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Speaker 1: Well, wellcome back to another episode of Alchemy, this COVID nineteendition.

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Speaker 1: I'm your host, Kevin Polly, Yes that Kevin Bob. No,

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Speaker 1: I won't get my j dob my day my j job.

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Speaker 1: Take two, Kevin coom, we get one more? You bet jomp.

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Speaker 1: What's that? No, I won't quit my day job. Thanks,

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Speaker 1: but I digress. Let's me show you no particularly order

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Speaker 1: to say hello to James Geny jackie Gin card favorite

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Speaker 1: board game? Oh my god, I believe it might be

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Speaker 1: called Zombie Side. Uh, it's a cooperative. Actually no, it's Pandemic.

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Speaker 1: I think Pandemic is my favorite board game. I like

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Speaker 1: cooperative board games fair enough, backed by popular demand. It's

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Speaker 1: Jacqueline new Way group favor. What class in middle school

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Speaker 1: did you excel in? Oh? Um, I was really good

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Speaker 1: at math and I was a mathlete. But I was

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Speaker 1: only a mathlete because I sold a lot of chocolate

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Speaker 1: for the math club. But I never competed. But I

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Speaker 1: got the jacket because I sold a lot of chocolate.

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Speaker 1: And where was your favorite sales spot? Just really like

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Speaker 1: right before class, right before class, right before lunch. You know,

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Speaker 1: you hit them the kids that didn't have lunch money

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Speaker 1: or that you know they need a little snack. So

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Speaker 1: it's pretty good. So that's heads up ball. We call

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Speaker 1: that look out. It's Craig Atkowski Coacao. Do you like

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Speaker 1: a spot show and if so, can I send you

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Speaker 1: a super easy recipe? I like piping hot piping weird.

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Speaker 1: This is where we do not see I to spoon

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Speaker 1: hand in your shoes. It's christal Varado. Christopher never cross

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Speaker 1: pancakes or French toast you motherfucker now here and now

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do it. I'm not playing your games, sir,

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Speaker 1: not playing younger games. That is a correct answer. And last,

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Speaker 1: but plenty of poop for you if you think of

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Speaker 1: least it's Joey Greer half a peach for a head.

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Speaker 1: Finish this joke. Two Jews walk into a bar, um

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Speaker 1: um walking to a bar and the bartender says what

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Speaker 1: can I get you? And the two juicemen say, um,

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Speaker 1: we just want something that's off the top. I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: The correct answer was correct answer was, and they buy it.

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Speaker 1: Let's do a damn show shoe. I like the use

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Speaker 1: of the two jewsman, Joey Jews, thank you for not

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Speaker 1: letting that set most All of our scene suggestions are

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Speaker 1: gathering from a listener, emails or from our patroon v

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Speaker 1: I p s to become a h and supporter of

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Speaker 1: the show and enjoy exclusive content another fine purse. Just

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Speaker 1: head on over to patreon dot com slash alchemy this.

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Speaker 1: If you'd like to submit a scene suggested by email,

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Speaker 1: please write to the podcast your name here at all

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Speaker 1: gemy this dot com. That's your name here alchemy this

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Speaker 1: dot com. Say it one comes from patron v I

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Speaker 1: P Jamie Garcia, who wrote, I think Jamie Garcia actually

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Speaker 1: might be an Alchemania come to think of it, uh,

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Speaker 1: he wrote, or Jamie could be a gal I got

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Speaker 1: one here in the house. I'm so goddamn happy. Vanessa

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Speaker 1: is back her snoop of voice is the best scene

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Speaker 1: suggestion and amateur kidnapping. Many thanks and much love to

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Speaker 1: you all. Thank you, Jamie, I don't care. Let's just

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Speaker 1: let listen. I'm gonna put gold throughout this house the

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Speaker 1: way I see fit Claudia, and that's just how it's

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Speaker 1: going to be. You understand, I understand, Yo, Yeah, put it,

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Speaker 1: put it wherever you want. But if you put it there,

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Speaker 1: you'll know you'll you'll lose some other things. What are

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Speaker 1: you trying to say? What kind of threat is this, Claudia?

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Speaker 1: What other things will I lose? Do you think I'll

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Speaker 1: cook for you still? Darryl? Do you think I Do

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Speaker 1: you think I'll make love? Do you anymore? Darrell? Do

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Speaker 1: you put gold everywhere? I won't. I won't have it.

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Speaker 1: Do you think I'll lose that? I've lost my appetite

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Speaker 1: for both of those things? Squad, It's been decades since

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Speaker 1: either of them had the flavor flavor. You asked me

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Speaker 1: to bring pickles into the bedroom and I and I

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Speaker 1: you know I don't like pickles, and I did it

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Speaker 1: is my lover loves pickleback, so I'll bring them into

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Speaker 1: the bedroom. And you think I'm not bringing any flavor

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Speaker 1: in it? Do you put that on me? Claudia? Darryl? Hey, guys, um,

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Speaker 1: this is Claudia. I clean her pool. She um the

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Speaker 1: only picture of her you could find. Oh yeah, this

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Speaker 1: is the only that's on my phone. I can make

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Speaker 1: it swipe right, swap. Let's say what else we got? Well,

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think it matters that that's who

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Speaker 1: it is. I think it's more of like the problem

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Speaker 1: are you sending these pictures out of people? No? Taking

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Speaker 1: other look at it. Wait, I'm on I'm on her.

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Speaker 1: I'm on her Instagram account, just showing you what what

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Speaker 1: what our victim? Right? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, you're sign she's

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Speaker 1: she's the one with kidnapping. Yeah, let me just give me,

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Speaker 1: just do my I had a whole thing set up here.

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Speaker 1: There's just not the time for questions. Yeah, not the

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Speaker 1: time here. I'll start again. Hey, guys, this is what

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Speaker 1: we know for questions. Um, you'll feel it. There will

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Speaker 1: be like a lull. There will be a lull now, okay,

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Speaker 1: but it's not like that. But but starting now, Hey guys,

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Speaker 1: this is Claudia. I clean her pool. They have Mega

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Speaker 1: Mega Bucks. As a matter of fact, her husband just

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Speaker 1: put every meeting. I'm sorry, miss anything, you know what

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Speaker 1: I it ends up there three cleaning, so ahead of

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Speaker 1: drive around the circles like three times. Sorry sorry, uh,

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Speaker 1: act like I already heard what's going on and just

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Speaker 1: st Okay, all right, here's what you need to know.

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Speaker 1: Though she is sweet, I don't want to hurt her.

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Speaker 1: I don't say it's her husband who's the asshole. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So he goes in the bag excuse me. He goes

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Speaker 1: in the bag questions, I didn't bring a big enough

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Speaker 1: bag for a full growth. Man. We're gonna kill her

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Speaker 1: and hold her is ransom, and that asshole will have

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Speaker 1: to pay to get her back, and then we'll give

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Speaker 1: her even some of the money and she can get

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Speaker 1: out of that house, which by the way, has solid

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Speaker 1: gold appliances. It's just a home that's filled with love

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Speaker 1: or the good question. Yea, it used to be. And

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Speaker 1: Claudia is clined. She wants that love, she needs that love,

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Speaker 1: but this asshole isn't given it to her. So while

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Speaker 1: she's in our care, I say we be extra sweet

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Speaker 1: to her. Does the money come out of the asshole? Oh? Wow?

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Speaker 1: Does he have money shooting out of his own asshole?

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Speaker 1: I think I don't think that's what he means. Thank you?

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Speaker 1: Is that what you mean? Thanks? Like guy, appreciate it.

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Speaker 1: He told you, I just don't want to get a

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Speaker 1: parking ticket. All of a sudden'll be cleaning her pool.

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Speaker 1: I'll be cleaning her pool tomorrow, Benjim so much her

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Speaker 1: hair off. The pool is so dirty. It's dirty, and

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Speaker 1: it's just it's just it's full of dirt and algae.

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Speaker 1: And my tears. You know, I've cried so much this week.

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Speaker 1: They just cry so much. It's so nice I talk

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Speaker 1: to you. You know, you one of the poles. You

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Speaker 1: can just take on my emotional baggage. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's that's right. I'm here for you. You know that, right, Claudia.

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Speaker 1: I don't just clean your pools. I want to clean

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Speaker 1: your I don't have another like, I don't have an analogy,

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Speaker 1: but I want to be here for you. We want

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Speaker 1: to clean your pool as well. M okay yah, Sorry, yeah, guys,

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Speaker 1: I didn't give the signal this. These are my friends. Um,

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Speaker 1: they're actually they clean pools overseas, so they're really international

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Speaker 1: pool cleaners. Ship me. I just I just cleaned pools

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Speaker 1: around the area. That's Jersey, Mike, don't mind him. I

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Speaker 1: didn't know Paul people had friends. This is amazing. See

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Speaker 1: you guys, fellas, when I tell you she's I told

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Speaker 1: them all about you. Claudia, looks like there's a lot

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Speaker 1: of golden side. Get me started. There is. It's everywhere.

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Speaker 1: It's disgusting. I just want to get it out. Tell

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Speaker 1: us more, duchess. Oh about the gold Yeah, we have

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Speaker 1: a gold blender. We have we have a gold pet egg.

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Speaker 1: We have a gold autament. I mean it's just did

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Speaker 1: you say a gold pet egg? Yes, came from the

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Speaker 1: pet thing. No, it's for the feet, it's for your

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Speaker 1: feet pea. Yes. And it's like the mannamed Petty Doug

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Speaker 1: for Fox Shake Man part along. Yeah, you were saying, duchess.

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Speaker 1: I was just saying, I mean, it's a gold peddic.

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Speaker 1: Who needs a gold peddic? I guess Darryl does, and

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Speaker 1: that's what satisfies him. Because I can't do it anymore.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't hate having it. Everybody. Everybody, everybody I'm cleaning,

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Speaker 1: I'll take one of them golden blended. No, we're not

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Speaker 1: here to ask for things from her, from her Caudier.

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Speaker 1: I mean that's just how it is. Um. But I

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Speaker 1: understand you have to go back into your office, so

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Speaker 1: I get that. But do you know if you if

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Speaker 1: you if you want to stick around, you feel free.

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Speaker 1: You're more than welcome to Sean. I don't. You don't

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Speaker 1: need to run off to the other of the things

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Speaker 1: you've got going on, So feel free to stick around.

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Speaker 1: Feel free to stick around if you don't want to,

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Speaker 1: you don't have to. But you know it's okay. The

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Speaker 1: door is obviously open. I'm saying that's figuratively shut in

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Speaker 1: the sense of like you can stay here, you can

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Speaker 1: hang out. You know, you don't have to you don't

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Speaker 1: have to vomitos. Okay, Um, actually I gotta take a call,

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Speaker 1: So why don't you just say? Wait? I usually just

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Speaker 1: get shuffled off so quick afterwards. I just didn't know

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Speaker 1: what to say. I'm stunned. I feel like I've got

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Speaker 1: a new friend. Yeah. Um, look a lot of Darrell

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Speaker 1: has been kind of breathing down everyone's neck. I don't

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Speaker 1: know what the hell is going on at home. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I do know, I don't know. Darryl just treat me

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Speaker 1: like I'm new and I don't know who Dar is.

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Speaker 1: So you want me to just like unravel the backstories

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Speaker 1: that what you're asking. Yeah, go ahead, go ahead and

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Speaker 1: unravel the backstory, alright, Sean, It's just kind of strange.

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Speaker 1: I've been working here for X years. Let's see how

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Speaker 1: we're okay, let me see where do you begin with this?

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Speaker 1: Um shout? I feel like you know all the information

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Speaker 1: I know, so it's strange for me to kind of

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Speaker 1: just like bring this up again. In a way that's exposition. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: let's just do this. What's your step outside? I gotta

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Speaker 1: make this call. You just told me I could stay

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Speaker 1: as long as I wanted it in your office. Is

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Speaker 1: the first time I've ever come in here and you

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Speaker 1: treated me like, you know, a coworker instead of a minion. Look,

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Speaker 1: I know, I top down. Darryl's kind of a drill sergeant,

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Speaker 1: you know, and it just makes us all feel like

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Speaker 1: we're just objects. We're just objects filling up this office

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Speaker 1: building right there. You can just kinda do with what. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I am. I bet you both of us together could

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Speaker 1: take Darrel out. You shouldn't murder him. I mean, yeah,

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Speaker 1: close the door, That's what I was saying. I am

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Speaker 1: closing it. So you're scared of Darryl. I just want

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Speaker 1: to ease you. Let's let's do it. Okay. Well, gentlemen,

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Speaker 1: you're right to uh to hire a professional kidnapper. Don't

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Speaker 1: not work with amateurs, Okay, don't not work Okay I'm

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Speaker 1: misspoke a little bit there, but normally I'm very professional. Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's the first time we're talking to you, and that's

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Speaker 1: not a good sign. Okay. Look, I haven't had lunch

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Speaker 1: yet and my blood sugar is low? All right? Did

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Speaker 1: you want a candy bar something? Don't not eat lunch,

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Speaker 1: don't not eat. Look, I'm a professional kidnapper. I am

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Speaker 1: fully licensed and bonded by the States. Uh. If you

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Speaker 1: go to my website there are tons of testimonials from

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Speaker 1: previous people who have hired me, like amateur kidnappers are

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Speaker 1: going to prove of kidnappers. It will do it for

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Speaker 1: half the price. Okay, well, then you get what you

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Speaker 1: pay for. Sean. We want it done right exactly. We

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Speaker 1: want it done so he just he's We don't. We

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Speaker 1: don't want him kidnapped. I don't know where that kind

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Speaker 1: of got miss miss line there. We want to dad,

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Speaker 1: we want his ask Dad. Okay, well you called me,

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Speaker 1: you called me, well, Sean called you, and I don't

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Speaker 1: know what the hell happened, Seohn, Well, I wanted to um, Claudie.

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Speaker 1: Can I have a second of your time? Of course? Look?

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Speaker 1: I like you so much. Can we have it this?

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Speaker 1: Smighty go? Can we have this curtain? O? Yes, take it?

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Speaker 1: Please take the curtains. You don't have to say yes,

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Speaker 1: you don't. It's Look, I'm gonna be up front with you.

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Speaker 1: These aren't my friends. These are amateur kidnappers, and we're

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Speaker 1: here to kidnap you. Benji, is this is this role play?

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Speaker 1: No respect? Knock knock, O pool man, pool a man here? Oh,

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Speaker 1: come in, Come in, Hi. I'm a pool man here

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Speaker 1: to uh to service your pool? Are you going to

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Speaker 1: vacuum it? Wait? I'm no stop, I'm the pool guy here.

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Speaker 1: Oh man? Yeah, so you already you already are working

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Speaker 1: here as a pool guy. I'm already working here. Well, well,

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Speaker 1: little where we go here? You trying to crouch on

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Speaker 1: us what we're doing. You're not gonna kidnap him? I

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Speaker 1: s ours step off. So you guys still haven't gone

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Speaker 1: pro yet. Huh? Still working there. We're working on We're

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Speaker 1: working on it. We don't need to be judged by you, flappy. Look,

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Speaker 1: I've been on the circuit for years now, Okay, this

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Speaker 1: one circuit you left our crew long ago. All right,

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Speaker 1: there's a reason why you left. One sponsorship. You got

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Speaker 1: sponsored by Vans, not the shoe company. That's like you

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Speaker 1: got by big black Vandy, the vehicle, Yeah, the generic

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Speaker 1: equal of a van. Look, listen, we've got experience too.

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Speaker 1: When you add all four of our experiences up, it's

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Speaker 1: almost equal to yours. So who's professional now? M Okay,

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Speaker 1: how much you paying them? Lady? How much you paying them? Oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm not paying them. My husband's paying them. But don't fight. Yeah, yeah, y'all.

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Speaker 1: I haven't had lunch. I didn't get my candy barton today.

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Speaker 1: I'm down for the group thing. I mean, I like

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Speaker 1: it all all right, pro and I mean that's just

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Speaker 1: kind of where I come into it, though, But I

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Speaker 1: get that. I know you gotta get back to your office.

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Speaker 1: And also I don't mind. I don't have an office. Actually,

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Speaker 1: that's why I've been trying to chill here with you.

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Speaker 1: I figured there was an extra little bit of corner

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Speaker 1: over there. I mean, if we move that fern, I

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Speaker 1: could set up a small desk in your office. I

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Speaker 1: mean I can see that, like in like a toddler

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Speaker 1: sized desk over in the corner with you. Scene one

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Speaker 1: the toddler size desk everybody seemed to comes to us

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Speaker 1: from listener email from Carrie, who simply wrote, truck stop

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Speaker 1: in space. Thank you so much, Carrie. M Yeah, let

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Speaker 1: me get one of them floating hot dogs if you

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Speaker 1: don't mind. And when floating hand big one floating hot

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Speaker 1: dog coming up right now? Order up them floating pieces

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Speaker 1: of pizza. One piece of floating pizza. What floating piancer?

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Speaker 1: Coming up right now? Here's your one piece of floating pizza.

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Speaker 1: Let me get uh six of them? Hot wings are

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Speaker 1: just sitting in that vata. I don't know what the hell?

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Speaker 1: What is that crowley in the oil? Yes, it is

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Speaker 1: cruelingly leonoia. Would you like me to just put it

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Speaker 1: into the bucon? Yeah, that'd be fun. He's gonna put

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Speaker 1: this ston oiled wings just straight into the bucking Okay,

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Speaker 1: sir out there man pretty hard like just getting crazy,

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Speaker 1: worry a lot of ordering a lot of food, are

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Speaker 1: are you? Yeah? I got a long ride, so I

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Speaker 1: just got one floating hot dog, one floating pizza, and

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Speaker 1: then six wings, so I'm famished? All right? Yeah? Would

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Speaker 1: you like some lead? Would you sure? Carpet Come carpet,

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Speaker 1: Hold on, carpet, hold on? All right? Every time I

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Speaker 1: pull into the station, you're around here. Tell me you're hungry,

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Speaker 1: you haven't eaten. I see you in the back by

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Speaker 1: the bathroom. I mean you're huffing burgers, carport. You're eating good.

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Speaker 1: You're eating good in this neighborhood. What's your point? Thank you, sir.

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Speaker 1: I can't stand here all I can't stand here all

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Speaker 1: day without chiming in at some point. My point is

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Speaker 1: my rig needs another driver, and I think he could

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Speaker 1: do you a lot of good by getting up. Want

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Speaker 1: to need another lover? All? Right? Now? This is where?

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Speaker 1: Can I just get the check? I don't if you've

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Speaker 1: actually placed an order against there? Are you with them?

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Speaker 1: Definitely not? Okay? Well, then perhaps we should wait until

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Speaker 1: you make an order before I give you your cheek?

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Speaker 1: Can I have a question? Ask you a question? There

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Speaker 1: me skip yep yep um. Where are you from? Well?

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Speaker 1: I'm from planet ghibling Gear. I grew up there, but

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Speaker 1: I've been traveling ever since. I find that the people

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Speaker 1: that come into this truck step makes me feel worldly traveled. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: spa en fair a little bit too much information. I

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Speaker 1: simply asked where you are from? But I told you

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Speaker 1: I get used and be used daily for snacks. I'm

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Speaker 1: looking for someone to put an end to that. For that,

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Speaker 1: what I'm offering, I said, just drive one of the rigs.

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Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. A job. What the hell you want?

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Speaker 1: Then that's all I can give you you okay, sir,

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Speaker 1: I'm ready to take your order. Yeah, you son. One

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Speaker 1: day you're gonna leave planet Ghibbla Gear. Okay, and you're

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Speaker 1: gonna go out there. There's a big world out there.

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Speaker 1: And look, you have a strange voice, stranger than anybody

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Speaker 1: on planet Ghibbla Gear. You do you do? You speak

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Speaker 1: in a weird accent, and it's none of us do that. Uh.

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Speaker 1: And people are gonna make assumptions about Giblgarians based on

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Speaker 1: how you talk. Okay, Mommy, do I have a strange voice? No, honey,

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Speaker 1: you have a beautiful voice. Oh he doesn't. He doesn't. Marge,

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Speaker 1: don't tell you, don't Okay, don't do this. It's okay.

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Speaker 1: He has a fine voice. I'm gonna get you in

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Speaker 1: speech classes. Okay, Homer, he sounds fine. Please just let

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Speaker 1: him live his life. Are you supposed to work in

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Speaker 1: customer service with a voice like that? Oh? My gosh,

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Speaker 1: just because you failed, and it doesn't mean that he will. Look,

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Speaker 1: I failed customer service, but excelled in economics and science.

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Speaker 1: But so what we live in this palatial estate? Do

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Speaker 1: we want that? Like? It's thanks to me, the Giblagarians

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Speaker 1: are able to go out into the universe and work

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Speaker 1: bing bong. Now get the jewelry. Okay, don't get it. Hi, yes, great,

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Speaker 1: he's money. He answer. My My name is here, Let

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Speaker 1: me call her for you. M is the Would you

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Speaker 1: like to step inside while you wait? And that's pretty good? Here?

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Speaker 1: Thank you? Oh my god, Oh my god, you listen.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't, I don't. I don't have the stones. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I don't know where they're buried. I told you that

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Speaker 1: I'll take the kids in. Oh god, fine, fine, deal

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Speaker 1: bag him up. It's coming away. Who is that? No one?

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Speaker 1: So I thought I would make a celery steak. That

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Speaker 1: sounds good. I'd love a celery steak. And then I

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Speaker 1: thought about just just heating up some water and pouring

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Speaker 1: that in our fins, and then, um, you know, and

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Speaker 1: that is how I came to be at this truck stop.

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Speaker 1: Is that better the full story, sir? I'm reading to

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Speaker 1: take your order? Oh wow, that is uh yeah. Let

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00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:09,040
Speaker 1: me just get to dibble dogs and dogs dogs and

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Speaker 1: a diet and one day where all right, now, everyone

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Speaker 1: just shut up for a goddamn second. Okay, look, I'm

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Speaker 1: finally I'm gonna I'm gonna pull over into this goddamn

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Speaker 1: truck stop, all right, and I'm gonna ask for direction. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I am an asshole, and I'm gonna tighten up even more. Okay.

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Speaker 1: Now I'm gonna get in there, and I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to get into snacks. Don't need snacks, don't need snuggers

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Speaker 1: light years from another truck stop, and you're just gonna

345
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Speaker 1: have to deal with it. But if you need to

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Speaker 1: use a restroom, dude, because I'm not holding over and

347
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Speaker 1: get sucked into some kind of gravitational pool by an

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Speaker 1: asteroid passing by or a planet to get me a

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Speaker 1: peg of bags. J Okay, don't leave me here. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna go with you. Let's go. We get Grandpa say

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Speaker 1: rhets please, then we just go into suspended animation. No

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Speaker 1: you can, I'm not paying for that. This is a

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Speaker 1: trip for all of us to remember an experience. Okay.

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Speaker 1: Let's space is boring. It is boring. Okay, And can

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Speaker 1: I can I tell you some hunter? Okay, you're you're

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Speaker 1: my son's friend. I didn't even want you to be

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Speaker 1: on this guy trip. I didn't want to be trip. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know you didn't need it okay, And so guess

359
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Speaker 1: what I'm thinking. He's Zarah. What if we Yes, what

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00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:33,560
Speaker 1: if we hitchhike tied to here? That would be cool.

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Speaker 1: We hit like another family that gives us snacks when

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Speaker 1: we want them. Yeah, yeah, a family that gives us

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00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 1: a lot of zigger snacks and a lot of zincs zinks. Yeah, Sarah,

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00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,399
Speaker 1: Sarah and zosiph on the road. I like the sound

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Speaker 1: of the sound of that. Look, Carbet, Look, I went

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Speaker 1: into your stomach and your time boarded me through it,

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Speaker 1: and I get it, all right, But look, did you

368
00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:04,560
Speaker 1: It was terrifying? All right? It was goddamn scary. You

369
00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:07,040
Speaker 1: got those snake worms from doone in there? Now listen,

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Speaker 1: I got a smaller rig for you, all right now,

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Speaker 1: if you want to take that around, I think we

372
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,720
Speaker 1: can get some different things going for all right. Now,

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Speaker 1: I gotta get going for us now, Carpet, I gotta

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Speaker 1: get going. Here the keys, all right, I'm out. Okay,

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Speaker 1: which one is it? Oh, it's that one? Get away

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Speaker 1: little kids, professional driver coming through? No, Sarah, that's our chance.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, with that lady. Think she's she looks beat,

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Speaker 1: She really do. She's got a trash, but I mean

379
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Speaker 1: she's got a car. That's right, she's got a car.

380
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Speaker 1: Maybe she could look. My parents said I could go

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Speaker 1: with you for two weeks. It's been five years. Yeah,

382
00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:57,840
Speaker 1: well guess what. Okay, I took a wrong turn. That's

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Speaker 1: why I'm in here asking for directions. Hunter. We went

384
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Speaker 1: into a black hole and I'm aging backwards now. Is

385
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:06,600
Speaker 1: that I was eighteen when we started, and now you're thirteen.

386
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Speaker 1: You get to relive all those bad choices. I don't

387
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Speaker 1: want to be thirteen again. Well that's where you're That's

388
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:14,920
Speaker 1: where we're at. Okay, that's where you're at. The other way.

389
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Speaker 1: We can't go to the other way. Okay, we're gonna

390
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: miss all the different you know stars. So as you

391
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Speaker 1: can see, I'm just gonna stop the film right here. Uh,

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Speaker 1: this is the point where we decided to call the

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Speaker 1: film thirteen again, and we feel it might be a

394
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Speaker 1: little on the nose. Your the type of questions. You're

395
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Speaker 1: the test group. This is the questions. Now is gonna

396
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,879
Speaker 1: be questions at the end? Right now? Please? Any question

397
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Speaker 1: you have. I came in late and I didn't see

398
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:46,280
Speaker 1: a lot of it. Um, so I was kind of

399
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:51,239
Speaker 1: wondering what's happening in the movie. Great question. Right here,

400
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:55,360
Speaker 1: everybody right here. So the idea is it's somebody showing

401
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:59,240
Speaker 1: a test group. Uh you know why, why would that

402
00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:02,359
Speaker 1: be interesting? Well maybe it's not. And that's why you

403
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:05,760
Speaker 1: can hit the red button in front of you. Anytime

404
00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:08,160
Speaker 1: I say something not interesting, you hit the red button.

405
00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:10,840
Speaker 1: I'm gonna pause this right here, and uh, look, do

406
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:16,480
Speaker 1: you mind stepping in to my office real quick? Yeah? Okay, Um,

407
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,719
Speaker 1: I don't understand. All right. I give you a budget

408
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 1: of thirty million dollars and this is where you're coming.

409
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:24,879
Speaker 1: This isn't choose your own adventure. Okay, we're trying to

410
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:27,520
Speaker 1: recapture what bander snatched it, all right? They want to

411
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:36,440
Speaker 1: fucking Emmy, Emmy, which onesday? Emmy? The Sarah, Yes, don't,

412
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:39,399
Speaker 1: don't make any moves. But I think we're I think

413
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 1: we're in a movie. I feel that too. I feel

414
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:46,479
Speaker 1: like we're at the climax, and so one of us

415
00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:50,439
Speaker 1: is probably about to die. I hope it's me. Okay,

416
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:52,560
Speaker 1: I was hoping the same thing. I've got a lot

417
00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:56,359
Speaker 1: of life to live, all right. Why don't we uh,

418
00:26:56,760 --> 00:26:58,480
Speaker 1: why don't we hop in that big grade with that lady.

419
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: I'm sure something bad to happen. Guys, guys, guys, hold on,

420
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 1: hold on. We're waiting for the viewer to make the

421
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,160
Speaker 1: choice of which one of you dies, and they're they're

422
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 1: kind of stalling, so we haven't quite decided what's next.

423
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 1: Just keep it down. Yeah, I'll take the trash out

424
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 1: in a second. I'm watching something right now. Okay, I

425
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,359
Speaker 1: just want you to take the trash out now, but

426
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:22,399
Speaker 1: I'm doing I have to choose which kid dies? Okay,

427
00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 1: can I just pick one kid? Then? Then? Oh my god,

428
00:27:29,080 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 1: don't unplug it, don't uply it the fu goddamn Sarah, Sarah.

429
00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:39,440
Speaker 1: While we're while we're hearing the suspension waiting, I want

430
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:42,000
Speaker 1: to say I'm sorry for ever being a brat or

431
00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 1: not a good big brother. You know, I'm so glad

432
00:27:44,640 --> 00:27:52,959
Speaker 1: you said that. You said that because it's You've been real, Sittya,

433
00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:57,359
Speaker 1: You're complete. Okay, it's been real hard be in me.

434
00:27:57,760 --> 00:27:59,920
Speaker 1: So if there was someone to die, like I said,

435
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 1: I would zooze you. Yeah, I know, I understand, sir.

436
00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:05,320
Speaker 1: Have they made it? Have they made the choice yet?

437
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,919
Speaker 1: I this is the first time this has ever happened,

438
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,760
Speaker 1: but it seems like fuck, Destiny's in her own sucking hands.

439
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:15,560
Speaker 1: Now I don't know what to do. I quit. We'll

440
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:22,160
Speaker 1: take it from here. Now is the time. Maybe maybe

441
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 1: nine of us have to die. What if you run

442
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 1: that way and I run this way. Maybe we can

443
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:27,679
Speaker 1: meet at some other okay, or you can just kill me.

444
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 1: So so we're in a two seater, okay, so if

445
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:31,960
Speaker 1: we're gonna start a new life of Really, I'm really

446
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:33,760
Speaker 1: stick of, you know, being stuck in the middle of

447
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:37,520
Speaker 1: this stuff. You know, so I really was planning for

448
00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:41,000
Speaker 1: you to die right now? That feels like the natural right,

449
00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:43,440
Speaker 1: next thing, next right, You're right, you're right. What if

450
00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:48,280
Speaker 1: I just jump out of this movie vehicle? Sounds good? Okay,

451
00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 1: here I go. Oh someone pressed pause. Samm It, sam it,

452
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 1: oh samon. I love those kids, by the way, Oh

453
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 1: my god, somebody saved them. Thank you for not killing either.

454
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,840
Speaker 1: Seen three comes from Patron v I P. Mary Grays,

455
00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:18,000
Speaker 1: who wrote, take a moment to send thanks gratitude for

456
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 1: all the laughs, love the rotating guests You've been adding

457
00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:23,280
Speaker 1: in and excited to have Vanessa back as well. Tell

458
00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:26,800
Speaker 1: Caroline just get in the car and go oh yeah,

459
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 1: we gotta get an update from Caroline from the road.

460
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:31,520
Speaker 1: Driving across the country. I've driven across the country and

461
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:35,040
Speaker 1: back three times once solo, and it's worth it. Look

462
00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 1: up sight seeing stops and Okay, she's not here. So

463
00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:44,800
Speaker 1: Grace is a very nice person. Love Mary, Grace, Love

464
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 1: love love. I was Josh. If James is reading this,

465
00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:51,720
Speaker 1: stop now. James going to put a suggestion. I have

466
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 1: a horrible memory. So if this has been used before

467
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 1: or something similar, please disregard. I promised to keep this

468
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:03,920
Speaker 1: and short and simple, and here it is struck by lightning.

469
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:06,800
Speaker 1: Keep it ball you do, and stay safe and healthy.

470
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:13,480
Speaker 1: Mary Gray's loyal fans since episode one, love you all right, Now,

471
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 1: just hold that stick. I guess it's a rod. I

472
00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:18,680
Speaker 1: don't know what do I hold it above my head? Yeah,

473
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 1: just hold it above your head? How high? Up? As

474
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 1: high as you can just I should reach with the

475
00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:31,120
Speaker 1: pole thing? Yeah, rod or whatever it is. Yeah, let's

476
00:30:31,120 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: call it a rod. How high am I reaching? As

477
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 1: high as I can reach? Or how you way? No,

478
00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:41,240
Speaker 1: as high as you can reach? How's this? I mean

479
00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:44,960
Speaker 1: that's good. I mean that's that's honest. Are you trying

480
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:51,680
Speaker 1: to kill that guy? He's a If there's a storm,

481
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 1: it seems like you're trying to kill him. Nope, No,

482
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,000
Speaker 1: you're shouting at him to raise that rod up higher

483
00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 1: in the air. That's that's basically murder. How is it calling,

484
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:08,800
Speaker 1: I'm calling, I'm calling for help. No, you're not getting

485
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: phone back. Yeah, yeah, buddy, Yeah, that's a mail cliper.

486
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:21,640
Speaker 1: I just hold it up. Just keep holding it up. Listen, man,

487
00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:27,640
Speaker 1: if you tell that guy that, I'm gonna keep you. Hey, Hey,

488
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:35,840
Speaker 1: are you killing that man? No? No, I'm gih gosh,

489
00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 1: best of luck. You're a hero. Thanks, thanks, No, raise

490
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:46,000
Speaker 1: it up, don't drop it. Mom My arms getting tired.

491
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,560
Speaker 1: We'll just keep it up. God damn it. I don't

492
00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:54,160
Speaker 1: even think it's supposed to thunderstorm. Fuck you do? I do?

493
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 1: I have a smoke? Hey, what's up it stormy? Um? Yeah,

494
00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:01,120
Speaker 1: I'm back on casey. I'm just here to give up

495
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:06,080
Speaker 1: my real quick report. Um. So you know, I'm more

496
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 1: lightning leggings today. So I think there's gonna be some

497
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 1: latining maybe happening today. I don't know. It might be

498
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 1: a little fugging. I don't really know, but that's it.

499
00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:18,240
Speaker 1: That's my report. Uh do what you do. Keep driving through. Uh,

500
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:20,400
Speaker 1: maybe get on the train and maybe hang out in

501
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 1: the rain. I'm still working on my sign off. I'll

502
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 1: come with a new one next week. Guys, don't worry

503
00:32:24,560 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 1: about it. Fantastic Thanks guys. My followers really like that

504
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:31,680
Speaker 1: when I do it like that, you know, just like

505
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: off the cuff. You know, I take an impact class.

506
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,840
Speaker 1: So yeah, there it is shows. Uh. You know, I

507
00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 1: think the whole crew would back me on this. But

508
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 1: you know, every time you were a certain legging that

509
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,520
Speaker 1: is like you know, weather patter or whatever it happens.

510
00:32:44,040 --> 00:32:53,720
Speaker 1: So yea wow, wow, that's that is something. Um uh,

511
00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:55,800
Speaker 1: you know, I don't. I don't. I'll just go out

512
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 1: and say it. I've denounced my traditional faith practice and

513
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 1: I really would love to worship of you. So I

514
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: just think you're some kind of you're a guy. Is

515
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 1: there any where we can make requests on what we

516
00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 1: would like you to say? The weather's gonna be like, yeah, totally.

517
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 1: I mean you can go onto my innst story usually

518
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:17,440
Speaker 1: every Monday I put a pull up, or you can

519
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 1: you can do it on YouTube, or you can follow

520
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:21,000
Speaker 1: me on snaped out, or you can follow me on Twitter,

521
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: or you can follow me on Zoom. I'm sorry, Johnny Mountain.

522
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 1: Look you've served k CR twelve wonderfully dutifully for the

523
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:35,560
Speaker 1: last two decades. But how old is this kid? She

524
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 1: doesn't identify with age, so we don't really know. One

525
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 1: of those huh yeah, what you fly to a black hole? Yeah?

526
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:49,720
Speaker 1: I think so. Gosh, man, remember when you remember when

527
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,680
Speaker 1: you predicted that hell stone in seven? Yeah, it happened.

528
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:57,520
Speaker 1: That was that was something. Look, are we here to

529
00:33:57,600 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 1: reminisce over a great meteorological with sievements from the past? No, no, no,

530
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 1: are you gonna give me my fucking money? So that's

531
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:12,480
Speaker 1: that's just it. Um, I don't, I don't. I don't

532
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:15,279
Speaker 1: have it all right now. You know I deferred by

533
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 1: salary for twittery years, hoping to get hoping to get

534
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:24,640
Speaker 1: a lump sum. Look, we're we're, we're we're a public broadcast,

535
00:34:25,239 --> 00:34:33,360
Speaker 1: are Yeah, in case you're twelve twelve. Look, I always

536
00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 1: said the weather comes first. The weather comes first, and

537
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:41,560
Speaker 1: I'll get my money when it's good in time, yeah,

538
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:49,720
Speaker 1: Richard Richard, Well, well, well, chony mountain, do I back? Yeah? Look,

539
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:54,040
Speaker 1: I just I need a job. Okay, I'm not so

540
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 1: proud to beg Well, if you want this joke, you're

541
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:02,680
Speaker 1: gonna have to predict all interest the weather. All right.

542
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 1: Is this professional, by the way, or is this amateur? Amateur?

543
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:13,919
Speaker 1: Amateur amateur medeo. All right, Yeah, we go into communities

544
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 1: that don't have a local radio station on news network

545
00:35:17,719 --> 00:35:22,480
Speaker 1: or can't even receive it. Where is that a lot

546
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 1: of questions? Just one a lot of fire. I'll trust

547
00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:27,600
Speaker 1: you that you found some. I'll trust you that you

548
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 1: found some. Boston heard of it. Yeah, bust. So you're

549
00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:41,600
Speaker 1: saying they don't have local TV or radio or access

550
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:47,160
Speaker 1: to that is side. Now I need you to go

551
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:50,000
Speaker 1: into the city center and tell people that it's gonna

552
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:56,960
Speaker 1: storm in storm up all in there. Excuse me, certaty

553
00:35:56,960 --> 00:36:01,320
Speaker 1: of a moment, Get off of me. I gotta tell you.

554
00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:05,000
Speaker 1: I gotta tell you about the weather. Oh, ma'am. Could

555
00:36:05,040 --> 00:36:07,759
Speaker 1: I allright? Could have just a moment of your time?

556
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:11,520
Speaker 1: Touch me? All right? Sorry, I'm sorry. I came in

557
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:17,120
Speaker 1: hot there, sir, sir, Hey, yeah, you sir. And it's

558
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:22,040
Speaker 1: gonna stormy storm. It's gonna stormy storm. You're gonna get wet, Boston,

559
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,439
Speaker 1: You're gonna get rail wet. I'm not wearing any any

560
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:28,759
Speaker 1: clothes under this trench coat. You freak. You freak. I'm

561
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:30,480
Speaker 1: trying to talk to you about the weather. Get your

562
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:32,839
Speaker 1: hands up. Hey, give me ten bucks. Give me ted.

563
00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:35,319
Speaker 1: I just told you the weather. Give me ted bucks. Hey, hey,

564
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:39,680
Speaker 1: Johnny Mountain. Yeah you know me. Oh my god. Yeah,

565
00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 1: what are you doing in Boston? I just moved here

566
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:46,879
Speaker 1: and I watched your weather reports all through my childhood. Yeah.

567
00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 1: I'm out of the programe now just doing amateur amateur meteorology.

568
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 1: You need you need a personalized weather report? Yeah, sure,

569
00:36:56,280 --> 00:36:58,120
Speaker 1: yes please. Can I you mind if I record this

570
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:01,399
Speaker 1: on my phone while you're doing it? Sure? Okay? So

571
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:06,200
Speaker 1: where where do you live? Uh? And action? Okay, all right,

572
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:12,880
Speaker 1: where do you live? I live in uh Brookline? In Brookline? Okay,

573
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:16,359
Speaker 1: and uh so you're gonna be what time you head home?

574
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 1: About an hour? Okay, you're gonna head home in about

575
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:22,600
Speaker 1: an hour. Uh it's gonna be partly cloudy, uh with

576
00:37:22,719 --> 00:37:26,759
Speaker 1: a chance of hail. And uh it's gonna be h

577
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 1: eight degrees from uh fairmnightmity. The humanity is gonna be

578
00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:41,680
Speaker 1: n This is great. Who is this guy? You just

579
00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:44,279
Speaker 1: found him on the street? Yeah, yeah, yeah, this I'm

580
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:49,480
Speaker 1: telling you this from my hometown in San Fernando Valley.

581
00:37:50,000 --> 00:37:56,319
Speaker 1: So I grew up at this guy. I love it.

582
00:37:56,360 --> 00:37:59,240
Speaker 1: Look we don't have a news network or a radio station.

583
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 1: Let's on this. What kind of weather we got your

584
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:07,040
Speaker 1: way home? Literally on your way home. Give me ten bucks, Stormy,

585
00:38:07,080 --> 00:38:09,200
Speaker 1: thanks for coming into my office. Look you've been doing

586
00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:12,960
Speaker 1: you're doing great. Um. Do you remember that old guy

587
00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:16,680
Speaker 1: that used to work here, Johnny Mountain. Yeah, that weird guy,

588
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:19,239
Speaker 1: the mountain guy. Mountain range is gone. And I rang

589
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:22,320
Speaker 1: sort started interrupted sacrifice the goat that you asked me

590
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:24,759
Speaker 1: to do that too, and uh it is open and

591
00:38:24,840 --> 00:38:28,120
Speaker 1: flayed for you to uh storm on or you know,

592
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:32,160
Speaker 1: hale on or whatever. Have you seen the revenue? Go

593
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:35,480
Speaker 1: do that. That's your next step. You got it, Thank

594
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:39,520
Speaker 1: thank you, thank you. Um well, Johnny, we thought he

595
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:43,160
Speaker 1: was done for, but he's shooting right up through those

596
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 1: Nielsen ratings. It's unbelievable. People are watching him. He's calling

597
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,360
Speaker 1: him out there. I know, Stormy, I know they're calling

598
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:53,600
Speaker 1: him out there now and we need You don't know

599
00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:57,840
Speaker 1: who the fuck Nielsen is, but Nielsen clearly hasn't seen

600
00:38:57,880 --> 00:39:02,400
Speaker 1: my numbers. Okay, just Nielson have brand deals. Okay. I

601
00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:06,080
Speaker 1: don't know if the second thing about nails it Stormy.

602
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:07,680
Speaker 1: I don't want to put you down, but you're the

603
00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:10,560
Speaker 1: only brand deal you have is with Van Okay, And

604
00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:13,480
Speaker 1: I'm not disparaging that. It's cool that you have a

605
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:17,400
Speaker 1: generic vehicle, but I'm saying we need to compete. And

606
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,960
Speaker 1: Johnny Mountain, he's got a lot of viewers, a lot

607
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:28,080
Speaker 1: of followers, a lot of subscribers, a lot of you know, metrics. Yeah, Okay,

608
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:30,640
Speaker 1: I hear you. I hear you're putting down. Well what

609
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 1: can I Okay, Okay, you're coming at me hot, So

610
00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:37,200
Speaker 1: I need you to go range. Okay, I'll get out there.

611
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,160
Speaker 1: You want what do you want me to do out there?

612
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:41,839
Speaker 1: You want me to do more readings? Does that make

613
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:48,960
Speaker 1: you happy? Maybe I lived the man? No storm inappropriate?

614
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:53,920
Speaker 1: That is HI? Is this Bruce? Yes? This is Bruce.

615
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 1: No Bruce. This is Johnny Mountain with your personalized weather report. Ny.

616
00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:01,280
Speaker 1: It's so nice to hear from you again. Please continue. Okay,

617
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 1: how's the weather right now? Well, I'm gonna tell you

618
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:06,319
Speaker 1: it's a seventy eight degrees where that with a chance

619
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:09,240
Speaker 1: of snow. It's uh, there's gonna be a low fifty

620
00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 1: two deserts ninety six. Uh inland Empire, this fire. He's

621
00:40:15,719 --> 00:40:19,879
Speaker 1: given personalized, personalized weather reports. You need to do one better.

622
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:23,280
Speaker 1: You need to do better. You're live in five four three.

623
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 1: There is a hurricane and it is coming and it's

624
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:34,239
Speaker 1: going to go. Okay. I don't know when, and I

625
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:37,480
Speaker 1: don't know where, I don't know how, but it's gonna

626
00:40:37,560 --> 00:40:40,239
Speaker 1: make land and there's gonna be an eye. And I

627
00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 1: just I'm feeling so much pressure to give me where

628
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:48,160
Speaker 1: you want right now. I can't be a mountain. I mean,

629
00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:52,440
Speaker 1: mountains are naturally occurring up to think, they take time.

630
00:40:53,160 --> 00:40:56,839
Speaker 1: They take time to produce in the water and the

631
00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:06,000
Speaker 1: land to come together. And U out, um, Sarah, are

632
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:10,560
Speaker 1: you you're just looking for the longest, tallest metal rod.

633
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:16,279
Speaker 1: I mean we sell antenna's I I could. I haven't

634
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 1: thought a rod about a rod in a long time.

635
00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:23,280
Speaker 1: You look like maybe you've joined some sort of occult

636
00:41:23,320 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 1: Are you sure you're okay? Your eyes are kind of

637
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:32,240
Speaker 1: glazed over. Okay, hurricane hit land and it's gonna make land.

638
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:36,480
Speaker 1: Do you understand that make land? You don't understand. I

639
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,319
Speaker 1: just work at this circuit city. Okay, it's the last

640
00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,480
Speaker 1: of our kind. Yeah, let me tell you something that

641
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:46,680
Speaker 1: human fucking beans. Okay, storms every single day telling the

642
00:41:46,719 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 1: world exactly what they need to hear, and they don't

643
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:51,799
Speaker 1: want to Okay, okay. Uh And this just in we

644
00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:55,919
Speaker 1: have we have Stormy and Johnny Mountain on the same hill,

645
00:41:56,120 --> 00:41:59,360
Speaker 1: both holding rods up into the sky and they're screaming

646
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:03,000
Speaker 1: weather we simultaneously. We don't know what's gonna happen. I'm

647
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,239
Speaker 1: not a meteorologist. I'm just a news reporter and I'm

648
00:42:05,239 --> 00:42:09,280
Speaker 1: reporting what I see. This is Bobby McIntyre case R twelve.

649
00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:13,239
Speaker 1: Are you signing off? No, don't sign What are you doing?

650
00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 1: What you just told the crazy the leading wasn't still

651
00:42:18,239 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 1: cut to the life. What are you doing? We're killing

652
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:23,840
Speaker 1: the planet. We're killing the planet with fossil fuels everything.

653
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 1: We're gonna be in space suit, We're lunch in space

654
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:32,279
Speaker 1: and it's gonna be a space Please Sky, open up

655
00:42:32,280 --> 00:42:35,080
Speaker 1: and kill me, Open up and kill me. Why did

656
00:42:35,080 --> 00:42:41,480
Speaker 1: I defer my salary? Yeah, Hey, Johnny Mountain, come on

657
00:42:41,520 --> 00:42:44,320
Speaker 1: in and have a seat here. Listen. We're very excited

658
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:47,799
Speaker 1: about representing you back in the big, big leagues of

659
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 1: San Joaquin. And uh, I want to just say that

660
00:42:53,080 --> 00:42:56,640
Speaker 1: what that report you gave from the mountain top was

661
00:42:56,680 --> 00:42:58,839
Speaker 1: a little much for this neck of the woods. So

662
00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:02,160
Speaker 1: we're hoping you can dial it back from a twelve

663
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:07,120
Speaker 1: to about a solid five. And uh, I believe that

664
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:12,200
Speaker 1: you're starting salary of six dollars a week is uh

665
00:43:12,560 --> 00:43:15,480
Speaker 1: pretty respectable for this market. But I'd love to hear

666
00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:22,280
Speaker 1: from you. Okay, my name is Johnny Mountain. Please, um,

667
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:26,200
Speaker 1: I was struck a washed up Okay, he's washed up,

668
00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:32,600
Speaker 1: So he's washed up. Um, please be kind to me.

669
00:43:33,160 --> 00:43:35,680
Speaker 1: Oh God, I don't want he's like a fucking he's

670
00:43:35,680 --> 00:43:37,720
Speaker 1: like a zombie. Stop talking to me when this is happening.

671
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:39,920
Speaker 1: But hold the but but but why did Jim give

672
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:43,680
Speaker 1: him the note to dial it back down? Just come bored,

673
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 1: come with me to the bathroom for God said, excuse me,

674
00:43:47,320 --> 00:43:52,359
Speaker 1: excuse us. So Johnny, UM, I'll tell you what we're

675
00:43:52,360 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 1: gonna put you on tonight if you're ready to go,

676
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,399
Speaker 1: because I think you're ready to go. I'm ready to go. Whatever. Yep,

677
00:43:58,480 --> 00:44:06,479
Speaker 1: teleprompters loaded mint mint, No, No, no, I'm fine, thank you. Listen, listen, listen. Yeah,

678
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:09,400
Speaker 1: this guy is catatonic over there, right, he's like that. No,

679
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:12,160
Speaker 1: but have you heard about Stormy? Have you heard about

680
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:17,799
Speaker 1: com get Away? You don't know? Okay, I'm gonna stop

681
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:21,799
Speaker 1: it right there and uh, we're going to follow these

682
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:28,800
Speaker 1: executives into the bathroom for the next um. Is everybody

683
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:32,920
Speaker 1: cool with that? Or or would you like to see Johnny?

684
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:35,480
Speaker 1: Can we get a drone in there? I really am

685
00:44:35,520 --> 00:44:37,920
Speaker 1: liking those drone shots? Can we get a drone shot

686
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:41,240
Speaker 1: in the bathroom of the executives? Everything's already been shot,

687
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:43,319
Speaker 1: I mean we could What about one of those like

688
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:46,120
Speaker 1: bomb disposal robots? Can we get those? Because they're just

689
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:50,560
Speaker 1: like they got that like crane neck cut this scene

690
00:44:50,640 --> 00:44:56,279
Speaker 1: or not? Basically? What was that a camerangle from the

691
00:44:56,320 --> 00:45:02,120
Speaker 1: toilet water Zara? It's me, Yeah, so sad, I'm in

692
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:04,480
Speaker 1: the next stall. I'm still alive. I'm living in a

693
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:10,120
Speaker 1: different movie, sam it So if why won't you just perished?

694
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 1: I thought you'd be happy to see me. A relationship

695
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:19,680
Speaker 1: is strained, Yeah, it's straight for sure. Alright, fine, if

696
00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:21,880
Speaker 1: you just flush the toilet, I'll go down and you

697
00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:24,480
Speaker 1: want to see me? Ever again, I used there's Susie

698
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:27,600
Speaker 1: because he said that before. You said that before, and

699
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:29,960
Speaker 1: you didn't You didn't die what I thought you want

700
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 1: to die before, and you ended up in this new

701
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:34,240
Speaker 1: movie when I'm trying to start a new life. Okay,

702
00:45:34,440 --> 00:45:36,440
Speaker 1: but okay, I just want to say, I just want

703
00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:38,160
Speaker 1: to say, hold on before you flush. Doesn't seem like

704
00:45:38,160 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 1: you're a big part of this movie. It seems like

705
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:41,959
Speaker 1: those executives are doing a lot and you're just behind

706
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:52,680
Speaker 1: the stall. Flush hand down. No, no, is there another

707
00:45:52,719 --> 00:45:55,680
Speaker 1: guy here doing it? We just people. Have you seen

708
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:57,400
Speaker 1: the stormy? Have you seen a stormy? Stormies doing the

709
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 1: good stuff. She's doing great, she's doing great. So why

710
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:04,600
Speaker 1: do we get this this? This? This okay, freeze. I'm

711
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,200
Speaker 1: not sure how those kids got into this movie. They

712
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:11,400
Speaker 1: are from a completely different movie. Uh again, I'm definitely

713
00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:14,200
Speaker 1: leaning towards cutting these executives. But if if, if you

714
00:46:14,280 --> 00:46:18,479
Speaker 1: get if you wake up, I think that this Yeah,

715
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,520
Speaker 1: I don't think it's a cross promotion for both videos, right,

716
00:46:21,560 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 1: I don't think it to be cross promoted. W Are

717
00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:28,200
Speaker 1: you guys a professional test audience? Is there any other kind?

718
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 1: I was told they're conditioning in free soup. Okay, so

719
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:39,640
Speaker 1: definitely amateur. Definitely amateur, Yeah, I was, I was professional,

720
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 1: but I again amateur status do you have a camerangle

721
00:46:44,120 --> 00:46:46,240
Speaker 1: from the toilet water? Okay, we don't have a camera

722
00:46:46,239 --> 00:46:48,680
Speaker 1: angle from the toilet water. What about from the faucet

723
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:50,880
Speaker 1: so we can see the hands. I'd be happy with that.

724
00:46:51,560 --> 00:46:55,160
Speaker 1: I'd be good. Okay, everything. So do they love it?

725
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:57,719
Speaker 1: Do they love my movie? I mean even joined its

726
00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:00,239
Speaker 1: two groups all over all of the country. Just we

727
00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:01,759
Speaker 1: just need a couple more test groups and then we'll

728
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 1: see all right, lest I feel like I feel like

729
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:04,840
Speaker 1: I feel like I feel like we would know. I

730
00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 1: feel like we know right now. So far, the word

731
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:09,120
Speaker 1: is that most groups want to do a lot of

732
00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:11,480
Speaker 1: reshoots and they want to be a lot longer, and

733
00:47:11,520 --> 00:47:14,480
Speaker 1: then there's actually a good percentage. I want to see

734
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:19,440
Speaker 1: the executives, p and pooh, and who's running the session.

735
00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:24,960
Speaker 1: We got someone at from someone from Vans and doing it. So,

736
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:30,120
Speaker 1: oh god, thank you so much for coming to this session.

737
00:47:30,239 --> 00:47:32,279
Speaker 1: I mean, it's me Stormy d and I know I'm

738
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:34,879
Speaker 1: usually just doing the weather, but like it's just really really,

739
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:37,800
Speaker 1: I think these are these ideas are awesome and I

740
00:47:37,880 --> 00:47:45,000
Speaker 1: think they're gonna make the Moleeve better. Um, you're famous, Yeah,

741
00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:50,319
Speaker 1: it's what I do. She does fame that's sick. Dude,

742
00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 1: that's sick. Yeah, don't be nervous around me. Don't pee.

743
00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 1: Oh you did it? Okay, don't. I can't help it.

744
00:47:56,280 --> 00:48:04,680
Speaker 1: I can't help it. It's just me stormy d hotel. No, no, actually, yeah,

745
00:48:04,719 --> 00:48:10,759
Speaker 1: we'll take a towel. I did piss myself. Oh ship, Look,

746
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:13,160
Speaker 1: I just walked in in the next test room. I

747
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 1: can see the mirror. It's Johnny Mountain. You can see

748
00:48:17,239 --> 00:48:21,360
Speaker 1: the mirror. Hello, my name is Johnny Mountain. I have

749
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:25,280
Speaker 1: brain damage because I was struck by lightning. Johnny, just Johnny.

750
00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:27,640
Speaker 1: Just read through the teleprompter. There, just read. You're not

751
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:31,760
Speaker 1: to think anything. Don't speak your thoughts. Just just read

752
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:35,200
Speaker 1: what's in the telepronter. Welcome this test screening sponsored by Vans.

753
00:48:35,239 --> 00:48:38,520
Speaker 1: The vehicle was that his thoughts was for his thoughts.

754
00:48:39,520 --> 00:48:42,120
Speaker 1: Can I see to the mirror? Dude? I don't know,

755
00:48:42,760 --> 00:48:45,640
Speaker 1: said dude. I don't suck, you know, man, you tell me. Oh,

756
00:48:45,719 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 1: I pissed myself again. I kiss up, Thank you, Thank

757
00:48:51,480 --> 00:48:54,840
Speaker 1: you for the towel. Now this is a two way mirror,

758
00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:59,680
Speaker 1: meaning you can see both ways through it. Oh, thank god.

759
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:03,920
Speaker 1: You can't see through it, dude. You know I can't

760
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:08,520
Speaker 1: see it. If it looked at it, it's a window.

761
00:49:08,600 --> 00:49:13,200
Speaker 1: If I can see through it, it's a it reflects. Man,

762
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:20,480
Speaker 1: I can't seeking you. I'm missing myself. Man, suck Johnny.

763
00:49:20,560 --> 00:49:22,840
Speaker 1: Just give us yourself your sign off now if you wouldn't,

764
00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:25,879
Speaker 1: I'm Johnny and I haven't been paid in twenty years.

765
00:49:26,400 --> 00:49:34,359
Speaker 1: Thank you. That's our shop for today. Sho woo woo. Uh,

766
00:49:35,000 --> 00:49:38,360
Speaker 1: let's not all the alchemists in no particular order. Jiacklynn,

767
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:41,120
Speaker 1: thank you so much for coming back. Have it be here.

768
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:46,640
Speaker 1: You had a good time I did. Did anyone in

769
00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:49,920
Speaker 1: your family call you Jacqueline or just me? Um? My

770
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:53,680
Speaker 1: mom calls me Jacqueline. Really yeah, so my mom would

771
00:49:53,719 --> 00:49:56,800
Speaker 1: actually get very upset at me if ever, if anyone

772
00:49:56,880 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 1: called me Jackie. So, um, all my friends call me Jackie.

773
00:50:00,560 --> 00:50:02,640
Speaker 1: But I always wrote my name Jacqueline because it's like

774
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 1: it's your given name. So I try to try to

775
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:09,600
Speaker 1: keep it. Keep respect, you know, keep respect. You gave

776
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:14,319
Speaker 1: me the name, so I gotta keep it. Well. Thank

777
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 1: you very much for coming back. And uh Joey Greer, Yes, yeah,

778
00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:26,200
Speaker 1: thanks Craigh, so great to see you again. Please, uh

779
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:28,879
Speaker 1: let us know where folks can find any of your

780
00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:35,640
Speaker 1: shenanigans social Twitter is always convenient, or Orange Tucks improv

781
00:50:35,920 --> 00:50:39,480
Speaker 1: for shows with me and my wife Carla, Craigslist pea

782
00:50:39,560 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 1: cast is kind of defunct for right now, but but

783
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,080
Speaker 1: follow it so you know when we put out news stuff.

784
00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:48,279
Speaker 1: It's a great idea and all of our love to

785
00:50:48,440 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 1: Carla of course. Chris Alvarado, thank you very much. I

786
00:50:53,080 --> 00:50:55,239
Speaker 1: love you guys. Jackie, so happy to have you here.

787
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:57,719
Speaker 1: What what what's your your your I G? Or where

788
00:50:57,719 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 1: can people find you Jackie? Yeah, you can find find

789
00:51:00,239 --> 00:51:04,840
Speaker 1: me at my name at Jacqueline Underscore away on Instagram

790
00:51:04,920 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 1: and Twitter, j k l Y and underscore you w

791
00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:12,160
Speaker 1: e h. Thank you for that, you know, the rest

792
00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 1: of my time and love to Jessica. By the way,

793
00:51:15,360 --> 00:51:22,560
Speaker 1: thank you, James Heeney. Hi. Well go to the real

794
00:51:22,719 --> 00:51:28,239
Speaker 1: chain dot com right now, and I'm there. I'm doing

795
00:51:28,280 --> 00:51:30,520
Speaker 1: something called so Timber and I just came and put

796
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:34,240
Speaker 1: it last night, or it already exists because every idea

797
00:51:34,280 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 1: has been thought of, right but I'm going to be

798
00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:40,360
Speaker 1: putting all of my live events on my web page

799
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 1: that you can find. I just deleted everything from my

800
00:51:43,680 --> 00:51:46,640
Speaker 1: Google calendars because there's no more live bear supply shows

801
00:51:46,640 --> 00:51:48,759
Speaker 1: blah blah blah, but I'm gonna fill it with new

802
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:52,680
Speaker 1: live stream shows. Calendar will be there. Do you want

803
00:51:52,719 --> 00:51:55,440
Speaker 1: to lie down for the rest of this? Yes, that

804
00:51:55,560 --> 00:51:58,000
Speaker 1: was I'm out of breath tonight it won't be breadth.

805
00:51:58,040 --> 00:52:02,120
Speaker 1: Then let's stand your engineers and producer of the stars,

806
00:52:02,280 --> 00:52:06,879
Speaker 1: Mr Doug Bane, and the fine folks that I heard

807
00:52:06,920 --> 00:52:11,600
Speaker 1: mediamp bump bump. I'm your host, Kevin Pollack. Remind you

808
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:13,319
Speaker 1: to please be kind to each other. Wear a mask,

809
00:52:13,400 --> 00:52:16,040
Speaker 1: and you go outside and remember alchemy