Speaker 1: Hey, I do Part two.
Speaker 2: It's your celebrity mentor Deanna Pappas and I'm joined today
Speaker 2: by my favorite real life single gal, Luise Hi. We
Speaker 2: have to jump right in because we have got to
Speaker 2: talk about the hottest trend this summer.
Speaker 3: Listen to this forget Brat's summer. That's so twenty twenty four.
Speaker 3: The wedding bands are coming off, and hot divorce Summer
Speaker 3: is heating up. Hot Divorce Summer has moved from social
Speaker 3: feeds to storefronts. High profile divorce attorney Laura Wasser joined
Speaker 3: forces with Reformation to launch the divorce collection, River Island
Speaker 3: released a guide for the trend, Twisted Tea launched a
Speaker 3: new breakup themed split pack, and even Netflix now has
Speaker 3: a Hot Divorce Summer section with movies and shows that
Speaker 3: fit the part. The new trend might help some realize
Speaker 3: happily ever After has less to do with finding Prince
Speaker 3: Charming and more to do with finding yourself.
Speaker 2: I kind of had a little giggle when I first
Speaker 2: heard this because I was like, Ugh, here we go,
Speaker 2: but also was like, yeah, I feel this a lot,
Speaker 2: Like I don't know that I'm like globe trotting and
Speaker 2: being like, oh, I'm living my best divorce life.
Speaker 1: Everybody look at me.
Speaker 2: But I definitely think that I have found myself again
Speaker 2: through divorce, you know.
Speaker 1: I mean that, like just as a soul woman.
Speaker 2: You know, leaving partnering aside, just as a sole woman,
Speaker 2: like finding myself in life again and getting to know
Speaker 2: who I am again, you know, at this point, after
Speaker 2: what was truly one of the one of the most
Speaker 2: difficult times of my entire life. Luis, let's pause for
Speaker 2: just a second. I'm going to bring in my friend
Speaker 2: and former Bachelor alum, Courtney Robertson Fun.
Speaker 4: Hi.
Speaker 2: Hi, look so beautiful Courtney. This is my friend Louise.
Speaker 5: She is nice to meet you.
Speaker 2: She's our single lady here and we are currently talking
Speaker 2: about this hot divorce summer.
Speaker 1: So Louise and I were just getting into it.
Speaker 2: I kind of shared where I was at, and then
Speaker 2: Louise was just about to tell me that she has
Speaker 2: living her best life.
Speaker 4: Well, I've been living my best life for about ten
Speaker 4: years now, and I have to tell you, once you
Speaker 4: experience this life, it's kind of hard to go back
Speaker 4: to what we were all dealing with unless we are
Speaker 4: with the unicorn. And as somebody who has older kids
Speaker 4: and kids who are out of the house and launched
Speaker 4: in post college. All of my friends are divorced and
Speaker 4: we have a great time. And I have to tell you,
Speaker 4: two of my friends just went through divorce and I
Speaker 4: just sold them building units in my building and we're
Speaker 4: creating Melrose Place up and down.
Speaker 5: It is like a modern day sorority. It's so much fun.
Speaker 2: That is, it's so much fun. I feel like I
Speaker 2: am having like fomo. Is that still a thing? I'm
Speaker 2: still having fomo.
Speaker 5: I can find you something here, don't.
Speaker 4: I'm a real turn But you know the truth is
Speaker 4: is to your point about what you said, So much
Speaker 4: of it is the energy and the aura and what
Speaker 4: you're feeling about yourself is what we're actually emitting off
Speaker 4: to everybody. Right, So the hot girl concept, hot divorce
Speaker 4: concept is almost a byproduct of what we're feeling on
Speaker 4: the inside, which is radiating off of us.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally agree.
Speaker 2: I think that people can people can see you coming
Speaker 2: from a mile away if they can see your confidence
Speaker 2: and your joy and your happiness, like that stuff bleeds
Speaker 2: through all aspects of your life.
Speaker 1: Cornea know that.
Speaker 2: You're just beginning to join us on this side of civilization.
Speaker 2: So tell us where you're at with your hot girl
Speaker 2: divorce summer.
Speaker 6: Well, I'm hot. It's one hundred and fifteen dec. It's
Speaker 6: been hot, no, like.
Speaker 1: Literally hot, literally she's smoking.
Speaker 6: I think I'm parimuntal and it's in Arizona. It's so hot.
Speaker 6: I just got a new residence and my divorce isn't
Speaker 6: final yet, so it doesn't feel I don't know, like
Speaker 6: I just learned about hot girl divorce summer. But I
Speaker 6: will say that I have lost some weight. I love
Speaker 6: a good breakup diet. And I've had more time because
Speaker 6: I'm splitting time with the kids now, so I have
Speaker 6: had more time to focus on Oh, you know what,
Speaker 6: I'm gonna go get my hair done. I'm gonna get
Speaker 6: my nails done. And there has been in the back
Speaker 6: of my mind like I need a glow up, you know.
Speaker 6: But my energy is getting stronger every day. I love
Speaker 6: that you talked about energy and your aura. And you know,
Speaker 6: I took my ring off and I've been going out
Speaker 6: in public and I'm like, oh my gosh, guys are
Speaker 6: checking me out, like somebody might hit on me, which
Speaker 6: I'm not looking for that. But I love the idea
Speaker 6: of your Melrose Place, living your best life with your
Speaker 6: your girlfriends. Because the more people that I talk to
Speaker 6: that are divorced are like, this is the.
Speaker 4: Best, it's the best way. I think I'm way ahead
Speaker 4: of you. I have to tell you, guys.
Speaker 1: We're like in the three stages of divorce here.
Speaker 5: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: We literally all we do is talk about all the
Speaker 4: losers we go out with. Okay, one woman's trash sometimes
Speaker 4: it's mostly not another woman's treasure. Yeah, we have so
Speaker 4: many stories we like rehash. We go on girls trips
Speaker 4: all the time. We're going next week a group of
Speaker 4: us to Vegas and we actually did divorce trips.
Speaker 5: I mean, it's really fun.
Speaker 6: This sounds like a reality show waiting to happen.
Speaker 5: I promise you.
Speaker 4: And here's the thing in life, as you guys know,
Speaker 4: as one door closes, other amazing doors open, right and
Speaker 4: we don't know what's coming, but we have to look
Speaker 4: at it. Life is happening for us, not to us.
Speaker 4: It's an opportunity and it's all about our lens. And
Speaker 4: I promise you, Courtney, as you're newer to this, you
Speaker 4: are going to hindsight twenty twenty and think divorce, as
Speaker 4: painful as it was, two happy homes is better than
Speaker 4: one unhappy home for all of our children, and for
Speaker 4: the kids to see us happy and thriving is everything, right.
Speaker 4: And I promise you you are going to remember this
Speaker 4: conversation and you are going to be the happiest person.
Speaker 5: I promise you.
Speaker 2: You know, I was just having this conversation with a
Speaker 2: friend of mine and just piggybacking on celebrating divorce. You know, Courtney,
Speaker 2: I know you and I have had many conversations about this,
Speaker 2: and one most recently when we were together in Tahoe.
Speaker 1: But there are phases of this, right.
Speaker 2: You will go down, and you will feel that so
Speaker 2: much over the coming years, but there is a part
Speaker 2: where you truly at least what I experienced once I
Speaker 2: got through some of those really high highs and the
Speaker 2: very very low lows, is that I truly began to
Speaker 2: celebrate myself again. I see so much stuff on social
Speaker 2: media and other clips and other podcasts of women talking
Speaker 2: about we're now living in a culture.
Speaker 1: Where we no longer need men, right.
Speaker 2: I think that as I was growing up, it was
Speaker 2: like I was taught, Okay, you go to school, you
Speaker 2: go to college, you get married, you have children, And
Speaker 2: that was what my life was, and I did those things,
Speaker 2: not necessarily so strictly, but I believe that we live
Speaker 2: in a world, in a generation right now, where that's
Speaker 2: not the way women are going. We provide for ourselves,
Speaker 2: and I am speaking for myself. I am a single
Speaker 2: woman raising two children, and what should be a dual income.
Speaker 1: Place that I put a roof over our heads.
Speaker 2: I buy our groceries, I buy their clothes, I pay
Speaker 2: for things we go on vacation.
Speaker 1: I'm doing it.
Speaker 2: I'm paying the water bill and the electricity bill and
Speaker 2: all of this stuff. I am finding joy and peace
Speaker 2: in my own So tell me why I need to
Speaker 2: date a man.
Speaker 5: It has to be additive.
Speaker 4: If it's not additive, your life is filled, right. I
Speaker 4: have my career, I have my family, I have my friends,
Speaker 4: I have my kids. I have the stuff I like
Speaker 4: to do on my own. So unless it's literally going
Speaker 4: to completely make my life that much more valuable by
Speaker 4: him being a slice of it, because he's never going
Speaker 4: to be twenty four to seven like it was when
Speaker 4: we first got married and we were having children. Right,
Speaker 4: We're way too evolved now as individuals and with all
Speaker 4: the different seasons and life transitions, and when your kids
Speaker 4: get older, you'll see the whole empty nesting thing is
Speaker 4: a whole different thing.
Speaker 5: And then not having a husband.
Speaker 4: You really have to reinvent yourself in terms of, you know,
Speaker 4: filling your dance card again.
Speaker 1: I think that I.
Speaker 2: Am truly okay with that and finding someone that kind
Speaker 2: of comes in and lifts you from a better place.
Speaker 2: You know. I don't know if I just have really
Speaker 2: bad luck or if I'm looking for love in all
Speaker 2: the wrong places, but I've only met men who would
Speaker 2: like to do their laundry in my home or like
Speaker 2: borrow twenty dollars.
Speaker 1: Like I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but.
Speaker 2: I am not getting hit on in the broccoli section
Speaker 2: at the Whole Foods?
Speaker 1: What am I not doing right?
Speaker 2: As a personal you know, as a person, as a woman,
Speaker 2: I am living my best life and feel more aligned
Speaker 2: than I ever have. But when it comes to dating
Speaker 2: and partnership, are my needs my desires for when I
Speaker 2: want in a partnership to hie or what am I
Speaker 2: not doing right?
Speaker 6: I think, Dan, I've known you for a long time.
Speaker 6: I'm a very strong, independent woman, and I don't know
Speaker 6: that you need a man. I don't know that you're
Speaker 6: you know, you talk about energy and stuff. I don't
Speaker 6: know that you want that. I don't do you do
Speaker 6: you want a party?
Speaker 4: I do? Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think that as humans human nature, we crave intimacy
Speaker 2: and partnership, and I do crave those things. But I
Speaker 2: guess that my bar has jumped so high that I'm
Speaker 2: not sure anybody will ever be able to meet.
Speaker 1: That, you know, physical needs aside.
Speaker 2: I'd really like to have safety in a relationship and
Speaker 2: a man that I feel safe with, you know, to
Speaker 2: be myself, to never be too much you know what
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 6: Oh, that's a terrible feeling, because don't you want to
Speaker 6: just be able to be one hundred percent yourself.
Speaker 5: They're not the right person if they're making you feel that.
Speaker 1: You're too much.
Speaker 6: Louis, I mean you said, like, unless there's a unicorn,
Speaker 6: have you stumbled across any unicorns in your dating experience?
Speaker 4: I have dated a lot of amazing guys, and I
Speaker 4: can tell you that as I have done a lot
Speaker 4: of work on myself right because these years alone are
Speaker 4: opportunities to be constantly improving and becoming the best version
Speaker 4: of ourselves. So basically we attract where we think we
Speaker 4: are in our lives, right, and it gets better and better.
Speaker 4: And sure we have default you know, kind of go
Speaker 4: to reactions and behaviors, but I can tell you that
Speaker 4: as I have gotten, as I've worked out my edges
Speaker 4: that needed to be worked out, the level of people
Speaker 4: that I have met and been involved with obviously not
Speaker 4: the final destination.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 4: I'm not remarried because it has to feel so right,
Speaker 4: and I have to feel truly like safe and like
Speaker 4: I'm ready to give up a lot of these amazing,
Speaker 4: you know kind of moments in my life to really
Speaker 4: lean into somebody. I haven't found that person yet, but
Speaker 4: there's been plenty of people that are really really good people,
Speaker 4: and I'm grateful for it, and I'm grateful for all
Speaker 4: the different experiences I have, right because you know, when
Speaker 4: we first, you know, we're young, and we all have
Speaker 4: this plan of our fairy tale, get married, have kids
Speaker 4: like we all did, right yea, And basically you know
Speaker 4: that fairy tale ended for a lot of us.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 4: Every time I tell my children and somebody's getting divorced,
Speaker 4: they like look at me like I'm crazy, because doesn't
Speaker 4: everybody get divorced. I mean, how sad right that that's
Speaker 4: what they're you know, they're kind of floor that they're
Speaker 4: starting from. But you there's so many different ways to
Speaker 4: grow in this chapter, right and I will tell you
Speaker 4: to the point of Hot Divorce Girls summer is I
Speaker 4: look at most of my married friends and they're fing miserable.
Speaker 5: Okay, I don't want to be anyone of them. Let
Speaker 5: me take I go to dinner with my friends.
Speaker 4: I can spend what I want, drink what I want,
Speaker 4: come home, why to whatever show I want in the
Speaker 4: middle of the night, I don't.
Speaker 5: Have to answer to anybody.
Speaker 2: It's that kind of stuff right there, Luise that I'm like,
Speaker 2: why would I ever be in another relationship.
Speaker 5: Unless it is so amazing? But I'll tell you what
Speaker 5: you have to be careful for.
Speaker 4: As we get more and more comfortable and very you know,
Speaker 4: enjoying our lives, it does make it, to your point,
Speaker 4: that much harder to make rooms.
Speaker 5: So what happens is is you know, it's it's got
Speaker 5: to be really, I don't know you'll know it.
Speaker 4: I guess I haven't known it yet, But I have
Speaker 4: a great life, Like my plan tonight with my friends.
Speaker 4: I just got back from Europe with a group of girlfriends.
Speaker 4: I mean, we're going to New York in the fall.
Speaker 4: I mean it's like I can't even schedule, you know, dates,
Speaker 4: because I'm busy traveling with my friends.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, you are living your hot divorce a
Speaker 2: summer like you legit are like living it for us.
Speaker 4: But I also don't have kids at home, so I'm
Speaker 4: a bright step ahead of you. But it's not just
Speaker 4: hot divorce summer, guys. It's hot divorce all the time.
Speaker 4: It doesn't act in the summer. The only difference is
Speaker 4: you're wearing leather pants.
Speaker 5: You're not wearing a miniver. Do you see what I'm saying?
Speaker 4: And the truth is is, here's the sad thing. I
Speaker 4: don't know about you where you live in Arizona, but
Speaker 4: I know where you and I live. When does anybody
Speaker 4: approach a table and send drinks over?
Speaker 1: Not ever.
Speaker 6: I lived in la for fifteen years. I did the
Speaker 6: actor thing. I've dated some incredible men, really incredible men.
Speaker 6: I've had the fun in the twenties, the thirties, getting serious.
Speaker 6: The dating apps. Do you do dating apps?
Speaker 2: I have done dating apps, but I am telling you
Speaker 2: I never get hit on in the wild.
Speaker 1: I don't know why I have.
Speaker 2: A misting bitch face if I do not look approachable.
Speaker 2: I try to make eye contact. I try to smile.
Speaker 2: I try to make sure they see that there's no
Speaker 2: jewelry on my left hand. No, I do not get
Speaker 2: hit on. I don't get slid into my DMS or
Speaker 2: whatever it is the sliding.
Speaker 1: I don't get any of that. I get nothing. I
Speaker 1: get absolutely nothing.
Speaker 6: To change that into. Now watch you just said that,
Speaker 6: and it's like it's gonna just start happening.
Speaker 1: No, I put it out there, Courtney.
Speaker 5: No, I'm gonna change it for you.
Speaker 6: Were you thinking the same thing?
Speaker 5: No, I have to tell you I tried this this week.
Speaker 5: You're gonna think I'm crazy.
Speaker 6: No, I love a little woo woo.
Speaker 4: Oh.
Speaker 5: Nobody's more woo woo than me. I mean, come, you
Speaker 5: should see the.
Speaker 4: Crystals and the eleven elevens and dame. I mean my
Speaker 4: kids wear an eleven eleven. Now, it's like it's our family,
Speaker 4: you know, yes?
Speaker 5: Right? Anyways, So I.
Speaker 4: Was watching a TikTok and what the TikTok was saying was,
Speaker 4: if you're if you're out or you're at dinner, you're
Speaker 4: supposed to like touch your.
Speaker 6: Neck like the diessential or something.
Speaker 4: And when I was doing it, so God came up
Speaker 4: to be and talk to me.
Speaker 1: I was like, this is working, so you have to
Speaker 1: do that.
Speaker 4: Start like sitting there and just being like touching yourself, Like.
Speaker 2: I don't know what okay, So I did something similar.
Speaker 1: I had to admit. It has to feel somewhat.
Speaker 2: I guess natural to who I am, and I would
Speaker 2: tell you most of my life I have been the
Speaker 2: type of girl who always waits for the man to
Speaker 2: make the move.
Speaker 1: I have just always. I'm from the South, I have
Speaker 1: I believe.
Speaker 2: In very Jewry is not dead. I know, I know,
Speaker 2: but it's not working in my favor. I hope that
Speaker 2: like my hot girl summer looks like if I see
Speaker 2: a cute guy, that I would have the courage to
Speaker 2: go up and be like, oh my God, hi, Like
Speaker 2: I don't even know.
Speaker 1: What I would say.
Speaker 2: I don't think I have like game. I'm in Hawaii
Speaker 2: for work and I was just leaving the beach and
Speaker 2: i was walking and I'm just living my best life.
Speaker 2: I'm so happy. I was meditating and praying by the
Speaker 2: ocean and I'm smiling and I'm walking back, and I
Speaker 2: saw this man walk past me and he smiled and
Speaker 2: we made eye contact and I smiled back. And the
Speaker 2: whole way is I'm walking away. I thought, Oh, I
Speaker 2: hope he comes and approaches me, because I didn't have
Speaker 2: the guts to turn around and be like, oh my,
Speaker 2: did we have a moment like I didn't have the
Speaker 2: guts to do it. But the whole way up, I thought,
Speaker 2: oh God, if this is meant for me, let it
Speaker 2: find me, you know.
Speaker 1: And if it's not, then it won't.
Speaker 4: It'll drop in your lap when it's supposed to. I
Speaker 4: promise you, the universe is listening.
Speaker 5: It happens. I'll sit there and all of a sudden,
Speaker 5: it'll be like I'll be down or whatever.
Speaker 4: I'll just talk to the universe and randomly I'll get
Speaker 4: a call for a setup. I'm just saying, it's all
Speaker 4: about that energy. But one thing you could do is
Speaker 4: if you do you have a guy best friend.
Speaker 6: I do. Mine's actually here in town helping me move.
Speaker 6: I have a lot of guy friends that I actually
Speaker 6: didn't talk to while I was married, that I've reconnected with.
Speaker 6: And I told I was I'm sorry if i I'm
Speaker 6: just going to jump in here. I just had lunch
Speaker 6: with my family members today and they're like, how are
Speaker 6: you doing. I'm in that phase where everyone's like, you know, worried,
Speaker 6: and I'm like, I'm sad, I'm mad, I'm grieving. The
Speaker 6: kids are resilient, and I said, I don't ever want
Speaker 6: to get married again. And I know, Diana, you have
Speaker 6: felt that way before. But I have guy friends that
Speaker 6: help me out with things. We go to beautiful dinners,
Speaker 6: they're attractive, We talk about their dating lives and that
Speaker 6: sort of thing.
Speaker 5: And that's my point.
Speaker 4: It's what I think is really good is sometimes I
Speaker 4: have a guy best friend and I'll say to him,
Speaker 4: what am I giving off?
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, they'll tell you because.
Speaker 5: They tell you so, Deanna.
Speaker 4: So maybe if you think you're giving off, resting bitch, please.
Speaker 2: I just asked this guy who is a close friend
Speaker 2: of mine. I was like, is something on? Is something
Speaker 2: wrong with my face?
Speaker 1: Is this why?
Speaker 2: And he said, no, you're just too hot. And guys
Speaker 2: won't approach a woman who's too hot because they think
Speaker 2: you're taken. And I was like, wave that, Okay, I
Speaker 2: don't think that I'm just too hot. I don't think
Speaker 2: I'm unattractive, but I would never label myself as I'm
Speaker 2: just so hot that I'm unapproachable.
Speaker 1: But like, what should I cut my hair off?
Speaker 7: Like?
Speaker 1: What should I do?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 6: Do not cut things?
Speaker 5: But never so hair off.
Speaker 6: You're in Hawaii, that's not geographically desirable, and I because
Speaker 6: you live in LA.
Speaker 1: But a lot of people come here from.
Speaker 6: LA to hang out and visit I and you were
Speaker 6: saying that you would never You're old school. I have been,
Speaker 6: especially when I was single, like I just will start
Speaker 6: talking to everybody. I was raised that way. My mom
Speaker 6: was like, you know, we talked to the butcher the
Speaker 6: floor is but I would say, like I be brave.
Speaker 1: Well I'm laughing.
Speaker 2: I'm laughing because our producer Heather just sent me a message,
Speaker 2: who is also single, mind you, and said you should.
Speaker 7: Just go up and say hey nice, sure, No, No,
Speaker 7: what you should do is when you feel, like, for example,
Speaker 7: on the beach, that you wanted to say, hey, do
Speaker 7: we just have a moment and you just opted not
Speaker 7: to because of fear or whatever, you have to say
Speaker 7: to yourself, I am going to.
Speaker 4: Practice opposite action, and you're going to have to force
Speaker 4: yourself to do something different because if you want a different.
Speaker 5: Result, you have to be different.
Speaker 4: If you want change, you have to change, right, because
Speaker 4: if we do everything the same, we're just going to
Speaker 4: get the same result. So if it's not working, what's
Speaker 4: the worse that happens? Did we have a moment?
Speaker 5: No? Okay, Yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Don't think I'm scared of that.
Speaker 2: I think I'm stuck in that mentality that I want
Speaker 2: I want a man to do that part. I think
Speaker 2: I am in that mentality where I take charge and
Speaker 2: I lead in almost every single aspect of my life.
Speaker 2: I am a boss, and I think this is the
Speaker 2: one place where I would love it if a man
Speaker 2: was able to be a man. I said this in
Speaker 2: our last podcast, Courtney, I need to be outmanned.
Speaker 1: I need to be outmanned.
Speaker 4: If you're just using it as the dialogue to start
Speaker 4: a conversation, it's not like you're saying, hey, let's go out,
Speaker 4: Oh hey, let me buy your dinner, oh hey, let
Speaker 4: me text you after the date to say great date.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not doing those things.
Speaker 6: Say. I use humor as like a flirt, like flirting,
Speaker 6: like I I think I'm pretty good at it. I'd
Speaker 6: be like, hey, cutie, where are you from what's your name,
Speaker 6: what's your side?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 6: I would, But I mean it's also just like you
Speaker 6: could brighten somebody else's day by engaging with them. We
Speaker 6: live in a society where everybody's walking around, they're on
Speaker 6: their phones. I do think men have so many options
Speaker 6: these days, with all these dating apps and my single
Speaker 6: guy friends and what I've heard about these dating apps,
Speaker 6: what is out there is wild? My mind is blown.
Speaker 6: But if you want that old school interaction, I get it.
Speaker 6: You want that. I think that it's out there, but
Speaker 6: maybe you're not hanging in out the right places.
Speaker 2: I mean, well, it's hard because I will tell you
Speaker 2: I am not hanging out at the right places. If
Speaker 2: I get forty eight hours at home alone without my children,
Speaker 2: what am I doing?
Speaker 5: You guys?
Speaker 2: Relax, doing laundry, I'm catching up on sleep, I'm binging
Speaker 2: a good show on Netflix.
Speaker 1: And I'm ordering takeout.
Speaker 2: I am not going out to be seen like so,
Speaker 2: I'm also complaining. I'm not complaining about being alone. I
Speaker 2: love my life and I feel very joyful and full
Speaker 2: in pretty much almost every aspect. But I am also
Speaker 2: not I'm not opening up that part of me either.
Speaker 2: When I get free time away from my kids. I
Speaker 2: am rebooting me because I know when the kids come back,
Speaker 2: I've got to be back at one hundred percent mom.
Speaker 2: So I don't know that our savior is going to
Speaker 2: be dropping someone at my front door while I'm in
Speaker 2: my pjs and eating my tie takeout.
Speaker 4: Do you have a crew of divorce friends to go out?
Speaker 5: Okay? I do?
Speaker 1: I do, I do, But I'm not so sure.
Speaker 2: My children would like for me to live my best
Speaker 2: divorce a life. And I love that we're doing this
Speaker 2: today because Corty's kids are really really young.
Speaker 1: Mine are somewhere right.
Speaker 2: In the middle, and Luisa sounds like yours are older
Speaker 2: and are out of the house.
Speaker 4: They went to college and they said, this is what
Speaker 4: they said to me. Meanwhile, my ex husband's had a
Speaker 4: girlfriend forever. Okay, and I literally when I had my kids,
Speaker 4: I was all in and I didn't bring them around anything.
Speaker 5: I lived very compartmentalized.
Speaker 4: But when they both went to college, it was like
Speaker 4: they didn't want to worry about me anymore. They go, well,
Speaker 4: you did a great job, now go get yourself married.
Speaker 4: Other it's we don't want to worry about you, but
Speaker 4: you did a great job, and we're ready to support
Speaker 4: you now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm at that phase.
Speaker 2: And I know, Courtney, all of this is still so
Speaker 2: new to you. So I'm really eager to hear what
Speaker 2: your your best life looks like this summer as you are,
Speaker 2: as you are entering all aspects of divorce.
Speaker 6: But like, yeah, like I'll feel better once it's finalized.
Speaker 6: And you know it's going to take more time. But
Speaker 6: I've been separated since June, and I was like so
Speaker 6: excited and my heart is open to Like I said,
Speaker 6: I'll never get married again. But my primary focus is
Speaker 6: I have a six year old, almost five year old
Speaker 6: and a two year old. I have a new house, nesting,
Speaker 6: getting it set up, like you're sitting paying your own bills.
Speaker 6: I got just internet so I can stream my shows.
Speaker 6: But I've just been realizing I just want to do
Speaker 6: beautiful dinner parties. I want to surround myself with really
Speaker 6: interesting people when my batteries are full. And I'm a
Speaker 6: boss too. I have my podcast and I got some
Speaker 6: citing things in the works. I you know, I am
Speaker 6: not and we talked about this in Tahoe. I am
Speaker 6: not the person to just be a stay at home mom.
Speaker 6: I basically did it for a year with my baby
Speaker 6: and I was going crazy. So I don't know. I
Speaker 6: just I don't know if I'm going to be dating
Speaker 6: anytime soon. I've definitely had some options, but it just
Speaker 6: feels a little bit too soon. I'm still in like
Speaker 6: the healing rebuilding phase. Yeah, but I'm also not saying no, you.
Speaker 2: Know, okay, So run this out for me then, because
Speaker 2: I'm sorry if that was disjointed, it's I just haven't
Speaker 2: really no.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 2: I think that that's super helpful because I think that everybody,
Speaker 2: you know, the people out there listening to this podcast too,
Speaker 2: I do part two. You know, everyone is in a
Speaker 2: different place, right. Some people are just starting out. Some
Speaker 2: people are like me where they're like in the groove
Speaker 2: of things, and some people are like Luis where they
Speaker 2: are just you know, finding whatever that looks like in
Speaker 2: that part of a normal.
Speaker 1: So so I think what I'm going to do.
Speaker 2: I would love to ask your advice since I don't
Speaker 2: have that get her mentality.
Speaker 1: So run this out for me, because I would like
Speaker 1: to date.
Speaker 2: I would I feel pretty full in all places of
Speaker 2: my life, but I would love to spend my free
Speaker 2: time with someone that I genuinely care about. And yeah,
Speaker 2: I was going to say something really filthy, but I'll
Speaker 2: keep that to myself.
Speaker 1: So run this out for me.
Speaker 6: Hey, we all have needs. There's nothing wrong with having pleasure.
Speaker 1: Along the human nature. It is human nature. We all
Speaker 1: have needs. It's it is what it is. So I'm
Speaker 1: out with my girlfriends.
Speaker 2: We are having drinks, we're living our best divorce summer
Speaker 2: and having the most fun. And we notice this guy
Speaker 2: at the table next to us, who is single, appears
Speaker 2: to be single.
Speaker 1: What do I do?
Speaker 2: Further, girl who doesn't want to make a.
Speaker 1: Move, tell me what to do.
Speaker 4: So I think, really, what it is is it's up
Speaker 4: to your friend who can wing wing man you.
Speaker 6: And I'm a really good wing woman. I wish I
Speaker 6: was there.
Speaker 4: I am like you in that I don't make the
Speaker 4: first move. I am all about tradition and chivalry and
Speaker 4: setting that tone right from the gate. But I have
Speaker 4: a lot of friends who are great at wing manning,
Speaker 4: and we will all do it for each other. And
Speaker 4: you come from a place of confidence when you're almost
Speaker 4: not the one. You're like one step removed on that
Speaker 4: putting yourself out there. But the most important thing is
Speaker 4: is go out feeling good about yourself and have fun.
Speaker 5: With your friends.
Speaker 4: Because I know women that go out just to meet
Speaker 4: a guy, and it's obvious to the guys. They want
Speaker 4: to see a person who's living their best life and
Speaker 4: who feels really good about themselves and what they're doing,
Speaker 4: and that will translate yeah and ad guy, that's what
Speaker 4: they want. They don't want the girl who's like on
Speaker 4: the prow.
Speaker 2: Listen, ladies, I am never going out just to meet
Speaker 2: a man.
Speaker 1: I am not. I am traveling the world.
Speaker 2: I'm eating good food, I'm catching a tan, I'm reading
Speaker 2: a good book.
Speaker 1: I am never doing that.
Speaker 2: I am always going out with the intention of of
Speaker 2: being surrounded by the women that I love in that moment.
Speaker 2: And maybe that's maybe that's why this isn't working out
Speaker 2: for me. Maybe I have to choose the next thing.
Speaker 2: What's the next thing again, Louise, I got to.
Speaker 4: Find that TikTok for you because I really tried it.
Speaker 4: It was it was crazy. But I think find a friend,
Speaker 4: even a friend like I have married friends.
Speaker 1: Who love to go out.
Speaker 5: It's like pseudo cheating for them.
Speaker 4: Quite frankly, oh yeah right, because they're so unhappy. I mean,
Speaker 4: they are so into talking to people because it's quote
Speaker 4: legalized because they're doing it on my behalf or right,
Speaker 4: but they that is the best way to do it,
Speaker 4: and then it just opens it up and it's more organic.
Speaker 1: So where are you meeting people, Louise?
Speaker 2: I hear you in saying that you're not going out
Speaker 2: with those intentions, but like, where are you meeting people?
Speaker 5: Set ups? Only setups?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: Really, okay?
Speaker 2: Because I heard you say no dating apps. You're not
Speaker 2: going out looking thirsty like you are literally relying on
Speaker 2: your close people to set you up with other single people.
Speaker 4: Or like friends of friends or and oh here's the
Speaker 4: other thing. You have to tell people you're open to
Speaker 4: being set up because people aren't focused on that in
Speaker 4: their day. They're all busy, they're focused on themselves. But
Speaker 4: I have found that sometimes I'll say, oh, you know,
Speaker 4: I still haven't found the person that I'm so into,
Speaker 4: do you know anyone? And all of a sudden, like
Speaker 4: they'll think of somebody, or it'll stay with them, or
Speaker 4: somebody else will bring it up to them and they'll say, oh,
Speaker 4: you should call her.
Speaker 5: She would be a.
Speaker 4: Great you know, a great set. So it's putting it
Speaker 4: out there as well.
Speaker 2: I'll have to think about that because I feel like
Speaker 2: a lot of my I have, like maybe I've compartmentalized
Speaker 2: my life. I have like my guy friends, and I
Speaker 2: have like my single divorce friends, and then they have
Speaker 2: like my married friends.
Speaker 1: Right, I don't know that I have any of.
Speaker 2: Those that quite mesh with the other. So I'm either
Speaker 2: a mom and with all my married group and I'm
Speaker 2: the only single divorced woman there. They're all coupled up
Speaker 2: and married and I'm like, oh, here we go. Or
Speaker 2: I'm like, don't have my kids, and I'm out with
Speaker 2: my single divorced women that I love, and then we're
Speaker 2: all single. Right, so we're all at dinner and we're
Speaker 2: all noticing the same hot guy, But there's.
Speaker 4: An ass for every saddle, right, Like the truth of
Speaker 4: the matter is is.
Speaker 5: Not it's like people are gonna it's a chemistry.
Speaker 4: I mean, it truly is a chemistry, right, So, I mean,
Speaker 4: who you're gonna match with or feel something with is
Speaker 4: maybe not who Courtney's going to. There is a kind
Speaker 4: of a unknown factor to that, Okay, But I feel like,
Speaker 4: you know, there's also people.
Speaker 5: Do you ever meet people through work?
Speaker 1: No, I'm a slight attendant and I'm on the road.
Speaker 2: Okay, so let me roll out. We're gonna wrap this up.
Speaker 2: This is such a great conversation about an airplane.
Speaker 5: I feel it's easy to meet people on an airplane.
Speaker 2: Well, first off, it's frowned upon and it goes against
Speaker 2: my contract that I signed.
Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to date my clients.
Speaker 2: I work in private aviation, Louise, not in not in airline.
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna roll out this scenario for you real
Speaker 2: and this conversation is so good. We have got to
Speaker 2: just keep this going, I think, and just and just
Speaker 2: live our best lives for the rest of everybody else
Speaker 2: listening to I do Part two, but just for your visualization.
Speaker 1: I went to dinner last night with my two pilots.
Speaker 2: They are old enough to be my dad, and one
Speaker 2: of them flew his wife in to come to Hawaii
Speaker 2: for a few days, and so the four of us
Speaker 2: are at dinner. My one pilot is sitting across from
Speaker 2: me with his wife, and then I'm sitting next to
Speaker 2: my other pilot. It looks like we're on a double date.
Speaker 2: And I'm with my old man boyfriend. So no, I'm
Speaker 2: not getting hit out I'm here, go.
Speaker 4: Take up golf lessons, join a running club, Like, if
Speaker 4: there's something, what are you passionate about?
Speaker 1: I've been working out every day. I've been working out.
Speaker 1: I've been getting my steps in.
Speaker 2: I'm in the gym with all the guys and I'm
Speaker 2: doing my bicep curls and I'm a little crap top.
Speaker 1: I've got my tummy thing.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 4: Not a chance nobody's coming up to you looking on
Speaker 4: Not a chance, No, not a chance people are.
Speaker 5: Not not coming up to you. I mean, really, I.
Speaker 6: Don't believe you men thetis. I don't believe you. And
Speaker 6: I it sounds like you do manifest Dana, I do, Cordney.
Speaker 6: And one of the best dating advice tips that I
Speaker 6: got before I met my husband and was married to,
Speaker 6: well my ex husband, was to like visualize, like what
Speaker 6: physically down to everything. How do they treat you? How
Speaker 6: do they treat your family? You know, what does a
Speaker 6: weekend look like to you? And just like really get
Speaker 6: quiet with yourself and then you'll attract that is personally
Speaker 6: something you know, I think that the universe provides. I
Speaker 6: don't think it's you know, I think and you believe
Speaker 6: in a higher power being at the right place at
Speaker 6: the right time. You just you might have a meet
Speaker 6: cute But.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 6: I don't date in LA anymore. But I don't have
Speaker 6: all the answers clearly, all right, So what I.
Speaker 2: Gathered from this entire conversation is that the next cute
Speaker 2: guy I see, I'm gonna have to go up to
Speaker 2: me and be like.
Speaker 6: Hello, nice, Sure, why do not just wave?
Speaker 5: You know?
Speaker 4: Another good place to meet people, Honestly, Chateau Marmont. I
Speaker 4: would never go sit at a bar and have dinner
Speaker 4: by myself.
Speaker 5: We're in LA.
Speaker 4: But if you are on like a trip, for example,
Speaker 4: in New York, Chicago, Dallas, Boston.
Speaker 5: Let me tell you something.
Speaker 4: It is very normal to go down to the bar
Speaker 4: at a really nice hotel, okay, and sit there and
Speaker 4: have dinner. You will meet a ton of people. One part,
Speaker 4: you would be more approachable. We're all approachable.
Speaker 2: Dyane, Louise, I've done this for sixteen years. This is
Speaker 2: this is so good. We have got to do this again.
Speaker 2: Ladies Louise and Courtney, thank you so much for joining
Speaker 2: me today. I have so many more questions tips for
Speaker 2: the trades. I feel like I need to go on
Speaker 2: a date and like our producer Heather can put you
Speaker 2: guys in my ear with the little headphone and you
Speaker 2: guys can talk me through it because I don't have
Speaker 2: the guts to do.
Speaker 6: But you just let me a wing man, or I'll
Speaker 6: fly out there, or maybe I'll set you up. I
Speaker 6: could set you up with some guys. Yeah.
Speaker 4: See, that was the whole purpose. Nothing is random. You're
Speaker 4: gonna set her up.
Speaker 2: It's her guy, right, sixteen years in this industry, ladies,
Speaker 2: I eat at the bar alone all the time, and
Speaker 2: no one never approaches me.
Speaker 1: I cannot.
Speaker 2: I am so ready for a hot divorce a summer.
Speaker 2: Are you already having one? And you want to tell
Speaker 2: us about it? Send us an email or leave us
Speaker 2: a voicemail. All of the infos in the show notes.
Speaker 2: Follow us on all of our socials. I do Part
Speaker 2: two an iHeartRadio podcast where
Speaker 1: Falling in love is the main objective.