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Speaker 1: I can dig it. Nicky Glazer podcast, Thicky Glazzer Podcast.

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Speaker 1: He's Nikki. Thank you no uh my producer in Arizona.

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Speaker 1: Oh guys, I miss you. It feels like forever since

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Speaker 1: we finished out last week, and what a week it was.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much to everyone who listened to our

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Speaker 1: first week. Andrew and I seriously we're bummed out on

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Speaker 1: Saturday when we didn't have a podcast to do. So

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Speaker 1: I hope you're having as much fun as we are.

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Speaker 1: We're back for a week two, so excited Between you

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Speaker 1: and me. I am not sleeping very much, and I'm

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Speaker 1: okay with it. It's okay. I'm my skin doesn't look

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Speaker 1: as good as it does when I sleep a lot.

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Speaker 1: I um, I'm not really thinking as clearly. UM. I

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Speaker 1: think some people compare being um sleep like people have

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Speaker 1: done studies, people scientists. I think those are the ones

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Speaker 1: that do studies where where like people drive tired and

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Speaker 1: it's like the same or with like sleep deprivation, it's

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Speaker 1: the same as being drunk. And so I honestly feel

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Speaker 1: like I'm just drinking again. That's I feel drunk all

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Speaker 1: the time. A little bit that's not true, but kind of.

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Speaker 1: I also only have one contact in and sometimes I

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Speaker 1: just take one contact out just to feel a little

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Speaker 1: drunk because I it's been so long. That's also not true.

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Speaker 1: The other one in acid tone. Oh my god, we've

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Speaker 1: got so much feedback about that story. Really tell you

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Speaker 1: please sorry. Email the Nikki Glaser Podcast at gmail dot

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Speaker 1: com where people horrified and more people like you need

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Speaker 1: to do this. I just want everyone know it was

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Speaker 1: like ten or twelve years ago. So my eyes are fine,

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Speaker 1: But what did they say? A lot of people are

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Speaker 1: just grateful that you didn't go blind. Oh that's really sweet.

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Speaker 1: It's always it could happen at any moment, you know,

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Speaker 1: Like I watched the the that's a that's the movie

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Speaker 1: The Sound of Metal where the drummer loses his hearing. Guys,

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Speaker 1: appreciate the senses that you have. And to anyone who

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Speaker 1: is deaf out there, how are you listening to this

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Speaker 1: right now? I guess podcasts can be transcribed and there's

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Speaker 1: tons of transcription services, So shout out to everyone who's

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Speaker 1: reading this right now, who is death. I'm talking directly

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Speaker 1: to you. Um No, It's like I really it made

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Speaker 1: me appreciate my sight when that happened. Um, one of

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Speaker 1: my biggest fears of getting COVID was losing my sense

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Speaker 1: of smell or taste. I mean that that really was

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Speaker 1: my biggest fear with COVID, you know, aside from giving

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Speaker 1: it to someone, because I just I don't get the flu.

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Speaker 1: I've never out in the flu. I don't really get

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Speaker 1: sick that often. Knock on, knock on wood, knock on wood.

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Speaker 1: I'm not superstitious, except when that with that, well, I

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Speaker 1: guess I am, um, And so I wasn't really scared

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Speaker 1: of like dying from COVID, and I know maybe that's

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Speaker 1: in rational fear. Please don't write into the show and

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Speaker 1: tell me why I should be scared. I honestly tried

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Speaker 1: everything not to get it, but I just really didn't

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Speaker 1: want to lose my sense of spell or taste. And

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Speaker 1: people that lost it and it hasn't come back in

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Speaker 1: the right way or in a different way. That scared

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Speaker 1: me so much. Um. I love tasting things way too much,

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Speaker 1: and smell is also very important to me, even though

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Speaker 1: I don't like I just started wearing perfume like paras

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Speaker 1: Helton got me into perfume. Brag. I'm like friends with

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Speaker 1: her now or whatever. It's not a big deal. Um.

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Speaker 1: When I did a show with her that's coming out

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Speaker 1: at some point in the summer, I think, Um, back

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Speaker 1: in December, I went to Paris's house and shot a

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Speaker 1: little not a little thing, a long thing, and she

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Speaker 1: at one point in the middle, in between takes, she

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Speaker 1: like doused herself in this perfume and it smelled so

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Speaker 1: good and I was like, what is that and she

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Speaker 1: was like, it's my it's my new perfume. Um, objectify, No,

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Speaker 1: that's not what it's called. That's so funny. I literally

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Speaker 1: just thought I wasn't even trying to be funny. That

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Speaker 1: is what I thought it was called. Um, I forget

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Speaker 1: the name of it. Fuck, I wish I could go.

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Speaker 1: I'll find it between segments. So girls wondering. But the

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Speaker 1: thing was, I love that Parrishilton's wearing her own perfume,

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Speaker 1: that it's not the most expensive perfume, and you just

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Speaker 1: think that someone. I hate when celebrities make products or

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Speaker 1: endorsed products that they clearly do not wear themselves. And uh,

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Speaker 1: she's clearly not one of those people. Like Jennifer Aniston.

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Speaker 1: I did a joke about it on Conan. Jennifer Aniston

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Speaker 1: using a Veno products. I was like, she wouldn't wash

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Speaker 1: her asshole with a vino face wash, let alone put

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Speaker 1: it on her face. You know, like these people are

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Speaker 1: lying to you. Katie Perry and Halle Berry don't use

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Speaker 1: cover girl like wake up, you know. But Paris Aulton

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Speaker 1: really does use her own perfume and it smells so good.

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Speaker 1: So I she gave me a bunch of stuff and

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Speaker 1: I like wear it all the time. And the other

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Speaker 1: day a guy, um, we are like walking to set

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Speaker 1: and I was like, you smell fantastic. And I was

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Speaker 1: like it just like felt so good. You know. I

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Speaker 1: wasn't even anywhere close to him, and it just felt

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Speaker 1: so good. No one ever says that. You know, sometimes

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Speaker 1: I have a shampoo, I guess, and someone's really getting

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Speaker 1: in there. I never get smelled compliments, and it just

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Speaker 1: felt nice. Know what, do you wear a perfume? I

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Speaker 1: very rarely do I wear a perfume. I don't like

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Speaker 1: artificial sons. I just like regular bo um for yourself. Um,

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Speaker 1: I guess like you like bo for yourself? No, not

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Speaker 1: on me. I like the like muskiness of men. I

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Speaker 1: do like a light, flowery perfume on women. But just

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Speaker 1: when it's overbearing, it just makes me nauseous. Yes, I

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Speaker 1: I um, I believe. I talked about it with you

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Speaker 1: on our last show, but I agree with you. I

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Speaker 1: love perfume. I I just I question my own taste

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Speaker 1: so much that I can only wear perfume that other

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Speaker 1: women have deemed okay to wear because I don't trust that.

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Speaker 1: But now that I like myself more and I honestly

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Speaker 1: like I just am who I am, I've accepted a

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Speaker 1: lot more. If I like a smell, I don't care

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Speaker 1: if other girls don't, you know, Like, but I used

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Speaker 1: to just base everything base my smells and my outfits

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Speaker 1: and like everything off of like, oh she thinks it's cool,

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Speaker 1: I'll wear it or whatever. And now it's kind of

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Speaker 1: starts from within. But I, um, yeah, I love I

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Speaker 1: love that Paris Hilton. I'll get the fragrances to let

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Speaker 1: you know, because sometimes girls do need help. Sometimes we

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Speaker 1: don't know what smells good. And this one's like a

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Speaker 1: sexy good smell. I do know that. Um, there's one

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Speaker 1: there's one perfume that's very expensive that my friend Carlile Forrester,

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Speaker 1: who is like has the best taste in like sexy

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Speaker 1: things right, She's super sexy. She knows what turns men on.

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Speaker 1: Like everything she does turn spent on. She could like

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Speaker 1: fart and guys would get down on one knee to

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Speaker 1: not only propose, but get a whiff of that sweet,

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Speaker 1: sweet fart. It comes from an honest place. She's like

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Speaker 1: an honest sexy It doesn't seem like she's trying, you know. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: some people just are. Some women just are. She just

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Speaker 1: is and Bond fun. The Scent of Peace is the

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Speaker 1: name of it, and it's by Bond something. It's a

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Speaker 1: perfume that costs, like I think, I think I got

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Speaker 1: it for for a birthday because she was like I

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Speaker 1: can never afford it, but like, I love it so

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Speaker 1: much and I got it for and I I fucked

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Speaker 1: her after I did well. I had to suck the

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Speaker 1: girl at the testing counter because that's how hot this

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Speaker 1: this fragrances. I went down on her at the test encounter. Um,

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Speaker 1: because that's guys, go gaga for the scent to I

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Speaker 1: don't know why I haven't bought it, but I'm sticking

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Speaker 1: to my parents. And I think was banging on my door,

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Speaker 1: or maybe it's Andrew doing He's probably being on your

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Speaker 1: door to let you know he has a story in

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Speaker 1: his new segment coming up about smells. Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: no way, that's so um uh not ironic but um incidental. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: kiss Mett. I I don't know if it's that. I

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Speaker 1: want to just say though, that um one of my

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Speaker 1: listeners and my one of my new best friends. I

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Speaker 1: have a lot of best friends. Noah, you're one of them,

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Speaker 1: Andrews one of them. People always go you can have

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Speaker 1: a bunch of best friends. The word best, you know,

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Speaker 1: makes that impossible to have multiples, But I do. I

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Speaker 1: have top shelf best friends, and I add new ones

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Speaker 1: to it all the time, and you can be taken

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Speaker 1: off the shelf. But it's rare that that happens. And

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Speaker 1: I might not talk to you for a couple of

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Speaker 1: months or maybe even years, but you're still up there

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Speaker 1: wherever we talk, we can get right back at it.

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Speaker 1: And it happens instantly, almost instantly when I meet someone,

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Speaker 1: you know. When I met Andrew, it was within a

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Speaker 1: couple of minutes that he told me that he got

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Speaker 1: an AIDS test before he ever had sex because he

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Speaker 1: fingered a girl and he bites his fingernails, and that

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Speaker 1: to me someone who was that honest right out of

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Speaker 1: the gate. I was just like, I need you in

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Speaker 1: my life, Like that's what I need and UM, and

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Speaker 1: I'll send that to so many people I've met on

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Speaker 1: this show, the secret show that I can't talk about yet.

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Speaker 1: I am having the time of my life. I've made

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Speaker 1: so many friendships that maybe I'm delusional and I think

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Speaker 1: that they'll continue into the future after we wrap here

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Speaker 1: on the Cayman Islands. Um. Because there are a lot

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Speaker 1: of people on this show that do these things all

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Speaker 1: the time where they go on location and they just

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Speaker 1: work with different people, you know, like four times a

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Speaker 1: year they're on these big shows or movies, and you

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Speaker 1: like it's like summer camp, and then you all split

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Speaker 1: up and you don't see each other maybe again until

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Speaker 1: the next time. We're most likely for a couple of

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Speaker 1: years when you randomly get on the same show again.

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Speaker 1: And I don't I'm gonna try to keep up my

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Speaker 1: friendships because I feel like I've made the best ones,

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Speaker 1: especially with my hair and makeup team and my wardrobe team, UM,

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Speaker 1: because they're constantly with me. And one of them, UM,

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Speaker 1: I posted about on Instagram, Robin Diamond it is her

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Speaker 1: birthday today. She's my hair and makeup girl, and she

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Speaker 1: does both so well, even though usually you're either good

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Speaker 1: at one or the other, even if you have to

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Speaker 1: do them both. And she's just someone who's like so

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Speaker 1: nice and kind and funny, and just instantly I'm a

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Speaker 1: little bit gay for her. I gotta be honest, um,

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Speaker 1: I she's one of those people that exude sexiness too.

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Speaker 1: She makes me feel very comfortable. Last night she I

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Speaker 1: was in shoes last night, these uncomfortable shoes that it

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Speaker 1: looks so hot, like so worth it. I'm I'm one

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Speaker 1: of these women who like doesn't really understand why girls

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Speaker 1: wear heels until I put the mom and I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: so hot. I was in them standing for three hours

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Speaker 1: in place, one place, not walking around standing, which is

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Speaker 1: almost worse than walking three hours in these heels. Not

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Speaker 1: to mention, I had had two other shoots that day

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Speaker 1: in different heels, but these heels were especially brutal, and

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Speaker 1: my toes went not. My toes are numb today. But

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Speaker 1: this girl, when I finally was able to relax a

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Speaker 1: little bit, she was pulling my bunion and like torturing it,

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Speaker 1: which is all I've ever wanted was someone to just

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Speaker 1: twist it and yank it. And she loves feet. She

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Speaker 1: likes the smell of feet. She's like a foot freak.

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Speaker 1: I don't even get it. It's not even sexual thing.

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Speaker 1: She just loves feet. So I think I found my

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Speaker 1: life partner. Um it's her birthday today. She is very

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Speaker 1: special to me. Shout out to her. I also am

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Speaker 1: giving this as a present to her because I don't

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Speaker 1: have time to go actually shop for a present, and

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Speaker 1: I don't there's no like stores in town that I

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Speaker 1: know about, like Cayman's don't have. She knows all the

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Speaker 1: stores and what they have, and if she wanted it,

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Speaker 1: she would already have it. There's like it's seriously, You're

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Speaker 1: like in a resort here where it's like one shop. Um.

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Speaker 1: So I'm going to write her a nice note. That's

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Speaker 1: what I usually do for my friends on their birthdays,

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Speaker 1: as I write them like a long letter telling them

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Speaker 1: how I feel about them. Um, but without being said

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Speaker 1: like I yesterday was really you know, we're halfway through

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Speaker 1: this show. People are tired, people are feeling stressed at times.

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Speaker 1: People are feeling like, you know, like even though we're

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Speaker 1: having the best time, I'm having the best time of

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Speaker 1: my goddamn life, like the best. This is the best

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Speaker 1: time I've ever had. Last time I had this much

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Speaker 1: fun was Dancing with the Stars. Even though everyone knows

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Speaker 1: that was a very tumultuous time for me, I still

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Speaker 1: loved it so much. I love making a TV show

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Speaker 1: in this intense like bubble of a world. It's all

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Speaker 1: I want to do in life. I truly love it.

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Speaker 1: And but it's tensions were everyone was p ms and

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Speaker 1: yesterday in my in my little nest of women in

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Speaker 1: my room, and so I had all of us joined

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Speaker 1: hands in a trust circle. And it seems stupid, but

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Speaker 1: I'll let us, you know, like a prayer, including Andrew

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Speaker 1: to these women. And then Andrew about just how you know,

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Speaker 1: when we feel, like when we're angry about feeling like

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Speaker 1: we or people don't appreciate us, or people are mad

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Speaker 1: at us, or I didn't do this thing and they

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Speaker 1: think I did this thing, and all this stuff. It's like,

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Speaker 1: just know who you are, know your intentions. You cannot

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Speaker 1: control other people's. Please let it go, don't try to

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Speaker 1: change it, don't try to correct people, and let them

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Speaker 1: know the real you. You know, the real you I

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Speaker 1: know the real you. Let's just accept that in situations

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Speaker 1: that are high stress, fault and tension is going to

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Speaker 1: fall on other people because it's too hard to accept

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Speaker 1: it yourself. So people who aren't working on themselves, it

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Speaker 1: tends to go outward. Even people that are working on themselves,

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Speaker 1: you blame other people. You know. It's like, fuck, my

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Speaker 1: phone is broken and you like throw it and it's

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Speaker 1: like it's not about your phone, you know, like we

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Speaker 1: all do this. But I just had a good, nice

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Speaker 1: pep talk. And I mean, obviously I don't think it

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Speaker 1: did anything, but it was just so nice to be

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Speaker 1: with a group of people that I've only known less

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Speaker 1: than a month and we can all join hands and

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Speaker 1: say I love you and like hug and kiss and um,

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Speaker 1: and then like just all go down on each other

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Speaker 1: in a circle. And I don't know why I keep

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Speaker 1: saying that Andrew wasn't there for that part. Um. I

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Speaker 1: can't wait to get Andrew in here and talk to him.

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Speaker 1: He is rearing to go today, we both are. We

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Speaker 1: missed this so much. Noah, did you miss it? Of

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Speaker 1: course I did. I was so confused about what day

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Speaker 1: it was. I was just like lost. I was I

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Speaker 1: felt like I was spinning in a circle. I can't

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Speaker 1: believe people do a weekly podcast like I. I don't

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Speaker 1: want that kind of podcast, and I won't settle for

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Speaker 1: that kind of podcast. I need a daily podcast. And

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Speaker 1: we're back today. It's Monday. Andrew Collin is coming up next.

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Speaker 1: Can't wait? Stay here, I and or back. Andrew Collin

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Speaker 1: is here with us. Say Andrew, what's going on? Good morning?

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Speaker 1: Good morning? How do you sleep last night? Buddy? I

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Speaker 1: I've already talked to you this morning, but I did

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Speaker 1: not ask you how you slept, even though I wanted to.

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Speaker 1: I go listen, save it for the body. How did

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Speaker 1: you sleep? I slept, well, it was one of those sleeps.

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Speaker 1: It was a long day yesterday. I don't know if

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Speaker 1: you spoke about it, because I can come into the

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Speaker 1: dark day and I always feel, yeah, Andrew's working on

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Speaker 1: my show now. Yeah. So I helped right for you,

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Speaker 1: and then I also helped bring you tea or coffee

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Speaker 1: wrongly too, I might add incorrectly. You gave me a

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Speaker 1: black coffee yesterday with Stevia in it, and I was

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Speaker 1: just like, what the hell is you? Okay, First of all,

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Speaker 1: you you put Stevia in everything everything, How dare me exactly?

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Speaker 1: Stevia only in coffee with milk in it. I would

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Speaker 1: never have it with black with stevia. Stevia is a

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Speaker 1: thing that is uh only it's the best. Like, I

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Speaker 1: don't want things sweetened that are just like watery, and

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Speaker 1: black coffee's watery, so I need like a milk in

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Speaker 1: it to make it sweetened. Otherwise I just want black

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Speaker 1: coffee plain and simple. I mean, you know, now you

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Speaker 1: sound like I'm trying to you know, you sound like

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Speaker 1: a diva. People are going to People have written me

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Speaker 1: and said, you really mean to Andrew, and I'm like, learn,

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Speaker 1: you don't know how much better I've gotten. And a

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Speaker 1: little of his tongue in cheek, but that's because I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to tell him with my tongue in my cheek

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Speaker 1: to look leave the room. I chew my tongue cheek.

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Speaker 1: You chew your skin inside your mouth at all? Never once? No,

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Speaker 1: That's all I do. Unless I have like a loose

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Speaker 1: piece and I try to grab it. But I mean,

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Speaker 1: that's that hasn't happened for a while. You're what are

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Speaker 1: you chewing on? I don't know. There's some I don't

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Speaker 1: know what's inside my mouth, but I'm chewing it. You

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Speaker 1: have a lot of habits like that. Um, I've been

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Speaker 1: biting my nails like crazy, dude. It's like, and I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to break you of it. I don't. I just

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Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know the approach Noah and approaches.

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Speaker 1: I can handle it. I'm a grown man. I'm forty.

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Speaker 1: I don't need to be told every time I'm biting

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Speaker 1: my nails. You don't. But like my Okay, keep keep

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Speaker 1: talking your thing. It's your O C. D thing with me.

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Speaker 1: You like you put your things on the me and

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Speaker 1: so if I'm biting my nails, You're right, it's my

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Speaker 1: thing that I don't. You know what. I'm trying to

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Speaker 1: look out for you and I want you to look professional.

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Speaker 1: This is not a man. This picture that is very

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Speaker 1: embarrassing that you're showing Noah right now. Yes, this is

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Speaker 1: what you look like when you do it, Andrew, I'm

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Speaker 1: trying you need to see it. It's like, it's like

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Speaker 1: we need to we need to know what it looks like.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes we don't know what we look like when we're

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Speaker 1: doing our anxious tick. And I'm I'm I do it too,

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Speaker 1: man Like, I just want you to not be chewing

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Speaker 1: on your It just you know, gives, it makes it gives. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm not used to being a professional setting, and I

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Speaker 1: get it. If I'm chewing on my nails and I'm

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Speaker 1: looking like I'm eating my hand in his mouth, Noah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, did you see that picture? No, I don't

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Speaker 1: understand if I'm chewing on my nails, why my knuckles

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Speaker 1: are also in my mouth. That's what I'm wondering. It

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Speaker 1: looks like you're trying to eat your tires. I'm getting

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00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:53,000
Speaker 1: so much anxiety from seeing that. What you say, I'm

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Speaker 1: getting so much anxiety. And that's what I'm saying it like,

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Speaker 1: it just feel like it projects someone that I know

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Speaker 1: you aren't. I mean, I know we all struggle with anxiety,

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00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:04,520
Speaker 1: but it's as if you're constantly telling everyone in the

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Speaker 1: room that's with you that I don't feel like I

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00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:10,960
Speaker 1: belong here and or I I am nervous about this.

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Speaker 1: It just I want you're someone who is so good

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Speaker 1: at what you do. I want you to project an

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Speaker 1: air of I belong here and I'm supposed to be here,

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Speaker 1: and this isn't making me nervous. I'm good enough, you know.

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Speaker 1: And I am asking you right now when you are

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Speaker 1: biting your hand, do you want me to just go

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Speaker 1: like gently, just like tap you and not make a

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Speaker 1: big deal of it, but just go like that. I

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Speaker 1: think I'm just in a in a situation where, like

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Speaker 1: I wasn't expecting to write on this show, or be involved,

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Speaker 1: or be in some kind of what's it called a

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Speaker 1: control room, So it's all very foreign to me. I'm

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Speaker 1: not in the control room with you, and so none

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Speaker 1: of the times I've called you out, I've been in

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Speaker 1: the control room. No. No, But I'm telling you why

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Speaker 1: that picture that we just saw it was from the

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Speaker 1: control room that was taken by one of the producers. Picture. Yes,

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Speaker 1: the picture. Now I'm starting to buy my nails because

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Speaker 1: I wonder where it's coming from, maybe someone correcting me

365
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Speaker 1: saying picture. I know, I'm I don't help. I'm very

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Speaker 1: aware that I probably like, don't bite your nails. Also,

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Speaker 1: don't say picture like a fucking idiot. I'm sorry I

368
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Speaker 1: criticize you so much. I really am just trying to

369
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Speaker 1: know I get it. I'm not I'm obviously to myself.

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Speaker 1: I don't like I'm tongue in cheeking right now. But

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Speaker 1: M to a point, but no, No, My point is like,

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Speaker 1: so I think I drink a lot of coffee to

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Speaker 1: stay up, and I'm kind of you know, you know,

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Speaker 1: I had something to complain about, but it's like, uh,

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Speaker 1: you asked how I slept. I was very tired, but

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Speaker 1: I don't want to say I'm tired because you're working

377
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Speaker 1: a thousand times harder than me on this show. But

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00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,760
Speaker 1: you're also time might be going faster for you because

379
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Speaker 1: you're doing something. There is something to like waiting on

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Speaker 1: someone else to be performing on camera where it's like

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Speaker 1: what do I do, like with my crazy brain that

382
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Speaker 1: just needs to like do something, So then I just

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Speaker 1: start biting my nails and I can just get you

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Speaker 1: something else. I really think maybe a fidget spin or

385
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Speaker 1: just some kind of ball, like when you had that

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00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:06,360
Speaker 1: stress ball for a while, you were just that Yeah,

387
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Speaker 1: God damn it. I knew you were gonna beat me

388
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Speaker 1: to it, so I just got to I was gonna

389
00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:12,640
Speaker 1: have a little bit of a longer intro to that joke,

390
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,639
Speaker 1: but I knew you were on it, so I was like,

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Speaker 1: I gotta get it out. Oh man, No, but you

392
00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 1: really um, I remember, I'm gonna get you something. I'm

393
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:22,399
Speaker 1: gonna look into this because I do not think you

394
00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:25,000
Speaker 1: should be chewing your nails down anymore because it leads.

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Speaker 1: It's just it's not nice to your nails. I want

396
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,560
Speaker 1: you to be nice to your body. I do the

397
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,000
Speaker 1: same thing. Like you saw me picking my um. I

398
00:20:32,040 --> 00:20:35,119
Speaker 1: had a dry elbow and it had like skin on

399
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:38,399
Speaker 1: it that was just so satisfying to pick off. And

400
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,879
Speaker 1: Andrew was like stop, and I was like, and I

401
00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:43,840
Speaker 1: said to him, Andrew, I'm not done, and I would

402
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,400
Speaker 1: let you know what I'm done, and I was able

403
00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:46,800
Speaker 1: to go. You can say that to meet you about

404
00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:48,639
Speaker 1: your nails, like I want this piece of skin. I

405
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,439
Speaker 1: need to get it. I understand that urgency. Everyone listening

406
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:56,399
Speaker 1: understands the urgency to like finish your anxiety. Uh you know,

407
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Speaker 1: I mean, I wonder when biting my nail started, Like everyone,

408
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:01,399
Speaker 1: I'm sure how like a star point. It's probably like

409
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 1: my parents divorce or whatever, and it's a weird thing,

410
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:11,080
Speaker 1: like where are you gonna be talking when they start

411
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,600
Speaker 1: to get along finally again, when they get back together,

412
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:17,280
Speaker 1: I'll stop biting my nails in the ground. There's a

413
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:21,920
Speaker 1: strong chance but I Jesus, I mean there is a

414
00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:24,600
Speaker 1: strong chance because everyone dies and everyone does die, but

415
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 1: sooner don't. But anyway, so yeah, so uh it just

416
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:32,200
Speaker 1: shows that we're like fucking and like I'm a human being.

417
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,320
Speaker 1: I should be able to go, don't eat your own

418
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:37,000
Speaker 1: like a dog. Yeah, when you do it, you really

419
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:40,119
Speaker 1: don't know that you're doing it, like every time I

420
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:42,600
Speaker 1: catch you you like, But but I relate to that

421
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:45,000
Speaker 1: so much. There's so many nervous I used to pick

422
00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:48,520
Speaker 1: my skin on my face like I had on my

423
00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:50,840
Speaker 1: face and I would bleed. I would go on stage,

424
00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:53,400
Speaker 1: I couldn't help myself. Would be in the wings when

425
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:54,920
Speaker 1: you go on stage, and there would be a piece

426
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:56,840
Speaker 1: of skin on like a scab because I used to

427
00:21:56,880 --> 00:22:00,240
Speaker 1: have terrible skin because I wasn't eating enough and just

428
00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:02,120
Speaker 1: it was and I would pick it and it would

429
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:05,280
Speaker 1: start bleeding and I would have blood plushing out of

430
00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:07,840
Speaker 1: my face as I walked on stage. It was like, hey, everyone, like,

431
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,640
Speaker 1: I understand picking. And there are a lot of listeners

432
00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:12,680
Speaker 1: out there who have either trick it till a mania,

433
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 1: which is where you pull out your hair or you

434
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:18,440
Speaker 1: uh pick that a wrestling match. Yeah, trick it till

435
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:28,199
Speaker 1: a mania. Um, I don't even know anything about wrestling

436
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:32,320
Speaker 1: to yeah, I know. I wanted to make like an

437
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:36,960
Speaker 1: extended joke about it, like you know it's not real,

438
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:44,240
Speaker 1: yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's all it's all set up. Yeah.

439
00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:45,879
Speaker 1: I mean, we have no free will, so you're just

440
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:47,800
Speaker 1: picking your face you don't have I mean I was

441
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,480
Speaker 1: I used to pick my face, you know, I have

442
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:52,680
Speaker 1: tons of just when I chug things out of anxiety,

443
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:55,600
Speaker 1: I eat fast out of anxiety. If I was if

444
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:57,840
Speaker 1: I saw a videotape of myself. I mean, sometimes I'm

445
00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,919
Speaker 1: on set, like on camera, and like when I do

446
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 1: to Tell the Truth that show on ABC, there will

447
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:05,560
Speaker 1: be times I'm watching it and I'm like, Glazer, you're

448
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:07,720
Speaker 1: on TV, Like my face will drop. There will be

449
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:10,320
Speaker 1: this like natural nous that comes out where I'm like,

450
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,240
Speaker 1: you forget you're on TV and you're doing something that's

451
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:14,960
Speaker 1: like a nervous thing where I'm like either talking to

452
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,400
Speaker 1: myself or like my eyes are darting around, and it's

453
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,480
Speaker 1: like we all do these things that if we saw

454
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:21,919
Speaker 1: we'd be like, oh my god, I look like that

455
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 1: when I'm doing that. So I just I just don't

456
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 1: want you to have to no on your skin. No,

457
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:29,680
Speaker 1: I'm gonna try not to not look the first time

458
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:31,760
Speaker 1: we met. If I never nod, I wouldn't be here

459
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:36,240
Speaker 1: today because I nod when I was fifteen and I

460
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:38,600
Speaker 1: fingered a girl and I thought I got aids from it,

461
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 1: so I got any So I guess in a way,

462
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 1: if I never nod, i'd never be here. So there's

463
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 1: a positive there no knowledge knowledge sleep. In the last minute,

464
00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:56,040
Speaker 1: did you did you sleep well? I did sleep well

465
00:23:56,040 --> 00:24:00,320
Speaker 1: because I was very I was exhausted. I'm also like, yeah, yeah,

466
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,320
Speaker 1: that's it. I did not. I slept well when I

467
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,560
Speaker 1: finally got to sleep. But um, I just have so

468
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 1: much adrenaline being here, just like making the show and

469
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,840
Speaker 1: meeting all these people and just like wanting to like

470
00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:18,880
Speaker 1: I don't sleep. Sometimes I'm like, but there's better things

471
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 1: to do, Like there's there's hanging Like it's better to

472
00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:24,000
Speaker 1: hang out, and that mate leads me to losing my

473
00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 1: voice because I'm just like, I just want to hang

474
00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 1: out and talk. And I love hearing that from you

475
00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:30,760
Speaker 1: because you have said before like I just want to

476
00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 1: get back to my sleep because what's happening in my

477
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 1: sleep is more exciting to what happened. Yeah, sleep for

478
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,760
Speaker 1: me is like a what I do when I'm depressed.

479
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:40,240
Speaker 1: I just want to go back into that world. Thanks

480
00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:43,000
Speaker 1: for pointing that out. That's a really good point. My

481
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 1: life now is better than you really do, because that's

482
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,520
Speaker 1: an interesting thing. When I'm depressed, all I want to

483
00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:51,200
Speaker 1: do is sleep because it's an escape from the hell

484
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:54,639
Speaker 1: that is waking hours of wanting to die every second,

485
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 1: or like wanting or of being feeling not good enough

486
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,240
Speaker 1: and just not being able to escape it, and wanting

487
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:03,000
Speaker 1: to have something like being able to chew off my

488
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:04,800
Speaker 1: hand that could soothe me. And I just don't have

489
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,640
Speaker 1: that anymore because my skin is so perfect, so there's

490
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:08,680
Speaker 1: nothing to pick just kidding. I got his z it

491
00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:13,440
Speaker 1: um yesterday. Yeah what you thought? What I thought? It

492
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,520
Speaker 1: was a cold look at that. That's a ZiT and

493
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:20,200
Speaker 1: I got it. I get it. Shut up. Yesterday, my

494
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,359
Speaker 1: makeup artis in front of everyone. I go, I got

495
00:25:22,560 --> 00:25:24,399
Speaker 1: I got my first blendish everyone. I was making a

496
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 1: joke and she goes, oh, it's happy's She was like, Nick,

497
00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:31,040
Speaker 1: it's definitely happy. She was joking, But she's like, I

498
00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 1: didn't have a tone of joking. And I go can

499
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:36,440
Speaker 1: you please, like say that's a joke, because I don't.

500
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:38,680
Speaker 1: First of all, there's nothing wrong with having her bees,

501
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:41,600
Speaker 1: but I do not have it, and I probably have

502
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:43,399
Speaker 1: some version of it because I think I've had a

503
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:46,000
Speaker 1: cold sore when I was like, you know, fifteen years ago,

504
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:49,639
Speaker 1: I think I had no. I mean, yes, I had

505
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:52,239
Speaker 1: stuck dicks before, but like, I don't. I've never had

506
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 1: a Herbie's up, right, But that being said, probably gonna

507
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,359
Speaker 1: get it eventually, not scared of it. Whatever if you

508
00:25:57,440 --> 00:26:01,160
Speaker 1: have it, No, no, no judge mint. If I did

509
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:03,159
Speaker 1: have Herbie's, I honestly would probably talk about and be like,

510
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:06,280
Speaker 1: I'm having a Herbie's outbreak. I literally don't judge that.

511
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:09,320
Speaker 1: But it wasn't, And so I was like, can you please,

512
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 1: because I'm trying to, you know, get laid, So I

513
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 1: don't want her screaming to the entire crew and everyone

514
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,040
Speaker 1: that you know, I have herbies, even if it's as

515
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 1: a joke, because jokes we all know come from a place, Yeah, exactly.

516
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:34,639
Speaker 1: Trigger mania, trickle tickle mania, tickle triggered mania. Um, alright,

517
00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:36,679
Speaker 1: let's get to the news. Let's do it. Are you

518
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:46,879
Speaker 1: ready for it? Yeah? I'm ready? What are the headlines

519
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:51,440
Speaker 1: this morning? Oh man, we got some great headlines. Yeah,

520
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:53,120
Speaker 1: I'd love to share them with you if I could

521
00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:54,920
Speaker 1: just pull them up real quick. You know, I used

522
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:57,160
Speaker 1: to go through the headlines that we'd compile and think

523
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,120
Speaker 1: about and pick out the ones I wanted. And now

524
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,919
Speaker 1: I'm really enjoying something that came from my laziness of

525
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:05,400
Speaker 1: not wanting to not having time to look them over

526
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 1: and just allowing you to pick them has now led

527
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:10,280
Speaker 1: to it's more fun for me to like find out stuff.

528
00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:12,080
Speaker 1: And I do read so much news that most of

529
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 1: the time I know the story. Also, there's such a

530
00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:17,840
Speaker 1: relief to hearing you say that, because a lot of

531
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:20,960
Speaker 1: times I'm afraid that I'm picking the wrong thing, because

532
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 1: you are usually so um specific in particular what you

533
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:30,960
Speaker 1: like to the point where it can be paralyzing for me.

534
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:34,679
Speaker 1: Just uh gnaw on that hand and get through it.

535
00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,920
Speaker 1: Let's do it. I have nothing to not laugh. Okay, Well,

536
00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:41,400
Speaker 1: he is literally holding up his phone with two stomps

537
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:46,760
Speaker 1: bleeding stumps. Dude, what if you literally lost both of

538
00:27:46,760 --> 00:27:48,879
Speaker 1: your arms in some kind of horrific car accident, what

539
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:53,680
Speaker 1: would you start chewing on? Uh? I'm not flexible. Enough.

540
00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:56,479
Speaker 1: I have chewed. I have chewed on my toes before

541
00:27:56,520 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 1: when I was a kid. I uh, I bait my

542
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 1: big I love your honesty, Andrew, thank you so much

543
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,399
Speaker 1: for always being you, but I did. I think you're welcome,

544
00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 1: but I used to. But it's not. It doesn't bring

545
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,680
Speaker 1: me to happiness. I think my senior just too far

546
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,199
Speaker 1: away from my brain and it doesn't connect. Like my

547
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,680
Speaker 1: hands too hard to get to I get it. I mean,

548
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:19,919
Speaker 1: it's wild to bite your totes. I'll compare it to

549
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:22,359
Speaker 1: being on top during sex. I can't enjoy it as

550
00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 1: much because I'm doing too much work, whereas your hand

551
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 1: is right there. It's like being on bottom and it

552
00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 1: just is. You can just get it easier, and you

553
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,520
Speaker 1: can enjoy the taste of your hand better than you

554
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:34,160
Speaker 1: can enjoy the taste of your foot, because if you're

555
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,919
Speaker 1: eating your foot, you're like, actually, you're straining muscles that

556
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: oh for sort, for sure, especially with my hips. Um So,

557
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:44,960
Speaker 1: so let's get into the news. The first story here.

558
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,520
Speaker 1: I hope. First of all, I hope everyone's having a

559
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:49,479
Speaker 1: great time out there. God, this this, I did this.

560
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:52,360
Speaker 1: You trying to win them over before you do news,

561
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,840
Speaker 1: which is not even like, what are you trying to what?

562
00:28:55,640 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: I hope everyone's having swells? Swells? What does that mean?

563
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,920
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I hope you guys haven't swells out there,

564
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: boys and girls? And uh yeah, So the study finds

565
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,800
Speaker 1: that smelling like an old person is a thing and

566
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:17,200
Speaker 1: has nothing to do with your hygiene. That isn't that

567
00:29:17,240 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 1: reassuring for you to know? Well, it's funny because it

568
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:25,280
Speaker 1: starts at forty that's what the study says that you have. Um, okay,

569
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:27,200
Speaker 1: I mean I thought it was mothballs. I thought old

570
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:31,960
Speaker 1: people just love mothballs. What are mothballs? Prevent months from

571
00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 1: eating your clothing? I guess they make months like sickened.

572
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:44,680
Speaker 1: And so it feels like a great depression like past situation. Yeah,

573
00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:47,680
Speaker 1: who's dealing with moss? I don't. I don't know, but

574
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:53,000
Speaker 1: um yeah, that's that's so true. I don't know. All right,

575
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:54,920
Speaker 1: So let me tell you a little bit about the smell.

576
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:57,000
Speaker 1: Things that change it. Smell can be because of a

577
00:29:57,080 --> 00:30:02,760
Speaker 1: chemical compound called to not an anial. I don't last

578
00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:09,240
Speaker 1: because as a lady who likes a little I don't

579
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 1: want to hear about not anal. To nine anal isn't

580
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 1: water soluble, so can't be scrubbed off the skin when

581
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:25,520
Speaker 1: you wash. It's caused by Omega's seven. Like I try,

582
00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:28,040
Speaker 1: but in my hands don't smell, but the rest of

583
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:31,600
Speaker 1: my body sure does. It caused by Omega's seven. I

584
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:36,400
Speaker 1: didn't even know when people smell. I do too. It

585
00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:39,440
Speaker 1: reminds me of my grandma and like her like rubbing

586
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 1: my back and laying on her lap and her drawing

587
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 1: like animals on my back and me trying to guess

588
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:46,720
Speaker 1: what the animal is. Dude, I have the same memory

589
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 1: of my grandpa. He used to blow me. Oh my god,

590
00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:54,000
Speaker 1: an animal. You have to guess what kind of animal

591
00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:56,520
Speaker 1: he was blowing you as it was always a giraffe.

592
00:30:57,120 --> 00:31:02,880
Speaker 1: He was taller than me. He definitely didn't need on

593
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:08,800
Speaker 1: that neck. No, it's short necked raff, a short nuck

594
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 1: to raff. Wouldn't even joke on my dick. Somebody has

595
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:18,400
Speaker 1: a little child, You're like, is it a short neck wraff? Girl?

596
00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:25,440
Speaker 1: Your grandpa he's probably rolling in his in the deed

597
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:28,840
Speaker 1: um Omega seven? Fat? Did you know it even goes

598
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:31,720
Speaker 1: up to seven fatty acids breaking out on the skin

599
00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:37,959
Speaker 1: due to oxes? Oh wow, that I'm skipping over that

600
00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 1: sentence too. There's a lot of sentences like yeah, so

601
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:43,600
Speaker 1: what I'm waring is that I can say huge words,

602
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:46,840
Speaker 1: I can't say any of these words. So yeah, so

603
00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: your skin essentially as breaking down. And so it's just

604
00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,840
Speaker 1: an unavoidable smell, the old person smell. I Um, I

605
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 1: just I don't mind it, you know, like the things

606
00:31:57,920 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 1: that happened when you get older, when you really get

607
00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 1: old older, you know, Like I was, the huge talking

608
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 1: point of my next special is going to be aging

609
00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:13,520
Speaker 1: as a woman, and how like being uh unfuckable is

610
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 1: an inevitability if you live long enough. There are lots

611
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:20,480
Speaker 1: of inevitabilities. Everyone's trying to Always women especially are trying

612
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:24,840
Speaker 1: to stay like attractive to men, to like because men

613
00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 1: rule the world and them wanting to fuck you gives

614
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,360
Speaker 1: you more power and freedom and safety and all the

615
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 1: things that we want as women. At least that's how

616
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,440
Speaker 1: I see it. And so women want to stay attractive

617
00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:37,920
Speaker 1: to get love, and but it's inevitable you're going if

618
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:40,040
Speaker 1: you live to be ninety, there's no way you're gonna

619
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:45,880
Speaker 1: be ninety and be hot list. It doesn't mean you're

620
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 1: not going to fuck, but it just means that, like

621
00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 1: most men will not desire your body, your expectations have

622
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 1: to be different the older you get you and and

623
00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,480
Speaker 1: the thing is, it just seems to be that way.

624
00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:59,840
Speaker 1: There are so few women that are elderly that you

625
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,680
Speaker 1: think are trying to be someone other than themselves. You

626
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,680
Speaker 1: just accepted eventually, which is such a godsend as you

627
00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 1: do your weird old woman smell. And by the way,

628
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:10,520
Speaker 1: if you want to avoid that old women smell. I

629
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 1: found the perfume that I was talking about, and it's

630
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,840
Speaker 1: called Electrify by Paras Hilton. It's my favorite scent. It's

631
00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:17,600
Speaker 1: the only one I wear. Um. I thought it was

632
00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:19,840
Speaker 1: called Objectify, which I think is going to be my

633
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:23,080
Speaker 1: scent when I finally release one, but it's called Electrified

634
00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: by Bears Hulton. Just to follow up on that next story,

635
00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 1: it is interesting just to go back to that point,

636
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:31,240
Speaker 1: like when my mom got divorced from my dad and

637
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: she was like, fifty do you want If you're like

638
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:36,880
Speaker 1: in kind of a smallish town, the only guys you

639
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:40,360
Speaker 1: can date are like seventy that would date a fifty

640
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:45,160
Speaker 1: year old point and six year old like I. My

641
00:33:45,320 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 1: pool also is like a decade older than me. It's

642
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:49,959
Speaker 1: just the way it is. It just becomes that. I mean,

643
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:51,600
Speaker 1: you're dating a girl is a decade younger than you,

644
00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 1: decade and a half younger than you. Yeah, and I

645
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:58,000
Speaker 1: mean my pool, my pool has only been bigger though

646
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:00,520
Speaker 1: for some reason, I don't know what's going on. TikTok

647
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:04,040
Speaker 1: couple gives a new meaning to puppy love. Jenna Phillips,

648
00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:08,319
Speaker 1: What does that meanetting better? Jenny? Jenna Phillips is a

649
00:34:08,360 --> 00:34:12,359
Speaker 1: puppy impersonator with over a hundred thousand TikTok followers. Her

650
00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:16,160
Speaker 1: boyfriend Lorenzo accepts her love language of being a puppy

651
00:34:16,239 --> 00:34:18,799
Speaker 1: and loving praise in this way, she loves to hear

652
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:21,799
Speaker 1: your good girl and good job. The twenty one year

653
00:34:21,840 --> 00:34:23,759
Speaker 1: old has turned pretending to be a puppy and there

654
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:27,240
Speaker 1: are main source of income through only fans and quitter

655
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:31,160
Speaker 1: career as an optation. Okay, I love the story girl.

656
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:36,640
Speaker 1: Do you do you? I love a girl that Okay,

657
00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:39,280
Speaker 1: I'm seeing a video of it right now. Noah, please

658
00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 1: play it? Hold on, my app is up one second.

659
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,799
Speaker 1: Do you think this set back? This is very hot?

660
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:47,680
Speaker 1: Does this set back women know at all? No, it

661
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:50,399
Speaker 1: actually empowers them. She's just she's being weird and she's

662
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,160
Speaker 1: doing what she likes to do. He's putting a chain

663
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 1: around her neck. She is sitting in a dog bed talking.

664
00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:58,600
Speaker 1: She's very beautiful, and now she's doing an interview from

665
00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:01,400
Speaker 1: her dog bed in her cage. Said, women love this stuff.

666
00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:04,279
Speaker 1: I I, in particular a lot of the porn I

667
00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:07,759
Speaker 1: watched as women in cages with Leasha's on like exactly this.

668
00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 1: There's nothing different about this except that he's actually she's

669
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:14,759
Speaker 1: like maybe barking and stuff. But I really like men

670
00:35:14,920 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 1: and and good girl. I mean Carla Forrester, who I

671
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 1: name dropped before she gave me a joke because we

672
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:23,759
Speaker 1: always talk about how when guys say good girl in bed,

673
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:26,880
Speaker 1: which men if you're listening and a girl does something

674
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:30,040
Speaker 1: that's I mean, I'm literally getting around right now thinking

675
00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:32,760
Speaker 1: about a guy saying good girl after you do something horrish.

676
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:36,200
Speaker 1: It's the hottest thing ever. I can't I spelled I

677
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,000
Speaker 1: spelled a zevia on it. And so I'm sitting on

678
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:42,239
Speaker 1: a towel already. Um so yeah, right, um, but yeah,

679
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,680
Speaker 1: the whole But Carlisle said, one time she was walking

680
00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:47,480
Speaker 1: down the street and she saw a guy walking his dog,

681
00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:49,560
Speaker 1: and after the dog took a ship, he said, good girl,

682
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:51,880
Speaker 1: and she literally got aroused. And it was so funny

683
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 1: that it's a line in my act. Now, I she

684
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:57,319
Speaker 1: gave that joke to me, because that's exactly it. I mean,

685
00:35:57,640 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 1: that's just taking the stuff I'm already into to the

686
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 1: next level. And I don't want to be treated like

687
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 1: a dog, but I do like being kind of like.

688
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:09,720
Speaker 1: I think the slave kink is very hot, and um,

689
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 1: I'm not opposed to it. I think owning any thing,

690
00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:15,919
Speaker 1: like she owns the fact that she's a puppy. She's

691
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:21,160
Speaker 1: not like yeah, but like, but there's there's power in

692
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,120
Speaker 1: being submissive. I guess I wonder if she's like a

693
00:36:24,160 --> 00:36:26,799
Speaker 1: male dog or a female dog, Like does she lift

694
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:30,400
Speaker 1: her leg or does she do the female squat? Yeah,

695
00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:33,520
Speaker 1: I haven't looked into it. I'm sure that's probably behind

696
00:36:33,520 --> 00:36:35,320
Speaker 1: the paywall. What would you think of a girl you

697
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 1: were dating was into something like this. I mean, I

698
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:41,800
Speaker 1: did hook up with that girl from craigslist that act

699
00:36:42,080 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 1: as a cat. Oh my god, that is so pertinent

700
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:46,960
Speaker 1: to this conversation. Please share that. Well, I met a

701
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: girl of craigslist. This is kind of before Tinder so

702
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 1: I didn't have many. My pool was small, Yeah that

703
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:56,560
Speaker 1: pool you keep talking about, Yes, it was a smaller pool. UM.

704
00:36:56,600 --> 00:37:00,320
Speaker 1: And I met her, and like the casual encounters area,

705
00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,640
Speaker 1: I didn't know what she looked like. I showed up

706
00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:05,000
Speaker 1: and when I opened the door, she was dressed as

707
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 1: a cat. Did she warn you that that was going

708
00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:10,040
Speaker 1: to be the case? I had no idea. Uh did

709
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:12,480
Speaker 1: you see a picture of her before I went in? Blind?

710
00:37:13,160 --> 00:37:15,120
Speaker 1: I was wild. I should have just jerked off. I

711
00:37:15,160 --> 00:37:17,919
Speaker 1: was so horny. It was a low point in my life.

712
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:20,240
Speaker 1: I just lost all my money. I was just very sad.

713
00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:23,200
Speaker 1: So I went to look for love in all the

714
00:37:23,239 --> 00:37:26,120
Speaker 1: wrong places. And I went in and she was crawled.

715
00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:30,440
Speaker 1: She was on her knees already, and she was did

716
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:32,680
Speaker 1: you laugh? I did you go? What is this? I mean, like,

717
00:37:32,760 --> 00:37:37,760
Speaker 1: what is um? I don't know. I just I wanted

718
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 1: to leave, but you know it was I wanted to

719
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 1: be nice too, in a way. I don't know. It's weird. Okay,

720
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 1: So did you have sex with her? She just blew me.

721
00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:50,240
Speaker 1: And when I went to um touch her cat vagina,

722
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:55,080
Speaker 1: she pussy pussy, part pussy pussy. She said, wow, no,

723
00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:57,960
Speaker 1: you know she did it. No, no, but she was.

724
00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:00,319
Speaker 1: She didn't let me finger. You didn't go, why are

725
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:02,320
Speaker 1: you wearing cattiers and acting like a cat? You didn't

726
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:05,399
Speaker 1: like ask that. Care's so much more to unpack here,

727
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:09,000
Speaker 1: but we've got to keep going. I am fascinated by

728
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:11,520
Speaker 1: casual encounters when people just hook up, the hook up culture.

729
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:13,800
Speaker 1: I've never done it where like you meet someone online,

730
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:15,879
Speaker 1: you show up. I'm fascinated by like when you open

731
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:17,839
Speaker 1: the door, do you go, do you just start making out?

732
00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:20,239
Speaker 1: Or do you like pretend to have small talk? Do

733
00:38:20,239 --> 00:38:22,360
Speaker 1: you like do you for a little bit? Do you

734
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:24,799
Speaker 1: scratch me under ears? Do you have to like coax her?

735
00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:26,920
Speaker 1: Do you get some cat nip? Well we played with

736
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:29,880
Speaker 1: a laser pointer for a while, okay, and yeah she

737
00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:32,560
Speaker 1: was having fun with that. You always bring that anyway

738
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:35,480
Speaker 1: to point out their flaw areas before you bang them. Look,

739
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: someone's got to yeah, I mean, I honest, I know.

740
00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:44,359
Speaker 1: The thing is is like I'm not. It sucks when

741
00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:47,719
Speaker 1: someone's like, oh, I overdose from cocaine and then they're like, well, no,

742
00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:51,480
Speaker 1: I don't do coke that much. But like I didn't

743
00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:54,960
Speaker 1: find myself sucking a cat ever in my life, like

744
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 1: it was like, it was the bottom. Yeah, you've done

745
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:01,040
Speaker 1: things for sex that are while. Then I think you

746
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:08,600
Speaker 1: maybe have a compulsive sex urge sometimes to quell your anxieties. Yes, sure,

747
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,960
Speaker 1: and so but I guess when I came very relatable.

748
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:16,560
Speaker 1: Started talking about real estate after, but she was still

749
00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 1: dressed as a cat. Yeah, she's looking for a new

750
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:22,879
Speaker 1: scratching post. But I was in real estate then, yeah,

751
00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:25,239
Speaker 1: and so she was like, so you do real estate

752
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 1: and I was like, you're you're a cat. Like I

753
00:39:28,239 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 1: can't do deals with a cat. Um, I know how

754
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:33,120
Speaker 1: you don't like cats. We have a stray cat on

755
00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 1: the island outside in our because it reminds of real estate,

756
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:41,800
Speaker 1: remind you of Well, this cat comes into our apartment

757
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:44,759
Speaker 1: sometimes and Andrew freaks out and it's so gentle. I

758
00:39:44,760 --> 00:39:46,879
Speaker 1: just don't even understand your fear of it. But now

759
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:49,840
Speaker 1: now it all makes sense. You would think it's feral.

760
00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:52,040
Speaker 1: I mean that the the cat has the eyes of

761
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 1: the devil, right all right next door. I hope everyone's

762
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:57,399
Speaker 1: still doing great. Um, but wait, we have to get

763
00:39:57,440 --> 00:40:00,439
Speaker 1: to why do I care? Oh? I do I care?

764
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:02,799
Speaker 1: Why do you care? Nikki? Wait, let's listen to the

765
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:07,280
Speaker 1: new singer Oh, why do I care? Why do I care? Andrew,

766
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:10,239
Speaker 1: what's the story for why do I care? We're gonna

767
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:12,640
Speaker 1: figure out if you do or not. But Lady Gaga's

768
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:17,600
Speaker 1: boyfriend Michael Polanski apparently sent her all the flowers in

769
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:21,319
Speaker 1: Rome for her thirty fifth birthday. That seems like it

770
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:26,759
Speaker 1: will impact climate change. He uprooted every flower. Yeah, every

771
00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 1: single flower? Are you saying? Is that? So he sent

772
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:32,080
Speaker 1: her a giant basket of flowers? Okay, that was a joke.

773
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:33,920
Speaker 1: I thought he literally tried to get all the flowers,

774
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 1: and I mean the basket. She's hugging a giant basket

775
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:39,640
Speaker 1: of flowers. There's a picture of her. Her butt looks amazing.

776
00:40:39,680 --> 00:40:43,320
Speaker 1: That's how she described it on Instagram. Oh got it? Okay,

777
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,680
Speaker 1: thank you for clarifying that, Andrew, do a better job.

778
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:50,440
Speaker 1: So she's hugging this thing of flowers. She has a

779
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 1: great But I'll tell you that I did research on

780
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 1: this guy, by the way, and it made me think

781
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:57,680
Speaker 1: of you and like, what you're looking for in a

782
00:40:58,400 --> 00:41:02,000
Speaker 1: lover slash boyfriend? Whatever? Tell me what I'm looking for,

783
00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:11,799
Speaker 1: um slash dog owner. Uh, this guy who girl come

784
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:15,440
Speaker 1: suck my penis just yeah, the only trick I know

785
00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:19,440
Speaker 1: is calm. Yeah, come by yourself with five different apparatus

786
00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:25,640
Speaker 1: is good girl. So uh, Michael Polanski works with Sean Parker,

787
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:30,960
Speaker 1: who's from Facebook, the guy from Napster, remember yeah, the

788
00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:35,280
Speaker 1: one where Justin Timberlake plays him in a social network

789
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:37,520
Speaker 1: and he sits across the table and he says, listen.

790
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:40,760
Speaker 1: He says, like, what's what's the quote from that trailer?

791
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:46,799
Speaker 1: Like A million dollars cool? You know, uh, A million dollars,

792
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,480
Speaker 1: that's cool? What's cool? I forget that. You know what's cooler?

793
00:41:49,640 --> 00:41:56,920
Speaker 1: A billion dollars, billion dollars. By the way, shout out

794
00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:59,680
Speaker 1: to anyone who used to listen to my old podcast.

795
00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:02,200
Speaker 1: Is bringing we're bringing back for those of you don't know.

796
00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:07,040
Speaker 1: Is when something when someone does something to be cool

797
00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:12,359
Speaker 1: and they're trying to be cool, you say, very judgmentally, okay,

798
00:42:12,360 --> 00:42:15,000
Speaker 1: so go on. So Michael Blansky works with Shawn Parker.

799
00:42:15,320 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 1: He um he runs the cancer research charity. So he

800
00:42:21,120 --> 00:42:23,680
Speaker 1: made he gets paid millions of dollars to run a charity.

801
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:26,399
Speaker 1: He was graduated from Harvard, so he's very smart. He's

802
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:29,920
Speaker 1: outside the entertainment business. However, he's very looking for what

803
00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:31,880
Speaker 1: are you what do you know what I'm saying? And

804
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:35,640
Speaker 1: then can I can I finish? He's on Instagram and

805
00:42:35,680 --> 00:42:38,200
Speaker 1: he only has two pictures up and they're both of

806
00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:42,920
Speaker 1: his nieces. That's it. He never gets tagged in photos.

807
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:47,279
Speaker 1: He doesn't care about celebrity. Uh yeah, and she fell

808
00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:48,640
Speaker 1: for him, but he has a lot of money, so

809
00:42:48,719 --> 00:42:50,720
Speaker 1: and he cares about her any and he does everything

810
00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 1: for her, like taking all the flowers out, so now

811
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:56,360
Speaker 1: all the bees are dead in Rome. Yeah, um, okay,

812
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,480
Speaker 1: I hear you. I don't know that I want. I

813
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:02,560
Speaker 1: do want all the last parts of the thing. He

814
00:43:02,719 --> 00:43:06,000
Speaker 1: cares about her and all that stuff. But um, and

815
00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:09,320
Speaker 1: the rich part, I don't need that. But you know,

816
00:43:10,960 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 1: but the chart, the rich part, then they're not. He's

817
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:17,520
Speaker 1: on your level. He doesn't care about your money, he

818
00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:19,880
Speaker 1: doesn't care about your success. Yeah, I mean I want

819
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:22,200
Speaker 1: a guy who's not like broke. But like yeah, if

820
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:23,799
Speaker 1: if I if I since the guy was with me

821
00:43:24,080 --> 00:43:25,320
Speaker 1: and I was paying for a lot of stuff, I

822
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 1: would not they would not work. There's just no way

823
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:28,799
Speaker 1: that would even get in. I've never had I've never

824
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:30,919
Speaker 1: been with some one who's mooching off me until now

825
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:36,240
Speaker 1: with you. You're going to be richer than me someday.

826
00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:43,680
Speaker 1: I just know it. Oh god, um yeah, I mean

827
00:43:43,719 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 1: like I remember watching them the documentary what was the

828
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:54,440
Speaker 1: one that everyone watched over the over quarantine about social dilemma,

829
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:57,600
Speaker 1: and there were all these guys that were like, uh,

830
00:43:57,640 --> 00:44:01,680
Speaker 1: you know, whistleblowers for these social media companies about how

831
00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:04,719
Speaker 1: they're you know, harvesting our data and using it against us.

832
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,520
Speaker 1: And I forget which friend I had, she goes, I

833
00:44:07,560 --> 00:44:10,600
Speaker 1: could totally see you. Oh, sere Lena, she goes, Nikki.

834
00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:12,360
Speaker 1: I was watching that because I was like I was

835
00:44:12,400 --> 00:44:14,040
Speaker 1: looking up these guys to see if they were single,

836
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:15,879
Speaker 1: because some of them were like so hot and they're

837
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:20,200
Speaker 1: like just so brave but also like so rich and

838
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:25,120
Speaker 1: um yeah, but well not no, because a lot of

839
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:29,040
Speaker 1: these guys through their high paying jobs under the bus

840
00:44:29,040 --> 00:44:31,359
Speaker 1: and there's so many guys that are so rich that

841
00:44:31,600 --> 00:44:35,000
Speaker 1: never never call out the bad behaviors that they're witnessing

842
00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:38,600
Speaker 1: every day to get rich because greed is so insatiable

843
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:43,480
Speaker 1: and it's never enough billionaires, I'm serious, money is an addiction.

844
00:44:43,560 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 1: And these guys that put it all on the line

845
00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 1: to be a whistle blower was so hot, So my

846
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 1: friend Selina goes, oh my god, I could totally see

847
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:51,799
Speaker 1: you with a tech tech whistleblower and I love that.

848
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 1: That was like a new category of then. So if

849
00:44:54,440 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 1: any of you guys are out there, and by whistle blowers,

850
00:44:57,000 --> 00:45:05,960
Speaker 1: I mean lifeguards are referees. If you if you referee

851
00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:09,520
Speaker 1: that was witnessing behavior in corruption and you called it out,

852
00:45:10,040 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 1: you'd be a whistle blowing whistleblower. That's deep deep man.

853
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:19,160
Speaker 1: All right, let's just I mean the Lady Gaga thing.

854
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:22,520
Speaker 1: I guess it did matter to me because you're saying

855
00:45:22,600 --> 00:45:26,400
Speaker 1: that she's finally like she met a guy that has

856
00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:28,400
Speaker 1: nothing to do with the business and nothing to do

857
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:32,960
Speaker 1: with the business helped cancer people. James, that's what you're saying.

858
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:36,080
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't compete like that. I don't think

859
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:39,360
Speaker 1: Matt James, who still has not looked at or responded

860
00:45:39,360 --> 00:45:43,759
Speaker 1: to my d M, definitely has seen that he received one.

861
00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:47,000
Speaker 1: So he's not interested. And um, and that's okay with me.

862
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:51,560
Speaker 1: Can you blame him? No? I cannot. I'm wearing a

863
00:45:51,600 --> 00:45:53,440
Speaker 1: shirt let's say, bras suck, and I'm wearing a bra

864
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:56,000
Speaker 1: with it that I know, I know I tried to.

865
00:45:56,640 --> 00:45:58,279
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie. I went to see if you

866
00:45:58,320 --> 00:46:00,120
Speaker 1: had a brawn because of the shirt, because of the

867
00:46:01,239 --> 00:46:04,719
Speaker 1: It's a great shirt I got from Balessa. Balssa is

868
00:46:04,760 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 1: a porn uh uh site that I love and it's

869
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:11,839
Speaker 1: like really, it's like the Netflix of porn. And um,

870
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:14,160
Speaker 1: they sent me a bunch of vibrators and also a

871
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,239
Speaker 1: shirt that says bras suck and I love it. Um,

872
00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:20,800
Speaker 1: all right, let's we're going on there. It's time to

873
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:23,920
Speaker 1: introduce a new segment on the Nicki Glazer Podcast. This

874
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:30,680
Speaker 1: one is called Yesterday. I learned that is a common reddit.

875
00:46:31,120 --> 00:46:32,680
Speaker 1: I guess I first saw it on Reddit, but there's

876
00:46:32,840 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 1: a great red subreddit called Yesterday. I learned that just

877
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,960
Speaker 1: presents like information that you can't believe you went your

878
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,160
Speaker 1: whole life without knowing, or something very interesting that was

879
00:46:41,239 --> 00:46:42,680
Speaker 1: like sitting right in front of you the whole time,

880
00:46:42,719 --> 00:46:47,160
Speaker 1: and um, it's just worth noting. Um. So let me

881
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:51,320
Speaker 1: say that this wasn't yesterday exactly, but on I believe

882
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 1: Friday night, I watched the first to thirty minutes of

883
00:46:57,280 --> 00:47:03,640
Speaker 1: the new Netflix documentary c Spiracy. Um number one. Everyone's saying,

884
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:06,520
Speaker 1: why wasn't it called Conspiracy with s e A at

885
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:11,719
Speaker 1: the end. And it's because my friend told me that, Um,

886
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:14,560
Speaker 1: the either producers or the creator said that if I

887
00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:18,160
Speaker 1: name it conspiracy with S E A. When I say conspiracy,

888
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:21,160
Speaker 1: I always have to say conspiracy S e A because

889
00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:23,279
Speaker 1: when you say it, it doesn't. So everyone's going like,

890
00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:25,920
Speaker 1: why would they name it? C spiracy? Which is terrible

891
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:31,120
Speaker 1: is a bad name, So it's C spiracy. I watched it, Um,

892
00:47:31,160 --> 00:47:32,840
Speaker 1: I didn't want to, but it's one of those documentaries.

893
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:36,200
Speaker 1: It's like someone goes, I said something about on Instagram

894
00:47:36,320 --> 00:47:37,759
Speaker 1: or whatever, and they go, why are you watching that

895
00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:41,240
Speaker 1: if you already or vegan? Like it's just just to reaffirm,

896
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:44,080
Speaker 1: And I'm like, because it's teaching me new information to

897
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:48,400
Speaker 1: further enforce my Like, once you're Christian, do you stop

898
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:51,320
Speaker 1: going to church because you get it? Like you gotta

899
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:55,279
Speaker 1: learn And that's a bad example obviously, but or maybe not,

900
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:58,120
Speaker 1: but like you just you want more knowledge about the

901
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:01,719
Speaker 1: things you already believe in. So I I learned a

902
00:48:01,800 --> 00:48:03,880
Speaker 1: lot and I had to turn it off. I mean, noh,

903
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 1: have you seen it. I don't even know what it's about.

904
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:09,000
Speaker 1: Can I just tell you what I found out? Because

905
00:48:09,080 --> 00:48:10,719
Speaker 1: because a lot of people won't be able to watch

906
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:14,719
Speaker 1: this because it really is so upsetting. Um, this guy

907
00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 1: goes becomes obsessed with like the fact that there's so

908
00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:19,640
Speaker 1: much plastic in the sea. First of all, there's more

909
00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:22,399
Speaker 1: microplastics in the sea than there are stars in the

910
00:48:22,440 --> 00:48:25,799
Speaker 1: Milky Way at this point. And microplastics are what the

911
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:36,719
Speaker 1: microscopic uh plastic pieces that Yes, that was solid work.

912
00:48:37,840 --> 00:48:43,480
Speaker 1: Uh So I learned that, you know, all these animals

913
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:45,600
Speaker 1: are dying with just tons of plastic in them. It's

914
00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:49,319
Speaker 1: just disgusting and so upsetting. And I've contributed to it

915
00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:52,560
Speaker 1: myself by consuming plastic. It's just not good. So it

916
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:55,000
Speaker 1: goes into this So let me just get through. The

917
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:57,240
Speaker 1: people who have seen C. Spar C. You can fast

918
00:48:57,239 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 1: forward this part because you get it. And I've only

919
00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:01,120
Speaker 1: seen the first half hour. So what I found out

920
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,359
Speaker 1: is this guy goes to investigate why whaling has now

921
00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:10,360
Speaker 1: become like whaling became globally illegal and banned in everyone

922
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:13,360
Speaker 1: was about saving the whales. Then um people just started,

923
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:20,480
Speaker 1: namely the Japanese started, um just secretly doing it and

924
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:30,359
Speaker 1: see secretly Yeah, no, actually that one secretly see because

925
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:34,920
Speaker 1: no wonder why no one, um they started doing it

926
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:38,279
Speaker 1: and it's just more interesting than you think. So this

927
00:49:38,320 --> 00:49:42,120
Speaker 1: guy goes to this small town in Japan where it's

928
00:49:42,120 --> 00:49:45,160
Speaker 1: happening where every year, where every I don't know how often,

929
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:51,760
Speaker 1: but they corral hundreds of dolphins into this cove type

930
00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:54,840
Speaker 1: area and they murder all these dolphins. And it was

931
00:49:54,960 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 1: just like, why are they doing this? Like there's no

932
00:49:57,200 --> 00:50:01,000
Speaker 1: dolphin meat industry, there's no um, there's no reason to

933
00:50:01,040 --> 00:50:03,399
Speaker 1: kill these dolphins. So here's what happens. First of all,

934
00:50:03,719 --> 00:50:07,200
Speaker 1: they kidnap baby dolphins. They're kidnapping baby dolphins because they

935
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:09,000
Speaker 1: go for a hundred thousand dollars in the black market

936
00:50:09,040 --> 00:50:13,480
Speaker 1: to sell to disgusting aquariums in the US and worldwide,

937
00:50:13,920 --> 00:50:17,320
Speaker 1: never ever visit places that have dolphin or whale shows.

938
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 1: I know that it's something that our culture has embraced.

939
00:50:19,680 --> 00:50:21,960
Speaker 1: Even I wanted to be a c World trainer when

940
00:50:22,000 --> 00:50:25,600
Speaker 1: I was a kid. It is not and I know

941
00:50:25,640 --> 00:50:29,759
Speaker 1: these people care for animals, but it's contributing to you know,

942
00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:32,720
Speaker 1: it's like saying I eat like free range hens. Okay,

943
00:50:32,719 --> 00:50:35,440
Speaker 1: I know you do, but like you are projecting something

944
00:50:35,760 --> 00:50:38,680
Speaker 1: that other people who aren't going to go as far

945
00:50:38,719 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 1: as getting free range hens are still getna just get

946
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,040
Speaker 1: regular eggs or whatever. So just don't support these places,

947
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:47,840
Speaker 1: you guys. They they so they steal these baby dolphins

948
00:50:48,120 --> 00:50:50,280
Speaker 1: when they growl, and then they murder all the dolphins

949
00:50:50,280 --> 00:50:52,480
Speaker 1: that they don't want to steal. And they go, why

950
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:54,480
Speaker 1: are they murdering the dolphins? What is the point of

951
00:50:54,560 --> 00:50:57,920
Speaker 1: murdering these dolphins? And it's because of blue fin tuna,

952
00:50:58,280 --> 00:51:03,080
Speaker 1: the most pricey fit on the market, which they also fish.

953
00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:06,719
Speaker 1: These Japanese fishermen are also over fishing, and so they

954
00:51:06,760 --> 00:51:09,360
Speaker 1: murder the dolphins so that they can then over fish

955
00:51:09,440 --> 00:51:15,439
Speaker 1: and blame the The blame the dolphins for eating their

956
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:18,719
Speaker 1: fish that they're actually fishing, so they murder the they

957
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:23,759
Speaker 1: over fish, and the amount of fish that they take

958
00:51:23,760 --> 00:51:26,920
Speaker 1: out of the ocean, they blame half of that or

959
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:30,319
Speaker 1: however much on the dolphins that they're murdering. So they

960
00:51:30,360 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 1: see the dolphins are competition for in their escapegoat for

961
00:51:35,160 --> 00:51:39,000
Speaker 1: them to over fish this already endangered species. So please,

962
00:51:39,120 --> 00:51:42,840
Speaker 1: for the love of God, stop eating blue fin tuna

963
00:51:42,960 --> 00:51:46,120
Speaker 1: or any tuna. Please. I beg of you. I beg

964
00:51:46,200 --> 00:51:49,440
Speaker 1: of you. Stop eating this tuna at sushi restaurants that

965
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: is the most expensive thing on the plate on the

966
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,480
Speaker 1: menu that you're just ordering. So the girl you're with

967
00:51:53,560 --> 00:51:55,760
Speaker 1: can fuck you later because she thinks you're so impressive

968
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:58,920
Speaker 1: because you're ordering a twenty nine dollar roll. Okay, please

969
00:51:59,320 --> 00:52:06,640
Speaker 1: don't order it. Um, No one's hurting anyone with that.

970
00:52:06,719 --> 00:52:09,520
Speaker 1: But I mean, this is this is such and I

971
00:52:09,560 --> 00:52:12,720
Speaker 1: didn't didn't get any further because it just kept opening

972
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:16,280
Speaker 1: up new things that were just so awful. They're seeing

973
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:22,239
Speaker 1: these gentle creatures who are capable of so much. It's

974
00:52:22,280 --> 00:52:26,640
Speaker 1: just it's it's so hard to see them stabbed and murdered. Um.

975
00:52:27,680 --> 00:52:30,239
Speaker 1: And and these and these these boats come in and

976
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:33,160
Speaker 1: they make a bunch of noise so that the dolphins

977
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: all have to like corral. It's just disgusting practices which

978
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:41,880
Speaker 1: most of the animal you know, husbandry industry is sorry

979
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:43,879
Speaker 1: to farmers who do it right. I know you're out there,

980
00:52:43,920 --> 00:52:47,840
Speaker 1: but I you know, most of it is not good.

981
00:52:48,080 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 1: And um and yeah, it's just like very very upsetting.

982
00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 1: And that's what I learned. And I also learned last

983
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:56,080
Speaker 1: week when we went to Stingray City, which is a

984
00:52:56,080 --> 00:53:02,160
Speaker 1: popular Caymanian destination towards trapped Stingray City, all the tours

985
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:04,560
Speaker 1: dropped off. So these sting rays were getting fed so

986
00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 1: much and relying on these people for food. Then the

987
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:10,560
Speaker 1: sting rays started starving because in back in last March.

988
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:12,360
Speaker 1: Now they go out there just to feed them. We

989
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:14,440
Speaker 1: got to go out there because we're here on the island,

990
00:53:14,520 --> 00:53:16,120
Speaker 1: and we saw the sting rays. It was so much fun.

991
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:19,480
Speaker 1: Talk about it later, but I learned that scallops are

992
00:53:19,560 --> 00:53:23,319
Speaker 1: often stingray wings that are whole punched, just sting rays

993
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:25,560
Speaker 1: or whole punched. So when you eat scallops, a lot

994
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:28,600
Speaker 1: of times you're not even eating scallops. And uh, just

995
00:53:29,760 --> 00:53:34,560
Speaker 1: the food industry is a goddamn lie. And I I

996
00:53:34,719 --> 00:53:36,759
Speaker 1: consume things that are not good for this planet. I

997
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:41,560
Speaker 1: am not uh a saint here, but I really recommend

998
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:45,000
Speaker 1: watching uh five minutes of c Spiracy to just, you know,

999
00:53:45,160 --> 00:53:48,239
Speaker 1: start thinking about it. Oh, that was a lot. I

1000
00:53:48,360 --> 00:53:50,440
Speaker 1: just want people to know. No, I know, I just

1001
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:53,480
Speaker 1: I didn't. Yeah, I I mean, yeah, I love dolphins

1002
00:53:54,160 --> 00:53:57,239
Speaker 1: so much, and they fuck for pleasure. I think they

1003
00:53:57,280 --> 00:54:00,400
Speaker 1: also rape. That's the thing about them. Yeah, now that

1004
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:03,920
Speaker 1: you say that, talk all right, maybe don't watch it.

1005
00:54:05,719 --> 00:54:07,360
Speaker 1: For the final thought, Andrew, let's get back to this

1006
00:54:07,440 --> 00:54:12,400
Speaker 1: kiddiecat thing, casual encounters, tender hookups. I know many of

1007
00:54:12,440 --> 00:54:14,319
Speaker 1: our listeners know the answer to this, and this doesn't

1008
00:54:14,320 --> 00:54:16,320
Speaker 1: seem to confound people the way it does me. But

1009
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:18,360
Speaker 1: when you're meeting up with someone just have sex and

1010
00:54:18,440 --> 00:54:20,560
Speaker 1: maybe you both know that, but you haven't talked about it,

1011
00:54:20,640 --> 00:54:22,920
Speaker 1: how does it go where it's just about sacks? Like

1012
00:54:22,960 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 1: a girl comes over? Had many of those, like an

1013
00:54:26,040 --> 00:54:28,440
Speaker 1: Instagram girl who like, you know this is going to

1014
00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:31,799
Speaker 1: be you've had hook ups come over? Like I hooked

1015
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:34,959
Speaker 1: up with a girl in Austin, Texas where she brought

1016
00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:38,840
Speaker 1: over whiskey and a monster because I told her I

1017
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:42,839
Speaker 1: didn't drink. And we sat down. We started, we had

1018
00:54:42,840 --> 00:54:44,960
Speaker 1: a small talk. I sat on the bed, she sat

1019
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:48,800
Speaker 1: on the chair by the desk. We talked about I

1020
00:54:48,880 --> 00:54:51,200
Speaker 1: don't know everything, like oh wow, I came to your

1021
00:54:51,200 --> 00:54:54,480
Speaker 1: show last night. It was so fun. You were great.

1022
00:54:54,760 --> 00:54:57,600
Speaker 1: I really you know? Uh And I'm like, oh what

1023
00:54:57,680 --> 00:54:59,920
Speaker 1: do you do? And and she's like, you say any

1024
00:55:00,120 --> 00:55:01,799
Speaker 1: about me? I mean I was on the show too.

1025
00:55:02,239 --> 00:55:04,600
Speaker 1: I feel like you just skipped over that part. Yeah. No,

1026
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:08,680
Speaker 1: we get to that during the sex and then like

1027
00:55:09,120 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 1: she said something to me where she was like like

1028
00:55:12,320 --> 00:55:14,440
Speaker 1: in this instance, she's like, well, I have I have

1029
00:55:14,600 --> 00:55:19,040
Speaker 1: yoga in a in an hour, so like I don't

1030
00:55:19,080 --> 00:55:20,840
Speaker 1: really want to talk to you, like I want to

1031
00:55:20,960 --> 00:55:23,640
Speaker 1: start having sex. Like she kind of put it what

1032
00:55:23,760 --> 00:55:26,120
Speaker 1: happens and I go, okay, well I guess we should

1033
00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:27,600
Speaker 1: get to it. She's like yeah, and so then she

1034
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:30,280
Speaker 1: starts drinking. She has like a sip of of whiskey,

1035
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:32,560
Speaker 1: and then I have a sip of moan monster and

1036
00:55:32,640 --> 00:55:34,800
Speaker 1: I don't even like monster that much, but I just

1037
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,800
Speaker 1: and then we just start having sex. And then she

1038
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:40,879
Speaker 1: never went can't just start having sex? Is there a kiss? First?

1039
00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:43,160
Speaker 1: Does she come on to you? Do you go over

1040
00:55:43,239 --> 00:55:45,680
Speaker 1: to her? Like what is the I don't want to

1041
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:47,640
Speaker 1: know the first she came and sat by the bed

1042
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:50,799
Speaker 1: and then yeah, you just lean in for a kiss?

1043
00:55:50,920 --> 00:55:52,719
Speaker 1: Or like did you start touching each other first? Like

1044
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 1: what is that? I think there's a little bit of

1045
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:58,640
Speaker 1: touching on the legs. And then she's like she's like,

1046
00:55:58,680 --> 00:56:00,520
Speaker 1: all right, come on, I gotta get to you. Like

1047
00:56:00,760 --> 00:56:03,000
Speaker 1: essentially like she like pushed and I was like okay,

1048
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 1: and uh it was daytime sex, so that was different.

1049
00:56:06,040 --> 00:56:08,000
Speaker 1: But yeah, and then you just get the kissing and

1050
00:56:08,080 --> 00:56:11,360
Speaker 1: you don't even think. And it's like to consenting adults

1051
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:13,960
Speaker 1: just having a good time where it's just like it's

1052
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:16,759
Speaker 1: not even like a big thing. It's not it's just

1053
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:20,279
Speaker 1: like a transactional thing. I always whenever I have a

1054
00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 1: hook up or like or about that moment of like

1055
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:24,960
Speaker 1: when we're going to get to it, it's just that's

1056
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:26,719
Speaker 1: what's so interesting to me, is like who takes the

1057
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:29,680
Speaker 1: first move of like, and I usually am the one

1058
00:56:29,719 --> 00:56:32,360
Speaker 1: to be like, do you want to like kiss me?

1059
00:56:32,520 --> 00:56:34,200
Speaker 1: Like I I just gotta say, I just want to

1060
00:56:34,239 --> 00:56:35,759
Speaker 1: get to it, like I don't. I just want to

1061
00:56:35,880 --> 00:56:39,239
Speaker 1: give either permission or I guess when you're meeting up

1062
00:56:39,400 --> 00:56:42,279
Speaker 1: with someone and it's already kind of understood that you're

1063
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:44,400
Speaker 1: gonna get right to fucking, it takes all that like

1064
00:56:44,640 --> 00:56:47,759
Speaker 1: stupid guess work out of it where its no that

1065
00:56:47,840 --> 00:56:50,600
Speaker 1: guess works so annoying. It's like, let's just like be

1066
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:53,680
Speaker 1: like adults and have sex like dolphins where they're just

1067
00:56:53,760 --> 00:56:57,520
Speaker 1: like and I'm honestly every single time, well ever something

1068
00:56:57,880 --> 00:56:59,440
Speaker 1: I've never been in a scenario where it's like we're

1069
00:56:59,440 --> 00:57:01,560
Speaker 1: meeting up to sex unless it's someone I've already had

1070
00:57:01,560 --> 00:57:04,840
Speaker 1: sex with, so that's you know, not the scenario, but

1071
00:57:05,000 --> 00:57:08,560
Speaker 1: like if someone new and it's like we haven't decided

1072
00:57:08,640 --> 00:57:11,120
Speaker 1: that that's the vibe yet. I always have to like

1073
00:57:11,239 --> 00:57:14,680
Speaker 1: call it out, like very specifically, like either I like

1074
00:57:14,920 --> 00:57:17,960
Speaker 1: you or will you kiss me? Like you know, I

1075
00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:19,560
Speaker 1: used to have the old line of like we'd be

1076
00:57:19,640 --> 00:57:22,000
Speaker 1: hanging out like a guy that just thinks he's being

1077
00:57:22,040 --> 00:57:24,120
Speaker 1: friend zoned or whatever, and I'm like, oh my god,

1078
00:57:24,160 --> 00:57:25,600
Speaker 1: I forgot to tell you something and he's like what,

1079
00:57:25,720 --> 00:57:27,600
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I like you, and then it just

1080
00:57:27,680 --> 00:57:29,920
Speaker 1: like makes it funny and kind of cuts through. I

1081
00:57:30,040 --> 00:57:34,520
Speaker 1: likent like be blunt, like yeah, I I don't like

1082
00:57:34,800 --> 00:57:37,480
Speaker 1: this whole thing of like, oh, she said she liked

1083
00:57:37,520 --> 00:57:41,120
Speaker 1: my shirt. What's so hot is that touch? You know,

1084
00:57:41,240 --> 00:57:43,440
Speaker 1: when you're like you like someone and you don't know

1085
00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:45,760
Speaker 1: if they like you. So I mean, I've talked about

1086
00:57:45,760 --> 00:57:48,240
Speaker 1: this extensively, but the guy is the best way to

1087
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:50,160
Speaker 1: know if a girl would like to be kissed and

1088
00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:52,720
Speaker 1: it is okay to maybe be asked to be kissed

1089
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:56,600
Speaker 1: and likes you romantically is if you gently put your

1090
00:57:56,760 --> 00:57:58,560
Speaker 1: arm next to hers or like a part of your

1091
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:00,480
Speaker 1: body that can be a flush surface, not just one

1092
00:58:00,520 --> 00:58:02,640
Speaker 1: little point, but like at least like a two inch

1093
00:58:02,800 --> 00:58:07,920
Speaker 1: area of like like arm or leg, and you make

1094
00:58:07,960 --> 00:58:09,840
Speaker 1: it so like a piece of paper could maybe even

1095
00:58:09,880 --> 00:58:12,800
Speaker 1: fit between your where your skin is touching, like but

1096
00:58:12,880 --> 00:58:15,360
Speaker 1: it is touching like it but you could easily slide

1097
00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:17,880
Speaker 1: through like barely touching. And if the girl doesn't move it,

1098
00:58:18,440 --> 00:58:20,560
Speaker 1: she likes you. She keeps it there and you're both

1099
00:58:20,640 --> 00:58:23,640
Speaker 1: like very aware it's touching. She leaves it there, that

1100
00:58:23,720 --> 00:58:25,880
Speaker 1: means she likes you. If she moves it, it's the

1101
00:58:25,960 --> 00:58:28,640
Speaker 1: best way to get that confirmation because you lose nothing

1102
00:58:28,720 --> 00:58:31,840
Speaker 1: because it's such an innocuous touch that her rejection won't

1103
00:58:31,880 --> 00:58:33,600
Speaker 1: make you feel like, oh my god, I just came

1104
00:58:33,640 --> 00:58:36,080
Speaker 1: onto her. But it is an answer of like she's

1105
00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:38,000
Speaker 1: not ready yet. And if she keeps it there and

1106
00:58:38,120 --> 00:58:41,240
Speaker 1: doesn't move and makes a point not to move, then

1107
00:58:41,760 --> 00:58:46,560
Speaker 1: it's it's a good sign, you know what. I want

1108
00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:48,880
Speaker 1: to fuck you, dude, because I got yoga in an hour.

1109
00:58:50,520 --> 00:58:53,000
Speaker 1: I think, I mean, that is really hot too, but

1110
00:58:53,280 --> 00:58:56,200
Speaker 1: I think it's just that's not the kind of sex

1111
00:58:56,280 --> 00:59:00,480
Speaker 1: I have, and I like a more, you know, I

1112
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:03,360
Speaker 1: just like I like that at tension And people sent

1113
00:59:03,440 --> 00:59:08,160
Speaker 1: me such great ideas for um sexual. Keep your arm

1114
00:59:08,280 --> 00:59:10,560
Speaker 1: next to my arm where we touch arms until it

1115
00:59:10,640 --> 00:59:13,480
Speaker 1: gets weird. This I feel comfortable with you because we're

1116
00:59:13,480 --> 00:59:15,480
Speaker 1: such good friends. Like you couldn't look at me in

1117
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:19,720
Speaker 1: the eye the other day. Well, I mean what intact

1118
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:22,560
Speaker 1: is different. I don't like eye contact with my friends,

1119
00:59:22,640 --> 00:59:24,640
Speaker 1: but touching my friends like I can touch you like

1120
00:59:25,040 --> 00:59:26,960
Speaker 1: I used to not want you because it wasn't our

1121
00:59:27,080 --> 00:59:30,880
Speaker 1: friendship was solid and it was still like sometimes I'll

1122
00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:32,520
Speaker 1: touch you on the shoulder and you go, don't do that,

1123
00:59:32,680 --> 00:59:35,800
Speaker 1: and I'm like, because friend, I'm not trying. That was

1124
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:38,360
Speaker 1: the old me. Now I'm very comfortable like touching you

1125
00:59:38,480 --> 00:59:41,200
Speaker 1: and like three days ago, I'm not joking you. It's

1126
00:59:41,240 --> 00:59:43,240
Speaker 1: been within the last three days that I like and

1127
00:59:43,360 --> 00:59:47,400
Speaker 1: fully embraced it. That feels sexual. He just touched me

1128
00:59:47,400 --> 00:59:50,400
Speaker 1: on the shoulder. I don't like it, as is me

1129
00:59:50,600 --> 00:59:53,040
Speaker 1: just testing you to be like, come on, just put

1130
00:59:53,160 --> 00:59:56,400
Speaker 1: my dick in your mouth and just friends. No. The

1131
00:59:56,520 --> 01:00:00,120
Speaker 1: last the last time I had a hook up, I

1132
01:00:00,560 --> 01:00:03,640
Speaker 1: like the first time hook up it started with me going,

1133
01:00:05,160 --> 01:00:08,200
Speaker 1: do you want to hold my hand? Like that? Innocent?

1134
01:00:08,720 --> 01:00:11,920
Speaker 1: It's so it was so good and it was just

1135
01:00:12,000 --> 01:00:14,880
Speaker 1: like the like that's just like, ah, that's admitting like

1136
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:17,919
Speaker 1: I want to be close to you, um, without taking

1137
01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:20,520
Speaker 1: it too far. And it's just this, it's like you're

1138
01:00:20,520 --> 01:00:23,440
Speaker 1: trying to relive your past of like, and I didn't

1139
01:00:23,480 --> 01:00:25,480
Speaker 1: have any hookups in middle school of high school, and

1140
01:00:25,600 --> 01:00:28,680
Speaker 1: so from whether or not I'm reliving it, I think

1141
01:00:28,760 --> 01:00:33,600
Speaker 1: that's when love and romance is so thrilling and so intoxicating,

1142
01:00:33,680 --> 01:00:35,720
Speaker 1: and so there's nothing wrong with wanting to feel like

1143
01:00:35,720 --> 01:00:38,960
Speaker 1: a teenager again, No, not at all. I mean bold

1144
01:00:39,040 --> 01:00:42,880
Speaker 1: hands and uh and dry hopping and have sex with

1145
01:00:42,960 --> 01:00:45,560
Speaker 1: one of your and then writing your diary and your

1146
01:00:45,640 --> 01:00:49,200
Speaker 1: mom reads it and ground two. Yeah, well my mom

1147
01:00:49,320 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 1: never read my diary. I would like literally leave my

1148
01:00:51,120 --> 01:00:54,400
Speaker 1: diaries open so my mom could read them and be like, Nick,

1149
01:00:54,440 --> 01:00:56,800
Speaker 1: are you struggling with this thing? But she respected my

1150
01:00:56,840 --> 01:00:58,360
Speaker 1: privacy too much and would never leave it. I'd like

1151
01:00:58,440 --> 01:00:59,880
Speaker 1: leave it open on her bed and she'd be like,

1152
01:01:00,240 --> 01:01:02,800
Speaker 1: I never read your diaries when I was cleaning your room.

1153
01:01:02,840 --> 01:01:05,480
Speaker 1: So I'd be like, that's all I wanted you to do. Mom.

1154
01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:08,200
Speaker 1: All right, guys, we gotta go. Thank you so much

1155
01:01:08,240 --> 01:01:11,360
Speaker 1: for listening today. We'll be back tomorrow. UM, hopefully my

1156
01:01:11,480 --> 01:01:14,640
Speaker 1: voice will be a little bit better. It didn't bother

1157
01:01:14,720 --> 01:01:18,600
Speaker 1: you today, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Number?

1158
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:20,840
Speaker 1: When Phoebe on Friends, her voice got she got a cold,

1159
01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:22,600
Speaker 1: and she was like she liked it her voice better.

1160
01:01:23,160 --> 01:01:26,360
Speaker 1: Oh no, but you sound like Tom Watts waits Tom

1161
01:01:26,520 --> 01:01:31,720
Speaker 1: Watts waiting. That is, you just said it sounded good.

1162
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:36,160
Speaker 1: And then was that a joke? That is the most insulted.

1163
01:01:36,280 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 1: He slap like, he's like, you're a little raspier. All right,

1164
01:01:41,480 --> 01:01:44,080
Speaker 1: we'll see you tomorrow. What was the thing we said before?

1165
01:01:44,280 --> 01:01:48,240
Speaker 1: Swells swells, Baby Evan swells