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Speaker 1: I believe that someone in this room, on this show

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Speaker 1: has actually surpassed me in their level of laziness. Now,

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Speaker 1: when I'm at home, you know I met no wheelchairs. Well, dude,

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Speaker 1: you only have one leg right now, so the wheelchair

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Speaker 1: is an excusable thing. Now in a year, when you're

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Speaker 1: fully healed and you're still wheeling yourself around you're in

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Speaker 1: a rascal or whatever, then I'm gonna say that you're lazy.

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Speaker 2: But right now, I'm not going to say.

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Speaker 1: You know, one week removed or two or three or

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Speaker 1: whatever it is from your moniscus repair. But I tend

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Speaker 1: to really lean into convenience services. You do, I really do.

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Speaker 1: I don't enjoy grocery shopping once as I don't enjoy it.

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Speaker 2: I just don't do it.

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Speaker 1: And then I complain about the produce I get when

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Speaker 1: I instacart it or whatever I do, and then it

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Speaker 1: shows up and I'm like, I could have just gone

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Speaker 1: to the place where they sell this stuff and picked

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Speaker 1: it out myself, But no, no, I don't. I really

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Speaker 1: enjoy a door dash once twice, maybe three times a day,

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Speaker 1: really depends on the day. At the weekend, breakfast, lunch,

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Speaker 1: and dinner, I gotta eat. However, one person in this

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Speaker 1: room admitted to ordering toilet paper when a CBS is

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Speaker 1: literally within said person's building.

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Speaker 2: Now that is another level.

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Speaker 1: Now I have at least a one block radius, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I will order things from it one block plus away,

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Speaker 1: And if it's inclement weather, I'll order and i'll tip. Well,

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Speaker 1: and we've already had this argument. If it's inclement weather,

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Speaker 1: are you a terrible person for ordering door dash because

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Speaker 1: someone has to go out in the ice, snow, rain, tornado, sleet, whatever. Now,

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Speaker 1: what we determined from actual doordask drivers who call the

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Speaker 1: program is that no, if I'm out working as a

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Speaker 1: doordask driver and there's a tsunami and I still choose

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Speaker 1: to work and you order, then you're helping me because

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Speaker 1: I chose to work. I chose to turn it on. You, Jason,

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Speaker 1: were once a doordask driver and you agreed with that.

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Speaker 3: Take yeah, because they offer additional incentives to stay working

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Speaker 3: and you get more money per delivery if it's busy.

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Speaker 1: So if I'm out and I choose to turn the

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Speaker 1: thing on, well, then I hope you order, because I'm

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Speaker 1: already I'm sitting here about to get swept away. By

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Speaker 1: the tsunami. So I mean I may as well go

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Speaker 1: get your shake shaft.

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Speaker 2: I got four wheel drive.

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Speaker 1: Let's go exactly, Kaitlin, how dare you shame on you?

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Speaker 1: You can the building?

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Speaker 4: I'm really ashamed of myself.

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Speaker 5: Does it change things if I do have to go

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Speaker 5: outside for a couple of seconds?

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Speaker 2: No?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'd like to know if anyone's just can think

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Speaker 1: of something eight five five three five what comes to

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Speaker 1: mind for you, the laziest thing that you could think of.

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Speaker 1: Maybe you'll make Kitlyn feel better, the laziest thing that

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Speaker 1: you've ever done. No, it wasn't Kiki in her one

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Speaker 1: ply someone tended.

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Speaker 6: No, I wasn't leave me out of this, Okay, No

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Speaker 6: it was. I did not order the toilet paper.

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Speaker 1: If I bought one bled toilet paper, I would have

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Speaker 1: to DoorDash or Amazon it because I wouldn't want anyone

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Speaker 1: to see me with it. What I wouldn't I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: want anybody out there to be like dude wipes with cardboard.

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Speaker 2: Now, knot say you try? Cardboard has more layers than

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Speaker 2: your toilet paper does. That's right, nothing's left behind. Nothing's

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Speaker 2: left behind right now?

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Speaker 6: And no anything can you got you got some back then.

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Speaker 1: If you're using one pa toilet paper, you may have

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Speaker 1: well just use your hand and then wash it Alasia clean.

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Speaker 1: It's the same thing anyway. So you had to walk

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Speaker 1: outside for maybe how long I know where you live,

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Speaker 1: so ten seconds?

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Speaker 4: Seconds? Yeah, not even second seconds? Yeah, if I walk fast. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I'm not proud of this, and I wasn't going to

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Speaker 5: tell you guys, because I'm not typically a lazy person.

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Speaker 5: But I just there was just one day. I just

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Speaker 5: I did not have it in me. I didn't have

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Speaker 5: it in me to go downstairs. I didn't have it

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Speaker 5: in me to to like exchange money for the toy.

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Speaker 4: I just didn't have it in me.

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Speaker 5: And I'm ashamed about it, and I'm really sorry. I

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Speaker 5: also recently ordered from a restaurant that is very close

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Speaker 5: to me and I got delivery and I'm very sorry.

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Speaker 5: But you know, sometimes mentally you just can't do one

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Speaker 5: more thing. But is so first, thank you, but I

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Speaker 5: feel ashamed.

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Speaker 1: It's your You're going to pay for the service, you're

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Speaker 1: gonna tip, you're gonna pay too much for the food,

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Speaker 1: then that's your prerogative, right like if no, But I

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Speaker 1: mean I say that in a positive way like, if

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Speaker 1: if you're willing to do all that, well, then if

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Speaker 1: it's one block or if it's ten miles, then I guess,

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Speaker 1: you know whatever, it's your money.

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Speaker 5: I mean, I should be getting off my butt, but

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Speaker 5: I just I don't know.

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Speaker 4: The lately life is.

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Speaker 5: I haven't even had time to too it if I

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Speaker 5: wanted to lately, So it just it just wasn't in

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Speaker 5: the cards.

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Speaker 2: I always fine, time to tote you.

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Speaker 4: Do when.

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Speaker 2: Just did?

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Speaker 4: Okay, I can taste it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, that was unnecessarily disgusting. Yeah, I mean one time

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Speaker 1: I ordered from a restaurant, not one time, multiple like regularly.

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Speaker 1: It's about two blocks away, and I didn't. I just

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Speaker 1: didn't want to because I had, Okay, I'm in my house,

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Speaker 1: I'm in my house clothes. You guys, I would have

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Speaker 1: to change out of my house clothes. I'd have to

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Speaker 1: put shoes on, a jacket, I'd have to go over

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Speaker 1: there order it, get it, walk it back. I was

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Speaker 1: in the middle of watching Drive to Survive. I was,

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Speaker 1: you know what, so I pay the premium. They brought

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Speaker 1: me the food. The problem is the guy, you know,

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Speaker 1: he shows up to the building. The building has to

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Speaker 1: let him in. The elevator to go up, and the

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Speaker 1: guy was like said to the guy, the elevator guy,

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Speaker 1: do you does he know how close this is?

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Speaker 2: And he was like talking smack about me. And I

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Speaker 2: already tipped good and the tip was good.

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Speaker 1: And so the door guy calls me, because yes, I

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Speaker 1: live in a high rise and yes there's a guy

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Speaker 1: that lets people in. I don't don't text me, oh,

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Speaker 1: you have a door guy. If there's a building, there's

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Speaker 1: a door guy.

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Speaker 2: Okay. I only hear about, Uh.

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Speaker 4: You're successful, and that's okay.

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Speaker 2: Well he's not my personal door guy.

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Speaker 5: Hundred people, I don't want you to defend or explain

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Speaker 5: your lifestyle.

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Speaker 4: I'm sick of it. I don't care.

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Speaker 1: A city with a building is a man that works

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Speaker 1: in the building, multiple men and women, and they lovely people.

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Speaker 1: And every time I bring it up, someone texts, Oh,

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Speaker 1: it must be nice. I guess it's nice for everybody.

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Speaker 5: I worked for twenty years in this industry and I

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Speaker 5: earned it well.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, So the guy calls me.

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Speaker 1: He was like, hey, it's on the way, by the way,

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Speaker 1: this dude's talking smack about you.

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, crazy. So then I'm like ready to go.

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Speaker 1: I opened the door and the guy standing there and

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Speaker 1: I was waiting for him to say something to me.

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Speaker 1: He didn't say anything to me. But I'm also not

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Speaker 1: what am I going to get? Yeah, we're standing in

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Speaker 1: my doorway, Like, now you know where I live. So

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to fight with you. I'm not gonna

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Speaker 1: fight with you. But it's very lazy. But I'm like,

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Speaker 1: don't white talking smack about me?

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Speaker 2: Man?

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Speaker 1: Like, yes, I know, I know I made this choice

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Speaker 1: and I paid too much for it. Is what it is, Malise.

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Speaker 1: How you doing? I'm good, I'm doing great. Tell me

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Speaker 1: the lazy thing that you do?

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Speaker 7: So to avoid making my bed? I have the covers,

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Speaker 7: but I sleep up another cover on top so I

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Speaker 7: don't have to make my bed in the morning.

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Speaker 1: So your bed is made, and then you have another

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Speaker 1: like a blanket that goes on top of the made

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Speaker 1: bed and that way, if you sleep like that, then

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Speaker 1: you don't have to make the But you have to

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Speaker 1: make the top part of the bed, don't you.

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Speaker 7: Sometimes now the time, But I could just put it,

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Speaker 7: you know, in a closet or something, and then I

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Speaker 7: have to worry about it.

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Speaker 2: That's hysterical. That's a different That is it? That Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that's pretty lazy.

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Speaker 1: I how about just sleep in your bed the way

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Speaker 1: it was intended and then just don't make it.

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Speaker 2: That's not so bad.

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Speaker 7: But see, like I wish up early, like I get

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Speaker 7: up at like six in the morning, I'm not doing

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Speaker 7: that at six in the morning. I'm getting ready in

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Speaker 7: the dark.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, in the morning.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, thank you, have a good day. By

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Speaker 1: Jose texted when I asked my kid to come turn

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Speaker 1: off my light like you're in bed, I guess you

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Speaker 1: don't want to have to get up and flip the switch.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I'm doing.

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Speaker 4: You give me a water? Can you get my purt?

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Speaker 1: Come on, get My daughter told me her boyfriend door

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Speaker 1: dashed five cans of pop when they had a vending

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Speaker 1: me in the lobby of his apartment.

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Speaker 4: Yeah that's that's a little much.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's a different level of laser.

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Speaker 3: They used to get like an order of like one

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Speaker 3: of like the little bag of chips, you know, like

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Speaker 3: the snack sized bag of chips, and like a candy bar,

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Speaker 3: and like a bottle.

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Speaker 2: Of mountain dew.

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Speaker 3: It's probably for some like seven year old I mean,

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Speaker 3: don't talk about my order right right? What seven older

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Speaker 3: than that you've never Here's the thing. So we gave

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Speaker 3: Jason as a show when he was recovering from his

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Speaker 3: knee surgery at home. We gave him a door Dash

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Speaker 3: gift card. You refuse to use it, No, I will

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Speaker 3: use it for me personally, Mike is the problem. Mike

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Speaker 3: doesn't like delivery of anything unless it's pizza.

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Speaker 4: Okay, so use it for yeah, no, I will.

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Speaker 2: I don't understand this. You didn't even pay for it.

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Speaker 2: I know we paid for it. I know, and thank

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Speaker 2: you guys.

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Speaker 1: So there's no there's no argument that it's wasted money

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Speaker 1: because like I get it. You know, my mom like

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Speaker 1: she refuses to use this. Yes, she'll get in a car,

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Speaker 1: she'll get dress, getting a car, drive for twenty minutes.

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Speaker 2: Way do I'm like, is your time not worth?

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Speaker 1: Is thirty minutes of your time on a Friday night

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Speaker 1: when you've worked all day? Is that not worth eight

210
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Speaker 1: dollars or you know whatever it winds up costing?

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Speaker 8: Like really, it's the older person mentality, I think right.

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Speaker 8: My mom's the same way too, like they will not

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Speaker 8: spend that dollar if they don't have to. So my

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Speaker 8: mom's appalled at Thordash like appalled. I can't believe this

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Speaker 8: exists when it's not.

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Speaker 3: Even about money, Like if I wasn't in the situation

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Speaker 3: that I'm currently in. I like driving and go picking

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Speaker 3: up food Like I don't know, I don't mind. How

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Speaker 3: much does that cost? You got to burn a couple

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Speaker 3: of gowns of gas? I mean that I sometimes wonder

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Speaker 3: you're definitely paying more to have it delivered. I'm not

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Speaker 3: going to argue that you're not, but I mean, how

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Speaker 3: much more?

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Speaker 2: Really?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, if you have factor in all the time and

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Speaker 3: gas and stuff. Yeah yeah, I mean it's easier in

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Speaker 3: the suburbs too, Like I can just walk outside, there's

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Speaker 3: my car, I hop it and go O versus.

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Speaker 2: That's true, you know.

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Speaker 5: I mean I usually don't do this, you know, I

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Speaker 5: walk everywhere. On my way home, I hit a couple

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Speaker 5: of places. But some days, you know, I just want

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Speaker 5: to splurt, Like the grocery delivery. I hate to say it,

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Speaker 5: but sometimes I just want my grocery it was delivered.

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Speaker 8: Well, yeah, because you can't really walk in the city

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Speaker 8: like with bags I do.

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Speaker 4: And that's why partially why my shoulders and back.

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Speaker 8: Of one of those little old lady wagon things.

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Speaker 2: I have a wagon.

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Speaker 1: Someone said they lost their fire stick remote so they

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Speaker 1: downloaded the app on their phone instead of getting up

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Speaker 1: to actually search.

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Speaker 2: Under the couch. Okay, that's just being resourceful.

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Speaker 6: Okay, so it's not mad at that that saved my relationship.

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Speaker 2: That's finding a better way. It didn't.

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Speaker 6: Oh yeah that remote one time you took it to

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Speaker 6: work on accident. Oh I was traumatized.

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Speaker 2: So how did you take a remote to work? I

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Speaker 2: have no idea for it.

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Speaker 6: And we need to talk about the size of remotes,

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Speaker 6: like why is this is this remote so small in

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Speaker 6: the first place. So once you lose it, it's like,

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Speaker 6: you know, you don't trust anybody in the house, the dog.

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Speaker 6: I'm like, get up, you're sitting on the remote. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 6: I downloaded it now and I just use it on

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Speaker 6: my phone.

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Speaker 1: Someone texted I used to do Uber eats on the side.

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Speaker 1: I had people that would order one cup of coffee

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Speaker 1: that was from Duncan. I'm like, what's the point in

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Speaker 1: paying twenty dollars or more for one coffee when it's

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Speaker 1: less than a mile from your place.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Occasionally I will do something where I do look at

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Speaker 1: the money and go okay, no, yeah, it does happen.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes you have your limits. I do.

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Speaker 1: Occasionally I'll be like, now, wait a minute, this is

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Speaker 1: gonna cost me eighty four dollars, you know for a sandwich.

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Speaker 2: Like no, I refuse. I refuse. I'm a dasher.

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Speaker 1: I refuse to order out because not because I'm lazy,

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Speaker 1: but because my order is always wrong.

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Speaker 2: I mean that does that does happen?

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Speaker 7: I guess.

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Speaker 1: But again, I don't get too mad about it like

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Speaker 1: I will if I get a completely wrong thing, then

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Speaker 1: I will like go to the app and say I

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Speaker 1: got the wrong thing or whatever. But if it's not

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Speaker 1: one hundred percent perfect, like I'm not taking back tips

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Speaker 1: and complaining because the truth is I didn't go get

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Speaker 1: it myself, like the bad produce. Like if I get

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Speaker 1: like produce, who am I to complain? I was too

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Speaker 1: lazy to go get it myself.

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Speaker 2: That's true.

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Speaker 1: Now you could make the argument you paid for it,

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Speaker 1: so it should be right. But yeah, okay, well calen,

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Speaker 1: still the laziest thing I've ever heard.

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Speaker 2: So wow, it's close.

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Speaker 5: You know, thank you for giving me a safe space

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Speaker 5: to sh becase I've been peeting myself up about it.

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Speaker 1: I mean, not undoing the bed and then making another

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Speaker 1: bed on top of the bed.

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Speaker 2: Innovative, innovative vlog.

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Speaker 1: Stay go six hundred bucks I believe, I said, with

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Speaker 1: show by Shelley and the next keyword that you need.

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Speaker 1: We're down in the last four for the trip to

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Speaker 1: see Harry Styles in Sydney, Australia.

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Speaker 2: Got all of that neck more pread show next