Speaker 1: So this is like the Lorial Midnight Cream video I did,
Speaker 1: only the podcast edition. I've got two stunning supermodel dogs
Speaker 1: and we're on me wearing Tory Bark sweatshirts. I have
Speaker 1: a caviar sweatshirt. I have not brushed my teeth, but
Speaker 1: I have not gotten dressed. I've been stressed and moving
Speaker 1: and I'm dehydrated as fuck. And that's actually bad. When
Speaker 1: I get really dehydrated, it gets bad, like I go
Speaker 1: too far and then I got a headache and my
Speaker 1: body aches. I'm a fucking mess. Let's just put it
Speaker 1: that way. My friend Mark, Hi, Mark, Mark's definitely listening.
Speaker 1: He just said to me. He called me, and I
Speaker 1: was like, I gotta go. I'm walking into the podcast.
Speaker 1: I said. I'm standing here in a caviar sweatshirt, have
Speaker 1: brush my teeth yet, but this podcast that you love,
Speaker 1: I'm walking into right now. He goes, well, you're the
Speaker 1: Jackson Pollock of podcasts. You just what with a minute?
Speaker 1: You want to paint? You have to paint. So I
Speaker 1: guess right now is when I'm going to paint. Okay,
Speaker 1: So let's discuss a couple of things. First, gay men
Speaker 1: are a different breed in the last twelve hours, two
Speaker 1: different gay men have told me different activities as it
Speaker 1: pertains to furniture. So one of my friends told me
Speaker 1: that they had to let me know about this f
Speaker 1: one event that I was going to invite them to,
Speaker 1: which is a coveted ticket that I can bring one
Speaker 1: person and people would pay thousands of dollars to get
Speaker 1: to go. And he said he's probably going to be
Speaker 1: able to make it, but he has to let me
Speaker 1: know because there's a rug he ordered coming in from Catman.
Speaker 1: Do Catman, do you know my rugs are coming in
Speaker 1: from fucking either rugs dot com? Actually, I do have
Speaker 1: some stark rugs because that's elite. I can't wait till
Speaker 1: they get peed on and then I have to call
Speaker 1: him crying and like I have to get another one
Speaker 1: and ask for friends and faimily discount or My other
Speaker 1: thing that I do is when I buy a rug
Speaker 1: this is a rich person's bullshit thing, I get two
Speaker 1: because I know these fucking beasts are gonna pee on it.
Speaker 1: But anyway, my friend is getting back to me because
Speaker 1: he's got to get a rug from Catman. Do are
Speaker 1: you a fucking that is like such a gay eighties
Speaker 1: thing like guys, everything's made in the same fucking places.
Speaker 1: I don't know is there, but I don't know, all right,
Speaker 1: so let's just not judge him. He is a rug
Speaker 1: from Catman do I used to have seventy Arama's bags,
Speaker 1: so he can judge me too. Catman don't Catman do's
Speaker 1: and don't then my other friend, Yeah, catman, he's not
Speaker 1: a catman or a dog man because one animal near
Speaker 1: that rug. I don't think I'm ever going over to
Speaker 1: his house. I really don't. I don't want to, like
Speaker 1: a little little shard of like candy coated Swedish candy
Speaker 1: and Christmas is canceled. I don't want to go there,
Speaker 1: never bringing my dogs. I don't know their dog passed
Speaker 1: away sadly years ago, but this is probably why they
Speaker 1: can now have a Catman do rug. My other gay friend.
Speaker 1: And by the way, I'm selling my house what I
Speaker 1: designed with my rugs from these websites, and I'm selling
Speaker 1: it for double what I paid. And these guys have
Speaker 1: never sold the house for double what they paid. Is
Speaker 1: that true? Yes? But over years, over like tens of years.
Speaker 1: So I'm going with my model. I'm going with my model,
Speaker 1: because it's not like, oh I didn't get the Catman
Speaker 1: do rug and like that is why my house never
Speaker 1: like increased in value because I'm a cheap fuck. But
Speaker 1: as I've said to you before, I'm designing it. Oh,
Speaker 1: I have to tell you another story, all right? Hold on.
Speaker 1: So my second friend Mark, the one who listens to
Speaker 1: this podcast and says, I'm the Jackson Pollock of podcasts
Speaker 1: because I have to like paint when I want to paint,
Speaker 1: whether I brush my teeth or not. He just said
Speaker 1: to me that he was near the airport he had
Speaker 1: to dry. I wasn't even paying attention. It was scot
Speaker 1: so convoluted, but like something about bought two chairs at auction,
Speaker 1: then had to wanted to go to get them recovered,
Speaker 1: and then was driving to go pick them up like children,
Speaker 1: like a carpool for car. I was like, are you
Speaker 1: fucking kidding me? The other gay that lives down the
Speaker 1: street from you last night was waiting for a Catman
Speaker 1: do flight. It's like a breeder dog. It's like, we
Speaker 1: want rescue dogs, not breeder dogs. We want rescue rugs.
Speaker 1: Like he's fucking at the airport waiting for a breeder rug.
Speaker 1: Right now, like people are fucking crazy, including myself, So
Speaker 1: let me get into my story. So I'm moving, as
Speaker 1: you know, and two things are happening. One is people
Speaker 1: like to play fuck around and find out with me,
Speaker 1: and fewer people play it, but people still want in
Speaker 1: a while play it, and they do fucking find out,
Speaker 1: whether it's today or ten years from today, they fucking
Speaker 1: find out. So this thing was, I've done probably ten renovations,
Speaker 1: and you would think everyone thinks that, like she's famous
Speaker 1: or she's rich or whatever people think of me. It's
Speaker 1: hard to even know Skinny Girl Forbes Magazine that I
Speaker 1: don't pay attention. Okay, now I don't pay every attention
Speaker 1: to every single thing, but I'm very good at understanding price,
Speaker 1: like what something should act actually cost. I actually fucked
Speaker 1: up when I was on the apprentice on QVC because
Speaker 1: I knew the price to begin with, but I second
Speaker 1: guessed myself because what we should charge because I didn't
Speaker 1: I underestimated the wealth of the QVC customer at the time.
Speaker 1: But anyway, because their number one zip codes at the
Speaker 1: time were Beverly Hills and Upper east Side, I did
Speaker 1: not know that. But I'm very good at like what
Speaker 1: something should cost. I'm also a guard rails all in person.
Speaker 1: I've learned my lesson. Okay, someone right now is trying
Speaker 1: to play fuck around and find out. They got a
Speaker 1: permit for a pool for me for a house and
Speaker 1: been working on the permits at the city and it
Speaker 1: takes a year and it's a hard thing. Twenty thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: This has nothing to do with the pool, just the permits.
Speaker 1: Another company took a deposit to do the pool. We
Speaker 1: did some drawings, but we never did the pool. Thirty
Speaker 1: three thousand. They want to keep that and not give
Speaker 1: it back, like, okay, fuck around, find out, so keeping
Speaker 1: it moving. I told the designer for this new house
Speaker 1: that I bought what my budget was, and this is
Speaker 1: a much bigger budget than I would proportionally to what
Speaker 1: this house needs. Meaning in the Hampton's, in my house,
Speaker 1: I needed like a really substantial, almost full gut. Okay,
Speaker 1: in Connecticut, I didn't need a full gut. It was
Speaker 1: a half renovation, but a big property. So you're talking
Speaker 1: about indoor outdoor, apple trees, guest cottages, entertainment, barns, et cetera.
Speaker 1: So I have a baseline of what things should cost
Speaker 1: also I could move every couple of years. I got
Speaker 1: a daughter leaving for college. We've had a lot of
Speaker 1: life changes. So I always design this way add value
Speaker 1: to the home, Like if it's two things, one to
Speaker 1: the materials of the home, Like not because you think
Speaker 1: this veiny marble is gonna like that's not it. They
Speaker 1: may not like that. It's a taste specific thing. But
Speaker 1: like if you decide to put stone on an island
Speaker 1: that didn't have it, or you make the kitchen bigger,
Speaker 1: or you walk in and now you can see out
Speaker 1: to the yard through a window, like the experience is
Speaker 1: different because of it, not because of your personal choice
Speaker 1: that you have imposed on someone else. Meeting, I have
Speaker 1: a bedroom upstairs that is now a full glamor room
Speaker 1: with a marble island. I don't know who's moving in here.
Speaker 1: I don't know that she's gonna want to walk down
Speaker 1: the hall and have a separate room that has a
Speaker 1: full bathroom and a steam. And you know, maybe I
Speaker 1: found the right buyer because we're you know, I've put
Speaker 1: a lot of money into this house and I'm getting
Speaker 1: double my money. And I also stole it when I
Speaker 1: bought it, and I bought it right and great, But
Speaker 1: I'm saying I'm that was for me. I wanted that.
Speaker 1: That was not that's not something that someone else would
Speaker 1: necessarily want. You can't just impose because you're, you know,
Speaker 1: a rich bitch or fancy that someone else is gonna
Speaker 1: want it. But if it's really going to change the
Speaker 1: way the house feels, and like the value of the house,
Speaker 1: you know, like you upgraded appliances, that's in value. Add
Speaker 1: you have automatic window treatments everywhere, or it used to
Speaker 1: be the sound system, like whatever the thing is. You know,
Speaker 1: you redid the kitchen floors and you maybe just stain them.
Speaker 1: You don't even have to rip them out. It was
Speaker 1: not expensive, but the visual, like, it's the experience and
Speaker 1: the convenience. The other person doesn't have to do that.
Speaker 1: You changed all the hardware. Now someone comes to look
Speaker 1: at the house, it all looks fresh. Okay, these are
Speaker 1: things people just don't want to deal with, and it's
Speaker 1: worth it. Okay, but I don't care about viscouch, that chair,
Speaker 1: that thing, et cetera. I'll buy nice things, but I
Speaker 1: have always left them and sold them in an auction
Speaker 1: when I leave the house. So like, and I also
Speaker 1: count that in the renovation price because it's going in
Speaker 1: the garbage. Meaning if I want to go do a
Speaker 1: house and you're like, it's going to be one hundred
Speaker 1: and two five hundred million dollars, I count what the
Speaker 1: furniture is gonna cost. That's part of my all because
Speaker 1: I know I'm not getting that back. If you spend
Speaker 1: one hundred thousand of furniture, you're getting ten back. Like
Speaker 1: it's just not. So that's why I'm crazy about when
Speaker 1: I buy the furniture. Now, someone who is going to
Speaker 1: pick up their rug from catman, do you know, maybe
Speaker 1: that rug comes to the next house, But if it
Speaker 1: gets wrecked and dirty in this house, which it probably will,
Speaker 1: then it won't. But there's nothing, no criticism. Everyone lives
Speaker 1: how they want. You know. Some people keep their Arimez
Speaker 1: bags and boxes so they're pristine for a future person.
Speaker 1: Some people, like you know, the Olsen Twins, beat the
Speaker 1: shit out of them because they're to be worn. Like.
Speaker 1: So it depends on who you are and what you're
Speaker 1: doing or what your goals are. Do whatever the fuck
Speaker 1: you want. But and I do believe saving a bag
Speaker 1: and things like it's probably stupid, even though I do
Speaker 1: do it outfits, et cetera, where your shit. We could
Speaker 1: all be dead tomorrow and it doesn't matter, Like just
Speaker 1: put it on, use it like you're saving for a
Speaker 1: rainy day that may never come, and it's just like
Speaker 1: not living so anyway, So I know what it costs
Speaker 1: to do a house and all the furniture. So I
Speaker 1: gave a cap this property that is about an eighth
Speaker 1: the size of the property that I'm on now, and
Speaker 1: the house is about a third. And I gave a
Speaker 1: half the budget that I did on the house that
Speaker 1: I'm in now, which is crazy because I did a
Speaker 1: massive renovation at a huge place, and so within that budget,
Speaker 1: a closet person came and literally sent an invoice for
Speaker 1: half the price of the entire renovation, which is the
Speaker 1: quarter of the price to renovate an entire Greenwich, Connecticut property.
Speaker 1: So what did I do? I was like, this is insane,
Speaker 1: and of course it's always quote unquote a starting point,
Speaker 1: and then they get scared and I'm like, but no,
Speaker 1: this is a fucking insane price. I won't tell you
Speaker 1: guys what it was. I don't think I can. You'd
Speaker 1: never speak to me again, Like these are things that
Speaker 1: I won't do because I know where the line is,
Speaker 1: and this is the line of like, we can't relate
Speaker 1: to her, she's a fucking loser. Okay, it's not a
Speaker 1: price we can discuss, it's a lot. So I go.
Speaker 1: And now I'm a due diligence person. So whenever I
Speaker 1: get a quote from like a house manager or something
Speaker 1: like that's crazy, like that stupid twenty thousand dollars pool
Speaker 1: permit thing, I'll send it to three people, one house
Speaker 1: manager in the Hamptons, a contractor, a city person, a
Speaker 1: real estate worker, and i'll do all crowdsource. Then i'll
Speaker 1: know where we stand. So they all say you out
Speaker 1: of your fucking mind, Like I know that this guy's
Speaker 1: hosing me. Also, this guy's hosed me before on something
Speaker 1: because I was getting a gate and I did the
Speaker 1: same process. Then I'm like, I have three people telling
Speaker 1: me this other price, no fucking way, So we're all
Speaker 1: getting ripped off. It's just how much. Okay, So the
Speaker 1: closet thing, I now call the guy who did my
Speaker 1: other closets because to me, in my mind, I'm like,
Speaker 1: just closets people are closet people. Okay, I send it
Speaker 1: to my closet guy. And I'm wrong to say closet
Speaker 1: people are closet people because a lot of these places
Speaker 1: are like brand name closet places, like the Closet Place
Speaker 1: and then the Blind's Place, and then you know that
Speaker 1: the Closet Place is like a franchise thing, and like
Speaker 1: they're just like salespeople and a big company that you're
Speaker 1: paying a massive viig two and then they're gonna go
Speaker 1: get their designer and then they're gonna go get the
Speaker 1: people to build it. It's like a lot of bulk
Speaker 1: in between, right, It's like the opposite of like Amazon,
Speaker 1: and even Amazon has bulk in between. It's the opposite
Speaker 1: of like who's making it? So I call the guy
Speaker 1: from the hampton just to be like, who are you?
Speaker 1: What's your model? Because he did my house in the
Speaker 1: Hampton's and he did my place in the city and
Speaker 1: it's always seemed like pricey but not like kill yourself.
Speaker 1: And he's like, I'm like, you build it. He's like,
Speaker 1: my guys build it. But it's like his guys and
Speaker 1: they don't do houses and things, they only do closets.
Speaker 1: So he's got like a corner on just doing it
Speaker 1: and a lot of the other people, the closet place,
Speaker 1: the closet lady, they use him, So now I'm paying
Speaker 1: them to use him when I know him and he
Speaker 1: can do it himself. And my friend was gonna do
Speaker 1: the same thing with our contractor. She's like, I just
Speaker 1: gave him the drawings and he's gonna do it himself. Now,
Speaker 1: some people may not understand every inch of a closet
Speaker 1: and the way things are, but it's not rocket science, Okay,
Speaker 1: It's squares and lights and handles. So he says to me,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do this for you for one one almost
Speaker 1: one third the price. Like let's say he's doing it
Speaker 1: for he's doing it for less than half the price.
Speaker 1: He's doing it like yeah, like thirty percent. So I'm like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck. So now my two friends it happened
Speaker 1: to also be doing houses at the same exact time,
Speaker 1: who also happened to be using the same designer. They
Speaker 1: start freaking out because I'm like, guys, like, it doesn't matter,
Speaker 1: I'm not shooting a messenger. You recommended me. This designer's wonderful.
Speaker 1: I love her. I'll tell you goes who she is.
Speaker 1: Later she referred me to these people and I guess
Speaker 1: down in Florida, people just getting hosed everywhere. I don't
Speaker 1: know why, but these two are now pulling from the
Speaker 1: other closet person. So now that closet person plus three
Speaker 1: people right now, as and my guy just gained three people.
Speaker 1: So now I'm like in the closet business, and now
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get a better deal because I just brought
Speaker 1: him to other people too. I'm like, no, don't fuck up,
Speaker 1: because he's gonna fly down to Florida to me and
Speaker 1: me I go listen, I'll get you to other people.
Speaker 1: It's like there have been times where a massage therapists.
Speaker 1: I'm like, can you come an hour, But don't worry,
Speaker 1: I'll make it worth your while. I get you to
Speaker 1: other people to do that day. That's how people think stacking.
Speaker 1: This motherfucker is getting on the plane, just like my
Speaker 1: carpet steamer guy. Why because Geez came on the fucking
Speaker 1: plane to clean my carpet. Why because he end up
Speaker 1: getting so much business because he got on the fucking
Speaker 1: plane to clean my carpet. What's a plane ticket four
Speaker 1: or five hundred dollars? Okay, who's well worth it? He's
Speaker 1: not a dummy, and he was Albanian. Everyone I love
Speaker 1: and work with his Albanian. So I get on the phone.
Speaker 1: I go call the closet guy back. After he says
Speaker 1: this to me, I'm like, I got you. You have
Speaker 1: three people in one day, and I might getch you more.
Speaker 1: We get back on the phone. I goes, let me
Speaker 1: ask you a question. I don't want to get suit.
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is like asking an employee
Speaker 1: their age. Are you Albanian? He goes yeah, I go,
Speaker 1: what the motherfucker? He goes yup. He goes, I saw
Speaker 1: your video and you talked about an Albanian shout out.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I live for my Albanians. So he's Albanian.
Speaker 1: He's doing my closets and two other people. You need
Speaker 1: a closet in Florida, I got a guy. Okay, moving
Speaker 1: right along. So I spend money in the shit that
Speaker 1: matters in Yes, closets matter, like in all the guest
Speaker 1: rooms in the organization. But like everyone doesn't need a
Speaker 1: purple marble island. Okay, wat back the after, walk back
Speaker 1: the after