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Speaker 1: Someone's building their new wardrobe. Okay, what are some essential

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Speaker 1: you seeing this year?

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Speaker 2: The jelly shoes are coming back. I never saw that happening.

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Speaker 2: I also can't believe that flip flops are back.

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Speaker 1: They're back. This week's guest is may Riley. She is

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Speaker 1: the powerhouse stylist behind some of the most unforgetable looks

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Speaker 1: on red carpets. May have styled icons like Katie Baba,

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Speaker 1: Megan Fox, and Janelle Maneg. What's trending right now that

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Speaker 1: you love? And is it a trend that you sawed?

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Speaker 1: That's funny? Okay, what trends are you really disliking right now? Ooh?

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Speaker 3: You know the capris are coming back and I'm curious. Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm curious.

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Speaker 1: It's like you could style them. But I'm such a.

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Speaker 3: Believer in like our challenging times are usually the moments

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Speaker 3: where we grow the most.

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Speaker 1: Anytime I've been in.

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Speaker 3: Like the darkest place, it's brought me to the next

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Speaker 3: best sort of like level the heartbreaks or whatever. Like

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Speaker 3: it feels like you're down here, but then you if

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Speaker 3: you do the work and you really use it as

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Speaker 3: an opportunity to learn and grow, you can really up level.

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Speaker 1: I'm Rady Tavlikia and on my podcast A Really Good Cry,

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Speaker 1: we embrace the real, the messy, and the beautiful, providing

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Speaker 1: a space for raw and field of conversations that celebrate

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Speaker 1: vulnerability and allow you to tune in to learn, connect

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Speaker 1: and find comfort together. Thank you so much for being

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Speaker 1: on this podcast.

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Speaker 2: I congratulations on your own Thank you.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to have you on here because I

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Speaker 1: feel like I have admired you, known you, and secretly

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Speaker 1: stalked you for a while now online. Thank you. And

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Speaker 1: I think sometimes there's a big blur between actually knowing

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Speaker 1: someone and feeling like you know someone online. I binge

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Speaker 1: watched your YouTube videos recently, so we're basically best friends

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Speaker 1: in my mind.

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Speaker 2: Want to have your book in my kitchen.

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Speaker 1: It's like, you know, yeah, it's But one thing I

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Speaker 1: realized I don't know is for everybody out there, may

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Speaker 1: Mav is how you pronounce it. I just want to

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Speaker 1: make sure Mave is just the og and og stylist,

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Speaker 1: like she is incredible at what she does. Not only

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Speaker 1: is she incredible when you watch you in a YouTube videos,

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Speaker 1: she just is so sweet, so kind and also just

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Speaker 1: so herself. And I really love that about watching you

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Speaker 1: thank you, but also styles everyone from like everyone that

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Speaker 1: you could possibly think of. She styles. But I want

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Speaker 1: to know how did you get into this space? Like

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Speaker 1: was it your dream from childhood?

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Speaker 4: Well?

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Speaker 3: Fashion was my dream from childhood. I was definitely like

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Speaker 3: my yeah, like I just I went to f T.

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Speaker 3: I took classes there in high school. Like fashion was

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Speaker 3: always a thing. But this was twenty years ago, pre

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Speaker 3: social media, pre Rachel Zoe. Like, you know, styling was

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Speaker 3: not something that people knew about.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know about it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was kind of a background thing, right.

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Speaker 2: Yes, it was just like no visibility whatsoever. I really

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Speaker 2: had no idea.

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Speaker 3: And my dad was producing a TV show and basically

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Speaker 3: had said to the stylist like, cause you give my

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Speaker 3: daughter a chance.

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Speaker 2: And I was, you know, eighteen, and.

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Speaker 3: He had said to her, if she sucks, it's fine

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Speaker 3: and fire her, but like, would you give her?

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Speaker 2: Don't keep her just because she's like the Boston yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know daughter.

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Speaker 3: So I walked onto this TV set in New York

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Speaker 3: and I was like, I just like couldn't believe I'd

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Speaker 3: never been on a set or like seen anything like it.

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Speaker 3: And the stylist was like, here's my credit card, run

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Speaker 3: to Burgdorfs and get every pair of beige pants you

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Speaker 3: can find it like a size six. It's an emergency.

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Speaker 3: And I'm like okay, She's like save your receipts. I'm

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Speaker 3: like okay, you know, and I go and I do it,

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Speaker 3: and like I just couldn't believe that this was like

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Speaker 3: a real thing and like a real job. And that

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Speaker 3: was basically the very beginning of it. And then you know,

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Speaker 3: I went to fat I worked in retail, but I

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Speaker 3: just knew like this was what I wanted to do.

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Speaker 3: And I just hustled to find on Craigslist by the way,

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Speaker 3: like there was no wow, yeah, and I like hust

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Speaker 3: so I ended up finding Robin Marriel, who are still

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Speaker 3: very good friends to this day. They were styling Rihanna

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Speaker 3: at the time, and I like banged down their door

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Speaker 3: through a mutual friend and they hired me to be

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Speaker 3: like their New York assistant. And so that was of

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Speaker 3: the beginning of like the celebrity stuff. And I learned

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Speaker 3: so much from them at that time and eventually landed

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Speaker 3: in LA and just like kept chasing you.

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Speaker 1: Know, what would you say now, because obviously you've been

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Speaker 1: doing this, what twenty years. Yeah, yeah, what would you say?

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure it changes over time. But what's the

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Speaker 1: best part of your job? Like what do you love

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Speaker 1: about what you do?

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Speaker 4: You know?

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Speaker 3: I think it's the way that I get to help

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Speaker 3: people feel and like really make them feel confident. Like

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Speaker 3: there's nothing like that, especially like the behind the scenes

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Speaker 3: of what's going on in their personal lives. Are having

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Speaker 3: a bad day or feeling insecure, and then you know,

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Speaker 3: they put on this look and it's like, all of

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Speaker 3: a sudden, just like a different energy, you know, and

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Speaker 3: it's like we say, like their armor in a lot

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Speaker 3: of ways. Yeah, Like getting to be a part of

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Speaker 3: that for somebody is such a gift.

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Speaker 2: It's not about the clothes.

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Speaker 3: For me, it's like really about what the energy of

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Speaker 3: the clothes can put forward for And like obviously when

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Speaker 3: the world likes it, it's wonderful and lovely, but that's

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Speaker 3: not really the intention. But that's how you know it's

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Speaker 3: good when it connects with other people, you know, Like

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Speaker 3: what Hayley and I did together was like, you know,

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Speaker 3: connected with people, that's why, And it was like attainable

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Speaker 3: and it was like, oh, like I can go and

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Speaker 3: sort of recreate that and then you know, you see

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Speaker 3: all these little girls doing.

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Speaker 1: Definitely it is it's ill, by the way, always iconic anything.

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Speaker 1: I feel like anything that she does ends up feeling

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Speaker 1: a fashion and like an icon in fashion. And I

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Speaker 1: really think that you must have been such an integral

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Speaker 1: part of that jet.

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Speaker 2: And like a we still do. I mean, we're still

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Speaker 2: very good friends.

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Speaker 3: But it's also the connection, like you don't always have

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Speaker 3: that with everybody, and like it can be a great

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Speaker 3: working relationship, but I think what she and I have had,

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Speaker 3: or like Megan Fox and I have had, are very

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Speaker 3: like just sort of deep connections, and I feel like

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Speaker 3: we were just meant to be in each other's lives

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Speaker 3: during those periods, you know, and like it was very chismic,

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Speaker 3: you know, very meant to be totally.

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Speaker 1: I can really, I really feel what you said about

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Speaker 1: it creating an armor and energy when you put clothes on,

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Speaker 1: because you know, I've done very small like shoots and

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Speaker 1: little things for my business or for things for my cookbook,

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Speaker 1: and as soon as I'm wearing something that I don't

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Speaker 1: feel comfortable in, my entire body language changes, I feel small.

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Speaker 1: I'm constantly trying to like hide bits of me that

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Speaker 1: I feel I don't want to be showing, or that

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Speaker 1: I don't feel is flattering on me. And as soon

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Speaker 1: as I put on something, the photographer sees it straight away,

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Speaker 1: like God, you really like that outfit, Like you can

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Speaker 1: see it your you know, your your shoulders are higher,

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Speaker 1: you're walking differently, and it does. It's like style and

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Speaker 1: how people what people wear. It can be such a

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Speaker 1: beautiful reflection of who they are, but also completely shift

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Speaker 1: their confidence, their energy, their mood. And I think that

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Speaker 1: is such a it's such a beautiful thing that you

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Speaker 1: do for pe people. Yeah, you bring out the best

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Speaker 1: version of themselves through the physical external like place, but

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Speaker 1: at the same time you're helping them bring out what's

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Speaker 1: inside through without them having to say anything exactly.

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Speaker 2: It's like such an honor.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's so much bigger than I think what people realize.

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Speaker 3: And obviously all of the mayhem that happens behind the

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Speaker 3: scenes just to even get the clothes in the room.

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Speaker 2: You know, no one even understands, like what goes into.

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Speaker 1: Give me ah, God, no, I mean something.

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Speaker 3: I mean it's just you know, it's relationship building. It's

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Speaker 3: like all about your relationships, and it's like the stuff

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Speaker 3: you learn as a kid. It's like the stuff my

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Speaker 3: dad tried to tell me when I was young, you know,

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Speaker 3: like trust is the most important thing, and these brands

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Speaker 3: are trusting you, and and they're trusting the client is

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Speaker 3: trusting you to like bring forth their vision and not

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Speaker 3: push your own vision on them.

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Speaker 1: I think is also really important.

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Speaker 3: And like like you said, you know, I know in

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Speaker 3: a fitting, when someone puts something off, they like immediately

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Speaker 3: immediately like before, and I know when to push, like

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Speaker 3: I know, I know, and it's like oh no, no, no, wait,

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Speaker 3: give this a chance.

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Speaker 2: Yes, And then I know when it's like no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: this isn't it at all.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And that's like your intuition, you know. It's like

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Speaker 3: learning to like listen to yourself.

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Speaker 2: And also obviously as you get.

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Speaker 3: To know somebody, but a lot of the time it

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Speaker 3: boils down to them being like, Okay, we have these

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Speaker 3: two choices, which one is it made?

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Speaker 1: Yes? And I often say, like I need.

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Speaker 3: To marinate, So I ask them if I can just

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Speaker 3: have a moment, even if it's an hour, and I

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Speaker 3: just like, I don't know, I just have to like

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Speaker 3: really ask myself, like what's the right thing for this?

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Speaker 3: And most of the time I'm right. I think you know,

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Speaker 3: you've been right many many times.

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Speaker 1: I think you know, when people see certain jobs or

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Speaker 1: you know, certain lifestyles, whether you're a content creator, whether

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Speaker 1: you're a stylist, the way that you are, they'll think, oh, wow,

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Speaker 1: it's so glamorous, like you know, the surface the surface

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Speaker 1: perception is, oh, she just gets to pick clothes up,

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Speaker 1: try them month, she gets free stuff. She probably gets this.

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Speaker 1: But actually, if you think about the qualities that one

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Speaker 1: would need to do the type of job that you're having, Like,

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Speaker 1: what would you say, are the qualities you've had to

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Speaker 1: really build and strengthen through the work that you do.

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Speaker 3: Well to your point, yes, it is not like it's

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Speaker 3: just it's the least probably glamorous job. And I always

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Speaker 3: say it's usually the assistants who don't last because it's

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Speaker 3: to the as it like as that being an example

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Speaker 3: of like you have to love this so much to

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Speaker 3: go through it and to like stick with it and

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Speaker 3: not give up along the way because it is so

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Speaker 3: excruciatingly hard and painful and like takes you away from

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Speaker 3: your life and your family and just everything, and like

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Speaker 3: you have to love it or you won't make it. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I mean even in the last I mean, there's been

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Speaker 3: many times where I'm like I'm done. Yeah, I cannot,

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Speaker 3: you know, I cannot keep doing this, and you just whatever.

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Speaker 3: I just know that it's my purpose. I know it's

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Speaker 3: where I'm supposed to be. And I also am such

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Speaker 3: a believer in God in the universe, and like sometimes

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Speaker 3: you're just you're brought through like peaks and valleys, you know,

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Speaker 3: and you just got to keep going.

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Speaker 1: You're looking for someone to work with you, whether it's

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Speaker 1: an assistant or someone that's coming on to your team.

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Speaker 1: What are like the main qualities that you look for

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Speaker 1: or the qualities that you saw in yourself when you

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Speaker 1: look back now that that kept you going through the hustle.

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Speaker 3: Well, it's funny because who I was then is not

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Speaker 3: who I am now. Okay, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 3: And what I would look for now is probably not

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Speaker 3: who I was back then. Like, I feel like I've

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Speaker 3: learned so much. You know, in the beginning, I didn't

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Speaker 3: have an agent. I was like this young, pretty girl,

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Speaker 3: like just trying. I was in music in the beginning, okay,

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Speaker 3: And I think you know, when you don't have someone

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Speaker 3: advocating for you, and you're a young pretty girl. I

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Speaker 3: was like in like the wrapping world, Like I was

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Speaker 3: just a shriky kind of vibe.

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Speaker 1: Many seasons we go through in life so many.

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Speaker 2: And you know, you get taken advantage of her.

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Speaker 3: People try to pay you under what you're you know worth,

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Speaker 3: or you're on set for thirty hours and they don't

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Speaker 3: pay overtime, and like there's no one like sticking up

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Speaker 3: for you. So at some point I like had to

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Speaker 3: I don't know, like tough enough, but bit I was

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Speaker 3: always a tough kid and like not to get too

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Speaker 3: into like my childhood, but.

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Speaker 2: I was like a bullied kid. And so I came

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Speaker 2: into my adult life.

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Speaker 3: With already this sort of like armor and this like

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Speaker 3: toughness about me. And then you're in this industry where

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Speaker 3: you have to like you know, advocate for yourself and

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Speaker 3: not get walked all over and not be taken advantage of.

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Speaker 3: And that comes with like a roughness that's actually not

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Speaker 3: who I am at all, But I kind of had

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Speaker 3: to be that, I thought for a long time. Obviously,

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Speaker 3: then getting an agent and having someone to fight those

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Speaker 3: battles to me, I was able to just be the creative.

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Speaker 3: But to answer your question, like the assistant I was then,

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Speaker 3: I was very like hungry and tough and like no nonsense,

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Speaker 3: whereas today I'm looking for someone who's like sweet and like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I want to be around and who is a reflection

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Speaker 3: of me when I'm not there, you know. And my

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Speaker 3: assistant Rachel's been with me now for like six years.

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Speaker 1: It seems so sweet. It's the best.

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Speaker 3: And you know, she's like a little me, you know,

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Speaker 3: and she sees like, you know, you have to be

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Speaker 3: responsible for the energy you bring into a room, you know,

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Speaker 3: Like who wants to pay a stylist to come in

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Speaker 3: like huffing and puffing with.

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Speaker 2: Their shit excuse me, like their energy of the day.

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Speaker 3: It's like, you know, I have to like leave that

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Speaker 3: aside and come in and be like a bright light

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Speaker 3: and like lift the energy up for them because they're

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Speaker 3: dealing with whatever they're dealing with.

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Speaker 2: And so the same needs to be with my assistant.

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Speaker 1: I agree. Yeah, whenever I've been building teams or you know,

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Speaker 1: building I've got a small team now, but the energy

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Speaker 1: makes such a difference. Like I think I try my

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Speaker 1: best to wake up every day, no matter what's happening

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Speaker 1: in my life. But because I know that there are

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Speaker 1: going to be other people in the room with me

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Speaker 1: while we're working, even silently, while we're working, the energy

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Speaker 1: that I come with, I'm like, okay, I'm starting to

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Speaker 1: stay fresh. I have to bring good energy because as

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Speaker 1: soon as someone comes into the mix or into the

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Speaker 1: room where they're drained, it sucks their life out of

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Speaker 1: other people. It really does. It really does. And so

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Speaker 1: when you're picking, when I always think about this, like

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Speaker 1: when i'm whether I'm whether it's when I'm hiring, or

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Speaker 1: even when you're thinking about the people you want around you,

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Speaker 1: it has to be someone who contributes to the energy

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Speaker 1: rather than takes it, especially someone like an assistant role,

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Speaker 1: because otherwise you just you feel so drained.

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Speaker 3: And I spend more time with her than I spend

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Speaker 3: with like my own husband.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's exactly exactly.

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Speaker 3: We spend our lives together. And it's like, who do

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Speaker 3: you want to be around? You know, and like I

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Speaker 3: just I think being kind and being nice and being

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Speaker 3: sweet not only to your clients, to the world.

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Speaker 2: It is just the most important thing.

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Speaker 3: And so because skills can be toold totally, I mean,

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Speaker 3: taste can't.

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Speaker 1: Be but oh, my god, that's so true.

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Speaker 2: And your job having to say like you're either born

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Speaker 2: with it or you think that.

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Speaker 3: I think you can learn obviously, the like how to

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Speaker 3: send an email, how to do the job, but I

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Speaker 3: think to have taste is typically something either have or

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Speaker 3: you don't. That then obviously can be you know, built

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Speaker 3: and cultivated and all of that.

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Speaker 1: But I think who they.

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Speaker 2: Are is just I don't know, it's important.

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Speaker 3: All my assistants have flourished, and I am like such

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Speaker 3: an advocate for them, Like I want you know, my

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Speaker 3: first assistant from a million years ago has been Kim

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Speaker 3: Kardashian stylist for years. My next one is Becky g Stylish,

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Speaker 3: She's my best friend. My next one is Kylie Jenner's stylist.

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Speaker 3: You know, Like I want them to win, and like

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Speaker 3: I get to be a part of their journey too,

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Speaker 3: and like I want them to say good things about me.

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Speaker 2: For the rest of their time.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely industry.

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Speaker 2: So I just want them all to win.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so nice. I see that in the YouTube

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Speaker 1: videos you see very close to your team. Yeah, what

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Speaker 1: would you say has been you know, some of the

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Speaker 1: hardest parts of your work that you do. Oh god,

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Speaker 1: it's tough.

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Speaker 3: I think our my industry ours, and it's just it's tough.

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Speaker 3: You have to have extremely thick skin. And I'm an empathic,

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Speaker 3: sensitive little being, and it's hard sometimes to separate, not

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Speaker 3: take things personally, not bring in your own like childhood

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Speaker 3: trauma situation, you know, like I was, like I mentioned,

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Speaker 3: I was a bullied kid, and like I feel like

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Speaker 3: part of our industry is very like mean girly yea,

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Speaker 3: And sometimes that can really spark, like just trigger that

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Speaker 3: like oh I'm not getting picked again, of course, you know,

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Speaker 3: like oh I really wanted that client, I didn't get it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, why all of that stuff?

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Speaker 3: And I think, like I said, there are seasons and

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Speaker 3: I know that, but it is hard when you feel like,

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Speaker 3: I don't know, like you're not getting seen or whatever.

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Speaker 1: Like it's just when I was gonna ask that about,

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Speaker 1: you know, with what you were saying about stylists before

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Speaker 1: social media and everything, it's like they're very much so

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Speaker 1: behind the scenes. Yeah, And so one of the questions

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Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you was how do you deal

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Speaker 1: with the concept of it being your hard work? But

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Speaker 1: I'm sure there have been times where you know, have

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Speaker 1: you always got the credit that you wanted for it,

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Speaker 1: and how is someone who this is your creative output

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Speaker 1: if you don't receive the recognition for it. Is that

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Speaker 1: something that you've just come to terms with this part

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Speaker 1: of your job, or is it something you feel is

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Speaker 1: necessary and a vital part of a role that the

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Speaker 1: role that you play.

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Speaker 3: I think it's that's interesting because as social media has

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Speaker 3: obviously progressed and everything the game, like everyone knows everything

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Speaker 3: at all times, So I do feel like we get

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Speaker 3: the credit. I just think it's finding the clients who

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Speaker 3: are comfortable with giving. And I personally have never come

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Speaker 3: from a place of like.

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Speaker 2: I did that. I'm very like weedd that together.

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Speaker 3: It's a collaboratives, you know what you know, oftentimes you

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Speaker 3: style loo for a client and they'll take it home

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Speaker 3: and maybe they remix it a little bit, and that's dope.

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Speaker 3: I love that, you know, like you want to put

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Speaker 3: your own.

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Speaker 1: Spin on things.

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Speaker 3: So I don't know if it's that as much as

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Speaker 3: it's like I think the social media thing is hard

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Speaker 3: because you're seeing what everyone else.

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Speaker 1: Is doing all the time, and that's that's.

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Speaker 3: The scary wheel I think to get on, especially when

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Speaker 3: you feel like you're not getting what you want or deserve,

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Speaker 3: and you're kind of watching other people. So that's the

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Speaker 3: tricky Yeah, you know, yeah, that's not great for my

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Speaker 3: mental health.

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Speaker 1: No, and how did you deal with you obviously, I

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Speaker 1: know you've spoken about this before about being bullied at

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Speaker 1: a young age. Yeah, and that led you into some

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Speaker 1: dark times that you went through. Yeah, how did you? One?

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Speaker 1: What were the things that you ended up going through?

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Speaker 1: And two how did you move through them? Do you

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Speaker 1: have any tools or techniques for people to use that

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Speaker 1: really helped you during that time?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Well yes, and not to say because I was bullied,

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Speaker 3: I am like an alcoholic, but I definitely turned to

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Speaker 3: substances when I was a teenager. I've been sober completely

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Speaker 3: like nothing for almost twenty years, so February will be

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Speaker 3: twenty years. And it's the greatest thing ever, probably the

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Speaker 3: most challenging thing I've ever gone through. I'm such a

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Speaker 3: believer in like art, challenging times are usually the moments

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Speaker 3: where we grow the most.

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Speaker 1: Anytime I've been in.

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Speaker 3: Like the darkest place or the hardest place, it's brought

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Speaker 3: me to the next best sort of like level, you know,

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Speaker 3: like the heartbreaks or whatever.

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Speaker 2: Like's it feels like.

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Speaker 3: You're down here, but then you if you do the

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Speaker 3: work and you really use it as an opportunity to

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Speaker 3: learn and grow, you can really up level, you know.

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Speaker 3: And I've sort of tried to live my life like that, so,

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Speaker 3: you know, in terms of recovery, I think it's like

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Speaker 3: the foundation of like my life and who I am,

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Speaker 3: and I think it's sort of like spiritual kindergarten and

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Speaker 3: then everything.

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Speaker 2: Kind of comes from that.

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Speaker 3: And all the work I've done on myself has been

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Speaker 3: because I've been sober, you know, and like able to

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Speaker 3: dig and like look at myself and be willing to

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Speaker 3: look at myself, you know. And I think, you know,

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Speaker 3: for me, it's a lot about faith. It's like really

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Speaker 3: trusting that everything is happening for us and not to us,

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Speaker 3: and not being a victim, and like really seeing things

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Speaker 3: as like what is this here to teach me? And

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Speaker 3: every time it's been something different, but I just live

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Speaker 3: like that. It's really important to me, like just all right, God,

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Speaker 3: I don't know why we're here.

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm, but let's go. Yeah, exactly. It's it's faith

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Speaker 1: is such an important part of being able to push

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Speaker 1: through things, isn't it.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. A lot of people without it do it.

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Speaker 1: To be honest, I feel for.

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Speaker 3: Them something other than yourself anything, you know, like, and

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Speaker 3: it's changed for me so much over the years. Like

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Speaker 3: I was raised Catholic, that's not how I identify my

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Speaker 3: spiritual practice today. But in the beginning, it sure it worked,

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Speaker 3: and like you know, this beautiful idea of just your

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Speaker 3: relationship with your higher power can be whatever it is

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Speaker 3: you want it to be, and it might be different

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Speaker 3: than everyone else, but it's such a singular process.

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Speaker 1: It's beautiful, and you've created something beautiful from the experiences

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Speaker 1: you had of being bullied. You've got a beautiful brand

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Speaker 1: out right. Local love club clothes are obviously incredible. But

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Speaker 1: you tell us a little bit more about that, because

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Speaker 1: feel like people.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, So you know, when I was given this incredible platform,

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Speaker 3: obviously between followers or clients or whatever, I just always

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Speaker 3: knew because my experience was being bullied was so like

438
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:18,080
Speaker 3: I mean, I was obviously traumatizing and it made me

439
00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:20,919
Speaker 3: who I am today, but it was extremely painful. And

440
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:24,959
Speaker 3: when I see these kids today going through the especially

441
00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:27,680
Speaker 3: the online bullying, it's just like I don't think I

442
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:31,560
Speaker 3: would have made it, like I don't think looking back,

443
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:34,840
Speaker 3: realizing how empathic I was and how sensitive I was

444
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:38,120
Speaker 3: actually but trying to be like I'm fine, I'm fine,

445
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,240
Speaker 3: I'm fine, when I really wasn't fine.

446
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 2: I was really scared, you know.

447
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:46,159
Speaker 3: And it took me so many years to unwind that

448
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,399
Speaker 3: and get back to like that sweetness and that like

449
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:52,840
Speaker 3: innocence that the bullying kind of like robbed me of

450
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:53,679
Speaker 3: at such a young.

451
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:56,919
Speaker 1: Build up, like a hard shell. Don't you totally something

452
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 1: like that, And it's.

453
00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:00,680
Speaker 3: So not who I am and think I would say

454
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:03,639
Speaker 3: for the last decade has not been someone you know,

455
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:05,800
Speaker 3: someone couldn't say, oh she's not nice, you know, like.

456
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:08,320
Speaker 2: I've really really worked through it, I think.

457
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:08,720
Speaker 1: Yeah.

458
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 3: And when I thought about a brand, I knew I

459
00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,600
Speaker 3: wanted to do something that was like sweats and attainable

460
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 3: to most people, but I wanted there to be some

461
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:20,719
Speaker 3: level of messaging about this and like not just seeing

462
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:23,600
Speaker 3: what I've gone through, but also seeing what people go

463
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:29,080
Speaker 3: through online these days, like just the unbelievably painful things

464
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 3: that people say to one another, and like especially with

465
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,960
Speaker 3: my clients. I don't know where this idea of like

466
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:39,639
Speaker 3: famous people should just be you could say anything you

467
00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:42,480
Speaker 3: want to Yeah, like they're not humans. Well I'm here

468
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:45,359
Speaker 3: to tell you they are, and they see it and

469
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:48,080
Speaker 3: they feel it just like the rest of us, and

470
00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:50,720
Speaker 3: it is just mind blowing to me.

471
00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 2: So I wanted something that, you.

472
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,879
Speaker 3: Know, would sort of combat the negativity without using the

473
00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:00,879
Speaker 3: words like you know, I want and to use the

474
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:04,600
Speaker 3: words love and light and not about the dark or

475
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:05,679
Speaker 3: like the bullying. You know.

476
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:08,719
Speaker 2: So yeah, that's the that's the brand.

477
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:11,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's just we donate part of our proceeds

478
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:14,439
Speaker 3: to anti bullying campaigns and and you know, some of

479
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 3: the sweatshirts say like thank you for being kind or

480
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,320
Speaker 3: you know, just little things like the tag says, I

481
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:20,959
Speaker 3: hope you know how loved you are on the inside.

482
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:25,760
Speaker 2: I have to get you some I can't believe, you know.

483
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,960
Speaker 1: I think messaging makes such a difference. And I think

484
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,679
Speaker 1: about that even when you're thinking, even when you're taking

485
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 1: in social media, even when you're talking to people, every

486
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:37,800
Speaker 1: single word that you use carries energy, it carries power.

487
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 1: And so yeah, the stuff that happens online, I mean,

488
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:43,320
Speaker 1: we could talk about that all day, but I think,

489
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 1: you know, it's a place it just shows that there

490
00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,280
Speaker 1: are so many people who are hurt and they displace

491
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:52,119
Speaker 1: mistake their words towards people They don't deserve it, but

492
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:54,119
Speaker 1: they just need a channel and a vessel to be

493
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:57,400
Speaker 1: able to or out whatever it is within them because

494
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,359
Speaker 1: they haven't managed to figure out how to pro and

495
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:01,600
Speaker 1: release those emotions.

496
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:04,439
Speaker 3: I try to remember that when I got it, you know,

497
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:07,440
Speaker 3: and I'm like, wow, this person is really clearly suffering,

498
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:10,960
Speaker 3: And I try to remember that they're suffering because imagine

499
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 3: saying something nasty to someone you don't know exactly.

500
00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:14,960
Speaker 1: Imagine what it takes to do that.

501
00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:18,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like, that's so I cannot fathom personally, but I

502
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:20,920
Speaker 3: see it so much. I mean, you guys must see

503
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:23,600
Speaker 3: it all the time. And I think a lot of

504
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:28,119
Speaker 3: the time, when you're trying to raise consciousness or put

505
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:31,560
Speaker 3: love and good energy into the world, it's met with

506
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 3: a level of negativity.

507
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've noticed that. Actually, Yes, it's really interesting and

508
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:40,480
Speaker 1: it's really hard. It is, and sometimes, unfortunately, when you

509
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 1: end up trying to share, it's that it's that concept

510
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 1: of when you are one thing, people can sometimes expect

511
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 1: you to be everything. And so if I, for example,

512
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 1: A'm sharing spirituality, people perceive spirituality in the way they

513
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:56,439
Speaker 1: want to perceive it. So if I then do something

514
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,120
Speaker 1: that in their mind feels out of out of context

515
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:02,720
Speaker 1: our relation to their perception of spirituality, it's like, oh,

516
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:05,120
Speaker 1: so you're not really that person, right, you say you're fake,

517
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:08,199
Speaker 1: but actually I was just trying. Yeah, and so like

518
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,399
Speaker 1: so you can share, you share certain parts of yourself,

519
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,280
Speaker 1: but sometimes that can end up being a trap for

520
00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 1: yourself where you you've set a visual of who you

521
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,360
Speaker 1: are and they've absorbed that, and then when you show

522
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 1: a different version or side of yourself. Because everybody can

523
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:26,119
Speaker 1: be all things at once, as we all are, it

524
00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:29,520
Speaker 1: confuses people. So everyone likes things put into boxes, but

525
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:33,840
Speaker 1: actually everything bleeds into each other. You can be scruital

526
00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:36,080
Speaker 1: one day and I could be road raging showering at

527
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 1: you the next. Someone's probably seen me do that, Like

528
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,520
Speaker 1: you call me on a bad day. I had a

529
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:43,480
Speaker 1: bit of anger that day, and it just happens. But

530
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 1: it doesn't stop you from being trying to be a

531
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:47,320
Speaker 1: better person totally.

532
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:52,919
Speaker 3: But yes, yeah, and trying to raise the consciousness of

533
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:56,960
Speaker 3: in some degree. And it's you know, sometimes we're the

534
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:00,840
Speaker 3: mirror that people like really don't want. I have to

535
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 3: remember that, and like going through those experiences being misperceived

536
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:09,480
Speaker 3: or misunderstood is really hard for I really struggle with that.

537
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 1: How do you manage it? Well?

538
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,840
Speaker 3: My clients have helped a lot, because obviously they spend

539
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 3: their entire lives being misunderstood and you know, and you're like,

540
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:21,720
Speaker 3: but what you're saying is like the opposite of who

541
00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:25,120
Speaker 3: that person is. I think what I've learned from them

542
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,200
Speaker 3: is like, as long as I know who I am

543
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:30,919
Speaker 3: and like my inner circle, my husband, my friends, my

544
00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:34,560
Speaker 3: family know who I am and love me and respect me,

545
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,760
Speaker 3: like that's really all that matters. Obviously, some days are

546
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:41,320
Speaker 3: easier than others when there's thousands of comments coming in

547
00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,439
Speaker 3: because they've decided on a Reddit forum, today's the day

548
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:44,880
Speaker 3: they're going.

549
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:45,399
Speaker 1: To bully you.

550
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:49,000
Speaker 3: Oh, I won't Someone told me, I don't even want

551
00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:50,520
Speaker 3: to like put this in the I mean someone a

552
00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:52,720
Speaker 3: read of mine was like, don't read your reddit, you

553
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,760
Speaker 3: won't be well, you know, and like, I don't even

554
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,320
Speaker 3: know what people sometimes say about me, because I can

555
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 3: that way, I can't handle it. I think there is

556
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:03,560
Speaker 3: a lot of misconceptions about me, and I guess I

557
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:06,320
Speaker 3: guess I've had to learn like it's okay, yeah, you know,

558
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:09,080
Speaker 3: and like, it's not my job to run around and

559
00:26:09,160 --> 00:26:14,000
Speaker 3: try to like manage everyone's Yeah, like misperception.

560
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:15,880
Speaker 1: It's a really good book that you might like. It's

561
00:26:15,880 --> 00:26:18,240
Speaker 1: called The Courage to Be Disliked. Oh please, it's a

562
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,159
Speaker 1: brilliant book. I have it. I'll give it to you

563
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:23,040
Speaker 1: after this. It really helped me because I had people

564
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:26,240
Speaker 1: pleasing mentality, and I constantly want people to like me.

565
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:29,399
Speaker 1: I think about people who are from like ten fifteen

566
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:31,720
Speaker 1: years ago that I might have like dat, and I'm like,

567
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:35,320
Speaker 1: I wonder if they still hate me. I want argument

568
00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,240
Speaker 1: with them. I wonder if they still think I'm that person.

569
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:40,960
Speaker 1: You can get really trapped in that, but I you know,

570
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,760
Speaker 1: as I've tried to work my way through it, I've

571
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 1: noticed that the moments where I feel most connected to

572
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 1: myself and what I mean by that is when I

573
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:52,680
Speaker 1: understand who I actually am and what I actually want

574
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:55,919
Speaker 1: in my life. Then the ins and outs of what

575
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:58,639
Speaker 1: other people are saying affects me less. It's almost like

576
00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:02,280
Speaker 1: a tree that's really so in its roots underneath the ground. Yes,

577
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 1: the wind will come, the main will come, like you

578
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:06,920
Speaker 1: don't really get affected by it, But as soon as

579
00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 1: those roots start to shrivel, and you don't nourish them,

580
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,720
Speaker 1: and you don't water them, and you don't keep reminding

581
00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:14,880
Speaker 1: yourself of who you are. Of course, if someone says, well,

582
00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: you're a this, you're gonna be like, wait, maybe I

583
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,199
Speaker 1: am that, because I don't know who I am. So

584
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:21,520
Speaker 1: then I start absorbing what everybody else is saying I

585
00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:24,080
Speaker 1: am because I have absolutely no clue of what it

586
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:25,720
Speaker 1: is that I actually am. Exactly.

587
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:27,760
Speaker 3: I always say it's like staying on the middle of

588
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 3: the surfboard, you know, like just not letting life.

589
00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 2: Throw you off, so you're around.

590
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, and like to your point, Yeah, like maintaining the spirit,

591
00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:42,399
Speaker 3: whatever your spiritual practice is, you know, to be able

592
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:46,679
Speaker 3: to stay firmly rooted or on the middle of the surfboard.

593
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 1: That takes a lot of app work. It takes a.

594
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:52,639
Speaker 3: Lot of work period, you know, like I have my

595
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 3: days where some days it's easier than others.

596
00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:57,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely. Oh my gosh, when I'm on my period,

597
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:59,600
Speaker 1: you can say anything to me about my and I

598
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:04,760
Speaker 1: will leave it. Yeah, it's so true. You mentioned hot break. Yeah,

599
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,840
Speaker 1: you've obviously experienced the dating scene in LA but by

600
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,919
Speaker 1: the time he's coming out, Yeah, I'm glad you haven't.

601
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:16,440
Speaker 4: In in La, but you are married well to be married,

602
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:21,600
Speaker 4: but will very Yeah, how was that process of finding

603
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:22,879
Speaker 4: the person married?

604
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:27,800
Speaker 3: Talk about letting go and letting god. You know, I

605
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:30,639
Speaker 3: was thirty five when I met Zach. I'm turning thirty

606
00:28:30,680 --> 00:28:35,879
Speaker 3: seven right after our wedding, and you know, I was

607
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:37,919
Speaker 3: very focused on work for a very long time, so

608
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:39,880
Speaker 3: I would say until I was thirty, I was very

609
00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:43,760
Speaker 3: much like it'll calm whatever I'm like on my like girl.

610
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 2: Boss thing, like I don't need that right now.

611
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 3: And I definitely put forward that energy for a long

612
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 3: time of like I don't need you, which of course

613
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 3: probably gave me guys who couldn't give me what I

614
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,040
Speaker 3: wanted because I wasn't being clear about my you know,

615
00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 3: desires or like what I really wanted. And then as

616
00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 3: that started to shift, I started to definitely call in

617
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:09,440
Speaker 3: different energy and definitely learn, you know, to heartbreak. I

618
00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 3: went through a breakup probably I don't know, five or

619
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 3: six years ago, and it was like the person that

620
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:18,200
Speaker 3: like I thought was the person and it's only because

621
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:21,080
Speaker 3: he was the greatest reflection of who I wanted to be,

622
00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:25,680
Speaker 3: Like he was such a light and he was such

623
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:27,880
Speaker 3: a beautiful spiritual being.

624
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,600
Speaker 2: I also think I don't know if people believe in past.

625
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:34,120
Speaker 3: Lives, but I do, and I like definitely knew him.

626
00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:37,480
Speaker 3: When I met him, it was like fill me in, Yeah,

627
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 3: exactly what have I missed? Literally it was like and

628
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:45,400
Speaker 3: in retrospect, it was that's probably why the connection felt

629
00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:46,240
Speaker 3: so deep.

630
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:48,680
Speaker 2: It might not have been like in love, but it

631
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,440
Speaker 2: was like I need to finish that a tech harma

632
00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 2: or whatever.

633
00:29:52,360 --> 00:29:55,360
Speaker 3: Like we definitely like just had to have that experience

634
00:29:55,480 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 3: and when it ended, it was so excruciating. But I

635
00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:04,600
Speaker 3: was like so driven by that love to like dig

636
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:08,360
Speaker 3: deeper on myself and I started to do a lot

637
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:11,479
Speaker 3: more inner work and I found my now therapist back then,

638
00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:13,479
Speaker 3: I guess maybe it was like seven years ago, and

639
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 3: he really just took me on a journey, yeah, to

640
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:22,400
Speaker 3: like myself and learning myself and understanding.

641
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:24,200
Speaker 1: Even just the bullying thing, like.

642
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:27,680
Speaker 3: Not even realizing how that was playing a role in

643
00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:31,720
Speaker 3: my adult life, of how I was keeping people away,

644
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 3: you know, and how I was so guarded and that

645
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 3: relationship ending like just shattered like.

646
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 2: All the walls for all of it. And so I'm

647
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:43,360
Speaker 2: so grateful to him.

648
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,560
Speaker 1: I know he knows that that's so nice.

649
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, and like he's you know, married and has a

650
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:51,160
Speaker 3: child and that's beautiful and I, you know, and I'm

651
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:53,120
Speaker 3: so grateful I ended up where I ended up.

652
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:54,560
Speaker 2: It's like so perfect.

653
00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:58,719
Speaker 3: But like that pain, like back to what I had

654
00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:02,400
Speaker 3: said earlier of just sometimes those lowest moments like take

655
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:06,280
Speaker 3: us to the next level, and like I just wanted.

656
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,080
Speaker 2: To be better after that.

657
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 3: And this therapist that I met, doctor Habib Sadiki, who

658
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 3: is the most incredible guy, amazing and he's like he's

659
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:17,480
Speaker 3: also a doctor and he wrote a book called The

660
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:21,960
Speaker 3: Clarity Cleanse, and he's really interesting and has just taken

661
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:24,040
Speaker 3: it to like a whole other place for me.

662
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:26,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm glad you said about therapy. I feel like

663
00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:30,400
Speaker 1: there can be such conflicting views of therapy, but it's

664
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,240
Speaker 1: it's really nice to him when people have such positive

665
00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:36,280
Speaker 1: experiences of it. I can't imagine not really.

666
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 2: No, do you have a therapist.

667
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:41,880
Speaker 1: No, I've done Like no, I've done a few sessions before. Yeah,

668
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:45,120
Speaker 1: but I definitely I've been talking about I really want

669
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:47,080
Speaker 1: to get into it, but I feel like I've had

670
00:31:47,080 --> 00:31:50,080
Speaker 1: a few experiences of therapists that I wasn't connecting.

671
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 2: With got you.

672
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:54,440
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I will say it's a lot of like industry.

673
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 3: You know, I met him through you know whatever, it

674
00:31:57,440 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 3: doesn't matter. But I just think, yeah, it's finding the

675
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:02,600
Speaker 3: right person exactly.

676
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:03,200
Speaker 1: It's like dating.

677
00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:05,640
Speaker 2: It's like dating. Yeah, it's totally not finding the right person.

678
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:08,040
Speaker 3: And by the way, dating back to the dating question,

679
00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:11,280
Speaker 3: like I still like found a narcissist after the good one,

680
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:13,960
Speaker 3: you know, like you still can get like fall for

681
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:16,800
Speaker 3: the love bombing thing. Yeah, it's it's just been such

682
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:19,720
Speaker 3: a journey I think, like, but every person has like

683
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:21,000
Speaker 3: served a purpose.

684
00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:22,200
Speaker 1: And like brought me. Yeah.

685
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:27,360
Speaker 3: And really when I met Zach, I was like totally surrendered.

686
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 3: I was like God, because I wanted it so bad. Yeah,

687
00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:33,600
Speaker 3: at that point that I was like, God, I'm giving

688
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:34,000
Speaker 3: this to you.

689
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:35,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I quit.

690
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:36,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I met him a week later.

691
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:41,240
Speaker 1: No way, where I swear it does take that. Sometimes

692
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 1: you just have.

693
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 2: To take your hands off the wheel sometimes.

694
00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:45,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's trying to control parts of your life that

695
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:49,400
Speaker 1: you can't control. It's exhausting and it gets you no where.

696
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:52,000
Speaker 1: You're still staying in the same place. But yeah, you

697
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:53,200
Speaker 1: let your hands off the wheel.

698
00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:57,360
Speaker 3: And my biggest life lesson, yes, surrender, Yeah, surrender, let go.

699
00:32:57,920 --> 00:33:01,280
Speaker 1: How do you feel you measure success in your life?

700
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: Like what other bromishes, And it can be it can

701
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 1: be in your work, you could be in your personal life.

702
00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:09,960
Speaker 1: But what to you? Because I think it changes over time. Also,

703
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: what right now feels like the areas in your life

704
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:14,600
Speaker 1: that you feel you're measuring your success in.

705
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:17,560
Speaker 3: I think like in my relationship. You know, it was

706
00:33:17,640 --> 00:33:20,440
Speaker 3: something I wanted for so long, and relationships are so

707
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:23,200
Speaker 3: much work, and a lot of my energy has been

708
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 3: put in this relationship and making it work and learning

709
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:31,440
Speaker 3: together and growing together and being challenged by things and

710
00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:32,600
Speaker 3: sticking with it in.

711
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 1: A full time job. Yes, having starting off in a

712
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:37,719
Speaker 1: relationship is another full time job, it is.

713
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:41,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, And so I think, like I think right now,

714
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,680
Speaker 3: I feel like I've won a chapter that you know,

715
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:47,120
Speaker 3: I've wanted for a really long time, and I'm really

716
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:49,000
Speaker 3: excited about what's to come.

717
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:51,120
Speaker 2: And I you know, want to be a mom and.

718
00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:55,120
Speaker 3: I'm looking forward to whatever the next chapter of life is.

719
00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 2: So I think that feels like a win.

720
00:33:57,960 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 1: You know.

721
00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,880
Speaker 3: I love I love obviously what I do, and I

722
00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:06,120
Speaker 3: love when it connects with people. But that's a slippery slope. Yeah,

723
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:10,520
Speaker 3: you know, I think when I'm peaceful is the best.

724
00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly in all areas.

725
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:16,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, and that takes work, it really does.

726
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:19,400
Speaker 1: You mentioned that when you're talking about your assistance, you're like,

727
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:21,880
Speaker 1: you know what it. You either have taste or you

728
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,560
Speaker 1: don't have it, Like it's an eye for things. How

729
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:28,840
Speaker 1: do you balance your idea of what you love? But

730
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,840
Speaker 1: then like obviously all your clients must be so different

731
00:34:31,880 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: when you are styling them, Yeah, how do you balance

732
00:34:35,400 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: their eye versus what you think is accurate in terms

733
00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 1: of fashion and what you would put together, because that

734
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:43,400
Speaker 1: must be a really hard balance.

735
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:47,359
Speaker 3: Every client is very different, like some are very opinionated,

736
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:50,520
Speaker 3: and then others are like I have no idea exactly,

737
00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:53,000
Speaker 3: just sting me. And so I think it's about like

738
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 3: reading the energy of the person. Yeah, you have to

739
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,200
Speaker 3: know when you're pushing too hard, Like you have to

740
00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:00,239
Speaker 3: be able to read the energy of like, Okay, they're

741
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:03,840
Speaker 3: not receptive to this. I yes, that's fine, you know,

742
00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:07,600
Speaker 3: And I think just everyone is different. Some are much easier,

743
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:09,480
Speaker 3: like some just want to come in, try on two

744
00:35:09,480 --> 00:35:10,160
Speaker 3: things and leave.

745
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 2: Others want to be there all day. That's fine.

746
00:35:13,280 --> 00:35:16,200
Speaker 3: It's just like learning each person, I think, and not

747
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:18,759
Speaker 3: trying to Like there was a time where I had

748
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:21,680
Speaker 3: like a lot of like young girls, and I don't

749
00:35:21,719 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 3: want everyone to look the same, you know, like I

750
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:26,400
Speaker 3: want them all to have or I would turn someone

751
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:29,000
Speaker 3: down because I'd be like I already have you know

752
00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:32,080
Speaker 3: like that. I don't want to copy what we're you know,

753
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:36,760
Speaker 3: style is individual. Like I respect the trends or what's

754
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:41,560
Speaker 3: in or what's out or whatever, but like these are individual.

755
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:44,799
Speaker 1: Humans, you know, cloning not into that.

756
00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 2: It's not I'm not the right office.

757
00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:49,520
Speaker 1: If that's what you want. You know, have you found

758
00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:52,080
Speaker 1: it difficult creating meaningful friendships in.

759
00:35:52,080 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 2: The industry, Yes, that's so interesting.

760
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 1: You have friends from childhood or I do not.

761
00:35:56,840 --> 00:36:01,560
Speaker 3: I actually don't have any friends from before my sobriety,

762
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:06,400
Speaker 3: so twenty years forward, I do. But before that, I

763
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:08,439
Speaker 3: was seventeen when I got sober, I was a senior

764
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:09,080
Speaker 3: in high school.

765
00:36:09,719 --> 00:36:11,840
Speaker 2: So much of the program is like stay away from people,

766
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:12,720
Speaker 2: places and things.

767
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:17,640
Speaker 3: I honestly had no like good friends I had all

768
00:36:17,719 --> 00:36:20,560
Speaker 3: the k So you know, I haven't seen those people since,

769
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:24,799
Speaker 3: but since my sobriety, yes I have, and you know

770
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:28,680
Speaker 3: I have. Los Angeles is the problem. I don't know

771
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:32,319
Speaker 3: if it's the industry as much as like, really la

772
00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 3: is tough and like finding your people takes time. It does,

773
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:40,080
Speaker 3: like really took me some time. But I have the

774
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:41,480
Speaker 3: best friends.

775
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:43,040
Speaker 2: I have a tribe.

776
00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:45,560
Speaker 1: It makes all the difference.

777
00:36:45,640 --> 00:36:47,880
Speaker 2: Yeah it's not huge, you know what I mean, But

778
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:48,279
Speaker 2: it's like.

779
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:52,080
Speaker 3: All I need and like I have a ride or

780
00:36:52,160 --> 00:36:55,719
Speaker 3: die friends you know, and I trust them and they

781
00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 3: trust me, and like we are in each other's lives,

782
00:36:58,560 --> 00:36:59,879
Speaker 3: like really in it.

783
00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:00,759
Speaker 2: It's important for me.

784
00:37:01,040 --> 00:37:03,760
Speaker 3: I think our business is hard and it's like nice

785
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,080
Speaker 3: to have Morgan my best friend as a stylist. So

786
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:10,360
Speaker 3: to have someone you know understand what you go literally

787
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,080
Speaker 3: like what you go through is so nice.

788
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 1: It is. I think, you know, community can make or

789
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,800
Speaker 1: break wherever you move or wherever you are. I've noticed

790
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 1: that when I was in New York, I really didn't

791
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,200
Speaker 1: find a community that I could have that feeling with.

792
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:27,000
Speaker 1: And in London, I had all these friends that were

793
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:28,840
Speaker 1: we message each other at like ten and I'll be

794
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,600
Speaker 1: like let's go at dessert, or they'll be there when

795
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:32,920
Speaker 1: I'm crying my eyes out or you know, you have

796
00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 1: those core people and when I've never not had that.

797
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 1: So when I didn't have it in New York, it

798
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:41,840
Speaker 1: broke me. Like I felt like I was not in

799
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:44,120
Speaker 1: the place I was supposed to be. I wasn't enjoying

800
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:47,480
Speaker 1: my days there. It became a struggle, not because I'd moved,

801
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:49,800
Speaker 1: but because I didn't find people that I could spend

802
00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:53,480
Speaker 1: those moments with. Then I moved to La. We created

803
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:57,480
Speaker 1: this beautiful community that we cherish so much that we

804
00:37:57,600 --> 00:38:00,439
Speaker 1: invest into that invest back into us. Yeah, and it's

805
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:02,560
Speaker 1: made La, which I never thought it would, but it's

806
00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:06,239
Speaker 1: made it feel like home and so people people all home.

807
00:38:06,280 --> 00:38:10,880
Speaker 3: You know. It's our deepest human nature. It's how we

808
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:14,840
Speaker 3: survived though as like cave men, like the like lone

809
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 3: guy would die, but the crew would live because they

810
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 3: would protect each other, and like the moms would like

811
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:24,880
Speaker 3: feed each other's babies, like we it's so deep in

812
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 3: our nature to be in community and be like received

813
00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:30,120
Speaker 3: by people.

814
00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:31,000
Speaker 1: I think that's.

815
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:33,839
Speaker 2: Why realizing like as you know, the bullying.

816
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:36,280
Speaker 1: Like being cast out as a little.

817
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:39,320
Speaker 3: Kid is like it's so like jarring your system because

818
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:41,799
Speaker 3: we need to be and not everyone does.

819
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:44,319
Speaker 2: Like my my fiance, I guess he's my husband. By

820
00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:44,879
Speaker 2: the time you guys.

821
00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:48,160
Speaker 3: See, he doesn't need friends the way that I need friends.

822
00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:51,120
Speaker 3: Noone's different maybe, and it's a boy and girl thing too.

823
00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:52,279
Speaker 2: I kind of think it is.

824
00:38:52,600 --> 00:38:55,200
Speaker 1: I think so I know it. Girls like have this

825
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:58,919
Speaker 1: desire to just connect and I think more often and

826
00:38:58,960 --> 00:38:59,960
Speaker 1: in more of an emotional way.

827
00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:01,520
Speaker 2: Yes' fine totally.

828
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:04,160
Speaker 1: But that's so nice that you've maintained such deep friendships.

829
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:05,840
Speaker 2: The industry part, though, is tricky.

830
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:07,920
Speaker 3: Like, you know, you might have a client who has

831
00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:10,080
Speaker 3: the same let's just say, like hair and makeup people

832
00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 3: for years, and then the client goes away and then

833
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:14,400
Speaker 3: all of a sudden, you don't hear from those people anymore,

834
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:16,719
Speaker 3: and you're like, wait, I thought we were a friends, Yes,

835
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:20,600
Speaker 3: but we're not. Okay, noted and that's fine. But I

836
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:24,719
Speaker 3: think moving forward, you start to really realize you know

837
00:39:24,760 --> 00:39:25,200
Speaker 3: who your.

838
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:27,319
Speaker 1: People are and who they are in different cycles for

839
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:27,960
Speaker 1: different things.

840
00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:30,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you want to connect, but it's like those

841
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:32,960
Speaker 3: aren't going to be the people that you call when

842
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:36,240
Speaker 3: like times get tough, you know, But it's very confusing

843
00:39:36,239 --> 00:39:40,000
Speaker 3: because you do spend huge chunks of time sometimes with

844
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:43,680
Speaker 3: these people and you go through life life is happening

845
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:47,719
Speaker 3: with them exactly. It's a very false sense of like, oh,

846
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:52,080
Speaker 3: you were in this together. We're not we're paid to

847
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:54,560
Speaker 3: all be here. We're just here for right now.

848
00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:56,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a seasonal community.

849
00:39:56,320 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 2: Yeah that's fine services p. But it's not real. Those

850
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 2: are not my you know, my people.

851
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:08,720
Speaker 1: What what emotion do you find difficult to digest or handle?

852
00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:10,920
Speaker 1: Do you have any emotions that you find difficult to

853
00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 1: That's a good question.

854
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 2: I think, like extreme anger is hard for me.

855
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:20,400
Speaker 1: How do you how do you how do you express anger? Well?

856
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:21,480
Speaker 1: How did it come out of you?

857
00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:25,840
Speaker 3: Well, it doesn't as much anymore because because it was

858
00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:30,840
Speaker 3: my go to emotion for so long, I now almost

859
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:33,279
Speaker 3: like have a hard time accessing it because I've like

860
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:34,919
Speaker 3: done so much work on my life.

861
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 2: I'm almost like so ripped open now that I like

862
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:38,720
Speaker 2: it's hard.

863
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:41,160
Speaker 3: Like I went through a really tough thing last year

864
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:43,240
Speaker 3: and my therapist kept being like, come on, get angry

865
00:40:43,239 --> 00:40:44,720
Speaker 3: with me, and I would be like, I can't.

866
00:40:44,719 --> 00:40:47,120
Speaker 2: I'm just sad. I'm just sad.

867
00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:49,120
Speaker 1: Well, then do you say the anger is a secondary

868
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:52,200
Speaker 1: emotion exactly? So it's not the real, it's not it's

869
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:54,920
Speaker 1: a build up. So the fact that you keep releasing

870
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:58,440
Speaker 1: and letting things go Anger comes when you harness and

871
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,360
Speaker 1: hold onto things too much. And so whether it's sadness,

872
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:05,480
Speaker 1: whether it's disappointment, it's actually the build up of those

873
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:09,000
Speaker 1: things that create the response being anger. It's never anger

874
00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:10,480
Speaker 1: is the primary emotion.

875
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,160
Speaker 3: Exactly, And I think because I've done a lot of

876
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 3: work on that, it's like not my go to anymore.

877
00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 3: And so when I'm when someone comes at me with anger,

878
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh my god, you are.

879
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:22,560
Speaker 2: Not dealing with the real thing, you know, like you

880
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:24,440
Speaker 2: need to like really do some diggings.

881
00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, it's not about this, you know.

882
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:29,759
Speaker 3: I think I also really stuffer with people who can't

883
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:33,319
Speaker 3: take accountability or like victims of life, because I just

884
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:39,120
Speaker 3: feel like, I don't know, Yeah, life is giving you,

885
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:43,440
Speaker 3: exactly the curriculum that you need to learn and grow

886
00:41:43,520 --> 00:41:44,200
Speaker 3: and be better.

887
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:47,239
Speaker 2: You are not a victim to your ex husband or

888
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:49,800
Speaker 2: your you know, job or whatever.

889
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:54,040
Speaker 3: Like we all have the opportunity to change and like

890
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:58,880
Speaker 3: take control of our lives. And like, obviously obviously there

891
00:41:58,880 --> 00:42:01,440
Speaker 3: are victims. It's not what I'm talking about, you know.

892
00:42:01,840 --> 00:42:05,319
Speaker 3: I'm talking about someone who's every everything is everyone else's font.

893
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:08,480
Speaker 2: Yes, you know, Yes, I have a hard time with that.

894
00:42:08,719 --> 00:42:11,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. I think that there's so many times

895
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:15,440
Speaker 1: that that's the easier option though, Like it's so much easier. Yeah,

896
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:18,560
Speaker 1: you know what everybody else except for me, because if

897
00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:20,360
Speaker 1: they're the problem and I'm not, then I don't have

898
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:21,200
Speaker 1: to work exactly.

899
00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:23,200
Speaker 2: I don't have to look at myself one hundred percent.

900
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,160
Speaker 1: It's like ignorance.

901
00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:27,960
Speaker 2: Is probably bliss. I wish I could.

902
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,040
Speaker 3: I don't know, I've gone too far down the therapy

903
00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:32,839
Speaker 3: hole where I just like I can't gone.

904
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 1: Are you a crier?

905
00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 2: Are you God?

906
00:42:36,800 --> 00:42:38,040
Speaker 3: Yes? Are you me?

907
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:42,160
Speaker 1: Oh? Yes? I cry through every every every release of

908
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:46,799
Speaker 1: emotion for me, whether it's happiness, sadness, anger, frustration, it

909
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:50,600
Speaker 1: comes out in tears. And I really appreciate that because

910
00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:53,120
Speaker 1: it comes quick and then it flows and it goes.

911
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:58,520
Speaker 1: But I definitely, yeah, I really appreciate the process of

912
00:42:58,560 --> 00:42:59,920
Speaker 1: releasing my emotions through.

913
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:03,440
Speaker 3: It's so healthy. Yeah, and you know, it's like so great.

914
00:43:03,920 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 3: Megan Fox always jokes that she like cries in the shower.

915
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:08,680
Speaker 2: Oh, it's the same thing, good bad.

916
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,279
Speaker 3: You know, it's just her way to like release, and

917
00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:14,520
Speaker 3: you know, sometimes it's just you gotta like get it

918
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:15,320
Speaker 3: out of your body.

919
00:43:15,400 --> 00:43:17,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, I sometimes wish.

920
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:20,080
Speaker 3: Sometimes I have a harder time accessing it, and then

921
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:22,040
Speaker 3: other times it'll just just come.

922
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:23,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.

923
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:28,080
Speaker 1: I've got some quick fire questions. You great, okay? Favorite

924
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:29,720
Speaker 1: affordable places to shop?

925
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:30,359
Speaker 3: Oh?

926
00:43:30,640 --> 00:43:31,200
Speaker 1: Good question?

927
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,880
Speaker 3: Well, Aritzia love. Yeah, they should pay me, by the way,

928
00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:36,239
Speaker 3: like always plug them?

929
00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 2: Do you? I just think they're great?

930
00:43:37,680 --> 00:43:40,080
Speaker 3: Okay, great, I think is great. I think Zara can

931
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:43,320
Speaker 3: be great. What else do I love? I mean anything

932
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:45,440
Speaker 3: on a Revolve. I don't know if that's like affordable, but.

933
00:43:45,640 --> 00:43:48,040
Speaker 1: I really think it is. I find Yeah, Revolves got

934
00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: some good stuff.

935
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 3: There's some really good stuff on Revolves, and I do

936
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,080
Speaker 3: a lot of work with them, and I just think

937
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:54,360
Speaker 3: that they have like great brands, great quality.

938
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:57,880
Speaker 2: I'm a big Revolve girly right, yeah, I love those.

939
00:43:58,320 --> 00:44:00,799
Speaker 1: What's trending right now that you and is it a

940
00:44:00,840 --> 00:44:04,880
Speaker 1: trend that you saw it? That's funny.

941
00:44:05,280 --> 00:44:07,960
Speaker 3: I mean I think the like the off duty like

942
00:44:08,040 --> 00:44:14,520
Speaker 3: cool girl saying is yeah, it's kind of I started, Okay,

943
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:14,920
Speaker 3: give me.

944
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:15,359
Speaker 2: What, give me?

945
00:44:15,440 --> 00:44:17,759
Speaker 1: Give me what the outfit looks like? What's cool girl off?

946
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:21,319
Speaker 3: Do you know it's probably baggy jeans, some cool sneakers,

947
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:26,960
Speaker 3: little jewelry, not what I'm wearing. Yeah, exactly, I me

948
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:28,840
Speaker 3: not their shirt. This is I was trying to, you know,

949
00:44:28,920 --> 00:44:31,200
Speaker 3: be a little more. It's funny. I'm in a funny

950
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 3: age like era of life where I'm like in this

951
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:37,360
Speaker 3: in between like I'm a stepmother, I'm a you know,

952
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:40,280
Speaker 3: Palisades girl, like I'm thirty.

953
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:43,200
Speaker 2: I'm literally like, who am I? Right now?

954
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:46,040
Speaker 3: I'm going through a weird moment for sure, because I'm

955
00:44:46,040 --> 00:44:49,400
Speaker 3: like trying to grapple with like my age. And but

956
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:52,720
Speaker 3: I did I still feel like a cool, young hot girl.

957
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:57,080
Speaker 1: You definitely are. You're still not. Thanks, Okay, what trends

958
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:58,719
Speaker 1: are you really disliking right now?

959
00:44:59,239 --> 00:44:59,839
Speaker 4: Oh?

960
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:00,759
Speaker 1: You know?

961
00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 3: The capris are coming back? And I'm curious, Okay, I'm curious.

962
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:05,759
Speaker 3: It's like you could style them.

963
00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:06,480
Speaker 1: I probably could.

964
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:08,799
Speaker 3: I think it's body type, Like I'm such a dress

965
00:45:08,840 --> 00:45:11,880
Speaker 3: for your body type kind of person. And like I think, obviously,

966
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:14,040
Speaker 3: if you're tall and skinny, you're gonna look great in

967
00:45:14,120 --> 00:45:16,960
Speaker 3: a capri because it's cutting your leg in a funny place,

968
00:45:17,880 --> 00:45:20,160
Speaker 3: you know. So if you have short legs, that's gonna

969
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:23,839
Speaker 3: just cut you off. So if you care about that,

970
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:26,880
Speaker 3: you know, that's something to think about. I guess I don't.

971
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:31,920
Speaker 2: Love the like young girls dressing old. I don't love it.

972
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:36,840
Speaker 3: I appreciate like classic obviously and sophisticated, but I think like,

973
00:45:37,080 --> 00:45:39,160
Speaker 3: as a thirty seven year old, I'm like, you have

974
00:45:39,239 --> 00:45:43,359
Speaker 3: your whole adult life to dress like that. You are

975
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:47,400
Speaker 3: twenty three, Like live your life, yeah, like show the belly,

976
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:51,040
Speaker 3: yeah right whatever it is, Like, I just some of

977
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 3: these young girls are just aging up a little bit,

978
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:54,800
Speaker 3: and I just it's not my favorite.

979
00:45:54,960 --> 00:45:56,839
Speaker 1: A best tip for a tool girl that's trying to

980
00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:59,520
Speaker 1: pick appropriate clothing for her, Like you.

981
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:03,000
Speaker 3: Was real the easiest Everything is good on them, okay,

982
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:07,120
Speaker 3: Hall and Than is like it's a joke. Everything looks

983
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:10,439
Speaker 3: good on them. Yeah, you know what I mean, it's okay.

984
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:14,040
Speaker 1: What about if someone is shorter and struggles with cuts,

985
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,719
Speaker 1: Like what's the best cut for somebody who's.

986
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:18,600
Speaker 3: Well, if you're shorter and you want to like lengths

987
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:21,239
Speaker 3: in your legs, you want like a like a high

988
00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:26,439
Speaker 3: waisted probably on your waist, like high waisted with sort

989
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:28,400
Speaker 3: of like a like a straight leg.

990
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:31,240
Speaker 2: That's going to help with the leg. It's all about

991
00:46:31,239 --> 00:46:32,360
Speaker 2: where you bring the eye to.

992
00:46:32,560 --> 00:46:35,920
Speaker 3: So if you have you know, a high like high

993
00:46:35,960 --> 00:46:38,000
Speaker 3: waisted with a belt and then you do kind of

994
00:46:38,040 --> 00:46:38,839
Speaker 3: what I'm doing right now.

995
00:46:38,880 --> 00:46:40,239
Speaker 2: You're bringing the eye up.

996
00:46:42,719 --> 00:46:45,200
Speaker 1: That's pretty that's pretty cool. I feel like there's such

997
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:48,239
Speaker 1: a science to it a little bit. Yeah, helps, it's

998
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:48,759
Speaker 1: just my eye.

999
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 2: I just need to be in the room with somebody.

1000
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:51,680
Speaker 2: And then I'm like, ah, God, we.

1001
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:57,080
Speaker 1: Only we only need one of you, and I thank

1002
00:46:57,120 --> 00:46:58,759
Speaker 1: you so much for this. What are you reading right now,

1003
00:46:58,800 --> 00:46:59,920
Speaker 1: by the way, Oh, I just.

1004
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 3: Read what's the book that Oprah just wrote with the

1005
00:47:02,520 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 3: guy about happiness?

1006
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:05,520
Speaker 2: What's it called Bill the Life you Want?

1007
00:47:05,560 --> 00:47:05,680
Speaker 1: Oh?

1008
00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:07,879
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm reading Build of Life you Want?

1009
00:47:08,200 --> 00:47:09,200
Speaker 1: And then it's funny.

1010
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:11,960
Speaker 3: It was like it was like simple practical tools, all

1011
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:13,400
Speaker 3: things I've known before.

1012
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:14,640
Speaker 2: Or there Brooks and Oprah.

1013
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:16,879
Speaker 3: Okay, they came together and they like did this book

1014
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:18,400
Speaker 3: and it's nothing.

1015
00:47:18,040 --> 00:47:20,920
Speaker 2: That I haven't heard before. It was very basic in

1016
00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:21,480
Speaker 2: that sense.

1017
00:47:21,560 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 1: But if I don't know, it was like perfect until

1018
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:26,839
Speaker 1: the still remind us that you need every single day gratitude.

1019
00:47:27,360 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 3: Like if you can just get into gratitude every day,

1020
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 3: no matter when the going gets tough, if you're having

1021
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:34,520
Speaker 3: the worst day, if you can just sit and think

1022
00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:37,239
Speaker 3: of five things that you're grateful for how that just

1023
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:39,880
Speaker 3: little bit of perception can shift.

1024
00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:41,239
Speaker 1: It's a whole day, the whole day.

1025
00:47:41,680 --> 00:47:43,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, what are you reading right now?

1026
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:46,640
Speaker 1: I'm reading Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway? Ooh love,

1027
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:49,719
Speaker 1: Okay have you read that? Oh my gosh, it is

1028
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:53,360
Speaker 1: a brilliant book. I highly recommend it. It really helps

1029
00:47:53,360 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 1: you to figure out why you have the perceptions you

1030
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: have over yourself. But also that's so kiss so much

1031
00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:00,600
Speaker 1: about people think.

1032
00:48:00,480 --> 00:48:02,000
Speaker 2: Have you done the Hoffin process yet?

1033
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 1: No? Have you? Yes? Is it amazing? Yes? Okay, I

1034
00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:10,000
Speaker 1: really wanted life changing, life change. Three friends that are

1035
00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:12,360
Speaker 1: going to do it life changing Okay.

1036
00:48:12,560 --> 00:48:15,480
Speaker 3: I just like wow, like what we get from our

1037
00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:18,839
Speaker 3: parents and how those patterns.

1038
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:21,719
Speaker 1: Like follow up genetics as well change it.

1039
00:48:21,880 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 3: Literally like I would not be in my relationship if

1040
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:27,920
Speaker 3: it wasn't. It really helped me see what was holding

1041
00:48:27,960 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 3: me back from healthy love.

1042
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:32,600
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm going to do that. Yeah, what are you

1043
00:48:32,680 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 1: most excited about? Well, I've kind of known that right now,

1044
00:48:35,080 --> 00:48:38,640
Speaker 1: But what are you most excited about right now? I

1045
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:39,760
Speaker 1: know excited.

1046
00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:43,239
Speaker 2: I'm just excited about a whole wife.

1047
00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:45,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I just I've worked so hard to get

1048
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:47,960
Speaker 3: to my man, you know, and I just feel so

1049
00:48:48,239 --> 00:48:50,920
Speaker 3: grateful and we've worked really hard at our relationship, you know,

1050
00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:55,760
Speaker 3: so I feel like I'm excited for a like marriage,

1051
00:48:55,800 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 3: a partnership, and god willing a child.

1052
00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:03,840
Speaker 1: Yeah all around. Well, thank you for being here with

1053
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:08,280
Speaker 1: this conversation. So magical and I like cannot wait to

1054
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 1: see how your life changes and expands beyond your imagination.

1055
00:49:12,280 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 3: Oh thanks s gotcha, Thanks for having me, Thanks for

1056
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:20,480
Speaker 3: like putting good vibes in the world. You and your husband,

1057
00:49:20,560 --> 00:49:23,400
Speaker 3: It's like we need more of it, just more and

1058
00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:24,399
Speaker 3: more and more. Yeah.

1059
00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:27,880
Speaker 1: Well never, I am just on the way trying our best.