Speaker 1: Are you leaving?
Speaker 2: I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 1: Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how.
Speaker 2: Much baggage you claim and give us time and a
Speaker 2: terminol and gaggy.
Speaker 1: We want to send you off InStyle.
Speaker 2: We wanna welcome you back home.
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it. We scared her? Was it fine?
Speaker 1: Mal porn? Do you need to ride? Do you need
Speaker 1: to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need
Speaker 1: to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 2: Do your need to ride? To ride.
Speaker 3: With Karen and Chris? Welcome to Do you need to ride?
Speaker 3: This is Chris.
Speaker 1: Fairbanks and this is Karen Tilgaroff.
Speaker 2: Hello, Karen, my friend, Hello Chris.
Speaker 3: Would would you say if I brought you a thoughtful
Speaker 3: gift today?
Speaker 1: Well, I would say for me.
Speaker 2: Yes like that.
Speaker 3: I should have waited. I should have just shown it
Speaker 3: to you.
Speaker 2: And now now I have to, you know, compare your
Speaker 2: actual reaction to them.
Speaker 3: What if it's less than.
Speaker 2: What you just gave?
Speaker 1: What's this guy doing?
Speaker 3: He's going to run into us, So he's very angry.
Speaker 2: I know why. It's because he doesn't like Tesla's, which
Speaker 2: is why I got you this sticker, bought it before
Speaker 2: we knew how awful he.
Speaker 1: Is Oh my god, that rules.
Speaker 2: Now. Yeah, you can stick it back there and feel
Speaker 2: no judgment from anyone, and you'll get a little.
Speaker 3: Honk and wave.
Speaker 1: Well, I don't know if it's enough anymore.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's the least you can do. It's the
Speaker 3: most you can do.
Speaker 1: It's the least I can do. But I think the
Speaker 1: most is turning my car in, which is what I
Speaker 1: planned to do.
Speaker 2: Well in the meantime, we have this sticker, or you
Speaker 2: can save it and give it to a friend, Ladies
Speaker 2: and gentlemen.
Speaker 1: Chris is holding up the sticker like it's the publisher's
Speaker 1: clearing how sweepstakes check, and he like, I think, do
Speaker 1: you want me to take it like this?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I feel like it's huge. The sticker is four
Speaker 2: by five feet. Yeah, it's like.
Speaker 1: It's it's actually a banner.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, won't that looked nice flapping from a flagpole
Speaker 2: on the back of your car?
Speaker 1: I mean, so great, Thank you so much. Where'd you
Speaker 1: find it?
Speaker 2: I was sent an Instagram message that said, look at
Speaker 2: this sticker on the back of this tesla. You should
Speaker 2: get one for Karen. I should remember who sent that message,
Speaker 2: but I do not. Yeah, I was an Internet friend,
Speaker 2: and I thought, you know what, I am going to
Speaker 2: find that, So I searched for it using keywords.
Speaker 1: They didn't even give you a link or anything. They
Speaker 1: just bost you.
Speaker 2: It was just it was just like, look at this
Speaker 2: sticker and I said, I'm going to find it or
Speaker 2: make it.
Speaker 1: They literally dead linked you. It was just a post
Speaker 1: of a picture. Was no further news.
Speaker 2: Right, they just saw the sticker and they're like, hey,
Speaker 2: if it's out there, I know Chris Fairbanks knows how
Speaker 2: to google, and boy do I found it immediately with
Speaker 2: other options.
Speaker 1: What I would love is if that person worked in marketing, right,
Speaker 1: just be the perfect yeah, yeah, go get it.
Speaker 3: The old marketing strategy of hey you do it, well.
Speaker 1: You do it.
Speaker 2: It's my idea, you do it. But it was her
Speaker 2: idea and I very much appreciate it and I found it.
Speaker 2: That's the other ones were worded poorly. Yeah, it just
Speaker 2: has bought it before.
Speaker 3: We knew how awful he is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then people you're not saying anyone's name, No
Speaker 2: one's going to get upset. It's going to weed out
Speaker 2: the people that don't get it.
Speaker 1: Oh, I think people get up I think we're now
Speaker 1: in a very new time in America where everyone's fucking upset.
Speaker 1: Everybody around you is upset, and everybody thinks they ever
Speaker 1: reason to be upset.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I did stand up at the Comedy Store on
Speaker 2: election night and it was completely sold out in the
Speaker 2: main room, and I was nervous that it was a
Speaker 2: bunch of people celebrating, but no, it was a bunch
Speaker 2: of people with a dazed look in their blast over eyes.
Speaker 2: And it was so fun and they needed a release.
Speaker 2: And I've noticed that with all the shows I've done
Speaker 2: this past week. Yes, people are traumatized and they're going
Speaker 2: to comedy to feel better.
Speaker 1: So and it's working.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's It's the only silver lining I can apply
Speaker 2: to my life directly.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, you're a white dude, you're actually doing something. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's always the sick, consistent and like permanent silver lining.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the one that I can feel uncomfortable about.
Speaker 1: But but then remind yourself you have bad bone density, and.
Speaker 2: So you know, yeah, I should have a sticker that
Speaker 2: says my bones are like Swiss cheese, amy alone.
Speaker 3: It's not I'm in pain constantly.
Speaker 1: I'm not the one. I'm not the one you're talking
Speaker 1: about my bones are grinding against each other.
Speaker 2: Yes, you can almost hear them, or you can hear
Speaker 2: me responding with a series of groans.
Speaker 1: I'm going to get what we just said, put on
Speaker 1: a bumper sticker and give it to you. Okay, great,
Speaker 1: and hold it up in front of you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and don't hassle me. Man, My bones are filled
Speaker 2: with air bubbles.
Speaker 1: Porosis is killing me.
Speaker 2: That's what it's called.
Speaker 1: What if the witch pulled up and said, my osteoporosa.
Speaker 2: We gotta figure out that bit for next Halloween.
Speaker 1: I swear to God. The more I did it, the
Speaker 1: it almost felt like my brain was like, here's even
Speaker 1: a less funnier thing. Here's even a less funnier thing.
Speaker 1: And I was just like, but I can't stop doing
Speaker 1: it now. That's comedy. That's the career in comedy, right there.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think what I did say is you were born.
Speaker 3: In February.
Speaker 2: That's why you procrastinate so much, played up the pumpkin something.
Speaker 1: Like that, how Dako?
Speaker 2: It went fine, but I could tell they were wanting
Speaker 2: a better.
Speaker 1: Example, they were wanting my tags.
Speaker 2: The only thing that it helped me get away with
Speaker 2: it I get a great witch voice. It sound a
Speaker 2: little likeness.
Speaker 1: Oh no, yes, yeah, that's I think. Whatever the joke is,
Speaker 1: you're making it hard for people to hear you. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: well it's fund yes, yes, try another one.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm sitting on my diaphragm, which is where I'd
Speaker 2: like to be speaking from.
Speaker 1: How about say the witch? Have the witch read this
Speaker 1: line right here?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 1: Ike?
Speaker 2: Before we knew how awful.
Speaker 3: It's hard for me. I mean that was just.
Speaker 2: More of a you know, a wizard's helper.
Speaker 1: Oh do you want to get a little witch here
Speaker 1: on this one? Take two? We buy they fall?
Speaker 2: We knew how wet? How's that?
Speaker 1: It's horrifying?
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it crossed.
Speaker 2: You really don't have any idea the appearance of that voice,
Speaker 2: the face that goes with it, it's blurred.
Speaker 1: It makes me think of the witch that was on
Speaker 1: I think bugs Bunny or Omerphad or whatever that when
Speaker 1: she would yell, when she would say stuff loud, bobby
Speaker 1: pins would come out of her hair.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, how do you yes remember her?
Speaker 3: Was that from a Looney Tunes?
Speaker 1: I feel like it was adjacent. So it's like, was
Speaker 1: it a witch that Daffy Duck was scared of? Was
Speaker 1: having a problem with her.
Speaker 2: They were the exact shape of bobby pins, but I
Speaker 2: just I didn't know till now that's what they were.
Speaker 2: I just thought they were frustration lines right well.
Speaker 1: And also those type of bobby pins are more for
Speaker 1: holding up like a woman's signon.
Speaker 3: And what is a sheioon?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: That guy's like, hey, it's a courtesy vehicle. I don't
Speaker 2: care if I'm dipping in your land.
Speaker 1: Uhil is like one of those, like it's you're grabbing
Speaker 1: your hair and twisting it up behind you and then
Speaker 1: sticking some bobby pins in it so it looks fancy
Speaker 1: like your own mad men as a lady.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, And that's what I've never known what a
Speaker 2: bobby pin is for, except as a child. Sticking in
Speaker 2: my ear. Oh no, but man, it felt good.
Speaker 1: No it didn't.
Speaker 2: It always felt good.
Speaker 3: I never went too.
Speaker 1: Deep as a child. You were able to control that.
Speaker 2: I put everything in my ears.
Speaker 1: Oh, as long.
Speaker 3: As it was smaller than my elbow. My mother said
Speaker 3: it was okay.
Speaker 2: I think that's actually backwards, and there's no way to
Speaker 2: test that unless you use someone else's elbow.
Speaker 1: Feels like we're setting the bar a little low for
Speaker 1: like a toddler child and sticking stuff in their ears.
Speaker 1: Pretty sensitive, I know.
Speaker 2: Again, that's the bar I started at, and none of
Speaker 2: us realized. What else do we use Q tips.
Speaker 1: For itching or the inside of our ears? Clean?
Speaker 2: Of course? Oh and it says do not put this
Speaker 2: in your baby's ears.
Speaker 3: It doesn't even mention adults.
Speaker 1: It's with babies only. Yes, so sick of that. I'm
Speaker 1: so sick of them getting all the attention.
Speaker 3: I know, what about my adult ears?
Speaker 1: What about?
Speaker 3: I think they're saying, go ahead, it's it's on you.
Speaker 1: No one cares about your dumb ears. It's the baby's ears.
Speaker 1: We have to focus on pencils.
Speaker 3: I'd put in there.
Speaker 2: I would put everything in my ears. And I'm I'm
Speaker 2: going to go out on a limb and say I
Speaker 2: still do okay, But I really.
Speaker 3: Got the distance down.
Speaker 2: I don't think I'm ever going to have a problem
Speaker 2: unless someone you know, intervenes.
Speaker 3: Yes, I don't even want to go into that.
Speaker 1: Don't think about you just made a whole chill go
Speaker 1: down the bottom of my feet.
Speaker 2: Everyone everyone just got goose bumps. Horrifying, or as they
Speaker 2: said in the Peanuts cartoons, to my dismay, Goose pimples.
Speaker 3: That that was not a good day on the Peanut strip.
Speaker 1: Goose pimples on the Peanuts strip.
Speaker 2: Okay, this is a bad day on the Peanuts strip,
Speaker 2: and would before we knew how awful we was. Oh,
Speaker 2: it's just like a timid witch.
Speaker 3: Yes, that keeps stumbling and falling.
Speaker 1: She's more. I feel like she's a little bit more
Speaker 1: of a middle aged, later life witch that one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and she could also do musical theater if you wanted
Speaker 1: her to.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I'm needy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's so many options. But the magic kind of
Speaker 2: your ability to do magic guides your life, whether or
Speaker 2: not you wanted to sing and dance. Sorry, you can
Speaker 2: make rooms a vehicle. Yeah, you have no choice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's just how it is, lady, yep, sorry, sorry,
Speaker 1: stick your shiny on up and put your witch hat
Speaker 1: on and get used to it.
Speaker 3: Yeap.
Speaker 2: You think I would wouldn't rather be doing some other
Speaker 2: than comedy. It's been my calling or I've invested enough
Speaker 2: time into it that I have no choice but to continue.
Speaker 1: You kind of painted yourself into a corner.
Speaker 2: I really did in a lot of ways.
Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, well but it worked out at the
Speaker 1: Comedy Store. I honestly was worried about that show for
Speaker 1: you because of those exact same reasons. Yeah, and it's
Speaker 1: such a nice thing to hear that. People were like,
Speaker 1: please comedy take me away, and that's good. That makes
Speaker 1: me happy.
Speaker 2: And it seemed pandry like I asked for it, but
Speaker 2: it went well, and so at the end, I said.
Speaker 1: Please give me a standing over.
Speaker 2: I'm Chris spare Banks and I don't work here much,
Speaker 2: so tell them you liked me. And then they then
Speaker 2: they stood up no, and I'm like, oh no, no,
Speaker 2: I didn't.
Speaker 3: Okay, that's gonna look like.
Speaker 2: I'm bad. Oh well, those next comic's a good circle surfer.
Speaker 2: But I said circle and then I went off on
Speaker 2: we used to this whole circle jerk thing, I know.
Speaker 2: But they liked that.
Speaker 1: Of course they did.
Speaker 2: I don't know why, but that's how desperate they were
Speaker 2: to laugh. Even a crass brain yess it hot crossbindes.
Speaker 3: They went along with.
Speaker 2: It was so fun.
Speaker 1: Every girl's crazy about them Hot Cross but oh.
Speaker 3: Top, so many rewrites.
Speaker 2: She's got arms, she knows how to lift things.
Speaker 1: And she puts them in and out. What's the hokey
Speaker 1: pokey I can't remember the words.
Speaker 3: She's got head, shoulders, knees and toes.
Speaker 1: Do you know that there's a black woman who is
Speaker 1: a folk artist who wrote the majority of little kids
Speaker 1: songs like that. She just died at one hundred years
Speaker 1: old at least Do you mind looking up her name?
Speaker 1: I keep seeing videos on her.
Speaker 2: Please say. She also wrote a lot of Eazy Top's hand.
Speaker 1: She moonlit as the tambourine player for zz Top while
Speaker 1: during the day she was like, oh, what type of
Speaker 1: weather would you like today? That was Norris rate All
Speaker 1: that free k.
Speaker 3: Song, that's one of them.
Speaker 1: It was about the weather, and my sister and I
Speaker 1: used to make her sing it constantly.
Speaker 2: I've never It's one of those things you don't notice
Speaker 2: much like the harmonica, until you see footage of like
Speaker 2: Skeevie Wonder playing it and you're like, oh, wow, it
Speaker 2: is an instrument that you can master. I went, let
Speaker 2: me go LCD's sound system. Yeah, everyone, go ahead. It's yellow,
Speaker 2: but that doesn't mean.
Speaker 1: Anythinganks everybody, you fucking idiot.
Speaker 2: It will stay mellow. You go ahead.
Speaker 1: Ella Jenkins, first lady of children's music. What's your first name? Ella?
Speaker 1: Ella Jenkins, Ella Jenkins rap to a truly real one
Speaker 1: who gave us all the music of our childhood.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 1: Do you can you name some hits that she that
Speaker 1: she wrote? Only? Sorry, Yeah, it's just so everybody knows.
Speaker 1: It's not just my weird recalling of a TikTok and
Speaker 1: she miss Mary mac oh, did you feed my cow?
Speaker 1: Stop and go? You'll sing a song and all sing along?
Speaker 1: Miss Mary? That's legendary, is it?
Speaker 2: Why?
Speaker 3: Why where have I been?
Speaker 1: It's one of these Miss Mary and mac mac mac oh. Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, with all these buttons that's her.
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, with all these buttons, buttons, buttons.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm taking liberties.
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, it's funny. I need to hear them before,
Speaker 2: because I don't. They don't announce those songs by title
Speaker 2: when you're a child at the club, Yeah, at the
Speaker 2: kids club where I was always off my ass on
Speaker 2: you know, powdered sugar, lines and lines of colored sugar.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, tambourine playing. I watched LCD sound
Speaker 2: System and it.
Speaker 1: Was very good in real life.
Speaker 2: Yes, it was so fun His voice is better than ever.
Speaker 2: And uh, it was such a diverse crowd. There's old
Speaker 2: folks there. Everyone loves that band. It was so fun
Speaker 2: and it was at the Palladium. The Palladium a place
Speaker 2: I've never been, and it was like being at a
Speaker 2: big giant gymnasium. School dance. You have to stand on
Speaker 2: a gym floor. And when you're standing on a gym floor,
Speaker 2: unless you're a nerd, you dance. Yeah, And everyone was
Speaker 2: dancing and I was felt high for days because of it.
Speaker 2: Nice because I took drugs. Oh no, I didn't do
Speaker 2: any drugs.
Speaker 1: The drugs of music I had.
Speaker 2: I had a.
Speaker 3: Lemon spritzer, a mixer for something that was supposed to
Speaker 3: have booze, and I danced, but man, just.
Speaker 2: Booze right exactly. That's what I do, bloody Marry mix
Speaker 2: any of it. I do it, not just on an airplane.
Speaker 2: All ginger ale on ground, now on ground, yes, yeah,
Speaker 2: with all feet on the ground.
Speaker 1: Real quick. Do you want to take a look up
Speaker 1: at that gigantic moon sitting there.
Speaker 2: It's always curious when the moon's out during the day.
Speaker 1: It's a super moon. It's the closest the moon has
Speaker 1: been to Earth in years and years, and it's apparently
Speaker 1: like only two thousand something something miles away. Or one
Speaker 1: hundred thousand miles. I can't remember.
Speaker 3: I mean, if there.
Speaker 2: Were a witch here, we could ask her some of
Speaker 2: that question about the moon.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's a totally different character.
Speaker 2: Hmm, I keep losing it. Well, there's so many witches
Speaker 2: in the Covenant, that's true. The uh there's the clumsy witch,
Speaker 2: there's the smart witch.
Speaker 3: There's one girl witch. And then there's the brain.
Speaker 1: The Harry Poppins witch.
Speaker 3: There's the grumpy witch.
Speaker 2: There's a cat. Yeah, there's the man with the cauldron.
Speaker 2: I'm thinking of the nerves. But yeah, I want to
Speaker 2: I want to get a tambourine.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 2: Guy, was he was good?
Speaker 1: Was he the lead singer playing in tambourine the whole time? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Do you know how hard it is played tambourine?
Speaker 3: Well? Yeah, and he was drumming with the drummer. The
Speaker 3: drummer was amazing.
Speaker 2: But there was there was the last time I saw them,
Speaker 2: which was supposed to be are this is our last
Speaker 2: show was at the Hollywood Bowl, like a decade ago.
Speaker 2: It was more of a DJ a couple other people situation.
Speaker 2: This time it's a whole band and it was amazing.
Speaker 2: And that that song where he's singing about CBGB's and
Speaker 2: all the bands that like uh, daft punk and all
Speaker 2: these bands that they and yeah, they did Medley's from
Speaker 2: all those bands and they did them perfectly mixed in
Speaker 2: the song.
Speaker 3: It was so exciting. Man, it was great.
Speaker 1: Did they do Don't Go yet?
Speaker 3: That's exactly can't help now, don't you know. I'm never
Speaker 3: gonna let you go?
Speaker 1: Don't Go? Legendary Alison Moyer.
Speaker 2: Alisoner I used to sing along thinking that because her
Speaker 2: voice is so amazing, we can't.
Speaker 1: Sing the songs on this. Jim is literally smacking his
Speaker 1: head with this.
Speaker 2: Oh what will they do?
Speaker 3: It'll just be silence.
Speaker 1: No, we have to cut it out because you know,
Speaker 1: you have to pay people if you say just.
Speaker 3: So you know, there's been some silent moments.
Speaker 2: That's because we can't stop singing hits from the past,
Speaker 2: and we are now going to stop.
Speaker 1: We'll stop. Don't stop.
Speaker 2: That makes me think of three more songs they can
Speaker 2: get us sued.
Speaker 1: Oh what I was going to ask, was America's girlfriend
Speaker 1: Nico Case playing in the band?
Speaker 2: Uh No, she Nico Case is part of the New Pornographers.
Speaker 1: God damn it, it's every time.
Speaker 2: It's okay, it's maybe why I like, these are all
Speaker 2: some of my favorite bands. If Nico Case was involved,
Speaker 2: they remain my favorite because she's my favorite.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's incredible for me.
Speaker 2: I got into Nico Case and then the New Pornographers.
Speaker 2: I get into Ac Newman and then the New Pornographers.
Speaker 1: Yep, you found them as individuals.
Speaker 2: Yes, their solo work and that, and it's like, where
Speaker 2: did this all come from? Oh, iconic Canadian indie rock. Yes,
Speaker 2: it's the best if you haven't checked it out.
Speaker 1: New Pornographers, Yeah, and O Case and A. C.
Speaker 2: Newman and Broken Social Scene and Emily Hines and the
Speaker 2: Soft Skeletons.
Speaker 1: And while We're here and.
Speaker 2: Wowweepees the weepies don't don't get me. Well, I can't
Speaker 2: get started because I've never heard of them, but they're
Speaker 2: going to be great.
Speaker 1: They're Canadian.
Speaker 3: I love I love them already.
Speaker 1: I'm almost positive. Yes, Well, listen, the full moon is
Speaker 1: a super moon this week is it? And the people
Speaker 1: on TikToker are advising everyone just keep their mouth shut
Speaker 1: because it's a time of fighting, and I have to
Speaker 1: say I feel it. I feel the time of fighting
Speaker 1: is privately.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's I mean that was going to happen, even
Speaker 2: if the moon did something else this week.
Speaker 3: Oh no, I know. I blame Starlink.
Speaker 1: Fucking Starlink.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't want to sound like a conspiracy theorist.
Speaker 2: But it's interesting, isn't it.
Speaker 1: It's not good.
Speaker 2: It's Starlink is owned by the guy who said collusion
Speaker 2: with the voting is very real.
Speaker 3: Just like a month ago.
Speaker 1: I have to get rid of this car. I just
Speaker 1: can't sit it.
Speaker 2: You don't have to anymore. This sticker makes up for everything.
Speaker 1: I really don't. I don't think it's enough.
Speaker 2: It is, though, because so many people are in the
Speaker 2: same boat. This will help others because they will see
Speaker 2: the sticker on your car, and they too will google.
Speaker 1: But I think it's a better move to just be like,
Speaker 1: I'd rather not be in this car at all.
Speaker 2: But it's it's a nice car, and it's done well
Speaker 2: for you. The cars, I believe have feelings like Horville my.
Speaker 3: White Buick Skyhawk.
Speaker 2: I would say nice things to it. I say nice
Speaker 2: things to my heart, and I think that that's why
Speaker 2: I've never had any trouble. Now, I know I sound
Speaker 2: like a crazy person.
Speaker 1: They get it.
Speaker 3: That feeds a cat human foods like a full hot
Speaker 3: dog with condiments.
Speaker 2: I speak to my cars indigestion. Yeah, we better put
Speaker 2: an old top hat on him and tape a cane
Speaker 2: to his paw. Look at our fancy you dance. Now,
Speaker 2: dance your dumb cat.
Speaker 1: He's farting his way through the dance from young Frankenstein.
Speaker 1: What a wonderful idea.
Speaker 2: Oh I almost did putting on the writs another lawsuit.
Speaker 2: I know we're talking about crackers. Everyone dam sued by.
Speaker 1: The crackers, crackers coming after us.
Speaker 2: I think that this sticker buys you at least enough
Speaker 2: time to find a car that you love, you'll enjoy
Speaker 2: talking to well.
Speaker 1: And I will say this to that point, this car
Speaker 1: separate this car that was not made or developed or
Speaker 1: anything by Elon Musk. The guys that founded this company
Speaker 1: got like corporate rated out of the company. So the
Speaker 1: real guys that made it are it's to their credit right.
Speaker 1: And when I got in that car accident a couple
Speaker 1: of weeks ago, there the guy was going thirty miles
Speaker 1: an hour slammed into the back of me. I fucking
Speaker 1: have no complaints. It got three scratches, and I thought,
Speaker 1: oh shit, my my internal fascia is going to lock
Speaker 1: up and I'm going to be in all kinds of
Speaker 1: back pain and this and that, nothing nothing, So thank you.
Speaker 1: That's sair.
Speaker 2: I was afraid that a few days later you'd feel
Speaker 2: a little little bobby pin in your back.
Speaker 1: Right in my alla, up and down my spine. But
Speaker 1: what I did, and I'll tell everybody this one in doubt,
Speaker 1: take a nice long EPSOM bath, ebso salt bath. That
Speaker 1: was the solution.
Speaker 2: That's what everyone told me when I needed hip replacement surgery.
Speaker 2: Have you tried eb some salts? But I'm in so
Speaker 2: much pain that I'm thinking of bathing with an EPSOM
Speaker 2: printer plugged in there.
Speaker 3: There is a blemish in the center.
Speaker 1: Please write that one down.
Speaker 2: Oh that's thank you. I will, I will, I'll remember
Speaker 2: the comedy. Yes, yes, thank you. I just noticed there
Speaker 2: is a blemish on your bumper right in the center
Speaker 2: from that. You were talking it down, but it's noticeable.
Speaker 2: Look what can cover it? Oh?
Speaker 1: Yeah, A good idea?
Speaker 2: Yeah, so okay, now you're excited. God, I really forced you.
Speaker 1: You had to kind of just build the bridge for
Speaker 1: me to make it work. For the moment, I just
Speaker 1: don't want to be one of those people that's not
Speaker 1: doing enough, and it's like looking like you care, looking
Speaker 1: like you're on a certain side when you're not is
Speaker 1: not helpful, right, So that just is a concern of mine.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1: Well, it's like getting to this time where it's like
Speaker 1: we all were like, you don't go to Starbucks. We're
Speaker 1: not going to Starbucks. Dan, You're like, you do that
Speaker 1: for four months and you're like, can we get a
Speaker 1: storms and right? And then everything's just kind of like
Speaker 1: that where it's normalizing trying to make a move and
Speaker 1: then just everybody being like, Okay, it's taken care of.
Speaker 1: And now this is the day and age where people
Speaker 1: have to fucking like vote with their wallet and not
Speaker 1: support things that are fucked up, and like now it's
Speaker 1: crucial and everyone knows it. I guess it's.
Speaker 2: Funny if I vote with your wallet because I wrote
Speaker 2: down everyone that I wanted to vote for, and I
Speaker 2: did indeed put.
Speaker 3: It in my wallet and pulled it out.
Speaker 2: Did you in the booth? Yeah, I just I.
Speaker 1: Just realized that, So you literally voted with your wallet.
Speaker 2: I really did? You?
Speaker 1: Better keep it up and put that vote for Comptrol
Speaker 1: or back into your wallet, so you know when to
Speaker 1: and when not to.
Speaker 3: Excuse me for a moment.
Speaker 2: Yes, right, joke about EPSOM printer plugged in bath water
Speaker 2: period because of because of hip surgery needed period and.
Speaker 1: Some salt baths recommended. Are you gonna be able to
Speaker 1: reconstruct this thing?
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm very good at these riddles I create for myself.
Speaker 2: And it added what you just said when from salt
Speaker 2: epsom salt recommended it even spelled it correctly.
Speaker 3: See that one's going to be easy.
Speaker 2: See the times that I wake up from a dream
Speaker 2: and I'm like, that's a screenplay, and then it's just jarbled.
Speaker 3: There are times I don't understand.
Speaker 1: You're doing the the jiff pronunciation of jarboled.
Speaker 2: I just a million dollar idea colon, and then it's
Speaker 2: just jw HR four nine seven. I guess it's a
Speaker 2: sci fi movie. I don't know.
Speaker 1: It could be the serial number for that Ebsom printer
Speaker 1: that you're taking into the bath exactly. I peeled yep.
Speaker 2: Now that that is a funny way to go, though
Speaker 2: I wished, well, I don't wish it happened while we
Speaker 2: were podcasting, but I like to relay notable things that
Speaker 2: happened while I was driving. And yesterday I was at
Speaker 2: a light and this truck in front of me that
Speaker 2: had a lot of stuff in the bed of the
Speaker 2: truck had one of those yellow nylon like toe ropes. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but it's a strap, and it was dangling way behind
Speaker 2: the truck, like dragging behind the truck. And we were
Speaker 2: at a red light and he started to go and
Speaker 2: it got all taught and I realized my front wheel
Speaker 2: was on the strap. So as he drove off, it
Speaker 2: was serpentine. It was wrapped around all this garbage in
Speaker 2: the truck. A blanket flew out and at the end
Speaker 2: was a shop back that it was tied to, and
Speaker 2: the shop back shot out of the truck, bounced off
Speaker 2: my bumper and it was filled with feathers. No, I
Speaker 2: don't know why it was so and he just kept going.
Speaker 2: I tried, I honked, I you know, it kind of
Speaker 2: bounced to the side. So I just drove. I didn't
Speaker 2: want it was like traffic time in the center of
Speaker 2: the city. But I do want to know the story
Speaker 2: of a shop back filled with feathers. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: maybe someone tore a duvet may but yeah, if it's
Speaker 2: someone cleaning a chicken coop.
Speaker 1: Could have been somebody that worked at the Perfect Parrot,
Speaker 1: which is over on Riverside.
Speaker 2: They were If they were green feathers, I would have
Speaker 2: immediately thought that, but these were just it looked like
Speaker 2: gray pigeon feathers. Oh, but they were all one color.
Speaker 2: I am starting to think.
Speaker 1: I think you're right about like a duvey or a pillow.
Speaker 2: I would love it if someone was just cleaning out
Speaker 2: a coop because of that. My dad once rented a
Speaker 2: carpet shampoo for Ace Hardware when I was a kid,
Speaker 2: and he I feel so bad thinking about it. They
Speaker 2: my parents just got a new couch and love seat
Speaker 2: and a new navy blue rug to match it, and
Speaker 2: my dad painted a painting to match all this stuff.
Speaker 2: We had finally had an adult, fancy living room set.
Speaker 2: And my dad rented this thing. And not only was
Speaker 2: it not cleaned, it was filled with shit. Oh to
Speaker 2: the and so he's shampooing and it was just leaving
Speaker 2: foamy shit like some a horse trough someone clean or it.
Speaker 2: Even at the time, though I was young at twelve eleven,
Speaker 2: I it seemed human to me. And that's yeah, just
Speaker 2: because I wanted I had my fingers crossed that it
Speaker 2: was a poop.
Speaker 1: That's horrifying.
Speaker 2: It was the worst, and it started my grave fear
Speaker 2: of excrement. I just oh, it was the worst. And
Speaker 2: my dad was so furious and confused, and I remember
Speaker 2: him just in the backyard. It was just like a
Speaker 2: gun shooting into the grass. He was just trying to
Speaker 2: empty it out and he was gagging while swearing.
Speaker 3: Oh, it was so funny.
Speaker 1: Oh, really really unfortunate for your family.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I wonder if he remembers that.
Speaker 1: I bet he does.
Speaker 2: That's something I'll wait for a holiday dinner text it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, wait till right before you take the first buy.
Speaker 2: It absolutely speaking of delicious gravy.
Speaker 1: Father o, father, father, And if the witch was at
Speaker 1: the dinner, I.
Speaker 2: Was the one who willed it to happen.
Speaker 1: It was a d and Gil High intervee.
Speaker 2: Why do we invite Hagatha every year? So good?
Speaker 1: It seems like comedy is going to become incredibly crucial comedy. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: is coming two three years.
Speaker 2: Yes, I mean it's the only hopeful thing I have
Speaker 2: to say. Yeah, is I can finally all this all
Speaker 2: this this material that I've had written already about Matt Getz.
Speaker 3: Finally we'll have a phone home foam.
Speaker 1: Finally we'll have a ship filled foam watching red cleaner.
Speaker 3: That Ace Hardware rented carpet machine is so symbolic of
Speaker 3: what's happening.
Speaker 2: It is filled with the future.
Speaker 1: It's very true. Also, we had an Ace Hardware in
Speaker 1: my town, Rex Hardware.
Speaker 2: It was called but it had the ACE logo.
Speaker 1: That's right.
Speaker 2: Yes, they were independently franchised days.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so ours was Rex Hardware, and that was the
Speaker 1: softball team I played on the first time I played
Speaker 1: softball in Minis when I was like seven years old.
Speaker 1: And so I had this T shirt. It's super perfectly
Speaker 1: late seventies, early eighties. That's just a red T shirt
Speaker 1: with this block white capitol writing that says REX Hardware
Speaker 1: on the front of it, with no other explanation, nothing else. No, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just the most perfect like this. That's what marketing
Speaker 1: used to be, and that's how far commercialism used to go.
Speaker 1: It's just like, oh, I guess we'll put our name
Speaker 1: on it. Yeah, no picture, nothing fancy, yep.
Speaker 2: One of my baseball teams there was a restaurant confusingly
Speaker 2: named The Chicken Too, like It was a sequel to
Speaker 2: the original The Chicken The Chicken Too, And that.
Speaker 3: Was on all these shirts a losing baseball team.
Speaker 1: But just through writing, yeah what font do you remember?
Speaker 2: It was a classy cursive.
Speaker 1: Okay, the chicken too?
Speaker 3: The chicken too?
Speaker 1: Was there a calm after the word chicken?
Speaker 2: I was then on Hogiville and Jim Palmer Trucking?
Speaker 1: Did Jim Palmer Trucking win?
Speaker 2: I was never on a winning baseball team, and I
Speaker 2: think that I had a lot to do with that,
Speaker 2: since I was the pitcher.
Speaker 1: I was just forced of hitch even though you weren't
Speaker 1: very good at it.
Speaker 2: Well, I was okay at it, I think I recall,
Speaker 2: and I'm not trying to sell out any of these
Speaker 2: other kids on the team, but there was a lot
Speaker 2: of candy eating while looking up at the clouds.
Speaker 1: How old?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, exactly, we're fifth grade?
Speaker 1: Oh something, that's too old to be right?
Speaker 2: Right? And then and then so it went miners, majors,
Speaker 2: and seniors. So in the minor leagues, I was a pitcher.
Speaker 2: Then they were like, wait a minute, you look like
Speaker 2: a little kid, but you're thirteen.
Speaker 3: You should be in the seniors.
Speaker 2: I skipped the majors, and then I was in the seniors,
Speaker 2: still the same size. I was all of a sudden,
Speaker 2: there's guys like Jason Shanahan who became a pro baseball.
Speaker 3: Player, growing eighty mile an hour pitches.
Speaker 2: That none no kid could hit like grown men with
Speaker 2: Harry Leggs, that had girlfriends that had made babies, that
Speaker 2: grown men. And I was still a tiny kid with
Speaker 2: beech fuzz. And I was horrified, and that's why I quit.
Speaker 2: I'm like, well, I'm not growing at the same rate. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that went into high school. I was playing with high
Speaker 2: school kids.
Speaker 1: Kyle Shanahan.
Speaker 3: You say his name was Jason Shanahan.
Speaker 2: Jason, Yeah, Yeah, he went on to play.
Speaker 1: I feel like I need to see a picture if
Speaker 1: he actually made it to become a professional baseball player.
Speaker 1: I deserve to see he was.
Speaker 2: Every kid was trembling because he threw so hard and
Speaker 2: he was still young, so there was a good chance
Speaker 2: the ball could hit you in the head and make
Speaker 2: you die.
Speaker 3: That's right, And so I was so scared.
Speaker 2: Missoula Mavericks Baseball, Yes, he certainly. Yeah, he played for
Speaker 2: the MAP. I think he like is back in town coaching.
Speaker 1: But he made it to the making.
Speaker 2: I'm surprised. I yeah, that's him. Look at that big
Speaker 2: square job. But everything we all want.
Speaker 1: Always are professional baseball.
Speaker 2: Wow, that's yeah. Yeah he played Saint Louis Cardinals Florida Marlins. Shit, yeah,
Speaker 2: I didn't even know that. Okay, now I feel better
Speaker 2: about I mean Saint Louis Cardinals in ninety one. This
Speaker 2: was like three years before that. He was already throwing
Speaker 2: professionally fast. He was throwing harder than ady. I it's
Speaker 2: just like, okay, it's it's almost like he can't be
Speaker 2: in the little leagues.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he shouldn't be.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they didn't have the minor league team and Nola
Speaker 2: the offspray, very popular.
Speaker 1: Bird, incredibly catchy bird. Ye see the picture. No, Chris
Speaker 1: wouldn't show it to me. Yes, classic, so.
Speaker 2: Classic, good looks. That's why I didn't show you. I
Speaker 2: knew you'd fall in love with my baseball nemesis.
Speaker 1: With my best friend Jason.
Speaker 2: He doesn't remember me.
Speaker 1: What was Jason like? Did he know he was going
Speaker 1: to the bigs? Was his family like all intensive?
Speaker 2: Yeah, he had one of the loudest dads. That was
Speaker 2: That was the hardest part is you're all these dads
Speaker 2: are yelling at you like you're their son. My dad
Speaker 2: wasn't yelling at me. He just was never did no.
Speaker 2: And then one day I was like, Dad, I think
Speaker 2: I'm skateboard. He's like, okay, yep, and the rest is history.
Speaker 1: And then you get there and Tony Hawk's and getting
Speaker 1: intense and flipping in your face and stuff.
Speaker 2: Tony Hawk is not my dad. I've said it so
Speaker 2: many times.
Speaker 1: God damn it, Tony Hawk, stop bullying me, and do
Speaker 1: your make your McNasty flip side? What is it like
Speaker 1: a McDonald's one.
Speaker 2: The mctwist, that's that was first done by Mike McGill,
Speaker 2: but I think probably perfected later by other guys, But
Speaker 2: Mike McGill still no one can dispute the mctwist is his.
Speaker 1: That's his. Yes, he did it in front of the
Speaker 1: bank first.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Uh yeah.
Speaker 2: Ramp something I can't you know, a vert ramp? Who
Speaker 2: add access to that? Vert ramp parts were just the
Speaker 2: reason to push the fast forward button because we didn't.
Speaker 3: We couldn't relate these kids, you.
Speaker 1: Know me, Yeah you can't. You're like, I don't speak
Speaker 1: this language.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm a streets kid. Yeah, I'm a street kid.
Speaker 1: This is an indoors ramp builled kid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what does that mean?
Speaker 1: They're just rich?
Speaker 3: Just they're from California.
Speaker 1: And they just immediately the second they're good at skateboarding,
Speaker 1: they get funneled into some sort of a system.
Speaker 3: Right, I think so.
Speaker 2: I think they had vert ramps in like California and
Speaker 2: Texas and that's where all these guys came from in
Speaker 2: the eighties. But Montana, we had one curb.
Speaker 1: You can get on that curb and you can get
Speaker 1: your ass back off that curb.
Speaker 2: Tony Hawk has a son, Riley, who is married and
Speaker 2: just had a child with Kurt Cobain's Francis Francis Bean.
Speaker 2: And so now there's a kid out there whose grandparents
Speaker 2: are Tony Hawk and Kurt Cobain. Wow, that kid can't.
Speaker 3: I'll never know, can't do anything like imagine being in
Speaker 3: that position and you're just trying to order a scone
Speaker 3: or you know.
Speaker 1: Your day to day is just like always yeah, always going,
Speaker 1: Am I cool enough? Now?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Exactly. You can't go to Warby Parker and get
Speaker 2: reader glasses.
Speaker 3: Everything is judged. You have to be cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So much pressure, so much pressure, and so much like
Speaker 1: your parents have you an ac DC onesies from when
Speaker 1: you are three months old. Yeah, that moon is going
Speaker 1: to something's going to happen. I'm just telling you, you are.
Speaker 2: You are more obsessed with the moon than Jimmy Stewart's
Speaker 2: wife on It's a wonderful life.
Speaker 1: It's just really big and in front of us. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, this affects people.
Speaker 2: I will draw a picture of you lassoing the moon, Karen.
Speaker 2: I know I can read through the lines clearly doing them.
Speaker 1: I'm asking for you to paint that picture onto the
Speaker 1: front of a grocery store. This holiday season.
Speaker 2: I did a cameo and I pitched I don't know
Speaker 2: why I did this, the idea of, uh, these cats.
Speaker 2: The cameo was for these cats, and I was riffing
Speaker 2: about the cats wearing different outfits and I'm like, that
Speaker 2: would be a funny drawing. And now I'm just waiting.
Speaker 2: I'm going I'm going to be asked to draw these cats.
Speaker 1: Right, because you essentially offered.
Speaker 2: I exactly yeah, And I even said, I you know,
Speaker 2: I can't do it, and I held up my hand
Speaker 2: and feigned a jiggly, uncontrollable hand. But I know the
Speaker 2: order will be coming in and then I got to sit.
Speaker 1: And draw, and then you have to fake that your
Speaker 1: trembling hand has become still for the job.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, good thing I had these leftover still pills.
Speaker 2: But yes, I'm trying to say yes tomorrow art. I
Speaker 2: realize that's my retirement plan is to you know, just
Speaker 2: sell paintings them. Yeah, it's it's It's better than you know,
Speaker 2: handing out samples at Costco, is it. Well? I noticed
Speaker 2: a lot of I know a lot of the people
Speaker 2: in my hometown as like, that's my eighth grade teacher
Speaker 2: and he's just handing out Tatino's pizza roles. Oh and
Speaker 2: remember when you yelled at me and said crimea River Fairbanks.
Speaker 2: Look at you now handing out tostitos Tatino's.
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm an example of the criminally underpaid teaching
Speaker 1: sector of America. Yeah, well, well you're happy.
Speaker 3: He was very mean to me.
Speaker 2: But then he saw me and he totally recognized me
Speaker 2: and said my name.
Speaker 1: I wish I said, wow, children, got told that people
Speaker 1: are going to be mean to you, because I feel
Speaker 1: like those first couple of times that like a teachers
Speaker 1: mean to you, it's so shocking, Like I remember Missus
Speaker 1: Patterson yelling at me one time when all I did
Speaker 1: was take over this girl's science fair project and start
Speaker 1: running at myself and she wasn't there because I wanted
Speaker 1: to see it. It was really fun. It was just
Speaker 1: a mouse trap game set up, and she came in
Speaker 1: and started screaming at me, and it was so fucking
Speaker 1: crazy and it was so shocking, and I literally felt
Speaker 1: like like the bane, Like I felt like the worst
Speaker 1: person in town, and like you should absolutely tell kids
Speaker 1: before that actually happens to them, like, oh, if that
Speaker 1: ever happens to you, you have to know that that
Speaker 1: person's probably crazy or just an asshole, and you don't
Speaker 1: have to worry about it.
Speaker 2: You're right, No one preps you for that. No, even
Speaker 2: in the class called prep for life.
Speaker 1: Even in that class.
Speaker 2: We're just baking. I thought you were going to teach
Speaker 2: me how to pay taxes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and handle it when people have like aggression disorders.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I made the wrong note on my trombone and rest
Speaker 2: Or Smart threw a pencil at it whizzed by my face,
Speaker 2: and I remember saying, what if that pencil went in
Speaker 2: my eye?
Speaker 3: Then what? And he got very upset and left the room.
Speaker 2: Said that I got him.
Speaker 1: You fucking said that to the teacher.
Speaker 3: Yeahss genius.
Speaker 2: And miss Randolf once she took my pencil once and
Speaker 2: broke it. She would grab me, pinch my ear, h
Speaker 2: like that's some you know, little house on the prairie. Shit,
Speaker 2: yes it is, grabbed my ear and lifted me up.
Speaker 2: Cut to selling coupon books door to door when I
Speaker 2: was fourteen or fifteen, My first scary job where they'd
Speaker 2: dropped me off in a terrible neighborhood that they deemed
Speaker 2: needing coupons, right, so there's always dogs. And I knocked
Speaker 2: on the door and I recognized her right away, and
Speaker 2: she was just like she was back when I was
Speaker 2: a kid, and told me to get off her property.
Speaker 2: And I said, you were my teacher in third grade
Speaker 2: and you were really.
Speaker 3: Mean to me.
Speaker 2: And then I walked away and she just was silent,
Speaker 2: and again I got her, Yeah you did.
Speaker 3: It's all about revenge.
Speaker 1: It's specifically teach sure revenge. So I think it's just
Speaker 1: bold of you in this day and age, Chris. It's
Speaker 1: a bold move.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, it's it's always Yeah, those those situations where
Speaker 2: you wish you had said something and that comes to
Speaker 2: you later. There's just a handful of times in the
Speaker 2: moment I thought of it, and so I remember those.
Speaker 3: But there are dozens of other times.
Speaker 2: Where instead of saying anything, I was overly nice for
Speaker 2: some reason. Yep, and you know, just just weird.
Speaker 1: I remember I got a good one of those. There
Speaker 1: was a person who I worked with who was just
Speaker 1: look at that moon. I am telling.
Speaker 2: You, it is impressive.
Speaker 1: It's just gigantic and pretty.
Speaker 3: What do you know?
Speaker 2: And I'm assuming it's gas and we will go back
Speaker 2: to your story. Okay, so doggy or that is what
Speaker 2: was I saying? Oh no, anyway, how sometimes the moon
Speaker 2: it's huge, like at night. Sometimes you're like, it's ten
Speaker 2: times the size it normally is.
Speaker 3: Why is it magnified like that?
Speaker 1: Well, because it depends on time of day. But when
Speaker 1: it's closer to the horizon, it looks bigger. So when
Speaker 1: the moon is rising, it always looks bigger closer to
Speaker 1: the ground, for because you're like because of the ratio.
Speaker 1: But then also, as I said twice before, this is
Speaker 1: a supermoon, so supermoons are closer I think. And then
Speaker 1: as I also said before, this one is especially close
Speaker 1: the closest moon has been to Earth in a long time.
Speaker 2: That's because there are other times where it isn't a
Speaker 2: supermoon or anything, and.
Speaker 3: It's literally three times that size.
Speaker 2: And I've seen it and I'm like, any why isn't
Speaker 2: that on the news that the moon like And I've
Speaker 2: heard that there are certain atmospheric gas situations that actually
Speaker 2: act like a lens and magnified.
Speaker 3: The moon, but that organically there's no gas.
Speaker 1: That is just well, it's up too high.
Speaker 3: That's a bigger moon.
Speaker 1: And also it was already up there, which I love.
Speaker 2: Do you feel like it's up too high today?
Speaker 1: Yes, it's I'm very scared.
Speaker 3: Everything's out of sorts.
Speaker 2: Do we get knocked off our axes by US space
Speaker 2: by satellite starlink? I? I just the moon is up
Speaker 2: too high? Why is it so bright?
Speaker 1: And it's kind of hanging over us in our face.
Speaker 3: It's important to note that the sun is also out everybody.
Speaker 1: And the yeah, it also rises.
Speaker 2: Just as a general this is where it's all a lie.
Speaker 3: We're in a giant Truman Show snow globe.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's possible.
Speaker 2: That moon is just painted on the inside of a
Speaker 2: domed glass.
Speaker 1: Just like like Las.
Speaker 2: Vegas, round Earth, give me a break.
Speaker 1: Did you ever see that? Was it a movie where
Speaker 1: they're a second moon comes up and then everyone starts
Speaker 1: freaking out. People think it's the end of the world.
Speaker 2: Oh, I think you're thinking of Demi Moore's seventh sign.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I saw that. This one is with that
Speaker 1: girl with the long blonde hair from thea Ao aoa
Speaker 1: the Oway.
Speaker 2: From the oc I actually, yeah, I'm not sure it
Speaker 2: would be scary. I mean, talk about the scariest thing
Speaker 2: ever is suddenly there being more than one moon. What
Speaker 2: would I would I don't know what I would do, right.
Speaker 1: It's suddenly we're just like, what's now? What are the
Speaker 1: new rules?
Speaker 2: I just that's the kind of night there'd be two moons,
Speaker 2: and it's like, wait, I have a show tonight. I
Speaker 2: don't have time to address this, but everyone's going to
Speaker 2: be thinking about it.
Speaker 1: Everyone's gonna have a bit. You better write one. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: what would say about two moons?
Speaker 3: Good one for me and my twin sister.
Speaker 2: The witches often have as sister uh huh. At times
Speaker 2: they're conjoined at the same cauldron. H yeah, I want
Speaker 2: to lead a bunch of cherries. The other one spits
Speaker 2: up all the pits. I'm, of course speaking of Susan Sarandon,
Speaker 2: Sarah Jessica Parker hmm, and.
Speaker 1: Michelle Pfeifer.
Speaker 2: Michelle Pfeifer. The p contrary to popular belief, is not silent.
Speaker 2: Michelle Pfeifer, get it in there. Yeah, I'm not remembering.
Speaker 3: What you know, the Witch movie. I'm talking about the Eastwick?
Speaker 2: Is it of east Wick?
Speaker 1: Yes, it is.
Speaker 2: It's I For some reason, that was the movie, not
Speaker 2: The Shining or any other movie that made me very
Speaker 2: scared of Jack Nicholson. Really, yeah, he really scared me.
Speaker 1: Well he was especially like creepy in that movie. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and like danger. He was the devil.
Speaker 2: I think anytime you sexualize Jack Nicholson, you're gonna scare
Speaker 2: me below the way.
Speaker 1: Just keep it to the Lakers. Yeah that's about it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and turn into a wolf.
Speaker 3: I'll watch that. Sure, I'm one of the only people
Speaker 3: who watched it.
Speaker 2: But who Michelleeruffifer's in per fucking everything? Uh, you know
Speaker 2: my Favoriteffifer vehicle Married to the Mob. And I'm not
Speaker 2: sure why. I think just because New Order was on
Speaker 2: the soundtrack.
Speaker 1: Oh really, Yeah, I like my favorite Puffifer. I think
Speaker 1: is The Fabulous Baker Boys a lovely movie from the nineties.
Speaker 3: I don't think I've seen The Fabulous Baker Boys.
Speaker 1: It's Micheller is there, Bridges, both Bridges brothers bo oh
Speaker 1: shit and Jeffrey goddamn it.
Speaker 3: Oh it's okay. We didn't know that kid was going to.
Speaker 2: These kids. I worry about kids at a at a crosswalk.
Speaker 2: I feel like they don't know the etiquette and they're going
Speaker 2: to jump out.
Speaker 1: Well, y, I just.
Speaker 3: I understand.
Speaker 1: Everything's so impossible. I'm going, okay, that was a I
Speaker 1: just don't want to see eleven year olds waiting to
Speaker 1: cross ever near me. You just don't want it near me.
Speaker 2: That's something I didn't see back in my day of
Speaker 2: being eleven, uh, when professionals were throwing balls at me.
Speaker 2: Kids jogging. He was a child out jogging right, and just.
Speaker 1: Ma'am, Yes, it looked like a child jogging. And also
Speaker 1: it was a child taking it's jogging very seriously because
Speaker 1: it was checking his watch right as it stood there,
Speaker 1: and kind of like it had like loose hands, like
Speaker 1: it was in some sort of a jogging clinic. And
Speaker 1: that's so la where somebody is making their child give
Speaker 1: a shit that much of a shit about like cross
Speaker 1: country jogging or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, when I moved here, I was I was jogging
Speaker 2: through Hollywood all the time because I thought I needed
Speaker 2: to get ripped.
Speaker 1: Were you really?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 2: And one night, I it was like night and I
Speaker 2: was running down Santa Monica Boulevard to the twenty four
Speaker 2: hour Fitness Wow and Jillian Barbary from Good Day La
Speaker 2: Sure was in the same position we were just at.
Speaker 2: I was at the corner. She was trying to take
Speaker 2: a rite. I guess I was a little too close
Speaker 2: to the curb or no, it said walk and I
Speaker 2: didn't walk right away. Uh huh, And she said go
Speaker 2: you stupid motherfucker. And I was like, wait a minute.
Speaker 2: And then the guy next to me was like, I
Speaker 2: think that was Jillian Barbery And then I finished the
Speaker 2: sentence from.
Speaker 3: Good Day Live and he's like, yeah it was, And we.
Speaker 2: Just laughed so hard.
Speaker 1: That is fucking hilarious.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was amazing how upset she was.
Speaker 1: She was having a hard day.
Speaker 3: Well yeah, and yeah, she had a Portia nine to eleven.
Speaker 1: She when also she had to get up so early
Speaker 1: to do that fucking morning show.
Speaker 3: I have no idea the stress of her schedule.
Speaker 2: I am a motherfucker. If you only get four hours sleep,
Speaker 2: I'll take it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, for real. It's like that was her problem for sure.
Speaker 2: But still, yeah, she could just see on my face
Speaker 2: that I get eight hours of sleep every night.
Speaker 3: Surious.
Speaker 1: She's so jealous and she also knew. She's like, I
Speaker 1: bet you that guy does an incredible which voice, like heartbroken, I.
Speaker 2: Do one incredible one and a dozen bad ones. I'm
Speaker 2: keeping the incredible one for the end. Oh, I can't
Speaker 2: do it whilst sitting.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah, so I think this will be the
Speaker 1: end of this episode, right.
Speaker 2: I think it probably will stay tuned for next week
Speaker 2: when I do that perfect witch voice you've been listening
Speaker 2: to Do you Need a Ride? D y n E.
Speaker 1: To to.
Speaker 2: This has been an exactly right production.
Speaker 1: Our senior producer is Analise Nelson.
Speaker 3: Mixed by Edson Choy.
Speaker 1: Our talent booker is Patrick Cottner.
Speaker 3: Theme song by Karen.
Speaker 1: Kilgareff, artwork by Chris Fairbanks. Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter,
Speaker 1: and Facebook at dinar podcast That's d Ynar Podcast.
Speaker 2: For more information, go to exactly Rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Oh you're welcome,