Speaker 1: Where are you in my living room?
Speaker 2: What's going on?
Speaker 3: I'm just hanging out, kind of looking at the lights.
Speaker 3: Been a hope for a little bit, watching the show.
Speaker 3: Girlfriend just went to sleep, so I've just been chilling.
Speaker 2: How can I get you today? Is there anything in
Speaker 2: particularly called in to talk about?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 3: Well, I got bit today, and honestly, like stuff like
Speaker 3: this is a normal occurrence. I just don't really know
Speaker 3: how to deal with it anymore. Kind of over it,
Speaker 3: and I kind of feel bad because I think it's
Speaker 3: my responsibility not to be over it. So I'm just conflicted.
Speaker 2: So it says here that you are a bit today
Speaker 2: by a human child, and that you work with children
Speaker 2: that have behavioral issues. Is that accurate?
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's very accurate.
Speaker 2: It tough job, tough it is, So tell me this.
Speaker 2: I'm sure you knew before you got into it that
Speaker 2: it would be a tough job, and yet you chose
Speaker 2: to get into it anyway. Why did you make that decision?
Speaker 3: Well, I you know, I love the community I grew
Speaker 3: up in. I've loved sports in general, and so I
Speaker 3: started coaching, you know, local basketball teams as a side hobby,
Speaker 3: and I realized there's something I really love to do.
Speaker 3: So I tried to get back into my you know,
Speaker 3: hometown system where I can start coaching and you know,
Speaker 3: just being a part of something again. And it's just
Speaker 3: been something that has brought me like a lot of
Speaker 3: joy and purpose in my life. But I'm not like
Speaker 3: somebody that has a typical degree, So being in the
Speaker 3: school systems just hard in general. So I kind of
Speaker 3: have to get in where I can fit in. And
Speaker 3: being in one of these roles as like a helper
Speaker 3: for you know, these kids with special needs, you know,
Speaker 3: is a great way to get into these districts, but
Speaker 3: it just kind of sucks in general, just because you're
Speaker 3: more or less just viewed as not you know, super
Speaker 3: important or a super integral to anything that.
Speaker 2: Really you feel as though this job working with special
Speaker 2: needs kids, you feel as though it is it is
Speaker 2: not a respectable or not respectable, but not a respected
Speaker 2: around the community.
Speaker 3: Well yeah, like and it's not something I guess I
Speaker 3: necessarily knew what before I got the job. After getting
Speaker 3: the job, and just like through social media and stuff,
Speaker 3: I see like, yeah, this is definitely something where other
Speaker 3: people have these same issues where they you know, are
Speaker 3: stressed out about what's going on, and they do with
Speaker 3: too much at work for you know, to be honest,
Speaker 3: not enough pay. It's just it's just tough. So I
Speaker 3: feel like I'm in this box where I did actually
Speaker 3: end up being getting into a situation where I'm able
Speaker 3: to coach. So I am coaching now and I'm loving it.
Speaker 3: But my day to day is just so awful, and
Speaker 3: you know, getting bit and punched and slapped and kicked
Speaker 3: and cussed out by children you know who I know,
Speaker 3: you know can't necessarily control it, so it's not their fault.
Speaker 1: I just need it.
Speaker 3: It's just a weird anger. Not anger, but it's just
Speaker 3: a weird emotion to have because you're not really sure
Speaker 3: who to direct your frustrations at.
Speaker 2: So I wanted just the thing you said at the
Speaker 2: beginning where you were like, you feel as though part
Speaker 2: of the job is dealing with I forget exactly what
Speaker 2: you said, but you said something where that that indicated
Speaker 2: that you were feeling guilty about this feeling you have
Speaker 2: of of it being too much, and of not wanting
Speaker 2: to do it anymore.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because honestly, like you build these relationships with these kids,
Speaker 3: and you know, if I'm not even if I'm not
Speaker 3: a full on teacher. Like these kids come to school
Speaker 3: every day and they, you know, look forward to seeing me,
Speaker 3: and I look forward to seeing them and having our
Speaker 3: little interactions. But at the end of the day, I'm
Speaker 3: not able to pay my bills. I'm not able to do,
Speaker 3: you know, extra things for my girlfriend who deserves it,
Speaker 3: who's supposed to hell out of me, you know. And
Speaker 3: so it's just like it's a really conflicting place to
Speaker 3: be in. So now I'm like, like, I need to
Speaker 3: get out and get something better. That way I can
Speaker 3: get to the next stage in life. But at the
Speaker 3: same time, I know they're not going to hire somebody
Speaker 3: that maybe cares as much as I do. And maybe
Speaker 3: it's because they didn't grow up in the same town
Speaker 3: as me, you know, and they don't see themselves and
Speaker 3: these children.
Speaker 1: But I don't know.
Speaker 3: It's one of those tough things where it's like, Okay,
Speaker 3: if I give up on everybody else's too.
Speaker 2: That's a lot. That's a lot. That's a lot.
Speaker 3: I just don't want to be bit Yeah, I mean that's.
Speaker 2: A reasonable desire to have. Let's can we start there,
Speaker 2: just that that's a reasonable desire to not want to
Speaker 2: get a bit. You know, you're I think you're demanding
Speaker 2: this like superman like energy out of yourself. That it
Speaker 2: is not realistic off the bat. Yeah, because you're like
Speaker 2: guilty about the fact that you don't want children to
Speaker 2: bite you and hit you.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But also I get it, I understand what you're saying.
Speaker 2: You feel as though you feel this responsibility which is
Speaker 2: noble of you. It's noble of you, And there's many
Speaker 2: I don't know, man, it's it's this is tough thing,
Speaker 2: and I don't know either way, because there's a lot
Speaker 2: of different schools of thought about it. There's a school
Speaker 2: of thought to nobility, which is that you you kind
Speaker 2: of take on pain and discomforts and unruliness of these
Speaker 2: kids and you do it for the noble higher purpose
Speaker 2: that if you give up on them, do everyone else will.
Speaker 2: And there's something to that school of thoughts. But there's
Speaker 2: a lot of other schools of thought that could say, well,
Speaker 2: you're a human being too, and you need to recognize
Speaker 2: your own fallibility that yeah, getting kicked and hit sucks,
Speaker 2: and if you can't do it anymore and you don't
Speaker 2: have the energy, then it's a disservice. To yourself and
Speaker 2: possibly even to the kids, for you to be involved
Speaker 2: in something that you know is just fucking weighing down
Speaker 2: on you. And I don't know where I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: say that any of those are the right choice, but
Speaker 2: maybe that is the point here, Maybe that neither of
Speaker 2: those is the right choice, you know what I'm saying. So, yeah,
Speaker 2: whatever you do decide to go with, I would hope
Speaker 2: that there is I hope that the understanding that neither
Speaker 2: of those is the quote right choice helps you with
Speaker 2: the kind of cognitive dissonance of it, you know, as
Speaker 2: in whichever you choose you can lean into. If you
Speaker 2: decide that you want to this on as a noble
Speaker 2: purpose and you want to you know, go at it
Speaker 2: warrior mode, then all right, we can lean into that,
Speaker 2: and we can take pride in the fact that that's
Speaker 2: what we've chosen and that you know, it's not the
Speaker 2: wrong choice. And if we want to do the other
Speaker 2: thing and we want to go I need to live
Speaker 2: my own life and not get fucking, you know, stuff
Speaker 2: thrown at me all the time, then you know that's
Speaker 2: not the wrong choice either. Yeah, what do you think
Speaker 2: about all of that?
Speaker 3: No, it's it's you bring up you know, a lot
Speaker 3: of other points, even just the stuff weighing down on me.
Speaker 3: I felt that today, Let's say I coached basketball, so, uh,
Speaker 3: like I went to practice today after you know, having
Speaker 3: a tough day at work. I just felt myself being
Speaker 3: a little bit more heavy on, you know, the the
Speaker 3: other kids that I work with, and at the end
Speaker 3: of the day, they are kids like their high schoolers,
Speaker 3: and so it's just like, Okay, now I'm you know,
Speaker 3: face face with a lot of emotions, you know there
Speaker 3: it's like, okay, you know, now you're not you're not
Speaker 3: being the best you. And I've been having more and
Speaker 3: more thoughts of like, uh, I only do get one life,
Speaker 3: so yeah, I have to kind of choose how I
Speaker 3: live it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the next step.
Speaker 3: It's pretty crucial. I love what I do, Like I
Speaker 3: wish I could do what I do forever. Honestly, if
Speaker 3: I was getting paid enough to live on, I could
Speaker 3: get you know, punched and slapped and kicked by a
Speaker 3: billion of these kids. Like it doesn't matter to me.
Speaker 3: But yeah, you know, whenever you have to go home
Speaker 3: and face you know, other realities, that's just makes it tougher.
Speaker 2: So what state do you live in?
Speaker 1: Can?
Speaker 2: I ask, uh, Kansas, Kansas and they don't. And your
Speaker 2: high school teacher?
Speaker 3: Uh, so I work in the elementary school and.
Speaker 2: I yeah, I think you said they were high school kids.
Speaker 3: So I coach at the high school level.
Speaker 2: You coach at the high school, Okay, And you don't
Speaker 2: really get paid to coach that much? You met. Your
Speaker 2: main job where you can pay it is the elementary school.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, essentially I get a stipend for coaching, but with
Speaker 3: the hours I have to miss because I'm hourly, and
Speaker 3: that a normal teacher, I actually end up losing money,
Speaker 3: you know, driving back and forth and taking hours out
Speaker 3: of the check to go over and coach. Yeah, but
Speaker 3: that's that's something I knew I was going to have
Speaker 3: to do, so that's not as big a deal to me.
Speaker 2: Hey, you bring up a good point when you say
Speaker 2: that you only have one life, and is this how
Speaker 2: I really want to live it? I mean, I always
Speaker 2: think that that's what's a prime way to think about
Speaker 2: That's a prime framing device upon which to to think
Speaker 2: about your life. You know that it's crazy, crazy short, Yeah,
Speaker 2: and you should you know. Yeah, it's tough man, Yeah.
Speaker 3: Tough honestly though, like you know, I've been reading some
Speaker 3: books that have been you know, interested in Again, I
Speaker 3: haven't been reading it in a while, you know, for
Speaker 3: the last couple of years of my life. So I've
Speaker 3: been kind of just rethinking myself and you know, listening
Speaker 3: to podcasts. Me and my girlfriend discovered you about a
Speaker 3: year ago, and it's I mean, stuff you say, man,
Speaker 3: it changes some of my perspectives. So I got to
Speaker 3: thank you there and it's helped me to the last
Speaker 3: couple you know whatever months and just trying to be
Speaker 3: a better human about it.
Speaker 2: Cool. I'm glad to hear that. I think. Fuck, man,
Speaker 2: I don't know. You're doing the best you can out here.
Speaker 2: I feel like that's all you can do, right, I mean,
Speaker 2: you gave if if anything, if anything, I hope that
Speaker 2: whatever you choose, listen, listen. First of all, so many people,
Speaker 2: more people than not, have been like fuck those kids.
Speaker 2: Why would I ever want to do that? That's like
Speaker 2: most that's me, by the way, I would never do this.
Speaker 2: I'd never do this. So for you, well, okay, and
Speaker 2: I don't say that. I say that. I say that
Speaker 2: to me. For you to do it is a lot
Speaker 2: for you to do it for however much time you
Speaker 2: did it. For you to do it, you literally like
Speaker 2: to do it until you cannot any longer. Is so much.
Speaker 2: So whatever you decide to take, you know, pride in that.
Speaker 3: Thank you and I will.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just thank you for talking to me about this.
Speaker 3: And there's been a lot on my chest. And honestly,
Speaker 3: it's not something I can talk to my coworkers about
Speaker 3: because it just gets weird, you know, because now you're
Speaker 3: talking to your boss about how much you hit your
Speaker 3: job and just stuff like that. And my girlfriend, like,
Speaker 3: you know, I don't like bothering her with about it
Speaker 3: every day because you know, you'd like to keep their positive.
Speaker 2: So well, well, well I want to say that it's
Speaker 2: it's you mentioned a funny thing just now. Your coworkers,
Speaker 2: I mean, not necessarily your bosses, but the other coaches,
Speaker 2: how do they feel about this ship?
Speaker 3: So they don't kind of have different you know life,
Speaker 3: you know places. Some of them work at the high
Speaker 3: school level, so they kind of make a salary and
Speaker 3: they you know, they've been making some money for a while,
Speaker 3: so they're a little more comfortable online. Another like a
Speaker 3: couple other ones have other jobs to where they have
Speaker 3: good money. So I'm the only one that's really still
Speaker 3: at that first stage of life still and it's due
Speaker 3: to me making them just like silly choices in my
Speaker 3: early twenties, which is whatever, Like that's everybody. But I'm
Speaker 3: just kind of trying to play catch up. But I'm
Speaker 3: trying to play catch up my way to I don't
Speaker 3: really want to, you know, if I'm forcing this box
Speaker 3: where I have to go to the conventional route, I
Speaker 3: guess I'll have to at the end of the day.
Speaker 3: But I'm just trying to, you know, do what I can.
Speaker 2: Josh, thanks for all the kind of words and for
Speaker 2: you know, getting bit by children so that so that
Speaker 2: I and many others don't have to.
Speaker 3: Hey, lal h, thank you for your kind of words.
Speaker 2: Zid anything else you want to say to the people
Speaker 2: of the computer before we go.
Speaker 3: No, you know, live your life. Be you. Like I said,
Speaker 3: you only get one life, so it's true. Uh, do
Speaker 3: what you can to make sure it is the best
Speaker 3: one for you.
Speaker 2: Hey, take care Josh, you too. I liked I liked him.
Speaker 2: I liked him he was nice. I didn't just like
Speaker 2: him because he was nice to me. Sometimes I like
Speaker 2: people when they're when they're mean to me, So you know,
Speaker 2: you can't make me like you just by being nice.
Speaker 2: I liked him because, well, because he was nice and
Speaker 2: I felt just I kind of felt him because that's
Speaker 2: a tough thing with the with the money, and I
Speaker 2: don't I was gonna say something about how it's a
Speaker 2: failure of the system, but I'm I don't like talking
Speaker 2: about social economics stuff because I'm stupid and I have
Speaker 2: no idea what I'm talking about. But he's really doing
Speaker 2: the best he can. I could tell he.
Speaker 1: Is.
Speaker 2: I could tell he was like he's down to go
Speaker 2: the fucking warrior mode of like, I believe in what
Speaker 2: I'm doing so much that I don't care about getting
Speaker 2: pissed on by high school kids. But he just can't
Speaker 2: because they're not paying him enough to to do it,
Speaker 2: and it's a bummer. But again, I meant what I
Speaker 2: said when I was like, I wouldn't do this. Most
Speaker 2: of the people who are stending to this right now
Speaker 2: wouldn't do it. So the fact that he did it
Speaker 2: for any amount of time is something to be proud of.
Speaker 2: And I hope he finds a good balance where he's
Speaker 2: not fucking killing himself just to serve this cause, but
Speaker 2: feels as though he's doing a thing that is, like
Speaker 2: he was saying, worthy of his short amount of time
Speaker 2: on the earth. I let's take a call. Hell, Hi,
Speaker 2: who is this?
Speaker 5: This is Chloe?
Speaker 2: Hi? Chloe has gone going good?
Speaker 5: How about you?
Speaker 2: I am, I'm feeling pretty good. Actually, I'm I'm I'm
Speaker 2: I'm on a I'm on a spiritual journey, Chloe. I'm
Speaker 2: trying to protect my peace more. I'm trying to work
Speaker 2: as a little as I possibly can, take more deep breaths,
Speaker 2: and I do not eat thirty pieces of candy in
Speaker 2: one day. It's going all right.
Speaker 5: You know those are good goals. It sounds like you're
Speaker 5: crafting mindfulness a bit.
Speaker 2: I'm trying. I mean, I get up on this fucking
Speaker 2: podcast and everyone's asking me about what to do in
Speaker 2: their lives, and I hope they know that I have
Speaker 2: absolutely no idea. I don't know.
Speaker 5: I don't know what to do with my own hearing
Speaker 5: advice and my get go.
Speaker 2: What's going on with you, Chloe?
Speaker 5: Oh not much. I'm chilling in bed right now talking
Speaker 5: to you.
Speaker 2: Why what did what did you do? Today?
Speaker 6: Let's see, I went to the gym, had a crazy
Speaker 6: sessions and got back and just had to meet myself an.
Speaker 5: I day and I had a therapy session and I
Speaker 5: just chilled and I watched you and here I am.
Speaker 2: Now, how do you feel right now? Do you feel therapized?
Speaker 5: I feel relaxed, but that's probably because I am good.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm, well listen, uh, you did tell the call
Speaker 2: screen or something and I got you told the call
Speaker 2: screen or that your mom wishes that you were gay.
Speaker 5: Yeah, she kind of wished that ever since I was
Speaker 5: in high school.
Speaker 2: What your what your mom? Ever since? Ever since she
Speaker 2: was in high school, she wished that you were gay, Like,
Speaker 2: ever since she was in high school, she wish she
Speaker 2: had a gay daughter.
Speaker 5: No, no, ever since I was in high school. Basically,
Speaker 5: I think there's a few reasons for it, but I
Speaker 5: believe in love at first sight, and I only experienced
Speaker 5: that once in my life. It was when I was
Speaker 5: in high school, and it was with a girl. Nothing
Speaker 5: ever came of it, but I think that's when she
Speaker 5: started really pushing for me to be gay. And I
Speaker 5: don't know ever since, with any time that I've had
Speaker 5: a partner, they've all been men. It's like they lose
Speaker 5: brownie points for not being a woman.
Speaker 2: Man. Your poor mother.
Speaker 5: I mean, I think her part is in the right place.
Speaker 5: It's just for for me, it's a little bit. It
Speaker 5: caused me to question things because she hasn't really ever
Speaker 5: steered me wrong and and parents don't know everything that
Speaker 5: She's been pretty dan right a lot of the time
Speaker 5: and interesting. Sometimes I'm like, should.
Speaker 2: I be mm hmm Okay, So your mother has uh,
Speaker 2: you know, given you advice and direction in life that
Speaker 2: has been very beneficial to you, and so part of
Speaker 2: you is wondering if if maybe she's right and you
Speaker 2: should be gay.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I'm bye h. But I've never really
Speaker 5: explored her relationship.
Speaker 2: Wait your your your bye. Yeah, that's a really good compromise.
Speaker 2: She has to admit.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, well, I think her argument is that
Speaker 5: since I've never explored it, that I should.
Speaker 2: Okay, your your mom's your her mom said to you
Speaker 2: that you should explore sexually with other Like, Okay, Here's
Speaker 2: what I wanted to ask when you said your mom
Speaker 2: has pushed you to be gay? What does that actually
Speaker 2: look like? What does that mean?
Speaker 5: It means that? Okay, So when it started in high school,
Speaker 5: it was very subtle. It was always like, you know,
Speaker 5: I'd be okay with it if you want to date
Speaker 5: a girl, or she would try to elude that my
Speaker 5: girl friend.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: But in adulthood it's been more like, you know, you
Speaker 5: try to date a woman, don't don't go with that guy.
Speaker 5: Go need a girl first. When I'm in a relationship,
Speaker 5: a committed one, she always just kind of hyes, And
Speaker 5: I just know what she's dying at. I know what
Speaker 5: she wishes, she wishes, but I was an independent woman
Speaker 5: living in a wife with a girlfriend, with maybe two
Speaker 5: cats in a high ride. That's what she wishes.
Speaker 2: Here's what I think. Here's what I think. Obviously, we
Speaker 2: all know you cannot choose your sexuality. And I think
Speaker 2: your mom, I think your mom is. I think your
Speaker 2: mom wishes she was gay.
Speaker 5: You know it could be, but she's married to a man.
Speaker 2: She's been through I think she's had terrible experiences with men.
Speaker 2: She wishes that she was gay, but and so because
Speaker 2: but because she can't just be gay, she I guess,
Speaker 2: wants you to be gay so she can live vicariously
Speaker 2: through you.
Speaker 5: I mean, it's so strange though, because I have a
Speaker 5: trans brother and before he was trans. He was dating
Speaker 5: a girl for school, so it's like she could live
Speaker 5: vicarious him, but she wants to do it through me.
Speaker 2: Wait, so your brother is trans and I guess before
Speaker 2: they transitioned they were presenting as female yeah, and dating
Speaker 2: a woman yes, and then transitioned into a straight man.
Speaker 7: Yes.
Speaker 2: And your poor fucking mother she almost had.
Speaker 5: Her dream almost almost.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's a it's a strange family. My mom's students,
Speaker 5: My brother is Wickan, and my sister is Jewish.
Speaker 2: Your brother is Wickan? What does that mean?
Speaker 5: It's a vein off of paganism. I belief that's sick. Yeah,
Speaker 5: it's pretty cool anytime that I go to him and
Speaker 5: his wife, But they do rituals. I'm not like candles.
Speaker 5: I think there's something to do with gods and goddesses.
Speaker 5: It's interesting.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm hmm. I So let me ask you this
Speaker 2: in seriousness. Do you have a good relationship with your mom?
Speaker 5: Yeah? I definitely do. I went to go with her
Speaker 5: in Wales for three months last year and it helps
Speaker 5: me so much.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm mm hm.
Speaker 5: Call her pretty much every time you get out of
Speaker 5: the gyms here, so we're staying connected.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm hm, Well that's good. M Uh, Like, how
Speaker 2: often is she she is she still like she's she's
Speaker 2: still unrelentingly trying to push you to be gay. Uh.
Speaker 5: You know, she's definitely backed off in the past six
Speaker 5: months or so because I have been with someone for
Speaker 5: two and a half years now and she's kind of
Speaker 5: gotten to a point of chasey. But it's also she
Speaker 5: always she does something to ask you know if I
Speaker 5: ever thought about exploring that side of things, and it
Speaker 5: just I know I am thinking about it really too
Speaker 5: long after those conversations with her. Yeah, No, it's uh,
Speaker 5: but I don't want to sacrifize a great relationship or
Speaker 5: something like that for exploring something.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 2: Have you told your mom? Uh that it's that it's
Speaker 2: weird to keep asking you if you're gay.
Speaker 5: I I guess it felt normal because she been doing
Speaker 5: it for so long that I never thought to tell
Speaker 5: her that.
Speaker 2: Okay, I mean, does it bother you?
Speaker 5: No, it just makes a question. Thanks, It makes a
Speaker 5: question in my relationship and questions I'm making the right
Speaker 5: choice or not?
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, what's your name? Club? You seem like a
Speaker 2: very sweet person and sounds like you have a good
Speaker 2: life of family that you care about, a partner that
Speaker 2: you care about. I have no idea what your mom's
Speaker 2: deal is, but I hope that you you don't let her.
Speaker 2: I don't know warm into your head about whether or
Speaker 2: not you are making the right decisions with your life.
Speaker 2: Because are you happy right now?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Okay, Well you got there based on following your decisions,
Speaker 2: so I assume that following your own decisions will lead
Speaker 2: you to further happiness in the future.
Speaker 7: Thank you.
Speaker 5: I think you're right, but.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't Maybe your mom knows more
Speaker 2: than me.
Speaker 5: Maybe maybe she has a crystal ball.
Speaker 2: Uh Chloe, is there anything else that you want to
Speaker 2: say to me or the people of the computer before
Speaker 2: we go?
Speaker 5: Uh? No, No, it was nice chatting with you.
Speaker 2: It's nice chatting with you too, Chloe. Thank you very
Speaker 2: much for calling.
Speaker 5: Good night.
Speaker 2: Hello.
Speaker 7: Hi is this Loyle?
Speaker 2: Yes? Who is this?
Speaker 6: Hey?
Speaker 2: What's your What's what's what's your life like?
Speaker 3: It's good.
Speaker 7: I live in San Francisco. Been working a lot fucking
Speaker 7: expensive fuck to live here, but still doing it as
Speaker 7: best I can. I'm gonna see you with my friend
Speaker 7: Chris see who I turned onto your stream. We just
Speaker 7: got tickets in San Francisco.
Speaker 2: Fuck yeah, man at the Swedish American Hall. I've heard
Speaker 2: it's a great venue. I'm very excited.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's awesome. I've seen a lot of good shows there.
Speaker 2: So listen, Evan. Is there anything in particular you wanted
Speaker 2: to talk about today?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 7: Actually, uh, I wanted to thank you for being part
Speaker 7: of connecting me with my current partner. I dressed as
Speaker 7: the Therapy Echo for Halloween this past year and met
Speaker 7: them at the Goth Night, which is fucking hilarious and awesome.
Speaker 7: They're listening right now, I think too really, but yeah,
Speaker 7: we're in like separate houses, but yeah, I wanted to
Speaker 7: shouts them out high.
Speaker 2: Nas, Hello Nas. So your partner, like what do they
Speaker 2: say to you?
Speaker 7: We had like I think we had matched on like
Speaker 7: bumble or hinge or something like maybe a week or
Speaker 7: two before and then like the day of Halloween, we're like,
Speaker 7: oh yeah, like kind of like what are you doing
Speaker 7: for Halloween? And it turned out we were both going
Speaker 7: to the same like party at DNA Lounge. They do
Speaker 7: like a goth night that like a couple of my
Speaker 7: friends go to regularly, and they had invited me to
Speaker 7: go to, and I was nervous about like having a
Speaker 7: costume or whatever because I haven't dressed up in a
Speaker 7: long time. But I was just like, well, fuck, if
Speaker 7: I'm gonna go like and I'm gonna be at a
Speaker 7: goth night, like, what would be a fun se to couss.
Speaker 7: So instantly Therapy Get Go was was the jam.
Speaker 2: How much was your costume? Because I bought two today
Speaker 2: and they were both ninety dollars.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it was around that I'm gonna rel.
Speaker 2: You spent ninety for me. I'm like, I'm never gonna
Speaker 2: for me. I'm like, I'm never gonna regret buying a
Speaker 2: gecko costume because I need them all the time. But
Speaker 2: you bought you spent ninety dollars on this fucking costume
Speaker 2: to wear it one day?
Speaker 1: Fuck?
Speaker 7: Yeah, dude, Well I got to wear it to two
Speaker 7: parties like over that weekend.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's worth it.
Speaker 1: But uh yeah, I had.
Speaker 7: A question for you actually about uh, like you have
Speaker 7: a couple of them? You bought two today?
Speaker 2: You said, right, I did, I bought to today?
Speaker 7: What like in terms of maintenance, I had to throw
Speaker 7: away the feet after like one night out because they
Speaker 7: were fucking horrifying.
Speaker 2: So so on tour. No, no, I finish your question.
Speaker 2: Now you finish your question that all hop in.
Speaker 7: Is there any way to like treat them because I
Speaker 7: kept the hands in the head because I think they're
Speaker 7: funny and they're like hanging up in my room. But uh, yeah,
Speaker 7: the feet were destroyed after like one night out like
Speaker 7: walking around in San Francisco. They're fucking disgusting.
Speaker 2: The feet get totally fucked The reason I have to
Speaker 2: buy I have. So here's the thing I have. I have.
Speaker 2: I have infinite amount of heads. I have so many heads,
Speaker 2: so many torsos, and so many pants, but I'm always
Speaker 2: low on feet and hands because the feet they get
Speaker 2: fucked up all the time. So I'll typically I'll have
Speaker 2: to spend ninety bucks to buy a whole costume just
Speaker 2: for the feet because I'm I'm always running the long
Speaker 2: feet because they get fucked up so easily. And I'm
Speaker 2: about to go on this you know, crazy tour, and
Speaker 2: so I'm gonna need and you're yes, you're correct. The
Speaker 2: feet get fucked up anytime you wear them out, So yeah,
Speaker 2: you gotta.
Speaker 7: Like, honestly, you should reach out to the company that
Speaker 7: makes them and see if they could do like a
Speaker 7: bespoke deal for you and be like, hey, like I
Speaker 7: need x amount of feet, like give me like four hundred.
Speaker 1: Of these bad boys.
Speaker 7: And like a good a good chunk of hands because
Speaker 7: I feel like, yeah, everything else is pretty durable. Like
Speaker 7: the suit itself is fine, like even just from like
Speaker 7: two nights out, and like, honestly, the the club that
Speaker 7: I was at was like really packed and like I
Speaker 7: got trampled a bit though, Like that definitely put more
Speaker 7: wear and tear on it than like either sitting on
Speaker 7: stage or like talking to somebody like out in the world.
Speaker 2: But who See, here's the thing is, I might I've
Speaker 2: thought about reaching out to the company that makes them,
Speaker 2: but I'm scared to negotiate with them because and look,
Speaker 2: maybe it's not a good idea to say this publicly,
Speaker 2: but here's the thing that I need them so much
Speaker 2: more than they need me.
Speaker 7: You have no idea that this is the feel like
Speaker 7: you're getting to a point that the tables could turn though.
Speaker 2: No, no, Evan, Evan and Evan. If they stop making
Speaker 2: this Gecko costume, my career is over them. Fucked.
Speaker 7: There's gotta be some There's gotta be some listeners. That
Speaker 7: have like crazy etsy businesses that would make you some
Speaker 7: bespoke suits, like I don't know why that isn't a
Speaker 7: thing already.
Speaker 4: Well, look, i'll tell you what I had to go
Speaker 4: to the same plate.
Speaker 2: If you ever want to make your ninety dollars, if
Speaker 2: you ever want to you know, if you ever want
Speaker 2: to make your ninety dollars back, you know, hang on
Speaker 2: to that suit and maybe one day I'll buy it
Speaker 2: off of you.
Speaker 7: It'll be missing feet, which is like the most important part.
Speaker 1: Twenty dollars, it's yours.
Speaker 7: I'll say, I'll bring you. You said you got too
Speaker 7: many heads, but I'll bring you an extra pair of
Speaker 7: hands that are only lightly used.
Speaker 1: When I come see you in San Francisco. There might gift.
Speaker 2: Pciate that. I appreciate that. By the way, I want
Speaker 2: to say something. I appreciate that you said that I
Speaker 2: helped you meet your partner, But in the story you
Speaker 2: told I had nothing to do with it. You guys
Speaker 2: just matched on bumble.
Speaker 7: Well yeah, I mean, but it was their first time,
Speaker 7: like meeting in person, like the first time we saw
Speaker 7: each other in real life. Like I was full, like
Speaker 7: I did the green face paint, I did everything like
Speaker 7: I tried to go screen accurate. I bought, I brought
Speaker 7: a microphone.
Speaker 2: So I just made you look a little bit insane.
Speaker 2: I actually detracted from.
Speaker 1: This not at all.
Speaker 7: I I had a couple of people actually come up,
Speaker 7: Like I got a lot of people asking if I
Speaker 7: was like Yoshi or like a frog. But I had
Speaker 7: quite a few people that recognized me as Therapy get
Speaker 7: Go and some people that actually thought.
Speaker 1: I was you.
Speaker 2: That's fucking sick. That's amazing.
Speaker 7: Yeah, they were all really stoked, Like everyone that knew
Speaker 7: what it was were like really fucking hyped, Like you
Speaker 7: got a lot of love in San Francisco.
Speaker 2: Damn, that's fucking sick. That's awesome. I'm sure that way
Speaker 2: more people just thought you were frog, though.
Speaker 7: I did get a couple of frogs, but I think
Speaker 7: it was also I don't know what the full crossover is,
Speaker 7: but gos knight is definitely has like a higher capita
Speaker 7: I think of just out in the world like than
Speaker 7: out in the world. People who recognized me as Therapy Gecko,
Speaker 7: which is kind of fun.
Speaker 2: What did your what did your partner address.
Speaker 7: As they were in like latex like bondage gear.
Speaker 2: Well, it sounds like you two had a we got
Speaker 2: one night.
Speaker 7: We did we like right after we met, like five
Speaker 7: minutes after a meeting in person, we took like photo
Speaker 7: booth pictures that are fucking hilarious. I can I can
Speaker 7: send you on the on Instagram if you want. But yeah,
Speaker 7: it was I actually tagged you, like.
Speaker 2: When I was walking around you tagged me in them.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I I not in that one. But when I
Speaker 7: was like walking around like in SF and like getting
Speaker 7: gacked out by like my friends, they like, I tagged
Speaker 7: you in a couple of photos of me as there
Speaker 7: if you get go on Halloween, and you liked them,
Speaker 7: and I said, thank you.
Speaker 2: Ah, yes I did. I saw a lot of people
Speaker 2: who are I I like to that night. I went
Speaker 2: through my like mentions and liked all the photos of
Speaker 2: people dressed as me. But I didn't see any versions
Speaker 2: of me that were being uh masochistically choked by someone
Speaker 2: in other I'll have to go back and look though.
Speaker 2: We're out there, Evan, is there anything else you want
Speaker 2: to say to the people of the computer. I appreciate
Speaker 2: your homage.
Speaker 7: No, man, honestly, I'm just really so talk to you.
Speaker 7: It's called in a couple of times I've gotten through
Speaker 7: to your call screeners who were super nice, like it
Speaker 7: was great to hear them on the stream. This has
Speaker 7: been a great stream tonight, Like I caught most of it.
Speaker 7: I started listening when I was at work and it
Speaker 7: got me through to getting home. I'll say that the
Speaker 7: survivor of the Weeni War.
Speaker 2: I'll say this. I want to say this, fucking oh,
Speaker 2: if you have one more usage of the gecko costume,
Speaker 2: wear it to the show?
Speaker 4: Really?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 7: My friends who got us the tickets was asking and
Speaker 7: they were just like, should we should we go all
Speaker 7: as geckos? And I was like, that's kind of crazy,
Speaker 7: but like people.
Speaker 2: Have people people have done that before. Where if you
Speaker 2: and no one listening to this, if you're coming to
Speaker 2: the live show and you have a gecko guys, wear
Speaker 2: it to the show, please show your dedications. So I'm
Speaker 2: going to start my cults. Thank you for calling, Evan.
Speaker 2: I appreciate it, man, of course, I have a great night.
Speaker 1: Gek you doo? Hello? Oh Geka?
Speaker 2: Who is this?
Speaker 1: Hey? Hi, this is Alexander. You Mike you might know
Speaker 1: be as lex though. What's going on?
Speaker 4: Alexander?
Speaker 2: Oh? Ship?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: It says here that it says here, Alex from Chicago
Speaker 2: went to high school with you. We didn't go to
Speaker 2: high school together, but we we.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no no. Your call screener got that incorrect.
Speaker 4: Let me, well, I know what, I went high school
Speaker 4: with met you through hence we almost made that Watermelon
Speaker 4: time travel movie together.
Speaker 1: But that's a whole other thing.
Speaker 2: Yes, one of my one of my best friends of
Speaker 2: all time went to a high school in Baltimore where
Speaker 2: and you went to that high school?
Speaker 1: And we yes, very good man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, how are you doing?
Speaker 1: Man?
Speaker 2: Has it been?
Speaker 1: Yeah? It's kind of fucking a roller coaster.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 4: I'm actually doing pretty decent right now. I'm actually life updates.
Speaker 4: I do kind of want to get to the story
Speaker 4: I gotta tell you about Life Updates is I'm currently
Speaker 4: in an outpatient rehab program. I'm currently working for my
Speaker 4: best entrants on sobriety's sake, which I've been I don't know,
Speaker 4: off a couple of times over the years, but this
Speaker 4: is kind of the most serious I've taken it in
Speaker 4: the darker news of things going on in my life.
Speaker 4: But mentally I'm doing pretty great and kind of like
Speaker 4: a upswing, but not as bad as it could be.
Speaker 4: I'm just people don't know too. I'm talking to you, like,
Speaker 4: do you know me. I'm a bipolar one diagnosed.
Speaker 1: I do do real therapy and all that.
Speaker 4: Not to undermine you get but I do do all
Speaker 4: the me.
Speaker 2: I am not a real therapist, dude.
Speaker 4: I've been getting like as much help from you at
Speaker 4: this point as my real therapist I used to have.
Speaker 1: I've filmed your.
Speaker 4: Show, not for like I've seen you put us some
Speaker 4: clips like back in the day.
Speaker 1: If you're doing this, uh, get up.
Speaker 4: But I was working at Concierge Downtown at a place
Speaker 4: called Block thirty seven in Chicago, and I was just
Speaker 4: bored as shit, like on this computer for like eight
Speaker 4: hour shifts and I just fuck around like on Reddit
Speaker 4: sometimes and I open read it one day and You're
Speaker 4: just like the top of the fucking page and I'm like,
Speaker 4: I know that.
Speaker 1: Get go. That's fucking lyle no way.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've been watching longtime watchers since like COVID times
Speaker 4: or beginning of COVID times, and yeah, like third time
Speaker 4: caller finally getting through.
Speaker 2: That's fucking awesome, man, that's cool. I remember I remember
Speaker 2: when we were in high school. I was really excited
Speaker 2: to meet you because you were another guy who I was.
Speaker 2: I you know, I made movies in high school, and
Speaker 2: I made movies with my friends. But I think my
Speaker 2: friends at the time, like they they they loved helping
Speaker 2: out with the movies, but I don't think any of
Speaker 2: them like wanted to like like on their own, like
Speaker 2: pursue being a a filmmaker or anything.
Speaker 4: Yeah, on the fucking money with your like as far
Speaker 4: as sketch comedy goes next to like whitest Kids and
Speaker 4: like what a couple of my face, like you know,
Speaker 4: Jordan Peele and fucking like Chappelle show and shit, as
Speaker 4: far as like independent stuff that I was coming from,
Speaker 4: like my hometown, Like the gifts that you all were
Speaker 4: doing were like my favorite things, especially.
Speaker 1: Like the end of high school.
Speaker 2: Man, well thanks, man, I was gonna say I was.
Speaker 2: I was excited to meet you at the time because
Speaker 2: you were another guy who wanted to make who wanted
Speaker 2: to make films, and I feel like I had a
Speaker 2: lot of dudes like that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, man, no, totally, I was pursuing it semi seriously
Speaker 4: at the time. I've done a bunch of like weird
Speaker 4: kind of crazy.
Speaker 1: Shit in middle school. It's a movie called like None
Speaker 1: with a Gun and.
Speaker 4: Some horror movie called Silent but Deadly, and a whole
Speaker 4: bunch of like goofy shit that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. People were like pretty.
Speaker 4: Impressed that a fucking kid could do, even though I
Speaker 4: felt like I was just fucking around. So I decided
Speaker 4: to go to that magnet Art high school for it.
Speaker 4: And that's when I became pretentious and thought like, oh,
Speaker 4: I could consume at cooperg and like all this shit,
Speaker 4: but you know, Garden some like decent work. But I
Speaker 4: don't know, I look back at who I was in
Speaker 4: like high school, and even though I.
Speaker 1: Did a bunch of fun ship, I definitely looked back
Speaker 1: at like who I wasn't an artist back then.
Speaker 4: Is just like damn, I can't believe I was so
Speaker 4: high on myself because you know, I was just a kid, like.
Speaker 1: I was doing cool things. But if you had asked me,
Speaker 1: I would have been like, I'm the greatest.
Speaker 4: But I don't know, that's a bipolars mentality whatever.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, I mean I I was too in high school.
Speaker 2: I went my I think you know, my friends and
Speaker 2: I we thought we were like the funniest guys, and
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 4: That I would confirm that too, though not to kiss
Speaker 4: your ass, but I appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Or but it's not well, it's funny because the whole
Speaker 2: idea of, like I guess, with art and making things
Speaker 2: in general, there's a there's a there's a line you
Speaker 2: have to walk, right, because I think to make good
Speaker 2: stuff you have to you have to really believe in
Speaker 2: yourself and really believe that what you're doing is good
Speaker 2: enough to exist for like just to propel you to
Speaker 2: make it. But then also not line of like you know,
Speaker 2: being you know, getting getting too high on yourself.
Speaker 4: Yes, absolutely true, But that was the thing, like I
Speaker 4: had bought into all the you know, there's every celebrity
Speaker 4: in their mother has a video out there that's like
Speaker 4: believe in you and the.
Speaker 1: Rest will follow type shit. And I saw all of
Speaker 1: those when I was like a kid. So by the
Speaker 1: time that I did.
Speaker 4: Get to, like, you know, the point where I was
Speaker 4: making work where I was like recognized at least by
Speaker 4: the state for it, I was like, oh, fuck it,
Speaker 4: the world is my oyster. I gotta believe that I'm
Speaker 4: the best there is.
Speaker 1: Or ytta YadA.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I don't know, I came out to Chicago,
Speaker 4: and then I realized a lot more like leaving hometown,
Speaker 4: that it's really not all about you, which is like
Speaker 4: obviously a big thing for life, but I mean it's not.
Speaker 1: And you go out to a place that you're.
Speaker 4: Unfamiliar with, you kind of like accept the fact that
Speaker 4: you are a tourist in another place. You're not like
Speaker 4: settled with this hometown that you fuck around with for
Speaker 4: eighteen years, like I was in Baltimore, and you kind
Speaker 4: of realize the things are a lot bigger than you.
Speaker 4: And I've been like very i think selflessly pursuing that
Speaker 4: for the last step in years. But to kind of
Speaker 4: seguey to my story, and then I'm like at a crossroads.
Speaker 4: I'm probably in June, gonna head back to Baltimore at
Speaker 4: least temporarily, and then continue on with the next place.
Speaker 1: I think Chicago's wraps, So why why.
Speaker 2: Are you at a crossroads?
Speaker 4: Are?
Speaker 2: What are the two roads? I want is coming back
Speaker 2: to Baltimore and what's the other one?
Speaker 4: The other one is just kind of like I don't know.
Speaker 4: I've been a part of this band for like seven years,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, I don't know, it's someone else's band,
Speaker 4: but I definitely am like as far as like you
Speaker 4: ever seen Social Network, you know that movie, the Facebook movie?
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course.
Speaker 1: If there's an Edward.
Speaker 4: Saverign like character in this is this band, then I'm
Speaker 4: definitely the one that's like, sorry, my fuck you flip
Speaker 4: flopster at the what's it called? Like, I got some
Speaker 4: sort of like to being here because I've been around
Speaker 4: so long, but I don't care. It's those other kids
Speaker 4: fucking bad. I've just been a part of it since.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, so you're you're getting you're getting sucked out
Speaker 2: of your.
Speaker 1: Band a sort of I'm sucking myself in a way.
Speaker 4: That's why I can't sucking myself, but I get sucked
Speaker 4: a little bit.
Speaker 1: It's more dramatic than the fucking I don't know that
Speaker 1: that the Zuckerberg guy though, I don't think he ever
Speaker 1: got shot at And that's kind of the thing.
Speaker 7: Man.
Speaker 1: Chicago is a very violent place. I don't know, it's
Speaker 1: been dealing with it for a while, but it just
Speaker 1: kind of.
Speaker 2: So, your your bandmate tried to shoot you.
Speaker 1: Let me clarify for the record's sake, because one we're
Speaker 1: keeping gro anonymous. We can look back.
Speaker 4: At this later as a haha ha, very funny. But
Speaker 4: this is a thing that happened kind of an ongoing
Speaker 4: thing that I'm still going to be like, all right,
Speaker 4: I'll describe in detail, but only vaguely.
Speaker 1: All So, let's just do the day.
Speaker 4: Of this thing happening, because I will say yes, but
Speaker 4: let me explain the day that this happened. I was
Speaker 4: about a couple of weeks deep into coming off my
Speaker 4: last job, so I was kind of in this place
Speaker 4: where it's like, you know, what's the bullshit that I need?
Speaker 1: What do I don't need? What can I sell? What
Speaker 1: I make money off of?
Speaker 4: Just so I got some groundwork that I can move
Speaker 4: on top of. Besides that, just trying to make money
Speaker 4: independently for a second. So one of the things that
Speaker 4: I had was this weed pen that it was like
Speaker 4: one hundred twenty dollars. I used to work with head
Speaker 4: shop called the Other Side in the House, and I
Speaker 4: gotta look like one hundred twenty dollars there. It's a
Speaker 4: nice little like pen battery, and somebody offered to buy
Speaker 4: it for me for like sixty dollars, So I'm like,
Speaker 4: fucking cool.
Speaker 1: I could totally use six dollars right now.
Speaker 4: I don't even smoke weed like that, so well, I
Speaker 4: don't smoke pens like that, so I can totally sell
Speaker 4: this thing.
Speaker 1: It's fine.
Speaker 4: But the problem was my roommate was using it at
Speaker 4: the time, and it was like eight o'clock and I
Speaker 4: like eight in the morning, and I had to leave
Speaker 4: and he was asleep, and I was just like, oh,
Speaker 4: fuck it. Oh two very important point of the story too.
Speaker 4: It's not just one roommate. It's well, we're talking about
Speaker 4: the one guy, but he.
Speaker 1: Is a girlfriend too, who's also another roomate. So it's
Speaker 1: a whole cup of situation.
Speaker 4: So I go and I knock in this couple's door
Speaker 4: and I'm like, yo, I'm sorry, but I got to
Speaker 4: get that pen back because I got to sell it.
Speaker 4: And I just hear like oh, And so I'm doing
Speaker 4: my thing, get my things together for like twenty minutes
Speaker 4: or so. I go back and nobody's there at the door,
Speaker 4: so knock again. I'm like, yo, I got to head out,
Speaker 4: and they're like, just let us sleep, and I'm like, yo,
Speaker 4: fucking I didn't say, like why, but I'm like I
Speaker 4: really need this now, please let me go and they didn't.
Speaker 4: They didn't open the door, and they didn't give me
Speaker 4: the thing, and I was like, fuck it, I gotta go.
Speaker 1: So I did.
Speaker 4: I left, and I didn't make the sixty dollars. I
Speaker 4: made a little bit more money, but I didn't make
Speaker 4: as much as I could have. So I go back
Speaker 4: home and I'm fucking pissed, and no kids are up
Speaker 4: at this point, and I'm just like, basically just like,
Speaker 4: don't talk to me, like you all kind of ruined
Speaker 4: that for the day. You've lost me money today, and y'all.
Speaker 4: I'm already kind of on bullshit with y'all because Rent
Speaker 4: and a whole bunch of other dumb ships who just
Speaker 4: don't talk to me today.
Speaker 1: Just give it a day.
Speaker 4: Maybe we can talk about it later, but today, just don't.
Speaker 4: Like thirty minutes go by and I hear motherfuckers like
Speaker 4: Snake saying something in their room, like.
Speaker 1: Thoughting each other. This is what they do too. There's
Speaker 1: a couple things like they definitely group together when they're like,
Speaker 1: all right, we're in trouble.
Speaker 2: You're you're living in that. I'm I'm sorry if I'm
Speaker 2: a bad listener for this, but so you're you're living
Speaker 2: in the house with with with this this guy and
Speaker 2: his girlfriends.
Speaker 4: Mm hmm yeah, and enough kids in there too, but
Speaker 4: he wasn't a home and.
Speaker 2: Then and then so there's some tensions going on with
Speaker 2: this this this vate pen that they didn't give you,
Speaker 2: and now they're kind of conniving in one corner and
Speaker 2: things are boiling up. And how did this escalate to
Speaker 2: the point where you know, by the way, just I
Speaker 2: just wanted to let you know, man, if you if
Speaker 2: you feel like you shouldn't tell this story for whatever
Speaker 2: legal reasons, it's you.
Speaker 4: If there's a platform that I can tell it on,
Speaker 4: it's definitely the Get Show.
Speaker 1: I just feel like this is definitely gonna be all right.
Speaker 2: I just wanted to give you that a second to
Speaker 2: think about it, but go ahead.
Speaker 4: No, definitely, I think that I can't tell the story.
Speaker 4: This has happened like two weeks or two or three
Speaker 4: weeks ago.
Speaker 1: Now I definitely thought about it clear enough to.
Speaker 2: Think just okay, So so just so, so tell me
Speaker 2: if we could like go to the because I want
Speaker 2: to hear more about about you and I want to
Speaker 2: make sure we have enough time to you know, get
Speaker 2: what can you can we where how did it escalate?
Speaker 7: All right?
Speaker 4: So basically, like after they group together, the girlfriend comes
Speaker 4: out to me and she has this like wheetend it's
Speaker 4: like an ozone pen.
Speaker 1: Anybody smokes wheet tens know this like little gray disposable pen.
Speaker 4: And she's like, I found this is mine and I
Speaker 4: found it the other day in your room completely empty.
Speaker 4: What do you have to say on some shit like that?
Speaker 4: And just like a million things went through my mom
Speaker 4: but the very first thing that went through my mind was,
Speaker 4: holy shit, you went my fucking room. Like I keep
Speaker 4: my door lock. You went inside of my room like
Speaker 4: I understood, Like I understood too, Like okay, you're finding
Speaker 4: a thing that is like you think it's yours. I
Speaker 4: get in my moavies, but you went in my room.
Speaker 4: That's like just where I drew the line. And I
Speaker 4: was like, you went my fucking room.
Speaker 1: No way. So basically, long story short, me and her
Speaker 1: are well. First of all, let me explain.
Speaker 4: I also told her too, before she even came to
Speaker 4: me about this, I was like, I fucking told you.
Speaker 4: I can't don't feel like I can talk about this
Speaker 4: to day. I really late that as Bessa could. I'm like,
Speaker 4: are you sure you want to talk about this, and
Speaker 4: she still did. So we're arguing about this fucking pen
Speaker 4: for no reason, and I don't know she's going down
Speaker 4: the hall She goes down the hallway. I'm on the
Speaker 4: my side of the hallway, so kind of a distance
Speaker 4: between each other. But at the end of the argument,
Speaker 4: I realized that she was just talking in circles.
Speaker 1: I was just like, whatever, So I fucking tossed the
Speaker 1: pen at her feet.
Speaker 4: I basically tossed it back down the hallway and tossed
Speaker 4: it at her feet, basically in my head, being like
Speaker 4: the same way that I throw a fucking dog a bone,
Speaker 4: because the fucking word went through my head. There's a
Speaker 4: fucking appropriate to it that I don't like. Can't be
Speaker 4: one of my fucking room. Oh my god, But yeah,
Speaker 4: I fucking threw this.
Speaker 2: And then she goes, so, how did how did how
Speaker 2: did a gun get involved?
Speaker 4: That's what we're getting to the good, juicy stuff in
Speaker 4: the next five seconds.
Speaker 1: So I throw the fan at her feet.
Speaker 4: She goes, did you just throw a fucking pen at me?
Speaker 4: Her boyfriend's not in the room, but that's enough for
Speaker 4: him to hear that and then come out.
Speaker 1: Ah way did you just throw a pen of me?
Speaker 1: So he comes out, he's running walking towards me.
Speaker 4: No one keeps seven years, but I just see this
Speaker 4: looking at other I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, this guy's gonna beat the ship out of me.
Speaker 4: And I'm just like, well, you know what, he's talking
Speaker 4: about it so much for seven years, I'm just gonna
Speaker 4: win him have it, because honestly I'm interested.
Speaker 1: I want to see how hard this he can hit.
Speaker 4: So he comes up to me, He doesn't exactly what
Speaker 4: I think, well a little bit more.
Speaker 1: He picks me up. He slams me on his.
Speaker 4: Music setup, which I'm too just like my pianos in
Speaker 4: the corner. You could have broken my piano, but you
Speaker 4: slam me on your music setup.
Speaker 1: What the fuck?
Speaker 4: And then I'm on his music setup just blow blow, blow,
Speaker 4: like in the face, over and over and over again.
Speaker 4: And he kind of stops, and I'm just like again
Speaker 4: because I'm like still talking, I really still talking, like
Speaker 4: again wow wow again bow, And I'm just trying to
Speaker 4: lean into it, but he's not fucking leaning into the
Speaker 4: point where I'm like, dude, who can beat up like
Speaker 4: so much worse than this, Like it's so so boring
Speaker 4: if this is really what you've been threatening me with
Speaker 4: the whole time. And so this happens, and it gets
Speaker 4: to the point too where he's like finally refuses to
Speaker 4: like beat the shit out of me because I just
Speaker 4: keep saying again like a fucking crazy person, like I
Speaker 4: don't know someone wh's saying fight club too many times,
Speaker 4: but fucking man, I just he finally stops. He's like,
Speaker 4: this dude must be crazy. He just keeps wanting me
Speaker 4: to punch him, and then he starts, and then I
Speaker 4: go start going off like.
Speaker 1: Oh you hit Michael, bitch, you got no just.
Speaker 4: Going off in this fucking kid for like no reason.
Speaker 4: I won't shut the fuck up because, like I said
Speaker 4: to Bipolar, when provoked, man I will fucking like go off,
Speaker 4: especially person to say, but I just wouldn't.
Speaker 1: Shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4: And the other point he was like he shut his
Speaker 4: door behind him in his room, door was shut. I
Speaker 4: was still talking shit and he comes out one off
Speaker 4: on the floor and that just shut everybody up. And
Speaker 4: then it was just like I don't know, I didn't
Speaker 4: flinch nothing, like I just had experience in Baltimore.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna go XIX.
Speaker 2: Let me let me, let me, let me cut off,
Speaker 2: let me, let me let me Okay, so you had
Speaker 2: this this pretty wild roommate encounter that you know, I did.
Speaker 2: You were you were egging on a little bit, and
Speaker 2: you were also dealing with your own mental health problems
Speaker 2: at the same time, and it just sounds like a
Speaker 2: crazy fucking mess. So just like I guess kind of,
Speaker 2: you know, I want to make sure we get to
Speaker 2: this before we go like you're so you're doing better now.
Speaker 2: I want to know the arc because you getting beaten
Speaker 2: up on your roommate's music studio and asking him to
Speaker 2: keep hitting you does sound like a low points and
Speaker 2: so I'm happy to hear that. As we're talking in
Speaker 2: current day, you you you're feeling better, and you're you're
Speaker 2: feeling at a at a higher point than then, and
Speaker 2: I don't want to know.
Speaker 1: And also checked out and you know, not to undermine
Speaker 1: you again, but actual like therapists and psychiatrists and like
Speaker 1: doctors and stuff, they're like, you're getting and I had
Speaker 1: to check too. I was like, man, how crazy am I?
Speaker 1: Everybody's I took a couple of weeks. Everybody says that
Speaker 1: I'm chilling. So I'm here talking to gek.
Speaker 2: Now, Okay, so how do you how do you feel
Speaker 2: like you got there?
Speaker 4: Well, to the point in the well, it's back up
Speaker 4: a month. This motherfucker gets a gun in general, and
Speaker 4: I guess it's a couple of months ago, but it
Speaker 4: was to one point where you know, we lived together,
Speaker 4: we've lived to get me and this person lived together
Speaker 4: for basically like seven years. It's to the point with
Speaker 4: this place where it's just like the rent is just
Speaker 4: so like on time.
Speaker 2: All hold on, I guess let me stop going quick.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about you and your personal journey because again,
Speaker 2: it felt it seems as though when you were in
Speaker 2: that encounter, you were yelling and you were you feel
Speaker 2: like you sounds like you were not in a good place.
Speaker 2: And as we're talking now, you feel like you are
Speaker 2: in a good place. And I just want to know,
Speaker 2: you know, from then to now what you feel like
Speaker 2: is improved and how you feel like you got there?
Speaker 1: Oh? Yes, absolutely, man, Sorry that I was going right
Speaker 1: in the darkest.
Speaker 4: No literally, I think that the best thing that I
Speaker 4: could have done for myself, and the thing was too
Speaker 4: I gave myself like twenty four hours on it, so
Speaker 4: I know how to at least in a roommate situation,
Speaker 4: like I can stay in my room for the most
Speaker 4: where I can avoid people. We can probably just even
Speaker 4: if a dramatic situation has I was basically way too
Speaker 4: dramatic for some people, but at least for me, when
Speaker 4: dramatic situations happen, for the most part, you can take
Speaker 4: a back seat. The problem was I took a back
Speaker 4: seat for twenty four hours and was still pissed off
Speaker 4: to the point where I'm like, I need someone to
Speaker 4: like check me for sure and make sure I'm good.
Speaker 4: So I didn't responsibly do when I'm in crisis, and
Speaker 4: I went to an inpatient that I knew they had
Speaker 4: all my information, and.
Speaker 1: I did a nice little seventy two hour stay just
Speaker 1: to talk to.
Speaker 4: Some professionals make sure that they could check off that
Speaker 4: I was okay like I thought I was. They did,
Speaker 4: and then through them too, I decided to start doing
Speaker 4: this outpatient rehabilitation center too, where I could focus more
Speaker 4: on myself and my surprise.
Speaker 2: Good, good, good, Are you are you sober right now?
Speaker 1: Am I?
Speaker 4: Literally just I just an hour before us getting on
Speaker 4: the phone, man smoked my last joint, or officially my
Speaker 4: last week that I have on me. This next week
Speaker 4: is going to kind of be a test to be like,
Speaker 4: can I just survive off the cigarette?
Speaker 2: What's the what's the big what's the big one? What's
Speaker 2: the big one for you? Is it pod? Is it alcohol?
Speaker 1: Is it?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: Word?
Speaker 4: The worst thing for me is just And this is
Speaker 4: where I totally like New Year's. I mean, I'm just
Speaker 4: at a decent point here in Chicago where I can
Speaker 4: just hang in and hanging out with these rich kids
Speaker 4: at like New Year's parties, and there's just molly and
Speaker 4: cocaine and all the other like upper shit that's regularly
Speaker 4: available and for free, and it's all like the yeah,
Speaker 4: just upper like bandmate press bullshit, and and.
Speaker 2: How how how how sober are you from from that stuff?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 4: Man? Yeah, I would say a couple of months now, well,
Speaker 4: actually not months.
Speaker 1: I'm over jumping myself. It is February.
Speaker 4: But since a couple of days after New Years, I
Speaker 4: got to a point independently where I was like, these
Speaker 4: things are definitely like I don't know, I was talking
Speaker 4: around with them when I was a teenager. I started
Speaker 4: sucking around with them again when I was twenty five,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, there's the reason I to stop when
Speaker 4: I was a teenager.
Speaker 2: So so so so lex Man, I suppose like, oh,
Speaker 2: I want to know from you before we go. Uh,
Speaker 2: I'm glad to hear that you're doing better. I'm glad
Speaker 2: to hear that I'm your you're beginning to it sounds
Speaker 2: like walk down a good path and you know you're
Speaker 2: going to a real therapist and getting off the you know,
Speaker 2: the hard stuff. Actually, what what do you hope for
Speaker 2: the future?
Speaker 1: Man? Man?
Speaker 4: I gotta man And this is the thing too, And
Speaker 4: I've really done some fucking cool things here in the
Speaker 4: last seven years.
Speaker 1: I hope to show you personally some time at.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I'm starting to release, at least the music side.
Speaker 4: I've been doing all types of art, but the music
Speaker 4: side of this stuff is coming throughout twenty twenty three
Speaker 4: in a pretty expansive form. But also I haven't dropped
Speaker 4: really anything since before COVID, so tons of music rolling out.
Speaker 8: I got a June or yeah, I remember or film
Speaker 8: interrupting you, but I remember I think either I saw you,
Speaker 8: or maybe our mutual friend saw you and.
Speaker 2: Or or maybe he shared with me some music and
Speaker 2: I remember I heard it. It must have been high school
Speaker 2: of college of being like this, shit's fucking hard as hell.
Speaker 2: This is great.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 4: If I can really quick plug myself on your show,
Speaker 4: my account.
Speaker 1: Is on all platforms.
Speaker 2: Well listen when you're in When next time you're back
Speaker 2: in Baltimore and I'm back in Baltimore, I'm coming to
Speaker 2: the Auto Let me know if you want to come
Speaker 2: and coming to the Auto bar. Uh fucking later this
Speaker 2: year to do my GETO thing.
Speaker 1: Yes, sir, isn't that in That's in April? Right? I thought.
Speaker 2: It in September.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no wait wait Baltimore is in good You've
Speaker 1: got an April show in Chicago though, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I see I'm doing one in Chicago.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Also, I should say, unless things getting super dramatic, I
Speaker 1: should still be here.
Speaker 2: Don't stay in Chicago for the sole purpose of coming
Speaker 2: to my live show.
Speaker 1: I'll say that I am not lyle trust me, it's not.
Speaker 1: I love you man, but it's definitely not just go
Speaker 1: to the GEK show. But I hope that I can
Speaker 1: go to the GET show.
Speaker 5: It'll be great.
Speaker 1: I will definitely be like Chicago Get Show or the
Speaker 1: Baltimore Get Show. At least you.
Speaker 2: Want to good. Good of the show. Good good catching
Speaker 2: up with you man, hit me up on we follow
Speaker 2: each other on the computer. Man, hit me up. I'd
Speaker 2: love to talk again. All right, that's you want to say.
Speaker 4: To the I shouldn't have plugged my Instagram account because
Speaker 4: now people can put this story together if they want
Speaker 4: to figure out. Oh whatever, fuck them, dude, Lyle. It
Speaker 4: was very catching up with YouTube man.
Speaker 2: Hey, YouTube man, you take care, I take care, buddy
Speaker 2: letter Man.
Speaker 8: Good.
Speaker 2: This good. It's always good catching up with old friends.
Speaker 2: I'm glad he's doing well.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Lex was a friend of mine in in high school
Speaker 2: and he was always doing cool creative stuff. It's cool that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he's watching the stream the shows. You know, it's tweirt.
Speaker 2: I feel a weird uh kind of connection to a
Speaker 2: lot of folks from from from my past through this
Speaker 2: thing because I get like d ms and comments or
Speaker 2: whatever from from folks I went to high school with,
Speaker 2: or you know, anything like that. And it's good. It's
Speaker 2: good to keep connections to all phases of your life.
Speaker 3: There Ben goes on the line, taking your phone calls
Speaker 3: every night.
Speaker 2: There, Repin goes through on his eight who's teaching you
Speaker 2: cud in the mind of your life, but he's not
Speaker 2: really an expert