WEBVTT - Toxic — Libby Caswell E4 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:03.320 Originals. 0:00:03.440 --> 0:00:10.760 This is an iHeart original. This story might be hard 0:00:10.760 --> 0:00:15.320 to hear. There's detailed talk of suicide and violence, but 0:00:15.400 --> 0:00:18.200 we think it's important not to gloss over the reality 0:00:18.360 --> 0:00:22.079 of what happened to Libby Caswell. Please take care while listening. 0:00:25.280 --> 0:00:28.479 I've read a few autopsy reports over the years, and 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:34.279 it's always a peculiar, disconcerting experience. They're written in dispassionate 0:00:34.360 --> 0:00:40.000 clinical language and yet are oddly intimate. For example, in 0:00:40.080 --> 0:00:43.400 Libby's nine page report, we learned that her right lung 0:00:43.640 --> 0:00:46.959 weighed ten grams more than her left. Her teeth were 0:00:46.960 --> 0:00:50.960 in good repair and appeared healthy. Old acne scars were 0:00:51.040 --> 0:00:55.760 visible on her forehead. Libby's autopsy was performed by doctor 0:00:55.880 --> 0:01:00.520 Robert Pyitek of the Jackson County Medical Examiner's Office the 0:01:00.600 --> 0:01:03.520 day after her body was discovered at the sports stadium 0:01:03.560 --> 0:01:08.559 in She still had Devon's belt around her neck. Doctor 0:01:08.640 --> 0:01:12.160 Pytak noted that Libby's neck was completely encircled with a 0:01:12.240 --> 0:01:16.480 mark called a ligature furrow, apparently caused by the belt 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:20.679 pressing into her skin. He also documented a number of 0:01:20.720 --> 0:01:25.920 other bruises and abrasions on Libby's throat, chest, back, and hands. 0:01:27.200 --> 0:01:30.839 The opinion section of the report is short and concise. 0:01:31.840 --> 0:01:35.720 Libby died of asphyxia a lack of oxygen, but doctor 0:01:35.800 --> 0:01:39.840 Pytak could not determine if Libby had hanged herself or 0:01:39.959 --> 0:01:42.880 was strangled by someone else, and so he left the 0:01:42.920 --> 0:01:52.920 manner of death undetermined. There's one more page of the autopsy, 0:01:53.920 --> 0:01:59.760 the results of Libby's post mortem toxicology report. Libby's blood 0:01:59.800 --> 0:02:04.360 was tested for certain substances like cocaine, which was negative, 0:02:04.960 --> 0:02:09.760 and alcohol, which was negligible. But one drug did show 0:02:09.880 --> 0:02:13.240 up at the time of her death. Libby had a 0:02:13.320 --> 0:02:16.080 high level of methamphetamine in her body. 0:02:16.639 --> 0:02:19.240 You know, she was found with a toxing amount of 0:02:19.520 --> 0:02:23.840 math in her system, and so I struggled with that 0:02:24.040 --> 0:02:25.240 when I got that report. 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:31.000 Meth didn't literally kill Libby, but as I discovered reporting 0:02:31.040 --> 0:02:34.120 the story, it was a big part of her undoing 0:02:35.280 --> 0:02:38.240 as a fun through wine. 0:02:43.040 --> 0:02:44.400 Sod is She. 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:53.560 From iHeart Podcasts. I'm Melissa Jelson, and this is what 0:02:53.760 --> 0:02:55.200 happened to Libby Caswell. 0:02:55.680 --> 0:02:58.520 When I walked past, I saw him roll her to 0:02:58.639 --> 0:03:01.000 the side and just punch your really hard in the thigh. 0:03:01.440 --> 0:03:03.880 I was like, kind of like what I did? 0:03:03.919 --> 0:03:07.800 He just hit her, but just the rest a little bit. 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:12.720 Did something bad happened that thanks kind of out of control? 0:03:13.240 --> 0:03:18.240 No, sir, positive that promise. 0:03:19.840 --> 0:03:21.760 He would laugh and say that you're never going to 0:03:21.840 --> 0:03:26.640 catch me. I am too smart for them, And yeah, 0:03:26.960 --> 0:03:27.880 he'd just run off. 0:03:29.120 --> 0:03:31.080 You know, I couldn't be there could be a thousand. 0:03:31.200 --> 0:03:34.400 Maybe I should, but that didn't. What happened. 0:03:40.160 --> 0:03:59.840 A chapter four talk. 0:04:03.120 --> 0:04:07.760 I knew you know a lot about marijuana growing up, 0:04:07.840 --> 0:04:11.720 but I'd never heard about meth amphetamine because we didn't 0:04:11.720 --> 0:04:13.560 know anything about that kind of stuff. 0:04:14.320 --> 0:04:17.919 Cindy Libby's mom isn't what I would call a partier. 0:04:18.800 --> 0:04:22.600 She rarely drinks, doesn't smoke cigarettes, and would rather watch 0:04:22.720 --> 0:04:26.240 TV than stay out late. She told me that recently 0:04:26.600 --> 0:04:30.360 she began using legal marijuana edibles to help with the 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:33.520 dread and anxiety that surfaces when she tries to sleep 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:37.360 at night. But although Cindy didn't have any personal experience 0:04:37.440 --> 0:04:40.400 with meth a highly addictive drug that can be made 0:04:40.440 --> 0:04:43.560 with household chemicals. The town she raised her family and 0:04:43.880 --> 0:04:47.719 did in the nineteen nineties, Around the same time Cindy 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:52.800 started having kids, Missouri and Independence in particular became a 0:04:52.920 --> 0:04:57.720 hotbed of meth production. In nineteen ninety six, alone, authorities 0:04:57.760 --> 0:05:02.120 busted seventy five meth labs in Dependence, the largest number 0:05:02.279 --> 0:05:06.240 per capita in the nation. This prompted the Christian Science 0:05:06.360 --> 0:05:09.120 Monitor to dub it the quote meth capital of the 0:05:09.279 --> 0:05:13.480 United States. Rolling Stone later ran a feature story on 0:05:13.640 --> 0:05:19.800 Independence called Postcards from Tweakville that solidified its reputation as 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:24.200 a meth haven. Fox News ran a national story that 0:05:24.360 --> 0:05:27.960 shined the spotlight on meth and the Independence Police Department. 0:05:28.520 --> 0:05:32.000 How bad is the myth problem an Independence, Missouri? 0:05:32.080 --> 0:05:32.839 And it's bad. 0:05:34.200 --> 0:05:35.280 We've got a major epidemic. 0:05:36.240 --> 0:05:39.359 For the next decade or so, meth continued to dominate 0:05:39.440 --> 0:05:42.359 local headlines and shape the workings of the police. 0:05:42.800 --> 0:05:46.560 Every night, Independence police make at least three arrests related 0:05:46.600 --> 0:05:47.200 to methews. 0:05:47.520 --> 0:05:51.320 They wont ipd solicited help from the community, and positioned 0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:53.760 itself as the best solution to the problem. 0:05:54.040 --> 0:05:54.560 To stop the. 0:05:54.600 --> 0:05:58.120 Cycle, Independence police are asking residents and business owners to 0:05:58.240 --> 0:06:00.599 call police about suspicious drug activity. 0:06:01.360 --> 0:06:03.839 And while the labs were mostly busted by the time 0:06:03.960 --> 0:06:06.720 Libby and Devon were in high school, the town was 0:06:06.760 --> 0:06:11.240 still sometimes disparagingly referred to as meth dependents, and the 0:06:11.320 --> 0:06:14.680 drug it was still pretty easy to find. I don't 0:06:14.720 --> 0:06:17.880 know for sure what year Libby first tried meth, but 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:21.080 by her friend's accounts, it took place in high school 0:06:21.440 --> 0:06:24.839 sometime after Zave was born, and it was her boyfriend 0:06:24.920 --> 0:06:27.000 Devin who introduced her to the drug. 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:32.240 He had started dabbling and drug like harder drugs than 0:06:33.120 --> 0:06:35.479 what any seventeen year old s could be doing. 0:06:36.000 --> 0:06:37.880 Holly, Libby's high school friend. 0:06:38.080 --> 0:06:38.719 It wasn't just the. 0:06:38.720 --> 0:06:41.040 Weed that he was, you know, smoking, and I think 0:06:41.200 --> 0:06:45.680 that's whenever he had actually started doing meth, and then 0:06:45.920 --> 0:06:48.560 he got Libby on it. She said that, you know, 0:06:48.680 --> 0:06:51.640 he kind of peer pressured her into trying it because 0:06:51.680 --> 0:06:53.160 they were in front of you know, a bunch of 0:06:53.200 --> 0:06:53.760 head spreads. 0:06:54.040 --> 0:06:56.240 I mean, I didn't think she knew about alcohol by 0:06:56.240 --> 0:06:58.400 the time she met him, and then she knew. She 0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:02.440 met him, she knew every drug, every pill, every drink everything. 0:07:03.480 --> 0:07:07.000 Nathan was childhood friends with Libby and later became friends 0:07:07.040 --> 0:07:09.880 with Devin too. He told me they would all sometimes 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:11.200 get high on meth together. 0:07:11.600 --> 0:07:13.480 For Libby, I think it just made her more sociable. 0:07:14.120 --> 0:07:16.440 I think that we both always agreed that we liked 0:07:16.440 --> 0:07:19.560 the rush of it. Russia gave us. That's what I like, 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:22.440 not that, And I like the fact that like whenever 0:07:22.560 --> 0:07:25.800 I did it, you know, I you know, could go 0:07:25.920 --> 0:07:29.440 in public, I could, I could basically accomplish anythings what 0:07:29.520 --> 0:07:30.280 it made me feel like. 0:07:30.800 --> 0:07:33.800 As Nathan saw it, Libby used meth to boost her 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:37.760 confidence and maybe also to fit into Devon's social circle. 0:07:38.640 --> 0:07:41.280 This new part of her life. She kept it secret 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:44.320 from her family and even many of her close friends. 0:07:45.280 --> 0:07:46.200 Here's Holly again. 0:07:46.560 --> 0:07:48.240 She didn't tell me about the first time. 0:07:48.360 --> 0:07:50.200 I mean, she just kind of goes to me for 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:50.640 a while. 0:07:51.080 --> 0:07:53.320 I knew she was doing something, but she just wouldn't 0:07:53.360 --> 0:07:56.800 admit it to me at first. And she just finally 0:07:56.840 --> 0:07:59.680 broke down one day and she's like, I don't know 0:07:59.720 --> 0:08:00.600 what to do anymore. 0:08:02.560 --> 0:08:05.560 And here's where I believe Libby's life split in two, 0:08:06.360 --> 0:08:09.320 the bright social side that she presented to her friends 0:08:09.400 --> 0:08:13.080 and family and the darker, drug consumed side that she 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:16.840 kept hidden. But with a drug like meth, it's not 0:08:17.040 --> 0:08:19.840 so easy to conceal its effects from those who really 0:08:19.960 --> 0:08:23.320 know you, and her family soon began to suspect something 0:08:23.480 --> 0:08:26.760 was going on. Here's Natalie, her younger sister. 0:08:27.080 --> 0:08:31.640 Her whole face would just completely change and she would 0:08:31.720 --> 0:08:36.760 be like just not herself. She was always like this 0:08:36.960 --> 0:08:41.200 really bubbly, happy, talkative person, and then when we would 0:08:41.200 --> 0:08:44.679 go see her, she was just like depressed and angry 0:08:44.960 --> 0:08:49.320 and irritable, and so it was like a completely different person. 0:08:50.160 --> 0:08:52.839 And that's how we started to recognize when she was 0:08:52.960 --> 0:08:53.520 on and off. 0:08:54.360 --> 0:08:58.040 Cindy started to notice something was wrong when Libby, already 0:08:58.160 --> 0:09:00.400 lean rapidly lost a lot of wait. 0:09:00.760 --> 0:09:03.760 I said, Libby, I'm so worried about you. You look 0:09:03.880 --> 0:09:07.160 like a skeleton. You know, are you eating? What's happening? 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:09.480 And what was it like for you to see your 0:09:09.559 --> 0:09:11.040 daughter in that situation? 0:09:11.520 --> 0:09:12.120 It was bad. 0:09:12.280 --> 0:09:15.000 It was just devastating. I would leave here and cry. 0:09:21.320 --> 0:09:24.439 Libby and Devon would use together on and off again 0:09:25.080 --> 0:09:28.360 from around the age of seventeen until Libby's death at 0:09:28.440 --> 0:09:33.160 twenty one. Their drug use pushed their relationship even more 0:09:33.200 --> 0:09:37.920 into the shadows, away from others. Probing eyes and Libby's 0:09:37.960 --> 0:09:41.600 friends tell me, the more Devin used drugs, the more 0:09:41.720 --> 0:09:42.559 violent he became. 0:09:43.400 --> 0:09:49.920 She told me that when they would get in fights 0:09:49.960 --> 0:09:52.240 and it would be really bad. He would push her, 0:09:53.640 --> 0:09:56.320 hold her down and choke her, and. 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:58.360 He would do it in front of their kids. 0:10:00.160 --> 0:10:02.679 When he was on drugs, he was really cool. That's 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:05.719 how we quit. But then you know, he was doing 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:07.400 drugs and he was one of those people that stayed 0:10:07.480 --> 0:10:09.240 up for like a week, and when you do that, 0:10:09.400 --> 0:10:13.320 you get crazy, you know. So he was always paranoid. 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:16.880 He's always angry, violent. He really went off the rails 0:10:16.960 --> 0:10:19.319 that met. Like some people go off the rails, some 0:10:19.400 --> 0:10:19.960 people don't. 0:10:22.000 --> 0:10:25.120 There's a lot of alarmist rhetoric around meth users that 0:10:25.200 --> 0:10:30.280 they're unhinged, psychotic, and deeply dangerous. Take this Fox News 0:10:30.320 --> 0:10:34.880 clip from the nineties and where meth goes death violence. 0:10:35.040 --> 0:10:36.360 I'm talking about a drug. 0:10:36.200 --> 0:10:41.079 That induces violent behavior, that creates violence in people who 0:10:41.160 --> 0:10:43.320 never have been violent, wouldn't think of being violent. 0:10:44.400 --> 0:10:47.480 This is still a common stereotype about people who use 0:10:47.600 --> 0:10:50.440 meth and other drugs too, that they are more likely 0:10:50.559 --> 0:10:54.600 to be violent, and specifically violent towards the people closest 0:10:54.600 --> 0:10:54.920 to them. 0:10:55.200 --> 0:10:58.720 Not everyone who abuses substance is a domestic balance offender. 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:01.600 I think the important thing to remembers it doesn't cause 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:04.600 the abuse, but it definitely complicates abuse. 0:11:05.200 --> 0:11:09.079 Mariann Metheni is the CEO of the Hope House, a 0:11:09.160 --> 0:11:14.120 domestic violence agency that covers the Kansas City area, including Independence. 0:11:14.880 --> 0:11:20.280 She has seen firsthand the complicated, interconnected relationship between drugs 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:24.600 and domestic violence, how drugs can hypercharge abuse that. 0:11:24.679 --> 0:11:28.520 Can take a situation into a more violent level much 0:11:28.559 --> 0:11:31.640 more quickly when someone is intoxicated. 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:34.880 And how drug use can isolate victims even further. 0:11:35.360 --> 0:11:38.600 I think where it gets difficult and it's really hard 0:11:38.640 --> 0:11:42.000 for people to understand is that it is an unpallenge 0:11:42.040 --> 0:11:45.800 for the victim and to also be someone who uses substances. 0:11:46.360 --> 0:11:48.600 It can be a way to deal with what's going 0:11:48.679 --> 0:11:51.920 on and trying to escape for just a little while, 0:11:52.000 --> 0:11:54.559 like my world is falling apart, it's easier for me 0:11:54.679 --> 0:11:58.240 to use. The other piece is that it's often used 0:11:58.400 --> 0:12:01.640 as a control mechanism by the abuser as well. But 0:12:01.640 --> 0:12:05.000 it's not uncommon for an abuser to force someone to 0:12:05.240 --> 0:12:08.600 use at the same time that they're using, and then 0:12:09.000 --> 0:12:12.480 becoming addicted becomes just part of that whole relationship. 0:12:13.080 --> 0:12:17.040 Mathemei has observed how abusers often blame drugs and alcohol 0:12:17.360 --> 0:12:20.959 for their own bad behavior. I'm not abusive, I was 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:25.480 just high. Victims may desperately want to believe this narrative too. 0:12:25.679 --> 0:12:30.400 Because it's easier in your mind to rationalize this atrocity 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:33.360 of behaviors that's happening to you, because otherwise you have 0:12:33.440 --> 0:12:35.640 to look at this person and say, but you really 0:12:36.040 --> 0:12:38.280 don't care about me if you're going to abuse me, 0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:42.040 Because the reality is a person would have been doing 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:44.760 those things to you even if they were sober, because 0:12:45.120 --> 0:12:47.000 we know that substances don't cause it. 0:12:48.800 --> 0:12:51.040 I don't want to give the impression that drug used 0:12:51.080 --> 0:12:54.839 defined Libby's life. She quit using on a number of 0:12:54.920 --> 0:12:59.000 occasions and had long prosperous spells where she was clean 0:12:59.120 --> 0:13:03.959 and sober. These periods, they tended to coincide with times 0:13:04.000 --> 0:13:04.880 when she broke. 0:13:04.720 --> 0:13:07.240 Up with Devon, and that's whenever Libby was really her 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:10.640 best is when Devin wasn't around. She could see her 0:13:10.720 --> 0:13:12.400 full potential, but. 0:13:12.520 --> 0:13:16.720 Inevitably he would re enter the picture. Libby's friends Autumna 0:13:16.800 --> 0:13:19.800 Mariah explained to me what that cycle looks like. 0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:22.040 Libby was almost like a dog on a leash, like 0:13:22.160 --> 0:13:25.280 she could only get so far from Devon before here 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:27.480 comes Devon or here comes Devin's call. 0:13:28.080 --> 0:13:29.920 He would come back when he was sober. 0:13:30.360 --> 0:13:32.559 He would convince everybody. He's gonna do the right thing, 0:13:32.640 --> 0:13:34.640 you know, and treat her right, and treat Zab right. 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:38.800 He would love bomb her and give her everything, tell 0:13:38.840 --> 0:13:42.199 her whatever she wanted, and all she wanted was to 0:13:42.320 --> 0:13:46.400 be a family with the father of her child, and 0:13:46.559 --> 0:13:47.599 he would promise her that. 0:13:48.559 --> 0:13:51.240 That's pretty much how Libby always got looped back into 0:13:51.320 --> 0:13:53.559 the cycle, as how he claimed he'd be a good 0:13:53.640 --> 0:13:55.679 dad this time around. You know, Zab needs a dad. 0:13:55.720 --> 0:13:58.520 Blah blah blah blah blah, the whole good dad game. 0:13:59.120 --> 0:14:03.240 Sometimes they would be good for months. He wouldn't hurt her, 0:14:03.480 --> 0:14:08.160 they wouldn't use drugs, they would be clean and happy 0:14:08.360 --> 0:14:14.400 and healthy. And then the newness and him trying starts. 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:18.319 To wear off, and he would get mean again, and 0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:21.080 then he would go out and use drugs, and then 0:14:21.480 --> 0:14:25.520 she would end up using as well, because I mean, 0:14:25.840 --> 0:14:30.160 her partner's out there doing everything and being abusive to her. 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:33.320 And how many times you estimate that this happened while 0:14:33.360 --> 0:14:34.000 you knew her. 0:14:34.600 --> 0:14:38.200 In the couple of years, probably like three or four. 0:14:40.000 --> 0:14:42.240 I know she always felt like when. 0:14:42.160 --> 0:14:44.880 She had nothing less like that's what she had was 0:14:46.600 --> 0:14:51.840 him and drugs, and she would just keep keep going 0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:54.440 back until she got her feet under her again, and 0:14:54.600 --> 0:14:58.200 she'd kick him and kick the drugs and be happy 0:14:58.280 --> 0:14:59.800 and healthy and sober by herself. 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:15.800 Here, Menny, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, 0:15:17.080 --> 0:15:19.360 Happy birthday year. 0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:20.080 Save. 0:15:21.360 --> 0:15:23.680 Half birthday to you. 0:15:24.320 --> 0:15:26.560 Flow your candles, load a candle fire. 0:15:29.800 --> 0:15:30.040 Yeah. 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:36.600 Do you want a piece of the Batman cake. 0:15:38.160 --> 0:15:38.440 Cake? 0:15:38.960 --> 0:15:39.200 Yeah? 0:15:40.360 --> 0:15:42.640 Okay, okay, I'm gonna give you some hand on. 0:15:43.720 --> 0:15:48.040 It's the beginning of May twenty seventeen. Zave is turning four. 0:15:49.080 --> 0:15:51.920 Libby bake's in a chocolate cake decorated with a blue 0:15:51.960 --> 0:15:56.960 and gold Batman symbol. It looks professional Cindy would be proud. 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:02.400 In the video, Libby appears happy and carefree, a mom 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:06.280 trying to make her son's birthday special, but really she's 0:16:06.320 --> 0:16:09.480 putting on a brave face. Just a few days earlier, 0:16:09.920 --> 0:16:13.040 she and Devin broke up once again, and this time 0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:16.040 when he left, he took the car she used to 0:16:16.080 --> 0:16:19.400 get to work and drained their joint bank account, leaving 0:16:19.480 --> 0:16:23.400 her stranded and broke right before reent was due. Libby 0:16:23.560 --> 0:16:28.600 was sad and understandably furious, but stealing with something Devin 0:16:28.760 --> 0:16:31.280 was known to do when he was using he stole 0:16:31.320 --> 0:16:35.720 from strangers, friends, and now the woman he claimed to love. 0:16:36.600 --> 0:16:40.240 A few weeks later, Devin's reckless behavior caught up to him. 0:16:40.720 --> 0:16:44.360 He was arrested and charged with burglarizing someone's apartment. He 0:16:44.520 --> 0:16:47.840 ended up spending most of the summer behind bars. It 0:16:47.960 --> 0:16:50.520 was a long time to be away from Libby. By 0:16:50.600 --> 0:16:54.200 my estimate, this was the longest separation that had in years, 0:16:55.440 --> 0:16:59.240 and for Libby this was a complicated period. She was 0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:01.440 grieving the law loss of the life. She was trying 0:17:01.520 --> 0:17:05.919 to build a family with Devon and Zave, but Devn's 0:17:05.960 --> 0:17:11.480 incarceration allowed her enough space, both mental and physical, to 0:17:11.640 --> 0:17:13.439 start reimagining her future. 0:17:14.600 --> 0:17:18.600 She was always out going, you know, and happy that 0:17:19.720 --> 0:17:23.639 she also was a little stressed because she was trying 0:17:23.680 --> 0:17:24.840 to do everything on her own. 0:17:25.840 --> 0:17:28.560 With Devon out of the picture, Libby began to re 0:17:28.760 --> 0:17:33.639 establish relationships with people should cut off, especially her mom Cindy. 0:17:34.119 --> 0:17:37.120 We would make dinners and we had one of those 0:17:37.200 --> 0:17:40.960 speakers that hipped up to the bluetooth and we'd take 0:17:41.040 --> 0:17:42.600 her and spicking out songs. 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:46.439 You know, and playing music. That summer, Libby kept herself 0:17:46.520 --> 0:17:50.639 busy between visits with family, looking after Zaev, and a 0:17:50.720 --> 0:17:53.200 new job at the mall food court, where she got 0:17:53.240 --> 0:17:55.360 to work beside her friend Mariah. 0:17:56.400 --> 0:17:57.600 Oh was there recording yep. 0:17:58.200 --> 0:17:59.960 This is a clip of them walking from the park 0:18:00.000 --> 0:18:02.879 working a lot to the mall entrance, already dressed in 0:18:02.960 --> 0:18:07.680 their uniforms for the day. The person making that whoo 0:18:08.200 --> 0:18:13.159 sound that's Libby in this video. She's laughing, mugging for 0:18:13.280 --> 0:18:16.520 the camera, a pretty normal twenty one year old on 0:18:16.600 --> 0:18:19.000 her way to a summer job. She worked right next 0:18:19.080 --> 0:18:19.359 door to me. 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:21.560 We would take our breaks in the hallway together. 0:18:22.240 --> 0:18:23.880 We would talk all day during work. 0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:26.400 I mean, our managers hated that we worked right next 0:18:26.520 --> 0:18:31.280 to each other. We were constantly talking, constantly causing chaos together. 0:18:31.720 --> 0:18:35.320 We would hang out outside of work almost every day, 0:18:35.359 --> 0:18:36.440 if not every weekend. 0:18:37.800 --> 0:18:41.960 Mariah's strongest memory of Libby this summer. The last summer 0:18:42.000 --> 0:18:44.520 of Libby's life, was the day she showed up at 0:18:44.560 --> 0:18:47.680 the mall to return the engagement ring Devin had given 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:48.960 her that past Christmas. 0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:52.480 I'll never forget. She called me in a super good mood, 0:18:52.520 --> 0:18:53.760 saying that she's on the way up to the mall, 0:18:53.800 --> 0:18:55.080 but it was her day off and she wanted me 0:18:55.160 --> 0:18:57.440 to come out and walk inside with her. She was 0:18:57.560 --> 0:18:59.760 just being She came up to the mall to a 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:02.720 exchange and get her money back for the ring that 0:19:02.800 --> 0:19:04.359 Devin had bought her, and she said she. 0:19:04.440 --> 0:19:06.440 Was going to be moving on. She told me like 0:19:06.560 --> 0:19:08.400 she was done, done going back and forth. 0:19:08.520 --> 0:19:10.240 She's finally going to do what she needed to do 0:19:10.400 --> 0:19:12.639 for her and she was finally turning a page. 0:19:16.440 --> 0:19:21.120 Many people do successfully get out of abusive relationships. I've 0:19:21.200 --> 0:19:24.960 met a lot of them, heard their stories. Rarely does 0:19:25.000 --> 0:19:27.879 it happen on the first try, or even the second 0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:31.720 or the third. In my opinion, the cycle that Libby 0:19:31.800 --> 0:19:35.600 went through clean and single, using and back with Devon, 0:19:36.359 --> 0:19:40.080 that was her process of trying to leave. Because leaving 0:19:40.760 --> 0:19:45.040 is a process. It takes time and resources and support 0:19:45.920 --> 0:19:49.040 and a hell of a lot of courage. And that 0:19:49.240 --> 0:19:53.280 summer of twenty seventeen seemed like a turning point for Libby. 0:19:54.320 --> 0:20:00.040 She was building a new foundation for her life. But 0:20:00.119 --> 0:20:02.560 it wouldn't it turned out be enough. 0:20:03.000 --> 0:20:05.200 As soon as Devin came back into the picture. She 0:20:05.320 --> 0:20:09.280 lost her car, her apartment, her job, everything, you know. 0:20:09.359 --> 0:20:11.520 The only thing she was still hanging on to was 0:20:11.560 --> 0:20:12.400 her sobriety. 0:20:15.000 --> 0:20:19.040 Devin is released from jail in mid July. Almost immediately, 0:20:19.400 --> 0:20:22.359 he tries to get back into Libby's life, calling and 0:20:22.480 --> 0:20:27.840 coming by her apartment. Libby resists, stays vigilant. She never 0:20:27.960 --> 0:20:29.320 knew when Devin was watching. 0:20:29.760 --> 0:20:32.359 I can't tell you a single time at night that 0:20:32.440 --> 0:20:35.040 she'd ever have her blinds up, and she always was 0:20:35.080 --> 0:20:36.600 looking over her shoulder always. 0:20:37.320 --> 0:20:40.440 When Devin fails to get Libby's attention, he posts on 0:20:40.640 --> 0:20:43.720 Facebook about how she was stopping him from being the 0:20:43.800 --> 0:20:47.720 good dad he yearned to be. Quote, Daddy has a 0:20:47.760 --> 0:20:49.920 big boy and it's killing him not to be able 0:20:49.960 --> 0:20:53.800 to see him. Libby, please just be grown about all this. Please, 0:20:54.520 --> 0:20:56.600 It's not his fault that we can't seem to stay 0:20:56.640 --> 0:20:59.879 in cahoots with one another. To all the mothers out there, 0:21:00.200 --> 0:21:03.960 let your child be in the father's life. His next 0:21:04.080 --> 0:21:08.560 post turns angry. I'm about to snap like a slim gem. 0:21:08.960 --> 0:21:13.080 Can't believe the choices that she's making. WTF she won't 0:21:13.119 --> 0:21:18.240 answer my calls. I don't know how Libby responded to 0:21:18.320 --> 0:21:21.879 Devin's aggressive please, because she didn't share any of this 0:21:22.080 --> 0:21:27.200 with her family. Here's Cindy. 0:21:28.040 --> 0:21:30.320 She didn't tell me a lot of stuff because she 0:21:30.400 --> 0:21:32.600 knew I would be mad if she was talking to 0:21:33.480 --> 0:21:35.440 I think she was ashamed of it, you know, like 0:21:36.200 --> 0:21:37.719 after everything he had done to her. 0:21:38.800 --> 0:21:41.919 The close bonds that Cindy and Libby rebuilt that summer 0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:43.960 disappears pretty quickly. 0:21:44.600 --> 0:21:48.879 I started not being able to really talk to her, 0:21:49.240 --> 0:21:55.199 Like I noticed less contact with me, only like about Xavier. 0:21:55.280 --> 0:21:58.520 And when we had to have contact, I was calling 0:21:58.600 --> 0:22:01.240 her and texting her where are you? 0:22:02.359 --> 0:22:02.560 You know. 0:22:05.720 --> 0:22:06.560 I need to talk to you. 0:22:08.040 --> 0:22:11.360 Cindy had been here before. She knew what it meant 0:22:11.440 --> 0:22:14.840 when Libby went silent. It meant Devon was back in 0:22:14.920 --> 0:22:25.960 Libby's life, and probably meth was too. Cindy knew Libby 0:22:26.119 --> 0:22:29.800 was back with Devon and using, and she felt powerless, 0:22:30.280 --> 0:22:35.199 unable to help this situation. It might sound familiar if 0:22:35.240 --> 0:22:38.119 you have a family member who struggles with substance abuse. 0:22:38.920 --> 0:22:41.320 It can be impossible to know the right thing to do, 0:22:42.160 --> 0:22:45.000 how to support your loved one without feeling like you're 0:22:45.119 --> 0:22:49.000 enabling their drug use or punishing them when they're already 0:22:49.119 --> 0:22:53.800 so low and practically there's very few options and not 0:22:53.920 --> 0:22:58.600 a lot of resources for families going through this. Cindy's 0:22:58.720 --> 0:23:02.680 overriding concern is her daughter's safety and the safety of 0:23:02.760 --> 0:23:06.280 her grandson, Xavier. She's worried that he might be being 0:23:06.400 --> 0:23:11.200 left unsupervised, and so she takes a quote tough love approach. 0:23:11.960 --> 0:23:16.920 On September seventh, twenty seventeen, she calls Missouri's child welfare 0:23:16.960 --> 0:23:20.760 hotline to report that she believes Xavier is living in 0:23:20.800 --> 0:23:22.840 a home where drugs are being used. 0:23:23.600 --> 0:23:24.879 I felt horrible at first. 0:23:25.000 --> 0:23:28.359 I was just really down about that. But I was 0:23:28.440 --> 0:23:32.160 also conflicted because I thought, this is exactly what needs 0:23:32.240 --> 0:23:36.040 to happen. She needs to have this accountability and make 0:23:36.119 --> 0:23:40.640 it serious, like you're gonna lose your child over this guy. 0:23:41.080 --> 0:23:41.280 You know. 0:23:42.640 --> 0:23:48.119 The repercussions are swift and severe. Almost immediately, Xavier is 0:23:48.200 --> 0:23:52.320 placed into temporary custody with Cindy. Libya is assigned a 0:23:52.400 --> 0:23:55.880 case manager, and the state lays out of plan. If 0:23:55.920 --> 0:23:58.800 she wants to regain custody of her son, she has 0:23:58.880 --> 0:24:02.000 to prove she's a respectible mother, and a big part 0:24:02.080 --> 0:24:05.480 of that is getting clean. She's required to do random 0:24:05.560 --> 0:24:08.960 drug tests, to participate in meetings with a social worker, 0:24:09.440 --> 0:24:12.760 and to go to court regularly. She has also allotted 0:24:12.920 --> 0:24:16.840 a weekly visit with Zev overseen by Colleen Huff, a 0:24:16.920 --> 0:24:18.320