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Speaker 1: Hi guys, and welcome back to another new episode of

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Speaker 1: You Need Therapy. I'm Cat and I am as always

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Speaker 1: so glad that you are here. And I want to

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Speaker 1: give a quick shout out to anyone who is a

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Speaker 1: new listener or first time listener. Hello, nice to meet you,

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Speaker 1: but I'm really not meeting you, but you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean. Anyway, I wanted to remind everyone, including those people,

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Speaker 1: especially um, that you can connect with me in the

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Speaker 1: podcast online on Instagram. I am at at Cat dot

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Speaker 1: de fata and you can follow the podcast at at

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Speaker 1: You Need Therapy Podcast on Instagram. Also, we have something

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Speaker 1: called the Self Love Club and you can join that

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Speaker 1: by heading to You Need Therapy podcast dot com. That

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Speaker 1: is a group of people who I send a special

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Speaker 1: message out to every single week. And if you head

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Speaker 1: to the website, you all so we'll be able to

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Speaker 1: see the store and shop the cute march we have.

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Speaker 1: I know everybody's looking for presents for holidays this year.

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Speaker 1: We have some really cute t shirts, mugs, pins, stickers,

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Speaker 1: really great stocking stuffers, So head there and check that out.

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Speaker 1: We would love that. Now to the good stuff, to

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Speaker 1: the juicy stuff. Oh my gosh, we have done it.

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Speaker 1: We finally are here after I mean literally next week

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Speaker 1: will be a year of the podcast. We have an

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Speaker 1: episode on the angiogram, and clearly this has been one

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Speaker 1: of the most requested things that you guys have asked for,

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Speaker 1: and I have been waiting for not just the right time,

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Speaker 1: but really the right person to do this with. And

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Speaker 1: you're gonna get really excited because this is a secret,

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Speaker 1: but not really a secret, because I'm telling you you're

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Speaker 1: about to get two episodes on the angiogram pretty soon.

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Speaker 1: So this is the first one. And I'm so excited,

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Speaker 1: and I'm gonna make the short as I can because

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Speaker 1: I want to jump into the stuff because the episode

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Speaker 1: is so good. But I have a therapist named Katie

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Speaker 1: Guest of the Sun, and that she is going to

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Speaker 1: take us through today the basics of what the inniagram

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Speaker 1: really is? What is this thing that people keep talking about,

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Speaker 1: Why do we like it? What even? Is a personality

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Speaker 1: test which we talk about what even as a personality?

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Speaker 1: And then we go through the basics of each of

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Speaker 1: the types. Oh my gosh, it's so good. Now, let

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Speaker 1: me tell you a little bit about Katie. She's not

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Speaker 1: only an extremely kind and warm person. She's so easy

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Speaker 1: to talk to. She also really knows what she's talking about.

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Speaker 1: Side note, I texted my friend who connected us in

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Speaker 1: the beginning afterwards and I was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I wish she could be my therapist. She's awesome. She

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Speaker 1: truly is. So she's not just a licensed therapist. She

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Speaker 1: also has an Instagram coach like she has studied and

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Speaker 1: has been trained and how to use the intiagram as

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Speaker 1: a tool effectively, which I really value. This isn't just

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Speaker 1: somebody who knows a lot about the inniagram. I know

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Speaker 1: a lot about the Instagram, but I am by no

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Speaker 1: means a coach. She offers online coaching f y I.

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Speaker 1: If you really find yourself connecting to all of of

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Speaker 1: things that we talked about today and you want to

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Speaker 1: dive deeper into that stuff and your story, do not

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Speaker 1: hesitate to connect with Katie. You can find her on

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Speaker 1: Instagram at Katie dot gust Offerson dot co. I will

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Speaker 1: put that in the description, and then online at Katie

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Speaker 1: gust Offerson dot co. Also, I want to mention that

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Speaker 1: we talked about some tests that she recommends as starting

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Speaker 1: points if you're trying to figure out where you might

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Speaker 1: land on this personality journey. I've linked those in the

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Speaker 1: description as well. Anyway, I hope you love this episode

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Speaker 1: as much as I did, and UM let me know

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Speaker 1: if you did share it. Tag us. We want to

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Speaker 1: we want to connect with you and I will see

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Speaker 1: all of you guys hopefully on Wednesday for couch Talks.

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Speaker 1: Here's my conversation about the Instagram with Katie. All Right,

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Speaker 1: we have a very exciting episode today I have. I'm

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Speaker 1: going to call her Katie G because I just went

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Speaker 1: through a tutorial about to say your last name and

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Speaker 1: it's very ea challenge. But she is a therapist in

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Speaker 1: town and I know her through a couple humans that

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Speaker 1: have seen her and people that work with her. And

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Speaker 1: it's about time we do an episode on the insiogram.

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Speaker 1: So welcome and thank you for being here. You're so welcome.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for happy Yeah, and we are going to

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Speaker 1: do we'll do an overview of like what is the

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Speaker 1: Instagram because a lot of people have no idea what

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Speaker 1: this is. They've heard it a lot, it sounds very trendy.

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Speaker 1: They might have read an Instagram post or maybe part

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Speaker 1: of a book on it, but not really sure what

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Speaker 1: it is. So We're going to tell you, guys what

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Speaker 1: it is, and then we're going to go through all

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Speaker 1: nine types and give you like a snapshot overview of

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Speaker 1: each one before we get started, though, I did get

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Speaker 1: a lot of questions, and I have my own opinion,

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Speaker 1: But for you, what is the best way for people

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Speaker 1: that start getting getting into this, what's the best way

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Speaker 1: for them to figure out their type? Is it listening

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Speaker 1: to stuff like this? Is it reading? Is it taking

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Speaker 1: a test? Such a good question. There's a lot of

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Speaker 1: differing ideas. Yeah, I found out about the Agraham before

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Speaker 1: there were online tests, and so I've read books and

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Speaker 1: that was the most helpful for me. Now we live,

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Speaker 1: I mean, we live in an angiogram saturated world and

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Speaker 1: there's so many more resources. I like to say that,

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Speaker 1: you know, there are a few online indicators that I

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Speaker 1: think are very helpful, and maybe we could link those

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Speaker 1: in the show notes. I'm not sure it's a possibility,

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Speaker 1: But what I like to say is that online tests

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Speaker 1: are a great place to jump off, and they they're

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Speaker 1: helpful because they can identify your top two or three types,

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Speaker 1: and then from there you can do your own self

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Speaker 1: study and read up on those types. And I actually

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Speaker 1: do typing interviews with people. So it's a really great

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Speaker 1: way to to know your type. But if you don't

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Speaker 1: have access to like a typing interview or or an

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Speaker 1: angiogram coach, there's just so many great books that you

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Speaker 1: can kind of figure out your top two or three

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Speaker 1: and then spend some time just kind of living into

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Speaker 1: the types through your own self steady, go into a workshop.

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Speaker 1: There's so many online resources. I'm happy to be a

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Speaker 1: resource and to triage any questions, but I like to

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Speaker 1: send people to a couple of online tests as a

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Speaker 1: jumping off point and then encourage people to either read

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Speaker 1: a book, go to a workshop, or do a typing

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Speaker 1: interview with a coach, so we can give everybody some

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Speaker 1: info on what those are, and then obviously we'll give

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Speaker 1: some contact info for you. But some people still are

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Speaker 1: probably like, what is what are you talking about? How

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Speaker 1: do you describe what the Instagram is? I think before

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Speaker 1: we get into Instagram, we kind of need to understand

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Speaker 1: what personality is. So personality is actually derived from the

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Speaker 1: Greek word persona, which means mask. And I love this

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Speaker 1: visual because it really it helps us understand just how

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Speaker 1: much we actually wear our personalities as a mask that

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Speaker 1: is very helpful in terms of protecting us and helping

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Speaker 1: us show up in the world and a favorable light.

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Speaker 1: So our personalities are made up of a constellation of

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Speaker 1: innate qualities, coping strategies, defense mechanisms, reflexes, and affects that

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Speaker 1: really do protect us from possible harm or rejections in childhood. Right,

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Speaker 1: so they also allow us to show up in a

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Speaker 1: favorable light for our coaches, and our teachers, and our friends,

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Speaker 1: you know, all the people that are important to us.

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Speaker 1: So our personalities are powerful survival strategy, and human beings

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Speaker 1: are expert in survival. I mean you know this. Over time, though,

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Speaker 1: our our personalities really become the story that we live

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Speaker 1: out of. Right It's a story that we've got memorized

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Speaker 1: and that we live out of really habitually, automatically, so

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Speaker 1: much so that other people kind of expect to encounter

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Speaker 1: our personality when they enco on her. You know, you've

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Speaker 1: you've been in a group of people, or you've come

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Speaker 1: into contact with someone and then after she leaves, you've

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Speaker 1: said turned to another friend and said, hey, what was

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Speaker 1: going on with her? She didn't seem like herself? Yes,

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Speaker 1: which I feel that deeply. I might be going too far,

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Speaker 1: but I feel that deeply as a seven is I

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Speaker 1: have an expectation to always show up very on, and

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Speaker 1: so if I'm not all over the place, it's like

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Speaker 1: something's wrong with me, when really it's like, no, I'm

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Speaker 1: just tired. But yeah, that's the expectation people have that

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be something before I'm even at the event. Absolutely,

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Speaker 1: we memorized people's personality and we have ours memorized as well.

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Speaker 1: It's so true. Yeah, you as a seven are supposed

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Speaker 1: to bring the juice right that people know this about

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Speaker 1: you part of your superpower. So as we mature and

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Speaker 1: become adults, obviously life gets a lot more complicated and

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Speaker 1: this personality that we really innocently gravitated to in childhood

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Speaker 1: is no longer needed in the same way. Right, we

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Speaker 1: don't need our personalities in the same way that we

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Speaker 1: once did for survival. We just did an episode on

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Speaker 1: Family Systems and we talked about the family roles, and

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Speaker 1: this is so much I'm obviously just going to keep

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Speaker 1: talking about myself because that's what I can relate to.

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Speaker 1: But so I was a mascot through growing up in

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Speaker 1: my family and it was great, and it helped me survive.

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Speaker 1: That helped me get my needs met and all of that.

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Speaker 1: And now you're this matches up with what you're saying

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Speaker 1: is this helps me survive. Now I'm not in that

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Speaker 1: same system, but I'm still playing that role and I

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Speaker 1: don't need that role as much. Yeah, beautifully said, that's it.

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Speaker 1: You're like putting so much skin on all of this content,

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Speaker 1: which is awesome. That's exactly it. When we grow into

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Speaker 1: early adulthood, all this sudden. You know, our personalities they

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Speaker 1: don't just go on strike or disappear, right, They keep growing,

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Speaker 1: They keep evolving with these expanded needs that we have

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Speaker 1: an adulthood, and so our personalities kind of start working

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Speaker 1: over time in order to facilitate these new complexities that

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Speaker 1: we're facing in adulthood and beyond. And so the problem

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Speaker 1: is these personalities, or these kind of protective mechanisms become

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Speaker 1: safety hazards, right when we no longer differentiate between who

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Speaker 1: we are as a person, you know, the unconditioned, true

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Speaker 1: essential self and our overgrown personalities. You know, this is

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Speaker 1: when we kind of start waking up and wondering, who

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Speaker 1: the hell am I? Like, I don't even know who

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Speaker 1: I am anymore. And that's when people pick up the fun.

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Speaker 1: They call you and they go sit on your and

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Speaker 1: you know, some kind of melt down, some kind of crisis,

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Speaker 1: existential crisis or or or some loss kind of pushes

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Speaker 1: them over the edge and they all of a sudden

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Speaker 1: they need to rediscover the truth of who they are

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Speaker 1: because we've become so attached to this personality. So I

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Speaker 1: just like to kind of tee up the Angiograham really

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Speaker 1: understanding what our personality is. Our personality are not bad.

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Speaker 1: They're so helpful. They're so beneficial, and we were brilliant

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Speaker 1: as children to kind of gravitate towards these personalities. The

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Speaker 1: thing is children are incredibly creative storytellers. They're just really

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Speaker 1: crappy interpreters, right, So we make up this personality story

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Speaker 1: when we're young, and oftentimes, Carot, we don't edit that

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Speaker 1: story until well into our adulthood, which is the like

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Speaker 1: meat of what most people are doing in a therapy

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Speaker 1: office is they're going back and looking at what is

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Speaker 1: the story that I wrote, and now, like, what's actually

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Speaker 1: the real story now that I can take a step

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Speaker 1: back from This attachment is very similar in that as

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Speaker 1: the way we're relating to the world. We make up

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Speaker 1: all these stories and that helps us develop how we

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Speaker 1: attached to people and that there's that it's very connected

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Speaker 1: to personality. And so in my office, if you've worked

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Speaker 1: with me, you have heard most of this content in

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Speaker 1: the lens of attachment and your style that way, and

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Speaker 1: we're giving you more detailed language to look at those stories,

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Speaker 1: not necessarily to this is my my understanding understanding your

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Speaker 1: angiogram type in your personality isn't to change it. We don't.

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Speaker 1: It's not the goal is to change it. But it

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Speaker 1: gives you contacts of why am I doing that? What

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Speaker 1: is the need here that I'm trying to go after?

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Speaker 1: What am I protecting myself from? Do I still need

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Speaker 1: to do that? And so I can show up way

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Speaker 1: more authentically rather in the survival mode to get my

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Speaker 1: needs met. It's it's spot on. Yeah, that's you know

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Speaker 1: the nature of transformation. Basically every spiritual teacher throughout history

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Speaker 1: has had pretty much the same message, and it's to

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Speaker 1: wake up. That is the invitation. That's the spiritual invitation,

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Speaker 1: that is the spiritual journey. Is to go from the

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Speaker 1: unreal to the real. That's the heel and and so

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Speaker 1: it's exactly what's happening transformation. At the heart of transformation

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Speaker 1: is narrative. Is us holding up, like you said, holding

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Speaker 1: up our personality story and asking ourselves, how's this working

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Speaker 1: for me? And the beauty of being a human being

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Speaker 1: is that we have an agency to change our stories.

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Speaker 1: I want you to repeat that because that's the biggest

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Speaker 1: thing that people I think they see, Oh, this is

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Speaker 1: my story, and they're like, I'm stuck with this, and

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Speaker 1: we don't have to stick stick with it, and that sentence.

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Speaker 1: We have agency to change our story once we realize

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Speaker 1: the truth. We don't have to live in a false

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Speaker 1: reality or something that we've made up to help us

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Speaker 1: survive anymore. We have the ability to change. So what

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Speaker 1: do you like then, about using the angiogram versus There's

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Speaker 1: a lot of ways to look at your personality. And

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Speaker 1: when I was in grad school, which wasn't that long ago,

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Speaker 1: we didn't talk one bit about any agram. We talked

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Speaker 1: about Myers Briggs. We ought to take that test, but

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Speaker 1: it wasn't even mentioned, so not that it wasn't around.

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Speaker 1: So what do you like about it and why do

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Speaker 1: you think it's become so huge. That is the deal, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean the angiogram. So let me tell you what

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Speaker 1: the what the angiogram is. We've just kind of teat

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Speaker 1: it up by talking about personality. So in essence, the

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Speaker 1: angiogram is this kind of a lot of people say

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Speaker 1: it's ancient, it's actually, I mean, there are clues of

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Speaker 1: the angiogram that date back to the fourth century as

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Speaker 1: a beautiful kind of archetypal map um, if you will. Now,

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Speaker 1: the modern angiogram of personality really has just gotten more

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Speaker 1: momentum starting back in like the nineteen seventies. The anagram

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Speaker 1: that we use with the nine types is fairly new.

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Speaker 1: It's a holistic personality and character typing system that's used

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Speaker 1: to deepen self awareness and understanding. And I want to

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Speaker 1: break that down for you. Basically, again per sonality being

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Speaker 1: derived from that Greek word meaning mask. The personality basically

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Speaker 1: is more on the surface. So when you took the

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Speaker 1: Myers Briggs that is really diving into more surface level

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Speaker 1: behavior kind of the objects of who we are on

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Speaker 1: the surface. The character structure of each type, however, goes

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Speaker 1: deeper than personality. The character structure basically unpacked the why

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Speaker 1: behind how we think feel an apt So that is why,

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Speaker 1: to answer your question, the angiogram of personality is a

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Speaker 1: powerful tool that I love to use in therapy because

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Speaker 1: our lives and are the agency that we have to change.

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Speaker 1: Our story has to be supported by an understanding of

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Speaker 1: our story, and the angiogram provides that. Myers Briggs, which

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Speaker 1: I think is a great tool. I love strengths, find errs,

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Speaker 1: I love disk all of those are really powerful, but

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Speaker 1: they don't go beneath personality to this underlying character structure

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Speaker 1: that talks about motivations, that talks about just the why

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Speaker 1: behind who we are. So that's a powerful complexity that

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Speaker 1: the angiogram provides. And and and if you look at

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Speaker 1: the angiogram, it's actually a diagram of nine points and

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Speaker 1: it can be used literally in therapy if we if

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Speaker 1: we learn how to use it properly as a roadmap

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Speaker 1: to help us get unstuck. Essentially, I love this quote.

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Speaker 1: It's a Michelangelo quote, and it says, the sculpture is

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Speaker 1: already complete within the marble block before I start my work.

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Speaker 1: Already there, I just have to chisel away the superfluous material.

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Speaker 1: So and that's so good to me that quote is

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Speaker 1: all about because humming our truest selves. Right, everything we

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Speaker 1: need we've got. That's why what you said about deleting

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Speaker 1: and replacing our personality, we're not trying to do that.

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Speaker 1: We're trying to enhance what's already there. We're trying to

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Speaker 1: connect in a very intimate way to what's already there.

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Speaker 1: You know, we were born into this world as loving,

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Speaker 1: curious beings. We were born into this world without fear.

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Speaker 1: The fear part we learned. So we have to kind

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Speaker 1: of get back to our true nature, not by changing

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Speaker 1: who we are, but by learning about and harnessing the

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Speaker 1: truest version of ourselves. And I believe that the indiagram

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Speaker 1: is the most powerful tool we have to do that.

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Speaker 1: And I think in all of what you just said,

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Speaker 1: what I'm hearing a lot of is the instagram is

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Speaker 1: a tool, when used correctly, helps us come back home.

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Speaker 1: Like come back home. It's like we've lost our way

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Speaker 1: or I don't know, we took a turn that whatever,

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Speaker 1: but it helps us come back home. It doesn't change us.

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Speaker 1: It just helped brings us back to who we are. Yes,

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Speaker 1: that is it? So what you wouldn't want to do

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Speaker 1: that I want to know, you know, I know, and

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Speaker 1: and again like a lot of people misuse this tool.

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Speaker 1: You know a lot of people misuse it and it

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Speaker 1: becomes very annoying. Yeah, I mean, I will say I

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Speaker 1: there's I used to follow a lot of accounts and

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Speaker 1: I've unfollowed them, not because I'm not interested in the Instagram,

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Speaker 1: but I'm like, well, first of all, this isn't that

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Speaker 1: doesn't describe me at all as a seven. And now

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Speaker 1: I almost have like, well, I'm not a good enough set.

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Speaker 1: But then it's like, well, why are we doing this?

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Speaker 1: Because is it to be like, oh, I know you

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Speaker 1: your seven, I know you? Or is it to like

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Speaker 1: it's not used to understand deeper, it's like to assume

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Speaker 1: almost Is that how you've been seeing it? Yeah, there's

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Speaker 1: a whole kind of ethics. I mean, that's a whole

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Speaker 1: Another podcast conversation is the ethics around the aiogram. There

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Speaker 1: is a way to use this and honor it when

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Speaker 1: it's used for height and to indulge our type disease,

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Speaker 1: that is, and we abuse it. Yeah, I like the

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Speaker 1: word I've I like that. Yeah, when we and we

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Speaker 1: when we use it to indulge our type tendency, that

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Speaker 1: is when it becomes abusive and misused. So I just

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Speaker 1: want to apologize, blanket public service announcement apology. If you

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Speaker 1: have encountered this tool and it's been misused and you've

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Speaker 1: really been turned off, I do apologize. I hope you'll

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Speaker 1: give it another chance, because you know, at the heart

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Speaker 1: of self love, before we love anything or anyone, we

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Speaker 1: have to understand who they are. Before we can love ourselves.

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Speaker 1: We have to learn how to understand ourselves. And I

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Speaker 1: just believe that the insiogram is the most powerful tool

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Speaker 1: we have to help us understand and develop more compassion

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Speaker 1: for ourselves and others. And in light of that, the

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Speaker 1: angiogram teaching basically says that there are nine core types

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Speaker 1: of personality, one of which we gravitated to early in childhood.

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Speaker 1: That's not just to say that there are only nine

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Speaker 1: types of people in the world. You are a human

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Speaker 1: being before your your angiogram type. This is just again,

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Speaker 1: it's a helpful indicator that helps you navigate. This is interesting,

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Speaker 1: like what you said about going home to the truth

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Speaker 1: of who you are. I think it is so brilliant.

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Speaker 1: I think it's so true. I like to call it

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Speaker 1: a personalized roadmap for soulful self awareness and development. You know,

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Speaker 1: it's really about getting unstuck. It's really about getting out

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Speaker 1: of our own way. It's about going home to the

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Speaker 1: truth of who you are. So yes, I love that

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Speaker 1: you kind of drew that out. It's so true for

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Speaker 1: the people that are I mean, you could be a

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Speaker 1: veteran in this, or think you're a veteran, or your

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Speaker 1: brand new to this. Now that we know what it is, Okay,

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Speaker 1: so I'm gonna go dart out taking some tests online,

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Speaker 1: get some a couple like core numbers that might be

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Speaker 1: kind of what I gravitate towards when they're doing this.

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Speaker 1: Because what my understanding when I first started this journey

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Speaker 1: figuring out my own type, I was told to look

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Speaker 1: at it, look at the traits and all the things.

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Speaker 1: Not you now, but you, I think it was like

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Speaker 1: before you were like twenty four or something. I might

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Speaker 1: have made that up. Is that true? What version of you?

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Speaker 1: Where is he supposed to be thinking of? But you

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Speaker 1: know again, I think people kind of tend to over

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Speaker 1: complicate it. It's true if you're on offense about a

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Speaker 1: question that you're answering on some type of person online

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Speaker 1: test and you don't know which one is true. They

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Speaker 1: say to go back to when you're around twenty two

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Speaker 1: years old, because that's when your personality is most kind

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Speaker 1: of florid, most vibrant, if you will, that's when our

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Speaker 1: personalities are really really in action. But you know, I

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Speaker 1: like to say most the good tests out there they

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Speaker 1: have enough questions on them to kind of weed through

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Speaker 1: what you are and what you're not. But I think

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Speaker 1: that is a good rule rule of them. You know,

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Speaker 1: if you're just offense about a question, you're like, gosh,

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Speaker 1: do I do this? Or do I do this? You know,

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Speaker 1: a good rule of them is to go back to

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Speaker 1: your early twenties and what would you do? Then that's

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Speaker 1: kind of a good litmus test for what the right

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Speaker 1: answer is. The angiogram against suggests that there's nine types

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Speaker 1: nine nine personality types, and those nine types of personalities

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Speaker 1: are divided into three triads, and the three triads are

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Speaker 1: based in our centers of intelligence. So the angiogram again

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Speaker 1: recognizes that there's three centers of intelligence, the mind, the heart,

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Speaker 1: and the body, and they're equally as important in terms

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Speaker 1: of understanding the way we work and understanding the world.

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Speaker 1: And this is spelled out for all the iniogram types.

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Speaker 1: If you are an eight and nine and a one

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Speaker 1: you live in the body or instinctual center of intelligence.

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Speaker 1: If you are a two, three, and a four you

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Speaker 1: live in the feelings or the heart triad or center

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Speaker 1: of intelligence. And then if you're five, sticks and seven

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Speaker 1: you are in the head or mental center of intelligence.

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Speaker 1: So we're going to run through kind of what those are,

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Speaker 1: what's the breakdown, why are they important, and then we'll

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Speaker 1: dive into type and through nine. So Western science in

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Speaker 1: medicine has really really elevated one center of intelligence, which

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Speaker 1: is our thinking center of intelligence, of the other two.

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Speaker 1: And this goes all the way back to kind of Descartes.

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Speaker 1: I think therefore I am this kind of inability to

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Speaker 1: separate our humanity from our head center of intelligence. That's

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Speaker 1: that was the elevated and it really has been ever

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Speaker 1: since center of intelligence. Yet so many ancient traditions the

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Speaker 1: angiogram included talk about three centers of intelligence. Of course,

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Speaker 1: the the head center of intelligence, but the body and

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Speaker 1: the heart center of intelligence. And modern medicine is finally

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Speaker 1: catching up to this ancient wisdom as they've found neural

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Speaker 1: cells basically in the linings of our stomachs and our hearts,

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Speaker 1: So we have brain cells in our brain but also

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Speaker 1: in our heart and in our guts, and that cool.

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Speaker 1: It excites me so much that kind of Western psychology

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Speaker 1: and medicine we're catching up to this ancient wisdom that

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Speaker 1: really honors the body center of intelligence as wisdom and

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Speaker 1: the emotional center of intelligence as widom as well. So

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Speaker 1: it's it's so cool because the angiogram teaches that basically

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Speaker 1: part of self development and self understanding is to understand

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Speaker 1: what center of intelligence you operate from a and how

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Speaker 1: to balance out your relationship with all three centers. That's

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Speaker 1: what I like is that one is not better than

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Speaker 1: the other. There's three and they're equal. You just lean

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Speaker 1: towards one more than others. Absolutely, So as a four,

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Speaker 1: I very much experience the world through my heart center

430
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:29,240
Speaker 1: of intelligence. You know, my feelings, have feelings. I can

431
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 1: feel something at the drop of a hat, right that

432
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 1: tends to be where I'm out of balance. And so

433
00:25:35,119 --> 00:25:38,800
Speaker 1: the goal is not to turn down that emotional center,

434
00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:42,520
Speaker 1: it's to dial up the other two. So I need

435
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:47,159
Speaker 1: to connect more to the analytical skills and the fact checking.

436
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:50,280
Speaker 1: The logical part of your brain, logical part of my brain,

437
00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:56,280
Speaker 1: as as well as connecting to this grounded center of

438
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:59,840
Speaker 1: intelligence with the instinctual center, So getting into my body,

439
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,720
Speaker 1: getting into my kind of thinking mind a little bit more.

440
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,240
Speaker 1: I can't feel my way to a deadline right right,

441
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 1: So I got to enlist these other two tryads or

442
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:13,280
Speaker 1: centers of intelligence. You know. Helen Palmer, who is one

443
00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:16,760
Speaker 1: of the founders of the Narrative Indiogram school that I

444
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: did much training at. She likes to say that body

445
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 1: types need to get more into their hearts, heart types

446
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 1: need to get more into their heads, and head types

447
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:31,959
Speaker 1: need to get more into their bodies. So it's probably

448
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:34,800
Speaker 1: a little bit oversimplified, but it's I think it's a

449
00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:38,320
Speaker 1: really great place to start in terms of actually using

450
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:42,080
Speaker 1: the inniogram for application. I've never heard somebody describe stuff.

451
00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,679
Speaker 1: Maybe I just haven't heard it that way, but in

452
00:26:44,720 --> 00:26:47,240
Speaker 1: the sense that this isn't just to say that like

453
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,760
Speaker 1: you are a body type or you are this, it's

454
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,199
Speaker 1: to say this is where you lean the most, and

455
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 1: you need more of the others. I've always heard it

456
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 1: as almost not a death sentence, but kind of like

457
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,199
Speaker 1: this is you, You're in the heart triad. So this

458
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:01,159
Speaker 1: is how you are rather than I just want you

459
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,800
Speaker 1: to know you're in the heart triad, because that's a

460
00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,360
Speaker 1: clue to tell you you're good on that you need

461
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 1: to lean on these other parts a little bit more totally.

462
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:10,919
Speaker 1: I like the way you explain that. And you know,

463
00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:15,920
Speaker 1: every triad has one type that typically overdes that center.

464
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:19,399
Speaker 1: I'll continue to put myself on the operating table. But

465
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 1: in the heart triad, fours tend to overdo their emotion,

466
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:28,000
Speaker 1: Threes tend to kind of repress their emotion, and two

467
00:27:28,160 --> 00:27:30,600
Speaker 1: tend to kind of underdo it or or you know,

468
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:32,800
Speaker 1: kind of stuff it and put on a happy face.

469
00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 1: And so even in your triad, kind of like in

470
00:27:37,040 --> 00:27:39,639
Speaker 1: the body triad, to like, eights tend to kind of

471
00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:44,280
Speaker 1: overdo their anger, Nines tend to forget their anger. You know,

472
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,880
Speaker 1: ones are kind of in repression with their anger. So

473
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:52,640
Speaker 1: even within their our triads, there is a fine tuning

474
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:57,560
Speaker 1: of our relationship with that center of intelligence. So yes,

475
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:01,440
Speaker 1: you're right, it is a balancing oath within the triad

476
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:05,080
Speaker 1: and within the other triads in our relationship all the

477
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:08,919
Speaker 1: way around. It's it's just really fascinating. And like I said,

478
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:12,119
Speaker 1: the heart triad is made up of two threes and fours.

479
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 1: The head triad five, sixes and sevens. In the body

480
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:18,720
Speaker 1: triad eights, nins and ones, and type eight is kind

481
00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:22,680
Speaker 1: of where I jump off in terms of unpacking each

482
00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:25,879
Speaker 1: each type. So we'll start at the top of the

483
00:28:26,119 --> 00:28:30,440
Speaker 1: diagram with type bit often called the challenger, often called

484
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 1: the protector. Eight's attention goes to who's got the control.

485
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 1: Eights are self confident, decisive, willful, oftentimes confrontational, and they

486
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:46,040
Speaker 1: are are kind of their unconscious motivation is the need

487
00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:50,680
Speaker 1: to protect themselves and others, to avoid being controlled and

488
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:53,959
Speaker 1: to pave their own way in life. They're obviously very

489
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:57,000
Speaker 1: one of the assertive types, and they're very self referencing.

490
00:28:57,280 --> 00:29:00,400
Speaker 1: They seek justice, So you know, eight to get a

491
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:05,960
Speaker 1: bad rap because especially eight women, because they cannot be

492
00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:08,920
Speaker 1: a little rough around the edges, and you know, they

493
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:13,080
Speaker 1: do like to challenge, but it's typically out of justice.

494
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:17,560
Speaker 1: They do have a role pulse on on justice and

495
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 1: the good of all they're they're really trying to affect

496
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:24,560
Speaker 1: change for the good of the marginalized or or the weak,

497
00:29:24,760 --> 00:29:27,080
Speaker 1: and so gosh, I think eights tend to be the

498
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:30,720
Speaker 1: most misunderstood yeah, well, you know, I think it was

499
00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:33,920
Speaker 1: in and Crowns The Road Back to You. I think

500
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,560
Speaker 1: it wasn't that his book that I was when I

501
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:39,400
Speaker 1: was reading The Eights, it said that eight's view confrontation

502
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:42,960
Speaker 1: as intimacy. So where some people are like, oh my gosh,

503
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:45,520
Speaker 1: I can't believe they're like, I was feeling really close

504
00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:48,320
Speaker 1: to you and somebody else can interpret that, especially if

505
00:29:48,360 --> 00:29:52,120
Speaker 1: you're not an eight as I can't believe them, like whatever,

506
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:54,720
Speaker 1: if they really don't like confrontation, but really that's their

507
00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:57,760
Speaker 1: way to feel close or express love in the form

508
00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 1: of justice seeking. Yeah, totally. Is their love language is

509
00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 1: just shooting straight from the hip. It's not it's not

510
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 1: beating around the bush. You know. That doesn't feel loving

511
00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:13,040
Speaker 1: to them? Um, I think, yeah, I love that. I

512
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 1: think I remember reading that totally. What it doesn't feel

513
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 1: loving to be passive aggressive? Probably is that fit or

514
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 1: just passive in general. They're gonna be direct because that's

515
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 1: the way they show love. And a lot of people

516
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 1: think that a way to show love is to avoid,

517
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:32,440
Speaker 1: which isn't better. It's not better, No, not at all.

518
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:34,800
Speaker 1: It's not better. It's not better. And we have to

519
00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 1: remember again, if we're looking at the story, the personality story. Yeah, eight,

520
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,440
Speaker 1: so a lot of time had to grow up before

521
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:45,040
Speaker 1: the rest of us. You know, they had to they

522
00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,280
Speaker 1: they were really young when they had to grow up.

523
00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:50,120
Speaker 1: They had to be strong, they had to be tough.

524
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:53,440
Speaker 1: They had to care for other people and take care

525
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 1: of other people, including including themselves. So they didn't have

526
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 1: the luxury of this kind of kind of childlike innocence.

527
00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 1: So they think. So that is again it's their survival

528
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:09,440
Speaker 1: and how they it's how they communicate. Um, it's just

529
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:13,120
Speaker 1: the way they learned, right, And you know, they bring

530
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 1: big energy into the room and they use that energy

531
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:19,200
Speaker 1: really to affect change. Always say, if you want to

532
00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:22,680
Speaker 1: start a new business, partner with an A. They just

533
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:27,480
Speaker 1: they get they get stuff done, and um, they're incredibly efficient.

534
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:32,320
Speaker 1: They do fear being harmed, controlled, or portrayed. To portrayal

535
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 1: is a big deal for them. They value independence and

536
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:40,520
Speaker 1: resist again being indebted to anyone. So so when they're healthy,

537
00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:44,160
Speaker 1: they are natural leaders and they have a really solid

538
00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:48,440
Speaker 1: commanding presence and they just they just fiercely protect their people.

539
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,959
Speaker 1: And I think there might be fear in relationships with

540
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:55,400
Speaker 1: an eight. But also if it's a healthy relationship. It

541
00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:58,120
Speaker 1: sounds like that person would be thinking by your side

542
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 1: and fighting for you and helping you make your dreams

543
00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:02,560
Speaker 1: come true. I could be making that up, but so

544
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,000
Speaker 1: it sounds like, yeah, no, you're not making that up,

545
00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:08,360
Speaker 1: not at all. You know, they're their invitation is to

546
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,120
Speaker 1: connect to their own vulnerability, you know, because that's what

547
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:15,120
Speaker 1: they had to survive, not being able to do at

548
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:17,960
Speaker 1: such a young age. So can the invitation, you know,

549
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 1: the passionate type eight. The emotional pattern they get stuck

550
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:23,360
Speaker 1: in is lust. And I don't mean less in a

551
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 1: sexual sense. It's just kind of this lust, this intensity

552
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:31,000
Speaker 1: for life, and they you know, along the way, they

553
00:32:31,040 --> 00:32:34,840
Speaker 1: lose touch with their innocence and vulnerability. So connecting back

554
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 1: to that that vulnerability is part of the work of

555
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:41,240
Speaker 1: an eight. So would you say, what's hard about being

556
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 1: an eight? Is the I mean, would you say fear

557
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 1: of vulnerability or or difficulty being vulnerable? Like, what's tough

558
00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:49,920
Speaker 1: about being eight? I mean, I think there's there's a

559
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:53,240
Speaker 1: lot of things. I think people misunderstand eights a lot

560
00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:56,360
Speaker 1: of times. Again, especially women. You know, if you're a

561
00:32:56,480 --> 00:32:59,120
Speaker 1: guy and you're an eight in a boardroom, you're you're

562
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 1: a strong leader. If you're a woman and you're a

563
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:04,200
Speaker 1: strong eight, and you know in a bordering, you're a

564
00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 1: bit right. And so I think you know, eights have obviously,

565
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:13,360
Speaker 1: like we all do, they have vulnerable parts of who

566
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:15,960
Speaker 1: they are, but they just they have been conditioned to

567
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:19,320
Speaker 1: not access those parts or show them to anyone. So

568
00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 1: that is that is hard, you know, always having to

569
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:25,920
Speaker 1: be strong. I work with so many amazing eight women

570
00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:30,360
Speaker 1: clients who just are exhausted. You're exhausted. They are so

571
00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 1: tired of being strong, They're so tired of pressing the

572
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:37,520
Speaker 1: needle forward, and um, they a lot of times they

573
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,880
Speaker 1: just don't feel like they have the luxury to relax.

574
00:33:41,280 --> 00:33:44,200
Speaker 1: So I like the idea of the invitation for an eight.

575
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:46,440
Speaker 1: So something that they might need to hear is it's

576
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,280
Speaker 1: okay to be vulnerable, It's okay to let your guard down,

577
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:52,920
Speaker 1: something like that, to connect with those softer parts, to

578
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 1: show the world those softer parts, because we want to

579
00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 1: see or I do I want to leave the soft parts,

580
00:33:57,760 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 1: you know, type nines moving me, moving forward, often called

581
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:04,560
Speaker 1: the mediator or the peacemaker. Wait, I gotta say this

582
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:07,680
Speaker 1: because it's just funny. I put out a question on

583
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:09,680
Speaker 1: Instagram that said, what do you want to know? What

584
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:12,480
Speaker 1: the Instagram? What are your questions? And multiple people this

585
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:14,799
Speaker 1: is not I did not expect this. Multiple people said

586
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:17,640
Speaker 1: why is nine the best number? And usually it's like

587
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:21,279
Speaker 1: talk about my seventh the best number, but so many

588
00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 1: nines were like one. I got more questions about nine

589
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 1: than any but multiple people are like talk about why

590
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:29,759
Speaker 1: nines are the best, and I'm like, that's I like

591
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:34,480
Speaker 1: that so great. They are so beloved, just like sevens.

592
00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 1: You know, I've heard different theories, but I've I've just

593
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:40,640
Speaker 1: heard people also say that there's more not type nines

594
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:43,160
Speaker 1: than any other type. I don't know if that plays

595
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 1: into it, but oh yeah, nines are just they're so lovable,

596
00:34:47,280 --> 00:34:51,280
Speaker 1: you know. Their attention always kind of goes to, uh,

597
00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:55,320
Speaker 1: the agenda of others and how to keep the peace. Obviously,

598
00:34:55,520 --> 00:35:01,319
Speaker 1: they're easy going, self effacing, laid back, receptive, agreeable. They're motivated.

599
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:05,160
Speaker 1: This unconscious motivation is, you know, the need to kind

600
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:09,360
Speaker 1: of avoid to avoid pain, avoid confrontation, to keep the

601
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:12,880
Speaker 1: peace for themselves and others. They see the value and

602
00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: everyone's point of view. That's why a lot of times

603
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,480
Speaker 1: they are called the mediator, and I think a lot

604
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:23,680
Speaker 1: of people feel seen by type minds, right minds. I'm

605
00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:26,600
Speaker 1: married to a nine and he just doesn't have really

606
00:35:26,880 --> 00:35:30,240
Speaker 1: he's also a drummer, so he just he feels fine

607
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 1: in the background, you know, like he doesn't need to

608
00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:35,520
Speaker 1: be in the limelight. He doesn't need you know, all

609
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:39,719
Speaker 1: eyes on him. He's very very conscientious about checking in

610
00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:41,959
Speaker 1: with you know, kind of the least of these and

611
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:44,400
Speaker 1: and and just finding out how he can. You know,

612
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:47,239
Speaker 1: they can feel more at ease. Their belief is that

613
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:51,360
Speaker 1: you are good or okay as long as others around

614
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,759
Speaker 1: you are good or okay. They do tend to be

615
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:59,600
Speaker 1: spiritually very very grounded, and and they're healthy and definitely

616
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:03,800
Speaker 1: ground in the physical world, can be very steady energy wise,

617
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:07,640
Speaker 1: and you know, obviously an unhealthy levels. Nines can have

618
00:36:07,800 --> 00:36:11,719
Speaker 1: a real trouble making decisions. They can become lazy to

619
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 1: their own self development. They can become overly dependent on

620
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 1: the agendas of other people. You know, they can tend

621
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:23,239
Speaker 1: to kind of knock out and none out more than

622
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:26,759
Speaker 1: any other kind of the prototype right for I mean,

623
00:36:27,320 --> 00:36:29,360
Speaker 1: we all numb, but they are kind of the prototype

624
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:31,920
Speaker 1: for it. And I mean in any specific ways or

625
00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 1: is it anything. I think it just depends like a

626
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 1: lot of like TV can be a big number. Have

627
00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:42,719
Speaker 1: heard people say video games, Um, sleep can be a number. Comfort.

628
00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:45,640
Speaker 1: They said this at the at the narrative training that

629
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 1: I went through. They're like, comfort is not your friend

630
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,200
Speaker 1: as a nine, right, Like, for a lot of people,

631
00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 1: comfort is a way of kind of self care, etcetera.

632
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:56,919
Speaker 1: But for the nine, you know, they tend to kind

633
00:36:56,960 --> 00:37:00,640
Speaker 1: of overdo comfort and indulge comfort so much so that

634
00:37:00,719 --> 00:37:04,359
Speaker 1: they will kind of fall asleep to the world around them.

635
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:07,359
Speaker 1: What's the deal with a nine and anger? Because they

636
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:10,800
Speaker 1: act like they don't care. This is a generalization obviously,

637
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:12,440
Speaker 1: but they act like they don't care about a lot

638
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 1: of stuff. But what what do they do with their anger?

639
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:16,839
Speaker 1: How is it? How are they processing it? Are they

640
00:37:16,840 --> 00:37:19,120
Speaker 1: falling asleep to their anger and numbing their anger? Falling

641
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,960
Speaker 1: asleep to their anger? Because if they were to access

642
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:26,200
Speaker 1: their anger, that could threaten their connection to other people,

643
00:37:26,719 --> 00:37:31,120
Speaker 1: right that that would threaten their their unconscious motivation of

644
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:34,480
Speaker 1: keeping the peace. So of course they have anger, but

645
00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:36,680
Speaker 1: they just kind of fall asleep to it. You know,

646
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 1: if you ask a nine when the last time they

647
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,960
Speaker 1: got angry was they'd probably tell you, like in twenty

648
00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:46,160
Speaker 1: sixteen or something like, they can go a long time

649
00:37:46,480 --> 00:37:49,759
Speaker 1: without really accessing it. But I believe that they're kind

650
00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 1: of the spiritual work. The deeper work for the type

651
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:57,480
Speaker 1: nine is to access anger and health. Because we talk

652
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,440
Speaker 1: about feelings all the time on this podcast. Anger is

653
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:03,279
Speaker 1: one of my favorite feelings because it shows us what

654
00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 1: we want, It shows us, it brings justice to situations,

655
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 1: and it lets us know that we have boundaries. And

656
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:12,279
Speaker 1: so would the invitation to a nine be just that

657
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:14,920
Speaker 1: of like to like allow themselves to feel that anger

658
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,920
Speaker 1: so its feels vulnerable, and then a nine would be

659
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:20,840
Speaker 1: like get angry. Yeah, I mean I think eights, I

660
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:24,080
Speaker 1: mean nines and woms have a tricky relationship with anger.

661
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:26,399
Speaker 1: We'll talk about that when we talk about one here

662
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:29,560
Speaker 1: in a second, But yeah, I think probably. I know

663
00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 1: for myself really anger is at the heart of it

664
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 1: is passion, and that to me is the most beautiful

665
00:38:37,680 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 1: state of any nine. Like when they get passionate about

666
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:43,879
Speaker 1: something and they find their voice and they use it.

667
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:48,279
Speaker 1: That is to me when I feel most attracted to

668
00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:52,280
Speaker 1: nines and I feel like, wow, I want to shut

669
00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,760
Speaker 1: up because you're talking, and you don't. You don't waste

670
00:38:55,840 --> 00:38:59,279
Speaker 1: or mince words very often, you know. So I think

671
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:05,080
Speaker 1: part of connecting with the deeper fears around anger, you know, unpacking,

672
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:08,040
Speaker 1: Like if if you and I were to work with

673
00:39:08,080 --> 00:39:11,040
Speaker 1: a nine a type none client, you know, maybe part

674
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,560
Speaker 1: of what we would work through is exploring their relationship

675
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:19,359
Speaker 1: with anger, you know, exploring kind of how they came

676
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: to that relationship with anger, and then really providing some

677
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 1: safe space to access that anger so that no, no

678
00:39:27,719 --> 00:39:30,759
Speaker 1: tie will be severed and we see them and just

679
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:34,480
Speaker 1: the same light and beauty as we once did. Right.

680
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:37,320
Speaker 1: It's the lot, that kind of the lot that glues

681
00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:40,480
Speaker 1: their character structure together, this kind of belief that they

682
00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 1: make up in their head that I'm only okay or

683
00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 1: loved if I can keep the peace. We're trying to

684
00:39:47,040 --> 00:39:51,000
Speaker 1: invite and and and and support our nines to live

685
00:39:51,080 --> 00:39:54,600
Speaker 1: beyond that. Yeah, they just don't learn that conflict can

686
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 1: happen and there can be repair. Yes, beautiful way of

687
00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:01,880
Speaker 1: seeing it. So type one again about the last body

688
00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:04,880
Speaker 1: type nines. If we want to jump into anger again,

689
00:40:05,080 --> 00:40:09,160
Speaker 1: Nines tend to push down their anger or they tend

690
00:40:09,200 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 1: to show their anger as frustration or resentment, because anger

691
00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:18,080
Speaker 1: for a Type one is seen as kind of a

692
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:20,880
Speaker 1: bad emotion, and they don't want to be bad, and

693
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:24,839
Speaker 1: the unconscious motivation is to be seen as right and

694
00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: good for a Type one. So if they were to

695
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:32,359
Speaker 1: become angry and give way to that anger again, that

696
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:36,960
Speaker 1: could threaten their you know, this belief that they hold

697
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: so tightly that they have to be good, they have

698
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,239
Speaker 1: to be right, and and that is that's not good

699
00:40:43,239 --> 00:40:46,000
Speaker 1: and right. Anger is not a good emotion. It's not

700
00:40:46,719 --> 00:40:50,240
Speaker 1: what ones look do they look happy all the time, well,

701
00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 1: or now we look frustrated. They tend to be a

702
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:56,680
Speaker 1: little bit more serious, but they kind of express their

703
00:40:56,719 --> 00:41:00,600
Speaker 1: anger as frustration. They look really had types a lot

704
00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:03,040
Speaker 1: of times. It's almost like if you are. If I

705
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 1: were to ask are you angry, they'd be like, no,

706
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:07,680
Speaker 1: I'm just annoyed. It's like I'm not. They won't go

707
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,040
Speaker 1: that deep. They won't they won't give way to that

708
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:13,680
Speaker 1: kind of full expression of anger. Okay, It's part of

709
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:17,280
Speaker 1: their deep inner work too, is to kind of repair

710
00:41:17,320 --> 00:41:20,400
Speaker 1: that relationship with anger, because what happens is, you know,

711
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:24,920
Speaker 1: they can kind of repress, repress, repress, repress, forget, forget

712
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 1: you know whatever, and fly off the handle, you know,

713
00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 1: go to that impaired state, which is rage. Their attention.

714
00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:33,839
Speaker 1: Type one is often called the reformer. A lot of

715
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:38,000
Speaker 1: people know Type ones as the perfectionist, although gosh, I

716
00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:40,640
Speaker 1: don't know about you, but I meet so many ones

717
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,879
Speaker 1: that just don't see themselves as perfection and that throw

718
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:45,839
Speaker 1: I think that's what throws a lot of people off

719
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:47,680
Speaker 1: when it comes to one. They're like, no, I'm not

720
00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:49,799
Speaker 1: we're not organized, or I'm not this, or I'm not that,

721
00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:52,319
Speaker 1: or I don't have to have everything in line, and

722
00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:54,600
Speaker 1: so they just throw that type out the window when

723
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:56,560
Speaker 1: it really might be who they are. Yeah, that's why

724
00:41:56,560 --> 00:42:00,560
Speaker 1: I love to just encourage people. Don't just side you're

725
00:42:00,600 --> 00:42:03,120
Speaker 1: type based on the name of the time. I like

726
00:42:03,239 --> 00:42:06,480
Speaker 1: to just call it type you know, type type one,

727
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:10,520
Speaker 1: type two, type three instead of the perfection because they

728
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 1: really can be misleading. But yeah, their attention goes to

729
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:17,440
Speaker 1: what's missing or wrong in a room and how to

730
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:19,759
Speaker 1: improve it. Right. A lot of some people call them

731
00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:24,520
Speaker 1: the improvers, how to improve what's already there. They're super rational,

732
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:32,120
Speaker 1: super organized, idealistic, purposeful. They can be really characterized by

733
00:42:32,160 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 1: this need to be good and virtuous and in balance

734
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:39,360
Speaker 1: and integrity is a huge word for Type one, which

735
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:42,399
Speaker 1: I need lots of ones in my life as a seven. Right,

736
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 1: They're so helpful bring you into balance. Yeah. Well, and

737
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:49,880
Speaker 1: just like my head is going seventeen different directions and

738
00:42:49,920 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 1: they can almost helps like balance, I guess center me

739
00:42:53,200 --> 00:42:55,600
Speaker 1: where I'm like, I don't care about that. Sometimes they're like,

740
00:42:55,600 --> 00:42:57,759
Speaker 1: well you should care because this helps this part of this.

741
00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:00,960
Speaker 1: They just see things I don't have the ability see. Yeah,

742
00:43:01,160 --> 00:43:04,439
Speaker 1: that's really interesting. I love hearing that. Yeah, that makes

743
00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:06,839
Speaker 1: a lot of sense. That is a resource point for

744
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:09,719
Speaker 1: you in terms of like your flow line to the one.

745
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 1: You know. They The flip side of that is they

746
00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 1: can be super overly critical, and I think of all

747
00:43:16,600 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 1: the types, they have the most violent inner critic. And

748
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:24,319
Speaker 1: you know, this unconscious belief that they have is like

749
00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:27,480
Speaker 1: you must be good and right to be worthy. There's

750
00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 1: a lot of shame I feel like associated to with

751
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:35,520
Speaker 1: type type ones. Oftentimes, you know, they're just highly conscientious, responsible,

752
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 1: Like if I ever have brain surgery, I really want

753
00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:41,799
Speaker 1: to Type one as my nerves hands down. Why do

754
00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:45,040
Speaker 1: you think that like childhood, is there one specific or

755
00:43:45,120 --> 00:43:48,960
Speaker 1: main childhood wound that gets hit for these people that

756
00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:51,160
Speaker 1: fall into the one category, or is it more of

757
00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:53,759
Speaker 1: a belief system of I'm not good enough? Yeah? I

758
00:43:53,760 --> 00:43:56,759
Speaker 1: think I think that. You know, there's a lot of rigidity,

759
00:43:56,880 --> 00:43:59,799
Speaker 1: a lot of you know, sometimes not measuring up at

760
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:04,320
Speaker 1: a really small age, a lot of times being brought

761
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:10,480
Speaker 1: up and highly structured, highly rigid oftentimes maybe military households

762
00:44:10,760 --> 00:44:15,600
Speaker 1: where the emphasis was a lot around, maybe legalism, just

763
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:18,160
Speaker 1: a lot of a lot of rules, a lot of

764
00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:23,520
Speaker 1: early responsibility. What's their take on vulnerability? Is that seen

765
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:28,040
Speaker 1: as good or bad or scary? What does vulnerability look like? Typically?

766
00:44:28,160 --> 00:44:31,400
Speaker 1: I think a lot of ones in a way probably

767
00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:35,439
Speaker 1: weren't allowed to be super vulnerable either. And so this

768
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:39,600
Speaker 1: kind of zipped up persona that they really let on

769
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:43,560
Speaker 1: and lead with doesn't leave a lot of room again

770
00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:50,160
Speaker 1: for the kind of softer, squishy parts that could easily

771
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:53,200
Speaker 1: be wounded. You know, there's a lot of armoring up,

772
00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:56,320
Speaker 1: you know, for the type one as well. I always

773
00:44:56,360 --> 00:45:00,400
Speaker 1: love to encourage type ones to think an terms of

774
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:05,600
Speaker 1: excellence rather than perfection, and and you know, doing doing

775
00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:09,440
Speaker 1: your best, but not making it about perfection. You know,

776
00:45:09,520 --> 00:45:11,719
Speaker 1: it's what if that you know that quote is it

777
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:15,040
Speaker 1: Hemmingway or somebody that says, and now that you don't

778
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 1: have to be perfect, you can be good. I think

779
00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:21,239
Speaker 1: it is from East of Eden. But now that you

780
00:45:21,280 --> 00:45:23,600
Speaker 1: don't have to be perfect, you can be good, you know,

781
00:45:23,800 --> 00:45:26,279
Speaker 1: like it's okay, you don't have to make up your

782
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:28,480
Speaker 1: bed every single day in the morning right when you

783
00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:30,920
Speaker 1: get out of bed. You know you you can be

784
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,960
Speaker 1: five minutes late every once in a while, We're still

785
00:45:33,960 --> 00:45:36,160
Speaker 1: going to love you and before you yeah, you know.

786
00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:39,680
Speaker 1: I've heard multiple times that people who struggle with eating

787
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:43,480
Speaker 1: disorders fall in line with this type of the most.

788
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 1: Have you found that to be true or is that

789
00:45:46,280 --> 00:45:49,000
Speaker 1: just something that's floating on the internet. I've never read that,

790
00:45:49,239 --> 00:45:52,120
Speaker 1: but I could see that being true. The more restrictive

791
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 1: type of an eating disorder. Okay, I mean there's things

792
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:56,600
Speaker 1: that you've said in every single number we've gone through

793
00:45:56,640 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 1: so far that would lead somebody to any type of addiction.

794
00:45:59,400 --> 00:46:02,120
Speaker 1: And I view a needing disorder as a process addiction,

795
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:04,719
Speaker 1: and so it could be anything but this very like

796
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:07,640
Speaker 1: perfectionistic need to look this way, I need to look

797
00:46:07,719 --> 00:46:11,440
Speaker 1: the part probably falls more into the more susceptible, which

798
00:46:11,719 --> 00:46:14,959
Speaker 1: correct me if I'm wrong sevens go to one when

799
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:18,200
Speaker 1: they're in unhealth. Right. Well, I have a little bit

800
00:46:18,200 --> 00:46:21,880
Speaker 1: of a different take there. It is called for a

801
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:25,440
Speaker 1: lot of people call that like the stress point Type seven.

802
00:46:25,640 --> 00:46:28,319
Speaker 1: I think it's just a resource point, right, you know,

803
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:32,759
Speaker 1: when you start to get overly critical and perfectionistic. You know,

804
00:46:33,080 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 1: that's a wake up call, that's an invitation to practice

805
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:40,720
Speaker 1: some self compassion. That be direct. Right. So I don't

806
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 1: love the like disintegration integration language. I see every flow

807
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:50,840
Speaker 1: line and arrow as a resource, a resource point. So

808
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:55,680
Speaker 1: you know, I think that absolutely type ones provide like

809
00:46:55,800 --> 00:47:00,200
Speaker 1: that type. You know, if you really glean from the

810
00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:03,839
Speaker 1: higher side of the type one, you bring a lot

811
00:47:03,880 --> 00:47:08,279
Speaker 1: of you know, organization and follow through and you can

812
00:47:08,480 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 1: you can glean so much from that type. Also, it's

813
00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:17,960
Speaker 1: a great red flashing light you to say, oh wow,

814
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 1: there I go again. I'm doing that thing. I'm being

815
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:25,239
Speaker 1: overly critical of myself for others, I'm tending towards some perfectionism.

816
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 1: I need to choose something different. So I think it's

817
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 1: a great resource. So good one triad. Shall we go

818
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:41,239
Speaker 1: to the next. Yeah, let's let's dive into to the heart.

819
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:45,520
Speaker 1: Tryad too. Threason four's. Type two's often known as the helper,

820
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:51,719
Speaker 1: known as the befriender. Their attention goes to connections or

821
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:56,799
Speaker 1: alliances with people. There are the most relational people on

822
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,360
Speaker 1: the angiogram. Their attention goes to how can I be

823
00:47:59,440 --> 00:48:02,120
Speaker 1: liked right? How can I be accepted and loved? Um

824
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:08,239
Speaker 1: they're carrying relational generous people can be people pleasing and

825
00:48:08,440 --> 00:48:12,440
Speaker 1: often possessive as well. Type two's are driven by the

826
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:15,800
Speaker 1: needs to be needed. That's their unconscious motivation in life,

827
00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:19,520
Speaker 1: and they feel way more comfortable giving than receiving. They're

828
00:48:19,560 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 1: often totally unaware of their needs and how to get

829
00:48:23,239 --> 00:48:26,800
Speaker 1: their needs met. That is, if you have a loved

830
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:29,439
Speaker 1: one in your life, that's a type to ask them

831
00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:32,680
Speaker 1: what they need every single day, be curious about their

832
00:48:32,719 --> 00:48:36,879
Speaker 1: needs and desires. Two's really often suffer from poor boundaries

833
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:40,840
Speaker 1: because they know themselves so much. In relation to people

834
00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:46,280
Speaker 1: and unhealthy spaces, Type two's can be codependent and manipulative.

835
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:50,160
Speaker 1: Have you seen that show on um Netflix Dead to Me?

836
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:53,640
Speaker 1: Have you watched that? Oh my gosh, it's such a

837
00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 1: good series, but there is one of the main characters

838
00:48:57,160 --> 00:49:02,880
Speaker 1: is the poster child for an unhealthy too, so it's yeah, anyway,

839
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:05,040
Speaker 1: I'll just leave that there. They can often kind of

840
00:49:05,040 --> 00:49:08,440
Speaker 1: play the role of the martyr and healthy levels though

841
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:12,239
Speaker 1: Tight two's are gosh, they are the people that we

842
00:49:12,320 --> 00:49:16,279
Speaker 1: are most drawn to. They are just so incredibly lovable

843
00:49:16,360 --> 00:49:22,439
Speaker 1: and kind and warm, compassionate, and just intrinsically generous. They

844
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:26,719
Speaker 1: just are such such beautiful people inside and out. I mean,

845
00:49:26,800 --> 00:49:30,200
Speaker 1: it's just it's just amazing. I feel so my life

846
00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:33,200
Speaker 1: feels so much richer with my Type two friends. What

847
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:36,640
Speaker 1: I've heard that their superpower is they can walk into

848
00:49:36,680 --> 00:49:40,080
Speaker 1: a room and they can sense out like who needs something,

849
00:49:40,320 --> 00:49:43,640
Speaker 1: like they just know, which can be really hard to

850
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:47,839
Speaker 1: because I don't have that superpower, and I can walk

851
00:49:47,840 --> 00:49:51,239
Speaker 1: into a room and totally miss what somebody needs. And

852
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:53,960
Speaker 1: so if you are to and you're somebody who can

853
00:49:53,960 --> 00:49:55,439
Speaker 1: walk into a room and be like, oh, this person

854
00:49:55,480 --> 00:49:58,440
Speaker 1: needs this, it can be somewhat frustrating that nobody's doing

855
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,360
Speaker 1: that back to you because it makes sense in your head. Yeah,

856
00:50:01,480 --> 00:50:04,840
Speaker 1: and a lot of times where type two's get into trouble,

857
00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:09,400
Speaker 1: like you said, they give with the expectation of giving

858
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:13,040
Speaker 1: in return, either of quality time or or some kind

859
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:17,040
Speaker 1: of reciprocity. So yeah, two tooth can get into trouble.

860
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:19,319
Speaker 1: You know. Part of the encouragement and the work for

861
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:22,720
Speaker 1: Type twos is just to have boundaries around your generosity

862
00:50:22,880 --> 00:50:25,560
Speaker 1: and to give without an agenda. That's where some of

863
00:50:25,560 --> 00:50:28,480
Speaker 1: the manipulation can come in to focus. As part of

864
00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:32,200
Speaker 1: the feeling or heart triad, you know, the relationship. The

865
00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:36,960
Speaker 1: dominant emotion in the heart triad is sadness and grief,

866
00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:40,080
Speaker 1: and so, you know two's part of their work is

867
00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 1: to get in touch with their sadness and grief because

868
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:45,400
Speaker 1: they tend to be really cheery. Oftentimes that's reductive to

869
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:48,040
Speaker 1: say that they all are, but they oftentimes do appear

870
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 1: and present as really upbeat and positive a lot like sevens,

871
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:57,360
Speaker 1: accessing sadness and grief could again threaten that connection to

872
00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:00,520
Speaker 1: other people, you know, it can be off puting, or

873
00:51:00,560 --> 00:51:03,480
Speaker 1: so they think. So connecting to that those emotions is

874
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:06,359
Speaker 1: part of the deep work or Type twos, as well

875
00:51:06,440 --> 00:51:10,400
Speaker 1: as really connecting to their own personal and emotional needs.

876
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:16,240
Speaker 1: Type three is the achiever and Type threes are gosh,

877
00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:21,520
Speaker 1: they are kind of like the Arabian horse of the aniogram, right.

878
00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:26,120
Speaker 1: They know how to go. They're they're quite something. You know,

879
00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:29,120
Speaker 1: their attention goes to how to appear successful and how

880
00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:34,600
Speaker 1: to appear successful like steamlessly and what tasks need to

881
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:39,360
Speaker 1: be accomplished to appear successful. Right, So obviously success oriented,

882
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:44,479
Speaker 1: goal oriented. They're very adaptable, they're very very driven. They're

883
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:49,120
Speaker 1: probably the most image conscious people on the angiogram. They're

884
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:53,479
Speaker 1: they're unconscious. Motivation is the need to achieve, the need

885
00:51:53,560 --> 00:51:56,880
Speaker 1: to succeed. Threes are like the stars of the angiogram

886
00:51:56,960 --> 00:51:59,560
Speaker 1: and the healthy spaces. They are really looked up to

887
00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:04,440
Speaker 1: for their personal accomplishments and their graciousness. However, when threes

888
00:52:04,840 --> 00:52:09,480
Speaker 1: are super you know, an unhealthy spaces, they can almost

889
00:52:09,800 --> 00:52:13,919
Speaker 1: become kind of narcissistic and a little too hell bent

890
00:52:14,040 --> 00:52:17,279
Speaker 1: on success and and kind of become shallow. Is it

891
00:52:17,440 --> 00:52:21,840
Speaker 1: they want to be successful or look successful? Okay, I

892
00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:24,520
Speaker 1: think to do with success they want and you know,

893
00:52:24,680 --> 00:52:27,080
Speaker 1: they're not afraid to work to get there. These these

894
00:52:27,080 --> 00:52:29,480
Speaker 1: are the people that you know, literally like it's hard

895
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:32,920
Speaker 1: for them to go on vacation without taking their laptop

896
00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: because work is fun. Work equals fun for them, and

897
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:41,000
Speaker 1: so they have a hard time separating out work from life.

898
00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:44,680
Speaker 1: And yeah, they just gosh and they have a lot

899
00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:48,360
Speaker 1: a lot of energy. They live by the mantra you

900
00:52:48,440 --> 00:52:51,440
Speaker 1: are good, are okay as long as you appear successful

901
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:53,879
Speaker 1: and others think well of you, and we all know

902
00:52:54,400 --> 00:52:58,280
Speaker 1: kind of the problems how that can become really problematic.

903
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:01,759
Speaker 1: They have a huge love need, right they believe, and

904
00:53:01,960 --> 00:53:04,640
Speaker 1: as do really all the heart type that a huge

905
00:53:04,680 --> 00:53:07,160
Speaker 1: love need that did not talk about attachment, did not

906
00:53:07,560 --> 00:53:11,560
Speaker 1: get met in childhood. Garnering the love and approval of

907
00:53:11,600 --> 00:53:15,440
Speaker 1: whoever they're with by appearing successful is just where their

908
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:17,640
Speaker 1: attention goes all the time. How do they deal with

909
00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:21,960
Speaker 1: they're feeling? They basically serve as a speed bump, you know, right,

910
00:53:22,160 --> 00:53:25,200
Speaker 1: Like emotions are kind of like a speed bump. They

911
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:29,560
Speaker 1: just kind of slow them down totally. But threes are

912
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:34,160
Speaker 1: so feeling. They absolutely are feelers. They just don't feel

913
00:53:34,640 --> 00:53:38,239
Speaker 1: necessarily safe accessing those because they it's almost like if

914
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,719
Speaker 1: I do, I'll be overtaken. They don't. They need to

915
00:53:41,840 --> 00:53:45,480
Speaker 1: understand learn how to kind of manage their emotional experience,

916
00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:48,480
Speaker 1: go in and out without feeling like they're going to

917
00:53:48,600 --> 00:53:51,439
Speaker 1: be overwhelmed. I mean, I think that's probably a good

918
00:53:51,440 --> 00:53:54,080
Speaker 1: thing for all of us to do. But yes, threes

919
00:53:54,760 --> 00:53:59,120
Speaker 1: very much downplay their emotions. But this does not mean

920
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:02,080
Speaker 1: there's a myth that they not emotional. That's that's that's

921
00:54:02,160 --> 00:54:07,279
Speaker 1: not true. They're definitely feelers. They just distance themselves from

922
00:54:07,320 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 1: their feelings really for survival, because successes is survival for them,

923
00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:16,920
Speaker 1: and feelings are not there, They're gonna slow down that

924
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:20,600
Speaker 1: that process, that trajectory moving into fours. With a lot

925
00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:22,640
Speaker 1: of fours in your life, I don't have a lot

926
00:54:22,640 --> 00:54:25,279
Speaker 1: of fours in my life, a lot of four clients.

927
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:28,040
Speaker 1: But I just feel like you said, eights are misunderstood.

928
00:54:28,040 --> 00:54:31,439
Speaker 1: I feel like fours are so misunderstood. I think you're right, um,

929
00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:34,400
Speaker 1: And that's a big fear that type woars have. Fours

930
00:54:34,800 --> 00:54:39,200
Speaker 1: are especially very misunderstood in relationships. Yeah, I mean we

931
00:54:39,280 --> 00:54:41,879
Speaker 1: can be pretty difficult. I'm not gonna lie, like four

932
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:44,600
Speaker 1: really really tough. I mean we can all be tough,

933
00:54:44,680 --> 00:54:48,200
Speaker 1: but do I do think the drama component of fars

934
00:54:48,560 --> 00:54:51,240
Speaker 1: in relationship, if they're not operating in a healthy space,

935
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:54,840
Speaker 1: can be really difficult. And and hire some type fours

936
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:59,799
Speaker 1: the attention. They're called the romantic or idealist oftentimes often

937
00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:02,560
Speaker 1: times the artist that's I think that one of the

938
00:55:02,600 --> 00:55:05,919
Speaker 1: main myths for type fours that they're all creative, which

939
00:55:06,000 --> 00:55:10,560
Speaker 1: I think their self expression is as a very as

940
00:55:10,600 --> 00:55:16,160
Speaker 1: a valuable part of their experience and something they highly

941
00:55:16,239 --> 00:55:19,920
Speaker 1: highly value self expression. But their attention goes to kind

942
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:22,319
Speaker 1: of like kind of like the type um ones, their

943
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:25,000
Speaker 1: attention goes to what's missing in the moment or how

944
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:28,080
Speaker 1: this moment could be better or more perfect, you know,

945
00:55:28,280 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 1: and it's kind of like the grass is always greener.

946
00:55:31,160 --> 00:55:34,919
Speaker 1: Type fours really fall into that, right. They also their

947
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:38,520
Speaker 1: you know, their attention goes to what can be negative

948
00:55:38,560 --> 00:55:40,920
Speaker 1: in the present moment. So yeah, it can be a

949
00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:49,440
Speaker 1: real drag sensitive, creative, oftentimes pretty withdrawn, expressive, dramatic moody

950
00:55:49,719 --> 00:55:53,719
Speaker 1: bors can be very very moody and very motivated by

951
00:55:53,760 --> 00:55:57,840
Speaker 1: this need to be special and stand out and find significance,

952
00:55:58,160 --> 00:56:01,560
Speaker 1: you know, kind of beauty path is sorry, that's my

953
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:05,040
Speaker 1: my one year old and they're um squealing. Often called

954
00:56:05,160 --> 00:56:09,800
Speaker 1: like the individualist type, boars really have this need to

955
00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:13,359
Speaker 1: maintain their identity and and by seeing themselves as as

956
00:56:13,400 --> 00:56:16,960
Speaker 1: fundamentally different and that doesn't necessarily mean different in a

957
00:56:17,000 --> 00:56:20,840
Speaker 1: good way, just different kind of flawed and deficient. Boars

958
00:56:21,280 --> 00:56:26,080
Speaker 1: have just this rich emotional life, interior life. They can

959
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:31,200
Speaker 1: also really indulge those emotions and fall prey to hyper

960
00:56:31,719 --> 00:56:36,440
Speaker 1: you know, introspection and self absorption. Really, if we're not careful,

961
00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:40,719
Speaker 1: they can again fixate on what's missing and this they're

962
00:56:40,800 --> 00:56:44,320
Speaker 1: characterized by this deep sense of longing, right, this longing

963
00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:49,719
Speaker 1: for beauty and longing for wholeness and union with either

964
00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:53,120
Speaker 1: a place or a person or an ideal situation. There's

965
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:57,120
Speaker 1: this again pervasive feeling, like you said, of being misunderstood

966
00:56:57,120 --> 00:57:00,879
Speaker 1: for fours which can really result and isolate. So, like

967
00:57:00,920 --> 00:57:04,400
Speaker 1: you said, I think a lot of depression anxiety. It's

968
00:57:04,560 --> 00:57:07,840
Speaker 1: very common for type foars to to experience that along

969
00:57:07,840 --> 00:57:11,800
Speaker 1: the way. They do have strong kind of aesthetic sensibilities.

970
00:57:11,840 --> 00:57:14,560
Speaker 1: They pride themselves and that they pride themselves on being

971
00:57:14,640 --> 00:57:20,240
Speaker 1: extraordinary kind of avoiding anything to basic or pedestrian. Right,

972
00:57:20,480 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 1: I mean again I'm hearing myself talking cringing. We can

973
00:57:25,320 --> 00:57:28,800
Speaker 1: be lovely people, but no, so yes, those are tell

974
00:57:28,840 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 1: me what you're you're kind of experience with type foars

975
00:57:31,800 --> 00:57:35,400
Speaker 1: as clients. Well so well, I mean emotional. But then

976
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:37,880
Speaker 1: I think the hard time is accepting that this is

977
00:57:37,920 --> 00:57:41,320
Speaker 1: a good part of them, because I see a lot

978
00:57:41,360 --> 00:57:44,040
Speaker 1: of the beauty in the world like they're disdained towards

979
00:57:44,040 --> 00:57:47,480
Speaker 1: like basicness helps create a lot of what makes our

980
00:57:47,520 --> 00:57:50,360
Speaker 1: world so great and what keeps us moving. So we're

981
00:57:50,360 --> 00:57:52,600
Speaker 1: not all staying the same because there's fours out there

982
00:57:52,640 --> 00:57:54,520
Speaker 1: being like I don't want to be that way. So

983
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:56,280
Speaker 1: and then they create a trend, and then we go

984
00:57:56,320 --> 00:57:58,160
Speaker 1: to that trend and they create a new trend. And

985
00:57:58,240 --> 00:58:01,320
Speaker 1: so I think it's hard some times the labels that

986
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:04,160
Speaker 1: the world puts on somebody just from the characteristics of

987
00:58:04,200 --> 00:58:07,320
Speaker 1: the four type. But rather rather than being like, oh

988
00:58:07,360 --> 00:58:09,760
Speaker 1: I hate that I'm that way, there's parts that you

989
00:58:09,800 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 1: can embrace in that. And one of my favorite things

990
00:58:12,040 --> 00:58:14,520
Speaker 1: that I've heard about the indiogram is that these like

991
00:58:14,600 --> 00:58:18,080
Speaker 1: quote unquote negative qualities are the flip side of your

992
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:21,240
Speaker 1: the best parts about you totally. And so it's hard

993
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:25,720
Speaker 1: for it's my experience, been hard for force to be like, oh, yeah,

994
00:58:25,800 --> 00:58:28,120
Speaker 1: you're so right, what a great point. Thank you for

995
00:58:28,200 --> 00:58:31,680
Speaker 1: making a point. Yeah, I mean, just like anything, you know,

996
00:58:32,000 --> 00:58:36,080
Speaker 1: our our strength can also be our weakness. And it's

997
00:58:36,200 --> 00:58:38,920
Speaker 1: it's so true. I think sevens. I think your sevenths

998
00:58:38,920 --> 00:58:45,000
Speaker 1: are trend setters, you know, speaking of trend setters, Yes, absolutely, yeah,

999
00:58:45,040 --> 00:58:50,040
Speaker 1: that that beautiful kind of pathos and beauty. Like this

1000
00:58:50,400 --> 00:58:53,560
Speaker 1: fascination with paths and beauty and meaning and all of

1001
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:57,440
Speaker 1: this stuff can also be taken to a big stream

1002
00:58:57,520 --> 00:59:01,760
Speaker 1: with force compared with other is huge fall into the

1003
00:59:01,800 --> 00:59:05,200
Speaker 1: trap of envy. That's our kind of like the passion

1004
00:59:05,240 --> 00:59:08,480
Speaker 1: of the four's envy, which can often look like admiration,

1005
00:59:08,640 --> 00:59:11,120
Speaker 1: even you know, like me saying, oh my gosh, your

1006
00:59:11,120 --> 00:59:14,320
Speaker 1: hair is so awesome. I love it, you know, love

1007
00:59:14,320 --> 00:59:16,160
Speaker 1: your hair like that can be like a form of

1008
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:19,720
Speaker 1: envy almost for Type fours, Um, we mean well, but

1009
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:22,360
Speaker 1: we just have this constant kind of like, oh wow,

1010
00:59:22,440 --> 00:59:27,360
Speaker 1: that's so beautiful and moving along into this kind of

1011
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:31,240
Speaker 1: last but not least head center of intelligence, thinking center

1012
00:59:31,280 --> 00:59:34,480
Speaker 1: of intelligence and type fives, which to me are some

1013
00:59:34,560 --> 00:59:39,320
Speaker 1: of the most fascinating people in the world, like maybe one. Yeah,

1014
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:41,880
Speaker 1: I don't know if there's like a lesser number of

1015
00:59:41,880 --> 00:59:44,280
Speaker 1: fives in the world, but they just they feel like

1016
00:59:44,320 --> 00:59:48,360
Speaker 1: a rare a rare bird, and I love meeting fives.

1017
00:59:48,400 --> 00:59:52,200
Speaker 1: Their attention, they're all often called the observer or the investigator.

1018
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:57,600
Speaker 1: Their attention goes outward to observing or scanning, um often

1019
00:59:57,640 --> 01:00:01,760
Speaker 1: to their thinking capacities there. They're kind of interior castle

1020
01:00:01,960 --> 01:00:07,440
Speaker 1: is their mind. They are constantly hoovering up information, wanting

1021
01:00:07,480 --> 01:00:13,240
Speaker 1: to master all kinds of different subjects, from the stars

1022
01:00:13,800 --> 01:00:18,640
Speaker 1: to the animal kingdom to their favorite show is like

1023
01:00:18,840 --> 01:00:25,080
Speaker 1: how It's made right. Intense, cerebral, very perceptive, innovative, secretive,

1024
01:00:25,160 --> 01:00:29,080
Speaker 1: isolating vibes are really again motivated by that sense of

1025
01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:33,240
Speaker 1: mastery more than any other. Type five seek to understand

1026
01:00:33,360 --> 01:00:36,720
Speaker 1: why things are the way they are. And yeah, they're

1027
01:00:37,080 --> 01:00:40,560
Speaker 1: I mean Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Stephen Hawking. These are

1028
01:00:40,600 --> 01:00:43,480
Speaker 1: all really heavy hitters for the fives in terms of

1029
01:00:43,880 --> 01:00:47,520
Speaker 1: culture changers too. I mean, I think fives are often

1030
01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:50,360
Speaker 1: known for kind of like how nerdy, smart they are

1031
01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:53,600
Speaker 1: and innovative, and but often, I mean they really are

1032
01:00:53,680 --> 01:00:57,480
Speaker 1: culture changers. Healthy fives are able to manage a balance

1033
01:00:57,520 --> 01:01:03,240
Speaker 1: of energy between participation and observation, right. They do participate

1034
01:01:03,480 --> 01:01:06,360
Speaker 1: in the conversation when they're in a healthy space, and

1035
01:01:06,680 --> 01:01:10,600
Speaker 1: they engage with others comfortably, and they have an amazing

1036
01:01:10,600 --> 01:01:15,840
Speaker 1: ability to demonstrate neutrality. Really, but often very very introverted

1037
01:01:15,880 --> 01:01:19,800
Speaker 1: and very private vives really struggle with generosity. They can

1038
01:01:19,840 --> 01:01:25,160
Speaker 1: be stingy emotionally and um even materialistically, you know, they're

1039
01:01:25,280 --> 01:01:29,560
Speaker 1: again just brilliant, brilliant people. And their invitation is the

1040
01:01:29,680 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 1: emotional kind of rut they get in as greed kind

1041
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:36,920
Speaker 1: of again like saving up all their energy and making

1042
01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:40,800
Speaker 1: sure they have enough to to kind of last recording. Yeah,

1043
01:01:40,960 --> 01:01:43,440
Speaker 1: that's a great word for it. To average is another

1044
01:01:43,480 --> 01:01:46,120
Speaker 1: word for it. And and then the invitation here for

1045
01:01:46,160 --> 01:01:50,160
Speaker 1: the type five is non attachment, so not necessarily detaching,

1046
01:01:50,320 --> 01:01:55,479
Speaker 1: but having a non attachment to things or possessions and

1047
01:01:55,480 --> 01:01:57,760
Speaker 1: and just for like being able to open up and

1048
01:01:57,800 --> 01:02:02,080
Speaker 1: receive freely, give freely for nine fascinating people. Type six

1049
01:02:02,200 --> 01:02:06,200
Speaker 1: is the loyalist. They're awesome. I love I love, I

1050
01:02:06,360 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 1: love six. I always said that I want to marry

1051
01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:12,040
Speaker 1: a six. Oh you you should totally marry a six.

1052
01:02:12,080 --> 01:02:13,880
Speaker 1: I could. I can see that a good thing. I'm

1053
01:02:13,880 --> 01:02:17,080
Speaker 1: gonna be on the lookout for for a nice six

1054
01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:21,600
Speaker 1: chap would be worthy of you. So yeah. Type six

1055
01:02:21,680 --> 01:02:25,040
Speaker 1: is their attention goes to what could go wrong in

1056
01:02:25,160 --> 01:02:29,200
Speaker 1: any given situation, and they magnify that so they figuring

1057
01:02:29,360 --> 01:02:32,360
Speaker 1: things out and being prepared. They're kind of the boy

1058
01:02:32,360 --> 01:02:37,880
Speaker 1: scouts of the angiogram. They're always scanning They're committed, security oriented.

1059
01:02:37,920 --> 01:02:44,120
Speaker 1: They're very engaging, responsible, can be anxious, really gravitating, sometimes

1060
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:47,880
Speaker 1: an unhealthy spaces to paranoia. Type sixes are motivated by

1061
01:02:47,920 --> 01:02:51,439
Speaker 1: the need to be safe and secure, and they will

1062
01:02:51,520 --> 01:02:55,240
Speaker 1: display loyalty, oh my goodness to their friends and believe

1063
01:02:55,440 --> 01:02:58,800
Speaker 1: beyond any other type. We all need some good sixes

1064
01:02:58,800 --> 01:03:00,760
Speaker 1: on our teams. UM. They are the center of this

1065
01:03:00,920 --> 01:03:06,760
Speaker 1: thinking triad. So again, very cerebral and very others referencing

1066
01:03:07,120 --> 01:03:10,960
Speaker 1: very compliant. Six is basic fear is to be without support,

1067
01:03:11,200 --> 01:03:13,520
Speaker 1: to be without guidance, So they have a very interesting

1068
01:03:13,560 --> 01:03:17,200
Speaker 1: relationship with UM, with authority. They're kind of called worst

1069
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:20,320
Speaker 1: case scenario thinkers. If you call them a pessimist, they

1070
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:24,160
Speaker 1: will correct you immediately and tell you that their realist right.

1071
01:03:24,600 --> 01:03:28,520
Speaker 1: They don't like to find themselves in unpredictable situations. They

1072
01:03:28,560 --> 01:03:32,640
Speaker 1: really like to be prepared and healthy levels. They are

1073
01:03:32,760 --> 01:03:39,360
Speaker 1: super productive logical thinkers, always organized their thoughts around what

1074
01:03:39,440 --> 01:03:42,240
Speaker 1: would be the best case scenario for the for the

1075
01:03:42,320 --> 01:03:46,920
Speaker 1: common good. They're amazing team players. They're they're they're witty

1076
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:50,760
Speaker 1: and understanding and compassionate of others who I see sixes,

1077
01:03:51,040 --> 01:03:53,240
Speaker 1: especially when it comes to me because I'm like on

1078
01:03:53,280 --> 01:03:55,720
Speaker 1: the side where let's do everything, and let's do this,

1079
01:03:55,840 --> 01:03:57,720
Speaker 1: let's do that. I don't think through anything, and a

1080
01:03:57,840 --> 01:04:00,200
Speaker 1: sex is the person that's like standing at the door

1081
01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:02,520
Speaker 1: being like, wait, did you think this through? What about this?

1082
01:04:02,680 --> 01:04:04,800
Speaker 1: That essentially they're the reason the world has not like

1083
01:04:04,880 --> 01:04:08,520
Speaker 1: completely blown up totally. We still exist as a human

1084
01:04:08,560 --> 01:04:11,680
Speaker 1: species because of sixes. One. Yes, that's how I see them,

1085
01:04:11,680 --> 01:04:15,720
Speaker 1: And like I haven't like combusted because of my sixth friends.

1086
01:04:15,840 --> 01:04:19,320
Speaker 1: Very true, that's so so spot on A love it.

1087
01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:21,560
Speaker 1: I love it, I love it, I love it. I mean, yeah,

1088
01:04:21,840 --> 01:04:24,000
Speaker 1: we wouldn't be here, we would not be here as

1089
01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:26,600
Speaker 1: a species if it weren't with sixes. Okay, So for

1090
01:04:26,640 --> 01:04:29,080
Speaker 1: the sake of time, what is because we're gonna move

1091
01:04:29,080 --> 01:04:31,280
Speaker 1: to spend a second on seventh, But what is the

1092
01:04:31,440 --> 01:04:34,680
Speaker 1: six need to hear? What's their invitation? The invitation for

1093
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:39,760
Speaker 1: the six is faith to allow us to see their

1094
01:04:39,800 --> 01:04:44,560
Speaker 1: courage by living out of a space of of of

1095
01:04:44,600 --> 01:04:47,840
Speaker 1: having faith, of cultivating their faith. They don't have to

1096
01:04:47,840 --> 01:04:50,920
Speaker 1: have all the answers. And there's no there's no such

1097
01:04:50,920 --> 01:04:53,480
Speaker 1: thing as having all the all the answers, right, there's

1098
01:04:53,600 --> 01:05:00,240
Speaker 1: no way we can be completely secure in in certain right.

1099
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:04,640
Speaker 1: So so the invitation for type six is to cultivate

1100
01:05:04,880 --> 01:05:08,440
Speaker 1: your faith and it's okay to not have all the answers, right,

1101
01:05:08,560 --> 01:05:12,080
Speaker 1: It's okay to rely on other people. I love that

1102
01:05:12,120 --> 01:05:14,240
Speaker 1: for for six is because you know, it's like that

1103
01:05:14,440 --> 01:05:17,760
Speaker 1: saying that you know, courage is not the absence of fear,

1104
01:05:17,800 --> 01:05:23,360
Speaker 1: it is showing up despite your fear. And here I

1105
01:05:23,400 --> 01:05:25,640
Speaker 1: love that. Yeah, okay, now can we talk about seven.

1106
01:05:27,720 --> 01:05:30,520
Speaker 1: If we didn't talk about sevens, this would this would

1107
01:05:30,560 --> 01:05:33,720
Speaker 1: just not be half as fun. And that's kind of

1108
01:05:33,720 --> 01:05:36,360
Speaker 1: why I like to start with aids and end with sevens,

1109
01:05:36,520 --> 01:05:41,400
Speaker 1: because sevens they could easily, you know, get distracted and

1110
01:05:41,480 --> 01:05:44,439
Speaker 1: have kind of checked out. But I've left, I would

1111
01:05:44,440 --> 01:05:47,760
Speaker 1: have stopped this podcast. What you were you were out

1112
01:05:47,800 --> 01:05:52,720
Speaker 1: getting cocktail hour, if you're meeting your other seven friends

1113
01:05:52,720 --> 01:05:56,040
Speaker 1: doing something fabulous and drinking something bubbly, I love it. No,

1114
01:05:56,360 --> 01:05:59,280
Speaker 1: I love type seven so so much. My one of

1115
01:05:59,320 --> 01:06:02,120
Speaker 1: my absolute best friends in the whole wide world is

1116
01:06:02,280 --> 01:06:04,960
Speaker 1: seven and she just keeps me so grounded with her

1117
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:08,840
Speaker 1: positivity and I love it. Sevens often called the epicure

1118
01:06:09,160 --> 01:06:12,200
Speaker 1: or the enthusiast, or the avenger. Their attention and I

1119
01:06:12,240 --> 01:06:14,800
Speaker 1: can't wait to have you speak to the sevens. You know,

1120
01:06:14,840 --> 01:06:19,240
Speaker 1: they're your attention goes to planning and future based opportunities

1121
01:06:19,840 --> 01:06:24,120
Speaker 1: and plans whatever feels good. Their unconscious belief is that

1122
01:06:24,200 --> 01:06:27,200
Speaker 1: you are okay as long as you stay up and

1123
01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:30,800
Speaker 1: open right, your energy is up and open. Sevens are

1124
01:06:30,840 --> 01:06:36,080
Speaker 1: amazing entrepreneurs, podcast hosts. I mean, they're just really brilliant

1125
01:06:36,200 --> 01:06:39,840
Speaker 1: minds and thinkers, fast thinkers. I think sevens are the fastest,

1126
01:06:39,920 --> 01:06:44,000
Speaker 1: the most innovative thinkers on the angiogram. Very very optimistic.

1127
01:06:44,160 --> 01:06:47,480
Speaker 1: Sevens approach life with the sense of adventure and can

1128
01:06:47,520 --> 01:06:51,959
Speaker 1: do spirit and openness and curiosity, always planning the next

1129
01:06:52,000 --> 01:06:55,680
Speaker 1: great thing and and vacation or party or meal. They

1130
01:06:55,680 --> 01:07:00,280
Speaker 1: are collectors of friends, oh my goodness, very anticipatory. It's

1131
01:07:00,280 --> 01:07:04,680
Speaker 1: difficult sometimes for sevens to finish projects um or halths.

1132
01:07:04,880 --> 01:07:07,680
Speaker 1: It can be pretty pretty difficult, that's what you were describing.

1133
01:07:07,720 --> 01:07:11,400
Speaker 1: It's like enlisting some of those one qualities type one

1134
01:07:11,480 --> 01:07:14,960
Speaker 1: qualities or type six qualities. They do not like confrontation,

1135
01:07:15,040 --> 01:07:20,040
Speaker 1: typically heavy conversations. Very popular with lots of friends and people.

1136
01:07:20,360 --> 01:07:23,760
Speaker 1: They're the life of any party and healthy places. Type

1137
01:07:23,880 --> 01:07:29,120
Speaker 1: sevens are able to incorporate pain and disappointment into the

1138
01:07:29,120 --> 01:07:32,600
Speaker 1: whole of their lives and experiences and and rather than

1139
01:07:32,720 --> 01:07:37,840
Speaker 1: avoiding it. Right, so they're not only fun and adventurous,

1140
01:07:37,920 --> 01:07:42,120
Speaker 1: but they're also spiritually grounded people and practical and also

1141
01:07:42,400 --> 01:07:45,240
Speaker 1: very very resilient. I think that is the invitation for

1142
01:07:45,320 --> 01:07:48,920
Speaker 1: type sevens, is the resilience factor. You know, it's just

1143
01:07:48,960 --> 01:07:52,560
Speaker 1: such a superpower. I feel like for sevens, yes, tell

1144
01:07:52,600 --> 01:07:55,760
Speaker 1: me speak speak into I mean, I feel all of

1145
01:07:55,840 --> 01:07:58,240
Speaker 1: those things. I think that sevens are I mean, and

1146
01:07:58,320 --> 01:08:00,520
Speaker 1: we act this way, and that we we or looked

1147
01:08:00,520 --> 01:08:02,760
Speaker 1: at this way as it's like we're always fun all

1148
01:08:02,800 --> 01:08:05,800
Speaker 1: the time. Life is light, life is bubbly. It has been.

1149
01:08:06,120 --> 01:08:09,560
Speaker 1: I think the biggest struggle of becoming a therapist is

1150
01:08:09,680 --> 01:08:13,360
Speaker 1: my personality, and this in the sense it's super hard

1151
01:08:13,440 --> 01:08:16,599
Speaker 1: for me to center in like emotions that are hard

1152
01:08:16,640 --> 01:08:19,040
Speaker 1: to feel, which for me, emotion that's hard to feel,

1153
01:08:19,080 --> 01:08:23,400
Speaker 1: a sadness and hurt. Breakups have been way harder than

1154
01:08:23,439 --> 01:08:26,479
Speaker 1: I think this should be because feeling that kind of

1155
01:08:26,520 --> 01:08:29,160
Speaker 1: pain is something I'm not used to and I don't

1156
01:08:29,160 --> 01:08:31,320
Speaker 1: know what it's going to end. I'm not so much

1157
01:08:31,360 --> 01:08:34,120
Speaker 1: excited about like a trip I'm excited about the fact

1158
01:08:34,160 --> 01:08:36,280
Speaker 1: that I have something to look forward to, and so

1159
01:08:36,479 --> 01:08:39,120
Speaker 1: in breakups, they've been really hard because I don't know

1160
01:08:39,160 --> 01:08:41,639
Speaker 1: when that pain is gonna go away, so I can't

1161
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:44,360
Speaker 1: have something to look forward to. And people are so

1162
01:08:44,439 --> 01:08:47,880
Speaker 1: important to me like I do have, and I've worked

1163
01:08:47,920 --> 01:08:50,240
Speaker 1: on this of trying to make my circle smaller almost,

1164
01:08:50,439 --> 01:08:53,760
Speaker 1: but I have so many friends and people are so

1165
01:08:53,800 --> 01:08:57,160
Speaker 1: important to me. Relationships are so important to me, So

1166
01:08:57,200 --> 01:09:00,240
Speaker 1: I want to make everybody happy because when I'm happy,

1167
01:09:00,280 --> 01:09:03,040
Speaker 1: and then when I just want to be sad, I

1168
01:09:03,080 --> 01:09:06,760
Speaker 1: feel guilty almost. I'm thinking back to one specific time

1169
01:09:06,760 --> 01:09:08,599
Speaker 1: in my life where I went through a breakup and

1170
01:09:08,800 --> 01:09:11,120
Speaker 1: I just heard over and over, you're not yourself, You're

1171
01:09:11,120 --> 01:09:14,000
Speaker 1: not yourself. And when I did become myself again, people

1172
01:09:14,040 --> 01:09:16,200
Speaker 1: were like, I'm so glad she's back, and that was

1173
01:09:16,600 --> 01:09:20,120
Speaker 1: very meaningful to me. But also it's hard because I

1174
01:09:20,200 --> 01:09:22,800
Speaker 1: already have a hard time being sad, and so then

1175
01:09:22,840 --> 01:09:24,559
Speaker 1: it's like, on top of that, I feel so I mean,

1176
01:09:24,560 --> 01:09:26,479
Speaker 1: I could talk about being a seven all day long,

1177
01:09:26,560 --> 01:09:29,320
Speaker 1: but what I think I want most people to see

1178
01:09:29,439 --> 01:09:32,160
Speaker 1: is it's great to be a seven. I would not

1179
01:09:32,360 --> 01:09:35,200
Speaker 1: choose to trade my number and it's it has pain

1180
01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:38,400
Speaker 1: points and we're also I think every number has areas

1181
01:09:38,400 --> 01:09:42,480
Speaker 1: where they're misunderstood. And if you are somebody who envies

1182
01:09:42,720 --> 01:09:45,920
Speaker 1: somebody who is a different tight or envies being a seven.

1183
01:09:46,320 --> 01:09:49,040
Speaker 1: I am the parts of all of the numbers and

1184
01:09:49,160 --> 01:09:51,439
Speaker 1: things that I wish I could gravitate towards. Now what

1185
01:09:51,520 --> 01:09:54,240
Speaker 1: I trade who I am? No, the reputation of thinking

1186
01:09:54,240 --> 01:09:56,880
Speaker 1: we're the best number, and I don't feel that all

1187
01:09:56,920 --> 01:09:59,760
Speaker 1: the time. Yeah, I think sevens. There's a lot of

1188
01:09:59,800 --> 01:10:05,080
Speaker 1: mis conceptions about sevens, you know, And I do think sevens,

1189
01:10:05,479 --> 01:10:08,920
Speaker 1: you know, I've I've even heard people say sevens are

1190
01:10:08,960 --> 01:10:13,519
Speaker 1: actually not the most optimistic. They're the most pessimistic because

1191
01:10:13,800 --> 01:10:19,040
Speaker 1: they're so afraid to go to that place of being

1192
01:10:19,479 --> 01:10:22,920
Speaker 1: sad or being in pain, because they're so afraid of

1193
01:10:22,960 --> 01:10:25,479
Speaker 1: what that could be like. You know, So a lot

1194
01:10:25,600 --> 01:10:27,879
Speaker 1: a lot of times, you know, you've heard this phrase,

1195
01:10:28,040 --> 01:10:32,880
Speaker 1: especially recently, toxic positive positivity. I think sevens can kind

1196
01:10:32,880 --> 01:10:38,280
Speaker 1: of nark out almost on positivity. Well, And going to

1197
01:10:38,439 --> 01:10:41,280
Speaker 1: therapy has been so hard because I don't want to

1198
01:10:41,280 --> 01:10:44,719
Speaker 1: sit in that stuff and talk about gravitating towards addiction

1199
01:10:44,720 --> 01:10:47,200
Speaker 1: and numbing. But I mean we could go on forever.

1200
01:10:47,479 --> 01:10:52,479
Speaker 1: You know, the invitation or virtue is sobriety. And I

1201
01:10:52,520 --> 01:10:54,800
Speaker 1: would say again, just kind of like the lust for

1202
01:10:54,960 --> 01:10:57,320
Speaker 1: Type AID, it's not that's not a sexual lust. It's

1203
01:10:57,360 --> 01:11:01,759
Speaker 1: not like an alcohol sobriety it's just basically like being

1204
01:11:02,400 --> 01:11:08,120
Speaker 1: sober in your experience, you know, being awake and present presence.

1205
01:11:08,320 --> 01:11:10,559
Speaker 1: You know. I wish we had time to really go

1206
01:11:10,600 --> 01:11:14,000
Speaker 1: into all of the kind of opportunities for every type,

1207
01:11:14,040 --> 01:11:18,439
Speaker 1: but for Type seven, the opportunity is just to take

1208
01:11:18,520 --> 01:11:22,880
Speaker 1: up space in the present moment, to really really move around,

1209
01:11:23,200 --> 01:11:27,080
Speaker 1: allow yourself to feel the present moment and not trying

1210
01:11:27,120 --> 01:11:30,400
Speaker 1: to get ten steps out run your pain, you know,

1211
01:11:30,479 --> 01:11:32,439
Speaker 1: but just to be in there. But I think it

1212
01:11:32,520 --> 01:11:37,880
Speaker 1: takes a very evolved Type seven to be at the arapist.

1213
01:11:38,120 --> 01:11:41,480
Speaker 1: I would say it takes someone that I mean, wouldn't

1214
01:11:41,000 --> 01:11:45,519
Speaker 1: you trying a lot of like sitting in pain. For

1215
01:11:45,640 --> 01:11:49,000
Speaker 1: Type like, it's just there's a lot of heaviness, and

1216
01:11:49,040 --> 01:11:51,040
Speaker 1: I think it takes a lot of a lot of

1217
01:11:51,040 --> 01:11:53,719
Speaker 1: sobriety for Type sevens to be able to do that.

1218
01:11:54,040 --> 01:11:57,080
Speaker 1: I mean, for afore, it's like the water we swim in.

1219
01:11:57,240 --> 01:12:03,080
Speaker 1: It's so dreamy, right, dark oceans telling me over the top,

1220
01:12:03,200 --> 01:12:05,519
Speaker 1: but I think for Time seven's it can be you know,

1221
01:12:05,800 --> 01:12:09,080
Speaker 1: difficult on the on the other extreme, yeah, totally so

1222
01:12:09,240 --> 01:12:11,680
Speaker 1: thank you so much and I appreciate you and this

1223
01:12:11,840 --> 01:12:15,000
Speaker 1: was so fun. Bye okay by