in
Speaker 1: Central Park to kick them in the face, it probably
Speaker 1: took them so much courage just as to ask. So
Speaker 1: you probably I love sham, I love ship, you know,
Speaker 1: or even people from burning buildings, because that's the tone
Speaker 1: that you have right now, so much for him to ask,
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, I'm gonna lie. We talked about
Speaker 1: it all the time, even for like the men listening
Speaker 1: who maybe want to try pegging, or would like a
Speaker 1: finger in their ass, or want to even share the
Speaker 1: weirdest things that come to their mind. Like I know
Speaker 1: that it's a lot for even men sometimes to share
Speaker 1: what type of porn they're into out of the fear
Speaker 1: of being judged. Westingly, we were talking about nipple play,
Speaker 1: and you were the partner who didn't ask for it, right,
Speaker 1: but enjoys it. Even for a lot of men to
Speaker 1: ask for their nipples and I'm like, it's just a nipples.
Speaker 1: Never asked me to do it, and you like it
Speaker 1: so much in it, I just really realized you were
Speaker 1: into it. No, I didn't. I didn't even really fully
Speaker 1: know that I wasn't into it until we started doing this.
Speaker 1: I imagine if I got into a new sexual partner,
Speaker 1: I would be like, yeah, this is something that I
Speaker 1: mento now. But we started a month and you said
Speaker 1: because I did it. I mean I think, I think,
Speaker 1: I think you can find I think you find out
Speaker 1: too um even for a woman. Again, to me, even
Speaker 1: her saying, is that not weird thing. A lot of
Speaker 1: men don't want to admit it, but they do enjoy it.
Speaker 1: So I think even a tip that I would give
Speaker 1: is just to see if your man is into it.
Speaker 1: Slow kissed down before you suck his dick, so slow
Speaker 1: kiss him from his mouth, then kiss his neck, and
Speaker 1: then spend some time at the nipples. If he pushes
Speaker 1: you down, maybe he doesn't like what you're doing there,
Speaker 1: but a lot of men will like kind of let
Speaker 1: you know that they actually do enjoy it. It's just
Speaker 1: not a thing that I think men are brave enough
Speaker 1: to say, courage it to the bravery, the bravery respected
Speaker 1: mother Mandy the first respond well too as well. A
Speaker 1: satisfactory sex life elongates your lifespan, so you could be
Speaker 1: adding years. I'm gonna be a lot to Alma hunted bitch,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get to say I've been here for ten
Speaker 1: for ten decades makes you look younger and longer as well,
Speaker 1: because it releases releases d h A, so you are
Speaker 1: it's a. It's the It's like something that makes the
Speaker 1: skin look more elastic, like collegen. Yes, drink well. I
Speaker 1: just found a random link that said that that's why
Speaker 1: black don't crack because we produce collagen more. But it's
Speaker 1: also the reason why we key Lloyd faster. Smart. Fact
Speaker 1: really just be falling across the most random inter committed.
Speaker 1: What was the term intimate enter intimacy? Yea intimate relationship.
Speaker 1: So guys, the next part of the show is the
Speaker 1: Horrible Decision. And this is where I literally broke down
Speaker 1: questions for the both of you, because not only are
Speaker 1: you newly married, you were newly parents. And this is
Speaker 1: something that me and Wheezy, even though she thinks she
Speaker 1: pushed this dog out her coach, she didn't so there's
Speaker 1: a lot of things that we have zero experience on
Speaker 1: as far as being a parent, what it's like and
Speaker 1: how it affects you. Did not I am post body,
Speaker 1: ain't come at my pussy. That dog ain't come out short.
Speaker 1: I am a march STUPI almar. But you don't have
Speaker 1: to have something come out your pussy to be a mom.
Speaker 1: To clarify, oh yeah, okay, sorry, ship adopted a child,
Speaker 1: maybe at least let it be a human baby that
Speaker 1: part um. So I wanted to talk about with the
Speaker 1: both of you because I think you're learning. She's saying
Speaker 1: a lot, she's giving you all hint it, she's ready
Speaker 1: for some other things. But I wanted to ask you, guys,
Speaker 1: how you were able to not only keep it spot,
Speaker 1: keep it spicy pre pregnancy, but post pregnancy. Did you
Speaker 1: feel hot when you're pregnant? You know, yes and no.
Speaker 1: I felt like I intentionally forced myself to feel hot
Speaker 1: even though I didn't because I knew that it would
Speaker 1: benefit me and benefit our relationship and benefit the baby.
Speaker 1: So I didn't feel it, but I was like, let
Speaker 1: me put myself in a position, so I that's in lingerie.
Speaker 1: I bought like full like little leather suit for myself.
Speaker 1: So I did all the things to put myself in
Speaker 1: the light to make myself feel safe. You were working out,
Speaker 1: I was working out. I mean that didn't really help
Speaker 1: that much though. What was your what was your favorite
Speaker 1: body change during pregnancy? Breast thousand a thousand percent tits?
Speaker 1: Like I never existed in that world before. I'm actually
Speaker 1: upset that you're not more enthusiastic about you know what
Speaker 1: it is? What it is? I feel you know there
Speaker 1: right now, they're not mine the right life source. Their
Speaker 1: feel like that though, Like do you really feel like
Speaker 1: there's like a there's a part of it that's like
Speaker 1: watching and also to like because I mean now that
Speaker 1: I'm breastfeed squeeze milk everywhere you guys watch sex Life
Speaker 1: where a lot of people learned about that when you orgasm, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that it drips out, Like did you notice last night?
Speaker 1: I had? Okay, you look it up? Do you look
Speaker 1: at it? I did get some of my mouth. Oh oh,
Speaker 1: that's what we're doing. I have to I have to
Speaker 1: express for you, and I do have it in a bottle,
Speaker 1: but it's been staying there for a while, so I
Speaker 1: don't want to do that to you. Oh, it's not
Speaker 1: unless you don't mind, she will suck your nipple. It's
Speaker 1: sitting in the other studio. You never mind. Oh you
Speaker 1: still want to give her a bottle? Never mind? But
Speaker 1: it's breast from a mother. I didn't. That doesn't make
Speaker 1: it sexual if it's just breast milk, right, just get
Speaker 1: a little bit, let me taste it. I can't. That's
Speaker 1: how it works, I thought. I thought, No, I have to,
Speaker 1: like you think, she just could just you and it
Speaker 1: takes a while to turn on unless we started having sex,
Speaker 1: and then then it just does its own thing, turn
Speaker 1: on like it would be like a slow It's like
Speaker 1: a faucet, like you know, you heard it on Its
Speaker 1: cold water for a long. It's just air for a bit,
Speaker 1: so even if the baby latches on, it's like a
Speaker 1: minute of air and then it's sprays all over the
Speaker 1: place like a carnival game, and then it goes to
Speaker 1: one single stream. So it's a process. Yeah. Why I
Speaker 1: feel like I thought another world. I did not even
Speaker 1: know that. Yeah, I didn't know. I didn't know either
Speaker 1: to be during pregnancy. How was your sex drive? Hi?
Speaker 1: You have double the blood volume? I had more orgasms.
Speaker 1: My orgasms were faster and more intense, and I think
Speaker 1: I got more sensation in my vagina, which I never
Speaker 1: really had that much before. So I benefited from it.
Speaker 1: But you, Jared hated and you got it always come
Speaker 1: to you next. Jared hated pregnancy sex. So it is
Speaker 1: a very strong word. Why was it? Did you feel
Speaker 1: like you're gonna hurt her? Um? Well, you feel like
Speaker 1: I was gonna get a dimple from your not not
Speaker 1: that like so there. So the first time we had
Speaker 1: sex when she U was pregnant, I couldn't get it
Speaker 1: up because there was like this feeling of the child
Speaker 1: is in the room. And then on top of that,
Speaker 1: like I got and the child was the size of
Speaker 1: a figured at the time, like if I were you
Speaker 1: and I would have felt like it was me not
Speaker 1: right aware Jared didn't want to three some with a baby,
Speaker 1: but your mind. And we talked about it right away
Speaker 1: like it wasn't like something that I was just like
Speaker 1: hiding or you know, and it was the only time
Speaker 1: that it happened. So then that happened, and then as
Speaker 1: you know, we progressed. Obviously the bigger that she got,
Speaker 1: like the sex changed, So it was just kind of
Speaker 1: like we were having it. It wasn't the sex wasn't
Speaker 1: about pleasure for us. It started becoming like we know
Speaker 1: that this, this will benefit the baby in the long run.
Speaker 1: Sex benefits. Yeah, yeah, releasing all of like stress release
Speaker 1: and to go to sleep and and then when you're
Speaker 1: closer to delivery, that actually helps the baby come out bad.
Speaker 1: I knew, but I didn't know the other one. So
Speaker 1: you're not one of the men that believed that pregnancy
Speaker 1: pussy is so much better than I'm pregnant pussy. It
Speaker 1: was great, but I think, like, um, it was this
Speaker 1: is a weird word to use, but it was fluffier,
Speaker 1: not a flow. That's not weird at all. I get it.
Speaker 1: The walls puffed out. I remember with siss Is like
Speaker 1: when she was ovulating. I can feel it in my
Speaker 1: hand a little more lovely. Oh, is that what it is.
Speaker 1: I'm actually new to the word fluffy. Yeah. I was
Speaker 1: about to say, did it feel swollen, because I'm definitely
Speaker 1: good word. I felt like, just feel different, but in
Speaker 1: a good way. Yeah, it swollen is a good word. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but fluffy is the word that Dr Peusche used. I
Speaker 1: think I use an Okay, take credit for that, we
Speaker 1: went to this doctor who does like Lady of Plastics,
Speaker 1: and she gave me something called the OH shot, which
Speaker 1: is something like the make sure. But she said, I've
Speaker 1: never heard this before, that I have a very fluffy hymen,
Speaker 1: that it's like a lot of tissue in there. I
Speaker 1: did not know that before. So now this vision got
Speaker 1: a pillow pussy. Everything perfect, Everything is perfect. I want
Speaker 1: to mart in front of each other, Yes, really in
Speaker 1: front of each other. Far. I can't believe that. Really
Speaker 1: you think I'm proper? Which is you know, yes, I
Speaker 1: don't think we all do. I mean, I don't think
Speaker 1: people think that about me. Do you what that I'm
Speaker 1: like proper? I think they kind of they can tell.
Speaker 1: That's I think maybe your I mean, I did not
Speaker 1: think you didn't fart. But I'm like, yeah, I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to be shady and start a little. No, I'm
Speaker 1: super gross. I'm a real gross person, that's for sure.
Speaker 1: We think I'm gross. No, you're not a gross person.
Speaker 1: Your body parts? So wait, how did the first part
Speaker 1: come out? Oh? I couldn't even tell you. I like
Speaker 1: talking about poop, like I you know what it is
Speaker 1: for me. I don't like secrets, Like even when he
Speaker 1: just said that, like he couldn't get it up and
Speaker 1: we talked about it immediately after. So it's not like
Speaker 1: we're living in a world of like pretending to be
Speaker 1: any delusion of delusion. Yeah, it's like, let's examine. We
Speaker 1: had a YouTube channel together for like thirty seconds. It
Speaker 1: was called the Examined Life. I think that's why we
Speaker 1: actually bonded and we transformed from buddies to something more
Speaker 1: is because we both realized we're people who wanted to
Speaker 1: talk about everything, and like, look at life, moll angles.
Speaker 1: What I also like about the two of you, And
Speaker 1: I mean even any couple listening, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of people assume when they tell their partner that they
Speaker 1: don't like something about them. I think there's actually a
Speaker 1: lot of fear and telling your partner you don't like
Speaker 1: something about them um off of maybe the fear of
Speaker 1: confrontation or leading to an argument or making their partner insecure.
Speaker 1: Now about that, and so was there something that left
Speaker 1: for you guys to be this open with each other,
Speaker 1: Like even the fact that you're saying like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: want to see you with someone and hey, I don't
Speaker 1: like that you make me want to try out this food.
Speaker 1: A lot of people can't tell their partners what they
Speaker 1: don't like about each other. I think it started. You know,
Speaker 1: the interesting thing about our relationship is that we started
Speaker 1: out as fun buddies. So there was in the beginning,
Speaker 1: our dynamic wasn't uh, there was no fear of losing
Speaker 1: the person. You know, does that please? I actually want
Speaker 1: to snap my finger, please get into this. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: in the beginning where they're like, I was able to
Speaker 1: put all of my all of me on the table
Speaker 1: and know that it's not going to be judged because
Speaker 1: it's not like a girlfriend, right, and you didn't care? Yeah,
Speaker 1: and if you did and you were the same, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Jared's younger than me. I wasn't sure if I'll be
Speaker 1: able to stay in our country much longer. Like, there
Speaker 1: was so much fuck it in what we shared in
Speaker 1: the beginning, and that I think benefited too, because we're
Speaker 1: never trying to make it anything more than what it
Speaker 1: was in the moment. I love that because it's also
Speaker 1: a lot of people don't assume that you could go
Speaker 1: from a friend to marriage. A lot like and I
Speaker 1: don't think a lot of people can. No, I don't either,
Speaker 1: but I think I give them too much of them.
Speaker 1: But also but no, this is the problem to what
Speaker 1: both of you guys are insinuating two is that when
Speaker 1: we date and we're actually looking for a life partner,
Speaker 1: we don't show up as our true selves. No, yeah,
Speaker 1: you show up on the selves that you think they're
Speaker 1: gonna like. The only thing is I will say not
Speaker 1: saying it like even over Like literally told me maybe
Speaker 1: the third time we had success, said something about having
Speaker 1: dinner again. He's like, yo, like I'm just letting you know,
Speaker 1: like I haven't had a girlfriend in a minute my life,
Speaker 1: selling for a girlfriend, don't want a girlfriend, and then
Speaker 1: two years to their families, all that living in Mexico,
Speaker 1: like it was a lot. And I think sometimes not
Speaker 1: even that men are um, I'm trying to find the word,
Speaker 1: not that they're lying, because I do believe when a
Speaker 1: man says what he wants or what he's looking for,
Speaker 1: you should believe him and listen to him. But I
Speaker 1: do think it's the no pressure because we are trying
Speaker 1: so hard on that first date or that second date,
Speaker 1: not even realizing it, just trying to make a good impression.
Speaker 1: Like that's what we do in a job interview. That's
Speaker 1: what we do on the first day, because that's really
Speaker 1: what it is. And when you meet someone and it's
Speaker 1: that no frill ship, you get to know they're really true,
Speaker 1: like that's your friends. But the truth of the the matter
Speaker 1: is that's not like we're saying it like this, but
Speaker 1: there's so many times and jaredy also to say to him,
Speaker 1: if you knew this about me before, would be would
Speaker 1: we be together? He's like absolutely, not really being super needy,
Speaker 1: being very corny, like making jokes that he's in front
Speaker 1: of funny. I think I'd like to annoy you a lot. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that one thing about that I will say, like
Speaker 1: her version of flirting is like trying to piss me
Speaker 1: off or you what, Like it's just really bad jokes. No,
Speaker 1: it's like like I don't know how to explain it,
Speaker 1: but like it's like you don't want to like nagging,
Speaker 1: like I'm poking you. A lot of parts I tucked
Speaker 1: away neatly because I was aware that I had to
Speaker 1: wait until there was like some involvement in commitment to
Speaker 1: be like this is who I truly am socially, and
Speaker 1: instead of saying you look really good, you'll be like,
Speaker 1: the hell you got all? She's really known as compliment,
Speaker 1: you know. But I think at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: the reason why I said, I'm not saying that not
Speaker 1: everyone could do it because I'm like, we're something special.
Speaker 1: I was really anal about maintaining the fun buddy relationship
Speaker 1: and creating very clear boundaries because I was aware of
Speaker 1: myself when would get me caught up and also my
Speaker 1: biology naturally, so we only created relationships and revealed parts
Speaker 1: of ourselves that fit with what we were at the time.
Speaker 1: I never overinvested in him ever, So I never did
Speaker 1: anything that made me feel like I'm trying to get
Speaker 1: you know something that really great point because a lot
Speaker 1: of people are trying to like cook to coop do
Speaker 1: this stuff so they can get you to be theres
Speaker 1: So who who wanted to take the fun buddy relationship beyond?
Speaker 1: He was like that fluffy pussy got me, Jared, Yes,
Speaker 1: it was you. You were the first person to say
Speaker 1: I love you. Yeah, Yeah, he's so sweet. I love it.
Speaker 1: She's like a yeah, so guys, I had to pe no,
Speaker 1: they ain't gotta know that that's we edited. No, but
Speaker 1: they might stay it on the video and it's a
Speaker 1: it was like a pregnancy p You're like, you look
Speaker 1: different now you look different afterp do you? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, well, my friends is pregnant, maybe having
Speaker 1: to pee, like it's gonna come out right now. Like
Speaker 1: I had a friend pulled the car over. Yeah I
Speaker 1: can see that, and I was like, girl, are you
Speaker 1: like we were in New York? Bro? Yeah, yeah, pushing
Speaker 1: it gets like that. I get it. If you girl
Speaker 1: a pe on yourself before you p and these on
Speaker 1: twentieth and sucking lex Oh, ain't you I used to
Speaker 1: Papa squad anywhere? Yeah, I don't want when No, New
Speaker 1: York won't let you use the bathroom unless you're a
Speaker 1: customer Starbucks. Don't be like you gotta have a key
Speaker 1: and 't receive. No, I'm just gonna pop a squat
Speaker 1: well speak speak, You squatted and the whole baby came
Speaker 1: out of you. Um, now that the baby is here,
Speaker 1: how is your sex life now? It's been affected? It's
Speaker 1: hold on. That's a big work. That's that's positive. Uh,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's tough. Like the stage that she's at
Speaker 1: right now is so much attention, so much like you know, involvement,
Speaker 1: and so we barely get time to just be with us,
Speaker 1: but we still find times like we had sex in
Speaker 1: the closet. It's actually storage room sex, yeah, she does
Speaker 1: room with us closet sex. Yeah, So like while y'all
Speaker 1: are getting ready or like let's do it time that
Speaker 1: there are always people at our house all as people,
Speaker 1: so are windows of time of being alone and so
Speaker 1: very very short. So when we do have like storage
Speaker 1: room sex, it's when there's people upstairs. So it's a
Speaker 1: limited amount of time that we have. Actually, in many
Speaker 1: ways actually enjoy it more though, because I think before
Speaker 1: you just you and me for so long there and
Speaker 1: we work together, so there's like a constant opportunity to
Speaker 1: be having sex, which kind of makes it less special
Speaker 1: in many ways, Whereas now, like we're on this trip together,
Speaker 1: we've had sex every day because it's like it's rare
Speaker 1: to have that time. But also when we do have
Speaker 1: sex or have those moments, I don't have to like
Speaker 1: work up the drive or the desire like it's been
Speaker 1: in me all these exchanges constantly like building it up,
Speaker 1: So I think that it actually has made the sex better.
Speaker 1: I don't think I've had bad sex with you in
Speaker 1: a long time. Yeah, And when I say it affected,
Speaker 1: it wasn't. The sex itself is out time and when
Speaker 1: you can also for sure, I mean like when we
Speaker 1: first got together, we never never not had sex, you know,
Speaker 1: two times in a row day we saw each other,
Speaker 1: and then we within together and we had sex every
Speaker 1: single day for a year, and then the next year
Speaker 1: it was like maybe you know, six times a week,
Speaker 1: and then the next year it was like maybe three
Speaker 1: times a week, and then the next year and then
Speaker 1: now we're probably at like how many years have been together,
Speaker 1: twoft and now you're at what once or twice a week? Yeah,
Speaker 1: And that hasn't affected either of you because clearly both
Speaker 1: of you didn't have really high sex drives. Has age
Speaker 1: and life slowed that down or do you still have
Speaker 1: that sex drive just not enough time. It's still the
Speaker 1: same sex drive, just not enough time. And I think
Speaker 1: you know, with age comes understanding, So there's like a
Speaker 1: part of it that's like I understand that this is
Speaker 1: just the process that we're going through now. It doesn't
Speaker 1: mean that we won't get back there. But I will say,
Speaker 1: like like we did a video we talked about this
Speaker 1: where people were like kind of upsetting the comments about it,
Speaker 1: but we said that we never turn each other down,
Speaker 1: Like if he comes on to me no matter what,
Speaker 1: if I want to or I don't, I don't ever
Speaker 1: turn him down. Well, it looks like it makes it
Speaker 1: seem like like like like, I mean, if you have
Speaker 1: a partner, schedules, bro like to remind each other, and
Speaker 1: I think that not turning each other down is a
Speaker 1: great commitment. Well, if you have a partner who's going
Speaker 1: to be like, I don't care. If you're having the
Speaker 1: worst day ever and you're on your period and you're
Speaker 1: on your side in so much pain you're sucking meat,
Speaker 1: then that's a terrible rule. But I don't have that
Speaker 1: kind of partner, so I don't know. I was about
Speaker 1: to say, it's definitely subjective to the relationship only because
Speaker 1: like I do believe that you should be able to
Speaker 1: tell your partner no the same way you could tell
Speaker 1: an unwanted person or person essentral park. Yeah, like you
Speaker 1: can always tell someone else, So I do get why
Speaker 1: it would get pushed back. But again, I think it's
Speaker 1: subjective to the type of relationship you have, Like my
Speaker 1: partner now or did was x whatever I heard about
Speaker 1: it because I'm single but I'm not, but I am
Speaker 1: I it's a hot girl summer um. Um, Like, I
Speaker 1: don't do period sex. And I know that there's a
Speaker 1: lot of men they're like, I run red lights and
Speaker 1: for me that's a that's a no. It's a hard no.
Speaker 1: And so even if you're as horny as you are,
Speaker 1: that is one thing that I'm sorry, I'm not interested
Speaker 1: in it, and so to me, I should be able
Speaker 1: to say that without like another one like yeah, just
Speaker 1: some period bled no blo. Um. I have courage. It
Speaker 1: takes okay, not courage your body, courage and bravery. That
Speaker 1: that should be the title. Little all right, before we
Speaker 1: get out of here, let's get really quick to the
Speaker 1: whole mail. It's called unchanged this hole, um, and I
Speaker 1: want you guys to help us as well with the
Speaker 1: advice for this. I'm twenty six and I got married
Speaker 1: almost three years ago to my currently thirty four year
Speaker 1: old husband after being together for almost six years. Since
Speaker 1: about our relationship hasn't been in a great place. However,
Speaker 1: I remain optimistic in hopes that we would get through
Speaker 1: it kind of similar what you just said. The major
Speaker 1: issue in our relationship has actually been money ever since,
Speaker 1: my husband hasn't really been a strong financially provider of
Speaker 1: the house. This is mainly due to his need of
Speaker 1: pursuing a creative career and not wanting to work for
Speaker 1: the man anymore. Well I supported this man, Listen, Well,
Speaker 1: I've supported this man through two failed dreams, and now
Speaker 1: he is on number three and I know I don't
Speaker 1: have the emotional, mental, or financial resources to continue to
Speaker 1: support him. After listening to your podcast and hearing the
Speaker 1: variety of perspectives from some of your previous guests, I
Speaker 1: have finally come to accept that my marriage is possibly
Speaker 1: a failure. I now know that it isn't that I
Speaker 1: want one moment all on Oh. I now know what
Speaker 1: it is that I want from a partner, and my
Speaker 1: husband isn't cutting it. I'm ready to be unchained and
Speaker 1: go out into the world and live my whole home
Speaker 1: ass life. My question for you, ladies and guests is
Speaker 1: how do I go about telling my husband that I
Speaker 1: want a divorce. We don't have any kids, we don't
Speaker 1: at Anna say, how about go out there and have
Speaker 1: the summer like this is all happened? You know she
Speaker 1: wants to know how she comes to her partner says
Speaker 1: that she says that they don't have any kids, so
Speaker 1: no worries about that, but she does currently have four
Speaker 1: months left on the lease, and she's worried that she
Speaker 1: if she tells him too soon, she'll be left to
Speaker 1: support a home by herself. You are not worried about too,
Speaker 1: And she said she said at the moment, she can't
Speaker 1: support the home by herself. So that's why she really mean,
Speaker 1: since he can't and she can't. I think that they're
Speaker 1: both now stuck in a relationship because they are both financially.
Speaker 1: I just noticed that you're wearing orange. You're on the
Speaker 1: orange mike. You're wearing green, You're on the green mike.
Speaker 1: I think telling your husband that you want to get
Speaker 1: a divorce, if you haven't tried to work at it,
Speaker 1: might be kind of a shitty thing to do. It
Speaker 1: sounds like they've tried it, sounds she's been Um. If
Speaker 1: you're concerned about the time frame, um, fake it till
Speaker 1: you get you about sixty days? Right? Is she per
Speaker 1: to keep them cheaper to keep her like? That's what
Speaker 1: they say, like and you need a playing girl. But
Speaker 1: divorce is also takes some time, right, Yeah, but like
Speaker 1: imagine if someone told you that, well, it takes a
Speaker 1: year being separated and not living together. So in effect,
Speaker 1: you have to dissolve the relationship for a year and
Speaker 1: then you can file for a divorce. But I still
Speaker 1: have to make the you have to file separation first. Yes, really,
Speaker 1: and I didn't file the separation very safe. I'm pretty
Speaker 1: you have to be separated for a year before you
Speaker 1: can file for divorce. And now I'm not even quite
Speaker 1: sure because you're so shocked that I don't know. Ye,
Speaker 1: like people be like, I'm yeah, but no, it's I
Speaker 1: definitely know. It takes time. It does. It takes a
Speaker 1: lot of time because it's like there's like pepperwork that
Speaker 1: has to be signed on both ends, and sometimes if
Speaker 1: there's one partner who doesn't want it, they take forever
Speaker 1: to sign it. They don't sign it, they throw it away.
Speaker 1: They that's the TV. Let's say. I think even outside
Speaker 1: of marriage, this has been a constant um struggle for
Speaker 1: a lot of relationships, especially during covid um. People wanting
Speaker 1: to separate, but now they both know they need each
Speaker 1: other because they live together, and how do I pay
Speaker 1: bills by myself without my partner during this crisis. So
Speaker 1: you know what is it takes so much mental energy
Speaker 1: to maintain an unhealthy relationship that doesn't bring you joy.
Speaker 1: You'd be surprised at how much more productive you can
Speaker 1: be outside of that partnership. So you're looking at it
Speaker 1: now like the version of you that exists today can't
Speaker 1: afford to live alone. But the version of you when
Speaker 1: you free yourself from this connection that is draining you
Speaker 1: and dragging you down, probably can make it work and
Speaker 1: figure it out. Um, I can say that I went
Speaker 1: from making twelve thousand a year to what we make
Speaker 1: now as a result of a positive partnership. But even
Speaker 1: just living alone and getting away from my toxic X,
Speaker 1: it was just a day night version. It just it
Speaker 1: takes a lot of brain power to manage an unsuccessful,
Speaker 1: unhealthy relationship, So get out of that. Prioritize that over
Speaker 1: finances is I would give that advice a thousand per
Speaker 1: cent across the board. I also think the coolest thing
Speaker 1: someone said to me about marriage is that marriage is
Speaker 1: the only thing that we do where we celebrate the intent.
Speaker 1: Like in university, you celebrate the completion, right, that's the
Speaker 1: graduation marriage is like we're intending to give this a try.
Speaker 1: We're celebrating the intent. It's okay if that intention doesn't
Speaker 1: work out. And even she said someone said the word
Speaker 1: failure or she surrot my Malian marriage is a failure. No, no,
Speaker 1: it's the opposite. It's like if you're a party, Yeah,
Speaker 1: the party is over. It was a success, but now
Speaker 1: everyone can go home, like if we have done what
Speaker 1: we came together to do. Maybe we didn't make forever,
Speaker 1: but we accomplished whatever we did in these years, and
Speaker 1: I want to call it right now while we're ahead
Speaker 1: and say this was great for what it was. It
Speaker 1: was a successful marriage, But now I want to move
Speaker 1: on to other successful ventures. Like no, yeah, I would say, um,
Speaker 1: just just pull that trigger as soon as possible, um,
Speaker 1: because I find that if you start to find different
Speaker 1: excuses on why you're not gonna pull it, maybe when
Speaker 1: you come down to that sixty day mark, you're gonna
Speaker 1: be like maybe should I Or there's gonna be one
Speaker 1: other thing that's going to hold you back from pulling
Speaker 1: that trigger. So I'd say you just do it and
Speaker 1: uh and see what happens. You only live once and
Speaker 1: you pro divorce so that I love that about Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love that. So divorce Actually, yeah, I think that
Speaker 1: that's also good thing to be now because it seems like,
Speaker 1: oh like, we're gonna make this work, and if it's
Speaker 1: not gonna work, we're not gonna sit in here and
Speaker 1: be unhappy. There's so many marriages where they stay because
Speaker 1: there's in divorce. There's a whole other version of content
Speaker 1: I can create around divorce. So anyway, right here we
Speaker 1: speaking of content. Where can our listeners listen to the
Speaker 1: both of you and find content from y'all? You could
Speaker 1: find me. I don't know which one is like camera,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna look at one of these. I think
Speaker 1: this one right here, this middle one. Okay, you can
Speaker 1: find me enjoy the podcast or enjoy Jared Brady across
Speaker 1: all platforms, and uh yeah that's everywhere because oh hell
Speaker 1: yes kiss kiss. Oh oh well, there's per mention, the
Speaker 1: vibe I'm like to get out expect that out of
Speaker 1: You have a podcast coming out which we did an
Speaker 1: episode for today. We're going to be an episode by
Speaker 1: time probably airs October six, where all podcasts are available
Speaker 1: called Lovers and Friends. Congrats on your podcast A very
Speaker 1: long time coming. I know you had one that came
Speaker 1: out with your audiobook or something. I feel like, well,
Speaker 1: that's a audio book which also listened to that. Nice.
Speaker 1: We loved your but thank you so much. I appreciate
Speaker 1: another one. Thanks kiss yo. Looking looking at the chand like,
Speaker 1: are you serious? Right now? This will be the clip
Speaker 1: just so you know it's gonna go all over the internet. Look,
Speaker 1: you don't want to kiss him, first of all, I
Speaker 1: mean I'm not saying I want to turning red now,
Speaker 1: not the one who flirts with all the guests. And
Speaker 1: now I never had a guess with a husband. I
Speaker 1: was into. Well, now she's giving you permission to kiss them.
Speaker 1: Is this gonna be on like TV? Okay, let's not
Speaker 1: do it. It It feels like it's getting cool. It's all fine.
Speaker 1: You don't want to eat a guy. She's not doing
Speaker 1: that right now, I'm doing well. Guys, are gonna leave
Speaker 1: you with a five minute bonus clip from our patreon
Speaker 1: if you are all caught up for horrible decisions and
Speaker 1: want for us on the bonus clip. Oh we could,
Speaker 1: we could do it as a bonus thought. You know what,
Speaker 1: Come to our Patreon and you're gonna see Wheezy kiss
Speaker 1: Shan's husband. There, I'm putting it to the universe. Go
Speaker 1: on over and join us now at picture on dot
Speaker 1: Com backslash Horrible Decisions. We are there again. We leave me?
Speaker 1: What if I'm in a bow clip? And this has
Speaker 1: been another episode of Horrible Decisions. Hey guys, I've been
Speaker 1: listening to Horrible Decisions for a bit now, and I
Speaker 1: thought you might have some advice or could relate to
Speaker 1: the current problem that I have. First off, long story short,
Speaker 1: I recently, in the last two years, came out as By.
Speaker 1: It's been crazy trying to be true to myself because
Speaker 1: in my background, my mom was highly against the idea
Speaker 1: of a woman being with anyone else but a but
Speaker 1: a man. But when I came out is By, I
Speaker 1: started experimenting with threesomes, guys, girls, all that. And then
Speaker 1: one day I started realizing, I keep thinking about a
Speaker 1: threesome with two men who were either by or gay
Speaker 1: or whatever. I just wanted to try it, and I did,
Speaker 1: and I loved it. So now I'm into that a lot,
Speaker 1: and I never knew it before. Fast forward to last year,
Speaker 1: my X and I got back together. We've been on
Speaker 1: and off for seven years. I had no intention of
Speaker 1: going back after he was so upset about me coming
Speaker 1: out to him is by during the last time we
Speaker 1: broke up. But nevertheless, here we are. I do love him.
Speaker 1: Our sex has been amazing. I just wish he was
Speaker 1: more open to the idea of a threesome. Maybe I'm
Speaker 1: not even asking for him to try a threesome with
Speaker 1: another man. I know that's a far as stress stretch,
Speaker 1: but damn, can I watch you another girl? Can we
Speaker 1: fuck this girl together? I have needs. I can't deny
Speaker 1: my sexuality, and it's sad as hell, but I take
Speaker 1: it slow because I know I just should have been
Speaker 1: open from a jump, and I've always known I was
Speaker 1: into both. I was afraid because I was so shameful.
Speaker 1: My question is, do you think there are any ways
Speaker 1: I can introduce the idea successfully to have a threesome.
Speaker 1: I definitely don't want to just bring it up bluntly
Speaker 1: like I have in the past, because he'll probably think
Speaker 1: he's gonna have to compete with a woman. Um. Sorry,
Speaker 1: it's lengthy with the story needed context. Until I figured
Speaker 1: out I'll be watching porn. Of all the things I
Speaker 1: wish I could try, shall now see why you brought
Speaker 1: a shot on Patreon. I'm so sick of he'se goddamn,
Speaker 1: how do I get a threesome of My partner asked questions. No,
Speaker 1: this one's a little bit different because it's just she's
Speaker 1: just announcing that she's bisexual. So I think it's a
Speaker 1: reverse right. It's normally men trying to bring women in
Speaker 1: on a threesome. And I had a situation with hospital
Speaker 1: dick and with the Jesus dude I dated where they
Speaker 1: really felt like and believed that other women were just
Speaker 1: as bad as other men. In my head, fucked up.
Speaker 1: I have a sex podcast. I was like, but it's
Speaker 1: just a bit. I'm not trying to suck another nigga.
Speaker 1: And I will say this if there is any ladies
Speaker 1: listening to the podcast. I know we don't often talk
Speaker 1: about men saying no to threesomes, but I do believe,
Speaker 1: and both men that told me no have big dicks.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's a confiden it's issue. I truly
Speaker 1: believe it has to do with where someone feels like
Speaker 1: they stand with you. Hear me out. I don't think
Speaker 1: that men feel safe in threesomes unless they know who
Speaker 1: the funk they are to you, Like, I think there's
Speaker 1: a reason that people that go to swingers resorts have
Speaker 1: been together forever and they're oldest fuck Like, I don't
Speaker 1: think that, especially you being on and off seven years
Speaker 1: with someone introducing someone else into the bedroom makes sense
Speaker 1: when they don't even know what the funk they have
Speaker 1: going on with you. And maybe you could say he
Speaker 1: knows you well or whatever, but like on and off
Speaker 1: for seven years, on and off a lot, and it
Speaker 1: sounds like you're more off been on for a nigga
Speaker 1: did not know you've been by the whole time. And
Speaker 1: if you mean then that to me, is you coming
Speaker 1: from a completely emo place, because niggas are okay with
Speaker 1: threesomes before they know where you stand with them, like clearly,
Speaker 1: But I'm saying that I'm talking about in case where
Speaker 1: men don't your boyfriend a man I've had a threesome with,
Speaker 1: These aren't the men were talking about. We're talking about
Speaker 1: the men that aren't comfortable and where where it comes from?
Speaker 1: Maybe right, So I mean, That's where I'm putting my
Speaker 1: input in. And I know we can all talk about
Speaker 1: men we funk that I've had a recent with, but
Speaker 1: I'm curious to know what y'all think as far as
Speaker 1: a man who is not not a man who is,
Speaker 1: but a man who's not. I mean, I just think
Speaker 1: it could come from a lot more deeper rooted things, uh,
Speaker 1: such as religion, such as their views on sexuality. Um,
Speaker 1: because I mean, I did have someone early on that
Speaker 1: I was talking to and well, this wasn't recent at all.
Speaker 1: You know who I'm talking about, but he actually did
Speaker 1: not like the fact that I liked other women and
Speaker 1: didn't feel like he would ever really care for me
Speaker 1: to be with another woman, and came to me like,
Speaker 1: if I feel like you have to bring in another
Speaker 1: woman to the bedroom or that you want to play
Speaker 1: with women, it's because you don't feel fully satisfied with me.
Speaker 1: And so I think that outside of religion, outside of
Speaker 1: what the relationship is, a man could have some insecurities
Speaker 1: if you want to bring someone in the room at all, like,
Speaker 1: and I think that that's really where a lot of
Speaker 1: that stems from. It's more so him a man feeling
Speaker 1: inadequate to please you fully and that's why you're seeking
Speaker 1: someone else. Yeah, there's article I read because when you
Speaker 1: try to like search advice about this. It's all about
Speaker 1: women asking my boyfriend wants to have a threesome, what
Speaker 1: do I do. There's this article on bold dot com.
Speaker 1: It's Bold with the Apian and it says, my boyfriend
Speaker 1: and I try to have a threesome and it destroyed us.
Speaker 1: And there's something really interesting about this. She says. At first,
Speaker 1: I was freaked out. It was moving so fast. Maybe
Speaker 1: I should have told him I was nervous, but I
Speaker 1: just wanted to be spontaneous. And see, I feel like
Speaker 1: if someone is telling you know before it's even happening,
Speaker 1: like this is a blessing in disguise. Threesomes can end
Speaker 1: so badly if you all don't know where you stand.
Speaker 1: And I think that, honestly, it's better left undone than
Speaker 1: trying to fund someone else with someone that doesn't want
Speaker 1: to do it. Like, you know, we hear about men
Speaker 1: kind of core sing women into threesomes so much, and
Speaker 1: I think that as women, we've got to really respect
Speaker 1: fucking boundaries. And if you've got to fund someone else
Speaker 1: that bad and you're that your kinks are that important,
Speaker 1: then girl in the game, you