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Speaker 1: Who's up for some scrubbing in.

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Speaker 2: I'm always up for some scrubbing in. You know, I

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Speaker 2: scrubbing in with Belly an iHeartRadio podcast. Hello everybody, we

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Speaker 2: are scrubbing in. And it's me and it's Tanya, and

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Speaker 2: it's Mark Hi in easty.

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Speaker 3: I have been so excited for today because I really

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Speaker 3: missed you.

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Speaker 2: I saw you on Friday. It's Monday for reference.

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Speaker 3: For reference, it's been that was a very long weekend

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Speaker 3: and I only saw you on Friday for a very

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Speaker 3: short amount of time.

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Speaker 2: It was about I would stay close to an hour

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Speaker 2: that we.

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Speaker 3: Were definitely not I was there for fifteen minutes.

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Speaker 2: No, first of all, it was definitely not fifteen minutes. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: she came over because you were looking for an outfit

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Speaker 2: for the Night to Shine. That's right, and we found one.

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Speaker 3: We found one.

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Speaker 2: See Tanya is in She normally for events, well dress

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Speaker 2: a little more on the like sexy side of things. Yes,

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Speaker 2: I said, you gotta you gotta keep it classy on

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Speaker 2: this one. You gotta keep it.

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Speaker 1: For Night to Shine.

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Speaker 2: Modest is hottest. Yeah, is hottest for Night to Shine.

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Speaker 1: Explain Night to Shine for people who don't know, Okay, and.

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Speaker 3: Also I knew that myself. Like when I went we

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Speaker 3: went to Chalk Prom, I wore like a really not

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Speaker 3: like it was scandalous. I can't remember what it was

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Speaker 3: like brown velvet dress. It was cute, modest.

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Speaker 2: That one that your leg was like it was like

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Speaker 2: come to your like crotch. Well, first of all, let's

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Speaker 2: not compare what you wore to Night to Shine and

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Speaker 2: what you were to talk about. Okay, it was cute

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Speaker 2: for sure.

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Speaker 3: Night to Shine is basically an event that the Tim

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Speaker 3: Tiba Foundation does. They do them all across the country

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Speaker 3: and other countries. I believe yes, there's about five hundred

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Speaker 3: over five hundred, and they all happen the same night,

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Speaker 3: and it's a prom for people with special needs, and

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Speaker 3: it's so beautiful, like when they have people like roll

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Speaker 3: up in limos and then they have a red carpet

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Speaker 3: that they all walk down and everybody like cheers them on,

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Speaker 3: and then there's like karaoke and there's like a little

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Speaker 3: bar where people are not bar bar, but like a bar,

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Speaker 3: like a makeup bar and like get your nails done.

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Speaker 3: And there's like a beauty bar, beauty bar, and like

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Speaker 3: a dance floor and then towards the end of the night,

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Speaker 3: they crown every guest like king and queen, everybody gets

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Speaker 3: to be crowned, and like it was really emotional.

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Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah, I would. I can totally see

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Speaker 2: how that'd be emotional.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And Chad reached my pastor was there and Julia,

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Speaker 3: his wife, and they got to walk their daughter Georgia

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Speaker 3: down and that was like watching her get crowned. I

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Speaker 3: was just it was like really emotional. Yeah, it was like,

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Speaker 3: all yeah, it was beautiful. It's such a beautiful thing that.

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Speaker 2: How long has she been doing it?

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Speaker 3: That's a good question. I don't actually don't.

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Speaker 1: Know what's the question. How long has Tim Tebow been

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Speaker 1: doing this? Yeah, because it's his foundation that puts these together. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't know the answer to that.

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Speaker 3: I don't know the answer that either.

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Speaker 1: I just want to make clear talking about Tim Tebow

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Speaker 1: and if you don't know the situation Kanye was planning

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Speaker 1: to meet Tim.

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Speaker 2: Tebow there, Okay, this has been just dragging on, like

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Speaker 2: it's just one of those things where there's just one

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Speaker 2: what's it called, like one degree of separation every time

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Speaker 2: as far as like you were, we could have gone

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Speaker 2: to eat or you could have one was after oh yeah,

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Speaker 2: after the AMAS Yeah. Yeah, and he was sitting at

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Speaker 2: the table next to all your friends, and it's like,

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Speaker 2: these things keep happening, whether he's at church or whatever,

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Speaker 2: and we just keep missing him. So I thought, this

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Speaker 2: is gonna be the night where she meets him. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and what happened, But maybe that's it.

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Speaker 1: Maybe the universe keeps trying to put you guys together.

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Speaker 1: But that wasn't the night. But it will happen, and

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Speaker 1: it will happen when you least expect it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I was thinking about that on the drive here.

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Speaker 2: I was thinking, you know what, maybe that I feel

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Speaker 2: like that night for him, there's so much going on

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Speaker 2: that your interaction with him at most would have been like.

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Speaker 3: Hey, hey, yeah, and as it should have been, you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean. Like and for me too, Like

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Speaker 3: I had the best time. I was like dancing the

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Speaker 3: whole night, I made a bunch of new friends, you know,

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Speaker 3: Like it was it was just so much about not me,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like it was such a

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Speaker 3: great night that I had the same feeling, although like

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Speaker 3: it was like I also realized how many people are

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Speaker 3: so invested because I have never been inundated with so

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Speaker 3: many messages. And I also realized too, For some reason,

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Speaker 3: I think of this podcast as like we have our listeners,

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Speaker 3: and then I work on the Ryan Secrets on Earth

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Speaker 3: Ryan Secrets, and we have those listeners. I didn't realize

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Speaker 3: how many. I had no idea until until this Timpty

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Speaker 3: Bow thing because yeah, and these but everybody was saying.

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Speaker 3: I listened to the podcast in the morning show and

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Speaker 3: ball like, it was just like I got inundated with

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Speaker 3: a lot.

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Speaker 2: Well, I was going to ask you, did you feel

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Speaker 2: like not because it wasn't like you had any control

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Speaker 2: over the situation like him not being there, But did

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Speaker 2: you feel like this like pressure, like like you let

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Speaker 2: like not that you let everyone down, but that I'm sorry, no, no, yeah,

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Speaker 2: because everyone I was reading like comments and stuff, and

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Speaker 2: people were messaging me because they're like keep me posted,

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Speaker 2: and they're like why aren't you with her? And I

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Speaker 2: almost like just got dressed and was gonna go with

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Speaker 2: you when you said that no one could go. But

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Speaker 2: I also like I was so anxious to hear it.

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Speaker 2: I was like nervous, you.

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Speaker 3: Know, it's so and I don't get that's the thing

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Speaker 3: that's so sad is I don't get nervous at all

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Speaker 3: for anything, and I was nervous for I don't I

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Speaker 3: can't think because now it's just been so blown out

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Speaker 3: of it right.

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Speaker 1: All of Thursday on the Secret Show. We talked about

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Speaker 1: it all of Friday, and then he said to you,

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Speaker 1: don't tell anyone anything till eight o'clock Monday morning, and

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Speaker 1: then we'll just tease it all morning long. So you knew.

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Speaker 1: You were like, oh.

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Speaker 2: Man, you were really funny on Ryan Show, and when

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Speaker 2: you were like so calm, cool, collected, and then as

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Speaker 2: soon as the call is ever it was like, well

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Speaker 2: the cool and then he said something. You were like,

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Speaker 2: should I do blah blah blah. I can't remember what

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Speaker 2: it was, and they were like no.

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Speaker 3: No, no, no, no no, yeah Ry Ryan told me to

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Speaker 3: bring him a booteneer. Yeah, Ryan, I liked it. And

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Speaker 3: then I said, oh, maybe I should bring him like

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Speaker 3: one of your ties. Oh that was distinction Ties.

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Speaker 2: Such a terrible idea. It would have been so awkward.

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Speaker 1: Here is Tanya being cool with Tim Tebow.

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Speaker 4: Really good talking to you guys, and Donia. Maybe we'll

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Speaker 4: see you tomorrow night.

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Speaker 3: Sounds good. Can't wait?

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Speaker 4: All right, thank you have a wonderful day.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't picture her just like with the biggest smile

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Speaker 2: on her face, like, oh, just holding everything she can back,

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Speaker 2: taking every part of power that she has in her body.

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Speaker 3: But so and so, I I kind of was in

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Speaker 3: my head a lot that night because I'm like, this

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Speaker 3: guy probably thinks if he, if anybody that he knows

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Speaker 3: listens to the show, I come off sounding so crazy.

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Speaker 3: And I was like, this guy probably thinks I'm so psycho.

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Speaker 3: And I was talking to our friend Graham Bun.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, I've.

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Speaker 1: Mentioned, oh my god, guy, like I've never heard of

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Speaker 1: this guy I twelve times today.

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Speaker 3: Well, I talked to him a lot at that night,

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Speaker 3: and he was like, that's so great, like about Tim,

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Speaker 3: And I was like, yeah, he probably thinks I'm such

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Speaker 3: a creep. And he was like, are you crazy. We're

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Speaker 3: all friends with you, We love you, if you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean, Like he knows, like he knows that

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Speaker 3: you're friends with all of that, right, Okay, at least like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, people, well.

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Speaker 1: If Tim got five percent of the inundation that you got,

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Speaker 1: he's very aware of what's going on, right, right, don't

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Speaker 1: we think?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? For sure? I mean she's I bet people have

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Speaker 2: tagged her in all a lot of his posts or

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Speaker 2: sent messages, Like if he checks any of that, he's.

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Speaker 3: Probably I don't know if guys check all their stuff

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Speaker 3: like girls do.

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Speaker 1: But again, if he got any of it, if he

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Speaker 1: checked any he.

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Speaker 2: Even was just checking to see if, like what the

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Speaker 2: people were saying about Night to Shine, he probably saw

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Speaker 2: your name somewhere.

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Speaker 1: So we never really said Tanya went and he didn't

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Speaker 1: show up because he was held up at other events,

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Speaker 1: so he didn't end up at the same one. So disappointing. However,

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Speaker 1: and this is, by the way, this is breaking news.

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Speaker 1: This is an exclusive to Scrubbing It with Becca Tillic.

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Speaker 1: So Amy was not here today, but you know Amy,

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Speaker 1: she's on here usually she reached out to Tim's people

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Speaker 1: while coming back on the Seacrest Show.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we shall also preface that Ryan is very.

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Speaker 1: Tim says he will come back on we're working on Wednesday,

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Speaker 1: Valentine's Day. But the question is would he agree to

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Speaker 1: come back on if he was aware of this. I

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Speaker 1: think he has to be aware of this, and that's

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Speaker 1: why he's agreed to come back on.

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Speaker 2: Wait, so he's going to be in the studio.

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Speaker 1: I don't know about that. Oh, but he's willing to

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Speaker 1: return to the show this week. Maybe, uh huh, maybe.

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Speaker 2: How are you going to be able to hold it

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Speaker 2: together to phone calls in a row?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but then it's like then what again?

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Speaker 1: I know, but see I don't think so. I think

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Speaker 1: Ryan's going to be more Yeah, the rest of this time.

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Speaker 1: I think he's gonna let it lift up the hurt

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Speaker 1: and let him know what's going on.

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Speaker 2: Well. It was really funny because he was asking like

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Speaker 2: what side of the bed does he sleep on? And

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Speaker 2: it was actually a really funny bit. Like poor guy

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Speaker 2: was probably like this is the weirdest interview.

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Speaker 3: Know, Like Ryan puts him on hold and he's like,

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Speaker 3: oh my god. We're like oh.

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Speaker 2: It was like a full blown celebration everyone just because

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Speaker 2: he was like maybe we'll maybe I'll see you there.

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Speaker 2: You want to keep her post. As it turned out,

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Speaker 2: let's just say like when you meet him, the story

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Speaker 2: is just everyone's gonna be so excited.

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Speaker 3: It's just a lot.

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Speaker 1: And so you had to decide what to wear. No One,

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Speaker 1: you're going to a charity event for special needs children,

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Speaker 1: but you also want to look good for Tim Tebow.

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Speaker 1: That's a tough lined walk.

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Speaker 3: I think I had a perfect thing for her. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: that had not just one, she had three.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this red outfit was yours.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and it was like a classy jumpsuit that was

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Speaker 2: like it was red, so it had like that sexy

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Speaker 2: vibe that was like appealing but also was like you

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Speaker 2: looked very classy.

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Speaker 3: I think we did a morning hack once that said

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Speaker 3: the best color to wear on a date is red.

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Speaker 3: Oh really, m hmm.

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Speaker 1: I think that's right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it is right. I remember. It's like the

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Speaker 3: good ones.

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Speaker 2: I store the important one. So I went to Santa

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Speaker 2: Barbara this weekend, and I don't know why. I think

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Speaker 2: I think talking to the psychiatrist kind of got me.

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Speaker 2: Like I'm like, Okay, maybe I need to put myself

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Speaker 2: out there more and not be so scared of what

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Speaker 2: might happen and focus on like the good things.

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Speaker 3: This is good, this is progress.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So I re downloaded dating app Oh yeah all right,

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Speaker 2: Yeah that's about as far as we got. So I

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Speaker 2: downloaded them. I matched with the v people, but I

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Speaker 2: was like, you know what, maybe I just I'm so

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Speaker 2: like the thought of going on a date sounds so scary.

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Speaker 2: It's just like getting ready going off the stranger. I'm small,

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Speaker 2: I already did it a few weeks ago. I'm not

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Speaker 2: saying I'm like incapable, but it's like I think in

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Speaker 2: my head, I think of how that went and how

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Speaker 2: it was not a waste of time, But there is

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Speaker 2: nothing for like.

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Speaker 3: That's what dating is. That it is a lot of

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Speaker 3: waste of time.

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Speaker 1: Nothing came out of that, right, you were not totally

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Speaker 1: against a second date, but he never reached out.

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Speaker 2: He did, I just didn't reach the pack.

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Speaker 3: That's okay, because if you're not feeling it, like you're

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Speaker 3: not feeling it, I don't know what's so funny because

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Speaker 3: dating is a waste of time.

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Speaker 2: That's the worst way of looking at it, because but

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Speaker 2: it's so true.

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Speaker 3: But you need to do it. It's like a necessary evil.

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Speaker 3: Is that the right phrase?

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Speaker 2: But I liked the fact that when Robert and I

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Speaker 2: started dating that we were friends first. It is comfortable.

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Speaker 3: But that doesn't happen always, you know.

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Speaker 2: But I want to be friends with whoever I start dating,

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Speaker 2: but you will be you will get to that. So

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Speaker 2: I start dating them and.

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Speaker 3: We're like and they need to come back friends.

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Speaker 2: That's not how dating works. That's not how you go

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Speaker 2: into a date.

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Speaker 1: Not really, you don't go into.

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Speaker 2: A date like wanting a best friend.

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Speaker 4: You go and.

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Speaker 1: One of the points along the progression.

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Speaker 2: Toddy was like on b FF Bumble, like why can't

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Speaker 2: I find them?

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Speaker 1: It's like, all girls, can you beat that casual on

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Speaker 1: a date together? You just downloaded every so often and

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Speaker 1: then delete them and then download them time on your

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Speaker 1: bio and everything else in there.

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Speaker 2: My brain is so casual. Everything's so casual.

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Speaker 1: So do you go through and answer all the questions

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Speaker 1: about your favorite?

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Speaker 3: Doesn't you don't know about I don't because there's like

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Speaker 3: two questions on hand.

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Speaker 2: There's like I think three or four questions and you

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Speaker 2: have pictures in between. Oh really funny. Yeah, he is

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Speaker 2: actually pretty entertaining because it's like I was saying, yeah,

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Speaker 2: he just get one of the guys. It was like

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Speaker 2: the biggest pet peeve and he was like when someone

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Speaker 2: says both instead of both, So that's not Tanya's. You'd

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Speaker 2: have to really.

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Speaker 3: Focus on yeah, and then I'd be like paranoid the

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Speaker 3: deal breaker. But this is exciting, This is a breakthrough moment.

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Speaker 3: I'm glad you're putting yourself out there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I just feel like, whatever the reasons are that

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Speaker 2: I have that. And I got so many messages about

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Speaker 2: listening to the last six podcast and there.

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Speaker 1: Were a lot of em.

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Speaker 3: Really, what were people saying?

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Speaker 1: Well, they loved it, they loved how open she was

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Speaker 1: that I was very brave of Becca to go through

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Speaker 1: that stuff. A lot of people related to what she

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Speaker 1: was saying to the therapist. Do I think it helped

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Speaker 1: them as well?

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Speaker 3: Oh that's so interesting that, Like, I guess for me,

301
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Speaker 3: what I took away from it with you is that

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Speaker 3: you fear the You fear like a break you feel

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Speaker 3: you fear that the person's being taken away from you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess it's like a fear of like something

305
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Speaker 2: going bad. It's not so much like it's whether I

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Speaker 2: lose feelings or they lose feelings something morbid. I don't know.

307
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Speaker 3: Wait, what did it come down to being open to

308
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Speaker 3: the possibility but not attached to the outcome?

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Speaker 2: Was that y'all's quote? That wasn't what she said?

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Speaker 1: Though?

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Speaker 3: No, no, no, okay. I was like, I feel like I've

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Speaker 3: heard that.

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Speaker 1: Before, Tanya. On your way up here today you texted

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Speaker 1: or something that was very interesting?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, oh yeah, my own sexy face.

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Speaker 3: I want to talk about that, but I also want

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Speaker 3: to know are you going to keep seeing a therapist

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Speaker 3: you think? Or like I mean no, No.

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Speaker 2: I mean the thing is if I if I really

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Speaker 2: wanted to dive into this and talk to someone, I

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Speaker 2: think after thinking about it some and like actually talk,

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Speaker 2: having this short conversation I had with her like opened

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Speaker 2: a lot of why I fear relationships. Like it was

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Speaker 2: almost like an aha moment that's exciting, which I think

325
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Speaker 2: I subconsciously knew all this time, but it was interesting

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Speaker 2: talk it out and like having someone like bring like

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Speaker 2: actually put into words. I guess. But yeah, I feel

328
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Speaker 2: like I'm going through an unsexy phase and I don't

329
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Speaker 2: know if that's the right way.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I was like, I don't know what this means. Okay,

331
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Speaker 3: like are you drooling or like what's happening?

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Speaker 4: No?

333
00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:22,440
Speaker 2: No, No, it's like a I don't know it's I

334
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:26,360
Speaker 2: think it's it's more of a mental thing than it

335
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:32,120
Speaker 2: is like a physical thing. You know, so clearly let

336
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Speaker 2: me Okay, So I feel like around or last year,

337
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Speaker 2: maybe in the summertime.

338
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Speaker 3: Oh wow, this goes back.

339
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Speaker 2: No no, no, I'm just saying, yeah, this kind of goes back,

340
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Speaker 2: I feel like I could go out. First of all,

341
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Speaker 2: I was more into like going out and being social,

342
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Speaker 2: and I felt like I could go out and if

343
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Speaker 2: I walked into a place like a bar or something.

344
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Speaker 2: I never and this is a little bit arrogant, but

345
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Speaker 2: I never was like in my head, I was like, well,

346
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Speaker 2: I won't probably won't have to pay for drinks tonight,

347
00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:01,920
Speaker 2: you know, Like I was like, someone's gonna pay attention

348
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:05,080
Speaker 2: to me. At the time, I think Robert and I

349
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,160
Speaker 2: were kind of on and off, so I think I

350
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:11,160
Speaker 2: had the confidence of like him like I had like

351
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,520
Speaker 2: we were kind of still together, so I had him.

352
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:16,320
Speaker 2: But also and it wasn't like, oh I'm looking for

353
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Speaker 2: someone to like hook up with anything, but I just

354
00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:21,720
Speaker 2: thought I would. I do have attention. Lately, I feel

355
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:24,320
Speaker 2: like I don't have that. Like it's not that I'm

356
00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:27,880
Speaker 2: not confident or think that I'm like unattractive or anything,

357
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:33,080
Speaker 2: but I don't have that like air of I don't

358
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Speaker 2: even know what it would be.

359
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:37,720
Speaker 3: Called, like normal, What that's normal?

360
00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:40,640
Speaker 2: Oh, Like you're saying an air of normal, that air

361
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:44,040
Speaker 2: of like, oh, I'm gonna I feel confident walking into

362
00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,760
Speaker 2: this place by myself or going out and feeling like

363
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,600
Speaker 2: I can go up to the bar and someone's gonna

364
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Speaker 2: offer to buy me a drink.

365
00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:52,680
Speaker 1: Is it a feeling you have or is it a

366
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:55,320
Speaker 1: are you not getting the response that you normally get.

367
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Speaker 2: It's a feeling I have. Okay, I haven't I haven't

368
00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:01,160
Speaker 2: really gone out, and I don't know if it's like

369
00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:04,240
Speaker 2: the winter. It's just like I'm in like that, yeah,

370
00:17:04,359 --> 00:17:05,920
Speaker 2: and I don't want to go out.

371
00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:09,280
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's just like half the country

372
00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,600
Speaker 1: as zero degrees right now. You guys are complaining it's

373
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:14,800
Speaker 1: too called at six, I'm saying it's freezing.

374
00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:16,639
Speaker 2: It's below seventy right now.

375
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Speaker 3: And it's true. I don't like to go out when

376
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:23,920
Speaker 3: it's like below sixty. This morning i left the house.

377
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,280
Speaker 3: I was like forty five night.

378
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:30,440
Speaker 2: And it really close down. Yeah, but I think it's

379
00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:32,560
Speaker 2: just like I don't really even have any desire to

380
00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:35,920
Speaker 2: go out and experience. I guess it's like I don't

381
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:39,639
Speaker 2: even care, you know, Like last year I felt like

382
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:43,040
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I want that attention or I

383
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:44,520
Speaker 2: want to feel that way, And I don't know if

384
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:45,960
Speaker 2: it's because I'm just like I don't care.

385
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,800
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I mean I just don't think that you.

386
00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:54,480
Speaker 3: I think you're in a phase of not I think

387
00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:57,000
Speaker 3: right now, to you, dating is more work than like

388
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:00,159
Speaker 3: it's hard to explain. I can't It's like, you know,

389
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 3: I can't really put my finger on her, you know,

390
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,280
Speaker 3: you think you put it there and then she flies

391
00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:08,000
Speaker 3: over here. But like it's it's like you want marriage

392
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:13,880
Speaker 3: and family and kids. Uh huh, but not quite right now,

393
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:15,400
Speaker 3: because you're enjoying being single.

394
00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:18,359
Speaker 2: And I think but I'm I mean, I'm enjoying being single,

395
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:21,080
Speaker 2: but not in the way that most people enjoy being

396
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:24,760
Speaker 2: not the standard enjoy being single, Like I'm not going

397
00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:27,160
Speaker 2: out with different people, and like, right, right, right right,

398
00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:27,680
Speaker 2: I'm just.

399
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 3: But I think that there's something to be said about

400
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,320
Speaker 3: that too, Like I think so many people have said

401
00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:34,480
Speaker 3: to me, enjoy this time that you don't have. You know,

402
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,159
Speaker 3: you can say yes to plans if you want. You

403
00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 3: don't have to think about getting a sitter or like,

404
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:42,240
Speaker 3: you know, anything like that. So you are doing that.

405
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,359
Speaker 3: Just picked up and went to Stanta barber for the weekend.

406
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:46,880
Speaker 3: That's single freedom, girl.

407
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,640
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, I do a lot of like traveling, I mean,

408
00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:51,520
Speaker 2: that's kinda something I do.

409
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,160
Speaker 1: But when you go by yourself.

410
00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:54,360
Speaker 2: No, it's some girlfriends.

411
00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:55,560
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, fun.

412
00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:56,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was super fun.

413
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:58,840
Speaker 1: Is it normal for women to feel to go through

414
00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:03,160
Speaker 1: these un sexy phases? Erica says, yet, yeah.

415
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:07,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah. I mean I think it's hard to say

416
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,600
Speaker 3: because like, I've never been the person that like walks

417
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,800
Speaker 3: into a bar and is like, I've never had that.

418
00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:13,960
Speaker 3: It's weird because I feel like I'm a confident person,

419
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:15,639
Speaker 3: but I feel like I've never been that person that

420
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,400
Speaker 3: like walks into a bar, and it's like.

421
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:22,000
Speaker 2: I feel like lately, you've recently, you've felt that more

422
00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:24,080
Speaker 2: when you go out to places there's like.

423
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:27,040
Speaker 3: There's no guys, no guys.

424
00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:30,160
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, I talked about mojo. You got your mode.

425
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:33,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good way of putting it. Mojo.

426
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, my mojo is like at a medium.

427
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:42,600
Speaker 3: Yeah that's what I think. Okay, that was a good Yeah, you've.

428
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:45,320
Speaker 2: Really brought that back. Yeah, really brought that back. But yeah,

429
00:19:45,359 --> 00:19:47,560
Speaker 2: what I'm saying is I feel like I don't have

430
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:48,960
Speaker 2: I don't have my mojo.

431
00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:50,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, how do you regain it?

432
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:51,200
Speaker 2: I don't know.

433
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,720
Speaker 3: That's a good question. How do we get your motive?

434
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:55,880
Speaker 3: How did I get mine back?

435
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,239
Speaker 2: I think it was like you went out, you kind

436
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:03,160
Speaker 2: of went out and like some hot guys like hit

437
00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:05,399
Speaker 2: on you, and you're like felt like you were in

438
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:06,000
Speaker 2: control and.

439
00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:13,280
Speaker 3: That really hot one. Yeah he's but still very hot

440
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:21,120
Speaker 3: and couldn't date anyone he wanted. So I was like, damn, yes, yeah, okay, so.

441
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:27,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I need to put on a sexy Halloween costume. Yeah,

442
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:30,800
Speaker 2: which I guess my Halloween costume this year wasn't like

443
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:38,280
Speaker 2: sexy cline. Actually, what's his name? Is his name?

444
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,959
Speaker 3: Why don't we do something then? What why don't we

445
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:47,679
Speaker 3: get you on jazzed up and hit the town and

446
00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:50,520
Speaker 3: go somewhere where we can do so I can do

447
00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:53,600
Speaker 3: some research on like a cute place. It has to

448
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,720
Speaker 3: be a cute place for a lot of single men

449
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:59,840
Speaker 3: linger and we can just go parade you.

450
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:00,680
Speaker 1: Is it weird?

451
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:03,000
Speaker 2: Now? I want to be printed around like. I don't

452
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,760
Speaker 2: want it to be like intentional, like oh, we got

453
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:07,920
Speaker 2: to go out and find a man. I just want

454
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 2: to say, let's go out and peruse Yeah, but.

455
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:13,600
Speaker 3: We don't even want to find you a man. No, no, no, no,

456
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:17,840
Speaker 3: we just want you to to feel.

457
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,800
Speaker 2: Like maybe just like to feel confident and like excited

458
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,679
Speaker 2: to go out and have a fun night rather than

459
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,880
Speaker 2: feeling like, oh my god, this is terrible. I'm ready

460
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 2: to go home.

461
00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,080
Speaker 3: Let's do it. Let's make a date right now.

462
00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:29,160
Speaker 1: Okay, it is Valentine's Day week? Is that a weird

463
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,359
Speaker 1: weekend to go out? A lot of couples will be

464
00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:32,400
Speaker 1: going out this coming week.

465
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,560
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna have any mojo. That might kill my mojo.

466
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:37,840
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, because all the guys will be like with

467
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:38,840
Speaker 2: their girlfriends.

468
00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 3: Well, we're not going to we won't do it on Valentine's.

469
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:41,840
Speaker 1: Day or do you want to do it on val

470
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:44,400
Speaker 1: But the weekend after is just as bad, I would think.

471
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:45,520
Speaker 3: I don't think so.

472
00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,600
Speaker 1: No, that's when we're going out. That's when my wife

473
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:49,800
Speaker 1: and I are going out. Oh well, I think a

474
00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,200
Speaker 1: lot of couples are going out last weekend or next weekend.

475
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:52,560
Speaker 2: Yeah.

476
00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:55,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that we're going to halt it for a week.

477
00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:58,160
Speaker 2: We can try it, see how it feels, check out

478
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:04,159
Speaker 2: the vibe, talk out the scene. But I want to know, Like,

479
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:06,040
Speaker 2: so we go and we're just like.

480
00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,000
Speaker 3: No, we're gonna like make a plan, Like we're gonna

481
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:12,119
Speaker 3: get there and we're gonna scout out who's there, and

482
00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:16,720
Speaker 3: we're gonna people can see you right now, We're gonna

483
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:19,440
Speaker 3: scout out who's there, and then we're gonna go and

484
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:23,960
Speaker 3: we're gonna engage in conversation like Phoebe and and Rachel's status,

485
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:26,840
Speaker 3: like when they went out when we were talk.

486
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:30,880
Speaker 2: And then she met the guy I'm called and Ross intercepted.

487
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,760
Speaker 3: Okay, so like that, we're just gonna go talk to people.

488
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:37,160
Speaker 3: If we get numbers great, If we don't get numbers great,

489
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:40,880
Speaker 3: or if we give numbers, yeah, I mean whatever, get.

490
00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, it's there's a difference.

491
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,720
Speaker 3: Okay, but I think it could be super fun and

492
00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 3: just have no expectation of the night.

493
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:49,840
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm down.

494
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,600
Speaker 1: You only give numbers. You don't get numbers, Becca.

495
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:58,359
Speaker 2: No, I'm never like, hey, let me get your number. No,

496
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:00,640
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, totally, I do good number.

497
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,000
Speaker 3: Can I get your number in case you didn't get mine?

498
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:08,720
Speaker 2: Right in case of isn't and then she like checks

499
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:10,840
Speaker 2: it and then calls them to make sure it rings

500
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 2: in front of them.

501
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 3: I'm calling you right now. I'm calling you right now

502
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 3: your phone.

503
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 2: Oh man, this seems like so for sure we want

504
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:31,520
Speaker 2: to go together. Just kidding, Yeah, I know, I'm I'm good.

505
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:34,119
Speaker 2: Just don't do that with anyone me around.

506
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:39,280
Speaker 3: Excuse me? I did that after I cleared my throat

507
00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:40,720
Speaker 3: and then I touched the coffin.

508
00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:46,880
Speaker 2: I was like, what are you doing? Have you No?

509
00:23:46,960 --> 00:23:50,960
Speaker 3: This will be? This will just be. This is gonna be.

510
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:54,399
Speaker 3: Hashtag bring back Becca's mojo?

511
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,760
Speaker 2: Okay, we should start a hashtag? Yeah, maybe I should.

512
00:23:57,840 --> 00:23:59,800
Speaker 2: Maybe I should do something where I like make a

513
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:03,520
Speaker 2: no to go out every week, like it's aggressive. Maybe

514
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:07,679
Speaker 2: every other week, like to dinner with like girlfriends, okay, date, ok,

515
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:11,280
Speaker 2: Like that should be normal, right? Dinner with friends? Is

516
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:11,760
Speaker 2: that normal?

517
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 3: Once a week? Seems like a lot.

518
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:15,760
Speaker 1: You don't go out with your friends once a week?

519
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 2: Well I can, I can go with bread or something.

520
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:19,640
Speaker 2: You don't have to if you don't want to.

521
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,359
Speaker 3: Go no, no, no, I don't been saying, but like

522
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,359
Speaker 3: doesn't do a lot of people? Is that normal?

523
00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:26,160
Speaker 2: Like a lot of people do like dinner at least

524
00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:30,440
Speaker 2: once a week, maybe more, but don't want to.

525
00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 1: Since you're clearly free, you can go with Becca yeah, yeah, yeah,

526
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,400
Speaker 1: you're not busy going out with your friends obviously.

527
00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:42,480
Speaker 3: Nope. So what should the hashtag be?

528
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,400
Speaker 2: I like to bring back back as mojo or how

529
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:47,560
Speaker 2: Becky got her groove back.

530
00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:49,760
Speaker 1: That's a good hashtag.

531
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,720
Speaker 2: She's mad. She didn't think of it like.

532
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 3: Groove, but I just like mojo. Ow Becca got her

533
00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:57,680
Speaker 3: groove back. Kind of long.

534
00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:03,439
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I just never satisfied. One of the

535
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 2: reasons I don't like going out and being social is

536
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,200
Speaker 2: because I love my bed, which you know about me. Yeah,

537
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:09,000
Speaker 2: you also love your.

538
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:09,800
Speaker 3: Bed I loved.

539
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 2: I love my bed even more now because I got

540
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:14,600
Speaker 2: the bowl and Branch sheets that we've been talking about.

541
00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:18,720
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and I make the difference.

542
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,320
Speaker 2: They truly do. I washed them and slept on them

543
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:27,040
Speaker 2: this week for the first time. They're amazing. They're already soft.

544
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 2: I don't have to I don't feel like I need

545
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 2: to wash them a few more times to be ready.

546
00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:31,959
Speaker 3: What did I feel like you were sleeping on?

547
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:34,960
Speaker 2: Just like some clouds, which I think clouds are really cold,

548
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:35,520
Speaker 2: but these.

549
00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 3: Clouds are warm and cozy.

550
00:25:37,320 --> 00:25:37,720
Speaker 2: Yeah.

551
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 3: Yeah.

552
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 2: Everything Bowlin Branch makes is made from one hundred percent

553
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,440
Speaker 2: organic cotton, so they start off super soft. So that's

554
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 2: why they just start that way, and then they just

555
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:48,240
Speaker 2: continue to get softer.

556
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:53,639
Speaker 3: Honestly, though, sheets make the biggest difference. I had I

557
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:55,840
Speaker 3: bought a cheapy pair of sheets because I don't even

558
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:57,160
Speaker 3: know why I did it. I just saw some cute

559
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:58,879
Speaker 3: ones and I was like, not even in the mood

560
00:25:58,920 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 3: for sheets, and I use them and they were they

561
00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:06,119
Speaker 3: like scratched me, they like scratched my skin, and I

562
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 3: was like, where's my bowl.

563
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:09,919
Speaker 2: Yeah, Bowlin Branch, there's no scratch now.

564
00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:11,440
Speaker 3: I threw those old sheets right out.

565
00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. The good thing is you buy directly from them,

566
00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:18,880
Speaker 2: so you're essentially paying wholesale prices. Luxury sheets can cost

567
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:20,760
Speaker 2: up to one thousand dollars in the store, but Bolin

568
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:22,480
Speaker 2: Branch sheets are only a couple hundred bucks.

569
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 3: It's nice.

570
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 2: Yeah. Shipping is free, which we love, and you can

571
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:30,400
Speaker 2: try them for thirty nights, which you'll love every night

572
00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,920
Speaker 2: of those thirty nights. And if you don't love them,

573
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:35,160
Speaker 2: you can send them right back for a refine.

574
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 3: That's the best part.

575
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:38,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, so there's no risk and no reason to not

576
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:41,520
Speaker 2: give them a try. To get you started right now,

577
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 2: my listeners will get fifty dollars off your first set

578
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:48,160
Speaker 2: of sheets at Bowlinbranch dot com. Promo codebeca what color

579
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:49,119
Speaker 2: the sheets that you got?

580
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:51,720
Speaker 3: They're white, classic white, classic, love it.

581
00:26:51,840 --> 00:26:55,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, my bed looks so clean with them on right now.

582
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:59,840
Speaker 2: I bet yeah, they're fresh. So go to Bowlinbranch dot

583
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:02,720
Speaker 2: com today for fifty dollars off your first set of sheets.

584
00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:07,080
Speaker 2: That's b O L L and Branch dot Com promo

585
00:27:07,119 --> 00:27:12,560
Speaker 2: code beca one more time Bowlinbranch dot Com promo code Becca.

586
00:27:14,080 --> 00:27:17,240
Speaker 2: This is totally random, but I didn't watch Grays this

587
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,800
Speaker 2: week because but listen, I'm gonna tell you.

588
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:20,760
Speaker 3: Why I miss much.

589
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 2: This is wit. This is I realized something. When I

590
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:28,399
Speaker 2: get on Twitter and on Thursday nights, I get a

591
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 2: lot of tweets if the episode's really good. It's like

592
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 2: my whole title, like it's just like Becker, are you

593
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:34,639
Speaker 2: watching Grays? Are you watching grayz? Oh my gosh, this

594
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:36,400
Speaker 2: is so intense. I can't wait to hear what y'all

595
00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:39,960
Speaker 2: say about on the podcast this week. Not one tweet,

596
00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:42,679
Speaker 2: no one cared. And then I got messages and they

597
00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 2: were like, did you watch Grays? I didn't. It was

598
00:27:44,600 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 2: so boring. So I'll probably watch it today because I

599
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:49,040
Speaker 2: have a lot of laundry to catch up on.

600
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,680
Speaker 1: But I'm trying to defend it and I can't remember

601
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: what happens.

602
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,479
Speaker 3: That's the problem. I can tell you exactly what happened.

603
00:27:56,480 --> 00:28:01,000
Speaker 3: They're all, we do fight Arizona. We see her leg

604
00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:02,880
Speaker 3: they like showed her legs.

605
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:05,439
Speaker 1: But they recently remember that Bailey has a kid, and

606
00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:06,280
Speaker 1: now they remembered that.

607
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:12,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, so they definitely showed that. So they're all basically

608
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:14,520
Speaker 3: trying to It was what you read last week. They're

609
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:16,640
Speaker 3: all trying to find the different contest. But they are

610
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 3: trying to do Jackson is trying to do spray on skin.

611
00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 1: But then he changed his mind.

612
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,439
Speaker 3: Changed his mind. He's doing h I don't even know.

613
00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:29,440
Speaker 1: It's a more realistic female anatomy for transgender.

614
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:33,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's like taking some part of their I'm

615
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:35,320
Speaker 3: not going to pretend to know because it was a lot.

616
00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:38,760
Speaker 3: It was over my head. Yeah, it was a bad episode.

617
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:40,680
Speaker 1: I don't know if it was a badis it was

618
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 1: a bad episode.

619
00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 2: It's just why did they come out of the gate

620
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 2: so strong? It was like so like I think it

621
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:48,280
Speaker 2: was like three or four back to back, like really

622
00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:49,160
Speaker 2: good episodes.

623
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:52,280
Speaker 3: It's really just two really yeah, because it just came

624
00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:53,280
Speaker 3: back January eighteenth.

625
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:56,440
Speaker 2: No, but the finale was really good. So the Winter

626
00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:57,480
Speaker 2: finale was really.

627
00:28:57,360 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 1: Oh right, right, it was the girl they had operated

628
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:02,920
Speaker 1: on her brain. Who sang that was kind of good

629
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 1: last week? That was in this episode we're talking about,

630
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 1: but the girl who's singing and they'd operate on her brain.

631
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:11,600
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, I haven't watched that was it?

632
00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:11,840
Speaker 4: Yeah?

633
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 2: This week is bad.

634
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 3: It's bad.

635
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 2: Oh, Mark's trying so hard. Mark. I love like how

636
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:19,960
Speaker 2: much you tried to defend Grays. I love Grayce. I

637
00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:21,880
Speaker 2: want to be good even.

638
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:22,520
Speaker 1: When it's not good.

639
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 4: Though.

640
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,440
Speaker 1: It's like it's like you're going like you're home with family.

641
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,200
Speaker 2: That's exactly how I feel. But it's like hard to

642
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:30,120
Speaker 2: get excited, Like I don't feel like I have to

643
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:32,440
Speaker 2: watch it live when I'm readly like I'm not getting

644
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:33,360
Speaker 2: the response about it.

645
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:35,280
Speaker 1: You know, you had the woman who was in before

646
00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:37,640
Speaker 1: who came back and was growing tiny spleens in her body.

647
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:43,920
Speaker 2: Yes, now she has more tiny spleens sounds cute, tiny's cute.

648
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was one of Meredith's patience.

649
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:47,640
Speaker 1: I didn't mind it. I don't know, I wasn't bored.

650
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:49,640
Speaker 1: I didn't mind it. But you're right, it wasn't terribly

651
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:51,520
Speaker 1: memorable and it wasn't like, Oh I do.

652
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 3: Like Arizona and April are kind of into this they're

653
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 3: trying to find a cure for. I guess a lot

654
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,040
Speaker 3: of moms die giving birth.

655
00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:00,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, d I can't remember what was it?

656
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 2: Oh, was it how she lost the Matthew's patient or whatever? Wait,

657
00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:09,400
Speaker 2: so is what's April status right now? She did they

658
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:09,920
Speaker 2: address it?

659
00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:12,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's like dating that weird intern.

660
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,440
Speaker 1: She's dating the weird intern. Well, she's hooking up with.

661
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:18,600
Speaker 3: It's bad.

662
00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:20,600
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Okay, I don't want to.

663
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:21,320
Speaker 1: It's beneath her.

664
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 2: It's beneath her. She needs to be with Jackson.

665
00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:26,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, they just need to get back together.

666
00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 2: Okay. Going back to last week on the podcast, so

667
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,960
Speaker 2: much response, so many responsible We have so many emails

668
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,800
Speaker 2: that I don't think we'll get to all of them,

669
00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 2: but I want to do as many as we.

670
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,320
Speaker 1: Well, let's do the reactions to last week first, before

671
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 1: we go with the relationship questions like this one was

672
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:43,200
Speaker 1: very interesting?

673
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:43,880
Speaker 2: Which one.

674
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:46,680
Speaker 1: Alicia, who love the loved the episode. She thinks you're

675
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 1: a brave bear. She's curious if your relationship with Tanya

676
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 1: is another example of what you described with not wanting

677
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:56,760
Speaker 1: to get too close. Sounds like your other friends are

678
00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: fine with you having some space. Betania's neediness is really

679
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:03,920
Speaker 1: challenging you and causing you to stake your claim for independence. Also,

680
00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:06,760
Speaker 1: the way you make fun of her sometimes could be

681
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 1: an unconscious way of pushing her away so that you

682
00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 1: never let yourself get as fully close to her as

683
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:15,280
Speaker 1: you maybe secretly want. And maybe you're scared time you

684
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 1: will replace you with a guy one day, and you're

685
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,280
Speaker 1: protecting yourself in fear of that.

686
00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 3: Oh wow.

687
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,640
Speaker 1: Alicia says she has lost friends because of this. She

688
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,960
Speaker 1: keeps the bed arms length because she doesn't want to

689
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,120
Speaker 1: get hurt and she's lost friends. She doesn't want it

690
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 1: to happen to you, guys.

691
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 3: I do you know what? She brings up an interesting

692
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:34,600
Speaker 3: point about when people are single and then when they

693
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:38,080
Speaker 3: do go into a relationship. I think that your relationship

694
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:41,960
Speaker 3: with your friends changes no matter how hard you try

695
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:45,240
Speaker 3: to fight that. I think in the past I have

696
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:50,959
Speaker 3: my relationship has caused me to completely like lose all

697
00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:52,920
Speaker 3: my friendships, Like I just didn't invest because I was

698
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:56,600
Speaker 3: completely invested in my one relationship. Because I have done

699
00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:59,280
Speaker 3: that in the past, I will never do that again.

700
00:31:59,520 --> 00:32:02,600
Speaker 3: I will make my friendship such a huge part of

701
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:04,840
Speaker 3: my life. But it is interesting because I do think

702
00:32:04,880 --> 00:32:08,080
Speaker 3: that there is a little bit of a shift just naturally.

703
00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:10,120
Speaker 1: Becca, you were giggling through that whole email. But what

704
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 1: do you think.

705
00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:15,000
Speaker 2: I just was giggling because she said but Tania's neediness

706
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:21,760
Speaker 2: and quotes as you call it. I wish I could

707
00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:25,360
Speaker 2: read the email in the text from Tanya on a regular.

708
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:28,720
Speaker 3: It is interesting, though, because I feel like people that

709
00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 3: write us will always be like, I'm the Becca or

710
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 3: they like I'm the Tanya. Like there's very like stinct.

711
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:41,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah. The thing with Tanya, Tanya is probably

712
00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:46,960
Speaker 2: my only friend who can be as needy as she

713
00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:50,479
Speaker 2: is and still remains one of my best friends. You know,

714
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:52,760
Speaker 2: Like I don't know that I could have a whole

715
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:56,560
Speaker 2: slew of Tanya's. So she is definitely like that because

716
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:58,640
Speaker 2: all of my other friends are more like me, and

717
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:01,480
Speaker 2: they're in the sense they're independ and don't need like

718
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 2: like if we hang out, we catch up r you know,

719
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 2: there's no text in between or like reassurance that we

720
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:12,680
Speaker 2: love each other. And so I think with Tanya, it's

721
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 2: more like I have to kind of shift my as

722
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:19,280
Speaker 2: much as I can, like my way of thinking, to

723
00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:24,680
Speaker 2: like have sympathy and empathy and compassion when she is

724
00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 2: a little more needy than my other friends. But I'm

725
00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 2: very playful and make fun of all my friends. It's

726
00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 2: not I'm just sarcastic. That's not necessarily. I don't think

727
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,360
Speaker 2: I'm pushing her away in I never am trying to

728
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 2: be Like.

729
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 1: If Tanya got a boyfriend and all of a sudden,

730
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:42,880
Speaker 1: you'd go a week or two without hearing from her,

731
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 1: would that hurt your feelings? Would that make you sad?

732
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 2: No, I want to be honest. I would hope that

733
00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:52,720
Speaker 2: it wouldn't be so drastic that you you know, I would,

734
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:54,520
Speaker 2: and I'd probably call you out and be like, hey,

735
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:57,000
Speaker 2: obviously you're in a relationship now and that's where your

736
00:33:57,040 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 2: focus is. But like I do, like we're still friends.

737
00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:02,680
Speaker 3: I had hope that you would call me out if

738
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:03,440
Speaker 3: it was that drastic.

739
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would do that.

740
00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:06,680
Speaker 3: I never friends do that again, Like.

741
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:10,319
Speaker 2: I don't like when when girlfriends lose sight of that.

742
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:12,719
Speaker 3: I feel like when you were with Robert, like I mean,

743
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:14,759
Speaker 3: you were very fully invested in your relationship, and I

744
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:17,960
Speaker 3: still didn't feel like I didn't have enough attention from you.

745
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,680
Speaker 1: So does atleast you have a point here or no?

746
00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 2: I see, I see her point, but I don't feel

747
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 2: like that's necessarily the case in our friendship. I like

748
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:31,319
Speaker 2: adore Tanya, and I let her know even when, like

749
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 2: we joke a lot about her neediness and she and

750
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 2: she is needy, like she'll say it, but it's like,

751
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:39,680
Speaker 2: you know, we've kind of it's like, Okay, I I

752
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:41,880
Speaker 2: know who she is, she knows who I am. I

753
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,920
Speaker 2: know her personality. I know when it gets serious if

754
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:48,279
Speaker 2: she really needs my attention, and until then, I like

755
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:48,719
Speaker 2: to just.

756
00:34:49,640 --> 00:34:51,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, like Saturday night, I really needed her.

757
00:34:51,960 --> 00:34:54,719
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, no, okay, yeah, I was gonna bring

758
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 2: this up.

759
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,560
Speaker 3: I was watching the super Bowl episode of This Is Us.

760
00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:02,400
Speaker 3: I was a mess by myself and my FaceTime Becca

761
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:04,759
Speaker 3: because I just like needed somebody to like talk me

762
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:09,120
Speaker 3: off a ledge and I got the side buttoned her.

763
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:17,720
Speaker 2: No, I just let it. I just watched it ring. Okay.

764
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 2: But here's the thing. I'm in Santa Barbara with my

765
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:23,120
Speaker 2: other friends were like dancing, being like silly in the

766
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 2: hotel room. If I had answered and you were like

767
00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:28,760
Speaker 2: sobbing on the phone from This is Us, it would

768
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:33,520
Speaker 2: have really brought down Yeah. So I had to be like, okay, and.

769
00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:35,640
Speaker 3: Then what if it was something serious.

770
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:37,200
Speaker 2: I would hope you text me and say, hey, I

771
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 2: really need to tell you. But then I get on

772
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:41,600
Speaker 2: Twitter and she's all, I just watched this. I'm like,

773
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:44,480
Speaker 2: oh my god. I would have been so mad if

774
00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:45,720
Speaker 2: I answered, because she called.

775
00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:47,600
Speaker 3: Me back to back twice and I would just like.

776
00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:52,319
Speaker 2: I was a mess. Yeah, I've answered every time. She's

777
00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 2: like been sobbing watching Danny Dye again. I'm like, okay,

778
00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:59,800
Speaker 2: I yeah, this one's You're gonna have to call Pauline

779
00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 2: or something. All right.

780
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:05,440
Speaker 1: Well, Bailey has another theory, oh Bailey, which is a

781
00:36:05,480 --> 00:36:06,360
Speaker 1: great crazy anatomy.

782
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:07,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that.

783
00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 1: Okay. So she wonders if your feeling of independence and

784
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,000
Speaker 1: being in control of your own feelings could be a

785
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:18,080
Speaker 1: result of your relationships on The Bachelor. In those relationships,

786
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:19,799
Speaker 1: the guys were in control and you were not given

787
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:23,400
Speaker 1: any assurance or confirmation or affirmation in regards to your feelings.

788
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:25,560
Speaker 1: You get broken up with it any minute, no matter

789
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 1: what you did. I'm not sure I could be that

790
00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 1: vulnerable on a public platform, So major kudos to you. Also,

791
00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:32,960
Speaker 1: do is the any chance y'all could bring Robert on again?

792
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:35,840
Speaker 1: His perspective on all this I'm rooting for both of you, ladies.

793
00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:38,040
Speaker 1: Thanks for bringing so much joy to so many people.

794
00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:38,759
Speaker 1: Oh that's nice.

795
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:43,920
Speaker 3: And Bailey, Bailey, that's interesting. That is a really interesting question, Bailey.

796
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:47,680
Speaker 2: I've actually thought about that because it was such a weird,

797
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:49,800
Speaker 2: like you are in such a weird place on that

798
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:52,240
Speaker 2: show mentally, and you don't have any of the control

799
00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:55,400
Speaker 2: and all these producers like they're kind of telling you

800
00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:57,560
Speaker 2: what you want to hear, and then next thing you know,

801
00:36:57,640 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 2: you're in a limo being sent home, you know, And

802
00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:02,600
Speaker 2: so it is kind of a weird mental like it

803
00:37:02,640 --> 00:37:06,360
Speaker 2: plays a game with your head. I think, however, on

804
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:09,400
Speaker 2: the opposite side of that that show. Being on the show,

805
00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:13,319
Speaker 2: it they really those interviews that you do, like that

806
00:37:13,360 --> 00:37:15,160
Speaker 2: you see when it's just the person sitting in there.

807
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 2: Those are like these mini therapy sessions where they really

808
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:20,000
Speaker 2: go into like why do you think you feel like

809
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:22,840
Speaker 2: this about like being closed off or whatever? Like, So

810
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:25,359
Speaker 2: I think I opened up more on those shows, even

811
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:27,640
Speaker 2: though it didn't seem I think more so on Ben's

812
00:37:27,640 --> 00:37:30,759
Speaker 2: season because I was less like scared, right, But on

813
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:34,120
Speaker 2: Chris's season it was like I remember getting done, like

814
00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:35,880
Speaker 2: getting home and being like wow, I feel like I

815
00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 2: learned a lot about myself. But I don't know. I wasn't.

816
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:44,879
Speaker 2: I wasn't so invested in either of those relationships.

817
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,400
Speaker 3: But were you different, Like if you can think about

818
00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:49,719
Speaker 3: like you're ditting life before the show.

819
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I didn't have any I was. I

820
00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:58,280
Speaker 2: was like crazy about this guy. We've talked about him, Dez,

821
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:00,200
Speaker 2: Like I just thought he was the greatest, and I

822
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:04,360
Speaker 2: still think he's amazing. But I was so like consumed

823
00:38:04,400 --> 00:38:09,800
Speaker 2: by liking him that I never really dated or really

824
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 2: I've always been kind of staying offish and like push

825
00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:14,560
Speaker 2: guys away. I think push people away.

826
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,800
Speaker 3: So it wasn't the show then, No, it wasn't the show.

827
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:21,040
Speaker 2: But I do think there's something about I do maybe

828
00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 2: there is something about the show that I feel like, Oh,

829
00:38:23,520 --> 00:38:26,280
Speaker 2: that rejection of like it could come at any point,

830
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:29,080
Speaker 2: Like that opened my mind to thinking, like you don't

831
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 2: have control, Like you can lose control of the relationship

832
00:38:32,600 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 2: at any point, regardless of the situation.

833
00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 3: You're in, right right, Yeah, I'm wondering if I don't

834
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:43,799
Speaker 3: think I don't want to go there, I don't wait

835
00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 3: go I'm wondering if the Dees thing affected you more

836
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:48,840
Speaker 3: than you realize.

837
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:52,480
Speaker 2: Like him not wanting me back. Yeah, yeah, I would

838
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,839
Speaker 2: think that there was like a there was part of

839
00:38:55,880 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 2: that that was like I I because after I remember

840
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:03,760
Speaker 2: having this thought after in between like does and probably

841
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:06,239
Speaker 2: in between The Bachelor or whatever, where I thought, what

842
00:39:06,360 --> 00:39:10,239
Speaker 2: a terrible feeling to want someone so much and not

843
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,680
Speaker 2: be able to do anything about it, Like you don't

844
00:39:12,719 --> 00:39:14,920
Speaker 2: have control of their feelings, Like you only have control

845
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:17,839
Speaker 2: of your own feelings, right, And what a scary thing that,

846
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,640
Speaker 2: Like you could really fall for someone and have those

847
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:22,359
Speaker 2: feelings for someone and.

848
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:23,279
Speaker 3: Did not fall for you.

849
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, so common though I know, well, yeah, it's it's life, like,

850
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:31,160
Speaker 2: it's just it is what it is. But I remember thinking, like,

851
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:34,240
Speaker 2: what a helpless feeling to feel that way of, like, oh,

852
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,399
Speaker 2: I want that person so much and can't have them,

853
00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:38,359
Speaker 2: and there's nothing I can do about it, no.

854
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 3: Matter how great I am feel, right, I.

855
00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:45,000
Speaker 2: Mean yeah, to an extent, anyone, anyone who likes someone

856
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 2: who doesn't like them back, right, that feeling.

857
00:39:47,280 --> 00:39:48,759
Speaker 1: For those of us that don't know Dath, is there

858
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 1: anything we should know about him?

859
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:52,399
Speaker 2: Is he from your hometown or yeah he's from my hometown. Okay,

860
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:55,000
Speaker 2: he's amazing we're good. We grew up together and then

861
00:39:55,160 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 2: I he like went off to college and Yale and

862
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:03,520
Speaker 2: I was in San Diego, so it was never like practical.

863
00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:05,520
Speaker 2: But I just thought, but did you date.

864
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:07,480
Speaker 1: At one point, like in high school or anything.

865
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:09,839
Speaker 2: No, we just like would see each other when we

866
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:11,239
Speaker 2: were at home at the same time.

867
00:40:11,400 --> 00:40:13,000
Speaker 3: Or did you ever tell him that you had feelings

868
00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:15,960
Speaker 3: for him? Yeah, it was like a psycho and he

869
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:17,200
Speaker 3: just it was like, I don't.

870
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:19,279
Speaker 2: Like he liked me. It was just like never really

871
00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 2: enough to like do anything about it. You know. It

872
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:24,680
Speaker 2: was like he was so focused on what he was

873
00:40:24,719 --> 00:40:27,759
Speaker 2: doing right in his life that it was like never

874
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 2: enough to have like a across the country long distance relationship,

875
00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:33,560
Speaker 2: like he liked me, you know, like we if we

876
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:36,480
Speaker 2: saw each other, you know, it was fine, but we

877
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 2: just rarely saw each other. But yeah, I think there

878
00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:45,480
Speaker 2: was like that. I remember that feeling after, like with

879
00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:49,279
Speaker 2: the whole desk thing, like, oh, like it's so frustrating,

880
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:52,440
Speaker 2: so straight, Yeah, to have feelings for someone, Yeah, you

881
00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 2: can't fix it.

882
00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 1: Is he off the market at this point or what

883
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:56,759
Speaker 1: do we know about him?

884
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,200
Speaker 2: Yeah? I don't have any I don't know what his

885
00:40:59,320 --> 00:41:01,640
Speaker 2: dating situation is he back in Louisiana or no, he's

886
00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:06,399
Speaker 2: in New York. Okay, friends on social media and we're friends. Yeah,

887
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:08,560
Speaker 2: like we had he came in town recently and we

888
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:11,240
Speaker 2: went and had lunch and stuff.

889
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 1: But you don't know if he's in a relationship.

890
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:17,279
Speaker 2: I don't think he's. He wasn't at the time. Okay, interesting, Yeah,

891
00:41:17,960 --> 00:41:19,920
Speaker 2: so yeah, what was the question.

892
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 3: I don't think the Bachelor, But I do think there

893
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:25,960
Speaker 3: is really something to that, like when you're when you

894
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:28,560
Speaker 3: really like somebody so much and they don't feel that

895
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:32,160
Speaker 3: way about you, that really can leave a scar.

896
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:33,160
Speaker 1: Sure.

897
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:36,799
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's like do I go there again? Like

898
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 2: do I let myself be a little bit crazy again

899
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:43,680
Speaker 2: only to be like rejected or for the feelings to

900
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:44,800
Speaker 2: not be reciprocated.

901
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:50,240
Speaker 1: Jessica is mad at us I met at you, specifically Becca.

902
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:52,960
Speaker 1: She says, I'm an uncool thirty nine year old woman

903
00:41:52,960 --> 00:41:55,640
Speaker 1: who doesn't really know what a hashtag is. But Becca's

904
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:57,600
Speaker 1: text on Tanya's phone seems like a good to use

905
00:41:57,719 --> 00:42:02,239
Speaker 1: good time to use one hashtag? Disappointed, yeah, she says,

906
00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:04,640
Speaker 1: considering how much crap you all gave Tanda for her

907
00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:07,239
Speaker 1: text and she won and the supposedly unlimited options of

908
00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:09,960
Speaker 1: numbers in Tanya's phone book. I'm so disappointed that Becka

909
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:13,360
Speaker 1: texted her brother. Since Tanya is so bad at opening lines,

910
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:16,600
Speaker 1: this was Becca's chance to give her some balls. Well,

911
00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:18,360
Speaker 1: this is always next time. Thanks for a great podcast

912
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 1: to help me through the week.

913
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:24,720
Speaker 2: That's Jessica, one of the elder listeners. Okay, I actually

914
00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:26,560
Speaker 2: thought a lot about this because I was a little

915
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:29,879
Speaker 2: bit disappointed myself too. I felt like there was there

916
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:32,400
Speaker 2: were so many options for me to text on your phone,

917
00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:36,439
Speaker 2: but also I didn't know if it would I didn't

918
00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:38,239
Speaker 2: want to do any damage.

919
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 3: To like potential Yeah I'm not potential.

920
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:43,959
Speaker 2: Love, but just like I didn't want to do any

921
00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 2: like where you had to really climb yourself out of

922
00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:49,480
Speaker 2: an awkward hole or something. I was thinking of you

923
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:50,240
Speaker 2: in that sense.

924
00:42:50,280 --> 00:42:52,799
Speaker 3: It's so nice. Well, I feel like and.

925
00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:54,239
Speaker 2: I also found a lot of pressure because we were

926
00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:56,400
Speaker 2: doing it in the moment and I was like scrolling

927
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:57,319
Speaker 2: through your phone, I was like.

928
00:42:58,320 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 3: I know, and I have like Alison Schmidten there don't

929
00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 3: even know who that is, Alison.

930
00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 2: That's true.

931
00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 3: I have so many in my phone book that I

932
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:08,799
Speaker 3: don't even know half of them.

933
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 2: I feel like we should do another quiz and I'll

934
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:11,200
Speaker 2: do better.

935
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 1: Sorry for okay, So next week I'll come up with

936
00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:15,200
Speaker 1: another Gray's Anatomy quiz. Or are we going to do

937
00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:17,040
Speaker 1: a different quiz this time? Do you want this is Us?

938
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:18,640
Speaker 2: Yeah? This is Us quiz?

939
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:24,880
Speaker 3: Caught up, caught off, like, I'm not like as invested

940
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:26,800
Speaker 3: in that as I am a grades anatomy, you know

941
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:30,120
Speaker 3: what I mean? We were like, what's Randall's daughter's name?

942
00:43:30,360 --> 00:43:32,319
Speaker 3: Be like tests and one other I don't know the

943
00:43:32,320 --> 00:43:32,879
Speaker 3: other one's name.

944
00:43:34,080 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 1: By the way, how do you feel about the future Tests?

945
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:38,800
Speaker 1: That was cool?

946
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:41,359
Speaker 2: I loved that, and she went watching it back when

947
00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:44,360
Speaker 2: my sisters looked identical to like it was like, it

948
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 2: was crazy.

949
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:53,080
Speaker 1: That Super Bowl Sunday episode towards the end flash forward

950
00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 1: flash for our first flash forward on This is Us

951
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:57,760
Speaker 1: to Future Tests.

952
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 2: Remember she's getting she's so worker and she's getting the

953
00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:03,359
Speaker 2: little boy ready to go to the new family. And

954
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:04,280
Speaker 2: then old rand.

955
00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 1: Old Randall, Old great Randall.

956
00:44:06,920 --> 00:44:10,200
Speaker 3: I totally saw it, but totally missed that because I

957
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:11,719
Speaker 3: thought the episode was over, so I walked out of

958
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:13,120
Speaker 3: my room. But I saw that. I thought that they

959
00:44:13,160 --> 00:44:15,880
Speaker 3: were getting into a boy that oh that wasn't that.

960
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 1: That was all fake.

961
00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:20,480
Speaker 2: The last like thirty seconds of this is us are

962
00:44:20,520 --> 00:44:24,200
Speaker 2: always important. You don't walk out. Wow, I'm going to

963
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:26,399
Speaker 2: you probably missed so many and that was.

964
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:29,239
Speaker 1: Cool, And I haven't seen the most recent one. It's

965
00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 1: because I need some recovery time on Super Bowl Sunday.

966
00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:33,120
Speaker 3: Yeah a lot.

967
00:44:33,320 --> 00:44:36,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I was prepared for the Super Bowl Sunday,

968
00:44:36,280 --> 00:44:38,640
Speaker 2: like my I was like ready for the emotions. You know,

969
00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:41,759
Speaker 2: knew it was going to be sad. The next one

970
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 2: after that, for some reason, just really really got to me.

971
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:47,359
Speaker 1: And by the way, we should say that all this

972
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:49,120
Speaker 1: reaction to the therapist, we do have a life coach

973
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:50,359
Speaker 1: coming up today to talk to you about.

974
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:53,359
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, so we got the therapist. I don't really know,

975
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:56,040
Speaker 2: I mean, what was it. So we were talking about

976
00:44:56,080 --> 00:45:00,359
Speaker 2: it. It was like a psychiatrist focus on your path and

977
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:02,920
Speaker 2: what got you to the point of how you think now,

978
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:05,960
Speaker 2: and a life coach focuses on the future and how

979
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:11,319
Speaker 2: to kind of like work through those things to what

980
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:12,319
Speaker 2: your future goal is.

981
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:12,840
Speaker 3: Yeah.

982
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:15,920
Speaker 2: So we have Sharie Healy on the phone later on

983
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:18,319
Speaker 2: in the podcast, and she's gonna give me some more

984
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:23,960
Speaker 2: insight to my emotional problems when it comes to relationship.

985
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:26,720
Speaker 3: Or emotional stability. I beck I might be getting right.

986
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:32,279
Speaker 1: But before that, some of these emails some really tough

987
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 1: issues in these emails this week.

988
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:35,880
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'm ready, let's do it. I'm like kind

989
00:45:35,920 --> 00:45:38,160
Speaker 2: of tired of talking about my own issues, so let's

990
00:45:38,160 --> 00:45:38,920
Speaker 2: talk about others.

991
00:45:39,160 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 1: This is from anonymous. I normally don't talk about this,

992
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:43,319
Speaker 1: but you guys are so nice and open that I

993
00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:47,000
Speaker 1: feel comfortable sharing this with you. I'm twenty three and

994
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,759
Speaker 1: I've never kissed a guy. When I was thirteen, I

995
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:51,640
Speaker 1: had a kind of boyfriend who wanted to kiss him,

996
00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 1: but I never did because of being afraid to do

997
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 1: it the wrong way. Ten years later, still having to

998
00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: have my first kiss, and this prevents me from getting

999
00:45:58,560 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 1: to know guys because I'm too scared to kik kiss anyone,

1000
00:46:00,760 --> 00:46:01,920
Speaker 1: so I don't even go on dates.

1001
00:46:02,080 --> 00:46:03,319
Speaker 3: Right, She's like paralyzed.

1002
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:06,080
Speaker 1: Everyone says your first kiss is messy, awkward, and not good.

1003
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:09,200
Speaker 1: Hence my fear. Adolescence was the time to do this

1004
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:10,960
Speaker 1: and get out of my system and do it wrong.

1005
00:46:11,080 --> 00:46:13,080
Speaker 1: But I'm scared I'll suck at kissing for the first

1006
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:15,279
Speaker 1: time and I'll mess up any date. Is the first

1007
00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:17,320
Speaker 1: kiss that bad. I need you guys to help me

1008
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 1: get over this awful and stupid fear. I love you

1009
00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 1: so much and I'm so grateful this podcast exists.

1010
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:23,360
Speaker 2: I love this.

1011
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:25,880
Speaker 3: I did too. I feel bad for her.

1012
00:46:26,560 --> 00:46:29,080
Speaker 2: I feel bad for her because it's one of those

1013
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,600
Speaker 2: things that gets in her head. Yeah, I didn't. I

1014
00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:33,400
Speaker 2: was in my head and I was. I think I

1015
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 2: was sixteen when I had my first kiss, and I was.

1016
00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:40,120
Speaker 2: I remember felt like we kissed me like like French

1017
00:46:40,200 --> 00:46:42,600
Speaker 2: kids of this tongue, and I literally felt like I

1018
00:46:42,640 --> 00:46:44,959
Speaker 2: had just done the most dirty thing. When I walked

1019
00:46:44,960 --> 00:46:47,080
Speaker 2: into the house, I was like, I can't tell mom,

1020
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:50,799
Speaker 2: his tongue was in my mouth, but it I don't

1021
00:46:50,840 --> 00:46:53,239
Speaker 2: remember thinking that, Oh my god, it was terrible. Yeah,

1022
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 2: I liked my first kiss.

1023
00:46:54,560 --> 00:46:56,960
Speaker 3: I really don't think Anonymous, you can mess it up,

1024
00:46:57,280 --> 00:47:00,879
Speaker 3: like as long as you open your mouth, No, you don't.

1025
00:47:02,520 --> 00:47:09,440
Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell her, Hope, slightly put your tongue in

1026
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:18,839
Speaker 3: their mouth, just gently. It's a very gentle tongue. Can't

1027
00:47:18,880 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 3: go wrong with it, right.

1028
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:27,520
Speaker 2: Okay, First of all, I think first kiss, she doesn't.

1029
00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:29,839
Speaker 2: I think she just focuses on the lips and how

1030
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:32,160
Speaker 2: the lips move, and you don't try to do too

1031
00:47:32,239 --> 00:47:34,040
Speaker 2: much with the tongue. That's not too much.

1032
00:47:34,120 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 3: She's gently rubbing his tongue.

1033
00:47:38,800 --> 00:47:41,480
Speaker 2: Follow his lead, like the make the move.

1034
00:47:41,680 --> 00:47:43,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, whatever he's doing, do it back.

1035
00:47:44,560 --> 00:47:48,879
Speaker 2: Get that okay, Anonymous, listen to Mark. Follow his lead

1036
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:51,400
Speaker 2: because most of the time, I'm assuming any guy that

1037
00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:54,839
Speaker 2: you kiss has probably kissed someone before. So follow what

1038
00:47:54,880 --> 00:47:57,879
Speaker 2: he does because he's just leading it and you can

1039
00:47:57,960 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 2: kind of see what he if he doesn't engage.

1040
00:48:00,480 --> 00:48:02,720
Speaker 1: Give a little tongue back. It's a lot of tongue.

1041
00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 1: Whatever you're comfortable with.

1042
00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:07,960
Speaker 2: And here's the thing. If it's bad, it's like, oh,

1043
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:10,440
Speaker 2: well you did it and then and then the next

1044
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:11,200
Speaker 2: one will be better.

1045
00:48:11,719 --> 00:48:15,319
Speaker 3: And I'm almost thinking of maybe you'd kiss a guy friend, like.

1046
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:16,319
Speaker 2: But that's our first kid.

1047
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:19,320
Speaker 1: That's interesting though it's not a bad idea to practice it,

1048
00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:21,680
Speaker 1: just just because she's so hung up on this.

1049
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:22,759
Speaker 3: I thought about it.

1050
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,920
Speaker 2: That was my first suggestion, but then I was like,

1051
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 2: I think it's her first kiss. I don't know.

1052
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:32,279
Speaker 3: The first kiss was like drunk and didn't even remember it.

1053
00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:32,799
Speaker 3: So it's like.

1054
00:48:32,800 --> 00:48:35,279
Speaker 2: Mine was like in the driveway with the guy that

1055
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:39,000
Speaker 2: I really liked and snuck Tyler.

1056
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:42,120
Speaker 1: Tyler shout out.

1057
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:46,359
Speaker 3: Ryan Compton said, so you do remember I know he

1058
00:48:46,440 --> 00:48:46,880
Speaker 3: was drunk.

1059
00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:48,279
Speaker 2: Oh, he was drunk.

1060
00:48:48,440 --> 00:48:50,800
Speaker 1: We had him on the show to talk about It's

1061
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 1: so funny.

1062
00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:56,360
Speaker 2: Should I call Tyler y? Yeah?

1063
00:48:56,719 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, look at this, Anonymous, You've got a whole bit.

1064
00:49:00,160 --> 00:49:03,719
Speaker 2: We shouldn't do it now, we could try it. I mean,

1065
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:05,520
Speaker 2: it'd be interesting to talk to him and see if

1066
00:49:05,520 --> 00:49:09,400
Speaker 2: he ever remembers it. But yeah, I think you just

1067
00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 2: do it. I'm not opposed to the guy friend thing

1068
00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:15,480
Speaker 2: is she has someone that she's comfortable enough with, but

1069
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,800
Speaker 2: that not every girl just has like a super close

1070
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:18,920
Speaker 2: guy friend that she could be Like.

1071
00:49:18,880 --> 00:49:20,839
Speaker 1: I know, no, but it will help me get over

1072
00:49:20,840 --> 00:49:23,320
Speaker 1: this nervousness about it. And if that would help you, Anonymous,

1073
00:49:23,360 --> 00:49:26,040
Speaker 1: I say do that. If not, I don't. I personally

1074
00:49:26,040 --> 00:49:27,279
Speaker 1: think you shouldn't think about it so much.

1075
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:28,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think it. I feel like it's even

1076
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:30,600
Speaker 3: more of an awkward conversation with a guy friend.

1077
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 2: Like, hey, I'm saying, unless it's like her best friend, but.

1078
00:49:35,960 --> 00:49:38,040
Speaker 1: It's such a rom com. Isn't it like she has

1079
00:49:38,040 --> 00:49:38,480
Speaker 1: the friend?

1080
00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:45,200
Speaker 2: Okay, I love that idea, but if you don't have that.

1081
00:49:45,320 --> 00:49:48,480
Speaker 2: I think you go have a dinner's dinners. You have

1082
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 2: dinner and drink one of my I can't.

1083
00:49:51,200 --> 00:50:00,000
Speaker 3: Talk you go and have dinner and drinks. You giggles

1084
00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:01,200
Speaker 3: has gotten to his pan.

1085
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:05,479
Speaker 2: Let him take the lead and make the move. That's

1086
00:50:05,520 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 2: my advice.

1087
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:08,399
Speaker 1: All right, we try Tyler, I texted him.

1088
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:13,360
Speaker 2: Oh wait, oh wait, this is so intriguing.

1089
00:50:14,239 --> 00:50:14,960
Speaker 3: What did he say?

1090
00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:17,960
Speaker 2: He said what podcast? Which I'm a little bit of

1091
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:24,360
Speaker 2: scrubbing in. Uh while we're waiting, let's do another email.

1092
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:24,720
Speaker 1: Okay.

1093
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:27,480
Speaker 2: Oh. Also, I want to say anonymous thank you for

1094
00:50:27,520 --> 00:50:30,239
Speaker 2: trusting us and feeling comfortable with us.

1095
00:50:30,400 --> 00:50:33,560
Speaker 3: We literally have the best listeners, like actually cry this

1096
00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:35,080
Speaker 3: weekend reading some of these messages.

1097
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:37,560
Speaker 1: This one's brutal. This is Katie and she has a

1098
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:41,399
Speaker 1: really difficult decision. So after college, she moved a couple

1099
00:50:41,440 --> 00:50:43,359
Speaker 1: of hours away from her family and her boyfriend who

1100
00:50:43,400 --> 00:50:45,680
Speaker 1: is now her husband, for a job. She loves her job,

1101
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:48,040
Speaker 1: very close with her family, though she misses being near them.

1102
00:50:48,520 --> 00:50:50,960
Speaker 1: Some jobs have opened up near her family so she

1103
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:53,920
Speaker 1: could move back home, but she and her husband have

1104
00:50:53,960 --> 00:50:57,040
Speaker 1: been struggling with infertility and have been referred to a specialist.

1105
00:50:57,440 --> 00:51:01,480
Speaker 1: The insurance at her current job, would her fertility treatments.

1106
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:05,600
Speaker 1: The job in her hometown would not do I move

1107
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:09,319
Speaker 1: home and go into debt to have a child or

1108
00:51:09,360 --> 00:51:11,840
Speaker 1: miss out on my family memories and have a child

1109
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:13,760
Speaker 1: debt free. That is rough?

1110
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:14,720
Speaker 2: Okay, wait.

1111
00:51:16,080 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 3: Say it again.

1112
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:19,120
Speaker 1: This is a choice stay where she is and have

1113
00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:21,759
Speaker 1: insurance pay for her fertility treatments, but remains so far

1114
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:22,680
Speaker 1: away from her family.

1115
00:51:22,840 --> 00:51:23,719
Speaker 3: How many hours away?

1116
00:51:23,840 --> 00:51:29,359
Speaker 1: She said a couple of hours? Or does she move

1117
00:51:29,400 --> 00:51:32,520
Speaker 1: back home to that job. Fertility treatments would put her

1118
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:36,320
Speaker 1: in debt, but her family's around can help with anything.

1119
00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:41,040
Speaker 2: This is what I think. I think she stays has,

1120
00:51:42,520 --> 00:51:48,120
Speaker 2: stays at her current job, tries to get pregnant, and

1121
00:51:48,120 --> 00:51:52,000
Speaker 2: and gives it a certain amount of time. If she

1122
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:55,600
Speaker 2: gets pregnant, then she I feel like she should see

1123
00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:58,439
Speaker 2: if she can get pregnant with because how many can't

1124
00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 2: you do? Like it's like one or something and then

1125
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:05,280
Speaker 2: you have to wait a while and then you do another. Yeah, yeah,

1126
00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:06,480
Speaker 2: fertility treatment.

1127
00:52:06,520 --> 00:52:06,719
Speaker 1: I think.

1128
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:08,040
Speaker 3: So I don't know, I'm not.

1129
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:11,200
Speaker 2: Like you do one round. I wish we knew, Like

1130
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:13,239
Speaker 2: is the job offer not going to be? Like is

1131
00:52:13,280 --> 00:52:14,240
Speaker 2: it gone forever?

1132
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:16,880
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's like most job offers.

1133
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:18,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not like it's going to come back.

1134
00:52:18,560 --> 00:52:20,880
Speaker 1: You never know, I mean, something could open up again,

1135
00:52:20,960 --> 00:52:21,960
Speaker 1: but this is there now.

1136
00:52:22,440 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 3: My gut is telling me that she should be close

1137
00:52:24,719 --> 00:52:31,960
Speaker 3: to her family and that sometimes those things, you know

1138
00:52:31,960 --> 00:52:34,840
Speaker 3: what I mean, sometimes like these sticks and these doctors

1139
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 3: say that your chances are so low and you never know.

1140
00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:41,759
Speaker 1: You know, it's a tough one. I do like the

1141
00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:44,080
Speaker 1: idea of staying at the job until she gets pregnant

1142
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:47,239
Speaker 1: and then looking around at possibilities back home. Like in

1143
00:52:47,280 --> 00:52:49,000
Speaker 1: these situations, you always want to try to leave it

1144
00:52:49,080 --> 00:52:51,359
Speaker 1: up to the universe as much as you possibly can.

1145
00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:53,799
Speaker 1: And I'm not sure how to do that exactly, but

1146
00:52:53,880 --> 00:52:55,600
Speaker 1: maybe you just kind of stay the course for now

1147
00:52:55,680 --> 00:52:57,480
Speaker 1: until you get pregnant, and then you can see what

1148
00:52:57,560 --> 00:52:59,480
Speaker 1: opens up. Because if it's meant to be, it's meant

1149
00:52:59,480 --> 00:52:59,640
Speaker 1: to be.

1150
00:53:00,640 --> 00:53:03,239
Speaker 2: I mean, I I'm all like in my head, like

1151
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:06,320
Speaker 2: my first thing is thinking this would be one of

1152
00:53:06,360 --> 00:53:09,839
Speaker 2: those situations where I like really pray about it and say, like, ship,

1153
00:53:10,600 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 2: show me something that's right. It gives me an answer,

1154
00:53:14,080 --> 00:53:17,600
Speaker 2: because there's not really like a perfect answer here because obviously,

1155
00:53:17,600 --> 00:53:20,360
Speaker 2: if you're if you're with your family while you're struggling

1156
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:23,719
Speaker 2: through this. It's nice to have them around to like

1157
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:26,759
Speaker 2: be with you and support you through it. However, if

1158
00:53:26,760 --> 00:53:31,719
Speaker 2: you have the opportunity to have a company pay for it,

1159
00:53:31,719 --> 00:53:35,840
Speaker 2: it's but I have friends who struggled and got pregnant

1160
00:53:35,880 --> 00:53:39,880
Speaker 2: through fertility treatment, and then they got pregnant without that.

1161
00:53:40,160 --> 00:53:41,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, this does.

1162
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:43,680
Speaker 1: Moving home doesn't feel meant to be right now. I

1163
00:53:43,719 --> 00:53:45,320
Speaker 1: think it will feel meant to be in the future

1164
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:47,040
Speaker 1: when you have a baby and they can help you

1165
00:53:47,080 --> 00:53:49,000
Speaker 1: look after it. I don't think it's happening right now.

1166
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:50,239
Speaker 1: That's my gut on this.

1167
00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:56,160
Speaker 3: I mean this one. That's a tough one. All right.

1168
00:53:56,239 --> 00:53:59,799
Speaker 1: Let's move on to Alexia, who has been I don't

1169
00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:01,680
Speaker 1: know if with their boyfriend four and a half years now.

1170
00:54:01,800 --> 00:54:05,560
Speaker 1: They were each other's first, but not only because they've

1171
00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:06,360
Speaker 1: been not an off.

1172
00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:07,400
Speaker 3: Oh right, it okay.

1173
00:54:08,239 --> 00:54:10,560
Speaker 1: As the relationship has grown, they've become more serious about

1174
00:54:10,560 --> 00:54:12,520
Speaker 1: marriage on the horizon, so she's talked to him about

1175
00:54:12,560 --> 00:54:15,120
Speaker 1: not having sex until they're married, even though they've already

1176
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:18,200
Speaker 1: had sex. Sex before marriage has always been a big

1177
00:54:18,239 --> 00:54:20,000
Speaker 1: deal to me and something I've wanted to save, even

1178
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,080
Speaker 1: though we've obviously messed that up. I like the idea

1179
00:54:22,080 --> 00:54:23,799
Speaker 1: of honoring this practice for the time that we do

1180
00:54:23,920 --> 00:54:26,160
Speaker 1: have left. Whenever I bring it up, he goes along

1181
00:54:26,160 --> 00:54:28,480
Speaker 1: with it and says yeah, sure, and then does not

1182
00:54:28,520 --> 00:54:30,120
Speaker 1: honor that later, and then he gets hurt when I

1183
00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:32,560
Speaker 1: bring it up in the moment. So what are y'all's thoughts.

1184
00:54:32,640 --> 00:54:34,439
Speaker 1: Am I silly for wanting to do this so late?

1185
00:54:34,719 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 1: Should I let it go? How do I really get

1186
00:54:36,719 --> 00:54:38,640
Speaker 1: him on board? By the way, I'm from Texas. We're

1187
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 1: both twenty three. Love the podcast. Becca, you should definitely

1188
00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:42,960
Speaker 1: be the next Bachelorette.

1189
00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:46,080
Speaker 2: No no, no to that last part.

1190
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:47,719
Speaker 3: I mean I would love it.

1191
00:54:48,800 --> 00:54:54,319
Speaker 2: I this is I totally relate to this, Like we'll

1192
00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:59,040
Speaker 2: just like being with someone and you've already gone to

1193
00:54:59,120 --> 00:55:01,319
Speaker 2: that place and and you're like, well, I want to

1194
00:55:01,440 --> 00:55:03,680
Speaker 2: I want to wait, like I want to save myself,

1195
00:55:03,680 --> 00:55:05,600
Speaker 2: and it's like you've you've already feel like, all right,

1196
00:55:05,640 --> 00:55:08,040
Speaker 2: we already messed that up, like waiting, So what's the

1197
00:55:08,080 --> 00:55:11,160
Speaker 2: point now? But I think there is in like Tanya

1198
00:55:11,160 --> 00:55:14,640
Speaker 2: and I have talked about this, like wanting to make

1199
00:55:14,680 --> 00:55:17,080
Speaker 2: that decision and honor it and like really stick to

1200
00:55:17,120 --> 00:55:19,319
Speaker 2: it because you haven't up until this point, which is fine,

1201
00:55:19,360 --> 00:55:22,520
Speaker 2: And it's like if if you're okay with that, but

1202
00:55:22,600 --> 00:55:25,439
Speaker 2: if you if you in your heart like genuinely want

1203
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:29,560
Speaker 2: to wait, and he loves you and wants to honor you,

1204
00:55:29,600 --> 00:55:33,000
Speaker 2: then he should be willing to wait with you.

1205
00:55:33,280 --> 00:55:36,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that it does make it harder.

1206
00:55:36,320 --> 00:55:37,239
Speaker 2: When you've gone there, though.

1207
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:41,200
Speaker 1: Tany's got a good perspective because she's not a virgin

1208
00:55:42,000 --> 00:55:44,240
Speaker 1: and yet she wants to now save herself for marriage.

1209
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:45,040
Speaker 2: Correct.

1210
00:55:46,120 --> 00:55:49,319
Speaker 3: It's interesting because like it is a decision that I

1211
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 3: made for myself, you know what I mean, Like it's

1212
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,680
Speaker 3: something that I decided that I wanted to do, and

1213
00:55:56,200 --> 00:55:59,560
Speaker 3: but it is I also haven't gone to that point

1214
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 3: with any. But since I've made that decision, do you

1215
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:04,560
Speaker 3: know what I mean, Like, it hasn't gotten into Yeah,

1216
00:56:04,600 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 3: so right now it's I don't want to say it's

1217
00:56:07,280 --> 00:56:09,239
Speaker 3: come easy, but it's like a decision that I made

1218
00:56:09,239 --> 00:56:12,040
Speaker 3: and a decision that I want to honor. But I

1219
00:56:12,080 --> 00:56:15,319
Speaker 3: haven't been put into a compromising position. But I do

1220
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:17,520
Speaker 3: think that if it's something that's important to you, I

1221
00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:19,239
Speaker 3: think that you should talk to him about it. And

1222
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:21,239
Speaker 3: I don't think that you know what I mean the like, oh,

1223
00:56:21,280 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 3: well we've already. I think that you know. Everybody I

1224
00:56:25,160 --> 00:56:27,439
Speaker 3: don't want to say makes mistakes. It's not saying saying

1225
00:56:27,440 --> 00:56:29,640
Speaker 3: that you sleeping with him was a mistake, but if

1226
00:56:29,680 --> 00:56:33,160
Speaker 3: it's something that you really want to do, I don't

1227
00:56:33,200 --> 00:56:35,440
Speaker 3: think the fact that you have slept together should change that.

1228
00:56:35,520 --> 00:56:38,840
Speaker 3: I think you should wait until you get married and

1229
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:43,840
Speaker 3: honored that to yourself. I think there's a value in

1230
00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:49,080
Speaker 3: what's the word delayed gratification, and then maybe you guys can.

1231
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:56,120
Speaker 2: Get married soon, get married this month. I mean the

1232
00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:58,920
Speaker 2: fear of marriage, and Tyler says he is five to

1233
00:56:58,920 --> 00:57:14,840
Speaker 2: ten minutes. Okay, Colleen, Hey Tyler, I'm good. I was

1234
00:57:14,880 --> 00:57:17,800
Speaker 2: just calling. Well, we have Tanya on the line, we

1235
00:57:17,920 --> 00:57:24,480
Speaker 2: have Mark online, and we have online Tyler man. We

1236
00:57:24,520 --> 00:57:27,160
Speaker 2: are talking about We got an email from a listener

1237
00:57:27,920 --> 00:57:30,520
Speaker 2: and she has not had her first kiss yet. So

1238
00:57:30,520 --> 00:57:32,720
Speaker 2: we started. We got on the topic of first kisses

1239
00:57:33,080 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 2: and I didn't think that mine was that bad. She

1240
00:57:37,080 --> 00:57:40,960
Speaker 2: It has like a tip. People have a typical, you know,

1241
00:57:41,240 --> 00:57:44,560
Speaker 2: thought process of thinking the first kiss is awkward and messy.

1242
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:46,680
Speaker 2: But I wanted to get your if you even remember

1243
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:51,440
Speaker 2: what the first Yeah, what did you think.

1244
00:57:51,920 --> 00:57:53,320
Speaker 4: I want to hear about yours.

1245
00:57:53,320 --> 00:57:56,600
Speaker 2: First, Well, I thought, I remember we were out in

1246
00:57:56,640 --> 00:58:01,160
Speaker 2: my driveway. That's correct, saying standing by the car. I

1247
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:03,880
Speaker 2: used to sneak out to go see Tyler. It was

1248
00:58:03,920 --> 00:58:05,800
Speaker 2: like the most rebellious thing I ever did.

1249
00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:07,160
Speaker 3: Because your.

1250
00:58:08,920 --> 00:58:12,000
Speaker 2: My parents. But I don't know why they didn't like you,

1251
00:58:12,120 --> 00:58:13,120
Speaker 2: but they didn't.

1252
00:58:14,480 --> 00:58:16,800
Speaker 3: Wait, Tyler was Becca year first kiss as well.

1253
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:22,160
Speaker 4: No, No, it was it was you said that you

1254
00:58:22,240 --> 00:58:24,520
Speaker 4: thought it wasn't that bad, but you were definitely short

1255
00:58:24,560 --> 00:58:25,560
Speaker 4: and awkward about it.

1256
00:58:25,960 --> 00:58:28,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was. It scared me. I was like, oh

1257
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:31,760
Speaker 2: my gosh, it was. It was similar in the sense

1258
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:34,480
Speaker 2: that I built it up. You know, I think I

1259
00:58:34,560 --> 00:58:35,280
Speaker 2: was you.

1260
00:58:35,480 --> 00:58:36,560
Speaker 4: And then you ran away.

1261
00:58:37,160 --> 00:58:37,800
Speaker 2: Did I run?

1262
00:58:38,800 --> 00:58:40,200
Speaker 4: I mean it wasn't a run. It was kind of

1263
00:58:40,200 --> 00:58:42,560
Speaker 4: like a brisk walk inside.

1264
00:58:43,120 --> 00:58:43,960
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1265
00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:44,960
Speaker 1: How old were you.

1266
00:58:46,520 --> 00:58:47,160
Speaker 4: A good question.

1267
00:58:48,560 --> 00:58:52,040
Speaker 2: I think I was sixteen, but I may could have

1268
00:58:52,040 --> 00:58:53,720
Speaker 2: been fifty. No, I think I was sixteen.

1269
00:58:54,200 --> 00:58:56,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is a lot that.

1270
00:58:56,920 --> 00:58:58,840
Speaker 4: He had definitely built it up to be a big

1271
00:58:58,880 --> 00:59:01,640
Speaker 4: deal because I think got attended a few other times

1272
00:59:01,680 --> 00:59:07,640
Speaker 4: and you like turned your cheek, I think, and then

1273
00:59:07,720 --> 00:59:13,520
Speaker 4: once it happened, you like shortened shortened the experience by

1274
00:59:13,640 --> 00:59:18,000
Speaker 4: like doing the cheek turn again, and then you briskly

1275
00:59:18,480 --> 00:59:19,240
Speaker 4: walked inside.

1276
00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 2: I was selling them, I remember, because as soon as

1277
00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:28,640
Speaker 2: your tongue went in my mouth, I was like, I

1278
00:59:28,680 --> 00:59:32,360
Speaker 2: feel like I just did something really bad.

1279
00:59:31,960 --> 00:59:34,560
Speaker 4: I'm glad we're talking about times and now.

1280
00:59:38,200 --> 00:59:40,880
Speaker 2: Just really wanted to get the details of this.

1281
00:59:41,760 --> 00:59:42,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, for sure.

1282
00:59:42,920 --> 00:59:45,920
Speaker 2: So it was great for you, is what you're saying.

1283
00:59:46,200 --> 00:59:48,040
Speaker 3: Basically, you're saying it was a tent out of ten.

1284
00:59:49,400 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 4: I thought I heared Becca. I thought that she didn't

1285
00:59:52,040 --> 00:59:52,480
Speaker 4: enjoy it.

1286
00:59:53,520 --> 00:59:56,040
Speaker 3: I do have to say, though, this conversation was really enlightening.

1287
00:59:56,040 --> 00:59:58,439
Speaker 3: The fact that you kissed him and ran away.

1288
00:59:58,520 --> 01:00:03,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, a story of my life. Yeah yeah? Yeah?

1289
01:00:03,520 --> 01:00:07,240
Speaker 1: Did this lead to more kissing between the two of you?

1290
01:00:07,240 --> 01:00:07,800
Speaker 3: Your face?

1291
01:00:09,320 --> 01:00:11,919
Speaker 4: The fun? Not a lot?

1292
01:00:12,320 --> 01:00:13,720
Speaker 1: Not a lot, not a lot.

1293
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:16,240
Speaker 4: So maybe she didn't like it.

1294
01:00:17,720 --> 01:00:22,920
Speaker 1: You don't remember make out sessions with tylers.

1295
01:00:24,240 --> 01:00:28,160
Speaker 2: But yeah, well Tyler, thank you for now. I now

1296
01:00:28,240 --> 01:00:32,000
Speaker 2: I feel like we have more insight into who I

1297
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:34,320
Speaker 2: am as a person. So it just all like brings

1298
01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:35,880
Speaker 2: things all back around full circle.

1299
01:00:36,000 --> 01:00:37,080
Speaker 4: So awesome.

1300
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:38,640
Speaker 1: I help.

1301
01:00:38,840 --> 01:00:41,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you for for taking time to rehash with

1302
01:00:41,720 --> 01:00:42,920
Speaker 2: me with us.

1303
01:00:44,440 --> 01:00:50,680
Speaker 1: If y'all need anything else, He remembers a lot of

1304
01:00:50,680 --> 01:00:52,480
Speaker 1: detail for it not being his first kiss.

1305
01:00:52,800 --> 01:00:54,680
Speaker 3: I remember a lot of you love kissed.

1306
01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:57,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I remember most of my first kisses.

1307
01:00:57,760 --> 01:00:58,400
Speaker 3: You only had one.

1308
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:01,240
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I remember a lot. Oh, my first kiss

1309
01:01:01,280 --> 01:01:03,240
Speaker 2: is with guys, you know, at the first kiss with

1310
01:01:03,280 --> 01:01:03,680
Speaker 2: each guy.

1311
01:01:04,040 --> 01:01:06,200
Speaker 3: But I did say I am glad that we called

1312
01:01:06,280 --> 01:01:11,360
Speaker 3: Tyler because I think we really like got a little

1313
01:01:11,680 --> 01:01:12,680
Speaker 3: insight into this is.

1314
01:01:13,040 --> 01:01:16,720
Speaker 2: But let me tell you about I was scared because

1315
01:01:16,960 --> 01:01:19,440
Speaker 2: my parents didn't really like me hanging out with him.

1316
01:01:19,520 --> 01:01:21,919
Speaker 2: And I really don't know it was. I don't really

1317
01:01:21,920 --> 01:01:22,360
Speaker 2: know why.

1318
01:01:22,440 --> 01:01:25,320
Speaker 3: Her who knows he could have like not made the

1319
01:01:25,320 --> 01:01:25,960
Speaker 3: basketball team.

1320
01:01:26,440 --> 01:01:28,400
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't think that was a problem.

1321
01:01:28,440 --> 01:01:31,600
Speaker 1: But that's sweet that it's sixteen. Your first kiss was

1322
01:01:31,640 --> 01:01:33,240
Speaker 1: such a big deal too. I think that's sweet because

1323
01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:35,480
Speaker 1: so many sixteen year olds are doing so much more

1324
01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:35,800
Speaker 1: than that.

1325
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:38,000
Speaker 2: I know, like it was very special to me. And

1326
01:01:38,040 --> 01:01:40,080
Speaker 2: that's why with this girl, even though she's twenty three

1327
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:42,240
Speaker 2: and like it's like just like you said, paralyze in

1328
01:01:42,280 --> 01:01:46,120
Speaker 2: her head about it, I think that it is special still,

1329
01:01:46,160 --> 01:01:48,800
Speaker 2: Like it's a first kiss and it should be something

1330
01:01:48,840 --> 01:01:52,440
Speaker 2: that she remembers and like has whether it's awkward and

1331
01:01:52,560 --> 01:01:55,200
Speaker 2: terrible or like the best thing of her life. It

1332
01:01:55,240 --> 01:01:58,160
Speaker 2: should be like a moment, you.

1333
01:01:58,120 --> 01:02:00,720
Speaker 3: Know, I know, I mean, how old people now in

1334
01:02:00,800 --> 01:02:02,840
Speaker 3: that seven?

1335
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:05,040
Speaker 1: Well, actually, I have heard that it's going in the

1336
01:02:05,080 --> 01:02:08,720
Speaker 1: other direction. Somewhat. It's not totally going in the other direction,

1337
01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:12,920
Speaker 1: but I've heard that that less kids are experimenting sexually

1338
01:02:13,040 --> 01:02:15,919
Speaker 1: than they used to be. There's less teen sex least

1339
01:02:15,920 --> 01:02:18,360
Speaker 1: teen pregnancies than before for whatever reason.

1340
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:19,360
Speaker 3: Oh that's good news.

1341
01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:20,280
Speaker 1: I think that is good news.

1342
01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:25,040
Speaker 2: Yeah. I remember in sixth grade when I this guy

1343
01:02:25,240 --> 01:02:27,600
Speaker 2: asked me, how do we already talk about this? About this?

1344
01:02:27,680 --> 01:02:29,600
Speaker 2: How far I would go? And I didn't know there

1345
01:02:29,640 --> 01:02:32,760
Speaker 2: was in between, like sex and kissing, and so I

1346
01:02:32,800 --> 01:02:36,360
Speaker 2: said everything, But I think I said something everything but

1347
01:02:36,520 --> 01:02:39,160
Speaker 2: the bed, Like that's what that was my response. So

1348
01:02:39,280 --> 01:02:41,280
Speaker 2: there it was like this whole thing that I was

1349
01:02:41,400 --> 01:02:45,600
Speaker 2: just like, down to do it all. I'm like, oh,

1350
01:02:46,160 --> 01:02:49,160
Speaker 2: I would just meant kissing, right, that's all I meant

1351
01:02:50,520 --> 01:02:51,760
Speaker 2: bolding hands kissing.

1352
01:02:52,640 --> 01:02:55,360
Speaker 1: Maybe here it is Today's youth, asies thirteen to nineteen,

1353
01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:58,240
Speaker 1: compared to those in previous decades, are less likely to

1354
01:02:58,280 --> 01:03:03,360
Speaker 1: engage in adult activities, including alcohol, dating, sex, driving a car,

1355
01:03:03,440 --> 01:03:05,720
Speaker 1: and getting a job.

1356
01:03:06,120 --> 01:03:10,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, not the job thing, right, But.

1357
01:03:10,160 --> 01:03:11,920
Speaker 1: It's all I think it's all part of the delayed

1358
01:03:11,960 --> 01:03:14,960
Speaker 1: development of millennials. These days, they're living with their parents longer,

1359
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:17,080
Speaker 1: they're putting off jobs longer, they don't care about getting

1360
01:03:17,080 --> 01:03:20,160
Speaker 1: a car at sixteen because they're getting rides everywhere. All

1361
01:03:20,160 --> 01:03:23,040
Speaker 1: part of that delayed development is factored.

1362
01:03:22,680 --> 01:03:28,360
Speaker 2: Into this great interesting Well. Part of me getting my

1363
01:03:29,720 --> 01:03:33,640
Speaker 2: mojo back is kind of getting fit.

1364
01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:35,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, I wanted to fit.

1365
01:03:35,680 --> 01:03:37,600
Speaker 2: I've wanted to get fit for a long time. It's

1366
01:03:37,640 --> 01:03:40,520
Speaker 2: just actually doing it leaving my house to do it.

1367
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:43,720
Speaker 2: But with Beach Body workouts, you don't have to leave

1368
01:03:43,760 --> 01:03:47,360
Speaker 2: the house. Beach Body is an online fitness streaming service

1369
01:03:47,400 --> 01:03:49,760
Speaker 2: that gives you unlimited access to a wide variety of

1370
01:03:49,840 --> 01:03:53,640
Speaker 2: highly effective, world class workouts, personalized to meet your needs.

1371
01:03:53,640 --> 01:03:55,880
Speaker 3: So that's why I think it's so awesome, because like

1372
01:03:55,920 --> 01:03:58,560
Speaker 3: some days, like and I like to work out, but

1373
01:03:58,680 --> 01:04:00,440
Speaker 3: some days, you know, you want to have like a

1374
01:04:00,440 --> 01:04:02,920
Speaker 3: little bit lesser of a workout. You don't want to

1375
01:04:02,960 --> 01:04:05,400
Speaker 3: go out a ten And you can pick like yoga

1376
01:04:05,600 --> 01:04:08,480
Speaker 3: or weight training or like, there's like different types of

1377
01:04:08,560 --> 01:04:11,880
Speaker 3: workouts that you can choose from. So it's actually really nice.

1378
01:04:11,960 --> 01:04:14,120
Speaker 2: I know, it's really nice, and you can kind of

1379
01:04:14,200 --> 01:04:16,600
Speaker 2: choose if you don't want to focus on your abs,

1380
01:04:16,600 --> 01:04:18,880
Speaker 2: you can do just your legs or just your arms.

1381
01:04:19,680 --> 01:04:24,200
Speaker 2: And also it includes extensive nutritional content, so that's all

1382
01:04:24,240 --> 01:04:26,640
Speaker 2: of it's proven to help you. People achieve their health

1383
01:04:26,640 --> 01:04:29,880
Speaker 2: and health and fitness goals, which I struggle with both

1384
01:04:29,920 --> 01:04:30,960
Speaker 2: fitness and health.

1385
01:04:31,760 --> 01:04:34,280
Speaker 3: Say that the abs are made in the kitchen.

1386
01:04:34,920 --> 01:04:38,640
Speaker 2: Yeah. I always get a little like stressed out when

1387
01:04:38,680 --> 01:04:41,480
Speaker 2: people say it's more about how you eat rather than

1388
01:04:41,480 --> 01:04:47,400
Speaker 2: how much you work out, because yikes, But this is convenience. Yeah,

1389
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:50,440
Speaker 2: because we got to talk about that in a second.

1390
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:55,040
Speaker 2: But beach Body has it all so you can kind

1391
01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:57,360
Speaker 2: of follow their guides and kind of choose what you

1392
01:04:57,400 --> 01:04:59,880
Speaker 2: want to focus on, and it's all right there. On demand.

1393
01:05:00,120 --> 01:05:03,280
Speaker 3: Yeah. The keyword is on demand because convenience.

1394
01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:06,360
Speaker 2: It's accessible on your computer or any device. You don't

1395
01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:08,360
Speaker 2: have to go to a gym or schedule class, and

1396
01:05:08,520 --> 01:05:11,760
Speaker 2: your annual subscription is cheaper than a gym membership like

1397
01:05:11,760 --> 01:05:15,160
Speaker 2: the one I'm still paying. Beach Body on Demand has

1398
01:05:15,200 --> 01:05:18,960
Speaker 2: programs for any fitness level. There are over six hundred different.

1399
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:20,000
Speaker 3: Workouts ranging amazing.

1400
01:05:20,120 --> 01:05:23,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, six hundred different workouts, Yeah, ranging from cardio to

1401
01:05:23,560 --> 01:05:26,800
Speaker 2: weight training, yoga, low impact, and dance. If you really

1402
01:05:26,800 --> 01:05:30,360
Speaker 2: want to get down, you actually need to give the

1403
01:05:30,400 --> 01:05:33,680
Speaker 2: service a try. It's so fun, it's easy, it's it's

1404
01:05:33,920 --> 01:05:36,160
Speaker 2: ideal for anyone who doesn't like to go to the

1405
01:05:36,200 --> 01:05:37,200
Speaker 2: gym or leave the house.

1406
01:05:37,400 --> 01:05:40,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it is like it's a big step, you know,

1407
01:05:40,240 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 3: like you're investing in yourself. Yeah, why wouldn't you?

1408
01:05:43,360 --> 01:05:47,200
Speaker 2: Very important? Right now, you can get a free trial membership.

1409
01:05:47,240 --> 01:05:50,560
Speaker 2: When you text Beca to thirty thirty thirty, you will

1410
01:05:50,560 --> 01:05:54,000
Speaker 2: get full access to this entire platform for free, all

1411
01:05:54,040 --> 01:05:57,440
Speaker 2: the workouts and nutrition information for free. So all you

1412
01:05:57,440 --> 01:06:01,400
Speaker 2: have to do is text Beca to thirty thirty and

1413
01:06:01,400 --> 01:06:02,880
Speaker 2: that's beach Body on demand.

1414
01:06:02,920 --> 01:06:04,680
Speaker 1: So I'm sorry if you what should you text to

1415
01:06:04,760 --> 01:06:05,680
Speaker 1: thirty thirty thirty?

1416
01:06:06,120 --> 01:06:09,720
Speaker 2: Beck up? Thank you Mark. I was panicking trying to

1417
01:06:09,720 --> 01:06:11,120
Speaker 2: figure out how we could do.

1418
01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:13,280
Speaker 3: So I did, I mean panic saw with thirty thirty

1419
01:06:13,280 --> 01:06:14,880
Speaker 3: and then beat back. I was like, oh I can't damn,

1420
01:06:14,880 --> 01:06:15,560
Speaker 3: I gonna do it.

1421
01:06:16,640 --> 01:06:19,840
Speaker 2: Okay, So last week we had a psychiatrist on to

1422
01:06:19,920 --> 01:06:24,360
Speaker 2: analyze me my emotional state with relationships, and we had

1423
01:06:24,400 --> 01:06:27,800
Speaker 2: a breakthrough we did have a breakthrough, and now this

1424
01:06:27,840 --> 01:06:32,000
Speaker 2: week we have Sharie Healy, who is a life coach,

1425
01:06:32,600 --> 01:06:35,320
Speaker 2: and I would like to know the difference because I'm

1426
01:06:35,720 --> 01:06:37,919
Speaker 2: I can get all the i'd like I can. I'll

1427
01:06:37,920 --> 01:06:39,040
Speaker 2: take all the help I can get.

1428
01:06:39,160 --> 01:06:39,600
Speaker 3: That's sure.

1429
01:06:40,680 --> 01:06:43,919
Speaker 2: Sure, We're so happy to have you. How are you?

1430
01:06:44,960 --> 01:06:47,360
Speaker 5: I'm so good it's crazy to be here things.

1431
01:06:47,600 --> 01:06:51,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. So I'm just like a slightly emotionally distant person

1432
01:06:51,800 --> 01:06:55,160
Speaker 2: and need any advice that I can get.

1433
01:06:55,320 --> 01:06:57,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, to break Well, let's set the O R room

1434
01:06:57,440 --> 01:07:00,400
Speaker 3: up for her. Wow, so let's really break it down

1435
01:07:00,440 --> 01:07:04,800
Speaker 3: for her. What is it like? You know, set the scene?

1436
01:07:05,160 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 2: I'm setting it. Yeah, Okay, So I tend to have

1437
01:07:09,640 --> 01:07:13,400
Speaker 2: invisible emotional walls up, but I haven't been able to

1438
01:07:13,480 --> 01:07:17,440
Speaker 2: quite figure out where they come from or or what's

1439
01:07:17,560 --> 01:07:21,680
Speaker 2: caused them. We kind of discussed with a psychiatrist last

1440
01:07:21,680 --> 01:07:25,640
Speaker 2: week that I am nervous.

1441
01:07:25,680 --> 01:07:26,480
Speaker 3: You're going nervous, duck.

1442
01:07:26,560 --> 01:07:29,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm nervous of getting stuck in a relationship, like

1443
01:07:29,320 --> 01:07:32,440
Speaker 2: if I choose to get married and commit to forever.

1444
01:07:32,600 --> 01:07:34,840
Speaker 2: I'm scared of what happens down the line if we

1445
01:07:35,040 --> 01:07:37,320
Speaker 2: get to a place where I feel stuck.

1446
01:07:37,840 --> 01:07:41,760
Speaker 5: Right right, Okay, well, let's break this down the difference

1447
01:07:41,800 --> 01:07:44,840
Speaker 5: between the psychiatrist and like what I do. There are

1448
01:07:44,840 --> 01:07:48,040
Speaker 5: lots of different flavors of life coaches, but I would

1449
01:07:48,080 --> 01:07:51,880
Speaker 5: say the probably simplest difference is that I'm really looking

1450
01:07:51,920 --> 01:07:55,960
Speaker 5: at moving forward. You know, sometimes in psychiatry psychology, we

1451
01:07:56,000 --> 01:07:58,040
Speaker 5: look at what got you to where you are today.

1452
01:07:58,320 --> 01:08:01,160
Speaker 5: We look at the past where I'm like, you're at

1453
01:08:01,200 --> 01:08:03,400
Speaker 5: point A. You want to get to point B. You

1454
01:08:03,480 --> 01:08:06,920
Speaker 5: probably want to be in love or free in a relationship,

1455
01:08:07,120 --> 01:08:09,480
Speaker 5: not having this fear of being stuck anymore, and so

1456
01:08:09,560 --> 01:08:12,240
Speaker 5: we look at how do we get you there? And

1457
01:08:12,360 --> 01:08:15,400
Speaker 5: I call myself, like, another term for life coach in

1458
01:08:15,400 --> 01:08:18,639
Speaker 5: my mind is possibilitarian. That's what I call myself because

1459
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:22,240
Speaker 5: I'm really obsessed with I'm locking all the possibilities for

1460
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:24,679
Speaker 5: you right. There are all kinds of ways we could

1461
01:08:24,720 --> 01:08:27,280
Speaker 5: figure this out. So that's really what I'm good at.

1462
01:08:28,120 --> 01:08:31,679
Speaker 3: Good I'm like I said, I like that, Yeah, it's great.

1463
01:08:31,720 --> 01:08:36,280
Speaker 5: It just feels like you have these fears, are these

1464
01:08:36,479 --> 01:08:39,360
Speaker 5: sort of invisible walls for very good reason. I believe

1465
01:08:39,400 --> 01:08:41,840
Speaker 5: there's always the great reason, right, and we could do

1466
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:43,840
Speaker 5: all kinds of digging to figure out why they're there,

1467
01:08:43,960 --> 01:08:47,120
Speaker 5: or we could just sort of look at I have

1468
01:08:47,200 --> 01:08:50,280
Speaker 5: a couple other questions for you, like, what what do

1469
01:08:50,320 --> 01:08:54,400
Speaker 5: you think relationship means to you? What is it equal?

1470
01:08:54,680 --> 01:08:57,160
Speaker 5: If you get into a relationship, does that equal I'm

1471
01:08:57,200 --> 01:08:58,479
Speaker 5: eventually going to be stuck?

1472
01:09:00,160 --> 01:09:03,320
Speaker 2: Actually, maybe a little not. I think maybe the thought

1473
01:09:03,520 --> 01:09:07,479
Speaker 2: that comes is that initial what happens if I get stuck?

1474
01:09:07,880 --> 01:09:11,080
Speaker 2: But I also think I think I think my thing

1475
01:09:11,240 --> 01:09:15,000
Speaker 2: is when I think of a good relationship as both

1476
01:09:15,040 --> 01:09:19,240
Speaker 2: parties being happy and willing to compromise and in a

1477
01:09:20,360 --> 01:09:22,800
Speaker 2: like good communication, that's kind of what I think of

1478
01:09:23,080 --> 01:09:26,439
Speaker 2: and just adding happiness to each other. Because I'm pretty

1479
01:09:26,439 --> 01:09:28,960
Speaker 2: content and happy on my own, So I've never thought

1480
01:09:28,960 --> 01:09:32,759
Speaker 2: of a relationship as someone to complete me. I've always

1481
01:09:32,760 --> 01:09:35,559
Speaker 2: thought of it as someone to add to me. And

1482
01:09:35,680 --> 01:09:39,960
Speaker 2: so if a relationship causes more stress and anxiety of

1483
01:09:40,040 --> 01:09:44,160
Speaker 2: feeling stuck, then in my head, I'm like, that's not adding.

1484
01:09:43,840 --> 01:09:47,040
Speaker 5: To me, right exactly, And I think that's a great

1485
01:09:47,160 --> 01:09:50,160
Speaker 5: measure it to be that this is life enhancing right right.

1486
01:09:50,200 --> 01:09:52,400
Speaker 5: It brings something to each other that we couldn't get

1487
01:09:52,439 --> 01:09:55,680
Speaker 5: on our own. Otherwise we'd all be single, right, right,

1488
01:09:55,720 --> 01:09:59,200
Speaker 5: So what's the ultimate goal of relationship. Then the ultimate

1489
01:09:59,280 --> 01:10:03,280
Speaker 5: goal is to be able to give each other happiness.

1490
01:10:02,800 --> 01:10:04,040
Speaker 2: Right to have a companion.

1491
01:10:05,080 --> 01:10:08,519
Speaker 5: Yeah, and if you had this idea that, oh my god,

1492
01:10:08,560 --> 01:10:11,719
Speaker 5: what if I get stuck? Though, I'd answer that question

1493
01:10:11,880 --> 01:10:14,320
Speaker 5: what would I do if I get stuck? Let's stare

1494
01:10:14,360 --> 01:10:15,920
Speaker 5: that straight in the face and be like, if that's

1495
01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:18,600
Speaker 5: the worst case scenario and you got married and you

1496
01:10:18,640 --> 01:10:21,760
Speaker 5: felt like, oh my god, I am now stuck, what

1497
01:10:21,840 --> 01:10:22,360
Speaker 5: would you do?

1498
01:10:24,439 --> 01:10:26,639
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think that's that's where I struggle

1499
01:10:26,720 --> 01:10:29,920
Speaker 2: because part of me. If I'm committing to forever with

1500
01:10:29,960 --> 01:10:32,880
Speaker 2: someone and that's what I choose when I marry them,

1501
01:10:33,240 --> 01:10:33,559
Speaker 2: then I.

1502
01:10:33,479 --> 01:10:35,879
Speaker 3: Would hope that I would work through.

1503
01:10:35,680 --> 01:10:39,439
Speaker 2: That feeling of being stuck and figure out why I

1504
01:10:39,479 --> 01:10:40,200
Speaker 2: feel that way.

1505
01:10:41,200 --> 01:10:44,920
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's what you commit to. Then you don't commit to,

1506
01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:48,800
Speaker 5: Like I think the idea forever just right, there is

1507
01:10:48,840 --> 01:10:51,600
Speaker 5: a whole lot of pressure and it's a it's a

1508
01:10:51,600 --> 01:10:53,840
Speaker 5: blueprint that we all have, Like, we all have this

1509
01:10:54,000 --> 01:10:58,000
Speaker 5: idea of forever. It's what our culture says we should do.

1510
01:10:58,760 --> 01:11:01,200
Speaker 5: But maybe if you love that all right, well, I

1511
01:11:01,280 --> 01:11:04,799
Speaker 5: will just become the girl who learns all the ways

1512
01:11:05,320 --> 01:11:09,000
Speaker 5: to have great communication I'll learn all the ways to

1513
01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:13,080
Speaker 5: bring happiness in relationship. I'll learn about this guy and

1514
01:11:13,080 --> 01:11:17,000
Speaker 5: what he uniquely needs, and I'll do all those things.

1515
01:11:17,040 --> 01:11:19,200
Speaker 5: Like there's just a skill gap that a lot of

1516
01:11:19,280 --> 01:11:21,799
Speaker 5: us have, right because we didn't learn this stuff in school,

1517
01:11:21,920 --> 01:11:24,960
Speaker 5: Like I would be really so much better off as

1518
01:11:25,000 --> 01:11:27,200
Speaker 5: I think most of us would have. It's like right

1519
01:11:27,240 --> 01:11:33,439
Speaker 5: alongside calculus, like life skills, you know, and communication one

1520
01:11:33,479 --> 01:11:36,800
Speaker 5: on one and things like this. So we just as

1521
01:11:36,840 --> 01:11:40,400
Speaker 5: adults get to go out and find teachers and people

1522
01:11:40,479 --> 01:11:45,639
Speaker 5: who've learned these things and know that whatever block you hit,

1523
01:11:45,800 --> 01:11:48,040
Speaker 5: whatever wall you come across, you'll find a way to

1524
01:11:48,080 --> 01:11:49,000
Speaker 5: take it down.

1525
01:11:49,000 --> 01:11:52,360
Speaker 2: If you love that guy, Right, I think that's kind

1526
01:11:52,400 --> 01:11:55,360
Speaker 2: of what the well and the conclusion in my head

1527
01:11:55,520 --> 01:11:58,680
Speaker 2: is maybe it's not so much about I mean, I

1528
01:11:58,720 --> 01:12:01,479
Speaker 2: think there are definitely and things that I need to

1529
01:12:01,520 --> 01:12:04,320
Speaker 2: work on as an individual on how I think of relationships,

1530
01:12:04,320 --> 01:12:06,800
Speaker 2: but also could be as simple as I haven't met

1531
01:12:06,840 --> 01:12:09,680
Speaker 2: the right person that I'm ready to.

1532
01:12:11,200 --> 01:12:15,160
Speaker 5: Make that commitment to amen, because I've heard a couple

1533
01:12:15,200 --> 01:12:18,679
Speaker 5: of the other podcasts and I know about is it Robert,

1534
01:12:18,880 --> 01:12:19,360
Speaker 5: is that the one?

1535
01:12:19,439 --> 01:12:21,479
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, you're kind.

1536
01:12:21,280 --> 01:12:24,040
Speaker 5: Of missing for a while, right, Yeah, I think that

1537
01:12:24,439 --> 01:12:28,120
Speaker 5: he he would have had that impact on you, that

1538
01:12:28,200 --> 01:12:31,519
Speaker 5: effect that I call like resonance, right, when somebody comes

1539
01:12:31,520 --> 01:12:35,559
Speaker 5: in and they literally amplify you. They make you like

1540
01:12:36,120 --> 01:12:41,280
Speaker 5: a greater, happier, you know, more relaxed version of yourself.

1541
01:12:42,439 --> 01:12:45,479
Speaker 5: And then in that way, you do anything for each other,

1542
01:12:45,640 --> 01:12:47,760
Speaker 5: you know, and it would be simple, like you just

1543
01:12:47,800 --> 01:12:50,920
Speaker 5: see certain blends, right, certain couples come together and it's

1544
01:12:51,000 --> 01:12:55,320
Speaker 5: just like wow, so natural, and others have to work

1545
01:12:55,560 --> 01:12:59,920
Speaker 5: so hard. And I think that when that guy will

1546
01:13:00,240 --> 01:13:03,320
Speaker 5: is into your life, a lot of those fears are

1547
01:13:03,320 --> 01:13:06,639
Speaker 5: going to go away, right, a lot of the walls

1548
01:13:06,840 --> 01:13:10,160
Speaker 5: because there's a protection app right. Some people make us

1549
01:13:10,160 --> 01:13:12,920
Speaker 5: feel like we need to go into protect mode. And

1550
01:13:13,520 --> 01:13:17,200
Speaker 5: the right guy is I mean, it may not be instantaneous,

1551
01:13:17,240 --> 01:13:20,000
Speaker 5: but when he learns you, there are ways in which

1552
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:24,360
Speaker 5: you'll just relax. Yeah, And right now, I feel like

1553
01:13:24,400 --> 01:13:28,320
Speaker 5: you have this need for comfort and certainty. Right, You

1554
01:13:28,400 --> 01:13:31,040
Speaker 5: love being home a lot, You love your life, Like

1555
01:13:31,080 --> 01:13:34,760
Speaker 5: you've said, you have this dating apathy, right because your

1556
01:13:34,800 --> 01:13:37,599
Speaker 5: life's already so great, right, and you've got it kind

1557
01:13:37,640 --> 01:13:41,120
Speaker 5: of dialed. So the only way to shift out of

1558
01:13:41,160 --> 01:13:43,439
Speaker 5: that is if somebody came into your life that may,

1559
01:13:43,760 --> 01:13:48,160
Speaker 5: like say, love or fun and excitement sort of more

1560
01:13:48,240 --> 01:13:53,680
Speaker 5: important than the comfort and the vibe that you're already in.

1561
01:13:54,720 --> 01:13:57,600
Speaker 2: Yeah. I agree with that, and that's why everyone. You know,

1562
01:13:57,680 --> 01:14:01,280
Speaker 2: there's the positive side of the way my personality works

1563
01:14:01,320 --> 01:14:04,680
Speaker 2: is that when someone does come that affects me differently,

1564
01:14:04,720 --> 01:14:08,640
Speaker 2: it'll be very noticeable. Rather than if I was just

1565
01:14:08,680 --> 01:14:11,080
Speaker 2: excited about everyone.

1566
01:14:12,479 --> 01:14:14,519
Speaker 5: I think, yeah, then all of a sudden, you'd be like,

1567
01:14:14,720 --> 01:14:17,559
Speaker 5: off the couch, let's go, you know, if you get

1568
01:14:17,880 --> 01:14:20,559
Speaker 5: your couch and would blend right into your life.

1569
01:14:20,720 --> 01:14:23,160
Speaker 3: You know, Well, that's where I think the problem were.

1570
01:14:23,560 --> 01:14:25,200
Speaker 2: What do you think the problem, Tanya, What do you

1571
01:14:25,200 --> 01:14:25,960
Speaker 2: think the problem is?

1572
01:14:26,120 --> 01:14:29,040
Speaker 3: I think that was the issue, but it wasn't so

1573
01:14:29,160 --> 01:14:31,920
Speaker 3: much that. I don't think you're ever gonna truly, I

1574
01:14:31,960 --> 01:14:34,600
Speaker 3: don't think you're ever going to be like googooglega, like

1575
01:14:34,640 --> 01:14:36,240
Speaker 3: I'm obsessed with the person I want to spend every

1576
01:14:36,240 --> 01:14:38,200
Speaker 3: second with them. I think you need somebody that's going

1577
01:14:38,280 --> 01:14:40,519
Speaker 3: to balance you out. And I think that the two

1578
01:14:40,560 --> 01:14:42,519
Speaker 3: of you just didn't see eye to eye on things

1579
01:14:42,560 --> 01:14:45,960
Speaker 3: like that, if that makes sense, you know what I mean? Yeah,

1580
01:14:46,000 --> 01:14:47,760
Speaker 3: Like he wanted you to be one way and you

1581
01:14:47,800 --> 01:14:49,679
Speaker 3: wanted it to be another way, and you neither neither

1582
01:14:49,760 --> 01:14:52,519
Speaker 3: one of you were willing to compromise.

1583
01:14:52,880 --> 01:14:55,960
Speaker 2: Right, Like it neither neither one of us was wrong.

1584
01:14:55,920 --> 01:14:58,160
Speaker 3: Correct, because you both wanted what you want.

1585
01:14:59,000 --> 01:15:01,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like, we both had desires what we wanted a

1586
01:15:01,360 --> 01:15:04,519
Speaker 2: relationship and they just didn't match up, matchup totally.

1587
01:15:05,280 --> 01:15:07,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, And you know what would be like the most loving,

1588
01:15:07,120 --> 01:15:09,240
Speaker 5: wonderful thing if we all did this when we first

1589
01:15:09,280 --> 01:15:12,040
Speaker 5: meet someone, is compare notes on that, like what is

1590
01:15:12,080 --> 01:15:14,880
Speaker 5: it that you're looking for? You know, we don't share

1591
01:15:15,040 --> 01:15:17,680
Speaker 5: the vision that we have for relationship or really what

1592
01:15:17,720 --> 01:15:20,640
Speaker 5: we're looking for because we're too afraid to ask or

1593
01:15:21,080 --> 01:15:23,160
Speaker 5: just feels awkward to put that out there early on.

1594
01:15:23,280 --> 01:15:26,040
Speaker 5: But that would save us a whole lot of time

1595
01:15:26,080 --> 01:15:26,679
Speaker 5: and heartbreak.

1596
01:15:26,680 --> 01:15:29,920
Speaker 2: I think, Yeah, I mean, I agree, but I think

1597
01:15:30,000 --> 01:15:33,120
Speaker 2: I mean I went into that one knowing that, you know,

1598
01:15:34,080 --> 01:15:36,640
Speaker 2: he knew my personality type, and it was kind of

1599
01:15:36,640 --> 01:15:39,920
Speaker 2: almost like, let's see if since I had never really

1600
01:15:39,920 --> 01:15:42,240
Speaker 2: been in a serious relationship, it was like, I don't

1601
01:15:42,280 --> 01:15:44,280
Speaker 2: know how I act once I'm in a serial relationship,

1602
01:15:44,320 --> 01:15:46,320
Speaker 2: so let's see how it goes. So there was it

1603
01:15:46,400 --> 01:15:48,840
Speaker 2: was weird because we were friends and he knew my personality.

1604
01:15:48,840 --> 01:15:52,120
Speaker 2: It was just kind of you know, we got to

1605
01:15:52,160 --> 01:15:54,080
Speaker 2: a place where didn't it work?

1606
01:15:54,800 --> 01:15:58,240
Speaker 1: I have a question for you. Sorry, Yeah, My question

1607
01:15:58,400 --> 01:16:02,240
Speaker 1: is your parents you've mentioned, are in a perfect relationship

1608
01:16:02,320 --> 01:16:05,559
Speaker 1: together thirty years, each other's best friend. It's such a

1609
01:16:05,600 --> 01:16:08,640
Speaker 1: great marriage. Do you feel pressure to live up to that?

1610
01:16:08,760 --> 01:16:10,439
Speaker 1: Do you feel like there's no way you could ever

1611
01:16:10,479 --> 01:16:12,800
Speaker 1: have a relationship that's as perfect as your parents, the

1612
01:16:12,800 --> 01:16:13,920
Speaker 1: one you've seen your whole life.

1613
01:16:14,360 --> 01:16:16,080
Speaker 2: No, I've never felt pressure like that.

1614
01:16:16,520 --> 01:16:17,679
Speaker 1: Okay, Iver, send the question.

1615
01:16:19,160 --> 01:16:21,200
Speaker 2: Well, no, I mean it's kind of like I'm I'm

1616
01:16:21,520 --> 01:16:24,240
Speaker 2: I'm like a separate person in them. You know, like

1617
01:16:24,640 --> 01:16:27,599
Speaker 2: there's they met at a very different time and the

1618
01:16:27,680 --> 01:16:31,200
Speaker 2: world and life, and I think things are very different

1619
01:16:31,240 --> 01:16:33,960
Speaker 2: now and with my generation. But I think that's I've

1620
01:16:34,000 --> 01:16:36,040
Speaker 2: always been like, oh, I'd love to have that, But

1621
01:16:36,479 --> 01:16:38,719
Speaker 2: I've never felt like, oh if it's not like there's

1622
01:16:38,800 --> 01:16:40,160
Speaker 2: an People ask.

1623
01:16:40,080 --> 01:16:42,800
Speaker 3: Me that too, They say, are you do you think

1624
01:16:42,840 --> 01:16:44,800
Speaker 3: you're scared of being in a relationship because you're gonna

1625
01:16:44,800 --> 01:16:47,880
Speaker 3: get divorced like your parents, and you know, and I'm like, no,

1626
01:16:48,479 --> 01:16:50,600
Speaker 3: I loved my like I loved my parents together. I

1627
01:16:50,600 --> 01:16:52,960
Speaker 3: loved them divorced like I loved the whole thing, So

1628
01:16:53,080 --> 01:16:57,479
Speaker 3: that was never like to me, divorce is an equal pain.

1629
01:16:57,640 --> 01:16:59,960
Speaker 1: It's interesting because I just feel like our parents affect

1630
01:17:00,200 --> 01:17:02,920
Speaker 1: every relationship we have. Right's the one that we saw

1631
01:17:03,000 --> 01:17:04,280
Speaker 1: the first twenty years of our life.

1632
01:17:04,479 --> 01:17:06,800
Speaker 2: Totally. Yeah, I think that's very true.

1633
01:17:07,000 --> 01:17:08,519
Speaker 3: We answers here.

1634
01:17:09,320 --> 01:17:12,240
Speaker 5: I get too that Becca year about freedom, right. You

1635
01:17:12,280 --> 01:17:14,240
Speaker 5: don't want to be stuck, and I think the ultimate

1636
01:17:14,280 --> 01:17:18,200
Speaker 5: relationship frees you to be like the best version of yourself.

1637
01:17:18,400 --> 01:17:21,000
Speaker 5: And I ended up in a situation where I'd said

1638
01:17:21,040 --> 01:17:22,880
Speaker 5: I was never going to get divorced, never, never, never,

1639
01:17:22,880 --> 01:17:25,479
Speaker 5: because my parents did and I wanted to avoid that

1640
01:17:25,560 --> 01:17:29,640
Speaker 5: with my kids. Ten years in, I realized we absolutely

1641
01:17:29,680 --> 01:17:34,320
Speaker 5: had to get divorced, and we just engineered this incredible

1642
01:17:35,520 --> 01:17:40,160
Speaker 5: best friend, modern family, happy we still go on family

1643
01:17:40,240 --> 01:17:43,680
Speaker 5: vacations with our kids kind of situation because I was like,

1644
01:17:44,080 --> 01:17:46,640
Speaker 5: I'm not going to do it the broken way, so

1645
01:17:46,880 --> 01:17:49,280
Speaker 5: I'll just do it in a way that's really beautiful.

1646
01:17:49,280 --> 01:17:51,280
Speaker 5: I call him my husband. I don't even want to

1647
01:17:51,320 --> 01:17:55,920
Speaker 5: call him my ex. And there's just if you if

1648
01:17:55,960 --> 01:17:58,080
Speaker 5: you just own that, you're always going to be free

1649
01:17:58,120 --> 01:18:01,839
Speaker 5: somehow you'll always find a way. I think that enables

1650
01:18:01,880 --> 01:18:05,560
Speaker 5: you to be much more fluid and whatever comes.

1651
01:18:05,920 --> 01:18:09,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think I feel like we got

1652
01:18:09,280 --> 01:18:10,680
Speaker 2: a lot of I feel like I got a lot

1653
01:18:10,680 --> 01:18:11,320
Speaker 2: of information.

1654
01:18:11,560 --> 01:18:15,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the process to think processes. Sorry, I have

1655
01:18:15,160 --> 01:18:17,760
Speaker 3: a little bit of a list. Thank you so much

1656
01:18:17,760 --> 01:18:19,400
Speaker 3: for taking the time to talk to us today.

1657
01:18:19,520 --> 01:18:22,760
Speaker 5: Yeah, thank you anytime you guys. It was great.

1658
01:18:23,360 --> 01:18:25,200
Speaker 2: And then you have a website. Will you tell everyone

1659
01:18:25,280 --> 01:18:26,080
Speaker 2: your website?

1660
01:18:26,640 --> 01:18:30,000
Speaker 5: I do. It's sriheey dot com and it's spelled c

1661
01:18:30,400 --> 01:18:34,040
Speaker 5: h e r I e h e A l e y.

1662
01:18:34,240 --> 01:18:37,760
Speaker 5: And I'm really just about helping people poke all the

1663
01:18:37,800 --> 01:18:39,759
Speaker 5: possibilities in life, love and work.

1664
01:18:40,360 --> 01:18:42,400
Speaker 2: I love that. Well, thank you for joining us on

1665
01:18:42,439 --> 01:18:44,479
Speaker 2: the show and hopefully we'll talk to you soon.

1666
01:18:45,240 --> 01:18:46,639
Speaker 5: Absolutely, take care, guys.

1667
01:18:46,720 --> 01:18:48,200
Speaker 3: Thanks bye bye.

1668
01:18:48,840 --> 01:18:51,040
Speaker 2: Okay, Well that was it. What are you doing?

1669
01:18:52,040 --> 01:18:54,000
Speaker 3: I sent a tweet out to Rhya Sai Ryan Seacris.

1670
01:18:54,120 --> 01:18:55,799
Speaker 3: I just love you so much. Thank you for literally

1671
01:18:55,800 --> 01:18:57,920
Speaker 3: being the greatest brother in the world. Mears, but I said,

1672
01:18:57,920 --> 01:19:00,160
Speaker 3: happy to be your big bro. And potentially Timpty was

1673
01:19:00,240 --> 01:19:00,880
Speaker 3: brother in law?

1674
01:19:01,479 --> 01:19:03,320
Speaker 1: Did he did? He actually tagged Tim Tebow?

1675
01:19:03,600 --> 01:19:09,479
Speaker 2: Well, then he's sure. Wow, that is a breakthrough moment.

1676
01:19:10,680 --> 01:19:11,479
Speaker 2: You're so red.

1677
01:19:12,400 --> 01:19:17,320
Speaker 1: It's all right, Beca. You wanted to say something about

1678
01:19:17,360 --> 01:19:17,800
Speaker 1: pop tarts.

1679
01:19:18,760 --> 01:19:23,400
Speaker 2: Okay, So my favorite pop tarts growing up were the

1680
01:19:23,520 --> 01:19:27,360
Speaker 2: chocolate vanilla pop tarts, and they discontinued them at some

1681
01:19:27,439 --> 01:19:29,880
Speaker 2: point in my life, like like a few years ago,

1682
01:19:30,479 --> 01:19:33,920
Speaker 2: and I've just been very upset about it. And they

1683
01:19:33,920 --> 01:19:37,320
Speaker 2: brought him back as like a fiftieth anniversary or something,

1684
01:19:37,400 --> 01:19:41,160
Speaker 2: and then and then they took him back away from me.

1685
01:19:41,720 --> 01:19:45,200
Speaker 2: So the other day, I'm randomly thinking about these pop tarts.

1686
01:19:45,280 --> 01:19:47,120
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm gonna tweet them and see if they,

1687
01:19:47,240 --> 01:19:48,040
Speaker 2: like have any intention.

1688
01:19:48,120 --> 01:19:51,400
Speaker 1: You may have a problem. Okay, Yeah, who's randomly thinking

1689
01:19:51,400 --> 01:19:52,400
Speaker 1: about a certain flavor?

1690
01:19:53,920 --> 01:19:56,160
Speaker 2: Someone wrote me about a pop tart and then I

1691
01:19:56,280 --> 01:19:57,320
Speaker 2: like started, I.

1692
01:19:57,240 --> 01:19:59,760
Speaker 3: Don't even judge it because I get this excited about

1693
01:19:59,800 --> 01:20:00,880
Speaker 3: the far so.

1694
01:20:00,960 --> 01:20:03,760
Speaker 2: Like, okay, thank you for relating to Yeah. Okay, So

1695
01:20:03,880 --> 01:20:06,759
Speaker 2: I tweet them and I'm like, dear pop Tarts, please

1696
01:20:06,840 --> 01:20:11,280
Speaker 2: bring back the chocolate vanilla pop tarts. They're my favorite.

1697
01:20:11,360 --> 01:20:13,920
Speaker 2: I was like, imagine loving something for so long and

1698
01:20:13,920 --> 01:20:16,599
Speaker 2: then it being taken away from you. It's just like

1699
01:20:16,720 --> 01:20:22,000
Speaker 2: Jack Pearson, like, please bring them back? Yeah, literally, I

1700
01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:25,320
Speaker 2: just happened to go click on their page. The first

1701
01:20:25,400 --> 01:20:28,519
Speaker 2: tweet is guess who's back, and it was the chocolate

1702
01:20:28,560 --> 01:20:31,320
Speaker 2: vanilla pop tarts they posted eleven hours before I wrote

1703
01:20:31,400 --> 01:20:34,640
Speaker 2: the sweet. So it's almost synergy.

1704
01:20:34,880 --> 01:20:35,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, you've eaten.

1705
01:20:35,760 --> 01:20:38,080
Speaker 1: So many pop tarts that you've like become one with them.

1706
01:20:38,200 --> 01:20:38,400
Speaker 3: I know.

1707
01:20:38,439 --> 01:20:39,360
Speaker 2: I'm like in synclic.

1708
01:20:39,520 --> 01:20:41,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, so when are they bringing them back?

1709
01:20:41,640 --> 01:20:43,080
Speaker 2: It says they're back, So I gotta go to the

1710
01:20:43,080 --> 01:20:43,960
Speaker 2: store check it out.

1711
01:20:44,040 --> 01:20:45,200
Speaker 3: Should I try one of these?

1712
01:20:45,680 --> 01:20:48,519
Speaker 2: Yes, with butter on it. I'll hop Teddy's listening to.

1713
01:20:49,439 --> 01:20:52,920
Speaker 2: But it's chocolate vanilla. It's chocolate like crust and it

1714
01:20:52,920 --> 01:20:56,040
Speaker 2: has like cream like vanilla cream inside.

1715
01:20:56,120 --> 01:20:58,679
Speaker 3: Okay, I'll try one bite. I'll try one bite.

1716
01:20:58,720 --> 01:21:00,439
Speaker 1: I would try. I mean, I love I love hot.

1717
01:21:00,479 --> 01:21:04,040
Speaker 1: I don't eat. I would not, but oh.

1718
01:21:03,920 --> 01:21:06,840
Speaker 2: My gosh, I'm bringing Yeah, just one bite with butter.

1719
01:21:07,160 --> 01:21:09,559
Speaker 3: It's one bite. If I'm gonna do it, you can.

1720
01:21:10,120 --> 01:21:10,759
Speaker 2: Yeah. True.

1721
01:21:11,640 --> 01:21:13,320
Speaker 3: Also, you don't like the smorest ones.

1722
01:21:15,200 --> 01:21:20,040
Speaker 1: So I'm more Apple. Apple's great. He likes pies like

1723
01:21:20,360 --> 01:21:24,840
Speaker 1: I do like I do like pie over cake. Yeah,

1724
01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:28,960
Speaker 1: but first, what do you guys doing for Valentine's It's

1725
01:21:28,960 --> 01:21:30,800
Speaker 1: actually very sweet what you guys doing for Valentine's Day,

1726
01:21:30,800 --> 01:21:31,479
Speaker 1: so talk about that.

1727
01:21:32,120 --> 01:21:34,559
Speaker 2: I'm very excited about Valentine's Day. This year. We're going

1728
01:21:34,560 --> 01:21:37,120
Speaker 2: to Children's Hospital in Orange County.

1729
01:21:36,920 --> 01:21:38,320
Speaker 3: Making Valentine grams.

1730
01:21:38,400 --> 01:21:41,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, with all the chill, I hope there's gonna be

1731
01:21:41,600 --> 01:21:43,240
Speaker 2: What were we gonna be like in the little studio?

1732
01:21:43,520 --> 01:21:43,760
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1733
01:21:43,880 --> 01:21:46,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was. Every time I've gone down there, I

1734
01:21:46,479 --> 01:21:52,879
Speaker 2: leave feeling just so grateful and like they are. It's

1735
01:21:53,160 --> 01:21:55,559
Speaker 2: it's something very special that they have down there.

1736
01:21:55,720 --> 01:21:58,559
Speaker 3: Yeah, and Caara, we should shout out to Kara. Kara

1737
01:21:58,840 --> 01:22:02,639
Speaker 3: is an actual angel that lives on Earth.

1738
01:22:03,120 --> 01:22:05,439
Speaker 2: So I was studying in call it when I went

1739
01:22:05,439 --> 01:22:08,280
Speaker 2: to school. That was my major was to do what

1740
01:22:08,400 --> 01:22:10,760
Speaker 2: Caroen does. And after like being around her and seeing

1741
01:22:10,760 --> 01:22:13,320
Speaker 2: what she does, I'm like, she's everything i'd want to

1742
01:22:13,360 --> 01:22:14,639
Speaker 2: be if I were in that position.

1743
01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:17,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, so strong though, like so so strong.

1744
01:22:18,240 --> 01:22:20,320
Speaker 1: What if we decided Grace quiz next week or something?

1745
01:22:20,320 --> 01:22:21,599
Speaker 1: I guess we'd have to do grace right.

1746
01:22:22,280 --> 01:22:24,560
Speaker 2: I took the hardest Grace quiz the other day. I

1747
01:22:24,600 --> 01:22:26,719
Speaker 2: got two answers. Right, Oh wow, it was bad.

1748
01:22:26,880 --> 01:22:29,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think great, Come on Okay, another Grace Anatomy

1749
01:22:29,320 --> 01:22:31,080
Speaker 1: quiz next week, and this will be the ultimate one

1750
01:22:31,120 --> 01:22:32,840
Speaker 1: because and then we'll actually.

1751
01:22:32,680 --> 01:22:34,600
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'll get down and dirty.

1752
01:22:34,240 --> 01:22:36,519
Speaker 1: On It won't be an anti climax like the last

1753
01:22:36,520 --> 01:22:37,080
Speaker 1: couple of bags.

1754
01:22:37,160 --> 01:22:39,200
Speaker 2: No, no, that was just a practice round.

1755
01:22:39,280 --> 01:22:41,320
Speaker 1: Well, start thinking about what you're gonna do, because I'm

1756
01:22:41,360 --> 01:22:42,240
Speaker 1: going to we need to make it.

1757
01:22:42,640 --> 01:22:44,880
Speaker 2: Look through your phone to really see who my options are.

1758
01:22:45,960 --> 01:22:46,439
Speaker 3: Good luck?

1759
01:22:46,960 --> 01:22:48,920
Speaker 1: And will you watch last week's Grace or are you

1760
01:22:48,920 --> 01:22:50,400
Speaker 1: just gonna skip it? Because nobody seemed to.

1761
01:22:50,520 --> 01:22:52,760
Speaker 2: I know, I'm totally gonna watch it. I just like

1762
01:22:53,360 --> 01:22:56,000
Speaker 2: I didn't. Oh oh, this is what happened. I So

1763
01:22:56,040 --> 01:22:58,120
Speaker 2: it came on Thursday night and I wasn't home to

1764
01:22:58,120 --> 01:23:00,439
Speaker 2: watch it live and then the next day to watch

1765
01:23:00,439 --> 01:23:03,280
Speaker 2: it on Hulu. My WiFi was out all day and

1766
01:23:03,320 --> 01:23:05,160
Speaker 2: then I went to Stanta, Barbara. That's why I haven't

1767
01:23:05,160 --> 01:23:05,720
Speaker 2: watched it yet.

1768
01:23:06,080 --> 01:23:09,479
Speaker 3: Wait, what else are we gonna do before next week? Oh,

1769
01:23:09,520 --> 01:23:11,439
Speaker 3: we're gonna go out. We're gonna get your mojo back.

1770
01:23:11,560 --> 01:23:12,960
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, okay.

1771
01:23:12,880 --> 01:23:16,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna do that. I wanted

1772
01:23:16,520 --> 01:23:19,519
Speaker 2: to say a quick thank you to our guest life

1773
01:23:19,560 --> 01:23:23,920
Speaker 2: coach Sari Heally and Tyler my first kiss. Thank you

1774
01:23:24,040 --> 01:23:30,400
Speaker 2: for reaffirming that I have always been emotionally distanced. I

1775
01:23:30,439 --> 01:23:32,040
Speaker 2: was gonna say stunt it too, but I was like,

1776
01:23:32,080 --> 01:23:35,480
Speaker 2: that's harsh for myself. Thank you for all your emails.

1777
01:23:35,560 --> 01:23:38,640
Speaker 2: We literally live for them. They're our favorite part of

1778
01:23:38,680 --> 01:23:42,400
Speaker 2: the show. I have to say, please keep sending them

1779
01:23:42,400 --> 01:23:47,160
Speaker 2: in scrubbing in at iHeartMedia dot com. Next week we'll

1780
01:23:47,200 --> 01:23:49,880
Speaker 2: do another Grace quiz. We'll check the status of my

1781
01:23:49,960 --> 01:23:53,160
Speaker 2: mojo see if we got anything back. And until then,

1782
01:23:53,760 --> 01:23:56,920
Speaker 2: I'm a death oh no thirteen oh five.

1783
01:24:03,600 --> 01:24:04,960
Speaker 3: I get so sad when it's over.