1 00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:06,800 Speaker 1: It was born from my own struggles, just like many 2 00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:09,360 Speaker 1: other people. It was born from realizing that many of 3 00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:11,639 Speaker 1: the people I was coaching, as soon as they got 4 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:16,040 Speaker 1: their confidence and they believed in themselves, became completely different athletes. 5 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:18,239 Speaker 1: I mean night and day, and you know, parents would 6 00:00:18,239 --> 00:00:21,079 Speaker 1: ask me, why are they improving so quickly? It's belief 7 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:23,080 Speaker 1: and it's so key, and so I was, all right, 8 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:25,160 Speaker 1: I need to have a book that really focuses on 9 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:25,760 Speaker 1: this piece. 10 00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 2: This is the Reform Sports Project, a podcast about restoring 11 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,839 Speaker 2: healthy balance and perspective in all areas of sports through 12 00:00:32,960 --> 00:00:36,640 Speaker 2: education and advocacy. Hi, this is Nick Boncor from the 13 00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 2: Reform Sports Podcast. Today, I'm speaking with Kate Levell Wall 14 00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:44,159 Speaker 2: Street Journal bestselling author, sought after, keynote speaker, and former 15 00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 2: NCAA lacrosse coach. Kate's latest book, Superpower, was published in 16 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:52,120 Speaker 2: twenty twenty two and encourages readers to value new perspectives 17 00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:56,320 Speaker 2: and viewpoints, overcome self doubt, and unleash their authentic greatness. 18 00:00:56,520 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 2: The former vice president of leadership development for John Gordon Company, 19 00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:03,040 Speaker 2: Kate and I discussed why being unique is your Superpower, 20 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,160 Speaker 2: teaching kids to celebrate things that make them feel fulfilled 21 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,360 Speaker 2: and why coaches should always deliver feedback in a way 22 00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:14,200 Speaker 2: that builds, not breaks. I got another phenomenal guest. She 23 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:16,399 Speaker 2: wears many hats like a lot of us do, but 24 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:19,320 Speaker 2: I mean I visualize her with like ten different hats 25 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,360 Speaker 2: on her head for the amount of stuff that she does. 26 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:25,479 Speaker 2: She's an author, keynote speaker, a former college coach, sports mom, 27 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 2: just an all round badass. Super pumped to have her 28 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:30,800 Speaker 2: Kate Levell. Kate, thanks so much for hopping on. 29 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 1: Hey awesome, Thanks God doing you back well. 30 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 2: Listen. I know you've been very, very busy over the 31 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:42,000 Speaker 2: last several years, you know, creating just so much content, 32 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:44,480 Speaker 2: but also authoring a new book I believe it came 33 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:48,720 Speaker 2: out last year called Superpower, And what I love is it. 34 00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,720 Speaker 2: I really want you to get into it because you know, 35 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:53,360 Speaker 2: it's something I think a lot of us human beings 36 00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,480 Speaker 2: deal with, but particularly you know, athletes or people that 37 00:01:56,520 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 2: are trying to achieve and outperform or overperform, talk about 38 00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:04,280 Speaker 2: really overcoming self doubt. And I know for me, I 39 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:06,800 Speaker 2: deal with self doubt, you know, as a father of six, 40 00:02:06,720 --> 00:02:09,959 Speaker 2: a coach, you know, entrepreneur and all that I deal 41 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:13,280 Speaker 2: with self doubt daily sometimes for God's sakes, minute by minute, 42 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 2: you know, you're having these battles in your head. So 43 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:19,519 Speaker 2: what inspired you know you to pen this book and 44 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:21,400 Speaker 2: you know, kind of get into that for us. 45 00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, there was a couple of things that 46 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,240 Speaker 1: came through this, and I think so many people identify, 47 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:29,359 Speaker 1: you know, with what you're saying. Self doubt is something 48 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 1: that creeps in and can get us when we least 49 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:34,280 Speaker 1: expect it, get us when we need it to stay 50 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,840 Speaker 1: away the most. And you know, the idea that we 51 00:02:36,919 --> 00:02:40,360 Speaker 1: set our own limits is really hard to wrap our 52 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,760 Speaker 1: head around because it feels like there's so many things 53 00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:46,400 Speaker 1: in our way, and it's so key to just kind 54 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 1: of look and remember the things that we accomplish that 55 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:52,480 Speaker 1: we never could have imagined that we would have accomplished. 56 00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:54,639 Speaker 1: And maybe it happens right away, or maybe it's through 57 00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:57,440 Speaker 1: a whole bunch of you know, milestones that we get there. 58 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:00,520 Speaker 1: But we really are capable of so much more than 59 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:03,000 Speaker 1: what we really know. And so the book is really 60 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:06,120 Speaker 1: it was born from my own struggles just like many 61 00:03:06,160 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 1: other people. It was born from realizing that many of 62 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:12,560 Speaker 1: the people I was coaching are as soon as they 63 00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: got their confidence and they believed in themselves became completely 64 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:18,880 Speaker 1: different athletes. I mean night and day, and you know, 65 00:03:18,919 --> 00:03:21,360 Speaker 1: parents would ask me, what are you doing at practice? 66 00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:24,680 Speaker 1: You know, why are they improving so quickly? And it 67 00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:27,720 Speaker 1: was it's belief and it's so key. And so I said, 68 00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:29,360 Speaker 1: all right, I need to have a book that really 69 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:33,080 Speaker 1: focuses on this piece. And the other part of it was, 70 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:35,800 Speaker 1: you know, during COVID, I was in Minneapolis. I wasn't 71 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:39,200 Speaker 1: in sunny Florida like I am now, and I was 72 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 1: there during the George Floyd incident that was going on 73 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:44,960 Speaker 1: and the city's burning, and I mean it was just 74 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 1: insane all of the you know, there was just so 75 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:50,600 Speaker 1: much going on and a lot of heated conversations. And 76 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:54,080 Speaker 1: what I realized is we don't know how to argue anymore, 77 00:03:54,560 --> 00:04:00,080 Speaker 1: you know, like we cannot have conflicts without it destroying relationships. 78 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:03,560 Speaker 1: And you know, great relationships are born of conflict. You know, 79 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,360 Speaker 1: it is a gift to have someone else who questions 80 00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:08,400 Speaker 1: what you think and you question what they think, and 81 00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 1: being able to join those together and get a better 82 00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:16,080 Speaker 1: picture of the world. And so the story it's another fable. 83 00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:18,000 Speaker 1: I think people love to read fables. I like to 84 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:20,320 Speaker 1: read fables. They make you feel good and they make 85 00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:24,839 Speaker 1: you think. So this is a fable about avoid named Trent, 86 00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:30,640 Speaker 1: who is very sensitive. He is getting bullied about zeers 87 00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:32,680 Speaker 1: really is what he's getting bally about. So he is 88 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: he goes from school to school as his parents move around, 89 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:38,040 Speaker 1: and he finally decides, I'm never getting bullied again. I'm 90 00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:40,120 Speaker 1: gonna blend in. I'm gonna be ordinary, and that's going 91 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 1: to fix my problem. And of course he he figures 92 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,160 Speaker 1: out through the story that that does not fix anything, 93 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:49,479 Speaker 1: you know, and and he learns to embrace himself. And 94 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:52,040 Speaker 1: there's all these fun lessons along the way in really 95 00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:55,120 Speaker 1: unique characters. And there's you know, a teacher that teaches 96 00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:59,120 Speaker 1: the class how being unique is your superpower and to 97 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:02,000 Speaker 1: learn to embrace them as well as the uniqueness in others. 98 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:06,120 Speaker 1: And I introduced a word in that book, my new 99 00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:10,240 Speaker 1: favorite word, which is inimitable, which is really hard to say, 100 00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:15,800 Speaker 1: but it means so good, so unusual, that you're impossible 101 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,840 Speaker 1: to be copied. And I thought, man, that's amazing. If 102 00:05:18,839 --> 00:05:22,760 Speaker 1: you could just embrace everything that's different about yourself, I 103 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:25,559 Speaker 1: think that's really powerful. And you know, I've been talking forever, 104 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:28,599 Speaker 1: so I'll give thirty back the floor. But really, you know, 105 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:31,720 Speaker 1: the big key is that belief part and the you know, 106 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: and if you want, I can touch on the you 107 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:36,080 Speaker 1: are you a giraffe part, which is really what comes 108 00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:38,120 Speaker 1: behind how you grab that belief. 109 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,520 Speaker 2: First of all, I love when when guests start talking 110 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:44,360 Speaker 2: about things that I not only believe in but also 111 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,560 Speaker 2: I've experienced. It kind of makes the hairs on my 112 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:49,039 Speaker 2: body stand up, like, oh man, this gives me the chills. 113 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:52,320 Speaker 2: What I want to circle back to is you mentioned 114 00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:56,679 Speaker 2: the conflict right. You talked about having discussions or having 115 00:05:56,760 --> 00:06:00,560 Speaker 2: conversations that challenge you. What it may made me think 116 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:03,400 Speaker 2: of when you brought that up was a coach and 117 00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:06,080 Speaker 2: an athlete relationship. And what I'd love to ask you 118 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:09,000 Speaker 2: because you've obviously been both. You're also a parent. But 119 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:11,600 Speaker 2: I was watching March Madness I got it for a minute. 120 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:14,120 Speaker 2: I'm thinking about how, you know, I wish I could 121 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,000 Speaker 2: go back in time and be a college athlete and 122 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:20,479 Speaker 2: have the mind that I do now right, the experience 123 00:06:20,520 --> 00:06:23,120 Speaker 2: like we all do, right, the maturity to be able 124 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:25,280 Speaker 2: to take the criticism and apply it, you know, because 125 00:06:25,279 --> 00:06:27,000 Speaker 2: I have my kids and I'm dealing with that all 126 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:30,400 Speaker 2: the time, but not take that personally, you know, Like 127 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 2: I watched some of these coaches interact with their with 128 00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:35,360 Speaker 2: their athletes, and some are coaching them, you know, harder 129 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,919 Speaker 2: than others or whatever. But the kids most of the 130 00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:39,479 Speaker 2: time I see are resceptive. And it made me think, like, wow, 131 00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:41,039 Speaker 2: there are so many times I can look back and 132 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:43,160 Speaker 2: especially when I was younger, a coach would I don't 133 00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:45,159 Speaker 2: want to say, criticize me, but even just correct me 134 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,200 Speaker 2: and not in like I did something wrong with I'm 135 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 2: saying like make me a just like a part of 136 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:52,680 Speaker 2: my stance or my swing whatever on the baseball field. 137 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,720 Speaker 2: And I would take it so personally, and I was 138 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 2: I was just immature. But how do you take that 139 00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:01,040 Speaker 2: as a coach, right, which maybe I guess a conflict 140 00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:05,480 Speaker 2: and help kids understand that you're trying to help them versus, 141 00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,040 Speaker 2: you know, being critical of them. Is there a way 142 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:09,520 Speaker 2: to younger as to be able to reach it in 143 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 2: that way, in a positive way where they don't take 144 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:11,800 Speaker 2: it so personally. 145 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:14,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what there really is And it took 146 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:17,760 Speaker 1: me a long time to figure it out. But once 147 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:21,200 Speaker 1: you understand how to deliver your message, and that's you know, 148 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,400 Speaker 1: that's a big theme behind what I've been doing for 149 00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 1: a really long time, which is build not break, and 150 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:29,160 Speaker 1: to ask yourself in everything you do, is this going 151 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:30,960 Speaker 1: to build or is it going to break? Is it 152 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:33,520 Speaker 1: going to build my relationship with them, build their motivation, 153 00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:37,600 Speaker 1: their belief, their excitements, you know, build them as a 154 00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:39,440 Speaker 1: as an athlete, as a person, or is it going 155 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:43,120 Speaker 1: to break those things down? And so when you deliver feedback, 156 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:46,120 Speaker 1: it's so important that it comes from a belief standpoint 157 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,360 Speaker 1: and that the feedback is about the skill and not 158 00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:52,640 Speaker 1: the person. And there there needs to be a very 159 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,640 Speaker 1: clear distinction. So when you're talking to somebody you know, 160 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 1: and you're trying to give them a correction, you need 161 00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,960 Speaker 1: to tell them, hey, you know, you're so powerful, you're 162 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:02,160 Speaker 1: so strong in your upper body, and you think about 163 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:03,840 Speaker 1: a coach that ever said something like that to you 164 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:06,160 Speaker 1: and then gave you a correction, and you're still glowing 165 00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 1: from the praise. 166 00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,480 Speaker 2: I mean, you're you're absolutely right, yeah. 167 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:12,360 Speaker 1: Genuine honest praise when they tell you, you know, wow, you're 168 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:14,520 Speaker 1: really strong. You could you know, you could nail this 169 00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:16,280 Speaker 1: ball if you can just get your arm back a 170 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:18,360 Speaker 1: little farther I bet you're gonna rip this thing. You know, 171 00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:20,840 Speaker 1: then you're you feel like you're being given a gift. 172 00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:23,840 Speaker 1: And if it's all in a matter of phrasing, the 173 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:27,240 Speaker 1: problem comes in that, you know, as coaches were stressed, 174 00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:30,000 Speaker 1: you know, were overwhelmed. We didn't have time to plan. 175 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:32,360 Speaker 1: We've had a crazy day, you know when we're coming 176 00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 1: into this, and it's hard to have the patience to 177 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,920 Speaker 1: do that. And so I really encouraged coaches to take 178 00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 1: five minutes and transition. So you know, if it has 179 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:44,959 Speaker 1: to be sitting in the car, that's fine. If it's 180 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:47,120 Speaker 1: all the way over and you play something, you know, 181 00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:49,600 Speaker 1: that's that's going to shift your mindset. So leave the 182 00:08:49,679 --> 00:08:53,920 Speaker 1: day that you've been having and enter the practice as 183 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,160 Speaker 1: the coach that you want to be, you know, as 184 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,200 Speaker 1: the coach that your athletes need you to be. Set 185 00:08:58,240 --> 00:09:02,120 Speaker 1: your intentions no matter what happens in this practice today. 186 00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:04,640 Speaker 1: If you know, the fields are muddy, if half the 187 00:09:04,679 --> 00:09:06,760 Speaker 1: team is sick or can't make it, or if they're 188 00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:10,400 Speaker 1: just not having a great practice day, if I accomplish 189 00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:15,040 Speaker 1: these three things, I will consider this practice a success today. 190 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,200 Speaker 1: And if I feel like it's a success and it's 191 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:21,439 Speaker 1: things that I can control, then I am going to 192 00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:24,760 Speaker 1: be in a better mindset to coach and to lead. 193 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,480 Speaker 1: So part of it's get your head straight and the 194 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:30,000 Speaker 1: other part is make sure your delivery is really on point. 195 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,720 Speaker 1: You know, my three questions that I asked before giving 196 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:36,719 Speaker 1: feedback is one is it true? Two? Do they need 197 00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: to hear it? And that's typically where most people stop, 198 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:42,480 Speaker 1: and then they just unleash, which is terrifying because usually 199 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:43,800 Speaker 1: it is true and they do need to hear it. 200 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 1: But the third is the way that I'm delivering it. 201 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:49,480 Speaker 1: Is it going to build or break? And when you 202 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,400 Speaker 1: have those three things, they feel like you build confidence 203 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 1: in your athletes. And you know, the coach confident athletes 204 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 1: who want to learn, who aren't hesitating, who jump in, 205 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:01,040 Speaker 1: will always want to be first in line and can't 206 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:03,680 Speaker 1: wait to go and work hard. You know, we want that, 207 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: So anything we can do to to make that happen 208 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,600 Speaker 1: should be, you know, first on your list. 209 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:12,800 Speaker 2: As you're talking, I start thinking back on my own experience. 210 00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:16,160 Speaker 2: But I I you know, you talk about unlocking your 211 00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:20,160 Speaker 2: potential or people always say trust the process. You know 212 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:22,880 Speaker 2: I say it too. We got to trust the process. Well, 213 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:26,480 Speaker 2: part of the growth and developmental process and anything, whether 214 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,560 Speaker 2: it's through athletics or just being a parent trying to 215 00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:31,240 Speaker 2: help your kids, you know, become the best citizens they 216 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:35,400 Speaker 2: can be. There's gonna be failure along the way. And 217 00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:38,600 Speaker 2: what I find, and I look back on my own experiences, 218 00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:43,280 Speaker 2: I took failures so hard when I was younger, you know, 219 00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:45,439 Speaker 2: when I was in my especially in my teenage years. 220 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:48,160 Speaker 2: You know, especially if you're one of the better athletes 221 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 2: as a kid, usually you're like on every team, you're 222 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,440 Speaker 2: like one of the best, right so so failures are 223 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:55,120 Speaker 2: almost few and far between. It's only when the intensity 224 00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:58,040 Speaker 2: and competition raises and you're around better athletes that are 225 00:10:58,080 --> 00:11:00,800 Speaker 2: more like you, where you start really being challenged. But 226 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:05,360 Speaker 2: trusting the process also means understanding that part of getting 227 00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:09,800 Speaker 2: better means failing and struggling. What's the best way to 228 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:13,320 Speaker 2: help let's say teenage or even younger, let's say ten, eleven, twelve, 229 00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 2: thirteen year old kids who are coming into that time 230 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 2: where they're starting to be you know, let's say your 231 00:11:18,440 --> 00:11:20,800 Speaker 2: kid is a I'm used wrestling for an example, because 232 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:23,720 Speaker 2: my older boys wrestle. You know, they're they're in local 233 00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,640 Speaker 2: tournaments and they're dominating. But then we start traveling to 234 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:28,960 Speaker 2: more regional or whatever, where the intensive level picks up 235 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:32,080 Speaker 2: and they're being pushed more. And then they're shocked, right like, 236 00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:34,200 Speaker 2: oh my god, I just got my tail kicked, Like 237 00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:37,040 Speaker 2: what did this come from? Like how do you help 238 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:37,760 Speaker 2: them understand? 239 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:38,439 Speaker 1: Like this is. 240 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:41,560 Speaker 2: Part of it? Is it all just delivery or do 241 00:11:41,679 --> 00:11:43,520 Speaker 2: sometimes you just got to got to get thrown in 242 00:11:43,559 --> 00:11:45,520 Speaker 2: the fire and kind of figure things out. 243 00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,439 Speaker 1: Yeah, And you know it's funny. I mean, kids really 244 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:51,880 Speaker 1: are learning everything from us. And I spent a lot 245 00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:54,559 Speaker 1: of my time when I first started writing about sports, 246 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,760 Speaker 1: and it really was driven by my own kids. You know, 247 00:11:57,840 --> 00:11:59,960 Speaker 1: That's where I got super interested and how do I 248 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,920 Speaker 1: do this? And so I started just going to the 249 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 1: park and this might sound creepy, but I was observing 250 00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:09,120 Speaker 1: coaches and taking notes and I was watching the kids' 251 00:12:09,120 --> 00:12:11,480 Speaker 1: faces and I was seeing what came of it, and 252 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:15,240 Speaker 1: it was just really fascinating. You know, what we celebrate, 253 00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:19,520 Speaker 1: they celebrate, and it's it's unbelievable, or maybe not unbelievable, 254 00:12:19,559 --> 00:12:22,800 Speaker 1: how often we are inconsistent and we're in a conflict 255 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 1: with ourselves. So we're telling them, you know, I celebrate effort. 256 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:30,120 Speaker 1: I celebrate you know, you trying something even if you fail. 257 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,640 Speaker 1: And you know, we say all the right things, but 258 00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:34,760 Speaker 1: what are we handing out of works for? What are 259 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,480 Speaker 1: we at the end of the game. Who are we 260 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:38,559 Speaker 1: giving that ball to? Who? You know, who are we 261 00:12:38,679 --> 00:12:42,160 Speaker 1: calling out? It's the person who gets the stats, who 262 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:45,240 Speaker 1: gets the points. So we're saying this one thing is important, 263 00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:49,480 Speaker 1: but we're actually celebrating something else. And so when they 264 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:53,360 Speaker 1: look at failure, they're looking at I'm not accomplishing the 265 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:56,240 Speaker 1: things that my coach celebrates. They're not listening to what 266 00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:58,040 Speaker 1: you say. They're listening to you know, they're watching what 267 00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:01,040 Speaker 1: you do. And if you switch that around, especially this, 268 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:04,720 Speaker 1: you know for the younger kids, and you start handing 269 00:13:04,720 --> 00:13:07,480 Speaker 1: out you know, the ball to the person who put 270 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:10,240 Speaker 1: the best effort forward, or the teammate that was encouraging 271 00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:12,440 Speaker 1: somebody on the sideline, or that you know, the person 272 00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:14,960 Speaker 1: that wanted to be first, or you know whatever. That is, 273 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:16,960 Speaker 1: a person who set up someone else to make a 274 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:21,080 Speaker 1: great play. When you celebrate that, that's what they try 275 00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:23,960 Speaker 1: to do. And those are controllables. Those are ways that 276 00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,920 Speaker 1: they can feel empowered and then when they don't, you know, 277 00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:29,160 Speaker 1: get that goal or get whatever it is that they're 278 00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:32,200 Speaker 1: that they're trying to achieve. It's just something that they 279 00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:35,800 Speaker 1: are continuing to try for. You know, just like a 280 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:37,960 Speaker 1: kid who's learning how to walk. You know, they don't 281 00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:39,840 Speaker 1: sit on the ground and cry and say, well that's it, 282 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,960 Speaker 1: I'm not trying to walk anymore. They just they they're 283 00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:44,920 Speaker 1: going to keep going until they master it. And so 284 00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:47,720 Speaker 1: we need to make those skills be something that hey, 285 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:50,600 Speaker 1: this is just something that I'm shooting for. But the controllables, 286 00:13:50,640 --> 00:13:52,640 Speaker 1: those are the ones that I'm going to get rewarded for. 287 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:57,040 Speaker 1: And then we're teaching them to celebrate things that make 288 00:13:57,120 --> 00:13:59,560 Speaker 1: them feel fulfilled. It's kind of like getting back to 289 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:04,320 Speaker 1: that of a job well done, because we're celebrating, you know, 290 00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:05,440 Speaker 1: the work that they put in. 291 00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,320 Speaker 2: When we come back, Kate and I discussed why failure 292 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:18,200 Speaker 2: is feedback and not a stopping point. Welcome back where 293 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:20,040 Speaker 2: we left off. Kate and I were about to talk 294 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:24,000 Speaker 2: about redefining failure and empowering athletes to become an active 295 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:27,760 Speaker 2: team contributor. So there is a you know, there's a 296 00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:32,160 Speaker 2: juggling act because let's face it, I mean, there are winners, 297 00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:36,040 Speaker 2: there are losers. Right, you know, right, But you know, 298 00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,480 Speaker 2: I always find it funny because I'm a big advocate 299 00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:41,400 Speaker 2: for you know, people say participation. I'm thinking, like I 300 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:44,160 Speaker 2: got trophies when I was like seven. I think there's 301 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,680 Speaker 2: age appropriate stuff. But make no mistake about it, Like 302 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:50,120 Speaker 2: I have all the audience. You know, if you unless 303 00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,880 Speaker 2: your first time listener knows that I have six kids 304 00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 2: and old this is going to be eighteen. The youngest 305 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:56,880 Speaker 2: is four and a half, so I mean, it's insane. 306 00:14:56,880 --> 00:15:00,640 Speaker 2: But the point is the my and a half year 307 00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:03,160 Speaker 2: old who's really now you know, he's really getting into 308 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:05,640 Speaker 2: you know, youth sports and playing everything and all of that. 309 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:08,360 Speaker 2: And from the time he's been like five or six, 310 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,160 Speaker 2: even though they don't really keep quote unquote score, like 311 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:12,520 Speaker 2: all the kids know the score. 312 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, they know the score. But let me let me 313 00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,280 Speaker 1: just back up, because I have been I want to 314 00:15:17,280 --> 00:15:19,440 Speaker 1: say accused because it sounds it sounds rough, but it's 315 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:23,400 Speaker 1: true because people will straight up accuse you, accused of 316 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:26,440 Speaker 1: the trophy culture. And I will tell you that I am, 317 00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:30,320 Speaker 1: first of all, I am obsessed with winning. I don't 318 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,840 Speaker 1: like losing, and I will never walk on to a 319 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:36,160 Speaker 1: field of court whatever. And I mean I'm so competitive 320 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:37,560 Speaker 1: that I tell people, if I'm sitting next to you 321 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:39,800 Speaker 1: at lunch, I'm probably competing with you in some way. 322 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:42,680 Speaker 1: And that's just the truth. That's just the way that 323 00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:46,280 Speaker 1: I function, and it's what drives me. But I believe 324 00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:51,400 Speaker 1: that if you celebrate the things that create winners, they 325 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:53,400 Speaker 1: will win. You know. It's the same as if you're 326 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,560 Speaker 1: in a business and you start pouring into your people 327 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:00,600 Speaker 1: and you know, you start getting them to love putting 328 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,640 Speaker 1: in the work and collaborating and getting things done and 329 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:06,360 Speaker 1: celebrating the small things on the way, it takes care 330 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,320 Speaker 1: of the scoreboard. All we're doing here is we're not 331 00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:10,560 Speaker 1: saying we're not striving to win. We're just saying that 332 00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:15,040 Speaker 1: what we're focusing on are the behaviors that create winning teams. 333 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:18,640 Speaker 1: And so now you're winning, you know, both as someone 334 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:21,360 Speaker 1: who is getting skill and who loves it and wants 335 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:24,600 Speaker 1: to keep pursuing it, but we're also winning and that 336 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,360 Speaker 1: we feel like we can really bond as a team 337 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,640 Speaker 1: and develop habits that are going to last for a lifetime. 338 00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 1: And so it's really a matter of you know, focusing 339 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:37,200 Speaker 1: on those things. But it's not taking away from the 340 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,160 Speaker 1: win at all, and I guarantee you you know that's 341 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,240 Speaker 1: I've never sat there and said, well, I don't really 342 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:45,560 Speaker 1: care if we if we win. You know, that's definitely 343 00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:47,400 Speaker 1: out in the forefront. You're still putting your best players 344 00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:49,520 Speaker 1: and you're still doing whatever is that your philosophy is. 345 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,120 Speaker 1: I think that's really key as far as the failure goes, though. 346 00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:57,440 Speaker 1: It's really important that they see failure as you know, 347 00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 1: just redefined and it has to be talked about all 348 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,400 Speaker 1: the time because you know you're getting a definition from 349 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:04,680 Speaker 1: all over the place. But you know, for us here 350 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:07,560 Speaker 1: and to move forward, we have to learn that failure 351 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:11,480 Speaker 1: is not a stopping point. It's feedback. It's telling us 352 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:13,359 Speaker 1: what do we need to pivot, what do we need 353 00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:15,880 Speaker 1: to work harder on? That's all it is. It's feedback. 354 00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:18,240 Speaker 1: And the only real failure, of course, is when we 355 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:20,640 Speaker 1: stop trying or when we quit. And so they need 356 00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:23,320 Speaker 1: to know the difference between failure and quitting, and it's 357 00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:24,280 Speaker 1: a very big difference. 358 00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:27,200 Speaker 2: I love that to go back to the delivery piece 359 00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:30,359 Speaker 2: of it, and you're you're absolutely right. Like now again, 360 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,280 Speaker 2: if I keep telling my kids, you know, it's just 361 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:34,920 Speaker 2: funny because my son, who I was mentioning before Roko, 362 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:36,919 Speaker 2: who's eight and a half. He's in third grade, and 363 00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:40,560 Speaker 2: if I keep telling them it's okay to lose and YadA, YadA, YadA, 364 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,919 Speaker 2: he's in eventually like that I want to win, like 365 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,399 Speaker 2: and that's okay. However, it's the vibe that I give up. Like, 366 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,119 Speaker 2: I think there's a healthy way, And this is what 367 00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:51,520 Speaker 2: I would love to know from your experiences. What are 368 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:55,440 Speaker 2: the healthy and age Because listen, there is an age 369 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:59,640 Speaker 2: appropriate way to compete. I think at all levels, like 370 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,360 Speaker 2: when you get to high school, Like, I think it's 371 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 2: okay that we're trying to win all the time and 372 00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:07,399 Speaker 2: playing time is awarded to those that are going to 373 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:09,720 Speaker 2: give us the best chance to win. I mean that 374 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,199 Speaker 2: to me is a noebrainer. Some people will argue that, 375 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:14,919 Speaker 2: and I'm like, listen, maybe you never played competitive sports. 376 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:20,600 Speaker 2: But below that middle school ages and younger, I think winning, 377 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:23,400 Speaker 2: of course, or competing learning how to compete to win 378 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:27,320 Speaker 2: is valuable. But I also think that from a coaching standpoint, 379 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:31,439 Speaker 2: we should never sacrifice the development of the child or 380 00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:34,680 Speaker 2: the athlete or the kid for the sake of trying 381 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,400 Speaker 2: to win a game. And that means holding a kid 382 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:40,000 Speaker 2: at one position because you know, because it's going to 383 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,720 Speaker 2: give us the best odds. Whereas we stick one kid 384 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:44,199 Speaker 2: in right field because that's what position everyone says is 385 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,560 Speaker 2: the worst in the baseball field at like nine or whatever, 386 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,480 Speaker 2: and because they may not be the most developed. What 387 00:18:49,560 --> 00:18:52,440 Speaker 2: are the ages in which you have experienced on where 388 00:18:52,440 --> 00:18:56,080 Speaker 2: you think it's like age appropriate competition where the focus 389 00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 2: is on, you know, winning versus you know, just going 390 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:00,160 Speaker 2: out and having a good. 391 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:04,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, it's almost split into two parts for me, 392 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,040 Speaker 1: because honestly, if you put me out there with five 393 00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:10,560 Speaker 1: year olds, we're still trying to win. I promise you, like, 394 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:12,359 Speaker 1: that's what we're going for. And I know that I 395 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:14,520 Speaker 1: may not sound great for some parents, but I always 396 00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:18,240 Speaker 1: want to win. The point of competing is to create 397 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,240 Speaker 1: a winner, and it's to try to come out on top. 398 00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:23,760 Speaker 1: But you're not competing if you're both just trying to like, 399 00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:26,919 Speaker 1: you know, if you're volleying, that's a worm up. You know, 400 00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:28,720 Speaker 1: like we're playing a game. Let's make this a game. 401 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:32,160 Speaker 1: Let's teach on this is competition. Competition is hard, it's challenging. 402 00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:35,120 Speaker 1: It's supposed to be fun to be challenged. So number 403 00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:37,880 Speaker 1: one is if you're not making this fun. You are 404 00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:41,840 Speaker 1: teaching them already to think negatively about the competition, which 405 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:45,680 Speaker 1: creates a whole lifelong of stress. Right, competing is fun. 406 00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:49,560 Speaker 1: You should celebrate it. If you lose, your reaction to 407 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,399 Speaker 1: losing should be to turn it around and move forward. 408 00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,479 Speaker 1: But you're never before the loss going it's okay if 409 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,640 Speaker 1: we lose, guys, let's just have a good time. You're 410 00:19:56,680 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 1: still going, Let's do the best we can. Let's leave 411 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:02,320 Speaker 1: everything out there, let' really push ourselves. But my challenge 412 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:05,679 Speaker 1: for coaches is at certain ages, really at all ages, 413 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:09,240 Speaker 1: but especially at the younger ages, your job is to 414 00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:11,240 Speaker 1: take what is in front of you because we're all 415 00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:12,800 Speaker 1: you know, not many of us get to go out 416 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,879 Speaker 1: there with the big budget and recruit right for our 417 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:17,919 Speaker 1: ten year olds, whatever they're doing. Your job is to 418 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:20,959 Speaker 1: take what's in front of you, find a role for 419 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:24,000 Speaker 1: everybody on the team, and encourage them in that role 420 00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:27,840 Speaker 1: and give them an opportunity to contribute. You know, that's 421 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:31,240 Speaker 1: the key. Everyone should feel like a contributor. It shouldn't 422 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 1: be hey, you're not ready to contribute, because that makes 423 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,359 Speaker 1: you feel like you're not a part of it. So 424 00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:38,480 Speaker 1: it's challenging. But there's going to be a kid who 425 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:40,960 Speaker 1: it feels like they can't do anything. I mean, I've 426 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:44,800 Speaker 1: had athletes who on offense, you know, when we're playing 427 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,439 Speaker 1: a lacrosse game, playing soccer or something, No, they have 428 00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:51,040 Speaker 1: no six skills, no ball handling skills, and so their 429 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:55,000 Speaker 1: job is to become the person right next to the 430 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 1: person with the ball, and they're the first cut to 431 00:20:57,359 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 1: make a hole so that you know, the person driving 432 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,840 Speaker 1: can get to the net. And that's their goal, and 433 00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:06,160 Speaker 1: we encourage them to be really good at it. And 434 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:08,800 Speaker 1: you know, we let people try all of the positions 435 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:11,520 Speaker 1: and you know, learn about all the positions because that's 436 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:14,440 Speaker 1: part of development. But when we're competing and we need 437 00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: to get a goal, they have a contribution that we 438 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,080 Speaker 1: get to celebrate later. I have a place that I 439 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:22,520 Speaker 1: can put them that they've worked on. But I'm clarifying, 440 00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:24,440 Speaker 1: you know, I still they're still trying all the positions, 441 00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:25,960 Speaker 1: they're still doing all that. But hey, we need a 442 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:27,919 Speaker 1: quick goal. Let's go into that setup, and you're so 443 00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:30,399 Speaker 1: good at punching that first hole. That's what your job's 444 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:32,480 Speaker 1: going to be. Everyone should be able to celebrate. 445 00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:37,320 Speaker 2: On the other side, I freaking love that, like, find 446 00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:40,000 Speaker 2: a way for each person to be a contributor, because 447 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,960 Speaker 2: at the end of the day, that's how you feel 448 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,160 Speaker 2: a part of a team. And especially when you're dealing 449 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:47,040 Speaker 2: with young kids. To your point, you know, you may 450 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 2: have a kid on your team who was a quote 451 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:50,480 Speaker 2: unquote All star and then you may have a kids 452 00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 2: heads are her first time playing that sport, so there's 453 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:56,159 Speaker 2: a massive difference. But you can I always kind of say, like, 454 00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:59,960 Speaker 2: don't judge me, you know by how our win loss record, 455 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:01,720 Speaker 2: as if I'm coaching nine year old judge me by 456 00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:03,920 Speaker 2: how that kid who's its first time has her first 457 00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:06,560 Speaker 2: time playing the sport, and see how their growth is. 458 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,760 Speaker 2: That's how I judge myself throughout the season, like did 459 00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,280 Speaker 2: each person get better? And I think when you break 460 00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:15,439 Speaker 2: it down from how can I help this person be 461 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,119 Speaker 2: a contributor? Man, that's powerful stuff. 462 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:20,119 Speaker 1: You know, take a look at practice because you know 463 00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 1: you touched on something really important. And as someone who 464 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:26,840 Speaker 1: coached a sport in developing areas, a huge challenge that 465 00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:29,359 Speaker 1: I would have was we'd have these kids that played 466 00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:31,560 Speaker 1: all year long and knew the sport up and down 467 00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:33,679 Speaker 1: and had great stick work playing with kids who it 468 00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,280 Speaker 1: was literally their first day. Yeah, and how do you 469 00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:39,359 Speaker 1: run a drill with that, because you know, especially when 470 00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:41,360 Speaker 1: you're you know, hey, we're going into competition in a week. 471 00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:44,200 Speaker 1: I had first time players. I had first time players 472 00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,680 Speaker 1: on division to college team. That was interesting. I had 473 00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:49,399 Speaker 1: first time players, you know, in high school playing varsity 474 00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:51,040 Speaker 1: and we had a game the next week. And so 475 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:53,919 Speaker 1: I can't say, well, I guess you can't do any 476 00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,680 Speaker 1: of these drills because typically we're doing a shooting drill. 477 00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,159 Speaker 1: You're going to receive a pass and then you're going 478 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:02,280 Speaker 1: to shoot. Well, if you can't catch yet, then what 479 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:03,919 Speaker 1: do you do? I guess, you know, you start with 480 00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:06,440 Speaker 1: the ball like it's not realistic. You know, they're kind 481 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:08,600 Speaker 1: of feel like useless in the drill. So I started 482 00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:12,479 Speaker 1: institsutting high low, so before they started, the person passing 483 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:16,080 Speaker 1: the ball would wait until they would tell them point 484 00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:17,960 Speaker 1: up or down. And that just meant I'd like to 485 00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:19,400 Speaker 1: receive it in the air. I'd like you to roll 486 00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:21,040 Speaker 1: it to me. And so if they don't know how 487 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:22,800 Speaker 1: to catch yet, they would pick up the ground ball 488 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:24,720 Speaker 1: and they would shoot. But they were still participating in 489 00:23:24,760 --> 00:23:28,240 Speaker 1: the drill. They were still working on the main aspect, 490 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,159 Speaker 1: which was shooting, but they were also getting the added 491 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,800 Speaker 1: benefit of asking for the ball and being able to 492 00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:36,439 Speaker 1: pick it up themselves. So adjusting a drill in a 493 00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:39,200 Speaker 1: way where everybody can do the objective but it's fits 494 00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:41,800 Speaker 1: to their level is really really key. Nobody wants to 495 00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,400 Speaker 1: sit out of practice or feel like I'm not good 496 00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:43,879 Speaker 1: enough for this. 497 00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,960 Speaker 2: I love it. Coach Novell, I know that you do 498 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,879 Speaker 2: keynote speaking, You're a v I mean, you do a 499 00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:52,399 Speaker 2: ton of work. Where can people find you? You know, 500 00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:53,920 Speaker 2: let us know, because I know there's a lot of 501 00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:55,280 Speaker 2: people that are going to want to follow up and 502 00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,679 Speaker 2: connect with you. Where can they find you? 503 00:23:57,240 --> 00:24:00,679 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, my email or actually give me my website 504 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,760 Speaker 1: the easiest way, so just Kateleavell dot com. And it's 505 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:05,840 Speaker 1: really easy to remember my last name because it's like 506 00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,800 Speaker 1: leave with two l's on the end, like get out 507 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,639 Speaker 1: of here. So yeah, that's probably the easiest way. Shoot 508 00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:15,040 Speaker 1: me an email. And I love coming out and talking 509 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 1: to teams, talking to coaches, associations. I worked with a 510 00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:20,720 Speaker 1: lot of universities and a lot of athletes as well 511 00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:22,840 Speaker 1: in the new workshops with them, so they're really fun. 512 00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:26,119 Speaker 2: Definitely connect with Kate. She is a wealth of knowledge. 513 00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,000 Speaker 2: She has seen it from every aspect that she said, 514 00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:32,640 Speaker 2: as a college coach, sports parent, author, everything in between. Coach, 515 00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 2: I cannot thank you enough for coming on. This has 516 00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:36,960 Speaker 2: been freaking awesome. We'll follow up again, but thanks for 517 00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:39,480 Speaker 2: coming on and sharing your passion. It's obvious it comes 518 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:40,920 Speaker 2: through and there's a lot of gold in there. 519 00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:42,640 Speaker 1: Awesome, very cool. Thank you so much. 520 00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:47,080 Speaker 2: That's Kate Levell, best selling author, consoling and keynote speaker. 521 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:50,200 Speaker 2: Thanks for listening to the Reform Sports Project podcast. I'm 522 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:52,560 Speaker 2: Nick Bonacort and our goal is to restore a healthy 523 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,880 Speaker 2: balance and perspective in all areas of sports through education 524 00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 2: and advocacy. For updates, please follow us on Facebook, Twitter, 525 00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:02,439 Speaker 2: and Instagram, or check out our website by searching for 526 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:03,840 Speaker 2: the Reform Sports Project.