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Speaker 1: Guess what decision we're about to make a horrible decisions.

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Speaker 1: Hey guys, we're back. Welcome to another episode of Hoary

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Speaker 1: Blair Decisions. What I don't look at me like this? Bro,

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Speaker 1: Well we're gonna do the show in blade. I don't

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Speaker 1: know what the fun this bitch said. Bro, Okay, decisions.

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Speaker 1: I'm figure about Mandy v A k A debt bitch. Hi,

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Speaker 1: I'm wheezy. If you're listening to us, we're gonna try

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Speaker 1: to make it as sexy as you can. If you're

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Speaker 1: looking at us, see him. No, this is not us

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Speaker 1: trying to bring We have plat on right now. This

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Speaker 1: is trying to slip stick on and I feel like

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Speaker 1: we did some effort. Our guests is wearing glitter Nigga's.

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Speaker 1: If you wash the show on your computer, your phone,

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Speaker 1: you can put on your TV because the ship's in

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Speaker 1: for ok. I want to introduce our guests for the week.

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Speaker 1: She is someone that I met what two years now ago? Again?

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Speaker 1: Someone else that I met and s w we did

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Speaker 1: a panel together. I'm not everybody at a party. Literally,

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Speaker 1: Sure do and I stay connected because we do a

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Speaker 1: little bit more than talking there. Um, Well, I want

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Speaker 1: to introduce uh to you guys. Tianna. Hi. Hey, So,

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Speaker 1: Tianna is a conscious heatonist, poll activist and cannabis enthusiasts. Sweet. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I am Roger that. I mean it found like it

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Speaker 1: made more sense for pretty much, but not only that,

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Speaker 1: she has found definitely a way to advocate for sex

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Speaker 1: work amidst the entire pandemic and almost on a weekly basis.

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Speaker 1: You know you were sending me all of these just

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Speaker 1: virtual panels and events. Can you, I guess, open up

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Speaker 1: a little bit to our to our audience about what

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Speaker 1: that was like and what your activism has been during

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Speaker 1: COVID amazing? Thank you so much for having me. I'm

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Speaker 1: so honored and excited to be here. And that night

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Speaker 1: was amazing. I know you want to giggle, said, I

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Speaker 1: just don't want where you made out with the girl

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Speaker 1: that Yes, that night literally made all with her and

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Speaker 1: she was a guest on this show. If you guys

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Speaker 1: listened to the episode, I can't remember her name. Forgive me.

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Speaker 1: I know you're probably listening, and I really liked you.

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Speaker 1: We had a disabled girl that came on, and we

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Speaker 1: had aisha who hosted the show with me. Her name

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Speaker 1: was as Just so you know Mandy. No, Mandy didn't

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Speaker 1: tell me I a should hit me up to Dick

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Speaker 1: say she's like, hey, babe. She was like, I just

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Speaker 1: went to a party where Mandy hosted the panel, and

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Speaker 1: it was wild. We made out last night and I

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Speaker 1: was like, no, I don't know. We all woke up there.

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Speaker 1: You have to go to work the next morning. That

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Speaker 1: was with my seven foot tree that everybody wanted to climb.

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Speaker 1: He was beautiful, beautiful, I remember, Yeah, it was that

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Speaker 1: night and listen, his dick was really big, and I

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Speaker 1: just didn't want Dick that night, so I said, all

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Speaker 1: of you can have him, and me and her just

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Speaker 1: kind of cuddled and made out and she was my diner.

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Speaker 1: But those things also happened. It wasn't coming with our pussy.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, I I literally I didn't really pay him

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Speaker 1: much attention. Everyone else did though, Yes they did, yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: and that was wild for him. But we met that night.

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Speaker 1: So that for you um doing the panel, Yes you were.

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Speaker 1: We were on the same panel together, and I told

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Speaker 1: it was with us, was it Zach? Was that? Yes? Anything?

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Speaker 1: Who came? And then also the girl from Girls Guys, Yes,

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Speaker 1: guys be fucked and Dame products, the woman who owns

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Speaker 1: Damn Dame own. Yes, yes she was. She was there

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Speaker 1: as well. It was fun. So what is the conscious

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Speaker 1: camp we're gonna talk about? They hated this but a

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Speaker 1: horrible decision. But I wanted to talk about, just as

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Speaker 1: an introduction to you a little bit, your sex advocacy,

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Speaker 1: your sex work advocacy. Yes, definitely, um so I support

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Speaker 1: sex workers of all different avenues. And sex work is

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Speaker 1: a very broad term we've got used now. So most

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Speaker 1: people when you think sex work, you think prostitute in

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Speaker 1: person kind of work. Um but it's sex work is

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Speaker 1: prostitution as well as an escorting, but stripping and cam girling, sugaring,

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Speaker 1: absolutely sugaring. People like to exclude sugaring, and I like

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Speaker 1: to bring them back in. Why have you heard that

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Speaker 1: people like to exclude sugar daddies and sex work? But

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Speaker 1: you do feel like it is that because it's more

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Speaker 1: socially acceptable and it fits within our gender normative source

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Speaker 1: of dynamics. And so because we're used to seeing an

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Speaker 1: older man taking care of a younger person, that then

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Speaker 1: when you do it in a more official context, like

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Speaker 1: creating a seeking arrangements profile, Let's say or making more

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Speaker 1: clear about what your boundaries are you will and will

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Speaker 1: not do. We're saying if you like my time, then

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Speaker 1: it costs this much, and being more explicit about these

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Speaker 1: kind of interactions. That is sex work. I've definitely told

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Speaker 1: it's now that like when I think back to when

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Speaker 1: I've dated guys and maybe like you know, just having

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Speaker 1: conversations like I've you ever done this? So that would

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Speaker 1: be like, yeah, I was never an escort, but you

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Speaker 1: know I had a sugar daddy nigger. I was damn

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Speaker 1: sure of being like it for me. Yes, yes, I

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Speaker 1: was about to say, but we also talked about even

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Speaker 1: as a little uh there's uh what's your price? So

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Speaker 1: there's a dating app where you are you're charging for

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Speaker 1: your time. Even that would still be considered a form

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Speaker 1: of sex. Yes, definitely. But if doms don't have sex either,

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Speaker 1: and so they're also sex workers and so you don't,

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Speaker 1: it doesn't necessarily mean explicit act. It's about the intention

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Speaker 1: and how you're interacting in the movement exchange of money.

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Speaker 1: Are we doing sex work? You guys, are a form

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Speaker 1: of sex workers. That's how you self identify. Also, I

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Speaker 1: I like to make very clear you can't label someone

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Speaker 1: a sex worker and out them. That's a big thing

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Speaker 1: in the sex worker community actually of respecting those boundaries.

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Speaker 1: So if you sugar and you said you're sugar baby

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Speaker 1: and you didn't identify as a sex worker, I'm not

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Speaker 1: going to then be like, no, you were, you know,

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Speaker 1: like I actually I'll make it. I'll lay out like,

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Speaker 1: these are the terms of what we identify as sex work.

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Speaker 1: So technically, if you agree with these terms, then yes

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Speaker 1: you're a sex worker, but I'm not going to force

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Speaker 1: that definition on you. The older I get, I realized

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Speaker 1: that um outing is a thing because I used to

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Speaker 1: be very confused when I would see certain girls like

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Speaker 1: doing it like that sex work. Why are they acting

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Speaker 1: like it's not thinking that they were hiding it more

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Speaker 1: than it's like safety. And I think the acknowledging that

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Speaker 1: and understanding that really it took me a long time

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Speaker 1: to get it because I was kind of like, well,

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Speaker 1: bit yesterday, fair you just acting like you want a trip,

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Speaker 1: chilling and yeah, but then it's just like, oh, you

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Speaker 1: really can't just say you're getting flown out to no

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Speaker 1: I mean owls, And I was like, you need to

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Speaker 1: pay for my time. I'm missing work, right, but did

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Speaker 1: you say that when you didn't have a podcast? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: because I used to say, uh, this is how I

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Speaker 1: was a bartender. So, but CHALL used to tell them,

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Speaker 1: whatever night, it could be a Tuesday, this is our

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Speaker 1: popping night. I make the most money. You gotta make up.

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Speaker 1: You gotta teach. You know what guys tell me once,

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Speaker 1: don't you got PTO? I was like, not for you,

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Speaker 1: this is okay, okay. So what has it been like

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Speaker 1: doing these sort of things virtually? And what have you

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Speaker 1: been doing during COVID? Yes, so I've in general was

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Speaker 1: doing sex positive events of all different varieties UM. And

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Speaker 1: some were sex worker focus, but some were just like

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Speaker 1: a safe space for people to explore the you know,

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Speaker 1: watching porn and a group and also understanding their gender

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Speaker 1: orientation and identities. And so I started working with the

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Speaker 1: Bipop Collective UM, which is an amazing adult industry collective

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Speaker 1: that is there to help the systemic racism in porn

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Speaker 1: specifically and help dismantling the stigma and stereotypes that we

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Speaker 1: see because porn is kind of the last frontier where racism,

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Speaker 1: like blatant racism, like using racial slurs in directory language

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Speaker 1: and symbols, you know, even imagery. It's socially, Yeah, there

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Speaker 1: was a dog during COVID, there was a rise in

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Speaker 1: cop porn, and so that is like of complete, like

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Speaker 1: I guess what am I trying to say. It's a

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Speaker 1: complete slap in the face to Black Lives Matter in

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Speaker 1: my opinion of like this racist pornography being pushed and

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Speaker 1: amplified on many platforms and one we actually got as

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Speaker 1: a sponsor for a conference that I did, and so

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Speaker 1: that became kind of the dialogue of us creating the

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Speaker 1: Sex Work Survival Guide, which is now becoming a nonprofit

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Speaker 1: that I'm the president of, where we can create free

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Speaker 1: resources for people, so it's not behind a paywall, and

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Speaker 1: it's everything that you need to know to protect yourself

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Speaker 1: from laws and legislation, from content creation and marketing, from

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Speaker 1: production and s c O. Also for community knowing who

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Speaker 1: else is out there to support you, for housing, for

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Speaker 1: mutual aid, for what your groceries, whatever you may need.

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Speaker 1: We wanted to provide these resources for people and it

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Speaker 1: was so amazing the feedback that when I played Devil's Advocate,

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Speaker 1: even though absolutely, yes, cop porn, Yes we've dressed off

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Speaker 1: as cops for Halloween, it's become a fantasy handcuffs. Can

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Speaker 1: we really police, no pun what people are into sexually.

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Speaker 1: If it's not, I don't want to say that bad.

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Speaker 1: But if it's not racially charged, it's cop porn really bad. No,

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Speaker 1: And I would say there's a difference between cop role

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Speaker 1: play and race play. Those are two different fetishes, so

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Speaker 1: I would separate them. Do you think that race play

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Speaker 1: should exist within who? I actually got some trouble on

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Speaker 1: the internet because of my thoughts about this. To I,

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Speaker 1: to be quite honest, UM, do not think that people

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Speaker 1: in marginalized groups should be um the subject of race play,

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Speaker 1: and the other way around, I think is fine UM,

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Speaker 1: which is fucked up. White people will probably call it

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Speaker 1: wait wait, okay, yeah, I'm trying to think so, so

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Speaker 1: I don't think there should be imagery of black people

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Speaker 1: doing um slave play. For example, the play that came out,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if anybody went to go see it.

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Speaker 1: Um too expensive they needed a discount ticket. One of

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Speaker 1: the most amazing plays I've ever seen. Talked about good Yes,

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Speaker 1: you talked about Sharonas and I went. I went with

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Speaker 1: another one of my friends. I saw three so slaves playing.

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Speaker 1: Excuse me that beautiful. The black person were at the play,

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Speaker 1: yeah queer, but also um, the two PM shows were

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Speaker 1: like forty five really yes, so basically um, enslave play.

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Speaker 1: When I when I was getting ready to see people

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Speaker 1: like this is riveting, this is intense, it's amazing. Um,

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Speaker 1: if you don't want to know what this is about,

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Speaker 1: skip it. It's not anything triggering. But I'm only guys

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Speaker 1: because you might end up wanting to read it or

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Speaker 1: see it. So enslave play I thought, much like everybody thought,

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Speaker 1: we were going to be watching slavery and slave Play

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Speaker 1: was a completely sexual eye show about slave play with

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Speaker 1: interracial couples and was fired. Starts with you watching a

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Speaker 1: white guy slapping this girl in the ass, slapping her

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Speaker 1: in the face yes sorry black woman, and you're like,

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Speaker 1: what the fund is going on? Like this feels like

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Speaker 1: so weird to see about to rape her, and then

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Speaker 1: you realize like, oh, this is consensual and it was

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Speaker 1: like actual slave play. Then there was a gay couple.

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Speaker 1: They lived in Harlem. They kept talking about it was

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Speaker 1: it was awesome. But they started their seeing basically with

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Speaker 1: the black dude being the master and the white guy

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Speaker 1: licking his boot, and that was their slave play and

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Speaker 1: they all went through therapy. Oh beautiful, and so I

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Speaker 1: was like, hold on, I'm racist, but she left Trader

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Speaker 1: Joe was fired. Yeah. Basically you're watching slave play go

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Speaker 1: on in a different way in some scenarios. And when

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Speaker 1: I watched that, I was like okay, because when the

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Speaker 1: white guys licked the boot, I was kind of yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's called boot blacking. Yeah, then the whole fetish category

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Speaker 1: still learning ship. We ain't talk about that as a cake.

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Speaker 1: We gonna have nothing else black. Yes, okay, you just

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Speaker 1: licked the bottom of boot. It's the bottom of the top.

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Speaker 1: It depends on what the dynamic is, but yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: a whole. I'm not going to pretend that I'm the fetish,

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Speaker 1: but I am aware of it and follow some accounts

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Speaker 1: where that's what their focus is. I wasn't turned on

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Speaker 1: at the boot. I was turned on at the white guy. Yes, no, no, no.

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Speaker 1: To me, that's like emotional reparations kind of seeing that

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Speaker 1: that kind of you know, an imagery and interaction because

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Speaker 1: of just like generational trauma and pts like slave PTSD

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Speaker 1: and so kind of seeing that is therapeutic, you know,

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Speaker 1: seeing those images for me, I I can speak for myself.

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Speaker 1: Is very therapeutic. I felt great and yes, yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: So with that said, I think that was the race

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Speaker 1: play that I found. Okay, yeah, and um, I think

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Speaker 1: Vinny he's our tour assistant and he has come on

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Speaker 1: a few of our shows, but he's told me an

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Speaker 1: instance where somebody was like wanting to do something like

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Speaker 1: that with him. He was like, bitch, I was out.

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Speaker 1: But he even said so much as like he doesn't

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Speaker 1: even like hearing BBC anymore. Yea, like the connotation of

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Speaker 1: it is so deep rooted and racist. Absolutely it is. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: I'm asking you what how you feel about race play?

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Speaker 1: What made you almost you know, get attacked on the

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Speaker 1: internet or whatever. Yes, so right, kind of around the

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Speaker 1: time George Floyd happened, we were I was doing a

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Speaker 1: conference series with my friend Lola jeane Um where we

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Speaker 1: wanted to talk about conflict resolution, and so under that umbrella,

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Speaker 1: we have different keynote speakers that uh, you know, target

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Speaker 1: how to get to conflict resolution in different ways, and

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Speaker 1: so one of them was like, oh, I'm sorry, I'm confusing.

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Speaker 1: My conferences were that one was about with you everybody.

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Speaker 1: We were doing them every six weeks, so now that

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Speaker 1: they've all kind of merged in my brain a bit.

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Speaker 1: Oh No, this one was about fantasies and desires actually,

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Speaker 1: and so that we were talking about race play when

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Speaker 1: our desires and fantasies conflict with social norms or a

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Speaker 1: cross ethical boundaries. And so within that context we talked

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Speaker 1: about race play, and due to the closeness of it

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Speaker 1: being to George Floyd, I personally was like, white people

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Speaker 1: need to know this. They need to know how they're

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Speaker 1: sexualizing us, how they're objectifying us when we're in play parties,

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Speaker 1: when we're walking down street. When you say when you

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Speaker 1: like that big gass, what does that really mean? You know?

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Speaker 1: Or when that big gass is being shadow band because

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Speaker 1: it's black, but a white big gass is not being

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Speaker 1: shadow band, what does that mean? Why are these things happening,

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Speaker 1: whether they're conscious or unconscious, And so that was really

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Speaker 1: important for me. But I realized from what other people's

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Speaker 1: responses were that the timing was not right. They wasn't

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Speaker 1: ready for they were not ready for the conversation exactly.

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Speaker 1: And also as an event curator, I realized I should

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Speaker 1: have maybe said, the next speaker is going to be

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Speaker 1: talking about a triggering topic. We just had an incident

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Speaker 1: with George Floyd. You know, acknowledge the social context of

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Speaker 1: what's happening to prepare people so that they could opt

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Speaker 1: They always had the choice to opt out, UM, but

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Speaker 1: give them that moment so that they could do that

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Speaker 1: UM before they were subjected to these kind of conversations.

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Speaker 1: And that's something that even as horrible decisions. If you

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Speaker 1: guys listen back to our first maybe hundred and fifty episodes,

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Speaker 1: I don't think we've even started the trigger warnings until recently,

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Speaker 1: just because we do understand the context of some of

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Speaker 1: our conversations being triggering, or some of the guests share

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Speaker 1: very you know, personal things about themselves that someone else

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Speaker 1: could be experiencing. UM. And so that's something new to

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Speaker 1: where even with this podcast, this could be triggering. Just

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Speaker 1: to you do have to give grace to the audience.

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Speaker 1: I do want to get into it though you was

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Speaker 1: black s excellence, But let me let me uh update

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Speaker 1: you guys. Speaking of what we just talked about, Reese Taylor.

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Speaker 1: After surviving sexual violence in nineteen recy, Taylor sought justice

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Speaker 1: against the six white men who assaulted her, despite their

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Speaker 1: repeated death threats. Although two court appearances failed to indict them,

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Speaker 1: Taylor continued to speak out against the widespread and pervasive

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Speaker 1: rates of sexual violence against black women, specifically living in

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Speaker 1: the South. Rosa Parks took interest in Taylor's case and

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Speaker 1: highlighted her struggle by launching the Alabama Committee for Equal Justice. Today,

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Speaker 1: Reese Taylor remains a pivotal an historical Black icon in

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Speaker 1: the US movement against sexual violence. So let's give it

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Speaker 1: to her. UM our vanilla ship this week. I don't

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Speaker 1: know why they've been like the easiest place to get

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Speaker 1: fucking sex news Vice. Y'all know we were on Vice

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Speaker 1: a couple of times. Shout out to them. Now you're

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Speaker 1: on there a few times. UM, So, especially as we've

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Speaker 1: sat here and we opened up the show in speaking

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Speaker 1: of you know, a queer lesbian, uh bisexual sort of interaction.

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Speaker 1: It's crazy because our vanilla ship for this week talks

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Speaker 1: about what schools should teach queer women about sex. UM

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Speaker 1: and I did want to talk to you guys because

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Speaker 1: of course, if we even go back to the lack

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Speaker 1: of sexual education early on, we all think about what

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Speaker 1: the condom and the banana and really never anything about

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Speaker 1: even mental damns and finger comments, all of those things

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Speaker 1: we don't even know whether really to get them unless

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Speaker 1: they're free at a clinic. Fact, I want to ask

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Speaker 1: both of y'all, what do you think maybe should be

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Speaker 1: included or if it should be included even as far

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Speaker 1: as queer education for women. First off, I don't know

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Speaker 1: why just for women it's like something that's okay. Well,

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Speaker 1: I mean because I think women there's it's a lot

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Speaker 1: easier to find instances of women kissing, even on TV,

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Speaker 1: music videos whatever. Whereas men and their relationships like or

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Speaker 1: their sexual relationships, I feel like no one ever really

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Speaker 1: understands or sees um. But I would say it would

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Speaker 1: need to be for everybody. Um, I will at my

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Speaker 1: I don't know if it was hall mack or sex

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Speaker 1: sex out or whatever it was. She was gay not

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Speaker 1: because she told us, but because her fucking outfits told

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Speaker 1: us every day. And maybe she was the bitch as

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Speaker 1: gay as hell, and she also coached the volleyball team.

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Speaker 1: You were, but you be looking at hella gay yo plant,

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Speaker 1: But why you're still a gayer though, Dave? Because I'm

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Speaker 1: sorry Benson said it last time, I'm not gonna ask

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Speaker 1: him because he might be biased Dave, who looks gayer? Okay,

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Speaker 1: first off, I have a bomber jacket on. It doesn't

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Speaker 1: matter who looks gay or boom say you my finger

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Speaker 1: was pointed at you when he said yep right now. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Out of everyone in this room, I'd be the only

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Speaker 1: one that we are working together, so we I did

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Speaker 1: want to tell you why this is about woman um

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Speaker 1: And it's actually funny because I believe we spoke about

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Speaker 1: this with your friend that came on who like the

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Speaker 1: rainbow Kristen and Christen the reason why? And I want

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Speaker 1: to ask you too, if there's maybe any other reason

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Speaker 1: why you believe It says that she didn't know how

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Speaker 1: to answer that question. That is why. So it says

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Speaker 1: it is revealed that worrying uh that a worrying amount

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Speaker 1: of queer teen girls in the US had no idea

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Speaker 1: that they could even pick up s t I s

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Speaker 1: from other girls or their vaginas. We also know that

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Speaker 1: LGBTQ six sex ed is hugely is a hugely contentious

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Speaker 1: subject um, which means that kids really are not learning

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Speaker 1: about it. But throwing in the fact that queer women

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Speaker 1: are less likely to also disclose their orientation to healthcare providers. Unsurprisingly,

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Speaker 1: a lot of specific concerns are flying under the radar

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Speaker 1: when it comes to sexual health with women. UM, and

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Speaker 1: that is the thing UM for context what Mandy was

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Speaker 1: talking about. UM, we had a friend of mine come on.

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Speaker 1: She's an author who um as a lesbian and had

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Speaker 1: a book come out bestseller and she had a lot

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Speaker 1: of lesbian scenes in there, and she was like, people

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Speaker 1: have never even seen period scenes when they're reading and

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Speaker 1: just different stuff about teenage girls and as she fought

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Speaker 1: a bitch at Michael's. Yeah, that was a great story. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she said, where do we ask them? My favorite daughter? Oh,

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Speaker 1: my god, because you're kind of clear, so she said,

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Speaker 1: she gave me a scount. But she was saying Mandy

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Speaker 1: was like, what kind of STDs can you get if

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Speaker 1: you're gay or l lesbian? And I also like for women,

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Speaker 1: we always you know, ask maybe is you clean or

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Speaker 1: that's something that men ask us, But when it comes

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Speaker 1: to women, there's really no conversations. And even the more

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Speaker 1: I do like my other pod, there's also not enough

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Speaker 1: conversations regarding even our periods. B v yeast a whole

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Speaker 1: bunch of things that just women go through. It they

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Speaker 1: go through it, even their cycles they go through. So

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Speaker 1: when dealing with a woman partner, I know that even

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Speaker 1: me and my friends aren't is open. So yeah, when

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Speaker 1: when that question was brought up, she was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I've never really asked to see results from a woman.

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Speaker 1: Very dental damn. I thing. Yeah, and honestly, like and

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Speaker 1: the shout outs to Christen, She's not like someone who

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Speaker 1: I would consider like super like Foozy wild as crazy bitch.

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Speaker 1: But that someone at Michael's that she met at Michael's,

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Speaker 1: I think it was like a cashier. I just feel

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Speaker 1: like that's a level level. That's the level vanilla, Like

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Speaker 1: you're worried the bodega, just the bodega behind bag you

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Speaker 1: know what about christ with a friend of Christopher's home

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Speaker 1: met her and she's white, right, and so I was

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Speaker 1: like kind of changing my tone. We first met a

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Speaker 1: few years ago. I was like yeah, and she's like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I heard your about your podcast. I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's kind of nasty. She was like, Oh, outside of S,

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Speaker 1: T I S and STDs, do you think that there

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Speaker 1: should be again, because you hold a lot of these panels,

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Speaker 1: what else do you think would be important for queer

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Speaker 1: woman education. Yes, absolutely. I think you had a really

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Speaker 1: great point, Mazy about just queer education in general. And

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Speaker 1: I think the first step is that queerness is a spectrum,

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Speaker 1: and the spectrum that we currently are basing it on

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Speaker 1: is the Kinzie we talked about all times. I mean, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you guys do it all the way And she said, guy,

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Speaker 1: you know what's right now. It's a little it's a

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Speaker 1: sextrum and it can change as you as you, depending

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Speaker 1: on the person, depending on where you are in your life.

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Speaker 1: And so that's one of the things that I think

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Speaker 1: needs to be taught is that it is a spectrum.

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Speaker 1: And so I would think so right, not really get

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Speaker 1: the stigma that people don't feel don't feel queer enough,

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Speaker 1: like am I lesbian enough? For am I this? Because

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Speaker 1: I don't do these certain things. I don't dress the

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Speaker 1: certain thing people. I'm sure you guys have had someone

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Speaker 1: say what is sex with a girl? Like, what do

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Speaker 1: you mean you have sex? I like not explaining sex

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Speaker 1: because we all assume sex is penetrative. Like people always

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Speaker 1: say what a sex? Men have asked me, all, what

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Speaker 1: do you mean you fuck her? How did you sucker

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Speaker 1: like that? You know? I pulled up. Yeah, that's the thing, right,

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Speaker 1: Like people would tell me that I wasn't really sucking

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Speaker 1: my girlfriend because I wasn't. No, but even with a

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Speaker 1: heteronormative relationship, sex is more than just pen ingittive, you know.

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Speaker 1: So that's what I always like to flip it on

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Speaker 1: people's head when they kind of like that's weird. They're like, well,

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Speaker 1: actually you're doing the same thing, just calling it something differently.

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Speaker 1: But just because you're we're not doing that does not

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Speaker 1: lessen it or you know, disqualify it at all. Um.

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Speaker 1: So that's even though I will say, I feel like

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Speaker 1: you're someone who would say this problematic. But I only

426
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:23,680
Speaker 1: count the guys I fund because I feel like the

427
00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:30,360
Speaker 1: pussy stayed tight. No, bites don't really stretched me out

428
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:32,919
Speaker 1: like that. I don't even come in there like I

429
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 1: have not had sex, and I'm like, bit, you was

430
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:38,600
Speaker 1: just with scissors last that doesn't count. She's one of those,

431
00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:40,800
Speaker 1: like a lot of my friends, they just don't be

432
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:44,320
Speaker 1: counting rub They just don't be counting sex. Like like

433
00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:46,120
Speaker 1: my home will be like girls been so long since

434
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:47,440
Speaker 1: I sex, I was like, where you just had it

435
00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:49,120
Speaker 1: last week? Yeah, but I don't really count that, nigga,

436
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:52,119
Speaker 1: you know how you oral is sex? It's oral sex,

437
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:56,240
Speaker 1: and why don't you teach the class? I don't feel

438
00:24:56,240 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 1: like well speaking about teaching, Dick and I I didn't

439
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,200
Speaker 1: funk last night. Oh yes, I really had to stop

440
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,200
Speaker 1: counting because I was. I started addressing my queerness and

441
00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:09,080
Speaker 1: I was like, now that I'm having sex with women,

442
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,159
Speaker 1: I don't I can't keep counting. I don't know what

443
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:20,879
Speaker 1: my number number anymore. You was pretty Dick that I

444
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:25,800
Speaker 1: had to remind you. She was like, right, there was,

445
00:25:26,520 --> 00:25:30,200
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. So I want to get into our horde,

446
00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:32,040
Speaker 1: derv this is where again we're gonna meet you guys.

447
00:25:32,119 --> 00:25:34,240
Speaker 1: One other thing that I would love to be included

448
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:40,600
Speaker 1: in conversations for young people consent, consent, consent, understanding, communication

449
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,480
Speaker 1: and nuances of that. And I think that's part of

450
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:47,399
Speaker 1: why people aren't comfortable with talking about STI status and

451
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:51,000
Speaker 1: what their history is is because they're not sure about

452
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,320
Speaker 1: how to even ask for things that they want. So

453
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:55,800
Speaker 1: then when you're trying to disclose something that is a

454
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:59,359
Speaker 1: difficult conversation, you're even less likely to do so because

455
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 1: you're not even asking for the basic basic things. You know,

456
00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:05,320
Speaker 1: So I agree I think consent in communication need to

457
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:07,719
Speaker 1: be taught so much earlier than they are right now.

458
00:26:07,720 --> 00:26:19,399
Speaker 1: Speaking of consent, we were on a documentary HBO. I

459
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:21,280
Speaker 1: did want to get to our horr derve. This is

460
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 1: where we can teach some people a little something. Uh.

461
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:27,680
Speaker 1: So for the hord Derve, I wanted everyone to give

462
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:31,040
Speaker 1: tips on how to work through having bad sex with

463
00:26:31,119 --> 00:26:34,159
Speaker 1: your partner. I wanted to bring up a quote. Uh,

464
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 1: she's the actor on Little Big Lies. I believe her name. Uh,

465
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:40,400
Speaker 1: let me give her a little white as name, Big

466
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:46,960
Speaker 1: Little Lies, No Something Woodley Shleeen Woodley, a white woman.

467
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:50,480
Speaker 1: But she gave good advice, so I want to share hers,

468
00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:53,080
Speaker 1: she said, wanting to call a good thing off simply

469
00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:56,040
Speaker 1: because your sexual contection isn't a ten yet it is

470
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:59,800
Speaker 1: perhaps the greatest path to growth. Perhaps it is an

471
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:02,600
Speaker 1: invitation to reach into the underbelly of what you are

472
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:06,720
Speaker 1: both afraid to dive into, to explore the roots of emotions, feelings, attachments,

473
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:10,959
Speaker 1: and to play in the world, essentially exploring your partner. Now,

474
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:13,160
Speaker 1: y'all know, if it's bad, that's one of don't count

475
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 1: the dicket. That's what it is. Just forgive before we

476
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:22,440
Speaker 1: give the advice. How many times do you give somebody

477
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,879
Speaker 1: for bad sex before you're done someone you're interest like,

478
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:26,399
Speaker 1: you like, you've had some good days. If I like

479
00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:28,920
Speaker 1: them and they're beautiful and they have a good personality,

480
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 1: are you yeah, how many times you're going out personality

481
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:38,000
Speaker 1: before people a little bit? Yes, had been a bit

482
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:44,119
Speaker 1: aware of me? Okay, So so you'll give someone another

483
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,840
Speaker 1: try in the bedroom if they check off boxes of

484
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:50,760
Speaker 1: other areas. I will because if it's the if I'm

485
00:27:50,760 --> 00:27:53,399
Speaker 1: really dedicated this person three strikes, like, I'm going to

486
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:58,040
Speaker 1: give them three Yeah, but it's really just too you

487
00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 1: got one diersonal and then this at the time and

488
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:03,840
Speaker 1: back up because we should have had conversation before that,

489
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:06,040
Speaker 1: you know, after before the second one. And if you

490
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 1: haven't improved, and I'm also communicating during sex and it's

491
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,960
Speaker 1: not improving, I don't think it's going to get batter

492
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:17,480
Speaker 1: podcast shout Orlando and they said, what is bad dick?

493
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,760
Speaker 1: What is bad? What is bad sex? To you guys?

494
00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:24,199
Speaker 1: To me, it has so much to do. Um and

495
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 1: again on on top of being God's chosen one with

496
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:29,960
Speaker 1: only three day periods, I am also blessed with a

497
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:33,000
Speaker 1: plethora of great dicks in my life, but I think

498
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:36,920
Speaker 1: it truly does have to do to me it is i'm, I'm,

499
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,120
Speaker 1: I know now it has nothing really even to do

500
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:41,520
Speaker 1: it size and length and girt. It has so much

501
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:44,200
Speaker 1: to do with the chemistry. And and to me, there's

502
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:47,680
Speaker 1: something called a sex language. And so the way in

503
00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:50,480
Speaker 1: which I like rounds. I have a partner that can

504
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 1: go around, and I know that even someone who only

505
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:56,080
Speaker 1: goes once and is done, that's not someone that speaks

506
00:28:56,080 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 1: the same language. I like to keep going. I like

507
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,880
Speaker 1: to explore each other in different ways. And so I

508
00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:05,400
Speaker 1: think I think, to me, bad dick, Which it's not dick,

509
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 1: it's the sex that's bad. It's more of just the

510
00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:12,800
Speaker 1: sexual chemistry. Pop had bad big dick. Yeah, yeah, big,

511
00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:15,120
Speaker 1: I don't know what he's doing in there. Hurt and

512
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 1: now it is big. And because you're gonna say, is

513
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 1: always when it hurts, you know why, because they're so

514
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 1: big as well, the friction there if you're not extremely

515
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:28,040
Speaker 1: wet or lube isn't brought in. Yeah, it's a mean though.

516
00:29:28,120 --> 00:29:30,600
Speaker 1: You have to waken it up, you know, you can't

517
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 1: just shove it in there. And if that person isn't

518
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:36,120
Speaker 1: patient and know their own body to then communicate about

519
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:39,120
Speaker 1: how your body is because each servic is different. Dicks

520
00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:47,720
Speaker 1: should know. But that's the thing they're looking at. Porne

521
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:52,680
Speaker 1: is not a good educators to classes or workshop but

522
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 1: don't they But that's the thing too as women, like, yes,

523
00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 1: we can hope that men are going to come and

524
00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:01,240
Speaker 1: lay it then down all time, but I think that

525
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 1: outside of us always wanting to please our partners, we

526
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:07,320
Speaker 1: do have to be real and yes it may hurt

527
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,520
Speaker 1: their ego, but as women, we need to tell things

528
00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 1: that are painful, are uncomfortable with, things that we don't enjoy,

529
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 1: because even that's where all these things be down here,

530
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,640
Speaker 1: like biting the coach. Yes, you got to tell them no,

531
00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 1: that's not right. Yes for you, that may be somebody

532
00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:24,719
Speaker 1: else's jam, but that's not your jam, and you have

533
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 1: to communicate that to them. Do you find that you

534
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 1: do normally do what the last person liked, because I

535
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:32,800
Speaker 1: definitely do. It depends. Sometimes I like to kind of

536
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,320
Speaker 1: see what their moves are, you know, like how they

537
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:37,280
Speaker 1: throw it down and I don't. I'm not too vocal

538
00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 1: unless I'm like, no, that's a hard no, stop, don't

539
00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 1: do that. That's not pleasurable at all. But I'll just

540
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:44,800
Speaker 1: let the flow of it organically happen. I'll definitely pull

541
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 1: out tricks out of my toolbag that I use. The

542
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 1: bag is a segment, So yeah, go with tis. What

543
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,120
Speaker 1: is that? What is that your favorite? So the first

544
00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:59,800
Speaker 1: thing I would say is that what is their love language?

545
00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:02,160
Speaker 1: How do they like to give and receive love? Is

546
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:05,400
Speaker 1: probably the first step because four play is so important.

547
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:08,479
Speaker 1: And so if someone is more physical, or they need gifts,

548
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:14,880
Speaker 1: or they need, you know, access service exactly. It could

549
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: be massaging your feet, it can be rubbing you. It

550
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,000
Speaker 1: could be bringing you a cup of coffee or a

551
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: glass of wine. Rolling my joint is always an active

552
00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:26,000
Speaker 1: service that I might joint. So you're right, I'm not

553
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 1: gonna lie that used to the last na. I love

554
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:31,680
Speaker 1: that he would even send me all my way with

555
00:31:31,720 --> 00:31:39,080
Speaker 1: a blunt yank exactly, sere foot and weed. I'm a

556
00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:41,640
Speaker 1: hope for you. Got me? If you're feeding me and

557
00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:47,200
Speaker 1: you keep it behind, I'm your girl, Yes, your girl?

558
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:54,800
Speaker 1: What's your need? Let me take care of you? What

559
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 1: I do like? Second dick after nice? Yeah, not like

560
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:01,760
Speaker 1: you'd be on throwing up on dick. You don't even

561
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:04,360
Speaker 1: love the food just before you, dude, I'm telling you

562
00:32:05,040 --> 00:32:06,800
Speaker 1: when I take it into a nice mesh time, like

563
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 1: I wasn't handle sex season. That's probably why you don't

564
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:15,840
Speaker 1: have anal sex didn't like to give really wanted to

565
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:17,960
Speaker 1: sunk me in the like seven course meal. And I

566
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:21,000
Speaker 1: just tried to keep making Mexican food, not even like

567
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:23,640
Speaker 1: the Mexican food was something that like really was gonna

568
00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:26,040
Speaker 1: make me ship, just the connotation of Mexican. I'd make

569
00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 1: let us tacos and be like, we can't it was Mexican. Well,

570
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 1: clearly wrong. I don't know if you know diet. She

571
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:34,400
Speaker 1: came on the show, Yes I Love Diane and put

572
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:40,320
Speaker 1: salt in her ass so is like, technically there was

573
00:32:40,360 --> 00:32:43,040
Speaker 1: sausa in her assholes. So sausa shidn't scare you away

574
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 1: from antal sexy. But she would not recommend that for

575
00:32:45,880 --> 00:32:49,720
Speaker 1: those out there, I'd start with the sa when she

576
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 1: told that story was mild, I try to like stop

577
00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:59,320
Speaker 1: my face just with the salat none of day. Maybe

578
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 1: maybe it's Zeke that seems like a mom to Zeke sauce,

579
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:05,520
Speaker 1: because that's deal that seemed a little friend. It's yogurt,

580
00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:09,240
Speaker 1: like they already tell you. That's what I was just

581
00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:12,240
Speaker 1: gonna say. It's a profile, I mean, and then if

582
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:14,800
Speaker 1: it comes out of your asking it looked like, hey,

583
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 1: I love it, everybody. Yeah, okay, So back to Zeki

584
00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 1: on the taint? What can we call this Taziki on

585
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:27,440
Speaker 1: the taint? Bro? You know how funny man on my

586
00:33:27,520 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 1: businesship lately dog because COVID really birthed me trying to

587
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 1: figure out different ways to make money. Zeki to zeke?

588
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 1: What's the good name? Apparently we ain't need to saying

589
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 1: it right? For real? For real? I said tauziki somewhere

590
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: and apparently that ain't you stop it? How do you

591
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: say taziki? Nah? Like I think over overseas it's zeky

592
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:53,960
Speaker 1: szeki or something like right now tazek pronunciation here we go, Yeah,

593
00:33:53,960 --> 00:34:01,840
Speaker 1: all up, we are? How are you using just say

594
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:06,040
Speaker 1: the ship East Europe's cuisine in the Middle East, in

595
00:34:06,160 --> 00:34:09,719
Speaker 1: Turkey and reaching particular, for example, made from mainly you're

596
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:12,839
Speaker 1: good with cucumbers, garlic, salt, olive oil, and you can

597
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:18,080
Speaker 1: add a dash of vinegaro squeeze issues. But how do

598
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:21,640
Speaker 1: you actually pronounce the name of this dish that z

599
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:27,880
Speaker 1: told you that zeky American ship the same way, we

600
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:30,920
Speaker 1: just be sucking everything. I just wanted to compensate twenty

601
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:35,239
Speaker 1: seven seconds. Yeah, it's like just go to the second.

602
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:39,239
Speaker 1: But see, like Americans don't be saying ship right, but

603
00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:41,440
Speaker 1: I got I got confronted about it like two weeks ago.

604
00:34:41,520 --> 00:34:45,359
Speaker 1: Just said confronted, come fronted, because nobody lets me live

605
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,279
Speaker 1: for ship. I do like to check people when they

606
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:49,759
Speaker 1: say ship wrong, because it'd be fine. And even if,

607
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 1: as someone said the other day, they wanted gyoza in

608
00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:57,279
Speaker 1: front of me, what is that wings? I said, you

609
00:34:57,320 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 1: are being a real nigger right now there because you've

610
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:04,400
Speaker 1: Japanese right, don't It's okay, give me the case of

611
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 1: dilla and we'll go. It will go. I didn't want to.

612
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 1: I didn't want to finish because you are drawing a

613
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:14,160
Speaker 1: line that I don't think we've ever even done with

614
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:18,279
Speaker 1: the love languages and how that translates. So what is

615
00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 1: the gift giving? Yeah, so I love toys are great gifts. Um.

616
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 1: So I mean it depends on what that person enjoys.

617
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:28,239
Speaker 1: I would tailor it to like what they love. Um.

618
00:35:28,239 --> 00:35:33,839
Speaker 1: But there's I mean flowers, roses, chocolates in the bedroom yeah,

619
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 1: like fruit. I love being fed in the bedroom and

620
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 1: like that's part of my for play or like we

621
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:43,640
Speaker 1: were taking a bath together. You are, what kind of

622
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:46,640
Speaker 1: food do you like? Berries? Berries are always a go

623
00:35:46,760 --> 00:35:52,080
Speaker 1: to sey Yeah. And and also you can feed someone

624
00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:54,920
Speaker 1: easily in one bite because that's also the and then

625
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,640
Speaker 1: you can stuck it in a drips exactly. Yeah, but

626
00:35:57,960 --> 00:36:01,120
Speaker 1: can you really got a change the sheets, because now

627
00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:05,160
Speaker 1: you got dripped juices. I wanted to let it be dry.

628
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 1: Maybe it's some hotel ship. Honestly, that some hotel ship.

629
00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:11,400
Speaker 1: If I get to the point where like whenever my

630
00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:15,719
Speaker 1: feet are out, it's some hotel ship. I was like, hotel,

631
00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 1: but hotel? Yeah? Did that that sound like two words?

632
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 1: You tell little? I'm like, what do you say? Fucking god? Dog?

633
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:36,680
Speaker 1: You put a pause in there, Okay, I know, said

634
00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:44,880
Speaker 1: bandy Damn. I also love toys. Toys, I love bringing

635
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:46,920
Speaker 1: to the bedroom, no matter what the gender of my

636
00:36:46,960 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 1: partner is. Anyway, I was saying, because we know you

637
00:36:56,280 --> 00:37:04,799
Speaker 1: fetches all love to interrupt. I saw you noticed to know,

638
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 1: Sorry that's today. Then you know when someone saying still

639
00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:17,160
Speaker 1: talk let the girls, it's all like a city and interesting.

640
00:37:17,239 --> 00:37:22,880
Speaker 1: I can't Okay, I'm sorry. Berries berries were back to

641
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:30,319
Speaker 1: berries and toy gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, donations. I will

642
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:34,240
Speaker 1: always take a donation, yes, um, but toys are amazing.

643
00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:38,040
Speaker 1: Cocker rings are great. There's vibrating cocker rings. Um. There's

644
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:42,560
Speaker 1: also different wanes and pugegitive toys. Um, so I always want.

645
00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:46,000
Speaker 1: Are you talking about like the electro ones. Yeah, not

646
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 1: not for electro play, but the like ha Tachi one

647
00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:51,839
Speaker 1: where it has Yeah, those that those style of one

648
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:56,080
Speaker 1: um toys is so big. That was the first sex

649
00:37:56,160 --> 00:37:58,719
Speaker 1: toy that I actually was introduced to by the nig

650
00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:01,239
Speaker 1: Go piss on trying to make me squirt, and we

651
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:05,200
Speaker 1: went to the sex toy shot together. Literally it was

652
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 1: this I don't know because I don't like that any anymore,

653
00:38:09,080 --> 00:38:20,279
Speaker 1: Ildo the Golden Boy. There we go. You know what,

654
00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:23,680
Speaker 1: let's okay. We didn't even have tips. Damn it. If

655
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:25,960
Speaker 1: your partner's bad, he has two strikes and he's out,

656
00:38:26,719 --> 00:38:28,839
Speaker 1: but the third one he gotta go. But you can't

657
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:31,920
Speaker 1: blame him. You did not communicate your pleasures, your desires.

658
00:38:31,920 --> 00:38:37,719
Speaker 1: Please be empowered for yourself and want are so we

659
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:41,080
Speaker 1: are going to get into our horrible decision for today.

660
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:44,400
Speaker 1: And it's crazy because, as a lot of you guys know,

661
00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:47,799
Speaker 1: we did a whole episode on hedonism, but that was

662
00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:51,919
Speaker 1: on the Hidden Hedonism Resort in Jamaica. We've never really

663
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:55,480
Speaker 1: talked about even that word and what it means. And um,

664
00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:58,080
Speaker 1: so I looked in to the definition, but I don't

665
00:38:58,120 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 1: want to just read the definition because I think I've

666
00:39:00,560 --> 00:39:06,360
Speaker 1: done enough reading for today. But what to you symbolizes

667
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:09,839
Speaker 1: and what is your definition of heathenism? Yes, so I

668
00:39:09,719 --> 00:39:13,520
Speaker 1: identify as a conscious hedonist, and so for me, that's

669
00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:17,280
Speaker 1: just like anything that someone can consent and opt into.

670
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:20,719
Speaker 1: So having complete informed consent, knowing all the risks and

671
00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:24,080
Speaker 1: rewards before opting into it, and then once you know

672
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 1: all the risk and rewards, diving in deep to all

673
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,120
Speaker 1: the pleasure available. Do you really feel like you will

674
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:33,040
Speaker 1: always know, like all of the pleasures and desires of

675
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:35,560
Speaker 1: your partner. Is that possible? Have you reached that? I

676
00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:39,080
Speaker 1: feel like a certain partners I had. Yeah, not currently

677
00:39:39,080 --> 00:39:42,160
Speaker 1: because I'm not really see anyone regularly. I'm very solo

678
00:39:42,280 --> 00:39:45,440
Speaker 1: Polly at the moment um, but in the past, so

679
00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:50,120
Speaker 1: solo Polly is just the type of pollicuele. I do

680
00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 1: identify as a unicorn. But that's some scientific I'm glad

681
00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:01,360
Speaker 1: I didn't smoke before. Okay, he was like, your polycule

682
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 1: is basically whatever kind of Polly shape you're in. So

683
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:07,279
Speaker 1: if you're in a triad or if you're in you know,

684
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:12,680
Speaker 1: different configurations, like there's v V or z f V

685
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:18,280
Speaker 1: is usually two people that are dating one person, yeah,

686
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 1: the five, as opposed to a triad where it's like

687
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:26,160
Speaker 1: all connected, so you have all the people are interacting.

688
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:29,920
Speaker 1: These people are not interacting. And guess what, y'all geometry

689
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:31,880
Speaker 1: is math and that is the ship that I know.

690
00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:38,040
Speaker 1: Isn't geometry is math? Yes, just don't for me, Like

691
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 1: I understood everything she just said, but shut up, all right,

692
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:51,000
Speaker 1: So your polycules are aligned? Um, okay, so polo poly

693
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:55,560
Speaker 1: so you're just fluidly dating. Yes, I'm I still identify

694
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:59,239
Speaker 1: as Polly, but I'm not in a hierarchical relationship right now.

695
00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:03,760
Speaker 1: And so some people may classify the anarchical um polyamory

696
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:07,040
Speaker 1: where they kind of just have whatever the agreements are

697
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:09,719
Speaker 1: between those people and then that's what they go by.

698
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:12,280
Speaker 1: They don't really have a labor. I am a unicorn

699
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:19,239
Speaker 1: because I'm a pan sexual ciss woman. I thought a

700
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:22,520
Speaker 1: unicorn was someone that's sup with couples. Yes, but you

701
00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:26,560
Speaker 1: just said sleep with couples as well. It's a single

702
00:41:26,560 --> 00:41:28,719
Speaker 1: woman that leaves a couple of y right, or single person.

703
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:32,080
Speaker 1: I guess my person Yeah, usually assists woman like a

704
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 1: woman that was born a woman and identifies as well.

705
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:38,879
Speaker 1: You said you are a unicorn because you're a pan sexual. Yes,

706
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 1: because I I have SUP with couples. I love couples,

707
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:45,359
Speaker 1: but I also have been very wary of couples. Um.

708
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 1: I was also married, and so I know what it

709
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,480
Speaker 1: was like to be on the other side of that

710
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:54,759
Speaker 1: to bring in a unicorn. And so because of that experience,

711
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,520
Speaker 1: I also know as unicorn what I how I want

712
00:41:57,520 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 1: to approach a couple and know what they're dying if

713
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:05,080
Speaker 1: dynamic is before I get involved. You are I'm thirty one.

714
00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:08,000
Speaker 1: Do you feel like at what age were you when

715
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:12,520
Speaker 1: you understood the different I would even say, like brackets

716
00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:14,640
Speaker 1: you fit into because you're still very young to just

717
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:17,800
Speaker 1: speak on sex, even in the manner that you're speaking. Oh,

718
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:20,600
Speaker 1: thank you, because I thought you were younger. I think

719
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:25,040
Speaker 1: you care a girl. You want to explained it, okay

720
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:27,200
Speaker 1: a little bit, but no, like I was some third

721
00:42:27,239 --> 00:42:35,799
Speaker 1: and now a young spring chicken until March, well not

722
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:42,000
Speaker 1: yet know, Like what age do you, like when did

723
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:43,839
Speaker 1: you really start to know and learn? Right? Like when

724
00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 1: I started this show, I was like, I'm bisexual. Now

725
00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:49,319
Speaker 1: I'm like my queer my pants? Like what am I? Yes?

726
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 1: How long do you feel? At what age? I'm probably

727
00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:56,520
Speaker 1: middle school? And I was watching Real Sex and you

728
00:42:56,560 --> 00:43:00,480
Speaker 1: were saying pants this queen. So using that language, I'm

729
00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:03,920
Speaker 1: so sorry. I thought you meant understanding my sexuality and identity. Sorry, No,

730
00:43:04,120 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 1: using that language is probably in the last year or two,

731
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 1: specifically for like very gender normative and non normative language,

732
00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:15,440
Speaker 1: like using ciss or a fab a map because I

733
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:19,040
Speaker 1: want to be fab a map assigned female at birth

734
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 1: or assigned male at birth, and so that I assigned

735
00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:24,200
Speaker 1: male and female. But I just never heard of it

736
00:43:24,239 --> 00:43:26,319
Speaker 1: in that way. Yeah, it's just the short term of it.

737
00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:28,920
Speaker 1: Like cutie pok is like queer trans people of color,

738
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:34,680
Speaker 1: Like they come up with acronym. Yeah, yeah, so we're

739
00:43:34,719 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 1: cutie pox, we're queer. People of color were also bipox. Yeah,

740
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:46,000
Speaker 1: we're also BIPO. Yes, we are black. Indigenous people of

741
00:43:46,000 --> 00:43:49,120
Speaker 1: color were also under that flag. So yeah, it depends

742
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:52,080
Speaker 1: on what flag. You went away really quick for the culture.

743
00:43:52,719 --> 00:43:55,680
Speaker 1: Go through all of your acronyms. If you can't name

744
00:43:55,719 --> 00:43:58,359
Speaker 1: as many as you think you're acronyms. But just like

745
00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:02,600
Speaker 1: things are identified which sexually as far as your gender, yes, okay,

746
00:44:02,719 --> 00:44:09,040
Speaker 1: I would say I am a pan Safio sexual that

747
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:17,799
Speaker 1: is a CIS black woman. Uh BYEPOC bye doing BYPOC,

748
00:44:17,920 --> 00:44:30,239
Speaker 1: sex work act, vocacy and polyamory relationship, but also solo Polly.

749
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:36,960
Speaker 1: I was just like, and then Panna queen, Oh damn, yeah,

750
00:44:37,160 --> 00:44:44,799
Speaker 1: I'm just had a long fight. I got back from

751
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:46,520
Speaker 1: Hawaiian some when I sat next to you asked me

752
00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 1: what I do for living and normally all and tell

753
00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 1: people to selling work entertainment. I had taken an ambient

754
00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:56,040
Speaker 1: before the flight, and I was like podcast, goddamn motherfucker's

755
00:44:56,080 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 1: nick alf. I mean until I fell asleep, but I

756
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:01,000
Speaker 1: was like, I was just X podcast. We talked about

757
00:45:01,040 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 1: talking and staff and really I was like, yeah, he's like,

758
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: so you like talk to people that like identifies all

759
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:09,799
Speaker 1: the stuff they know it sist means in um like yeah,

760
00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:11,600
Speaker 1: stuff like that. But like you know the ones in blue,

761
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:16,239
Speaker 1: we get somebody like that two days lighter, Hey five five?

762
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,480
Speaker 1: You know why? Um? You know we're making um light

763
00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:23,279
Speaker 1: of it. And honestly, these terms are really near and

764
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 1: dear to people who haven't been able to feel comfortable

765
00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:30,680
Speaker 1: and the gender they were assigned, and if they feel nonconforming,

766
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 1: I'm all for it. I like, you know, I think

767
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:38,560
Speaker 1: it's dope that we have so many different genders or none. Really, yes, absolutely.

768
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:42,040
Speaker 1: I mean language is a patriarchical system, and so because

769
00:45:42,040 --> 00:45:44,680
Speaker 1: of that, there's very limited language for a lot of

770
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:47,480
Speaker 1: marginalized groups, and so a lot of these terms are

771
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:51,120
Speaker 1: new because people didn't have labels for these things. They

772
00:45:51,120 --> 00:45:53,839
Speaker 1: didn't know how to identify. And that's why I tried

773
00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:57,440
Speaker 1: to stress using the labels in my everyday language. But

774
00:45:57,480 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 1: also when people are like, oh, I have to learn

775
00:45:59,160 --> 00:46:02,760
Speaker 1: a new term, yes you do, do that work because

776
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:06,120
Speaker 1: that is now giving that person that's in that marginalized

777
00:46:06,160 --> 00:46:09,440
Speaker 1: group their identity. It's reaffirming who they are, that you

778
00:46:09,520 --> 00:46:12,200
Speaker 1: believe in what they're doing. And I think that's so

779
00:46:12,280 --> 00:46:15,719
Speaker 1: important because there's so many other people that glaze over them,

780
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 1: that cause harm, and so we have to elipt those

781
00:46:18,680 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 1: that are most marginalized or else we'll never none of

782
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:24,520
Speaker 1: us are going to be safe. Yeah, what are your pronouns?

783
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:27,959
Speaker 1: She her, Yes, I'm an assist. I'm like, I'm a woman,

784
00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:30,279
Speaker 1: A born, a woman, love my woman. That's like I

785
00:46:30,360 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 1: have my masculinity, Like my dom persona is actually very masculine.

786
00:46:35,360 --> 00:46:37,160
Speaker 1: And so that's where I get kind of like my

787
00:46:37,239 --> 00:46:41,040
Speaker 1: sadism out. I lose my respectability politics. I don't feel

788
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:43,239
Speaker 1: like I have to be the proper black girl that

789
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:45,960
Speaker 1: says all the right things and does. I'm like, no,

790
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 1: you are my pet. I own you. We you know,

791
00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:51,680
Speaker 1: negotiate with the scene is and then from there, I

792
00:46:51,719 --> 00:47:00,640
Speaker 1: am a nurturing sadist. So okay to hug you after

793
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 1: she beat your exactly? Yes, yes, right, I'll tell you

794
00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:10,839
Speaker 1: what a good boy you were the entire time. I

795
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:13,880
Speaker 1: do want you to actually share a story with us

796
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:17,759
Speaker 1: if you can't look quick. So when I met when

797
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:19,759
Speaker 1: I when I first met her, it was it wasn't

798
00:47:19,760 --> 00:47:21,920
Speaker 1: for your twenty nine for three year, it was for

799
00:47:21,960 --> 00:47:24,880
Speaker 1: her thirties and you were with your partners. Yes, And

800
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 1: I met him, um and I guess we were drinks

801
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 1: for flowing, and she was like, you won't believe what

802
00:47:30,719 --> 00:47:33,719
Speaker 1: I just got to do. For my birthday and I'm

803
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:36,240
Speaker 1: gonna not even introduce it. I want you to share

804
00:47:36,680 --> 00:47:40,719
Speaker 1: with Wheezy because I know the story and our whole

805
00:47:40,719 --> 00:47:44,520
Speaker 1: confession that I would love for you in a while.

806
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:46,520
Speaker 1: That'd be fun. I would love for you to share.

807
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 1: Make it law name drawn out, but but also talk

808
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 1: start to wear. You had the conversation with your partner

809
00:47:54,160 --> 00:47:56,120
Speaker 1: that this is what you wanted to do, Explain what

810
00:47:56,160 --> 00:48:05,080
Speaker 1: it was, and uh, I want to put a condom

811
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:09,840
Speaker 1: on that any pointed out, Oh yes, I was not

812
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:13,480
Speaker 1: watching um So for my thirtieth birthday, it's it's a

813
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:16,759
Speaker 1: big mark, I feel like for any person, and so

814
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:19,680
Speaker 1: I wanted to do something that kind of spoke to

815
00:48:19,719 --> 00:48:22,080
Speaker 1: who I was, where I come from, and my sexual

816
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:25,640
Speaker 1: sex positivity journey and my poly journey. And it wasn't

817
00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:28,839
Speaker 1: until a dear friend of mine named Lila was like, well,

818
00:48:28,880 --> 00:48:30,839
Speaker 1: what do you want? You've kind of told me like

819
00:48:30,880 --> 00:48:32,560
Speaker 1: so and so said you should do this, and so

820
00:48:32,600 --> 00:48:34,160
Speaker 1: and so said you should do that, but what do

821
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:36,799
Speaker 1: you actually want to do? And I took a moment,

822
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:39,440
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't even know what do I want?

823
00:48:39,760 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 1: And so when I took that time to be like okay,

824
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:44,960
Speaker 1: what do How do I want to curate my birthday

825
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:47,400
Speaker 1: from start to end and the journey I want to

826
00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:50,840
Speaker 1: take my guests on along with me. I then proposed

827
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:54,480
Speaker 1: that to my partner, Um, and we can call him

828
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:58,759
Speaker 1: orian Um for the sake of privacy, Um, and so

829
00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:08,239
Speaker 1: I yeah, like the bell exactly, and I know he's

830
00:49:08,280 --> 00:49:14,080
Speaker 1: a very magical person, so um so UM. I basically

831
00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:15,920
Speaker 1: said to him, you know what I would love to

832
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:20,200
Speaker 1: do is have a love feast when everyone arrives. And

833
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:23,440
Speaker 1: so a love feast is where you can't feed yourself.

834
00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:26,359
Speaker 1: Everybody has to feed you. And I wanted it to

835
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:30,520
Speaker 1: have start with sushi, me covered in sushi, completely naked,

836
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:33,880
Speaker 1: and everybody eating the sushi off of my body. And

837
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 1: they had to ask for what they want, because that

838
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:38,600
Speaker 1: was the theme of the entire night, was asked for

839
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:41,560
Speaker 1: what you want. And so as guests arrived, they were

840
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:44,680
Speaker 1: told the instructions of they couldn't feed themselves. And I

841
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:47,399
Speaker 1: had the soy sauce in a bowl right in my pussy,

842
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:50,040
Speaker 1: and so they had to like dip the sushi in

843
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:52,520
Speaker 1: the in my pussy to then feed each other. And

844
00:49:52,560 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 1: I'm watching all of this happen over me. Um, I

845
00:49:57,200 --> 00:50:00,959
Speaker 1: had sixty people there. What of it? I know, yes,

846
00:50:02,520 --> 00:50:05,760
Speaker 1: how many pieces? I had ordered a lot of SUSI

847
00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:17,359
Speaker 1: I I feel like I think about six. I made

848
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:20,880
Speaker 1: sure it was. I was like rolls Shashini like I

849
00:50:20,920 --> 00:50:31,879
Speaker 1: had yeah, but you yeah, I can't eat anymore. Yeah. Well,

850
00:50:31,920 --> 00:50:34,920
Speaker 1: after everyone had their fill, I then went upstairs and

851
00:50:34,960 --> 00:50:37,399
Speaker 1: I showered, and everybody just kind of had like their

852
00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:40,200
Speaker 1: cocktail hour waiting for me to come back. And then

853
00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:43,279
Speaker 1: when I returned, we then did a series of intimacy

854
00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:47,000
Speaker 1: games that my friend Lila hosted, where basically because everyone

855
00:50:47,040 --> 00:50:50,280
Speaker 1: either came solo or as a polycuel or with a couple.

856
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:52,360
Speaker 1: So I wanted to break all of that up. I

857
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:54,680
Speaker 1: hate when I go to a party and everybody's clustered

858
00:50:54,719 --> 00:50:56,560
Speaker 1: around each other. You only hang out with the people

859
00:50:56,600 --> 00:50:58,719
Speaker 1: that you know, and so I wanted to get rid

860
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 1: of all of that. And the intimacy games made everybody

861
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:04,960
Speaker 1: do eye gazing and engage with each other. We did

862
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:07,359
Speaker 1: gazing so uncomfortable for me. I can't do it. It is,

863
00:51:07,480 --> 00:51:12,120
Speaker 1: but that's part of breaking down those walls and know

864
00:51:12,280 --> 00:51:13,440
Speaker 1: Alex and I had to do it for this kid.

865
00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:18,320
Speaker 1: I couldn't do it. Was like We then had everyone

866
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:21,800
Speaker 1: um do do kind of like a like a congoline

867
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:24,239
Speaker 1: kind of style, and then you had to go through

868
00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:27,800
Speaker 1: and ask for how you wanted people to touch you,

869
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:30,640
Speaker 1: and so you could say like just below my neck

870
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:33,879
Speaker 1: or just my face or only my ass, and so

871
00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,560
Speaker 1: everybody got to go through the line asking for what

872
00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:39,799
Speaker 1: they wanted and how they wanted the room get my face.

873
00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:48,320
Speaker 1: Everybody was pretty much like touch me wherever, so like,

874
00:51:47,840 --> 00:51:58,040
Speaker 1: I don't exactly and then and so the video but me,

875
00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:00,560
Speaker 1: I got to go twice and then people it kissed me. Oh,

876
00:52:00,560 --> 00:52:03,000
Speaker 1: when you're blindfolded while you're going through the line, that's

877
00:52:03,040 --> 00:52:05,600
Speaker 1: also the key. So you're going through this and having

878
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 1: people touch you and interact with you, and you're completely blindfolded,

879
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:12,120
Speaker 1: and so that's the other part of the antony games.

880
00:52:12,239 --> 00:52:14,200
Speaker 1: And then to kind of get people, So that was

881
00:52:14,239 --> 00:52:16,320
Speaker 1: to mix up the clusters and mix up the group,

882
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:19,400
Speaker 1: and then to get everybody kind of winding down and

883
00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 1: taking off layers of clothes. We then did partnered massages

884
00:52:23,360 --> 00:52:27,680
Speaker 1: that my partner Ryan led everyone. How long is the party?

885
00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:30,080
Speaker 1: It was? It was all night. This is just the

886
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:36,360
Speaker 1: warm up actually really because outside of the naked sushi

887
00:52:36,440 --> 00:52:39,080
Speaker 1: part there's another part to this. And I was like,

888
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 1: and mind you when when she told me about this party,

889
00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:43,239
Speaker 1: he was standing right next to her and I was like,

890
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:45,879
Speaker 1: you was cool and on this and he said yes,

891
00:52:46,360 --> 00:52:53,879
Speaker 1: she was happiest I've ever seen, like literally he's black. Yeah,

892
00:52:56,239 --> 00:53:01,440
Speaker 1: not together no more. And pretty was allowed to stay

893
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:04,560
Speaker 1: with me the rest of the night home and was

894
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:15,200
Speaker 1: like one. I was like, amazing, it was funny. Um So,

895
00:53:15,360 --> 00:53:19,960
Speaker 1: then after the NBC games and massages, then the kind

896
00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:22,279
Speaker 1: of the final part of the night that I was

897
00:53:22,360 --> 00:53:27,439
Speaker 1: really looking forward to, and that's essentially being yes, you're laughing. Yeah.

898
00:53:27,480 --> 00:53:29,239
Speaker 1: I was like, are you thinking about that time? He came,

899
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:48,360
Speaker 1: I'm just laughing and I'm sorry, I know. This is

900
00:53:48,880 --> 00:53:53,120
Speaker 1: like all my dreams come true. Amazing. Um So, then

901
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:57,160
Speaker 1: basically I was striped naked and then I was laid

902
00:53:57,200 --> 00:54:01,120
Speaker 1: down on my stomach to a spanking bench essentially, and

903
00:54:01,239 --> 00:54:04,200
Speaker 1: my partner Ryan was in front of me. He put

904
00:54:04,239 --> 00:54:06,360
Speaker 1: his cock in his in my mouth, and then I

905
00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:08,680
Speaker 1: had another one of my friends who was like stroking

906
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:12,080
Speaker 1: my head and petting me, and then everyone was then

907
00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:16,120
Speaker 1: invited to penetrate me with either their fingers, dildo, or

908
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:19,880
Speaker 1: cock and they all had. They all had two minutes

909
00:54:20,200 --> 00:54:23,680
Speaker 1: um to be able to penetrate me. So we were

910
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:26,240
Speaker 1: able to get to I wanted to get to thirty

911
00:54:26,239 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 1: because I was turning thirty, but we were only able

912
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:30,399
Speaker 1: to get to twenty two because at that time other

913
00:54:30,440 --> 00:54:35,120
Speaker 1: people started playing um so, so they were all fucking

914
00:54:35,239 --> 00:54:38,160
Speaker 1: and I had your blindfolds on. My blindfold was on.

915
00:54:38,280 --> 00:54:41,319
Speaker 1: I was blindfolded, gagged, and all I could only hear

916
00:54:41,480 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 1: basically everything else was like deprived. And that was the

917
00:54:44,680 --> 00:54:51,080
Speaker 1: fantasy coming in a few weeks. So I begain like,

918
00:54:51,200 --> 00:54:53,480
Speaker 1: I just want to slow this down and reiterate what

919
00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:57,279
Speaker 1: we're going on. So you were bent over, uh what

920
00:54:57,440 --> 00:55:01,160
Speaker 1: was it a spanking bench? Spaking bench? Your partner was

921
00:55:01,200 --> 00:55:04,040
Speaker 1: in front of you, so he was the only person

922
00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:06,719
Speaker 1: like sucking my mouth. Yeah, he was sucking your mouth,

923
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:10,280
Speaker 1: and the just whoever whoever in the room. All sixty

924
00:55:10,280 --> 00:55:13,560
Speaker 1: guests there had permission. They did not have to ask

925
00:55:13,600 --> 00:55:15,560
Speaker 1: me or say anything. They just had to sign up.

926
00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 1: I had another friend who was basically the ringleader. It's

927
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:22,200
Speaker 1: like a sheet, yeah, basically a sheet that they can

928
00:55:22,280 --> 00:55:24,560
Speaker 1: sign up for and then they get two minutes to

929
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:29,400
Speaker 1: penetrate me. And so we had people doing. Wait, bro,

930
00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:33,239
Speaker 1: what that I want you guys to tell me the

931
00:55:33,320 --> 00:55:35,520
Speaker 1: last sign up sheet you've seen, because mine was an

932
00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:39,440
Speaker 1: extermination sign up and always I ain't gonna hold you.

933
00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:42,880
Speaker 1: It wasn't a train bank. I wanted to all of

934
00:55:42,920 --> 00:55:45,000
Speaker 1: the restaurants, make you sign up now, Bro, you gotta

935
00:55:45,000 --> 00:55:47,880
Speaker 1: put your name, phone number, you know what I mean.

936
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:50,160
Speaker 1: So that's a lot of sign up she's now, but

937
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:53,520
Speaker 1: I don't. I never know of anyone to have a

938
00:55:53,560 --> 00:55:58,479
Speaker 1: sign up sheet. You drink and do drugs or none.

939
00:55:58,600 --> 00:56:02,120
Speaker 1: I love drugs, not much drinking. I'm not really. My

940
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:05,640
Speaker 1: metabolism for alcohol is very low. We're the same. Yeah,

941
00:56:06,239 --> 00:56:09,359
Speaker 1: I love, I loved. Were you sober this night? Did

942
00:56:09,360 --> 00:56:12,320
Speaker 1: you want to remember it? Did you want to? One percent?

943
00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:15,960
Speaker 1: Wanted to remember it? Was? I smoke cannabis pretty regularly.

944
00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:18,400
Speaker 1: I consider it just like my medicine, even though I

945
00:56:18,400 --> 00:56:21,240
Speaker 1: don't have a medical license. UM, So I don't consider

946
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 1: that me getting high. That's kind of my baseline. Um

947
00:56:24,719 --> 00:56:27,040
Speaker 1: But I wasn't on any other substances that night, and

948
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:29,319
Speaker 1: I think I maybe had a glass of prosecco, but

949
00:56:29,360 --> 00:56:31,879
Speaker 1: I've done all the other drugs. Let me just put

950
00:56:31,960 --> 00:56:35,560
Speaker 1: that out there. When you said, I knew friend, I wanna,

951
00:56:35,719 --> 00:56:37,680
Speaker 1: I wanna. I do want to end on this with

952
00:56:38,080 --> 00:56:40,319
Speaker 1: just because I think a huge part of not only

953
00:56:40,360 --> 00:56:42,920
Speaker 1: your sexual liberation with yourself, it does have to do

954
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:47,239
Speaker 1: with that communication. So what was the conversation when you

955
00:56:47,320 --> 00:56:49,520
Speaker 1: asked and told your partner this is what you wanted.

956
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:52,560
Speaker 1: And a lot of women fear that they may be

957
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:56,200
Speaker 1: treated or looked at differently after, So what was the

958
00:56:56,200 --> 00:56:59,640
Speaker 1: conversation like after and then well, you know, let you

959
00:56:59,719 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 1: sighn off, But I want to know those two what

960
00:57:02,239 --> 00:57:04,919
Speaker 1: those two conversations. It was starting with just being clear

961
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:08,040
Speaker 1: about my fantasy was to be fucked by a series

962
00:57:08,040 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 1: of strangers, but the reality of that is very risk,

963
00:57:13,320 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 1: high risk, and so I that's not within my risk profile. UM.

964
00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 1: So because of that, I wanted to create a similar

965
00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:25,400
Speaker 1: situation where I could get the feeling of being penetrated

966
00:57:25,400 --> 00:57:30,960
Speaker 1: by strangers and having that kind of like being objectified essentially. Um.

967
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:33,320
Speaker 1: And so when I explained that to him, he was

968
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:39,280
Speaker 1: extremely sex positive. Everyone that we invited, and Black she

969
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:41,040
Speaker 1: said it like she was thinking about getting in a car.

970
00:57:41,160 --> 00:57:44,040
Speaker 1: He was so sweet about it. He was like, if

971
00:57:44,080 --> 00:57:48,920
Speaker 1: you get the Nissan, you you get whatever you why

972
00:57:48,960 --> 00:57:55,960
Speaker 1: couldn't you go with the Ferrari the g Wagon, Like, yeah,

973
00:57:56,280 --> 00:57:59,360
Speaker 1: they were Actually I really and I actually got sucked

974
00:57:59,360 --> 00:58:01,760
Speaker 1: by a light stay here dildo. That was one of

975
00:58:01,800 --> 00:58:04,200
Speaker 1: the funner parts that I got to see the pictures

976
00:58:04,240 --> 00:58:07,960
Speaker 1: afterwards of me being sucked by because my friend made

977
00:58:07,960 --> 00:58:12,160
Speaker 1: it three D uh, three D printed dildo and I

978
00:58:12,160 --> 00:58:16,760
Speaker 1: thought it was three D photos. I'm like, they didn't out, yeah, photos,

979
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:20,480
Speaker 1: but I had a professional photographer there to take photos

980
00:58:20,480 --> 00:58:23,960
Speaker 1: of the moments that specifically were about me, because I

981
00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:26,840
Speaker 1: wanted to protect other people's privacy and I also have

982
00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:29,760
Speaker 1: mass so people wanted to if they got caught in background,

983
00:58:29,920 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 1: they could protect themselves. A real coffee thing. But did

984
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,840
Speaker 1: anybody come on you? No one came on me except

985
00:58:35,840 --> 00:58:38,400
Speaker 1: for my partner, who was the last person who sucked me,

986
00:58:38,880 --> 00:58:41,440
Speaker 1: and so he came inside me, which was really nice.

987
00:58:41,680 --> 00:58:43,840
Speaker 1: How long did it take him to come because I

988
00:58:43,840 --> 00:58:45,360
Speaker 1: feel like I'd have been so happy, you'd have been

989
00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:48,080
Speaker 1: like I was blowing him for about an hour, so

990
00:58:48,840 --> 00:58:52,280
Speaker 1: he was it was like, you know, pretty good to go,

991
00:58:52,640 --> 00:58:55,320
Speaker 1: Like he actually usually lasts a lot longer. But I

992
00:58:55,320 --> 00:58:57,800
Speaker 1: think like because of the excitement of like watching everybody

993
00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:00,320
Speaker 1: funk around us, and then there were people being dogs.

994
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:02,760
Speaker 1: We had an electro play station, so there are a

995
00:59:02,800 --> 00:59:05,960
Speaker 1: lot of different beings. No, this is free from my birthday,

996
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 1: but it did inspire me. But it inspired me to

997
00:59:10,840 --> 00:59:13,360
Speaker 1: do events after that. And so literally right after that,

998
00:59:13,400 --> 00:59:15,880
Speaker 1: I was like, I want to curate safe spaces for people.

999
00:59:17,880 --> 00:59:20,680
Speaker 1: Sex party I've heard of, I think like the one

1000
00:59:20,680 --> 00:59:22,400
Speaker 1: that I had heard about that was up there. Um

1001
00:59:22,640 --> 00:59:24,720
Speaker 1: was one of those like those ones in l A

1002
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:27,160
Speaker 1: that they pay like thousands of dollars for just because

1003
00:59:27,160 --> 00:59:31,520
Speaker 1: of everything that's going on. But also people are so

1004
00:59:31,640 --> 00:59:34,400
Speaker 1: coupled up and don't necessarily want to swap in these parties.

1005
00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:36,880
Speaker 1: That it did. But I love that you you opened

1006
00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:40,840
Speaker 1: that up for people. Absolutely, could I ask them to again.

1007
00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:44,760
Speaker 1: The biggest concern with women is how their partners, they

1008
00:59:44,760 --> 00:59:48,520
Speaker 1: feel their partners will view them after was Um, what

1009
00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:55,040
Speaker 1: is it called? What is it? Save something? After after care?

1010
00:59:55,160 --> 00:59:57,040
Speaker 1: After cafter care? Okay, that's what I thought you were

1011
00:59:57,080 --> 01:00:03,360
Speaker 1: saying that I was. I was like, Oh, I think

1012
01:00:03,360 --> 01:00:05,360
Speaker 1: it's after care, but I don't want to What did

1013
01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:07,440
Speaker 1: aftercare look like? And what was the conversation with your

1014
01:00:07,480 --> 01:00:10,640
Speaker 1: partner after this experience? Oh? It was so beautiful one

1015
01:00:10,760 --> 01:00:12,880
Speaker 1: to begin with, my friend that was there that was

1016
01:00:12,920 --> 01:00:16,160
Speaker 1: kind of moderating the list, if you will. She was

1017
01:00:16,200 --> 01:00:18,720
Speaker 1: giving me positive affirmations of what a gift I was

1018
01:00:18,760 --> 01:00:22,200
Speaker 1: giving everyone, how beautiful of a goddess I am, you know,

1019
01:00:22,440 --> 01:00:27,720
Speaker 1: very uplifting and empowering, empowering things during, yes, during, and

1020
01:00:27,760 --> 01:00:30,760
Speaker 1: so that was super helpful and got me in a

1021
01:00:30,840 --> 01:00:34,840
Speaker 1: really beautiful headspace. And then afterwards just I need physical

1022
01:00:34,920 --> 01:00:38,000
Speaker 1: touch like that is one of my big love languages.

1023
01:00:38,240 --> 01:00:41,920
Speaker 1: So I love compression, I love closeness. And so just

1024
01:00:41,960 --> 01:00:44,360
Speaker 1: sitting there wrapped in a blanket cutting with my partner,

1025
01:00:44,360 --> 01:00:48,120
Speaker 1: well literally everyone is sucking around us was like one

1026
01:00:48,120 --> 01:00:50,880
Speaker 1: of the most magical experiences. And I also had two

1027
01:00:50,920 --> 01:00:52,920
Speaker 1: of my submissives there and they were the only two

1028
01:00:52,960 --> 01:00:54,840
Speaker 1: people that were not allowed to suck me because I

1029
01:00:54,840 --> 01:01:12,320
Speaker 1: don't suck my submissives. That was my banana banner. That's interesting,

1030
01:01:13,440 --> 01:01:18,080
Speaker 1: do you I do have one question um questions where

1031
01:01:18,120 --> 01:01:21,880
Speaker 1: people allowed to be vowyors. Absolutely, I am a big boy.

1032
01:01:21,920 --> 01:01:24,000
Speaker 1: I'm more of a vowyer than I am an exhibitionist.

1033
01:01:24,160 --> 01:01:26,320
Speaker 1: I know saying that after this display, but I literally

1034
01:01:26,360 --> 01:01:29,800
Speaker 1: have to be sensory deprived because I'm not an exhibitionist,

1035
01:01:30,000 --> 01:01:32,920
Speaker 1: and so I don't want to know that I'm on display.

1036
01:01:33,120 --> 01:01:35,560
Speaker 1: I kind of have to forget that I'm you just

1037
01:01:35,600 --> 01:01:40,080
Speaker 1: wanted fucking pictures exactly. And like the experience of having

1038
01:01:40,160 --> 01:01:42,720
Speaker 1: all of these people penetrate me one after the other,

1039
01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:46,720
Speaker 1: that was the biggest part of it, and so I

1040
01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:49,040
Speaker 1: was really it for me. It's just the dicks that

1041
01:01:49,160 --> 01:01:57,320
Speaker 1: came in each and everything penetration. You know, I'm laughing

1042
01:01:57,400 --> 01:02:00,040
Speaker 1: and smiling about it because listening to your voice of

1043
01:02:00,120 --> 01:02:04,560
Speaker 1: a very innocent right, you're a voice. And Mandy and

1044
01:02:04,560 --> 01:02:07,240
Speaker 1: I were talking about baby spice this morning. We were talking,

1045
01:02:07,960 --> 01:02:13,120
Speaker 1: you look spice, but you give me such baby spice energy,

1046
01:02:14,640 --> 01:02:18,600
Speaker 1: even saying like, uh, you do coming off you come

1047
01:02:18,600 --> 01:02:21,080
Speaker 1: off so soft. But yet even though you're a dom

1048
01:02:21,160 --> 01:02:23,840
Speaker 1: and you have subs, I just know like you switch

1049
01:02:23,920 --> 01:02:26,960
Speaker 1: in and out of those roles probably, and what do

1050
01:02:27,000 --> 01:02:29,040
Speaker 1: you wake up and say today, I'm I want to

1051
01:02:29,080 --> 01:02:31,280
Speaker 1: be more dominant? Like how do you switch in and

1052
01:02:31,280 --> 01:02:34,920
Speaker 1: out of those roles? Last? That was the last question. Um, Yes,

1053
01:02:35,080 --> 01:02:37,640
Speaker 1: being a femdom has empowered me in my day to

1054
01:02:37,720 --> 01:02:41,960
Speaker 1: day life, so advocating for myself setting boundaries for myself,

1055
01:02:42,200 --> 01:02:46,200
Speaker 1: clear communications before I, you know, get involved with anyone,

1056
01:02:46,400 --> 01:02:48,840
Speaker 1: you know, not just sexually or in the bedroom, but

1057
01:02:48,920 --> 01:02:52,880
Speaker 1: any kind of business interactions and understanding. You know, Okay,

1058
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:55,120
Speaker 1: what are you asking of me? What are your needs

1059
01:02:55,160 --> 01:02:57,400
Speaker 1: of me? And then what can I bring to the table.

1060
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:00,600
Speaker 1: I apply those to my sessions with my submissives, and

1061
01:03:00,640 --> 01:03:03,720
Speaker 1: I also apply those to how I attack life. And

1062
01:03:03,760 --> 01:03:07,320
Speaker 1: so it has really been encouraging for me to be like, oh,

1063
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:08,800
Speaker 1: I'm not just going to be this go with the

1064
01:03:08,840 --> 01:03:11,880
Speaker 1: flow kind of girl. Like even when I became Polly

1065
01:03:12,000 --> 01:03:14,440
Speaker 1: and I wanted and I was exploring my sexuality. I

1066
01:03:14,520 --> 01:03:16,120
Speaker 1: wanted to be the girl that was like down for

1067
01:03:16,240 --> 01:03:19,520
Speaker 1: whatever and like deep dive into the you know, orgy pool.

1068
01:03:19,600 --> 01:03:22,480
Speaker 1: And then I was like, actually, I need more kissing

1069
01:03:22,520 --> 01:03:24,880
Speaker 1: and touching and hugging and I want to make out

1070
01:03:24,960 --> 01:03:28,080
Speaker 1: more instead of I should have been I'm an aries,

1071
01:03:28,160 --> 01:03:32,600
Speaker 1: but I was to be quat. But I realized that

1072
01:03:32,640 --> 01:03:35,840
Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, I don't regret being that person

1073
01:03:36,040 --> 01:03:38,400
Speaker 1: and deep diving into all of that, but now I

1074
01:03:38,400 --> 01:03:40,840
Speaker 1: think I need a little bit more. And so I've

1075
01:03:41,080 --> 01:03:44,600
Speaker 1: realized that because I can set those boundaries for myself

1076
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:47,400
Speaker 1: and still go to play parties. Still host play parties,

1077
01:03:47,480 --> 01:03:49,200
Speaker 1: but I don't have to be in the middle of

1078
01:03:49,240 --> 01:03:51,640
Speaker 1: it all, you know, in order to actually be fulfilled

1079
01:03:51,640 --> 01:03:54,160
Speaker 1: and enjoying myself. So that was the lesson that I

1080
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:56,800
Speaker 1: had to learn over time. And it wasn't until I

1081
01:03:56,840 --> 01:04:01,320
Speaker 1: became a professional dominatrix that I really understood and embrace that.

1082
01:04:01,600 --> 01:04:03,800
Speaker 1: And then it was encouraging because as I was more

1083
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:07,240
Speaker 1: firm with my boundaries, people respected it more, and then

1084
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:10,000
Speaker 1: that reaffirmed me to be more harder with my boundaries.

1085
01:04:10,040 --> 01:04:12,960
Speaker 1: They do people generally, I mean, I know we do

1086
01:04:13,000 --> 01:04:14,800
Speaker 1: a lot of sexual awareness as far as like people

1087
01:04:14,880 --> 01:04:18,600
Speaker 1: just being whether taking taking advantage of someone being abusive

1088
01:04:18,720 --> 01:04:21,040
Speaker 1: or whatever. Like I do think most people will give

1089
01:04:21,040 --> 01:04:24,160
Speaker 1: you what you're asking for. Yes, yes, you were awesome,

1090
01:04:24,200 --> 01:04:27,160
Speaker 1: like I'm sure everyone loves you, know seriously, And let

1091
01:04:27,240 --> 01:04:30,000
Speaker 1: our listeners know where they may be able to find you.

1092
01:04:30,160 --> 01:04:31,800
Speaker 1: Um and even if you have an event coming up,

1093
01:04:31,800 --> 01:04:38,480
Speaker 1: they want to know if you open Yeah, you're just open, Okay,

1094
01:04:39,040 --> 01:04:42,600
Speaker 1: do the hole not only open right now? The calm down,

1095
01:04:43,280 --> 01:04:49,000
Speaker 1: weightless going over, Let let her listeners know where they

1096
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:51,760
Speaker 1: can follow you on social media, and again, maybe anything

1097
01:04:51,880 --> 01:04:53,680
Speaker 1: upcoming that you have if you have an email list,

1098
01:04:53,720 --> 01:04:55,800
Speaker 1: because I know you send everything to my phone, but yes,

1099
01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:58,880
Speaker 1: I have to work on that email list actually, but

1100
01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:03,120
Speaker 1: I have my Instagram which is Glittersaurus dot rex. UM

1101
01:05:03,160 --> 01:05:09,240
Speaker 1: like glittersaur like a dinosaur but with glitter um can

1102
01:05:09,400 --> 01:05:15,360
Speaker 1: see um and then UM. On Twitter, I'm Gontasaurus sixty nine.

1103
01:05:15,520 --> 01:05:17,080
Speaker 1: UM if you want to follow me there. I'm trying

1104
01:05:17,120 --> 01:05:18,920
Speaker 1: to build up my Twitter following since I'm being more

1105
01:05:18,960 --> 01:05:22,000
Speaker 1: shadow band on I gum and then I actually just

1106
01:05:22,080 --> 01:05:25,360
Speaker 1: made a website glittersaurus rex dot com, so you can

1107
01:05:25,480 --> 01:05:27,440
Speaker 1: check out my website. And I've actually post all my

1108
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:29,640
Speaker 1: events on my website so you can see that. The

1109
01:05:29,720 --> 01:05:31,760
Speaker 1: next one coming up is actually when I'm producing for

1110
01:05:31,760 --> 01:05:35,040
Speaker 1: the Bipop Collective. It's an erotic film festival, so we're

1111
01:05:35,040 --> 01:05:38,240
Speaker 1: going to be showcasing all aspects of erotica for from

1112
01:05:38,320 --> 01:05:41,920
Speaker 1: Bipop content creators. It's going to be the last day

1113
01:05:41,920 --> 01:05:46,240
Speaker 1: in February, so they February. And guys, if you are

1114
01:05:46,360 --> 01:05:50,040
Speaker 1: interested in, uh, you know, knowing more of her events, uh,

1115
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,800
Speaker 1: make sure you check the description of this episode and

1116
01:05:52,800 --> 01:05:54,240
Speaker 1: we'll be sure to tack her on all of our

1117
01:05:54,280 --> 01:05:57,200
Speaker 1: social media's And if you haven't yet we are on YouTube.

1118
01:05:57,440 --> 01:06:01,120
Speaker 1: So if you want to see all the glittersaurus, we

1119
01:06:01,200 --> 01:06:06,360
Speaker 1: got new but I got a white butt to be inclusive. Yeah, actually,

1120
01:06:06,440 --> 01:06:10,080
Speaker 1: gonna be honest with It's like a ping. I'm gonna

1121
01:06:10,120 --> 01:06:11,520
Speaker 1: be honest with y'all. I didn't know it's gonna come

1122
01:06:11,560 --> 01:06:13,240
Speaker 1: out that white, but I could tell. I thought to myself,

1123
01:06:13,240 --> 01:06:14,760
Speaker 1: as YouTube and gonna cancel us, and we got the

1124
01:06:14,760 --> 01:06:17,520
Speaker 1: white Yeah. So it was crazy. So we wanted to

1125
01:06:17,560 --> 01:06:20,360
Speaker 1: put tips, but we know for whatever reason, tits bothers.

1126
01:06:20,480 --> 01:06:23,919
Speaker 1: Everyone camera was like, she was like, let me get tipps.

1127
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:25,680
Speaker 1: I said no because they'd be weird. So we'll see

1128
01:06:25,680 --> 01:06:28,280
Speaker 1: if we get away with asks. Yeah, booty, but if

1129
01:06:28,280 --> 01:06:30,840
Speaker 1: you guys like so much, we're coming. I'm so glad.

1130
01:06:30,960 --> 01:06:32,400
Speaker 1: I feel like I told you should have came on

1131
01:06:32,400 --> 01:06:35,959
Speaker 1: like two years ago. I'm super glad and you shared

1132
01:06:36,040 --> 01:06:39,200
Speaker 1: your stories and now you blower shut up, you know.

1133
01:06:40,600 --> 01:06:43,479
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm looking for sugar daddies. If anybody wants

1134
01:06:43,680 --> 01:06:48,320
Speaker 1: just boiled me, maybe you should hit up pour Mines

1135
01:06:48,360 --> 01:06:51,520
Speaker 1: next in like Andrea might be able to have the

1136
01:06:51,560 --> 01:06:53,680
Speaker 1: more with that. Guys, we are going to leave y'all

1137
01:06:53,720 --> 01:06:55,880
Speaker 1: with a five minute bonus clip. Y'all know we're over

1138
01:06:55,920 --> 01:06:58,560
Speaker 1: there on the Pago. Thank you for not yelling. Go

1139
01:06:58,600 --> 01:07:01,919
Speaker 1: ahead and check the week out. You guys are really

1140
01:07:01,920 --> 01:07:05,080
Speaker 1: sweet about y'all, And to be very fair, I do

1141
01:07:05,120 --> 01:07:06,720
Speaker 1: want to talk to y'all real quick, and I know

1142
01:07:06,760 --> 01:07:12,040
Speaker 1: you're here. Uh. Mentally, things have been absolutely fucking insane

1143
01:07:12,080 --> 01:07:16,240
Speaker 1: draining with me personally, uh, with this show. Wheezy, we

1144
01:07:16,280 --> 01:07:18,800
Speaker 1: had a conversation before coming to the studio. She's dealing

1145
01:07:18,880 --> 01:07:21,000
Speaker 1: with a lot, and again it wasn't until even we

1146
01:07:21,080 --> 01:07:24,240
Speaker 1: recorded our Patreon this morning. We literally have not gone

1147
01:07:24,280 --> 01:07:28,120
Speaker 1: without an episode since we started this show in four years,

1148
01:07:28,440 --> 01:07:31,240
Speaker 1: so we haven't had a week off. And then literally

1149
01:07:31,320 --> 01:07:33,920
Speaker 1: over the last year and a half or a year

1150
01:07:33,920 --> 01:07:36,000
Speaker 1: and a half or so, we've been giving you guys

1151
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,480
Speaker 1: three two to three bonus episodes a week, so we're

1152
01:07:39,520 --> 01:07:42,320
Speaker 1: literally dropping them up seven to eight episodes a month.

1153
01:07:42,600 --> 01:07:44,560
Speaker 1: On top of y'all know, Wheezy has a new pod.

1154
01:07:44,680 --> 01:07:46,880
Speaker 1: I have two new pods. I have a box, she

1155
01:07:46,960 --> 01:07:51,040
Speaker 1: has a studio. Like I know, y'all think this is

1156
01:07:51,280 --> 01:07:54,000
Speaker 1: this is the easy part. It was really good for us,

1157
01:07:54,000 --> 01:07:56,000
Speaker 1: like we needed a refresher. Yeah, I wish it was

1158
01:07:56,040 --> 01:07:59,200
Speaker 1: a refresher for me. No, Paris was burning last week

1159
01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,520
Speaker 1: for me, glad that it was a refresh to there.

1160
01:08:01,880 --> 01:08:05,720
Speaker 1: I mean, I know, but oh, my friend was just like,

1161
01:08:05,880 --> 01:08:07,200
Speaker 1: maybe you should take a break or put it in

1162
01:08:07,240 --> 01:08:09,040
Speaker 1: your contract. I said, it's in one of my contracts.

1163
01:08:09,120 --> 01:08:11,120
Speaker 1: But then I have three other teams and three other people.

1164
01:08:11,360 --> 01:08:13,400
Speaker 1: You have a whole studio you're operating. There is no

1165
01:08:13,440 --> 01:08:16,519
Speaker 1: break for us. There is nuts no. So thank you

1166
01:08:16,560 --> 01:08:20,600
Speaker 1: all for not uh you know, attacking us on social media.

1167
01:08:20,680 --> 01:08:23,120
Speaker 1: We have a very good appreciate you guys a lot.

1168
01:08:23,240 --> 01:08:26,400
Speaker 1: I'm really grateful for that. Um. Yes, check out all

1169
01:08:26,400 --> 01:08:28,160
Speaker 1: of our other stuff. That's what we should do. We

1170
01:08:28,160 --> 01:08:30,320
Speaker 1: should plug our ship too. We know you like that

1171
01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:33,360
Speaker 1: good or bitch. But what I'm trying to tell y'all lives.

1172
01:08:33,439 --> 01:08:35,719
Speaker 1: We've got podcasts we got for fact sake that comes

1173
01:08:35,760 --> 01:08:39,200
Speaker 1: out tomorrow, and Andy's podcast comes out. I have seen.

1174
01:08:39,240 --> 01:08:41,880
Speaker 1: The thing is I have periods this And also I

1175
01:08:41,920 --> 01:08:44,120
Speaker 1: just want to shout out everybody who did get my

1176
01:08:44,160 --> 01:08:46,920
Speaker 1: merch Uh. It was Flashdale only available for a week,

1177
01:08:46,960 --> 01:08:51,160
Speaker 1: so if you didn't get it, you're bad. Um. But yeah,

1178
01:08:51,240 --> 01:08:55,639
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. It might come back, but no, the way

1179
01:08:55,760 --> 01:08:58,120
Speaker 1: the war HiPE even just jumped on it. I like

1180
01:08:59,160 --> 01:09:01,479
Speaker 1: twelve hours later had a hundred orders and I like

1181
01:09:01,600 --> 01:09:04,080
Speaker 1: could not believe it. This is a test trial for

1182
01:09:04,080 --> 01:09:10,560
Speaker 1: me with with my merch so e commerce. No, do

1183
01:09:10,640 --> 01:09:12,680
Speaker 1: you guys like sh In the Flesh come down to

1184
01:09:12,760 --> 01:09:15,559
Speaker 1: the studio meet me. I promise I won't suck your

1185
01:09:15,560 --> 01:09:17,599
Speaker 1: ship up. And if you're not local to New York

1186
01:09:17,600 --> 01:09:19,920
Speaker 1: to record your podcast, here do a concert with me.

1187
01:09:20,680 --> 01:09:29,440
Speaker 1: She has the jis couch. Y'all, this is the casting couch.

1188
01:09:29,760 --> 01:09:31,679
Speaker 1: I don't know it's from up but this one isn't.

1189
01:09:33,320 --> 01:09:35,320
Speaker 1: But guys, no check out. We're gonna leave you guys

1190
01:09:35,400 --> 01:09:37,640
Speaker 1: with a five minute bonus clip. Thank you guys for

1191
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:39,800
Speaker 1: supporting us. Make sure you guys supports you on and

1192
01:09:39,840 --> 01:09:41,720
Speaker 1: all of her events, follow her on social media, and

1193
01:09:41,760 --> 01:09:45,679
Speaker 1: if you got the check hit her up to thank

1194
01:09:45,680 --> 01:09:50,360
Speaker 1: you guys. Thank you. He was like, well, I think

1195
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:52,160
Speaker 1: you should tell me, and it came out again and

1196
01:09:52,160 --> 01:09:54,840
Speaker 1: I was like, honestly, she's already going through a lot

1197
01:09:54,840 --> 01:09:56,479
Speaker 1: because the town hall thing happened. I was like, I'm

1198
01:09:56,520 --> 01:09:59,280
Speaker 1: not bringing this up because I don't feel like being

1199
01:09:59,320 --> 01:10:01,600
Speaker 1: the bear bad news. So I sent it to a

1200
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:03,320
Speaker 1: dude I used to work with and was like, can

1201
01:10:03,360 --> 01:10:06,599
Speaker 1: you figure out how this link was published? And um,

1202
01:10:06,640 --> 01:10:10,280
Speaker 1: he asked me where? He said, first which is super interesting,

1203
01:10:10,280 --> 01:10:13,000
Speaker 1: which I want you guys to know. He said, First off,

1204
01:10:13,080 --> 01:10:16,000
Speaker 1: that this picture exists before you saw it, like before

1205
01:10:16,040 --> 01:10:17,720
Speaker 1: that person got it. Who leaked it? You think it

1206
01:10:17,760 --> 01:10:20,080
Speaker 1: was her ex boyfriend? And I told him the story

1207
01:10:20,439 --> 01:10:23,200
Speaker 1: and I said, he said, if the image that he

1208
01:10:23,360 --> 01:10:28,519
Speaker 1: uploaded came from a Google or something else, they are

1209
01:10:28,880 --> 01:10:30,200
Speaker 1: I keep saying, he I don't know who did it.

1210
01:10:30,640 --> 01:10:35,679
Speaker 1: They redistributed content. He's like, sometimes you can't even subpoena

1211
01:10:35,760 --> 01:10:38,760
Speaker 1: that person because it's already in circulation, much like a

1212
01:10:38,800 --> 01:10:42,080
Speaker 1: sex tape. Right, So he's like, if something and which

1213
01:10:42,080 --> 01:10:44,599
Speaker 1: I think everybody should really know this, He said, that's

1214
01:10:44,600 --> 01:10:48,080
Speaker 1: why a person like you who maybe saw Sage Trade

1215
01:10:48,080 --> 01:10:50,160
Speaker 1: song sex tape and reposted it can't really go to

1216
01:10:50,240 --> 01:10:54,280
Speaker 1: jail because you weren't the initial publisher. But when you

1217
01:10:54,360 --> 01:10:57,880
Speaker 1: make something publicly available and then you use any kind

1218
01:10:57,920 --> 01:11:01,719
Speaker 1: of electronic communication to keep asking it, it just depends

1219
01:11:01,720 --> 01:11:04,479
Speaker 1: where the sources from, he said. And when they figure

1220
01:11:04,479 --> 01:11:07,040
Speaker 1: out how that person uploaded it, however it's saved. Normally

1221
01:11:07,080 --> 01:11:09,759
Speaker 1: will say if they've had the original or not um,

1222
01:11:09,800 --> 01:11:13,320
Speaker 1: but he said, if it happened in New York, there's

1223
01:11:13,360 --> 01:11:16,559
Speaker 1: literally nothing you can do, and that, to me, I

1224
01:11:16,600 --> 01:11:19,880
Speaker 1: thought was crazy. I'm gonna actually send you this link.

1225
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:23,720
Speaker 1: But basically, uh so, the dude works at where I

1226
01:11:23,800 --> 01:11:25,960
Speaker 1: used to work, right, but he helps people figure out

1227
01:11:25,960 --> 01:11:28,800
Speaker 1: who hacked them, so he does the same thing kind

1228
01:11:28,840 --> 01:11:30,439
Speaker 1: of like when it comes to like porn ship. And

1229
01:11:30,479 --> 01:11:32,120
Speaker 1: there was a few girls he told me about when

1230
01:11:32,160 --> 01:11:34,160
Speaker 1: I was working with him actually, and he was like, Yo,

1231
01:11:34,200 --> 01:11:38,400
Speaker 1: they're like x's would upload videos um two discords or

1232
01:11:38,520 --> 01:11:40,800
Speaker 1: to porn hub and he's like, and I would help

1233
01:11:40,840 --> 01:11:42,639
Speaker 1: them figure out, like at least down to the zip

1234
01:11:42,640 --> 01:11:45,440
Speaker 1: code or something like that, who it is. So yeah,

1235
01:11:45,439 --> 01:11:47,479
Speaker 1: in New York there is no law against it. But

1236
01:11:47,560 --> 01:11:50,759
Speaker 1: in some other places, like in North Carolina, you can't

1237
01:11:50,800 --> 01:11:54,679
Speaker 1: even coerce or harass someone or demean or humiliate them

1238
01:11:54,760 --> 01:11:58,920
Speaker 1: online about an image a sexual image. So if that

1239
01:11:59,040 --> 01:12:03,360
Speaker 1: picture had any comments like whatever like that you didn't like,

1240
01:12:03,520 --> 01:12:08,880
Speaker 1: that's literally a class h fellow, Isn't that crazy just

1241
01:12:08,960 --> 01:12:13,280
Speaker 1: for talking shit about somebody's news. So I thought that

1242
01:12:13,439 --> 01:12:16,240
Speaker 1: was really interesting to learn because I had no idea,

1243
01:12:16,520 --> 01:12:18,880
Speaker 1: And honestly, it's you coming through with some real vanilla

1244
01:12:18,960 --> 01:12:21,760
Speaker 1: ship for real nigga, because to me, like this is

1245
01:12:21,800 --> 01:12:26,320
Speaker 1: probably top five, top three worst things to happen to

1246
01:12:26,360 --> 01:12:30,000
Speaker 1: a woman. Yeah, and and and I'll be very honest

1247
01:12:30,040 --> 01:12:32,240
Speaker 1: with you. And I didn't even think about it, I

1248
01:12:32,280 --> 01:12:34,720
Speaker 1: think until thing was it you that said it. It

1249
01:12:34,800 --> 01:12:37,519
Speaker 1: may have been my friend someone else that I was

1250
01:12:37,560 --> 01:12:42,879
Speaker 1: talking to yesterday. But the idea that that even another

1251
01:12:42,960 --> 01:12:45,840
Speaker 1: woman did this to a woman, and on top of

1252
01:12:45,880 --> 01:12:50,400
Speaker 1: that she's a sex worker. Uh, and so that, you know,

1253
01:12:51,200 --> 01:12:54,160
Speaker 1: that's just also hard. I don't know, I don't know,

1254
01:12:54,640 --> 01:12:57,360
Speaker 1: that's just that's just as hard. But y'all know me,

1255
01:12:57,400 --> 01:12:59,360
Speaker 1: we're gonna get to that. Oline. Look at me just

1256
01:12:59,600 --> 01:13:03,519
Speaker 1: getting over this ship. Um. Black s Excellence for this

1257
01:13:03,560 --> 01:13:08,240
Speaker 1: week is Audrey Lord. Lord is a self described black

1258
01:13:08,360 --> 01:13:13,240
Speaker 1: lesbian feminist mother poet warrior who made lasting contributions in

1259
01:13:13,280 --> 01:13:17,880
Speaker 1: the fields of feminist theory, critical race studies, and queer

1260
01:13:17,960 --> 01:13:21,320
Speaker 1: theory through her Damn, I chose something with these big

1261
01:13:21,320 --> 01:13:28,960
Speaker 1: words put pedagogy, pedagogy and writing it's p E D

1262
01:13:29,720 --> 01:13:35,479
Speaker 1: A G O g y. I'm trying to look and

1263
01:13:35,560 --> 01:13:41,640
Speaker 1: I can't even pedagogy, okay whatever, and writing among her

1264
01:13:41,680 --> 01:13:46,240
Speaker 1: most notable works are co from nineteen six, The Black Unicorn,

1265
01:13:46,680 --> 01:13:50,360
Speaker 1: The Cancer Journals, and Zombi, a new spelling of my name.

1266
01:13:51,120 --> 01:13:53,200
Speaker 1: I write for those women who do not speak, for

1267
01:13:53,240 --> 01:13:54,960
Speaker 1: those who do not have a choice, because they are

1268
01:13:54,960 --> 01:13:57,800
Speaker 1: so terrified. Because we are taught to respect fear more

1269
01:13:57,840 --> 01:14:00,840
Speaker 1: than ourselves. We've been taught that sile would save us,

1270
01:14:00,920 --> 01:14:06,000
Speaker 1: but it won't. Lord once said Pedagogy. Oh, what the

1271
01:14:06,040 --> 01:14:07,960
Speaker 1: fund is that? I just looked it up. I've heard

1272
01:14:08,000 --> 01:14:09,800
Speaker 1: I've seen the word before. I think I said it right.

1273
01:14:09,800 --> 01:14:12,640
Speaker 1: But it's um, the practice of teaching. It's just that

1274
01:14:12,720 --> 01:14:15,519
Speaker 1: sounds way better than what the funk I said. The

1275
01:14:16,160 --> 01:14:18,439
Speaker 1: meaning of it is basically like teaching something. Let me

1276
01:14:18,439 --> 01:14:20,639
Speaker 1: try to read it in a sentence. Um, it says

1277
01:14:20,680 --> 01:14:25,360
Speaker 1: the relationship between applied linguistics and the language Pedagogy. It's okay,

1278
01:14:25,479 --> 01:14:29,000
Speaker 1: it's basically teaching, but the actual act of teaching. They

1279
01:14:29,040 --> 01:14:32,200
Speaker 1: could have just said teaching the funk, you know, damn

1280
01:14:32,280 --> 01:14:33,599
Speaker 1: they'd be complicating ship