1 00:00:01,160 --> 00:00:03,920 Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And 2 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:09,120 Speaker 1: if you need advice on relationships, date works, dating work, sex, parenting, 3 00:00:09,119 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 1: and more. Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM 4 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter because we could 5 00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:18,959 Speaker 1: be reading your letter live on the air, just like 6 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,759 Speaker 1: we're gonna read this one right here, right now. Muggle up, 7 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:26,319 Speaker 1: hold on tight, we got it for you. Draw Upberry letter. 8 00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:31,120 Speaker 1: Thank you, ne subject you ain't my stepmama. Dear Stephen Shirley. 9 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:34,159 Speaker 1: I've been dating a man for eight years and he 10 00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:38,120 Speaker 1: proposed last month. Shortly after we met, he found out 11 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:40,080 Speaker 1: about a two year old daughter by a woman he 12 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 1: had a one night stand with. The child's mother was 13 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:45,159 Speaker 1: messing with two guys, so of course he took a 14 00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:48,760 Speaker 1: paternity test. I drove him back and forth to visit 15 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:52,280 Speaker 1: his child, which was over three hours away. I was 16 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:54,640 Speaker 1: friendly with the child's mother and his daughter and I 17 00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:57,760 Speaker 1: became besties. When she came to visit. She stayed at 18 00:00:57,760 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 1: my house and we did our nails and other girly 19 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:03,760 Speaker 1: things the whole weekend. She was a sweetheart. As she 20 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:07,360 Speaker 1: got older, her dad visited her more often to attend 21 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,880 Speaker 1: her soccer games. We were still very close and she 22 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,080 Speaker 1: called me all the time to check in and chat 23 00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:16,160 Speaker 1: with me. Last month, she was at her dad's house 24 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:19,320 Speaker 1: when he proposed to me. After he asked me to 25 00:01:19,319 --> 00:01:23,160 Speaker 1: marry him. She yelled no and ran from the room. 26 00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 1: I want to talk to her, and she said that 27 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 1: she loves me as a friend, but she does not 28 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:32,080 Speaker 1: want me to marry her dad. She's eleven years old now, 29 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,399 Speaker 1: so I figured she's old enough to know that marriage 30 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:37,560 Speaker 1: was always in the plan for her dad and I. 31 00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:41,360 Speaker 1: She said, you ain't my stepmama, and you won't ever 32 00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:45,440 Speaker 1: be my stepmama. I was shocked by her reaction and 33 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:50,040 Speaker 1: what came next. She said that her dad spends the 34 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,480 Speaker 1: night at her house when he comes to visit her, 35 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:55,600 Speaker 1: and he stays in her mom's room. I want to 36 00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 1: ask my man, and he put his head in his 37 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:02,880 Speaker 1: hands and started. I FaceTime the mom and she told 38 00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:06,559 Speaker 1: me that my man's been sending mixed signals. She would 39 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:10,080 Speaker 1: not confirm or deny that they had sex. He swears 40 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:12,960 Speaker 1: that he sleeps on the couch, and I know his 41 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,840 Speaker 1: daughter knows a lot more, but he told me to 42 00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:18,280 Speaker 1: leave her out of it. She started all of this. 43 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,720 Speaker 1: So why can't I ask her? You can't ask her 44 00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 1: crazy because she's a child. Okay, you're an adult. Talk 45 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:30,080 Speaker 1: to the adults in this situation. Sorry, this eleven year 46 00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:33,040 Speaker 1: old told you all that because of course she doesn't 47 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:37,440 Speaker 1: want you to marry her dad. You have enough information, 48 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:42,560 Speaker 1: You have a lot of information. Your fiance sleeps at 49 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:46,760 Speaker 1: his mom's house, at her mom's house, in her mom's room, 50 00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:51,560 Speaker 1: according to her, when he's there, and the one night 51 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:54,640 Speaker 1: stand mother of the child, the baby mama may not 52 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: tell you. She may not confirm or deny that they're 53 00:02:57,400 --> 00:03:00,680 Speaker 1: having sex. She's tricky like that, but they probably are. 54 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,880 Speaker 1: If he's sleeping in the room, he says he's sleeping 55 00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:04,880 Speaker 1: in the couch, but he's still sleeping in her house. 56 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:07,200 Speaker 1: Why couldn't he get a hotel room, you know, if 57 00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:10,560 Speaker 1: there's nothing going on otherwise, I don't understand why he's 58 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:14,840 Speaker 1: sleeping in a room. So again, talk to the grown folks. 59 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:17,840 Speaker 1: Leave this baby out of it. Yeah, you know, she 60 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:21,400 Speaker 1: said that, and she's upset and everything, and that's where 61 00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:23,680 Speaker 1: you should leave it. Don't bother her with this. She's 62 00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:26,320 Speaker 1: only eleven years old, she's not grown. You don't need 63 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:29,240 Speaker 1: to be talking to her about this. Your man said, 64 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:31,560 Speaker 1: leave her out of it. That's his daughter. I think 65 00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:34,200 Speaker 1: you should take his advice and leave her out of it. 66 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:37,400 Speaker 1: Find out what you know from him and the baby mama, Steve, 67 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 1: you ain't my step always some little smart moutain kid 68 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 1: somewhere calling shots two adults that's trying to make their 69 00:03:51,760 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: life better. Another letter like this, Well, your man after 70 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: he proposed, found out he had a baby from a 71 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,760 Speaker 1: woman he had a one night stand with, took a 72 00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:13,720 Speaker 1: paternity test, is his You used to drive him down there, 73 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:19,279 Speaker 1: three hours away to see the baby. Wonderful child, and 74 00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:23,520 Speaker 1: you was friendly with the child's mother. I don't know why, 75 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:25,520 Speaker 1: but I guess since you're going down that might as 76 00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:29,040 Speaker 1: well trying to be friendly. You know these things almost 77 00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:33,200 Speaker 1: never work out, but you know, congratulations for trying. And 78 00:04:33,839 --> 00:04:40,800 Speaker 1: the daughter and you became besties. I don't really become 79 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:46,760 Speaker 1: friends with kids because they fickle. And the main reason 80 00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:49,640 Speaker 1: is we ain't got nothing incoming. I don't give it. Damn. 81 00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:53,000 Speaker 1: If you do need your nails done, that don't make 82 00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:57,279 Speaker 1: us friends. So you went on, you got your nails 83 00:04:57,279 --> 00:05:02,719 Speaker 1: and girly things. She was a sweetheart and as she 84 00:05:02,839 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 1: got older, the dad visited her more often to go 85 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:10,240 Speaker 1: to soccer games and stuff. Y'all still close, called ya 86 00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:16,280 Speaker 1: all the time to talk. Now here's where it got tricky. 87 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:20,320 Speaker 1: Last month, she was at her dad's house. Now to 88 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:22,720 Speaker 1: guide at them proposed to you. You all obviously have 89 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:27,480 Speaker 1: separate places. So she was at her dad's house when 90 00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:30,960 Speaker 1: he proposed me. Then he asked you to marry him. 91 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:37,719 Speaker 1: She yelled no and ran from the room. Then you 92 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:39,599 Speaker 1: want to talk to you, and she said, she loves 93 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:43,200 Speaker 1: me as a friend, but she does not want me 94 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:47,760 Speaker 1: to marry her dad. Do you know why she don't 95 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:53,560 Speaker 1: want you to marry her dad because she has aspirations 96 00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:59,320 Speaker 1: of your dad, her dad marrying her mother, and she'll 97 00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:03,960 Speaker 1: have her favorite people, which are her parents in one house. 98 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:10,560 Speaker 1: Kids have delusional thoughts like this all the time. So 99 00:06:11,560 --> 00:06:14,520 Speaker 1: you figured she eleven years old, she old enough to 100 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:18,239 Speaker 1: know that marriage is always in the plan for her daddy. 101 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:22,160 Speaker 1: Nine well, but you didn't know what was in her plans. 102 00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:27,520 Speaker 1: Her plans, and she figured, you know, her daddy would 103 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:29,960 Speaker 1: give it her mama. Now she dropped a bomb on 104 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,880 Speaker 1: you and told you that her daddy stayed in the 105 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,920 Speaker 1: room with her mama when we come back, I'm gonna 106 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,479 Speaker 1: tell you why this letter is. Can all go to 107 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 1: hell from this point on? All right, we'll have her 108 00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:45,640 Speaker 1: two of Steve's response coming up at twenty three minutes 109 00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:49,520 Speaker 1: after be our Today's Strawberry Letters, subject you ain't my Stepmama. 110 00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:52,480 Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening 111 00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:56,440 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's 112 00:06:56,440 --> 00:07:02,120 Speaker 1: recap today's Strawberry Letters. Subject you ain't stop mama. This 113 00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:06,000 Speaker 1: man that has proposed to the letter writer has a 114 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,360 Speaker 1: daughter from a one night stand. Turns out his hiss. 115 00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:13,240 Speaker 1: They had started traveling to visit his child. The woman 116 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:15,800 Speaker 1: that wrote this letter would take him three hours away. 117 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:18,120 Speaker 1: Has had a friendly relationship with the mother, and her 118 00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:20,840 Speaker 1: and the daughter became besties, and they get their nails done. 119 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:24,360 Speaker 1: They had wonderful weekends. The girl has been a sweetheart. Well, 120 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:27,680 Speaker 1: time goes on. He's been spending more time with the 121 00:07:27,840 --> 00:07:30,880 Speaker 1: daughter because going to a soccer games and stuff, and 122 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 1: so he proposed to the letter writer at his house. 123 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:39,200 Speaker 1: The letter writer and the man who are engaged living 124 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:42,560 Speaker 1: separate home. She proposed in front of the girl, will 125 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:46,360 Speaker 1: you marry me? The girl said no, and ran out 126 00:07:46,440 --> 00:07:50,080 Speaker 1: the room and said, she does not want me to 127 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:53,880 Speaker 1: marry her dad. So she's and then I'm telling you 128 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,360 Speaker 1: the reason she don't want you to marry a daddy's 129 00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:59,680 Speaker 1: She has plans for her dad and her mama to 130 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 1: be man, that's all it is. So now you go 131 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:09,680 Speaker 1: in there and try to reason with her, telling her 132 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:12,160 Speaker 1: the marriage has always been in the plan for her dad. 133 00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:16,080 Speaker 1: Now she said, you ain't my stepmama, and you won't 134 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: ever be my stepmoma. Well she's being certain about that, 135 00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:22,960 Speaker 1: because how you gonna be my stepmama if my daddy 136 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 1: and my mama get married. See, she loving so she 137 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:28,280 Speaker 1: don't know how to tell you the whole story. She 138 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:31,960 Speaker 1: just told you you ain't gonna ever be And then 139 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:34,680 Speaker 1: you got shocked by her reaction. Where it came down. 140 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:37,360 Speaker 1: She said, now let me tell you why I'm saying 141 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,839 Speaker 1: all this here. My dad expends the night at our 142 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:43,480 Speaker 1: house when he comes to visit, and he's staying my 143 00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:47,679 Speaker 1: mom's room. Now here was a letter take a dump turn. 144 00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 1: I went and asked my man, and he put his 145 00:08:52,679 --> 00:09:01,840 Speaker 1: head in his hands and started crying, I why did 146 00:09:01,920 --> 00:09:05,880 Speaker 1: you do that? You're disappointed? Dog? You couldn't have held 147 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,720 Speaker 1: it together until later on that night in the bathroom 148 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,480 Speaker 1: by yourself. You could have went out in the Carnie 149 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:14,600 Speaker 1: garage and head that moment. I understand we had all 150 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:17,520 Speaker 1: done some things and made ourselves cry. Ain't that right? 151 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:24,120 Speaker 1: J Man? Hallelujah? Yeah, they don't ever cry, but you 152 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:27,720 Speaker 1: don't cry in front of him when they come to 153 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:32,240 Speaker 1: you with just an accusation, damn, what you're doing in here? 154 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 1: They room sleeping? And then he put his head and 155 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:39,800 Speaker 1: started crying. Then she faced time, the woman, and she 156 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,000 Speaker 1: told me that my man has been sending mixed signals. 157 00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:47,760 Speaker 1: She wouldn't confirm or deny that they had sex. Now 158 00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:50,560 Speaker 1: he tried to fix it. Now that's too late. Now 159 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,320 Speaker 1: you had your hand in your head in your hand, crying, 160 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:56,360 Speaker 1: and she didn't FaceTime your damn girl. And now here 161 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,880 Speaker 1: he goes this he this is fixed right here, he 162 00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:02,559 Speaker 1: swears he sleeps on the couch. It's too late for that. 163 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:12,679 Speaker 1: And after you cried, that's like a boy, what no, 164 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,320 Speaker 1: why he can't cry? And then the eleven year old 165 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:20,800 Speaker 1: don't have a fact straight. The couch is in the 166 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:28,120 Speaker 1: bedroom whatever. They live in a one bedroom and it's 167 00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:31,440 Speaker 1: in now working out, Steve. I love and now you 168 00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:33,439 Speaker 1: know I sleep in my drawers and I don't want 169 00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:35,880 Speaker 1: my daughter to come out and see me legs all 170 00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:39,320 Speaker 1: over sleeping on the couch out in. Now, that's why 171 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:44,240 Speaker 1: I'm in that. I can't stand huh number the one 172 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:49,840 Speaker 1: night stand for me? Do learn how to hold yourself together? 173 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:55,520 Speaker 1: And then she says, I know his daughter knows a 174 00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:57,439 Speaker 1: whole lot more, but he told me to leave her 175 00:10:57,480 --> 00:10:59,960 Speaker 1: out of it. She started all this? Or why can't? 176 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:04,679 Speaker 1: I asked her? Shelley told you, why are you talking 177 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:08,040 Speaker 1: to any eleven year old? Ain't she told you enough? 178 00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: She has enough information? You got all the information he 179 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:17,120 Speaker 1: told you. He cried with his head and his head 180 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:20,040 Speaker 1: to I knew you were gonna be mad. This ain't 181 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:24,319 Speaker 1: the time for that. Do you cry when you buy yourself? 182 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:43,960 Speaker 1: Come on? I love it what I was wanted to 183 00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:52,440 Speaker 1: go that far? You lad that kissing me, but by 184 00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:57,240 Speaker 1: shut on my chest and I ain't don't want to 185 00:11:57,240 --> 00:12:02,120 Speaker 1: do so, I you know, was it? She nicked me 186 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:06,679 Speaker 1: on my chest? I didn't know what to do. I 187 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:10,160 Speaker 1: was holding her about it back of her head. You 188 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:16,800 Speaker 1: tell kissing me hard? He just kissing too hard? It was. 189 00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,880 Speaker 1: It was kissing just wayn't too hard and nickname you know. 190 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:25,119 Speaker 1: I was just oh, no, Jesus. I had my clothes 191 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:35,000 Speaker 1: off and I couldn't find my shoe in the morning, 192 00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,679 Speaker 1: like when I try to come on. That's why I 193 00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:39,200 Speaker 1: was late coming home the next day because I couldn't 194 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:43,880 Speaker 1: find my shoe. And then she got a dog, and 195 00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:45,800 Speaker 1: next day ain't got no. The dog had took the 196 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:49,520 Speaker 1: house and and bearded with your bone. And that's why 197 00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:52,200 Speaker 1: I had to take prediconting by the new shoes because 198 00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:55,880 Speaker 1: I had a way come hold, because I coudn't try 199 00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 1: back for the cost of gas pedal get caught. Tweet 200 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:04,800 Speaker 1: my toes week us. All right, thank you Steve for 201 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:10,079 Speaker 1: that reenactment. Poster comments on today's Drubberry letter at Steve 202 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:13,080 Speaker 1: Harvey FM. Okay on Instagram and Facebook. Coming up at 203 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:16,640 Speaker 1: forty six minutes after Junior with Sports Talk. Right after this, 204 00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,000 Speaker 1: you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.