Speaker 1: Yes, I'm in the middle of it, of it, or
Speaker 1: I've gone through it, or I'm on my third round
Speaker 1: and be like, that's it. That's where you get the
Speaker 1: magic juiciness because you're feeling the ship that you've kind
Speaker 1: of too much. Do y'all know, do y'all? Let me
Speaker 1: tell y'all. Do y'all know? Ten years into intentional journey
Speaker 1: and healing trauma, last year, I just found out that
Speaker 1: I had a mother wound.
Speaker 2: Welcome back to Good MoMA's Bad Choices. I'm Erica. Happy
Speaker 2: Wednesday Tribe. How you're doing? Happy Wednesday Day? I'm feeling good. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you look cute. We got the green boots on.
Speaker 3: You know, I really love these boots. I only want
Speaker 3: on a handful of times. I'm always trying to find
Speaker 3: like reasons to I.
Speaker 2: Don't think you need a reason. I think it's I
Speaker 2: think they just they're they're in all the time type
Speaker 2: of boot they are.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 3: If you guys notice, I'm a boot bitch. I love
Speaker 3: a good boot, a cowboy boot, any boot.
Speaker 4: I love it.
Speaker 2: And if you haven't subscribed to our YouTube channel, you
Speaker 2: should definitely do that. We sometimes we do what is it?
Speaker 2: What does the drip check, the drip check? We do
Speaker 2: the drip check today? Should we do a drip check?
Speaker 2: The drip check? So we have Jamila here in a
Speaker 2: satin short set. If you're watching YouTube, she just gave
Speaker 2: us a little sexy little dance. Oh yes, she's tiny,
Speaker 2: but she's thick as fuck. Okay. And then she has
Speaker 2: on the green cowprint boots, slight lime neon green color.
Speaker 2: And oh look at that fat Wow wow wow. I
Speaker 2: don't know what any of these designers are so like
Speaker 2: they are They are unknown, but very very expensive.
Speaker 4: They are probably China.
Speaker 5: They are Italian leather, Italian from the from the factories
Speaker 5: of China, silks, maybe Paliesta, slightly leopard print.
Speaker 3: And these are from my favorite Steve Madden, the Fashions
Speaker 3: of the high End of Stephen.
Speaker 4: What's it like that?
Speaker 2: Stephen mad Stephen Madden mad Madame? It's this.
Speaker 4: It's a French Stephen Stephen ma.
Speaker 2: Name is Stepte.
Speaker 3: Oh these oh, these are from Steffan Modern. Who Stefan Modern?
Speaker 3: Oh you know, you wouldn't know. It's very exclusive, very
Speaker 3: very foreign, very exclusive. You wouldn't know anything.
Speaker 4: These are from These are from a unicorn.
Speaker 3: Actually, this is this is a unicorn cow of green.
Speaker 3: You wouldn't know anything about it because it's Italian. It's
Speaker 3: a green unicorn cow.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 4: And my, my, my.
Speaker 3: Dear wife here she is wearing are those spice shiny spanex.
Speaker 3: It's a shiny spandex and she's going shiny spanex with
Speaker 3: a hinted glitter. It's formal but it's comfortable. It's formal
Speaker 3: but it's comfortable. Her shoulders are sparkling and also they
Speaker 3: have shoulder pads.
Speaker 4: She's being like modern but retro.
Speaker 2: Girl.
Speaker 3: And she's of course with Doc Martin's. Doc Martin would
Speaker 3: love a sponsorship.
Speaker 2: I would because I'm.
Speaker 3: Like a badass, but because jam So if you have
Speaker 3: missed the YouTube, now's the time to check in.
Speaker 2: Wow, everyone really needed that anyway. Anyway, I'm really excited
Speaker 2: to introduce our guest today. We have been uh stalking
Speaker 2: you for a bit via Spotify, using all of your
Speaker 2: amazing music to inspire daily nightly. You actually came to
Speaker 2: us through the tribe, so I'm always excited when we
Speaker 2: get a guest on that is literally passed on through
Speaker 2: the community. Shout out to Latiana. She actually joined us
Speaker 2: on our Costa Rica good Vibra treat last year and
Speaker 2: she shared shared you with me. So I'm just really
Speaker 2: excited to invite to the show Tony Jones. She is
Speaker 2: an affirmation musician and just blessing the world with self love.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's an honor to be here, seeing you guys
Speaker 1: on Instagram, hearing you guys talk about all the things.
Speaker 1: It's just really beautiful to be here. So thank you
Speaker 1: for sharing who I am and what I do in
Speaker 1: the world with your platform.
Speaker 4: Yes, you're super grateful.
Speaker 3: I was just telling her before, when you're in the
Speaker 3: other room that somebody else who I'm in school with,
Speaker 3: it's also part of our tribe.
Speaker 4: She told me. It was like, oh yeah, and if
Speaker 4: you're Tony Jones, you don't know who that is.
Speaker 3: And I was like, and I looked you up, so
Speaker 3: it's like, you know, yes, yeah, the circles are close.
Speaker 4: Yes, we're attracting all the witchy women and I love it.
Speaker 1: Yes, when I saw you guys, I was like, oh, Sis,
Speaker 1: what up? See you soon, see you soon?
Speaker 3: Right, So it really be like that, like, oh, sure
Speaker 3: we know three people who might know each other.
Speaker 4: I'll see you soon. Like I don't have to worry
Speaker 4: it's like I want you and I and I will
Speaker 4: see you. Every time I do it, it always happens.
Speaker 1: I was like, yep, I knew it, and.
Speaker 4: It's so funny.
Speaker 3: We had a guest here before you and we're like, oh,
Speaker 3: so and SO is coming. She's like, oh, maybe i'll
Speaker 3: hang out and wait and huger.
Speaker 2: I was like, okay. You know what I was also
Speaker 2: thinking too, is that so many people find us through
Speaker 2: audio and listening to your voice through audio. I had
Speaker 2: no idea what you look like until maybe like a
Speaker 2: few days ago, to be honest, no, I know. So
Speaker 2: I went on your Instagram and I was like, wow,
Speaker 2: it's so interesting, like hearing person's voice and then attaching
Speaker 2: like I really didn't. I didn't really put a lot
Speaker 2: of I didn't know what to imagine. I knew that
Speaker 2: you had to be this beautiful woman because you have
Speaker 2: this beautiful voice and this beautiful energy that that radiates
Speaker 2: through year music.
Speaker 1: I get it from my mom.
Speaker 2: But yeah, and I would imagine that sometimes that's how
Speaker 2: people feel when they listen to the podcast, Like I
Speaker 2: think people have literally heard our voices in passing and
Speaker 2: be like you could Mom's bad choices like I've never
Speaker 2: seen you before. I just heard your voice and it
Speaker 2: sounds familiar, and I'm like, wow, that's so crazy.
Speaker 3: That yeah, that happened to me in a public bathroom stall.
Speaker 3: I was like talking to someone and they're like, do
Speaker 3: you have a podcast?
Speaker 2: I was like, I do, Like interesting, I'm like a
Speaker 2: radio personality, but not so tony. Can you tell us
Speaker 2: and share with us? You're like, just a little bit
Speaker 2: about you, like how did you? Where are you from?
Speaker 1: From the d Yeah, I was a live coach for
Speaker 1: six seven years, you know, helping young people in Detroit
Speaker 1: public high schools and coaching women how to heal from workoholism.
Speaker 4: Oh wow.
Speaker 1: I started that twenty twenty fourteen, twenty fifteen, and I
Speaker 1: started these messages when it was like you know, getting
Speaker 1: your bag, your bad bitch, you know, team no sleep,
Speaker 1: you know. So I was very My message was very
Speaker 1: counter culture because I was like hell from workholism, self love,
Speaker 1: mental health. So it was a minute before it started
Speaker 1: to like, you know, spill over into the culture. And
Speaker 1: so as a life coach, I found myself like burning out.
Speaker 1: You know. I saw a lot of my clients and
Speaker 1: audience benefit from the depletion of me, and I was like, man, God,
Speaker 1: you gotta give me something that's going to help you know,
Speaker 1: my clients and the women practice well being on to
Speaker 1: go and through literally through prayameditation, I got the idea
Speaker 1: of affirmation music and I was like, ooh, let me
Speaker 1: google that. And so when I googled it, I didn't
Speaker 1: find anything that coined affirmation music. I was like, what,
Speaker 1: I get to do this, and so I went to
Speaker 1: I actually came to LA four month and this was
Speaker 1: years ago, well twenty eighteen, and I took all my journals,
Speaker 1: all my notes from retreats, you know, workshops that I've
Speaker 1: been to, and even personal writings you know, and came
Speaker 1: to LA and wrote Affirmations for the Girl and Ask
Speaker 1: a Woman, you know, which is nine songs that I wanted.
Speaker 1: This was the trick because I was like, I want
Speaker 1: these nine songs to represent the nine months it takes
Speaker 1: a woman to grow a child. So as soon as
Speaker 1: they pushed play no, there's like no going back. You
Speaker 1: immediately start growing the woman of your dreams. And so
Speaker 1: I was like, this is going to help my coaching business.
Speaker 1: I'm going to be a successful life coach. Yo. I
Speaker 1: released that album and Women's hit during Women's History Month three,
Speaker 1: nineteen nineteen, and I released that album two weeks later,
Speaker 1: All Hell broke, lose, my life completely changed, lost my job, house,
Speaker 1: all type of stuff, house broken, just all it was
Speaker 1: just crazy. And then I think like a year later,
Speaker 1: I decided, you know what, I need to become an
Speaker 1: afrom I think there's something here with this because I
Speaker 1: was like this the first time I created something without
Speaker 1: a doubt and so and it was like the I
Speaker 1: was getting some coins. So that's kind of like the
Speaker 1: backdrop of like how I got into this like this.
Speaker 1: I never had you know, becoming a musician on my
Speaker 1: vision board, no shit like that. It was never into
Speaker 1: I wasn't never saw myself as an artist, so it
Speaker 1: was all surprised. So it was like, you know, being
Speaker 1: an ambitious woman and being a nerd, you know, logic
Speaker 1: and things like that. I was just like, Wow, there's
Speaker 1: dreams happening that I didn't plan, that I didn't strategically
Speaker 1: put intention behind.
Speaker 2: Well, I think, wow, I mean that's I relate to
Speaker 2: that so much because I think when you don't have expectation,
Speaker 2: it removes the fear. Yeah, you know, and I think
Speaker 2: that speaks to like me and Jamila's business here. It's
Speaker 2: like we started this shit low key by accident. It
Speaker 2: was not with it, but but for some reason, like
Speaker 2: it was the first thing we created or I created.
Speaker 2: And I think Mila too can speak to this without doubt. Yeah,
Speaker 2: without a lot of doubt.
Speaker 1: Fun, Yeah, there wasn't.
Speaker 2: There wasn't.
Speaker 3: Don't put all this pressure on yourself to like perform
Speaker 3: or like to like hit this, like hit any any point.
Speaker 4: Yes, Like let's put this out. I feel good about this.
Speaker 1: Yes, And that made me feel like, Okay, how much
Speaker 1: more can I unplan my life?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Let's see what kind of magic happens when I unplan it.
Speaker 1: Let me take some stuff off and leave more space.
Speaker 1: So in between then and now, I mean, it's been
Speaker 1: a few fuck boys, you know, situationships, distractions, and through
Speaker 1: every one of them, they've been initiations into the highest,
Speaker 1: highest version of me as a woman. And I'm grateful
Speaker 1: for all those experiences. You know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that's so like, that's so true.
Speaker 3: Like I think we have such a strong grip on
Speaker 3: like the what we want to happen, and sometimes it's
Speaker 3: really in like uh, maybe having an aspiration but releasing
Speaker 3: the how or like exactly how it looks, you know,
Speaker 3: like you wanted to help people. You wanted to be
Speaker 3: a life coach, and essentially that's what you're doing, but
Speaker 3: in the different you know, over a different medium. And
Speaker 3: it's like, you know, I think we had a clear idea,
Speaker 3: like we needed we needed to like see representation. We
Speaker 3: wanted to see like more single like single moms, like
Speaker 3: what's going on like another the other single moms are
Speaker 3: living their lives?
Speaker 4: What the fuck where are you at?
Speaker 3: And it wasn't like it was just like this notions
Speaker 3: like we had an intention, but there wasn't so much
Speaker 3: like there's not so much pressure built up behind it,
Speaker 3: like performing, and so it's just like the release of
Speaker 3: the release of the planning and the like detail of
Speaker 3: how it looks sometimes really is what like like catapults
Speaker 3: it to exist and like and take form in ways
Speaker 3: that you like your mind hasn't even grasped yet, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's actually given you the muscle to understand
Speaker 1: the energy of abundance. Because you do less, you receive more.
Speaker 1: You know, part of abundance is resting, right, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Just chill like how we garden. You know,
Speaker 1: It's like we're not always over the seed, Like okay,
Speaker 1: you ready, come on, how much sun? Come on, sunshine
Speaker 1: get it. You know we're not doing that.
Speaker 4: That's just like I'm gonna water you and leave you here. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I had a plant die when we were in Costa Rica.
Speaker 3: It's been a why for two years and my dad
Speaker 3: must have forgot to water it because it's like in
Speaker 3: a weird place and I was like what the fuck,
Speaker 3: and Orlanda was like throw it away.
Speaker 4: I was like no, I like.
Speaker 3: Watered it, put it in front, put it in front
Speaker 3: of the sun, and I think it's dead to hell.
Speaker 4: And I was like no, no, no, And like.
Speaker 3: The other day, I was like like one little leaf
Speaker 3: and I was like, ah, I knew you would come back,
Speaker 3: but I had no like like I'm like, if you die,
Speaker 3: it's cool.
Speaker 4: You've given me a good two years.
Speaker 3: But like I'm gonna keep I'm gonna keep like trying
Speaker 3: because I.
Speaker 4: Love you, you.
Speaker 3: Know, but it's just like yeah, like that that that
Speaker 3: idea is that like I know that you have the
Speaker 3: ability to re sprout and re like and to exist,
Speaker 3: and I'm just gonna like do the things that I
Speaker 3: know make you exist or feed myself and the way
Speaker 3: that I like, I need to nourish my my myself
Speaker 3: and then the dreams and the accomplishments will kind of
Speaker 3: be fruitful when it's time.
Speaker 1: You know, that's the equation for sure.
Speaker 2: I think hearing that you were life coach and that
Speaker 2: you helped women who you know, struggle with this idea
Speaker 2: of overworking, it's so interesting to me, especially because this
Speaker 2: month we're talking about money, and you know, in previous
Speaker 2: themed months around money that we've done on it has
Speaker 2: been heavily in finance, but this month we've been really
Speaker 2: tapping into different sources of currency, right, And I think
Speaker 2: that a lot of times are our worth is wrapped
Speaker 2: up in our in our in literally like financial like
Speaker 2: how much money we make, or how how much we
Speaker 2: how much output we're putting out, you know, the overworking idea.
Speaker 2: And I think that's so I've never heard of a
Speaker 2: life coach that focuses on kind of the unlearning of
Speaker 2: that concept and that idea. I do feel like now
Speaker 2: in society there's still this idea of like get to
Speaker 2: the bag and yeah, and you know, I feel like
Speaker 2: Team No Sleep has died more for sure, and that
Speaker 2: there is more I think. I think with the with
Speaker 2: the pandemic, it kind of shifted everything into like kind
Speaker 2: of pouring back into yourself, figuring out what it is
Speaker 2: that you know, what self care looks like for you.
Speaker 2: But there's still such I think still amongst women too,
Speaker 2: there's still such a demand and a expectation, especially because
Speaker 2: we are stepping into a space and time where we
Speaker 2: are the heads of households and we want to be
Speaker 2: in ways, and there's this pressure that if you aren't still,
Speaker 2: if you aren't performing, and if you aren't creating, or
Speaker 2: you aren't doing something, that's like you're showing your work
Speaker 2: that you're worthless. Yeah, you know, yeah, and and and
Speaker 2: that's not a and that's not a slight to the
Speaker 2: woman who enjoys work, because I'm one of those women.
Speaker 2: I actually really enjoy working. I don't necessarily. I think
Speaker 2: it's because I found my purpose and so it drives me. However,
Speaker 2: it has drained me too, you know in times and
Speaker 2: like really needing needing affirmations, needing voice, needing to hear
Speaker 2: my voice and and or someone else's voice to say
Speaker 2: like okay, it's okay, you can slow down. Yeah, like
Speaker 2: the world will not stop if you still you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've been hardwired to identify or guess define our
Speaker 1: existence by bringing workers and producers and performers. We have
Speaker 1: a K through twelve education system that kind of indoctrinates
Speaker 1: you in that you know, you're there most of the year,
Speaker 1: majority of the day, majority of your life, K through
Speaker 1: twelve and to teacher, hey, you do this, you get
Speaker 1: an A. You do this, you get three stars. And
Speaker 1: then you go to high school the same thing. You
Speaker 1: get a certain score then yeah, raw raw. Then you
Speaker 1: get that validation from the adults. Adults are like, well,
Speaker 1: accomplishment and you know, so you start and part of
Speaker 1: human psychology regarding our happiness, human happiness, validation is a
Speaker 1: part of that. Like when you're a kid and like
Speaker 1: look mommy, and look what I drew and it's just
Speaker 1: so scribbly scratched, like you know, that's still part of
Speaker 1: us even yeah, Like I mean, the whole reason why
Speaker 1: social media exists is because we want validation. It's share,
Speaker 1: it's show and tale like how you did in kindergarten,
Speaker 1: Show and tale. So it's like, at the end of
Speaker 1: the day, we have to understand what we are and
Speaker 1: how we're designed. Why am I saying that, because you
Speaker 1: understand that when you first got to this place, they're
Speaker 1: telling you work, perform, produced, This is how you get happiness, validation, reward,
Speaker 1: all of that. So now we got these new ideas
Speaker 1: that says, I don't have to do this. I love myself,
Speaker 1: I'm worth my rest, I'm worth my eed. So now
Speaker 1: we have to child, We gotta you know, decondition from
Speaker 1: that and feed the new ideas. This is literally like
Speaker 1: not any like hippie knowledge. This is like neurological facts.
Speaker 1: I'm sure y'all know you know what I'm saying. So
Speaker 1: you have to like kind of create like a marketing campaign,
Speaker 1: an advertising campaign that markets to your hearing, your senses,
Speaker 1: your site, your speech, your everything around you. Like that's
Speaker 1: why vision boards are so important, mute affirmation music is
Speaker 1: so important because this campaign has to be advertising these
Speaker 1: new ideas for your brain to be like, oh.
Speaker 4: Actually that makes more sense. No, right, it is, like
Speaker 4: it's crazy.
Speaker 3: We have to have to produce a campaign to go
Speaker 3: back to our like natural our natural state because the
Speaker 3: truth of the matter is, like when we're indoctrinated into
Speaker 3: these programming. That's what they're doing. But they've done it
Speaker 3: for so long that it's program so it takes pro
Speaker 3: I mean, it takes reprogramming to get back to our
Speaker 3: like our natural existence. And even I was thinking, like
Speaker 3: you know about you working in like life coaching and
Speaker 3: like workaholism is like for women too. We're programmed even
Speaker 3: as little girls, like you know, can it be a
Speaker 3: good girl?
Speaker 4: Like it's not.
Speaker 3: Easy, it's it's for love, and it's not even like
Speaker 3: it's not just performing in like a works place. And
Speaker 3: obviously like women are had a household and like heavily
Speaker 3: and like uh in the work field in this point,
Speaker 3: and you know, and we are trying to get to
Speaker 3: a bag and there is something to prove, like I'm
Speaker 3: independent and I can take care of my fucking self
Speaker 3: and I don't need shit. But there's also like the
Speaker 3: aspiration for women to not only like now work but
Speaker 3: also like keep the house clean, take care of your children,
Speaker 3: for cook you know, like all the laundry should be completed,
Speaker 3: like be a good wife. Like there's like for love
Speaker 3: and for acceptance in society. And like if I go
Speaker 3: drop off my kids for a week, everyone's gonna be
Speaker 3: looking at me like what the fuck.
Speaker 4: Are you okay? Are the kids okay?
Speaker 3: Like, yeah, bitch, I need a break, you know, Like
Speaker 3: it's it's performative and it's like workaholism shows up in
Speaker 3: a different ways every area, and like for women, I
Speaker 3: don't think we even realize that that's a part of it,
Speaker 3: like feeling like our worth is tied to our productive productivity,
Speaker 3: even in like domestic invite, like even at home.
Speaker 2: Even like the stay at home wife or the stay
Speaker 2: at home mom, not realizing and then and society definitely
Speaker 2: use that for sure, because people don't regard and don't
Speaker 2: respect the mother who stays home the ways they don't.
Speaker 2: They don't realize what a task that is. It's no idea,
Speaker 2: you know. But yeah, I think it's I think that,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm so curious to know how you know
Speaker 2: this work and I know how this work has led
Speaker 2: you to I guess healing within yourself too, like being
Speaker 2: able to share these affirmations and write them down, like
Speaker 2: are they personalized to things that you're going through in
Speaker 2: your experience when you're writing these or a.
Speaker 1: Great question it's literally my medicine. First it took me,
Speaker 1: I think after the last album that I did have
Speaker 1: five projects out, I was like, oh my god, this
Speaker 1: is for me because literally every time when affirmations for
Speaker 1: the Grown Ass Woman came out, immediately entered an initiation
Speaker 1: process of growth, like time to grow up, time to
Speaker 1: mature you. You know what I'm saying, You too childish
Speaker 1: in a lot of ways. When I had ic me mantras,
Speaker 1: as soon as it dropped, I had to go into
Speaker 1: initiation of self awareness. That almost it was just like
Speaker 1: a lot me versus every me affirmation self love. It
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I'm about to fight. I'm fighting every
Speaker 1: demon like every like, and I don't even think it
Speaker 1: was mine. I think it was just like in my generations,
Speaker 1: you know, the the darkness of shame and guilt and
Speaker 1: blaming men like it's your fault, it's your fault, choose me,
Speaker 1: choose me, give me more. Like it was just like
Speaker 1: all these things I was fighting with in myself and
Speaker 1: so for me, I look at it like this music
Speaker 1: is my medicine. First. I have to benefit from it first.
Speaker 1: It has to heal me first. And I'm gonna let
Speaker 1: the world watch me take my own medicine and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna share it with y'all in real time. This this
Speaker 1: my I've been so shocked, I mean completely like rock
Speaker 1: my world to realize how much I did not practice
Speaker 1: my own message and music. I was like, whoa, I
Speaker 1: got so many music songs about hold your womb, sacred
Speaker 1: sexual healing through you know, boundaries, and I just have
Speaker 1: all these elaborate, beautiful songs, very sincere, but I'm like,
Speaker 1: I ain't practicing none of it.
Speaker 2: Well you know, so yeah, I do know because we
Speaker 2: sit on a podcast every single week and and and
Speaker 2: give unsolicited advice about shit, and we aren't always applying
Speaker 2: to our lives. However, I will say that I think
Speaker 2: that is the first step. It is the acknowledgement, is
Speaker 2: planting the seed, is realizing like it is, even saying
Speaker 2: it and then going back and being like, oh shit,
Speaker 2: that's for me, that's.
Speaker 3: For me, that's for me, or saying it over and
Speaker 3: over and over and I'm not even listening to the
Speaker 3: shit I'm saying, like, I know it sounds good, so
Speaker 3: I'm telling that, I'm saying it.
Speaker 4: I'm not integrating it into my life.
Speaker 3: And then it's like even the power of speaking it
Speaker 3: is like, damn, bitch, you said this a lot of
Speaker 3: motherfucking times, like are you shifting to make it a
Speaker 3: shift or like even like you've tried, you're trying a
Speaker 3: lot of times, and like can you give yourself grace
Speaker 3: in that time or like are you just getting up?
Speaker 3: Like because for me, if I find myself having a
Speaker 3: behavior that I don't really like, like but I can't
Speaker 3: like I'm sucked into it in ways, it makes me
Speaker 3: like avoid it. I'm an avoid so there's ways like
Speaker 3: I will just like shut off that part of me.
Speaker 3: And it's like, no, bitch, you gotta go down the
Speaker 3: hall and figure it out, like why are you avoiding
Speaker 3: and why? But it's like the power of speaking. It
Speaker 3: is like where the power comes out because it's like
Speaker 3: releasing it. And right now we have a we have
Speaker 3: a merch drop. It's a beautiful sweatsuit from the Manifest University.
Speaker 3: But the back says words are spells, yes, And I
Speaker 3: know for some people you know that can be off
Speaker 3: putting spells whatever, But it's the truth, you know, just
Speaker 3: like in the Bible there's prayers, you know, like there
Speaker 3: like there is so much power in speaking, and like
Speaker 3: even when you said like it resonated with me about
Speaker 3: you know, you were dealing with things that you don't
Speaker 3: even think we're your own. And that's another thing, like
Speaker 3: I don't even think we recognize that, you know, until
Speaker 3: we're ready or until we were like take the time
Speaker 3: to actually tap into the feelings. It's like sometimes the
Speaker 3: feelings that we're harboring truly.
Speaker 4: Aren't our own. There are we inherit things from from
Speaker 4: the women before us, from the men before us, and
Speaker 4: we are so we're trying to battle with things not
Speaker 4: even realizing.
Speaker 3: Like I don't even fucking understand why I'm jealous. I
Speaker 3: don't understand why I'm angry. I don't understand like I've inherited,
Speaker 3: you know, like intense suspicion, like what I.
Speaker 2: Can trush you like it doesn't feel like it even
Speaker 2: resonates with you, but you're holding it for some reason.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like I don't believe in that, but I've seen
Speaker 4: my mom believe in it, and I've seen like I've
Speaker 4: seen her be like almost held prisoner to it.
Speaker 1: And listen to music that talked about it. I watched
Speaker 1: entertainment that.
Speaker 2: All all the things we intake that we don't even
Speaker 2: realize just like plant into our into our into our
Speaker 2: hearts and our minds and our body.
Speaker 4: I was listening.
Speaker 3: I was reading George's book All All Boys Aren't Blue,
Speaker 3: and I haven't gotten very far, but it's really good.
Speaker 3: And he has a he has like a part where
Speaker 3: he says, I realized it was happy for me to
Speaker 3: identify with like it was hard for me to identify
Speaker 3: with happiness.
Speaker 4: And he was like, and I feel like that's a
Speaker 4: lot for our culture.
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, you always hear people say, like,
Speaker 3: where's that old Mary, where's the hurt Mary?
Speaker 4: And you know, we all love hurt Mary.
Speaker 2: Did he's out.
Speaker 4: We all love hurt Mary.
Speaker 3: And it feels oddly good to like relate to her pain,
Speaker 3: you know, Like it feels good just to like to
Speaker 3: go to that place of heartbreak because you've been there,
Speaker 3: you know. But it's like sometimes when you're like really
Speaker 3: happy and at peace, it's harder to kind of like
Speaker 3: feel safe in that. You're like, why do I feel
Speaker 3: like I'm happy? Like I'm in love? Like things seem
Speaker 3: pretty good, but it feels uneasy because it's easier for
Speaker 3: us to like identifying it and feel comfortable in the pain.
Speaker 3: And when he said that, I was like, damn, that's deep,
Speaker 3: you know, because we've all heard that comment, and it's
Speaker 3: like we've all experienced struggle, even on a like cellular level,
Speaker 3: like on an ancestral level, there's been deep you know,
Speaker 3: like deep heartbreaks and family being pulled away from us
Speaker 3: in relationships, and like you know, and it lives in
Speaker 3: our spirit.
Speaker 1: It does. It's it's like a it's a genetic archive
Speaker 1: in our bodies of the trauma, of the memories and
Speaker 1: things like that. So we have to understand, like especially
Speaker 1: as women in the central. Yes, the central nervous system
Speaker 1: is literally the kingdom. That the kingdom, and so when
Speaker 1: you understand that it has been it's it's a whole
Speaker 1: system that has been used to pain. It's used to
Speaker 1: a certain rhythm and cycle, and when you interrupt that
Speaker 1: cycle with peace with these it's like wait a minute,
Speaker 1: we're not you were used the casts, you know. So
Speaker 1: it's just like it's all you know, for me, it's
Speaker 1: been a journey, like I'm sure for a lot of
Speaker 1: us of like self soothing the nervous system as you
Speaker 1: go into a space of normalizing you know, generosity, integrity, trust, goodness,
Speaker 1: you know, security, safetiness when you're experiencing other people because
Speaker 1: we're so used to experiencing humans the bullshit, you know.
Speaker 4: We expect it.
Speaker 1: When's where is it coming?
Speaker 4: When's the bullshit coming?
Speaker 3: And then it made me, you know that that really
Speaker 3: made me have to realize that, like you have to
Speaker 3: trust your growth, you have to trust your evolution, you
Speaker 3: have to trust that.
Speaker 4: Like I mean, then obviously.
Speaker 3: We've all back pedaled, We've all, you know, been with
Speaker 3: that fuck guy, and we're like, bitch, you're we're past this, bitch,
Speaker 3: are we still doing this?
Speaker 4: Are we still doing this? You'll still have sick diking me, bitch.
Speaker 4: We didn't that whole.
Speaker 2: Details for what you know.
Speaker 4: But but it's just like that's that's a part of
Speaker 4: it too.
Speaker 3: It's like it takes time, and it takes like it's
Speaker 3: a practice. It really is a practice, and and to
Speaker 3: the point where it's almost difficult to talk about And
Speaker 3: I think we should talk about this more.
Speaker 4: That like there are no healed people.
Speaker 3: And you can be an affirmation singer, and you can
Speaker 3: have a podcast and a microphone and you can give advice.
Speaker 3: And I can come up here and pretend like I've
Speaker 3: got all of my shit together, and I know all
Speaker 3: the answers because I've been podcasting for five years, but
Speaker 3: like the truth of the matter is, like, let's be real,
Speaker 3: Like it's gonna in our journeys, it's gonna continuously come up.
Speaker 3: They're going to continuously be.
Speaker 4: Obstacles where we'll retract and we'll be like, bitch, you're
Speaker 4: better than this, and.
Speaker 3: Like so it's just like a like you can know
Speaker 3: something and then to implement it an action, it takes
Speaker 3: time to get reprogrammed to that and then start to
Speaker 3: like like trust that I've grown enough that I'm going
Speaker 3: to attract the people that are for me, and that
Speaker 3: I can trust and trust myself that I'm choosing wise,
Speaker 3: so then I can let my guard downs, Like, bitch,
Speaker 3: you're not the person you were five years ago when
Speaker 3: you were comfortable on that fun shit, so be so
Speaker 3: be accepting of the people that are in your place,
Speaker 3: in this place right now that you've attracted because you've
Speaker 3: done the work to attract the right circle.
Speaker 1: That is that titty is definitely out.
Speaker 2: Titties. Her titties fight, they fight the shirts.
Speaker 1: Do you name your titties?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 4: I haven't like the right titty, left titty but.
Speaker 2: Do you name your titties? What are their names?
Speaker 1: Veronica in Elaine, Elaine, Veronica is the bigger one.
Speaker 3: Maybe if I name him, name them and identify them,
Speaker 3: they'll stop trying to come out like see me.
Speaker 4: See me.
Speaker 1: Like Veronica get In talked about this space.
Speaker 4: She acknowledged us, and now we can have a seat.
Speaker 2: You need to communicate with your titties, just like you
Speaker 2: need to communicate with everybody. Hi, you guys speak of communication,
Speaker 2: you also must.
Speaker 4: We're going into a podcast. I can't have you about
Speaker 4: on the algorithm.
Speaker 2: We were talking earlier before we hit record and were
Speaker 2: you were telling me that, you know, communication is uh
Speaker 2: is the ultimate self love is you know the basically
Speaker 2: is that what you said.
Speaker 1: That's no, it's fine, You're close. Communication is no affirmations
Speaker 1: is the language of self love.
Speaker 2: Is the language of self love. And that resonated with
Speaker 2: me because you know, we talk a lot of We
Speaker 2: always share an affirmation on the show. And you know,
Speaker 2: me and Smila have talked about just affirmations in friendships,
Speaker 2: affirmations with our children and just and and just also
Speaker 2: just come straight communication and just the power of using
Speaker 2: your voice out loud. And I mean obviously we know
Speaker 2: the power of that just because of you know, what
Speaker 2: we do here. But I've realized, you know, in sitting
Speaker 2: down and talking every week so much, so much has
Speaker 2: come up for me where I'm like, oh shit, like
Speaker 2: I'm not over that, or like and and things even
Speaker 2: come up and you talk about this. I talk about
Speaker 2: this in the book that we have coming at you, guys.
Speaker 2: Make sure you check out A Good Mom's Guide to
Speaker 2: Making Bad Choices, which is on pre sale right now.
Speaker 2: Hit the link in this episode description humble Uh you.
Speaker 4: Got some for gifts with it too, so shameless.
Speaker 1: Plug plug plug plug.
Speaker 2: But I talk about my relationship with my father and
Speaker 2: how it's been a very long journey of forgiveness and
Speaker 2: for him, and even at points where I thought I'd
Speaker 2: already forgiven him and then it's come up that I
Speaker 2: hadn't and how speaking out loud and not even to
Speaker 2: him has been extremely transformational for me. And just like
Speaker 2: you know, talking out loud, like I do this, we
Speaker 2: have I have this exercise in the book and that
Speaker 2: and I've shared on the show too, where I, you know,
Speaker 2: walking around there's a school in front of my house,
Speaker 2: and I was walking around the school vocally out loud
Speaker 2: forgiving him, like, in a way, my dad is here,
Speaker 2: I can do this with him right now. But the
Speaker 2: amount of times in which I need to release and
Speaker 2: say this would be crazy for me to call him
Speaker 2: up and be like, Daddy, I need to tell you again,
Speaker 2: and how you piss me off on my sixteenth birthday
Speaker 2: and you know, like, but just the power of saying
Speaker 2: things out loud, repetitively is so important to the healing.
Speaker 2: Especially I feel like when you when you can't get
Speaker 2: the healing from that person too, because some people are like, well,
Speaker 2: I can't forget my daddy. My daddy ain't here or
Speaker 2: he's not sorry, you know, and like using the tool
Speaker 2: of your own voice in releasing and and even recording
Speaker 2: your own voice and listen listening to it back, because
Speaker 2: you know, it's one thing to listen to someone's someone
Speaker 2: someone talk to you, but it's another thing. It's even
Speaker 2: more powerful in your own voice, hearing that from your
Speaker 2: hearing that from yourself, and I can only imagine how
Speaker 2: powerful that has been for you. You have albums of yourself
Speaker 2: talking to yourself.
Speaker 1: It's wild. I listened to myself. I'm like Dan, not
Speaker 1: that girl. We talk about. I'm like, oh, that's me.
Speaker 1: I'm like I said that, I wrote that. I was like,
Speaker 1: I'd just be like, whoa.
Speaker 4: I'm like, where does she get we're in the source?
Speaker 4: Did she come up with this?
Speaker 1: But I'm telling you I've been writing since I was
Speaker 1: a kid. I just didn't know it was of something
Speaker 1: valuable to share. But to your point about repetition, I
Speaker 1: want to make a statement about knowing thyself, knowing what
Speaker 1: you are, like, the power repetition is so important for
Speaker 1: you to translate what you know into your embodiment because
Speaker 1: it's like, think about billionaire, billion dollar companies and brands
Speaker 1: and icons and leaders in the world. You made it.
Speaker 1: Why are you still hustling for our attention? You got
Speaker 1: your message in the magazine, social media, ads, on the bus,
Speaker 1: you know, billboards, commercials everywhere. Why you hustling for little
Speaker 1: old me? Why you want my attention and you constantly
Speaker 1: put it in front of my face to buy your food?
Speaker 1: You know it's because the power of repetition. It impacts
Speaker 1: the subconscious mind to influence your habits and behaviors. So
Speaker 1: when it comes to yourself again, you have to advertise,
Speaker 1: you have to campaign, you have to market. You have
Speaker 1: to march period, so that repetition even if you like, man,
Speaker 1: I don't know if I want to be about that
Speaker 1: forgiveness game by my parents. The truest information and to
Speaker 1: say is I'm open and I'm willing where I'm resistant
Speaker 1: to be more forgiving of my parents. I look, I
Speaker 1: attract thought, partners, heart allies to help support me in
Speaker 1: that forget. You know what I'm saying, Get real, honest
Speaker 1: with yourself and where you're at. You know, I keep
Speaker 1: saying it more and more and more. You know, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it gotta be real. It got it. Like I mean,
Speaker 1: think about the guys who talk weird game like man,
Speaker 1: you're so beautiful, Like it's like fake, like come on, bru,
Speaker 1: shut up. But if somebody's like, hey, how you doing,
Speaker 1: like you know, just talk to you, like, hey, how
Speaker 1: you been doing since post pandemic? You know, just real
Speaker 1: human and human talk. It's more real. So when you
Speaker 1: talk to yourself, keep it real. Don't be fancy and awe,
Speaker 1: you know, doing the most. Sometimes you gotta just be
Speaker 1: real with yourself with where you're at.
Speaker 4: You know, that's the thing.
Speaker 3: Like it's it is easy to talk to others it's
Speaker 3: easy to give advice. It's a whole different ballgame when
Speaker 3: it has to be applied to you. You know, it's
Speaker 3: a whole different like experience. You know, like I did
Speaker 3: a family constellation recently, and at the end of it,
Speaker 3: she is basically like telling me to repeat what she says,
Speaker 3: and she's like, mom, Like I'm talking to my mom,
Speaker 3: I'm talking to my dad, I'm talking to little Mila,
Speaker 3: and like, I've never met this lady in my fucking life.
Speaker 2: We explained the people with consolation because people are like,
Speaker 2: what the fuck is that?
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, so family constellation is I honestly, I've only
Speaker 3: seen it once on like Love Sex and Gup on
Speaker 3: Netflix with fucking uh, who's the girl that does that?
Speaker 2: I don't remember her name when.
Speaker 3: So it's just really interesting thing where basically the person
Speaker 3: the practitioner, it has a person I go and they
Speaker 3: they create a field and you don't know who the
Speaker 3: people are in the field are going to be, and
Speaker 3: you just tell them some background about who you are,
Speaker 3: your family history. She asked me, like my immigration story,
Speaker 3: she asked me about my mom, my dad, diseases like
Speaker 3: that I run in my family deaths, that have happened,
Speaker 3: how people have died, just like general family history that
Speaker 3: I mean some I knew, some I didn't now. My
Speaker 3: relationship with my parents have wonership with each other. So
Speaker 3: then she tells me to place these papers on the floor.
Speaker 3: She put full numbers on each paper. Place them on
Speaker 3: the floor, and then she's like, play somewhere every want
Speaker 3: and then show me. I was like, what the fuck
Speaker 3: She's like, now you know, go to the first go
Speaker 3: to which everyone calls you first, and stand on it
Speaker 3: and so and the other, and like if you don't
Speaker 3: do it online.
Speaker 4: The other version of it is there are volunteers.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was looking at can I read this definition
Speaker 2: because I feel like it really okay? This is from
Speaker 2: actually goop.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: You meet with a group of strangers and each person
Speaker 2: has a chance to be the main point of focus
Speaker 2: of their own family constellation. A facilitator selects others from
Speaker 2: the group to represent significant family members, and you all
Speaker 2: work together by role playing characters and acting out familiar
Speaker 2: family dynamics.
Speaker 3: Well here's the thing, is like say it for me,
Speaker 3: I was getting the family family constellation and maybe I
Speaker 3: don't know you guys, and they choose you to play
Speaker 3: in my field like.
Speaker 4: I'm grandma, but I don't know that.
Speaker 2: But you don't know. I don't know that.
Speaker 3: They'll just put you in different places and then maybe
Speaker 3: I'll go stand next to you, or I'll stand next
Speaker 3: to you, and then you guys will channel someone who
Speaker 3: doesn't know me at all, and you'll be like, well,
Speaker 3: I feel sad, I feel angry. I don't and then like, well,
Speaker 3: look at number look at number two. How do you
Speaker 3: feel now? Like I don't want to look over there.
Speaker 3: It's really strange, and it's like or people just like.
Speaker 4: I feel like a little girl.
Speaker 3: Like you have to be really willing to be like
Speaker 3: captured by whatever energy captures you. But at the time
Speaker 3: I don't know. So for me it was these papers.
Speaker 3: I stood on the papers and she's like, well, how
Speaker 3: do you feel? And I was like, what the fuck
Speaker 3: are you doing? She's like, I know this is weird.
Speaker 3: I'm like, bitch.
Speaker 4: So I'm like, I mean, my room's standing on a
Speaker 4: number one.
Speaker 3: And I was like, well I feel, you know, whatever
Speaker 3: I feel, And then the second one, you know, I moved.
Speaker 3: She's like, go to show whatever number you feel called
Speaker 3: to go on next, and then the second one I
Speaker 3: went and I sat and I like felt like kind of.
Speaker 4: Like like happy, like childlike. I don't know why I
Speaker 4: didn't think of it. And then I sat there for
Speaker 4: the lawn.
Speaker 3: She's like, just just sit and see how you feel,
Speaker 3: see how your body moves. She's like taking notes. And
Speaker 3: then I was like, oh my god, I feel like
Speaker 3: I need to cry cry. I'm like, this is really weird.
Speaker 3: What the fuck are you doing to me from a distance?
Speaker 4: What are you doing to me on zoom? So I
Speaker 4: start crying, like She's like it's okay, I know this
Speaker 4: stuff is weird. I'm like, what the fuck.
Speaker 1: Is going on?
Speaker 3: And then I moved through all the numbers, feeling and
Speaker 3: like just kind of giving her how I feel and
Speaker 3: somethings I felt nothing, sometimes I felt more of other things.
Speaker 3: Then we sat down and then she tells me who
Speaker 3: each number was one that I cried on.
Speaker 4: It was my childhood's.
Speaker 3: Self, so like, you know, you know, there's all these
Speaker 3: different and even the placements are significant, you know, like
Speaker 3: my mom was in between me and my dad, and like.
Speaker 4: Do you feel like that?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: It was just all these different dynamics, and then at
Speaker 3: the end we like move, we moved the papers to
Speaker 3: be in a more like I don't know, like flowing
Speaker 3: like place or way, and then I stand on one
Speaker 3: of the papers and then she tells me to look
Speaker 3: at the paper and she's like, Mom, I know, I
Speaker 3: know you did the best with what you can, but
Speaker 3: I am and I accept. Like it was like a
Speaker 3: like a like a speech to my mom, I speech
Speaker 3: to my dad, I speech to my younger self. And
Speaker 3: I was just like bawling, and I'm like, this is
Speaker 3: crazy that this lady that I've never met in my
Speaker 3: life's telling me what to say and it's triggering me
Speaker 3: in these ways because it's things that I didn't realize
Speaker 3: I've needed to say, and I don't have the I
Speaker 3: didn't have the.
Speaker 4: Strength to say, hey, Dad, you hurt me.
Speaker 3: And I and I and I asked, I'm asking you
Speaker 3: for permission to surpass you, like if that's what she's
Speaker 3: telling me, I'm asking your permission that I like to
Speaker 3: surpass you in all the ways emotionally like, and it
Speaker 3: was just like this crazy experience and it made me realize, like, damn,
Speaker 3: I'm fragile and there are things that I need to
Speaker 3: say that I'm scared of saying and like how powerful,
Speaker 3: like even knowing the power and healing that words have
Speaker 3: given me even in this space, and feeling free in
Speaker 3: ways to say all types of shit on the internet,
Speaker 3: you know, talk about sex, talk about like things I've experienced.
Speaker 3: But then when it comes to like the people closest
Speaker 3: to me and these intimate things and this pain that
Speaker 3: I've harbored or like anger that I haven't really like
Speaker 3: really addressed. Because now this like random white ladies telling
Speaker 3: me what to say to my mom and dad, I'm
Speaker 3: fucking bawling. It was an interesting like practice to be like, Okay,
Speaker 3: there's obviously some like more there that needs to like
Speaker 3: be uncovered, but all that to say is just like
Speaker 3: even me in this space so comfortable speaking and then
Speaker 3: you you know, put in this environment where I have
Speaker 3: to speak to you know, the things that are like
Speaker 3: close I've so close to my heart, that are like
Speaker 3: I've been hurt over or held onto and not even
Speaker 3: realizing I'm holding onto, are much more or much more
Speaker 3: difficult to release, like with words.
Speaker 4: You know, it's like that throat chakra needs to be like.
Speaker 2: Yeah cleared out.
Speaker 1: M m m hmm. Wow, that's beautiful, you know, any
Speaker 1: woman who goes back, goes back to the past as
Speaker 1: like as though as the museum and become an observer
Speaker 1: and like kind of like a three D virtual world
Speaker 1: of like going back to feel the feelings. It's not
Speaker 1: real because it's not in the now, but you virtually,
Speaker 1: through your spirit, through your emotions, through your mind, you
Speaker 1: go back and you feel the stuff that you really
Speaker 1: didn't have the skill sets to feel. You had to
Speaker 1: survive those things. And when a woman does that game changing,
Speaker 1: because all you do is you open up yourself to
Speaker 1: deeply feel the joy from just being alive, the joy
Speaker 1: of being able to put makeup on, the joy of
Speaker 1: eating banana. You're like, why am I feeling gratitude for
Speaker 1: just these little things. It's because you opened up your
Speaker 1: emotional intelligence to feel the pain first deeper, and when
Speaker 1: you're able to feel that, you just expand your skill sets,
Speaker 1: your emotional skill sets, to feel all the goodness that's
Speaker 1: actually here for us. You know, So congratulations for going deep.
Speaker 1: Thanks going into the museum of your childhood. That's not easy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I've done it in ways, but not
Speaker 3: obviously in that setting.
Speaker 4: And even erica like the fact.
Speaker 3: That you need to do, Like it's like we know,
Speaker 3: but we have to remember, and then we have to
Speaker 3: honor the space where it's like, am I gonna walk
Speaker 3: around the block and talk out loud to someone who's
Speaker 3: not here?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: You know, like am I gonna go to my childhood
Speaker 3: house and like go find me? Like it takes a
Speaker 3: certain mindset to be like even open to that, because,
Speaker 3: like you said in the beginning, and we've said this
Speaker 3: a lot of times, it's like, you know, if I
Speaker 3: tell people, like you know, people that they're like, that's
Speaker 3: some white people shit or some hippie shit, like bitch
Speaker 3: you did why you want to hear room and steptons
Speaker 3: on numbers? Like okay, girl, you know, like it sounds wild,
Speaker 3: but like when we're open enough to access and then
Speaker 3: be like, you know, this is weird, but fucking let
Speaker 3: me see like how beneficial it could be, you know,
Speaker 3: and then feeling the shift and then having and then
Speaker 3: being in safe spaces enough, being in sister circles where
Speaker 3: you could be.
Speaker 4: Like, hey, girl, so let me tell you what I did.
Speaker 3: You should try it too, you know, and feeling safe
Speaker 3: enough to do that because a lot of times people like.
Speaker 4: It's just that devil work.
Speaker 3: You know, like people feel scared of those intuitive moments
Speaker 3: where you're like, damn, like something's telling making me go
Speaker 3: this way.
Speaker 4: Just honoring that inner voice.
Speaker 2: Yep, yeah, I know for sure, honoring I mean I think,
Speaker 2: I mean something told you that that was something that
Speaker 2: you needed, you were called to do and im and
Speaker 2: then now look at what you've been able to, you know,
Speaker 2: cultivate because of just following intuition, following just like something
Speaker 2: deeply deep within you that needed needed that.
Speaker 1: The medicine, Yeah, medison. I needed it. Like I didn't
Speaker 1: know what I was doing. Never been in a studio.
Speaker 2: I went to LA like I told you music before
Speaker 2: or no so music nothing. I came back and I
Speaker 2: applied for a loan, got the loan, and I got
Speaker 2: in the studio and I took what you know, I'm
Speaker 2: my background in psychology and I'm a neuroscience nerd, and
Speaker 2: so I took all that information to say, I'm gonna
Speaker 2: create my own process how I create music.
Speaker 1: So I became like a mad scientist. Like every song
Speaker 1: had a whole life. You know how when you were
Speaker 1: kids and you played barbies and they had a whole
Speaker 1: name life. Kids drama situations like each song, like I
Speaker 1: gave each song that type of lifestyle, and I was like,
Speaker 1: this is my process, like and this is fun like it.
Speaker 1: So I was just like, let me just do this
Speaker 1: and see what happens. It wasn't about becoming a musician.
Speaker 1: It was just a wellness tool. And then like a
Speaker 1: year later, you know, I became a full artist and
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty one was my first year performance ever
Speaker 1: in life, you know. So, I mean I came from
Speaker 1: the church, so it's like when you you know, I
Speaker 1: went to the wine Ins Church, so it's very music
Speaker 1: bas so it was like that a little bit helped
Speaker 1: a little bit, But I'm in vocal lessons. I'm learning
Speaker 1: this whole thing, you know. But it's fun because it
Speaker 1: feels like a quest to see how much more can
Speaker 1: Tony Jones play this version of herself as an artist
Speaker 1: and see what else is here? Because it feels better.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: It's also a testament that you can switch it an
Speaker 2: you can switch your just switch your where you think
Speaker 2: your life's purpose is at any point, at any moment,
Speaker 2: your journey can change your profession, can change the way
Speaker 2: you look at you know, how you think you're going
Speaker 2: to get to.
Speaker 1: The goal can.
Speaker 2: Change, you know, and sometimes it's not through nine to five.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it is Sometimes it's affirmation, musical affirmation. Sometimes it's podcasting,
Speaker 2: sometimes it's whatever it is, Like it's okay, but when
Speaker 2: when you step into what you're supposed to be doing,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 3: And it may not make sense. It doesn't necessarily have
Speaker 3: to make sense. Like you probably put so much money
Speaker 3: into schools and like formal training and like we are
Speaker 3: so attached to that.
Speaker 2: But it's but it's worked. But you've able you're able
Speaker 2: to still use use it, right, you know, I still
Speaker 2: able to use it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Because I started out as my big dream was
Speaker 1: to be a model when I was a kid, and
Speaker 1: then it evolved into like, well I missed out with
Speaker 1: my modeling years, so let me become a stylist. So
Speaker 1: I lived out in New York for a minute, you know,
Speaker 1: a hot minute, and was working you know for John
Speaker 1: Barbados and all these other design houses through sacks and
Speaker 1: things like that. So I saw like the fashion world.
Speaker 1: But then I was like, wait a minute, this is
Speaker 1: fulfilling a talent but not purpose. And so but even
Speaker 1: come back full circle, I'm like I'm an artist.
Speaker 2: It wait, hold on, I get to put the clothes on. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I get to perform, like, I get to be by,
Speaker 2: like I get to talk my shit.
Speaker 1: Yes, I get to be fly. I get to share
Speaker 1: my mind. And I'm a thinking woman, you know. I
Speaker 1: get to share my depth and it be reflected backed
Speaker 1: at me by the millions of people that are like, yo,
Speaker 1: we deep too, we wretch it too, we think too.
Speaker 1: You know. What I'm saying is like, oh, because when
Speaker 1: you follow your purpose, God or whatever it is you
Speaker 1: believe in, will then bless you with all the seeds
Speaker 1: that you've planted along the way, and they'll start to moom,
Speaker 1: and they'll start to take form and they'll make sense.
Speaker 2: I think about even you know, my journey here. And
Speaker 2: I wanted to be an actress my whole life. I
Speaker 2: wanted to be a singer my whole life. So I'm
Speaker 2: a writer and so I you know, I learned how
Speaker 2: to use garage band, I learned how to record myself,
Speaker 2: I learned how to talk in front of the camera.
Speaker 2: I took vocal lessons. You know. I did all these things,
Speaker 2: and you know, some of those some of those dreams,
Speaker 2: you know, passed for me, or i've you know, I
Speaker 2: lost they lost their shininess and in ways, or I
Speaker 2: got discouraged in ways, And then I think about coming
Speaker 2: full circle and hit podcasting. When we started our show,
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I know how to record audio. Yeah,
Speaker 2: not because I was trying to be a podcaster, but
Speaker 2: because I, you know, I was writing music. Oh I
Speaker 2: know how to edit video. Oh I know how to
Speaker 2: be in front of a camera. Oh I know how
Speaker 2: to write some shit. I don't know if it's professional,
Speaker 2: but I did some writing once upon a time, you know.
Speaker 2: And how all these little talents kind of come up
Speaker 2: and they finally make sense and you're.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, I got it, I got it. It's like
Speaker 1: nothing ever experience in your life is not ever used.
Speaker 3: Every experience it's such like an important tool to like
Speaker 3: where you end up. And it's like that's why like
Speaker 3: people who have like bad experiences and it leaves a
Speaker 3: bad taste in your mouth. It's like it's always a lesson.
Speaker 3: There's always a reason.
Speaker 4: And I also think like we're so.
Speaker 3: Also programmed to think that our purpose in like in
Speaker 3: has to be like our profession has to be like
Speaker 3: with this like very strict training like it has to
Speaker 3: fit into this box, you know, and then it doesn't
Speaker 3: allow us, it doesn't really give us space to tap
Speaker 3: into our own gifts, like our natural gifts. And like
Speaker 3: I love to talk and I love people and I
Speaker 3: love to talk to people, but I didn't think that
Speaker 3: that was enough, you know, Like I can't just show
Speaker 3: up as myself and talk. And I'm like, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean, Like that's not enough to like sustain
Speaker 3: a lifestyle, the lifestyle that I think I need to be,
Speaker 3: Like I want to have this, so I should. I
Speaker 3: need to go to school, and I need to have
Speaker 3: this many clients and I need to sell this many
Speaker 3: packages and then I'm going to be successful, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean. It's like all the things that I'm good,
Speaker 3: naturally good at that I didn't think really had value
Speaker 3: are actually the things that are valuable and are bringing
Speaker 3: me monetary value and also like spiritual value.
Speaker 4: Because I feel like.
Speaker 3: I'm empowering, like there's a there's a strong cycle that's happening.
Speaker 3: Like I feel like I'm constantly in spaces with amazing
Speaker 3: women who have messages to offer me and lessons to
Speaker 3: offer me.
Speaker 4: Because it's just the it's just the the cycle of the.
Speaker 3: The giving and the receiving, the eCos ecosystem and like
Speaker 3: putting it out and being open to receiving it. And
Speaker 3: it's like I don't I don't know everything, but I've
Speaker 3: been I've shifted my idea of what like how success
Speaker 3: can look and really been like, oh, bitch, being a
Speaker 3: people person is a true skill and that's why you
Speaker 3: could be in Costa Rica and like, and I'm like
Speaker 3: when I say people person, like I want to sit
Speaker 3: deep and connect with you and learn about you.
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh wow, that's so intriguing to me.
Speaker 3: I had no idea that's who you were and that's
Speaker 3: what you were going through and it brings me so
Speaker 3: much like oh like that I went through that, and
Speaker 3: oh this is how you dealt with it, and that makes.
Speaker 4: So much sense.
Speaker 3: You know, Like this like information that I get to
Speaker 3: receive and give just from other women's journeys, and it's
Speaker 3: so valuable. And I didn't realize how valuable it was
Speaker 3: until I got into this space and like kind of
Speaker 3: blindly followed this, like it's just it's.
Speaker 4: Like this hobby.
Speaker 3: But it's like, you know, it's like we underest me
Speaker 3: that are natural gifts and abilities because we're so.
Speaker 4: Yeah, programmed to think that it.
Speaker 3: Has to come with a degree and we have to
Speaker 3: go to law school and you know what I mean.
Speaker 4: And like back in the.
Speaker 3: Day, people are like you, this child, she will be
Speaker 3: the midwife, This child is gifted. This child this is
Speaker 3: you don't mean like as a child, like oh, she's
Speaker 3: the artist or whatever.
Speaker 1: The athlete, the doctor.
Speaker 4: And you're not like contained, you can have more than
Speaker 4: one talent.
Speaker 3: Yes, you know, and it's like no, actually, I do
Speaker 3: do this and this and this and this, and you know,
Speaker 3: and I'm good at it.
Speaker 1: That's the that's the that's the thing. I'm actually good
Speaker 1: at it. I'm good at what I do. You know.
Speaker 1: That's the undeniable piece and feeling.
Speaker 4: Worthy, feeling like, yeah, I am good at it.
Speaker 2: And I don't have to.
Speaker 3: Have a fucking law of fucking piece of paper from
Speaker 3: Harvard that said I'm good at it. Bitch, I'm telling you,
Speaker 3: and I've seen the results because my friends told me.
Speaker 2: But I feel that your work is an affirmation, So
Speaker 2: you're constantly affirming what you do in your work. So
Speaker 2: like that's also like what a blessing for that to
Speaker 2: be the work, you know, and it's extraordinary.
Speaker 1: I'm in awe that this has happened. Yeah, I'm in awe.
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to cut you.
Speaker 2: No, I didn't have anything I would to say. I
Speaker 2: was just thinking like wow. Imagine I think for us
Speaker 2: like we think like wow. My work is really just
Speaker 2: really analyzing everything that I've done in my past that
Speaker 2: has gotten to me, that's gotten me here and and again,
Speaker 2: like connecting with other women and talking about what they've done.
Speaker 2: Your work is literally like affirming yourself all the time,
Speaker 2: walking in whatever the choices are that you've made, and
Speaker 2: affirming yourself again, even after you fuck up, affirming yourself
Speaker 2: that's okay, they're gonna make a better choice and that.
Speaker 2: But that is also your job.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's incredible because it's legit medicine because it
Speaker 1: has one of the most potent medicines in the universe,
Speaker 1: which is sound, which is music. Music has a medicinal legacy.
Speaker 1: It eventually became known just as entertainment. But music really
Speaker 1: goes into the psyche, into the places maybe your therapy
Speaker 1: sessions can get into.
Speaker 2: That basic language that we've been limited to cannot We've
Speaker 2: been given this language as it means to be able
Speaker 2: to communicate, which is it's very important, right, But there's
Speaker 2: something other like otherworldly and spiritual about sound and the
Speaker 2: creation that that takes place with sound.
Speaker 1: It's amazing. It's amazing that the testimonies of what this
Speaker 1: music has done to people is so extraordinarily overwhelming to
Speaker 1: me because it's my self talk and I'm sharing it
Speaker 1: with other people. But I also think it's just it's
Speaker 1: just having an open heart whatever you do, whatever you do,
Speaker 1: I don't care if it's like you just write. Just
Speaker 1: having an open heart component to whatever you create makes
Speaker 1: it more potent to actually touch the hearts and minds
Speaker 1: of people. Because people fucking hurting.
Speaker 2: Right now, and a lot, like a lot.
Speaker 1: I've been in spaces with people I haven't seen in years,
Speaker 1: and it's been around them whatever, and the obvious bleeding
Speaker 1: out that's happening, the anxiety, the mental like it's so
Speaker 1: obvious is like, oh my gosh, and I'm supposed to
Speaker 1: act like nothing's wrong.
Speaker 4: I can hear you screaming.
Speaker 3: I can hear you screaming, but you know, and we're
Speaker 3: like really really blessed to I don't be walking in
Speaker 3: spaces that we're like are questioning and our wellness and
Speaker 3: the love is always at the forefront, you know what
Speaker 3: I mean.
Speaker 4: Like we're not like lawyers like scheaming, you know what
Speaker 4: I mean.
Speaker 3: Like sometimes when you're in like a psychle job where
Speaker 3: it's not really like heart centered, you're not really aware
Speaker 3: that you're that you're bleeding out, that you're not speaking,
Speaker 3: that you're not telling your emotions, that you're not tapping
Speaker 3: into pleasure.
Speaker 4: Because you don't get to talk about it all fucking day, all.
Speaker 3: Day, were thinking about like my inner child, like I
Speaker 3: was triggered my trauma. If we could count the amount
Speaker 3: of times say triggered trauma and healing and fucking a week,
Speaker 3: it's crazy.
Speaker 4: Shadow. We got the language now, right, but these are
Speaker 4: words that like maybe our mom my mom didn't like
Speaker 4: I'm having conversations with my mom right now and I'm like, whoa,
Speaker 4: you know that word. She's like, yeah, my vibration is
Speaker 4: high right now. I'm vibrating very high.
Speaker 2: I was like, okay, well, I just also see and
Speaker 2: I don't know, maybe Tony, you can attest to this too.
Speaker 2: It's like, once you start really doing the work and
Speaker 2: allowing the affirmations to do what they're supposed to do.
Speaker 2: You ultimately even start healing people that you didn't even
Speaker 2: expect to heal, like your parents, in ways, like your elders,
Speaker 2: I didn't have the blessing of this, this this magic
Speaker 2: that you make, or even just the communities and the
Speaker 2: circles that are being created now, Like granted, circles have
Speaker 2: been around with this is not the invention of so
Speaker 2: sister circles, but there's been a huge break and decline
Speaker 2: in it, and there is a resurrection happening and awakening.
Speaker 2: And I just even know, like even with my relationship
Speaker 2: with my own mom, her coming to me for advice
Speaker 2: and ways without coming to me for advice, But this
Speaker 2: is a different conversation, and I'm like, Okay. The other
Speaker 2: day she said to me, she said, honey, you're so God,
Speaker 2: You're so smart. And we were talking about relationships. It
Speaker 2: wasn't about work, it wasn't about business. It was about
Speaker 2: like her, her choices versus the choices that I'm making
Speaker 2: for myself right now, and how she sees that there
Speaker 2: is I'm making a different choice in ways that she
Speaker 2: wishes that she would have made or that she wants
Speaker 2: to make. Now, you know, and that's that's such a
Speaker 2: you're the contrast, such an interesting place to be when
Speaker 2: I don't know, like I haven't, I haven't always felt
Speaker 2: like the like I've been given the space to be
Speaker 2: I don't want to be. Yeah, I guess like the
Speaker 2: teacher and that kind of dynamic and not to say
Speaker 2: like I'm like now I'm Buddha and my mom.
Speaker 4: But you are you are.
Speaker 2: There are aspects that I'm like, huh oh. My freedom
Speaker 2: was like I feel like a bit triggering for her
Speaker 2: at first, and then it's yes that we have and
Speaker 2: and now she's really seeing like the fruits.
Speaker 1: The fruits see that when you get into that place
Speaker 1: of overflow, anybody connected to you, they have no choice
Speaker 1: at this point because you're connected to them. They're close
Speaker 1: to you, so they're there. You're basically like them that
Speaker 1: she's rug each other. Yes, you're signaling, so you're signaling
Speaker 1: to her killing because you're in your overflow. Now you're
Speaker 1: not trying to heal her from a place of I
Speaker 1: have to save you. I have to do these things
Speaker 1: for you. I know you're you're coming from a place
Speaker 1: of abundance because now you're you're bloomy, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. The tree is bloomy and it's bearing fruit,
Speaker 1: and now they see and like whoa, you know, and
Speaker 1: now you're causing thought, You're causing questions, you know. And
Speaker 1: that's that's where the awakening just starts to happen. And
Speaker 1: the beautiful part is she doesn't have to watch on
Speaker 1: TV and find somebody to inspire her. She could look
Speaker 1: at her daughter. So it resonates in the brain a
Speaker 1: lot more because it's close to home, you know, it's
Speaker 1: more believable because I'm like, I'm seeing her do it,
Speaker 1: Like what if I could too? That's my daughter, you know, And.
Speaker 2: I feel blessed to have a mother that's open to that,
Speaker 2: you know, open to those feelings to come through, you know.
Speaker 2: And I hope that I can be that mother to
Speaker 2: my daughter. And I hope that that's the that's the
Speaker 2: standard and how mothers and daughters relate to one another
Speaker 2: as we continue, because I think that, like there's so
Speaker 2: many like lessons to be learned amongst elders and you know,
Speaker 2: and and and every and everybody else, not everybody else,
Speaker 2: but you know, yeah, get the village or like what's
Speaker 2: the opposite of elders.
Speaker 1: Do you do you do you do? You have the
Speaker 1: children the youngest future. Yeah, yeah, it's this is what
Speaker 1: I believe. I believe the next five years things are
Speaker 1: gonna be so good it's gonna blow our minds. I
Speaker 1: can't speak. I really try not to speak for the
Speaker 1: world as long I'm a prophet. I have a message,
Speaker 1: but I feel in my womb, I know in a place.
Speaker 1: I don't know how I know, but I know good
Speaker 1: is more good here. I agree it's too many bitches healing.
Speaker 4: There's too many, so many many house.
Speaker 3: Healing, like like it's happening.
Speaker 4: I feel that. I was, like, I don't know, like
Speaker 4: the fucked up. It is fucked up the world.
Speaker 2: The world is a womb, and we are the majority.
Speaker 4: We're remembering who the fuck we are and that ship
Speaker 4: right there. No nothing can penetrate that.
Speaker 3: Nothing can penetrate that, because like the universe in which
Speaker 3: we birth is on our side. And if you go
Speaker 3: against us, and you go against this movement, it's not
Speaker 3: the universe is not gonna conspire in your face.
Speaker 1: You won't see any abundance.
Speaker 4: We've seen it. We've seen we've seen how the people
Speaker 4: against the against the cause we're out of here.
Speaker 2: It's like what we need, we need, we do need
Speaker 2: the masculine period. You know. We were talking to Supernova
Speaker 2: about this.
Speaker 1: That's the homie. That's the homie.
Speaker 2: Yes, Yeah, And we were talking about this dynamic and
Speaker 2: the masculine and the feminine and just like how we
Speaker 2: can support one another and how we how much we
Speaker 2: need each other's support, and how women how women need
Speaker 2: to support the man's rebranding, and how men need to
Speaker 2: stop calling pussy's weak and just like just the coming
Speaker 2: together of of it and understanding though, like the power
Speaker 2: and respecting the power of the woman. And I think
Speaker 2: there's been such a disconnect because there is an awakening
Speaker 2: of women that there's also like a hate campaign against men.
Speaker 2: And don't get me, don't get it wrong, I've been
Speaker 2: on the bandwagon at some one point or another, you know,
Speaker 2: but ultimately that that that that doesn't do anything to
Speaker 2: really help the collective. But I do believe, and he
Speaker 2: even said himself, like we are in a state of
Speaker 2: emergency for men. It is like we have like we need,
Speaker 2: we need this because they're gonna start dropping, especially because
Speaker 2: there are more women. Yeah, you know, like absolutely, you know,
Speaker 2: and and not and not because but we don't want
Speaker 2: to be out on the world just women. I don't
Speaker 2: want to be on it is.
Speaker 1: Important, it's important.
Speaker 3: I feel like the world super super it will be
Speaker 3: if it's just women.
Speaker 1: Here's here's this is, this is my this is my perspective.
Speaker 1: When there has been an extraordinary imbalance, extraordinary, So anytime
Speaker 1: there's been in balance, if there's extraordinary inflammation area, what
Speaker 1: you do is you start to do drastic changes and
Speaker 1: shifts and habits to bring it back to a you know,
Speaker 1: equilibrium state. So I feel like, yeah, there are some
Speaker 1: hate campaigns going on there, but a lot of people
Speaker 1: have interpreted high aggressive, glorious bad bitch talk as though
Speaker 1: we're going against men, and that's not the case. It's like, no,
Speaker 1: we have to talk big dick energy. We have been
Speaker 1: in such a low state in our power and thrones
Speaker 1: that we have to say I am a goddess, I
Speaker 1: deserve this, I require this, this is It's not about
Speaker 1: we're trying to get you to come to us or
Speaker 1: we're trying to manifest y'all. No, we're building ourselves up
Speaker 1: for being part of a society that has oppressed us
Speaker 1: on a global level for so long and have robbed
Speaker 1: us of our divine identity, our connection to the great
Speaker 1: mother that runs this whole thing.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: Like my one of my closest friends said, if I
Speaker 1: was she said, if I was an evil genius that
Speaker 1: wanted to destroy the whole entire world, the one thing
Speaker 1: I will do is just make the women feel like
Speaker 1: they're less sand make them feel like they have to
Speaker 1: be the last one on the list by the boom,
Speaker 1: by the bank, recipe completed, cooked, baked. We ate it's over,
Speaker 1: you know, and we're living in that time. But now
Speaker 1: women are as you say, the resurrection. We haven't risen.
Speaker 4: We have risen and we're learning.
Speaker 2: I just had just heard rail Rapture. I just had
Speaker 2: the like.
Speaker 1: But why do I why do I see y'all being
Speaker 1: lifted up?
Speaker 2: Cue the Lime King of emoji right now here? Uh?
Speaker 2: You know, it's that's for sure true, I don't.
Speaker 1: I just feel like people think that we're hating, and
Speaker 1: it's like, no, it's just not about y'all. Right Now,
Speaker 1: I'm what I'm doing with men and also book, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm pointing them the supernova. I'm pointing them to sacred sons,
Speaker 1: because I'm like, I've labored for you long enough.
Speaker 4: I can't labor for us.
Speaker 1: I can't. I can't be the rehabilitation center for your awakening.
Speaker 2: Like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and you and I feel like men deserve her.
Speaker 2: Energy, the rehabilitation center of your healing, Like I can't
Speaker 2: be that for you anymore.
Speaker 1: Like we got Google dot com. We got resources, like
Speaker 1: whatever issue you got, you can google it.
Speaker 2: To like see yourself. You have to admit you have
Speaker 2: an issue. You have to want to seek, you have
Speaker 2: to want to And that's why I think men need
Speaker 2: other men. You know they have they have at this point.
Speaker 2: And that's what we talked about too. Women, we cannot
Speaker 2: heal the men.
Speaker 4: You can't as promises that all they needed us and
Speaker 4: we've allowed that, and you can't. You can't like go
Speaker 4: for it. We can support we're going, but you can't
Speaker 4: go to the place that you like, just like you
Speaker 4: can't heal us, you can't.
Speaker 1: The men deserve us to be in it for this
Speaker 1: to be our posture. They deserve us to be in
Speaker 1: this position to say.
Speaker 2: It's gonna benefit that I love you so much, I.
Speaker 1: Have to let you go to yourself and be with
Speaker 1: yourself so you can get a real opportunity to see
Speaker 1: you because you're not receiving the reflection that I am.
Speaker 3: Well, this is the time like as a structure is
Speaker 3: as a structure is like collapsing because it is, Yes,
Speaker 3: it's deeply uncomfortable for that it is.
Speaker 4: It's deeply uncomfortable for some women.
Speaker 3: You see the girls on the internet talking shit like you,
Speaker 3: this is about you don't have a man exactly, you know,
Speaker 3: because we're also we're all.
Speaker 2: And I think about Sorry, I don't mean to interrupt you,
Speaker 2: but I can't help but think about the soft woman
Speaker 2: and how important I think there's both right, But then
Speaker 2: I'm like, yo, like there's also like a very strong
Speaker 2: campaign for very soft women, which obviously I resonate with
Speaker 2: this idea of being a soft woman, But I also
Speaker 2: like wonder, like is that also like going against also
Speaker 2: like not being too loud, not being too boisterous, not
Speaker 2: being and you are walking in your divine feminism.
Speaker 4: It depends how you how you like, how you perceive that,
Speaker 4: because I feel like it comes both ways. Because I
Speaker 4: think a soft woman is I am a soft sensual
Speaker 4: sexy I don't have to say munch, I agree.
Speaker 2: But I wonder if some people misconstrue that concept.
Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't think people really know what
Speaker 1: the softening process is. They don't know like everyone has
Speaker 1: thought this, everybody has.
Speaker 2: We saw that on trap yoga based episode.
Speaker 1: Everybody has a different perspective in every and in different definitions.
Speaker 1: And what I've come to found is what I've come
Speaker 1: to find in my journey from elders and you know
Speaker 1: sagers that I've met that are in the nineties. At
Speaker 1: the end of the day, you got to feel your pain.
Speaker 1: You have to see pain as an invitation. You know,
Speaker 1: from white supremacy and justice, from fuck boys to childhood trauma.
Speaker 1: You have to feel that shit because when you feel
Speaker 1: that pain, it softens the heart parts that have been
Speaker 1: hardening for so long. If you feel it, only if
Speaker 1: you feel it, you gotta feel it because then you
Speaker 1: feel you can feel the resistance, you can feel the
Speaker 1: stiffness and the firmness. And then when you allow yourself
Speaker 1: to really break and open yourself up, there's a softness
Speaker 1: that happens. Even a soft gaze to your past. You
Speaker 1: can look at and be like, oh, baby girl, glad
Speaker 1: we learned that lesson so grateful for him, so grateful
Speaker 1: for my parents imperfections and weaknesses. It gave me exactly
Speaker 1: the lessons that I needed to be the woman under
Speaker 1: that you were able to get soft with all the
Speaker 1: things that have made you harden. And that's what I've
Speaker 1: learned from Elders and that's what I've learned from my journey.
Speaker 1: It's not just about the aesthetics of softness. It's about
Speaker 1: feeling your heart again, feeling that fleshliness that you had
Speaker 1: as a little girl before you knew trauma, before people
Speaker 1: told you anything about yourself. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So that's how I kind of interpret it, and just
Speaker 1: from what I've learned, And when people who can testify
Speaker 1: that softening process, they can be like, bitch, yes, I'm
Speaker 1: in the middle of it, of it, or I've gone
Speaker 1: through it, or I'm on my third round, and be
Speaker 1: like that's it. That's where you get the magic juiciness
Speaker 1: because you're feeling the shit that you've kind of much
Speaker 1: too much. Do y'all know, do y'all Let me tell y'all,
Speaker 1: do y'all know that last year, after ten years, I'm
Speaker 1: ten years into intentional journey and healing trauma. Last year,
Speaker 1: I just found out that I had a mother womb.
Speaker 1: Like I thought it was daddy issues that I saw
Speaker 1: the mother room and I broke. Y'all know Cleo Song,
Speaker 1: I love her music. That album. Mother had me in
Speaker 1: a motherfucking shambos. I said, how does this woman know
Speaker 1: my my life? You know? And I was like, damn,
Speaker 1: I've been so I wrote down the men that have
Speaker 1: had me in like like you know, attachment, bondtchment, you know, whatever,
Speaker 1: if that's the word. And I started to see the parallel.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, I've been singing my
Speaker 1: mother's love through men. And I don't know how long
Speaker 1: I'll be testifying about this, but it's so fresh to
Speaker 1: my consciousness. I'm like, y'all, guess what I found out?
Speaker 1: Like I got to the root of the bullshit behind
Speaker 1: my patterns of the type of men I've chosen. So
Speaker 1: now I'm more equipped. You feel what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: It's almost like I can't help but think. But now
Speaker 2: it's now you got to keep talking about it. I
Speaker 2: gotta keep to keep talking about it in order to
Speaker 2: heal the wound. That to heal the wound, that's the
Speaker 2: thing is that you don't discover the wound and then
Speaker 2: shut the fuck up. Yeah, Like that's where people fuck up. Yeah,
Speaker 2: is when you when you finally find the trigger and
Speaker 2: then you're like, oh no, no, no, no, don't you're not
Speaker 2: talking about this shit. It's like, Okay, well, it's gonna
Speaker 2: just live in fester there forever.
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm a woman on a horse in
Speaker 1: the middle of town, like the queen is dead.
Speaker 4: The queen is that, Like that's how I feel like.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I found that bitch. I found the roots
Speaker 1: that ruts there you are, come here, and then after
Speaker 1: it's like the rest so tusso it's like now they're there.
Speaker 1: I know. Now I gotta be soft with a part
Speaker 1: of me that has been self sabotaging, intimacy, romance, finances,
Speaker 1: you know, security, safetiness, worthy, you die, all of it,
Speaker 1: you know, And that's helped me be soft with my
Speaker 1: life and the complexities of being multi dimensional. The duality
Speaker 1: of ego demons, darkness, shadow, sexy, wretched, contradicting, you know,
Speaker 1: it's I'm like, yeah, I'm all of it. Yeah, just
Speaker 1: wild on this bitch.
Speaker 3: You're finding like the temple like housing it all and
Speaker 3: accepting it all and the pain and yeah, I feel that,
Speaker 3: I really really feel that, and like even I know
Speaker 3: I've talked about it lately a little bit like feeling
Speaker 3: really happy and then like still feeling like like a
Speaker 3: defense and I'm like yeah, and then like having to
Speaker 3: literally like physically disarm like yeah, like relax my jaw
Speaker 3: like that, like really feel myself like what like what
Speaker 3: are you holding on to?
Speaker 1: Wow?
Speaker 2: Like I just got chills, yeah.
Speaker 4: You know, like where are you what are you defending?
Speaker 4: Or what is hurting?
Speaker 3: Like what is it that you're like for no read
Speaker 3: like yeah, that's your first like your first response, you know,
Speaker 3: like think like negative, you know, or like the one
Speaker 3: really is like you're safe.
Speaker 4: Even my boyfriend will be like you're good. We're good,
Speaker 4: Like you're safe.
Speaker 3: You don't have to think about like you're not alone anymore.
Speaker 3: And I have to like in my body, I feel
Speaker 3: my body like.
Speaker 1: I am embodied. I'm just.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's crazy, it's crazy, like why is this take
Speaker 4: so much work?
Speaker 1: And I love that it's not I'm not the Holy one, And.
Speaker 3: I'm even like continuously thinking and it's like with ego,
Speaker 3: with defense, with trust, like like you know in our
Speaker 3: Tanter practice where it's like there's a meditation and it's
Speaker 3: like positive positive thought, positive positive words, no positive thought,
Speaker 3: positive words, positive action, and it's simple, right, But it's
Speaker 3: like that's a whole cycle that has like that we're
Speaker 3: breathing out back into the universe. But I'm like, am
Speaker 3: I constantly thinking positively?
Speaker 4: Or am I thinking?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: It's like the change the shift of like like your
Speaker 3: mind and like I don't know, It's like it's like
Speaker 3: a circuitry. Yeah, it's a circuitry. Am I nourish in
Speaker 3: the frequency that I have done the work to arrive
Speaker 3: to to embody what I've been studying and learning and
Speaker 3: practicing and guessing it? Like is it coming home? Is
Speaker 3: it translating? I'm safe to believe that I've said to
Speaker 3: believe it? But am I safe to live in it?
Speaker 3: Am I living to act in it? Am I safe
Speaker 3: to exist in it? Without thinking about it?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 3: It's like like the belief is one thing, the embodiment
Speaker 3: is something else, and that requires you can know, like
Speaker 3: I can know that that is bad for me, and
Speaker 3: I might still do it, but it's like I can
Speaker 3: know that's good for me? But like and then for me,
Speaker 3: it's like what is that self sabotage is? What is
Speaker 3: what is the obstacle that's keeping you from like implementing
Speaker 3: what you.
Speaker 4: Know to be true?
Speaker 2: I remember, well, I think it's disciplined. Yeah, And I
Speaker 2: think about like affirmations and the discipline that they really
Speaker 2: take to actually work, like do it still, yeah, Like
Speaker 2: you can't just do it one time and bitch your
Speaker 2: new bitch like, no, girl, like you really have to
Speaker 2: commit to to the to the work in any in
Speaker 2: any space, in any healing space and any and anything
Speaker 2: that you do, you know, And I think like that's
Speaker 2: where the work gets challenging.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 4: The work gets fun.
Speaker 2: It gets fun, gets challenged.
Speaker 4: Because it can't be frustrating if you're like.
Speaker 2: You know, it's kind of like it's like meditating. It's
Speaker 2: like the first maybe hundred times you're like this is
Speaker 2: oh God, Like you're anxious. You're like, oh i'll try later.
Speaker 2: That didn't do ship, that didn't work, or like I
Speaker 2: can't do this. I'm not good at this. Maybe I
Speaker 2: just can't do this. Maybe this isn't my thing, you know,
Speaker 2: maybe I made it all up, Like bitch, no, I
Speaker 2: think it's everyone's things for your brain to chill out,
Speaker 2: like it's everyone's thing for your brain to chill out
Speaker 2: like you know. So it's it's a practice. It is,
Speaker 2: it's a practice. And so I'm just I'm just so
Speaker 2: grateful for the work that you do and that you've
Speaker 2: blessed honor and you've blessed our our community. I want
Speaker 2: to say it's for everyone, but I know how much
Speaker 2: it's it resonates with women of color and hopefully even
Speaker 2: men of color too. A cipher with another life with
Speaker 2: a man or some shit I want to do.
Speaker 1: I want to do something with Super because I know Super,
Speaker 1: I know some of his friends, his allies I've worked with,
Speaker 1: so I trust his embodiment of what he believes and
Speaker 1: so and that's the only space I have for when
Speaker 1: it comes to masculine, Are you in integrity with your
Speaker 1: embodiment of what you know where it translates how you
Speaker 1: interact with people and women people you know you know specifically,
Speaker 1: So I would love to do something with a guy
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's it would be lovely because I
Speaker 1: think people need to see more of that divine masculine,
Speaker 1: divine feml and playing around, you know, and not fighting. Yes,
Speaker 1: you know, we're done fighting. I have a song called
Speaker 1: deer Man where it talks about that. I don't listen
Speaker 1: to it right now because I'm still I'm still integrating
Speaker 1: some of these new found revelations about the men. I'm
Speaker 1: still digesting some things and processing some things. But at
Speaker 1: the time I was very zealous, like.
Speaker 4: Men include men in the yelling and message, you know.
Speaker 1: And so I wrote that song and I haven't listened
Speaker 1: to it and quite some time. I might have to
Speaker 1: listen to it and get back to see what comes up.
Speaker 1: If I resisted, like fuse, or if it's gonna be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: this is true, this is you know, we see you,
Speaker 1: we see you myself. Yes, do it all, you know.
Speaker 3: Speaking of affirmations, we always do an affirmation on the show.
Speaker 3: So what a perfect person to do the affirmations for
Speaker 3: us to speak?
Speaker 1: So is it? I just say it out loud? Okay,
Speaker 1: you repeat it. I deserve, I deserve my sovereign will,
Speaker 1: my sovereign will to choose to choose my abundance, my abundance,
Speaker 1: my emotional abundance, my emotional abundance, my mental abundance, my
Speaker 1: mental abundance, sexual abundance, sexual my financial.
Speaker 2: Abundance, financial abundance.
Speaker 1: This is my existence, this is my existence. I own it.
Speaker 2: I own it.
Speaker 1: I'm willing to do the work. I'm willing to do
Speaker 1: the work for it to resonate, for it to resonate
Speaker 1: and translate and translate into my embodiment, into my body.
Speaker 1: This is how it has to be. This is how
Speaker 1: it has to be for me, for me on period period,
Speaker 1: just because just because that on that that forever facts,
Speaker 1: forever facts, So be it, so be it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2: I love it even how it like sound just like
Speaker 2: I felt like trickling through my body and like the clothes.
Speaker 1: Just start following.
Speaker 2: How saying it and just really going forward and not
Speaker 2: Sometimes affirmations can be short, but like at that that length,
Speaker 2: it's special.
Speaker 1: It's really special. This was so lovely. This is so lovely,
Speaker 1: so lovely.
Speaker 2: Ever were doing hotels you want to hear Tony's horror,
Speaker 2: make sure you check out our Patreon. We're gonna switch
Speaker 2: over to the Tribe channel aka Patreon, So go to
Speaker 2: patreon dot com backslash Good Mom's Bad Choices. We have
Speaker 2: a lot of other content over there, so go check
Speaker 2: us out.
Speaker 4: It's for the top secret.
Speaker 1: Ship goes top secret.
Speaker 2: Good Mom's after dark. Well, first we're gonna do I
Speaker 2: think we should do?
Speaker 4: Uh saro.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's terot time. Y'all should have a jingle.
Speaker 4: It is okay, yes, you just can't he Maybe we
Speaker 4: should sing it time.
Speaker 1: It's territime. It's time music.
Speaker 4: I know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're sucking up the whole mystical music that play.
Speaker 1: But that was fun.
Speaker 3: So you know what when I was when I was
Speaker 3: shuffling for her, she chose this one. But there's another
Speaker 3: one that looks that jumped out, so I'll read both.
Speaker 3: The moon represents your fears and illusions are and often
Speaker 3: comes out when you're projecting fear into your present and
Speaker 3: you and your future based on your past experiences. You
Speaker 3: may have a painful memory that caused emotional distress, and
Speaker 3: rather than dealing with the emotions, you push them down
Speaker 3: deep into your subconscious. Now these emotions are making a reappearance,
Speaker 3: and you may find yourself under the influence on a
Speaker 3: conscious or subconscious level. For example, if you had a
Speaker 3: car accident when you were young but didn't deal with
Speaker 3: the emotions, you may get sad or anxious every time
Speaker 3: you get into the backseat of a car. To remedy this,
Speaker 3: connect with your subconscious mind and release any fears or
Speaker 3: anxieties holding you back. Hypnosis, therapy, and shamanic healing can
Speaker 3: support this process. The moon can indicate time of uncertainty
Speaker 3: and illusion, when nothing is what it seems. Be careful
Speaker 3: of making fast decisions when the moon appears, because you
Speaker 3: may later realize you only had half the information you needed.
Speaker 3: You need to listen to and trust your intuition so
Speaker 3: you can see beyond what is in front of you.
Speaker 5: Hmm.
Speaker 3: Wait, feel into your situations rather than thinking what they mean.
Speaker 3: Let go of your conscious mental blocks or negative self talk,
Speaker 3: and allow your intuition to guide you.
Speaker 4: So wow, this makes sense.
Speaker 3: We talked a lot about going back to that young
Speaker 3: person inside and going back to feel the.
Speaker 2: Things limiting belief systems and negative self talk, reprogramming yourself.
Speaker 3: And then this fell out as I was shuffling. Let's
Speaker 3: see what this means. You know those moments when you
Speaker 3: glance around and feel your heart overflowing with love and
Speaker 3: appreciation for everything you have created in your life. That's
Speaker 3: what the Nine of Cups is about. Emotional fulfillment, happiness,
Speaker 3: and contentment. When this card appeals and appears in a
Speaker 3: tarot reading, you're content in all aspects of your life relationships, work, lifestyle,
Speaker 3: well being, and more. You're basking in the abundance of life.
Speaker 4: Way where to go.
Speaker 3: You're basking in the abundance of life and experiencing your
Speaker 3: emotions which such intensity and pleasure. This is why the
Speaker 3: nine of Cups is often called the wish card. It
Speaker 3: comes as a sign that the planets aligned and you
Speaker 3: have everything.
Speaker 4: You wished for. You could not be happier.
Speaker 3: If you made your wish and are patiently waiting for
Speaker 3: it to come to fruition, then this card is an
Speaker 3: excellent omen that they will soon be granted. Wow, deal
Speaker 3: with the shadow side and all your wish will be gifted.
Speaker 2: Stop the negative self toxis and go check out Tony
Speaker 2: Tony Jones.
Speaker 1: I am Tony Jones dot com.
Speaker 2: Yes, Yes, that is that where all our people can find.
Speaker 1: Is that the best place for me? I am Tony
Speaker 1: Jones dot com. I am Tony Jones on Instagram. I
Speaker 1: also have a membership community called the living Room where
Speaker 1: we do self talk together. It's all for women who
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just wanted to create a space
Speaker 1: where women didn't have to do something else, you know,
Speaker 1: so we really learn how to do being this and
Speaker 1: living not all for productivity and performance, but really communicating
Speaker 1: and kicking it, you know. So that's that chilling chilling
Speaker 1: in the living room. Living room.
Speaker 2: Well, thank you so much for coming on the show.
Speaker 1: Thank you for having me. This is so fun. I
Speaker 1: felt like I was in a living room.
Speaker 4: What we were going for, like.
Speaker 2: The girl, then the woman, then I love all those
Speaker 2: goddess Then yes, they felt like that, Like.
Speaker 1: The vibe here isn't connected to that the vibe here
Speaker 1: translates into the Instagram for sure. I feel you guys.
Speaker 1: I'm like, well they really feel this. I'm like, I
Speaker 1: love their family forever because y'all are really about that
Speaker 1: embodied ye.
Speaker 3: You know it's so crazy like that you said you
Speaker 3: knw Supa because we were just talking to him about
Speaker 3: frequency and when you're amitting your frequency, you find your
Speaker 3: people and you do.
Speaker 4: He came, then you came, and then here we are.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, it's all we're all part of the circuitry.
Speaker 3: Well, you know where to find us Good Momsbad Choices,
Speaker 3: Dot com Please go pre order our book, The Good
Speaker 3: Mom's Guide to Making Bad Choices. We are really putting
Speaker 3: out a collective manifestation to be New York best time
Speaker 3: selling authors. So please put your collective energy to have done.
Speaker 2: And we need you. We need our try, We need
Speaker 2: you guys, And you know, I hope that our stories
Speaker 2: resonate with you, and I hope that you know you
Speaker 2: share the message. And I want to hear your feedback.
Speaker 2: It's our first book, you know, I want to know
Speaker 2: what you guys. Thanks, So I hope you'll support us
Speaker 2: and go check out our book.
Speaker 3: And also check out our Patreon because we'll be telling
Speaker 3: a lot about how this book came to be, diving
Speaker 3: deeper into chapters, sharing a lot of the two year
Speaker 3: journey behind the scenes. And I think it's pretty it's
Speaker 3: pretty cool. So come check us out. Come here the
Speaker 3: uncensored version of every episode, and thank you.
Speaker 2: We'll see you guys next week.
Speaker 1: Bye bye,