Speaker 1: I have you trapped. The only way I will not
Speaker 1: do that is if you obey me and do exactly
Speaker 1: what I say. Now, I need you to send another
Speaker 1: picture doing this. If you do not send it within
Speaker 1: twenty four hours, I will release this blackmailed video. So
Speaker 1: that's how it works. That's very common, and most people
Speaker 1: that are trapped in that don't say a word. What's up, everybody?
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the podcast. This is episode one and
Speaker 1: ninety six, and I am grateful to be here with you,
Speaker 1: wherever you're coming from, and however you're watching, whatever platform
Speaker 1: you're coming from, whether that's Spotify or Apple podcast or
Speaker 1: YouTube or any other platform. iHeartRadio. Thank you for being here.
Speaker 1: I answer your questions. You email me Grangersmith Podcast at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com, and I walk through it in long
Speaker 1: podcast form, sometimes maybe too long and sometimes maybe too short.
Speaker 1: I have nothing planned. I have no notes in front
Speaker 1: of me or no quotes or anything compiled. And I
Speaker 1: have also have not read these questions beforehand. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna walk through it. You're gonna hear it as a
Speaker 1: listener the same time that I'm hearing it, and then
Speaker 1: we'll give the best answer that we can. These questions
Speaker 1: could be about anything in life. Really, I've seen it
Speaker 1: all over the place. You just email Grangersmith podcast at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. So let's go to the first one here.
Speaker 1: Subject Cline says curious, and the question says, Hello, granger
Speaker 1: My name is Cindy. I live in Florida. I have
Speaker 1: a quick question for you. Do you respond to comments
Speaker 1: on your podcast that ask us to message you on
Speaker 1: a different platform. I've received that on everything I've commented on.
Speaker 1: Thank you and God blessed. Yeah, Cindy, thanks for emailing.
Speaker 1: I'm glad this is the first one that popped up.
Speaker 1: The answer is never. I'd never ask thank you ever
Speaker 1: on social media or any platform, to go and message
Speaker 1: me on another platform. Right, that's not me. That's a scammer,
Speaker 1: probably from Nigeria. I've actually did a podcast on this
Speaker 1: several years ago, way back in the archives. But they're
Speaker 1: always scamming you. They're trying to scam you. Always look
Speaker 1: for the blue check. It's really important to look for
Speaker 1: that blue check and then just take a quick scan
Speaker 1: over at the page. It's not hard to see what
Speaker 1: a scammer page looks like. It doesn't have a lot
Speaker 1: of followers and it doesn't. It could be cloned. They
Speaker 1: could have posted the same thing, but you could tell
Speaker 1: that there's a lot less activity and there's a lot
Speaker 1: less followers. So look for the blue check and also
Speaker 1: don't follow any kind of blue checked artist or celebrity
Speaker 1: of any kind. Don't ever follow them on a mess
Speaker 1: direct message, or a comment that says, hey, come to
Speaker 1: this other platform and message me there. It's also important
Speaker 1: to never donate to anybody's charity that asks you straight
Speaker 1: from a say an Instagram comment, and says, hey, donate
Speaker 1: here to this certain charity. Also, don't even follow my advice.
Speaker 1: If I'm asking you to donate from a charity, it
Speaker 1: might not be me. So be very careful. I'm never
Speaker 1: going to come to you, and I don't think anyone
Speaker 1: is ever going to come to you that you don't
Speaker 1: personally know in your family that's going to say, hey,
Speaker 1: I have some I got into some financial trouble, can
Speaker 1: you help me out here? Whatever? Tom Cruise is not
Speaker 1: going to tell you that. So anyway, be very careful,
Speaker 1: be very safe out there on You know, we have
Speaker 1: learned in life how to be street smart and not
Speaker 1: walk down a dark alley. You wouldn't do that. So
Speaker 1: we need to learn how to be web smart now
Speaker 1: and learn where those new dark alleys are. Don't go
Speaker 1: down them. It's a good question. I'm glad we started
Speaker 1: with this. Next question, Subdeclin's has exploited. Hey, Grandere'd like
Speaker 1: to remain anonymous. I'm fifteen years old. I'm a boy.
Speaker 1: Made a huge mistake. I sent private videos to what
Speaker 1: I thought was a girl and ended up being a
Speaker 1: sexploitation scheme. I deleted everything and reported it all, and
Speaker 1: nothing has come of it. I'm struggling with the shame
Speaker 1: and embarrassment that I fell into lust. I already prayed
Speaker 1: about it and asked for forgiveness, but I still am
Speaker 1: filled with shame. Just wondering how I could help improve
Speaker 1: excuse me, just how I'm wondering how I could help
Speaker 1: overcome my shame. Thanks love the podcast. Anonymous. Okay, man,
Speaker 1: what a good question to go back to. Back to
Speaker 1: that other question, right, talking about dark alleys on the internet,
Speaker 1: and we have to be aware. Man, that couldn't have
Speaker 1: been timed better. Okay, where do I start with this? Anonymous?
Speaker 1: First of all, fifteen year old boy, thank you for
Speaker 1: being vulnerable. Thank you for being up front about this
Speaker 1: and just voicing this kind of concern that is dealt
Speaker 1: with a lot. And I'm sure a lot of kids
Speaker 1: are going through something like this and they don't know
Speaker 1: who to talk to, and they don't ever bring it up,
Speaker 1: and it never leaves their bedroom or behind four walls
Speaker 1: of their house. So we'll start with that. You're vulnerable
Speaker 1: and you're very brave to come forward. Second of all,
Speaker 1: I think it goes without saying that this is it's
Speaker 1: dangerous to send anything to anybody, even if you know them,
Speaker 1: and much more dangerous if you don't know them. But
Speaker 1: that's not what this question is about. And that's not
Speaker 1: what you need to hear from me, because you already
Speaker 1: know that the hard way, right, You've already learned that lesson.
Speaker 1: There's no need for me to reinforce that with you.
Speaker 1: I do want everybody else that's listening to know and
Speaker 1: to see this and to see that this is a
Speaker 1: real thing, whether you are listening yourself and you could
Speaker 1: be vulnerable to this, or if you have kids and
Speaker 1: you don't know exactly what they're looking at. I say kids,
Speaker 1: and I don't mean that to offend you. If you're fifteen.
Speaker 1: I don't mean that in that way. So if you
Speaker 1: have children that are on their phones, are on a screen,
Speaker 1: and you don't know exactly what they're looking at. I
Speaker 1: want your parents, I want you to remember this that
Speaker 1: they're not entitled to privacy. As long as they're under
Speaker 1: eighteen and living under your roof, they are not entitled
Speaker 1: to privacy. That is something that is earned, and that
Speaker 1: trust is earned. And even when the trust of total
Speaker 1: privacy is earned, that doesn't mean you have to give
Speaker 1: it to them. Okay, because you're the parent, and you
Speaker 1: are you are in desperate need these days to be
Speaker 1: policing this, okay, because you know better, and many times
Speaker 1: they don't. They haven't been exposed to everything that you
Speaker 1: and I know at this point. This is a great
Speaker 1: example of it. Okay, this what is happening to this boy? Really,
Speaker 1: I'll speak to everyone, including you anonymous. This could be
Speaker 1: very dangerous to your own mental health. There are suicides
Speaker 1: that happened because of this. Okay, that needs to be said,
Speaker 1: needs to be addressed. How crazy this could be. And
Speaker 1: it sounds like you're okay, So first of all, let's
Speaker 1: just make sure you're okay and that everything in this
Speaker 1: world can be replaced, including your your self esteem, right,
Speaker 1: if that's what this is about. This could be repaired,
Speaker 1: all this, all of this could be repaired, and no one,
Speaker 1: no one should be able to judge you in a
Speaker 1: way that they say, how could you be so? But
Speaker 1: no one could really say that, because everyone that's a
Speaker 1: human that walks on this earth could be vulnerable to
Speaker 1: something like this if they just don't know, and you
Speaker 1: were trapped, that you fell into the trap and the
Speaker 1: trap was set. Now I'm so glad you reported it,
Speaker 1: but I want to I want to make sure you
Speaker 1: take the next step as well, and I want to
Speaker 1: make sure that the authorities are contacted for this, because
Speaker 1: this is there is a big trafficking scheme that goes
Speaker 1: along with this kind of sexploitation. There are many people
Speaker 1: right now, in fact, millions that are that are enslaved
Speaker 1: and trapped by sexploitation because of something just like this,
Speaker 1: because of a scheme that they sent a video to someone,
Speaker 1: a private video that they thought was a love interest
Speaker 1: about their age, ended up being some kind of scam
Speaker 1: that's part of some kind of crime ring that then
Speaker 1: brings that victim in and says now that I have this,
Speaker 1: Now that I have this information about you, or this
Speaker 1: video of you or this picture of you, I will
Speaker 1: show it to everyone. I will ruin your life. I
Speaker 1: will show all of your classmates, your friends, your parents,
Speaker 1: your teachers, everyone in the town will see this vulnerable
Speaker 1: video or picture of you. I have you trapped. The
Speaker 1: only way I will not do that is if you
Speaker 1: obey me and do exactly what I say. Now. I
Speaker 1: need you to send another picture doing this. If you
Speaker 1: do not send it within twenty four hours, I will
Speaker 1: release this blackmailed video. So that's how it works. That's
Speaker 1: very common, and most people that are trapped in that
Speaker 1: don't say a word for fear because they're scared. We
Speaker 1: need to be aware of this, We need to know
Speaker 1: that this is going on. And I would like you
Speaker 1: to know tofy the police about this. Anonymous. So all
Speaker 1: of that I didn't I didn't even really get into
Speaker 1: what you're asking. But you said you've prayed about it,
Speaker 1: you've asked for forgiveness, but you're still filled with shame,
Speaker 1: just wondering how you could that you can overcome this
Speaker 1: kind of shame. That's what you're asking, And I would say,
Speaker 1: shine a light in the dark place, shine a light
Speaker 1: on it, right on it. And the way you shine
Speaker 1: a light on it is bring truth to it. Bring truth,
Speaker 1: bring it to light. Confess this, not in a way
Speaker 1: that you have to confess more and more and more.
Speaker 1: That can become a pnception. And you don't want to
Speaker 1: be obsessed with confessing, right, That's that's different. That's not
Speaker 1: what this is about. This is about shining a light
Speaker 1: in that dark, in those dark corners where the cobwebs
Speaker 1: are in your life, and you go look over there.
Speaker 1: I want everyone to see this, mister police officer, my friends.
Speaker 1: I did this. I'm messed up, and I will not
Speaker 1: do this again. I've learned my lesson. But I also
Speaker 1: want to make a bring awareness to other people that
Speaker 1: could be in a similar kind of situation. There's no
Speaker 1: shame in that and hiding it and crawling into a
Speaker 1: ball and just wondering if you're a really bad person
Speaker 1: that's going to cultivate more shame. Thanks for emailing, By
Speaker 1: the way, I want to say that again. There's another
Speaker 1: fifteen year old and I'm gonna wait on that one
Speaker 1: so I don't do back to back. And here's a
Speaker 1: sixteen year old. I'm gonna wait on that so we
Speaker 1: don't go back to back. And here's another sixteen year
Speaker 1: old man. I just keep pulling up the teenagers. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's pull up this one. I don't know how old
Speaker 1: this person is, but it says red letters. That's the
Speaker 1: subject line. My name is Isaac Robbins from East Palestine, Ohio,
Speaker 1: and I have been a fan of yours for quite
Speaker 1: a while, but recently found your podcast and spent the
Speaker 1: better part part of the last four weeks binging listening
Speaker 1: to get caught up on all one hundred and ninety
Speaker 1: four episodes. That's amazing. But my question is this, when
Speaker 1: reading the Bible, in the New Testament, you find red
Speaker 1: letter words which are directly quoted as Jesus's words, but
Speaker 1: following the Trinity and the fact that all the Bible
Speaker 1: is God breathe to man, is it all God slash
Speaker 1: Jesus's words? Just wondering what your thoughts are on red letters. Oh,
Speaker 1: that's such a great question. I love that question, and
Speaker 1: I also love that you have binged listened to one
Speaker 1: hundred and ninety four episodes. That's really impressive and thank
Speaker 1: you so much for that. Yeah, I hear you, and
Speaker 1: I agree with you, and I personally, as I have
Speaker 1: grown personally in my faith, I have a problem with
Speaker 1: red letter Bibles. I say that very loosely, because of
Speaker 1: course I own some. I have some on my shelf
Speaker 1: in here, but I'm not a fan of them like
Speaker 1: I used to be as a baby believer. Because of
Speaker 1: what you're saying, there's a couple of reasons. One we
Speaker 1: don't always know. This is reason number one. We don't
Speaker 1: always know exactly when Jesus starts talking and when he
Speaker 1: finishes talking, and when the apostle carries on the conversation.
Speaker 1: For instance, John three point sixteen is actually a great
Speaker 1: example of this. We're not sure if Jesus himself said
Speaker 1: the words in John three point sixteen, for God so
Speaker 1: loved the world he gave his only son. We don't
Speaker 1: know if Jesus said that, or if that is John,
Speaker 1: the apostle who's writing the Book of John. If this
Speaker 1: is John commentating, you see what I mean. So we
Speaker 1: don't know when Jesus stops talking and when John starts commentating.
Speaker 1: This is important. Now, that doesn't matter. That doesn't matter
Speaker 1: in knowing truth, because John three point sixteen is still absolute, fundamental,
Speaker 1: objective truth. It doesn't matter if Jesus said it or
Speaker 1: if the apostle John said it, because it's like you
Speaker 1: said in your email, it's still God breathed. Right, But
Speaker 1: you could put an unnecessary emphasis on looking for red
Speaker 1: letter words and ignoring the black letter words. There's the problem.
Speaker 1: So the problem is not whether it's truth or not.
Speaker 1: The problem is feeling like only the red parts are
Speaker 1: the true parts, and the black parts aren't as important
Speaker 1: as the red parts, when all of it is important.
Speaker 1: Like you said, it's all God breathed. So I'm more
Speaker 1: of a fan now, as have become more maturer over
Speaker 1: the years, I'm more of a fan of all black
Speaker 1: letters because you said it great. I mean, Jesus himself said,
Speaker 1: the prophets were talking about me, Moses was talking about me.
Speaker 1: So you go back into Exodus and Genesis and Leviticus,
Speaker 1: and you don't see red letters there. Right when we're
Speaker 1: hearing from Moses, we're not seeing red letters. We're seeing
Speaker 1: black letters. And so don't put an unnecessary emphasis on
Speaker 1: where the red letters are for those two reasons. One,
Speaker 1: you don't exactly know what Jesus is saying or when
Speaker 1: this is the apostle John talking now, you know, but
Speaker 1: it's also important just to take scripture as a whole,
Speaker 1: as God breathed, as objective truth. It's a great observation,
Speaker 1: and I kind of get that problem. I'm going to
Speaker 1: move on from this question, but I want to say
Speaker 1: lastly that I have a problem because country music lyrics
Speaker 1: always say red letters because it's poetic. It's like, how
Speaker 1: many times, maybe not on the radio necessarily, but how
Speaker 1: many times if I heard a songwriter write a song
Speaker 1: or it's an album cut, or it's a song pitched,
Speaker 1: or it's just a songwriter with a demo, And it's
Speaker 1: poetic to say things when you're using colors like blue
Speaker 1: collar red letters, you know, and you could just endlessly
Speaker 1: make these kind of analogies, but it's really it's such
Speaker 1: a songwriting thing to be like, Man, I always trust
Speaker 1: them red letters. Mom always told me to look at
Speaker 1: them red letters and not believe them red dirt. I
Speaker 1: grew up on the red dirt and the red letters.
Speaker 1: You know. It's like, Okay, I get it, but there's
Speaker 1: a problem there because what about the black letters? You
Speaker 1: know what I mean. Okay, let's move on. That's my point,
Speaker 1: all right. Ceject line here says life changes. Hey, Granger.
Speaker 1: I started a new job back in twenty thirteen or
Speaker 1: two twenty twenty three in February. It was supposed to
Speaker 1: be the end all, be all job. A family member
Speaker 1: helps me get this job, and they also work there. Recently,
Speaker 1: this family member and I had a falling out and
Speaker 1: I've not spoken in a few days. Back to the
Speaker 1: job aspect, I am not happy here. Said family member
Speaker 1: has been the only reason I've stayed here, but it's
Speaker 1: taken a toll mentally on me as I'm not one
Speaker 1: hundred percent happy here. It's the best job I've ever had,
Speaker 1: but at the same time, I feel as though the
Speaker 1: work and I the work I do. Sorry, I'm having
Speaker 1: trouble reading. The work I do goes unnoticed in the
Speaker 1: majority of the time. I'm adding some words here. With
Speaker 1: this falling out, it has made me realize that I'm
Speaker 1: not happy where I'm at and would love to pick
Speaker 1: things up and move six plus hours away to an
Speaker 1: area I've wanted to live in for years now? Am
Speaker 1: I crazy after such an inconvenience to be thinking like this?
Speaker 1: Thank you and God bless Jake Jake, thanks for the email. Brother.
Speaker 1: Let me recap real quickly from my own brain. You
Speaker 1: started this job recently, just a few months ago, and
Speaker 1: it was supposed to be a great job, and it is.
Speaker 1: You ended up saying a family member helped you get
Speaker 1: the job, and then you guys got into an argument.
Speaker 1: You had a falling out. You haven't spoken a few
Speaker 1: days now. This is making the job super uncomfortable. You're
Speaker 1: not one hundred percent happy, and you're kind of wondering
Speaker 1: why you're not happy if this is like the perfect job.
Speaker 1: You're feeling restless. Right there's this place that you know,
Speaker 1: six and out, six plus hours away, and you kind
Speaker 1: of just want to escape because maybe, as they say,
Speaker 1: the grass is greener. That's my recap, and I'll tell
Speaker 1: you this. I know this for sure, Jake. I know,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know a lot of things
Speaker 1: for sure, but I do know this, that place that's
Speaker 1: six hours away, you will fall back into this same
Speaker 1: rut there too. No matter where you go, you're gonna
Speaker 1: have this feeling like, you know what, I thought this
Speaker 1: was better. I thought this was gonna be better than this,
Speaker 1: and I'm still not really happy. I'm not like you said,
Speaker 1: I'm not one hundred percent happy. It's something else that's
Speaker 1: going on. There's a searching that's going on that's beyond
Speaker 1: a job because partly, and I'm getting off of what
Speaker 1: I know is true. I know that that's true. But
Speaker 1: now I'm gonna get off of that and go into
Speaker 1: my opinions. Your job has become to you, and I
Speaker 1: di it's a form of identity. It defines you. It's
Speaker 1: who you are. You are the job. And when you
Speaker 1: go in and the job isn't perfect, it has flaws,
Speaker 1: of course it does. And then you got this family
Speaker 1: member that brought you in and now you guys are
Speaker 1: having arguments. Of course that happens. Then your identity starts
Speaker 1: to become eroded. There's problems in it. There's there's flaws
Speaker 1: in your own identity now because there's flaws in the
Speaker 1: job and the flaws and the family member, and you
Speaker 1: start thinking, well, I'm not happy, and if I'm not happy,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna blame it on my situation. We blame our
Speaker 1: happiness on these different things were when we're looking for
Speaker 1: our identity through what we do, then we blame it
Speaker 1: on certain circumstances. For instance, we can blame it on
Speaker 1: the people that are around us family. We could say
Speaker 1: I'm not happy because my wife drives me crazy. My
Speaker 1: kid he's wacko. My boss is a lunatic, he doesn't
Speaker 1: appreciate you. Even said that my work gets unnoticed majority
Speaker 1: of the time. I blame my boss, I blame my superiors. Right.
Speaker 1: So to solve that problem, that problem of identity, you
Speaker 1: drop them, divorce, ignore the kid, move out from the family,
Speaker 1: get a new job. But because that never was your
Speaker 1: identity to begin with, it was a false blame, a false,
Speaker 1: false accusation, and you don't have a solution. Another way
Speaker 1: to look at this is it's the system. The system
Speaker 1: is messing things up for me. If it wasn't for
Speaker 1: the system or the government people say, the government, if
Speaker 1: it wasn't for the Democrats and the office right now,
Speaker 1: if it wasn't for the Trump followers, the Republicans, if
Speaker 1: it wasn't for what you name it, fill in the blank,
Speaker 1: whatever it is, the system, the government, the union, the
Speaker 1: big corporation. It's you are in a system that is
Speaker 1: flawed and that is making you unhappy, that is affecting
Speaker 1: your identity. Okay, and then another option is this one.
Speaker 1: This is unfortunate, but it happens a lot as well.
Speaker 1: You might think the problem is me. I just screw
Speaker 1: up everything everywhere I go. It's not my wife, it's
Speaker 1: not my boss, it's not the system, it's not the government.
Speaker 1: It's me. I'm just a screw up. I mess everything up.
Speaker 1: So that's another way. Those are all three false ways
Speaker 1: of finding your identity and false ways of accusing those
Speaker 1: around you or yourself with your own happiness. But I
Speaker 1: promise you, brother, if you don't find your own identity
Speaker 1: and the one that created you for his purpose, if
Speaker 1: you can't see that, you'll always keep searching for a
Speaker 1: truth that's not out there. You'll always be restless, You'll
Speaker 1: always feel like there's something else. The grass is always greener,
Speaker 1: and it's not until you realize I was created for
Speaker 1: the purpose greater than anything I can imagine. We'll take
Speaker 1: a break view right back. Some people have been asking
Speaker 1: me since I'm stepping away from music touring, what will
Speaker 1: happen to ee? Well, nothing that stays the same. Of course,
Speaker 1: my brothers and I run that company, and specifically my
Speaker 1: little brother Parker is the CEO of that company. So
Speaker 1: touring has really nothing to do with him at all,
Speaker 1: so that is doing fine. We're still in fact, we're
Speaker 1: doing an old school launch coming up on July twenty first,
Speaker 1: and I love that stuff. We went out and show
Speaker 1: some old school merch. We're gonna sell that on yee
Speaker 1: dot com as always again that launch, that special launch
Speaker 1: that will not be available after that stuff sells out,
Speaker 1: which I know it will at ee y dot com.
Speaker 1: If you need to get a hold of me for
Speaker 1: some reason, Cameo dot com slash Granger Smith. I talk
Speaker 1: about that almost every week here on the podcast. You
Speaker 1: could make a request for me to make you a
Speaker 1: little video message to anybody you want, including yourself, for
Speaker 1: any kind of anniversary or birthday or pick me up
Speaker 1: or holiday, whatever it might be. I could make you
Speaker 1: a video message on my phone and say whatever you
Speaker 1: need me to say at cameo dot com slash Granger Smith.
Speaker 1: Also on the Cameo app search for Granger Smith me.
Speaker 1: And then I can't get away with not saying anything
Speaker 1: about Like a River coming out just in a few
Speaker 1: weeks as I record this podcast, August the first, Like
Speaker 1: a River, my first book comes out. This is my story,
Speaker 1: my wife and I story as we navigated green loss
Speaker 1: after losing my son River he was three years old,
Speaker 1: And the book is going to start with that, and
Speaker 1: then it's going to walk through the aftermath, what we
Speaker 1: dealt with, what we went through, and ultimately how we
Speaker 1: found purpose in our pain. The book's called Like a River.
Speaker 1: You could pre order right now at grangersmith dot com.
Speaker 1: After it comes out August first, you'll be able to
Speaker 1: get it wherever you love to find books. Let's get
Speaker 1: back to your questions on the podcast. Okay, welcome back
Speaker 1: to the podcast. Thanks so much for being here with me.
Speaker 1: If you have a question, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail
Speaker 1: dot com. Very excited to say that we got just
Speaker 1: from when I sit here and record this just a
Speaker 1: couple more weeks till Like a River comes out, So
Speaker 1: I can't wait to see questions come in to Grangersmith
Speaker 1: Podcast about that book. That would be really neat. I
Speaker 1: would love that. Moving forward here the next question I
Speaker 1: have on Q subject CLIENTE said please read, and the
Speaker 1: question says, Hey, Granger, thank you for everything you do.
Speaker 1: You've helped me in plenty of areas in my life.
Speaker 1: My name is Spencer. I'm fifteen years old almost sixteen.
Speaker 1: I have liked this girl for a really long time.
Speaker 1: She's an amazing girl and she's very godly. However, when
Speaker 1: talking to her and asking her what kind of family
Speaker 1: she wants in the future, she says, like one or
Speaker 1: two kids and a small house in the city, but
Speaker 1: I want four to six kids, two dogs, and a
Speaker 1: big property in the country. And when I told her that,
Speaker 1: she was like, wow, that's a huge family. I could
Speaker 1: never do that. And when looking for a person, I
Speaker 1: don't care what hobbies they like or how their tastes
Speaker 1: line up with mine, but I think the kind of
Speaker 1: family they want to raise and how that lines up
Speaker 1: is very vital. I've told myself that she's not the
Speaker 1: one for me, but I can't get rid of this
Speaker 1: undying feeling for her no matter what I tell myself.
Speaker 1: So my question is this, should I ignore my logical
Speaker 1: side and just blindly like her or try to kill
Speaker 1: my feelings for her? Sorry for the email, yege uh
Speaker 1: and this is yeah from Spencer. Thanks to Spencer. Appreciate
Speaker 1: your brother. Man, You're too young to be thinking about this.
Speaker 1: I'm just going to straight up this is this is
Speaker 1: tough love. Stop stop worrying. These are natural things. I
Speaker 1: should say it that way. It's it's natural for you
Speaker 1: to be thinking down the road about what you want,
Speaker 1: right man, I think it would be nice to have
Speaker 1: four to six kids, two dogs, and a big property
Speaker 1: in the country. Okay, it's it's good. It's good to dream.
Speaker 1: It's good to have that kind of feeling, and you
Speaker 1: can kind of start crafting your life around that dream.
Speaker 1: That's good. It could change, know that, it definitely could change,
Speaker 1: but it's good to nonetheless have this kind of dream.
Speaker 1: Where it gets dangerous and bad, in my opinion, is
Speaker 1: when you start needing that from a girlfriend who's fifteen,
Speaker 1: and you're like, hey, I want you to I want
Speaker 1: you to just know, oh that my life is going
Speaker 1: to consist of four to six kids, two dogs, and
Speaker 1: a big house in the country. That's when it gets
Speaker 1: weird because you don't expect a girl that's fifteen to
Speaker 1: have that kind of vision. Her clock hasn't started, her
Speaker 1: biological clock hasn't started even ticking yet. It's cool that
Speaker 1: you're planning, but she has other dreams and you can't
Speaker 1: make a fifteen year old girl think like you do
Speaker 1: because you're planning for the future. And because she doesn't
Speaker 1: and because she says, yeah, I guess I could have
Speaker 1: one or two kids. Just because she says that doesn't
Speaker 1: mean that that's not going to change, and that she's
Speaker 1: not when her clock kicks in about twenty five years
Speaker 1: old and she's ready to make babies, it could be
Speaker 1: totally different. So you're basing whether or not you should
Speaker 1: even talk to this girl and worry and you're stressing
Speaker 1: about it, and you're emailing me on something that really
Speaker 1: does not matter at all. It doesn't matter. Let it go.
Speaker 1: Change the subject here. I got a new one for you.
Speaker 1: What kind of milkshake do you like? Chocolate or vanilla?
Speaker 1: Where do you want to What movie do you want
Speaker 1: to see on Friday night? At best, that's the conversation
Speaker 1: you could have, and do it with friends around you,
Speaker 1: because it's also it's also pretty young to be going
Speaker 1: on private dates anyway. So bring a bunch of friends.
Speaker 1: You guys, go see the high school football game together.
Speaker 1: If you're not playing and she's not cheering, and you're
Speaker 1: just in the stands, whatever, join the community. They have
Speaker 1: a bunch of friends around, and go get you a milkshake.
Speaker 1: But don't be worried about where you're going to live
Speaker 1: and how many kids you're gonna make with the girl.
Speaker 1: That's fifteen, Okay, that's way down the road. That's ten years.
Speaker 1: That's a decade down the road. Okay, I'm gonna end
Speaker 1: with that. All right. Here's this is a interesting subject
Speaker 1: line says Lord's name in vain. Hello, Granger, I'd like
Speaker 1: to stay anonymous. I have two questions. I'm gonna try
Speaker 1: to keep them phone length and get right to the point.
Speaker 1: Number one, I know it's wrong to use the Lord's
Speaker 1: name in vain and a cringe whenever someone uses it,
Speaker 1: especially when it's somebody close to me. My question is
Speaker 1: how do you tell them or somebody it's wrong? Number two,
Speaker 1: how do I help my best friend stop sabotaging self sabotaging?
Speaker 1: And number three? Was there a third question? There is
Speaker 1: a third question? How do you stay faithful to God
Speaker 1: when it feels like He isn't responding to any of
Speaker 1: your prayers and you can't fill his presence in your life?
Speaker 1: Thanks for your music in your podcast. They helped me
Speaker 1: get through that Monday work. Can't wait to see her
Speaker 1: Like a river tour in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania. All right, Anonymous,
Speaker 1: I'll keep it there. Thank you so much for emailing.
Speaker 1: I appreciate you so much. And let's kind of walk
Speaker 1: through these questions. Number one, lord's name in vain. I'm
Speaker 1: here's the deal. Let me let me take a different
Speaker 1: route with this. Number one. You said you know it's
Speaker 1: wrong to use the Lord's name in vain, and you
Speaker 1: cringe whenever somebody uses it, especially someone close to you.
Speaker 1: That's that's your words, right, it's number one, that's your question.
Speaker 1: Let me repeat that question. I know it's wrong to
Speaker 1: use the Lord's name in vain, and I cringe whenever
Speaker 1: someone else uses it. I'm gonna switch to question three.
Speaker 1: How do you stay faithful to God when it feels
Speaker 1: like He isn't responding to any of your prayers and
Speaker 1: you can't feel his presence in your life? You see
Speaker 1: what you did there. You trust, You trust God, You
Speaker 1: believe in God. You trust God when someone uses his
Speaker 1: name in vain or around you, But you don't trust
Speaker 1: God really and every other circumstance because you don't feel
Speaker 1: like he's there responding, You don't feel like he's listening.
Speaker 1: You can't fill his presence in your life. It's interesting, right.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying I'm not blaming you, I'm not criticizing
Speaker 1: you or judging you anyway. Just I'm kind of holding
Speaker 1: these two sides up here, and i just want you
Speaker 1: to look at what is in each of my hands.
Speaker 1: Your question one in three, it's interesting to hold them
Speaker 1: side by side, in case you haven't done that. It's interesting, right,
Speaker 1: it's very interesting. I've said this before, and I know
Speaker 1: it was recently, and I might as well. I might
Speaker 1: as well say it again because I think it matters.
Speaker 1: But I'm going to pull up on my phone here,
Speaker 1: pull up Psalm thirteen. So for your question three, I
Speaker 1: would meditate on Psalm thirteen. I think it's great for
Speaker 1: this kind of stuff. I think it's lost in today's culture.
Speaker 1: The laments are lost in today's culture. And this is
Speaker 1: David the Psalmist writing these words. Okay, keep in mind
Speaker 1: David was a man after God's own heart. Psal I'm thirteen.
Speaker 1: How long, O Lord, will you forget me forever? How
Speaker 1: long will you hide your face from me? How long
Speaker 1: must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow
Speaker 1: in my heart all the day? How long shall my
Speaker 1: enemy be exalted over me. Consider and answer me, O,
Speaker 1: Lord my God, lift up my eyes, lest I sleep
Speaker 1: the sleep of death. Lest my enemies say I have
Speaker 1: prevailed over him. Lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.
Speaker 1: But that is a powerful butt, y'all. In verse five.
Speaker 1: But I have trusted in your steadfast love. My heart
Speaker 1: shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord,
Speaker 1: because he has dealt bountifully with me. I will sing.
Speaker 1: So you sing. That's David's example here. What do you do?
Speaker 1: What do you do when you feel like he's not listening,
Speaker 1: you can't feel his presence? You sing? It's interesting, right,
Speaker 1: that's what David said. I would go back and back
Speaker 1: to that Psalm thirteen. I've gone back to it just
Speaker 1: two podcasts in a row. And I think it's important
Speaker 1: for people to know what the psalmist feels. Right, he
Speaker 1: feels like he's abandoned, and then when he feels that way,
Speaker 1: he goes back to what he knows, and the way
Speaker 1: he deals with what he knows is by singing praises.
Speaker 1: It's interesting how that works. Right. God has set up
Speaker 1: his system for us. We don't know why, but it's
Speaker 1: it's highly entwined in faith. It's always there's always room
Speaker 1: in our lives for faith. He's never gonna he's never
Speaker 1: gonna fill up his presence so much that there's no
Speaker 1: room left for faith, no room left for us to say,
Speaker 1: I don't see you, I don't hear you, and I
Speaker 1: don't feel you, but I know you God, and I
Speaker 1: believe you, and I trust you and I love you.
Speaker 1: That's faith. Now, there are times when he's so present
Speaker 1: and so real and in our lives and speaking to
Speaker 1: us so clearly, and it's great that we have those moments,
Speaker 1: and then it goes. Then we go into other moments,
Speaker 1: other seasons of our life when we just don't feel it.
Speaker 1: Those are those are the times when it's faith that
Speaker 1: fills the gap. Right. This is why I was reading
Speaker 1: the Bible so important, because we go, oh, it's not
Speaker 1: just me, I see it right here, and so I'm thirteen.
Speaker 1: It wasn't just me. I thought it was just me,
Speaker 1: But it's David, a man after God's own heart. Wow.
Speaker 1: So back to question one. I need you to work
Speaker 1: this out, and I need you to work out question three.
Speaker 1: And that's gonna help a lot with question one because
Speaker 1: question one when you when you hear someone speak the
Speaker 1: Lord's name in vain and they're they're not a believer,
Speaker 1: they don't trust the Lord, they don't love the Lord.
Speaker 1: Are you surprised? Is that surprising to you? And so
Speaker 1: at that point it's almost weird to say, oh, don't
Speaker 1: do that, because it begins to sound legalistic, it begins
Speaker 1: to sound like you're judging. Don't say that. Don't say that.
Speaker 1: You can kind of WinCE and they go, what you go?
Speaker 1: Just what you said. It just kind of makes me wins.
Speaker 1: I would do it more like that and less like,
Speaker 1: don't say that, don't use the Lord's name in vain,
Speaker 1: because the truth is people do a lot of things
Speaker 1: when they don't know Jesus, and it shouldn't surprise us. Instead,
Speaker 1: we should model Jesus as a mirror that of his
Speaker 1: light back to them and live that out for them
Speaker 1: and preach that out to them in a way that
Speaker 1: shows forgiveness and love. Right. Yeah, Question two, how do
Speaker 1: I help my best friend stop self sabotaging? Rewind and
Speaker 1: listen to what I just said about all of that?
Speaker 1: There you go, there you go. Let's hit another one here. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's see some crazy subject lines here. It's so hard
Speaker 1: when I only have a few questions to randomly pick
Speaker 1: what I think is going to be the right one.
Speaker 1: But here we go. Subject line veteran. I'd like to
Speaker 1: remain anonymous. I love listening to your podcast, love your music,
Speaker 1: and respect your decision to leave the music industry for
Speaker 1: a higher calling. Raised Catholic, and after my first deployment
Speaker 1: to Afghanistan, I stopped believing question how do I trust
Speaker 1: in people again? I've closed my circle and shut people out.
Speaker 1: I believed time would heal all things, but it doesn't
Speaker 1: seem to get better. I read my late Grandpa's Bible
Speaker 1: frequently on Saturday and Sunday mornings when my family is
Speaker 1: still asleep, but I can't seem to find the answers interesting. Anonymous,
Speaker 1: thanks for the question, Thanks for your service. Can't imagine
Speaker 1: what you saw in Afghanistan. Can't imagine, so thank you
Speaker 1: for your service. Let me kind of dissect your question,
Speaker 1: how do I trust in people again? Talking about it
Speaker 1: after deployment, I've closed my circle and shut people out.
Speaker 1: I believed time would heal all things, but it doesn't.
Speaker 1: It doesn't. I read my Bible, your great grandpa's you're late.
Speaker 1: Excuse me. Grandpa's Bible frequently on Saturday and Sunday mornings
Speaker 1: when your family is still asleep. Okay, all right, A
Speaker 1: couple of things here. I just want to encourage you. First,
Speaker 1: I love the search. I love searchers. I'm a searcher myself,
Speaker 1: and I love to hear from searchers. And I love
Speaker 1: searcher questions. Because what I mean is this. You could
Speaker 1: have said this. You could have said this, hey man.
Speaker 1: After my first deployment to Afghanistan, I stopped believing in
Speaker 1: God and I don't trust people anymore. And I thought
Speaker 1: time would heal all things, but it doesn't, and some
Speaker 1: I'm stuck and I don't know what to do. You
Speaker 1: could have said it that way, right, But that's not
Speaker 1: what you said. You said you said, I'm looking, I'm
Speaker 1: reading frequently, I'm searching, and then you said, but I
Speaker 1: still can't seem to find I can't find. That's insinuating
Speaker 1: that you're searching but you can't find m I like that.
Speaker 1: That sets you up for success right away. For me.
Speaker 1: If I'm if I'm speaking to you, if I'm speaking
Speaker 1: to you about truth, I'm like, all right, Okay, good, good.
Speaker 1: I love that this guy's searching because it's you haven't
Speaker 1: closed the door. You got the windows open and the
Speaker 1: door open, and you're like, I don't know what to do.
Speaker 1: I'm trying different things and I can't find it. Okay,
Speaker 1: but you're going down the right path. What I always
Speaker 1: recommend on this podcast is community because we were just
Speaker 1: never made to process things alone. Humans are not made
Speaker 1: to process anything alone. So I recommend community wise counsel. Friends.
Speaker 1: Be careful who you choose for this. This is important.
Speaker 1: That's why I say going to a local church is
Speaker 1: a good place. It's a good place to start. It's
Speaker 1: a good community, it's a good small group. You can
Speaker 1: be the guy who walks into church, who shows up
Speaker 1: on a Sunday. You can be the guy that says,
Speaker 1: I'm coming here, and mister pastor, I just want to
Speaker 1: let you know I don't believe. I don't believe in
Speaker 1: your Bible stuff. My grandpa did, but I don't. But
Speaker 1: I'm coming here because I'm searching. I'm here trying to
Speaker 1: figure out what this is all about. Here trying to
Speaker 1: figure out what my grandpa saw and this whole thing,
Speaker 1: this whole Christian thing, this whole. Christ came from heaven
Speaker 1: and entered humanity and died on a cross to cover
Speaker 1: my sins because I couldn't do it. In mankind, no
Speaker 1: one could do it, no one could live up to
Speaker 1: the standard of God. Even though so many people and
Speaker 1: so many other religions, including the Catholic Church, say that
Speaker 1: you got to work to be good. You gotta like
Speaker 1: Santa Claus's checklists, you gotta work to be a certain
Speaker 1: level so that maybe at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: if you helped enough old ladies across the street, you're
Speaker 1: worthy of heaven. And the Christian God says no, Jesus says,
Speaker 1: I am enough. It is finished. I have paid the price.
Speaker 1: I came down in a substitution for your worthlessness. I
Speaker 1: then made you worthy because I was worthy. And I
Speaker 1: died as a sacrifice to take the place of all
Speaker 1: the sacrifices that you couldn't have done. And all I
Speaker 1: ask in return is you trust in me, trust me,
Speaker 1: believe me. I got you covered. And you're going You
Speaker 1: are sitting there, anonymous, and You're like, I just want
Speaker 1: to know what this is all about, and I'm skeptical
Speaker 1: about it. It's a good place to be Did you
Speaker 1: know that it's a good place to be skeptical about
Speaker 1: it on Sunday mornings in church. It's a lot better
Speaker 1: than not going, and it's a lot better than not
Speaker 1: than having a closed mind about it. It's like, hey,
Speaker 1: tell me more about this stuff. I'm interested. I'm looking
Speaker 1: for something. Let me warn you. Let me warn you
Speaker 1: you listening. I hope you're listening. The Bible says seek
Speaker 1: and you will find knock and the door will be opened.
Speaker 1: I'm warning you when you keep seeking like this, you
Speaker 1: keep searching for answers like this, and you're going down
Speaker 1: this path, the path of the Bible, you might just
Speaker 1: find what you're looking for. Let's grab one more. We'll
Speaker 1: go back to one of those teenagers teenage ones. Subject
Speaker 1: line is my heart too attached? Hey Granger. My name
Speaker 1: is Eli, I'm sixteen. I'm from Cheyenne, Wyoming. I'm a
Speaker 1: huge fan of your music and podcast. My favorite song
Speaker 1: without a doubt is Remington. Thank you, buddy. There's a
Speaker 1: girl I really like and she likes me too. She
Speaker 1: cheated on me, and I chose to forgive her. My
Speaker 1: mama and friends keep telling me I made the wrong choice,
Speaker 1: and I need to break up with her. I'm torn
Speaker 1: between breaking up or staying together to work it out.
Speaker 1: I've been praying, and I'm just lost. I also feel
Speaker 1: like I made too much. I've made girls too much
Speaker 1: of a priority in my life, so that is playing
Speaker 1: a big role in my confusion. Any advice, thanks in Yigi. Yes,
Speaker 1: I have advice, Eli. Thanks, thank for email and brother.
Speaker 1: Here's my advice. When you're sixteen and older than that.
Speaker 1: There's something to say about trusting mama. There's something to
Speaker 1: say about trusting your friends. And when both of them
Speaker 1: are saying the same thing, your mama and your friends,
Speaker 1: you should listen to them. The girl's not right for you.
Speaker 1: I know she's not right for you, not because of
Speaker 1: anything you said about her cheating and you forgiving. I
Speaker 1: know she's not right for you because your mama and
Speaker 1: your friends told you so. You just don't want to
Speaker 1: listen to them, but you need to, because when mama
Speaker 1: and friends say something about a girl that you're dating,
Speaker 1: do it. They see the outside perspective, They're looking at
Speaker 1: the whole picture. You can't. You're blinded. You got blinders
Speaker 1: on and you can't see what's going on like they
Speaker 1: can't from the outside. Listen to them. Take counsel in, Mama,
Speaker 1: take counsel in your friends, move on from this girl'll
Speaker 1: break up with her. Thanks for emailing, buddy. We'll see
Speaker 1: all you guys next Monday. Thanks for joining me on
Speaker 1: the Granger Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys.
Speaker 1: You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes.
Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that
Speaker 1: little like button and the notification spell so that you
Speaker 1: never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have
Speaker 1: a question for me that you would like me to answer,
Speaker 1: email Graingersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Yi