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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of the

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Speaker 1: Royal Trend and Bombs courtesy of lumber Jack.

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Speaker 2: With a q ah like lumber Jacques Lumber Jacques Q

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Speaker 2: just JQ lumber JQ not Yeah, I know Jacques, I

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Speaker 2: know the word Jock.

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Speaker 3: I know it, Jack, I mean that's my that's a homegirl, Jacqueline.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that's why. That's that's the other JQ Tom

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Speaker 4: I know Jacqueline.

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Speaker 5: Okay, okay, uh so shout out to you, Shout out

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Speaker 5: to super producer Brian who when we asked, do you

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Speaker 5: remember we done this short show title muttered none of

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Speaker 5: this matters under his breath.

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Speaker 2: True true, and that's our daily dose of realism and nihilism.

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Speaker 4: We love it. I am Jack. That is Miles and

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Speaker 4: I will have to marry pancake.

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Speaker 2: And uh nothing matters. We believe in nassing people, even

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Speaker 2: not sing to Miles. USA Today QRS magazine. In fact,

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Speaker 2: this is I'm not going to give USA Today credit

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Speaker 2: for this. They're just reprinting the great reporting done in

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Speaker 2: QRS magazine. You know what's so funny, Jack, You were asking,

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Speaker 2: what's QRS magazine the fucking paper of record. USA Today

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Speaker 2: had to fucking typo. It's QSR magazine for quick service restaurant.

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Speaker 2: They said they had the typo throughout and I was like,

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Speaker 2: that's so weird that it's QRS magazine because QSR is

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Speaker 2: a known thing.

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Speaker 4: That's quick service restaurant, right.

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Speaker 1: An industry term, and USA today unaware saving money on

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Speaker 1: the copy editing.

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Speaker 4: It all happens. It happens to the worst of us,

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Speaker 4: that's right.

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Speaker 1: Anyways, they have a report on what is the fastest

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Speaker 1: fast food chains drive through?

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Speaker 2: Wait, like, who's getting you in and out? Who's getting

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Speaker 2: you in and out the drive through? Uh?

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Speaker 4: Huh uh?

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Speaker 1: And and you'll never guess who's number one? Baby with

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Speaker 1: a bullet one of our faves.

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Speaker 4: Oh no really yeah.

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Speaker 2: To co Bell, to Cobell, Oh who'd have thought? I mean, man,

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Speaker 2: the people at my local. This shit is coming out. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: even when I do, even when I do the custom shit,

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Speaker 2: yeah is there?

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Speaker 3: Like how far behind are the others?

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Speaker 4: There?

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Speaker 1: So two hundred and seventy eight point eight four seconds,

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Speaker 1: Like the specificity is great that that's what they averaged.

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Speaker 1: They went through loads of drive throughs. One hundred and

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Speaker 1: twenty five orders completed during breakfast hours, five hundred and

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Speaker 1: twenty nine during lunch, one hundred and seventy four during

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Speaker 1: the afternoon, six hundred during dinner. And yeah, so so

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Speaker 1: they went, they went in. It was from June of

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Speaker 1: last year to July or June to July of this year.

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Speaker 1: And yeah, so undred seventy eight point eight four seconds

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Speaker 1: too in second place, Carls Junior three hundred and three

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Speaker 1: point seventy four seconds, KFC also at three hundred and

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Speaker 1: three seconds, just right there and then coming in last

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Speaker 1: one does not surprise me, But the second to last

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Speaker 1: does surprise me. So all the way back at four

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Speaker 1: hundred and thirty six seconds, Chick fil A, Yeah, Chick.

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Speaker 3: Fil always at the bottom.

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Speaker 1: Of course, they're always at the bottom. I feel like

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Speaker 1: they're doing it willfully, like they like having a little

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Speaker 1: line there to show you that even though they.

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Speaker 2: Have like so many people out like preempting you with

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Speaker 2: the fucking order iPad and the shit.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they they they take their sweet ass time.

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Speaker 4: McDonald's. The second to last four hundred and thirteen seconds.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that surprises me better.

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Speaker 4: I feel like I've had.

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Speaker 1: Quick maybe maybe I order like kind of very standard

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Speaker 1: menu items for McDonald.

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Speaker 2: No, you don't jack you ask for so many filet

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Speaker 2: of fish sandwiches, or like the breakfast burrito I've ordered

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Speaker 2: with you, You're always you're always organ and stuff they

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Speaker 2: don't have ready, have you have you had those since

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Speaker 2: you were a kid? No, have you ever liked the

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Speaker 2: little breakfast pekitos? I think whatever I had there? Yeah, yeah, whatever,

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Speaker 2: it's like in a flower tortilla, not ever never. Why

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Speaker 2: would you get that at mcdonald' unless they were out

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Speaker 2: of every other breakfast sandwich. I think I did it

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Speaker 2: to hurt myself and remind me that there are better

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Speaker 2: things out there than that. But yeah, Taco Bell just

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Speaker 2: fucking killing it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, like way out front.

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Speaker 3: Well, good to know we're on the right side of

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Speaker 3: that one.

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Speaker 1: Jack twenty five seconds out in front of the second place,

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Speaker 1: and like a significant like you know, almost two hundred

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Speaker 1: seconds in front of Chick fil a. Like that's a

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Speaker 1: you know, you wing up get Taco Bell every day.

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Speaker 4: Like we are. That's that's oh hell yeah a lifetime man.

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Speaker 3: That adds up.

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Speaker 2: And imagine if I was doing that in one of

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Speaker 2: these other places, I might not ever be able to

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Speaker 2: see my son grow up.

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Speaker 4: That's right.

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Speaker 2: It's also it probably like says something bad about like

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Speaker 2: being able to get food out that quickly that I'm

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Speaker 2: just not not to think about.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm not I'm not gonna think about that at all.

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Speaker 1: All right, pepper X marks the spot as South Carolina

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Speaker 1: pepper expert scorches his own Guinness Book Heat record.

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Speaker 3: Oh wow, the guy who made the Carolina Reaper.

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Speaker 4: He's gone.

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Speaker 3: This guy gone heavy scientist.

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Speaker 4: Isn't he just trying to kill people at this point?

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Speaker 2: Like how it's also wild that Elon Musk paid him

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Speaker 2: to make this?

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Speaker 4: Is that really no.

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Speaker 3: Is the hottest fucking pepper out there?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but this is you know, just always pushing the

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Speaker 1: furthest edges of technology. I watched an entire episode of

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Speaker 1: a documentary I think we did?

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Speaker 4: Did we do? Like a streaming on a string?

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Speaker 2: It was about like the Netflix, right, that was about

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Speaker 2: like like sort of really peculiar things to Yeah, yeah, remember.

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Speaker 1: The peculiar contests, and one of them was like people

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Speaker 1: eating the hottest pepper.

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Speaker 4: In the world. Uh huh.

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Speaker 1: And I just like I have bad memories from watching that.

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Speaker 1: Just my internal like, you know, whatever those mirror neurons

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Speaker 1: are in me are are too strong, and I just

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Speaker 1: like felt like bad. I felt like physically pained watching

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Speaker 1: these people like harm themselves for no real reward, right right, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just bummed me out.

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Speaker 2: Look, I was I was doing stuff on the internet

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Speaker 2: around the time when eating dumb peppers was like a

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Speaker 2: thing you did for clicks.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and yeah, I.

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Speaker 2: Mean shit, I've I've had like the fourth hottest one,

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Speaker 2: and that was like enough to just like fucking bend meat,

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Speaker 2: like just fucking make my stomach caven. Although I did

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Speaker 2: read up before I eat a lot of bananas because

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Speaker 2: I was reading from like competitive eaters whenever they do

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Speaker 2: like eating super spicy stuff to protect their stomachs. First,

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Speaker 2: they eat a lot of bananas because the potassium helps

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Speaker 2: like make things less fucked up for your tum tum and.

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Speaker 4: Because it's like a slimy food that coach your belly.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And just to look at the skullfl units on

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Speaker 2: this shit, right, like fucking a habanero is around one

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Speaker 2: hundred thousand scovil units. The one that he did last time,

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Speaker 2: the Carolina Reaper one point six four million units.

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Speaker 4: Right, just so you know that was plenty.

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Speaker 2: By the way, police pepper spray has one point six

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Speaker 2: million scovil units. Fucking bear Spray has two point.

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Speaker 3: Two million units.

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Speaker 2: The fucking pepper X two point six nine million units,

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Speaker 2: So it's this shit's spicier than bear spray.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was so one person who is the one

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Speaker 1: of five people who have successfully eaten one of these

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Speaker 1: and I use successfully very loosely. Ed Curry, who is

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Speaker 1: the hot pepper expert who bred the Carolina Reaper and

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Speaker 1: who made Pepperax, is one of five people who did it.

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Speaker 1: And this is his description of the experience. I was

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Speaker 1: feeling the heat for three and a half hours. Then

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Speaker 1: the cramps came. Those cramps are horrible. I was laid

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Speaker 1: out flat on a marble wall for approximately an hour

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Speaker 1: in the rain, groaning in pain. Apparently he laid out

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Speaker 1: flat on a marble wall. So, like Spider it gives

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Speaker 1: you Spider Man powers, which is greazy, But I love

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Speaker 1: that this is this is his work, and this is

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Speaker 1: like a brag, This is him flexing on people.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like, oh yeah, ruined my life. That's how good

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Speaker 2: it is. That's how impressive my work is. It ruined everything.

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Speaker 2: And he's a real he's a real marketing genius. His

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Speaker 2: company is called Pucker, but.

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Speaker 4: Truly genius a visionary a visionary.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, the horrifying details from the ground in Gaza continue

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Speaker 1: to come in. Yeah, the body count that is being

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Speaker 1: reported of Palestinian children is you know, far out numbering

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Speaker 1: estimates from the Hamas attack. But the outrage seems to

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Speaker 1: be you know, it's just what we've talked about before.

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Speaker 1: It just seems to be like discounting going on of

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Speaker 1: human lives.

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Speaker 2: Well, and it's also fucked up that we're reduced to

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Speaker 2: what the what the body count is to be like okay,

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Speaker 2: are we done now, like can that be it?

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Speaker 3: But we aren't.

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Speaker 2: And then we're also just seeing like again, like the

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Speaker 2: disparity in how it's being reported just continues to be

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Speaker 2: fucking awful. Like you have you know, some outlets being like, uh,

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Speaker 2: you know there is real is real strikes a hospital

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Speaker 2: like with many dead, and then you have other ones

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Speaker 2: that are just kind of obscuring anything using passive voice

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Speaker 2: and just wanting you to make it feel like, oh

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Speaker 2: yeah that place kind of like blew up, I guess right,

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Speaker 2: or like like local news is like what like the

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Speaker 2: headline wuld be like Israel denies bombing a hospital. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: Al Jazeera has you know, says an Israeli airstrike has

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Speaker 2: hit a hospital in Gaza City. But KTLA and like

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Speaker 2: other like US outlets, mainstream outlets are like, uh, Israel

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Speaker 2: denies this. Israel is gonna take take a beat on this.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But and I mean like now like CNN now actually

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Speaker 2: has something more than five hundred. I mean, god, I

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Speaker 2: can't even like read these that again, we're Joe Biden

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Speaker 2: needs to This is very important for Joe Biden. He's

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Speaker 2: going to be in Israel tomorrow and many people are

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Speaker 2: wondering what he is going to do and say, I'd

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Speaker 2: imagine the optics are going to be like we stand

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Speaker 2: by this country. But that sort of like we'll always

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Speaker 2: stand by Israel kind of rhetoric has given the government

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Speaker 2: there licensed to do fucking anything, it feels like. So

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Speaker 2: I'm very curious how he navigates this, because there's no

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Speaker 2: way he doesn't see the amount of protests that are

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Speaker 2: happening right now all over the United States and the

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Speaker 2: world and not think that that may factor into what

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Speaker 2: is going to happen in November of twenty twenty four.

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Speaker 2: There has to be But I also wouldn't put it

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Speaker 2: past him to just be like, well, if we just

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Speaker 2: have the media drown out any voices of dissent, then

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Speaker 2: we can manufacture the needed consent to go through with

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Speaker 2: something like this, to support something like this, and maybe

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Speaker 2: it'll just be a fraction of people. But it's like

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Speaker 2: it's like as people, I think a lot of us

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Speaker 2: are like we see the way the world has been

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Speaker 2: working for the last century, and we're like, this is

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Speaker 2: actually all fucked up, Like everything we have is built

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Speaker 2: on a pile of bodies where we don't fucking give

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Speaker 2: what's due to working people, Like everything's all over the place.

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Speaker 2: But like the leaders of the you know, the modern

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Speaker 2: world are still very much caught in like this old

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Speaker 2: century way of looking at things, and you're you're starting

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Speaker 2: to see like how the how that friction is manifesting

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Speaker 2: more and more, but it seems like they have no

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Speaker 2: interest in it in like addressing it in any meaningful way.

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Speaker 2: So I don't know, I would hope that he would

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Speaker 2: say something to you know, that bare minimum toward a ceasefire,

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Speaker 2: let alone moving on to the next part of like

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Speaker 2: what occupying Gaza looks like in the West Bank, but

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Speaker 2: one horrific step at a time, it seems while you know,

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Speaker 2: we just are keep just a NonStop onslaught of like

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Speaker 2: really really tragic headlines. Yeah, all right, let's take a

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Speaker 2: quick break and we'll be right back. And we're back,

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Speaker 2: and people are walking into public places wearing like meta

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Speaker 2: headsets essentially, which this is different from the Google glasses

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Speaker 2: because they are full on virtual reality headsets.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The thing that they're carrying in is I don't know,

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Speaker 1: it's like augmented reality where it looks like they're just

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Speaker 1: holding inside the augmented reality like they've imaginatively made it.

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Speaker 1: So you're holding an iPad like it doesn't the heads

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Speaker 1: up display is like still on an iPad that you're

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Speaker 1: holding in your hand for some reason.

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Speaker 2: But I don't know this man, just don't whatever, you know,

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Speaker 2: get get your get your fucking wallet taken out of

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Speaker 2: your pocket because you're too busy with your fucking yeah

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Speaker 2: goggles on. I I thought this was talking about those

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Speaker 2: sunglasses that had the cameras built in, but I didn't

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Speaker 2: know people were talking about.

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Speaker 4: Full on, full on VR heads shit.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just being like this is the future, guys looking

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Speaker 1: like shit, Uh, but yeah, I don't know, fucking bummer.

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Speaker 1: It truly is the Apple one, like I feel like,

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Speaker 1: is when we're gonna really start seeing it if they ever.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, like, that's that product off the ground because it's got.

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Speaker 2: Like brand prestige for consumers, you know, like's not out

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Speaker 2: here with some meda quest. I'm out here with my

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Speaker 2: five thousand dollars.

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Speaker 3: Whatever the fuck it costs. Thing. It's wild. I mean again,

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie.

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Speaker 2: I do want to see what it's like to watch

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Speaker 2: a movie on those goggles, just to see what that's like.

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Speaker 2: But other than that, there's no way I could ever

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Speaker 2: wear that in public, like a your part of me

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Speaker 2: is like I remember being a kid and I got

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Speaker 2: the when I was running track in high school. I

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Speaker 2: got these noose track spikes that was so proud of,

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Speaker 2: and I fucking like I was kind of being flashy

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Speaker 2: with them at a meat somebody straight up took fucking

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Speaker 2: jack that shit when I was off your feet. Oh no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: I had him off like after a race and I

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Speaker 2: had the like and I have my back turn and

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Speaker 2: somebody came through and nicked them. And ever since then,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, you know what, you don't really need to

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Speaker 2: be out here flash and shit. Yeah, you know what,

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Speaker 2: I mean, and then with this, like most death says

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Speaker 2: mister fashion, that sty will never last long.

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Speaker 3: The harder you flash, harder you get flashed on.

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Speaker 4: There it is all right.

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Speaker 1: Is there a more terrifying sentence in the English language

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Speaker 1: than Kevin Spacey made a surprise appearance. No, he just

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Speaker 1: showed up at an Oxford lecture and received standing ovation.

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Speaker 4: I saw.

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Speaker 2: I saw the headline that was Kevin Spacey received standing

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Speaker 2: ovation at Oxford University on like lecture about cancel culture.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so it is a writer and free speech advocate

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Speaker 1: Douglas Murray, who was giving a speech all about the

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Speaker 1: evils of cancel culture, and Kevin Spacey came out and

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Speaker 1: did a five minute scene from Shakespeare's Timon of Athens sadly.

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Speaker 1: Zero scenes from Barry Sonenfeld's Nine Lives unfortunately, which we

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Speaker 1: talked talked about recently as how that career went out,

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Speaker 1: how Barry Sonefeld's career ended as a feature filmmaker.

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Speaker 4: But yeah, the lecture, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: This, This seems to be I think we're we're seeing

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Speaker 1: it also with Gaza, where you know the old heads

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Speaker 1: at Ivy League schools are like these these damn children

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Speaker 1: or like the Wall Street Journal had that op ed

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Speaker 1: that was like, don't hire my students because they criticized Israel,

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Speaker 1: And I don't I don't know like all the details

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Speaker 1: of like what the student groups are saying.

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Speaker 2: It's just interesting to use your power to yes, be

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Speaker 2: like I'm going to an op ed to blunt the

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Speaker 2: future of these people anyways, But it's like, who are

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Speaker 2: the people even fucking throwing this, Like, obviously it can't

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Speaker 2: be like a group of upstanding people if you're like

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Speaker 2: and here to do a fucking monologue is Kevin Spacey, y'all,

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Speaker 2: let's give it up.

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Speaker 1: The lecture was actually a memory of the late philosopher

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Speaker 1: Sir Roger Scutten, who they believe the organizers of the

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Speaker 1: lecture is a victim of cancel culture, because he was

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Speaker 1: fired from his role as a government housing advisor in

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Speaker 1: twenty nineteen merely for spreading anti Semitic conspiracy theories. Oh

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Speaker 1: he also also yeah, he's he covered a lot of

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Speaker 1: ground here. Actually, he also claimed that Islamophobia had been

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Speaker 1: invented by the Muslim Brotherhood in order to stop discussion

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Speaker 1: of a major issue. So he was, you know, he

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Speaker 1: was all, you know, covered a lot of ground. And

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Speaker 1: you know, the these people were just Kevin Spacey and

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Speaker 1: his friends at Oxford were just impressed by his ability

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Speaker 1: to you know, it's a shame be a piece of shit.

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Speaker 2: Sir Roger Scruton could have had a heck of a

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Speaker 2: career working for the US government.

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Speaker 4: But that's right.

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Speaker 1: Well, anyways, according to the lecture, the play Timon of

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Speaker 1: Athens is about a guy who is generous to all,

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Speaker 1: but when he falls on hard times, everybody deserts him,

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Speaker 1: which doesn't seem like it's exactly the same as Kevin

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Speaker 1: Spacey's situation. Like in that play, timone is generous and

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Speaker 1: gives away all his money to his friends and when

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Speaker 1: he's broke, none of them will help him, which I

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Speaker 1: don't know, it.

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Speaker 4: Feels like slightly different.

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Speaker 1: I can't put my finger on, like how it's different

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Speaker 1: from the racist philosopher or from sexual predator Kevin Spacey,

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Speaker 1: but right, right, it's just like something different.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm glad they found they found their king. I guess.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, at Oxford.

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Speaker 2: Well there's all's there's all kinds of cool stuff happening

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Speaker 2: around the world.

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Speaker 1: That's right, Well, that is going to do it for

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Speaker 1: us this Tuesday, October seventeenth. We are back tomorrow with

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Speaker 1: a whole last episode of the show. Until then, be

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Speaker 1: kind to each other, be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine,

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Speaker 1: don't do nothing about white supremacy, and we will talk

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Speaker 1: to you all tomorrow.

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Speaker 4: Bye bye,