WEBVTT - Sucky Daters Helpline with Olivia Caridi

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<v Speaker 1>Hell I Suck at Dating with De Nungler and Dared

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<v Speaker 1>Haven and I heard radio podcast. Hey, welcome back to

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<v Speaker 1>an all new episode of Help I Suck a Dating

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<v Speaker 1>Caller Edition. Olivia is back because she's gonna give way

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<v Speaker 1>better advice than myself. Then we have our callers calling

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<v Speaker 1>into the podcast. Our first one is here. His name

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<v Speaker 1>is Walker. Walker. How you doing, buddy, I'm good, I'm good.

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<v Speaker 1>How are you doing well? So what's going on? Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>So I I recently, Um, you know, I started seeing

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<v Speaker 1>this girl and uh, you know, everything's great. She's like awesome,

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<v Speaker 1>like really awesome, except a couple of weeks and she

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<v Speaker 1>she tells me that she's got this this best friend

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<v Speaker 1>who likes her, and uh she you know, she like

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<v Speaker 1>swears that there's no feelings for him or anything. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>but he always wants to call and face time and

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<v Speaker 1>and uh you know, even when I'm with her, and

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<v Speaker 1>he wants to hang out with her, and so sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like hanging out with her and the dude who's

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<v Speaker 1>got a crush on her. Uh you know, I told

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<v Speaker 1>her was disrespectful and like we live like an hour

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<v Speaker 1>away from each other, so I'm not trying to drive

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<v Speaker 1>an hour to go and find go and hang out

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<v Speaker 1>with some guy who's like trying to like be with her.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know, Am I being unreasonable? She? She says,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm I'm I'm being insecure and that you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>just need to to get over it. But he, I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know. He feels shady to me. Yeah, I feel

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<v Speaker 1>shady to me too, my friend. UM, so my question is,

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<v Speaker 1>does she know that he has a crush on her?

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<v Speaker 1>Like that's confirmed? This guy is definitely into her. I

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<v Speaker 1>mean not, I mean, he hasn't come out and directly

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<v Speaker 1>said it, but it's like it just feels like something

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<v Speaker 1>like you don't do that if you aren't into someone, right,

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<v Speaker 1>Like I don't. I don't face time with with all

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<v Speaker 1>these random people who yeah, you know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 1>It's it just feels it's like it's intimate and it

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<v Speaker 1>feels like he wants to be intimate with her and

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<v Speaker 1>we're trying to start something and I'm enjoying it. But

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<v Speaker 1>it just feels like I don't know. She says, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>being I'm being crazy, and I think I'm just I

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<v Speaker 1>don't want to say she has to choose one or

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<v Speaker 1>the other, but it just feels like, I don't know,

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<v Speaker 1>it feels it feels weird to me. I'm curious, like

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<v Speaker 1>when they talk, how long do they talk? And like

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<v Speaker 1>what do they talk about? I mean they talk about,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, just just stuff that you you normally talk

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<v Speaker 1>about with like your boyfriend or girlfriend. It's like, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>even stuff like this' innocuous, like how is your day

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<v Speaker 1>and like tell me about it? Oh, you know, like

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<v Speaker 1>tell me more? And you know really like do they

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<v Speaker 1>talk every day? Every day? There? It? Yeah, that's a lot.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, so how long are they like best friends? Though?

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<v Speaker 1>My question to you is maybe there is nothing there

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<v Speaker 1>and maybe they are just best friends. Because if they're

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<v Speaker 1>all if you're hanging out together, is this guy like

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<v Speaker 1>throwing you shade? Or is he coming off as like

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<v Speaker 1>just like a best friend? Because here's the thing. I

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<v Speaker 1>I'm usually not down for like very close friends with

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<v Speaker 1>with the other sex if you are attracted to them,

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<v Speaker 1>because it usually leads to problems. But having said that,

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<v Speaker 1>if the person is like your sister, then I don't know,

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<v Speaker 1>then that's fine. Like I have a friend that's one

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<v Speaker 1>of my best friends and she's a girl, and like

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<v Speaker 1>it was total like brother sister relationship to the point where,

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<v Speaker 1>like I remember Ashley being weird, not being weird about it,

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<v Speaker 1>but before meeting her, I was like, how are you

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<v Speaker 1>guys like so close and you guys don't date or

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<v Speaker 1>anything like that. I'm like, no, you have to. You

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<v Speaker 1>have to hang out with us and experience what our

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<v Speaker 1>relationship is. And then she did and she's like, oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you guys are siblings, and I was like, yeah, pretty much.

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<v Speaker 1>So that's my question. But if this, I mean, if

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<v Speaker 1>if it's clear to day that this guy likes her

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<v Speaker 1>AND's like crushing on her, then yeah, that's a red flag.

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<v Speaker 1>You need to talk to your your significant other and say, listen,

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<v Speaker 1>it's clear that this guy likes you. He's up to

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<v Speaker 1>no good. I know you're friends with him, but like,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not feeling comfortable with this scenario, especially if they

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<v Speaker 1>hang out without you. My piece of advice would potentially

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<v Speaker 1>it seems like if you talk to her about this,

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<v Speaker 1>you're bringing up more of like the romantic thing, like

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<v Speaker 1>he likes you, are you sure you don't like him?

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<v Speaker 1>Like maybe the way I would do it would be

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<v Speaker 1>rephrasing it as I'm having a great time getting to

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<v Speaker 1>know you, but the fact that you're on the phone

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<v Speaker 1>like every day with this person and like bringing this

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<v Speaker 1>person around outside of just the fact that you think

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<v Speaker 1>they like each other, but more of just how their conversation.

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<v Speaker 1>Like the way that she's just bringing people around. It's

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<v Speaker 1>frustrating for me in like the beginning of a relationship

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<v Speaker 1>or whatever. Like she's obviously getting defensive about like the

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<v Speaker 1>romantic you know, calling you crazy or insecure, whatever. But

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<v Speaker 1>you could just say, like I don't want to date

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<v Speaker 1>someone that is on the phone face timing with someone

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<v Speaker 1>every day. That's like not me, you know, like it's

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<v Speaker 1>I don't talk to anyone any every day on the

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<v Speaker 1>phone ever mm hm. So I don't know, that might

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<v Speaker 1>be a way to like avoid the kind of tension

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<v Speaker 1>that comes obviously from that defensiveness and just pin it

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<v Speaker 1>more on like this is what I need out of someone.

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<v Speaker 1>I want someone to be present with me, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>when they're with me. We live an hour away, so

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<v Speaker 1>like when we're together, I want to make sure that no,

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<v Speaker 1>you're not on the phone with other people, that you're

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<v Speaker 1>you're with me, You have a loane time, make it

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<v Speaker 1>more about what you need. Mm hm. That's my advice. No,

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<v Speaker 1>that's good advice. Yeah, I'll definitely and I'm fine with

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<v Speaker 1>them being friends. It's just like, if I'm going to

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<v Speaker 1>take the time to come come over, I don't want

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<v Speaker 1>to have to share you then introduce it as that,

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<v Speaker 1>Like I like you so much, we live our parts,

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<v Speaker 1>so when we do spend time together, it's really important

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<v Speaker 1>to me to have like alone one on one time

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<v Speaker 1>uninterrupted with not face times and stuff and relation share Like,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm enjoying getting to know you, but this is something

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<v Speaker 1>that's like proving to be difficult for me in terms

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<v Speaker 1>of just the are togetherness. You know, when I do

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<v Speaker 1>take the time to drive an hour, you take the

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<v Speaker 1>time to drive an hour. Yeah, I don't know how

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<v Speaker 1>you feel about that, Jared, No, I would agree. I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>just make it about yourself. Make it about you, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>and not so much the other person, because I think

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<v Speaker 1>that will come awf a lot better. Yeah, because if

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<v Speaker 1>you do make it about the other person, it becomes accusatory,

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<v Speaker 1>where if you make it about yourself, you're just talking

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<v Speaker 1>about your own emotions and feelings. So Walker, thank you

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<v Speaker 1>so much, man, I hope that helps. Good luck with everything.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you, appreciate it. Our next caller, Uh, we're dealing

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<v Speaker 1>up on the line is Ashlyn Ashley. You're there, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm here, Hey Ashly, welcome to the podcast. Hi, how

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<v Speaker 1>are you good? I made it? I did it, well done?

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<v Speaker 1>So how can we help you? What's going on? So?

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<v Speaker 1>I wanted to talk to you guys about my boyfriend. Okay, Um,

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<v Speaker 1>my boyfriend and I are in our late twenties and

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<v Speaker 1>we've been dating for almost einer Um, am I wrong

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<v Speaker 1>to be frustrated that we always pay separate and he

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<v Speaker 1>never offers to pay for me. I really, well, let

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<v Speaker 1>me just plain. I really don't know if things will

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<v Speaker 1>change one times better job, but um, I've always wanted

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<v Speaker 1>the guy who won to treat me at times and

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<v Speaker 1>pay for me. Curious, like when you started dating? Was

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<v Speaker 1>it that way still like early on? Was? No, it

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't like that early on. But you know, he's been

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<v Speaker 1>having a hard time it worked, and you know, so

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<v Speaker 1>I know that he's been having a problems finding a

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<v Speaker 1>job that pays him more and everything. Well, I guess

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<v Speaker 1>so your biggest concern is that he might not be

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<v Speaker 1>able to provide exactly. Yes, And and actually I've I've

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<v Speaker 1>actually hinted it at it before and brought it up,

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<v Speaker 1>and so I know that, Um, I understand how how

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<v Speaker 1>he understands how I feel that this is going way

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<v Speaker 1>back to like when we were in school. Um, and

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<v Speaker 1>I know that he was trying to find a better

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<v Speaker 1>paying job so he can be able to provide for

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<v Speaker 1>our family one day. But um, and after that he

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<v Speaker 1>offered to pay for a few times for me a

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<v Speaker 1>few times, but I didn't let it because I knew

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<v Speaker 1>the struggle that of his situation was that he was

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<v Speaker 1>then already so um. The thing is what I'm wondering

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<v Speaker 1>is because he'll spend money on himself all the time,

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<v Speaker 1>but when it comes to like I tend to have

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<v Speaker 1>the meal for me, he asked for us to pay separately,

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<v Speaker 1>And of course I say yet because since I because

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<v Speaker 1>I think that's what he wants me to do, is

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<v Speaker 1>to pay separately since it's like a low amount. But

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<v Speaker 1>I just really wish that we could take turns pain

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<v Speaker 1>because it's really so unromantic and unlike a date. In fact,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm embarrassed after that to act like a couple when

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<v Speaker 1>we pay separately, because we're kind of separate everything else

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<v Speaker 1>in a relationship is fine, but this continues to just

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<v Speaker 1>be the most massive turn off for me. And that's

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<v Speaker 1>what I'm helping Olivia. What are your thoughts. That's tough,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's something that would bother me too. Um. It

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't have to be every time, but I do think

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<v Speaker 1>that there's something if we're talking about relationships where like

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<v Speaker 1>you continue to feel like you're dating and like you

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<v Speaker 1>never forget the romance of it. To me, something romantic,

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<v Speaker 1>even if it's just you know, once or twice, like

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<v Speaker 1>every like cover it be like I got this girl.

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<v Speaker 1>You know. That's something that to me feels romantic. Um. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it's putting effort into it. Yeah, and it doesn't have

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<v Speaker 1>to be all the time. It's just like that extra

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<v Speaker 1>bit of like let me take care of you, which

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<v Speaker 1>you know I'm in many ways, I'm like an independent woman,

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<v Speaker 1>but there are those little things that's like I want

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<v Speaker 1>to be taken care of. I wanna of course, so

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<v Speaker 1>that would bother me too, and I'm thinking of what

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<v Speaker 1>I would do about it. Sared, do you have thoughts

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<v Speaker 1>from the male perspective? Yeah, I mean, of course, the

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<v Speaker 1>biggest thing you do is just talk to him and

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<v Speaker 1>try to present it in a delicate manner because I

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<v Speaker 1>know guys, because I am a guy, and uh, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>we can get pretty insecure about finances and um, so

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<v Speaker 1>if you come at it in a manner of, hey, listen,

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<v Speaker 1>I want you to either start making more money or

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<v Speaker 1>paying for things for me and stop spending on you again,

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<v Speaker 1>I think that's going to really come off that well,

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<v Speaker 1>and it just might start an argument. But if you

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<v Speaker 1>talk about your emotions like Olivia has stayed in the

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<v Speaker 1>past with a previous call, or where you talk about

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<v Speaker 1>how it makes you feel and about how you want

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<v Speaker 1>to feel, uh, you know, sometimes like hey, listen, I

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<v Speaker 1>want to kind of relive our initial spark and and um,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, have some romance time, and you know, I'd

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<v Speaker 1>like for you to take me out on a date.

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<v Speaker 1>And I would hope that would you know, click in

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<v Speaker 1>his mind that hey, taking you on a date includes

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<v Speaker 1>paying for the date. O, my god, thank you so much.

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<v Speaker 1>What I've always learned in life is that men and

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<v Speaker 1>like people can't read minds right. Like you could let

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<v Speaker 1>something annoy you that your partner doesn't even see or realize,

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<v Speaker 1>and you're you're churning on it, and they're just like

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<v Speaker 1>living life, right, But if it's something that you continue

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<v Speaker 1>like stewing on, and it's like you have to bring

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<v Speaker 1>it up, and there are ways to do that, Like

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<v Speaker 1>do I think you should say I need you to

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<v Speaker 1>make more money and like make it into like a

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<v Speaker 1>bigger issue versus like kind of easing into that. Like

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<v Speaker 1>I think it's a great thing to say to a partner.

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<v Speaker 1>I love our relationship, but like you know, I want

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<v Speaker 1>to make sure it's still spicy. I want to make

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<v Speaker 1>sure that we never forget the romance of it. So

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<v Speaker 1>I would love it if I don't know, once or

0:12:32.840 --> 0:12:35.440
<v Speaker 1>twice a month or something, we went on a nice

0:12:35.520 --> 0:12:38.120
<v Speaker 1>date or even just like you covered one of my

0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:42.520
<v Speaker 1>dinners as like a a romantic move and then you know,

0:12:42.600 --> 0:12:44.960
<v Speaker 1>as you go, if that improves, then there could be

0:12:45.000 --> 0:12:49.560
<v Speaker 1>more conversations about like further finances. But I always recommend

0:12:49.640 --> 0:12:53.320
<v Speaker 1>not to like dive right into a serious topic versus

0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:57.200
<v Speaker 1>kind of let's see if it can improve, you know, naturally,

0:12:57.280 --> 0:12:59.959
<v Speaker 1>just by stating my needs as a as a part

0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:02.520
<v Speaker 1>now you know definitely will do that because what I

0:13:02.559 --> 0:13:05.240
<v Speaker 1>didn't do is what you guys said with the famed

0:13:05.600 --> 0:13:08.800
<v Speaker 1>I kind of still silly now because I never actually

0:13:08.800 --> 0:13:11.200
<v Speaker 1>came out and said I want, I need you to

0:13:11.240 --> 0:13:13.080
<v Speaker 1>pay for it, So that is no really good advice.

0:13:13.120 --> 0:13:16.640
<v Speaker 1>And definitely thank you so much. Of course, people are

0:13:16.679 --> 0:13:21.640
<v Speaker 1>not mine readers, never forget that people are not Thanks Ashlyn,

0:13:21.679 --> 0:13:35.920
<v Speaker 1>thanks for calling the podcast. Thank you so much. Fine,

0:13:37.480 --> 0:13:40.640
<v Speaker 1>All right, Our next caller is Luke. Hey, guys, how

0:13:40.640 --> 0:13:47.439
<v Speaker 1>are you good? Hey? Good? So my ex girlfriend uh

0:13:47.559 --> 0:13:53.320
<v Speaker 1>dumped me after about ten months of dating recently. Um, thanks,

0:13:53.360 --> 0:14:02.240
<v Speaker 1>but she wanted to remain friends. Yeah girls, okay, Um

0:14:02.280 --> 0:14:05.840
<v Speaker 1>about after a month she um, she got upset and

0:14:05.880 --> 0:14:08.200
<v Speaker 1>feels like I now don't want to be friends with

0:14:08.200 --> 0:14:11.359
<v Speaker 1>her and that I want space. But really, in reality,

0:14:11.720 --> 0:14:13.960
<v Speaker 1>all I've done is kind of put up boundaries, which

0:14:14.000 --> 0:14:16.679
<v Speaker 1>I think is healthy so I can move on. Told her,

0:14:16.720 --> 0:14:18.720
<v Speaker 1>you know, don't text me. I removed her from my

0:14:18.760 --> 0:14:23.960
<v Speaker 1>social media for my friends app um. And somehow she

0:14:24.000 --> 0:14:26.200
<v Speaker 1>has a problem with all this and that I'm now

0:14:26.280 --> 0:14:30.160
<v Speaker 1>being selfish. And to top it all off, she knows

0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:32.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm going out next Thursday and wants to know what

0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:35.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm doing, who I'm going out with all this stuff,

0:14:35.520 --> 0:14:38.200
<v Speaker 1>and I told her, look, I'm not comfortable sharing all

0:14:38.240 --> 0:14:41.200
<v Speaker 1>this stuff with you, and now she's upset, she's crying

0:14:41.200 --> 0:14:43.440
<v Speaker 1>and all that and feels like I don't want to

0:14:43.480 --> 0:14:46.440
<v Speaker 1>be friends, which is not really true. Also, she said

0:14:46.480 --> 0:14:48.560
<v Speaker 1>that I have to tell her if I go on

0:14:48.600 --> 0:14:51.440
<v Speaker 1>a date with someone now, so we can stop being friends.

0:14:52.400 --> 0:14:54.520
<v Speaker 1>I think she's a little controlling. I don't really feel

0:14:54.520 --> 0:14:56.960
<v Speaker 1>good about this. Yeah, why are you? Do you really

0:14:57.000 --> 0:15:00.640
<v Speaker 1>even want to be friends with her? Why are you? Yeah?

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:03.200
<v Speaker 1>I honestly no. I mean I was just being nice.

0:15:03.400 --> 0:15:06.720
<v Speaker 1>I thought like she just wanted to maybe have a

0:15:06.720 --> 0:15:09.240
<v Speaker 1>real friendship after dating for for for them, you know,

0:15:09.360 --> 0:15:11.160
<v Speaker 1>the amount of time we did. I think she's a

0:15:11.160 --> 0:15:14.040
<v Speaker 1>little controlling if she's wanting all this stuff, and you

0:15:14.080 --> 0:15:15.800
<v Speaker 1>know I don't. I don't like it. So I was

0:15:15.800 --> 0:15:18.200
<v Speaker 1>wondering what you guys think I should do. I mean,

0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:19.840
<v Speaker 1>was she being nice when she broke up with you?

0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:22.960
<v Speaker 1>Like she was just being truthful and that's okay, And

0:15:22.960 --> 0:15:24.840
<v Speaker 1>I think it's time for you to be truthful, saying listen,

0:15:24.920 --> 0:15:26.440
<v Speaker 1>I wanted to be in a relationship with you. It

0:15:26.480 --> 0:15:29.400
<v Speaker 1>didn't work out. I still have feelings for you, but

0:15:29.560 --> 0:15:31.400
<v Speaker 1>this is unhealthy for both of us to try to

0:15:31.440 --> 0:15:34.280
<v Speaker 1>be friends. I think it's best if we're putting boundaries up,

0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:37.200
<v Speaker 1>and we're not friends anymore. She seems pretty toxic for you,

0:15:37.280 --> 0:15:40.320
<v Speaker 1>if I'm being honest. Yeah, babe, I think you dodged respectfully.

0:15:40.360 --> 0:15:45.080
<v Speaker 1>You dodged a bullet number one, number two. Um. She

0:15:45.240 --> 0:15:48.640
<v Speaker 1>chose to end the relationship and therefore does not get

0:15:48.680 --> 0:15:54.480
<v Speaker 1>to dictate how she once said relationship you know, moving

0:15:54.520 --> 0:15:57.440
<v Speaker 1>forward to be like you know I would. I've broken

0:15:57.520 --> 0:15:59.800
<v Speaker 1>up with people, and the first thing I say is

0:16:00.120 --> 0:16:04.160
<v Speaker 1>if you need time space, great, I'll give it to you, Like,

0:16:05.040 --> 0:16:06.600
<v Speaker 1>let me know if you ever want to be friends,

0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:09.280
<v Speaker 1>because I adore you. Like. She has no right to

0:16:09.440 --> 0:16:14.080
<v Speaker 1>dictate how your relationship looks moving forward, um, or what

0:16:14.160 --> 0:16:16.760
<v Speaker 1>you do with your life like this whole needs to

0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:24.960
<v Speaker 1>know when you're dating thing is crazy, toxic, insane? Yeah, Like, yeah,

0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:26.720
<v Speaker 1>I don't. I'm feel good about it. I'll be honest

0:16:26.760 --> 0:16:31.320
<v Speaker 1>with you. I mean, I don't need to check in whatever. Nope,

0:16:31.840 --> 0:16:34.680
<v Speaker 1>your relationship is over. Your romantic relationship is over. So

0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:39.800
<v Speaker 1>your duty eat in romantic sense, to keep her posted

0:16:39.840 --> 0:16:42.360
<v Speaker 1>and know what you're like. That doesn't exist anymore. And

0:16:42.400 --> 0:16:45.720
<v Speaker 1>that was her decision. Um, And so now you have

0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:48.080
<v Speaker 1>to ask yourself, why do I even want to be

0:16:48.200 --> 0:16:53.760
<v Speaker 1>friends with this person, and too if I do, am

0:16:53.760 --> 0:16:55.920
<v Speaker 1>I willing to like? And you should go out on

0:16:55.920 --> 0:16:58.080
<v Speaker 1>a limb and be like, these are my boundaries. I'm not,

0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:01.200
<v Speaker 1>I am not I I'm not required to tell you

0:17:01.400 --> 0:17:05.000
<v Speaker 1>about any days I'm going on. You know, like, damn,

0:17:05.119 --> 0:17:07.359
<v Speaker 1>this is what's going to happen if if we are

0:17:07.400 --> 0:17:10.920
<v Speaker 1>going to be friends somehow, like these are the things

0:17:10.960 --> 0:17:16.640
<v Speaker 1>that are not going to happen from you moving forward. Um, yeah,

0:17:16.720 --> 0:17:18.840
<v Speaker 1>question one, do you need this person in your way?

0:17:19.200 --> 0:17:22.560
<v Speaker 1>I don't know that's a good question to ask. Yeah,

0:17:22.600 --> 0:17:24.160
<v Speaker 1>I don't think I do. I mean, she really hurt

0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:26.400
<v Speaker 1>me when she broke up with me, and and now

0:17:26.440 --> 0:17:29.120
<v Speaker 1>it's like she's she wants me to like latch on

0:17:29.240 --> 0:17:31.960
<v Speaker 1>or like giving character dangles just to kind of keep

0:17:32.000 --> 0:17:34.560
<v Speaker 1>me in arm's reach. And that's not fair. That's no,

0:17:34.680 --> 0:17:36.480
<v Speaker 1>it's not fair for me. You have to do what's

0:17:36.480 --> 0:17:39.399
<v Speaker 1>best for you to move forward, and like to seriously

0:17:39.440 --> 0:17:42.760
<v Speaker 1>move forward. And I have excess that I am friends with,

0:17:42.880 --> 0:17:46.200
<v Speaker 1>but it took time, like we didn't talk right away,

0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:49.320
<v Speaker 1>like we did what we had to do to be

0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:53.000
<v Speaker 1>able to speak eventually as friends. And even then we're

0:17:53.000 --> 0:17:55.360
<v Speaker 1>not like, hey, what are you doing every day? We'll

0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:58.960
<v Speaker 1>just you know, occasionally check in whatever. Like it seems

0:17:59.000 --> 0:18:01.360
<v Speaker 1>like she wants to be in your life completely, which

0:18:01.480 --> 0:18:04.680
<v Speaker 1>is not realistic at all for your healing, not even

0:18:04.760 --> 0:18:06.840
<v Speaker 1>about her at all. You do what you need to

0:18:06.840 --> 0:18:12.840
<v Speaker 1>do to heal, that's it. Mm hmm Yeah, well, Luke, Yeah,

0:18:12.840 --> 0:18:15.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean I couldn't agree more. I mean, like I

0:18:15.040 --> 0:18:17.199
<v Speaker 1>said earlier, I just I think a good question that

0:18:17.200 --> 0:18:19.800
<v Speaker 1>Olivia posed is do you think you need this person

0:18:19.880 --> 0:18:22.880
<v Speaker 1>in your life? And uh so, best of luck. That's

0:18:22.880 --> 0:18:24.879
<v Speaker 1>not easy, especially if you date someone and have to

0:18:24.880 --> 0:18:28.280
<v Speaker 1>cut them off. But man, I've been in relationships where

0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:32.080
<v Speaker 1>it's just like that constant where it's over, but it's

0:18:32.080 --> 0:18:33.879
<v Speaker 1>not over, and you guys are still talking, and then

0:18:33.920 --> 0:18:35.760
<v Speaker 1>you'll meet up and then you'll hook up and it's

0:18:35.800 --> 0:18:38.080
<v Speaker 1>like awkward, and then it like continues and it just

0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:42.720
<v Speaker 1>makes a breakup far worse and longer, exactly, and it's

0:18:42.760 --> 0:18:45.080
<v Speaker 1>just worse for both of you. So unfortunately, as sad

0:18:45.119 --> 0:18:48.640
<v Speaker 1>as it is, I think it's quite unhealthy for her

0:18:48.640 --> 0:18:50.560
<v Speaker 1>to keep checking up on you, especially she's the one

0:18:50.600 --> 0:18:52.040
<v Speaker 1>who broke up with you. It sounds like she wants

0:18:52.040 --> 0:18:54.840
<v Speaker 1>her cake, and uh she wants to eat it too.

0:18:54.880 --> 0:18:56.879
<v Speaker 1>How does that saying go? She wants her cake and

0:18:56.920 --> 0:18:59.640
<v Speaker 1>eat it too. She wants to have her cake and

0:18:59.680 --> 0:19:02.680
<v Speaker 1>eat it too. Thank you very much, so, Luke, That's

0:19:02.680 --> 0:19:04.919
<v Speaker 1>what I think. But best of luck, buddy. Thank you

0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:06.640
<v Speaker 1>so much for calling the podcast. I hope that helped.

0:19:06.640 --> 0:19:09.200
<v Speaker 1>I really do. Yeah, I know it definitely does. Thank

0:19:09.200 --> 0:19:11.520
<v Speaker 1>you guys. Thanks all right, Well that's gonna do it

0:19:11.560 --> 0:19:13.840
<v Speaker 1>for this week's episode of the caller edition of Help

0:19:13.880 --> 0:19:16.200
<v Speaker 1>by Suck At Dating. Olivia, You've been a pleasure. Thank

0:19:16.240 --> 0:19:19.240
<v Speaker 1>you so much for joining us. Of course, happy and

0:19:20.119 --> 0:19:22.400
<v Speaker 1>everybody listening. Make sure you guys tune in. Next week.

0:19:22.560 --> 0:19:25.719
<v Speaker 1>Dean and myself will be back here for another episode

0:19:25.760 --> 0:19:27.680
<v Speaker 1>of help by Suck a Dating, and hopefully we'll all

0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:30.199
<v Speaker 1>just suck a little less. Follow Help by Suck At

0:19:30.280 --> 0:19:33.000
<v Speaker 1>Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to

0:19:33.080 --> 0:19:33.520
<v Speaker 1>podcast