WEBVTT - 10 Things I Am Leaving Behind in 2024 to Make Space for 2025 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:03.120 No one's really judging you for that long because they're 0:00:03.200 --> 0:00:09.040 judging themselves more. No one's really criticizing you that much 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:13.400 because they're criticizing themselves. More. Give them and yourself some 0:00:13.520 --> 0:00:19.360 grace and compassion. Leave that self consciousness that blocks you behind. 0:00:19.760 --> 0:00:23.720 The number one health and wellness podcast, Jay Setty Jay Shetty, 0:00:28.640 --> 0:00:32.000 Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I'm your host, 0:00:32.200 --> 0:00:36.400 Jay Shetty, and I can't believe it's the end of 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:39.880 another year. Doesn't it feel like every year just gets 0:00:40.000 --> 0:00:46.559 faster and faster and faster, and time truly does travel 0:00:46.600 --> 0:00:49.919 in a way that we can't comprehend. And I think 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:52.199 when it comes around to the new year, a lot 0:00:52.280 --> 0:00:55.560 of us are thinking about New Year's resolutions. We're thinking 0:00:55.600 --> 0:00:59.160 about new habits, and those are all great, But one 0:00:59.200 --> 0:01:02.440 of the things I've real over the years is that 0:01:02.560 --> 0:01:07.040 in order to make space for new habits, new ideas, 0:01:07.160 --> 0:01:11.440 new routines, new skills, new abilities, we have to leave 0:01:11.800 --> 0:01:16.280 things behind. We have to make space by letting go. 0:01:17.200 --> 0:01:21.160 We're not always going to be able to find new patterns, 0:01:21.200 --> 0:01:25.640 new routines, new habits if we still have old ideas, 0:01:26.200 --> 0:01:30.759 old mindsets, and old thought processes. One of my favorite 0:01:30.760 --> 0:01:34.520 stories told by the Buddha is about a person who 0:01:34.560 --> 0:01:37.920 is on a journey, and on their journey they come 0:01:37.959 --> 0:01:42.520 across their first obstacle. Just like you and me, they 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:46.840 have a challenge in their way. Their challenge happens to 0:01:46.880 --> 0:01:51.440 be a fast flowing river, and this person knows that 0:01:51.480 --> 0:01:54.480 if they dip their toe in, they'll be swept away 0:01:54.520 --> 0:01:58.480 with the current, so they decide to craft a raft. 0:01:59.040 --> 0:02:02.160 They find bamboo, so they find some wood, they find 0:02:02.160 --> 0:02:05.120 some rope, they tie it together, they lay it down, 0:02:05.680 --> 0:02:09.240 They even make themselves an owe, and then they paddle 0:02:09.520 --> 0:02:12.440 with all their might and all their energy just to 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:16.120 get to the other side. And finally, after lots of paddling, 0:02:16.200 --> 0:02:19.320 lots of pushing, they make it to the other side 0:02:19.760 --> 0:02:24.040 and they think to themselves, this raft saved my life. 0:02:24.639 --> 0:02:27.800 I always want this raft to be with me. I 0:02:27.840 --> 0:02:31.080 can't leave it behind. So they strap the raft to 0:02:31.120 --> 0:02:35.359 their back and continue to walk. Now, just like all 0:02:35.360 --> 0:02:37.640 of us have more than one challenge in our life, 0:02:37.680 --> 0:02:42.119 this person too comes to their next challenge, and their 0:02:42.160 --> 0:02:46.280 next challenge isn't a fast flowing river. It's a tall 0:02:46.520 --> 0:02:51.760 wooded forest with trees dotted at every other step. As 0:02:51.800 --> 0:02:54.920 they're trying to maneuver and move through the forest. The 0:02:55.080 --> 0:02:58.359 raft that strapped to their back is getting stuck. It's 0:02:58.400 --> 0:03:02.720 getting chipped. Trying to navigate, and they're trying to shift 0:03:02.760 --> 0:03:05.680 and move, but the raft keeps getting damaged and they 0:03:05.800 --> 0:03:10.680 keep falling back. The Buddha says that this person has 0:03:10.720 --> 0:03:14.840 an important choice to make. They either hold on to 0:03:14.919 --> 0:03:19.240 the raft and struggle to get through, or they put 0:03:19.360 --> 0:03:23.240 down the raft and walk through freely. The Buddhist says 0:03:23.480 --> 0:03:28.600 that we also have the same dilemma and choice in life. 0:03:28.680 --> 0:03:32.120 We can either hold on to old mindsets that helped 0:03:32.160 --> 0:03:35.760 us in the past, old ideas that served us in 0:03:35.800 --> 0:03:39.400 the past, old habits that may have made sense in 0:03:39.440 --> 0:03:43.280 the past, and we can struggle to move forward, or 0:03:43.320 --> 0:03:46.520 we can recognize that we can always rebuild that raft, 0:03:47.400 --> 0:03:51.720 put it down, and walk through freely, developing new skills, 0:03:51.800 --> 0:03:55.880 new mindsets, new ideas. The Buddha said that on this occasion, 0:03:56.560 --> 0:03:59.840 this person put down their raft and walk through freely. 0:04:00.480 --> 0:04:03.120 This is what today's episode is about. What am I 0:04:03.200 --> 0:04:07.040 letting go and leaving behind of in twenty twenty four, 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:10.360 If I truly want twenty twenty five to be a 0:04:10.480 --> 0:04:13.920 new year, What old parts of me do I have 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:16.560 to leave behind? If I truly want to build a 0:04:16.720 --> 0:04:20.800 new Year's resolution or habit, which old ones do I 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:24.040 want to leave behind? And if I truly want to 0:04:24.080 --> 0:04:28.599 create a new life, which old mindsets am I willing 0:04:29.000 --> 0:04:31.839 to leave behind? And so I wanted to talk about 0:04:31.880 --> 0:04:36.080 this in the hope that you also reflect on. What's 0:04:36.080 --> 0:04:39.479 something that you realize no longer serves you. What's something 0:04:39.520 --> 0:04:43.320 that isn't helping you to move forward? Push forward? What 0:04:43.560 --> 0:04:47.200 is it that is actually holding you back? As the 0:04:47.240 --> 0:04:51.720 famous Zen saying goes, what's holding us back is what 0:04:51.800 --> 0:04:56.120 we're holding onto. What is your raft and how can 0:04:56.160 --> 0:05:00.280 you leave it behind? Number ten, as to what I'm 0:05:00.320 --> 0:05:07.039 leaving behind in twenty twenty four, is avoiding making mistakes. 0:05:08.160 --> 0:05:11.240 This is a world and a culture that favors people 0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:16.800 who take risks. Those risks can be personal, for example, deciding, 0:05:16.800 --> 0:05:19.320 as my wife and I did around eight years ago, 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:22.440 to uppend our lives and move to a new country 0:05:22.440 --> 0:05:25.880 a new city. They can be professional, like deciding to 0:05:25.920 --> 0:05:29.440 launch a small business or write the screenplay you've always 0:05:29.520 --> 0:05:33.360 dreamed about writing, or experimenting with a new hobby, whether 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:36.360 it's learning how to play the guitar, or learn Italian 0:05:36.640 --> 0:05:39.400 or become a birdwatcher. But often what gets in the 0:05:39.440 --> 0:05:42.560 way of our taking those risks is our fear of 0:05:42.600 --> 0:05:49.320 making mistakes, more specifically, our fear of future regret. We 0:05:49.360 --> 0:05:52.440 tell ourselves that if we make the wrong decision, it 0:05:52.480 --> 0:05:54.960 will be with us for the rest of our lives 0:05:55.520 --> 0:05:58.960 and will lose all respect for ourselves, and so will 0:05:58.960 --> 0:06:03.680 everyone else. I'm here to tell you that's just not true. 0:06:03.760 --> 0:06:06.080 If you look at any life, or any career, or 0:06:06.160 --> 0:06:09.719 anyone who has ever taken a positive risk that paid off, 0:06:10.520 --> 0:06:13.080 you will find that the pavement they walk to get 0:06:13.120 --> 0:06:18.440 to the place is literally littered with mistakes. Mistakes are 0:06:18.480 --> 0:06:21.839 a part of life. I don't know about you, but 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:25.120 I've never been thirty seven years old before, so of 0:06:25.160 --> 0:06:27.600 course I'm going to make mistakes, just as I did 0:06:27.680 --> 0:06:31.200 when I was twenty seven and seventeen. Let's also remember 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:34.520 that some of the greatest inventions in history, most of them, 0:06:34.520 --> 0:06:40.520 in fact, came as the direct result of mistakes and accidents. Velcrow, 0:06:40.960 --> 0:06:46.480 potato chips, pacemakers, the microwave oven. In twenty twenty five, 0:06:47.000 --> 0:06:49.760 More than ever, I want to let God the idea 0:06:50.240 --> 0:06:54.000 that mistakes are bad things and instead lean into them. 0:06:54.160 --> 0:06:57.839 As Alexander Fleming, the doctor who discovered penicillin by mistake, 0:06:58.200 --> 0:07:02.840 said about his discovery, one sometimes finds what one is 0:07:02.880 --> 0:07:05.960 not looking for. What I found is that anyone who 0:07:06.040 --> 0:07:10.800 moved fast, anyone who grew fast, made mistakes. And if 0:07:10.800 --> 0:07:13.240 we didn't make mistakes, it means we're moving too slow, 0:07:13.720 --> 0:07:16.440 and chances are we weren't happy with that pace of growth. 0:07:17.200 --> 0:07:22.640 You will make mistakes. You can't avoid mistakes. The biggest 0:07:22.720 --> 0:07:26.920 mistake is to try to never make a mistake. The 0:07:26.920 --> 0:07:30.040 biggest mistake is to be so scared of other people's 0:07:30.120 --> 0:07:34.320 judgment that you don't try something new. The biggest mistake 0:07:34.400 --> 0:07:37.120 is to let go of your dreams because of how 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:41.280 you think other people will think about you. You will 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:46.640 make mistakes. Start that podcast anyway, you will make mistakes. 0:07:47.400 --> 0:07:52.640 Write that book anyway. You will make mistakes. Start making 0:07:52.720 --> 0:07:59.080 content anyway, you will make mistakes. Move cities anyway, you 0:07:59.200 --> 0:08:03.560 will make mistake stakes. Do it anyway, because if you 0:08:03.680 --> 0:08:08.440 try to avoid making mistakes, nothing will change and nothing 0:08:08.480 --> 0:08:14.320 will happen. Number nine. I want to leave self consciousness 0:08:14.840 --> 0:08:20.480 behind and take forward consciousness and awareness. We live in 0:08:20.480 --> 0:08:23.600 a world of our own construction, a kingdom that lives 0:08:23.600 --> 0:08:27.200 inside our own heads. So to speak. We don't see 0:08:27.200 --> 0:08:30.280 the world as it is. Someone once said, we see 0:08:30.360 --> 0:08:34.240 it as we are. Realize that everyone around you is 0:08:34.280 --> 0:08:38.439 wearing a lens that determines and influences how they see 0:08:38.480 --> 0:08:41.800 the world. Yes, we can all agree on certain things, 0:08:41.880 --> 0:08:45.680 a concept known as consensual reality, but most of the 0:08:45.760 --> 0:08:49.720 time the lenses of others will in no way resemble yours. 0:08:50.520 --> 0:08:52.960 I say this because when we go to the supermarket, 0:08:53.280 --> 0:08:55.600 or go shopping for a new outfit, or go on 0:08:55.600 --> 0:08:59.040 a bike ride, our very human tendency is to believe 0:08:59.120 --> 0:09:01.480 we are the center or of the world and the 0:09:01.520 --> 0:09:04.560 center of attention, and that all eyes are on us, 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:08.040 which of course makes sense since we are the center 0:09:08.040 --> 0:09:11.679 of our own attention. Or guess what, no one's watching 0:09:11.880 --> 0:09:14.920 or judging you with as much focus or in as 0:09:15.000 --> 0:09:19.559 much detail as you're observing yourself. Another example of consensual 0:09:19.600 --> 0:09:22.680 reality is that despite the glasses each of us is 0:09:22.679 --> 0:09:26.120 born wearing, other people are a lot like us in 0:09:26.160 --> 0:09:30.280 the sense they're focused mostly on themselves and wondering what 0:09:30.360 --> 0:09:33.280 you think of them, which is why I'll leave any 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:36.840 traces of self consciousness behind me. In twenty twenty four. 0:09:37.840 --> 0:09:41.000 The best part no one's going to notice but me. 0:09:41.720 --> 0:09:46.120 See what I mean by this is you are fearful 0:09:46.679 --> 0:09:51.200 because you're scared of what people will think. You're not 0:09:51.400 --> 0:09:55.440 chasing your dreams because you're scared of what people will think. 0:09:56.000 --> 0:09:59.679 You're not pursuing your passion because you're scared of what 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:02.959 people pople will think. You're not listening to your inner 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:08.320 voice because you're concerned about everyone else's noise. And when 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:11.319 you think about that, you realize that that person thought 0:10:11.320 --> 0:10:15.800 about you for two minutes, maybe once a year, maybe 0:10:15.840 --> 0:10:18.680 two minutes once a month, maybe two minutes once a week, 0:10:18.800 --> 0:10:21.360 maybe two minutes once a day, but most of their 0:10:21.360 --> 0:10:25.320 time were spent thinking about themselves. No one's really thinking 0:10:25.360 --> 0:10:30.040 about you because they're thinking about themselves more. No one's 0:10:30.120 --> 0:10:34.319 really judging you for that long because they're judging themselves more. 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:40.400 No one's really criticizing you that much because they're criticizing 0:10:40.440 --> 0:10:44.640 themselves more. Give them and yourself some grace and compassion. 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:50.400 Leave that self consciousness that blocks you behind because it's 0:10:50.400 --> 0:10:55.280 not serving anyone. The number eight goes to the belief 0:10:55.600 --> 0:10:59.080 that busy is good. Have you ever called up a 0:10:59.080 --> 0:11:01.400 friend or a colleague and ask them how they're doing 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:04.200 or how their days going. Nine times out of ten 0:11:04.480 --> 0:11:08.000 they'll tell you that they're busy, that they have virtually 0:11:08.080 --> 0:11:10.800 no time to themselves, that they're juggling a bunch of 0:11:10.880 --> 0:11:13.840 different projects and have one hundred and twenty five unread 0:11:13.920 --> 0:11:16.880 emails in their inbox. If you're expecting to hear the 0:11:16.920 --> 0:11:19.880 word I'm fine, j thanks for asking what about you? 0:11:20.640 --> 0:11:24.000 Odds are you won't or maybe a quick text message instead, 0:11:24.080 --> 0:11:28.240 you will most likely hear the word busy. Busy in 0:11:28.280 --> 0:11:31.720 today's culture has become a badge of honor, a flag 0:11:32.000 --> 0:11:35.200 of sorts. It communicates to the world that we're popular, 0:11:35.400 --> 0:11:39.320 in demand, and more indirectly, probably extremely good at what 0:11:39.360 --> 0:11:41.600 we do for a living. Now, it can also make 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:44.240 us feel like that's how we feel value. Hey, I'm busy, 0:11:44.440 --> 0:11:47.320 I've got lots on and that's how we define our 0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:50.720 own value. It says that we're plugged in, connected and 0:11:50.720 --> 0:11:53.719 on the fast strike in our careers and professions, or 0:11:53.720 --> 0:11:56.280 that we've just got an overwhelming amount of stuff to do, 0:11:56.720 --> 0:11:59.200 that we want some attention, we want to be seen, 0:11:59.240 --> 0:12:01.240 we want to be hurt, and there's just too much 0:12:01.280 --> 0:12:04.920 going on. When asked how you are, do you say busy? 0:12:05.720 --> 0:12:07.959 I fear that a lot of the time, without thinking 0:12:08.000 --> 0:12:10.719 about it, I do. And it's a response and a 0:12:10.800 --> 0:12:14.080 concept I'm eager to leave behind in twenty twenty four 0:12:14.600 --> 0:12:19.120 for many reasons. First, busy is in everything. In fact, 0:12:19.280 --> 0:12:23.760 busy is oftentimes misused. Busy can be a defense, a 0:12:23.800 --> 0:12:26.840 form of sublimination, a way of ignoring other things you 0:12:26.880 --> 0:12:30.160 should be thinking about, like your happiness, or your mood state, 0:12:30.559 --> 0:12:33.720 or your mental or physical health. Finally, what does it 0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:36.679 say about us as a culture that when someone asks 0:12:36.760 --> 0:12:41.240 us sincerely how we're doing a personal question, we reply 0:12:41.360 --> 0:12:45.160 in a professional capacity that we're busy, and what about you? 0:12:45.200 --> 0:12:48.560 Are you busy too? In twenty twenty five, if someone 0:12:48.640 --> 0:12:51.400 calls to ask how I'm doing, I plan on giving 0:12:51.440 --> 0:12:54.319 them a straight, honest answer and the spirit of how 0:12:54.320 --> 0:12:56.960 the question was asked, one that has nothing to do 0:12:57.040 --> 0:13:00.720 with what's on my desk or in my calendar. For yourself, 0:13:01.120 --> 0:13:03.240 you might be surprised by the words that come out 0:13:03.280 --> 0:13:05.680 of your mouth. I think one of the biggest things 0:13:05.760 --> 0:13:09.240 I've seen here is that it's about how we believe 0:13:09.320 --> 0:13:12.040 we're valuable. So I would encourage you to all think 0:13:12.040 --> 0:13:14.880 about that. Do you feel your valuable, do you feel 0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:18.600 your day is effective and your day is a success 0:13:18.720 --> 0:13:21.640 because you're busy, or do you actually end the day 0:13:21.640 --> 0:13:25.240 and realize that a busy day was not a beautiful 0:13:25.320 --> 0:13:28.600 day or busy day maybe didn't even lead to the 0:13:28.640 --> 0:13:33.439 achievements and the effectiveness you wanted to have. And so, really, 0:13:33.480 --> 0:13:37.000 really take a moment to think about it, really, really 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:38.840 take a moment to figure out what do you want 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:40.720 the answer to that question to be. It may be 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:42.440 like I've got a lot on, but do you have 0:13:42.480 --> 0:13:44.199 a lot on? Because you think having a lot on 0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:47.880 is the right way to think about life. Now, we 0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:49.280 all have a lot to do, we all have a 0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:52.240 lot going on. But actually, are you just very organized? 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:57.040 Are you prioritized? Are you being effective? Are you being productive? 0:13:57.040 --> 0:13:59.839 What's the language that you want to use that creates 0:13:59.840 --> 0:14:05.520 a healthy relationship with yourself and the idea of being busy? Now? 0:14:05.600 --> 0:14:10.000 Number seven, turning down the noise when you think about it, 0:14:10.320 --> 0:14:12.920 Noise surrounds us. We wake up in the morning to 0:14:13.040 --> 0:14:16.240 traffic sounds, maybe a leaf blower or a lone mower 0:14:16.640 --> 0:14:19.480 coming from the neighbor's house. We hear the drip of 0:14:19.520 --> 0:14:23.520 the coffee maker, a dog barking, the sounds of children. Later, 0:14:23.680 --> 0:14:26.240 meeting a friend for brunch, and a local food spot 0:14:26.480 --> 0:14:29.360 was surrounded by the clink of silverware, the clash of 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:32.720 plates and bowls being set down or whisked away, the 0:14:32.840 --> 0:14:37.280 murmur and squall of other people talking. Music plays overhead constantly. 0:14:37.840 --> 0:14:40.760 It sometimes seems that wherever we go a clothing store, 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:43.640 a gas station, a coffee shop, a restaurant, a gym, 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:46.480 a song is playing, as if the riskiest thing in 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:48.720 the world is for any of us to be alone 0:14:48.760 --> 0:14:51.720 with our own thoughts. But when I talk about noise, 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:54.560 I'm not just talking about what comes in through our ears. 0:14:55.240 --> 0:14:58.240 I'm also talking about what is consumed by our eyes 0:14:58.720 --> 0:15:02.480 and our attention, and how the culture we inhabit seems 0:15:02.520 --> 0:15:07.000 intent on fragmenting the information we absorb, dividing it by two, 0:15:07.320 --> 0:15:10.720 then four, then ten, then one hundred. It's the opposite 0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:14.800 of depth, the opposite of learning and remembering. Instead, this 0:15:14.920 --> 0:15:18.040 kind of noise focuses on the surfaces of things. We 0:15:18.120 --> 0:15:21.640 scan headlines, we glance at our favorite websites, We scroll 0:15:21.720 --> 0:15:25.520 through photos and adversisements. We text instead of a call, 0:15:25.800 --> 0:15:28.920 and call instead of a meeting. What is noise if 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:32.200 not a soundtrack to our lives that interferes with what 0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:35.080 we should really be doing, which is to say, being 0:15:35.080 --> 0:15:38.440 attentive to ourselves and those around us. One thing I 0:15:38.440 --> 0:15:40.680 want to leave behind in twenty twenty four is the 0:15:40.760 --> 0:15:43.840 role I've allowed noise to play in my life. Noise 0:15:43.880 --> 0:15:48.320 refers to everything that is distracting, alluring, and diverting, the 0:15:48.360 --> 0:15:51.760 blinking silver bells of technology, and the pressure it puts 0:15:51.760 --> 0:15:55.240 on me not to walk, but to skip, to skim, 0:15:55.320 --> 0:15:58.280 and to speed read, a process deliberately designed to leave 0:15:58.320 --> 0:16:01.200 me and all of us wanting more and always playing 0:16:01.240 --> 0:16:04.360 catch up. Eliminating noise is one of the things I 0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:08.800 plan on leaving behind in twenty twenty four. Number six. 0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:11.000 Before I say this, I want to just put in 0:16:11.040 --> 0:16:13.880 a disclaimer because I think people may see it as 0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:17.200 me being defeatist, but it's not that. It's me being 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:21.000 a realist. I would call it the concept, not the 0:16:21.080 --> 0:16:24.680 idea or the fight for it, but the concept of 0:16:24.720 --> 0:16:26.840 how I see justice. So I still want to fight 0:16:26.880 --> 0:16:30.240 for justice, but the concept of it is different. Many 0:16:30.240 --> 0:16:32.360 of us want to believe that the world makes sense, 0:16:32.560 --> 0:16:36.000 that justice is a silent and animating presence in our lives. 0:16:36.320 --> 0:16:38.360 The idea that there may not be justice in the 0:16:38.400 --> 0:16:41.680 world makes most of us incredibly anxious. And when I 0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:44.440 say justice, I'm not talking about the judiciary or the 0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:48.280 local police and fire services. I mean the idea, no 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:51.520 doubt borrowed from movies and TV shows, that people who 0:16:51.520 --> 0:16:54.200 work hard are certain to get ahead, That if you 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:57.440 keep plugging away at something, you're guaranteed to see success. 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:00.920 That if you do everything in your power to selve relationship, 0:17:01.320 --> 0:17:05.000 that relationship will probably succeed. The thing is, as we know, 0:17:05.560 --> 0:17:08.680 life doesn't always work out this way. Causes and effects 0:17:08.720 --> 0:17:12.639 are far more random than we're comfortable admitting. Sometimes we 0:17:12.760 --> 0:17:15.160 have to face the fact that people we don't respect 0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:20.240 for mysterious and inexplicable reasons manage to triumph while other 0:17:20.280 --> 0:17:24.719 good people worthy of respect for short, that justice sometimes 0:17:24.840 --> 0:17:28.400 operates as we believe it should, but just as often doesn't. 0:17:29.119 --> 0:17:32.359 When we illusion the world, the likelier we are to 0:17:32.440 --> 0:17:35.639 find it disillusioning when the equations we hold in our 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:38.119 head don't work out as we'd expect to them to 0:17:38.920 --> 0:17:40.840 What I'm leaving behind in twenty twenty four is the 0:17:40.880 --> 0:17:44.360 idea of justice as an organizing principle of the universe. 0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:47.040 Sometimes things work out the way we expect and want 0:17:47.080 --> 0:17:50.480 them to, other times they don't. And the reasons why 0:17:50.480 --> 0:17:54.760 I'm mysterious, And perhaps that is a kind of justice. Actually, 0:17:54.760 --> 0:17:57.440 the universe does have justice, just not in the way 0:17:57.480 --> 0:17:59.960 we think about the math. So what does that mean? 0:18:01.040 --> 0:18:04.159 I would encourage us to walk away from waiting for 0:18:04.400 --> 0:18:08.199 justice and focusing on patterns. How can we study and 0:18:08.320 --> 0:18:12.280 create and build passions that will make that difference in 0:18:12.359 --> 0:18:16.080 our lives. That's what I'd consider. That's what I'd think about. 0:18:16.880 --> 0:18:20.600 Getting serious about light and dark is number five. Getting 0:18:20.640 --> 0:18:23.159 a good night's sleep matters. It's essential, in fact, to 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:26.119 our physical and mental health. Helps us maintain a healthy 0:18:26.119 --> 0:18:29.280 immune system, keeps our stress levels in check, and improves 0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:31.919 our thinking and processing. If we don't get enough of 0:18:31.960 --> 0:18:36.360 it can lead to fatigue, anger, poor focus, lowered productivity. 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:39.480 Like there's so many things connected to the quality of 0:18:39.480 --> 0:18:44.080 our sleep. It even contributes to health conditions like diabetes, obesity, 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:47.840 and cardiovascular disease. But growing research and evidence shows that 0:18:47.880 --> 0:18:50.800 sleep is even more crucial than any of us imagined. 0:18:51.280 --> 0:18:54.200 Today science supports the idea that sleep is the absolute 0:18:54.280 --> 0:18:57.800 foundation of our mental and physical health that it is 0:18:57.920 --> 0:19:01.080 or should be, the primary determinant of the success of 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:04.480 every one of our human endeavors. This means it's important 0:19:04.520 --> 0:19:10.680 to differentiate, really differentiate between lightness and darkness. First, let's 0:19:10.720 --> 0:19:14.359 talk about light. It is two separate components. People who 0:19:14.440 --> 0:19:16.679 try to get light in their eyes first in the morning, 0:19:16.800 --> 0:19:20.320 whether they're sitting outside or next to a strong sads 0:19:20.480 --> 0:19:24.040 lamp example, one with at least ten thousand lucks meaning 0:19:24.080 --> 0:19:26.760 not a bedside lamp or the light that comes from screens, 0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:30.960 have dramatically better fitter mental health than those who don't 0:19:30.960 --> 0:19:34.639 make getting morning light a priority. Twenty minutes is all 0:19:34.680 --> 0:19:38.360 anyone needs, with sunlight being the best source. Studies show 0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:40.840 that getting light first thing in the morning also has 0:19:40.840 --> 0:19:44.480 a positive effect on people who suffer from anxiety and depression. 0:19:45.200 --> 0:19:47.720 Access strong light early in the day and you will 0:19:47.760 --> 0:19:51.639 feel stronger and more invigorated, thereby setting the stage for 0:19:51.720 --> 0:19:54.879 a better night's sleep. A good night's sleep starts in 0:19:54.920 --> 0:19:57.639 the morning, cut to night time, where the presence of 0:19:57.720 --> 0:20:00.800 light plays havoc with a good night's sleep. Studies show 0:20:00.840 --> 0:20:03.640 that if we keep our bedroom environment as dark as possible, 0:20:03.960 --> 0:20:06.399 we will see the benefits in our own mental health. 0:20:06.960 --> 0:20:10.119 At night, dim all the lights, avoid screens for at 0:20:10.160 --> 0:20:13.199 least an hour before bedtime, and that includes reading on 0:20:13.240 --> 0:20:16.399 your kindle. Invest in a sleep mask. A big element 0:20:16.440 --> 0:20:21.760 of insomnia has to do with our nighttime exposure to light, light, dark. 0:20:22.000 --> 0:20:25.160 Simple as that, A simple change I plan to adapt 0:20:25.240 --> 0:20:29.639 in twenty twenty five. Number four is self criticism. We 0:20:29.720 --> 0:20:32.080 all have a judge and a jury in our own heads. 0:20:32.320 --> 0:20:34.440 You should have done this, you should have done that, 0:20:34.800 --> 0:20:38.040 you messed up, you're late. Sometimes that voice in our 0:20:38.080 --> 0:20:42.240 head is useful and potentially productive. It keeps us working hard, disciplined, 0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:45.280 and helps keep the trains running on time. But it 0:20:45.320 --> 0:20:49.040 can blur into something else too, a monologue of self denigration, 0:20:49.320 --> 0:20:52.399 the accusation that you never measured up to your own standards. 0:20:52.800 --> 0:20:56.600 Like most people, I can fall into this myself sometimes, 0:20:56.640 --> 0:20:59.120 and in twenty twenty four, my goal is to leave 0:20:59.160 --> 0:21:02.040 this kind of insight talk behind. I can't help but 0:21:02.080 --> 0:21:05.320 think back to something someone said to me once. Imagine 0:21:05.320 --> 0:21:08.080 yourself talking to a friend or someone you just met 0:21:08.080 --> 0:21:11.120 at a party the same way you address yourself inside 0:21:11.160 --> 0:21:14.200 your own head. Chances are your friend would burst into 0:21:14.240 --> 0:21:16.800 tears and walk away, and the person at the party 0:21:16.840 --> 0:21:20.080 would excuse himself for herself to go refresh their drink 0:21:20.320 --> 0:21:22.439 in the hopes they never have to talk to you again. 0:21:23.160 --> 0:21:26.520 This will sound advice in twenty twenty five, I'll retain 0:21:26.600 --> 0:21:29.760 the right quality of self criticism, the kind that makes 0:21:29.760 --> 0:21:34.520 me better, kinder, more positive, and more productive. But as 0:21:34.560 --> 0:21:37.360 with the other darker stuff, I remember to ask myself, 0:21:37.920 --> 0:21:40.840 are you treating yourself the same way you do a 0:21:40.840 --> 0:21:43.680 close friend? And that doesn't mean that you don't need 0:21:43.760 --> 0:21:45.800 tough love Sometimes it doesn't mean you don't need a 0:21:45.840 --> 0:21:48.480 push or a nudge. What it means is we don't 0:21:48.520 --> 0:21:51.280 have to denigrate ourself in a way that we wouldn't 0:21:51.280 --> 0:21:55.679 talk to anyone we love. Number three is waiting for 0:21:55.720 --> 0:21:59.120 the perfect time. It's so easy to put our goals aside, 0:21:59.480 --> 0:22:02.040 to wait for the perfect time, almost as though we're 0:22:02.080 --> 0:22:04.800 expecting a lightning bolt and a rack of thunder to 0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:07.840 rumble overhead, a signal that it's time to go ahead 0:22:07.840 --> 0:22:10.560 with our plans to travel and to pursue our passions 0:22:10.920 --> 0:22:13.119 and start that thing we've been putting off for longer 0:22:13.119 --> 0:22:15.959 than we remember. I'll do it as soon as we 0:22:16.000 --> 0:22:18.600 tell ourselves, as soon as the weather changes, as soon 0:22:18.640 --> 0:22:20.680 as the car gets fixed, as soon as I feel 0:22:20.720 --> 0:22:24.120 more settled. We all do this, and sometimes I find 0:22:24.119 --> 0:22:27.639 myself doing it as well, waiting for the perfect moment, 0:22:27.720 --> 0:22:32.800 the perfect time, the perfect sequence of months. Well, everyone 0:22:32.800 --> 0:22:36.479 who's listening right now, there's no such thing as the 0:22:36.480 --> 0:22:40.240 perfect time. There's no such thing as the perfect moment. 0:22:41.040 --> 0:22:45.200 There's no such thing as the perfect anything. Perfect is 0:22:45.240 --> 0:22:49.919 a concept taken from eternity. Perfect is a concept that 0:22:50.000 --> 0:22:53.680 we've subscribed to for far too long, and it's blocking 0:22:53.800 --> 0:22:58.640 us from starting. Don't let perfect stop you from starting. 0:22:59.480 --> 0:23:04.560 Don't let perfect stop you from creating. Don't let perfect 0:23:04.960 --> 0:23:09.760 stop you from trying. Don't let perfect stop you from practice. 0:23:10.240 --> 0:23:15.760 Don't let perfect stop you from progress. Don't let perfect 0:23:16.520 --> 0:23:21.199 stop you from understanding your potential. If you wait for 0:23:21.280 --> 0:23:24.080 the perfect time to do something, I can guarantee you'll 0:23:24.160 --> 0:23:26.920 be waiting for the rest of your life. In twenty 0:23:26.960 --> 0:23:29.760 twenty five, I am pledging that I will no longer 0:23:29.800 --> 0:23:33.280 put important things things I want to do off. Life 0:23:33.320 --> 0:23:35.520 is long, but it's also over before you know it. 0:23:36.160 --> 0:23:41.080 Start what you want to do now? Number two. As 0:23:41.080 --> 0:23:44.360 we get down to the final two. Number two, when 0:23:44.359 --> 0:23:47.280 we hear the words mediocre or mediocrity, our minds go 0:23:47.320 --> 0:23:51.280 back to school or college. We associate mediocre with SOSO grades, 0:23:51.440 --> 0:23:54.679 B minuses and C pluses, and with sloppiness or an 0:23:54.680 --> 0:23:57.800 absence of effort. Who would ever want to be mediocre? 0:23:58.200 --> 0:24:00.480 We would ever want to be a mediocre a partner, 0:24:00.600 --> 0:24:04.000 mediocre friends, a mediocre job, a mediocre car, or even 0:24:04.000 --> 0:24:07.840 a mediocre dog or cat. Fair enough, But I'm not 0:24:07.960 --> 0:24:11.920 using the word mediocre in the conventional sense. I'm using 0:24:12.000 --> 0:24:15.000 it in the sense of finding balance in our overstressed, 0:24:15.400 --> 0:24:19.600 over busy, often imbalance lives. I know I'm not alone 0:24:19.680 --> 0:24:24.240 and occasionally going to extremes, traveling too much, working too much, 0:24:24.640 --> 0:24:28.200