Speaker 1: No one's really judging you for that long because they're
Speaker 1: judging themselves more. No one's really criticizing you that much
Speaker 1: because they're criticizing themselves. More. Give them and yourself some
Speaker 1: grace and compassion. Leave that self consciousness that blocks you behind.
Speaker 1: The number one health and wellness podcast, Jay Setty Jay Shetty,
Speaker 1: Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I'm your host,
Speaker 1: Jay Shetty, and I can't believe it's the end of
Speaker 1: another year. Doesn't it feel like every year just gets
Speaker 1: faster and faster and faster, and time truly does travel
Speaker 1: in a way that we can't comprehend. And I think
Speaker 1: when it comes around to the new year, a lot
Speaker 1: of us are thinking about New Year's resolutions. We're thinking
Speaker 1: about new habits, and those are all great, But one
Speaker 1: of the things I've real over the years is that
Speaker 1: in order to make space for new habits, new ideas,
Speaker 1: new routines, new skills, new abilities, we have to leave
Speaker 1: things behind. We have to make space by letting go.
Speaker 1: We're not always going to be able to find new patterns,
Speaker 1: new routines, new habits if we still have old ideas,
Speaker 1: old mindsets, and old thought processes. One of my favorite
Speaker 1: stories told by the Buddha is about a person who
Speaker 1: is on a journey, and on their journey they come
Speaker 1: across their first obstacle. Just like you and me, they
Speaker 1: have a challenge in their way. Their challenge happens to
Speaker 1: be a fast flowing river, and this person knows that
Speaker 1: if they dip their toe in, they'll be swept away
Speaker 1: with the current, so they decide to craft a raft.
Speaker 1: They find bamboo, so they find some wood, they find
Speaker 1: some rope, they tie it together, they lay it down,
Speaker 1: They even make themselves an owe, and then they paddle
Speaker 1: with all their might and all their energy just to
Speaker 1: get to the other side. And finally, after lots of paddling,
Speaker 1: lots of pushing, they make it to the other side
Speaker 1: and they think to themselves, this raft saved my life.
Speaker 1: I always want this raft to be with me. I
Speaker 1: can't leave it behind. So they strap the raft to
Speaker 1: their back and continue to walk. Now, just like all
Speaker 1: of us have more than one challenge in our life,
Speaker 1: this person too comes to their next challenge, and their
Speaker 1: next challenge isn't a fast flowing river. It's a tall
Speaker 1: wooded forest with trees dotted at every other step. As
Speaker 1: they're trying to maneuver and move through the forest. The
Speaker 1: raft that strapped to their back is getting stuck. It's
Speaker 1: getting chipped. Trying to navigate, and they're trying to shift
Speaker 1: and move, but the raft keeps getting damaged and they
Speaker 1: keep falling back. The Buddha says that this person has
Speaker 1: an important choice to make. They either hold on to
Speaker 1: the raft and struggle to get through, or they put
Speaker 1: down the raft and walk through freely. The Buddhist says
Speaker 1: that we also have the same dilemma and choice in life.
Speaker 1: We can either hold on to old mindsets that helped
Speaker 1: us in the past, old ideas that served us in
Speaker 1: the past, old habits that may have made sense in
Speaker 1: the past, and we can struggle to move forward, or
Speaker 1: we can recognize that we can always rebuild that raft,
Speaker 1: put it down, and walk through freely, developing new skills,
Speaker 1: new mindsets, new ideas. The Buddha said that on this occasion,
Speaker 1: this person put down their raft and walk through freely.
Speaker 1: This is what today's episode is about. What am I
Speaker 1: letting go and leaving behind of in twenty twenty four,
Speaker 1: If I truly want twenty twenty five to be a
Speaker 1: new year, What old parts of me do I have
Speaker 1: to leave behind? If I truly want to build a
Speaker 1: new Year's resolution or habit, which old ones do I
Speaker 1: want to leave behind? And if I truly want to
Speaker 1: create a new life, which old mindsets am I willing
Speaker 1: to leave behind? And so I wanted to talk about
Speaker 1: this in the hope that you also reflect on. What's
Speaker 1: something that you realize no longer serves you. What's something
Speaker 1: that isn't helping you to move forward? Push forward? What
Speaker 1: is it that is actually holding you back? As the
Speaker 1: famous Zen saying goes, what's holding us back is what
Speaker 1: we're holding onto. What is your raft and how can
Speaker 1: you leave it behind? Number ten, as to what I'm
Speaker 1: leaving behind in twenty twenty four, is avoiding making mistakes.
Speaker 1: This is a world and a culture that favors people
Speaker 1: who take risks. Those risks can be personal, for example, deciding,
Speaker 1: as my wife and I did around eight years ago,
Speaker 1: to uppend our lives and move to a new country
Speaker 1: a new city. They can be professional, like deciding to
Speaker 1: launch a small business or write the screenplay you've always
Speaker 1: dreamed about writing, or experimenting with a new hobby, whether
Speaker 1: it's learning how to play the guitar, or learn Italian
Speaker 1: or become a birdwatcher. But often what gets in the
Speaker 1: way of our taking those risks is our fear of
Speaker 1: making mistakes, more specifically, our fear of future regret. We
Speaker 1: tell ourselves that if we make the wrong decision, it
Speaker 1: will be with us for the rest of our lives
Speaker 1: and will lose all respect for ourselves, and so will
Speaker 1: everyone else. I'm here to tell you that's just not true.
Speaker 1: If you look at any life, or any career, or
Speaker 1: anyone who has ever taken a positive risk that paid off,
Speaker 1: you will find that the pavement they walk to get
Speaker 1: to the place is literally littered with mistakes. Mistakes are
Speaker 1: a part of life. I don't know about you, but
Speaker 1: I've never been thirty seven years old before, so of
Speaker 1: course I'm going to make mistakes, just as I did
Speaker 1: when I was twenty seven and seventeen. Let's also remember
Speaker 1: that some of the greatest inventions in history, most of them,
Speaker 1: in fact, came as the direct result of mistakes and accidents. Velcrow,
Speaker 1: potato chips, pacemakers, the microwave oven. In twenty twenty five,
Speaker 1: More than ever, I want to let God the idea
Speaker 1: that mistakes are bad things and instead lean into them.
Speaker 1: As Alexander Fleming, the doctor who discovered penicillin by mistake,
Speaker 1: said about his discovery, one sometimes finds what one is
Speaker 1: not looking for. What I found is that anyone who
Speaker 1: moved fast, anyone who grew fast, made mistakes. And if
Speaker 1: we didn't make mistakes, it means we're moving too slow,
Speaker 1: and chances are we weren't happy with that pace of growth.
Speaker 1: You will make mistakes. You can't avoid mistakes. The biggest
Speaker 1: mistake is to try to never make a mistake. The
Speaker 1: biggest mistake is to be so scared of other people's
Speaker 1: judgment that you don't try something new. The biggest mistake
Speaker 1: is to let go of your dreams because of how
Speaker 1: you think other people will think about you. You will
Speaker 1: make mistakes. Start that podcast anyway, you will make mistakes.
Speaker 1: Write that book anyway. You will make mistakes. Start making
Speaker 1: content anyway, you will make mistakes. Move cities anyway, you
Speaker 1: will make mistake stakes. Do it anyway, because if you
Speaker 1: try to avoid making mistakes, nothing will change and nothing
Speaker 1: will happen. Number nine. I want to leave self consciousness
Speaker 1: behind and take forward consciousness and awareness. We live in
Speaker 1: a world of our own construction, a kingdom that lives
Speaker 1: inside our own heads. So to speak. We don't see
Speaker 1: the world as it is. Someone once said, we see
Speaker 1: it as we are. Realize that everyone around you is
Speaker 1: wearing a lens that determines and influences how they see
Speaker 1: the world. Yes, we can all agree on certain things,
Speaker 1: a concept known as consensual reality, but most of the
Speaker 1: time the lenses of others will in no way resemble yours.
Speaker 1: I say this because when we go to the supermarket,
Speaker 1: or go shopping for a new outfit, or go on
Speaker 1: a bike ride, our very human tendency is to believe
Speaker 1: we are the center or of the world and the
Speaker 1: center of attention, and that all eyes are on us,
Speaker 1: which of course makes sense since we are the center
Speaker 1: of our own attention. Or guess what, no one's watching
Speaker 1: or judging you with as much focus or in as
Speaker 1: much detail as you're observing yourself. Another example of consensual
Speaker 1: reality is that despite the glasses each of us is
Speaker 1: born wearing, other people are a lot like us in
Speaker 1: the sense they're focused mostly on themselves and wondering what
Speaker 1: you think of them, which is why I'll leave any
Speaker 1: traces of self consciousness behind me. In twenty twenty four.
Speaker 1: The best part no one's going to notice but me.
Speaker 1: See what I mean by this is you are fearful
Speaker 1: because you're scared of what people will think. You're not
Speaker 1: chasing your dreams because you're scared of what people will think.
Speaker 1: You're not pursuing your passion because you're scared of what
Speaker 1: people pople will think. You're not listening to your inner
Speaker 1: voice because you're concerned about everyone else's noise. And when
Speaker 1: you think about that, you realize that that person thought
Speaker 1: about you for two minutes, maybe once a year, maybe
Speaker 1: two minutes once a month, maybe two minutes once a week,
Speaker 1: maybe two minutes once a day, but most of their
Speaker 1: time were spent thinking about themselves. No one's really thinking
Speaker 1: about you because they're thinking about themselves more. No one's
Speaker 1: really judging you for that long because they're judging themselves more.
Speaker 1: No one's really criticizing you that much because they're criticizing
Speaker 1: themselves more. Give them and yourself some grace and compassion.
Speaker 1: Leave that self consciousness that blocks you behind because it's
Speaker 1: not serving anyone. The number eight goes to the belief
Speaker 1: that busy is good. Have you ever called up a
Speaker 1: friend or a colleague and ask them how they're doing
Speaker 1: or how their days going. Nine times out of ten
Speaker 1: they'll tell you that they're busy, that they have virtually
Speaker 1: no time to themselves, that they're juggling a bunch of
Speaker 1: different projects and have one hundred and twenty five unread
Speaker 1: emails in their inbox. If you're expecting to hear the
Speaker 1: word I'm fine, j thanks for asking what about you?
Speaker 1: Odds are you won't or maybe a quick text message instead,
Speaker 1: you will most likely hear the word busy. Busy in
Speaker 1: today's culture has become a badge of honor, a flag
Speaker 1: of sorts. It communicates to the world that we're popular,
Speaker 1: in demand, and more indirectly, probably extremely good at what
Speaker 1: we do for a living. Now, it can also make
Speaker 1: us feel like that's how we feel value. Hey, I'm busy,
Speaker 1: I've got lots on and that's how we define our
Speaker 1: own value. It says that we're plugged in, connected and
Speaker 1: on the fast strike in our careers and professions, or
Speaker 1: that we've just got an overwhelming amount of stuff to do,
Speaker 1: that we want some attention, we want to be seen,
Speaker 1: we want to be hurt, and there's just too much
Speaker 1: going on. When asked how you are, do you say busy?
Speaker 1: I fear that a lot of the time, without thinking
Speaker 1: about it, I do. And it's a response and a
Speaker 1: concept I'm eager to leave behind in twenty twenty four
Speaker 1: for many reasons. First, busy is in everything. In fact,
Speaker 1: busy is oftentimes misused. Busy can be a defense, a
Speaker 1: form of sublimination, a way of ignoring other things you
Speaker 1: should be thinking about, like your happiness, or your mood state,
Speaker 1: or your mental or physical health. Finally, what does it
Speaker 1: say about us as a culture that when someone asks
Speaker 1: us sincerely how we're doing a personal question, we reply
Speaker 1: in a professional capacity that we're busy, and what about you?
Speaker 1: Are you busy too? In twenty twenty five, if someone
Speaker 1: calls to ask how I'm doing, I plan on giving
Speaker 1: them a straight, honest answer and the spirit of how
Speaker 1: the question was asked, one that has nothing to do
Speaker 1: with what's on my desk or in my calendar. For yourself,
Speaker 1: you might be surprised by the words that come out
Speaker 1: of your mouth. I think one of the biggest things
Speaker 1: I've seen here is that it's about how we believe
Speaker 1: we're valuable. So I would encourage you to all think
Speaker 1: about that. Do you feel your valuable, do you feel
Speaker 1: your day is effective and your day is a success
Speaker 1: because you're busy, or do you actually end the day
Speaker 1: and realize that a busy day was not a beautiful
Speaker 1: day or busy day maybe didn't even lead to the
Speaker 1: achievements and the effectiveness you wanted to have. And so, really,
Speaker 1: really take a moment to think about it, really, really
Speaker 1: take a moment to figure out what do you want
Speaker 1: the answer to that question to be. It may be
Speaker 1: like I've got a lot on, but do you have
Speaker 1: a lot on? Because you think having a lot on
Speaker 1: is the right way to think about life. Now, we
Speaker 1: all have a lot to do, we all have a
Speaker 1: lot going on. But actually, are you just very organized?
Speaker 1: Are you prioritized? Are you being effective? Are you being productive?
Speaker 1: What's the language that you want to use that creates
Speaker 1: a healthy relationship with yourself and the idea of being busy? Now?
Speaker 1: Number seven, turning down the noise when you think about it,
Speaker 1: Noise surrounds us. We wake up in the morning to
Speaker 1: traffic sounds, maybe a leaf blower or a lone mower
Speaker 1: coming from the neighbor's house. We hear the drip of
Speaker 1: the coffee maker, a dog barking, the sounds of children. Later,
Speaker 1: meeting a friend for brunch, and a local food spot
Speaker 1: was surrounded by the clink of silverware, the clash of
Speaker 1: plates and bowls being set down or whisked away, the
Speaker 1: murmur and squall of other people talking. Music plays overhead constantly.
Speaker 1: It sometimes seems that wherever we go a clothing store,
Speaker 1: a gas station, a coffee shop, a restaurant, a gym,
Speaker 1: a song is playing, as if the riskiest thing in
Speaker 1: the world is for any of us to be alone
Speaker 1: with our own thoughts. But when I talk about noise,
Speaker 1: I'm not just talking about what comes in through our ears.
Speaker 1: I'm also talking about what is consumed by our eyes
Speaker 1: and our attention, and how the culture we inhabit seems
Speaker 1: intent on fragmenting the information we absorb, dividing it by two,
Speaker 1: then four, then ten, then one hundred. It's the opposite
Speaker 1: of depth, the opposite of learning and remembering. Instead, this
Speaker 1: kind of noise focuses on the surfaces of things. We
Speaker 1: scan headlines, we glance at our favorite websites, We scroll
Speaker 1: through photos and adversisements. We text instead of a call,
Speaker 1: and call instead of a meeting. What is noise if
Speaker 1: not a soundtrack to our lives that interferes with what
Speaker 1: we should really be doing, which is to say, being
Speaker 1: attentive to ourselves and those around us. One thing I
Speaker 1: want to leave behind in twenty twenty four is the
Speaker 1: role I've allowed noise to play in my life. Noise
Speaker 1: refers to everything that is distracting, alluring, and diverting, the
Speaker 1: blinking silver bells of technology, and the pressure it puts
Speaker 1: on me not to walk, but to skip, to skim,
Speaker 1: and to speed read, a process deliberately designed to leave
Speaker 1: me and all of us wanting more and always playing
Speaker 1: catch up. Eliminating noise is one of the things I
Speaker 1: plan on leaving behind in twenty twenty four. Number six.
Speaker 1: Before I say this, I want to just put in
Speaker 1: a disclaimer because I think people may see it as
Speaker 1: me being defeatist, but it's not that. It's me being
Speaker 1: a realist. I would call it the concept, not the
Speaker 1: idea or the fight for it, but the concept of
Speaker 1: how I see justice. So I still want to fight
Speaker 1: for justice, but the concept of it is different. Many
Speaker 1: of us want to believe that the world makes sense,
Speaker 1: that justice is a silent and animating presence in our lives.
Speaker 1: The idea that there may not be justice in the
Speaker 1: world makes most of us incredibly anxious. And when I
Speaker 1: say justice, I'm not talking about the judiciary or the
Speaker 1: local police and fire services. I mean the idea, no
Speaker 1: doubt borrowed from movies and TV shows, that people who
Speaker 1: work hard are certain to get ahead, That if you
Speaker 1: keep plugging away at something, you're guaranteed to see success.
Speaker 1: That if you do everything in your power to selve relationship,
Speaker 1: that relationship will probably succeed. The thing is, as we know,
Speaker 1: life doesn't always work out this way. Causes and effects
Speaker 1: are far more random than we're comfortable admitting. Sometimes we
Speaker 1: have to face the fact that people we don't respect
Speaker 1: for mysterious and inexplicable reasons manage to triumph while other
Speaker 1: good people worthy of respect for short, that justice sometimes
Speaker 1: operates as we believe it should, but just as often doesn't.
Speaker 1: When we illusion the world, the likelier we are to
Speaker 1: find it disillusioning when the equations we hold in our
Speaker 1: head don't work out as we'd expect to them to
Speaker 1: What I'm leaving behind in twenty twenty four is the
Speaker 1: idea of justice as an organizing principle of the universe.
Speaker 1: Sometimes things work out the way we expect and want
Speaker 1: them to, other times they don't. And the reasons why
Speaker 1: I'm mysterious, And perhaps that is a kind of justice. Actually,
Speaker 1: the universe does have justice, just not in the way
Speaker 1: we think about the math. So what does that mean?
Speaker 1: I would encourage us to walk away from waiting for
Speaker 1: justice and focusing on patterns. How can we study and
Speaker 1: create and build passions that will make that difference in
Speaker 1: our lives. That's what I'd consider. That's what I'd think about.
Speaker 1: Getting serious about light and dark is number five. Getting
Speaker 1: a good night's sleep matters. It's essential, in fact, to
Speaker 1: our physical and mental health. Helps us maintain a healthy
Speaker 1: immune system, keeps our stress levels in check, and improves
Speaker 1: our thinking and processing. If we don't get enough of
Speaker 1: it can lead to fatigue, anger, poor focus, lowered productivity.
Speaker 1: Like there's so many things connected to the quality of
Speaker 1: our sleep. It even contributes to health conditions like diabetes, obesity,
Speaker 1: and cardiovascular disease. But growing research and evidence shows that
Speaker 1: sleep is even more crucial than any of us imagined.
Speaker 1: Today science supports the idea that sleep is the absolute
Speaker 1: foundation of our mental and physical health that it is
Speaker 1: or should be, the primary determinant of the success of
Speaker 1: every one of our human endeavors. This means it's important
Speaker 1: to differentiate, really differentiate between lightness and darkness. First, let's
Speaker 1: talk about light. It is two separate components. People who
Speaker 1: try to get light in their eyes first in the morning,
Speaker 1: whether they're sitting outside or next to a strong sads
Speaker 1: lamp example, one with at least ten thousand lucks meaning
Speaker 1: not a bedside lamp or the light that comes from screens,
Speaker 1: have dramatically better fitter mental health than those who don't
Speaker 1: make getting morning light a priority. Twenty minutes is all
Speaker 1: anyone needs, with sunlight being the best source. Studies show
Speaker 1: that getting light first thing in the morning also has
Speaker 1: a positive effect on people who suffer from anxiety and depression.
Speaker 1: Access strong light early in the day and you will
Speaker 1: feel stronger and more invigorated, thereby setting the stage for
Speaker 1: a better night's sleep. A good night's sleep starts in
Speaker 1: the morning, cut to night time, where the presence of
Speaker 1: light plays havoc with a good night's sleep. Studies show
Speaker 1: that if we keep our bedroom environment as dark as possible,
Speaker 1: we will see the benefits in our own mental health.
Speaker 1: At night, dim all the lights, avoid screens for at
Speaker 1: least an hour before bedtime, and that includes reading on
Speaker 1: your kindle. Invest in a sleep mask. A big element
Speaker 1: of insomnia has to do with our nighttime exposure to light, light, dark.
Speaker 1: Simple as that, A simple change I plan to adapt
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty five. Number four is self criticism. We
Speaker 1: all have a judge and a jury in our own heads.
Speaker 1: You should have done this, you should have done that,
Speaker 1: you messed up, you're late. Sometimes that voice in our
Speaker 1: head is useful and potentially productive. It keeps us working hard, disciplined,
Speaker 1: and helps keep the trains running on time. But it
Speaker 1: can blur into something else too, a monologue of self denigration,
Speaker 1: the accusation that you never measured up to your own standards.
Speaker 1: Like most people, I can fall into this myself sometimes,
Speaker 1: and in twenty twenty four, my goal is to leave
Speaker 1: this kind of insight talk behind. I can't help but
Speaker 1: think back to something someone said to me once. Imagine
Speaker 1: yourself talking to a friend or someone you just met
Speaker 1: at a party the same way you address yourself inside
Speaker 1: your own head. Chances are your friend would burst into
Speaker 1: tears and walk away, and the person at the party
Speaker 1: would excuse himself for herself to go refresh their drink
Speaker 1: in the hopes they never have to talk to you again.
Speaker 1: This will sound advice in twenty twenty five, I'll retain
Speaker 1: the right quality of self criticism, the kind that makes
Speaker 1: me better, kinder, more positive, and more productive. But as
Speaker 1: with the other darker stuff, I remember to ask myself,
Speaker 1: are you treating yourself the same way you do a
Speaker 1: close friend? And that doesn't mean that you don't need
Speaker 1: tough love Sometimes it doesn't mean you don't need a
Speaker 1: push or a nudge. What it means is we don't
Speaker 1: have to denigrate ourself in a way that we wouldn't
Speaker 1: talk to anyone we love. Number three is waiting for
Speaker 1: the perfect time. It's so easy to put our goals aside,
Speaker 1: to wait for the perfect time, almost as though we're
Speaker 1: expecting a lightning bolt and a rack of thunder to
Speaker 1: rumble overhead, a signal that it's time to go ahead
Speaker 1: with our plans to travel and to pursue our passions
Speaker 1: and start that thing we've been putting off for longer
Speaker 1: than we remember. I'll do it as soon as we
Speaker 1: tell ourselves, as soon as the weather changes, as soon
Speaker 1: as the car gets fixed, as soon as I feel
Speaker 1: more settled. We all do this, and sometimes I find
Speaker 1: myself doing it as well, waiting for the perfect moment,
Speaker 1: the perfect time, the perfect sequence of months. Well, everyone
Speaker 1: who's listening right now, there's no such thing as the
Speaker 1: perfect time. There's no such thing as the perfect moment.
Speaker 1: There's no such thing as the perfect anything. Perfect is
Speaker 1: a concept taken from eternity. Perfect is a concept that
Speaker 1: we've subscribed to for far too long, and it's blocking
Speaker 1: us from starting. Don't let perfect stop you from starting.
Speaker 1: Don't let perfect stop you from creating. Don't let perfect
Speaker 1: stop you from trying. Don't let perfect stop you from practice.
Speaker 1: Don't let perfect stop you from progress. Don't let perfect
Speaker 1: stop you from understanding your potential. If you wait for
Speaker 1: the perfect time to do something, I can guarantee you'll
Speaker 1: be waiting for the rest of your life. In twenty
Speaker 1: twenty five, I am pledging that I will no longer
Speaker 1: put important things things I want to do off. Life
Speaker 1: is long, but it's also over before you know it.
Speaker 1: Start what you want to do now? Number two. As
Speaker 1: we get down to the final two. Number two, when
Speaker 1: we hear the words mediocre or mediocrity, our minds go
Speaker 1: back to school or college. We associate mediocre with SOSO grades,
Speaker 1: B minuses and C pluses, and with sloppiness or an
Speaker 1: absence of effort. Who would ever want to be mediocre?
Speaker 1: We would ever want to be a mediocre a partner,
Speaker 1: mediocre friends, a mediocre job, a mediocre car, or even
Speaker 1: a mediocre dog or cat. Fair enough, But I'm not
Speaker 1: using the word mediocre in the conventional sense. I'm using
Speaker 1: it in the sense of finding balance in our overstressed,
Speaker 1: over busy, often imbalance lives. I know I'm not alone
Speaker 1: and occasionally going to extremes, traveling too much, working too much,
Speaker 1: exercising too much. It's almost as though if I don't,
Speaker 1: a voice will shove up in my head, chastising me
Speaker 1: for my lack of discipline, for not putting enough effort,
Speaker 1: for letting another person down. I wonder sometimes who's that
Speaker 1: person that voice I'm at risk of letting down? Is
Speaker 1: it me? Or is it a phantom parent or teacher
Speaker 1: from my past? Is it real or is it a
Speaker 1: silhouette an archetype. What would happen if I listened to
Speaker 1: my own voice? In an effort to figure out what
Speaker 1: feels right to me or is the other voice my
Speaker 1: voice too? What if I fought back every time that voice,
Speaker 1: that internal twist in my own own personality, pushed me
Speaker 1: to tip over extremes, which brings me back to mediocrity.
Speaker 1: The word comes from the Latin medius, meaning middle, Oh,
Speaker 1: Chris refers to a steep or rugged mountain. Mediocre simply
Speaker 1: means in the middle of the mountain, not at the summit,
Speaker 1: not at the base camp, halfway there. Yes, there are
Speaker 1: some areas in my life where I will continually destrive
Speaker 1: to reach the top, and once I do that, to
Speaker 1: ascend the pinnacle of the next mountain and the next
Speaker 1: one after that. But there is value in remembering that
Speaker 1: once you separate the word mediocre from how most of
Speaker 1: us define it, it simply means that you have found balance.
Speaker 1: And balance in our lives, our relationships, our work, and
Speaker 1: our well being is what we all seek to attain,
Speaker 1: isn't it? And finally, number one, stop fighting fate. There's
Speaker 1: a wonderful paper written by a philosopher in the nineteenth century.
Speaker 1: He wrote words to the effect that as we get
Speaker 1: closer to the end of our lives and look back
Speaker 1: on the decades that have gone by and the people, places,
Speaker 1: and experiences that played a part in them. It's as
Speaker 1: though a cohesive narrative stretches out before us, an inevitable shape,
Speaker 1: even though some things felt accidental and random at the time.
Speaker 1: This thing led to that thing, and that thing led
Speaker 1: to this meeting, and this person and that person, and
Speaker 1: before I knew it. What this philosopher was trying to
Speaker 1: communicate was that while we are all the heroes and
Speaker 1: protagonists of our own lives, it can be hard to
Speaker 1: shake the feeling that a co creator also played a part,
Speaker 1: because the form and the format make such intuitive, remarkable
Speaker 1: sense when we look back on it. You can call
Speaker 1: this co creator God or a guardian angel or angel
Speaker 1: numbers or the universe. But the point is there seemed
Speaker 1: to be a direction that our lives were supposed to take,
Speaker 1: and our goal is to go with that direction, not
Speaker 1: against it. That doesn't mean we're passive, or that we
Speaker 1: lack agency or should ever play the victim. It's simply
Speaker 1: a reminder to trust our intuition, to remember that what
Speaker 1: happens in our life, good or bad, is happening, not
Speaker 1: to us before us for reasons we may not at
Speaker 1: the time understand, but we will later when we look
Speaker 1: back on our lives and see how much their shape
Speaker 1: resembles a book with the weld composed storyline, vivid characters,
Speaker 1: unexpected turns, and one can only hope a satisfying ending.
Speaker 1: This is a good lesson for all of us in
Speaker 1: twenty twenty five to take things day by day, do
Speaker 1: battle when it's called for, but remember that by and large,
Speaker 1: most things turn out all right in the end. Don't
Speaker 1: fight fate, and if you do, remember that battle may
Speaker 1: play a part in that same fate. Thank you so
Speaker 1: much for listening. I want to thank each and every
Speaker 1: one of you for dedicating hours and hours and hours
Speaker 1: of your time in twenty twenty four to listening to
Speaker 1: the podcast Take on Purpose with you as your friend,
Speaker 1: as your companion, as your support into twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1: I promise you we are just getting started. I am
Speaker 1: so excited for the future of this podcast. We're working
Speaker 1: on something all the time for you to make it
Speaker 1: more special, more deep, more profound. I can't wait to
Speaker 1: see you in twenty twenty five, and I hope a
Speaker 1: lot of you will join me on my podcast live Tour.
Speaker 1: I can't wait for that. And remember, I'm forever in
Speaker 1: your corner and I'm always rooting for you. Thank you.
Speaker 1: If you love this episode, you will also love my
Speaker 1: interview with Charles Douhig on how to hack your brain,
Speaker 1: change any habit effortlessly, and the secret to making better decisions. Look,
Speaker 1: am I hesitating on this because I'm scared of making
Speaker 1: the choice because I'm scared of doing the work, Or
Speaker 1: am I sitting with this because it just doesn't feel
Speaker 1: right yet