1
00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:00,960
Speaker 1: Speaks to the planet.

2
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:02,560
Speaker 2: I'll go by the name of Charlamagne of God and

3
00:00:02,560 --> 00:00:04,920
Speaker 2: guess what, I can't wait to see y'all at the

4
00:00:04,960 --> 00:00:08,319
Speaker 2: third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. That's right, We're coming

5
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:11,360
Speaker 2: back to Atlanta, Georgia, Saturday, April twenty six at Poeman

6
00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,840
Speaker 2: Yards and it's hosted by none other than Decisions, Decisions,

7
00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:17,560
Speaker 2: Mandy B and Weezy. Okay, we got the R and

8
00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:20,319
Speaker 2: B Money Podcast with taking Jay Valentine. You got the

9
00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:22,919
Speaker 2: Woman of All Podcasts with Sarah Jake Roberts. We got

10
00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:25,479
Speaker 2: Good Mom's Bad Choices. Carrie Champion will be there with

11
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:28,440
Speaker 2: her next sports podcast and the Trap Nerds podcast with

12
00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:31,200
Speaker 2: more to be announced. And of course it's bigger than podcasts.

13
00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:34,160
Speaker 2: We're bringing the Black Effect Marketplace with black owned businesses

14
00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:37,400
Speaker 2: plus the food truck court to keep you fed while

15
00:00:37,400 --> 00:00:38,919
Speaker 2: you visit us. All right, listen, you.

16
00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:40,519
Speaker 1: Don't want to miss this.

17
00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:43,320
Speaker 2: Tap in and grab your tickets now at Black Effect

18
00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:45,479
Speaker 2: dot Com Flash Podcast Festival.

19
00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:49,000
Speaker 1: If you would like to have us answer your questions.

20
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:52,519
Speaker 3: And you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or

21
00:00:52,560 --> 00:01:00,760
Speaker 3: a terrible throuffle, guess what you've got, Decisions, You've always

22
00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:01,760
Speaker 3: got Decisions.

23
00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:04,640
Speaker 1: Welcome y'all to another You've got the SI.

24
00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:09,280
Speaker 3: Send in your questions to us Decisions Pod at gmail

25
00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,200
Speaker 3: dot com. We want to know what the fuck is

26
00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:12,920
Speaker 3: going on with you? What's the see which a baby dady?

27
00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:13,920
Speaker 3: What's this see with Eniggy?

28
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:16,080
Speaker 1: You like? What's the sea with the bitches fighting with it? Word?

29
00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:18,280
Speaker 1: We're gonna tell you what your decisions are gonna be.

30
00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:19,080
Speaker 1: That's right.

31
00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:23,600
Speaker 3: And this one is really interesting because there's a lot

32
00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:28,039
Speaker 3: of exclamation points in the goddamn title, and she pretty

33
00:01:28,080 --> 00:01:31,559
Speaker 3: much admitted that at this point she's desperate. So let's

34
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:35,440
Speaker 3: get right into this week's letter just that I'm desperate

35
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:36,319
Speaker 3: at this point.

36
00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:40,319
Speaker 1: So first of all, I love the show. Even if I.

37
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:43,000
Speaker 3: Don't agree with everything you ladies say, I can honestly

38
00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:45,880
Speaker 3: say I have learned so much about myself, most importantly,

39
00:01:46,120 --> 00:01:48,640
Speaker 3: how to navigate this world, keep an open mind, and

40
00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:51,120
Speaker 3: maybe give a little head or something to feel better.

41
00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:55,000
Speaker 3: All jokes aside, I really appreciate the show and staff. Okay,

42
00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:57,120
Speaker 3: now that I glaze y'all up, let's get to the

43
00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:00,480
Speaker 3: motherfucking teat. I'm a twenty five year old blocklack woman

44
00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,920
Speaker 3: with locks down my back and a thick ass to match.

45
00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:07,559
Speaker 3: I have been openly dating men and women for about

46
00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:10,560
Speaker 3: four years now. Over the past few months, about three

47
00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:13,280
Speaker 3: to four, I've been talking to this woman that's a

48
00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:14,200
Speaker 3: year younger than me.

49
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:16,280
Speaker 1: She made it clear that.

50
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:19,040
Speaker 3: She was by, but I didn't mind because I consider

51
00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:21,600
Speaker 3: myself by as well, even though I've.

52
00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:23,440
Speaker 1: Only been with like two to three guys.

53
00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:24,040
Speaker 2: Loo.

54
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:30,040
Speaker 3: Anyways, she is beautiful, an educated black woman in that

55
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:33,800
Speaker 3: ass who She's even thicker than me. My attraction to

56
00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:37,880
Speaker 3: her is undeniable. We have really good chemistry, go out together,

57
00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:42,400
Speaker 3: even some healthy PDA, but we have not fucked.

58
00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:45,000
Speaker 1: In fact, she won't fuck first.

59
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:46,880
Speaker 3: She told me she wanted to wait about a month

60
00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:51,160
Speaker 3: of us talking before we get sexual, but would initiate

61
00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:53,720
Speaker 3: all of our makeout sessions right before bed.

62
00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:55,280
Speaker 1: It might even slip a finger at me.

63
00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:57,800
Speaker 3: When I try to return the favor or take it

64
00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:00,000
Speaker 3: to the next level, she would tell me your head

65
00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,600
Speaker 3: or just completely tell me to stop. I really like her,

66
00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:05,919
Speaker 3: but I'm starting to feel bad because I want to

67
00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:09,160
Speaker 3: have sex but she doesn't. Having a good amount of

68
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,840
Speaker 3: sex with a partner is really important to me. It's

69
00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:14,240
Speaker 3: kind of making me want to move on. Am I

70
00:03:14,280 --> 00:03:15,520
Speaker 3: wrong for thinking that way?

71
00:03:15,960 --> 00:03:17,800
Speaker 1: Is it too soon? Please help?

72
00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:20,520
Speaker 3: I don't know how we're going to fill in the

73
00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:23,959
Speaker 3: needed time for this episode because the girl's not that gay,

74
00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:29,480
Speaker 3: So I disagree. I think kind of like me and

75
00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:32,200
Speaker 3: and maybe in terms of speaking more from a polydynamic

76
00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:37,240
Speaker 3: when whether you're bisexual or not, and I think what

77
00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:42,200
Speaker 3: we've talked about me being bisexual, heater romantic. There's maybe

78
00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:45,440
Speaker 3: something that she's looking for in a woman. Her identifying

79
00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:49,560
Speaker 3: as bisexual may mean she enjoys the softness of women.

80
00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:53,160
Speaker 3: She enjoys like being a round woman. She enjoys the

81
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:56,120
Speaker 3: care of a woman, the thoughtfulness that women bring. But

82
00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,720
Speaker 3: maybe she still just wants dick. So maybe she had

83
00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:02,880
Speaker 3: as she may identify as by not that gay, I

84
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:03,960
Speaker 3: don't want to use that with.

85
00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:06,880
Speaker 1: Us, I feel. I mean, I'm being facetious. I'm making jokes.

86
00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:07,920
Speaker 1: You can make the jokes.

87
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:10,680
Speaker 3: I just want to I want to say that this

88
00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:15,120
Speaker 3: woman wanting sex, this other woman, though she identifies as bisexual,

89
00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:18,800
Speaker 3: may genuinely like women but not want to have sex

90
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,920
Speaker 3: with them. I think the same way, like, then you're

91
00:04:20,960 --> 00:04:25,520
Speaker 3: not that gay if you don't want to fuck women,

92
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:30,400
Speaker 3: but you like being around them you are literacy, not

93
00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:33,360
Speaker 3: that gay. But also she fingers and makes out with

94
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,360
Speaker 3: her and doesn't want to be touched. There's a lot

95
00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:36,640
Speaker 3: of no touch me lesbians.

96
00:04:36,839 --> 00:04:38,200
Speaker 1: Doesn't make them man less Leslians.

97
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:40,120
Speaker 3: They don't want to be hang out with you and

98
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:43,080
Speaker 3: under and fingering is happening. She doesn't want to be fingered.

99
00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:46,919
Speaker 3: She says that of times slipsy I will also say

100
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:50,719
Speaker 3: just to not and not to super seriousness up. But

101
00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:56,200
Speaker 3: if she's fingering you, making out with you, and stopping

102
00:04:56,279 --> 00:05:00,719
Speaker 3: everything when you go to advance, I would be curious

103
00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:03,560
Speaker 3: to know if you've had a deep conversation to if

104
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:06,520
Speaker 3: there's any trauma associated with that. I know that, like

105
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:12,800
Speaker 3: I was talking to King Noir, and fingering specifically is

106
00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:16,159
Speaker 3: something that he's like. Not every woman likes. I think

107
00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:19,760
Speaker 3: when we're young, fingering because of something fun that if

108
00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:22,600
Speaker 3: the wrong person does it, if it hurts the first time,

109
00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:25,480
Speaker 3: if someone is aggressive and doing it wrong, it's not

110
00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:29,000
Speaker 3: what I think. Fingering is something that a lot of

111
00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:32,400
Speaker 3: women don't like. Fingering is something that I think I

112
00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:35,320
Speaker 3: normally actually have to ask for, even for men. So

113
00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:38,799
Speaker 3: if she's stopping you from fingering her, but she's advancing

114
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:39,200
Speaker 3: that with you.

115
00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:42,120
Speaker 1: It's not just fingers. That's not what lesbian sex is

116
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:43,680
Speaker 1: all about. No, no, no, of course it's not.

117
00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:46,200
Speaker 3: But she only mentioned that they make out and they

118
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:48,560
Speaker 3: get to finger, like she fingers her and she allows it,

119
00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:51,120
Speaker 3: but as soon as she goes to finger her, the

120
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:51,680
Speaker 3: girl stop.

121
00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:53,920
Speaker 1: I actually don't. I didn't hear that at all.

122
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:56,279
Speaker 3: I mean, if someone is slipping in a finger once

123
00:05:56,400 --> 00:06:00,159
Speaker 3: or twice, it just means she's trying to keep this

124
00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:01,960
Speaker 3: at bay so that the girl doesn't ask for more

125
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:02,719
Speaker 3: and maybe touch.

126
00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:04,960
Speaker 1: That's not a full on or it doesn't sound like

127
00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:06,640
Speaker 1: they've had sex. No, they haven't.

128
00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:10,159
Speaker 3: For lesbians, fingering is sex. So she said slip a

129
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:12,400
Speaker 3: finger in. No, she didn't say slip a finger. You

130
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:15,440
Speaker 3: said the close finger. Yes, the girl will finger that's

131
00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:17,640
Speaker 3: what lesbian sex is. So if the girl was really

132
00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:22,000
Speaker 3: going in, that's considered sex. But she's not because she's

133
00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:25,520
Speaker 3: not trying to have lesbian sex. There is a or

134
00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:28,760
Speaker 3: that's weird because I don't consider fingering sex that's what

135
00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,000
Speaker 3: lesbians do. I mean, you want to fuck your girl,

136
00:06:31,400 --> 00:06:33,960
Speaker 3: and you guys are let's just say out and it's

137
00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:35,479
Speaker 3: quick and you're in a bathroom, or you're in a

138
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,440
Speaker 3: movie theater. You could get fucked in the movie theater.

139
00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:41,320
Speaker 3: That's you consider fingering sex with men? No, I consider

140
00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,960
Speaker 3: dick and penetrative sex. That's how we define sex with men.

141
00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:50,440
Speaker 3: Right with women, it's a vaginal rubbing, oral or fingering.

142
00:06:50,800 --> 00:06:54,279
Speaker 3: So I mean all of my lesbian friends, either that

143
00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:57,400
Speaker 3: are married to women or in gay relationships, they talk

144
00:06:57,440 --> 00:07:00,240
Speaker 3: about how they just fucked it was hands actually, person

145
00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:02,960
Speaker 3: our Net shout out to her. Her book Mostly Dead

146
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:07,400
Speaker 3: Things really great depiction of lesbian sex because it's a

147
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:10,600
Speaker 3: lot of hand movement, talking about risk, thrusting, bucking someone

148
00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:11,920
Speaker 3: on the edge of like or in the back of

149
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:16,400
Speaker 3: a car. Like, that's lesbian sex. All lesbians listening, you know,

150
00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:18,640
Speaker 3: can feel free to comment. But yes, this is how

151
00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:22,480
Speaker 3: we define sex. I think alternatively, I've dated this girl.

152
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,760
Speaker 3: This girl likes kissing, hanging out, and the woman energy.

153
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:29,320
Speaker 3: Like you said, however, she's not that gay. That's not bisexual,

154
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:31,240
Speaker 3: and I'm kind of tired of the trope of like

155
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:35,680
Speaker 3: I kissed the girl once, so I'm bisexual. Like fluidity

156
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:39,360
Speaker 3: is different, enjoying sexual experience is different, much like if

157
00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,880
Speaker 3: a dude I know kissed the guy once but doesn't

158
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,760
Speaker 3: want to have sex with him, didn't like it. I

159
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,960
Speaker 3: wouldn't call him bisexual because he's not really pursuing anything.

160
00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,520
Speaker 1: I think this is super fake.

161
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,760
Speaker 3: I think that's why you're frustrated because there's no real

162
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:59,400
Speaker 3: explanation there. And most times people that are getting into

163
00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:03,720
Speaker 3: relationship with the opposite sex and call themselves bisexual.

164
00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:05,120
Speaker 1: Consistently have this issue.

165
00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:08,000
Speaker 3: This is why lesbians don't like to date by sexual women,

166
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:10,640
Speaker 3: because they be playing games, and this girl really sounds

167
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,800
Speaker 3: like she's playing games. If you're not ready to go

168
00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,240
Speaker 3: the whole way, don't even just touch me down there,

169
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,120
Speaker 3: like say that you're not.

170
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:17,920
Speaker 1: Ready to have sex.

171
00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:22,400
Speaker 3: Instead, she uses the excuses because she's not that gay.

172
00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:25,520
Speaker 3: I think the other thing that sucks is when girls

173
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:29,320
Speaker 3: are interested and they have been with women that have

174
00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:32,679
Speaker 3: more experience. I just I experienced this a lot, and

175
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:34,960
Speaker 3: they don't know what to do. They're very scared they're

176
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,959
Speaker 3: going to be bad, and so they just continue to

177
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:38,680
Speaker 3: avoid it. But they only want to make out because

178
00:08:38,760 --> 00:08:41,560
Speaker 3: making how a safe Yeah, my answer is she's not

179
00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:42,000
Speaker 3: that gay.

180
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:43,760
Speaker 1: No matter how I love the show. Get to get

181
00:08:43,760 --> 00:08:46,280
Speaker 1: different answers from me because I couldn't disagree more. I

182
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,880
Speaker 1: feel like I've said the same. No, I didn't, but

183
00:08:48,920 --> 00:08:51,360
Speaker 1: it's fine. I love that. This is why people send

184
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:51,959
Speaker 1: an answers.

185
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:57,040
Speaker 3: I think we align in some places and disalign in others.

186
00:08:57,200 --> 00:09:02,080
Speaker 3: This for me, having had during the writing process, have

187
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:07,559
Speaker 3: my bisexuality questioned, even in the editing process of my book,

188
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:11,760
Speaker 3: I guess I know we go by labels, but there's

189
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,560
Speaker 3: so many ways in which I, as someone can enjoy

190
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:18,120
Speaker 3: doing something sexual with someone else them not wanting them

191
00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:20,120
Speaker 3: to do the same. So I say that because I

192
00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:23,200
Speaker 3: don't like head. I love eating a bitchess pussy, I

193
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,240
Speaker 3: absolutely love it. I'm someone who don't who doesn't enjoy

194
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:27,840
Speaker 3: receiving oral so.

195
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:29,680
Speaker 1: I am.

196
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:32,560
Speaker 3: I would not like to be called not that gay

197
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:35,680
Speaker 3: or not that bisexual because of the way women engage

198
00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:38,320
Speaker 3: in sex. I actually don't want to receive what you

199
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:42,199
Speaker 3: have to offer me anytime. I've even mostly had threesomes

200
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,400
Speaker 3: with women, I do all the work for them.

201
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:46,320
Speaker 1: I don't care outside of making out.

202
00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:49,720
Speaker 3: I genuinely also, because I don't like head, do not

203
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,480
Speaker 3: care for the woman to engage with me.

204
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,800
Speaker 1: It doesn't make my sexuality any less.

205
00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:56,440
Speaker 3: Buy that that is a sexual act that I don't

206
00:09:56,520 --> 00:09:59,480
Speaker 3: enjoy having no, But.

207
00:09:59,440 --> 00:09:59,959
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying.

208
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:04,520
Speaker 3: You said sex with women is oral making out and fingering.

209
00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:07,360
Speaker 3: I'm saying if I'm having sex with a woman and

210
00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:11,160
Speaker 3: I don't do the scissoring, I already said that doesn't

211
00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:14,320
Speaker 3: make sense to see at all. My point, she was

212
00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:17,480
Speaker 3: fingering the one girl she didn't want it. Read it again,

213
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:21,840
Speaker 3: figuring is slipping a finger in someone's pussy, But she

214
00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:25,280
Speaker 3: would initiate all of our makeout sessions right before bed

215
00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:29,360
Speaker 3: and even slip a finger in to me if fingering

216
00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:32,640
Speaker 3: is a part of sex. What I'm saying is and

217
00:10:32,679 --> 00:10:34,960
Speaker 3: why I disagree with your take, which is fine because

218
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,840
Speaker 3: all of the listeners can receive this information differently, which

219
00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:40,880
Speaker 3: is what I love about Potting. What I'm saying is

220
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,440
Speaker 3: it does not make me any less bisexual that when

221
00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:46,920
Speaker 3: I'm in her, when I'm having sex with a woman,

222
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,280
Speaker 3: I don't want them to do anything to me, which

223
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,320
Speaker 3: this is what's happening here. The way the woman's frustration

224
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:54,880
Speaker 3: is when she wants to actually give it back to

225
00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:58,880
Speaker 3: the girl, she doesn't want to receive it. I apologize

226
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:01,640
Speaker 3: for any woman I've had sex with who I eat

227
00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,720
Speaker 3: her pussy out and maybe she wants to and I'm like, no,

228
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:06,480
Speaker 3: I'm good. That has literally happened time and time again

229
00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:08,719
Speaker 3: and again. I don't go on dates with women. I

230
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:11,839
Speaker 3: don't do all those things, but I identify as bisexual.

231
00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:13,800
Speaker 3: I wish a bitch would come up to me and

232
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:16,400
Speaker 3: be like, h you're not that gay. Okay, whatever you

233
00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:19,000
Speaker 3: can you can really isn't relevant to the things that

234
00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:23,400
Speaker 3: you do at all. Because no touch lesbians are having

235
00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:24,520
Speaker 3: some form of misatic I.

236
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,079
Speaker 1: Brought that up too, the no touch lesbians.

237
00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:29,199
Speaker 3: They are not no touch lesbians. This is we don't

238
00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,120
Speaker 3: know this girl. No what I'm saying, this isn't a

239
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:32,480
Speaker 3: no touch lesbian situation.

240
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:33,320
Speaker 1: We don't know.

241
00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:36,439
Speaker 3: They've been talking for a month, so to me, maybe

242
00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:39,800
Speaker 3: that conversation hasn't been had. She feels like she's being rejected.

243
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:43,400
Speaker 3: I think it would be safe to say, Hey, so

244
00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,360
Speaker 3: I've tried to figure you a few times now and

245
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:46,800
Speaker 3: you either tell me to stop or I feel like

246
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:49,800
Speaker 3: you're making excuses. Why do you not want to be touched?

247
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,000
Speaker 3: Do you not want to go that? She just feels

248
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,600
Speaker 3: like she's rejected right now. She hasn't gotten real answers,

249
00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:58,240
Speaker 3: and I feel like maybe because you feel rejected right now,

250
00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:00,880
Speaker 3: I think you need to talk to her and see, Hey,

251
00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:03,160
Speaker 3: so you don't want me to finger you, but can

252
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:06,160
Speaker 3: I eat your pussy? Like? I want to please you

253
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:07,840
Speaker 3: and I feel like I haven't been able to do

254
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:11,400
Speaker 3: that why And it's also not getting more from this girl.

255
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:15,120
Speaker 3: There's no orl like. That's why I said, so ask hey,

256
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:17,560
Speaker 3: I'm not allowed to finger you back when you finger me?

257
00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:20,920
Speaker 1: Can I eat your pussy? I really want to do pussy?

258
00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:23,800
Speaker 3: And all of these questions should be add so instead

259
00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:26,440
Speaker 3: of you feeling rejected and writing in and saying you're

260
00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:29,640
Speaker 3: desperate because you don't understand why this woman isn't going there?

261
00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:33,439
Speaker 1: Have you talked to her? Have you had the conversation.

262
00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:43,040
Speaker 3: About what her relationships with women look like? I've literally

263
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:45,079
Speaker 3: invited and I've shared this on the pod. I don't

264
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:49,400
Speaker 3: know how many years ago I was entertaining another bisexual woman.

265
00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:52,640
Speaker 3: She came over to my house. We were watching TV.

266
00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:56,160
Speaker 3: She was naked. We started cuddling. I go to rub

267
00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:59,480
Speaker 3: on her and she made me stop and I was like, well, bitch,

268
00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:00,520
Speaker 3: you naked with my bed.

269
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,880
Speaker 1: I'm confused. She wanted me to take her out to

270
00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:04,000
Speaker 1: the movies.

271
00:13:04,559 --> 00:13:06,600
Speaker 3: She literally was like, I don't want to have sex

272
00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:08,880
Speaker 3: until you take me out to the movies. And I

273
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,120
Speaker 3: was like, well, gir you could put your clothes on,

274
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:13,240
Speaker 3: because to me, though I'm bisexual, I don't want to

275
00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:13,600
Speaker 3: date you.

276
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:15,400
Speaker 1: I don't want to take you will stand up for like,

277
00:13:15,640 --> 00:13:17,000
Speaker 1: you know, a one or two night thing.

278
00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:21,320
Speaker 3: I think with the level they're at hanging out PDA, yeah,

279
00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:25,319
Speaker 3: enjoying each other's company for this amount of time. Yeah,

280
00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:28,760
Speaker 3: I've been down this roads a hundred times, you know,

281
00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:32,000
Speaker 3: romantic relationships with women, and this is what I've seen.

282
00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:35,000
Speaker 1: I would say the rejection.

283
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,240
Speaker 3: We have to stop thinking that at certain points the

284
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:41,839
Speaker 3: rejection is really about us, because why would people spend

285
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:43,840
Speaker 3: this much time with you if there was a true

286
00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:47,040
Speaker 3: rejection there. I totally get the feeling because I remember,

287
00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:48,840
Speaker 3: if you've been listening to the show for a while.

288
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:52,000
Speaker 3: A few years ago, I've met a guy at Dreamville

289
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,680
Speaker 3: and we would spend all this time together and sex

290
00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:57,440
Speaker 3: wasn't happening, and I felt like he wasn't into me.

291
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:02,839
Speaker 3: It didn't go that long, but I in this particular case,

292
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:04,120
Speaker 3: there is a.

293
00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:05,400
Speaker 1: Trend with women that do this.

294
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:10,720
Speaker 3: I'm excited to hear the update. I also want to

295
00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:14,800
Speaker 3: make mention too, as far as men go, I've actually

296
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:18,640
Speaker 3: heard this a lot with gay men who are dating

297
00:14:18,679 --> 00:14:22,760
Speaker 3: guys that are straight and just there for like gay

298
00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:27,960
Speaker 3: sexual pleasure. Many times they're in kind of the opposite scenario.

299
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:29,400
Speaker 1: They're with these men.

300
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:32,840
Speaker 3: That only want to fuck them, be around them outside,

301
00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:36,000
Speaker 3: but it's like totally different vibes and it really makes

302
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:39,000
Speaker 3: them feel rejected. So it's interesting because like women are

303
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:41,760
Speaker 3: more apprehensive when it comes to the sexual side, where

304
00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:45,520
Speaker 3: men are more apprehensive for the emotions. So so many

305
00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:49,360
Speaker 3: you know, venting sessions or experiences with myself where you

306
00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:52,280
Speaker 3: kind of see the same thing with men total opposite

307
00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:55,200
Speaker 3: me and the student having great sex, nothing is happening

308
00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:57,640
Speaker 3: when we get outside of the bedroom, whereas with women,

309
00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:02,440
Speaker 3: I actually hear this exact story, like, damn, we're vibing,

310
00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:03,280
Speaker 3: but is she into me?

311
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:06,040
Speaker 1: Is she gay? Does she like women? Is she scared

312
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:06,720
Speaker 1: to start? Like?

313
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:09,760
Speaker 3: You know, and lesbians for a long time too, have

314
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:12,080
Speaker 3: made us all feel like if you're by, we don't

315
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,320
Speaker 3: want you, you know what I'm saying.

316
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:14,240
Speaker 1: So I totally get it.

317
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:18,280
Speaker 3: I mean, when we had Punky on with Alex English

318
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:22,640
Speaker 3: they're both gay, we're talking about their experiences with that. Yeah,

319
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:25,600
Speaker 3: I would lean on yeah, the oh, the friends for

320
00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:27,480
Speaker 3: some advice like this. I'm sure they will talk you

321
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,400
Speaker 3: off the ledge of feeling rejected. I think that's just

322
00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:32,000
Speaker 3: the worst place to feel, especially with someone that's spending

323
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,920
Speaker 3: their time with you. It's definitely not a real rejection

324
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:36,960
Speaker 3: more than it's their own thing. And I think that

325
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:39,160
Speaker 3: in order for you to get out of your own

326
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:41,960
Speaker 3: head and blame yourself about it and feel that level

327
00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:44,760
Speaker 3: of rejection, you literally just need to maybe ask the

328
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:49,880
Speaker 3: questions and open the room to communicate with her about

329
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:52,440
Speaker 3: you having these sexual needs and desires.

330
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,760
Speaker 1: Anyways, make sure you leave your.

331
00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:57,960
Speaker 3: Comments under If you want to see the full video

332
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:01,680
Speaker 3: for this, make sure you join our patren patreon dot

333
00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:05,920
Speaker 3: com backslash Horrible Decisions. We have bonus episodes every week.

334
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:08,200
Speaker 3: Once a month, we have a town hall and then

335
00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:13,640
Speaker 3: You've Got Decisions is ad free full video only on Patreon,

336
00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:16,600
Speaker 3: soe y'all make sure you go subscribe check that out,

337
00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:20,760
Speaker 3: and again we're here every Wednesday, so really excited to

338
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:24,520
Speaker 3: continue giving you guys advice. If you want your letter read,

339
00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:30,160
Speaker 3: make sure you email us Decisions pod at gmail dot com.

340
00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:33,640
Speaker 3: We'll read it and also help us become New York

341
00:16:33,640 --> 00:16:38,560
Speaker 3: Times bestsellers. By ordering now your book No Holds Barred,

342
00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:43,600
Speaker 3: a dual manifesto on sexual exploration and power, available now

343
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,200
Speaker 3: for pre order. We can't do it without you, guys.

344
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,880
Speaker 3: Let's show everyone how strong the whole hive is.

345
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,880
Speaker 1: Thank you guys. See you next week. Bye, y'all,