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Speaker 1: All from and hello.

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Speaker 2: Hello, Hey, what's up man?

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Speaker 1: Hey? What's up? Man? Hell's your day? Man?

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Speaker 2: My day has been fine, I would say, okay, how

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Speaker 2: about yours? What you been up to?

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Speaker 1: It's been alrighty man. I just gotta work. But it's

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Speaker 1: fucking hot as ship. It's like ninety five right now

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Speaker 1: over here in California.

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Speaker 2: It's pretty hot as ships is. What's up? Man? Would

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Speaker 2: you want to talk about today?

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Speaker 1: Oh? Fuck? All right? I wanted to talk about how

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Speaker 1: like my family has just been like the grainy lately,

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Speaker 1: like they don't see me as as as their son anymore,

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Speaker 1: so like they just see me as a I was

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Speaker 1: just disappointment. Mm hmmm. Uh. I grew up as a Mexican.

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Speaker 1: My mom is very religious, she's a Mexican, and lately

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Speaker 1: she's just been been looking at looking at me with disgust,

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Speaker 1: with disappointment, with with with like she didn't see me

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Speaker 1: as her son anymore. And it hurts. It makes me

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Speaker 1: like at night, makes me cry and makes me it

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Speaker 1: makes me like, it makes me heart ache. It seems

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Speaker 1: like like she doesn't want me to like be referr

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Speaker 1: anymore like living for mmm and I'm twenty. I just

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Speaker 1: turned training this year in May, and I've been struggling.

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Speaker 1: I've been struggling with money. I've been struggling with with

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Speaker 1: my girlfriend. She's she's she's helped a lot, but at

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Speaker 1: the same time, she's been kicking me down.

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Speaker 2: Hmm, kicking you Okay, Wait, I have questions about your mom.

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Speaker 2: But what do you mean to your girlfriend's kicking you down?

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Speaker 1: Like sometimes she she sees me as a bum because

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Speaker 1: because I smoke weed, because I have I have my

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Speaker 1: time by myself with my friends, just smoking and drinking,

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Speaker 1: and she thinks that instead of me doing this, I

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Speaker 1: should be I should be going out and you know,

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Speaker 1: doing more, which I agree with, but in the way

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Speaker 1: that she explains it to me, it seems like she

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Speaker 1: she's just like sick and tired of me already.

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Speaker 2: Hmmm, all right, let's start with let's start with your mom,

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Speaker 2: then we'll get into your girlfriend. But so your mom

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Speaker 2: is deeply religious and she's been ragging on you. Why

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Speaker 2: is it? What? What does she ragging on you?

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Speaker 3: For?

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Speaker 1: Lately? It's been about work and that I don't do

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Speaker 1: anything around the house. I'm not helping her. That that

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Speaker 1: she sees that I'm not doing much effort into into

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Speaker 1: going forward into my life even though she's she sees

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Speaker 1: it from like a closed door. You feel me, tell

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Speaker 1: me more, like I feel like I'm working double shift.

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Speaker 1: I'm working overnights just to just to like give her rent,

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Speaker 1: just to make her satisfied with me, to make her

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Speaker 1: show like, hey, yeah, no worries.

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Speaker 2: Okay, wait, so you're okay, we'll talk all right, we'll

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Speaker 2: talk about like the relationship ship in a sec. But logistically,

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Speaker 2: you're paying your mom rent? Yeah, brow, how much do

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Speaker 2: you pay your mom in the rent?

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Speaker 1: I pay five hundred each month?

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Speaker 2: You pay my.

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Speaker 1: Five hundred with like with the INNA bill and and

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Speaker 1: my phone bill.

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Speaker 2: Can I ask you a question? Well, kind ask the question?

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Speaker 2: What if you're paying rent, why do you still live

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Speaker 2: with your mom? Like, why would you why would you

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Speaker 2: rather live with your mom than like live in an

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Speaker 2: apartment with like three or four other dudes.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, I don't have that many friends. I don't. I don't.

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Speaker 1: This this job I just started working at, it's it's

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Speaker 1: been hard for me to like even talk with my

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Speaker 1: peers and my it's the people I'm working with. The

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Speaker 1: only friend I have is my my friend from childhood.

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Speaker 1: But right now he's doing his own thing, and you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't even want to like bother him with like

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Speaker 1: with my uh troubles.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. But there's the other like, what what what part

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Speaker 2: of California do you live in?

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Speaker 1: I live in like the the I e. Like near

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Speaker 1: Los Angeles?

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Speaker 2: Oh you live near Los Angeles?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like not right away from Los Angeles.

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Speaker 2: Will say, okay, well like Anaheim type of area.

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Speaker 1: We'll say, you know, San bornandin know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, sure, I've heard of it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I live around there.

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Speaker 2: Okay, dude. The first thing I'm gonna say is, like,

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Speaker 2: if you're living I would get it if you were

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Speaker 2: like living with with your folks to save money. But

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Speaker 2: if you're still paying your mom rent and like your

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Speaker 2: relationship with her is making you uh pissed off, then

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Speaker 2: like and you're like just not around anyone like you.

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Speaker 2: I think I think you should try to find a

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Speaker 2: different situation where you can probably you can probably find

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Speaker 2: a situation somewhere in San Bernardino where you're still paying

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Speaker 2: like a relatively similar amount, maybe a couple hundred dollars higher,

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Speaker 2: but still like something relatively that amount, where like you're

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Speaker 2: with like other dudes your age, you know, and they

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Speaker 2: don't have to even be dudes, you know, like just

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Speaker 2: you know, like there's Facebook groups you can go on

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Speaker 2: and like meet people, like there's ways to to do

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Speaker 2: it so that you have like some form of autonomy.

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Speaker 2: I spent. I would get it if you were like

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Speaker 2: staying there because you're uh saving money. But if you're

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Speaker 2: paying rent anyway, and your mom is like fucking treating

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Speaker 2: you like ship, I mean, just for your own health, man, Oh,

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Speaker 2: I would. I would go see what else is out there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I haven't been doing that. I haven't been looking

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Speaker 1: at like lady. I've just been here from like from

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Speaker 1: like other people about how how much the paints right

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Speaker 1: and how much they can't even do the job I'm working.

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Speaker 1: I feel like it's not enough for for Let's stay

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Speaker 1: in an apartment or a studio.

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Speaker 2: You feel me, Well, that's definitely not You're not gonna

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Speaker 2: have enough for a studio, but like apartment, But if

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Speaker 2: you're gonna have like an apartment with people, you might

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Speaker 2: if you're gonna like be paying rent on an apartment,

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Speaker 2: you know what, you know what I'm gonna do. Let's know,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna do this I'm actually curious. Right now, let's

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Speaker 2: go onto Craigslist, craig.

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Speaker 1: You're going to go and I.

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Speaker 2: Want to go in. I'm just curious because you might

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Speaker 2: be right.

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Speaker 1: This might be.

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Speaker 2: But let's let's do this right now. Okay, Room for rent,

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Speaker 2: Sam Bernardino, Rooms for rent and sand Bernardino. Let's see here.

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Speaker 2: Roomies dot com was this? Okay, let's see here. Oh

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Speaker 2: look at this?

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Speaker 1: Good question?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, hit me.

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Speaker 1: Where are you right now? Are you still on tour?

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Speaker 2: I'm in New York. Okay, look at this, I mean

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Speaker 2: this furnished room. Wait, are we gonna say no?

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Speaker 1: No? Tell me, tell me, I don't care about anything else.

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Speaker 1: Tell me.

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Speaker 2: Okay, look at this seven hundred and twenty dollars a

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Speaker 2: month furnished private room share, a bathroom, Internet included parking available.

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Speaker 1: Uh.

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Speaker 2: The landlady likes to practice her piano in the morning.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, I've never used this. Roomies dot com shit,

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Speaker 2: but like neither.

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Speaker 1: I've never heard about this, but I didn't.

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Speaker 2: I'm that's see. Let's go on craigslist. Craiglist is maybe

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Speaker 2: a little weirder. Let's say, look at this furnished room

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Speaker 2: six hundred dollars a month, San Bernardino, right near college.

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Speaker 2: You live by the you live by that college. That

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Speaker 2: what CSU or value? Yeah, c s USB, Yeah, DoD

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Speaker 2: There's so many rooms that are like seven fifty five

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Speaker 2: fifty same price. Where is this? Let's see? Oh, look,

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Speaker 2: you could rent a Look, you could save one hundred

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Speaker 2: and twenty five dollars a month if you rent a couch. Okay,

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Speaker 2: Manuel looking, Manuel is looking for men to sleep on

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Speaker 2: his sofa for three hundred and seventy five dollars a month.

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Speaker 2: You could do that.

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Speaker 1: Wow, what if you sleep on the couch together?

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Speaker 2: What if you and you and me sleep on the

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Speaker 2: couch together? Yeah with Manuel, I'm gonna politely decline. Wait,

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Speaker 2: living room private Look at this living room private area,

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Speaker 2: six hundred dollars for like, for like a few one

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Speaker 2: hundred dollars extra, you could totally move out of your parents.

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Speaker 2: That's all I'm saying. I'm looking at it right now.

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Speaker 2: I'm on the Craigslist, I'm on zillow. You could probably

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Speaker 2: find some not Let's look at the let's look at

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Speaker 2: the Facebook group. Let's see what's going. Let me see

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Speaker 2: if I can find a chill looking person on the

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Speaker 2: Facebook group because you definitely don't want to be hanging

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Speaker 2: out with any like insane people.

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Speaker 1: No, no, what do we got especially in Semonade? Do

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Speaker 1: you know? You never know? I don't know if you

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Speaker 1: heard about Semonay doo?

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Speaker 2: No, what's up with what's the deal with San Bernardino?

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Speaker 1: D This ship is fucking ghetto, bro, This ship has marked.

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Speaker 2: Over here, hello, looking for a room? And also like

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Speaker 2: probably so many of these people. Yeah, like I'm looking

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Speaker 2: at the Facebook group right now, and so many people

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Speaker 2: are like, I don't use drugs or alcohol, Like I

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Speaker 2: think a lot of people are like get burnt on,

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Speaker 2: like folks who are moving in without paying rent and

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Speaker 2: just like using drugs and shit. But dude, I bet

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Speaker 2: for again. I'm just saying. I'm just saying I've done

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Speaker 2: a quick little Google search, and I'm seeing that it

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Speaker 2: is possible for you to move out for only a

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Speaker 2: couple hundred bucks more than than what you're paying. So

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Speaker 2: so there's that logistically, I really think you should do that. Okay,

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Speaker 2: we've covered that. Anyway, let's talk about the other things.

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Speaker 2: Let's talk more about your mom, because like, let's talk

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Speaker 2: more about your mom, because your mom's still your mom,

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Speaker 2: even if you move out. Your mom is your mom?

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Speaker 2: Why does she not see you as a song? What's

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Speaker 2: that deal? What's that deal? What's going on there?

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Speaker 1: Lately? She just thinks that like Nie smoking and just

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Speaker 1: sticking with this ups job. If she seems like I'm

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Speaker 1: not like, uh, going forward with my life, she thinks

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Speaker 1: that I have to like step out of my comfort

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Speaker 1: zone and you know, pursue more.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well let's talk about that. Forget about your mom

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Speaker 2: and for a second, forget about your girlfriend. We'll get

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Speaker 2: to your girlfriend. But how do you feel about your life?

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Speaker 2: Do you want more out of your existence right now?

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Speaker 1: Like I'm satisfied where I'm at to be honest, Like

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Speaker 1: I don't need anything more or anything less. But for her,

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Speaker 1: she thinks that I just need to keep going Okay,

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Speaker 1: But for me personally, in my heart, in my mind,

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Speaker 1: I'm pretty I'm pretty happy where I'm at.

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Speaker 2: Okay, if that's how you really believe, If that's how

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Speaker 2: you really feel, I'm telling you, Like, if that's how

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Speaker 2: you really feel, then I would leave your mom's house.

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Speaker 2: Your mom is probably also just like pissed off because

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Speaker 2: like you're you're in Like does she do anything to

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Speaker 2: take care of you, Like I know you pay rent, right,

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Speaker 2: but like does she do shit around the house? Like

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Speaker 2: is does she do your laundry? Like is any of

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Speaker 2: that shit going on?

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Speaker 1: Well? After like me turning eighteen, she just stopped doing

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Speaker 1: all of that. She said, like, you're grown, you take

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Speaker 1: care of yourself. So like after eighteen, I've been cooking

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Speaker 1: for myself. I've been been making food for my I've

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Speaker 1: been making my own clothes. I've been fooding my clothes.

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Speaker 1: I've been buying my own clothes. So like it's not

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Speaker 1: really that like she doesn't like care for me, Like

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Speaker 1: she just wants me to like be on my own lane.

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Speaker 1: Now she doesn't even want to like be with me anymore.

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Speaker 2: You know, it sounds like it sounds like she wants Okay,

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Speaker 2: this is just the vibe I'm getting right. I mean,

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Speaker 2: it sounds like she wants you to like go live

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Speaker 2: your own life, not necessarily. I'm not hearing that she

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Speaker 2: doesn't love you. I'm not hearing that she thinks you're

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Speaker 2: a piece of shit. I'm not hearing that she wishes

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Speaker 2: you were never born. I'm just hearing that like she's like, hey, bro,

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Speaker 2: like you're my son, and that's great, but you gotta

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Speaker 2: get the fuck out of here and like live your life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it just sucks, you know, like coming out here

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Speaker 1: was like almost nothing in like like right away, having

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Speaker 1: to like be on your own. What do you mean?

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Speaker 2: What do you wait? What do you what do you mean?

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Speaker 1: Coming out here like like like like life, you know,

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Speaker 1: like the adult life will say, like having no one

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Speaker 1: around you, you having to focus on your your bills,

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Speaker 1: your rat your your necessities, your your your job. It's

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Speaker 1: like she when when I was growing up, I feel

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Speaker 1: like she didn't really like show me how to how

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Speaker 1: to be on my own. She never she was never

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Speaker 1: really there for me. She she she would just say,

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Speaker 1: whatever you need, I'm here, and that's it. She will

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Speaker 1: never say she will never go out on her own

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Speaker 1: way and help me.

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Speaker 2: Wait, she's so growing up. She said, whenever you need me,

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Speaker 2: I'm here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Okay, all right, So it sounds like she gave you

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Speaker 2: Is it sounds like she gave you pretty good unconditional

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Speaker 2: love as a child.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, No, of course, Okay, she was a loving mother.

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Speaker 1: But now it's just like it's different. I mean now

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Speaker 1: like I really do want to move out and like explore.

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Speaker 1: It's like something in my heart that I really want

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Speaker 1: to do. I just want to just look at this

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Speaker 1: world and see how beautiful it is. I don't want

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Speaker 1: to be stuck here forever. For example, my brother U,

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Speaker 1: he used to live with us so like until he

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Speaker 1: was twenty five, and and he got addicted to cocaine.

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Speaker 1: He's addicted to to to other drugs and and the

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Speaker 1: reason is from from our parents. I won't go into

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Speaker 1: detail of my brother's trauma, but it's something that I

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Speaker 1: don't even see him anymore because he doesn't even want

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Speaker 1: to be near us. That like, our parents drained him

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Speaker 1: so much that he doesn't want to live with us anymore.

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Speaker 1: He was he's on I rarely see him, like every

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Speaker 1: every couple of months, m hm, And like, I want

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Speaker 1: to get out of this house before I'm drained just

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Speaker 1: like him. I don't want to be hooked up and

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Speaker 1: and like sucked in the head, dude, go herring.

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Speaker 2: Dude, go, you should you should move out. You should

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Speaker 2: go on craigslist and find some like, you know, find

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Speaker 2: a fucking house with like five roommates and like get

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Speaker 2: on that shipka suck man, your mom just wants your

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Speaker 2: mom just wants you to like live your own life.

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Speaker 2: Let's talk about your girlfriend. So your girlfriend, your girlfriend

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Speaker 2: is also kind of like it's your girlfriend is also

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Speaker 2: on your ass.

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Speaker 1: She she's not on my ass as much as my mom,

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Speaker 1: but she she does like when I'm when I'm out

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Speaker 1: with my friends or like some some petty shit she does.

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Speaker 1: Who she just she just wants to like be done

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Speaker 1: with me and like, nah be with me anymore.

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Speaker 2: Brother, let me ask you a question.

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Speaker 1: Asking anything low I'm open ears my.

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Speaker 2: Boy, do you do you love this girl?

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Speaker 1: I fucking love her? Bro?

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Speaker 2: Do you actually really, dude?

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Speaker 1: I fucking love her, dude, Like even though like she

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Speaker 1: does like like she like she does these things, like

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Speaker 1: I look up to her. Bro. She she's like she

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Speaker 1: makes me serious. Yeah, bro, like she she's my my

291
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Speaker 1: past sext. She she literally fucked me over. She fucked

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Speaker 1: my head, she fucked with my heart.

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Speaker 2: Okay, forget about forget about YOURX man, forget about your ax.

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Speaker 2: This lady, this woman who is like telling you that

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Speaker 2: she's gonna be done with you because of like drinking

296
00:17:56,440 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 2: and smoking all these things. If you really love this

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Speaker 2: lady and you really want to be with this lady,

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Speaker 2: you try everything in your power to be the kind

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Speaker 2: of guy that she wants to be with and and

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Speaker 2: the whole. One of the great things but being in

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Speaker 2: a relationship is that it forces you to become better.

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00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:22,560
Speaker 2: So like, let this girl force you to become better.

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Speaker 2: You don't want to You don't want another person to

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00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:27,600
Speaker 2: force you to be something you're not, you know what

305
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:32,760
Speaker 2: I mean. But you do want your partner to force

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00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:39,239
Speaker 2: you honestly indirectly through like a spot, through looking up

307
00:18:39,240 --> 00:18:42,560
Speaker 2: to them, or through just like this inherent desire to

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00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:46,000
Speaker 2: want to be better for them. Like let that be

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00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:50,919
Speaker 2: your thing. Like if if you know, like your girlfriend

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Speaker 2: wants you to start. It's not like you're telling me

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Speaker 2: like your girlfriend wants you to stop playing guitar because

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00:18:56,160 --> 00:19:00,320
Speaker 2: she thinks it's stupid or whatever. Like like your girl

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00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:04,680
Speaker 2: wants you to be a better person. Yeah, Like let

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00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:08,119
Speaker 2: her do that, and like use that as motivation to

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Speaker 2: like do this ship that's gonna make your life better.

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Speaker 1: I have a quick question for you, love what's up?

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Speaker 1: How much do you love pizza?

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Speaker 2: How much do I love pizza?

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00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:32,440
Speaker 1: Yeah?

320
00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:34,200
Speaker 2: I like pizza a lot. Why do you ask.

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00:19:37,119 --> 00:19:39,920
Speaker 1: If we're stuck on an only for a hundred years

322
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:42,120
Speaker 1: would you prefer burgers or pizza?

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Speaker 2: Did you listen to anything I just said? I just

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00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:45,680
Speaker 2: went on a whole impassion to rant.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, dude, I I I'm so sorry. No,

326
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,040
Speaker 1: I did listen to everything you said.

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Speaker 2: Listen, by the way, can I can?

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Speaker 1: I can? I?

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Speaker 2: Actually, by the way, listen, here's another thing. I I

330
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,240
Speaker 2: don't think you should do this. I think this will

331
00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:04,480
Speaker 2: make you depressed. I really do. I really think this

332
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:07,359
Speaker 2: will make you depressed. Or maybe it won't. I don't know.

333
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,359
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know. Everyone's wired differently. People

334
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:15,959
Speaker 2: live lives that I seem depressing, but they're happy with them.

335
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:18,680
Speaker 2: If you really do just want to like not have

336
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:23,480
Speaker 2: a girlfriend and just like pay your mom five hundred

337
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:25,640
Speaker 2: dollars in rent and work your job, and you really

338
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:27,280
Speaker 2: are like like because you were telling me that you

339
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:30,439
Speaker 2: were happy, Like you don't have to do any of

340
00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:33,639
Speaker 2: this shit if you really don't want to, but like

341
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,800
Speaker 2: at bare minimum, like your mom wants you to leave

342
00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:42,919
Speaker 2: the house, like you should leave, and your girlfriend wants

343
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:46,320
Speaker 2: to be with someone who like wants step up for her,

344
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:50,640
Speaker 2: and so like at least like if if you don't

345
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:55,000
Speaker 2: want to do any of this shit. You don't have to.

346
00:20:55,080 --> 00:21:01,439
Speaker 2: You're obligated to nothing in this fucking planet. But you know,

347
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,720
Speaker 2: do you know what I mean? Like make the choice.

348
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:11,919
Speaker 1: I understand and like like hearing it, like it sucks

349
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:13,320
Speaker 1: to hear it because.

350
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:16,480
Speaker 2: Why why does it suck? Why does it suck? None

351
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:18,600
Speaker 2: of none of this, none of this should suck.

352
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:22,080
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, no, let me explain, motherfucker all right?

353
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:32,920
Speaker 1: For me, I always see myself to like, but I'm

354
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:37,639
Speaker 1: i'm aa just to do the minimum, and like it

355
00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:45,080
Speaker 1: sucks that that I'm gonna have to to be completely

356
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:53,679
Speaker 1: satisfied with myself. I have to move on and I

357
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:56,440
Speaker 1: have to keep going, and I have to look up

358
00:21:56,880 --> 00:22:00,520
Speaker 1: and do my ship and do and and now exactly

359
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:05,000
Speaker 1: how you said, I'm obligated to do what uh you

360
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:10,359
Speaker 1: recommending me? But like it's the truth. My mom only

361
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:14,280
Speaker 1: wants better for me and and just the way she

362
00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:16,920
Speaker 1: does it, it just sucks.

363
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:21,679
Speaker 2: But everything you just said doesn't suck. Everything you just

364
00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 2: said is good. Like you're being dude, you're twenty, you're twenty, man, Yeah,

365
00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:32,760
Speaker 2: like you like you go be a go be a

366
00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:35,800
Speaker 2: better version of yourself that you'll like you'll learn that

367
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:46,560
Speaker 2: you can do it.

368
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:48,639
Speaker 1: Fuck a lot. How did you get some knowledgeable bro?

369
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 2: I don't I'm I'm I'm I'm a piece of shit.

370
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,680
Speaker 1: But no, you're not. I don't ever say that. Bro.

371
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Speaker 2: Whatever, whatever, No, you're I'm gonna stop. You're right, you're right.

372
00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:04,159
Speaker 2: Uh No, you learn that you can do it. I

373
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:05,920
Speaker 2: mean it's scary, dude, by the way, it is scary.

374
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:09,080
Speaker 2: It's scary to like try to be better. It's hard, man.

375
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Speaker 2: I mean, I I have so many habits that I'm like.

376
00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:12,800
Speaker 3: That.

377
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:15,720
Speaker 2: I don't like that. I'm like stuck in and it's hard.

378
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:19,680
Speaker 2: But like you're i'd just too young to like throw

379
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,200
Speaker 2: in the towel against yourself.

380
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:25,720
Speaker 1: That's what I'm doing. I'm just giving up early.

381
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:30,880
Speaker 2: But yeah, dude, don't give up early. Go on Craigslist,

382
00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:36,399
Speaker 2: move out of there. Consider, consider submitting to your girlfriends,

383
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:41,359
Speaker 2: please that you like get your shit together, and uh

384
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:44,320
Speaker 2: you'll be You'll be happier, You'll realize, you'll realize you

385
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 2: can do it. Like you just don't know because you

386
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:50,960
Speaker 2: haven't tried, but like you can, you can do it.

387
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:54,879
Speaker 2: You just got to give yourself permission to like try

388
00:23:55,119 --> 00:24:01,320
Speaker 2: and not just do the bare minimum, or if you really,

389
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:04,080
Speaker 2: honest to God, think you would be happy doing the

390
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,720
Speaker 2: bare minimum, then do it. But I think if you

391
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:08,879
Speaker 2: were that happy doing the bare minimum, you wouldn't be

392
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:14,320
Speaker 2: calling me right now to talk about it or right Yeah,

393
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:15,280
Speaker 2: what's your name again?

394
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 1: My name is Maxwell, Dan.

395
00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:25,919
Speaker 2: Maxwell Maxwell, Maxwell Maxwell. Thanks for talking to me, Man.

396
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 2: I appreciate you. Is there anything else you want to

397
00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:30,239
Speaker 2: say to the people? Is there anything else to say

398
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:31,640
Speaker 2: the people of the computer before we go?

399
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:37,439
Speaker 1: Well, hopefully this goes on the podcast. It's not fuck it.

400
00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,679
Speaker 1: As long as I talked to my man, law I

401
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:43,200
Speaker 1: love you, Man, I love it everybody. I love everybody

402
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:46,639
Speaker 1: that that talks to you. It opens my ears. It

403
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:50,800
Speaker 1: opens my mind of how how different everybody can be

404
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:53,960
Speaker 1: and what everyone goes through. And I think you, Bro,

405
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:58,240
Speaker 1: I've been listening to you forever. It's it's crazy that

406
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:01,119
Speaker 1: the things you do to people they do for people,

407
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:08,119
Speaker 1: the the trips you go on. I wish you more

408
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:10,440
Speaker 1: and more and more in your lifetime. Bro.

409
00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:14,200
Speaker 2: Thank you Maxwell, you too, Man for everyone you too.

410
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:14,440
Speaker 1: Man.

411
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:18,320
Speaker 2: I appreciate you very much. I'm rooting for you. Maxwell.

412
00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:20,520
Speaker 2: Give us an update. I want to Maxwell, give me

413
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:21,920
Speaker 2: an call.

414
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 1: Me.

415
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 2: Call me a year for man, you know what, call me.

416
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:26,959
Speaker 2: I don't even wait a year. Call me when you

417
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,000
Speaker 2: have an update. When you have an update, if you're

418
00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:33,720
Speaker 2: like things are going well, I moved out of my parents' house.

419
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,080
Speaker 2: My you know, give me an update when when you

420
00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:37,199
Speaker 2: have one. I want to hear it.

421
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:41,200
Speaker 1: I got you, man, all right, man, just keep getting it,

422
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:45,359
Speaker 1: keep living in your last man, and thank you everyone,

423
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,600
Speaker 1: Thank you, Lulo, thank you. Loo have going on all right?

424
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:50,040
Speaker 2: YouTube? Maxwell? Take care?

425
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 3: Man, all right?

426
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 1: YouTube Man peace.

427
00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:57,800
Speaker 2: So then, Jude, maybe I'll move to San Bernardino. Eight hundred.

428
00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:00,280
Speaker 2: This is some you can get. You can get some

429
00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 2: pretty nice digs for like eight hundred dollars. That's pretty good.

430
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:15,080
Speaker 2: Furnished room in a nice house. Nine hundred dollars. Oh,

431
00:26:15,119 --> 00:26:25,480
Speaker 2: this one's cannabis friendly, LGBTQ friendly, dog friendly. Nice. Hello,

432
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:26,080
Speaker 2: all right?

433
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:27,040
Speaker 1: Is this smile?

434
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 2: This is what's going on with you?

435
00:26:30,480 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 3: Holy crap, it's got much. I was just in the

436
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 3: lab right now, Holy crap. Oh you're recording right now.

437
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:43,000
Speaker 2: Yes, we are recording. It's now a good time to talk.

438
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:47,240
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, I I'm not too busy right now, so

439
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:50,720
Speaker 3: I've I have some time. Yeah, Holy crap.

440
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:53,760
Speaker 1: This is exciting.

441
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:57,880
Speaker 2: How's it going, Gek, how's it going with me? It's

442
00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:00,480
Speaker 2: going all right. It's a bit of a cloudy day

443
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 2: here in America. I don't know where you are. You

444
00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 2: sound American, and I assume you're in America. Indeed, Yeah,

445
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:11,160
Speaker 2: what's going on with you? Vince? How's life?

446
00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:13,200
Speaker 1: Life?

447
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:19,800
Speaker 3: Things are going pretty good. It's a lot of, how

448
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:24,159
Speaker 3: I say, a lot of optimization. I've had to change

449
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:29,600
Speaker 3: a lot of things in my life, but I've how

450
00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 3: I say it, I think optimization has been the key

451
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,159
Speaker 3: word in my life, and I've had to embrace a

452
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:40,600
Speaker 3: lot of changes in my life thus far, but I

453
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:44,359
Speaker 3: I'm learning to embrace it in a more positive manner.

454
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 2: Now, Okay, what do you mean by optimization? Is the

455
00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,320
Speaker 2: key word in your life? What is? What do you

456
00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 2: mean by that?

457
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 3: So in my case for optimization, I've I think I

458
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:58,800
Speaker 3: always try to look at things as like I have

459
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,560
Speaker 3: to fix this problem, must fix this issue, I must

460
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:05,080
Speaker 3: fix blah blah blah blah blah. And that's always something

461
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 3: that has persisted. So I've always tried to fix or

462
00:28:09,400 --> 00:28:13,320
Speaker 3: quote unquote fix like my mental health problems, my own

463
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 3: issues that occur in my braid. But but you know,

464
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:24,320
Speaker 3: I think I have been learning to try to just

465
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:27,199
Speaker 3: not focus on optimization as much as that's been a

466
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:31,600
Speaker 3: like I would say sixty to seventy percent of my

467
00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:35,760
Speaker 3: life has been that term. And then now in the

468
00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:39,600
Speaker 3: past few years, I've been trying to see life as, oh,

469
00:28:39,680 --> 00:28:42,440
Speaker 3: I just kind of live in it and I can

470
00:28:42,520 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 3: just look, I can that's okay.

471
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,520
Speaker 2: Right, I get what you mean. You've been trying to, uh,

472
00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:51,800
Speaker 2: you know, make more money, make your penis bigger, live,

473
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,800
Speaker 2: live life better, do all yourself optimizing. But now you're like,

474
00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:57,400
Speaker 2: you know what, I'm just gonna live.

475
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:02,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I like to just kind of live and at

476
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:07,480
Speaker 3: the same time because I really enjoy science, so I

477
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:10,840
Speaker 3: try to just there's a lot of people in science

478
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:14,160
Speaker 3: they like look at it as if, oh, we must

479
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:18,680
Speaker 3: try to like optimize or like do things just so.

480
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:22,480
Speaker 3: Then there's a lot there's a section of people they

481
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:25,120
Speaker 3: look at it as solely just for the benefit of

482
00:29:26,160 --> 00:29:28,320
Speaker 3: like humanity, And there's nothing wrong with that.

483
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 1: For sure.

484
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:34,320
Speaker 3: I've always liked learning about in researching science just for

485
00:29:34,360 --> 00:29:37,080
Speaker 3: the sake of it. That's that's, you know, just in

486
00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:39,440
Speaker 3: its purest form.

487
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:40,520
Speaker 1: Because I like.

488
00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 3: Looking at how things work, how you know cells behave,

489
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:47,560
Speaker 3: and how they operate in our bodies.

490
00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:51,120
Speaker 2: You know you mentioned earlier that you were calling from

491
00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,360
Speaker 2: a lab. What lab are you at?

492
00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:58,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I won't disclose institution, but I am at a

493
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:04,320
Speaker 3: university currently. I am a graduate student. So the kind

494
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:09,520
Speaker 3: of research we do, without bogging down with jargon, is

495
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 3: we try to look at like the kind of the

496
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 3: shadow molecules that exist in the cells of the heart.

497
00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:23,120
Speaker 3: So these kind of mysterious molecules that kind of guide

498
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,760
Speaker 3: disease progression. So when someone has like a heart attack,

499
00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 3: how do those proteins behave such that, you know, cardiac

500
00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 3: disease progresses. And I look at one of these weird

501
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 3: proteins that like no one really knows what it does,

502
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:44,720
Speaker 3: Like it's it's even by like biology standards. It's weird.

503
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,760
Speaker 3: It's a weird protein, so at least I think it is.

504
00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:50,280
Speaker 3: But that's what makes it interesting to me.

505
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 2: But yeah, that's cool. I like protein. I had what

506
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 2: I had a I had a muscle milk today. Protein

507
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 2: in that mm hmm.

508
00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

509
00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:07,160
Speaker 3: I think a lot of people do. A lot of

510
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:11,920
Speaker 3: people appretiate protein. I try to recognize when I need protein,

511
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:16,600
Speaker 3: But yeah, I probably should come.

512
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 2: So, Vince, so events, let me ask you this. Let

513
00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:23,040
Speaker 2: me ask you this. You you reached out to my show. Uh,

514
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 2: what is it you wanted to talk about recently?

515
00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 3: I sent, Uh, there's four separate things, but really they're

516
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:33,760
Speaker 3: just like two major things, the one of which we

517
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:36,520
Speaker 3: could talk about are boats depending on the time that

518
00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 3: you have. But I think so one is far more like, oh,

519
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:46,920
Speaker 3: philosophical week, and the other one is more like real

520
00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:49,520
Speaker 3: life kind of you know what, day to day stuff,

521
00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 3: which I feel just.

522
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,760
Speaker 2: Hit me with, Evince, tell me the things.

523
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 3: All right, I'll start with I'll start with like the

524
00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 3: relatability aspect, So okay, something that I have faced in

525
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:06,120
Speaker 3: my life. And like, I've listened to the podcast for

526
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:10,200
Speaker 3: quite a bit, and I know that you have provided

527
00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 3: quite a bit of a vice on community building and

528
00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:17,719
Speaker 3: finding friends through your hobbies and whatnot, which indeed I

529
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 3: have attempted to do for a while. So you know,

530
00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:26,440
Speaker 3: I've gone to different events and whatnot. But my problem is,

531
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:30,520
Speaker 3: even when I go to these events, and even when

532
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 3: I do socialize and I do like make some friends,

533
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:38,959
Speaker 3: sometimes I still find that there's some kind of block.

534
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:43,360
Speaker 3: There is still some kind of inhibition, and it could

535
00:32:43,360 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 3: be any number of things. And like, just as a forewarned,

536
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,960
Speaker 3: like I am seeing a therapist and I've like been

537
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:53,840
Speaker 3: seeing one for a while, so but I still find

538
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:55,360
Speaker 3: that I have a block.

539
00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:58,080
Speaker 2: So what is this block that you have?

540
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:02,160
Speaker 3: I think the block is so sometimes there's a lot

541
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 3: of different things that like I would like to talk

542
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:09,880
Speaker 3: about that. And sometimes I think people when they get

543
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 3: to know me, at least on the surface, they're like, oh,

544
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 3: this guy is just only science. This is this is

545
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:19,400
Speaker 3: all he does and that's it. And I'm like, no,

546
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 3: there's a lot of other like nerdy hobbies and other

547
00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:29,920
Speaker 3: interests that I have in my life that you know,

548
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,360
Speaker 3: when I try to like join these different hobbies, you know,

549
00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 3: I try to embrace it with people. But even when

550
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 3: I go to so for example, like I've i know,

551
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:42,280
Speaker 3: I've been to like a game store nearby in my town,

552
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 3: and the people that I played D and D with,

553
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:50,320
Speaker 3: even when I played that game with them, and even

554
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:53,960
Speaker 3: after like four or five months, I was still pretty quiet,

555
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:56,440
Speaker 3: and I was like, what this fuck is going on?

556
00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:58,760
Speaker 3: Because I'm like, I feel like I should be.

557
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 2: More all right, So what I'm what I'm what I'm here.

558
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:04,560
Speaker 2: What I'm what I'm what I'm hearing. What I'm hearing

559
00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:08,640
Speaker 2: is that you're going out to these events, You're spending

560
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:11,920
Speaker 2: time with people, You're giving it a good shot, You're

561
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:13,400
Speaker 2: hanging out in there for a little while, but you

562
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:17,600
Speaker 2: still don't feel as comfortable as you want to feel.

563
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:19,439
Speaker 2: That's that's what you're trying to say, That's what I'm hearing.

564
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:23,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I still, for some reason, I still don't resonate

565
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 3: with people. And I don't know where that block is

566
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 3: coming from.

567
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 2: Hmmm, uh, when was the last time you felt like

568
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:31,960
Speaker 2: you resonated with anyone?

569
00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:35,640
Speaker 3: I think the moments where I did resonate with with

570
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:40,719
Speaker 3: people is when I'm able to be far more vulnerable

571
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 3: with people, which, you know, I think people try to

572
00:34:44,560 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 3: find those entry points, and I'm sure there are people

573
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:51,480
Speaker 3: that they have a greater propensity to find that way

574
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:54,799
Speaker 3: more than others. But there are times where I wish

575
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:58,959
Speaker 3: I could find it easier, you know, And maybe that's

576
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:01,520
Speaker 3: just due to me being like I'm worried about telling

577
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:05,960
Speaker 3: people that, like I've been playing Slay the Fire too

578
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:10,120
Speaker 3: for like fifty hours, like don't you know, And then

579
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:12,880
Speaker 3: like I'm talking to someone who maybe just I don't know,

580
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:15,680
Speaker 3: like they watch not that I watch Love Island, but

581
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 3: maybe they they're into like other things in pop culture,

582
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:22,719
Speaker 3: and I'm like, I don't know those things, so I

583
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:23,719
Speaker 3: worry about that.

584
00:35:23,719 --> 00:35:28,839
Speaker 2: But but okay, but but Vince, you say your name

585
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:35,080
Speaker 2: was Yeah, but Vince, like your bids for connection don't

586
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:38,480
Speaker 2: have to be based off of liking the same stuff.

587
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 2: And also, like, listen, you know what, so what if

588
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:43,160
Speaker 2: someone likes Love Island, ask them about Love Island. You're

589
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:46,200
Speaker 2: just because you don't know what. Just because a person

590
00:35:46,280 --> 00:35:49,320
Speaker 2: is different from you, it doesn't mean you can't connect

591
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 2: with them. It means you have to let go of

592
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:54,360
Speaker 2: yourself a little bit, like like, you know, it's okay

593
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 2: that you spent like, you know, the fact that you

594
00:35:56,520 --> 00:36:00,680
Speaker 2: spend fifty hours playing Slay the Spire doesn't mean that

595
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:03,759
Speaker 2: you can't connect with this person. All you have to

596
00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:07,960
Speaker 2: do is leave yourself for a second, you know, leave

597
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:12,000
Speaker 2: yourself for a second and try to connect with this

598
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:16,279
Speaker 2: person and see what happened. Like, uh, okay, maybe they

599
00:36:16,280 --> 00:36:18,120
Speaker 2: want to talk about leve Island. Maybe they're the kind

600
00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:21,040
Speaker 2: of person where you're like, there's no way that I

601
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,520
Speaker 2: would connect with this person. But that the only way

602
00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:26,040
Speaker 2: you feel that way because you're not leaving yourself because

603
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 2: you're like attached to this like ego you have of

604
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:33,640
Speaker 2: like what who you will? Yeah, you're stuck to your

605
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:36,799
Speaker 2: inner beliefs of like who you will and won't connect with.

606
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:38,600
Speaker 2: And I don't mean ego in the sense of like

607
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:40,960
Speaker 2: egotistical feeling like you're better than everyone else. I mean

608
00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:47,160
Speaker 2: your your identity, so like what what you have to do?

609
00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 2: And I struggle with this myself sometimes, but like, dude,

610
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 2: there's a thing you got to do of like joining

611
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:58,840
Speaker 2: the living and respecting that you don't know everything and

612
00:36:58,880 --> 00:37:01,319
Speaker 2: you don't know everyone. And when you want to join

613
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:05,040
Speaker 2: the living, you leave yourself and you go. You know what,

614
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:08,160
Speaker 2: I can connect with anyone. I don't care if they're

615
00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:13,319
Speaker 2: like a frat guy whatever, or if they're you know,

616
00:37:14,320 --> 00:37:20,319
Speaker 2: fucking a Chinese businessman or whatever. Like that's I can

617
00:37:20,360 --> 00:37:23,000
Speaker 2: connect be Like I can connect with anyone. All I

618
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:27,799
Speaker 2: have to do is leave myself for a second. You know,

619
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:30,279
Speaker 2: I don't have to because also another reason you have

620
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:32,480
Speaker 2: to leave yourself is because another thing that's preventing you

621
00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:35,640
Speaker 2: from connecting with other people is you're like fear of

622
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:38,160
Speaker 2: being judged or your fear that like you just say

623
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 2: you were talking about playing this video game like you

624
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 2: were going to be judged, you know, like you're afraid

625
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,520
Speaker 2: of like you're afraid that your bid for connection is

626
00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:51,160
Speaker 2: going to be judged by nature of who you are,

627
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:55,360
Speaker 2: because you haven't left yourself, because you're still like afraid

628
00:37:55,400 --> 00:38:01,320
Speaker 2: of your own identity being vulnerable out there. And uh,

629
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 2: but that's a but you, But that's it. That's an

630
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:09,080
Speaker 2: attachment that's not necessary. You're valid, like you're valid in

631
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 2: your existence as a human being trying to connect with

632
00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:17,200
Speaker 2: other people like that, like plain and simple. That's that's it.

633
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,120
Speaker 3: So that should at least be the base line.

634
00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:22,520
Speaker 2: That's the baseline that you operate out of one hundred.

635
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:24,440
Speaker 2: It's based only you gotta operate one hundred for you

636
00:38:24,480 --> 00:38:26,919
Speaker 2: have to operate. Like listen, if I if this guy

637
00:38:27,040 --> 00:38:29,160
Speaker 2: finds out that I just played vide Against for fifty

638
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 2: hours and then he's addict to me about it, that's

639
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:37,720
Speaker 2: so his problem, that's so his problem. I am trying

640
00:38:37,760 --> 00:38:41,839
Speaker 2: to connect with another person. I'm valid in doing that.

641
00:38:42,440 --> 00:38:45,279
Speaker 2: And if the other person is gonna reject me, or

642
00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:48,000
Speaker 2: even if they're even if they look at dude. By

643
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:51,719
Speaker 2: the way, even if they look at you and they

644
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 2: don't want to hang out with you for whatever reason.

645
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 4: That's okay, that's okay. That's another thing you have to

646
00:38:57,080 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 4: do that that's not even their problem. They might just no,

647
00:39:00,280 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 4: it's okay if people don't like you. It really, it

648
00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:04,400
Speaker 4: really is. I'm trying to get better at doing that.

649
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:06,880
Speaker 2: I really I've struggled with like, I mean, everyone everyone

650
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:10,719
Speaker 2: wants people to fucking like them, but I've struggle with that.

651
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:13,279
Speaker 2: I've let my ego get in the way of like, oh,

652
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:17,520
Speaker 2: this person should like me. Everyone should like me, you know, uh, platonically, romantically,

653
00:39:17,560 --> 00:39:19,840
Speaker 2: whatever it is like. But that's because that's because I

654
00:39:19,920 --> 00:39:24,799
Speaker 2: was fucking uh for some reason. I just I just

655
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:27,479
Speaker 2: took he's took and every take everything personally, like why

656
00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:32,840
Speaker 2: this is no reason? So like it might not feel

657
00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 2: uh smooth to be comfortable with people, but if you

658
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 2: want to build these bids for connection you have, you

659
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 2: have to be willing to I keep saying it, but

660
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,799
Speaker 2: you have to be willing to like leave yourself. And

661
00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 2: so that's what I would do. Man, I wouldn't like,

662
00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:53,200
Speaker 2: I think you have this. You sound like you're hung

663
00:39:53,280 --> 00:40:00,319
Speaker 2: up on like yourself as like, uh, you know, I

664
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 2: don't know that you sound like you feel like people

665
00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:04,399
Speaker 2: will judge you, and I have that too. I feel

666
00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 2: I have this feeling that like, yeah, you know, I

667
00:40:06,719 --> 00:40:09,640
Speaker 2: think everyone everyone has a little bit of that. Not everyone.

668
00:40:09,719 --> 00:40:12,759
Speaker 2: Some people walk around being like I'm fucking awesome and

669
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 2: cool all the time. I always hear I want dude,

670
00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:20,360
Speaker 2: I try to observe those people, and I like really

671
00:40:20,360 --> 00:40:24,400
Speaker 2: try to because life has so many like inherent awkwardnesses

672
00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:27,400
Speaker 2: that I'm like, I wonder how a really confident, secure

673
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:31,200
Speaker 2: person would uh react in a situation.

674
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:32,440
Speaker 1: Like this situation.

675
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:35,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm fascinating. I'm truly fascinated by it. But they

676
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:37,440
Speaker 2: they're able to They're able to do it. It's like

677
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 2: it's truly like a magic. But anyway, I don't, Yeah,

678
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:51,000
Speaker 2: don't be so attached to like.

679
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:54,480
Speaker 3: To learn to leave myself, Yeah, like leaving letting my

680
00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:59,319
Speaker 3: like letting my essence flow from my body, which like, yeah,

681
00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:02,480
Speaker 3: I don't know. I always like metaphorically, I've always felt

682
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 3: like at an event, I'm kind of like just in

683
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:07,759
Speaker 3: like behind walls. I'm like vigilant of like what am

684
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:09,360
Speaker 3: I gonna do? What am I gonna say, who am

685
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:10,280
Speaker 3: I gonna talk to?

686
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 1: Like?

687
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:14,399
Speaker 3: But I'm like, I mean it just like let those

688
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,759
Speaker 3: walls down and kind of let myself leave a little bit.

689
00:41:17,120 --> 00:41:18,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, let the walls down. That's so, that's the only

690
00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:19,919
Speaker 2: way to get anywhere new.

691
00:41:21,040 --> 00:41:22,840
Speaker 3: How do you how do you try to let yourself

692
00:41:22,920 --> 00:41:24,280
Speaker 3: leave from yourself?

693
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:26,520
Speaker 2: How do I try to let myself leave from myself?

694
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:27,280
Speaker 1: Uh?

695
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:31,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, I while I wear a big fucking gecko costume.

696
00:41:32,560 --> 00:41:35,319
Speaker 1: That's the start I gotta do.

697
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:37,600
Speaker 3: I gotta wear like another I gotta wear like a

698
00:41:38,239 --> 00:41:40,440
Speaker 3: like a praying me into this costume or something.

699
00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 2: How do I how do I let myself? How do

700
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,160
Speaker 2: I let myself leave myself?

701
00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:43,359
Speaker 1: Well?

702
00:41:43,360 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 2: It's hard. It's not always easy. I mean sometimes I like,

703
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:48,959
Speaker 2: uh uh. Sometimes I just feel like a fat piece

704
00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 2: of shit and I'm like, uh in a situation where

705
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:56,799
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, I don't feel like this, this is

706
00:41:56,880 --> 00:42:00,879
Speaker 2: not yeah, I don't like this. And the other times

707
00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:06,200
Speaker 2: I feel like I'm off. But at the end of

708
00:42:06,239 --> 00:42:08,640
Speaker 2: the day, how do how do I leave myself? I

709
00:42:08,680 --> 00:42:14,520
Speaker 2: try to. I don't know. Uh, I just I'm just

710
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:16,880
Speaker 2: like I think I I'm just okay with putting myself

711
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 2: out there. When I need to and I'm okay with

712
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 2: like my flaws and other things, even when they're like painful,

713
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:32,640
Speaker 2: and when they and when I'm like ashamed of them,

714
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:35,160
Speaker 2: I still like at the end of the day, I'm

715
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 2: like okay with it.

716
00:42:36,719 --> 00:42:38,920
Speaker 1: You know, like we have a level of.

717
00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:43,480
Speaker 2: I'm trying, I'm trying. I don't know. Sometimes you know,

718
00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:45,520
Speaker 2: I sometimes you think you got it and then you don't.

719
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:52,680
Speaker 2: But we keep going. Man, what's your name again? Vince? Vince, Yes,

720
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 2: Vince the scientist.

721
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:58,520
Speaker 3: Someday will be hopefully in like the next year or two,

722
00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:02,799
Speaker 3: I will have my doctorate. So you we'll see you

723
00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:03,440
Speaker 3: can make.

724
00:43:03,719 --> 00:43:06,520
Speaker 2: You can make Vince protein bars. Yeah, if you make

725
00:43:06,640 --> 00:43:10,240
Speaker 2: Vince protein enzyme bars, I'll let me know. I'll uh,

726
00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 2: I'll promote them on the on the podcast. You can

727
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:15,560
Speaker 2: have a free advertisement for the Vince protein bars.

728
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,759
Speaker 3: I'll let you know. They'll be like the most like

729
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:25,480
Speaker 3: intuitional bars that will like reduce like your risk for no.

730
00:43:25,480 --> 00:43:27,080
Speaker 2: No, no, no. I want you to. I want you to.

731
00:43:27,160 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 2: I want to. I want you to have it be

732
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:33,160
Speaker 2: something that makes people fatter. Yeah, okay, I want you

733
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:35,160
Speaker 2: to make everyone fatter. I want you to give everyone

734
00:43:35,160 --> 00:43:38,239
Speaker 2: bigger tits. I want you to make everyone fatter, bigger tits. Uh,

735
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 2: you know, I gotta I want to you know, I

736
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,160
Speaker 2: want to live in a world with more fat people.

737
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:47,719
Speaker 2: I think that'd be awesome. Uh, Vince, is there anything

738
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:48,480
Speaker 2: you want to say before.

739
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:54,400
Speaker 3: We got fat? I just want to say to people, like,

740
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:59,800
Speaker 3: keep keep moving forward. Things are things are changing a

741
00:43:59,840 --> 00:44:04,359
Speaker 3: lot in our lives. Then we gotta keep got to

742
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:08,000
Speaker 3: maintain some level of hope. And whether that's in yourself,

743
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:12,520
Speaker 3: whether it's in your community, the people around you. You

744
00:44:12,600 --> 00:44:15,480
Speaker 3: do the best you can, as I am trying to

745
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:17,319
Speaker 3: do the best I can, and Getk is doing the

746
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:19,839
Speaker 3: best he can. I will say, I want to say

747
00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 3: one thing before I go, Gek. I think I went

748
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:26,160
Speaker 3: to I think it was in twenty twenty three. There

749
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:30,600
Speaker 3: you went to There was a Columbus show that you held. Yeah,

750
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:32,880
Speaker 3: I know I went to it briefly. That was that

751
00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:34,440
Speaker 3: was a good time. I'd like to try to go

752
00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:37,480
Speaker 3: to another Ohio show. I think there wasn't a one

753
00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:38,280
Speaker 3: in like Cleveland.

754
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did one in Cleveland a few weeks ago. Yeah,

755
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:43,840
Speaker 2: that Columbus show. That was the one where that was

756
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:48,560
Speaker 2: the show where famously everyone was afraid that a guy

757
00:44:48,560 --> 00:44:50,719
Speaker 2: who came on stage was going to come back in

758
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:52,200
Speaker 2: and kill everyone. Do you remember that?

759
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm trying to remember that. I don't.

760
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:58,680
Speaker 2: There was a guy who came There was a guy

761
00:44:58,719 --> 00:45:01,399
Speaker 2: who came on stage and he was like, I've been

762
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,799
Speaker 2: playing this video game. I forgot what. There's some like

763
00:45:03,880 --> 00:45:07,920
Speaker 2: Soviet themed video game and he's he was like, people

764
00:45:07,920 --> 00:45:10,080
Speaker 2: in this video game are trying to find me and

765
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:10,600
Speaker 2: kill me.

766
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:17,040
Speaker 3: I see, So I think I remember it. Yeah that

767
00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:22,040
Speaker 3: was I was like, oh, oh, I gotta go.

768
00:45:22,760 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, thanks for the show man. I really

769
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:26,120
Speaker 2: appreciate that.

770
00:45:26,880 --> 00:45:29,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it's great. I love listening to the show,

771
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:34,080
Speaker 3: especially while I'm like conducting my research. It balances like

772
00:45:34,160 --> 00:45:36,640
Speaker 3: the logic that I have to put into my studies

773
00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:41,000
Speaker 3: with like humanity. When I listened to like various people

774
00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 3: talk about their lives and I'm like, oh, yeah, I

775
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,799
Speaker 3: relate to that too. I'm a human being like them too.

776
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:47,800
Speaker 1: So sweet.

777
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:48,879
Speaker 3: Thank you for all your work.

778
00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:49,840
Speaker 1: Good stuff.

779
00:45:50,400 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 2: Keep getting on THI man, keep keep doing science.

780
00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:58,120
Speaker 3: I will for as long as I can.

781
00:45:58,960 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 2: I hope you do.

782
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:00,160
Speaker 1: So.

783
00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:01,360
Speaker 3: So yeah, talk to you.

784
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:01,839
Speaker 2: Take care.

785
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:02,680
Speaker 1: Man up.

786
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:09,800
Speaker 2: He hung up. Loves Vince. I always sounds like I

787
00:46:09,880 --> 00:46:12,520
Speaker 2: hung up on him, but he hung up. But that

788
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:14,680
Speaker 2: was Vince. I like Vince. Vince is a scientist. He's

789
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 2: a good science person. Science is important. Science is very,

790
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:25,720
Speaker 2: very important. So I'm happy that Vince's is doing it. Hello, folks,

791
00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:29,560
Speaker 2: how's it going. Welcome to a segment I do on

792
00:46:29,600 --> 00:46:34,399
Speaker 2: this show called gek Mail, where people just like you,

793
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 2: real human people, real human beings send me emails to

794
00:46:42,600 --> 00:46:45,560
Speaker 2: therapy geckomail at gmail dot com, and I read them.

795
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:49,080
Speaker 2: I ponder them. I see if there's anything that we

796
00:46:49,120 --> 00:46:54,120
Speaker 2: can learn about society in the world by reading the

797
00:46:54,160 --> 00:46:57,440
Speaker 2: emails that you people send me. So let's read some

798
00:46:57,480 --> 00:47:02,280
Speaker 2: of these emails. I'm excited about this. This one's from

799
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:04,760
Speaker 2: or No, okay, we'll bleep that out. This is from

800
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:07,000
Speaker 2: This is not from that person. This is from Ryan.

801
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 2: Subject line, I accidentally became a masochist. Hey, Gecko, my

802
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:18,719
Speaker 2: name is Ryan, and I am writing to explain how

803
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:25,000
Speaker 2: over the past week I've started to become a masochist. Now, okay,

804
00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 2: a masochist is one who likes pain inflicted upon themselves.

805
00:47:29,239 --> 00:47:32,520
Speaker 2: Sadist is the one that likes to inflict pain. Okay,

806
00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 2: all right, I get those two confused sometimes. This started

807
00:47:37,560 --> 00:47:40,880
Speaker 2: because I have always been terrified of pain. I've always

808
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:44,240
Speaker 2: been scared of things like needles and going to the dentist.

809
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,480
Speaker 2: But lately I've been wanting to get a lot of

810
00:47:47,520 --> 00:47:51,400
Speaker 2: tattoos and piercings. My job is to walk around a

811
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:54,919
Speaker 2: warehouse all day, so I walk around listening to podcasts.

812
00:47:55,480 --> 00:47:58,600
Speaker 2: I listened to one where someone explained the way that

813
00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:02,239
Speaker 2: the brain process is, and I started looking at it

814
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:07,560
Speaker 2: as just information being sent to my brain rather than

815
00:48:07,640 --> 00:48:12,319
Speaker 2: something scary that I should avoid. That's crazy. Yeah, Once

816
00:48:12,360 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 2: you start to fucking dude, once you start to realize

817
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:17,279
Speaker 2: that everything that you experience in this world is just

818
00:48:17,280 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 2: fucking chemicals and biology and stuff, you become numb to it.

819
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:27,160
Speaker 2: You become numb to pain, you become numb to love.

820
00:48:27,239 --> 00:48:30,600
Speaker 2: You realize love is a chemical that's bad. Though you

821
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:34,120
Speaker 2: shouldn't think like that. You should continue to believe in

822
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:38,319
Speaker 2: the beautiful magic of the universe, that it's not all

823
00:48:38,360 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 2: just chemicals. Ice cream, ice cream as a chemical, Okay, anyway,

824
00:48:43,320 --> 00:48:46,600
Speaker 2: that's pretty interesting. After that, I started to work on

825
00:48:46,719 --> 00:48:51,320
Speaker 2: avoiding the instinct to pull away immediately when something hurt,

826
00:48:51,560 --> 00:48:55,560
Speaker 2: and I calmed down and realized that even though it hurt,

827
00:48:55,680 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 2: I was fine, So I started seeing how far I

828
00:48:58,760 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 2: could push it by pinching myself and having my girlfriend

829
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:07,239
Speaker 2: pop pimples on my back. I usually pull away, but

830
00:49:07,360 --> 00:49:11,719
Speaker 2: this time I sat there still and calm. Overall, I

831
00:49:11,719 --> 00:49:14,400
Speaker 2: think this is a good thing. I have been avoiding

832
00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:17,279
Speaker 2: going to the dentist because I've been terrified that it

833
00:49:17,320 --> 00:49:20,400
Speaker 2: will hurt. I have had a cavity since I was

834
00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:26,600
Speaker 2: fourteen parentheses. I'm eighteen now, and I'm missing half my tooth. Surprisingly,

835
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:29,800
Speaker 2: it doesn't hurt yet, but it's been a huge source

836
00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:33,120
Speaker 2: of anxiety waiting to wake up in pain from an

837
00:49:33,120 --> 00:49:36,759
Speaker 2: abscessed tooth. But now I think I'm ready to go

838
00:49:36,800 --> 00:49:40,000
Speaker 2: get it pulled and move on. This has relieved a

839
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:42,239
Speaker 2: lot of stress for me, and I think it could

840
00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:45,319
Speaker 2: help others too. Just wanted to hear your thoughts on it.

841
00:49:45,680 --> 00:49:50,799
Speaker 2: Peace in love from Kentucky. Hold on, Brandon, I'm gonna

842
00:49:51,040 --> 00:49:55,600
Speaker 2: cough real quick. We can cut that out or we

843
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 2: can leave it in. Let's leave it in. It's okay

844
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:05,600
Speaker 2: to cough. We're keeping it real here. Okay, Yeah, this

845
00:50:05,680 --> 00:50:10,719
Speaker 2: is fascinating. You're basically just like, here's here's the thing. Honestly, Honestly, Ryan,

846
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:12,359
Speaker 2: I don't I don't think I buy this. I don't

847
00:50:12,400 --> 00:50:16,960
Speaker 2: think I buy this. I have tried myself to use

848
00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:22,640
Speaker 2: logic on the central nervous system, and it's not good.

849
00:50:22,680 --> 00:50:26,480
Speaker 2: Like I've like what you're describing. I think you're bullshitting

850
00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:29,960
Speaker 2: made because again, I've tried to use logic on the

851
00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:35,279
Speaker 2: central nervous system. You know, I've tried to tell myself logically,

852
00:50:36,160 --> 00:50:41,040
Speaker 2: I should not feel pain, I should not feel nervousness.

853
00:50:41,040 --> 00:50:42,920
Speaker 2: I should not feel this and that other thing. The

854
00:50:42,960 --> 00:50:47,960
Speaker 2: central nervous system does not care. You're telling me, you

855
00:50:48,640 --> 00:50:55,880
Speaker 2: told your central nervous system that logically, pain is just information,

856
00:50:57,360 --> 00:51:01,640
Speaker 2: and then it believed you, and then it's being painful.

857
00:51:04,280 --> 00:51:07,279
Speaker 2: I don't know if I believe that, but I mean,

858
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:11,640
Speaker 2: that's crazy. I don't think you're a masochist, though. I

859
00:51:11,640 --> 00:51:14,600
Speaker 2: don't think. None of this tells me that you're a masochist,

860
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:18,880
Speaker 2: just that you were able to reason with the central

861
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:22,040
Speaker 2: nervous system. But I don't know, man, I don't think

862
00:51:22,080 --> 00:51:25,719
Speaker 2: the central nervous system responds to logic like that. I

863
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:29,400
Speaker 2: think it just kind of makes stuff hurt. But uh,

864
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:32,120
Speaker 2: I don't know. You could probably be aud You could

865
00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:34,720
Speaker 2: be one of those like magician guys who like staple

866
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:40,120
Speaker 2: shit to their heads for money. You should, you should,

867
00:51:40,120 --> 00:51:41,799
Speaker 2: You should not go to college, and you should become

868
00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:43,920
Speaker 2: one of those magician guys that stable ship to their

869
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:49,799
Speaker 2: heads for money. That's my official take on this. Let's

870
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:59,120
Speaker 2: see here. This is from uh anonymous, hey gecko, emailing

871
00:51:59,120 --> 00:52:02,279
Speaker 2: with positivity to tell you how good my life is.

872
00:52:02,840 --> 00:52:06,200
Speaker 2: About five years ago, I quit all my shit to

873
00:52:06,239 --> 00:52:09,640
Speaker 2: become an artist. I moved into my parents' house and

874
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:13,600
Speaker 2: started working as a dishwasher in a restaurant. Previously, I

875
00:52:13,600 --> 00:52:16,439
Speaker 2: had been working in an office that paid semi well

876
00:52:16,719 --> 00:52:20,200
Speaker 2: and I lived independently. I hit a wall of boredom

877
00:52:20,480 --> 00:52:23,480
Speaker 2: with having money and sitting at a desk, and decided

878
00:52:23,520 --> 00:52:27,040
Speaker 2: that working fourteen hour shifts on the weekend washing pots

879
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:31,520
Speaker 2: was considerably more interesting. I had accepted being poor forever

880
00:52:31,920 --> 00:52:36,200
Speaker 2: and was almost looking forward to it. Weirdly, my plan worked,

881
00:52:36,520 --> 00:52:39,120
Speaker 2: and I've become a real artist. I went to art

882
00:52:39,200 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 2: school and learned a ton of skills which I would

883
00:52:42,040 --> 00:52:45,759
Speaker 2: have seriously struggled to teach myself. Through this, I found

884
00:52:45,800 --> 00:52:48,520
Speaker 2: a gallery that I am now represented by and show

885
00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 2: my work everywhere from New York to China. I do

886
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:54,440
Speaker 2: this full time and earn a pretty decent wage. I

887
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:59,640
Speaker 2: work most days, excluding Christmas funerals and shit. I love

888
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,160
Speaker 2: it so much. I always want to say that if

889
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:05,759
Speaker 2: someone gave me one billion pounds. This guy's from the UK,

890
00:53:07,480 --> 00:53:09,719
Speaker 2: the first thing I do tomorrow is go to the

891
00:53:09,760 --> 00:53:13,520
Speaker 2: studio and paint. This is true. Through hard work and luck,

892
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:16,040
Speaker 2: I've made the only life I would ever want to live.

893
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:20,879
Speaker 2: Every single day stimulates me, makes me truly happy and satisfied.

894
00:53:21,480 --> 00:53:24,759
Speaker 2: I wanted others to know that this is possible. Put

895
00:53:24,760 --> 00:53:28,839
Speaker 2: in enough work and everything will be fucking sound. You're

896
00:53:28,880 --> 00:53:31,960
Speaker 2: the man. I saw you live once in a northern

897
00:53:32,080 --> 00:53:37,000
Speaker 2: UK city. That'll be Belfast. It was ace all the

898
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:41,280
Speaker 2: best man, anonymous man. Hell yeah, I love seeing people

899
00:53:42,000 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 2: live in the dream. That's great. I love when when

900
00:53:46,080 --> 00:53:49,400
Speaker 2: a motherfucker can live the dream like this. This is awesome.

901
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:55,040
Speaker 2: Respect to you, anonymous artist man anyone. Yeah, that's a

902
00:53:55,040 --> 00:53:57,040
Speaker 2: good litmus test for if you love your life, like,

903
00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:01,440
Speaker 2: how much would a billion dollars change it? Still go

904
00:54:01,480 --> 00:54:09,719
Speaker 2: to the studio and paint. That's beautiful. Fuck you, dude,

905
00:54:09,719 --> 00:54:12,600
Speaker 2: what kind of art do you make? What do you do?

906
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:18,319
Speaker 2: What is this? Tell me more? Anonymous man, what are

907
00:54:18,320 --> 00:54:20,799
Speaker 2: you doing in China? I'm sorry. I wish I had better.

908
00:54:20,920 --> 00:54:22,759
Speaker 2: I wish I had more information to add to this,

909
00:54:23,680 --> 00:54:25,000
Speaker 2: but I just wanted to. I just wanted to hop

910
00:54:25,040 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 2: on here and read a few emails. I think that's it, folks.

911
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:34,879
Speaker 2: I'm Lyle, I'm a Gecko. Thank you guys for listening

912
00:54:34,920 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 2: to this podcast. I will be making more of them.

913
00:54:39,320 --> 00:54:43,719
Speaker 2: We will be having more phone calls. And uh, I

914
00:54:43,760 --> 00:54:47,880
Speaker 2: think I think things are going well. Let me know

915
00:54:47,880 --> 00:54:48,319
Speaker 2: if they're not.

916
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:49,640
Speaker 1: Let me know.

917
00:54:49,640 --> 00:54:52,440
Speaker 2: If you want me to start talking in a in

918
00:54:52,480 --> 00:54:56,960
Speaker 2: a stupid voice something like that, I could do that.

919
00:54:58,239 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 2: I could start talking in a I could do the

920
00:55:01,239 --> 00:55:02,840
Speaker 2: whole thing in a British accent. I could do the

921
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:07,800
Speaker 2: whole thing in like a Jamaican petois voice. Is I

922
00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:11,120
Speaker 2: how you say that? Petois? I'm probably not gonna do that,

923
00:55:11,200 --> 00:55:13,560
Speaker 2: but let me know if you want me to, and

924
00:55:13,640 --> 00:55:17,239
Speaker 2: I'll and I'll read and I'll read you saying that,

925
00:55:17,280 --> 00:55:22,399
Speaker 2: and I'll think about it. This was gek mail ghek

926
00:55:22,440 --> 00:55:26,279
Speaker 2: Bless you all, thanks for listening. See you guys around

927
00:55:26,320 --> 00:55:30,920
Speaker 2: the universecon goes on the line taking your phone calls

928
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:34,759
Speaker 2: every night, Deacon goes to his You're just teaching.

929
00:55:34,560 --> 00:55:36,040
Speaker 1: You a loud memory line.

930
00:55:36,719 --> 00:55:39,480
Speaker 2: He's not an expert.