WEBVTT - Adult Sleep Overs 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:03.520 Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife. 0:00:03.680 --> 0:00:06.600 She couldn't She cleaned, cared for her children and the 0:00:06.640 --> 0:00:09.640 man of the house, and of course she didn't talk back. 0:00:09.800 --> 0:00:12.640 She was both obedient and soft by nature. She was 0:00:12.680 --> 0:00:15.600 a good woman who always made good choices. 0:00:16.640 --> 0:00:19.800 That we're good Mom's bad choices. Who's single mom who 0:00:19.800 --> 0:00:22.400 said fuck the patriarchy, shared all their bad choices and 0:00:22.440 --> 0:00:24.599 sound out they were so bad. After all, we're expert 0:00:24.680 --> 0:00:26.600 overshares and your new besties. 0:00:26.720 --> 0:00:28.040 Sit back and enjoy the ride. 0:00:28.800 --> 0:00:29.360 I can do it. 0:00:29.440 --> 0:00:29.480 That. 0:00:33.080 --> 0:00:34.839 Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. 0:00:34.920 --> 0:00:40.080 I'm Erica and I'm Mela, and it's Wednesday. It is 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:45.479 welcome back to the Good Mom Show. How are you feeling? 0:00:46.960 --> 0:00:47.400 I'm good. 0:00:47.440 --> 0:00:50.680 We're doing this episode from home today, which is very rare. 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:56.640 We decided to honor our energy and keep it in 0:00:56.720 --> 0:00:59.360 the crib, so I feel good. I put makeup on, 0:00:59.480 --> 0:01:02.960 and shit, I got lipliner overdrawn on my lips and 0:01:03.000 --> 0:01:06.000 stuff like I'm going somewhere. But if you saw what 0:01:06.040 --> 0:01:08.680 I was wearing under below this shirt, I'm still in 0:01:08.760 --> 0:01:12.480 my pajamas, not below the shirt. But I do have 0:01:12.520 --> 0:01:14.960 my I do have our merch on which I do too. 0:01:15.600 --> 0:01:17.280 Oh look, see if we' even mean to do this. 0:01:17.680 --> 0:01:20.600 I think that one's sold out, but this one is not. 0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:25.720 I wear our merch a lot, and you should too. 0:01:25.760 --> 0:01:27.759 You should check out our merchant goot Mom's Bad Choices 0:01:27.800 --> 0:01:29.280 dot com. We make a lot of cute shit, a 0:01:29.319 --> 0:01:32.200 lot of can of mom shit, a lot of bold statements, 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:34.720 a lot of things that you want to say, but 0:01:34.800 --> 0:01:40.080 sometimes you don't say it. This one says goddess spiritual sorority, 0:01:40.120 --> 0:01:42.320 because where a god is spiritual sorority? 0:01:44.319 --> 0:01:46.440 Black as fuck, mom as fuck, fine as fuck? 0:01:47.080 --> 0:01:49.280 Yep, do you wear that one? 0:01:49.760 --> 0:01:49.840 Me? 0:01:52.120 --> 0:01:53.640 Do you wear that one? When you pick up Iri 0:01:53.760 --> 0:01:54.240 from school? 0:01:55.040 --> 0:01:56.720 I wear all of our I think I talked to 0:01:56.720 --> 0:01:58.840 you about this on the few episodes ago. I don't 0:01:59.080 --> 0:02:04.080 not wear our merch. I don't spare my child's feelings 0:02:05.560 --> 0:02:07.840 when it comes to my merch because I created this. 0:02:07.840 --> 0:02:09.680 This is my shit, and I want and I know 0:02:09.720 --> 0:02:11.919 when other moms, and it happens every time I wear 0:02:11.919 --> 0:02:13.200 it and I go to the school, they're like, oh 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:16.760 my God, where suld I'm like, I need it. So 0:02:17.000 --> 0:02:22.200 I think that we should normalize wearing statement pieces. 0:02:20.760 --> 0:02:22.920 Just schools to school pick up. 0:02:23.000 --> 0:02:26.320 These parents know who we are and don't add me 0:02:26.360 --> 0:02:29.040 to the group text bitch. Maybe I'll prevent her about 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:30.519 unless you're with the shits. 0:02:30.919 --> 0:02:34.520 Maybe I'll present them from asking for sleepovers and play dates. 0:02:35.000 --> 0:02:37.600 That's fine, I hate and Lona's like, can you get 0:02:37.639 --> 0:02:39.799 some and seose mom's numbers if you have a play date? 0:02:39.840 --> 0:02:44.040 And no, at this point, I know I don't. I 0:02:44.040 --> 0:02:46.800 don't do that anymore, and say, if you want me 0:02:46.880 --> 0:02:49.200 to have the you get her mom's number. I'm not 0:02:49.240 --> 0:02:51.960 going to go search the databases of the onlines of 0:02:52.000 --> 0:02:55.200 the log into the school portal that I can't remember 0:02:55.560 --> 0:02:58.079 to try and find this bitch's phone number and also 0:02:58.680 --> 0:03:03.480 text her randomly like hey, this is ives. 0:03:03.400 --> 0:03:04.720 I've done that, and I will. 0:03:04.960 --> 0:03:07.160 But also like, I think our kids are old enough 0:03:07.160 --> 0:03:08.800 to be like, hey, what's your phone number? 0:03:09.400 --> 0:03:11.120 Write it on a piece of paper and get yeah, 0:03:11.400 --> 0:03:13.960 literal will bring home the paper. I'm like, Okay, I'll 0:03:13.960 --> 0:03:17.480 do what I gotta do. Yeah. 0:03:17.560 --> 0:03:19.960 But honestly, this summer, like Iri hasn't really been like 0:03:20.120 --> 0:03:23.760 hanging out so much with her friends from school. This 0:03:23.800 --> 0:03:25.840 is the first summer that I haven't put her in 0:03:26.240 --> 0:03:29.200 camp at her school, and it was by design because 0:03:29.200 --> 0:03:31.480 I really wanted her to like branch out and like 0:03:31.560 --> 0:03:34.680 have other experiences, go to the sleep away camp that 0:03:34.720 --> 0:03:37.240 we had sent our kids to, and also like I 0:03:37.280 --> 0:03:39.400 wanted to have more flexibility, And I think that she's 0:03:39.440 --> 0:03:42.360 actually enjoyed it more like she's still fucking sleeping right now. 0:03:42.400 --> 0:03:44.160 First of all, if she was in camp, she would 0:03:44.200 --> 0:03:47.800 be on her tenth activity, which is great too, But 0:03:47.840 --> 0:03:50.240 I just feel like I just needed this summer to 0:03:50.400 --> 0:03:53.280 like not feel like I had to adhere to a 0:03:53.320 --> 0:03:56.920 strict pickup, drop off schedule, even though those hours away 0:03:57.920 --> 0:04:00.320 do help, but I think it's also helped me slow 0:04:00.400 --> 0:04:03.320 down to like in parenting and like having to like 0:04:03.640 --> 0:04:05.839 figure things out with her, be more present with her, 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:09.839 and like I'm really focused on just like deepening our relationship, 0:04:09.880 --> 0:04:12.520 and I felt like summer camp was actually like hindering 0:04:12.560 --> 0:04:15.600 that because she was gone most of the day. It 0:04:15.600 --> 0:04:17.120 was like she was in school, and so like she 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:21.200 spends all year away from me in school, so me 0:04:21.360 --> 0:04:23.120 not putting her in camp this summer, I feel like 0:04:23.120 --> 0:04:25.920 it has been a really good thing for our relationship. 0:04:25.960 --> 0:04:29.400 I've seen how our relationship has like deepened and there's 0:04:29.440 --> 0:04:32.719 more trust and she's sharing more, and I think a 0:04:32.760 --> 0:04:35.520 lot of the worry that I had is starting to 0:04:35.560 --> 0:04:37.280 dissipate because I felt like, oh my god, she. 0:04:37.200 --> 0:04:38.840 Doesn't talk to me. What am I doing? 0:04:38.960 --> 0:04:40.919 Like I felt like I'm doing everything my mom didn't 0:04:40.960 --> 0:04:43.159 do on purpose because I didn't want to talk to 0:04:43.200 --> 0:04:45.760 her about shit. And here I am, like, you can 0:04:45.800 --> 0:04:48.359 tell me anything, nothing will get you in trouble, and 0:04:48.400 --> 0:04:52.400 she's like not saying shit. So I think it was 0:04:52.440 --> 0:04:54.440 just like a matter of just spending more time together. 0:04:54.640 --> 0:04:59.800 So I actually advocate for not sending your kid to 0:04:59.839 --> 0:05:02.480 some camp all fucking summer. I know parents are like. 0:05:02.440 --> 0:05:03.640 But I need the break. 0:05:04.560 --> 0:05:06.479 I mean, and you have if you have multiple kids, 0:05:06.560 --> 0:05:09.400 like I get it, Like I only got one, and 0:05:09.440 --> 0:05:12.080 she's like self sufficient and mature. 0:05:12.320 --> 0:05:18.479 I'm lucky, So yeah, I the summer break is for 0:05:18.600 --> 0:05:20.719 me too, Like I'm not waking up at eight am 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:22.800 to take you to camp. In fact, when she did 0:05:22.839 --> 0:05:26.159 do school camp with Irate, it was actually in my 0:05:26.400 --> 0:05:30.240 benefit because her grandmother lives closer to the school, so 0:05:30.640 --> 0:05:32.480 in a lot of times we'd be not here, so 0:05:32.560 --> 0:05:35.520 I that was my like, here, she's going to camp 0:05:35.560 --> 0:05:39.719 from your house. But yeah, I don't know if this 0:05:39.800 --> 0:05:43.280 is acceptable to say, but I fucking despise waking up 0:05:43.279 --> 0:05:45.520 in the morning and making lunch and picking up like 0:05:45.680 --> 0:05:48.159 pick up school drop off, some pickups. I would really 0:05:48.200 --> 0:05:49.720 like Luna. I would really like me to get my 0:05:49.720 --> 0:05:52.160 shit together so she'd be homeschooled, so I could get 0:05:52.240 --> 0:05:54.520 rich and have a twenty four hour tutor or whatever 0:05:54.640 --> 0:05:58.400 eight hour day tutor. Because as a child I hated 0:05:58.440 --> 0:06:00.280 waking up in the morning to go to school all 0:06:00.760 --> 0:06:04.960 all all the way to high school. So when I 0:06:05.000 --> 0:06:06.360 turned around and had a kid and I had to 0:06:06.400 --> 0:06:08.120 start fucking taking her, I was like, I didn't even 0:06:08.160 --> 0:06:11.359 get a good break. Twenty years is not enough. I 0:06:11.360 --> 0:06:13.279 mean how many years did I get, Like eighteen? I 0:06:13.279 --> 0:06:16.240 mean yeah, it just wasn't enough. And so I'm just like, 0:06:16.320 --> 0:06:19.320 I like not having a schedule, and I like along 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:21.960 with the flow. I mean, I'm maybe irin. Me and 0:06:22.200 --> 0:06:26.159 Luna and Orlando just came back from a camping trip, 0:06:26.440 --> 0:06:28.480 which I really felt was like an extension of their 0:06:28.520 --> 0:06:30.560 overnight camp. She was like, this is basically what we 0:06:30.600 --> 0:06:33.560 did at camp. I was like, perfect, it's family camp 0:06:34.160 --> 0:06:37.200 and it was really really fun and really nice. She 0:06:37.279 --> 0:06:39.560 had had a bucket list for the camp like for summer, 0:06:39.640 --> 0:06:41.200 and one of the things was like, I want to 0:06:41.200 --> 0:06:44.280 going camping, and I really wanted to go camping too 0:06:44.360 --> 0:06:46.480 since that last time Adventure Bay took us one hundred 0:06:46.560 --> 0:06:49.480 years ago. But I have no equipment. So finally, my friend, 0:06:49.839 --> 0:06:52.599 my best friend, who I've known for like fifteen years, 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:55.000 she moved up north and she was like, I'm gonna 0:06:55.000 --> 0:06:57.080 come down and busit you guys. And then she was 0:06:57.080 --> 0:06:58.839 like I'm gonna go back on Tuesday, and I was 0:06:58.920 --> 0:07:02.120 like why and because we're going camping And I was like, well, 0:07:02.160 --> 0:07:04.120 can we go? And She's like sure, we could drive 0:07:04.160 --> 0:07:07.520 back up together. So we did meet her her sister Luna. 0:07:07.600 --> 0:07:09.960 We all drove back up together and we had the 0:07:10.000 --> 0:07:12.600 best time. We're just like playing games in the car, 0:07:12.920 --> 0:07:16.080 doing tiktoks, just being silly and it was really fun 0:07:16.120 --> 0:07:19.640 and like packed the whole car up with fucking tents 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:24.320 and sleeping bags and food. Orlando of course seasoned Jamaican 0:07:24.720 --> 0:07:27.400 chicken to travel eight hours off the coast so we 0:07:27.400 --> 0:07:30.800 could go camping. And like you take a boat, you 0:07:30.880 --> 0:07:32.800 take a boat from the dock, you took all your 0:07:32.840 --> 0:07:34.800 shit on there. You go to this little island across 0:07:34.840 --> 0:07:37.160 from the dock. There's no bathrooms. There's like a floating 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:40.280 bathroom that you have to go to a huge, beautiful lake. 0:07:41.240 --> 0:07:42.680 And we were there for like five days. We were 0:07:42.680 --> 0:07:44.320 only supposed to be there for three, but every time 0:07:44.320 --> 0:07:46.080 it was time to go, it was just like impossible 0:07:46.080 --> 0:07:49.000 to get out of there. Luna's like they caught a fish, 0:07:49.120 --> 0:07:51.200 they skinned it, they saw the whole process. She was 0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:54.120 really intrigued by that, and like we saw a bear. 0:07:54.560 --> 0:07:56.640 Like it was just really fun and all day long 0:07:56.680 --> 0:07:58.160 we just sat in the sun. We get to go 0:07:58.240 --> 0:08:02.360 paddle boarding and swim and went on like boats and 0:08:02.920 --> 0:08:05.920 like rafting. It was really really fun. She met like 0:08:05.960 --> 0:08:08.760 she met two new friends. And I don't know how 0:08:08.760 --> 0:08:12.160 I managed to have host sleepovers on a campsite cause 0:08:12.160 --> 0:08:13.760 some people were just coming for the day. And I 0:08:13.800 --> 0:08:15.480 met this mom and she had two girls around in 0:08:15.480 --> 0:08:17.760 the same age as Luna, and she was like can 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:19.880 they do I was like, they can stay, and she's 0:08:19.880 --> 0:08:21.600 like really, And I was like, yeah, I don't really 0:08:21.600 --> 0:08:23.480 get a break offten I was like, go girl, just 0:08:23.560 --> 0:08:26.720 let them let her stay. Let them stay. Me and 0:08:26.880 --> 0:08:29.840 Lando on this like tiny, literally one person tent, but 0:08:29.880 --> 0:08:32.240 it was really fun. We didn't bathe really for like 0:08:32.280 --> 0:08:35.000 five days. We went down once to the house to 0:08:35.080 --> 0:08:36.920 go like take showers and come back. Can you like 0:08:36.960 --> 0:08:39.120 bathe in the lake or something. Yeah, I just drink 0:08:39.120 --> 0:08:42.040 a natural soapy bathed in the lake. But we just 0:08:42.080 --> 0:08:45.120 like the parents partied at night. We barely slept and 0:08:45.160 --> 0:08:49.720 then we just like everybody communal like communal, cooked, barbecued, 0:08:49.800 --> 0:08:51.880 made breakfast for the kids. Was hell of kids. It 0:08:51.960 --> 0:08:53.880 had to be at least like seventy people, a lot 0:08:53.920 --> 0:08:56.560 of teenagers. My friend who host the whole thing has 0:08:56.600 --> 0:08:58.839 like four kids of all different ages, so they're all 0:08:58.880 --> 0:09:01.920 her friends, all her kids friends from school. I was like, 0:09:01.960 --> 0:09:03.440 I feel like I'm in a high school party. I 0:09:03.480 --> 0:09:05.640 was like, Kat, we're outnumbered, bitch, I need you to 0:09:05.679 --> 0:09:09.840 have less high schoolers. And they're like Hippi high schoolers, 0:09:09.840 --> 0:09:13.840 so they smoke weed. It was very interesting, but it 0:09:13.920 --> 0:09:16.360 was like family camp. And I really enjoyed that time 0:09:16.400 --> 0:09:19.760 with Luna and like that experience because none of us 0:09:19.800 --> 0:09:22.360 have ever camped for that long. Orlando has never camped 0:09:22.360 --> 0:09:25.120 at all, so it was really fun and beautiful to 0:09:25.280 --> 0:09:29.120 just like and I realized I don't have like as adults, 0:09:29.320 --> 0:09:31.600 you know, me and Shawnie were friends when I was 0:09:31.640 --> 0:09:33.720 in like college ish, but you don't have a lot 0:09:33.760 --> 0:09:36.520 of responsibilities, so I mean we were neighbors, but like 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:39.120 since then, every time I've been in Atlanta, it's been 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:41.240 for like a show, we're for a speaking event, and 0:09:41.280 --> 0:09:43.560 we haven't like we'll have like a couple hours or 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:45.520 a day to shoot the shit, but then everybody has 0:09:45.559 --> 0:09:47.720 shit to do, so it's just nice to be like, 0:09:47.960 --> 0:09:51.440 let's just chill for a week and talk and hang 0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:53.880 out and part Like it's like, I think that we 0:09:54.440 --> 0:09:58.800 don't give our adult friendships enough like downtime. You have 0:09:58.880 --> 0:10:01.160 a lunch for two hours. You might visit for a 0:10:01.240 --> 0:10:05.440 weekend or whatever, but like overall, I hadn't just like 0:10:05.640 --> 0:10:08.240 chilled with my friend for a week. So it was 0:10:08.280 --> 0:10:11.480 like really nice to just oh, yeah, hey, like there's 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:13.120 no rush, I don't have to get everything out in 0:10:13.120 --> 0:10:15.079 two hours. I don't have to hear everything that's happened 0:10:15.160 --> 0:10:17.080 I missed. So it was just nice to just be 0:10:17.080 --> 0:10:18.839 able to chill. And I just I recommend that I 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:21.560 think a lot of times in adulthood, old friends are 0:10:21.600 --> 0:10:24.120 long distance friends. We don't get a chance to just 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:26.360 block out a certain amount of time, because there's no 0:10:26.400 --> 0:10:29.120 time for that, but like it's necessary to shoot the 0:10:29.120 --> 0:10:33.040 shit and just like chill. So I really we had 0:10:33.040 --> 0:10:35.520 a really good time. That's great. 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:40.240 Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I went camping years ago. 0:10:40.280 --> 0:10:42.160 I haven't done that kind of camping since I was 0:10:42.160 --> 0:10:44.120 like in high school. I went to Montana with a 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:48.720 boyfriend and we canoed down the river for days. 0:10:48.800 --> 0:10:50.120 Like oh yeah, I thought about you. 0:10:51.600 --> 0:10:54.960 And we bathed in the lake or the river and 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:59.959 all that. But yeah, after that experience, like it was beauty. 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:03.120 Floyd loved it. But the fucking moment I got to civilization, 0:11:03.679 --> 0:11:07.080 I was like, Okay, yeah, I need a real fucking shower, 0:11:07.640 --> 0:11:11.839 I need a real bed and air conditioning. Yeah, like yeah, 0:11:11.880 --> 0:11:13.640 you take you realize like the things you like, the 0:11:13.640 --> 0:11:15.200 little things you take for granted. Like even though you 0:11:15.280 --> 0:11:17.280 enjoyed it, like you come back and you're like, thank god, 0:11:17.600 --> 0:11:17.960 this is it. 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:21.200 Every day it was so hot. There was like we're 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:24.079 like on an incline, so like every like going up 0:11:24.120 --> 0:11:26.360 the hill was a lot. Sleeping on the floor, I 0:11:26.360 --> 0:11:28.720 mean that hot water shit and also taking a shit, 0:11:29.000 --> 0:11:31.160 Like we had a toilet set up in the back 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:34.400 of the forest and it was fine, but like I 0:11:34.440 --> 0:11:36.080 almost had to train my body, like you don't have 0:11:36.120 --> 0:11:38.120 to shit right now. You don't have to unless did 0:11:38.120 --> 0:11:44.000 you have any forest tories forest tories? I didn't. I'm 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:48.199 camping hories. We fucked every day we were there on 0:11:48.240 --> 0:11:52.600 the ground in the tent. So yeah, at first, I 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:54.600 was just like paranoid, that can people hear us? It's 0:11:54.679 --> 0:11:56.960 like not as loud as the jungle, you know, it's quiet. 0:11:56.960 --> 0:12:00.560 There's literally fifty people camping out. It's a long spanning 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:04.360 like of a little area, but still there's people all around. 0:12:04.400 --> 0:12:06.760 But it was great. And then we could like lift 0:12:06.800 --> 0:12:08.679 the tent thing up so you could see the stars 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:12.920 and the moon, and I'm like, this is sexy outside sexy, 0:12:13.000 --> 0:12:15.960 you know what it feels. It feels very primal. I 0:12:16.000 --> 0:12:18.840 was like, this makes sense. Sleeping on the ground, fucking 0:12:18.880 --> 0:12:21.640 under the stars, this is what God intended. That felt 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:25.760 very uh tribal. So it was nice. It was really fun. 0:12:26.520 --> 0:12:28.680 It's nice, you know. 0:12:28.880 --> 0:12:30.600 Speaking of friends, I had a friend come to stay 0:12:30.679 --> 0:12:34.680 with me last week. I've been like renting out my 0:12:34.800 --> 0:12:38.960 room in my house to very select people and like 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:40.680 a few months, like a month ago, I had a 0:12:40.679 --> 0:12:42.680 friend from Abu Dabi she stayed with me for like 0:12:42.720 --> 0:12:46.440 two months, and then my friend Anishka she came and 0:12:46.480 --> 0:12:49.560 stayed for a week. And it's true, like I have 0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:53.280 actually met Anishka on the internet like years ago, and 0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:55.480 so much of our lives has changed since then. Like 0:12:55.520 --> 0:12:58.440 she was not married at the time, no kids, I was. 0:12:58.800 --> 0:13:01.480 I was still with Friday at the time, and we 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:03.760 just like connected. I don't even know how I think. 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:05.920 I just like thought she was pretty and I just 0:13:06.440 --> 0:13:08.360 commented on her picture. I was looky, probably trying to 0:13:08.360 --> 0:13:13.280 flirt with her or something, You're so pretty, Yeah, because 0:13:13.280 --> 0:13:14.520 I don't know how to flirt with women, and what 0:13:14.559 --> 0:13:14.800 the fuck? 0:13:14.840 --> 0:13:15.559 I don't know how to do that. 0:13:15.480 --> 0:13:18.960 That's not my forte. This is why I'm not a lesbian. 0:13:19.080 --> 0:13:22.480 Maybe if I could get my flirting with women confidence 0:13:22.520 --> 0:13:24.840 that I could be, it could be a real lesso. 0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:30.679 Anyway, it evolved past that, and. 0:13:32.000 --> 0:13:34.240 Yeah, I realized, like we've never really hung out like 0:13:34.520 --> 0:13:36.920 for more than like two apps, maybe an hour and 0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:39.520 a half for lunch and stuff. And so you know, 0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:41.560 she came and she stayed for a week, and we 0:13:41.600 --> 0:13:44.600 got to like really like spend time together, really understand 0:13:44.640 --> 0:13:47.760 each other. She's like a piscy she's super into astrology, 0:13:48.360 --> 0:13:52.120 So like I learned so much about myself and astrology 0:13:52.160 --> 0:13:53.920 and all the stars and every person in my fucking 0:13:53.960 --> 0:13:55.320 life and why they do this and why they do 0:13:55.360 --> 0:13:57.200 that and why I'm doing this and da da da da, 0:13:58.880 --> 0:14:01.840 And yeah, it was really just nice to like connect 0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:04.120 with a woman that like I don't really know that 0:14:04.160 --> 0:14:07.080 well and like create a new bond in that way 0:14:07.160 --> 0:14:09.280 in my home. And so I was like, I really 0:14:09.320 --> 0:14:12.800 actually enjoy these like little short like stints at my 0:14:12.840 --> 0:14:13.960 house with people. 0:14:16.120 --> 0:14:16.800 I know I do know. 0:14:16.840 --> 0:14:18.400 Like there's a woman that's interested in staying in my 0:14:18.400 --> 0:14:20.360 house right now, but she wants to stay for six months. 0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:22.800 I was like, bitch, I don't know about that. 0:14:23.040 --> 0:14:25.080 Maybe I don't know. 0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:27.560 I saw her Instagram and she's doing a lot of 0:14:27.600 --> 0:14:30.400 tiktoks and I was like, I'm gonna get annoyed. 0:14:31.280 --> 0:14:33.240 Not a lot of ticks. You might get inspired, you 0:14:33.320 --> 0:14:34.520 might get some of tiktoks. 0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:37.720 And she's making a lot of Jamaican tiktoks. 0:14:38.160 --> 0:14:39.560 What is a Jamaican TikTok? 0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:42.520 She's like playing Jamaican aunties. 0:14:42.120 --> 0:14:44.000 And all types of shit. But like the acting, like 0:14:44.040 --> 0:14:45.360 the funny acting. I don't like those. 0:14:45.320 --> 0:14:48.080 Yeah, she's like, she's sweet. I don't want to talk shit, 0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:50.120 she's great. I just don't know if like six months 0:14:50.240 --> 0:14:52.440 is like my steeze when it comes to this. I'm 0:14:53.000 --> 0:14:55.360 but I like the little short, cute stint skill a 0:14:55.360 --> 0:14:59.480 little information, we get something out a little bit, then 0:14:59.520 --> 0:15:02.520 you get the fucked out of my home. 0:15:03.080 --> 0:15:08.040 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't think you could do six months. 0:15:08.560 --> 0:15:10.520 I mean, granted I'm not home a lot, but I 0:15:10.600 --> 0:15:14.160 just I don't know. I don't know, but I did 0:15:14.240 --> 0:15:19.280 enjoy our time together and and now like we like 0:15:19.320 --> 0:15:21.800 we're checking in with each other. So it's like making 0:15:22.080 --> 0:15:25.080 like adult friends, like late in life adult friends. I 0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:28.240 mean obviously like we we made friends as adults as well, 0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:31.160 but we made like I dont want to say, but 0:15:31.280 --> 0:15:33.520 we made we made friends that we became friends though 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:36.600 because we literally were going through the exact same thing 0:15:36.640 --> 0:15:38.320 at the exact same time. So we had this like 0:15:38.680 --> 0:15:40.760 who you and I, Yeah, like we have this like 0:15:40.840 --> 0:15:43.480 glue that bonded us together where it's like different when 0:15:43.520 --> 0:15:46.280 you like meet someone and it's like not necessarily going 0:15:46.280 --> 0:15:48.360 through the same thing at the same time, and like, 0:15:48.520 --> 0:15:53.240 but like maintaining those friendships can sometimes feel challenging if 0:15:53.240 --> 0:15:56.440 there's not necessarily a parallel thing happening in your life 0:15:56.480 --> 0:16:00.000 that you guys can relate to or like alond together. 0:16:00.800 --> 0:16:04.520 Also, we started we started a business in like ten minutes, 0:16:04.560 --> 0:16:06.480 and so I know, yeah, you're like, we're going to 0:16:06.520 --> 0:16:07.360 hang out once a week. 0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:12.440 Okay, Yeah, it's true. 0:16:12.680 --> 0:16:16.400 I know it's true. Though, Like as adults, we prioritize. 0:16:16.880 --> 0:16:18.560 I mean, a lot of times we have to to 0:16:18.720 --> 0:16:22.520 the responsibilities of life and our children, and it's very 0:16:22.640 --> 0:16:24.920 rare that we get time to spend time with other 0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.120 people the way we did like in high school or 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:29.960 in college when there wasn't as much responsibility that I 0:16:30.000 --> 0:16:32.360 realized it's like it's super important. Even my friend who 0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:34.320 I'm talking about, who I hung out with, who I 0:16:34.320 --> 0:16:36.160 haven't hung out with in this way in a while, 0:16:36.600 --> 0:16:39.760 Like her kids now are like eighteen. She has twins 0:16:39.800 --> 0:16:43.400 that are eighteen and a third daughter that is sixteen. 0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:45.520 And I grew like they grew up with me when 0:16:45.560 --> 0:16:46.920 they were like I met them when they were two 0:16:46.960 --> 0:16:50.120 and three and getting to see them as women. And 0:16:50.160 --> 0:16:51.880 I'm like, damn, I haven't even really spent time with 0:16:51.920 --> 0:16:54.920 your kids because I've been moving around and like getting 0:16:54.920 --> 0:16:56.920 to see them as women. One of them brought their boyfriend. 0:16:57.080 --> 0:16:58.480 Have they like they live in Atlanta, they go to 0:16:58.480 --> 0:17:01.000 Georgia State, but they were they're visiting for the summer. 0:17:01.040 --> 0:17:02.800 Their boyfriend was there. I'm like, what the fuck do 0:17:02.840 --> 0:17:05.760 you think you are with this boyfriend? But it's just 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:07.160 like they used to call me mommy, used to pick 0:17:07.160 --> 0:17:09.240 them up from school. That was like my first experience 0:17:09.680 --> 0:17:12.120 being with kids to that capacity, and my first mom 0:17:12.160 --> 0:17:13.920 friend for real, for real, because I was really young. 0:17:13.960 --> 0:17:16.960 We're eight years apart. But like, yeah, like spend times 0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:19.639 with your spend time with your friends kids, like be 0:17:19.720 --> 0:17:22.200 the auntie and like spend time with your friends and 0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:25.919 without having anything to do. And I know that seems 0:17:26.000 --> 0:17:28.640 like such a hard thing because we have bills and shit, 0:17:28.760 --> 0:17:31.480 but like it's necessary and it was really nice and 0:17:31.720 --> 0:17:34.080 it's different. It's sorry, go ahead. I was just like 0:17:34.119 --> 0:17:36.439 and also even with her friends, like at first, I 0:17:36.480 --> 0:17:38.720 was like telling Orlando, like, Okay, I'm gonna warn you 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:42.040 this is a very interesting group of hippie whites and 0:17:42.400 --> 0:17:45.800 just be prepared. But like even getting to know them 0:17:45.880 --> 0:17:47.840 and hang out with them, like it was a nice 0:17:48.040 --> 0:17:48.920 It was a nice time. 0:17:50.040 --> 0:17:53.439 Yeah, sometimes the brunch is not enough. Sometimes the brunch 0:17:53.520 --> 0:17:57.480 is very surface. You're literally just glazing over, like you're 0:17:57.560 --> 0:17:59.360 just checking off check boxes. 0:17:59.359 --> 0:18:01.080 That has the kids. So how's your relationship? 0:18:01.080 --> 0:18:01.800 Ooh that sucks? 0:18:01.840 --> 0:18:02.160 He did? 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:02.280 What? 0:18:02.560 --> 0:18:06.120 Oh crazy? So how's work? Like it's just so there's 0:18:06.160 --> 0:18:08.040 no there's really no it's not even your fault. There's 0:18:08.040 --> 0:18:09.920 just no time for depth, you know. So like when 0:18:09.920 --> 0:18:12.760 you're waking up in the morning with people and like 0:18:12.760 --> 0:18:15.640 like I'm waking up making coffee. She's coming down, We're 0:18:15.680 --> 0:18:18.400 having our coffee, we're drinking. We're drinking our coffee, having 0:18:18.440 --> 0:18:21.840 a joint hula hooping outside I gave I showed her 0:18:21.840 --> 0:18:22.520 my hula. 0:18:22.240 --> 0:18:23.960 Hoops, and now I feel like I feel like that's 0:18:23.960 --> 0:18:24.359 my calling. 0:18:24.480 --> 0:18:26.159 Like I need to like really lead the women to 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:31.639 hula late hula hula hooping has like become such a 0:18:31.760 --> 0:18:34.280