Speaker 1: Pasha Tosh sh Show. Hey, guys, guess what it's time
Speaker 1: for a Toss Show emergency pod Eddie hit the Sirens
Speaker 1: braw band. Now you probably would why I'm dressed like
Speaker 1: the Capitol One guy. Yeah, I don't know, Jack, I
Speaker 1: just looked like that. He looks like a fucking idiot.
Speaker 1: I hate that guy. Hands. No, what's that big hands?
Speaker 1: I don't give a shit if he's got big hands. Guys,
Speaker 1: this emergency pod is serious. Okay, okay, we're talking NBA.
Speaker 1: So I put on a dumb jacket, so I looked
Speaker 1: like an NBA draft pick. And now some people right
Speaker 1: now we go, I don't care about the NBA. Good
Speaker 1: turn this off. It's not for you. Nobody watches basketball.
Speaker 1: Fuck you, everyone watches basketball. You don't watch basketball. I
Speaker 1: care about basketball. We're gonna talk about basketball. And if
Speaker 1: you haven't been watching this year's playoffs, you've missed out
Speaker 1: all right. Well, by the way, gratulations to Dallas on
Speaker 1: winning the first RIG pick of the draft. Oh my goodness,
Speaker 1: you know who is that? GM is like, Oh, thank god,
Speaker 1: we can draft another white superstar to lead the Mavericks
Speaker 1: for the next twenty years or six years. And then
Speaker 1: fucking trade him to La when the barbecue here in
Speaker 1: Dallas gets them all fat and doe. I can't believe
Speaker 1: they want but I do want to point out as
Speaker 1: a Miami Heat fan that had they not they were
Speaker 1: the ten seed and got their way into the playoffs
Speaker 1: through the stupid playing games to only get blown out
Speaker 1: by seventy each night in Cleveland, they would have had
Speaker 1: that same probability the eleventh seed and that would have
Speaker 1: been their first pick. But I'm sure pat Riley saw
Speaker 1: that and realized that's not what we want to do.
Speaker 1: By the way, I don't know what you watch ed
Speaker 1: the games on your YouTube TV? Right? Yeah? Okay? When
Speaker 1: it asked me do you want to watch it on
Speaker 1: tn T or True TV, I'm like, what, Who in
Speaker 1: the fuck is picking True TV? The only people watching
Speaker 1: the playoffs on True TV or the impractical Jokers? True
Speaker 1: TV is the first option. I scroll past it every
Speaker 1: single time. I don't know they're different announcers. Do they
Speaker 1: slime you? Another thing that's really annoying me. Now, I'm
Speaker 1: glad that we have replay. Of course it should go faster,
Speaker 1: but knock it off with the players after every single
Speaker 1: foul coach, child, I didn't touch them. Shut the fuck up.
Speaker 1: You're a role player. It's the beginning of the first quarter.
Speaker 1: Nobody's challenging this play. Get back on defense. No one
Speaker 1: cares if you foul out. I didn't touch the ball
Speaker 1: last Okay, calm down, we'll review it if the play
Speaker 1: is important. If I was a coach and one of
Speaker 1: my players did this, I would be like, Okay, we
Speaker 1: have to bench you because you're dumb. You think we
Speaker 1: don't understand. We have one job over here. It's to
Speaker 1: call timeouts and bucking review a few plays. All right,
Speaker 1: let's talk about Cleveland. Now, leave it to Cleveland, the
Speaker 1: most Cleveland thing in the world. Win games when they
Speaker 1: don't matter, and then shit the bed when it does.
Speaker 1: You know, you did the best regular season in franchise history.
Speaker 1: Go ahead and shove that up your depressing ass. By
Speaker 1: the way, when people talk about like Detroit being depressed,
Speaker 1: I'm like, are you kidding me? And I know it's
Speaker 1: oh it's almost hack talking about how awful Cleveland is.
Speaker 1: But you tell me, oh, you can live in Gaza
Speaker 1: or Cleveland. I'm picking Gaza every time. Speaking of depressing,
Speaker 1: poor Boston, hate him or really hate him. You know,
Speaker 1: watching Tatum go down, I was just hoping. I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: please be another Paul Pierce shit in his pants scenario.
Speaker 1: There's carting you off because there's just shit everywhere. But no, no,
Speaker 1: he's done. I have a theory that he wanted to
Speaker 1: leave and not be seen in that series because he
Speaker 1: was the only good looking fella. If you look at
Speaker 1: both those teams, man, are they ugly top the bottom.
Speaker 1: I'm not talking about their play. Their play is great,
Speaker 1: but physically, man, they are all ugly. Karl Anthony Towns
Speaker 1: his posture just walking around. His neck comes out the
Speaker 1: front of his torso Jalen Brown's his eyes are too
Speaker 1: close together. That seems weird. Thibodeau his You know, you
Speaker 1: don't go after another man's hair when you yourself are balding. Well,
Speaker 1: you know I did something about mine early on when
Speaker 1: it started a thin. I can't imagine if I had
Speaker 1: four hairs left, Like I'm gonna hang on to him
Speaker 1: and slick them back. That's so weird, especially when you're
Speaker 1: a basketball coach where every angle that you're shot at
Speaker 1: is from above, Like, can't he doesn't he watch some
Speaker 1: game tape and see himself occasionally go oh, that looks horrible.
Speaker 1: I should buzz my head. What about Jalen Brunson. I mean,
Speaker 1: mister Clutch physically looks like he should work security at
Speaker 1: the farmer's market. I've never once seen him crack a smile,
Speaker 1: just constant. I'm like, bro, you're you're making millions and
Speaker 1: millions of dollars, You're in New York City and you're
Speaker 1: the best player. Smile. Nope, guy's got no soul whatsoever.
Speaker 1: Who are the other ugly people in that series physically?
Speaker 1: I'm just talking about physical appearances. I'm just cutting men apart.
Speaker 1: Derek White, men being cruel to men. Derek White, that's
Speaker 1: an odd look. Oh uh, I don't know what's wrong
Speaker 1: with him. That lineage line looks like it's a little overlapping.
Speaker 1: Peyton Pritchard, Oh man, how neat to be sitting in
Speaker 1: section three point fifty and get your name called? You're
Speaker 1: playing what? I'll just live here and all right here
Speaker 1: I go. I mean, if you were to tell me
Speaker 1: that he is a world class athlete, I would think, no,
Speaker 1: not this guy. By the way, porzingis rarely can you
Speaker 1: be you know a lot? Via seven foot whatever and
Speaker 1: and be not the ugly duckling somehow he like looks like,
Speaker 1: oh he looks. Okay. That just shows you what kind
Speaker 1: of monsters that you're surrounded by. And they show the
Speaker 1: celebrities and they're ugly, even in New York supposed to
Speaker 1: be supposed to be a glamorous city. I'm just looking
Speaker 1: at all these old Knicks players. I'm looking at uh,
Speaker 1: Spike Lee, Tracy Morgan's on on the court side seat,
Speaker 1: just vomiting. What is happening. I mean, come on, let's
Speaker 1: get some sex appeal in there. Guys, that's what you
Speaker 1: do with your draft pick. You've you've clearly got a
Speaker 1: team that can play. Let's get some hunks on the court.
Speaker 1: Oh ah, I mean, I know I'm a homer, but
Speaker 1: I long for a Dan Marley. Remember how good looking
Speaker 1: he was. Oh my goodness, this is a nice tan
Speaker 1: on the court looking cool. Yeah. Well, anyway, sorry to Boston, Uh,
Speaker 1: but you know you won it all last year. Nobody
Speaker 1: feels good. I tell you, this generation of people in Boston,
Speaker 1: you know who are are what you might call it, guy,
Speaker 1: our buddy, our teamster president said it best. Is this
Speaker 1: generation of kids in Boston that grew up with nothing
Speaker 1: but winners. They have no idea how bad their parents
Speaker 1: had it. Minnesota Golden State. This is tough to watch.
Speaker 1: What's the over under on if Draymond takes someone's life.
Speaker 1: This is why we got Jimmy Butler for moments like
Speaker 1: they said this. They said this constantly when they were
Speaker 1: winning meaningless games at the end of the season. I
Speaker 1: mean they weren't meaningless to them, but they weren't tough games.
Speaker 1: This is why we got Jimmy Butler. And I'm like, guys,
Speaker 1: wait till he starts missing at the rim. It's so annoying.
Speaker 1: It's constant. I've watched it every play. Oh, he'll just
Speaker 1: miss buckets so close. No, not playoff, Jimmy, playoff Jimmy.
Speaker 1: Is he helping? You know? They're not saying it now.
Speaker 1: They're not saying this is why we brought him here.
Speaker 1: Now that the it's like, oh, well, you kind of
Speaker 1: need Steph. I meant injuries happen, of course, but you
Speaker 1: beat the Warriors without Steph, We're gonna put an asterisk
Speaker 1: next to it. That's like saying, you know, in the nineties,
Speaker 1: oh we beat the bulls, you beat the Bulls with
Speaker 1: Jordan No, no, you know that that year and a
Speaker 1: half period where he was playing t ball because his
Speaker 1: dad's gambling problem. Oh well, it's not really beating the
Speaker 1: Bulls then, is it. My point is, you're not beating
Speaker 1: the Warriors if if Steph played every game and finally,
Speaker 1: the OKAC Denver, Oh, the Nuggets. My favorite thing to
Speaker 1: watch at an OKAC game when they're playing at home
Speaker 1: is if the team starts out cold and watching the
Speaker 1: fans get winded having to stand until their team makes
Speaker 1: the first bucket of the night and they can all
Speaker 1: sit down. It's actually nice that that team gives out
Speaker 1: T shirts to everyone, because Lord knows their fashion sense
Speaker 1: in Oklahoma, Oklahoma might be the only place where people
Speaker 1: are buying tickets to the game so that they get
Speaker 1: the T shirt. I'm actually positive a lot of the
Speaker 1: people show up without a shirt on. They're like, oh, well,
Speaker 1: we get a shirt when we get there. You know
Speaker 1: why they never do those give outs in La at
Speaker 1: a Lakers game because Laker fans aren't gonna put on
Speaker 1: a gross T shirt. No one's gonna, oh you want
Speaker 1: me to put this thick BFT over my outfit? No,
Speaker 1: it's not gonna happen. That's that's cute. I'll give it
Speaker 1: to my gardener. I'll let them wash the car with it.
Speaker 1: God help us if Denver makes it to the finals again.
Speaker 1: I know Djokich is an amazing talent. Great, he's unwatchable.
Speaker 1: Djokich might be the least entertaining athlete to watch in
Speaker 1: the history of athletes. It's like if you planted a
Speaker 1: tree in the middle of the court and waited for
Speaker 1: it to grow, and they're like, well, why don't we
Speaker 1: give that tree fifty one million dollars a year. I
Speaker 1: don't even know if he understands that he's getting paid
Speaker 1: that much money, like you probably don't have to pay him.
Speaker 1: Maybe thinks these are pickup games and just tons of
Speaker 1: people come to watch because it's the us of a Eddie.
Speaker 1: Who you think is gonna win Larry O'Brien Trophy? And
Speaker 1: I'll give you a million dollars if you can tell
Speaker 1: me who the fuck Larry O'Brien is. No, I don't
Speaker 1: even know. I don't get the connection. Oh geez, all right,
Speaker 1: I have no idea I have I've never I've never
Speaker 1: wanted to know. Well, lucky for US. We only have
Speaker 1: four more weeks of NBA playoffs. At least it's entertaining.
Speaker 1: We got four more weeks and then just MLB and
Speaker 1: w n B A and I'm sure I think the
Speaker 1: Pickleball Tour picks back up. All right, give me the siren?
Speaker 1: Where where shot clock? Okay,