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Speaker 1: Welcome guys to another new episode of Couch Talks. This

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Speaker 1: is Cat. I'm your host, and I am excited because

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Speaker 1: we have a guest for couch Talks. This is my

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Speaker 1: first couch Talks, is it? I don't know. I mean

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Speaker 1: it is, yeah, on the podcast before, but not a

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Speaker 1: couch Talk. Yeah. If you don't recognize the voice we

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Speaker 1: have Amy, Amy Brown, Welcome, Welcome, thank you, Hi, happy

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Speaker 1: to be here. You're welcoming yourself. Yes, if you are

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Speaker 1: new or newer to you Need Therapy podcast and you're

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Speaker 1: like couch Talks, what is that? Couch Talks is the

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Speaker 1: bonus episode that we do every single Wednesday where I

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Speaker 1: answer questions that you guys send in and you can

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Speaker 1: send this into Catherine at you Need Therapy Podcast dot

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Speaker 1: com and maybe one day I will get to your question. Now,

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Speaker 1: that can be kind of confusing because you're sending questions

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Speaker 1: to a licensed therapist and then she's somewhat answering them

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Speaker 1: on air. I want to stay on air, but we're

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Speaker 1: not on air on a podcast, on a podcast. But

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Speaker 1: I do want to remind you guys that this podcast

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Speaker 1: is not therapy and doesn't serve as a replacement. However,

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Speaker 1: it could aid in the addition to your therapy or

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Speaker 1: encourage you to go to therapy, which is great, might

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Speaker 1: do I agree? Yeah? So this week, the reason we

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Speaker 1: have a guest is because it's need a Week, and

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Speaker 1: need a Week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. It's

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Speaker 1: a very special week. Very I only started to even

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Speaker 1: know something existed that, Like in the last two years,

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Speaker 1: I had no idea Need a Week was a thing.

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Speaker 1: And I've had a needing disorder. Well, my eating disorder

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Speaker 1: started when I was maybe thirteen, and then I'm forty.

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Speaker 1: I'm turning forty one. So we weren't doing very good

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Speaker 1: job of bringing those I don't know, there was not

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Speaker 1: aware disconnect. There was a disconnect. Yeah, But I love

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Speaker 1: this week, not because like I'm not celebrating eating disorders.

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Speaker 1: What we're doing is bringing awareness to them and talking

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Speaker 1: about them and putting information out that can either help

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Speaker 1: you or help somebody, you know, because there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of misconceptions about eating disorders and I like to

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Speaker 1: bring light to a lot of that stuff. Because I

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Speaker 1: don't know if you felt this way, maybe not amy

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Speaker 1: because you were, like I've had one for a very

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Speaker 1: long time. A lot of people think that they are

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Speaker 1: just about body image and the way you look, and

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Speaker 1: they're vain and why don't you just eat? And there's

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Speaker 1: so much more complexities. Yeah, well not even like why

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Speaker 1: don't you just see? It's why don't you just stop

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Speaker 1: eating when you're full? Or why don't you just stop purging?

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Speaker 1: Or whatever it is that you're behavior, because there's so

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Speaker 1: many different kinds of eating disorders, and I think people

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Speaker 1: just think of one I did, and I'm gonna link

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Speaker 1: some other episodes that I've done on this topic in

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Speaker 1: the show notes. But I did one episode where I

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Speaker 1: just talked about the different types because people don't realize that,

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Speaker 1: like an eating disorder isn't the same for every single person.

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Speaker 1: So we're going to talk about it today, okay. And

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Speaker 1: I asked you guys for your questions on Instagram and

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Speaker 1: you sent me some and we're gonna try to do

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Speaker 1: like three to four. And I'm speaking as someone who

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Speaker 1: is in recovery, and then Kat is speaking as the expert,

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Speaker 1: so yeah, and in recovery, so I get both sides.

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Speaker 1: You just get one second. I just get one side,

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Speaker 1: and I mean somewhat of an expert, though your a

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Speaker 1: lot of conversations with a lot of I don't know,

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Speaker 1: is there like a podcast degree, because like I don't,

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Speaker 1: I don't have the credentials. So just I'm I'm thankful

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Speaker 1: to be in a place where I get to have open,

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Speaker 1: honest conversations about it, where there's no shame or judgment.

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Speaker 1: And that's wonderful that we get to connect with people

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Speaker 1: in that way, because I think I would have benefited

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Speaker 1: from conversations like this, especially my younger self. But I

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Speaker 1: by no means and an expert at all. And that's

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Speaker 1: why I just wanted to clarify because sometimes what I say,

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Speaker 1: which you'll catch me, but I don't want to be

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Speaker 1: a trigger to anybody, or I don't want to say

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Speaker 1: anything that would harm anybody in any way. I'm really

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Speaker 1: glad you said that, because I talked about this a

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Speaker 1: lot on the podcast. But I get really frustrated and

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Speaker 1: very very disappointed when I see people out there with

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Speaker 1: influence or maybe they don't even have a lot of influence,

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Speaker 1: but putting information out on a topic that is as

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Speaker 1: delicate as an eating disorder, is that is not true

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Speaker 1: or is like a version of the truth that is

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Speaker 1: twisted and turned a little bit so we're going to

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Speaker 1: have some expert experience in some just human experience sick

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Speaker 1: and I will say we talked about or I have

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Speaker 1: I don't know if we talked about on your podcast

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Speaker 1: Too Dopsic and how obsessed with that show I was.

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Speaker 1: And if you have not watched that, I highly recommend

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Speaker 1: watching it, however trigger warding. It can be hard to watch.

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Speaker 1: But it's all about the opioid epidemic. And you know,

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Speaker 1: something that we used to think or it used to

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Speaker 1: be true, is that addiction to opiates was one of

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Speaker 1: the most deadly like mental health crisis that we had.

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Speaker 1: But right now, the highest mortality rate of any mental

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Speaker 1: health disorder comes from eating disorders. I did not know that.

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Speaker 1: You didn't know that. I didn't know it surpassed other

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Speaker 1: things if you was, you know, name three. I don't

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Speaker 1: think Guy would have put it as a top one. Obviously,

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Speaker 1: I know that that's there's a lot of tragedy that

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Speaker 1: comes from eating disorders, but I don't know. I just

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Speaker 1: would figure other things would fall in line first. That's wild. Okay, Well,

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Speaker 1: so even more of a reason why this conversation or

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Speaker 1: having these conversations wherever you're having them as long as

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Speaker 1: again there's the expert involved, it's important. Okay, So we

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Speaker 1: better get to the question. Yes, okay, So I'm going

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Speaker 1: to ask the question. I'm going to see if you

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Speaker 1: want to give feedback first, and then we'll just bounce

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Speaker 1: and see what happens. Guy. Okay, So the first question

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Speaker 1: is what are your thoughts on over Eaters anonymous and

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Speaker 1: UM using vibe ants for binge eating disorder? Okay, Well,

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Speaker 1: I've gone to one over Eaters Anonymous meeting in my

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Speaker 1: early twenties and I never went back. I think I

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Speaker 1: was just so thankful to know that I wasn't alone.

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Speaker 1: Why didn't you go back? It wasn't somewhere and maybe

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Speaker 1: there was still some shame. I felt uncomfortable. I didn't

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Speaker 1: know anybody there. It was comforting again, like I said,

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Speaker 1: to know, I think that, like honestly, I ate my

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Speaker 1: way there, Like I think I went to a gas

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Speaker 1: station and I was like, I'm gonna get always sacks,

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Speaker 1: you know whatever, candies or cookies or whatever. I just

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Speaker 1: know it was a particularly hard day and it landed

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Speaker 1: me there. But I guess I just wasn't fully ready.

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Speaker 1: You have to be ready for something like that, UM,

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Speaker 1: and be committed, and I just didn't even know really

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Speaker 1: where I fell. But nobody talked about over eating the

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Speaker 1: fact though. This was early two thousands, so there wasn't

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Speaker 1: this Instagram community where there was all these influencers you

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Speaker 1: could follow that were being vulnerable and sharing with you

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Speaker 1: about there, or not even just influencers, but experts or

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Speaker 1: like hashtags, or you can search things out. I honestly

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Speaker 1: don't even know that we really googled a lot back then.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I googled it, or maybe I saw it somewhere

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Speaker 1: or looked it up in the phone book. I don't

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Speaker 1: know how I even found this meeting, but I know

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Speaker 1: it was in North Austin, and I know that I went.

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Speaker 1: It almost feels like a dream as I'm telling that happened.

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Speaker 1: And I'm making this up right, because sometimes you are

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Speaker 1: in it on the really hard days, it's almost like

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Speaker 1: you are having an out of body. You're not connected. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's the whole You're just connects you. Yeah, so you

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Speaker 1: went once, and you the goodness you got from it

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Speaker 1: was that I've got the sense that I wasn't alone.

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Speaker 1: I'm not alone, okay, which is amazing and I love that.

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Speaker 1: And if that's what you can take from one of

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Speaker 1: those meetings, then I'm all for it. I have never

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Speaker 1: been personally a huge fan of these meetings. There's also

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Speaker 1: something called e d A, which is Eating Disorders Anonymous,

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Speaker 1: which encompasses all eating disorders that I'm really pro that

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Speaker 1: it's hard to find those meetings now. They do do

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Speaker 1: them online um these days. But the reason that I'm

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Speaker 1: not super into o A is because they have in

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Speaker 1: the past. It could have changed, but when I was

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Speaker 1: more familiar and when I've had clients and people in

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Speaker 1: my life go into those meetings, they did preach and

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Speaker 1: encourage that you abstain from any food that you've binged.

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Speaker 1: So it was like sobriety. So if your bench food

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Speaker 1: was chips, then you're not allow to eat chips anymore,

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Speaker 1: and a relapse would be you eating chips, even if

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Speaker 1: you're eating it in an appropriate way. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: could get how for some people that might work if

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Speaker 1: you have a specific bend food, but yeah, I mean

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Speaker 1: sometimes it really didn't. I didn't always stick to one

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Speaker 1: food then you can never eat if if it was

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Speaker 1: like candy, it's like, can you never have any candy again?

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Speaker 1: And I just think that can be a really toxic

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Speaker 1: way to find healing because it can that can just

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Speaker 1: turn into another type of eating disorder. Right. It sounds

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Speaker 1: very restrictive to me. And the reason I think eating

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Speaker 1: disorders are one of the hardest things to work with

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Speaker 1: is it's your need food to survive. Yeah, and it's

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Speaker 1: like you're about to say, when it's like you're teaching

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Speaker 1: somebody how to like responsibly use their drug of choice. Right,

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Speaker 1: So it would be like if you came to my

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Speaker 1: office and you're like, Okay, I'm addicted to cocaine and

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Speaker 1: needed to teach me how to like use it in

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Speaker 1: a healthy, positive way, and that sounds crazy. But with food,

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Speaker 1: we kind of have to do that. And so I'm

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Speaker 1: not a huge fan of o A. However, if it's

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Speaker 1: something that if you're going to it, all you take

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Speaker 1: from it is, oh my gosh, I'm not alone in this,

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Speaker 1: go for it, but be very mindful of what they

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Speaker 1: encourage in what kind of like I want to say,

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Speaker 1: that's like a food rule to me. And well, and

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Speaker 1: I'm going to say they probably have overall themes that

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Speaker 1: they follow or it's a it's a twelve step program,

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Speaker 1: but each chapter might it might be full of different

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Speaker 1: people in different relationships you might make I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I'm just thinking of like, like I know people the

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Speaker 1: do A A and they might go to one meeting

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Speaker 1: and they don't like it there, but then across town

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Speaker 1: they'll drive twenty minutes to go to this other meeting

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Speaker 1: because it's a solid meeting for them, like more impactful

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Speaker 1: and like actually a good place for them. Okay, Well,

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Speaker 1: I just looked up some o A criticism and I

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Speaker 1: never really find any online. I mean, I'm sure I

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Speaker 1: could not like a like group on Reddit that's like

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Speaker 1: just bashing it, not that I can see at the moment.

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Speaker 1: But also we're not here to bash like any particular

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Speaker 1: thing because it might be helpful to somebody. But this

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Speaker 1: is just different things can work for different people. This

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Speaker 1: is just what I've seen and how it's not been

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Speaker 1: helpful in the way that I work for myself and

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Speaker 1: with clients. It doesn't have the same kind of ideology

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Speaker 1: behind recovery that I see work. But I think that

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Speaker 1: speaks to just recovery in general. There's not one way

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Speaker 1: to do it, and thinking that there's just one way

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Speaker 1: to do it, you can get us in trouble. It's dangerous. Yes.

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Speaker 1: So the other part of that question was, I have

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Speaker 1: some feelings on this, but what are your thoughts on

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Speaker 1: using vibe ats for binge eating? Well, I've taken that,

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Speaker 1: but did you take it for binge eating? Well? I

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Speaker 1: took it for both, knowing that I have a d

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Speaker 1: h D and that I'm a binge eater. But did

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Speaker 1: I relay the binge eating to my practitioner. No. I

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Speaker 1: did it for the d h D. But secretly, deep

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Speaker 1: down inside, I'm like, this is gonna be my magic pill,

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Speaker 1: because this one, I know. I for sure saw commercials

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Speaker 1: about you know, I'd be watching something and then it'd

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Speaker 1: be like, do you over eat? Wait, they had commercials

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Speaker 1: for vibe in it. This was probably two thousand and fifteen.

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Speaker 1: I remember specifically work. I was working at a treatment

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Speaker 1: center in an eating disorder program when it got approved,

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Speaker 1: and I remember getting an article and it was very

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Speaker 1: sad to me to read that article. But for you,

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Speaker 1: you're like, oh my gosh, yes, I do that could

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Speaker 1: help me. I was like, this could help me focus

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Speaker 1: and concentrate at work. But then also this, this is

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Speaker 1: gonna be my cure to eating too much and I

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Speaker 1: would put myself in that binge category. I did have

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Speaker 1: a season where I wasn't purging in any way, probably

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Speaker 1: working out too much. I learned later in recovery that

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Speaker 1: over exercising is a form of purging as well. It

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Speaker 1: doesn't have to be actually the physical act of purging.

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Speaker 1: In fact, a book that I love that helped me

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Speaker 1: in my recovery was called brain over Binge, and the

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Speaker 1: author of it she binged and purged, but her purging

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Speaker 1: was always working out. She never that was mine threw up.

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Speaker 1: So for me though, I had like twelve years where

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Speaker 1: I didn't throw up, so I thought I didn't have

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Speaker 1: an eating disorder. But I was eating like would have.

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Speaker 1: I would binge restrict like I would not eat, and

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Speaker 1: then I would just eat uncontrollably. But I learned a

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Speaker 1: lot through brain over Binge that my brain was like,

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Speaker 1: you don't give us food. You don't give you're not

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Speaker 1: giving me any food. So therefore when you do give

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Speaker 1: me food, I'm gonna eat the heck out of it

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Speaker 1: because I don't know when you're gonna feed me again.

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Speaker 1: And so that's where I had to go in and

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Speaker 1: break that cycle. But it was a mental thing. And

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Speaker 1: I think one of the questions we get to later

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Speaker 1: is gonna talk about I have a mental answer for

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Speaker 1: it of like what I just had to tell my brain.

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Speaker 1: But with the purging, it did come back after my

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Speaker 1: mom passed away in two thousand fourteen, so I was

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Speaker 1: still doing binge restrict but then the purging had come back,

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Speaker 1: and I was desperate for anything. And that's when I

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Speaker 1: started seeing the Vibance commercials and I'm like, this is

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Speaker 1: my miracle drug. I'm going to be cured. I'm going

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Speaker 1: to take this. My life is going to be better,

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Speaker 1: Like I was convinced of that. Well, I had taken

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Speaker 1: adderall before and didn't have the best ex varience with

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Speaker 1: it at all, but I thought, well, this is different

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Speaker 1: than after all, I don't know, help me focus, which

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Speaker 1: it did for a time. And then I was focusing

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Speaker 1: like all day long because it's a fives is a

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Speaker 1: time release, and it was altering my personality. My mouth

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Speaker 1: was still getting really dry like it did on AfterAll,

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Speaker 1: I started feel uncomfortable. I was still swinging, I wasn't

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Speaker 1: sleeping great, and also I was still over eating, and

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Speaker 1: so then I thought something was wrong with me, like

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Speaker 1: I'm broken I'm the person didn't fix you, right, I'm

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Speaker 1: the person that can't take this pill. But again, I

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Speaker 1: wasn't talking to a medical professional about that because I

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Speaker 1: wasn't taking the pill for that reason. Did you talk

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Speaker 1: to doctors about binging ever? No? Because no, never shame embarrassing.

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Speaker 1: I didn't ever feel comfortable talking about that. Part. Of course,

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Speaker 1: I was able to say to some people at certain times,

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Speaker 1: I'm but mick. But there's like more shame. Well, I

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Speaker 1: had shame, and to BlimE me, don't get me wrong,

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Speaker 1: but there's it with shame for me with over eating, well,

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Speaker 1: because it's this like out of the ideas, like you're

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Speaker 1: out of control. And I hate that because and if

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Speaker 1: anybody is listening to this, like all of these behaviors

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Speaker 1: that we're using, whether it's restricting or binging or purging

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Speaker 1: or you're purging through exercise, they're literally all the same thing.

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Speaker 1: You're just picking a different one. And like the only

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Speaker 1: reason I picked exercise over actually like throwing up, is

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Speaker 1: because I couldn't do it same things she couldn't do. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I would have been doing that, And I just hate that,

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Speaker 1: Like we've put different like labels of this one's good,

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Speaker 1: and this one's worse. And this is I hear all

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Speaker 1: the time. Well I wish I had that eating disorder

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Speaker 1: and not eating disorder, Like why couldn't I just like

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Speaker 1: not eat? Yes, And it's like they're really all the

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Speaker 1: same thing. And I just want you guys to know listening,

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Speaker 1: if you're struggling with bench eating, like somebody who's restricting

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Speaker 1: is not any better than you at all. No, And

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Speaker 1: and it's not like they have more willpower than you

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Speaker 1: because a lot of those people, I mean, I know

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Speaker 1: for me in my most restrictive parts of my life,

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Speaker 1: like I couldn't eat if I wanted to, Like I

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Speaker 1: had no control. I didn't have the control to make

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Speaker 1: a healthy choice for myself. So it wasn't like I

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Speaker 1: was all I put together and all of that. So

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Speaker 1: it didn't work for you. No, I ended up having

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Speaker 1: to get off of it because not it wasn't doing

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Speaker 1: what I needed it to do, even for my A

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Speaker 1: d h D. And it then was messing with me

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Speaker 1: in such a way because then, like I said, I

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Speaker 1: just felt like I was something was wrong with me.

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Speaker 1: And so then I'm like I remember going back to

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Speaker 1: pick up my prescription and then one time my prescription,

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Speaker 1: Like I couldn't get it. It was late, and I

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Speaker 1: was like freaking out because I'm like, I need this,

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Speaker 1: I need this, and then that's a scary place to

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Speaker 1: be because I didn't. So anyway, I got off of

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Speaker 1: it and it wasn't for me. But I don't know

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Speaker 1: your thoughts on it, So I have my own feelings

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Speaker 1: and beliefs and thoughts on it. And it is not

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Speaker 1: a one size fits all. Vivance for binge eating kind

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Speaker 1: of feels a little bit like harm reduction to me,

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Speaker 1: and there's a time and a place for that. I

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Speaker 1: think that there's a time and a place for using

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Speaker 1: different ways of helping someone heal for a disorder based

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Speaker 1: on that specific situation. So I'm saying all that very

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Speaker 1: carefully because it's not a one size fits all. However,

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Speaker 1: VI vance the way that that it is not designed

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Speaker 1: to work for this, because it wasn't designed for eating disorders.

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Speaker 1: But the way that now it's prescribed is because it

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Speaker 1: does suppress your appetite. So what it's not doing is

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Speaker 1: teaching you any kind of connection with your body, any

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Speaker 1: kind of connection mind, body spirit. It's not teaching you

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Speaker 1: any skill. It's not allowing you to sit with discomfort.

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Speaker 1: It's not allowing you to build agency and power in

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Speaker 1: yourself to make good choices. It's just suppressing your appetite. Well,

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Speaker 1: and one of the big parts of my healing, and

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Speaker 1: I say healing because I was having to. I'm still

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Speaker 1: in a place of healing. I'm actively pursuing therapy, he

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Speaker 1: and different things that I know that are good for

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Speaker 1: me mind, body, and spirit. So I think if I

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Speaker 1: was someone that needed to take it in conjunction with

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Speaker 1: a recovery process, but I was looking at it as

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Speaker 1: a pill that was going to fix me when I happened,

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Speaker 1: don't take the pill anymore, right, or you go to

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Speaker 1: the pharmacy and you can't get it in a a day.

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Speaker 1: But I wasn't putting in the work to rewire like

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Speaker 1: I had to rewire my brain. And that took work,

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Speaker 1: and that took repetitiveness and hitting rock bottom and just

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Speaker 1: wanting that to be sitting in a lot of discomfort, Yes,

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Speaker 1: and I had to kept I revisited it sometimes like

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Speaker 1: five times in the same minute because I was re

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Speaker 1: training my brain. And if I'm taking a miracle thing,

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Speaker 1: which I do, like what you're saying too, because if

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Speaker 1: I if someone might need something in conjunction with something else,

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Speaker 1: but if you're thinking you just take something and it's

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Speaker 1: like wallog and fix everything, it's not, at least for me,

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Speaker 1: because much of my stuff with stuff I needed to

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Speaker 1: actually work through. Yeah, and I'm a big believer of

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Speaker 1: medication when it comes to mental health, like I all

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Speaker 1: day long. Yes, if if that's going to be something

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Speaker 1: that is really positive and helpful for you, I support it.

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Speaker 1: And every like I said, every case is different. But

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Speaker 1: if we're taking this just as in like an easy

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Speaker 1: way and I haven't really tried the other stuff, it

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Speaker 1: does create another problem because what you're not doing is

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Speaker 1: like healing the relationship with your body, and healing the

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Speaker 1: relationship your body has to like hunger cues, you're not

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Speaker 1: actually helping get those back, you're deleting them. I'm in

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Speaker 1: like year two of recovery and I'm still figuring out

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Speaker 1: my hunger And yeah, I'm okay with that, and I

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Speaker 1: know that that's okay, and I know I no longer

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Speaker 1: have this mentality of like, oh it's me, I'm broken,

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Speaker 1: what's wrong with me? It's just like, well, I mean,

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Speaker 1: what do you think I confused my body for more

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Speaker 1: than twenty years. Like almost like if once I hit

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Speaker 1: mid forties, if I hadn't have gotten the help that

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Speaker 1: I needed it, I was gonna say, you're not in

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Speaker 1: your mid forties, so but I'm about to be. I'm

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Speaker 1: about to be forty one, And I'd feel like when

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Speaker 1: I say I'm in my late thirties and I'm going

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Speaker 1: to be forty one next month, and I'm just saying

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Speaker 1: in a couple more years, if I hadn't gotten help,

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Speaker 1: I'd be living thirty years in a lot of agony.

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Speaker 1: And you know we hear from on our Outweigh podcast,

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Speaker 1: which is specifically for disordered eating conversations. We've had listeners

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Speaker 1: the email us that are sixty sixty five years old

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Speaker 1: and they've been living with it. And I then, I

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Speaker 1: then have gratitude for those that have gone before me

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Speaker 1: and have been an encouragement to me and where I am.

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Speaker 1: And I'm thankful that I crossed paths with certain people

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Speaker 1: online that were a big part of my recovery, Lisa

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Speaker 1: Hame being one of them with her well Necessities program

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Speaker 1: for the Noise So Good and the Brain over Binge

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Speaker 1: book like I'm in send and then even getting to

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Speaker 1: know you. But I only learned about brain over Binge

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00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:08,040
Speaker 1: because I followed Kale Junkie, who I've never met in person.

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Speaker 1: She lives in California, and start of following around Instagram

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Speaker 1: and she posted but thank goodness, she was bone roaled

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Speaker 1: about about her story and posted about this book. You

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Speaker 1: know what I want to say to this goes back

401
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Speaker 1: to something you said earlier when we're talking about OA

402
00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 1: is the most important healing agent in any of this stuff, really,

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00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:25,600
Speaker 1: in anything we're struggling with when it comes to mental health.

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00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:29,240
Speaker 1: Is feeling like you're not alone is connection. That's literally

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00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:31,840
Speaker 1: the opposite of addiction. And I view a lot of

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Speaker 1: eating disorders from an addictive lens. The opposite of addiction

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Speaker 1: is connection. So the more that we're hiding from our

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Speaker 1: eating disorders and we're hiding from our behaviors and and

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Speaker 1: we're taking that blanket of shame and we're just like

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Speaker 1: you know, wrapping it all around us really tightly, the

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00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:48,760
Speaker 1: farther away we are going to get from like true,

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Speaker 1: true healing, the more we can actually talk about this

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Speaker 1: even that's the point of this podcast. And I know

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Speaker 1: outweigh and I know That's one of the reasons that

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00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:59,520
Speaker 1: you do for things with Amy Brown podcast is so

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00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,880
Speaker 1: people feel like they're not alone and right. But even

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Speaker 1: in the beginning of that podcast, because that was before

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Speaker 1: my recovery, I was hiding it. But now I was

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Speaker 1: hiding it. Note but I was also spreading toxic, harmful,

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Speaker 1: triggering information that I thought was quote unquote healthy, and

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Speaker 1: I was encouraging my listens to participate. But now I

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Speaker 1: know better, And that's the great thing. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: And you're not being shamed. What you're not doing is

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Speaker 1: let's shame. Just be like, well, I'll never do a

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Speaker 1: podcast you're gonna or I never want to talk about it.

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Speaker 1: You're saying, yeah, this sucks and I hate that I

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Speaker 1: did that, but I'm going to like talk about it

428
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:34,440
Speaker 1: because the more I talk about it, the less shame

429
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,840
Speaker 1: I feel about what I've done. Right, And then it's

430
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:40,560
Speaker 1: just this also permission and reminder that we can all

431
00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,840
Speaker 1: grow and evolve and learn and we don't have to

432
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:46,760
Speaker 1: be stuff. And yeah, there isn't shame if hey, yeah,

433
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:49,000
Speaker 1: I didn't have it all figured out that then, and

434
00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:51,280
Speaker 1: you know what, I might say stuff now that three

435
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 1: years from now, I might come back and be like, wow,

436
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:55,320
Speaker 1: I can't believe I said that. But yeah, so glad

437
00:21:55,359 --> 00:21:58,479
Speaker 1: I learned and grew. We'll see. I don't know me too.

438
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:01,040
Speaker 1: Don't hate on people for change. We talked about this

439
00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 1: on speaking of four things. I think the fifth thing

440
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:06,320
Speaker 1: when we quote quoted Charlemagne the post he put up,

441
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 1: which was delete the old version of me. It expired. Amen, Amen,

442
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:17,520
Speaker 1: Except for all those podcasts are still up. Candle light them.

443
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:21,359
Speaker 1: But that person has changed. Okay, question number two really

444
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,160
Speaker 1: question number three, But we're going to say number two,

445
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:27,040
Speaker 1: what is some advice on not slipping into bad habits

446
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:30,879
Speaker 1: when you're stressed? But I'm going to rephrase this a

447
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 1: little bit. I am going to say, what is some

448
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:40,280
Speaker 1: advice on not slipping into maladaptive unhealthy habits when you're stressed?

449
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:45,480
Speaker 1: Take that bad the judgment out of it. Maladaptive? Do

450
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:48,320
Speaker 1: you want to look up the definition? Have you heard

451
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,359
Speaker 1: that word before? Okay? Not providing adequate or appropriate adjustment

452
00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:55,879
Speaker 1: to the environment or situation. So not helpful. There you go,

453
00:22:56,680 --> 00:23:01,960
Speaker 1: love it the day from their all adaptive behavior. Now

454
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 1: you have to use that, okay, every day this week

455
00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:07,520
Speaker 1: in a sentence. Well, let me just really drill it

456
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,840
Speaker 1: in here. Maladaptive behaviors are those that stop you from

457
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:14,439
Speaker 1: adapting to newer, difficult circumstances. They can start after a

458
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:17,680
Speaker 1: major life change, illness, or traumatic event. It could also

459
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:20,120
Speaker 1: be a habit you picked up at an early age.

460
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:23,640
Speaker 1: You can identify maladaptive behaviors and replace them with more

461
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:27,399
Speaker 1: productive ones. There you go, Okay, So yeah, we're reframing

462
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:29,959
Speaker 1: the question. This person is looking for advice on how

463
00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:32,959
Speaker 1: do I not go back into those like coping skills

464
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:34,960
Speaker 1: that I picked up that are no longer helping me

465
00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:37,080
Speaker 1: when I get really stressed out, which might be when

466
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:40,080
Speaker 1: you're most susceptible to falling into old behaviors, which could

467
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:44,399
Speaker 1: be eating disorder behaviors. It could be been shopping, it

468
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 1: could be anything, really, men, women, whatever you choose to numb.

469
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:53,399
Speaker 1: Because for me, my eating sort of was just numbing, numbing,

470
00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:56,800
Speaker 1: numbing all the time, numbing. It wasn't there until a

471
00:23:56,880 --> 00:24:00,639
Speaker 1: therapist in late that I had And it was actually

472
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:03,920
Speaker 1: a therapist for my son that did intensive with the parents.

473
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:06,840
Speaker 1: I have an adopted son and adopted daughter, but I

474
00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:11,160
Speaker 1: was working with him. And really, when you have any

475
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 1: child in your life that has had trauma, which I

476
00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 1: adopted older children, so that's a given. They've already been

477
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:19,640
Speaker 1: separated from their birth parents. They lived in an orphanage

478
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 1: for years their trauma. So you have to be a

479
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 1: healing parent. And in order for you to be a

480
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:27,120
Speaker 1: healing parent, if you're working with therapists, they want to like, see,

481
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,240
Speaker 1: let's where where are you? Where are you at? How

482
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:31,199
Speaker 1: can you be the most effective parent because if you

483
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:33,840
Speaker 1: don't dig deep and work on your stuff. So anyway,

484
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 1: we're talking, and he made me do that exercise. We're

485
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:37,720
Speaker 1: sitting in a chair and you talk to yourself in

486
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:41,640
Speaker 1: a chair, you know, and we do this whole thing,

487
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:45,439
Speaker 1: and it came out in that session that you know,

488
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:47,480
Speaker 1: my eating center started when I was a teenager. I

489
00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:50,919
Speaker 1: was talking to my child self. And then you know,

490
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:55,800
Speaker 1: my husband was there as someone that has spent much

491
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,479
Speaker 1: of my adult life with me. We've been married fifteen

492
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:01,440
Speaker 1: sixteen years, and and he talked about how my eating

493
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:04,600
Speaker 1: disorder has affected our marriage, says on this whole and

494
00:25:04,640 --> 00:25:06,640
Speaker 1: I'm like, wait, if though we're talking about being healing parents,

495
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:09,880
Speaker 1: but the truth is just like I brought that eating

496
00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:13,240
Speaker 1: disorder into my marriage. I brought that eating disorder into

497
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:19,639
Speaker 1: my parent child relationships as well. And the therapist said, yeah,

498
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:22,760
Speaker 1: I mean, well, let's let's unpack this a little bit more, because,

499
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,639
Speaker 1: in his opinion, I'm curious about yours. He said in

500
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 1: eating disorders Underlying depression. No one had ever said that

501
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:33,480
Speaker 1: to me before, because I was like, well, huh, what,

502
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,679
Speaker 1: I'm not depressed, and he's like, yeah, you are, in

503
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:40,040
Speaker 1: eating disorders underlying depression. So I don't know your thoughts

504
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 1: on that, but I do know that I was using

505
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:46,760
Speaker 1: my eating disorder for all of those years to numb

506
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:50,840
Speaker 1: pain so that I wasn't feeling. And then depression doesn't

507
00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:53,159
Speaker 1: have to look like for some people it might, but

508
00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:55,159
Speaker 1: for others it may not be your You can be

509
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 1: like a functioning alcoholic, you can be like a functioning

510
00:25:57,320 --> 00:26:01,600
Speaker 1: depressed person. Yeah, I'm unpacked. I actually never heard somebody

511
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:04,680
Speaker 1: say that. I can understand what he's saying, and that

512
00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 1: I think that I see eating disorders more as they

513
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:13,239
Speaker 1: can be like best friends with depression. They could exacerbate depression. Um,

514
00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:16,239
Speaker 1: depression can't exacerbate an eating disorder. But I hear what

515
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 1: he's saying in that. What I was thinking as you

516
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:21,360
Speaker 1: were talking, though, is I believe that a lot of

517
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:23,400
Speaker 1: the things that we do in our eating disorders, these

518
00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:27,360
Speaker 1: coping skills that we pick up their solutions to problems, right,

519
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:29,440
Speaker 1: And so there's solutions to problems, and at some point

520
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,680
Speaker 1: they're working, and so we keep using them, and then

521
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,800
Speaker 1: at some point they start causing more harm than good.

522
00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:38,679
Speaker 1: And like I said earlier, the addiction is the opposite

523
00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 1: of connection. And so if I'm really really honed in

524
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 1: on these behaviors that disconnect me, how is anybody in

525
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:49,159
Speaker 1: my life going to connect to me? How are my

526
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:51,479
Speaker 1: kids going to connect to me? How is my husband

527
00:26:51,520 --> 00:26:53,479
Speaker 1: or my wife or my partner going to connect to me.

528
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 1: I'm not connecting to myself. My behaviors are all rooted

529
00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,679
Speaker 1: and cutting myself off and numbing, right, So how am

530
00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 1: I going to expect people to be able to get

531
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:04,720
Speaker 1: in there? But that's really all we ever really want.

532
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:07,960
Speaker 1: We want connection. So it's like the opposite. So I

533
00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 1: do believe that like not having that does just open

534
00:27:12,160 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 1: up this perfect little, like beautifully made bed for depression. Right,

535
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:21,119
Speaker 1: I mean it may not be that, it's like, right, Okay,

536
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:22,720
Speaker 1: that's a good way to put it. I mean, really,

537
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,879
Speaker 1: which did do you not have no idea, do you know?

538
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:29,960
Speaker 1: I think we're going to know, But I think that

539
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:33,920
Speaker 1: we can often yes, use these things to nom out

540
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:37,280
Speaker 1: and not face what we're really dealing with. So for me,

541
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:41,560
Speaker 1: I had to first realize it. But obviously, if you're

542
00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:45,720
Speaker 1: asking the question, you're aware, because self awareness is key

543
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:49,080
Speaker 1: during any of this, because self awareness without action is

544
00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:52,480
Speaker 1: basically just like nothing, right, So you have to be

545
00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,800
Speaker 1: self aware and then willing to take action, and that's

546
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: what they're asking. What's the action? Like for me, it

547
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 1: was actively not participating in the behavior, whatever it was.

548
00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:08,120
Speaker 1: I guess for you, what kept you from going back

549
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 1: to it? Because it was so easy at one point. Well,

550
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:13,880
Speaker 1: the rewiring my brain was what I had to do.

551
00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,640
Speaker 1: I was had to get all in and I had

552
00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:20,719
Speaker 1: to practice, like really having a better understanding of my

553
00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:24,199
Speaker 1: brain and what was happening helped me a lot and

554
00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:26,560
Speaker 1: kind of at least this is what I believed what

555
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:28,920
Speaker 1: was happening. I know that for others they might read

556
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 1: brain over binge and be like, wait, what this is

557
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:32,800
Speaker 1: not resonating with me at all, But to me it

558
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:38,480
Speaker 1: made perfect sense, and my brain needed to be rewired

559
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 1: and I had the ability to do that, and so

560
00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:44,880
Speaker 1: every time I wanted to go and go to the pantry,

561
00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: I would go to the pantry and I would walk away.

562
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 1: And I would go to the pantry and I would

563
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 1: walk away. And sometimes I would go to the pantry,

564
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:53,520
Speaker 1: and I mean I walk away from that thing like

565
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 1: five times. But the more I went to it and

566
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,680
Speaker 1: walked away, the more I was not going to use

567
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:02,160
Speaker 1: that as my medicine. Every time I walked away, it

568
00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:04,800
Speaker 1: was almost also empowering to And I wasn't perfect by

569
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:07,960
Speaker 1: any means. Well, there's a perfect the wrong word because

570
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 1: also there wasn't anything wrong with me. If I actually

571
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 1: did open the door, it's like, okay, there was no

572
00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 1: beating myself up. There was no It's key like I

573
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 1: wasn't there. I didn't do anything wrong. I actually was

574
00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:22,520
Speaker 1: in survival and my brain was taking care of me,

575
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 1: and I needed to do what I thought was best

576
00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:26,840
Speaker 1: for me. But also I know that I am I

577
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:30,160
Speaker 1: would remind myself of like I am safe, I am nourished,

578
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:35,240
Speaker 1: I have food, I have support, I have all these things.

579
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,520
Speaker 1: And I would go to the pantry and would walk away,

580
00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:39,800
Speaker 1: but go to the pantry and walk away, go to

581
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:41,600
Speaker 1: the pantrey, I wo to walk away. I'm gonna keep

582
00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,520
Speaker 1: saying that because that's what it felt like. I would

583
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 1: go to the pantry and I would walk away because

584
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:47,800
Speaker 1: the pantry. That was my problem every time I would

585
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:49,800
Speaker 1: go to the pantry. And now you know what, I

586
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:52,000
Speaker 1: can go to my pantry for comfort, but this is

587
00:29:52,000 --> 00:30:02,360
Speaker 1: two years later. I can go to my pantry and

588
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 1: find comfort in food, but there's not this guilt and

589
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:08,560
Speaker 1: shame associated with it. And I'm not I'm not zombie out,

590
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:11,479
Speaker 1: I'm not numbing, I'm not dissociating. I'm very aware. I'm

591
00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:15,320
Speaker 1: actually like, this cookie is doing its job right now, Amon,

592
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 1: love you, cookies, thank you. Where it used to be like,

593
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I just ate a whole freaking box

594
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 1: of cookies and I have no idea what happened. So

595
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 1: for me, it was like I don't want to do

596
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:28,920
Speaker 1: that anymore, so I had to just not do it.

597
00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:33,280
Speaker 1: And I know that sounds so like I that's not advice,

598
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 1: but it might be that I would turn walk away

599
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:37,200
Speaker 1: from the pantry and go for a walk, walk away

600
00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:39,520
Speaker 1: from the pantry, call a friend, walk away from the pantry,

601
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 1: read my book, walk away from the pantry, Go read

602
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 1: a blog about this and not building other it's one

603
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:49,400
Speaker 1: you're you're talking about. I'm not going to beat myself

604
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:53,320
Speaker 1: up for for doing it, because I feel very strongly

605
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:57,120
Speaker 1: about this. It is about consistency and not perfection. So

606
00:30:57,160 --> 00:31:00,560
Speaker 1: I want to be consistent in doing the things actually

607
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:04,280
Speaker 1: are helpful, not perfect. So that's one of those releasing shame.

608
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 1: The other thing is building up other things that help.

609
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:09,240
Speaker 1: So we get stuck on these things thinking that they're

610
00:31:09,280 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: the only thing that helps, and that becomes this like

611
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:14,240
Speaker 1: automatic reaction when there's tons of other skills out there

612
00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:16,840
Speaker 1: that actually can really help you, and there's somes of

613
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 1: different kinds of skills that can help and coping skills,

614
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 1: and there's types of therapy and DBT is really awesome

615
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,239
Speaker 1: to do. Now, when it comes down to it, I

616
00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 1: think what you're also saying without saying is you had

617
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 1: to be willing to sit with a lot of discomfort

618
00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 1: and connect back to your life. That's I think the

619
00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:37,719
Speaker 1: key for you, and it was the key for me,

620
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:40,200
Speaker 1: and I couldn't do it on my own. I had

621
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:44,080
Speaker 1: to have accountability because connecting to my life and getting

622
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:46,280
Speaker 1: into the woods of what actually I thought my eating

623
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:49,000
Speaker 1: disorder was going to help me with was like a

624
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 1: blood bath. And I think that if you've never experienced this,

625
00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:55,280
Speaker 1: you might have no idea what this feels or looks like.

626
00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:57,840
Speaker 1: But like eating disorder recovery, really I would describe it

627
00:31:57,920 --> 00:32:02,560
Speaker 1: as an uphill blood bath. It is so uncomfortable, it

628
00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:05,080
Speaker 1: is so hard. Is it worth it? Yes, But it

629
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:07,520
Speaker 1: takes a lot of time to get to a place

630
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:10,480
Speaker 1: where my automatic thought isn't to beat myself up, isn't

631
00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:13,800
Speaker 1: to go over exercise, isn't to like not eat for

632
00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:16,560
Speaker 1: a certain amount of time, isn't to make a smoothie

633
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,240
Speaker 1: of water and kale. Like That's taken a long time

634
00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:21,400
Speaker 1: for me to get that stuff out of the forefront

635
00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:25,800
Speaker 1: of my brain. So accountability is key, but also willingness

636
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 1: to sit in uncomfortable stuff and tolerate it. That's something

637
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:33,520
Speaker 1: I don't think is who taught all these skills to

638
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:36,080
Speaker 1: like ignore or whatever. But it's like all about like

639
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 1: I need to learn how to tolerate being in my life.

640
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:41,240
Speaker 1: How do I tolerate being my life rather than going

641
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:43,080
Speaker 1: to go do something that takes me out of my life.

642
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:45,320
Speaker 1: So there's a lot of skills that can help with

643
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 1: that that that would take a whole podcast, but things

644
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 1: that bring you into you and your experience rather pull

645
00:32:51,840 --> 00:32:55,120
Speaker 1: me out of And I think that the beating self

646
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:59,560
Speaker 1: up part like happens in stages. I mean, I, well, no,

647
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 1: there's different things to beat yourself up about, and you

648
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,440
Speaker 1: just can't do it in any category, like can I

649
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 1: say something about in recovery, I kind of swapped some

650
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 1: things out for other things, Like I wasn't binging anymore,

651
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:17,520
Speaker 1: but I was counting macros and I didn't realize I

652
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:21,920
Speaker 1: had replaced one for the other. I at least thought, well,

653
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:24,960
Speaker 1: I'm walking away from the pantry, I'm not binging, but

654
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 1: now I'm obsessing over entering things into my Fitness Pal.

655
00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:33,520
Speaker 1: And if I didn't enter it for the day, it's

656
00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:36,520
Speaker 1: like I was going to go crazy, like it was

657
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:40,720
Speaker 1: so uncomfortable. But that, in a way was another one

658
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 1: of these coping mechanisms where I wasn't having to face

659
00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:46,280
Speaker 1: what because not being able to enter in the exact

660
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,720
Speaker 1: calories fat protein that I ate that day carbs shouldn't

661
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:53,000
Speaker 1: send me spinning. It should be like, okay, cool, I'm

662
00:33:53,040 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 1: gonna enter that. I mean, because if you're in a

663
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: place where you can enter that stuff and you want

664
00:33:57,240 --> 00:34:00,600
Speaker 1: it just for facts about your body. It's okay to

665
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:05,280
Speaker 1: want to know macros, but if you're going to not

666
00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 1: be able to sleep, not worth it. That's that's not

667
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:11,720
Speaker 1: worth it. But I I replaced, So I'm saying things

668
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:15,319
Speaker 1: can get sneaky because you can rewire one part of

669
00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:19,560
Speaker 1: your brain and then like move in another way to

670
00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 1: mom out and not face the real things. And mine

671
00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:25,759
Speaker 1: was like disguised by Okay, I gotta enter this or

672
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:27,239
Speaker 1: I have to eat this. Oh my gosh, I didn't

673
00:34:27,239 --> 00:34:29,480
Speaker 1: meet my goal or steps, like I'd be like, oh

674
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 1: my gosh, I'm only at nine seven steps and I'm

675
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:33,759
Speaker 1: supposed to get to ten thousand, and I would pace

676
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:38,560
Speaker 1: around my bedroom. But I'm not binging, right. But that's

677
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,920
Speaker 1: what I think is actually really I'm glad you said that,

678
00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:43,400
Speaker 1: because that's one of the reasons that I'm I'm really

679
00:34:43,440 --> 00:34:46,080
Speaker 1: really big on. If you're struggling with something like this

680
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:49,040
Speaker 1: and you're looking for help, is find somebody who has

681
00:34:49,120 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 1: experience and expertise in working in it, because not all

682
00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:55,799
Speaker 1: therapists and mental health professionals are created equal. If I

683
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:59,680
Speaker 1: didn't have experience in like the deep, deep deep woods

684
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 1: of e disorders. I might congratulate you on that and

685
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:04,920
Speaker 1: be like, I'm so proud of you. Look at you.

686
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: You're getting over this, but I don't know the inside

687
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:12,600
Speaker 1: workings of eating disorders, and they're so freaking tricky that

688
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:16,040
Speaker 1: they can have you do things that a lot of

689
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:20,160
Speaker 1: the world celebrates, and then you're celebrating it, but it's actually, again,

690
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,280
Speaker 1: not helping you get to the root of the issue,

691
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: which is the disconnection that you have with yourself and

692
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:30,040
Speaker 1: the inability to connect, which then prevents you from connecting

693
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:33,960
Speaker 1: to other people. I remember when Lisa had me stop

694
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,799
Speaker 1: doing that because I was doing her program and I

695
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:40,239
Speaker 1: had completed Brain over Venge and I had completed fork

696
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:44,319
Speaker 1: the Noise, but yet I was still sneaking in my

697
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:47,799
Speaker 1: my data. And She's like, I mean, you have to

698
00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:51,359
Speaker 1: stop because you didn't learn how to tolerate the discomfort. Yes,

699
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 1: And I told her, I can't let this go. I

700
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:56,359
Speaker 1: don't see how this is harming me, and I can't

701
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:58,480
Speaker 1: let it go. But then when I really sat back

702
00:35:58,520 --> 00:36:00,160
Speaker 1: with it, the mere fact that I couldn't let go

703
00:36:00,760 --> 00:36:05,920
Speaker 1: meant that it was harmful, and I remember struggling with

704
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:08,040
Speaker 1: sleep the first night I let it go and the

705
00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:10,360
Speaker 1: next morning waking up and sending Lisa text and I'm like,

706
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:12,359
Speaker 1: I don't know how'm gonna get through today, like not

707
00:36:12,480 --> 00:36:16,239
Speaker 1: tracking everything. And then I think I had taken a

708
00:36:16,280 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 1: picture at work and I sent it to her and

709
00:36:18,600 --> 00:36:22,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, I already feel like I look different and

710
00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:27,280
Speaker 1: she's like, Amy, you look the same, but I couldn't

711
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,879
Speaker 1: see it. So then you know this is just to say,

712
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 1: but also you're seeing how you feel and you're uncomfortable.

713
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:37,960
Speaker 1: You're having all these messages inside of your body shooting

714
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:41,320
Speaker 1: off because you have not learned how to tolerate this feeling.

715
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:44,680
Speaker 1: You're feeling all over the placing and oh my gosh,

716
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 1: scared all the stuff you're seeing an image of that,

717
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 1: and so all of a sudden you think you look different,

718
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:54,000
Speaker 1: when like it's impossible. It was impossible, literally impossible. And

719
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,560
Speaker 1: so I would just say, if you're looking to not

720
00:36:56,840 --> 00:37:00,319
Speaker 1: fall back into other behaviors, you might pick up other

721
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:05,760
Speaker 1: things that you think are safe and then you realize, oh, shoot,

722
00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 1: they're not safe either. So yeah, just make sure you

723
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:12,640
Speaker 1: have good accountability, like you're saying, cat and things in place,

724
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:15,120
Speaker 1: and it's okay to be prepared or have a list

725
00:37:15,160 --> 00:37:20,080
Speaker 1: of things, or journal and write like journaling, writing reading,

726
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: like sometimes writing things out. I think that that's if

727
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 1: you can walk away from a behavior and go and

728
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:28,960
Speaker 1: journal it all down, that can be extremely therapeutic and

729
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:33,840
Speaker 1: help you connect with your within yourself, which is ultimately

730
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 1: what you're saying is we have to do. We can't

731
00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:41,480
Speaker 1: just replace one numbing behavior with another numbing behavior and

732
00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,880
Speaker 1: then like, what are things that you say to go

733
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 1: do for this? Well? I I believe it's very important

734
00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 1: to have a box full of tools, like a box

735
00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 1: full of things, and not just one or two things

736
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,480
Speaker 1: that work, because we can't be journaling every time we

737
00:37:55,480 --> 00:37:58,399
Speaker 1: feel distressed, we can't be going for a walk every

738
00:37:58,440 --> 00:38:00,560
Speaker 1: time we feel distressed, we can't be calling a friend

739
00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:02,759
Speaker 1: every time. So having a toolbox with a lot of

740
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 1: different options, you could do a grab bag all down

741
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 1: your drawl and would get to actually make like emergency

742
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:14,359
Speaker 1: kits with clients where um, we would put a bunch

743
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:16,160
Speaker 1: of stuff in like a little bag, or they could

744
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,239
Speaker 1: get like a cute fun they could get a four

745
00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:20,520
Speaker 1: things bag or something um and put them all in

746
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 1: there and we would have things that would bring them

747
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:27,880
Speaker 1: into their senses. So a picture to look at a

748
00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: stone or something soft to hold, um, a scent to smell,

749
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,919
Speaker 1: and it's bringing you back into the present of that

750
00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 1: rather than like going in the You know, when you're

751
00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:39,800
Speaker 1: really really stressed and triggered, you're like all over the

752
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:41,360
Speaker 1: place and a lot of times living in your past.

753
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:45,080
Speaker 1: So self soothing things are really really helpful. But self

754
00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:49,240
Speaker 1: soothing doesn't take away your emotions. So something that I

755
00:38:49,280 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 1: always have in my office and I actually have it

756
00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:54,360
Speaker 1: at my house too, is I keep things in the

757
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:59,600
Speaker 1: freezer like um, citrus fruits like lemons, oranges, limes. And

758
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:04,040
Speaker 1: when you're really music were triggered to go use a behavior,

759
00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:06,839
Speaker 1: you go get that and you've hold it and your

760
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:10,120
Speaker 1: self sothent You still might be feeling scared or sad

761
00:39:10,239 --> 00:39:13,120
Speaker 1: or angry, but you're also self soothing in that moment.

762
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:16,120
Speaker 1: So I actually was going to say this because I

763
00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:18,919
Speaker 1: was watching Inside Out last night with my knees and

764
00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:23,200
Speaker 1: I don't know if you guys have seen it, but basically, sadness,

765
00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 1: the feeling sadness is a huge part of the movie.

766
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:29,799
Speaker 1: And spoiler alert if you haven't seen it, you can

767
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:33,120
Speaker 1: fast forward through this part. But at the end it

768
00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:36,319
Speaker 1: showed us that um sadness was a really important part

769
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:40,720
Speaker 1: of this girl's life and emotional literacy. And my niece

770
00:39:41,320 --> 00:39:43,920
Speaker 1: looked at me. She's seven, and she was like, wait,

771
00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:47,680
Speaker 1: because they were your feelings were categorized by different colors,

772
00:39:47,719 --> 00:39:50,439
Speaker 1: and these marbles that were categorized by different colors were

773
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:53,440
Speaker 1: being changed to have both the color for joy and

774
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:56,200
Speaker 1: both the color for sadness in it. And my niece

775
00:39:56,239 --> 00:39:58,759
Speaker 1: looked at me, and so she said, cat, why are

776
00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 1: they turning all of her happy thoughts sad? And I said, well,

777
00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:05,520
Speaker 1: look what's happening. Because there was a scene in the

778
00:40:05,520 --> 00:40:08,280
Speaker 1: movie where the girl was really sad but her parents

779
00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 1: gave her a hugging, comforted her. And I said, look

780
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 1: what's happening. She's really really sad. But because she was

781
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:17,240
Speaker 1: sad and expressed that to her family, they came to

782
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:20,200
Speaker 1: her hugged her, and now they're like spending time with her,

783
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:23,520
Speaker 1: and now she feels love and she feels joy. So

784
00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:26,520
Speaker 1: sometimes when you're sad, it's not all bad. It can

785
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:29,319
Speaker 1: lead you to something you really want. So for this

786
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 1: girl was connection with her family. And I don't know

787
00:40:33,080 --> 00:40:36,279
Speaker 1: why that's speaking me emotional night now, but I when

788
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:37,919
Speaker 1: she's asked me that. I was like, oh my gosh,

789
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:40,279
Speaker 1: I'm so grateful for this movie. But that's literally what

790
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,960
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. How can I sit in this emotion

791
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,759
Speaker 1: and sit in this feeling and not like demonize it

792
00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 1: because our discomfort is probably hitting on some kind of

793
00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:52,120
Speaker 1: emotion we're having that we don't know how to tolerate,

794
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 1: whether that's sadness or fear or anger, and we need

795
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:58,680
Speaker 1: to learn that our emotions lead us to what we

796
00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:01,759
Speaker 1: really need and what we really want, rather than lead

797
00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:04,279
Speaker 1: us to like this deep dark hole. It makes me

798
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:06,719
Speaker 1: think of Halt. It's like a little bit different, but

799
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:10,720
Speaker 1: another thing where you you might be acting or feeling

800
00:41:10,719 --> 00:41:14,719
Speaker 1: a certain way because h you might be hungry, A

801
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:17,960
Speaker 1: you might be angry, l you might be lonely, or

802
00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:21,560
Speaker 1: TEA you might be tired. And I think of how

803
00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:24,440
Speaker 1: many of the years I lived in a state of

804
00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:27,759
Speaker 1: just like I don't even have a word for it.

805
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:30,919
Speaker 1: It's just like and people wouldn't have even really known,

806
00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 1: but I was that probably because I was tired and

807
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 1: hungry and angry and lonely, like I was all. I mean,

808
00:41:39,880 --> 00:41:42,239
Speaker 1: some of those if you're like on any given day,

809
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 1: you can know if you're feeling a certain way, you

810
00:41:43,680 --> 00:41:45,600
Speaker 1: can be like, wait, am I hungry, angry, lonely, tired,

811
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,720
Speaker 1: And it's a tool for you to meet your needs.

812
00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 1: But like when I was in the thick of my

813
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:53,520
Speaker 1: eating disorder, I was halt all the time, all four things,

814
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:57,120
Speaker 1: but you never actually clued into that. So I'm just

815
00:41:57,200 --> 00:42:00,440
Speaker 1: going to so I'm not actually figuring out what do

816
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:02,719
Speaker 1: I need here? Right, But I mean, look at all

817
00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:05,799
Speaker 1: those needs and I but I wasn't meeting any of them.

818
00:42:05,800 --> 00:42:08,359
Speaker 1: I was numbing all of it out. It's like, Okay,

819
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,279
Speaker 1: I was hungry, but whatever, I Don'm not eating right now.

820
00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:13,480
Speaker 1: Or if I'm hungry, then okay, I just over eight

821
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:16,440
Speaker 1: DA and I'm angry about it all and I'm lonely

822
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:19,839
Speaker 1: because I feel it's very isolating and nobody's talking about it.

823
00:42:19,960 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 1: And then I'm freaking tired. Like so if you'redjusting a nap,

824
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 1: well yeah, but I mean it's just a cycle. It's

825
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:29,520
Speaker 1: a fish the cycle that makes you really exhausted. I

826
00:42:29,600 --> 00:42:33,919
Speaker 1: just remember being so exhausted all the times, either thinking

827
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 1: about food or not thinking about if you're trying not

828
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,840
Speaker 1: to think about food, or because running away from yourself

829
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:41,400
Speaker 1: is exhausting. I think that like running away from yourself

830
00:42:41,440 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 1: is exhausting. Even sort of recovery is exhausting. But there's

831
00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 1: a light at the end of the tunnel, and you

832
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:50,319
Speaker 1: don't have to live in that state of exhaustion forever. Right, Well, yeah,

833
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,360
Speaker 1: circling back to like where I want to put a

834
00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:55,239
Speaker 1: bow on the whole thing is is like, now I

835
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:57,920
Speaker 1: might experience multi pull of those things at once, but

836
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 1: it's very rare. I think that most my eating sort

837
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:05,640
Speaker 1: though I lived in all of them hungry, angry, lily, tired,

838
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:09,640
Speaker 1: And now I can tell I can like tell a difference.

839
00:43:09,719 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 1: If I'm actually hungry, I'm like, Okay, well that's hungry,

840
00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:15,000
Speaker 1: or if I'm snippy, I'm like, okay, do I need food?

841
00:43:15,120 --> 00:43:16,400
Speaker 1: Or is it that I'm angry? And I can like

842
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:20,759
Speaker 1: decipher what it is. Again, I might have some of

843
00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:23,759
Speaker 1: them that are crossing over, but it's rare, Like what

844
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:27,320
Speaker 1: because I'm more connected, It's like I'm able to narrow

845
00:43:27,360 --> 00:43:30,880
Speaker 1: it down and figure out what need is and then

846
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:34,239
Speaker 1: I'm able to feel my feelings and be like it's okay,

847
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:35,880
Speaker 1: and then I go and I have the day I

848
00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:40,960
Speaker 1: need to have. How many things can you say that

849
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:44,520
Speaker 1: are like catchphrases in one sentence. I don't know, but

850
00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:46,920
Speaker 1: I don't you know, I do want to offer that

851
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: hope and that light at the end of the tunnel

852
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 1: is that when you're in recovery, it's not perfect. You

853
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 1: still have days where you're angry, lonely, tired and hungry,

854
00:43:56,160 --> 00:44:00,920
Speaker 1: but like it's less exhausting because you're it's are manageable.

855
00:44:01,360 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 1: It just is. I don't know. I'm speaking for myself,

856
00:44:04,560 --> 00:44:07,040
Speaker 1: like I was a freaking hot mess, but also I

857
00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 1: was trying to hold it together all the time. And

858
00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 1: so yeah, it's just if you're there, I get it.

859
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:15,560
Speaker 1: You're not alone. I want you to know that, and

860
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:18,600
Speaker 1: I just also want people to know that it's going

861
00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:21,279
Speaker 1: to take time. It's not as easy as a lot

862
00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:24,600
Speaker 1: of the stuff you're seeing on the internet makes it look.

863
00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:27,400
Speaker 1: And it's not black and white. It's so gray. And

864
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:29,959
Speaker 1: that's why, I mean, even that's what outweighs about. It's

865
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:33,239
Speaker 1: like the gray area of eating disorders. Yeah, and there's

866
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:35,600
Speaker 1: not one way for everybody, and even some of the

867
00:44:35,600 --> 00:44:37,640
Speaker 1: stuff we're saying here, you might need to assess for

868
00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:39,680
Speaker 1: yourself what's gonna work, what's not going to work. And

869
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:41,839
Speaker 1: that's the beauty of working with someone like Cat. If

870
00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:45,359
Speaker 1: you can find a license therapist in the city where

871
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,560
Speaker 1: you live that you can actually like meet with that

872
00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:53,320
Speaker 1: specializes in eating disorders. Because I've definitely gone to therapist

873
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:56,320
Speaker 1: before that I don't know. I just didn't feel comfortable

874
00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:58,360
Speaker 1: because they didn't they didn't get it. We're talking about

875
00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:01,360
Speaker 1: like individualized treatment to and I think that's really important.

876
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:04,239
Speaker 1: Where Like I work with a lot of people with

877
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:06,879
Speaker 1: eating disorders, and I don't do the same thing with

878
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:09,840
Speaker 1: all of them because based on their experience, their life,

879
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,319
Speaker 1: their behaviors, they need different things. And that's why it's

880
00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:14,279
Speaker 1: actually really hard to answer some of the questions that

881
00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:18,040
Speaker 1: you guys send specifically about eating disorders is because there

882
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:21,239
Speaker 1: isn't one answer I can give that fits everybody. So

883
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:23,400
Speaker 1: I do want to throw that out there as we

884
00:45:23,440 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 1: wrap this up, that we were going to do three

885
00:45:28,239 --> 00:45:30,759
Speaker 1: or four. We got two questions. But that's okay. There,

886
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:34,200
Speaker 1: it was good conversation. But take what we're saying and

887
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:36,440
Speaker 1: make sure it really does fit with you before you

888
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:41,400
Speaker 1: make it like your life's motto now and your therapist

889
00:45:41,520 --> 00:45:44,920
Speaker 1: might not always be correct. So if you're with a

890
00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:47,719
Speaker 1: therapist that does you wouldn't know this, but does every

891
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:49,680
Speaker 1: single thing the same with every single client. That's a

892
00:45:49,680 --> 00:45:51,439
Speaker 1: red flag because I don't see how that would ever work.

893
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 1: I don't see how that would work either. I mean

894
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,440
Speaker 1: even as I if I have the same therapist, I

895
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:02,480
Speaker 1: want them to do different things for me in different seasons. Yeah. Yeah,

896
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:06,040
Speaker 1: like if I'm seeing them for a long time, you

897
00:46:06,080 --> 00:46:10,839
Speaker 1: need to evolved with me. Let's go. Okay, well, Pat,

898
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:14,120
Speaker 1: this is your episode. But I'm like, okay, sorry, we

899
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,200
Speaker 1: went way over. We were going to do this for

900
00:46:16,239 --> 00:46:17,880
Speaker 1: twenty minutes, but I don't know how long this is.

901
00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:20,160
Speaker 1: But it was a good conversation and I'm grateful to

902
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:22,440
Speaker 1: have it, and I'm grateful that you're somebody that is

903
00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:25,440
Speaker 1: willing to have these conversations because they are vulnerable and

904
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: hard and scary. And also look at how much goodness

905
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,279
Speaker 1: and connection you've gotten from talking about this stuff. Yeah,

906
00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:35,640
Speaker 1: it's amazing. So I hope this was helpful for all

907
00:46:35,640 --> 00:46:38,319
Speaker 1: you guys listening. If you have more questions for me,

908
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:40,960
Speaker 1: remember you can send them to Catherine at you Need

909
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:45,480
Speaker 1: Therapy podcast dot com. You can follow me at at

910
00:46:45,560 --> 00:46:48,080
Speaker 1: cat dot de fata. You can follow podcast at You

911
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:51,760
Speaker 1: Need Therapy podcast on Instagram and you can follow Amy

912
00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:55,959
Speaker 1: at Radio Amy on Instagram and make sure you listen

913
00:46:56,080 --> 00:47:00,359
Speaker 1: to if you liked this episode, her podcast Outweigh Um

914
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:04,000
Speaker 1: that's on the same network that we're on, and her

915
00:47:04,239 --> 00:47:07,160
Speaker 1: other podcast for Things with any Brown, which I get

916
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:10,319
Speaker 1: to be on once week. Yeah, Cat is the every Tuesday. Yeah,

917
00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:14,040
Speaker 1: she's the staple guest for the fifth Thing, Permanent, Permanent,

918
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,560
Speaker 1: Stable whatever. Thank you for having me, and thank you

919
00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:19,200
Speaker 1: for having these conversations, and thank you for nit a

920
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:24,920
Speaker 1: week which brings awareness to a much needed conversation. Alright, bye, guys,