Speaker 1: It's a Christmas sleigh fa la la la la fa
Speaker 1: la la la la la la.
Speaker 2: Merry Christmas, Happy holidays, my love. Yep, you can't get
Speaker 2: rid of us even on Christmas.
Speaker 3: You're welcome, best present ever for them?
Speaker 2: Are you looking at the monitor?
Speaker 4: Look at her dead stare staring at the monitors waiting
Speaker 4: for her.
Speaker 5: Well, she's right here.
Speaker 2: I'm right here in the flesh.
Speaker 5: Lease, that's why. And you're allowed to be like loose
Speaker 5: and move your chair.
Speaker 2: She's on camera last week.
Speaker 1: Last week, you guys, she made an impromptu guest appearance
Speaker 1: on the pod. She was on the couch watching ocean,
Speaker 1: and she was sitting there luxurious and could not have
Speaker 1: been more unfazed by being I love when you're chillen,
Speaker 1: But the camera freaks her out, by the way.
Speaker 2: You guys look a little tired this morning. How are
Speaker 2: we feeling?
Speaker 5: You feel like shit?
Speaker 3: Why?
Speaker 5: I don't know? My eyes are discharging themselves.
Speaker 6: E I'm going, I said, bros.
Speaker 5: I feel like I'm still not awake with these eyeballs.
Speaker 5: I feel awake, but my eyes don't.
Speaker 1: What's the morning routine? Because you know, I just feel
Speaker 1: like there needs.
Speaker 5: To be one kind of you would you like to
Speaker 5: go first with you? I don't know yours.
Speaker 4: It's walking out of your bedroom at eight point thirty
Speaker 4: to come greet us in the kitchen.
Speaker 2: Can I just show you coffee? Yeah?
Speaker 1: But can I show you you guys will see this
Speaker 1: on YouTube. But this is how my mother wakes up
Speaker 1: in the morning.
Speaker 2: Okay, do you.
Speaker 5: Want to do the walk? Jack skelling in the morning morning?
Speaker 2: I'm like, who is this? T rex.
Speaker 5: Lee?
Speaker 3: I don't want to contact in it.
Speaker 2: It's more about not being able.
Speaker 4: Well, then, why isn't that part of your morning routine?
Speaker 4: Stretching stretching out it you do do?
Speaker 5: She'l let's we'll give her grace on this one.
Speaker 4: Let me tell you what, wretch, Get out of bed,
Speaker 4: go into the bathroom, put your contacts in, and then
Speaker 4: come out.
Speaker 3: Too much activity. Got to get my coffee in me first.
Speaker 2: Let me tell you something. This is how you do
Speaker 2: a morning routine. Okay.
Speaker 1: If you have to leave the house like today, you're
Speaker 1: gonna be on camera. Right, This is gonna be on
Speaker 1: YouTube and you're gonna have to live with the fact
Speaker 1: that you guys look like shit.
Speaker 2: I'm just kidding.
Speaker 5: That's every week for Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1: You wake up in the morning, you you put a
Speaker 1: little bit of cold water on the eyes, get like
Speaker 1: this stuff out right, then you go directly into your
Speaker 1: drawer and use eye drops.
Speaker 2: Now, I'm a fan of rotos, and.
Speaker 1: I became obsessed with rotos when my very sexy Samoan
Speaker 1: stoner boyfriend used to if you see.
Speaker 5: Rotos, they're stoners.
Speaker 4: I don't know what persons that uses rotos that isn't
Speaker 4: high me.
Speaker 1: Well that I love or.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 2: Rotos is where it's at. And they have so many
Speaker 2: different kinds.
Speaker 5: Right yeah, and they all burn like hell.
Speaker 2: It feels amazing.
Speaker 1: Then you put a nice oil on the face, let
Speaker 1: it chill while you brush your teeth, and then ever
Speaker 1: so gently with a cotton pad, wipe it off and
Speaker 1: then you look excellent like I do.
Speaker 5: Do you want to know what it is? We need
Speaker 5: bigger bathrooms?
Speaker 3: Yep?
Speaker 2: Oh well, let me get on that. Let me let
Speaker 2: me call.
Speaker 5: The We're moving to St. George. Did she not tell you?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 4: Well, that's resolution in twenty twenty five to live in
Speaker 4: Saint George, Utah for a year.
Speaker 1: I love how everyone's like my My manifestation is a
Speaker 1: boarding mission on Lauren.
Speaker 2: No, you guys. You guys like coming.
Speaker 5: I really am going to get better at a morning routine.
Speaker 5: I need to. I'm getting to the age of I
Speaker 5: need to take care of my skin.
Speaker 1: I forgot to say that you also have to put
Speaker 1: on like a really fabulous I cream.
Speaker 2: I draw.
Speaker 1: I'm drawn towards anything that has snail musine in it.
Speaker 2: Look at my mom, She's like, I'm not doing.
Speaker 6: Like I like getting up in the morning. I like
Speaker 6: greeting the kids, getting my cup of coffee. I have
Speaker 6: my routine, and I like my.
Speaker 4: But you put like like trout come on your face.
Speaker 1: Right, trout come salm, Salmon's sperm, salmon com When you
Speaker 1: say it like that, it makes me not want to
Speaker 1: put it on any longer.
Speaker 5: You know how I felt when you were sliding out
Speaker 5: across your face.
Speaker 2: I was like, there's just no way it really works.
Speaker 3: Inducts.
Speaker 2: I'm a product before, and.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you for Christmas beautiful, you are a
Speaker 1: way to anyone's heart.
Speaker 2: I believe is through products.
Speaker 1: Like I feel when you're sitting there racking your brain
Speaker 1: on what to get somebody, go directly to a product,
Speaker 1: Go to cozy, go to an anti aging serum. I
Speaker 1: love anything that I can like put on that smells yummy,
Speaker 1: prevents wrinkles, or makes me feel like I'm sleeping in
Speaker 1: a snuggie.
Speaker 4: Because I also need a nighttime routine because I do
Speaker 4: not have one.
Speaker 5: Do you?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I do? Okay, that I do. That's why you look
Speaker 5: so magnificent. Good morning.
Speaker 3: And I like my vesseline around my eyes.
Speaker 2: Well that's the game game changer.
Speaker 3: Wrinkles.
Speaker 5: What wrinkles?
Speaker 2: Your face looks great.
Speaker 1: So we were thinking about because it is Christmas Day,
Speaker 1: all of all things Christmas, right, I'm like, let's talk
Speaker 1: about Christmas feuds. I then immediately go to we never
Speaker 1: got the Christmas photo. So we were in Hawaii and
Speaker 1: I made everyone pack these Christmas pajamas. And keep in mind,
Speaker 1: we learned from last year that we had overpacked, so
Speaker 1: I packed.
Speaker 2: In a backpack. I packed so well. I couldn't have
Speaker 2: done it any better.
Speaker 3: You really, you really did. I will agree with that.
Speaker 3: Because we had a washer and dryer.
Speaker 5: Yes, so thanks to you. Thank you for the laundry.
Speaker 1: Yes, of course, yes, Easton and I were like, how
Speaker 1: do you open the fucking dryer in this place? I'm like,
Speaker 1: this is why I let Lisa do it the whole time.
Speaker 1: There's we were opening it the wrong way, but there.
Speaker 5: Was not on that side.
Speaker 1: So I'm not a homemaker. No, you don't be rude.
Speaker 1: Protected I've always said, like, I'm not a housewife, Like
Speaker 1: if you're looking for someone to cook, clean and tickle
Speaker 1: your back at night, like I ain't the one, right,
Speaker 1: But I know that Tesla just came out with a
Speaker 1: robot who I'm sure will do all of those things
Speaker 1: for you, and at some point, I'm sure they'll figure
Speaker 1: out a way to have this thing blow you as well.
Speaker 1: All right, buy one of those save your pennies. So
Speaker 1: I packed these pjs and we have this phenomenal uh.
Speaker 1: We go with Joe Schmelzer and he is a fantastic
Speaker 1: photographer and I'm like, oh my god, he's gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have him take the photo he offered. And every
Speaker 1: single day we're like, we're here for two weeks, we'll
Speaker 1: get it done.
Speaker 2: We're here for two weeks. Literally the last week, I.
Speaker 3: Kept saying we'll do it tomorrow. That was our motto.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we always say we'll do it tomorrow.
Speaker 1: And then Easton comes in with shaming me because I
Speaker 1: wanted the Christmas PJS on the beach family photo.
Speaker 2: And what did you say to me? Easton?
Speaker 5: I said, what are you a Mormon housewife?
Speaker 2: I was so offended.
Speaker 5: But you're not a housewife. We've just discovered. So why
Speaker 5: did you want the photo?
Speaker 1: Because I thought it would be I just thought it
Speaker 1: would be cute to have with all of us.
Speaker 2: I have zero family photo.
Speaker 4: I agree, but the only thing that I was picturing
Speaker 4: was us on a beach in flannel outfits.
Speaker 5: It was very well and then that's all.
Speaker 4: I walked into to every friend's home in Utah was
Speaker 4: just like the family.
Speaker 1: Photo with like twelve hundred kids, not just one family fother, no,
Speaker 1: one hundred of them, like every wall decorated.
Speaker 5: With Yeah, I love my family. I'm with you every day.
Speaker 5: Don't need pictures of it.
Speaker 6: I like a frame picture on a like on a
Speaker 6: table here or there, But I don't like framed art
Speaker 6: like a family photo everywhere, sorry.
Speaker 2: Or anywhere you walk into my house, You guys, there
Speaker 2: is not one you would take sure of anybody except
Speaker 2: for the deceased.
Speaker 5: As well as the decease.
Speaker 3: And I've got even your do yours got her picture?
Speaker 2: That's what I mean, the only.
Speaker 1: And the tiniest little pictures, and it's not a full
Speaker 1: body or with anybody, it's just their faces.
Speaker 2: Just people died.
Speaker 5: And she goes Poppy and she kisses.
Speaker 1: She also said to me the other day that Poppy
Speaker 1: sent I said this to her and she hung on
Speaker 1: to it, but she said, Poppy sent me to you.
Speaker 1: I know it's very cute, but I agree easton the
Speaker 1: moment you said.
Speaker 2: That, I was.
Speaker 1: Joe walks over, He's like, are you ready for the
Speaker 1: family photo? I was like, so, we're not doing it,
Speaker 1: because it is every time I walked into a friend's
Speaker 1: house it was the parents, the children, the grandchildren where
Speaker 1: there's like twenty seven of them an.
Speaker 4: All yeah, and the color coordination like all white shirts
Speaker 4: with tan pants or shit like that.
Speaker 5: And I was like, and now we're doing flannel.
Speaker 2: Or the Christmas pajamas.
Speaker 6: Yeah, we'll take one for ourselves. In Palm Springs.
Speaker 1: Wow, in the pool, Nick got a family photo of
Speaker 1: us that's very cute. At the dinner that we had
Speaker 1: at Joe's the restaurant, and so So was gravitating towards
Speaker 1: looking directly at the ground.
Speaker 2: So I tried to prop her so that you could
Speaker 2: see her face.
Speaker 1: And it just looks like I don't know how to
Speaker 1: hold a baby.
Speaker 3: Did we all look like you're in the headlights of it?
Speaker 2: No, we all look great.
Speaker 1: I just know what people will say if I were
Speaker 1: to ever post it.
Speaker 2: They'd be like, look at her, she has like no
Speaker 2: maternal instinct. She can't even hold her own baby. Because
Speaker 2: it does I look so awkward.
Speaker 4: I'm like, they're like, how did Ocean get to the
Speaker 4: age she's at with you holding your other one like that?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Pretty much.
Speaker 2: So I'm like, oh, this will just be for us.
Speaker 1: Isn't that sad that when we take photos, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I can't post it, and I'm like, here's an idea.
Speaker 2: How about it's just for you. Yeah, there's a thought
Speaker 2: or let.
Speaker 5: The people say whatever they want and.
Speaker 2: Then well, now we can post it. We'll post it
Speaker 2: on the video.
Speaker 1: I'll post it with this video on the podcast page
Speaker 1: and people can see that it is an awkward photo
Speaker 1: of how I'm holding Sosa, but it's a great picture.
Speaker 6: I can't believe you don't want to use the Luau
Speaker 6: picture for the holiday.
Speaker 5: I look great, you guys.
Speaker 2: Ocean enjoyed it.
Speaker 5: I know she did.
Speaker 2: Ocean thoroughly enjoyed it.
Speaker 1: We go to Disneyland for Christmas to see all things Trees,
Speaker 1: Mickey Mouse, Santa claus Is, and it was the most
Speaker 1: fantastic time that I think I've had at Disneyland in
Speaker 1: so long because the lines were like nothing.
Speaker 3: No one was there, Nobody was there.
Speaker 4: I had a good feeling when we were going. And
Speaker 4: then even when we had that issue with the tickets,
Speaker 4: there was no way that I was not going. No,
Speaker 4: I would have forked over money to get you.
Speaker 5: Oh, we were buying tickets, but I knew, like I
Speaker 5: had a good feeling, and it was a fucking great day.
Speaker 5: It was.
Speaker 1: And what's crazy is I was truly in the Christmas
Speaker 1: spirit when I got there, and you know, the universe
Speaker 1: kept throwing wrenches in the day and I would sit
Speaker 1: there and I'm I'm like, if people don't fall in
Speaker 1: line today, I'm about to a month fuck up because
Speaker 1: my kid is going to Disneyland to see Santa Mickey
Speaker 1: Mouse's and I'm not playing today. And everyone like I
Speaker 1: would get to the window to like straighten something out,
Speaker 1: ready to just go fucking toes. I go toes with
Speaker 1: Sylvia at the windows who's like pushing eighty.
Speaker 2: And she was like, how can I help you?
Speaker 1: And I tell her my problem and I'm ready to
Speaker 1: just mess everything up, and she's like, you could absolutely
Speaker 1: get into the park today. This is no big deal,
Speaker 1: hunt and I'm.
Speaker 5: Like, wow, people are nice.
Speaker 2: This is really great. So we dodge one thing.
Speaker 1: Keep in mind, I got Ocean a pass and Disneyland
Speaker 1: does this thing now where not only do you get
Speaker 1: the pass, but then you have to make the reservation
Speaker 1: and depending on the pass, you may have twenty seven
Speaker 1: thousand blackout dates and you can't see the blackout dates
Speaker 1: before you purchase. So I get a text from Erica,
Speaker 1: she and his mom, and she's like, hey, just so
Speaker 1: you know, passes are now available, because it only comes
Speaker 1: around like once a year. Maybe, she's like, this is
Speaker 1: the one we got summer. I get it for Ocean.
Speaker 1: I'm like, hell, yeah, let's go on this day. I
Speaker 1: go to make the reservation. Oceans is blacked out that day,
Speaker 1: so it doesn't even occur to me, like just buy
Speaker 1: her a ticket for that day. Instead, I'm like, we're
Speaker 1: gonna pretend like she's two, yeah.
Speaker 5: Two, we snuck a child.
Speaker 3: Well about it, because.
Speaker 6: We've spent money on a pass we did every day
Speaker 6: was blacked out every day in December, so sorry, dead,
Speaker 6: it was dead.
Speaker 1: So Ocean has this Grinch blanket, and when we first
Speaker 1: go in, this woman's like how old is she? And
Speaker 1: I go, she'll be three, and she's like, okay, I'm
Speaker 1: telling you it's the bangs. The bangs make her look
Speaker 1: older and the fact that she's getting taller and can
Speaker 1: fully talk. All of those things definitely scream that she's
Speaker 1: almost four.
Speaker 2: But it's okay. So we get in. Then we decide let's.
Speaker 1: Go over to Disneyland because we did California Adventure. And
Speaker 1: Easton looks at me and he's like, we have to do.
Speaker 2: The thing again. I'm like, what thing.
Speaker 1: He's like, we have to get our tickets scanned again.
Speaker 1: I immediately panic. So I'm like covering Ocean with this
Speaker 1: grinch blanket.
Speaker 5: Trying to tell her she's too.
Speaker 3: Teaching her, I said, hold up the yes goes.
Speaker 5: If they ask you how old you are, just hold
Speaker 5: up the peace sign.
Speaker 1: So people are gonna be like, great, Laa'm teaching her
Speaker 1: to light no, no, no, we bought the past, teaching her
Speaker 1: that Disneyland shouldn't black out so many dates on your pass.
Speaker 2: So I'm strolling her in.
Speaker 1: She's got the crnch blanket on, and she and the
Speaker 1: woman she's exhausted, thank god. So she's like ready to
Speaker 1: go to bed, and the woman asks me what's under there?
Speaker 4: But the blanket was going over the little handrail, so
Speaker 4: it did look a little bumpy.
Speaker 1: So so I go, oh, it's my my child, and
Speaker 1: I show her and she goes, no, no, no, under there,
Speaker 1: And I think she's pointing to like the carrier that
Speaker 1: you shove your shit in on the very bottom of
Speaker 1: the back was and I go she, I'm like, there's nothing,
Speaker 1: just bagpies and she are you hiding someone under the blanket.
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, no, no, we're not trying to sneak another kid,
Speaker 2: and just the one you see.
Speaker 3: We're just thinking it's not She took it for herself
Speaker 3: to move the blanket. See for herself.
Speaker 1: If she made it much more difficult, no, she made
Speaker 1: it much better.
Speaker 4: That she thought we were sneaking in a kid that
Speaker 4: we weren't to get the one that we were in.
Speaker 4: She totally forgot about the one we were sneaking in.
Speaker 3: Should we feel guilty, No, we bought.
Speaker 5: A damn ticket.
Speaker 1: Don't blackout so many days and a thousand dollars on
Speaker 1: Ocean's pass.
Speaker 2: Mom, No, I don't feel guilty.
Speaker 6: Okay, Well, you know what I wish we would have
Speaker 6: done is looked at our passes and gotten her the
Speaker 6: same pass.
Speaker 2: Well, that would be too on the ball.
Speaker 6: It's annoying to me that you spend money on a
Speaker 6: pass and every day's blacked out. But yet if you
Speaker 6: go up to the ticket window you can get a
Speaker 6: pass that day.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, they always have another way to get in,
Speaker 1: but it's there, it'll cost you.
Speaker 2: So this is what I loved about this round of Disney.
Speaker 1: We were Easton and I were able to ride like
Speaker 1: all the grown women rides.
Speaker 2: Right, so we get on too.
Speaker 1: It needs to be Tower of Terror and it's now
Speaker 1: Guardians of the Galaxy. And what also happened on that
Speaker 1: same ride is we're sitting there with this woman and
Speaker 1: this man in front of us.
Speaker 5: No no, no, no, no, that was Guardians.
Speaker 2: Oh I'm getting the two confused. Yes, on Guardians.
Speaker 1: This guy is talking to his friend and his girlfriend
Speaker 1: is there, but she leaves to.
Speaker 2: Go get snacks.
Speaker 4: Why they wait, It's that he was talking to his
Speaker 4: girlfriend's friend friend.
Speaker 1: Okay, and we're right behind them, you guys. She leaves
Speaker 1: the girlfriend and he pulls up a photo and starts
Speaker 1: talking about how he's gonna propose to her at Disneyland.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no no no like coming out like
Speaker 1: I think in the like on Christmas?
Speaker 2: Is what it sounded like.
Speaker 3: Can I say something always?
Speaker 6: I don't like when people propose on a holiday, like, Oh, that's.
Speaker 5: Because that takes away an anniversary day from.
Speaker 6: Well, it takes away at present, a present, like here's
Speaker 6: your Christmas present?
Speaker 5: This is.
Speaker 2: This is how Lisa looks at it.
Speaker 1: Lisa looks at it as oh, you took the cheap
Speaker 1: way out, whereas I look at it as I'm giving
Speaker 1: you the best gift.
Speaker 6: No, it's not the cheap way out. It's like I
Speaker 6: want double gifts. I want engagement and I want Christmas.
Speaker 2: You want it to be two separate days.
Speaker 3: Okay, God, rest not on your birthday.
Speaker 6: I don't want to get engaged on my birthday because
Speaker 6: I want a birthday present, and then I want an
Speaker 6: engagement ring and present.
Speaker 2: Oh, a ring and a present.
Speaker 3: I got an engagement present for your dad?
Speaker 2: What was it?
Speaker 1: A horse that's ballers. Where is Tucson now?
Speaker 6: Tucson went to Montana and this was how many years ago?
Speaker 6: So Tucson is no longer with it?
Speaker 2: Damn all right, that's a great gift. You're spoiled, but
Speaker 2: I mean the most peace.
Speaker 1: I can't be like, I'm gonna buy my future fiance
Speaker 1: a ring and then also spend money on a horse,
Speaker 1: which is thousands of dollars.
Speaker 5: How often did you ride the horse a lot.
Speaker 2: Back in the day? I remembering, Utaw, you would ride
Speaker 2: it a lot.
Speaker 3: And I'm getting another horse. But that's it.
Speaker 5: We heard that last year. We'll see.
Speaker 1: But how wild that when the woman returns Easton and
Speaker 1: I could have just fucked shit.
Speaker 2: Up in that line?
Speaker 5: Oh yeah she returned, No me, No, but it was.
Speaker 7: But I do have thoughts like you were just sitting
Speaker 7: there and me and we're just listening to just having
Speaker 7: a normal conversation, and me and La turned to each
Speaker 7: other and I go, we could fuck this up right now,
Speaker 7: and she's dying lab and she.
Speaker 1: Goes, I I was stereo that. I'm like, I could
Speaker 1: so easily just pop my head and be like, the
Speaker 1: ring's gorgeous. I'm so excited for you to get engaged.
Speaker 5: I was almost, yeah. If I like the shoes, they
Speaker 5: were gonna be mine. His watch too.
Speaker 2: I wanted the icy she brought back, and I was like,
Speaker 2: are they They.
Speaker 3: Were going Ici?
Speaker 2: They had icis and it was like a lemonade type thing.
Speaker 5: Again.
Speaker 1: What I also learned during Christmas time at Disneyland is
Speaker 1: Lisa is not allowed to hat shop on her own.
Speaker 2: Y'all.
Speaker 1: We go on Indiana Jones and while we're doing that,
Speaker 1: me and she comes out of the gift shop and
Speaker 1: she's like, I got this this hat.
Speaker 2: It is so cute, I know.
Speaker 6: But I have two other opinions on it, and they
Speaker 6: said it looks great on you.
Speaker 5: Well, I would have said that to my friend's mom too.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't have.
Speaker 1: I would have never done that to someone because she
Speaker 1: puts it on and it's twelve sizes too big.
Speaker 4: Literally, I could, I could three fingers behind her head.
Speaker 5: That's how too big of it, you know.
Speaker 3: But I think that's how I wear my hat.
Speaker 1: That's why they're always cooked though. Mom, it's like embarrassing.
Speaker 1: You walk out, You've got food around your mouth, you
Speaker 1: got a crooked hat. You're a fucking mess at all times.
Speaker 3: It's today.
Speaker 1: No, thank god, because you had on this exact hat
Speaker 1: the other day and I went like barely and it
Speaker 1: just flipped right off because it was so crooked. It's
Speaker 1: like swashing around. I don't even know how you put
Speaker 1: it on your head and think this feels.
Speaker 6: Good because it's lightweight and doesn't it's not constraining or
Speaker 6: whatever the word.
Speaker 1: No, she'll be like she's got a crooked hat. She's like,
Speaker 1: do I have sleepies in my eyes? And like you've
Speaker 1: got a grill full of chocolate in your teeth in
Speaker 1: the creases.
Speaker 2: Get it together and then go to it. I can't see.
Speaker 6: I can't see, but you know what that reminds me
Speaker 6: of your dad? No? No, I mean never when. And
Speaker 6: I don't know if I've told you this story, but
Speaker 6: Dad and I went to a salad bar pizza place
Speaker 6: before we went to a movie, and all of a sudden,
Speaker 6: my throat starts itching and my eyes and we're watching
Speaker 6: the movie and the lights come on and I licked
Speaker 6: at him and said, do I need lipstick? And he goes,
Speaker 6: you need to put your glasses on, and my face
Speaker 6: had an allergic reaction and I had to go on steroids.
Speaker 3: My face was like everything was swollen and huge.
Speaker 5: You couldn't feel your mouth anything.
Speaker 3: What did you say something?
Speaker 6: You're just getting bigger through the Moon Hills when they
Speaker 6: had theaters there.
Speaker 2: You want to know what's crazy, though, is that Dad?
Speaker 1: Like if someone looked at me, I would never be like, girl,
Speaker 1: put your glasses on.
Speaker 2: I'd be like, we got to get you a benadryl.
Speaker 1: No, but I wouldn't really worry about the glasses or
Speaker 1: anything like that.
Speaker 2: I'd be like, we have to go to the er, right.
Speaker 2: But Dad wanted you to look pretty.
Speaker 1: On the way out, He's like, bitch, I married your
Speaker 1: for your looks, certainly not for your cooking. Put them
Speaker 1: glasses on. We'll deal with the allergic reaction later.
Speaker 5: Walking out like a blowfish?
Speaker 3: Were you? Can?
Speaker 1: I tell you something on the note of my sweet dad.
Speaker 1: Dad stroke Lily. So you guys know that Lily Lily
Speaker 1: had a stroke and before Christmas.
Speaker 3: I not we're not laughing about it. We felt really
Speaker 3: bad when she and it happened.
Speaker 2: I was devastated. I was sobbing.
Speaker 1: I was about to give birth to Sosa in a
Speaker 1: week and my dog had a stroke and I thought
Speaker 1: this is going to be the most horrific time of
Speaker 1: my life. Lily has been here since I was twenty
Speaker 1: one years old, been at every apartment with me, been
Speaker 1: when she first moved out to LA. She went to
Speaker 1: every party with me, been with me since I was
Speaker 1: a drunk, through sobriety each I was like, I looked
Speaker 1: at her. I said, girl, you better not go anywhere
Speaker 1: because Sosa has to have you like period.
Speaker 3: We all do.
Speaker 5: Of course, did you not see that?
Speaker 2: I know, because she can't make it up the stairs anymore.
Speaker 5: But the pit bulls, did you not see them? When
Speaker 5: she finally.
Speaker 2: Got home, they were all so excited.
Speaker 5: Oh, they went outside and were jumping. They love her.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she had this stroke back in September, right, and
Speaker 1: I know this sounds disgusting, but she hasn't been able
Speaker 1: to stand, so I haven't been able to groom her.
Speaker 1: So what I do is I take her in the
Speaker 1: backyard and I sprits her down with a yummy smell
Speaker 1: and brush through her. So finally she's been like she's
Speaker 1: getting a little pep in her stuff, although she is old.
Speaker 2: So we take her to the groomer.
Speaker 1: Right before Christmas, so she has a nice Christmas glow
Speaker 1: and a Christmas bath.
Speaker 2: And they call it took like twelve hours.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so they called, and I get to go get
Speaker 4: her so I can get her into the car. But
Speaker 4: so I get her and this nice lady is just
Speaker 4: telling me all about it.
Speaker 5: We tipper.
Speaker 4: And after I tipp her, she's like, thank you so much,
Speaker 4: And she was like she was great, she did amazing.
Speaker 4: She could only stand for so long. When I put
Speaker 4: her in the tub, she did poop.
Speaker 5: And right when she's so shit in the tub. Yeah,
Speaker 5: shit in the tub.
Speaker 4: And so right when she said that, I reached into
Speaker 4: my pocket and handed her another twenty.
Speaker 5: I thought, for your troubles.
Speaker 3: Well, I want him to take her again.
Speaker 4: Well that's why I was like, we're gonna take I
Speaker 4: did tell her. I was like, every time, will take
Speaker 4: care of you for doing her.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, did you tell her that?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 4: I was like, we love you because I believe her
Speaker 4: name is Phoenix. She's done adi no, whatever she does,
Speaker 4: we had to take care of her. But I did
Speaker 4: tell her that, and she was like, I love all
Speaker 4: of your dogs.
Speaker 5: So she made me feel good about.
Speaker 1: It, and she groomed lily before this stroke. They were
Speaker 1: wondering where she had been.
Speaker 5: She even asked.
Speaker 4: She was like, I was wondering where Lily was, and
Speaker 4: it's nice when you walk in and they just know, yeah.
Speaker 5: And how is Lily? And so she was like, we
Speaker 5: were wondering. So I told her that she had a stroke.
Speaker 5: And then she even said she was like, I didn't
Speaker 5: blow dryer because she didn't love the blow drying in
Speaker 5: her face and I didn't. Well that's what I said.
Speaker 3: I was stressful for her.
Speaker 4: She had a stroke, so let's not stress her anymore.
Speaker 4: But yeah, she's ship in the tub and.
Speaker 2: Ah, but she looks gorgeous. She had a Christmas pep
Speaker 2: in her stuff too. When she walked in.
Speaker 3: She was she was feeling herself for sure.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, that was Christmas.
Speaker 2: Oh she was Christmas slaying her little laptop, wasn't she?
Speaker 1: Did you guys see that Melissa Gorga launched her Sprinkle.
Speaker 2: Cookies cookie line.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, So to break this down easton the very
Speaker 1: beginning of I think it was like season three maybe
Speaker 1: two that Melissa Gorga came on to Real Housewives of
Speaker 1: New Jersey and it was this big thing that during Christmas,
Speaker 1: the Gorgas went to the Jude's house and Melissa Gorga
Speaker 1: brought Sprinkle cookies and Teresa was so offended. She's like,
Speaker 1: I like Canoli's, you know, I would bring like a
Speaker 1: conole or maybe like and she talks about like another
Speaker 1: Italian cookie.
Speaker 2: She goes, I couldn't believe she brought Sprinkle cookies. I
Speaker 2: threw them in the trash.
Speaker 1: And it has lived on this long, right, I think
Speaker 1: they're on season like fourteen fifteen, So that shows how
Speaker 1: long it was an iconic.
Speaker 5: It's been a decade plus.
Speaker 1: Yes, So Melissa Gorga has launched her Sprinkle Cookie line,
Speaker 1: which I was like, oh my gosh, like, what a
Speaker 1: great idea.
Speaker 2: Number one. They do look so good.
Speaker 3: Well, I love sprinkle cookies.
Speaker 5: You love all cooks. I think you love a sweet
Speaker 5: Why I tell you?
Speaker 1: I'm like, how amazing to take because Christmas time a
Speaker 1: really big thing to do is like cookie exchanges.
Speaker 3: Right, yes, be a part of a cookie exchange? Wait?
Speaker 2: What oh back in pair blossom.
Speaker 3: Pair blossom circle?
Speaker 1: Baby, wait you would make cookies to go to that?
Speaker 5: How many people? Is it like a book club but
Speaker 5: with cookies?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, everyone makes their own cookie and brings them.
Speaker 3: Okay, it's the recipe.
Speaker 6: And then yeah, you come with the recipe and you
Speaker 6: get to you have to make like six if there's
Speaker 6: six people, you have to make six dozen, or if
Speaker 6: there's twelve people, twelve dozen. Yeah, but then we start
Speaker 6: cutting it down. So I want to tell you my story. Wait,
Speaker 6: tell me all right. So I had this cookie exchange.
Speaker 6: It was on a Sunday. Dad and I had gone
Speaker 6: out Saturday night till all hours of the night. So
Speaker 6: I start around midnight to make my cookies and I'm
Speaker 6: using my family's Cromarty piekands to make those lace kind
Speaker 6: of cookies, and I'm so excited about it. First batch
Speaker 6: comes out, didn't turn out, second batch didn't turn out.
Speaker 6: It is like literally two o'clock in the morning, and
Speaker 6: the cookie exchanges the next morning at eleven. So I'm crap,
Speaker 6: what am I going to do? The stores are closed. Well,
Speaker 6: I had Pillsbury the slice and baked cookies, so I
Speaker 6: made those in the oven and then I melted chocolate
Speaker 6: and dipped them and put a pecan on the top
Speaker 6: and I took those.
Speaker 5: Day. Was like, these are the best cookies I've ever heard.
Speaker 3: He told his wife feature to get the recipe.
Speaker 2: Recip did you say it, I said aloud.
Speaker 5: I said, it's.
Speaker 3: A family secret.
Speaker 2: Well, it's the whole purpose of the cookie exchange.
Speaker 4: It's just bring a dozen for each person, as well
Speaker 4: as the recipe.
Speaker 5: And you just fucking didn't make cookies. You just baked pimate.
Speaker 6: I just kind of tossed it off, like, oh, I'll
Speaker 6: get you the recipe, but I didn't.
Speaker 5: You were invited back.
Speaker 6: My dear friend came along with me because I got
Speaker 6: her invited, and she made these.
Speaker 4: Like was it like a little loaf of bread, like
Speaker 4: a banana bread loaf?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the size, and she.
Speaker 6: Kind of like this big like little tiny squares and
Speaker 6: she didn't get invited back.
Speaker 3: They said she was.
Speaker 2: What didn't I call it? If you guys were filming
Speaker 2: Real Housewives of Sally.
Speaker 1: At that time, that would have been like the biggest
Speaker 1: storyline of this season.
Speaker 5: I can.
Speaker 4: You ask your friend if she was going through the
Speaker 4: same experience of you at three am andies not turning out,
Speaker 4: Maybe she was like, fucking all I have.
Speaker 5: Truly, did she bring a recipe?
Speaker 3: They're too rich recipe yesterday?
Speaker 5: Did you bring a recipe?
Speaker 1: Probably that's probably what happened to the others didn't turn
Speaker 1: out and she loved her.
Speaker 5: You just think she just got up and nine and
Speaker 5: baked that and said fuck it.
Speaker 3: Wait, you were too rich A lot? Little pad did well?
Speaker 5: Did it? So?
Speaker 3: What child would have liked to have had more?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 1: You would always like to out more. Do you have
Speaker 1: a whole box something to take home?
Speaker 6: And my but you know what, my cookies were usually
Speaker 6: better than everyone else's, and I'm like, damn, I gotta
Speaker 6: take these what I'd rather just take my own homes.
Speaker 5: Things like like you're bitching about.
Speaker 3: Print cookie or whatever, something.
Speaker 5: That's just not out of the packet. You're bitching about it.
Speaker 5: I want my own. Okay, go home and open the
Speaker 5: cookies thing and throw them in. It wasn't like you
Speaker 5: were hard at work.
Speaker 6: You know what I could have done, thinking about it,
Speaker 6: I could have double dip oreos chocolate Oreos.
Speaker 1: Well, that would have said I would have done it,
Speaker 1: and those are hella good. Could have done peanut butter
Speaker 1: and then dipped it in the chocolate and hardened people
Speaker 1: would have I mean, technically that's homemade to me, Yeah, that's.
Speaker 5: Totally homemade melting chocolate.
Speaker 2: Yes, I made them at home.
Speaker 3: Hey, they sell them at Candy Stories. For a lot
Speaker 3: of money.
Speaker 2: Oh so fuck, let's not even do it on our own.
Speaker 1: Let's just go buy them. By the way, nothing slaps
Speaker 1: like an oreo or a Milano. I would much rather
Speaker 1: have that at a cookie exchange. The raspberry thumb prints
Speaker 1: that you were talking about.
Speaker 5: What's a raspberry thumb print?
Speaker 1: The fact that there's a thumb that's involved, is that's
Speaker 1: what I do?
Speaker 5: Is it like you're just.
Speaker 2: Finger banging these cookies before you.
Speaker 5: Delivered them to my mouth.
Speaker 4: I don't trust people's kitchens, and if they were just
Speaker 4: pushing these raspberries into the kitchener.
Speaker 1: I was always confused by the school when they were like,
Speaker 1: please buy things at the store, don't bring homemade snacks,
Speaker 1: And I was like, homemade snacks? Who the hell would
Speaker 1: ever like make anything at home?
Speaker 3: Walling, you have to question people's kitchens.
Speaker 4: Maybe they're not I can't throw up, But yeah, when
Speaker 4: I worked in offices and we had like pot lucks
Speaker 4: and stuff, I never ate anything.
Speaker 2: Wait, can I tell you, guys?
Speaker 5: Can I tell you don't trust you? And I know
Speaker 5: the look I.
Speaker 4: See the inside of your car, If that's any indication
Speaker 4: of your home, you can fuck off.
Speaker 1: No, you guys, I totally agree, because can I tell
Speaker 1: you something there during Christmas time, I was probably in
Speaker 1: the first grade, and we went to the Lion House
Speaker 1: and I was telling land in this story yesterday, you guys,
Speaker 1: Apparently the Lion House is Brigham Young's. It was Brigham
Speaker 1: Young's house. He's like with him and all his wives, right,
Speaker 1: like fifty fifty in this house, you guys. And we
Speaker 1: were we were doing something. The memory is a little
Speaker 1: bit hazy except for what followed. They had us doing
Speaker 1: like Susie homemaker shit, like they were teaching us to
Speaker 1: be like domestic people like home.
Speaker 2: Yes, but it wasn't school. This was like a thing.
Speaker 1: So I was in charge of doing dishes and I
Speaker 1: was like dressed up, I had tights on, and I
Speaker 1: had to use the bathroom so badly. And this woman
Speaker 1: was like, we had just eaten whatever, you know, Sally
Speaker 1: had made us, and I was in charge of doing the.
Speaker 2: Dishes after and there was like a pile of them.
Speaker 3: What a horrible job.
Speaker 5: For a seven year old.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're teaching me how to get a husband.
Speaker 6: I don't know if i'd trust eating off those seven
Speaker 6: year old wash dishes.
Speaker 1: You because do you want to know what followed as
Speaker 1: I did the dishes, what I did? I peed all
Speaker 1: over the floor the room.
Speaker 2: I tights myself.
Speaker 3: That's sad. She didn't let you go to the bathroom.
Speaker 2: I didn't ask, Oh, you know what.
Speaker 1: I You know, at that age you kind of get
Speaker 1: embarrassed to be like, can I go to the bathroom.
Speaker 4: I'll never forget when I was in third grade, a
Speaker 4: little boy in front of me, I'll never forget he
Speaker 4: peed in his.
Speaker 5: Chair and he got up. They let him go, but
Speaker 5: I'll never forget like after he got up, just the
Speaker 5: wetness and then the chair just full disgusting.
Speaker 1: No memories, No, but Mom, you were there and drove
Speaker 1: me home, and I remember just feeling so.
Speaker 2: Itchy, and you didn't even tell you. I didn't even
Speaker 2: tell you.
Speaker 5: I went home.
Speaker 2: I was like, I gotta get these fucking time.
Speaker 5: How did you not smell the urine in.
Speaker 3: The I don't have a good smeller even back then.
Speaker 5: So you've never had.
Speaker 2: Lisa was just born with poor eyesight, no smell.
Speaker 1: It's just But then after I learned it was Brigham
Speaker 1: Young's house with all of his wives, I'm like, how
Speaker 1: appropriate that I just peed on the floor.
Speaker 5: If you would have known that you made it, you
Speaker 5: would have pulled the lily too.
Speaker 2: I think it's hysterical.
Speaker 1: Okay, So the theme of now that we've bantered for
Speaker 1: a full forty minute, I wanted to know because everyone's like, what.
Speaker 2: Are Christmas traditions?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 1: I want to know who fucked up on Christmas? So
Speaker 1: the first uh I posted on the graand people wrote
Speaker 1: in really funny. I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time,
Speaker 1: but it's funny now. Christmas feuds I remember the very
Speaker 1: first time I realized Christmas wasn't magical any longer.
Speaker 2: Lisa, what happened?
Speaker 6: So we're at my mother in law's house with all
Speaker 6: of the uncles, aunts, cousins, and I go and sit
Speaker 6: down across from one of the cousins and she's talking
Speaker 6: about moving and I said, Oh, where are you moving?
Speaker 6: She says, Saint George to the condo. We have to know,
Speaker 6: my husband and his brother owned a condo together in
Speaker 6: Saint George, which was a vacation getaway for me. She's
Speaker 6: moving in unbeknownst to me, Like Dad didn't tell me, right,
Speaker 6: I was furious.
Speaker 5: Now you.
Speaker 2: I was, I think in high school.
Speaker 1: I was definitely in high school because I remember my
Speaker 1: one of my best friends was a really like she
Speaker 1: had a really cool style of painting, and I had
Speaker 1: her paint a horsehead for.
Speaker 3: Lisa, which is in Saint George by the way.
Speaker 1: While I was like, I I'm gonna give her this
Speaker 1: gift and like Christmas is fucking ruined, and that was
Speaker 1: like a stage where like Dad was just like king
Speaker 1: of like not telling Mom anything.
Speaker 2: So this was just the cherry on top of like
Speaker 2: the shit cake. Do you put cherries on cake?
Speaker 3: Icing? The ship?
Speaker 2: Icing on the cake?
Speaker 6: Cherry on top is usually on a Sunday. But anyway,
Speaker 6: going back to the.
Speaker 5: Leave it to her for her sweets.
Speaker 6: Yes, I was so mad that I had friends that
Speaker 6: lived across the street. Lauren and I went trapesing over
Speaker 6: there and we got knocker. The rest of the afternoon
Speaker 6: we just hung out over there.
Speaker 5: It got lit. Yeah, where was I You.
Speaker 3: Were with the cousins fuck and your dad?
Speaker 6: Yeah, because dad was not invited to the friend to
Speaker 6: the friend get together over it across the street.
Speaker 2: No, you're stuck here with the mos man.
Speaker 1: We're gonna go get lit because what we did yes
Speaker 1: time out for you.
Speaker 2: No, it was super messed up.
Speaker 1: And that was the first year that I realized like, wow,
Speaker 1: Christmas Day can be stressful and shit can go south.
Speaker 6: And we hadn't opened our gift chat. We were going
Speaker 6: to Grandma's for breakfast, then going home to up and gifts. No,
Speaker 6: I know, super fun.
Speaker 2: No, it wasn't fun at all. I got you a bench,
Speaker 2: I got.
Speaker 1: You a bench for where your bed was, and then
Speaker 1: I got you the horsehead painting and it was like
Speaker 1: not even I was like, wow, the first year that
Speaker 1: I've like put thought and time and money into gifts
Speaker 1: and we can't even enjoy them because of it was
Speaker 1: just so depressing.
Speaker 4: I think it was depressing because reopened gifts, so it's
Speaker 4: no matter what.
Speaker 2: No, it was depressing because of the condo situation.
Speaker 5: It was home.
Speaker 1: But now mom years later went and bought her own
Speaker 1: condo and now that horse painting is in that house.
Speaker 2: Symbolic full circle moment.
Speaker 1: It was Dad's favorite place to be Palm Springs or
Speaker 1: Saint George's like the equivalent of Palm Springs.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but just to call it the other Palmspring. That's
Speaker 6: how they did.
Speaker 5: Other Palm Springs. And it is but speaking of paintings in.
Speaker 4: There every time I go and I don't know why
Speaker 4: you thought to put it here, but in the in
Speaker 4: the primary bedroom, you go into the bathroom and as
Speaker 4: you take a leak, standing up, there's a picture that
Speaker 4: says enjoy the little things. And me and my dad
Speaker 4: talk about it, well, talked about it so often and
Speaker 4: it is still up, and every time I'm just like,
Speaker 4: all right, well.
Speaker 1: I know, like every time a man is taking he's
Speaker 1: like holding his dick.
Speaker 4: Holding my dick, ping, and then it's like, well, I'm
Speaker 4: doing this, I guess I'll read what's in front of me.
Speaker 5: Enjoy the little things. It's like and I looked at like,
Speaker 5: I didn't.
Speaker 4: Know you had a camera in here, but I guess
Speaker 4: more to have.
Speaker 5: This person cute somewhere else. We're moving it.
Speaker 2: One person's family feud.
Speaker 1: We had to call all the bars to get our
Speaker 1: parents and uncle's home so we could open press that
Speaker 1: that is a movie.
Speaker 5: That is that, that's the Grizzwold.
Speaker 1: I was like, that's fucking iconic, waking up being like
Speaker 1: where is everyone? They just fucked up at the bar
Speaker 1: down the street, and then they had to call all
Speaker 1: of them to locate the family uncle before food is served.
Speaker 1: He'd pack up leftovers for weekly meals before everyone ate.
Speaker 5: I'd hit him in his head. Yeah, so like you
Speaker 5: made your house.
Speaker 4: You maybe didn't get food because he needed food for
Speaker 4: next one.
Speaker 2: So he would like go through and pack up very comfortable.
Speaker 1: I think someone needs to go awareness is crazy. The
Speaker 1: uncle was jobless or something like are you okay? Because
Speaker 1: that doesn't seem normal or they just don't care. But like,
Speaker 1: I think it's important to teach people like you never
Speaker 1: go back for even seconds until everyone is eaten. Yes,
Speaker 1: got into it with my ex husband because he gifted
Speaker 1: me pre owned Lubetants first pair I ever got, first
Speaker 1: pair ever.
Speaker 2: I'm funny about second hand shoes.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, shoes don't I don't stuff scuffed bottoms, weird
Speaker 1: feet in the foot. Yeah, second hand shoes, second hand hats,
Speaker 1: it ain't happening.
Speaker 2: It's a no go.
Speaker 4: That's like, yeah, that's like getting secondhand like secondhand underwear.
Speaker 2: I think so too.
Speaker 5: Yeah not for me. Yeah, I wouldn't have gotten you that.
Speaker 1: My brother got so mad he threw the huge cooked
Speaker 1: turkey at the Christmas tree.
Speaker 3: No dinner is ruined.
Speaker 1: That's like such a dinner is served. Let me tell
Speaker 1: you that is a Clark Grizzly moment. Holy shit, where's
Speaker 1: the tilet?
Speaker 5: All right?
Speaker 1: Yes, that's fucking awesome. Now, I bet in the moment
Speaker 1: it was kind of disoriented.
Speaker 5: Well, yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Wonder why he felt the need to throw the trees.
Speaker 4: His mom was probably like poking at him and pushing
Speaker 4: all the wrong buttons.
Speaker 5: Have a dad.
Speaker 1: So my dad called my maternal grandmother a bitch, and
Speaker 1: my grandfather's squared up with him.
Speaker 2: Yo, that's pretty awesome.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I know.
Speaker 6: I think tensions can run high during the holidays, really.
Speaker 5: Yeah, because we're all broken stressed.
Speaker 1: Christmas is extremely stressful, and I think there's so much
Speaker 1: pressure on the day that if you're feeling off, because
Speaker 1: there are mornings you wake up and you feel off,
Speaker 1: and sometimes as you get older, those days are right
Speaker 1: on Christmas and you're like fuck yeah.
Speaker 5: Right, yeah.
Speaker 4: Because the girl who said I'm broken stressed, you should
Speaker 4: take you. You should just gift that to everybody with you.
Speaker 2: My gosh, it's so good.
Speaker 4: Yeah, whoever wrote in on the last one that said
Speaker 4: I'm broken stressed, print that out.
Speaker 5: Give it to everybody with a picture of you. Smiling
Speaker 5: and the thumbs up.
Speaker 4: I promise you I would frame or dated and that
Speaker 4: would be the best present I had ever.
Speaker 5: That's I would fucking die.
Speaker 3: I think so too. Or just give a a picture
Speaker 3: of yourself.
Speaker 5: That's what I'm saying. But not that says I'm broken,
Speaker 5: then you smiling? Those iconic.
Speaker 2: Mother in law's equal monsters.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to put this person's name when we
Speaker 1: post all of these things because I don't want her
Speaker 1: mother in law to know that I've never had an
Speaker 1: actual mother in law. Do you agree, mom, that mother
Speaker 1: in laws can be monsters.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't refer to mine as a monster.
Speaker 2: What would you refer to her as a monster?
Speaker 5: Like the cheese?
Speaker 3: We were just.
Speaker 6: Different different, Yes, very they were Mormon. I was not
Speaker 6: a Mormon, like we just had different upbringings.
Speaker 2: Yes, you were looked at as like the devil, oh.
Speaker 3: Black sheep, the red.
Speaker 2: The words. You were more of the black goat, you.
Speaker 4: Know, sad you were more like the out of place bull.
Speaker 5: Yeah, the bull in the train didn't like you.
Speaker 2: And it's fine.
Speaker 1: I haven't spoken to my mom in six months, no contact,
Speaker 1: but she will be at family Christmas.
Speaker 2: That's today. She's there with her right now. I want
Speaker 2: to know what goes down.
Speaker 5: Please write back in because here what I don't like
Speaker 5: that feeling.
Speaker 2: I don't either. I'd avoid I would definitely.
Speaker 4: But then avoiding makes it awkward and for other people
Speaker 4: because if you're talking to the mom and then she
Speaker 4: says something, you're put in this like the circle of tension.
Speaker 5: So at some point.
Speaker 4: They do need to just figure it out, because you
Speaker 4: can't ruin everybody else's holiday with your tension.
Speaker 1: Well, the only thing worse than having tension with someone
Speaker 1: is going with someone who has tension with someone.
Speaker 5: That's the worst.
Speaker 2: Second Hand tension is really intent.
Speaker 5: It's the worst.
Speaker 1: My dad was caught cheating on my mom and beat
Speaker 1: up by her brothers. Dad did not tell his family
Speaker 1: anything other than my mom has beat him up.
Speaker 2: So all day my mom sat with.
Speaker 1: A smile as my dad sat there bruised and broken,
Speaker 1: and the whole family was confused.
Speaker 5: Well, where were the brothers that beat him up smiling
Speaker 5: with the mom? Probably or at a different party, you
Speaker 5: fucking piece of ships.
Speaker 6: No, I wouldn't feel well, he wouldn't even be allowed
Speaker 6: at those festivities.
Speaker 5: I've seen videos on like a nine of of like.
Speaker 4: The sons of moms beating the ship out of the
Speaker 4: dude who like beat the mom.
Speaker 1: And you can see like a lot of fist fights
Speaker 1: on Christmas, a lot of fist fights.
Speaker 5: Do you think they were at the other house, not
Speaker 5: the mom's house with the uncles that beat him up.
Speaker 5: They're at his.
Speaker 4: Family's house because family wondering, like what's going on with him?
Speaker 5: And he's like, oh, well, she beat me up.
Speaker 1: Probably, But in my mind, they're all sitting around the
Speaker 1: dinner table and the dad has like a black eye
Speaker 1: and like a bruised lip and maybe like cast double casted.
Speaker 5: They're passing him, can't even eat.
Speaker 1: While the rest of the family is just all smiles,
Speaker 1: not giving one ship about ted, and.
Speaker 5: They're sitting right next to him acting all night nothing's
Speaker 5: ever happened.
Speaker 1: Exactly one year, my sister and I got into a
Speaker 1: full blown fistfight.
Speaker 2: She punched me first, I finished it. Damn you guys.
Speaker 1: I can't imagine just being like, it's Christmas, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go punch my sister in the face.
Speaker 2: You never know, Well, obviously.
Speaker 1: There's tension, but in my mind I have a scenario
Speaker 1: that's happening, you know, obvious happened, Lauren, you don't say clearly.
Speaker 1: So before we sign off, I was very interested. I
Speaker 1: love you, Mom coow Bella.
Speaker 3: My friend gave me this hat.
Speaker 2: It's cute. She gave it to you for Christmas. I
Speaker 2: love it.
Speaker 1: So I was very curious. We were on the subject
Speaker 1: of milk. Okay, last night for some odd reason. I
Speaker 1: was like, milk is so fucking weird an ocean. Now
Speaker 1: she used to love a milky. Now I can't get
Speaker 1: her to drink milk. And Landen says to me, you
Speaker 1: know that, like milk was on this huge campaign of
Speaker 1: like it makes your bones stronger, and like calcium does
Speaker 1: you good.
Speaker 2: Like you guys remember got Milk.
Speaker 8: It was strictly for milk, not even a company, just milk,
Speaker 8: not even a specific brand of milk, milk in itself, right,
Speaker 8: And they have like a listers with like milk milk's
Speaker 8: mustaches and like jeans and white little cutoff.
Speaker 5: Teeth with their mustache looking.
Speaker 2: Sexy with a glass of milk.
Speaker 3: And it was like, got milk, And.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I remember my dad saying if I didn't
Speaker 1: drink milk that like I would have breaky bones. Okay,
Speaker 1: And Landon said no, it was like strictly a ploy.
Speaker 1: It was like, how do we get people? We got
Speaker 1: all this cows. We've really messed up here. How do
Speaker 1: we get people to drink milk? And I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's so interesting. So I was thinking last night, I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: I need to remember that when we get to Palm Springs,
Speaker 1: I gotta get the cookie in the milk for Santa.
Speaker 2: I'm like, milk again.
Speaker 1: What where did that start? To leave milk and cookies
Speaker 1: for Santa Claus? So I google this, I google why.
Speaker 1: So there's a Dutch connection that in the past, the
Speaker 1: Netherlands would celebrate Christmas on December sixth, so on December fifth,
Speaker 1: the kids would leave out their shoes and wake up
Speaker 1: to their shoes being filled with treats. This would change
Speaker 1: over time and eventually lead to children leaving out cookies
Speaker 1: and milk for Santa instead. And I think I remember
Speaker 1: he goes by Center Claus. There's the Great Depression connection.
Speaker 1: In a time when many families struggled, Christmas was a
Speaker 1: bright spot. The families would ask their children to leave
Speaker 1: out milk and cookies for Santa to thank him for
Speaker 1: bringing gifts.
Speaker 2: This one doesn't make much sense to me. We're in
Speaker 2: the Great Depression.
Speaker 1: People are struggling to buy anything, and if they got
Speaker 1: milk and cookies, I think they're keeping it for themselves,
Speaker 1: not giving it to Santa Claus.
Speaker 2: And then comes we're back to.
Speaker 1: The gaut milk, the dairy connection, similar to the Christmas
Speaker 1: pickle tradition.
Speaker 2: I don't know what that is. Didn't care to look
Speaker 2: it up because it's not about that.
Speaker 1: This theory mentions that leaving milk and cookies out for
Speaker 1: Santa was a marketing ploy. The dairy industry was struggling
Speaker 1: in the early twentieth century, So how do you raise
Speaker 1: sales well by marketing that Santa drinks milk with cookies?
Speaker 5: That blew my mind. That adds up that that's the
Speaker 5: one that makes the most sense.
Speaker 3: Dude, Are we gonna put water in cookies now?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 1: No, I'm still giving him milk. But I wanted to
Speaker 1: know where that came from. And then it just it
Speaker 1: kind of piggybacked off of what Landon was saying.
Speaker 5: I'm like, just marketing.
Speaker 1: It's not like the gut milk was for Horizon or
Speaker 1: like Albertson's brand. It was strictly to get us to
Speaker 1: think that we needed to go out and buy any
Speaker 1: kind of.
Speaker 2: Milk, And now they did it with Santa Claus and
Speaker 2: it just stuck.
Speaker 5: Do you think people give Santa almond milk skip?
Speaker 3: Maybe?
Speaker 2: Yeah, they do because on the samea clause she.
Speaker 1: Goes, it's soy, I'm lactose intolerant, and he's like, yes,
Speaker 1: the milk's gone bad.
Speaker 2: Do you remember Tim Allan?
Speaker 5: Oh? I don't remember, but that's great.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure some people don't have dairy in their
Speaker 1: homes and they do give, and I'm sure Santa's pissed
Speaker 1: off about it.
Speaker 2: It's not as creamy.
Speaker 6: Speaking of we need to get a cute plate and
Speaker 6: cut for Santa's milk and cookies.
Speaker 1: We have that, mom, and it's a grinch and it's
Speaker 1: in these are just likes to buy shit.
Speaker 2: That's fight shit.
Speaker 3: But it's sad because we have nowhere to put it now.
Speaker 1: No, we have plenty of places. It's in Palm Springs.
Speaker 1: It's a grinch plate. We'll put the cookies on it.
Speaker 1: It's fine, all right. This is where the stress comes though.
Speaker 1: This is what I'm hoping on this day, strong, this
Speaker 1: day I hope that you guys are having a a
Speaker 1: calm and easy time. I hope that today you can
Speaker 1: take a moment and just be grateful for the thing
Speaker 1: that are currently present in your life, because it can
Speaker 1: become incredibly stressful, especially if you have kids. I read
Speaker 1: that you know, families for the past few years are
Speaker 1: still struggling to make ends meet and when holidays approach
Speaker 1: and you have to spend money and make it special
Speaker 1: for your kids. Sorry, I don't know where that came from.
Speaker 2: I just hope that today can be.
Speaker 1: Just peaceful for everybody, because it does get stressful and
Speaker 1: as you get older and the times change, and you know,
Speaker 1: we look around and what we thought was going to
Speaker 1: be our life is not and it does get very
Speaker 1: very difficult as you get older. So I today no
Speaker 1: one punched anybody. I hope that you didn't have to
Speaker 1: communicate with anyone you didn't want to. You didn't have
Speaker 1: to make amends on this day. You just got to
Speaker 1: be with who you wanted to be with. You didn't
Speaker 1: worry about the freaking gifts. You didn't worry about if
Speaker 1: you know, Sally didn't get the gift that she wanted,
Speaker 1: And just try to be peaceful, put on a good song.
Speaker 1: Today is just about taking a freaking load off. You know,
Speaker 1: we're going into a new year and my hope for
Speaker 1: everybody is that brighter days come, less stressful days are
Speaker 1: ahead of you. And I don't know why, I just
Speaker 1: got emotional. That was really fucking out of left field.
Speaker 1: And for those of you who are listening to the
Speaker 1: podcast today, Mary mother effing Christmas, God bless you. If
Speaker 1: you don't believe in that, May or higher power, bless
Speaker 1: you on this day and moving forward and.
Speaker 2: Happy happy holidays.
Speaker 1: Thank you all for listening to another episode and they
Speaker 1: give them La La Podcast. Enjoy the rest of you
Speaker 1: a week and we'll catch you next week.
Speaker 2: Bye m HM.