Speaker 1: Forever.
Speaker 2: Hey guys, Hey Marie Sidney, you look like you just
Speaker 2: got your braid to be done.
Speaker 3: I did not. There are the topic so fresh?
Speaker 4: No, they're ratty tatty. Honestly, it's because the headphones is over.
Speaker 3: The new growth.
Speaker 2: No. I saw a picture of you on the gramp
Speaker 2: the other day, the gramps, the gramps, Yeah, and they
Speaker 2: looked fresh.
Speaker 3: Honey.
Speaker 4: I only post stuff that I'm looking flawlesson.
Speaker 3: Y'all need to stop.
Speaker 4: Y'all need to stop tagging me in pictures that don't
Speaker 4: look better than the pictures that I post. If it
Speaker 4: don't look better, keep it to yourself, keep it for yourself,
Speaker 4: keep it for the records.
Speaker 2: You know how on Facebook you can be like tag
Speaker 2: yourself or not me, not me?
Speaker 3: Yep, No, I don't know her.
Speaker 4: I got in a fucking Facebook battle with somebody. They
Speaker 4: kept tagging me and I kept untagging myself and I
Speaker 4: had to message him like, bro, no, I don't want
Speaker 4: this photo. I don't want to be connected to this.
Speaker 4: It was a It was at a comedy show. It
Speaker 4: was just bad angles and just I looked fucking crazy
Speaker 4: and they always catch you with your mouth open and
Speaker 4: then the mic next to it, and it's like low key,
Speaker 4: looks like anybody could just draw a dick next to
Speaker 4: my mouth, and I don't appreciate it.
Speaker 2: See, That's why I opened my mouth real small when
Speaker 2: I'm on stage, even when I'm yelling at people.
Speaker 4: Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I can go through our
Speaker 4: photos and be like, oh, there goes Marie reading somebody
Speaker 4: with their mouth.
Speaker 3: Why man love it?
Speaker 2: List We did a show together on Sunday and this
Speaker 2: guy with dreads was there and I and I called
Speaker 2: him Quevo and everybody was laughing and he was like,
Speaker 2: I don't even look like Quavo, you know from the Migos. Yeah,
Speaker 2: And I was like, well, everybody's laughing. And then you
Speaker 2: try to insult me by calling me a young Aretha
Speaker 2: Franklin and I was like, Aretha hasn't had never been
Speaker 2: this skinny.
Speaker 3: What a fail.
Speaker 2: Even when she was skinny, she wasn't this skinny. And
Speaker 2: I had to call him a young woopie Godberg. Anyway,
Speaker 2: he was unprepared, he was unprepared to pay.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, listen, she gets paid for this,
Speaker 4: So why don't you just you know, be quiet or
Speaker 4: don't sit in the front.
Speaker 2: I know. But also if you're gonna be in the front,
Speaker 2: I'll be getting up and sitting, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Like he was, like he went to the bathroom, came
Speaker 2: back checking his phone. Sit your fucking ass down, your
Speaker 2: dusty ass down.
Speaker 3: Well not he was. He was not dusty, but I
Speaker 3: mean he was.
Speaker 4: I'm the nice one's diet dusty. He's dusty adjacent, maybe
Speaker 4: on the cusp of dusty and like just dirty.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's fine. Sure, how you doing, Marie? You
Speaker 3: look good, look like you've been working, working, working me. Uh,
Speaker 3: you're working me a.
Speaker 2: I don't know that song.
Speaker 3: It's a good song. I'm gonna play it for y'all
Speaker 3: another day.
Speaker 2: Somebody said that we should get a unofficial expert playlist
Speaker 2: popping on Spotify.
Speaker 3: We could do that soon. Can help us out with that.
Speaker 2: We just add songs that like we were listening to
Speaker 2: it currently for the.
Speaker 3: Week h obsessed.
Speaker 4: You know, I look like I could do it, like
Speaker 4: the Insecure playlist. I can't wait for it to come
Speaker 4: back because I'm really just missing you know.
Speaker 5: Is this the last season?
Speaker 3: Who knows? I feel like it should be. Oh man, Marie, Damn,
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 2: Like any of the characters on the show. They're so dumb.
Speaker 3: TV is hard, guys, just sudden, you.
Speaker 2: Know, mmmm hm, Cause there are shows that we like
Speaker 2: the characters we care, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: But I was talking to somebody this week about likability
Speaker 4: and it's like, just because you like someone doesn't mean
Speaker 4: it's necessarily good.
Speaker 3: I rather hate a character, but like the actual show.
Speaker 2: But you don't hate any of the characters, and you
Speaker 2: like the show. I hate all the characters and don't
Speaker 2: like the show.
Speaker 4: Shout out to Asa Ray, paving the way for all
Speaker 4: of the blacks, said, I would definitely go in.
Speaker 3: Can read some.
Speaker 5: Read something terrible?
Speaker 2: You know, wow, college friend, babysitter, you know, receptionist at
Speaker 2: the office.
Speaker 3: You know I'm available. She's a veil.
Speaker 2: Yeah, weekends though it's Fridays and Saturdays.
Speaker 3: It's cool.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 5: Cidy, what were you an expert in this week?
Speaker 3: Ah? What was that expert in?
Speaker 4: I don't know, getting curved, like just unexpectedly being curved.
Speaker 4: I was in this uberpool and you know that's what
Speaker 4: I do.
Speaker 3: That's like my brand diet Wills uh huh.
Speaker 4: And you know I used to write stories all the time,
Speaker 4: and I'm over it.
Speaker 3: So now I'll just keep my headphones on and I
Speaker 3: don't give a fuck.
Speaker 4: So but I got in the I got in the
Speaker 4: car and there was this guy, like probably the best
Speaker 4: looking dude I've ever seen in a pool ever.
Speaker 5: I was just like, in a pool, though, that's looking
Speaker 5: dude you'd ever seen in a pool?
Speaker 3: No, no, no, no.
Speaker 4: Outside of the pool, he definitely would have been still
Speaker 4: really good like New York City standards. I'm not talking
Speaker 4: about wichital I'm not talking about Wisconsin. I'm talking about
Speaker 4: New York City point. And he smelled good and he
Speaker 4: had like a nice shape up, and I was a
Speaker 4: nice cult. I was just like, what the fuck are
Speaker 4: you doing in this car? I mean, I look great too,
Speaker 4: but I'm just saying, what are you doing here? And
Speaker 4: so we're chatting. He wasn't he wasn't from New York,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, well, you obviously not on a business card,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean, Like you should have had
Speaker 4: a corporate card, not using uper pool. But we ended
Speaker 4: up having like a conversation and he like was asking
Speaker 4: me what I was doing, and I plugged the podcast
Speaker 4: and all this other stuff, and then I could see
Speaker 4: he was looking like, oh, am I about to get
Speaker 4: out soon, and I felt like he was gonna ask
Speaker 4: me my information.
Speaker 3: And he didn't, and I was mad.
Speaker 5: I was livid.
Speaker 3: I was I told the driver, I said, let's go back.
Speaker 2: But you're a whole lesbian. It don't matter, You're an
Speaker 2: entire I felt like one hundred and.
Speaker 4: Two percent, like it's a vibe going on in the pool.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's a gay vibe. Y'all were y'all were both gay?
Speaker 2: What happened? Yeah, he was on the way to his
Speaker 2: boyfriend's house and you were leaving your girlfriend's house.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's probably what it was. A bitch was yo,
Speaker 4: the fumes was coming. I was like, yo, he's definitely
Speaker 4: gonna ask me, like, Yo, what's your email? Like your
Speaker 4: He didn't even asked the Instagram handle? No, nothing, right,
Speaker 4: that's I mean, that's the.
Speaker 3: That's the new.
Speaker 2: I have a boyfriend, what's your Instagram? Or someone asked
Speaker 2: you for your number and you're like, you can follow me.
Speaker 1: He didn't ask me that, He asked me nothing.
Speaker 4: I like, was like, wow, I look really good right now,
Speaker 4: Like I have a latsh on?
Speaker 3: How dare you? Right then? You looked in the mind
Speaker 3: you had lettuce in your.
Speaker 4: Teeth, No bitch, because I hadn't eaten yet, so you're
Speaker 4: like in real down guant, very gaunt.
Speaker 3: It was.
Speaker 4: It was like a I was like, yo, you gonna
Speaker 4: come to a show or something. In my head, I
Speaker 4: was all this stuff was just the wheels were turning.
Speaker 4: I was like, Oh, we might get a coffee or something, not.
Speaker 2: Like why what is wrong with you? We might get
Speaker 2: a coffee or something for why?
Speaker 5: For my friends?
Speaker 6: I'm trying to.
Speaker 5: Help my friends out.
Speaker 2: No, you and this man, you in this beautiful gay man,
Speaker 2: We're gonna get a coffee for why.
Speaker 3: I'm here trying to help out my friends.
Speaker 2: But it wouldn't be you and and friends getting coffee
Speaker 2: with this man.
Speaker 3: It would just be trying to help out a mina.
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm sculping out people for my friends in an
Speaker 4: operpool smells all good.
Speaker 3: I was like, are you using a simpbird? What fragrance?
Speaker 3: Is that?
Speaker 1: Shut out the cinbird for little racking bone on time?
Speaker 3: I said, is that Narciso Rodriguez for him? For him?
Speaker 3: For him? For him? You're so dumb?
Speaker 1: Yes, I am thinking.
Speaker 5: I didn't give you his phone. It was like he
Speaker 5: was like what's happening?
Speaker 4: No, bitch, I was cracking jokes and everything. It was
Speaker 4: like it was like a one woman show.
Speaker 2: God. He was like, oh, I can't date her. She
Speaker 2: talked to damn but he was laughing. He was like,
Speaker 2: I have he said a single word. He was like,
Speaker 2: what do you do?
Speaker 3: I was like, clearly a comedian.
Speaker 5: He was like, oh, the driver was The driver was
Speaker 5: laughing too.
Speaker 3: He was like, this bitch is a mess.
Speaker 1: It was early.
Speaker 4: It was early, like like ten o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 4: That's not early early ten o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3: You were like early. It was like seven am is early.
Speaker 4: He looked like a better looking young Carl Thomas.
Speaker 3: He had a turn up. I got a Google.
Speaker 1: Call Thomas right now emotion no, and I can't go.
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to hold on to you.
Speaker 5: Exactly. Carl Thomas looks like somebody's dad.
Speaker 3: Shut up, bitch, I said a younger Carl Thomas. You
Speaker 3: said a younger more attractive.
Speaker 2: You could have literally said anybody else, a younger more attractive.
Speaker 5: That's not Carl Thomas.
Speaker 4: He looked like a tall Bobby Valentino if he didn't
Speaker 4: have an overbitte.
Speaker 3: No down, I just want to get to know you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Sydney a tall. Bobby Valentino is not Bobby Valentino.
Speaker 2: But two of them don't look anything a lot.
Speaker 3: You're a hater?
Speaker 1: Can you also look at Bobby Valentino?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 4: No, I don't have y'all know I don't have Lasik.
Speaker 4: I can't see Sydney kind of no girl, Damn Andrews,
Speaker 4: shut up, shut up, chip, shut up?
Speaker 2: Producer intern tall gay producer In turn, Hey Marie, where
Speaker 2: were you an expert? In? Honestly, I was in a
Speaker 2: lot of ubers this week also, and I had a
Speaker 2: simular situation.
Speaker 3: I guess.
Speaker 2: I got in the car and the driver was fine.
Speaker 2: I was like, and the music he was playing was good?
Speaker 2: Like what mixes this? And he was like, it's a
Speaker 2: playlist that I'll make, you know, for the car, you know,
Speaker 2: for the when I'm riving.
Speaker 3: It was soon that was like, Wow, we're talking.
Speaker 2: And then we were, and you know, I was I
Speaker 2: kept trying to put my headphones in, but I was like,
Speaker 2: let me leave these out until he's done talking to me.
Speaker 2: We talked the whole way and I couldn't tell, like
Speaker 2: if he was tall, is there a way to tell
Speaker 2: how taller man is when he's sitting by, like, well,
Speaker 2: his shoulders are doing.
Speaker 4: No because the seat is adjusted to how the legs right.
Speaker 2: But I was like, I was right, But I was like,
Speaker 2: can I like by the shoulders? Is there a way
Speaker 2: that should have acted?
Speaker 4: Like you thought you had a suitcase in the trunk?
Speaker 4: Like cold, you just get out.
Speaker 2: He saw me, he saw me walk, He saw me
Speaker 2: walk to the car from my uh my house, and
Speaker 2: there was no suitcase. Friend, but I have my good
Speaker 2: coat on that I stole from work that I had
Speaker 2: to give back, so I looked like money you gave
Speaker 2: me back. Yeah. I was only supposed to use that
Speaker 2: coach for like I was supposed to use that code
Speaker 2: for the weekend, and I had it for two weeks.
Speaker 1: Well, what are they gonna do.
Speaker 3: They're gonna return it. They can't return it.
Speaker 2: No, they can't return it. They bought, they paid for
Speaker 2: the coach exactly. You know, I'm just waiting for the
Speaker 2: season to end.
Speaker 3: They're gonna give it to you.
Speaker 2: And by the season, I mean winter, waiting for winter
Speaker 2: to end, so I can be like.
Speaker 3: They're gonna give it to you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just gonna hold on to this Cruela deville
Speaker 2: coade because y'all, I don't need.
Speaker 4: This, so they didn't give it. So wait, no, so
Speaker 4: you didn't get his number.
Speaker 2: Oh so we're talking and we're laughing, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I can't date this man. He's a taxi driver, Like,
Speaker 2: I can't date him. What am I gonna Where are
Speaker 2: we gonna go? Also, he said some words wrong, like
Speaker 2: he pronounced them wrong, and I was like, oh, he
Speaker 2: might be dumb, he might be a little bit illiterate.
Speaker 2: I don't remember what we were talking about, the R Kelly.
Speaker 2: We were talking about the R Kelly and I can't
Speaker 2: set up a fight, put a feeling. He was like,
Speaker 2: set a feel, fed a pill, set of fields. They
Speaker 2: crazy out here, but we were, but we were also
Speaker 2: we were talking about that and like his take on
Speaker 2: it was like a tiny problematic problematic.
Speaker 3: It was like, okay, but pronouncing words, I mean, that
Speaker 3: is also my brand.
Speaker 5: If you can't if you can't say them, then you
Speaker 5: can't spell them.
Speaker 3: That's also my brand.
Speaker 2: You can't spell.
Speaker 5: You be saying a lot of voice memos.
Speaker 4: Speaking of bitch ass tricks, our guest is not one imagine.
Speaker 4: We've actually brought in somebody like that. Yes, this our
Speaker 4: next guest is quite divine.
Speaker 5: Divine.
Speaker 4: I truly enjoy her, enjoy her on and off the stage.
Speaker 4: She's written a book before. Yes, her Twitter popping ping,
Speaker 4: and she's just a pillar in the comedy community. Par Okay, wow,
Speaker 4: give it up for our blonde expert.
Speaker 5: Salna Coplic.
Speaker 2: Okay, wow, I.
Speaker 3: Am the I am the uber driver.
Speaker 6: He was like, yeah, is there an Ellen there?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's copy copy today.
Speaker 1: Certainly. I Do you have anything to add to what
Speaker 1: you heard just now?
Speaker 3: They were Uberpool stories, you know.
Speaker 1: I do.
Speaker 6: Oh, Sydney, I miss your Uperpool tales because, oh my god, it.
Speaker 3: Was so good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you still doing them when you're in LA again.
Speaker 6: I know, But I know you mean, I think it's
Speaker 6: important to be like, you know, when you're just not
Speaker 6: feeling it anymore. Yeah, I think it's so easy to off,
Speaker 6: like to just keep doing the same thing because people
Speaker 6: wanted you to do it.
Speaker 1: But like, yeah, I could move on from this, you know,
Speaker 1: if I'm not inspired.
Speaker 3: No, it's not that I'm not inspired.
Speaker 4: It's just that, like, the actual work that I had
Speaker 4: to do in the pool to get these stories is
Speaker 4: a lot.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I remember one time there were like people
Speaker 6: a couple trying to go to the airport, and I
Speaker 6: was like, are they.
Speaker 1: Gonna make their fun?
Speaker 4: Everybody was involved and every time like me, and when
Speaker 4: me and Marie are in a pool, like we obviously
Speaker 4: went instigate everything everything for it.
Speaker 2: To be we'd be like, damn says he puts you
Speaker 2: in a pool? Yeah, hates you.
Speaker 3: I gotta be that hype man, gass it up.
Speaker 5: You know, have you ever dated a cab driver or
Speaker 5: somebody who drives in thet.
Speaker 1: I used to day a truck driver.
Speaker 5: What yeah, you get into that?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 5: Is it the ross country truck driver?
Speaker 1: Short?
Speaker 6: Short term but or like short range but that's still
Speaker 6: within like New England, New Jersey, New York.
Speaker 3: I heard Davey doing myth is that true?
Speaker 6: Ryan did not?
Speaker 1: But he was Ryan.
Speaker 5: But Ryan was definitely at the truck stock.
Speaker 6: Yeah, man, Yeah, it was a sweet dude we met
Speaker 6: because it's sort of my type of dude.
Speaker 1: I always liked dudes who were kind of.
Speaker 6: Like tough guys or like fighters or boxers. And he
Speaker 6: was a former yeah.
Speaker 1: And like tattooed, you know, like dudes dudes.
Speaker 6: But he'd been a hockey gooned, which is just like
Speaker 6: a fighter in hockey, like they can skate gooned goon
Speaker 6: geo And yeah, it's basically just like if you can
Speaker 6: kind of skate, but you're mostly like a boxer on ice.
Speaker 6: So he was a hockey gooon for years, and then
Speaker 6: he became a truck driver because like, hockey is really
Speaker 6: bad for your brain.
Speaker 2: You know, they get that's white, you know, the white
Speaker 2: people football exactly truly.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then he became a truck driver. What's the
Speaker 1: what's the application to become a truck driver?
Speaker 3: You just got to not have no friends.
Speaker 6: I want to stop getting punched in the face. For money,
Speaker 6: I'll drive this.
Speaker 5: Truck Selena that's a pilot. Yeah, play.
Speaker 1: And his dutiful weirdo wife it h.
Speaker 5: And then turned into a serial killer.
Speaker 2: Yes, come on, then you got to be this stenographer
Speaker 2: producer and turns stenographer take these notes.
Speaker 5: That is crazy. So where did y'all meet?
Speaker 6: We met at a concert. It was this group called
Speaker 6: BlackBerry Smoke. It's sort of like country Americana.
Speaker 2: Seems like somebody that wears like a cowboy boot with
Speaker 2: a skirt, I know, like a young Swift.
Speaker 1: I know, I know, Yeah, I hope to think more
Speaker 1: like a Casey Musgraves.
Speaker 5: Now I don't know. I don't know any of her
Speaker 5: songs either, but you know.
Speaker 6: She has this album, Golden Hour. It's her third album
Speaker 6: and it's fucking solid.
Speaker 5: Is that?
Speaker 1: What did she win the Grammy? Before we see the
Speaker 1: Golden Hour, which is her like newest album.
Speaker 5: But what was the category?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 6: She won.
Speaker 1: I think she won like Best Artist, which she was
Speaker 1: like blown away by.
Speaker 6: Have you seen the memes of her being like what why?
Speaker 6: And Yang Casey?
Speaker 3: No, she's not.
Speaker 1: She's married to Rustin Kelly. Okay, Brandy Carlyle.
Speaker 6: Brandy Carlyle is a country singer who's gay, who like
Speaker 6: blew it out.
Speaker 4: But they said, but they were talking about Casey like
Speaker 4: she was like this weird, this gay icon.
Speaker 6: She's very very like pro LGBTQ stuff. She's a song
Speaker 6: called Rainbow. She's been always been very involved with.
Speaker 1: Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on, you could have been.
Speaker 2: You could have been you could have been our country
Speaker 2: music against. Yeah, she's married named of course, like they
Speaker 2: started to call him Justin and they were like something
Speaker 2: whiter water Rusting rust In Peace.
Speaker 5: Was his last name.
Speaker 6: Pierce Kelly.
Speaker 1: Okay, pe.
Speaker 3: R, I P that's crazy.
Speaker 6: Yeah. Okay, So Casey, what's a song that she has
Speaker 6: that we should listen to. One of my favorites that
Speaker 6: was ruined by my summer relationship. It's called slow Burn.
Speaker 6: It's the first song on her album.
Speaker 2: It's Got to the Spot slow Burn.
Speaker 1: I love her burn in my mind. Yes, yeah, you're
Speaker 1: not far from.
Speaker 5: It or Supburning?
Speaker 2: No slow burns, slow birds, slow burn, slowed it.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Okay, So you met at a concert. You're like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, he drives drucks, he looks like he might
Speaker 2: choke me.
Speaker 3: Let's do it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, well he that was when he was a He's like,
Speaker 6: we met at a concert and I sort of he
Speaker 6: made fun of how I danced, which I was like, oh,
Speaker 6: gentle nagging, I'll dig it.
Speaker 1: And then but then we kind of hit it off.
Speaker 6: And he was wearing one of those shirts that's called
Speaker 6: it's called real tree pattern. It's like, if you're more
Speaker 6: than camo, if you're like a hunter in the woods,
Speaker 6: you wear this pattern called a real tree and it
Speaker 6: literally you look like a tree, Like it's absurd.
Speaker 1: That okay, which I can dig that look, you know,
Speaker 1: I know.
Speaker 2: I know, I'm not surprised, but also like a little
Speaker 2: bit surprised. I'm not so white, I'm saying it. I'm
Speaker 2: not surprised by any of this.
Speaker 3: I'm not surprised. It's very blonde of you.
Speaker 6: Yeah, well I will stay I'm half Wasp, half red
Speaker 6: Neck by heritage, so which I feel like, And those
Speaker 6: are the two sides of blondness, to be honest, Like
Speaker 6: in the blonde community, there's like ashy blonde, which is
Speaker 6: a light white blonde, very Upper east Side, you know,
Speaker 6: and then there's a brassy blonde, which is the yellow
Speaker 6: blonde like Baywatch, Pam Anderson.
Speaker 1: And I feel like I'm sort of both of these things,
Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, like you're a red Like you're a
Speaker 1: red neck that wears pearls exactly.
Speaker 4: Yeah here, like you you might put a little mountain
Speaker 4: dew in your white wine.
Speaker 3: Yeah exactly.
Speaker 6: Okay, so good, yes, And I really I feel like
Speaker 6: I really toe that line because usually, especially when I
Speaker 6: go to different colorists, usually they're like, which do you want?
Speaker 6: Do you want like the cool blonde, the ashy blonde,
Speaker 6: or you want the warm blonde? And I usually they
Speaker 6: always think that I.
Speaker 5: Want to mix them both.
Speaker 6: I know I'm but usually I want the yellow, the
Speaker 6: warm blonde, but in New York, the ashy light blonde
Speaker 6: is more popular because it's really Yeah. I mean that's
Speaker 6: what colorists will tell me, just because it's sort of
Speaker 6: like Upper East Side.
Speaker 3: But is it more money? Okay?
Speaker 5: Which is more expense?
Speaker 3: More good? That's what it is. It's sell, bitch.
Speaker 6: You're right.
Speaker 3: Always when I was.
Speaker 4: A waitress, I've been like, people order Moet and I'm like,
Speaker 4: but don't you want dumb?
Speaker 3: Not much? Is a dope? Whatever?
Speaker 5: Yeah, upsell it is not that's additional dollars.
Speaker 1: Like I get. When I get my hair highlighted.
Speaker 6: You could either do full head or half head, and
Speaker 6: I've gotten lazy lately, so I just do half head
Speaker 6: and then I do brown underneath because I kind of
Speaker 6: like two tone, even though I know it's very like
Speaker 6: mid nineties.
Speaker 5: Two I think you. When I saw you downstairs, I
Speaker 5: was like, your hair looks great, thank you.
Speaker 6: I got my hair colored recently and the colorist or
Speaker 6: I just got it cut. The guy was like making
Speaker 6: fun of me to my face, and I knew he
Speaker 6: was like and he was like, you know, what are
Speaker 6: we doing down here?
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like I just leave that be like we're
Speaker 2: not giving you a chip, that's what we're doing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I was like I'm leaving that. I was
Speaker 1: like I kind of like two tone.
Speaker 6: I was like, I don't care if it looks trashy
Speaker 6: and he goes, yeah, when did you get that done?
Speaker 6: Like fifteen years ago?
Speaker 3: And went hold on, you need yep this place?
Speaker 1: What place is this between us?
Speaker 2: Let's drag them exactly doesn't leave this room but off
Speaker 2: the record, cover the mics.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I will say I don't want to bash this lot.
Speaker 6: I think it was a guy who was just like
Speaker 6: doing his like rented seat for like a week or something, but.
Speaker 5: He was rented a bit.
Speaker 6: And I'm like, I'm doing to tone and I know
Speaker 6: what I'm doing. Okay, I know what I look like,
Speaker 6: and that is harashing.
Speaker 5: It wasn't good.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 5: So I find that a lot of a lot of
Speaker 5: times the style.
Speaker 2: Of hair looks like trash.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's just like.
Speaker 4: They're showing up and they're like, well, you know, I
Speaker 4: can actually you know, do you?
Speaker 3: It's not about me? And it is that actually I
Speaker 3: want to see.
Speaker 6: You and exactly show me what you do so. Have
Speaker 6: you guys ever experimented with blonde hair coloring.
Speaker 5: When somebody else a piece? Do you like things that
Speaker 5: you clip in and clip out?
Speaker 3: You know what? Actually in high school when I for prom.
Speaker 4: I I had like a little peroxided it, Yes, a
Speaker 4: little highlights. I had highlights fun and broke the fun
Speaker 4: out of my hand. Oh it was so short, it
Speaker 4: was like brows. Like it was so short it looked
Speaker 4: like eyebrows.
Speaker 2: It was.
Speaker 3: It took it all out.
Speaker 5: So but when the hair was there, what did it
Speaker 5: look like?
Speaker 3: It was cute? I was like, oh, shoot, I want
Speaker 3: to do this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then the Lord was actually the Lord giveth
Speaker 2: and he takes.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I feel like dyeing your hair excessively is just I
Speaker 4: don't know how people do it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it can be so damaging, and I feel like
Speaker 6: I've learned that the hard way. Like I have sort
Speaker 6: of layers by Like I used to get layers on
Speaker 6: purpose and now it's just breakage, and so like I'll
Speaker 6: have sort of shorter layers.
Speaker 2: There's special shampoo you're supposed to use. Oh, I mean
Speaker 2: I use like a purple shampoo.
Speaker 6: Yea purple shampoo keeps the color from getting too brassy
Speaker 6: and like brings it back to be sort of cooler,
Speaker 6: because I think some people think that brassy blonde seems
Speaker 6: like trashy looking, which I get.
Speaker 4: What's up with this trash because it's it's I think
Speaker 4: it's weird that you can connect a hair color to
Speaker 4: someone's status.
Speaker 3: You know, that's strange.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean yes, but you could see like box color. Yes,
Speaker 2: like you can see they did that by themselves in
Speaker 2: the bathroom of of a right age, okay.
Speaker 5: Versus oh, somebody like they spent money on this.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: That's That's one thing I find fascinating about hair is
Speaker 6: I think there's so many tiny indicators and like when
Speaker 6: you're really in it and you know you can see
Speaker 6: these things, you know, it's like, I mean, I have
Speaker 6: this silly Twitter install where I talk about the New
Speaker 6: York Times Wedding section and I just joke around about
Speaker 6: snobbery and judgment, and I often talk about like class
Speaker 6: indicators and yeah, it's like if you can tell that
Speaker 6: someone had their hair professionally done at a salon, like
Speaker 6: Frederick for Kai salon or something versus.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I was like for Kai.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, but I don't need to shut up.
Speaker 1: I'm allowed to make fun of the man.
Speaker 6: In the uber, But you know, you could tell, like
Speaker 6: who Sometimes you can tell, like if it's too brassy,
Speaker 6: that looks like you did it at home and you
Speaker 6: didn't leave it on long enough.
Speaker 2: No, I could tell if they did it at home.
Speaker 2: If like their their hair, their temples are the same
Speaker 2: color and their ears are like a little bit a
Speaker 2: little bite.
Speaker 3: I didn't even notice any of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Scalp is red and it's like, which you did well,
Speaker 2: I could tell if it's if you did it at home,
Speaker 2: Like the actual texture of your hair, like it looks
Speaker 2: either like really limp and fraw.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's supposed to like have more bounce, especially if
Speaker 4: you go to the salon. If you get a blowout
Speaker 4: and your shit is still stringy, like they didn't rob you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, throw the whole head away, get a new wig.
Speaker 5: Cis, So what made you go blonde?
Speaker 1: I was blonde when I was a kid, and I
Speaker 1: really liked it.
Speaker 6: I gotta say, like I've been blonde, red and brown,
Speaker 6: and I do think that it's true, like blondes have
Speaker 6: more fun and maybe it's just because like that's how
Speaker 6: I grew up and then as I got older, the
Speaker 6: blonde started to turn darker, which is very normal.
Speaker 2: Have you ever been like a dark brown?
Speaker 1: Yes, junior year in college it was.
Speaker 6: I was like, I want to try this, and oh god,
Speaker 6: I like, I wish i'd just like I remember my
Speaker 6: mom's colorist was like, Selena, I don't think you're gonna
Speaker 6: like this, like so much of your for your identity
Speaker 6: is wrapped up in being blonde.
Speaker 1: And I was like, that's change it up.
Speaker 6: And so he dyed me like light brown, and I
Speaker 6: was like, I hate it. I was so because I
Speaker 6: wanted to go like dark.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was.
Speaker 6: Do you remember when Cameron Diaz dyed her hair dark brown?
Speaker 4: Girl, you don't have the face for that. It's the
Speaker 4: first of all, the face and the eye color. Yeah,
Speaker 4: one color has to go.
Speaker 6: Too, I know. I mean, but I feel like dark
Speaker 6: hair with blue eyes can either look very like striking
Speaker 6: because it's so unexpected.
Speaker 1: But I can't really wash out your.
Speaker 3: Skin unless you're Megan Fox. Yeah, like if she can
Speaker 3: work like anything.
Speaker 2: I like Beyonce better with dark hair. Mm hmmmm I do.
Speaker 2: I like Beyonce better with dark brown hair. Yeah, like
Speaker 2: it just looks well. Yeah, they do some bronzer on
Speaker 2: Cameron Diaz.
Speaker 6: I know she ended up looking very pasty because her
Speaker 6: skin was so dark or her hair was so dark.
Speaker 1: But I stupidly was like, if she could do it,
Speaker 1: I could do it.
Speaker 4: So I feel like you got a little Cameron Diaz
Speaker 4: vibe a little bit.
Speaker 3: Thank you.
Speaker 2: I'm squint yeah, And the photo hasn't fully loaded yet, Diaz.
Speaker 3: Cameron Diaz was approachable.
Speaker 5: I don't hate her with the dark hair.
Speaker 1: I know, I remember looking at it.
Speaker 6: I remember looking at it and being like, you know what,
Speaker 6: I like that, and and I, you know what, I'm
Speaker 6: proud of myself because I I was willing to try
Speaker 6: something very different that I don't even know if i'd
Speaker 6: be willing to do that. But you didn't go that dark.
Speaker 6: I went very let me see, I went very very dark.
Speaker 6: It makes yes, it made her look really I went
Speaker 6: that dark, and I remember I was like so excited.
Speaker 1: I went out that night.
Speaker 6: I was home from from college junior year at Christmas time,
Speaker 6: and so I went to a bar that night and
Speaker 6: like saw some friends and literally people.
Speaker 1: Like looked at me, Yes, she looks good.
Speaker 6: People like looked at me, made eye contact and didn't
Speaker 6: even recognize me, Like it was the strangest thing, just
Speaker 6: like people weren't expecting me to have dark brown hair,
Speaker 6: so they like didn't friends didn't even see me. And
Speaker 6: I was like, it's Selena change like that. People don't
Speaker 6: even recognize.
Speaker 4: As an African American woman. This happens. It happens all
Speaker 4: the time. We'll change our hair, either like drastically or
Speaker 4: just slightly and.
Speaker 2: It'll go from curly to straight and people are like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, I didn't even recognize yeah, and it's like,
Speaker 2: you know this bomb ass body.
Speaker 4: When I was when I was waitressing and I had
Speaker 4: a weave like the whole time. I finally wore my
Speaker 4: hair natural and there were two managers. They kept circling around.
Speaker 4: They were off duty managers. They were just in the
Speaker 4: bar and they kept looking like looking at me. And
Speaker 4: then they asked one of the waitresses, like, who's this
Speaker 4: new hire that no one told us about what They
Speaker 4: didn't run it by us at all, And they were like,
Speaker 4: it's Sydney.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, that's hilarious.
Speaker 3: It's insane.
Speaker 2: It's so funny that they were looking for you to
Speaker 2: waiting for you to do something wrong Meanwhile, you've been
Speaker 2: working at that job for.
Speaker 3: Wrong.
Speaker 1: Even if I took my hair up in a bun
Speaker 1: that people won't recognize me.
Speaker 6: And I'm like, does my hair have to be down
Speaker 6: right around my face for you to see who I am?
Speaker 1: You know, it's so strange, Like I've ever seen your
Speaker 1: hair up.
Speaker 6: I wear it up occasionally, but I feel like when
Speaker 6: I'm out like doing and when I'm on stage doing comedy,
Speaker 6: usually it's always down.
Speaker 2: Really, yeah, you can't do comedy, No, I can't.
Speaker 3: The dual language, I know, Yeah.
Speaker 1: The two tone sometimes I do.
Speaker 6: But I feel like if people are going to photograph
Speaker 6: me on stage similarly, like I prefer to have something
Speaker 6: around my face.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: Why is that?
Speaker 6: I just think it sort of frames it more nicely.
Speaker 6: And I think some of my jokes are about being
Speaker 6: blonde or about being a sorority girl, and I feel
Speaker 6: like they hit harder if I have that look, you
Speaker 6: know what I mean?
Speaker 4: I agree when I talk about like just being gay
Speaker 4: and then I'm wearing sweats, so like, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll believe it.
Speaker 5: We could tell sir.
Speaker 3: Exactly, It's true.
Speaker 6: I have a joke that I do about being I
Speaker 6: had a tiny role on that TV show red Oaks
Speaker 6: It's on Amazon. Takes plaice in the eighties, and I
Speaker 6: have a joke that I do on stage about like
Speaker 6: being cast in it and how like the description of
Speaker 6: the character was like it was like blousey bottle blonde
Speaker 6: done some hard, live and seen better days. Like the
Speaker 6: age was ten years older than I was at the time,
Speaker 6: and I remember reading it and I was like, oh man,
Speaker 6: I got this, but it's breaking my heart.
Speaker 3: You got it.
Speaker 2: I'm like that's me.
Speaker 1: I was like, it's a trash back ten years old
Speaker 1: than me. Nailed it. Yeah, like but it you know.
Speaker 6: But I feel like whatever I tell that joke on stage,
Speaker 6: I can't tell it with my hair up, Like I
Speaker 6: have to tell it with like the hair down.
Speaker 2: Being like I know what I look like, Yeah yeah,
Speaker 2: because up almost is like youthful, like look at my
Speaker 2: bouncy little kid pony chain.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2: I do a joke on stage where I'm like I'm
Speaker 2: stunning and if I don't have any makeup on, which
Speaker 2: I never.
Speaker 5: Do, sometimes people are just like.
Speaker 2: Are you and I'm like, yes, that's not really my light. Yeah,
Speaker 2: just blame it on the light, I assure you. I
Speaker 2: brought a slideshow of me looking good. I'm like, look,
Speaker 2: you can go on my Instagram. I'm atrribly stunning and they're.
Speaker 3: Like, mmm, yeah, I do it.
Speaker 6: I do a joke usually, I go I was in
Speaker 6: a sorority in college, and I go, you know, don't
Speaker 6: you don't. I was like, you, you don't have hair
Speaker 6: like this and not get a bid And like then
Speaker 6: I make fun of my hair color, being like very.
Speaker 1: Fake and very blonde.
Speaker 6: And I fucked it up the other night and I go,
Speaker 6: you don't look like this and not get a bid
Speaker 6: and the audience is like and I was like, I'm vain,
Speaker 6: but not that, you know, Like I just felt like
Speaker 6: I got a lot. But I think when you deliver
Speaker 6: it just strong, then they're on board.
Speaker 3: I wasn't.
Speaker 6: Yeah, like I wasn't expecting for me to say that,
Speaker 6: you know, And I was just like, oh God, normally
Speaker 6: I don't deliver it that way.
Speaker 5: You know, it's okay.
Speaker 1: You can't apologize after I say something like that. Yeah, Like,
Speaker 1: I just kept going.
Speaker 3: And you're a.
Speaker 4: Blonde and I feel like blondes are more confident than brunettes,
Speaker 4: and it's just gonna throw it out there it should
Speaker 4: be not right, But I think blondes are more confident. Yeah,
Speaker 4: but that's because society like uplifts them exactly.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I think brunettes yeah, And I think it's good
Speaker 6: to like play that role on stage, you know. I
Speaker 6: do think too, Like for commercial casting, I feel like,
Speaker 6: if they want a female who seems friendly and accessible
Speaker 6: and non threatening, it's always going to be a brunette
Speaker 6: or a red head. It's never going to be a block.
Speaker 3: Really.
Speaker 2: I feel like when the Disney when the Disney Channel
Speaker 2: kids go through their like rebellious phase, they dye their
Speaker 2: hair darker, like that's their like their rockstar like day
Speaker 2: black dudes now.
Speaker 5: Right, Well, I.
Speaker 1: Mean I think that's true.
Speaker 6: I feel like if you have just a random like
Speaker 6: if you're casting a random commercial of like a family
Speaker 6: or like you know, you want someone to be the
Speaker 6: face of a brand, I just feel like often it's
Speaker 6: going to be a brunett or a red head.
Speaker 2: Because like that's so crazy that you think that, because
Speaker 2: I feel like blondes are everywhere.
Speaker 6: Really, yes, maybe I'm just trying to justify why I
Speaker 6: never get work.
Speaker 5: That's what's.
Speaker 1: It's just the hair color of God.
Speaker 5: I guess it's not that I have no talent, And
Speaker 5: it was.
Speaker 4: The hair color bit you would diet, okay right now,
Speaker 4: and I.
Speaker 1: Go back to that dark brown.
Speaker 3: Yea god.
Speaker 6: I remember the morning so I died my hair dark brown.
Speaker 6: I went to this bar, no one recognized me, and
Speaker 6: I remember the next morning I woke up and you know,
Speaker 6: my hair was like in my face, and you know
Speaker 6: that what beat when you're sort of disoriented and you're
Speaker 6: like where am I. I remember looking at my hair
Speaker 6: on my pillow and I was like, oh gross, there's
Speaker 6: a brunette in my bad And then I was like
Speaker 6: I was like and I immediately knew I'd made a mistake,
Speaker 6: but like it was like I didn't I'd gone to
Speaker 6: my mom's colorist. It was a very special thing, you know,
Speaker 6: Like I didn't have any money really, so like I
Speaker 6: was just stuck with it for.
Speaker 1: Months how long I think I had it? Like that
Speaker 1: was ripe. That was like Christmas time, and that's a terrible.
Speaker 3: Time to die. I feel like die.
Speaker 2: Like wintertime is when you go dark though summertimes springtime
Speaker 2: is when you like lighten it back.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but because the winter is so like cold and dry,
Speaker 4: it drives out your hair, and I feel like that's
Speaker 4: just a terrible time.
Speaker 6: I know, and like that's when I'm pasty as hell
Speaker 6: and so like brown hair wasn't.
Speaker 1: Doing any favors, you know.
Speaker 6: Nay, in the winter, I go red, usually not this winter,
Speaker 6: but usually go red in the winter because I like
Speaker 6: that it's fun, it's.
Speaker 1: A little softer.
Speaker 6: Although red is the quickest, it's the diet fades the
Speaker 6: quickest of any dye.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like a redhead, though red hair, like Amy Adams red.
Speaker 4: They give red heads a hard time, but every redhead
Speaker 4: that I've like encountered or been friends with a one
Speaker 4: stunning and just like they photograph really well.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and it's just a sort of an unexpected look,
Speaker 6: you know. I feel like you really do stand out.
Speaker 6: For as much as like I think blondes get a
Speaker 6: lot of glory, I feel like redheads that's sort of
Speaker 6: the sleeper cell, you know of just like you stand out.
Speaker 1: It's a different look, and.
Speaker 2: I feel like it goes with any eye color, yeah,
Speaker 2: green eyes or.
Speaker 4: Gray eyes or and don't have some red hair with
Speaker 4: some freckles, bitch.
Speaker 3: I will marry you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, Yeah, just a light not like a light, smattering, smattering.
Speaker 2: God man, I'm a blonde who has a lot of.
Speaker 5: Mold hot stuff.
Speaker 4: So, Lena, how's your dating life as a blonde? How's
Speaker 4: it doing it?
Speaker 5: Does?
Speaker 1: I did pretty well? I like to think work.
Speaker 3: You see.
Speaker 4: She didn't hold back on that, bitch, I'm doing dig down,
Speaker 4: No problem me, dig down.
Speaker 5: Are you dating somebody right now?
Speaker 6: No, I'm like, okay, I'm exploring.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I've been like casually seeing some people.
Speaker 3: People I love it.
Speaker 1: Yes, none of them drive trucks right now?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 6: No, no, no, yeah, I'm no, not no more truck drivers.
Speaker 6: That was sort of a strange, strange thing, and like, yeah,
Speaker 6: it was odd, but yeah, I was dating a dude
Speaker 6: over the summer that was pretty serious and that didn't
Speaker 6: work out. So now I'm just kind of like, you know,
Speaker 6: as i'd love to say, easy come.
Speaker 3: Easy, go easy.
Speaker 6: Well, yes, it just it was one of those relationships
Speaker 6: where it was like so intense, so fat, yeah, which
Speaker 6: like the notebook, Yeah, it's always just an indicator like ye,
Speaker 6: this is never gonna work.
Speaker 1: And it was like and then I think we both.
Speaker 6: Tried to like take our foot off the gas, and
Speaker 6: I was like we should break up, and he was like,
Speaker 6: no it stay together. But like you know, when it
Speaker 6: just it just was too much, too.
Speaker 4: Soon, that pompcash good girl, Yeah that's what it is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, gosh, you're.
Speaker 3: Doing great now. Wait does it matches your top matches?
Speaker 5: Does a carpet match today?
Speaker 1: No, of course not. What does it look like a
Speaker 1: blonde up top junk down?
Speaker 5: Blosso showed me a picture, not anybody.
Speaker 6: God, the record between us downs.
Speaker 1: Don't you feel bad for redheads for that reason? Firecrotch?
Speaker 3: Probably not. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I've also never slept with somebody who was a ginger,
Speaker 2: so I don't know what their pubes look like.
Speaker 3: Me neither, I've never.
Speaker 2: I've never just like nestled in some fiery Andrew, have
Speaker 2: you ever dated somebody who had run here? Received clay
Speaker 2: an't do it his knees.
Speaker 6: The Claymates are proud. Remember his fan base was the Claymates.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, oh my god, Clay Achin has a
Speaker 2: big dick.
Speaker 3: Wow, I'm thoroughly surprised.
Speaker 6: But you know what I feel like, that's often how
Speaker 6: it goes. The dudes who seem like they would have
Speaker 6: a big dick never do. And the dudes who were
Speaker 6: low key. It's like wealth too. I feel like the
Speaker 6: more showy people are with their wealth, the more they're
Speaker 6: like barely getting by.
Speaker 1: And the real rich people drive frigging shitty cats like cars.
Speaker 5: Yeah, or Volvos.
Speaker 6: Rich people love an old Volva a classic?
Speaker 2: Yes, Oh my god, wow, have we verified that this
Speaker 2: is klay Akin's dick? Was like, yourses, no, he did not,
Speaker 2: and you're a liar. I need to see her seats
Speaker 2: wi Clay Achin sent you a picture of his dick?
Speaker 5: Let me see, let me see.
Speaker 1: You're a millennial.
Speaker 2: You could have photoshopped at Oh wow, yeah, you have
Speaker 2: face tune on your bitch.
Speaker 3: Don't you do that? And it went over episode?
Speaker 1: When did When did klay a Can send you a
Speaker 1: picture of his dick?
Speaker 3: S I girl.
Speaker 6: Wow, yus, Oh my god, Joseph. He's in Joseph in
Speaker 6: the Magic Technically dream Coat.
Speaker 2: Right. My roommate went to see that. She said it
Speaker 2: was awful. Oh my god, it was so bad that
Speaker 2: it was good.
Speaker 4: Should I tell Clay aching In this, I think, and
Speaker 4: then we'll have him on the podcast to see if
Speaker 4: it's all true.
Speaker 5: Yeah, did you send him your dick?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Show us that two way street, and.
Speaker 3: It's it's just all in the office. It's fine, it's
Speaker 3: between us.
Speaker 2: Yea space spaces all the time.
Speaker 1: Do you get a lot of dick pics?
Speaker 6: I've gotten a fair number. I got one from like
Speaker 6: a dude who is like of like, I hardly know
Speaker 6: this guy. He's more of a family friend.
Speaker 3: Wow, that's rude.
Speaker 6: It was so crazy, and it was like I just
Speaker 6: remember so vividly I had I'd moved to New York
Speaker 6: only a few years prior, and like I woke up
Speaker 6: on a Friday morning and he sent me just like
Speaker 6: like no context, we weren't even messaging, just a picture
Speaker 6: of his dick at like five am on a Thursday,
Speaker 6: Like what are you doing?
Speaker 2: How did you respond? Because maybe he's trying to send
Speaker 2: it to somebody else.
Speaker 6: I don't even I didn't even respond.
Speaker 5: I'm trying to send it to somebody else.
Speaker 4: That's says definitely, it hasn't happened to me, but I
Speaker 4: know it's happened to other people. And then I don't
Speaker 4: know if I've sent messages by accident.
Speaker 3: I know I could have sent a picture.
Speaker 1: I know I've sent messages by accident for sure.
Speaker 6: If I'm like in the thick of messaging with someone
Speaker 6: and then someone sort of pops in.
Speaker 2: The thing that I'll do is our screenshot, so or
Speaker 2: I will copy and paste, or like I'll screenshot something
Speaker 2: and then just send it to like Sydney or somebody
Speaker 2: else and accidentally send the screenshot to the person And
Speaker 2: then they'd be like what And I'd be like, I
Speaker 2: want to make sure you saw just in case you
Speaker 2: could just you can't see what you just said, be like, oh, yeah.
Speaker 3: It was that crazy.
Speaker 6: It was a great exponage, like trying to make sure
Speaker 6: that you see how you look to other.
Speaker 5: People, right right.
Speaker 2: But they'd be like, look at this dumbest Oh my god,
Speaker 2: that's amazing.
Speaker 6: Wait, so have you guys ever like how much I'm
Speaker 6: always curious because blonde costs so much money?
Speaker 3: Do you like?
Speaker 6: But I always wonder if it lots more money than
Speaker 6: your average hair color? Like I mean, I feel like
Speaker 6: you guys died my well, I mean just as far
Speaker 6: as like money you spend on hair.
Speaker 5: Like I do to a salon like that, how much
Speaker 5: does it cost to like to color your hair?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 6: If you do, I used to go to this one
Speaker 6: guy I had the same color ass for like seven years.
Speaker 5: Colorist.
Speaker 2: Sounds like such a wealthy thing to have my coloriss
Speaker 2: my therapist.
Speaker 3: Also, I know it does.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah he's colorless.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know he's classes and colors and colorists. Yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: He used to do.
Speaker 6: This was back when I would do full like full
Speaker 6: head of highlights and a haircut. It would take me
Speaker 6: like three hours on a Saturday, like all that around
Speaker 6: like four hundred four to fifty.
Speaker 2: And then the touch up is how much like to
Speaker 2: just get the like the roots touched up?
Speaker 1: I mean it depends on the salon.
Speaker 6: Now I'm smarter about it and I'll do like half
Speaker 6: head and that and like one fifty. But that's like
Speaker 6: mostly with a discount girl.
Speaker 3: You couldn't real close to.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a lot, but like how much the braids cost?
Speaker 4: Well, shutout to Mina and money giving me a pricess
Speaker 4: that works for me.
Speaker 1: It's a sliding sale like my therapy.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it's expensive. I just looked online and some
Speaker 4: girls spent like eight hundred dollars on her braids.
Speaker 5: Eight hundred dollars and it looked beautiful.
Speaker 1: But no, I've never paid more than one hundred dollars
Speaker 1: to get my hair braided.
Speaker 6: Really yeah, but.
Speaker 4: I don't that's not a Mina Amani's price.
Speaker 1: Point though those are braids.
Speaker 2: Well, I so I'm getting my hair. I'm getting a
Speaker 2: wash and a blowout and a trim tomorrow. And they
Speaker 2: were like, uh, it's a it's ninety dollars for a
Speaker 2: junior stylist. And I was like, a junior stylist and
Speaker 2: how much is the and they were like and then
Speaker 2: it's more like for a senior stylist, So one hundred
Speaker 2: and thirty dollars to start, and then you know you
Speaker 2: got to do boom. Yeah, you know they're gonna throw
Speaker 2: in a deep conditioner or you're like, actually it's gonna
Speaker 2: be but it is a new it's a natural hair
Speaker 2: salon that I'm trying tomorrow, so we'll see how I
Speaker 2: feel on Sunday. But yeah, they were like she was like,
Speaker 2: it's one thirty for a senior stylist. That's where we start.
Speaker 2: And I was like for a wash, trim, trim, yeah yeah,
Speaker 2: And they're like, will you be needing other treatments and
Speaker 2: I was like, we'll see when I get there.
Speaker 1: Exactly, so I feel but also it's the New York expense.
Speaker 6: Like when I first moved to New York, I would
Speaker 6: take a bus back to Boston to go to the
Speaker 6: old rest.
Speaker 3: No, that don't sound right.
Speaker 4: I took a bus to get to my color Yes, yeah,
Speaker 4: I'm wrong with you, Coloriss.
Speaker 5: You can afford to not take a bus.
Speaker 4: Hold on, wait, no, you know what I'm wrong Because
Speaker 4: when I went to school in western Massachusetts, I would
Speaker 4: go home to get my hair done, see, and then
Speaker 4: I would go to Long Island to.
Speaker 3: Get my hair done. Wow.
Speaker 4: I would go to the city, go to Long Island
Speaker 4: to get my hair wow.
Speaker 3: So I get some of it.
Speaker 6: It's not even I mean, some of it's about price,
Speaker 6: but some of it is when someone does it righty,
Speaker 6: Like I've gone. I've gone so many colorists, and I've
Speaker 6: been like, I like a yellow blonde. I know you
Speaker 6: think I'm trash. This is what I want. Listen to me,
Speaker 6: and then they'll do like a whitish blonde. So this
Speaker 6: woman in the in Boston, she like would listen to me,
Speaker 6: so I would go back to her. And she was
Speaker 6: such a Boston character, Like the salon was like rinky
Speaker 6: dank in Somerville, and she would had this great Boston accent.
Speaker 6: She'd always be like, like, you know, the dye would
Speaker 6: be setting her or like I'd just be sitting there waiting,
Speaker 6: and she'd always be on the cell phone of their
Speaker 6: mom being like Mom, Mom, go to stopping shop, get
Speaker 6: some lobsters, some Shodeneys hanging out later. And I was
Speaker 6: just like just sitting lobster, Like, Mom, get lobsters and
Speaker 6: shot stop.
Speaker 1: Get him at the stop.
Speaker 6: I'm not a car, he's a I just love said
Speaker 6: so much.
Speaker 2: I like it because it's funny. Yeah, oh, I agree,
Speaker 2: it's hilarious to me. Why do you not have that accent?
Speaker 6: Okay, real talk, because the Boston accent is like socioeconomic
Speaker 6: kind of you know, and so like I I grew
Speaker 6: up in a town called Weston, where like no one
Speaker 6: has the accent. Next door is a town called Waltham
Speaker 6: that's like a little more built up, like it has
Speaker 6: like high rise buildings, you know, more stuff, and people
Speaker 6: have the Boston accent there.
Speaker 1: So it's like, really it's sort of based on where
Speaker 1: you grew up.
Speaker 6: But then after college, I lived in South Boston for
Speaker 6: three years, and like Southie natives have the accent. But
Speaker 6: there's also two Boston accents. There's like the Kennedy one,
Speaker 6: which is like you know, Joe ask not what you
Speaker 6: all control for your follow mom, which like my parents generation,
Speaker 6: my parents generation have it. Yeah, it's like the older Bostonians.
Speaker 6: And then there's the younger Bostonians who are like Facio,
Speaker 6: like you know, like get me, like go to stop
Speaker 6: and shop, get me Shadonay's lobsters, like give me a
Speaker 6: fucking wallet packed the cat, Yeah.
Speaker 5: Give me your wallet.
Speaker 3: Can people at how crime? Yeah?
Speaker 2: I would just if somebody said that to me in
Speaker 2: that accent, I would laugh until they walked away.
Speaker 1: I'd be like, are you related to Mark Wahlberg?
Speaker 2: Macky Mac? So what happened something? There was a robbery
Speaker 2: or something?
Speaker 6: Well yeah, yeah, yes, speaking of Boston robberies, Yeah, I
Speaker 6: had years ago.
Speaker 1: I was living in New York at the time, but
Speaker 1: I did. I did get.
Speaker 6: Robbed on Newberry Street in Boston, which is insane.
Speaker 1: Do you has know Newberry Street?
Speaker 4: It's like very nice, all the shops, It's like that's
Speaker 4: the place. That's a lot of time in Boston. And wait,
Speaker 4: you went to college in school and I had to
Speaker 4: like escape on the weekend to go to Boston.
Speaker 3: With the prop proper folks who were very racist.
Speaker 6: But what yeah, that's got troublesome history with troublesome is
Speaker 6: that what we call it trouble?
Speaker 3: Trouble is the new problematic.
Speaker 5: Troublesome?
Speaker 1: God, wait, where'd you go to school in Worcester?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, I feel like we've talked about this probably
Speaker 2: that's so crazy. I forgot that Boston was in Massachusetts.
Speaker 2: I was like, why are we talking about where they
Speaker 2: went to school? Were talking about Boston right now? Yeah,
Speaker 2: I got it.
Speaker 6: But yeah I got mugged on Newberry Street, which is
Speaker 6: in saying because it is the nicest street. But it
Speaker 6: was the night before Thanksgiving and it's like it's all shops,
Speaker 6: so it's really a daytime street. It's like for daytime shopping,
Speaker 6: daytime walking around.
Speaker 3: But it is beautiful to go at nights. They have
Speaker 3: like heads and everything. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 6: It's like right near the near like Boston Common, which
Speaker 6: has the public garden. Like it's just a beautiful area,
Speaker 6: really nicely like built out. It's like the one area
Speaker 6: of Boston that like makes sense because it was built
Speaker 6: the last so it's built like a grid. But yeah,
Speaker 6: so Boilston is next door to it and the parallel
Speaker 6: to it, and that has like a ton of bars
Speaker 6: on it, more restaurants, night life, and so my best
Speaker 6: friend and I went to a restaurant on Newbery and
Speaker 6: then we're walking out and we're going to We're gonna
Speaker 6: go to my high school reunion. And this was like hilarious.
Speaker 6: So this was like ten years after we graduated high school,
Speaker 6: I think, yeah it was. And we're walking down Newberry
Speaker 6: Street and this guy is coming toward us on a
Speaker 6: bike and we're both like done up for a night out.
Speaker 1: And Suzanne my best friend from.
Speaker 6: Georgia and find his Boston clothes on exact Yeah, We're
Speaker 6: all like hey, like cute tight jeans, high heels, and
Speaker 6: Susanne and I look very similar. People used to think
Speaker 6: we were twins, which I think is just because we're
Speaker 6: like two white women who are blonde, you know, in.
Speaker 5: My mind as twins Barricade and Ashley.
Speaker 6: So we're like two blonde heads Bob and and and
Speaker 6: we're walking down the street and this kid's coming bat
Speaker 6: us on a bike or this like teenage guy, and
Speaker 6: so we go single file so he can bike by us,
Speaker 6: and as he comes by me, he just scoops my
Speaker 6: purse out of my hand.
Speaker 3: Now what kind of purse was it?
Speaker 2: It was? It was like a Kate Spade.
Speaker 3: Purse.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I was like, do I look like I have money?
Speaker 1: Because I don't, Like I don't.
Speaker 6: I mean, but it was one of those persons where
Speaker 6: it's like a circle, like a metal circle, and then
Speaker 6: the bag hangs below.
Speaker 3: It wasn't a strap.
Speaker 6: In your hand, not like the crook of your arm exactly.
Speaker 6: And now it's I'm showing back person, how are you?
Speaker 6: I think because normally I would wear it like usually. Yeah,
Speaker 6: but I think I just because I think when I
Speaker 6: tucked behind Suzanne so he could go by, I was like, oh,
Speaker 6: let me get out of the way. And but yeah,
Speaker 6: I mean talk about like looking you know, like just
Speaker 6: an easy target. So he just scoops my purse and
Speaker 6: I remember, like you know when you have that moment
Speaker 6: where you're like, just be happy you have your life,
Speaker 6: you know, like it's just things.
Speaker 2: All the way.
Speaker 4: I need my twelve dollars and I need you know,
Speaker 4: I got my passport and said I don't have my
Speaker 4: actual idea, so no, no, no, we gonna need.
Speaker 3: You to come up my bag.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 6: I remember I was about to start a new job
Speaker 6: in New York and I needed my ID to get
Speaker 6: on the bus back and like all these things, I
Speaker 6: was like wait, no, yeah, and so I turned and
Speaker 6: I'm wearing high heels. So I turned on my heel
Speaker 6: and I tried to chasing.
Speaker 5: A sturdy Steve Madden, a sturdy Jessica Simpson se.
Speaker 3: Lena, you look like the type to run after your attacker.
Speaker 3: Thank you. Yeah.
Speaker 6: It's so funny because I think that he maybe saw
Speaker 6: these two blonde chicks and was like easy target.
Speaker 1: But I was like, uh, you don't know who I am.
Speaker 6: I've been in a number of number of scrapes in
Speaker 6: a bar like I will come there, I would get
Speaker 6: my freaking bag. So I turned and I start chasing
Speaker 6: this guy and he's on a bike, and then Suzanne
Speaker 6: Bless her heart, is right behind me. She's calling nine
Speaker 6: one one as we run.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you need Suzanne, you need a good white woman
Speaker 2: in a back calling. I'm not running in a heel,
Speaker 2: though I would have taken a heel off and head.
Speaker 6: But so I started screaming, I'm like help, help, And
Speaker 6: then I truly remembered the episode of Oprah where she says,
Speaker 6: don't ever scream help because no one will help you.
Speaker 1: You scream fire because Oprah taught us that. Yes, it's like,
Speaker 1: don't go to a second location and scream fire.
Speaker 6: Well, I'm gonna let you have that. Yes out to
Speaker 6: Oprah help swinfree. But I remember, like vividly thinking of that.
Speaker 6: I was like, no, think about what Oprah said. So
Speaker 6: then I started, what would Oprah do?
Speaker 1: W didn't.
Speaker 5: Wait, you scream fire?
Speaker 1: I started screaming fire.
Speaker 6: And I'm really drunk because Susanna and I just had
Speaker 6: a bunch of like dirty martinis and wine because we're
Speaker 6: gonna go to o high school union.
Speaker 3: And gives you the energy.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I was like, like, I can't believe how much
Speaker 6: I just like turned on. So I'm like far, like
Speaker 6: I sounded like a shaty doors car bad and it
Speaker 6: was just like so I finally because I used to
Speaker 6: be like I love running, I love working out. I'm
Speaker 6: able to catch up, and I.
Speaker 2: Do love a jobs we do a late night jug
Speaker 2: or an early morning job.
Speaker 3: I know, all alone.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, So I'm able to catch up. To
Speaker 1: the way before the bike he was on a unicycle.
Speaker 1: It was a bike.
Speaker 6: It seemed like a stolen bike because it did not
Speaker 6: fit him, like it was a small children's dirt bike,
Speaker 6: and he was like a large teenager.
Speaker 5: So I think that he was just his knees were
Speaker 5: hitting the Yeah, exactly, why.
Speaker 3: Did you let him pass you? Like, I wouldn't even
Speaker 3: let anyway.
Speaker 1: Like that go buy me.
Speaker 6: Also, like my manners are what got me in trouble,
Speaker 6: you know what I mean. I should have been like
Speaker 6: I don't care to get out of the way.
Speaker 1: I know how many times I've yelled people for riding
Speaker 1: their bike on the sidewalking.
Speaker 6: Was supposed to be on the side.
Speaker 1: There's that bike, and I know, but so yeah.
Speaker 6: So I finally catch up to him and I was
Speaker 6: like what now, Selena, Like you know, like, what was
Speaker 6: the big idea?
Speaker 5: Grab your purse?
Speaker 6: So he is biking here onto the left of me.
Speaker 6: I'm running here. We're still on a pretty tight sidewalk,
Speaker 6: but I'm like, like, right next to him.
Speaker 1: You're in heel. Yes, I even believe it was the
Speaker 1: proudest night of my life. I was like, oh, you
Speaker 1: thought you could fuck because I'm in he's nip so
Speaker 1: i I'm woulda just put my arm out and let
Speaker 1: him like close.
Speaker 6: I know, well that's sort of what I did. I
Speaker 6: just took my fist and I just punched him in
Speaker 6: the chest. Yeah, And he got knocked off balance and
Speaker 6: he was like whoa. And so he starts like his
Speaker 6: bike is like going side to side to side, and
Speaker 6: he's like and at this point, I'm like, oh, he's
Speaker 6: about to eat shit into my running lane. So he
Speaker 6: does he like his bike. He just goes down and
Speaker 6: the bike just bust into my running lane like and
Speaker 6: it all happened so quickly, but thankfully I used to
Speaker 6: do figure skating and tumbling. Ah, so literally as the
Speaker 6: bike bust into my lane, I'm like.
Speaker 5: So I shut it. I do not I stick the
Speaker 5: land it has to go in. The pilot's know, this
Speaker 5: sound like cocaine.
Speaker 1: This a whole thing.
Speaker 5: Sounds like you did a line and you was read insane.
Speaker 3: Was practice.
Speaker 5: She was just curse.
Speaker 3: The only times was when I was high.
Speaker 4: When I was a limitsar limousine a jar into cocaine
Speaker 4: like yo, let's just she was chasing her gap purse
Speaker 4: because it had cocaine in. It's not an id for
Speaker 4: the job or to protect the family, Okay, And the
Speaker 4: family is the cocaine falls off, you tell me to
Speaker 4: stick the.
Speaker 1: Landing, exactly, stick the landing, and then we continue on foot,
Speaker 1: and I.
Speaker 6: Was like what and so yeah, I was just like
Speaker 6: what do you want? Like I would have just I
Speaker 6: would have just jumped on the bikes. It was all
Speaker 6: like happening so quickly. And then meanwhile this like couple
Speaker 6: saw it all go down, so they like joined in
Speaker 6: the crime parade behind us. Like it was like these
Speaker 6: people were sort.
Speaker 2: Of like, I mean, there were they're like a marathon,
Speaker 2: you know, marathons real late this year, and there were
Speaker 2: somebody at the end passing that water.
Speaker 1: Do you he has of any orange smiles, gatorade things?
Speaker 6: But so so then we continue on foot and at
Speaker 6: this point I was just like so angry and amped
Speaker 6: up that I was like.
Speaker 1: It's a fucking gap purse, you idiot. I was like,
Speaker 1: I work in publishing by day. There's nothing in there.
Speaker 6: And he we run a couple more, a couple of blocks,
Speaker 6: and then I think this guy is like, my bike
Speaker 6: is back there and that's worth more than this gap purse.
Speaker 6: So he takes my purse, he throws it into a bush,
Speaker 6: and he then crosses over in Newbury Street to go
Speaker 6: back to get his bike, and so I am able
Speaker 6: to Sarah's now on.
Speaker 1: Chance, like hey it is.
Speaker 6: It's like I'm in pop will Is.
Speaker 2: So I go.
Speaker 1: I grab my purse and thankfully it's this purse that
Speaker 1: I loved.
Speaker 2: But the the.
Speaker 1: Zipper always stuck.
Speaker 6: It was really hard to get open because as you're running,
Speaker 6: I was wondering if he was going to be undoing
Speaker 6: the zipper to try to just get my wallet to
Speaker 6: toss the bag, you know, like, so I assume that
Speaker 6: all my stuff wouldn't be in there. Thankfully, the zipper sucks,
Speaker 6: so he couldn't even get it open, so everything is
Speaker 6: still in there.
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yes, I like, I like have a quick cigarette because
Speaker 1: I was like.
Speaker 3: You had that one stove. You had a stogy.
Speaker 1: Quick because Suzan's like Boston p D's on the way and.
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, She's like donate them.
Speaker 1: I was like, take care of bins on my own.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: So in the purse you had like a tampon without
Speaker 3: a wrapper on it.
Speaker 6: Sure cigarette, yeah, some like cover girl makeup cigarettes, some.
Speaker 1: Girl makeup, a wold mascara.
Speaker 2: It was all like shit, that really like all easily,
Speaker 2: you know, and some Claire's accessories.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, yeah, it was like a choker.
Speaker 6: Yes, it was like such tacky stuff. And I think
Speaker 6: I had like twelve dollars cash like nothing, you know
Speaker 6: what I mean. Like and at this point, I think
Speaker 6: my credit card was maxed out.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 6: It's just like.
Speaker 5: Felicia, she did him a favorite right now.
Speaker 6: I think it was one of those things where like
Speaker 6: you just if an adjustice happens to you, you want
Speaker 6: to fight, you know, and you're like, oh hey, Universe
Speaker 6: gave me an excuse to get.
Speaker 3: And Marie are like, I'm going home. I'll figure out listen. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I don't have any money in that person that one bit. Okay.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I still I can't wear that purse because it
Speaker 6: just feels like it's bad juju.
Speaker 1: You know I still haven't you still I'm kind of
Speaker 1: a pack rap.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I still have.
Speaker 6: Like when I mean when all the nineties like clutches
Speaker 6: are chokers, chokers came back, I was like, I still
Speaker 6: got my high school ones and I still wear them
Speaker 6: and they are from Claire's. But yeah, so Boston p
Speaker 6: D showed up and they were like so frigging Boston,
Speaker 6: Like I mean, it was almost like hilarious, like they
Speaker 6: just they it was a lot of unmarked Crown Victorias, which,
Speaker 6: like unmarked Crown Vics are so obviously cop cars, Like
Speaker 6: I always wonder, I'm like, who thinks there are not
Speaker 6: identified as a cop? You know, well in New York
Speaker 6: You're like that might be a cab, right, but yeah, yeah,
Speaker 6: anywhere else, old.
Speaker 5: Ass cop cars, yeah exactly.
Speaker 6: And they were like and I get like they thought
Speaker 6: the whole thing was just kind of crazy, you know,
Speaker 6: and they were like so frigging boss, and you could
Speaker 6: like smell the ductadnus on their breath, like they're like, miss,
Speaker 6: I'm trying to ascertain what happened here?
Speaker 1: Uh, A perpetrator approached, You took your pocket balk.
Speaker 6: They only call it pocket walk in Boston, and he's like,
Speaker 6: you gave chase, Uh, you got back your pocket book.
Speaker 1: Perpetrated fled on foot and then got his bicycle.
Speaker 3: Is that right?
Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, that's pretty much what happened.
Speaker 1: And it was so cute.
Speaker 6: They're like, you got a bunch of brothers at home
Speaker 6: because you've got a lot of hustle in you. And
Speaker 6: I was like, no, no, brothers at home.
Speaker 5: Just get I wouldn't think that you did.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 1: No, I'm the youngest of three girls, after the youngest.
Speaker 3: That's the Boston to Toiola right there, you got a
Speaker 3: lot of brothers.
Speaker 6: I was like, oh my god, but yeah, and it
Speaker 6: like it was the strangest thing. And then we were
Speaker 6: supposed to go to my high school reunion, but I
Speaker 6: was like, I can't go to high school reunion, right, you.
Speaker 1: Know, I just felt so like keyed up. So we
Speaker 1: just like left and went back to our like where
Speaker 1: we go.
Speaker 3: You know, you looked crazy.
Speaker 1: Care was the mess.
Speaker 4: You didn't broke the hill and that's why you couldn't
Speaker 4: go to her Express Blazer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and like that would just be so like if
Speaker 1: I walked into my high school you and be like,
Speaker 1: I just.
Speaker 7: Got my dad wants exactly like she hasn't changed at all,
Speaker 7: you know, for a change of pace, I'm gonna not
Speaker 7: be loud and I'm gonna go home.
Speaker 2: I would have went to the reunion, Yeah, bitch, we
Speaker 2: would celebrate. I would have had the cops drop me
Speaker 2: off at the reunion. Yeah, drop me up in a
Speaker 2: cruiser place than absolutely, don't even stop.
Speaker 4: We'll roll right out, like, bitch, I got my bag
Speaker 4: and I'm skinnier than all yours.
Speaker 3: That's what I row. I know, it was nuts.
Speaker 6: And then that Boston p D followed up a couple
Speaker 6: of days later and they were like, you know, we're
Speaker 6: very we're glad that nothing happened to you, but don't
Speaker 6: ever fucking do that again.
Speaker 1: And they're like, if he had a gun.
Speaker 6: You would be dead right now, yeah, you know, which
Speaker 6: is true. Like, and that's what I think is so
Speaker 6: tricky about. I think it's so important for women or
Speaker 6: like to be able to fight back and defend yourself.
Speaker 6: But like, if there's a gun, all bets are off,
Speaker 6: you know, and you never know who's crazy. It sounds
Speaker 6: like it happened so fast too, like and he it is.
Speaker 2: It doesn't sound like he was that he had the
Speaker 2: biking control at all, because oh yeah, I mean, in
Speaker 2: my mind, if he had a gun and he was
Speaker 2: on the bike and he had the purse, he would
Speaker 2: have dropped one of those exactly.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 6: And it seemed like a high school or maybe just
Speaker 6: trying to impress his friends or you know, like it
Speaker 6: wasn't like this like crime operation that was well thought out.
Speaker 6: You know, like he seemed like kind of a dumb
Speaker 6: dumb How many.
Speaker 5: Block did you run because it sounds like you ran
Speaker 5: a marathon at.
Speaker 6: The end of the day. I think it was like
Speaker 6: six or seven blocks.
Speaker 5: Like it was all so quest Selena.
Speaker 3: I just want to shout out your blonde endurance. Okay,
Speaker 3: thank you.
Speaker 2: You had the salmina to keep running no red lights. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you just kept running for seven blocks. You had the
Speaker 2: walk sign the entire time. Well, it was pretty empty.
Speaker 6: I remember it just being very eerily dead on Newbury
Speaker 6: Street because Newbury Street's more of a daytime street and
Speaker 6: like for whatever. Yeah, I mean that's one thing it's
Speaker 6: sort of remarkable to me, is like, how were we
Speaker 6: just going going going?
Speaker 5: You guys were just going in a circle. He just
Speaker 5: kept turning lift.
Speaker 1: I felt like I just had blinders on.
Speaker 3: I was like, ah, you know, it was say crazy.
Speaker 4: I honestly believe it's because you're blonde that I feel
Speaker 4: like the stunt happened because it was all Oh, if
Speaker 4: it would have been me and Marie, first of all,
Speaker 4: my wig would have flew off, okay, And I'm like, oh,
Speaker 4: I gotta go get that. That's worth more than whatever
Speaker 4: priority priority, and then it was like, I'm not running,
Speaker 4: but I probably would have one a flat sneaker could.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Also I didn't take tumble and a figure skating that
Speaker 2: we all getting trapped in that absolutely trying into.
Speaker 3: Like a like a rocky and bowling hole and just
Speaker 3: rolling down the street. Yeah, just rolling down the street.
Speaker 6: But I do think, yeah, I think we looked like
Speaker 6: two blonde dummies from the suburbs. Yeah, you know, And
Speaker 6: that's one thing I sort of love about Suzanne, my
Speaker 6: best friend from childhood, Like we have a lot of
Speaker 6: stories like that, if like just like random ship going down,
Speaker 6: and I think it's because people don't expect us to
Speaker 6: be tough or be able to defend ourselves and that
Speaker 6: we'll be dormats, and I like that I'm not.
Speaker 2: You know, I love that. I'm so glad that you
Speaker 2: got your gap person.
Speaker 1: It was the greatest man.
Speaker 3: You can you just take a picture of a bag
Speaker 3: and it will we can put.
Speaker 6: It's a cute bag and it also has a lining
Speaker 6: inside that's like star pattern on it, which I love.
Speaker 3: A star pattern lining.
Speaker 4: Can you tell me like some things that are very
Speaker 4: connected to being blonde, Like you said you're into candles.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what she wanted to talk about for I'm
Speaker 2: glad you guys talked to me out of it.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Marie's like, Marie's like.
Speaker 6: We do not have an hour on candle Yeah, and.
Speaker 1: I didn't even say anything.
Speaker 3: I was like, y'all gonna figure it up.
Speaker 1: I realize that's dumb, but I'm not.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I talk about it.
Speaker 6: I love I call myself a candle head. I love candles,
Speaker 6: and I do have a podcast, but our episodes are
Speaker 6: only thirty minutes. Okay, but it's called two wik minimum
Speaker 6: and it's just candle talk. We talk about candle controversies.
Speaker 6: Different set is.
Speaker 5: What's an example of a candle controversy?
Speaker 6: Oh, Reddy, I'm curious to see where you guys weigh
Speaker 6: in on this. The scent of vanilla. I love it, okay, interesting,
Speaker 6: A lot of people hate it.
Speaker 4: What do you think, Sidney Well, I grew up on
Speaker 4: vanilla candles, uh bathom yeah secret?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I know, like my fragrances with a hint of
Speaker 5: vanilla like in them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like a like a warm musky kind of yeah,
Speaker 1: oh hear that.
Speaker 2: I like it, but not sweet. I don't like sweet perfume.
Speaker 2: Like I'm not like I can't wear like a juicy
Speaker 2: catoure or like the like sweet like bath and body
Speaker 2: work perfumes. But like I like, you know, like a
Speaker 2: Dior with like a hint of vanilla sent bird come
Speaker 2: on bird.
Speaker 6: Recurring the sandal would kind of scent, right, sandal Wood
Speaker 6: is sort of like like a nice mature musky I do.
Speaker 5: I also do like a little musk.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like is this a unisex fragrance?
Speaker 3: I like that, but I'm just gonna do it out here.
Speaker 3: I'm not proud of it, but I got it. Elizabeth Arden,
Speaker 3: Oh White Tea.
Speaker 2: Oh Sydney spread into her braids in the studio. That
Speaker 2: is all the way close.
Speaker 3: I like it.
Speaker 5: M I don't know, I don't really like it's nice.
Speaker 2: It's like it's nice, but then the at the tail
Speaker 2: end of it, like it smells good at the top,
Speaker 2: and then after it's like it fades into something that
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 6: But vanilla is a controversial candle scent because no thank you,
Speaker 6: no thanks. But it's because I think like like some
Speaker 6: of my sorority sisters in college would burn one that
Speaker 6: was like vanilla icing.
Speaker 1: It was like like sweet, like sugar smell like diabetes exactly.
Speaker 6: And that is like, you know, like the Henry Bendela
Speaker 6: has this candle called vanilla Bean. That's nice because it's
Speaker 6: like a high class vanilla bean. It's not like, yeah,
Speaker 6: like vanilla cookie or something. It's like, you know, more
Speaker 6: of a not as sweet.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you're doing well.
Speaker 4: But now I walk in there and they immediately look
Speaker 4: at me like are you dropping something off?
Speaker 5: They'd be like are you a carrier? They'd be like
Speaker 5: the freight entrances.
Speaker 2: That is.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Now the scene is this In January fifteenth, the entire
Speaker 6: like their brick and mortar stores, everything, they just closed
Speaker 6: up shop. So that's the only way I was able
Speaker 6: to get Henry Bendel candles because they had him on
Speaker 6: super duper sale.
Speaker 5: We missed the same I know.
Speaker 6: I was trying to alert people online on social media.
Speaker 6: I was like everyone candleheads stuck up.
Speaker 3: Brugal blonde, I love it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I try.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not a dumb blonde. I try to
Speaker 1: get bargains and the handsome.
Speaker 3: You should write another book called a Blonde on a Budget.
Speaker 1: Ooh, that's a good ideas in pilot and book.
Speaker 3: Are you trying to be an agent.
Speaker 1: Seriously, I appreciate I'm trying. I appreciate it.
Speaker 6: I help my friend blonde on a budget and I am.
Speaker 6: Last year I got into a dead consolidation program. So
Speaker 6: you guys, have you guys ever.
Speaker 1: Done something like that?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 5: So does that make like the interest rate go up?
Speaker 3: Down?
Speaker 5: Are you pay answer less?
Speaker 6: Yeah, Well, because I had four credit cards and like
Speaker 6: debt on four like it was just out of control,
Speaker 6: and so they consolidate your debt. You basically give your
Speaker 6: debt to a company that like, this is what they do,
Speaker 6: and they consolidate your debt and they negotiate down the
Speaker 6: interest rates and all that, and then you just.
Speaker 1: Pay that monthly. It sounds like talking about blood on
Speaker 1: a budget.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 6: When all that was going down, I was just like
Speaker 6: lots of cans of tune and harbald eggs all day
Speaker 6: every day.
Speaker 2: You know, like gross on a budget. Got to get
Speaker 2: you a rich man, not a guy that wears vists.
Speaker 2: You got to get somebody with money that will like
Speaker 2: pay for stuff.
Speaker 4: I know, have you ever had one of those mister
Speaker 4: burns on the Simpsons situation?
Speaker 1: Years ago?
Speaker 6: I did a guy who was like, had a lot
Speaker 6: of money. I suspect though he was like recently out
Speaker 6: of jail, like.
Speaker 3: Crime or No.
Speaker 1: It seemed to like mafia, which was kind of fun.
Speaker 6: I don't know, you know, like those dudes it was,
Speaker 6: but it was strange, like you took me to a
Speaker 6: lot of really expensive restaurants.
Speaker 1: Pay cash, yes, always everything was cash.
Speaker 3: Yeah, everything was let me get some money for my
Speaker 3: uber come on care yea.
Speaker 6: And he had he and his family had a vending
Speaker 6: machine business, like, oh, drugs yes. So I was like
Speaker 6: to me, I was like, vending machines on the Lower
Speaker 6: East Side. To me, that's mafia.
Speaker 2: That's money laundering right there, Yes, exactly, dig money.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And he didn't know anything about what had happened in
Speaker 1: the world the past five years.
Speaker 3: He lives underneath the rock.
Speaker 5: No, he had just gotten out of jail.
Speaker 1: I was like, how do you not know these things?
Speaker 1: And he's liked and I just don't really pay attention
Speaker 1: to the news. I was like, oh, because you're we
Speaker 1: were in jail. Yeah, because Wi Fi.
Speaker 4: They got Wi Fi in jail, they got internets, Yeah, internets.
Speaker 1: It was weird, but he was in just like really
Speaker 1: good shape too. I don't know, everything about it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so what happened?
Speaker 1: We got some good get this. We dated for a
Speaker 1: while and it was like it was I was sort
Speaker 1: of like, this is.
Speaker 6: Just silly and fun, but I don't mind just going
Speaker 6: on to some nice restaurants, Like Okay, I'll get dressed
Speaker 6: up and.
Speaker 1: Go to the Writs.
Speaker 3: You know you were going to the Ritz Calton.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that went all the way down the Financial District.
Speaker 3: Dreams Drugs.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what did you wear?
Speaker 3: Did you wear like one of the bondage dresses?
Speaker 1: I never had one of those.
Speaker 3: But you love a tube top.
Speaker 2: I feel like you have.
Speaker 3: A tube top and like a.
Speaker 5: Halter altertop with a corkwidge.
Speaker 1: Yes, corkw Yeah, I love cork wedge.
Speaker 2: When wedge season arrives, oh I get so excited. You
Speaker 2: Selena loves a Peepto witch.
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: You love the Jitney like you just get in the
Speaker 4: Jitney just for the travel, Like that's your thing.
Speaker 3: You a very Bradley bag.
Speaker 6: That's one thing I love about hot weather. When it
Speaker 6: gets hot enough where I'm like, I guess I have
Speaker 6: to wear this tubetop. I know, and I feel you'd
Speaker 6: be wearing like a white tube top o some white
Speaker 6: bikinis are my joint. I know when I die, I
Speaker 6: want my ashes. I want, you know, to be cremated,
Speaker 6: and then I want my ashes to be placed into
Speaker 6: a white bikini that it will be used as a
Speaker 6: slingshot to be shot into the sunset a Coney Island
Speaker 6: and Motley crework On and Roses will play thank you.
Speaker 2: This is your last will and testament on this podcast.
Speaker 2: Just so you know, they're going to carry the ashes
Speaker 2: in that gap. Person we get to Cody Island, the
Speaker 2: Sipers gonna get stupp.
Speaker 3: Selena.
Speaker 1: We are writing your show for you, verbally doing the work.
Speaker 3: I appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Imaginative. Before we go, I need to know what happened
Speaker 1: to this mobster?
Speaker 6: Yeah, get this, he just ghosted me.
Speaker 5: No, he says he got locked up.
Speaker 6: I hope he's back, he's dead or I had a
Speaker 6: moment of wondering if he had been like everything had
Speaker 6: been a lie and he was actually married, nut kids
Speaker 6: a Long Island or something.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, niggas don't ghost you for that.
Speaker 4: Then you find out you get caught, They get caught,
Speaker 4: and then you stop talking to them.
Speaker 3: They don't just ghost you. Dudes, won't stop if are
Speaker 3: cheating until they get caught.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 4: There's no reason his wife caught him and Selena didn't.
Speaker 4: What is this Halter doing in my closet?
Speaker 2: Where?
Speaker 5: What is this vanilla ala?
Speaker 1: It was for the best, definitely.
Speaker 5: I mean I'm sorry that you you're not getting those
Speaker 5: fancy meals anymore.
Speaker 1: Now, Oh well, I know I need to get back
Speaker 1: to that kind of that kind of living you do.
Speaker 2: Let people listening where they can, you know, get your
Speaker 2: book where they can follow you on social media?
Speaker 6: Yes, yes, ever all my social media is my full name,
Speaker 6: so it's s E l E n A c O
Speaker 6: P p O c K. And that's my website, Twitter Insta.
Speaker 6: And then I have my Silly n y t vows,
Speaker 6: which is my Twitter instad where I pretend to be
Speaker 6: in the New York Times wadding section.
Speaker 3: Love it.
Speaker 6: My book, The New Roll for Blonds. It's from HarperCollins,
Speaker 6: so they can buy.
Speaker 3: Okay, Harper great, Oh thank you.
Speaker 5: You're doing great.
Speaker 3: But you're doing bad. Yeah, I'm very bad.
Speaker 1: And then my Candle podcast it's on. Uh we did
Speaker 1: season one. Now I'm taking a break and I'm strategizing
Speaker 1: for season two.
Speaker 3: You're trying to figure out more candling about it.
Speaker 6: But it's called two I Commit him and that's on
Speaker 6: iTunes and all that jazz. Yeah, and I have you
Speaker 6: know what away was running around the city. So all
Speaker 6: my dates are on selenacoppic dot com. And thank you
Speaker 6: guys so much for having me.
Speaker 4: This so much fun, fun Selena, And honestly, I didn't
Speaker 4: even think about any of this, like, I didn't think
Speaker 4: this is the way the conversation was going.
Speaker 5: I know, I'm a professional.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much and.
Speaker 5: Shout out to Clay Aikins.
Speaker 3: Dude.
Speaker 1: Listen to you know more bonus episodes on our Patreon.
Speaker 3: Thank you guys for listening.
Speaker 1: Bye Sydney, be best, Bye Forever.
Speaker 5: This has been a Forever Dog production executive produced by
Speaker 5: Brett Boham, Joe ccilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts,
Speaker 5: please visit Foreverdog Podcasts dot com and subscribe to our
Speaker 5: shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify.
Speaker 3: Or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the
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Speaker 1: and liking our page on Facebook.