WEBVTT - EP 425: The Contract to My Polyamory (Ft. Jerrie Johnson) 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:01.840 Welcome to Decisions Decisions. 0:00:01.880 --> 0:00:03.840 I don't think you should say decision decisions. 0:00:03.960 --> 0:00:07.120 It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty. You definitely 0:00:07.120 --> 0:00:09.320 say to welcome, Welcome to the new podcast. 0:00:10.520 --> 0:00:13.920 May you want to say together, decisions decisions? 0:00:14.200 --> 0:00:16.040 Mike check, Mike check? Is this thing on? 0:00:16.520 --> 0:00:20.079 Hey, guys, we are exactly one week out from the 0:00:20.120 --> 0:00:24.760 release of our book, No Holds Barred, a dual manifesto 0:00:25.120 --> 0:00:29.320 of sexual exploration and power written by yours truly, your 0:00:29.320 --> 0:00:32.280 girl Mandy B and we ZWTF And I wanted to 0:00:32.320 --> 0:00:34.680 let y'all know you have the chance to meet us, 0:00:34.880 --> 0:00:39.400 keep your book signed, and experience guided conversations with us 0:00:39.479 --> 0:00:40.840 about this book. 0:00:41.080 --> 0:00:43.600 And so I'm about to ring off the date to you, guys. 0:00:43.800 --> 0:00:46.960 Hopefully we're able to see you so on June twenty third, 0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:50.640 virtually we are doing another talk shop live where you 0:00:50.640 --> 0:00:53.199 can literally join us and ask us anything you'd like 0:00:53.479 --> 0:00:54.360 about the book. 0:00:54.160 --> 0:00:57.760 While also ordering it. You get a signed. 0:00:57.480 --> 0:00:59.520 Version of the copy from our talk Shop Live event. 0:01:00.040 --> 0:01:02.360 June twenty fourth at seven pm. We are at the 0:01:02.360 --> 0:01:05.959 Word Bookstore in Brooklyn, New York, with a guided conversation. 0:01:06.520 --> 0:01:11.240 June twenty fifth, at seven pm. Come and get your signatures. 0:01:10.880 --> 0:01:12.080 At Uncle Bobby's. 0:01:12.360 --> 0:01:14.319 That's right, we are signing your books there. 0:01:14.760 --> 0:01:17.559 June twenty sixth at seven pm, we are at Solid 0:01:17.560 --> 0:01:20.600 State Books in Washington, d C. And then join us 0:01:20.640 --> 0:01:23.679 as well June twenty seventh at five pm in New 0:01:23.720 --> 0:01:28.840 Haven Pride Center. That's New Haven, Connecticut. And then twenty 0:01:28.920 --> 0:01:32.440 ninth Atlanta joe Ja three pm. You can join me 0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:35.840 and some good friends for a conversation as well as 0:01:35.840 --> 0:01:36.480 book signing. 0:01:36.760 --> 0:01:39.119 And La Weezi is not leaving you hanging. 0:01:39.440 --> 0:01:42.080 July second, at seven pm she will be at Reparations 0:01:42.319 --> 0:01:43.399 with Shan Boudram. 0:01:43.840 --> 0:01:46.320 Really really, really excited to have you guys. 0:01:46.200 --> 0:01:50.760 Join us on this monumental week of our book release, 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:54.480 No Holds Barred. Go to our Instagram page, get your 0:01:54.480 --> 0:01:57.280 tickets or put it in your calendars to pull up 0:01:57.320 --> 0:02:01.520 to these bookstores to meet us in person again during 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:04.040 the week of our release of No Holds barn We 0:02:04.080 --> 0:02:08.120 cannot wait to see you there. Welcome everybody to another 0:02:08.200 --> 0:02:10.040 episode of DC. 0:02:10.200 --> 0:02:13.320 The y'alls, The City, y'alls. It's your girl, maybe b 0:02:13.480 --> 0:02:15.560 a Ka dat Beach. It's weazy. 0:02:15.840 --> 0:02:18.520 We're having another three so with somebody from Survival of 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:19.960 the Ticket. 0:02:21.040 --> 0:02:21.440 We have. 0:02:22.600 --> 0:02:27.840 We have actress Jerry Johnson from Harlem and Survival of 0:02:27.880 --> 0:02:29.800 the Thickest and a lot more. But I do want 0:02:29.800 --> 0:02:31.680 to talk about your two roles there. So that's what 0:02:31.760 --> 0:02:34.119 you could sit and watch. Now, are they They're both 0:02:34.160 --> 0:02:35.840 on One is on Netflix, one is on. 0:02:35.840 --> 0:02:39.560 Hulu, Amazon Prime, Amazon Prime Prime Video Prime. 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:44.080 There we go, Prime Video. Welcome Jerry to the plot. 0:02:44.120 --> 0:02:46.800 I've been trying to make this happen for a very 0:02:46.840 --> 0:02:47.720 long time. 0:02:48.240 --> 0:02:49.560 Since last year. 0:02:50.919 --> 0:02:55.480 I'm well, No, I met Jerry through both of our 0:02:55.560 --> 0:02:56.919 male friends or mutual friends. 0:02:57.000 --> 0:02:58.880 Yes, So we all went out one night. 0:03:00.160 --> 0:03:02.960 After it was Paddle of the Sexes, Yes, And so 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:05.400 we go to I don't even remember some bar. We drinking, 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.919 and everyone at the table's kind of having their own conversations, 0:03:09.160 --> 0:03:10.440 and I think, I don't even know what the fuck 0:03:10.480 --> 0:03:12.519 it she was talking to, but I end up getting 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:16.080 into deep talks. Wait this one right here, and I 0:03:16.160 --> 0:03:17.400 was like, oh my god, I think I love you, 0:03:17.480 --> 0:03:18.799 but I don't love you because you're a taking woman 0:03:18.840 --> 0:03:21.600 and I'm gonna respect that. But also we have to 0:03:21.600 --> 0:03:24.920 bring you onto the show to talk about all things. 0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:29.200 So I guess before we start, how do you identify 0:03:29.360 --> 0:03:32.799 what is your relationship status, and I don't want to 0:03:32.800 --> 0:03:35.280 say age. She never asked this, so this one, no, 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:37.440 this is before because I want to get into the 0:03:37.520 --> 0:03:41.520 character she plays, and then all the things. So yeah, 0:03:41.920 --> 0:03:47.800 identity and relationship status and if you're a lifestylear, what's 0:03:47.920 --> 0:03:48.720 the bubble or. 0:03:48.680 --> 0:03:54.720 A label if you align with any I am the 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:55.840 Jerry Johnson. 0:03:57.320 --> 0:04:03.600 I identify as a non binary person. But any respectable pronouns 0:04:03.640 --> 0:04:04.200 work for me. 0:04:04.920 --> 0:04:09.600 Queen. Mostly you know, I am currently engaged. 0:04:09.960 --> 0:04:15.280 I am polyamorous, so we are open and. 0:04:16.440 --> 0:04:20.680 I'm a lot of things. We can get into things 0:04:20.680 --> 0:04:21.520 that I've heard about. 0:04:21.560 --> 0:04:24.200 So I haven't gotten to watch Harlem resp yet but 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:27.520 found this picture. I have to show it to me 0:04:28.760 --> 0:04:33.479 because this photo got sent to me three times, one 0:04:33.520 --> 0:04:38.840 spy Brianda, one spy, two random fans. And it was 0:04:38.880 --> 0:04:41.520 the first time I came across your page. Someone said, 0:04:41.560 --> 0:04:43.280 why are you and Mandy kissing in this photos? 0:04:43.360 --> 0:04:45.320 Oh my god, stop it. 0:04:46.880 --> 0:04:52.000 Very and I was like, my hair is dark right now, 0:04:52.120 --> 0:04:54.480 but this time my hair we look at Jerry is Wow. 0:04:58.040 --> 0:05:01.760 That ship was so fucking it's cool. Let's be let's 0:05:01.760 --> 0:05:06.880 be very clear. I am sent every light skin to 0:05:07.040 --> 0:05:10.400 light brown skinned woman with short blonde hair and some ass. 0:05:10.600 --> 0:05:13.760 It was to you blonde, then the brain it was 0:05:13.760 --> 0:05:16.240 like it was literally our hol asthetic always. Then the 0:05:16.279 --> 0:05:22.840 second thing was my partner watches Harlem, so I was like. 0:05:22.800 --> 0:05:24.280 Oh, we're having this girl on it. 0:05:25.200 --> 0:05:27.680 Before I could say it, he was like, oh, don't 0:05:27.680 --> 0:05:28.880 want to be fucking bitchous. 0:05:29.640 --> 0:05:33.359 And I was like I love that. Wow, what do 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:33.640 you know? 0:05:33.720 --> 0:05:37.520 And he was like m I was like, ooh, this 0:05:37.560 --> 0:05:39.599 is one where she fucking his lady and then she 0:05:39.680 --> 0:05:42.200 go downstairs and she was sucking the daughter too, and 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:43.520 she just out here in the show. 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:46.560 I mean she was living player ship. I was like, ow, 0:05:46.920 --> 0:05:47.279 mind you. 0:05:47.360 --> 0:05:50.640 The only reason he started watching the show he told 0:05:50.640 --> 0:05:52.359 me a woman that he dated previously hit him up 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:55.920 and said hey, because I think he told some previous 0:05:55.960 --> 0:05:58.200 partners like I have a girlfriend now whatever. She was like, 0:05:58.240 --> 0:06:01.080 you need to watch Harlem because Kofi like uses the 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:03.720 same language like Kofe like talks to talk Boks. 0:06:03.600 --> 0:06:06.400 Which I told them. I was like, we need a 0:06:06.400 --> 0:06:07.880 polyamorous storyline. 0:06:07.920 --> 0:06:09.799 Wait, you got that out of the writer. 0:06:10.120 --> 0:06:12.839 I was like, yes, I wanted Tie to re poly 0:06:13.680 --> 0:06:15.960 but then when I read the script, I was like, oh, Okay, 0:06:16.000 --> 0:06:21.599 this this works out, yeah because it because it also 0:06:21.760 --> 0:06:25.760 gives Quinn a new thing to battle with. But yeah, 0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:28.279 when we had the after season two, we had the 0:06:28.279 --> 0:06:31.040 conversation about like what kind of things you want to see, 0:06:31.560 --> 0:06:33.279 and there were some things like meeting my family that 0:06:33.320 --> 0:06:35.680 we just didn't have time to do. But I was like, 0:06:36.000 --> 0:06:38.080 we need to talk about polyamory. So then they became 0:06:38.200 --> 0:06:40.240 curious and I was like, y'all need to read poly Secure, 0:06:40.400 --> 0:06:43.600 y'all need to read uh, the Ethical Slut and all 0:06:43.640 --> 0:06:45.919 of these things. And I was telling them about my 0:06:46.040 --> 0:06:48.840 experience and then when I read it, and I was like, okay, 0:06:49.080 --> 0:06:52.840 and I love that he was ethically thank you, non 0:06:52.960 --> 0:06:55.200 monogamous ethically. 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:59.920 So basically basically found out people were calling my nigga coke. 0:07:00.360 --> 0:07:03.440 So we could blame Harlem then for him going on 0:07:03.600 --> 0:07:07.520 the press run talking about his non monography because he 0:07:07.560 --> 0:07:09.600 did it was but maybe I don't know if he 0:07:09.720 --> 0:07:11.840 learned it there. I know that we've been seeing. So 0:07:11.960 --> 0:07:15.360 let me ask you, because your your characters are I 0:07:15.360 --> 0:07:19.400 guess somewhat similar to me, between Survival of the Thickest 0:07:20.040 --> 0:07:25.080 and Barlas Square Women Boss that right, what is that 0:07:25.120 --> 0:07:26.960 important for you to play that role, and is there 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:29.200 another role you would like to play like you or 0:07:29.240 --> 0:07:31.520 do you feel like right now you're being pigeonholed into them? 0:07:31.520 --> 0:07:35.000 I want to play everything. I can play everything here. 0:07:35.600 --> 0:07:39.440 I think this happens to be like, you know, people 0:07:39.520 --> 0:07:42.680 saw me as tie and then they felt like they 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:45.480 you know, it feels like the if you're looking for 0:07:45.560 --> 0:07:48.720 this kind of person, like you know she can do that, right, 0:07:49.000 --> 0:07:49.920 And I think. 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:51.960 But Tracy took a chance. 0:07:52.080 --> 0:07:54.440 You know, I was fresh out of grad school, you know, 0:07:54.880 --> 0:07:58.840 and so and I was doing plays right, But now 0:07:59.040 --> 0:08:02.240 it's like people don't know that I'm a stage actor 0:08:02.400 --> 0:08:05.480 first because they haven't seen that. And so it's really 0:08:05.520 --> 0:08:07.440 about like who in the industry is willing to take 0:08:07.480 --> 0:08:11.280 the chance for you to do something different? And where 0:08:11.400 --> 0:08:13.960 is it like, oh, well, we need somebody who we 0:08:14.080 --> 0:08:16.600 know can do this thing, so we're going to hire 0:08:16.640 --> 0:08:18.160 you to do that thing because we know you can 0:08:18.160 --> 0:08:18.360 do it. 0:08:18.360 --> 0:08:22.120 It's great sexual Sorry for anyone listening, Mandy and I 0:08:22.120 --> 0:08:27.800 aren't looking at each other for being queer, being whatever 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.440 you identify as, but just sexually fluid. Do you think 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:34.199 that it kind of plays up and is a plus 0:08:34.240 --> 0:08:36.280 for when you're looking for certain roles. Do you think 0:08:36.280 --> 0:08:37.720 it's a look or do you think it's actually that 0:08:37.760 --> 0:08:38.680 you live that lifestyle. 0:08:38.960 --> 0:08:39.840 I think it's both. 0:08:40.120 --> 0:08:44.120 I think so when I talked to Tracy about why 0:08:44.120 --> 0:08:47.040 I was the first one to be hired for Harlem, 0:08:47.320 --> 0:08:49.360 And when I talked to Tracy about she was like, 0:08:49.400 --> 0:08:50.680 do you know why we hired you? 0:08:50.760 --> 0:08:51.520 And I was like no. 0:08:51.920 --> 0:08:55.040 Apparently, when I came into the room for the producer session, 0:08:55.520 --> 0:08:59.559 I was flirting with their assistance, but I was so thin, 0:09:01.840 --> 0:09:04.079 I was so encaractered that I didn't notice. But they 0:09:04.160 --> 0:09:09.000 was cute, you know. I was giving them, you know, 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:11.760 a little bit longer handshakes, like you know, what's up? 0:09:11.920 --> 0:09:14.720 You look? You know what I mean. I'm not even 0:09:15.000 --> 0:09:16.839 you know, I'm not even thinking about it. 0:09:16.880 --> 0:09:19.559 And I mean before I even said the words on 0:09:19.600 --> 0:09:22.120 the page, Tracy knew, like, this is our Tie, and 0:09:22.160 --> 0:09:24.440 she thought that Tie would be the hardest person to 0:09:24.520 --> 0:09:28.600 cast because she didn't see anybody with that same aesthetic 0:09:29.320 --> 0:09:30.160 in the industry. 0:09:30.840 --> 0:09:34.600 We had the conversation with Tone about his sex scenes, 0:09:34.679 --> 0:09:38.560 and often you could hear actors talk about their heterosexual 0:09:38.600 --> 0:09:42.760 sex scenes, right, and then we've heard male actors and 0:09:42.800 --> 0:09:45.520 their uncomfortability if they're heterosexual in real life and have 0:09:45.600 --> 0:09:47.360 to play out gay scenes, what. 0:09:47.440 --> 0:09:48.280 Is it like for you? 0:09:48.320 --> 0:09:50.880 And what are the conversations between you and women that 0:09:51.000 --> 0:09:54.400 may or may not be bisexual or or lesbian and 0:09:54.440 --> 0:09:57.120 having to do gay scenes and kiss, Like, what are 0:09:57.120 --> 0:09:57.960 those scenes. 0:09:57.679 --> 0:09:58.080 Like for you? 0:09:58.120 --> 0:09:59.480 I know they're comfortable for you, but what is the 0:09:59.520 --> 0:10:02.920 conversation well with the other person that's in the scene 0:10:02.960 --> 0:10:03.160 with you. 0:10:03.280 --> 0:10:05.520 It's interesting because I have. 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:09.600 Yet to have a sex scene on screen with an 0:10:09.640 --> 0:10:13.520 actual queer person it's queer woman. Really, nobody that I've 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:16.800 been intimate with on screen has been queer. 0:10:16.840 --> 0:10:18.920 What about when you were watching did you watch Black 0:10:18.960 --> 0:10:24.000 Mirror with Raa? Yes? That made me feel like, wow, 0:10:24.080 --> 0:10:28.480 you're not gay. It makes a difference. Even a white 0:10:28.520 --> 0:10:31.200 girl was a little more. It does make a little 0:10:31.200 --> 0:10:31.880 bit of a difference. 0:10:31.880 --> 0:10:36.440 And so for me, I always have the conversation of like, hey, like, 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:39.800 let me know what makes you feel comfortable, let me 0:10:39.840 --> 0:10:43.440 know what doesn't make you feel comfortable. My interest is 0:10:43.600 --> 0:10:46.760 for this to be as authentic as possible, and so 0:10:46.800 --> 0:10:49.720 there are things that I would or would not do 0:10:50.120 --> 0:10:52.520 that Like, sometimes I watch queer sex scenes and I'm like, 0:10:52.920 --> 0:10:54.079 bro who did this? 0:10:54.720 --> 0:10:57.920 What are you doing? You know? I'm like where a 0:10:58.400 --> 0:11:00.640 strap beck didn't. 0:11:01.080 --> 0:11:04.680 Where we yet where you can maybe tell us like 0:11:05.080 --> 0:11:07.000 that you saw that's a popular scene where you're like 0:11:07.040 --> 0:11:07.960 this is fake as fun. 0:11:09.559 --> 0:11:12.680 No. But I was watching. 0:11:13.800 --> 0:11:18.400 The new generation L Word and I was like, there 0:11:18.440 --> 0:11:19.920 was a sex scene in there that I was like. 0:11:20.160 --> 0:11:22.960 Oh, okay, what made me feel like? 0:11:23.200 --> 0:11:26.200 I got to have so many conversations with myself when 0:11:26.240 --> 0:11:27.640 I was younger, yes, and. 0:11:27.679 --> 0:11:31.079 The new one fucked me up? What about it? And 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:32.160 what was the scene? 0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:34.600 It was like she was I think she was going 0:11:34.640 --> 0:11:39.120 down on her something and it just wasn't It just 0:11:39.160 --> 0:11:43.560 didn't feel it didn't feel right, Like it was like, huh, 0:11:43.640 --> 0:11:47.000 I don't know if this necessarily like maybe it was 0:11:47.040 --> 0:11:50.920 too easy or maybe there was no other component right, 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:53.480 and it just didn't feel like. 0:11:54.400 --> 0:11:57.880 It didn't feel like you know the thing. 0:11:57.720 --> 0:12:00.400 About that L word that felt real for me all 0:12:00.400 --> 0:12:03.240 the hands Like there were times where I would say 0:12:03.280 --> 0:12:04.800 I was having sex with somebody and people be like, 0:12:04.800 --> 0:12:06.839 you're not in sex sex, you're just doing this or 0:12:06.840 --> 0:12:09.160 if you're paying like, or if you're using your hands, 0:12:09.559 --> 0:12:11.400 and it would make me feel so invalidated. When I 0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:14.240 was younger, because I thought that really was sex for us. 0:12:14.600 --> 0:12:17.920 The L word was such a different viewpoint. Yes, just 0:12:17.960 --> 0:12:20.200 being able to see people call it car sex that 0:12:20.280 --> 0:12:22.840 had sex in a car with hands, Yes, it really 0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:26.319 changed it for me, just with how I presented, because 0:12:26.320 --> 0:12:27.840 I would want to do more and be like, oh, 0:12:27.880 --> 0:12:30.360 well now I need a strap just to say I fucked. 0:12:30.800 --> 0:12:36.680 No, no have Is there any scenes currently on TV 0:12:36.880 --> 0:12:40.839 where a strap has even been shown. I have advocated 0:12:41.200 --> 0:12:44.440 for the strap to be hanging up on the ball 0:12:44.760 --> 0:12:47.440 so many times they're like, so just tell me like 0:12:47.480 --> 0:12:50.200 the like the thought process behind it. The thought is 0:12:50.200 --> 0:12:52.520 that I used it and that when queer people see it, 0:12:52.760 --> 0:12:55.480 they're gonna be like, oh, okay, I'll see. 0:12:55.280 --> 0:12:55.920 What you did there. 0:12:55.960 --> 0:12:58.160 You know, it's it's a little bit of a level 0:12:58.200 --> 0:13:01.000 of recognition, even if you don't have to see me 0:13:01.720 --> 0:13:06.000 putting it on, you know, just that they bumping cheese, right. 0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:08.960 I enjoy that, But I'm not doing that all the 0:13:09.040 --> 0:13:09.880 time my days. 0:13:09.960 --> 0:13:12.720 In my closet, does your say on your headport? 0:13:13.679 --> 0:13:14.400 Where do you put it? 0:13:14.480 --> 0:13:16.400 I have a basket okay, yeah, I have a bag 0:13:16.760 --> 0:13:18.480 sizes same same. 0:13:18.559 --> 0:13:19.160 I just showed. 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:21.320 I just showed my boyfriend one that I have, and 0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:23.760 he was like, it was King Noirs. 0:13:24.000 --> 0:13:29.480 He was like, no, okay, it was oh no, let me, 0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:30.280 let me tell you. 0:13:30.360 --> 0:13:32.400 I don't even know if I shared this on on 0:13:32.440 --> 0:13:33.920 a podcast yet. 0:13:34.160 --> 0:13:35.720 His parents live in Europe. 0:13:36.080 --> 0:13:38.400 So he just got me a refrigerator from my room 0:13:38.400 --> 0:13:40.320 because I live upstairs and downstairs and I'll be tired 0:13:40.360 --> 0:13:41.920 and lazy and don't want to go downstairs beet water. 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:45.880 So he's showing his dad the little refrigerator. 0:13:49.040 --> 0:13:52.960 There was a dildo, a white glass and condoms on 0:13:53.040 --> 0:13:56.439 top of the fridge and he's he was like, oh wow, 0:13:57.679 --> 0:13:59.920 y'all were And so he had to tell me that 0:14:00.200 --> 0:14:05.760 his dad saw the fucking dildo on the goddamn motherfucking refrigerator. 0:14:05.840 --> 0:14:08.439 And it was funny. And I was gay gay. My 0:14:08.480 --> 0:14:11.160 mom saw everything. Girl was a little too much. There 0:14:11.240 --> 0:14:13.760 was a suction cup dildo I had that I would 0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:16.760 hang necklaces on. She was gay gay. I just have 0:14:16.800 --> 0:14:17.040 a man. 0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:21.640 Now I've been making jokes. Now I'm just half gay. 0:14:22.040 --> 0:14:24.120 So no, and I was gay, My mom was. 0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:28.080 She was almost so overwhelmed she used the dilto to 0:14:28.200 --> 0:14:29.200 hang necklaces on. 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:31.000 It was just I had so many at that point 0:14:31.040 --> 0:14:32.480 it was just fun. So I stuck one on the wall. 0:14:32.560 --> 0:14:35.040 The necklace is there, and she came into my house 0:14:35.320 --> 0:14:36.479 and she said. 0:14:37.440 --> 0:14:39.800 You guys are balls to no balls. 0:14:41.680 --> 0:14:43.640 And I think the questions that she had were so 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:48.080 interesting because she wanted to know so much how I 0:14:48.280 --> 0:14:53.560 wasn't missing anything, like I was dating women for most 0:14:53.600 --> 0:14:56.000 of my life, but only her. She was just like 0:14:56.480 --> 0:14:58.360 and I could tell my mom would have three little 0:14:58.400 --> 0:15:03.600 vod because he's sitting there sap. It was very difficult 0:15:03.600 --> 0:15:05.040 for me to talk about it with her. And I 0:15:05.120 --> 0:15:08.040 think it's because talking about men with a woman that's straight, 0:15:08.480 --> 0:15:09.080 it's easy. 0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:12.640 But like, oh, yet I have yet to talk to 0:15:12.720 --> 0:15:15.520 my mom about being with women, even though I be 0:15:15.560 --> 0:15:18.680 fucking women. And what's crazy is my experience with a 0:15:18.760 --> 0:15:21.720 strap is I've only been strapped once by a woman, 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:24.440 my ex girlfriend when I lived in Miami, and bitch, 0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:28.240 I do this strapping only on men, so like, my. 0:15:29.400 --> 0:15:32.080 Oh, you know what I mean. So my experience with 0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:33.720 that is that. 0:15:33.800 --> 0:15:37.440 And I love that you, as an actress who can 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:42.080 be so vocal for representation on screen, is able to 0:15:42.120 --> 0:15:45.920 try to at least advocate for these little subtleties of 0:15:46.080 --> 0:15:49.320 what our life really looks like in real life but 0:15:49.440 --> 0:15:52.000 also on the paper, because I think even when I'm 0:15:52.040 --> 0:15:54.560 seeing them acting it out, there's ways in which we 0:15:54.680 --> 0:15:58.320 talk women to women that's different than heterosexual relationships as well. 0:15:58.720 --> 0:15:59.920 So I just love that. 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:02.920 I know we talked a lot about Harlem. But what 0:16:02.960 --> 0:16:05.400 was it like working with Tasha Smith? 0:16:05.480 --> 0:16:05.640 Right? 0:16:06.000 --> 0:16:09.760 Yes, Tasha is great, Tasha is funny, and all of 0:16:09.800 --> 0:16:12.000 our aunties have been that for our whole lives. 0:16:12.240 --> 0:16:13.840 Yeah, how was that? You know? 0:16:13.920 --> 0:16:17.240 She came into the room, like, why y'all know we 0:16:17.360 --> 0:16:19.560 about to do this hairset scene. 0:16:19.280 --> 0:16:21.840 And she got her little wrong that she you know 0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:22.360 what I mean. 0:16:23.080 --> 0:16:24.840 But then you know, when we're in the back, she said, 0:16:24.920 --> 0:16:26.480 but you're gonna have to tell me, right, you know, 0:16:26.480 --> 0:16:28.240 you're gonna have to let me know. And so she 0:16:28.320 --> 0:16:31.640 went and she got over me, and I'm like, we 0:16:31.680 --> 0:16:33.920 ain't even get there yet. You know, we gotta you 0:16:33.920 --> 0:16:36.120 pull up the leg, you know, you gotta make sure 0:16:36.160 --> 0:16:38.840 the puzzle pieces work right so that it looks like, 0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:41.720 you know, we really going there, and maybe y'all slide down, 0:16:41.800 --> 0:16:43.600 you know, so I can get up in there. Because 0:16:43.640 --> 0:16:46.640 it's supposed to be like such a such. 0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:48.120 A beautiful experience. 0:16:48.200 --> 0:16:52.040 For her that she gets so emotionally overwhelmed that she 0:16:52.160 --> 0:16:55.920 has to leave. And so I'm like, we want I 0:16:56.080 --> 0:16:59.520 want also the audience to feel like, oh, I know 0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:00.000 what happened. 0:17:00.240 --> 0:17:00.960 You know what I mean? 0:17:01.240 --> 0:17:04.359 Even if we can't show everything, we have to do 0:17:04.440 --> 0:17:05.080 a little bit of the. 0:17:05.119 --> 0:17:09.240 New battling with her sexuality essentially, right, it's. 0:17:09.119 --> 0:17:14.080 Her battling with power really, like not wanting, not wanting 0:17:14.119 --> 0:17:17.840 to be vulnerable enough to like let a person see you, 0:17:17.920 --> 0:17:20.400 know when you have that good set you like who 0:17:20.440 --> 0:17:24.119 I just want to cry and hug you and keep 0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:26.359 you and all of this stuff. And I have to 0:17:26.400 --> 0:17:28.359 go because I don't know where to put these emotions. 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:31.400 And so I think it's more about like the emotional 0:17:31.720 --> 0:17:34.760 arc of Marley always being the one who can put 0:17:34.760 --> 0:17:38.159 her energetic dick on the table, who can pay for 0:17:38.280 --> 0:17:39.520 whatever needs to be paid for. 0:17:39.880 --> 0:17:42.560 And now she's meeting this woman who is not only. 0:17:42.400 --> 0:17:46.760 Beautiful and smart and has her own funds, She's gonna 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:47.720 fuck you Lood too. 0:17:49.119 --> 0:17:53.359 How do you how do you differentiate as a person 0:17:53.440 --> 0:17:54.679 from the characters you've played. 0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:58.400 I feel like ty Is. I feel like maybe both 0:17:58.440 --> 0:18:00.159 of the characters are lesbian. I don't know in the 0:18:00.200 --> 0:18:04.920 fire as a lesson. I'm gender fluid and sexually fluid. 0:18:05.000 --> 0:18:09.880 You know, I will dig. 0:18:10.240 --> 0:18:16.640 But but I think I think also there is a 0:18:16.760 --> 0:18:22.000 lack of emotional availability with Tie, Like there is a 0:18:22.000 --> 0:18:26.560 lot of family trauma there that just doesn't allow her 0:18:27.119 --> 0:18:30.800 to have the courage enough to go deep. And I'm 0:18:30.840 --> 0:18:33.159 a person like I lay it all out on the table, 0:18:33.320 --> 0:18:35.160 like I want you to know what you're getting into, 0:18:36.119 --> 0:18:39.240 so that you don't say, like, oh, well, I thought 0:18:40.119 --> 0:18:42.600 you don't show up with a representative basically. 0:18:42.240 --> 0:18:45.480 And some bitches want Ties. Are you from New York? 0:18:45.960 --> 0:18:51.480 I'm from Philly, Okay, cousin, you know Georgia, I'm. 0:18:51.320 --> 0:18:54.200 From Philly, But it is you know, it was giving 0:18:54.280 --> 0:18:59.199 that and the Philly you know they give that and so. 0:18:59.320 --> 0:19:00.960 But but I think also. 0:19:02.119 --> 0:19:06.240 Tie wants that type of like love and connection but 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:08.960 also doesn't know how to get it because she's not 0:19:09.040 --> 0:19:12.440 living truthfully to her family. And that was a big thing, 0:19:12.560 --> 0:19:21.120 Like people in my family know, was it. 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:25.439 Easy for you to express like being that you're gender 0:19:25.440 --> 0:19:29.479 fluid sexually fluid? Was that easier to quote unquote come 0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:32.040 out to your family about so? 0:19:32.119 --> 0:19:35.720 I so my mom she passed away in twenty nineteen. 0:19:36.200 --> 0:19:38.920 It was she was she was ready to go. 0:19:39.280 --> 0:19:41.520 But my mom was the. 0:19:41.440 --> 0:19:45.959 First hole I ever met space on it Jotty back Cooper. 0:19:48.240 --> 0:19:51.600 She was before the hot girls were popular. It was 0:19:51.600 --> 0:19:55.160 a hot girl sad just kind of I kind of know. 0:19:55.480 --> 0:19:57.160 Our children say, I love that. 0:19:57.240 --> 0:20:00.320 Probably first off we say we is hold reddit Harry 0:20:00.359 --> 0:20:03.959