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Speaker 1: What's Episolife service. I'm g G Maguire.

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Speaker 2: I'm Geordie George. Hi, everyone, it's Elaine.

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Speaker 3: Was sweet Listen, don't let it for you, baby, I

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Speaker 3: know it's not so sweet.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Why Stone cold Heart?

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Speaker 5: Stone Cold Heart is a title that I came up

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Speaker 5: with this year, actually earlier this year, and it came

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Speaker 5: after I was just going through so much in my life.

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Speaker 5: You know, I feel like being nice sometimes, especially in

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Speaker 5: the industry, there's like a very thin line between being

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Speaker 5: a people's person and like being a people pleaser, you know,

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Speaker 5: And I think it came from a place of no

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Speaker 5: longer just wanting to please people, and it does take

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Speaker 5: away from like a person like myself who's always like

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Speaker 5: you know, thinking with their hearts and like so giving.

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Speaker 5: Sometimes you gotta have a stone cold heart or no

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Speaker 5: heart and just you know, my over hearts. So it

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Speaker 5: was sort of like coming from that place of having

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Speaker 5: to sort of restrict myself because I love to love

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Speaker 5: so freely, but being in a place where sometimes I

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Speaker 5: feel like you have to love strategically and it's so

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Speaker 5: it's so odd to me, but I guess necessary, and

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Speaker 5: it's what I'm figuring out on the album and sort

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Speaker 5: of like trying.

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Speaker 1: To you gotta adspen.

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Speaker 2: I have to adjust, I have to adjust.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I can't necessarily think with my heart or put

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Speaker 5: people before me.

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Speaker 1: That sucks that you can't think, like move with your

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Speaker 1: heart because you can't trust everybody.

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Speaker 2: You can't.

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Speaker 6: Was there a specific situation that made you be like,

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Speaker 6: maybe I need to address things differently going forward.

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Speaker 5: I think so many, so many situations. I think the

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Speaker 5: last straw, which wasn't even a big deal, but I think,

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Speaker 5: you know, when it's like a snowball effect, the one

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Speaker 5: thing that gets you to like your breaking point is

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Speaker 5: not always like the most intense thing, but it's at

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Speaker 5: that time. So I think it's when I decided to

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Speaker 5: go independent, you know, and then you start to see

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Speaker 5: the back and forth, and then you start to see

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Speaker 5: a lot of things that you weren't exposed to before.

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Speaker 1: Oh I want to dig into this, Okay, So let's

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Speaker 1: talk about Ela for a second. You're from South Africa, Yes,

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Speaker 1: South Africa. And you started off as an independent artist, yes,

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Speaker 1: and then you signed to Columbia Columbia Records, right to

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Speaker 1: Columbia Records. But then you went back to being independent.

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Speaker 5: Yes, recently, about a year ago. I know that decision.

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Speaker 5: It was more of like a business decision for myself.

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Speaker 5: I think being a South African artist, we're at such

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Speaker 5: an interesting place in our lives and our careers and

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Speaker 5: just as a country. You know, we're breaking so many barriers.

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Speaker 5: We've got so much global attention and global lab tyler,

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Speaker 5: you know, like the girls, TEMs, all of them. The

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Speaker 5: girls are doing so amazing. So I think in the

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Speaker 5: same breath, there's also like a lot of figuring out

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Speaker 5: that's going on behind the scene from both parties, you know,

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Speaker 5: parties that are trying to cross over and people that

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Speaker 5: are trying to help, you know, connecting the dots. There's

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Speaker 5: still a lot of like maneuvering.

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Speaker 1: You did well before you sign though I do it

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Speaker 1: pretty lit already. Did you think that signing to a

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Speaker 1: major label was going to make things like, Okay, this

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Speaker 1: is about to be easier for me? We got like,

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Speaker 1: I don't.

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Speaker 5: I don't, Yes, I don't. I don't think I thought

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Speaker 5: it was going to be easier. I think it was

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Speaker 5: more so about the platform and the structure, the machine.

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Speaker 2: The machine.

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Speaker 1: I don't think you not have to do so much, even.

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Speaker 5: Not doing things independently. I don't know much of what

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Speaker 5: gets done on.

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Speaker 2: An international level. You know. I did what I could locally,

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Speaker 2: but internationally it's such a different boardgame.

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Speaker 1: You know, let's go kind of like go to that

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Speaker 1: next level.

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Speaker 2: So then we're exactly And then it was a pandemic.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and you signed during a pandemic.

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Speaker 2: I signed. I literally signed like via zoom.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, it was crazy. It was like the pandemic. And

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Speaker 5: I was a full law student at the time as well.

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Speaker 1: So did you read your own contract or did you

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Speaker 1: have a lawyer?

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Speaker 2: No, I had a lawyer. Did you figure this out,

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Speaker 2: I'll do it? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I

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Speaker 2: had I had a lawyer. There were a few lawyers.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, it was a really lengthy process. It was exciting,

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Speaker 5: and that happened, and then it was a pandemic. So

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Speaker 5: obviously I was stuck in South Africa for some time

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Speaker 5: and it was a scary time for everyone for the world,

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Speaker 5: so I had to stay put for some time. And

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Speaker 5: then I was quarantining in Mexico for some time.

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Speaker 2: I know.

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Speaker 4: It was the.

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Speaker 2: Craziest thing ever.

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Speaker 5: While living into I was not living quarantining.

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Speaker 2: That's crazy. It sounds like you guys were doing island living.

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Speaker 2: I was not. I was not on the island living.

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Speaker 2: It wasn't that I.

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Speaker 4: Had the time to quarantine.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, no, it wasn't that in Mexico because that was

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Speaker 5: the only way that I could get to the US

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Speaker 5: during the pandemic from South Africa. There had to be

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Speaker 5: a point where I stopped to quarantine.

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Speaker 4: So quarantine Mexico fourteen days.

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Speaker 2: It was longer than that.

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Speaker 5: I think it was thirty days, yes, because of yes,

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Speaker 5: But what was it like on the day to day, writing, praying,

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Speaker 5: speaking to my family on FaceTime?

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Speaker 2: I was by myself. It was really just connecting. And

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Speaker 2: I was young. I was like twenty twenty one. No,

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Speaker 2: in Mexico, I was scared. I don't want to meet anyone.

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Speaker 2: I just wondering, like to meet myself and I yeah, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: no no.

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Speaker 1: They didn't have anybody like appointed to help you.

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Speaker 2: It was the pandemic.

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Speaker 5: It was really like you were like at a resort

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Speaker 5: or yes, I was at a hotel. Yes, I was

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Speaker 5: out of hotel, everything everything, and when it is, I way.

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Speaker 1: Right, nobody while you were at the resort, like people.

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Speaker 5: Like love interest now oh sorry, I always thinking I'm

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Speaker 5: always thinking, Hell, you.

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Speaker 2: Didn't have a fling.

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Speaker 1: You didn't have a fling.

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Speaker 2: And I didn't a fling in Mexico.

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Speaker 5: No no, no, no, no no.

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Speaker 2: And that's what I was doing there.

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Speaker 5: You know. It was really a crazy time. And I

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Speaker 5: was there for I think the thirty days, and then

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Speaker 5: I moved to LA and I got there and it

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Speaker 5: was amazing. I got to make amazing music, music which

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Speaker 5: is on Stone. Some of it is on Stone Cold Heart,

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Speaker 5: some of it isn't. And I was finding myself early twenties,

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Speaker 5: and I think for the first I stayed in LA

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Speaker 5: for two years, and for the first nine months I

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Speaker 5: wasn't able to go home because of the pandemic. Store

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Speaker 5: there was still restrictions, the visa issues and everything, so

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Speaker 5: I was stuck.

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Speaker 2: For a minute, you know.

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Speaker 5: And during that time, I'm celebrating birthdays on FaceTime. I'm

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Speaker 5: celebrating Christmas on FaceTime, Easter.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 5: So there was like a shift in me in my

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Speaker 5: mental health. And I think that and just being so

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Speaker 5: young but being so passionate, you know, it's always like

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Speaker 5: a tug of war. And I think eventually, when the

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Speaker 5: music was done and it was time to sort of

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Speaker 5: figure out a way to put it out. I was

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Speaker 5: already sort of feeling like it's not the right structure.

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Speaker 2: For me personally, you know.

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Speaker 5: I felt like I needed maybe more people who understood me,

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Speaker 5: or who understood the sound, or just needed to try again,

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Speaker 5: you know. And yeah, that's when I just decided that

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Speaker 5: I was going to put out the album by myself.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, how was.

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Speaker 1: It to get off the label though? Because I would

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Speaker 1: think that they weren't going to be willing to just

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Speaker 1: be like, I don't know how this works, but to

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Speaker 1: be like, all right, good luck. Do you think, like,

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Speaker 1: how did you get out of it?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 2: My goodness?

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Speaker 5: It was not easy, but it wasn't impossible, which is

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Speaker 5: what I appreciate because I feel like there's so many

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Speaker 5: situations that I've seen have so many artists who get

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Speaker 5: in but can't necessarily get out of the deals, you know.

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Speaker 5: So I was lucky enough. It wasn't even like a

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Speaker 5: terrible dealer, was a licensing deal, so like from the bats,

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Speaker 5: I don't think it was that technical for me to

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Speaker 5: be able to get out, But there was like the

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Speaker 5: emotional side to it, you know, they always going to

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Speaker 5: try when I, you know, talk to you figure some

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Speaker 5: things out. But I think eventually we got to a

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Speaker 5: place where we mutually felt like, you know, my goals

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Speaker 5: and there's just for the time being, just not necessarily

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Speaker 5: on the same page for now, and that's okay. I

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Speaker 5: feel like, even where I'm at now, I'm not necessarily

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Speaker 5: saying I'm closed off to the idea of major labels.

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Speaker 5: I might be, you know, interested in revisiting the conversation

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Speaker 5: maybe in the near future, you know, finding a bit

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Speaker 5: of STI.

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Speaker 2: It was a time.

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Speaker 1: It was even signing during the pandemic zoom, then going

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Speaker 1: to America for thirty days, then moving to LA That's

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Speaker 1: a lot your first deal, you know, and so it

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Speaker 1: wasn't so easy to be able to promote, to link

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Speaker 1: up with other people. That's not easy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it wasn't easy.

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Speaker 5: And by the time, you know, I finally met the people,

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Speaker 5: because there's actual people at the label, you know that

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Speaker 5: you need to meet in real life, and you guys

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Speaker 5: need to find the flow. It was so many moving

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Speaker 5: pieces that we had to sort of put together, and yeah,

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Speaker 5: we tried, and we have beautiful music out of it.

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Speaker 5: And it wasn't all a terrible experience, not at all.

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Speaker 5: I learned so much and I've grown so much, and

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Speaker 5: the resources that I got out of it are still

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Speaker 5: till this day, life changing.

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Speaker 1: You'll be fine, we got Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, So I'm grateful. I'm so grateful for that experience,

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Speaker 5: and I feel like it set me up for every

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Speaker 5: other experience that I'm here to have.

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Speaker 1: Well, let's talk about personal experiences in that case. Yes,

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Speaker 1: because the way this album starts off was Brandy sample.

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Speaker 2: Oh I love Brandy.

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Speaker 1: That is the ultimate breakup song. I remember breaking up

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Speaker 1: with somebody was playing that song and being like, Dann,

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Speaker 1: I feel sad. Shit. So I gotta know for you,

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Speaker 1: what were you feeling like, because that's a real emotion.

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Speaker 7: Right there, long as lonely hearted, like what happened?

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Speaker 8: Right?

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Speaker 5: Oh my goodness, broken hearted as bit. It feels crazy

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Speaker 5: saying it out loud because it's so different when you're

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Speaker 5: writing about it and you're alone in the right.

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Speaker 1: Broken heart today, right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 5: And I since, Yeah, you know, I'm still sins even

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Speaker 5: when I'm angry. But I think at that time I

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Speaker 5: was really angry. During that time, I had just moved

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Speaker 5: from I'm over it now. If it was me like

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Speaker 5: two years ago, I'll be like, let's go now, I'll

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Speaker 5: do it location.

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Speaker 4: We love.

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Speaker 1: Yes.

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Speaker 2: I was moving to.

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Speaker 5: L A during the time, right and there was someone

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Speaker 5: that I was seeing at the time and we were

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Speaker 5: on and off, and by the time I was moving

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Speaker 5: to l A, I was just like, you know what,

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Speaker 5: I don't think this is gonna work.

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Speaker 2: Cool off of this.

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Speaker 5: So remember from me deciding that I'm moving to me

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Speaker 5: actually being able to physically get on the plane and

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Speaker 5: leave was so much of back and forth and trying

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Speaker 5: to find a new flight and canceling the flight because

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Speaker 5: of the pandemic. So I'd be like, I'm leaving next

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Speaker 5: week and then something comes up and then I can't leave.

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Speaker 5: So from the time that I had announced to the

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Speaker 5: people in my family and to the people that were

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Speaker 5: close to me versus the time that I actually left,

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Speaker 5: there's like a month in between that space. So as

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Speaker 5: we're doing this back and forth with me, you know,

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Speaker 5: adjusting to me moving, I decided that I'm going to

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Speaker 5: ace this person that had been in my life for

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Speaker 5: some time, but they were very toxic, you know, they

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Speaker 5: had mental health issues. So I was just like, I

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Speaker 5: can't deal with this on a long distance type thing,

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Speaker 5: you know. So I started to speak to someone else

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Speaker 5: and they were cool. I met them through a family friend.

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Speaker 5: And it wasn't even anything hectic that happened between us

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Speaker 5: or anything that was so monumental or life changing. It

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Speaker 5: was just the vulnerability at the time of me getting

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Speaker 5: to know someone and speaking to them. It was just

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Speaker 5: someone that I was talking to on some Oh my gosh,

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Speaker 5: I'm about to countries, you know, and I'm leaving behind

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Speaker 5: so many things, so many people.

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Speaker 2: And we were cool.

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Speaker 5: And then long story short, he ghosted me, right and

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Speaker 5: then it just felt like a double heartbreak, and I

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Speaker 5: was so.

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Speaker 2: Ghost what is raw? Like, what's going on?

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Speaker 5: Thin?

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Speaker 6: Men sometimes don't have the courage to just say, hey,

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Speaker 6: I'm not interested, or I'm not where you're at, or

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Speaker 6: you don't.

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Speaker 4: Know how to use their words.

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Speaker 5: But I was so offended and taken it back by

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Speaker 5: that because it wasn't even about what was going on

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Speaker 5: between us, but what I had mentioned to you at

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Speaker 5: the time, you know, I had told her I was like,

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Speaker 5: oh my gosh, I'm going through so much. I'm about

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Speaker 5: to leave my country. Like my mom's in essential worker,

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Speaker 5: she's a nurse, so it's so scary, you know, she's

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Speaker 5: in the hospitals every day, like I was in a vulnerable.

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Speaker 9: Place, you know, at least like me as a person

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Speaker 9: just respecting or like I was just in a vulnerable

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Speaker 9: place and that on top of everything else, and just

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Speaker 9: my degree was just like none of these niggas mean ship.

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Speaker 2: Like I just got on the plane.

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Speaker 5: Just like writing, and I was so upset. And that's

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Speaker 5: how it came up with that title.

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Speaker 1: It's nice toy, Yeah, the dear Diary.

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Speaker 2: That's what happened.

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Speaker 5: It is it's so like petty. But I realized how

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Speaker 5: that instant just like sort of snowball effect into so

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Speaker 5: many other things because just off the bad my discussions

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Speaker 5: with men were very.

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Speaker 2: Like what do you want? You know?

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Speaker 5: So yeah, like it was laiter down the line where

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Speaker 5: I started realizing where the breakdown was. And it was

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Speaker 5: just because of that one silly dude that meant nothing

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Speaker 5: that inconvenienced me at that time. But I felt that

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Speaker 5: because I was vulnerable at that time, you know.

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Speaker 1: Because sometimes when you're going through something it hurts so much.

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Speaker 2: It just hurts so much more.

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Speaker 5: It's like you were not even that deep, my nigger,

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Speaker 5: Like it was not even that deep, Like you were

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Speaker 5: not that great, you didn't change my life, but.

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Speaker 1: You could have been friends at least.

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Speaker 2: Thing that people don't understand don't have to be that way.

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Speaker 1: Before that, though, you said the person you were dealing

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Speaker 1: with have mental health issues. That's a difficult thing. I've

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Speaker 1: had people ask me, like, how do you handle that

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Speaker 1: if you're dating somebody they have met, because you also

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Speaker 1: don't want to abandon someone because you know, for a

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Speaker 1: certain like some things they cannot help, you know. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's like it is a sickness if it's a mental

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Speaker 1: health issue, but then you know at certain times it

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Speaker 1: affects you. It's like, what's the balance there of knowing, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I want to be supportive, but at the same time,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to endanger myself, right.

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Speaker 5: I think it was a very difficult thing for me

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Speaker 5: to figure out because it also borderline fold manipulative. You know,

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Speaker 5: most of the time, it's just like I don't really

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Speaker 5: have a say or a valid comment on your behavior

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Speaker 5: because it's always going to fall back onto the fact

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Speaker 5: that you're lacking this, or you're not one hundred percent okay,

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Speaker 5: or you're struggling with this. So it's just like, what

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Speaker 5: ground do I really have to call you out, and

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Speaker 5: what's the likeliness of you actually changing your behavior?

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Speaker 1: Right?

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Speaker 2: So I think he was weaponizing his month.

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Speaker 5: I feel like that was also me learning, you know,

325
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Speaker 5: how powerful and scenttitive mental health is, but just how

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Speaker 5: to maneuver around it is also really tricky, especially when

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Speaker 5: it's someone's you know, like personality, you know, like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I'm this and this and that because I'm suffering from this.

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Speaker 5: Oh I'm this and this and that because you know

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Speaker 5: I'm going through that.

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Speaker 1: But they basically diagnosed or just saying that.

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Speaker 2: I've never also feel like, yeah, are you a fortually.

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Speaker 1: Diagnosed we're the papers polar or is it they just

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Speaker 1: saying something's wrong?

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Speaker 5: And since I met them, they were just open about

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Speaker 5: you know, this is what. So I never really took

337
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Speaker 5: the time to ask, like, you know, I just would

338
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Speaker 5: never want to think twice or really make someone feel

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Speaker 5: like are you really though?

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Speaker 2: You know, are you really depressed?

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Speaker 6: So actually a conversation recently with an actress I forget

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Speaker 6: who it was, and she was saying she didn't even

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Speaker 6: realize she was technically in an abusive relationship because someone

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Speaker 6: kept weaponizing what they were going through. But it was

345
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Speaker 6: a manipulation tactic to make her feel and like control her.

346
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:04,400
Speaker 1: Some people are on medication, like they have to be

347
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Speaker 1: on medication correct in order.

348
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Speaker 4: To correct, you know.

349
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Speaker 2: And I never saw any medication. You know.

350
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Speaker 5: Maybe it was a private thing that they did, but

351
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Speaker 5: I never saw any medication, and I never asked. And

352
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,600
Speaker 5: perhaps now looking back, there's so many red flags that

353
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Speaker 5: I'm realizing that I should have asked. I should have

354
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,800
Speaker 5: you know, but you never know, especially if you've never

355
00:16:22,840 --> 00:16:26,520
Speaker 5: necessarily been in a relationship or been around anyone that

356
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:29,840
Speaker 5: is suffering from a mental health, whether it's valid or not.

357
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you got hooked up with a family friend,

358
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Speaker 1: you know, what's tired about hooking somebody up.

359
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Speaker 5: Then when he goes to and I know, and she

360
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,720
Speaker 5: wasn't even trying to hook me up. She was just,

361
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Speaker 5: you know, like, damn, girl, you're about to move you

362
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:46,080
Speaker 5: you know, let me talk to someone, you know, So

363
00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:48,720
Speaker 5: I don't blame her. She she it was cool, and

364
00:16:48,760 --> 00:16:50,360
Speaker 5: we were all friends at the time, so it was

365
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Speaker 5: harmless until it wasn't.

366
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Speaker 1: Sometimes it's hard to help people up because you'd be

367
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Speaker 1: like I like my friends to be like I'm like, yeah, girl, but.

368
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:07,640
Speaker 2: Go ahead I'm also not I'm also like a matchmaker. Yeah,

369
00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:07,960
Speaker 2: I don't.

370
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:09,399
Speaker 5: I don't like to take on that role. I'm not

371
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,840
Speaker 5: a matchmaker and I'm not a wingman because.

372
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Speaker 2: I'm scared. I don't want to be involved. I just

373
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:19,840
Speaker 2: want to Yeah, I don't want to be involved.

374
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:23,160
Speaker 1: But then after that, right now you're in La So

375
00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:25,439
Speaker 1: then how do you start dating after that? Because it

376
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:26,600
Speaker 1: feels like I don't.

377
00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:27,240
Speaker 2: I don't.

378
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:33,240
Speaker 5: I tried, but Los Palmis Avenue that's me trying. You know,

379
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:36,840
Speaker 5: I tried, but I don't know, like I don't know

380
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,480
Speaker 5: dating in America or maybe it's La. I only stayed

381
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:44,200
Speaker 5: in La is rough it's America. It's like so detached,

382
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:47,679
Speaker 5: you know. It's like I'm with you, but I'm not.

383
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,159
Speaker 1: Like, well, let's talk about Las Palmas Avenue. So that's

384
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:51,119
Speaker 1: a real story.

385
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:56,400
Speaker 2: That was Yeah, yes, yes, so Los Palmis Avenue.

386
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:00,399
Speaker 5: I was and I'll keep saying talking because none of

387
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:03,359
Speaker 5: me and these people were in a relationship. Got to

388
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:05,240
Speaker 5: a stage where it was actually like, oh, we're in

389
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Speaker 5: a relationship.

390
00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:07,040
Speaker 2: So me and this.

391
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,720
Speaker 5: Person we were really cool, you know, And I stayed

392
00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:13,800
Speaker 5: on Los Palmis Avenue in La So I guess that

393
00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:16,960
Speaker 5: should have been the first red flag because we only

394
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:20,200
Speaker 5: ever really spent time at.

395
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:24,800
Speaker 2: Las Palmas at your place right right.

396
00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:27,879
Speaker 5: And if we were not at Los Palmas, we were outside.

397
00:18:28,560 --> 00:18:30,880
Speaker 1: You know, you never so you never went to his.

398
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:32,919
Speaker 2: Place, no me.

399
00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:37,120
Speaker 5: We met outside like at an event, at a private event. Yeah,

400
00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 5: we met at a private event in La.

401
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:39,439
Speaker 2: It was cool.

402
00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:41,199
Speaker 5: But we had known of each other already. We had

403
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:44,280
Speaker 5: been following each other right for some time, right, So

404
00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:45,000
Speaker 5: it was like, oh, it's.

405
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,359
Speaker 2: Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Oh you

406
00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:51,000
Speaker 2: stay in La now? Oh nice? Where about Palmis Avenue? Cool?

407
00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:52,040
Speaker 1: You know?

408
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:56,480
Speaker 5: And at first, because you know, La is like so active,

409
00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,879
Speaker 5: there's always something happening, it would just be I would

410
00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:03,960
Speaker 5: so happened to see him outside, and every time I

411
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,520
Speaker 5: see him outside, we so happened to hang out, you know.

412
00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:08,119
Speaker 5: So it wasn't a way you ad what are you

413
00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:10,680
Speaker 5: doing NEXTNK. It was just a I'll bump into you

414
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,439
Speaker 5: and then it's cash we hang out. And so this

415
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,640
Speaker 5: started happening for like the next three months, the first

416
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:18,719
Speaker 5: couple of months as I arrived in La. And then

417
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:20,640
Speaker 5: eventually he was just like, oh, do you want to go?

418
00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,720
Speaker 5: Do you want to go hang out? Is it Lucky

419
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:26,160
Speaker 5: the place where you go bowling, Yes.

420
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,239
Speaker 2: Lucky Strike, So that was our spots. So we went

421
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:28,960
Speaker 2: to Lucky Strike.

422
00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:33,560
Speaker 5: That was like five vibes and everything, cute cue, and

423
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:35,960
Speaker 5: so we started spending time at Las Palmers, you know,

424
00:19:36,119 --> 00:19:38,760
Speaker 5: started to you know, get to know each other. And

425
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:41,800
Speaker 5: off the bat, he wasn't a very open person and

426
00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:44,560
Speaker 5: I wasn't either. Obviously broken hearted as bitch.

427
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,159
Speaker 2: You know, not really into it.

428
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:53,960
Speaker 5: So it's not giving open right until randomly I get

429
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,840
Speaker 5: like screenshots from an account and it's in my requests, right,

430
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:01,199
Speaker 5: and yeah, and I DM right and it's in my

431
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,040
Speaker 5: request so I don't really see the damn.

432
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:04,800
Speaker 2: So it's been there for like a week or so.

433
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:08,399
Speaker 5: At this point I go in and it's a screenshot

434
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:11,440
Speaker 5: of and his numbers not safe, so I can see

435
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:14,080
Speaker 5: the full number on I message, right, So I first

436
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:15,480
Speaker 5: go back and check if I have the number saved.

437
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:17,000
Speaker 5: I have the number saved. Then I see whose number

438
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,480
Speaker 5: it is. Off the beats, I already know what's going on.

439
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:20,160
Speaker 2: So it's a conversation.

440
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:23,879
Speaker 5: Between him and another girl and her talking about what

441
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,320
Speaker 5: time am I meeting you?

442
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:29,280
Speaker 2: Oh, it was so nice to see you. I love

443
00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:31,600
Speaker 2: spending weekends with you, you know, bring.

444
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 5: In mind that weekend he had told me he was

445
00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 5: supposed to be at a work ding, you know whatever.

446
00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:38,440
Speaker 5: So she just sends me those screenshots and I'm like, okay, cool,

447
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,240
Speaker 5: you know it was it was such a petty thing.

448
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,840
Speaker 2: You know, but I was just like, well.

449
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:50,600
Speaker 5: You know, yeah, generally, what am I supposed to do

450
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:53,639
Speaker 5: about this? She didn't, she didn't say anything. She just

451
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:55,680
Speaker 5: sent the screenshots. She didn't say a word.

452
00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:57,440
Speaker 1: Was it from a secret account or was it from

453
00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,320
Speaker 1: the person's real account?

454
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,960
Speaker 2: Yeah? The chest, Yeah, with the chest.

455
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,080
Speaker 5: Which is what made it so much more easier because

456
00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:08,040
Speaker 5: when I confronted him, I was just like, hey, and

457
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:10,440
Speaker 5: I said her name, I said so and so and so,

458
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 5: you know, let me know that you guys had a

459
00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:16,960
Speaker 5: really great time this weekend at your work ding. So

460
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:20,240
Speaker 5: I'm just gonna yeah, and then I'm just like I'm

461
00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:22,560
Speaker 5: just gonna fall back, you know, you guys do your day.

462
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:25,679
Speaker 2: And he was shook.

463
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:30,000
Speaker 5: He was shook, And I think that's what made the

464
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,359
Speaker 5: whole thing so dramatic, was just because he was so shocking.

465
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:33,719
Speaker 5: He tried to guess like me, he was like, why

466
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,560
Speaker 5: are you in my business? And I'm like, I literally,

467
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:43,359
Speaker 5: it's just it's just like yeah, and it was just

468
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,639
Speaker 5: it was very toxic on both it and actually because

469
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:49,119
Speaker 5: she was also just like very much like you know

470
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,960
Speaker 5: what you're doing. It's not even that deep. I didn't

471
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:57,199
Speaker 5: know about you. You clearly knew about me. No, but

472
00:21:57,280 --> 00:22:00,440
Speaker 5: she did have like a cute little following like she's

473
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:08,360
Speaker 5: lucky strieling. He just decided to just you know, remove

474
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:10,840
Speaker 5: myself because for you to dal me with your chest

475
00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:15,040
Speaker 5: and send me screenshots is already so messy. And it's

476
00:22:15,119 --> 00:22:17,520
Speaker 5: not even like you were fighting for him. It's just

477
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:19,760
Speaker 5: like you were letting me know that you were spending

478
00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:21,160
Speaker 5: time with him, so it's not like.

479
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:25,760
Speaker 2: Trying to let me know.

480
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, technically he wasn't in a

481
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:29,960
Speaker 1: relationship without one of you.

482
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:31,400
Speaker 2: He wasn't. So that's why I said, say, let's that's

483
00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:35,639
Speaker 2: what the song says, my man, you know is ours.

484
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:39,000
Speaker 1: Doesn't feel competitive sometimes like for us as women, you

485
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:41,720
Speaker 1: know how sometimes you're with somebody like kind of and

486
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:43,439
Speaker 1: then he's dating someone else and then you feel like

487
00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:45,800
Speaker 1: well if I I mean, I don't know, because I

488
00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,840
Speaker 1: think sometimes that does happen where you're like, oh, I'm

489
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,320
Speaker 1: gonna let him do this and then he's to be

490
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:53,720
Speaker 1: with her and now no, no, I.

491
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:54,240
Speaker 2: Can't do that.

492
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:57,399
Speaker 5: I can't do any casual anything. I can't do I

493
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:01,359
Speaker 5: can't do it. Like, if we're not exclusive, it is it? Yeah, no,

494
00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:02,200
Speaker 5: then we're not doing it.

495
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,560
Speaker 1: What if he would have just been honest and been like, look,

496
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:07,280
Speaker 1: you know what, I wasn't with either one of you

497
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:10,639
Speaker 1: and I was still his reactions yeah like you if

498
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,840
Speaker 1: he would have just been honest and I apologized, you know,

499
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:16,080
Speaker 1: that was very messy. What if he would have did that.

500
00:23:16,119 --> 00:23:17,159
Speaker 2: I would have appreciated.

501
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:17,359
Speaker 5: You.

502
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 2: See.

503
00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:19,280
Speaker 5: The thing with me is like, let's just be honest

504
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,240
Speaker 5: from jump. Let me know that this is not going

505
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 5: to go anywhere. You know, we're just vibing or I'm

506
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:25,280
Speaker 5: trying to see other people whatever.

507
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 2: Then I can.

508
00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:29,880
Speaker 5: Decide for myself. But if we're spending time together and

509
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:32,399
Speaker 5: you know you're my girl, you're my girl, you know

510
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 5: you're my girls, but he's never asked me out.

511
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,399
Speaker 2: So until you ask me out, I'm not your girl,

512
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:41,440
Speaker 2: you know. Like for me, it's just like yeah, call

513
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 2: you that, I'm just like.

514
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:50,119
Speaker 1: Okay, like, oh you're not my girl. I'm just like

515
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:54,440
Speaker 1: it's so scared a bit you'd be like, oh, this

516
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:55,160
Speaker 1: is my man.

517
00:23:59,240 --> 00:23:59,480
Speaker 3: Talk.

518
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, So I don't know, had you just been honest

519
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 5: and just not so slimy? I feel like it was

520
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:05,640
Speaker 5: just so slimy.

521
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:09,560
Speaker 1: And so does somebody cut everybody else off? Because you

522
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:11,640
Speaker 1: were talking to him? So that means that you cut

523
00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 1: everybody else off? Because I also think sometimes we're at

524
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:18,320
Speaker 1: a disadvantage when we start dating somebody. It's not official,

525
00:24:18,359 --> 00:24:19,920
Speaker 1: but we're not talking to anybody else.

526
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:21,080
Speaker 2: That's how we lose.

527
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,600
Speaker 5: Is that how we lose low key, like in the

528
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:25,960
Speaker 5: talking stage and we're talking to one person only.

529
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:29,879
Speaker 7: Yes, because you just cut everything else off and then

530
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,320
Speaker 7: it doesn't work out, and then you got to try

531
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:33,840
Speaker 7: to either find somebody new where we build connections. And

532
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:36,360
Speaker 7: it's just like what people fail to realize is when

533
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,240
Speaker 7: you meet somebody, there's always somebody else before you, like.

534
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:45,400
Speaker 4: Nobody in their lives.

535
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:49,200
Speaker 7: There's always somebody in said person's life in some type

536
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,720
Speaker 7: of capacity, whether it's a sexual relationship or just talking

537
00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:56,400
Speaker 7: readership or going out to coffee relationship. You have somebody

538
00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 7: that's on your phone in some type of way. And

539
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:01,160
Speaker 7: when you meet some elsa and you like that person,

540
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:03,280
Speaker 7: you gravitate more towards them and put your energy there

541
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:05,840
Speaker 7: and either you let it fade or you say, hey,

542
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,120
Speaker 7: I'm in a relationship. Now I'm gonna fall back. But

543
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,119
Speaker 7: that's what we do as women. These men they just

544
00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:13,359
Speaker 7: want us all. They think they're gonna juggle us all.

545
00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 1: Just like in that period you're getting to know someone

546
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:20,679
Speaker 1: else that you're gravitating to. It are you supposed to

547
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:21,760
Speaker 1: cut everybody else up?

548
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 6: And when it's official, think you have a ninety like

549
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:29,879
Speaker 6: I think it's three month, ninety day grace period to

550
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:31,120
Speaker 6: let the hose fall off.

551
00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 2: I think we all have those people that.

552
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,600
Speaker 6: Because they spend the block every time. So it's like

553
00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:40,879
Speaker 6: even if you aren't even talking, like let's say this

554
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,000
Speaker 6: man that goes to me, right, he's gonna come back

555
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:47,359
Speaker 6: January fifteenth, he'll be back like my taxes, right, and

556
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:49,439
Speaker 6: so I'm going to be like, Okay, now I have

557
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 6: to say something, whereas before I wouldn't say anything if

558
00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:54,919
Speaker 6: I met somebody tomorrow because we are even speaking, But

559
00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:56,840
Speaker 6: he's gonna come back, so I'm gonna have to say something.

560
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,040
Speaker 6: Then that's a ninety day grace period.

561
00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:00,000
Speaker 1: Grace period.

562
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:06,439
Speaker 6: Pakay, Now I have the time to say something, but

563
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:08,760
Speaker 6: I'm not necessarily going to go out of my way

564
00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:10,040
Speaker 6: to say do you.

565
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 1: Think you could love two people at this? Like absolutely? Yeah?

566
00:26:13,359 --> 00:26:15,440
Speaker 2: In this I don't know. I don't think I can.

567
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:18,439
Speaker 4: Fas difference between loving and being in.

568
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 6: No, I've definitely had life friends at the same time,

569
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:27,600
Speaker 6: and I didn't know what to do, like truly, they

570
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:30,520
Speaker 6: do it to us, but like that's me, like actually,

571
00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:32,280
Speaker 6: and I felt bad, but I didn't know.

572
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:32,680
Speaker 4: What to do.

573
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:33,400
Speaker 2: I felt bad.

574
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:36,760
Speaker 4: I didn't feel bad though I felt bad.

575
00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:40,120
Speaker 1: And they found out, but all they did they did

576
00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:41,760
Speaker 1: so then did they both forget?

577
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 5: They know?

578
00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 6: We went on on and on for then another two

579
00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 6: years with both of them.

580
00:26:48,119 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 1: Did they ask you questions? I feel like guys like

581
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:55,400
Speaker 1: I did, like, yeah, I'm glad trash.

582
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:58,359
Speaker 2: Once and then they didn't catch you again.

583
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:01,360
Speaker 6: So they caught me in the SLI like, Okay, well

584
00:27:01,400 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 6: I'm single. I'm not dating either one of you right now.

585
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 6: But they were both my ex boyfriends separately, okay, like

586
00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 6: at one point and then I broke up with one

587
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:10,960
Speaker 6: and then I'd be with the other, and there was

588
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:13,399
Speaker 6: like that lull period where it was like I was

589
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:17,920
Speaker 6: switching and then one found him in my phone damn.

590
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:26,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, and it was legal. Yeah.

591
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:26,800
Speaker 1: I don't know if.

592
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:34,640
Speaker 8: My past, my past from my Instagram to that one

593
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:39,400
Speaker 8: really got me in trouble Instagram. Yeah, and my homegirl

594
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,200
Speaker 8: was doing the same thing and they were friends.

595
00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:42,159
Speaker 2: Oh it was a mess.

596
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, damn TV show.

597
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:47,359
Speaker 6: But now that was a long time ago.

598
00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 1: It was more than the other.

599
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:54,720
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, so surely he wins easy.

600
00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:57,399
Speaker 1: I think you know what it was.

601
00:27:57,480 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 6: I think it was actually trauma because he knew my

602
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:05,840
Speaker 6: mom before she passed, and she was he was there.

603
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 2: Through all that.

604
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:09,199
Speaker 6: So well, they both kind of were, but I was

605
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,639
Speaker 6: with one and so I felt like, oh, but he

606
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:13,880
Speaker 6: knew my mom, Like I always felt like I gave

607
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:17,040
Speaker 6: him a pass for that. I shouldn't have done that

608
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:19,159
Speaker 6: because he was the trash here one.

609
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:21,840
Speaker 1: But but that was the one. Sometimes we gravitate to

610
00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:22,800
Speaker 1: the trash here one.

611
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:27,920
Speaker 2: The trauma bond. Yeah, exactly exactly. I feel that.

612
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 1: Well, what about the song Waiting on You. Let's talk

613
00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:30,639
Speaker 1: about that.

614
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:32,960
Speaker 5: I love waiting on You. Waiting on You is like

615
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:39,400
Speaker 5: the sweetest, most purest innocent song on the album. I'm

616
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:41,120
Speaker 5: not cussing anyone out.

617
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 2: You're being very I'm being very sweet.

618
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 1: That's some things going on.

619
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:46,719
Speaker 2: You know.

620
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:50,680
Speaker 5: You know, it was still very sweet and very love

621
00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:52,760
Speaker 5: a girl, but it was coming from like a more

622
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:57,719
Speaker 5: personal perspective. I think it was more so the feeling

623
00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 5: of constantly waiting on everything, you know, waiting for your turn,

624
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:03,360
Speaker 5: waiting for the right love, waiting for the right relationship.

625
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:05,680
Speaker 5: But at the time, I was in the label waiting

626
00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 5: for them to give me a date for my song

627
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:09,960
Speaker 5: to drop, just waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, and it's just

628
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:13,720
Speaker 5: like finding inspiration in the waiting.

629
00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:15,360
Speaker 2: Period, it's like really difficult.

630
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,480
Speaker 5: So I spent a lot of my time making music

631
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 5: and I made that song during that period, so it's special.

632
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:22,360
Speaker 4: It is.

633
00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:23,240
Speaker 1: It's a sweet song.

634
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 2: Sweet's perspective, it's a different perspective, feel like, you know,

635
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:29,160
Speaker 2: maybe I'm not so stone.

636
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:31,400
Speaker 1: Cold, although maybe you don't want to be.

637
00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 2: I don't want to be. I don't want to be.

638
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,120
Speaker 1: I don't want to be. And I think that's how

639
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: I feel like women get that way because of our experiences.

640
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 1: It's like we don't want to be that way, and

641
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:42,719
Speaker 1: when you trying to ignite that, you can feel like

642
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,520
Speaker 1: I don't have to be that way with then get better.

643
00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:50,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree, I agree. I like the song Relapse.

644
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:51,680
Speaker 2: You like Relapses?

645
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:59,360
Speaker 6: It Why I like it, it's because you acknowledge the

646
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 6: friends aspect of it, which I feel like a lot

647
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 6: of women ignore. When you're like I forgive you, but

648
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:07,600
Speaker 6: are my homegirls gonna forgive you? And like, what am

649
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:08,400
Speaker 6: I gonna tell that?

650
00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 1: That's when you bring up with someone you cannot tell everybody.

651
00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:14,080
Speaker 1: Nobody can because when you get back together, none of

652
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:14,720
Speaker 1: your friends gone.

653
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:16,760
Speaker 4: Exactly, you're not gonna let it go.

654
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's so real, I know. And I was

655
00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 2: that person.

656
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 5: I lost all my friends actually sadly. Yeah, so that

657
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 5: was a song from back day when I had friends.

658
00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 1: But you lost your friends because.

659
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 5: No, I don't know, I think I just you know,

660
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 5: we just lose your friends. I don't know if it's

661
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:35,560
Speaker 5: after I became famous things changed, and not necessarily because

662
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 5: I switched up, but naturally I am going to change. Yeah,

663
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:45,160
Speaker 5: it's not even like I did anything wrong, you know.

664
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:48,120
Speaker 5: I think about it quite often of the breakdown of

665
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:51,280
Speaker 5: friendships when you get to a certain place. Maybe it's

666
00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:53,320
Speaker 5: just the fact that there was very little that we

667
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:58,320
Speaker 5: could connect on. Maybe our priorities changed, but Yeah, it

668
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,960
Speaker 5: was really painful, especially when I was putting the album together. Usually,

669
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:03,160
Speaker 5: you know, i'd have like my homegirls, like, girls, what

670
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,920
Speaker 5: do you think? But this part of my life, this

671
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,520
Speaker 5: album was like a very lonely time for me. So

672
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,200
Speaker 5: even in relapsing, I remember when I wrote the song

673
00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 5: it was about the person that I was telling you

674
00:31:14,120 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 5: guys earlier about that was struggling with his mental health

675
00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 5: and we'd be on and off and he'd always just

676
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:22,920
Speaker 5: to get me back. There'd be a bigger trick than

677
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:26,240
Speaker 5: the last, which involved his mental health, you know. And

678
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 5: every time he would do this, I'd tell my homegirls

679
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 5: like he's doing this again, like he's just he's doing

680
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:33,600
Speaker 5: this again, and they'd be like, this is not good,

681
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 5: this is not healthy. You know, you gotta cut it off,

682
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,080
Speaker 5: and then cut it off, and then he'd do something else,

683
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 5: and then I'd have to tell them that, you know,

684
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:41,120
Speaker 5: and it was just terrible because I ended up, you know,

685
00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:43,160
Speaker 5: distancing myself from them because I didn't want to let

686
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 5: them down every time you know that I was relapsing,

687
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:50,720
Speaker 5: you know, and then I just started not telling them

688
00:31:50,840 --> 00:31:52,840
Speaker 5: about what was going on. And it sucks not being

689
00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 5: able to tell your homegirls just because you feel like

690
00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 5: they're going to shout at you, but you know they're

691
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:57,680
Speaker 5: gonna shout at because they're coming from a good place.

692
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,720
Speaker 1: And then you ended up isolating yourself, and.

693
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 5: Then you isolate yourself, and then it's even more terrible

694
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 5: because it's not like your nigga's acting right, you know,

695
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:09,040
Speaker 5: and you're icing your friends, so you're just hurting yourself.

696
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:10,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're just hurting yourself.

697
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: So yeah, and then asking that you just never got

698
00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:14,760
Speaker 1: down to your friends, right.

699
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,320
Speaker 5: It wasn't even after that. Me and my friends were

700
00:32:17,360 --> 00:32:20,920
Speaker 5: straight for years after that incident happened. It was totally

701
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:23,520
Speaker 5: related to other things. I think the more we started

702
00:32:23,560 --> 00:32:28,920
Speaker 5: to grow into ourselves, maybe just being the first famous

703
00:32:28,960 --> 00:32:31,400
Speaker 5: person in your friendship group is a shock to your

704
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 5: friendship group, and maybe it is difficult to adjust. And

705
00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:38,400
Speaker 5: I mean, I was away in another country for two years,

706
00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:42,440
Speaker 5: so there's only so many face times that can really

707
00:32:42,480 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 5: make up for me missing birthdays and me missing graduations.

708
00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 5: But I don't know, It's like every time we were together,

709
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:54,600
Speaker 5: I was either making the plans or we weren't really linking,

710
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:58,920
Speaker 5: you know, or I was texting or I wasn't really

711
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:01,680
Speaker 5: hearing from them. And then the last straw was when

712
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 5: it was my birthday and I didn't get a personal message,

713
00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 5: but I got like an Instagram post and I was

714
00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:13,280
Speaker 5: going back and forth like is it is it worth it?

715
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,040
Speaker 5: Like is it that deep? But I'm like, damn, I've

716
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:17,560
Speaker 5: known you for like more than ten years. A personal

717
00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 5: message would.

718
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,840
Speaker 2: Have hit hit different.

719
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 4: You know, the whole country coming with you.

720
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 2: Babe, like FaceTime me a text.

721
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:28,760
Speaker 5: But I also understand that you know she was going

722
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,240
Speaker 5: through whatever she was going through at the time, so

723
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:31,800
Speaker 5: I can respect that. But if you can take the

724
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 5: two minutes to post me, could have kind of taken

725
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 5: to it just low key even anything. So it just

726
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,000
Speaker 5: started to feel more and more detached, you know, just

727
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:44,080
Speaker 5: the little patterns of like you can't call me, but

728
00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 5: you can post me. It's just like the little things,

729
00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:48,800
Speaker 5: and it was just like I also, I'm not a

730
00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:51,440
Speaker 5: person that likes to address things, so I never there

731
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:54,239
Speaker 5: wasn't an actual fall out. I didn't address anything. I

732
00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:56,280
Speaker 5: just I just fell back.

733
00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:59,280
Speaker 1: When you go home, do you call like or just no?

734
00:33:59,520 --> 00:33:59,960
Speaker 1: That's it.

735
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 2: My family and my brothers, yeah, me and my brother's

736
00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:03,720
Speaker 2: already tired.

737
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,120
Speaker 1: It's not something that can't be at some point, you know,

738
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 1: Selvash like, maybe it's just.

739
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:10,240
Speaker 2: They don't say anything after my album dropped.

740
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:13,080
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's.

741
00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 2: New friends like friends.

742
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:19,319
Speaker 4: That hurts, new friends that hurts.

743
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:20,279
Speaker 1: That's just hurt And.

744
00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, I mean I didn't lose. Yeah, I

745
00:34:25,239 --> 00:34:27,680
Speaker 2: lost quite a lot of them. I still have.

746
00:34:28,040 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 5: It is disappointing, but I've also learned to hold myself

747
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:37,120
Speaker 5: accountable and let everyone else hopefully hold themselves accountable. I'm

748
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:39,160
Speaker 5: not bashing anyone, I get it.

749
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:41,080
Speaker 1: I'm not saying I'm just saying it's probably hurtful. Though

750
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:41,640
Speaker 1: it does hurt.

751
00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:45,200
Speaker 2: It hurts like we're friends for years, but it happens.

752
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:45,480
Speaker 2: You know.

753
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 1: I was thinking about this book.

754
00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 4: Hold on.

755
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:48,800
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you the name of it, because I

756
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,600
Speaker 1: think this is interesting. Her name is mel Rap and

757
00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 1: she's like a motivational speaker. But she has a book.

758
00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:56,319
Speaker 1: Is it's called the let them Theory, right, and it's

759
00:34:56,360 --> 00:34:58,319
Speaker 1: just to let other people make their choices and live

760
00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:01,560
Speaker 1: their lives and start making your job or responsibility to

761
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:03,440
Speaker 1: manage or control what other people are doing.

762
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 2: I love that, I said.

763
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 1: By using this theory, she said, I've never felt so.

764
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:10,279
Speaker 5: Free I love that. That's where I'm at. Yeah, I'm

765
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:12,120
Speaker 5: just letting people do what they want to do. I

766
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,440
Speaker 5: feel like I'm also the person that's always in people's ears,

767
00:35:16,520 --> 00:35:18,360
Speaker 5: you know, like don't do that, don't do this, you know,

768
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:20,360
Speaker 5: be straight, be this. So I'm tired of being in

769
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 5: your ear. Like you act however you want to act,

770
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:24,799
Speaker 5: And I'm going to add how I act. You know,

771
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 5: everybody's grown and everything, so just keep the same energy.

772
00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:32,520
Speaker 1: Really well, You've had a lot of accomplishments and music wise,

773
00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:36,440
Speaker 1: thank you. That has to feel good being like the

774
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:41,319
Speaker 1: most stream South African women artists on Spotify. Yes, you

775
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 1: know that was a huge feat when you did that,

776
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:46,960
Speaker 1: and putting out your album, going your EP going platinum,

777
00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:49,080
Speaker 1: where you put the EP out, that had to be

778
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:51,239
Speaker 1: an amazing feeling. And even doing R and B. I've

779
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 1: been the only part of Africa I've been to is

780
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 1: South Africa to Johannesburg amazing. It was an event that

781
00:35:56,600 --> 00:35:58,480
Speaker 1: was for women artists, so I got to meet a

782
00:35:58,520 --> 00:36:01,399
Speaker 1: lot of people while I was there. It was called

783
00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 1: her Story.

784
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:04,239
Speaker 2: Oh Fire, What year was that?

785
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:07,520
Speaker 1: Oh it was before the pandemic, okay before and I

786
00:36:07,560 --> 00:36:12,240
Speaker 1: was oh wow, it was a beautiful, beautiful event.

787
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:14,480
Speaker 2: I can imagine to go out there and see.

788
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,200
Speaker 1: The support, and it was like all of the South

789
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:18,799
Speaker 1: African women artists that were there and.

790
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:22,759
Speaker 5: When they pull up, they okay, say girls are going

791
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:23,399
Speaker 5: to pull up?

792
00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:26,799
Speaker 1: Yes, the support that you get back home.

793
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:31,360
Speaker 5: I love South Africa. I love the South African fan base.

794
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:33,759
Speaker 5: I think I'm always just so taken aback by the

795
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,040
Speaker 5: support that I get from them. Because how I dropped

796
00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 5: my EP I was like a law student, had like

797
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 5: seven hundred followers on Instagram, give a take like four

798
00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:44,680
Speaker 5: hundred followers on Twitter, and one day I just dropped

799
00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:47,839
Speaker 5: the link and I switched my phone off because I

800
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 5: was just annoyed at some things that were going on

801
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 5: that day. And the next day in camp, I'm on

802
00:36:53,760 --> 00:36:56,919
Speaker 5: campus in class and my phone is still off because

803
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:57,719
Speaker 5: I'm upset.

804
00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:00,319
Speaker 2: And the lecture hall is just really weird.

805
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:04,360
Speaker 5: Everyone is staring at me, everyone is pointing, everyone is kicking,

806
00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:07,000
Speaker 5: you know. So I'm like, what's going on, Like it's

807
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:08,959
Speaker 5: really uncomfortable. Then I step out, I pull up my phone,

808
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,680
Speaker 5: and then I'm number one. So that's how it happened

809
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:13,040
Speaker 5: organically over overnight.

810
00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:16,920
Speaker 1: But being a law school student and that in like

811
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 1: your producer's dorm room. Yeah, which is amazing. Imagine I'm

812
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:22,560
Speaker 1: going to because first of all, law schools are ready

813
00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:23,080
Speaker 1: hard enough.

814
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,520
Speaker 2: It is stressful. Yeah, yeah, it was stressful.

815
00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:28,840
Speaker 1: And then to be able to even have the creative

816
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:31,319
Speaker 1: because I feel like when I'm working, it's hard for

817
00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:33,560
Speaker 1: me to like do anything creative when I have to

818
00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 1: work so much. So how do you, like, how were

819
00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 1: you able to switch back and forth from like legal mode.

820
00:37:39,320 --> 00:37:41,600
Speaker 4: Of former therapy creative to be able to create.

821
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:44,880
Speaker 5: It was like just a way of life for me,

822
00:37:45,080 --> 00:37:48,600
Speaker 5: Like I just felt very demotivated going to school every

823
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:50,640
Speaker 5: day and not doing something that I love. You know,

824
00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:53,360
Speaker 5: I love education and I love going to school, but

825
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:57,400
Speaker 5: it wasn't really what sets my heart on fire. So literally,

826
00:37:57,480 --> 00:37:59,799
Speaker 5: in between classes, any minute that I got to go

827
00:37:59,880 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 5: to the studio or to my producer's dorm room, I

828
00:38:03,480 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 5: would take it. In between lessons, in between lectures after school,

829
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,600
Speaker 5: Like I would go to school, go to lessons, go

830
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:13,000
Speaker 5: to the studio and be there till like three am,

831
00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:15,680
Speaker 5: go home, shower, and go write an exam and not

832
00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:17,920
Speaker 5: even because I had to, but just because I loved it,

833
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:20,960
Speaker 5: you know, And that's passion yeah, it's passionate. Everyone was

834
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:22,359
Speaker 5: just like, what are you working so hard for?

835
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:23,879
Speaker 2: Like what is this?

836
00:38:24,080 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 5: You're not even like a musician, Like what are you doing.

837
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,040
Speaker 5: I was like, don't worry, don't worry. You know, I'm

838
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 5: doing my own thing. And everyone was just like demotivating

839
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:33,319
Speaker 5: me when it came to making an EP, because it

840
00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:35,480
Speaker 5: was like, no one comes out with an EP, you know,

841
00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:37,799
Speaker 5: you put out a single first, you know, let the

842
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,040
Speaker 5: market get to know you.

843
00:38:39,440 --> 00:38:42,920
Speaker 2: It's like, no, I'm not really prayers. I had a story.

844
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:44,399
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm gonna give you my whole heart.

845
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 4: I'm gonna let you. I'm gonna give you a four law.

846
00:38:47,320 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 2: Appreciate, thank you very much.

847
00:38:49,280 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 1: And that's the no co sign.

848
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 4: No nothing, yeah, no, nothing, how rare that is anything.

849
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:56,680
Speaker 2: I don't have anything.

850
00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:01,399
Speaker 5: God's grace and the sad that African fan base, thank you,

851
00:39:01,640 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 5: and the South African fan base. So you know, I'll

852
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:08,880
Speaker 5: always attribute my success and all of the amazing things

853
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,080
Speaker 5: that have happened to me because of my South African

854
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 5: fan base.

855
00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:16,760
Speaker 2: I know, we're such a diverse nation and.

856
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 5: We have so many genres and I think right now

857
00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:21,520
Speaker 5: I'm a piano is like the center of focus.

858
00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:25,960
Speaker 2: Always, you know, which is amazing I do. I do.

859
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,680
Speaker 2: It is so fun I do. It's a lot of fun.

860
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:32,279
Speaker 1: So I first learned that from Uncle Waffles. Obviously she's

861
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 1: it existed, but that was when I first really knew.

862
00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:35,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, she helped.

863
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 5: She she she played a huge role in helping it crossover,

864
00:39:38,719 --> 00:39:43,359
Speaker 5: you know, with her presence, her energy. So yeah, I

865
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:46,239
Speaker 5: think I feel even more like honored to do what

866
00:39:46,280 --> 00:39:49,680
Speaker 5: I do because even with a piano meaning so much

867
00:39:49,719 --> 00:39:51,799
Speaker 5: and being such a huge part of our culture, I

868
00:39:51,840 --> 00:39:54,240
Speaker 5: always feel like they leave a seat at the table

869
00:39:54,280 --> 00:39:55,600
Speaker 5: for me. It's like, oh, but there is our R

870
00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:57,200
Speaker 5: and B go, we're gonna show her love when she comes.

871
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:58,839
Speaker 5: You know, we're gonna we're gonna listen. You know, we're

872
00:39:58,880 --> 00:40:01,200
Speaker 5: gonna tap in. And that's I feel they look out.

873
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 2: You know. South African fans are not easy to impress.

874
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:12,880
Speaker 2: I'm not easy to They're not easy people. So but

875
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:13,839
Speaker 2: I know they love me, and.

876
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:16,719
Speaker 1: I know that because of the response outside.

877
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:18,880
Speaker 2: One thing about it, to make sure.

878
00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:20,759
Speaker 5: One thing about it, Yeah, one thing about it, and

879
00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:23,080
Speaker 5: you know, it's like I see the love in real life.

880
00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 5: For me, it's always like the real life experiences every

881
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:26,280
Speaker 5: time I'm outside an essay.

882
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:28,279
Speaker 2: Always come up to me. I always show love.

883
00:40:28,719 --> 00:40:32,360
Speaker 5: The shows are insane, The shows are out of this world.

884
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 5: Some of my best shows are in s a just

885
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 5: off of the love the fan based the people. You

886
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:40,879
Speaker 5: guys have to go to go, you know, I've never

887
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:42,000
Speaker 5: to go.

888
00:40:42,080 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 6: Although the Great White Sharks? Where is that at Cape Town?

889
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:47,880
Speaker 2: I'm not maybe you're not going to see the sharks.

890
00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:57,160
Speaker 2: I don't even know what you're talking about. What sharks

891
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 2: vibes with the.

892
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:03,000
Speaker 1: But now let me ask you what are you attracted

893
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:04,840
Speaker 1: to when it comes to dating?

894
00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:05,640
Speaker 4: Right?

895
00:41:05,719 --> 00:41:08,319
Speaker 1: One of the things is it looks? Is it power? Like?

896
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:10,040
Speaker 4: Some people don't care about looks so much?

897
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:14,040
Speaker 1: Right? You know, sometimes there are things that physically we're

898
00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:17,120
Speaker 1: more attracted to than other things. Like for Elaine, what

899
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:18,319
Speaker 1: are some things that you look at?

900
00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 2: You like?

901
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,360
Speaker 1: This is the real connection for me?

902
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:26,120
Speaker 5: For me, it's a man that's able to be considerate.

903
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:29,040
Speaker 5: A lot of men are inconsiderate. And I mean it

904
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:32,080
Speaker 5: just like in the simplest way, like are you are

905
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:34,120
Speaker 5: you a considerate man? Like?

906
00:41:34,239 --> 00:41:35,799
Speaker 2: Are you thinking of me?

907
00:41:36,160 --> 00:41:36,520
Speaker 8: For me?

908
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:37,040
Speaker 2: You know?

909
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 5: Are you thinking so that I don't have to necessarily

910
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 5: think for the both of us. I hate being in

911
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 5: a relationship but feeling like I got to think for

912
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:46,200
Speaker 5: both of us here, I got to make a way

913
00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:46,960
Speaker 5: for both of us.

914
00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 2: I got to figure it out for both of us.

915
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:53,120
Speaker 5: So someone that's considerate and someone that's emotionally intelligent, I

916
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:54,839
Speaker 5: can't deal with what do.

917
00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:57,160
Speaker 2: You mean as nigga? Like, what do you mean? What

918
00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:57,600
Speaker 2: do I mean?

919
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,479
Speaker 5: Like it's in the message, you know, it's like it's

920
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:07,359
Speaker 5: read so emotional intelligence and just being considerate and being

921
00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:11,000
Speaker 5: a provider. And being a provider doesn't necessarily mean giving

922
00:42:11,040 --> 00:42:17,440
Speaker 5: me millions every day, but Oky, maybe you won't complain that,

923
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 5: but providing in so many different ways, you know. Can

924
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 5: you give me your time? Can you give me your attention?

925
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 5: You know a lot of things, but I think the

926
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:28,680
Speaker 5: top three massage?

927
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:30,720
Speaker 2: You know. Can you say, can you do like something

928
00:42:30,719 --> 00:42:32,600
Speaker 2: sweet for me when I'm at the studio? Can you

929
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:36,759
Speaker 2: send a bouquet of flowers or you know, send some

930
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:38,160
Speaker 2: noble to the studio?

931
00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:46,920
Speaker 1: Anybody list it between somebody being considerate and being a stalker.

932
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 5: Oh no, no, I think, oh yeah, there is a

933
00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:53,960
Speaker 5: very thin line, but there really isn't. I think a

934
00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:57,680
Speaker 5: stalker is quite literally dangerous. You know, like you can't

935
00:42:57,680 --> 00:42:59,320
Speaker 5: be all up in my girl twenty four to seven

936
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:00,960
Speaker 5: and you can't be blowing up my phone.

937
00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:05,520
Speaker 1: Because sometimes for guys, they're trying to get your attention.

938
00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:09,240
Speaker 1: But there is definitely a thin line between like sending

939
00:43:10,440 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 1: the studio, sending flowers, doing this if you like somebody,

940
00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 1: oh that's great. If you're not sure, it's like, oh.

941
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:18,279
Speaker 2: This is right.

942
00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:21,080
Speaker 5: And there's also the love bombing aspect. You know, we're

943
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:24,000
Speaker 5: like they'll do everything like and you're so completely hooked.

944
00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:26,920
Speaker 5: So that's why sometimes it's like beyond what you can

945
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:29,200
Speaker 5: do and just like who you are as a person,

946
00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:31,799
Speaker 5: you know, sending me everything every day is cool. But

947
00:43:31,880 --> 00:43:34,880
Speaker 5: a lot of people can do that. Actually a lot

948
00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:36,799
Speaker 5: of people want to do that just because I feel

949
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:39,360
Speaker 5: like that's the easiest thing to do, just send her something.

950
00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:42,880
Speaker 5: But can you actually, you know, act ride, Will you

951
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,360
Speaker 5: actually come by the studio you know and come listen

952
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:48,759
Speaker 5: or you know, actually like give me your time for

953
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:50,319
Speaker 5: real and be involved.

954
00:43:51,080 --> 00:43:53,160
Speaker 1: How are you were playing music for a guy? Like

955
00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:55,520
Speaker 1: if you and him come to listen.

956
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:59,960
Speaker 2: And that's the last thing we're doing. That's my main

957
00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 2: that is.

958
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:08,719
Speaker 5: That is the last thing we are doing. Far away

959
00:44:08,760 --> 00:44:11,320
Speaker 5: from the studio. We can show anyway about the studio.

960
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,640
Speaker 5: The studio you're coming in. If you're like my man

961
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:18,360
Speaker 5: and you already know all the lyrics, you know, you

962
00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:20,960
Speaker 5: can sing the song top to bottom and yeah, other

963
00:44:21,040 --> 00:44:23,480
Speaker 5: than that off limits.

964
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:25,840
Speaker 1: What about him like coming to your shows and stuff?

965
00:44:25,880 --> 00:44:26,400
Speaker 1: Are you cool with?

966
00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:28,719
Speaker 2: That's cool? Okay, Yeah, that's cool.

967
00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:30,399
Speaker 1: Sometimes cute, it's cute.

968
00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:31,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's cute.

969
00:44:31,040 --> 00:44:33,280
Speaker 1: You can come coming backstage with some flowers.

970
00:44:33,360 --> 00:44:36,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, come back to your flowers, you know, show me

971
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:42,480
Speaker 2: the videos you took from backstage, you know, wear the

972
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:44,880
Speaker 2: full merch.

973
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:47,959
Speaker 1: I can't wait to start posting post.

974
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:49,600
Speaker 2: I don't think i'll start I don't think i'll post

975
00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:53,280
Speaker 2: somebody right now. Why must I post?

976
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 6: All of a sudden, You'll see me at my wedding

977
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 6: day and they'll be like, who is this? And even

978
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:58,239
Speaker 6: then it will be the back of his head. You

979
00:44:58,280 --> 00:45:00,560
Speaker 6: won't know anything about him, that's all.

980
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:01,359
Speaker 2: That's all.

981
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 4: You'll see his shoulder.

982
00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:06,200
Speaker 2: I posting posting?

983
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:10,600
Speaker 1: What if he must to post you you can post me, okay, okay.

984
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:15,640
Speaker 2: Very yeah, you can post me, post me. I'm not

985
00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:16,279
Speaker 2: posting though.

986
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:19,239
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's even hard for me to post myself now.

987
00:45:19,280 --> 00:45:22,120
Speaker 5: I must post you that's crazy.

988
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,400
Speaker 1: Well, you think you're just not good at social media? Like,

989
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:24,879
Speaker 1: what do you mean.

990
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:31,080
Speaker 5: I just think I've like learned how to give of

991
00:45:31,200 --> 00:45:37,280
Speaker 5: myself without having to give of my like sacred parts

992
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:40,040
Speaker 5: of my life, you know, parts that actually really play

993
00:45:40,040 --> 00:45:41,239
Speaker 5: a role in sustaining me.

994
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:42,760
Speaker 2: My well being.

995
00:45:43,120 --> 00:45:44,799
Speaker 5: My partner is like a huge part of my life,

996
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 5: you know, And I wouldn't want to throw him into

997
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:47,800
Speaker 5: whatever was going on internet.

998
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:49,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, Internet is crazy.

999
00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:49,600
Speaker 1: It is.

1000
00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 5: Internet is you're having a good day today, Tomorrow you're

1001
00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 5: not having a good day. You could be having a

1002
00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:56,440
Speaker 5: good day in the morning, and then in the evening

1003
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 5: someone tweets something crazy and then it's upside down, right,

1004
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 5: that happened to you.

1005
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:02,239
Speaker 2: It happens all the time.

1006
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:04,399
Speaker 5: This morning, someone will on the phone with me telling

1007
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:05,880
Speaker 5: me it's going down on the internet, and I had

1008
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,479
Speaker 5: to tell them to stop searching my name on the internet. Yeah,

1009
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:10,799
Speaker 5: Like I needed to keep telling my family, like, don't

1010
00:46:10,800 --> 00:46:12,439
Speaker 5: search my name on the internet, Like why are you searching?

1011
00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:17,319
Speaker 1: That's the worst? Yes much your family. Yes, it's like

1012
00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 1: something that I can handle.

1013
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:22,360
Speaker 6: But my family, they want to fight, They want to

1014
00:46:22,360 --> 00:46:23,640
Speaker 6: fight so mad.

1015
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:26,800
Speaker 2: My mom gets so emotional. I'm like, babe, stop searching

1016
00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:28,040
Speaker 2: my name on Twitter.

1017
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:31,280
Speaker 1: I can't imagine anybody saying I've never seen nothing crazy

1018
00:46:31,320 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 1: about you.

1019
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:34,840
Speaker 2: Really, that's great, thank you.

1020
00:46:35,120 --> 00:46:39,840
Speaker 9: Don't search, just bump the music music.

1021
00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 1: I feel like you're definitely a little rebellious, though.

1022
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 2: Am I do I give rebellious? You're an aries. I'm

1023
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:49,640
Speaker 2: an aries territory a little bit.

1024
00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:51,480
Speaker 4: You know, there's a club here in New York that

1025
00:46:51,560 --> 00:46:54,080
Speaker 4: you're a band from because you're aries. I don't know

1026
00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:57,000
Speaker 4: the name of Yes, is that legal?

1027
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:00,320
Speaker 1: It feels like some type of discriminate.

1028
00:47:02,360 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 4: Discrimination is really like a thing for real, But they

1029
00:47:04,960 --> 00:47:05,400
Speaker 4: talk about it.

1030
00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:08,120
Speaker 1: I saw that. Is there a sign that you won't date?

1031
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 1: Or do you pay attention to that?

1032
00:47:09,760 --> 00:47:11,759
Speaker 5: I don't really pay attention. But Gemini is give me

1033
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:13,600
Speaker 5: a tough time? Is it is anyone in Gemini?

1034
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:16,440
Speaker 1: Gemini men are very.

1035
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:23,719
Speaker 4: Say that, you know, I love a Gemini apparently. I've

1036
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:24,319
Speaker 4: had so many.

1037
00:47:25,120 --> 00:47:29,719
Speaker 7: All of my significant relationships have been with Gemini, Gemini men, Scorpio.

1038
00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:31,600
Speaker 4: The longest relationships.

1039
00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, be played with Yeah. Cancers are also a bit wild.

1040
00:47:36,680 --> 00:47:41,279
Speaker 4: There's a cancer buzzing around me. There's a cancer now,

1041
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:50,360
Speaker 4: and I'm like.

1042
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:51,359
Speaker 1: You know, because I search things like on Instagram because

1043
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:54,280
Speaker 1: I'm a Capricorn. I always see like all these memes

1044
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:56,440
Speaker 1: about Capricorn and they be so accurate.

1045
00:47:56,760 --> 00:47:59,759
Speaker 5: Every time they are accurate. I think that's that's like

1046
00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:02,319
Speaker 5: the mind about it is like I'm like.

1047
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:03,560
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't really believe in it, and then I'm like,

1048
00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:09,400
Speaker 2: but wait, they gag you. I'm like, yeah, that is

1049
00:48:09,440 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 2: so mean. That's crazy when.

1050
00:48:11,680 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 1: When you want to toilest and in your man means

1051
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:16,880
Speaker 1: like was like did you see this?

1052
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:21,000
Speaker 2: Did you see this? That's my love language? And food,

1053
00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:24,359
Speaker 2: like I want to try this. I love food. I

1054
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:27,120
Speaker 2: love food so much. That's my love language.

1055
00:48:27,520 --> 00:48:31,400
Speaker 1: Now listen, have you ever been like, just do you

1056
00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:32,399
Speaker 1: believe in love at first sight?

1057
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 5: I do?

1058
00:48:34,840 --> 00:48:35,200
Speaker 2: I do.

1059
00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:36,480
Speaker 1: Has that happened to you?

1060
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:41,440
Speaker 2: It has, which is why I love or lust? No,

1061
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:43,959
Speaker 2: it was love. It was love.

1062
00:48:44,320 --> 00:48:48,719
Speaker 5: It was just like for me to like, really, I

1063
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 5: think something is love. It must be something that I feel,

1064
00:48:51,719 --> 00:48:54,080
Speaker 5: you know, and there's some there is someone that I've

1065
00:48:54,120 --> 00:48:55,720
Speaker 5: met for the first time and I was like, Wow,

1066
00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 5: I feel I have feelings for you off the bad?

1067
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:01,799
Speaker 1: Wow, where did that go.

1068
00:49:03,320 --> 00:49:03,560
Speaker 2: Far?

1069
00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:05,279
Speaker 4: Really far?

1070
00:49:05,719 --> 00:49:10,520
Speaker 2: It's still going You didn't mentioned that it's getting hot

1071
00:49:10,520 --> 00:49:11,640
Speaker 2: in here, and.

1072
00:49:16,719 --> 00:49:19,880
Speaker 5: But yeah, to be continued, to be continued on the

1073
00:49:19,920 --> 00:49:22,600
Speaker 5: next project, maybe I'll say a little something more more.

1074
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:25,800
Speaker 1: Because it feels like this album started off a little

1075
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:28,919
Speaker 1: heartbreak ish and then it kind of like then there

1076
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:33,400
Speaker 1: was a relapsed situation and then there's the you know more.

1077
00:49:34,200 --> 00:49:37,239
Speaker 5: But some of the ones up there, it did end

1078
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:38,280
Speaker 5: on a sweet note.

1079
00:49:38,520 --> 00:49:41,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, So it's like it's like a happy ending of

1080
00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:47,320
Speaker 2: some sort. Yeah. Yeah, I never like to end projects

1081
00:49:47,320 --> 00:49:48,640
Speaker 2: on like a terrible note like.

1082
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:50,400
Speaker 1: Ending.

1083
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 2: It was a good ending.

1084
00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:53,879
Speaker 1: For Lovely Slowly is a really fun song.

1085
00:49:54,239 --> 00:49:56,880
Speaker 2: Thank you. That's my favorite song. That's the song.

1086
00:49:57,200 --> 00:49:57,719
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1087
00:49:57,880 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 5: I had so much fun putting that song together, and

1088
00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:03,120
Speaker 5: we incorporated rock into it as well, which was my

1089
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:06,400
Speaker 5: first time. I made the song with my good friend

1090
00:50:06,400 --> 00:50:10,759
Speaker 5: and producer Zeke he South African, and we were working

1091
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:11,400
Speaker 5: on that song.

1092
00:50:11,239 --> 00:50:14,319
Speaker 2: For two years. Wow. Yes, we started.

1093
00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:15,960
Speaker 5: Working on that song in twenty twenty two when I

1094
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:18,560
Speaker 5: was staying in l A. And we have a bunch

1095
00:50:18,600 --> 00:50:22,160
Speaker 5: of other songs together as well, but that song we

1096
00:50:22,160 --> 00:50:25,760
Speaker 5: were just going back and forth on like the palette

1097
00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:27,759
Speaker 5: that we wanted to create, you know, we just like

1098
00:50:27,840 --> 00:50:31,360
Speaker 5: wanted something that felt smooth fresh. We were listening to

1099
00:50:31,400 --> 00:50:33,759
Speaker 5: a lot of like full columns at the time as well,

1100
00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:35,680
Speaker 5: who was like inspiring the sounds?

1101
00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:40,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, we were. We went really just.

1102
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:44,040
Speaker 1: That one song, I can feel it.

1103
00:50:45,360 --> 00:50:49,360
Speaker 4: We all had that studio.

1104
00:50:57,520 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, so yeah.

1105
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:02,319
Speaker 5: In Pala as well, we spend so much time just

1106
00:51:02,360 --> 00:51:05,080
Speaker 5: listening to these fire artists and finding a way that

1107
00:51:05,280 --> 00:51:08,719
Speaker 5: felt like unique to me as a South African you know,

1108
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,320
Speaker 5: R and B artist and.

1109
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:14,239
Speaker 1: Funny at your age, like the music that you're inspired by.

1110
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:15,200
Speaker 2: I'm an old soul.

1111
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:16,279
Speaker 1: Yes, so much.

1112
00:51:16,360 --> 00:51:17,040
Speaker 2: I can tell.

1113
00:51:20,040 --> 00:51:22,719
Speaker 5: I don't send playlists because I feel like boys my

1114
00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:24,640
Speaker 5: age will be like girl.

1115
00:51:25,760 --> 00:51:28,560
Speaker 1: It's so impressive when a man can be on your

1116
00:51:28,680 --> 00:51:30,040
Speaker 1: musical like palette.

1117
00:51:30,120 --> 00:51:31,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know what I mean, because.

1118
00:51:31,320 --> 00:51:32,200
Speaker 1: That's a hard thing to do.

1119
00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:34,040
Speaker 2: Music is so intimate.

1120
00:51:34,280 --> 00:51:37,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like being able to lay around and listen to

1121
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:40,920
Speaker 1: music that y'all both can like have a unique It

1122
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:41,560
Speaker 1: is amazing.

1123
00:51:41,920 --> 00:51:42,920
Speaker 4: That's a real intimacy.

1124
00:51:44,000 --> 00:51:45,960
Speaker 1: There's nothing works then when somebody doesn't like the type

1125
00:51:45,960 --> 00:51:47,560
Speaker 1: of music you like and they'd be playing shit and

1126
00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:48,120
Speaker 1: you'd be like.

1127
00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:52,120
Speaker 5: That happened to me a lot when I was staying

1128
00:51:52,120 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 5: in La Every time I said I was South African.

1129
00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:57,759
Speaker 5: They would like search indigenous like South African music, and

1130
00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:00,719
Speaker 5: that's what they'd be playing, like on the car to date,

1131
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:04,840
Speaker 5: and I'd be like, damn, like I listened to trap,

1132
00:52:04,920 --> 00:52:05,720
Speaker 5: like you can play something.

1133
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:11,680
Speaker 2: I was like, it's okay, like yeah, yeah, yeah.

1134
00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:13,120
Speaker 1: Have you ever dated white guys?

1135
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:13,480
Speaker 5: No?

1136
00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:14,040
Speaker 2: I haven't.

1137
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:17,160
Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, you guys are thinking about being it all

1138
00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 1: types of men.

1139
00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:22,040
Speaker 2: I haven't. Okay that you haven't either, I haven't.

1140
00:52:22,120 --> 00:52:24,560
Speaker 1: I want to say that I discriminated. It just hasn't happened.

1141
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, it hasn't happened for me.

1142
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 1: It's different.

1143
00:52:27,360 --> 00:52:29,839
Speaker 6: You know what I want to I can imagine Blazian baby.

1144
00:52:30,440 --> 00:52:32,520
Speaker 6: I want to have a Blatian baby. That's like my dream.

1145
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:34,719
Speaker 1: It'd be like because my mom is black, my dad

1146
00:52:34,760 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 1: is exactly. I'm like, you know, have you ever dated

1147
00:52:38,239 --> 00:52:39,480
Speaker 1: another race at all? Period?

1148
00:52:39,760 --> 00:52:45,800
Speaker 2: I haven't, Okay, yeah, I really haven't.

1149
00:52:46,000 --> 00:52:48,919
Speaker 1: No, have you dated a Asian guy ever?

1150
00:52:50,600 --> 00:52:51,839
Speaker 2: I haven't dated one.

1151
00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:53,799
Speaker 1: But you've slept yeah, okay.

1152
00:52:55,040 --> 00:52:55,239
Speaker 6: One.

1153
00:52:55,960 --> 00:53:00,560
Speaker 5: It was great and there's never like a culture barrier

1154
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:01,640
Speaker 5: or cultural shock.

1155
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:03,719
Speaker 2: Well there is so.

1156
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 6: Well I don't know because I didn't really like to

1157
00:53:07,280 --> 00:53:10,320
Speaker 6: see him that long, but I guess in my mind

1158
00:53:10,400 --> 00:53:13,040
Speaker 6: and I made this up in my mind. I lost

1159
00:53:13,080 --> 00:53:15,480
Speaker 6: my mom, and so I'm like, I want a strong

1160
00:53:16,040 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 6: woman of color, and I don't know if I want

1161
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:23,960
Speaker 6: it to be a black woman like for my kids grandparents.

1162
00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:26,279
Speaker 6: I would love to, but I'm like, I don't know

1163
00:53:26,320 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 6: if they I don't feel like they make black women

1164
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:28,719
Speaker 6: like they used to.

1165
00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:29,799
Speaker 2: I don't even know my.

1166
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,640
Speaker 6: Generation, seriously, like I don't know, like my when I

1167
00:53:32,640 --> 00:53:34,239
Speaker 6: think of my grandmother's I'm like, I don't know if

1168
00:53:34,239 --> 00:53:37,480
Speaker 6: any of these bitches could ever measure even me. And

1169
00:53:37,520 --> 00:53:39,359
Speaker 6: so I'm like, Okay, what would the next best thing?

1170
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:41,920
Speaker 6: I feel like an Asian grandmother would be.

1171
00:53:41,800 --> 00:53:44,680
Speaker 4: Like really disciplined and really as I.

1172
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:48,480
Speaker 1: Need that, You're right, grandmother who don't like black people?

1173
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:53,080
Speaker 6: Yeah that you know, obviously that wouldn't work, but you know,

1174
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:55,120
Speaker 6: I would need them to be very accepting, like.

1175
00:53:56,440 --> 00:53:56,960
Speaker 2: What was that?

1176
00:53:57,400 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 1: Who's that?

1177
00:53:57,960 --> 00:53:59,719
Speaker 6: Who's the girl on the talk not the talk, the

1178
00:53:59,719 --> 00:54:02,720
Speaker 6: real like her mom is so cute?

1179
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:05,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know, we got to ask, no kidding,

1180
00:54:06,520 --> 00:54:09,400
Speaker 1: he might tell you something else, but yeah, something like

1181
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:10,520
Speaker 1: that that.

1182
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:11,680
Speaker 2: I love that for you.

1183
00:54:11,880 --> 00:54:13,960
Speaker 7: That is very I love that for you is so

1184
00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:16,400
Speaker 7: interesting if you do that the culture. I mean, you

1185
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,239
Speaker 7: just want her to have some culture and substances. What

1186
00:54:18,280 --> 00:54:20,040
Speaker 7: you say, I do. And if it doesn't come from

1187
00:54:20,080 --> 00:54:22,240
Speaker 7: a strong Black woman, maybe a strong Asian woman.

1188
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:26,799
Speaker 6: Somebody else from a different culture, I think, right, being

1189
00:54:27,040 --> 00:54:27,880
Speaker 6: a person of color.

1190
00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:29,240
Speaker 4: What you're saying somebody?

1191
00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:32,880
Speaker 2: So you think you're data South African men? Yeah? Do

1192
00:54:32,920 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 2: you know? Do you know what they look like? Do

1193
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 2: you know what they like? What they like? I don't know.

1194
00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:41,799
Speaker 2: I don't want to speak bad on my brothers. What

1195
00:54:41,840 --> 00:54:42,120
Speaker 2: they like.

1196
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:45,719
Speaker 5: These are like they love black girls, Yeah, they love

1197
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:47,239
Speaker 5: the South African men.

1198
00:54:47,320 --> 00:54:49,399
Speaker 2: Are you know modern men?

1199
00:54:49,600 --> 00:54:53,080
Speaker 5: Someone into black girls, someone into traditional South African women,

1200
00:54:53,600 --> 00:54:54,680
Speaker 5: someone into white women.

1201
00:54:54,800 --> 00:54:58,720
Speaker 2: Some you know data cross that's pretty much yeah. Modern.

1202
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:01,720
Speaker 1: What do you mean you speaking bad?

1203
00:55:00,239 --> 00:55:00,359
Speaker 5: Right?

1204
00:55:02,040 --> 00:55:04,600
Speaker 1: I don't like you from your experience.

1205
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:06,000
Speaker 2: From my experience.

1206
00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:10,640
Speaker 5: You need to give yourself time to find the right

1207
00:55:10,719 --> 00:55:14,520
Speaker 5: type of South African men, you know, I think it's

1208
00:55:14,560 --> 00:55:17,840
Speaker 5: I think it might be difficult and rocky in the beginning.

1209
00:55:20,040 --> 00:55:22,279
Speaker 5: There's different types of men in South Africa. There's men

1210
00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:25,120
Speaker 5: that are into independent women, you know, women who have

1211
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:28,800
Speaker 5: autonomy of their lives, of their bodies, of their choices,

1212
00:55:29,080 --> 00:55:32,239
Speaker 5: women who are confident in themselves, who speak out, who

1213
00:55:32,280 --> 00:55:36,120
Speaker 5: speak against men, And there's some men that don't like

1214
00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:38,759
Speaker 5: that and aren't into it and are totally opposed to

1215
00:55:38,840 --> 00:55:40,120
Speaker 5: women who have a voice.

1216
00:55:42,239 --> 00:55:44,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, do they all men like that who are liking it?

1217
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:46,000
Speaker 2: Why do you cuss so much?

1218
00:55:46,040 --> 00:55:46,480
Speaker 4: In Lane?

1219
00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:49,560
Speaker 2: We don't like what you were wearing that video, you

1220
00:55:49,560 --> 00:55:50,359
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Yeah?

1221
00:55:50,440 --> 00:55:52,800
Speaker 4: So, and I'm just saying more conservative.

1222
00:55:53,040 --> 00:55:55,320
Speaker 5: We do have some conservative and we do have modern.

1223
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:59,160
Speaker 5: We do have traditional, there's polygamy. If you're trying to

1224
00:55:59,320 --> 00:56:04,640
Speaker 5: have sister, we have everything. There are people who are

1225
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:08,040
Speaker 5: with you. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not.

1226
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:15,000
Speaker 1: What's the difference between men in l A and you

1227
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:16,799
Speaker 1: would say South African men.

1228
00:56:17,280 --> 00:56:21,359
Speaker 5: I feel like South African men they still some way

1229
00:56:21,880 --> 00:56:26,520
Speaker 5: have like they like there's like a quarter sea for you,

1230
00:56:26,520 --> 00:56:28,040
Speaker 5: you know, I don't know if it's like the African

1231
00:56:28,120 --> 00:56:31,600
Speaker 5: thing or like the There's like a spirit of Ubuntu.

1232
00:56:31,640 --> 00:56:32,480
Speaker 2: It's called Auntu.

1233
00:56:32,520 --> 00:56:36,960
Speaker 5: It's like a peoplehood, you know, being a good person overall,

1234
00:56:37,160 --> 00:56:39,560
Speaker 5: you know, being caring. So there's still a spirit of Ubuntu.

1235
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:44,439
Speaker 5: Even if you're meeting yes, you know, you can still

1236
00:56:44,480 --> 00:56:46,480
Speaker 5: feel like, Okay, I'm speaking to a regular person. That

1237
00:56:46,520 --> 00:56:49,759
Speaker 5: has regard for me and respect for me until you

1238
00:56:50,120 --> 00:56:52,520
Speaker 5: figure out what they're like in a romantic relationship. But

1239
00:56:52,560 --> 00:56:54,879
Speaker 5: I think that's the difference between that. I think when

1240
00:56:54,920 --> 00:56:57,479
Speaker 5: you come to America, you know, whether you're a black

1241
00:56:57,480 --> 00:57:00,440
Speaker 5: woman or not, you're just damn what can you offer?

1242
00:57:00,680 --> 00:57:03,200
Speaker 5: You know, what you bring it to the table? Or

1243
00:57:03,239 --> 00:57:07,960
Speaker 5: there's nothing significant to them, like you're just there's so

1244
00:57:08,000 --> 00:57:10,319
Speaker 5: many women that they have access to that they don't

1245
00:57:10,360 --> 00:57:13,960
Speaker 5: see women as like valuable or even significant. I just

1246
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 5: didn't feel significant, you know. Yeah, I don't know if

1247
00:57:18,320 --> 00:57:18,640
Speaker 5: I'm wrong.

1248
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:20,040
Speaker 2: Was I in the wrong? Was in the wrong?

1249
00:57:20,360 --> 00:57:23,120
Speaker 1: I think La is different too than others. Yeah, La,

1250
00:57:24,000 --> 00:57:25,760
Speaker 1: La is because a lot of people there I think

1251
00:57:25,800 --> 00:57:29,760
Speaker 1: aren't from there, and people move to LA because they're pursuing,

1252
00:57:29,920 --> 00:57:35,080
Speaker 1: like you know, so they move there, and sois Sometimes

1253
00:57:35,120 --> 00:57:36,960
Speaker 1: it can feel transactional, like what do you do?

1254
00:57:37,560 --> 00:57:40,480
Speaker 2: You know first, that's the first thing they all say,

1255
00:57:40,720 --> 00:57:41,240
Speaker 2: what do you do?

1256
00:57:41,680 --> 00:57:41,880
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1257
00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:44,840
Speaker 4: Atlanta is the same way.

1258
00:57:44,880 --> 00:57:47,000
Speaker 2: I haven't been to I live there.

1259
00:57:47,200 --> 00:57:48,440
Speaker 4: It's very what do you do?

1260
00:57:49,080 --> 00:57:49,360
Speaker 1: They do?

1261
00:57:49,440 --> 00:57:52,040
Speaker 7: Ex where you're from because most people aren't from there,

1262
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:54,760
Speaker 7: but it's very what do you do? There's a lot

1263
00:57:54,760 --> 00:57:57,800
Speaker 7: of like how can you help me? Help me type

1264
00:57:57,800 --> 00:58:00,840
Speaker 7: of vibes? I get that, like how can I what?

1265
00:58:00,840 --> 00:58:04,840
Speaker 4: What type of you know? What can you offer me?

1266
00:58:04,880 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 7: As far as like your resources and your network?

1267
00:58:08,600 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 4: And it's just like, what's.

1268
00:58:11,840 --> 00:58:15,240
Speaker 1: Up, Elena? I would think though you feel you seem

1269
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:19,360
Speaker 1: like a prize. You could sing you're beautiful than your

1270
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 1: baby hares have happened every time you keep looking at you.

1271
00:58:26,800 --> 00:58:27,160
Speaker 2: Thank you.

1272
00:58:28,200 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 1: That's one of them.

1273
00:58:28,880 --> 00:58:36,240
Speaker 5: D M is like the dams are rowdy, rowdy. You

1274
00:58:36,280 --> 00:58:39,080
Speaker 5: can have to catch me in your life. Yeah, if

1275
00:58:39,080 --> 00:58:41,120
Speaker 5: you're serious, it has to be in real life. Do

1276
00:58:41,200 --> 00:58:44,600
Speaker 5: you respond to the d M s. Who's the spiciest

1277
00:58:44,680 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 5: d M you've gotten.

1278
00:58:49,720 --> 00:58:55,280
Speaker 2: That? What was that? I wouldn't put them on.

1279
00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:03,960
Speaker 5: It's always like high profile people who are actively in relationships.

1280
00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:06,200
Speaker 2: That's why I'm like, I wouldn't want to, you know.

1281
00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 5: So I'm just like it's yeah, it's crazy, yeah.

1282
00:59:09,680 --> 00:59:10,880
Speaker 1: Disappointing.

1283
00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:16,680
Speaker 5: With you. You know, I'm not so keen on dms

1284
00:59:16,720 --> 00:59:19,800
Speaker 5: because it's just like, what's really going on? So you're

1285
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:21,240
Speaker 5: gonna have to catch me in real life and tell

1286
00:59:21,240 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 5: me your story straight, and then.

1287
00:59:22,760 --> 00:59:24,680
Speaker 1: They'll be like, oh, that wasn't me from my pro

1288
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:26,440
Speaker 1: that was my homeboy that do you know.

1289
00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:26,840
Speaker 2: What I mean?

1290
00:59:26,960 --> 00:59:28,800
Speaker 5: You know, and then they take a screenshot if you

1291
00:59:28,880 --> 00:59:32,320
Speaker 5: respond like, oh, Elene is responding like you know.

1292
00:59:32,920 --> 00:59:34,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know the best.

1293
00:59:34,240 --> 00:59:37,120
Speaker 1: Maybe it is an approach on a business level, you think.

1294
00:59:37,160 --> 00:59:40,080
Speaker 2: So that would upset me if I think you're about.

1295
00:59:39,880 --> 00:59:41,920
Speaker 1: To give you some money and they could be like

1296
00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:44,280
Speaker 1: and they could really do business then get.

1297
00:59:44,160 --> 00:59:46,400
Speaker 4: To know you as a p okay okay, okay and make.

1298
00:59:46,320 --> 00:59:48,720
Speaker 1: You feel more comfortable. But that if they really want

1299
00:59:48,720 --> 00:59:51,520
Speaker 1: to court you, okay, I would think, okay, because how

1300
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:52,760
Speaker 1: else are you going to respond? You're not going to

1301
00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:58,680
Speaker 1: respond to somebody up Hey maybe girls know right, But

1302
00:59:58,760 --> 01:00:01,320
Speaker 1: if somebody's like, you know, we have this baby hair

1303
01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:02,960
Speaker 1: product that we think you'd be great.

1304
01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:13,160
Speaker 5: To Yeah, what do you need? Yeah?

1305
01:00:13,160 --> 01:00:14,000
Speaker 2: I will respond to that.

1306
01:00:14,280 --> 01:00:14,440
Speaker 5: Well.

1307
01:00:14,440 --> 01:00:16,440
Speaker 1: Ellene. We appreciate you so much for coming.

1308
01:00:16,600 --> 01:00:18,880
Speaker 2: You so sweet, Thank you for having me. This was

1309
01:00:18,880 --> 01:00:20,919
Speaker 2: so much fun. This was my first you know, girl

1310
01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:24,240
Speaker 2: get together here and I had a great time.

1311
01:00:24,440 --> 01:00:26,160
Speaker 1: I had a good time and we had a good time.

1312
01:00:26,160 --> 01:00:28,800
Speaker 1: Because your music and then getting to talk to you

1313
01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:31,600
Speaker 1: in real life and understand where those songs are coming from.

1314
01:00:31,760 --> 01:00:34,320
Speaker 1: I think that connection is important and so we got

1315
01:00:34,320 --> 01:00:37,480
Speaker 1: a chance to really feel what your past experiences have

1316
01:00:37,560 --> 01:00:39,600
Speaker 1: been like. And like you're only what twenty.

1317
01:00:39,280 --> 01:00:41,240
Speaker 2: Five, yes, twenty five.

1318
01:00:41,960 --> 01:00:46,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is when all the ship stuff happens. I know,

1319
01:00:46,120 --> 01:00:48,480
Speaker 1: you can get it out the way you want, like

1320
01:00:48,520 --> 01:00:51,480
Speaker 1: all the shitty things to happen earlier, so that you're like, Okay,

1321
01:00:52,040 --> 01:00:54,720
Speaker 1: you got that out the way, Dallas. I'm always grateful that,

1322
01:00:54,760 --> 01:00:57,240
Speaker 1: like I went through a lot earlier on yeah, so

1323
01:00:57,280 --> 01:00:59,720
Speaker 1: that I could kind of like learn my lessons.

1324
01:01:00,160 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 2: I agree. I'm never opposed to failing forward, so you don't.

1325
01:01:05,080 --> 01:01:06,680
Speaker 1: I'm not opposed to tripping up this field.

1326
01:01:06,720 --> 01:01:08,520
Speaker 2: I'm not. I'm not opposed to it.

1327
01:01:09,040 --> 01:01:11,240
Speaker 1: All right, Well, Elaine, thank you much, and you guys

1328
01:01:11,240 --> 01:01:14,000
Speaker 1: make sure you check out her new project that's out

1329
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:15,880
Speaker 1: right now. Because you did this independently.

1330
01:01:16,120 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 2: I did so.

1331
01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:20,320
Speaker 1: And your heart doesn't feel so stone cold. It feels

1332
01:01:20,320 --> 01:01:21,800
Speaker 1: like it's it's getting warm.

1333
01:01:21,920 --> 01:01:22,840
Speaker 2: It's always warm.

1334
01:01:22,840 --> 01:01:25,440
Speaker 5: It's just sometimes I set up real quick before I

1335
01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:28,960
Speaker 5: do certain things or head you know, head places, or

1336
01:01:29,040 --> 01:01:30,360
Speaker 5: engage with certain people.

1337
01:01:30,480 --> 01:01:32,840
Speaker 2: So I'm learning when to do, you know what I mean.

1338
01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:35,240
Speaker 2: So I'm learning how to balance.

1339
01:01:35,960 --> 01:01:37,840
Speaker 5: Yes, I'm planning my I'm going to be having a

1340
01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:41,480
Speaker 5: national tour this Valentine's unfair, but yes, it's going to

1341
01:01:41,480 --> 01:01:44,200
Speaker 5: be exciting and then hopefully there'll be more in the US,

1342
01:01:44,520 --> 01:01:46,520
Speaker 5: so stay tuned to the socials.

1343
01:01:46,720 --> 01:01:49,080
Speaker 6: Okay, we have a music video idea for you.

1344
01:01:49,080 --> 01:01:51,720
Speaker 2: You do what is it? You know the story of Medusa?

1345
01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:55,000
Speaker 6: Yes, and like she she turns men to stone, but

1346
01:01:55,120 --> 01:01:58,560
Speaker 6: like the backstory is because she was she was heartbroken.

1347
01:01:58,880 --> 01:02:02,120
Speaker 2: You should do a player on that. You a you?

1348
01:02:02,200 --> 01:02:02,840
Speaker 4: All right?

1349
01:02:03,440 --> 01:02:11,120
Speaker 5: We like? Okay, creative director director direct all Bright, Well,

1350
01:02:11,120 --> 01:02:11,360
Speaker 5: thank you.

1351
01:02:11,440 --> 01:02:12,720
Speaker 1: It's Lift Service in Light.

1352
01:02:13,360 --> 01:02:13,959
Speaker 2: Thank you.