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Speaker 1: Hi everybody. While I'm taking the month of September off

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Speaker 1: of doing stand up, I return on October one to

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Speaker 1: complete my Vaccinated and Horny tour. October, November, and December,

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Speaker 1: I have new dates up. I kick it off in Saratoga, California,

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Speaker 1: and I'm coming to all parts of California, Long Beach,

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Speaker 1: Baker's Field. I'm going to Niagara Falls, Tucson, Arizona, Colorado, Minneapolis,

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Speaker 1: San Diego, Reading, Pennsylvania, and Baltimore, Maryland, just to name

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Speaker 1: a few. There's also some Floridian dates in there, since

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Speaker 1: this will be my last year that I'm able to

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Speaker 1: go inside the state of Florida. So check out Chelsea

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Speaker 1: handler dot com for more stand up dates for my

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Speaker 1: Vaccinated in Horny Tour. These are my last dates. Hi Catherine,

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Speaker 1: Hi Chelsea. Hi. How's it going. Oh, it's going so well.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited for our guest today. I know I'm

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Speaker 1: excited for her too. She's a real piece of work.

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Speaker 1: I just want you to know that I saw I

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Speaker 1: went way all watching yesterday, which was I did. But

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Speaker 1: I think next time it has to be a private affair.

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Speaker 1: You know. I don't know why we get on these

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Speaker 1: boats and then you're stuck on these boats for like

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Speaker 1: four hours with a bunch of other people. We did

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Speaker 1: see an orca and we saw a humpback and that

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Speaker 1: was really really cool. Yeah, but yeah, they're they're too long.

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Speaker 1: Everybody's every I find all activities to be one hour

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Speaker 1: too long. Like everything needs to be condensed, you know,

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Speaker 1: Like I don't want to be out on a boat

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Speaker 1: for three and a half hours. I want to be

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Speaker 1: out on the boat for two and a half hours. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that feels about right. My only question is like, you've

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Speaker 1: got to have time enough to find those whales. I

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Speaker 1: guess right, Well, they're all there. They're all there because

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Speaker 1: in this season, I mean, they guarantee a site a

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Speaker 1: whale sighting, and yeah they did, and we we saw one,

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Speaker 1: like within twenty minutes, we saw a huge humpback that

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Speaker 1: was playing with the log. It was so cute. I

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Speaker 1: mean if I were in the water and I saw

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Speaker 1: a humpback swimming towards me, I think I would pass

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Speaker 1: out from the sheer. Well. I mean, they are so massive.

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Speaker 1: The orcas are not as big as I thought they were,

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Speaker 1: but not that I'm in the water with them. But

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Speaker 1: you know, those humpbacks are just and the gray whales

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Speaker 1: are so big. Oh they're so beautiful, because that's the

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Speaker 1: only thing we're used to seeing, right, is those orcas

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Speaker 1: that are at you know, sea World, and those poor

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Speaker 1: things when you see them out in the free ocean,

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Speaker 1: swimming wherever the funk they feel like it, and then

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Speaker 1: you see them stuck. I mean, no wonder orcas are

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Speaker 1: killing people inside zoos or whatever the marine parks, right,

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Speaker 1: But apparently orcas are like horrible assholes. I you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't smoke a lot of pop, but when I do,

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Speaker 1: I like to put on what I call ocean show,

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Speaker 1: which is you know, nature ocean documentaries. And I saw

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Speaker 1: one and it was like, these orcas just like bombarded

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Speaker 1: a nice other whale and her baby and killed the baby,

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Speaker 1: drowned it, baby beluga. They drowned baby beluga and then

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Speaker 1: they just left it like it wasn't even for eating,

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Speaker 1: it was for sports. Yet they're the top of the

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Speaker 1: food chain. Yeah they're mean. I mean that's because they're

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Speaker 1: at the top of the food chain. They didn't get

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Speaker 1: there by accident. But yeah, that's really horrifying to kill

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Speaker 1: your little baby. Because whales have emotions, you know, they're

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Speaker 1: like highly emotional, so if they lose like a family member.

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Speaker 1: Remember there was that whale. It was like kind of recently,

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Speaker 1: but I have no sense of time, so it could

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Speaker 1: have been six years ago or six months, but that

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Speaker 1: was she lost her baby. Her baby died. She had

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Speaker 1: just stated it for like eighteen months, and then the

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Speaker 1: baby was born and she swam around with it for

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Speaker 1: months because she was mourning the loss of it. Right exactly,

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Speaker 1: this is what Orca's are doing. She should have called

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Speaker 1: into the podcast. We are going to take a quick

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Speaker 1: break so you can hear and add and then we'll

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Speaker 1: be right back. Let's move on to our guest. Her

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Speaker 1: name is Jamie Greenberg. She's my personal makeup artist. She

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Speaker 1: travels with me a lot around the country, sometimes on tour,

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Speaker 1: sometimes for other stuff. We're very good friends. And she

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Speaker 1: likes to show me her ass, her boobs. Actually I've

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Speaker 1: never seen her Pikachu, and I would like to say

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Speaker 1: thank you for the hello, Jamie. Jamie's my makeup artist,

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Speaker 1: and she is a mother of three children, and she

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Speaker 1: has a husband. His name is Josh Hi Josh. He

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Speaker 1: just celebrated his sixty five birthday. Now, yeah, anyway, Jamie

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Speaker 1: has been an absenteem mother for the last six months.

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Speaker 1: I have no friends who are parents who are with

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Speaker 1: their children less than Jamie Greenberg. But when she is

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Speaker 1: with them, she is on the sidelines of a softball game,

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Speaker 1: fucking screaming and yelling like a lunatic. Because she's one

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Speaker 1: of those parents. I am a softball mom, and I

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Speaker 1: will cut a bit or pop attire and her son.

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Speaker 1: Tell the quick story about your son when he didn't

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Speaker 1: want to play with the extra basketball the like the

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Speaker 1: game when he they asked him to play with the

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Speaker 1: better team. Her sons seven. Okay, he's seven, and he

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Speaker 1: started basketball and he was pretty good. He's showing promise.

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Speaker 1: My husband was an athlete. I was an athlete. He

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Speaker 1: starts dribbling and one of the coaches says, can he

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Speaker 1: stay and play with us with the older kids. Meanwhile,

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Speaker 1: he's seven. In the old kids were eight. You don't

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Speaker 1: have to suck on the microphone. Okay. I haven't seen

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Speaker 1: my husband in a while, either, Okay, okay, because that's

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Speaker 1: what you're doing when you go home, I'm sure exactly

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Speaker 1: born again. Okay. So the coach comes over and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, he'll play. I just automatically, you know, offer

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Speaker 1: him up, and he starts crying and he's like, I

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Speaker 1: don't I don't want to play. I'm scared, Like he

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Speaker 1: was nervous that the older kids were going to play

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Speaker 1: with him and he just didn't want to do it.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, you will get over and you

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Speaker 1: will go, and this is what you're gonna do because

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Speaker 1: you're gonna get a scholarship and I'm not paying for

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Speaker 1: your college education, so you better get in there. A

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Speaker 1: little seven year old and she's telling me this story

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Speaker 1: and then she goes, and then Josh stormed out right

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Speaker 1: and through the uniform at the garbage. Oh that story.

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Speaker 1: That was another story. Oh that was the same day

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Speaker 1: we went and played Wreck. So this is a travel

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Speaker 1: team for those of you out there who knows sports

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Speaker 1: travels very serious. And then Wreck, anyone with a pulse

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Speaker 1: can play, right, you just have to be in the

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Speaker 1: age group. So we signed him up for that. When

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Speaker 1: we get there and there's no rules, like you can

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Speaker 1: run with the ball, you can triple dribble. It was

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Speaker 1: like a whole new sport genre. It wasn't basketball. So

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Speaker 1: I'm like yelling at the ref like, hey, you're gonna

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Speaker 1: call it a double dribble guy, and he's like nope,

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Speaker 1: just keeps ignoring me. I'm like, hey, that that guy.

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Speaker 1: You can't do that. You can't you know, run ten

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Speaker 1: steps with the ball, like you know, like this is

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Speaker 1: not basketball. I don't know what this is, but it's

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Speaker 1: some bullshit. And in Sino, California and they were like, no,

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Speaker 1: the kids are just having fun. I'm like, they're not four,

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Speaker 1: there seven and we're on a mission here. So Josh

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Speaker 1: took the uniform and threw it in the trash can

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Speaker 1: and the coach was like, what are you doing? And

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Speaker 1: then I came out. I'm like, you shouldn't throw away

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Speaker 1: the wreck, you know, the wreck. They don't have any money,

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Speaker 1: so I was like get I fished it out and

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Speaker 1: gave it to the guy, but I'm like, we're done here.

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Speaker 1: And that's Jamie Greenberg. Everybody. She's a celebrity makeup artist.

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Speaker 1: That's how she introduces herself on her Instagram. You have

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Speaker 1: to follow her on Instagram Jamie Makeup at Jamie Makeup,

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Speaker 1: Jamie Makeup, and she has all these great products that

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Speaker 1: I use. Bl Lighter, which is a splosh that you

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Speaker 1: could use his eyeshadow, you could use it on your lips.

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Speaker 1: And then she has bloss and I think everything in

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Speaker 1: her product line she start with b L and she

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Speaker 1: is not on board with that, right, bless you for

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Speaker 1: saying that, But I don't know if that's such a

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Speaker 1: good idea. I don't know. I mean, I know because

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Speaker 1: everything was like like a hand job. You're right, you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean. You can't just stop and then

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Speaker 1: be like we're going to do something else. No, I

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Speaker 1: think you're right. I think let's talk about the third

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Speaker 1: product when it comes to fruition, and you can help

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Speaker 1: name it. But you can get those products at Jamie

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Speaker 1: mckup and they're all light natural, like really nice organic.

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Speaker 1: They're gluten free and gluten free and just really really quick.

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Speaker 1: If you buy the clear one, I'm selling five of

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Speaker 1: the Clear ones, which is the Bloss. It's a clear

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Speaker 1: bloss bomb gloss. The first five hundred I'm giving a

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Speaker 1: hundred percent of the proceeds to Plan Parenthood. Let me

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Speaker 1: be clear, be clear. We're starting to get other brands

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Speaker 1: to be in this campaign. I just talked to Plan

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Speaker 1: Parenthood this morning. Sister from my activist friend Chelsea Handler,

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Speaker 1: how to get involved and stick up for what you

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Speaker 1: believe in. And I'm sticking up for my vagina and

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Speaker 1: my daughter's vagina and my son's vagina after that game. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. Jamie's so like I said, she's not.

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Speaker 1: She's a latch key mother. She has been traveling with me.

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Speaker 1: You came to New York with us, you came to Nashville,

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Speaker 1: then you went to Italy. I went to Italy and Mexico,

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Speaker 1: Mexico with your family. That was a nice throw them

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Speaker 1: a bone, take them to Mexico for a week, and

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Speaker 1: then she went back on another trip on her own.

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Speaker 1: These are all under the sub diffusion doing people's makeup work.

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Speaker 1: But that's not what's happening, and I think that we

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Speaker 1: could all be honest about that. No, it's exactly I mean.

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Speaker 1: I went, I did the bride in Italy. Yeah, so

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Speaker 1: you were there for five days and you did one

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Speaker 1: day of work, seven days and two days of work rehearsal, dinner, okay,

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Speaker 1: and the wedding, and then with you, I don't even

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Speaker 1: want my makeup away. I'm basically renting Jamie for her personality.

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Speaker 1: She said to me on occasion that my makeup is subpar,

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Speaker 1: but my personalities attend. Anyone can make it in Hollywood.

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Speaker 1: You just have to have a good personality. Yeah, j

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Speaker 1: has the best personality. So Javie, let's talk a little

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Speaker 1: bit about your attitude in life a little bit, because

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Speaker 1: one of the things that I love about you so

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Speaker 1: much is how positive and what a party bringer you are.

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Speaker 1: And I know from personal experience that that could sometimes

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Speaker 1: be a burden because people are expecting a lot. Like

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Speaker 1: I I went through a lot, like a phase where

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Speaker 1: I was like very resentful of people expecting like, oh,

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Speaker 1: Chelsea's coming, She's gonna be hilarious, and I'm like, funk off,

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Speaker 1: you don't know what kind of what time a month

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Speaker 1: that this is for me and what I'm doing or

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Speaker 1: how you know what shape I'm in, And so I

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Speaker 1: became resentful of that at a point in my life.

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Speaker 1: Do you feel pressured to pick up the situation when

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Speaker 1: you walk into a room with clients or if you're

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Speaker 1: working or with your family, like, for sure, Well the

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Speaker 1: family gets the worst part of me, of course. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well I just said that You're never right. Everybody knows. Yeah, Josh,

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Speaker 1: if you're listening, I love you. Josh is actually calling

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Speaker 1: in today. One caller, it's your husband again. Yes, I

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Speaker 1: definitely think with maneuvering through my you know, business life.

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Speaker 1: I realized that when I brought positive vibes like it

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Speaker 1: changed the room, the dynamic. You could get anybody in

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Speaker 1: the room who's mad, angry and instead of taking it personally,

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Speaker 1: because in the beginning of the career, I would be like,

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Speaker 1: they don't like me, and I would go inside with

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Speaker 1: it and then I'm like, no, they're just they're having

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Speaker 1: their own ship and I'm gonna come in and I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna like make everyone in this room have a good time.

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Speaker 1: And that was like once I started doing that, like

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Speaker 1: I attracted the best clients you. I attracted just better

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Speaker 1: things in my life I did. I manifested a good time.

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Speaker 1: Who names some of your other clients CCO, Rashida Jones,

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Speaker 1: Molly Shannon, Julie Bowen, Elizabeth, Elizabeth Moss, I've done her,

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Speaker 1: Lizzie Kaplan Love, Lizzie Kaplan, Kristen Stress Store, like everybody,

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Speaker 1: it's crazy. Yeah you yeah, you have a great client list,

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Speaker 1: and that's not the skill that you just develop. Some

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Speaker 1: people don't have big personalities, so you already had that person.

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Speaker 1: I mean when we were doing a show back East,

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Speaker 1: I met like all of your friends from high school,

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Speaker 1: not all of them, but a lot of them from

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Speaker 1: growing up, like ten of them. And obviously like that

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Speaker 1: dynamic was at play while you were growing up, because

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Speaker 1: a lot of people I don't think could just all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden become the person in the room that

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Speaker 1: makes everybody happy, you know. And I'm sure you were

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Speaker 1: like that because we talked about sometimes when you were

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Speaker 1: growing up, like you always had your point of view.

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Speaker 1: I always had my point of view whether I was

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Speaker 1: playing soccer, whether I was dancing, whatever I did, I

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Speaker 1: had fun with it. And I feel like my mom

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Speaker 1: was like that. My dad was always working, so that's

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Speaker 1: where I get the travel part from in my in

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Speaker 1: my life. But no, sorry, dad, he won't listen. But

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Speaker 1: my mom was always like just so vibrant and everything

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Speaker 1: she did, and so I think it just seeped into

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Speaker 1: me and everything I do. I try to be positive,

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Speaker 1: and I feel like it gets you really fall are

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Speaker 1: I feel like I feel like it has. Yeah, there

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Speaker 1: are dividends. You know that it pays off in dividends

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Speaker 1: when you are positive and you are upbeat, like the

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Speaker 1: domino effect. It's like you're tipping over one domino that

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Speaker 1: tips over fifteen other ones. You could say that too.

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Speaker 1: It's like when you withhold I heard this analogy, I

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Speaker 1: think from a friend of mine recently. If you're upset

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Speaker 1: with somebody and you don't say anything about it, you're

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Speaker 1: letting a domino tip over in the wrong way, and

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Speaker 1: you hold it, holds it, holds it, and then all

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Speaker 1: the dominoes go down, and then no one said anything,

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Speaker 1: and then there's a whole fucking mestical And then conversely,

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Speaker 1: spreading joy and positivity is like tipping a domino in

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Speaker 1: that direction, you know, and then everybody kind of falls

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Speaker 1: in line, because when somebody's in a great mood, it's

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Speaker 1: hard to be a fucking bitch and it's hard to

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Speaker 1: be an asshole when there's positive vibes. It's absolutely and

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Speaker 1: I mean just think about it. Anywhere you go, there's

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Speaker 1: always somebody who comes in. Like even I was just

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Speaker 1: on the plane and one of the stores on the

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Speaker 1: plane was like moonwalking and having like the best time.

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Speaker 1: It was like six in the morning. Everyone just couldn't

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Speaker 1: help but laugh. He like spread smiles on everybody, even

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Speaker 1: though everybody was like shut up, but it's also like

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Speaker 1: thank you exactly. So yeah, I think it's so important

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Speaker 1: because I also have like a true Gemini in the

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Speaker 1: sense that like when I'm off, yeah, I just don't

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Speaker 1: want to participate, like I I my friends also know

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Speaker 1: like I won't go out or I won't show up

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Speaker 1: if I don't feel like I have enough energy to

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Speaker 1: be myself and be the best version of myself. Sometimes

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Speaker 1: I'll go and then I end up having fun, but

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Speaker 1: I'm just if I'm not in the right mindset. It's

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Speaker 1: it feels like you're going to get a cold or

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Speaker 1: something if you go out, Like I'm just not committed

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Speaker 1: to being myself and having fun, so I'll stay in

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Speaker 1: and watch like tons of TV, which she introduced me

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Speaker 1: to my very first episode of The Housewives of Dubai,

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Speaker 1: which I was also your very first episode. So Jamie

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Speaker 1: loves reality television and she can't get enough of it,

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Speaker 1: and she tells me I'm at it all the time,

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Speaker 1: and my assistant also loves a housewife series. But which

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Speaker 1: one is your favorite? Atlanta? I love Atlanta. I love

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Speaker 1: Beverly Hills, New York, New Jersey. I mean, I love

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Speaker 1: them all. I can't get enough. I really, and we're trying.

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Speaker 1: I think you should be on the Real Housewives of

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Speaker 1: Who's Who's My husbands? You have to be a housewife. No,

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Speaker 1: you don't have to. You don't know. I mean, I mean, no,

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Speaker 1: are they not married? Some of them aren't married. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's funny. It is fun I never thought of that,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, we watched. We had to lay over. What

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Speaker 1: city was at Chicago? I don't know what happened. Somehow

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Speaker 1: we got on a connecting flight. First mistake, okay, we

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Speaker 1: got weight laid, but we were all traveling together. There's

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Speaker 1: a nice, big group of us, so it was like

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Speaker 1: I didn't even care about that because we were all together.

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Speaker 1: I thought, okay, fine, well this will be an economic trip.

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Speaker 1: So we had to lay over I think four hours.

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Speaker 1: They said the plane was going to be and we

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Speaker 1: were like fun. But then they put us in a

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Speaker 1: private room in the lounge, you know, because of the

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Speaker 1: celebrity and Housewives of Dubai was premiering. Yeah, and we

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Speaker 1: got tons of Starbucks snacks. So so you guys and

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Speaker 1: showing me and we were I was like, oh, the

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Speaker 1: perfect opportunity for me. To get into this fucking show,

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Speaker 1: because honestly, the amount of people that air in my

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Speaker 1: life that watch The Housewives franchise, I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: missing Alan on something culturally because you can't relate. I

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Speaker 1: can't believe you don't watch it. Because if Recap with

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Speaker 1: You could be another podcast, like, it would be amazing,

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Speaker 1: I know, and I do feel like when people are

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Speaker 1: talking about it, I'm like, funk, who's Felicia you know?

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Speaker 1: Or whatever? And even when I did I've done some

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Speaker 1: of the Housewives podcast and have had no idea that

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Speaker 1: they were housewives. Like my publicist will be like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you should do this podcast. It's really popular to promote

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Speaker 1: something whatever, and I'll go on and then I'm like,

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Speaker 1: how do I know that woman? And They're like, well,

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Speaker 1: she's a real housewife like garcel I did Garcela do?

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Speaker 1: And then like she's on the Housewives. I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: she was on the reel as well. Yeah, and I

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Speaker 1: love her and she lives near me. To be fair,

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Speaker 1: she has had a lot of things she's for being

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Speaker 1: a house yeah. And is she married Garcela? No? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Was she married to someone someone else? Yeah? And the

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Speaker 1: men are never featured well, New Jersey. The men kind

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Speaker 1: of like rule the school, like Frank and Melissa's husband

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Speaker 1: Joe Gorga. And you know what I mean, do you

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Speaker 1: watch it? I? You know what, I have watched only

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Speaker 1: two seasons's watching the Kardashians. She's re watching the Kardashians.

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Speaker 1: I did watch the Utah One though. The first season

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Speaker 1: of The Utah One, I was into that. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: that one was good. The second season is great. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: my friend works on that show. That's a great franchise.

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Speaker 1: Anything moremon adjacent. But Dubai was a bomb. It was

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Speaker 1: not good. What's the word? So? I had subsequent episodes

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Speaker 1: of Dubaibe be any better. I haven't watched anymore that

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Speaker 1: that turned me off so bad. Like that room we

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Speaker 1: were sitting in, it might have carpeting, like a conference room.

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Speaker 1: How many times I had to go to the bathroom.

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Speaker 1: It was like a corporate conference room. But it was

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Speaker 1: great to sit there instead of like covid Ali in

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Speaker 1: the airport because we're with someone's faus. I was just

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Speaker 1: telling Jackie about Jamie. Sorry, you can call me whatever

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Speaker 1: you like, Jackie. I was just like Jamie about I

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Speaker 1: got this laser don two weeks ago and I can't

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Speaker 1: fill my chin because they whatever they did, I said,

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Speaker 1: do a double dose because I was starting to get

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Speaker 1: that little, a little bit of it. I was coming

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Speaker 1: down from my chin to my neck, and I said,

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Speaker 1: just hit me hard with that because they were putting

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Speaker 1: me under. So I was like, I don't care about

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Speaker 1: the pain level, just fucking get that thing to tighten up.

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Speaker 1: And I haven't been able to feel my ships. They

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Speaker 1: killed your nerves. I'm like, I went in after it

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Speaker 1: and I was like, I can't feel anything in this area,

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Speaker 1: and he's like, you won't for about three months, three years,

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Speaker 1: I know, three years. Like my boobs, there's parts of

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Speaker 1: it I don't feel. I had a reduction lift, just

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Speaker 1: for everyone out there, and I there's areas of my

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Speaker 1: titty I can't feel. Well. You had a reduction lift,

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Speaker 1: and interestingly enough, her boobs crew back. You guys, I

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Speaker 1: just like to eat and they came all. But this

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Speaker 1: is a phenomenon because you are not my first friend

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Speaker 1: that has had boob reduction and had the boobs grow back.

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Speaker 1: They see that would happened to me because I have

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Speaker 1: a weird thing where like my boobs are like goldfish,

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Speaker 1: Like if I lose weight, they stay the same size.

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Speaker 1: And if I gain weight, they get bigger. So it

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Speaker 1: just is like, how is that growing? Uh? They grow

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Speaker 1: to the size of their environment. Yeah, and they taste good.

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Speaker 1: My kids live on the but look my body. I'm

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Speaker 1: going to just show it in the camera. Can say

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Speaker 1: like I have Like I don't gain it in my

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Speaker 1: in my butt, in my legs, nothing. I gain it

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Speaker 1: a little in the hip and all in the tip,

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Speaker 1: all on the tip, all on the tip. I just

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Speaker 1: I guess it's like because I guess getting a boob

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Speaker 1: reduction is like a little bit like getting lightbo suction,

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Speaker 1: because when you get those procedures, they have to tell

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Speaker 1: you you cannot gain five pounds ever again. Otherwise it's

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Speaker 1: going to go straight back to where you where you

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Speaker 1: got it. Because I had lightbo done on my arms

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Speaker 1: when I was in my twenties, and then it like

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Speaker 1: on the back of my arms, you know, and then

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Speaker 1: it came around the front like the fat and all right, wait,

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Speaker 1: what the fund is it? And they're like, oh, it's

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Speaker 1: trans positioning. Yeah, it needs a new place to live.

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Speaker 1: To live, Well, you could have told me that in

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Speaker 1: the first place. They're like cockroaches that, yeah, you can't

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Speaker 1: get food production. You need specific instructions because it doesn't

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Speaker 1: make any sense to take them off. You always have

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Speaker 1: to go smaller than what you think to account for

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Speaker 1: when you gain weight and they come back. The only

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Speaker 1: positive is they're very buoyant, like because I got them lifted.

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Speaker 1: They're like huge, but they're like they're high and tight,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean. They're like a twenty five

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Speaker 1: year old. And my one of my friends is like,

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00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:32,400
Speaker 1: you should start an only fan. So that's the backup

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Speaker 1: plan if this makeup thing doesn't work out. Well, I mean,

404
00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:36,840
Speaker 1: you already have an only fan, so how would you

405
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Speaker 1: start a new one under a different name and alias?

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Speaker 1: Can I plug the only fans? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: what we're here for, Jamie. So we're gonna use your

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Speaker 1: sagaciousness and great instincts and have you help us give

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Speaker 1: advice to be I'm so down. I'm so down. Are

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Speaker 1: you going to come to my worka in September? Catherine

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Speaker 1: and you're coming? They're yeah, yeah, I have to check.

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Speaker 1: I think it's gonna be fine, but I'm coming. Let's

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Speaker 1: come the last week when we're going. But we're yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're having the last week, we're having a bunch of

415
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Speaker 1: girls funny, so please I'll no one parties like Chelsea.

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Speaker 1: I'm just I want to tell you we have the

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Speaker 1: I literally have the best time. Like it's just really fun.

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Speaker 1: You're fun person. Yeah, high five. I like to high five. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And you're honest too. She'll tell me what I'm being annoying,

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Speaker 1: and then I just leave and go watch TV. Well,

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Speaker 1: sometimes your marcos are too long, that's true, She's not

422
00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:35,199
Speaker 1: You're not saying anything, just like videotaping yourself like like

423
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,439
Speaker 1: well like only fans. If I wanted to see that,

424
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:39,240
Speaker 1: I would go on your only fans page. Then just

425
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 1: go to my own fans. Let's talk anymore. I'm like,

426
00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:43,760
Speaker 1: are you gonna say something or what I'm just like

427
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:46,240
Speaker 1: videotaping or something like I'm in the shower. It's really

428
00:20:46,359 --> 00:20:49,359
Speaker 1: humid out and um, I have a zip right here

429
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,919
Speaker 1: and my boobs are very big. Anyway, I hope you're

430
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,560
Speaker 1: having a good day. I love you. That's what my

431
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:59,760
Speaker 1: marcos are. Yours are always quick. Well, I'm going to

432
00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:03,200
Speaker 1: cut this often we're going to go to break Okay, okay, bye,

433
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:06,120
Speaker 1: that was it. Jamie actually we've done. Okay, just one

434
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:14,399
Speaker 1: one one segment of the show and we're back. We're back,

435
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:17,040
Speaker 1: and Jamie, I don't usually do this, but since I

436
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:19,120
Speaker 1: know you're a fan of the show, and I felt

437
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:21,560
Speaker 1: like this email was very appropriate. I have a feedback

438
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,920
Speaker 1: email that I'm going to read before we get into

439
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:28,880
Speaker 1: some questions. You mean you don't normally do this, well,

440
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:33,520
Speaker 1: not usually. Wall of the guest is here right. Also,

441
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,080
Speaker 1: I do want to say it's so nice to meet

442
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,320
Speaker 1: you because I've been listening to you for months now,

443
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:41,480
Speaker 1: and really I was talking about you with my husband,

444
00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:43,400
Speaker 1: who works on the show, and I was like, Jamie

445
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 1: is coming. He's like, do you know her. I'm like no.

446
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:52,680
Speaker 1: We talked for ten minutes. She's great. Thank you. Yeah, So,

447
00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:56,560
Speaker 1: Michelle says, Dear Chelsea, first huge fan. I had the

448
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,879
Speaker 1: privilege of seeing Chelsea in Seattle in February with my

449
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:04,320
Speaker 1: childhood best friend. It was our first post pandemic concert

450
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,560
Speaker 1: and it was exactly what a couple of fifty seven

451
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 1: year old Jewish Jersey girls needed. So that's thank you

452
00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:21,639
Speaker 1: number one. Second thank you as this I was there, Yeah, okay, anyway,

453
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:27,480
Speaker 1: I listened to whole relationship Red Flags with Julianna Margali's today,

454
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,080
Speaker 1: and it was exactly the advice I needed to convey

455
00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:32,119
Speaker 1: to my twenty eight year old son, who's in a

456
00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:34,919
Speaker 1: relationship with a woman much like the man described in

457
00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:38,800
Speaker 1: the podcast. I basically transcribed the advice and gave it

458
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:41,119
Speaker 1: to my son to help him see how unhealthy his

459
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:44,560
Speaker 1: relationship is, and it worked. So thank you, thank you,

460
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:46,960
Speaker 1: thank you. Nothing brings a parent to their knees more

461
00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,520
Speaker 1: than their child in pain, and you truly helped me

462
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:52,880
Speaker 1: to help my child through and out of something very

463
00:22:52,960 --> 00:22:56,880
Speaker 1: unhealthy and difficult. From one Jersey girl to another, thank

464
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 1: you for just being you and doing what you do best.

465
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,880
Speaker 1: Miss Oh my god, you have to send that to Julianna.

466
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:06,040
Speaker 1: Do you have her info? I'll text her. I'll text her,

467
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 1: but you have to send that to her. She's gonna

468
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 1: forge that. So, Julianna Margatus, did you. I've never gotten

469
00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:15,160
Speaker 1: more texts and responses in my life about somebody being

470
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:17,200
Speaker 1: so great on the podcast. She was. I knew nothing

471
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:19,359
Speaker 1: about her except she's an amazing actress and she is

472
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 1: so real and cool, and you know what, she's so genuine,

473
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,679
Speaker 1: she's without guile, like she's just very much present and

474
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:30,160
Speaker 1: like you want her to win. You root for her,

475
00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 1: and she's available for you, like you're talking to her.

476
00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 1: She's present and she's not thinking about anything else and

477
00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 1: just so filled with love. And I think everyone could

478
00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 1: pick up on that. But that's why she had such

479
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:44,959
Speaker 1: a big impact on her episode. She texted me also, Catherine,

480
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:46,679
Speaker 1: and said, please let me know if anyone drops out

481
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,520
Speaker 1: last minute. I'm happy to come back any time. I said,

482
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:52,399
Speaker 1: we love that offer. Yeah, I enjoyed that episode. She

483
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,600
Speaker 1: is amazing. She's so modest, she's so real, she's down

484
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 1: to earth, and she's just so she see there's something

485
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:01,879
Speaker 1: ethereal about her. Like looking at her in her face

486
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:04,080
Speaker 1: and her eyes and how open she is, you just

487
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:09,440
Speaker 1: feel safe with her and her like buttery voice, very

488
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:16,440
Speaker 1: different than Martha Stewart. It's a great episode. She tells

489
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,240
Speaker 1: it how it is that Martha poked up on my

490
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 1: phone that day. I was like, I looked at the phone.

491
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,919
Speaker 1: In the top news story was Martha Stewart wants friends

492
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:28,840
Speaker 1: to die so she can marry them. It was front

493
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:31,280
Speaker 1: and center on My People magazine and like little quotable

494
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:33,000
Speaker 1: quotes I was, it was like, I just want them

495
00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:36,240
Speaker 1: to die. Oh my god, she must have been like funk.

496
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:41,119
Speaker 1: Why vodka. She doesn't care, She's like says what she wants.

497
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,720
Speaker 1: I know, she's like making a rhubarb pie somewhere. She

498
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,080
Speaker 1: she seems to also be in the moment whatever with

499
00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:51,280
Speaker 1: whatever she's doing. She's in her own special moment. She's

500
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:55,240
Speaker 1: a gold fish. She doesn't remember anything from the past. Well.

501
00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:59,600
Speaker 1: Our next email comes from Maggie. Maggie is in Reno,

502
00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,879
Speaker 1: she says, Dear Chelsea, I live in a small town

503
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:10,880
Speaker 1: outside of Reno, Nevada, where it's sunny three hundred plus

504
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,480
Speaker 1: days of the year. However, my husband refuses to wear

505
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 1: a sunscreen. We do a lot of yard work together,

506
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:19,320
Speaker 1: and he's often out and about with the dogs. He

507
00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: usually tans more than burns, but I'm beginning to notice

508
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:25,199
Speaker 1: age spots on his face that weren't there before. He

509
00:25:25,320 --> 00:25:28,200
Speaker 1: notices them too, but shrugs it off. I know this

510
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 1: sounds vain, but I'm worried about the effect the sun

511
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 1: will have on his skin in the long run. After all,

512
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 1: I'm the one having to look at and kiss him

513
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:38,639
Speaker 1: every day. Is it unfair of me to insist he

514
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:41,240
Speaker 1: wears sunscreen? So he doesn't turn into a shriveled piece

515
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:44,439
Speaker 1: of leather. I've touted all of its health benefits, but

516
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:46,399
Speaker 1: I'm too afraid to flat out say that. I'm worried

517
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:48,199
Speaker 1: he's going to look busted by the time we're in

518
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 1: our seventies. I mean, if he asked me to get

519
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 1: a boob job, I'd be pretty offended. But this town

520
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 1: is already full of rednecks, and I don't want to

521
00:25:55,359 --> 00:25:58,040
Speaker 1: be married to one. I'm not sure what to do.

522
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:02,600
Speaker 1: Am I being too superficial Maggie? Well, first of all,

523
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:06,080
Speaker 1: she's gonna go in on this the sun damage aspect

524
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:08,280
Speaker 1: of it, because that's fucked up. First of all, you

525
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:11,600
Speaker 1: can couch it as protection, like refuses to wear sunblock

526
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:14,800
Speaker 1: is just stupid, Like there's skin cancer kills. Melanoma is

527
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 1: like one of the worst worst kind of cancers you

528
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,960
Speaker 1: can get and fatal like hello, So I mean, it's

529
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:25,679
Speaker 1: not even about vanity. It's about health and protection and no,

530
00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:28,240
Speaker 1: and vanity is there too. You have every right to

531
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 1: be like, hey, I don't want you to turn into

532
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,200
Speaker 1: a shriveled up raisin. Obviously you don't give a ship,

533
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:34,720
Speaker 1: which makes me question a lot of things that you

534
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,760
Speaker 1: don't think you should give a shit about the way

535
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,800
Speaker 1: that I feel about how you look, you know what

536
00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,639
Speaker 1: I mean. Obviously, relationships don't have to be based completely

537
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,280
Speaker 1: on that, but it is an element. But the most

538
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:48,400
Speaker 1: primary reason is to protect yourself from cancer. So if

539
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:50,640
Speaker 1: if you have a husband that doesn't want to wear

540
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:53,840
Speaker 1: sunscreen and doesn't think that it's going to affect him

541
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:56,359
Speaker 1: in any way, then that's a bigger issue. I know

542
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,159
Speaker 1: it is it hiding something else, Like that's just like

543
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 1: a no brainer. It's like take out the garbage, put

544
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 1: on the sunscreen. Maybe you need to show him how.

545
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:06,119
Speaker 1: Maybe you need to reward him like a little baby,

546
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:08,359
Speaker 1: because sometimes guys need to be like you know, I

547
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:11,119
Speaker 1: have to make my husband's doctor's appointment sometimes, like I

548
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,480
Speaker 1: have to call or he won't go. It's just part

549
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:16,679
Speaker 1: of their d n A. So maybe you know, attach

550
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 1: a reward to it, you know, like when kids are

551
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,440
Speaker 1: trying to learn to potty train. Like I would say,

552
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,120
Speaker 1: fun that you don't need a fucking reward to put

553
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:26,760
Speaker 1: on sunscreen, you fucking asshole. I think she shows has

554
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:28,199
Speaker 1: to put it on him. If you have to do

555
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:30,720
Speaker 1: it yourself, fine, who cares? Like a massage Yeah, give

556
00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:33,119
Speaker 1: him a little face head massage if he's if he's bald,

557
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:35,159
Speaker 1: that's fun to give him a little bald massage. And

558
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:36,560
Speaker 1: if he has a hair, just put it on him

559
00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 1: for him. If he and if he doesn't let you

560
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:41,399
Speaker 1: do that, then I don't even you know. There's a

561
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 1: deeper Yeah, escape Reno come out here called nine one

562
00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:55,480
Speaker 1: one and that police Academy will show that front door

563
00:27:55,880 --> 00:28:01,440
Speaker 1: with Carrie Kenny silver leading the chest and her best Yeah,

564
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 1: so non negotiable. Yeah, if he's not willing to do that,

565
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:05,639
Speaker 1: what else is he not willing to do? Call is

566
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:09,320
Speaker 1: back when you have a real problem. I mean, these days,

567
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:12,240
Speaker 1: like some people don't like the texture of SPF or whatever,

568
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 1: but these days there's all kinds of there's so many

569
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:19,359
Speaker 1: spfs and there's yes, there's oil, there's tinted they're great,

570
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:21,520
Speaker 1: and there's ones that you don't feel and they don't

571
00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:23,879
Speaker 1: change your skin. One I like the best is that Alta,

572
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:28,240
Speaker 1: the tinted moist Alta, dr Alta md no Alta you

573
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 1: you the beauty oh really also eats your ALTI. Okay, Yeah,

574
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:36,760
Speaker 1: there's a new one called Vacation that I really like

575
00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:39,800
Speaker 1: because it smells like a vacation and it sheers down.

576
00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:43,920
Speaker 1: I'll get you some. It's really delicious. Yeah, maybe, yeah,

577
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:45,719
Speaker 1: maybe you have to find him something that like smells

578
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:53,760
Speaker 1: good or beer. Doesn't the bunny ranch make an spfs.

579
00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 1: Oh well let's start there. Well, our next caller, this

580
00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:04,719
Speaker 1: is Nikki. Nikki says Dear Chelsea. I'm a thirty eight

581
00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 1: year old mother of four going through a relatively peaceful divorce.

582
00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 1: I was with my ex for nine years. I've recently

583
00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 1: started using bumble and dipping my toes into the dating pool.

584
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:17,000
Speaker 1: I'm looking just to get out and have fun, with

585
00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 1: no desire for a serious, long term relationship. I'm writing

586
00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 1: because I keep getting a lot of matches that are

587
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 1: men ten or more years younger than me. I wasn't

588
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:29,280
Speaker 1: anticipating this, and I feel predator ish considering I do

589
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 1: have an eighteen year old son. I know it's a

590
00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:34,240
Speaker 1: mental block for me, and I'm very attracted to several

591
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:37,200
Speaker 1: of these younger guys, but I'm terrified. I need to

592
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:39,719
Speaker 1: stop feeling like I'm an old hag and embrace this

593
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:42,840
Speaker 1: really flattering response. Any tips on how to do that?

594
00:29:43,960 --> 00:29:49,720
Speaker 1: Hi Nikki, Hi Nikki, Hi, Hi, Hi, Hi, My dear friend.

595
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:54,000
Speaker 1: Jamie's our guest today. She's hi, hi, Hi to Hi Jamie.

596
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:57,920
Speaker 1: Love your makeup girl. Thank you. How long have you

597
00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:01,240
Speaker 1: been single? First of all, a couple of mon okay.

598
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 1: And how long was your relationship that you're getting out of?

599
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 1: Nine years? Okay, well that's pretty quick to be dating.

600
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:11,920
Speaker 1: Are you ready to be dating? Um? Yeah, well I

601
00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:16,720
Speaker 1: left the relationship five years of that. Yeah, I left

602
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:21,640
Speaker 1: the relationship mentally a while ago. So yeah, okay, well

603
00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:23,960
Speaker 1: in that case, good for you. Good for you for

604
00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:27,120
Speaker 1: taking leave, taking permanent leave. I don't want that to

605
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:29,960
Speaker 1: be confused with a leave of absence. And how old

606
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:33,160
Speaker 1: are you? I'm thirty eight okay, and the gout and

607
00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:34,680
Speaker 1: you have an eighteen year old son, And so the

608
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 1: guys that are responding are how old? Twenty eight? I

609
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 1: actually to change the setting because they were as young

610
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:48,200
Speaker 1: as twenty because I couldn't oh younger than that at all. No,

611
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:53,160
Speaker 1: that's good, I actually think and eighteen is close. I mean,

612
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 1: I do think you do need to consider your son's age.

613
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:56,760
Speaker 1: I think that as a mother, like you know what

614
00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 1: I mean. You're setting him up for the rest of

615
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:00,040
Speaker 1: his life, so everything you do is going to have

616
00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 1: an impact on him, and that's something to always keep

617
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 1: in mind. I know you need to get some action,

618
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:07,640
Speaker 1: so I want that to happen as well, but in

619
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:10,400
Speaker 1: a way that you can have all situations working in

620
00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,160
Speaker 1: your favor. I would even say might be a little

621
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:15,000
Speaker 1: bit too close to eighteen because it's closer to his

622
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 1: age than it is to yours. So exactly, I maybe

623
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 1: like bump, but let's bump that age right. Thirties young too.

624
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 1: I mean you're thirty five, I'm thirty eight. Yeah, bump

625
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 1: it up to thirty. Let's do that. That's enough of

626
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:31,400
Speaker 1: an age difference. It's more of an age difference between

627
00:31:31,440 --> 00:31:33,840
Speaker 1: your son and him. And then do you like older

628
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 1: guys at all? Or no, you're only in the younger guys.

629
00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 1: I'm pretty open. I date older. My husband that we're

630
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:43,960
Speaker 1: getting a divorce is four years younger than me, So

631
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,200
Speaker 1: I've kind of been all over the place. What is

632
00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 1: you do? Have a cap on your age setting? Is okay?

633
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 1: Maybe go sixty girl, get freaky. I worked with senior citizens.

634
00:31:57,920 --> 00:32:00,640
Speaker 1: That's too too close to them. You just have sex

635
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:10,120
Speaker 1: with those people. I want to get fired. Sure, how's

636
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 1: it been? How's your dating experience been? Have you been

637
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 1: having a lot of fun. Yes, And actually, like, I

638
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 1: went on a date last night with someone like ten

639
00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 1: years older than me, but the best date I've been on.

640
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:24,880
Speaker 1: I went on a date one date with a year

641
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 1: old and it was the best date I've been on. Oh,

642
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 1: what was so great about it? He actually wanted to

643
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,320
Speaker 1: hear what I had to say. It sound me interesting.

644
00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 1: And we just walked on the beach at night. It

645
00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:40,200
Speaker 1: was just pleasant and nice. Yeah, it was just great.

646
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:42,360
Speaker 1: It's so funny you say that because my girlfriend in

647
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 1: Vancouver was on this thread with my girlfriends from Canada

648
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,120
Speaker 1: and she went out with a guy last night and

649
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 1: she goes, I don't understand what the fund is wrong

650
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:52,600
Speaker 1: with Ben. He has not asked me one fucking question

651
00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,040
Speaker 1: about myself. She's in the bathroom. She's like, I'd rather

652
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 1: be in the bathroom Marco poloing with you guys, then

653
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 1: fucking sitting here listen to this asshole talk about himself.

654
00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 1: She's like, he did not ask me one question. And

655
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:07,640
Speaker 1: this brings me to another point that my girlfriend said

656
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,480
Speaker 1: her brother works at a bar. He's like in his

657
00:33:09,560 --> 00:33:11,720
Speaker 1: thirties in New York City, and he said, oh, all

658
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:14,880
Speaker 1: girls under the age of thirty are bisexual now, all

659
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:17,840
Speaker 1: of them because men are so disgusting and terrible that

660
00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:21,080
Speaker 1: they've all turned inward. You know, they're all like, we're

661
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 1: open to women too, because and it's so interesting you

662
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:26,080
Speaker 1: say that a younger guy asked you about yourself, because

663
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:30,240
Speaker 1: younger men, this next generation, whatever that generation is called,

664
00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 1: what is that generation Z? They're the people that understand

665
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,800
Speaker 1: the situation about how like everything is shifting and moving,

666
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 1: and they understand you do need to ask women about themselves.

667
00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:44,840
Speaker 1: You do need to ask questions. Your moms are doing

668
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 1: a better job and raising them, you know, so listen,

669
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:52,080
Speaker 1: just use that as a template for like the fact

670
00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:54,360
Speaker 1: that you know what you're looking for, Like that day

671
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:56,560
Speaker 1: to have it in the first place was great because

672
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:59,240
Speaker 1: now you know, you want to have somebody that's going

673
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:01,360
Speaker 1: to be interested in you, and you're gonna be able

674
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 1: to find that above thirty, I agree. I hope you

675
00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:09,319
Speaker 1: will will. Yeah. You're fun, you look intell, cool glasses,

676
00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: great tasks. Thank you. Yeah, go have fun this live

677
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:16,440
Speaker 1: your best life. Do you You have the freedom to

678
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:19,040
Speaker 1: fucking do whatever you want with whomever you want. Now

679
00:34:19,560 --> 00:34:28,160
Speaker 1: over thirty, that's your one car ground. Try it alright, alright, alright, appreciate,

680
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:34,680
Speaker 1: I appreciate you. Let us know how it goes. That's funny.

681
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 1: I can see why younger guys are into her because

682
00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:39,880
Speaker 1: she's like vibrant, Like you said, she's got this cool tattoos.

683
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,919
Speaker 1: She's stylish, you know, I can see it. It's funny though,

684
00:34:42,920 --> 00:34:45,359
Speaker 1: when you think about the age immediately, I'm like, no,

685
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 1: no, no no, the age has to be closer to you

686
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:49,239
Speaker 1: than to your son, right, and mean, well, who the

687
00:34:49,239 --> 00:34:50,839
Speaker 1: funk am I to say that? But I just think

688
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 1: that's the right way. I think it's the right way too.

689
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:57,279
Speaker 1: I'm like, uncomfortable being in an elevator with somebody to you, like,

690
00:34:57,560 --> 00:34:59,040
Speaker 1: of the opposite sex. I'm like, I don't want to

691
00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:01,600
Speaker 1: make eye contact with m. I just don't want anything

692
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:03,560
Speaker 1: to do with it. I get very uncomfortable if I

693
00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 1: feel like a young boy is floating with me. Yes,

694
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 1: I don't like I've got into young at all. I've

695
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:11,400
Speaker 1: never been no me neither. I mean, I guess when

696
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 1: I'm older, I will be No. I think you'll still

697
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:18,439
Speaker 1: be going for the older. I'll probably be pound. Let's

698
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:22,560
Speaker 1: be honest, But it turned into a full time pussy pounder.

699
00:35:22,680 --> 00:35:30,320
Speaker 1: We all are moving on. Our next question. Is that

700
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:33,960
Speaker 1: a flask, Chelsea? No, it's a it's a chia. It's

701
00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:38,000
Speaker 1: like an antioxidant concentrated superfoods that I suck at out

702
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,800
Speaker 1: of this little What is this called a pouch? Ouch?

703
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:44,680
Speaker 1: Thank you? I knew a mother would know. I'm gonna

704
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 1: burp her. Now explain well. Our next call comes from

705
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:58,919
Speaker 1: Brooke Brook, says dear Chelsea. I'm thirty five years old,

706
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:01,280
Speaker 1: a freelance writer, and I live in your home state

707
00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:03,279
Speaker 1: of New Jersey. I promise this is not all just

708
00:36:03,480 --> 00:36:07,200
Speaker 1: email from journeys from New Jersey too. Well, my family

709
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 1: is Elizabeth. Oh that's right, you're not really. I love

710
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:14,239
Speaker 1: your podcast and listen to it every day while I

711
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:17,760
Speaker 1: walk my big fluffy dog. I could use your advice

712
00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:21,200
Speaker 1: after a traumatic experience. By the way, this is a

713
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:23,400
Speaker 1: little bit long, but it's because we have an update

714
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:26,120
Speaker 1: from her. I was twelve weeks pregnant with my first

715
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,719
Speaker 1: pregnancy when I had a miscarriage. My husband and I

716
00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:32,040
Speaker 1: were super excited to be parents and absolutely devastated when

717
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 1: we lost the baby. As I write this, it's been

718
00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: seven weeks since I had the miscarriage and no matter

719
00:36:37,040 --> 00:36:39,799
Speaker 1: how much positivity I try to channel, it wasn't meant

720
00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:42,120
Speaker 1: to be. My life is still abundant without a baby,

721
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:45,440
Speaker 1: et cetera. I cannot stop going down negative spirals of

722
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:47,439
Speaker 1: how there is a chance I'll never be a mother.

723
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:50,920
Speaker 1: It consumes me and is bringing my husband down. I've

724
00:36:50,960 --> 00:36:54,319
Speaker 1: tried gratitude, journaling every morning, charging crystals under the moon,

725
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 1: writing down affirmations, and no matter what I do, I

726
00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:59,960
Speaker 1: have this sinking fear that I'll never have a baby again.

727
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:02,319
Speaker 1: I know that you have no desire to be a mother,

728
00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:04,839
Speaker 1: but any advice on how to reframe the narrative into

729
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:07,080
Speaker 1: a positive so I can move on? And so then

730
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:10,799
Speaker 1: she sent an update while we were getting scheduled. A

731
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:13,480
Speaker 1: recent update. I just found out a week ago that

732
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 1: I'm pregnant again. I am, of course, so thrilled and

733
00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:19,360
Speaker 1: grateful I was able to conceive again, but I'm so

734
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:23,080
Speaker 1: terrified of having another miscarriage that it consumes my thoughts.

735
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:25,840
Speaker 1: That sinking feeling of never being a mother again that

736
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:29,000
Speaker 1: I mentioned in my first email, It's still very much there,

737
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:32,279
Speaker 1: It's just taken a different form. I cry almost every

738
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 1: day and have had anxiety dreams, fearing that the most

739
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: traumatic thing that's ever happened to me is going to

740
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:41,319
Speaker 1: happen again. Weirdly enough, that jealousy I have of other

741
00:37:41,360 --> 00:37:44,759
Speaker 1: new mothers and pregnant women is still here too. I'm

742
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:47,839
Speaker 1: jealous that they're excited and planning baby showers when I'm

743
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 1: crippled by anxiety and find myself almost waiting for the

744
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:53,120
Speaker 1: other shoe to drop. I really do not want this

745
00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:56,439
Speaker 1: to turn into a self fulfilling prophecy. My husband does

746
00:37:56,440 --> 00:37:58,799
Speaker 1: his best to reassure me, but the reality is he

747
00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 1: doesn't know that everything will be okay. Physically bleeding out

748
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:04,400
Speaker 1: your baby after seeing its heartbeat on screen is not

749
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:07,439
Speaker 1: something a man can fully comprehend. He lost his first

750
00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:10,680
Speaker 1: child too, but my anxiety of that happening again runs

751
00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:13,399
Speaker 1: far deeper than his. I know that it's not good

752
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:16,240
Speaker 1: for me, the baby, or my marriage. Please help Brook.

753
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:20,239
Speaker 1: Hi Brook, Hi Chelsea, how are you hi? This is

754
00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:22,960
Speaker 1: my good friend, Jamie Greenberg. She's our guest today. She's

755
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:26,920
Speaker 1: my makeup artist and buddy. Hi Jamie, Hi, how are you?

756
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:30,439
Speaker 1: So good to meet you? You too? You are a mother,

757
00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:33,640
Speaker 1: So why don't you speak to this first before I

758
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:36,440
Speaker 1: weigh in? Okay? So first, of all i've I've also

759
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:40,040
Speaker 1: had miscarriages. My first time I was pregnant, I had

760
00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:43,839
Speaker 1: a miscarriage, and I know exactly how you feel. And

761
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:47,440
Speaker 1: it is a death and there is grief. You seem

762
00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:50,240
Speaker 1: to be paralyzed by the grief. The thing about children.

763
00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:52,560
Speaker 1: When you have a child, I mean, your mind is

764
00:38:52,600 --> 00:38:54,160
Speaker 1: always going to go to a dark place, and you

765
00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:57,440
Speaker 1: have to start now while you're preparing to train your

766
00:38:57,440 --> 00:38:59,239
Speaker 1: brain not to be like, well, if they sleep out,

767
00:38:59,239 --> 00:39:01,319
Speaker 1: they're gonna die. If they drink that, they're gonna die.

768
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:02,879
Speaker 1: If they go on the field trip, they're gonna crash.

769
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:06,360
Speaker 1: Because you won't live. You're you're pretty much a prisoner

770
00:39:06,480 --> 00:39:09,400
Speaker 1: of fear. So I don't know if there's a therapist

771
00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:11,600
Speaker 1: that you could get into some therapy, or if there

772
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:15,080
Speaker 1: is like a light antidepressant you could take. It's amazing

773
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 1: what antidepressants could do. Some of them you can take

774
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 1: when you're pregnant. Some you can't think, So maybe you

775
00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:22,480
Speaker 1: could take I don't know. I'm not a doctor, but

776
00:39:22,760 --> 00:39:25,160
Speaker 1: I am, and you should talk to your doctor about

777
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:26,800
Speaker 1: what would be good, what would be best for you.

778
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:29,680
Speaker 1: Anti anxiety sounds like too, you know not, And I

779
00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:33,160
Speaker 1: mean because You're anxious. That's what this is, right, Yeah, yeah,

780
00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,919
Speaker 1: which can present as depression. But you're just nervous, which

781
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:37,759
Speaker 1: is so normal. I mean, do you know how I'm

782
00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:42,040
Speaker 1: common this is with women? Yeah, it's apparently it's one

783
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: in four pregnancies and in miscarriage, which is unbelievable, but

784
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 1: it's crazy. I've had three miscarriages, Brooke, Wow, so it

785
00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 1: can happen again. But it's okay and it's normal. And

786
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:55,840
Speaker 1: that's what my doctor said. Your body is doing its job.

787
00:39:56,239 --> 00:39:59,040
Speaker 1: That baby wasn't meant to be here because of whatever reason.

788
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 1: You want to healthy baby, and your body is doing

789
00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 1: its job. So I know it's really hard to switch

790
00:40:04,280 --> 00:40:06,360
Speaker 1: that and like just say thank you to yourself, but

791
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:09,000
Speaker 1: you have to start getting into that mind space. You're

792
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:12,080
Speaker 1: gonna be such a better wife, mother and human because

793
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:15,319
Speaker 1: you are also yourself. You're not just a wife and

794
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:18,800
Speaker 1: a mother, You're you and you have to treat yourself good,

795
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, And I think you should wake up

796
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,759
Speaker 1: every day and just write down fifteen times in a row,

797
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 1: thank you for this pregnancy, thank you for this pregnancy,

798
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:29,960
Speaker 1: thank you for this pregnancy, and you know, to just

799
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:32,879
Speaker 1: change the drumbeat that's going on in your head and

800
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 1: shift the narrative because you do have the power to

801
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:38,560
Speaker 1: do that, you really do. There's plenty of meditation apps

802
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:41,840
Speaker 1: that are gonna have be pregnancy specific, to calm down

803
00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:45,080
Speaker 1: your nerves, to calm your anxiety, to take it down,

804
00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:48,760
Speaker 1: and to be grateful instead of fearful. They talk about

805
00:40:48,760 --> 00:40:52,720
Speaker 1: how gratitude leads to abundance. That's true. Your attitude does matter,

806
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:55,359
Speaker 1: and it's not like your anxiety is going to kill

807
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,840
Speaker 1: your baby. But it's not helping anything, and it's certainly

808
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:02,120
Speaker 1: not helping you. So why not just figure out all

809
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:05,000
Speaker 1: the tools that you can, you know, access and look online.

810
00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:08,680
Speaker 1: Now everything is online, like these pregnancy support groups people

811
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 1: who have had miscarriage support groups. Just google that and

812
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,320
Speaker 1: you're gonna find a bunch of women that feel exactly

813
00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:16,239
Speaker 1: that the way that you do. That also are going

814
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 1: to have tools and coping mechanisms that you may not

815
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,440
Speaker 1: know about. It's so true. I mean the first miscarriage

816
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 1: I had, I had something called a mular pregnancy. Google it.

817
00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:26,239
Speaker 1: It's a whole thing. Anyway. I was had never heard

818
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:28,319
Speaker 1: of it before, and I remember I went on like

819
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:31,440
Speaker 1: Oprah's website. This was before christ I went on Oprah's

820
00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:33,800
Speaker 1: website and was like, you should have a show about

821
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:37,279
Speaker 1: Muller pregnancies. And I was like so depressed. I mean,

822
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:39,680
Speaker 1: it was a death. I know how you feel. And

823
00:41:39,880 --> 00:41:44,839
Speaker 1: I found this weird chat room in London in the UK,

824
00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:47,680
Speaker 1: and everybody there had gone through what I had gone through,

825
00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:50,359
Speaker 1: and we all like emailed each other and gave each

826
00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:52,240
Speaker 1: other tips and tricks, and it made me feel not alone.

827
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,840
Speaker 1: You're not alone. And no one talks about this because

828
00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:57,120
Speaker 1: it's you just don't want to go around talking about

829
00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:59,440
Speaker 1: death all the time. But it's so common. It's more

830
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:03,840
Speaker 1: common having a healthy pregnancy sometimes, you know, so figure

831
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 1: out what you need to do to get happy, because

832
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 1: it's just gonna it's gonna dictate how everything else goes. Yeah. Absolutely.

833
00:42:11,960 --> 00:42:14,160
Speaker 1: I think the big thing I've been struggling with is

834
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 1: I do try really hard to be positive and I

835
00:42:17,719 --> 00:42:20,640
Speaker 1: do my journaling every morning. I Chelsea, I like your

836
00:42:20,680 --> 00:42:23,719
Speaker 1: idea of maybe being repetitive about the one thing that's

837
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:25,960
Speaker 1: really on my mind. So I definitely would like to

838
00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:28,759
Speaker 1: try that. But it's almost like I say things like

839
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:31,880
Speaker 1: I will have a baby, everything will be fine, and

840
00:42:32,120 --> 00:42:34,799
Speaker 1: I want to do that I really want to believe it,

841
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:37,000
Speaker 1: and then there's like this little voice in my head

842
00:42:37,040 --> 00:42:39,880
Speaker 1: that's like do I believe that? What if that's not true?

843
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:41,960
Speaker 1: And then it's sort of like I go back into

844
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:45,200
Speaker 1: the spiral. So do you have any tips for that? Well,

845
00:42:45,239 --> 00:42:47,440
Speaker 1: we all have that voice that's like the devil on

846
00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 1: our shoulder. It's called our shadow. That's what like the

847
00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:53,960
Speaker 1: where our bad thoughts come from. And pushing that away

848
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:56,799
Speaker 1: you have to acknowledge that, you know, that's not your

849
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 1: that's not who you are, that is a part of you.

850
00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:01,640
Speaker 1: We all have a shadow. We all have someone telling

851
00:43:01,719 --> 00:43:03,520
Speaker 1: us we're not good enough, we're not smart enough. You're

852
00:43:03,520 --> 00:43:05,719
Speaker 1: not gonna get this. Everything's gonna fall to ship. You're

853
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 1: gonna lose this, You're gonna lose that, You're gonna run

854
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 1: out of money, and then you're gonna you know, each

855
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:12,359
Speaker 1: it and die. Everyone has that voice. You're not the

856
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:15,040
Speaker 1: only person that has it. The difference that you could

857
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,239
Speaker 1: make in your own life is by saying like, that's

858
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:20,120
Speaker 1: my voice, that's my shadow, that's it, I have it.

859
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 1: You can hear that once in a while, but you

860
00:43:22,160 --> 00:43:24,239
Speaker 1: can't let it run you. You know what I mean.

861
00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:27,000
Speaker 1: You're in charge of you, not that little voice in

862
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 1: your head, you know. And the minute you let that

863
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:32,360
Speaker 1: voice take over, and it's the only way that you think,

864
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:35,920
Speaker 1: you know, even that's salvageable, you can even still get

865
00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:38,520
Speaker 1: back from that, but then you've lost your voice, which

866
00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:40,879
Speaker 1: is the big voice. That's the little voice, and you're

867
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:43,200
Speaker 1: the big voice, and you have to just be in charge,

868
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:45,719
Speaker 1: you know. And even if it's a matter of repeating

869
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,080
Speaker 1: that exercise, you know, writing it down fifteen times, if

870
00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:49,799
Speaker 1: you feel like that does something for you, then every

871
00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 1: time you feel like that voice is overpowering you, you

872
00:43:52,560 --> 00:43:55,160
Speaker 1: can do that. You should start meditating, because that is

873
00:43:55,239 --> 00:43:57,799
Speaker 1: quieting of the mind. And what meditation does for me

874
00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:01,680
Speaker 1: is always quiet that voice. It always just like puts

875
00:44:01,680 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 1: me in touch with earth, the reason that I'm here,

876
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:07,160
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, like my body, and it's like,

877
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:10,520
Speaker 1: stop thinking about all the little little negative things. Just

878
00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:13,719
Speaker 1: connect with the fact that you're here on earth and

879
00:44:13,719 --> 00:44:16,440
Speaker 1: you're a living, breathing person and you have an impact

880
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:20,360
Speaker 1: on people. Mm hmmm. Yeah. I actually tried meditation for

881
00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 1: the first time yesterday and I really enjoyed it. And

882
00:44:24,080 --> 00:44:26,279
Speaker 1: some what you just said about feeling like you have

883
00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 1: an impact on people. I've been trying really hard to

884
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: actually find the positive of what happened, because that was

885
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:35,280
Speaker 1: kind of making me feel better, like maybe it happened

886
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:37,919
Speaker 1: for a reason. And even something like this of having

887
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:41,480
Speaker 1: the opportunity to share my story and connect with other

888
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:44,480
Speaker 1: women because I know there's so many women suffering in silence,

889
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:47,480
Speaker 1: it makes me feel like maybe I can help other

890
00:44:47,520 --> 00:44:51,040
Speaker 1: people feel better too. Great. There you go. That's the

891
00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:53,000
Speaker 1: first that's going to get you out of your own

892
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,120
Speaker 1: head right away. When you're talking to other people about

893
00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:58,600
Speaker 1: their stuff, you don't have the time for your negative thoughts.

894
00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:00,760
Speaker 1: And I love that you said you love meditating, because

895
00:45:00,840 --> 00:45:03,480
Speaker 1: sometimes for people it takes so long to love it.

896
00:45:03,719 --> 00:45:06,360
Speaker 1: So that use that as a science to start implementing

897
00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:09,319
Speaker 1: that into your daily life. Meditate every morning when you

898
00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:12,319
Speaker 1: wake up, do a gratitude meditation for where you are now.

899
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:14,360
Speaker 1: You are going to be able to help people. I

900
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:19,439
Speaker 1: believe that just you calling is helping somebody listening. That's

901
00:45:19,520 --> 00:45:21,520
Speaker 1: very true, and that makes me feel a lot better.

902
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:25,160
Speaker 1: Thank you. Yeah you got this, Brook. I would also

903
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:29,160
Speaker 1: recommend just specifically around your body. You're going through a

904
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:32,719
Speaker 1: trauma that is body related and it probably feels like

905
00:45:32,719 --> 00:45:36,120
Speaker 1: your body betrayed you. One of my mentors that always said,

906
00:45:36,120 --> 00:45:38,440
Speaker 1: if you're going through a trauma or a grief, triple

907
00:45:38,520 --> 00:45:41,160
Speaker 1: yourself care and for you, I think doing stuff that

908
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:45,319
Speaker 1: specifically as around your body. Taking long baths if that's

909
00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:49,120
Speaker 1: your thing, doing like a luxurious scrub, going to get

910
00:45:49,120 --> 00:45:52,560
Speaker 1: a massage, doing things to to treat your body in

911
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:56,480
Speaker 1: a way that makes you feel valued and good and

912
00:45:56,600 --> 00:46:00,439
Speaker 1: indulgent and positive about your body. Again, my be something

913
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:04,440
Speaker 1: that's really helpful. That's a really good to chime in. Last. Also,

914
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,279
Speaker 1: just because I've done this and I've I've done I've

915
00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:10,400
Speaker 1: had a lot of medical things within my family, you

916
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:13,800
Speaker 1: have to be your own advocate. You know, it's really crazy,

917
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:16,640
Speaker 1: but there's no gynecologist that's gonna say, hey, sorry about

918
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:18,600
Speaker 1: your miscarriage. Here is a list of things that it's

919
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:20,320
Speaker 1: going to make you feel better, and you should probably

920
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:22,319
Speaker 1: go do this, and you should do that. You're gonna

921
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:24,759
Speaker 1: have to seek it out and find what makes you

922
00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:29,480
Speaker 1: feel better, if that's acupuncture, meditation, getting on antidepressants, taking

923
00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:33,239
Speaker 1: a job. I run. I run my anxiety every day

924
00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:36,799
Speaker 1: and that works. So stay busy when you're feeling the

925
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 1: most paralyzed because it's going to take your mind and

926
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:43,200
Speaker 1: that ego voice out of controlling you, you know, find

927
00:46:43,239 --> 00:46:45,680
Speaker 1: out what Brook likes and take care of yourself because

928
00:46:45,719 --> 00:46:48,600
Speaker 1: no one is going to help you do that. Absolutely,

929
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:51,720
Speaker 1: I've been loving walking my dog every day and listening

930
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:56,680
Speaker 1: to your podcast'll see. I love that. I do want

931
00:46:56,680 --> 00:46:58,960
Speaker 1: to tell you. Actually I let Katherine know this, but

932
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:01,440
Speaker 1: the first time I ever listened to your podcast was

933
00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:04,120
Speaker 1: actually when I came back from the hospital after it

934
00:47:04,200 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 1: happened and I had to go walk my dog and

935
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 1: I usually listened to True crime, and I was like,

936
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:12,560
Speaker 1: I can't do that right now, Like I need something funny,

937
00:47:12,680 --> 00:47:14,560
Speaker 1: and I you know, I read all your books and

938
00:47:14,600 --> 00:47:15,960
Speaker 1: I loved them, and I was like, I wonder if

939
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:19,480
Speaker 1: Chelsea Handler has a podcast, and you did, and I've

940
00:47:19,520 --> 00:47:22,520
Speaker 1: listened to it every day since and I'm I love

941
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:26,040
Speaker 1: it obviously. I love how it's funny but positive and uplifting.

942
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:28,560
Speaker 1: So thank you so much for helping me get through

943
00:47:28,600 --> 00:47:30,920
Speaker 1: that really hard time. Oh my god, I'm looking now

944
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:36,960
Speaker 1: you're on the podcast. I know it's crazy. Yeah, I

945
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 1: love that. I love that you are going to help people.

946
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:43,560
Speaker 1: I can see it. You are, Yeah, and good luck

947
00:47:43,600 --> 00:47:46,839
Speaker 1: with everything. Everything's gonna be fine. Thank you, Everything's gonna

948
00:47:46,840 --> 00:47:50,359
Speaker 1: be okay. I needed to hear that. Thank you all right,

949
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:53,239
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Brooke, keep us posted. Okay, thank

950
00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:57,239
Speaker 1: you guys. Bye, Brook, bye bye. Nice to meet you.

951
00:47:58,040 --> 00:48:02,880
Speaker 1: Oh so sweetly love that. I was about to announce

952
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:04,880
Speaker 1: your miscarriages for you, and I was like, let me

953
00:48:04,960 --> 00:48:13,120
Speaker 1: let Jamie actually speak to that, because miscarriages. I've had three. Yeah, yeah,

954
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:16,759
Speaker 1: that's a lot devastating. Were they all as devastating as

955
00:48:16,840 --> 00:48:20,040
Speaker 1: the first one? I mean they're all devastating, but the

956
00:48:20,080 --> 00:48:22,680
Speaker 1: first one was like, it's because you don't have any kids,

957
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:24,520
Speaker 1: so you think something's wrong. I'm never gonna have kids.

958
00:48:24,560 --> 00:48:27,040
Speaker 1: I felt the same way she did. And now look

959
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,479
Speaker 1: I have three kids and I run away from them exactly. Book.

960
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,759
Speaker 1: You're going to be there soon. Yeah, you'll be in

961
00:48:32,880 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 1: Italy soon. Brook. Would you like to come to Spain?

962
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:41,719
Speaker 1: We have an opening. I feel like there is this

963
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:45,120
Speaker 1: to me, It feels dated. Advice of like don't tell

964
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:48,560
Speaker 1: anybody until the second trimester because what if something happens.

965
00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:51,080
Speaker 1: But what that then does is leave women in this

966
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:54,680
Speaker 1: position where if they do miscarry, their completely alone, their

967
00:48:54,719 --> 00:48:57,600
Speaker 1: families don't know what they're going through. What do you

968
00:48:57,680 --> 00:49:00,399
Speaker 1: What are your thoughts about that? I mean, I think

969
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 1: you're right. I think that's like an old way of thinking.

970
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:06,799
Speaker 1: It's like don't say the sea word or don't tell anyone. No,

971
00:49:07,040 --> 00:49:09,520
Speaker 1: you need your support system, you need your friends. I

972
00:49:09,640 --> 00:49:11,319
Speaker 1: was a blabber mouth. I would tell I'd be like,

973
00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:13,200
Speaker 1: my husband would be like, don't tell anyone. I'm like okay,

974
00:49:13,239 --> 00:49:15,560
Speaker 1: and I'd like tell ten of my friends. And then

975
00:49:15,680 --> 00:49:17,760
Speaker 1: when I had the miscarriage, I had those ten friends

976
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:20,560
Speaker 1: to support me rather than having to tell the story again.

977
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:23,520
Speaker 1: It's like, if people are in your life, they're in

978
00:49:23,560 --> 00:49:26,719
Speaker 1: your life for everything, not just like the good news. Yeah,

979
00:49:26,760 --> 00:49:28,600
Speaker 1: it's also yeah, it's also a great way to wead

980
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:30,600
Speaker 1: people out if they're not there for you. You know,

981
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:33,919
Speaker 1: I'm all about sharing everything. One of the best things

982
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:36,040
Speaker 1: in life to learn is to ask for help, because

983
00:49:36,160 --> 00:49:39,760
Speaker 1: people really want to give it, and there's no shortage

984
00:49:39,760 --> 00:49:41,840
Speaker 1: of that. Even though if you even though you know

985
00:49:41,920 --> 00:49:44,440
Speaker 1: you may think, oh, people are selfish, they're not interested,

986
00:49:44,480 --> 00:49:46,960
Speaker 1: they're too busy. People want to be there for you.

987
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:50,640
Speaker 1: I I want to be there for strangers, so I

988
00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:53,520
Speaker 1: know that this is true for so many people that

989
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:56,279
Speaker 1: want to help, and you know, asking for help is

990
00:49:56,320 --> 00:49:58,920
Speaker 1: just like such a lift off of your shoulders. It

991
00:49:58,920 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 1: feels so good to get love back when you need

992
00:50:01,040 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 1: it in those dark times. Agree well, Our last question

993
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 1: comes from a. A says Dear Chelsea. I'm hoping you

994
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:13,640
Speaker 1: can offer advice on how to get started with therapy,

995
00:50:13,960 --> 00:50:16,960
Speaker 1: not the finding the therapist part, but how to actually

996
00:50:16,960 --> 00:50:19,560
Speaker 1: talk with someone. I don't exactly know what I want

997
00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:22,000
Speaker 1: to work on or where to begin, but I definitely

998
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:24,359
Speaker 1: know that I do have things to work on and

999
00:50:24,360 --> 00:50:27,080
Speaker 1: to work through. I have a lot of unresolved childhood

1000
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:31,680
Speaker 1: trauma and complex parent relationships still lingering, and I mostly

1001
00:50:31,719 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 1: shove them down and try to ignore it. Up to

1002
00:50:34,520 --> 00:50:37,600
Speaker 1: this point. I've self medicated quote unquote with self help

1003
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:40,920
Speaker 1: books and podcasts, but my experiences are pretty unique, and

1004
00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:43,120
Speaker 1: I know one to one therapy would be beneficial to

1005
00:50:43,120 --> 00:50:45,759
Speaker 1: me at this point, But how do I start? For years,

1006
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:48,200
Speaker 1: I put off therapy because I felt like I couldn't

1007
00:50:48,200 --> 00:50:50,440
Speaker 1: afford it or access it. But I can no longer

1008
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:53,319
Speaker 1: use that excuse. I think what truly holds me back

1009
00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:56,560
Speaker 1: is just nervousness around getting started and facing it. Like

1010
00:50:56,600 --> 00:51:00,279
Speaker 1: where do you begin the initial consultation, the first meeting

1011
00:51:00,280 --> 00:51:02,520
Speaker 1: with your therapist. I find that part to be the

1012
00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:04,640
Speaker 1: most daunting. I just freeze at the thought of it.

1013
00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:08,480
Speaker 1: Please help a well, okay, she or he said that

1014
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:10,560
Speaker 1: they didn't want, they didn't need to know how to

1015
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:13,560
Speaker 1: find a therapist, right, they just how to start. Okay,

1016
00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:15,799
Speaker 1: I'll say this to you. Listen like this is a

1017
00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 1: bit a big topic of conversation in my life for

1018
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:23,640
Speaker 1: a long time. That you are postponing your true purpose

1019
00:51:23,880 --> 00:51:27,239
Speaker 1: and potential when you do not look inward, when you

1020
00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:30,640
Speaker 1: are put off facing what is has happened to you,

1021
00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:33,359
Speaker 1: and something has happened to every single person, you are

1022
00:51:33,400 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 1: postponing your true potential. You don't even know what is

1023
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:39,120
Speaker 1: on the other side. And yes it is it's a

1024
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:42,640
Speaker 1: daunting task, but you're courageous and your brave when you

1025
00:51:42,719 --> 00:51:46,439
Speaker 1: take that step. I won't ever date somebody who isn't

1026
00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:48,840
Speaker 1: in therapy or has been to therapy because it is

1027
00:51:48,840 --> 00:51:51,680
Speaker 1: such a valuable tool. You are going to learn skill

1028
00:51:51,719 --> 00:51:53,560
Speaker 1: sets that you didn't even think you needed to have.

1029
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:56,799
Speaker 1: And you're not only going to better yourself, you're gonna

1030
00:51:56,800 --> 00:51:59,400
Speaker 1: better your relationship with people, and you're gonna better your

1031
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,920
Speaker 1: understanding of other people, and your life is going to

1032
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,720
Speaker 1: be richer. And that takes a little bit of work,

1033
00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:06,880
Speaker 1: and you have to be willing to commit to going

1034
00:52:07,280 --> 00:52:10,520
Speaker 1: and doing that work. And being honest with somebody is

1035
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:14,040
Speaker 1: going to lighten your load. Getting things off your chest

1036
00:52:14,120 --> 00:52:18,120
Speaker 1: that have been stirring and harming you emotionally in ways

1037
00:52:18,160 --> 00:52:21,839
Speaker 1: that are seen and unseen. And talking about that with

1038
00:52:21,920 --> 00:52:27,080
Speaker 1: somebody a professional does wonders for your psychology. It helps

1039
00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:30,839
Speaker 1: you in ways that are immeasurable. And I can't say

1040
00:52:30,840 --> 00:52:34,440
Speaker 1: it enough that you know, get started now right away.

1041
00:52:34,520 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: Go find somebody, and if that's not the right person,

1042
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:39,680
Speaker 1: then go find another person. But do not be You

1043
00:52:39,719 --> 00:52:42,960
Speaker 1: have to be indefatigable in your pursuit of your therapy.

1044
00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:45,840
Speaker 1: You have to go for it, like go be brave.

1045
00:52:46,040 --> 00:52:47,760
Speaker 1: Just think about that. Do you want to be brave

1046
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:49,880
Speaker 1: or do you want to be a pussy? Yeah? And

1047
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:52,640
Speaker 1: do you want to like reap the rewards of how

1048
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:55,480
Speaker 1: good your life can get by you know, getting through

1049
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:57,960
Speaker 1: all the dark stuff, getting through the muck. You The

1050
00:52:58,000 --> 00:53:00,480
Speaker 1: only person in your way is you. And like you said,

1051
00:53:00,520 --> 00:53:02,200
Speaker 1: I do think that's good to point out, is that

1052
00:53:02,360 --> 00:53:04,279
Speaker 1: sometimes the therapist. You go too, might not be right

1053
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:06,880
Speaker 1: for you. It's like dating. So find one that you

1054
00:53:06,920 --> 00:53:10,200
Speaker 1: feel really completely yourself with that you can strip down

1055
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:13,880
Speaker 1: all this trauma, get it out. You'll flourish like a flower.

1056
00:53:13,960 --> 00:53:15,839
Speaker 1: You need you need to do it. And we only

1057
00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:18,320
Speaker 1: have one life here, so don't waste any more time.

1058
00:53:19,040 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 1: That's right. People are dying every day, every day, so

1059
00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:26,560
Speaker 1: good to therapy today. Well let's take a quick break

1060
00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:33,680
Speaker 1: and we'll be right back with Jamie Greenberg and Chelsea.

1061
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:37,799
Speaker 1: And we're back, Jamie Petter under we're back on. Thank you,

1062
00:53:38,120 --> 00:53:42,800
Speaker 1: Jamie Brad you can come back it now. Sorry, Well, Jamie,

1063
00:53:42,880 --> 00:53:44,960
Speaker 1: is there any advice you'd like to get from Chelsea?

1064
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:50,399
Speaker 1: I do have a juicy question. How do you make

1065
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:52,880
Speaker 1: your motster ball soup? No, that's not it. Okay, this

1066
00:53:52,960 --> 00:53:54,200
Speaker 1: is a good one I was thinking about. I was

1067
00:53:54,200 --> 00:53:56,200
Speaker 1: talking about with my girlfriends from high school and I

1068
00:53:56,239 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 1: was in New York. So I have a friend. Well

1069
00:54:00,080 --> 00:54:02,040
Speaker 1: it's it's a sister of one of my friends from

1070
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:07,560
Speaker 1: high school. She is in her early thirties, she's single,

1071
00:54:08,560 --> 00:54:12,799
Speaker 1: and she is dating an ex boyfriend of hers that

1072
00:54:12,840 --> 00:54:15,160
Speaker 1: she dated in her twenties and now a decade and

1073
00:54:15,200 --> 00:54:18,799
Speaker 1: a half have gone by. She's dating him again on

1074
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:24,279
Speaker 1: the side, but he is married with a child, and

1075
00:54:24,360 --> 00:54:29,839
Speaker 1: he's miserable in his marriage and the wife is miserable,

1076
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:32,960
Speaker 1: and she feels like it's not that big of a

1077
00:54:33,040 --> 00:54:36,600
Speaker 1: deal because they had a past and they're both miserable.

1078
00:54:36,680 --> 00:54:38,840
Speaker 1: But you know, it's still dicey, and she's like, I

1079
00:54:38,840 --> 00:54:40,440
Speaker 1: don't know what to do, and I was like, I

1080
00:54:40,440 --> 00:54:43,760
Speaker 1: don't know what to tell you. Let me ask Chelsea, Jared, Chelsea,

1081
00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:47,279
Speaker 1: what do you think? I mean? It's so it's like

1082
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:51,600
Speaker 1: if I was if I was more at the store,

1083
00:54:51,719 --> 00:54:53,959
Speaker 1: I would say, I hope that that woman passes away

1084
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:56,439
Speaker 1: soon so I can marry her. In a nice, delicate way,

1085
00:54:56,920 --> 00:55:00,239
Speaker 1: I think that it's just not good vibrations to be

1086
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:03,560
Speaker 1: participating in an affair. That's what you're doing. It doesn't

1087
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 1: matter how miserable either of those people are. He can

1088
00:55:07,160 --> 00:55:10,120
Speaker 1: leave his wife and end his marriage, and he should

1089
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:14,279
Speaker 1: if he's so unhappy. And also, I understand you have

1090
00:55:14,320 --> 00:55:16,080
Speaker 1: a history with him, so that gives you a little

1091
00:55:16,080 --> 00:55:18,880
Speaker 1: bit like I know psychologically what you're saying to yourself,

1092
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:20,640
Speaker 1: Like he was mine before he was hers, and we

1093
00:55:20,719 --> 00:55:24,279
Speaker 1: have a history. It's still not right morally, you can

1094
00:55:24,320 --> 00:55:27,120
Speaker 1: control yourself. He got a little taste of what could happen,

1095
00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:29,399
Speaker 1: right if he wants to leave his wife and start

1096
00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:31,960
Speaker 1: a life with you. So it's out there, he knows,

1097
00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:35,000
Speaker 1: and you should draw that delineation and line in the

1098
00:55:35,000 --> 00:55:37,400
Speaker 1: sand and say, like, listen, I'll be with you, but

1099
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:39,440
Speaker 1: I can't have an affair with you while you're married anymore.

1100
00:55:39,440 --> 00:55:41,640
Speaker 1: It's just not who I want to be, and especially

1101
00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:44,239
Speaker 1: if there's a future ahead for both of you, that's

1102
00:55:44,239 --> 00:55:48,319
Speaker 1: not who you want him to be. That is great advice. Yes,

1103
00:55:48,800 --> 00:55:51,560
Speaker 1: great advice. I just dropped the bike, did hear it? Yes?

1104
00:55:52,160 --> 00:55:54,880
Speaker 1: Put in this past. I was in the pouch, so

1105
00:55:54,920 --> 00:55:59,560
Speaker 1: you might not have heard of the liquid Mike. Actually,

1106
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:02,760
Speaker 1: before we go, Jamie, can I ask you a makeup

1107
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:09,800
Speaker 1: questions struggled with forever. I fancy myself pretty good with makeup,

1108
00:56:10,120 --> 00:56:15,680
Speaker 1: but whenever I put on mascara, I always get mascara

1109
00:56:15,719 --> 00:56:18,680
Speaker 1: on my lid. As I'm putting it on, it swipes,

1110
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:23,920
Speaker 1: It ruins my eyeshadow. My whole situation. What do I do?

1111
00:56:24,120 --> 00:56:26,319
Speaker 1: There's two things you can do, well, there's three things

1112
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:31,359
Speaker 1: you could do. The first is slow down, make your

1113
00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:35,480
Speaker 1: makeup time and meditation. Honey, slow down, relax. It's part

1114
00:56:35,480 --> 00:56:37,080
Speaker 1: of the self care. I know we don't have time

1115
00:56:37,080 --> 00:56:38,600
Speaker 1: for that. So if you're not going to do that,

1116
00:56:39,160 --> 00:56:41,360
Speaker 1: the second thing you could do is actually take something

1117
00:56:41,400 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 1: like a credit card or a super food pouch, put

1118
00:56:45,160 --> 00:56:48,319
Speaker 1: it behind on top of your eyes like this, you

1119
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:50,760
Speaker 1: put it, you lay it on top of your eyelid,

1120
00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:55,000
Speaker 1: and then you brush your mascara against the card or

1121
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:57,960
Speaker 1: the super food pouch. And can you do that with

1122
00:56:57,960 --> 00:56:59,879
Speaker 1: like a Q tip to just put like a que tip,

1123
00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:02,600
Speaker 1: put a cute tip, yes, and then I can just

1124
00:57:03,360 --> 00:57:04,680
Speaker 1: in case you don't have a credit card or a

1125
00:57:04,719 --> 00:57:09,319
Speaker 1: superfood couch in your bathroom or a business card. I

1126
00:57:09,320 --> 00:57:16,280
Speaker 1: always have credit cards in my bathrooms. Lastly, this is

1127
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:20,680
Speaker 1: a great trick. Do your masscarra and then wait till

1128
00:57:20,720 --> 00:57:23,920
Speaker 1: it completely dries. And if you take an empty SPOOLI

1129
00:57:24,040 --> 00:57:27,640
Speaker 1: which is usually on the end of like an eyebrow pencil,

1130
00:57:27,880 --> 00:57:31,040
Speaker 1: those little spoolies, you can actually chip away and the

1131
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:34,040
Speaker 1: mass scarrow will flake right off. Most people go in

1132
00:57:34,080 --> 00:57:35,440
Speaker 1: and then they try to take it off and they

1133
00:57:35,480 --> 00:57:37,680
Speaker 1: smear it and then you have a mess. If you

1134
00:57:37,720 --> 00:57:39,840
Speaker 1: actually wait for it to dry, you can just chip

1135
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:44,320
Speaker 1: it off. Wow. Wait what you know, what's funny. I've

1136
00:57:44,320 --> 00:57:47,120
Speaker 1: done it to Chelsea before because we have issues with

1137
00:57:47,160 --> 00:57:50,200
Speaker 1: my eyes. Jamie and I have issues. She likes to

1138
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,800
Speaker 1: I like to get her smoky. She's got her signature look.

1139
00:57:53,880 --> 00:57:56,360
Speaker 1: She likes to put eyeliner on the inside of my

1140
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:58,360
Speaker 1: eyes all the way down to here so that I

1141
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:01,600
Speaker 1: look cross side when I take picture. Yes, I was like, hey, Jamie,

1142
00:58:01,600 --> 00:58:02,880
Speaker 1: I should have a picture. I go, I don't want

1143
00:58:02,880 --> 00:58:05,840
Speaker 1: to ever look like this again, Okay. And now when

1144
00:58:05,840 --> 00:58:08,280
Speaker 1: I asked herre she's like, you said you didn't like yep, yep.

1145
00:58:08,520 --> 00:58:10,320
Speaker 1: She's got her signature look. And every once in a

1146
00:58:10,360 --> 00:58:12,600
Speaker 1: while we'll pop a little color in the eyeline or something.

1147
00:58:12,640 --> 00:58:15,040
Speaker 1: But besides that, she knows what she likes and she's

1148
00:58:15,080 --> 00:58:17,240
Speaker 1: sticking with it. But one time I did get a

1149
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:20,400
Speaker 1: little mascara on your eyelid. But if you wait, and

1150
00:58:20,400 --> 00:58:22,320
Speaker 1: then I like, was like sorry, and I just scraped

1151
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:24,360
Speaker 1: it away. It just it just flecks right off like

1152
00:58:24,480 --> 00:58:26,760
Speaker 1: dry paint. You know, dry paint. How you can just

1153
00:58:26,840 --> 00:58:30,760
Speaker 1: kind of like yeah, yeah, and do you put your

1154
00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:33,040
Speaker 1: mascara on from that? You don't do it from the

1155
00:58:33,080 --> 00:58:36,880
Speaker 1: top of the la because if you want to get

1156
00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:40,880
Speaker 1: more mascara on your eyelid, that would be a good approach. Also,

1157
00:58:40,920 --> 00:58:43,240
Speaker 1: straight in your mouth as wide as you can when

1158
00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:47,760
Speaker 1: you're putting on your mascara. Why do we do that?

1159
00:58:48,280 --> 00:58:52,480
Speaker 1: I don't know. This lighting is next level awesome. Look

1160
00:58:52,480 --> 00:58:57,720
Speaker 1: at your Claudia Shiffer. I'm sitting next and you did

1161
00:58:57,760 --> 00:59:00,600
Speaker 1: your makeup? Did somebody else do your make up? Okay,

1162
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:04,840
Speaker 1: I'll kill him. Cut a bit like in softball. Okay, Well, Jamie,

1163
00:59:04,880 --> 00:59:06,720
Speaker 1: I love you. Come back and visit us. Okay, I

1164
00:59:06,760 --> 00:59:08,959
Speaker 1: think you should be a regular. I love you, guys,

1165
00:59:09,280 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 1: Thanks for having me. Okay, Jamie makeup at Jamie Makeup.

1166
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:14,280
Speaker 1: You guys, go get some bloss blighter and make sure

1167
00:59:14,360 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 1: you support planned parenthood. So if you'd like advice from Chelsea,

1168
00:59:19,160 --> 00:59:22,760
Speaker 1: just send us an email at Dear Chelsea Project at

1169
00:59:22,800 --> 00:59:26,160
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. You're Chelsea is a production of I

1170
00:59:26,320 --> 00:59:30,919
Speaker 1: Heart Radio. Executive produced by Nick Stuff, produced by Catherine Law,

1171
00:59:31,040 --> 00:59:33,480
Speaker 1: and edited and engineered by Brad Dickert.