WEBVTT - The Lousy Lumberjack

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<v Speaker 1>Don't answer the phone. Elvis Duran, Elvis Duran's phone tap.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, Scary, what's your phone tap all about?

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<v Speaker 2>Today?

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<v Speaker 3>So Tracy wants to play a phone tap on her

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<v Speaker 3>husband j R. Now he's obsessed over his Ford pickup truck. Meanwhile,

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<v Speaker 3>their neighbor has this huge tree that was scheduled to

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<v Speaker 3>be cut down. So she wanted me to use these

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<v Speaker 3>two ideas to mess with him. So I'm gonna pretend

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<v Speaker 3>to be the tree removal guy with bad aim, the

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<v Speaker 3>tree removal guy with bad aim.

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<v Speaker 1>It could happen. Let's see what happens in Scary's phone tap.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's listen.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello, Hey, we got some problems. The breaking guy behind

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<v Speaker 2>us was cutting down that big maple and it fell

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<v Speaker 2>on the truck. Day are being so on my truck?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, go get the goods the cops. The guy's leaving,

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<v Speaker 2>maybe's leaving. Where are you going?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm just going out for a lunch break.

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<v Speaker 2>What are you gonna do about the tree on his truck?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. It's not really my fault.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess fault. Put him on the fold. Do you

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<v Speaker 2>want to talk to my hands? And my husband said

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<v Speaker 2>he put him on the phone right now.

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<v Speaker 1>I am hey, hey, yeah, what do you mean?

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<v Speaker 2>It's about your fault? The tree fall on my truck.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry, sir. We tried to notch it in a

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<v Speaker 1>certain direction.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry, sir. I want your insurance information, your carrier,

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<v Speaker 2>I want everything.

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<v Speaker 1>Is there anyway I could come back a little later,

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<v Speaker 1>like two hours.

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<v Speaker 2>Or something like that, but you know you're not coming

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<v Speaker 2>back later tomorrow. We're gonna take care of us.

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<v Speaker 1>Right now, sir. I'm sorry your car was in the way.

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<v Speaker 2>My car wasn't in the way. I'm on my own property.

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<v Speaker 4>Clearly, there was a tree to be knocked down today,

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<v Speaker 4>and who knew which way it was going to fall?

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<v Speaker 2>It's in my property, you douche bag.

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<v Speaker 4>Well you just saw him through that thing, and I

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<v Speaker 4>was notching it and I thought it was going to

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<v Speaker 4>go one way and it ended up going the other.

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<v Speaker 4>And I'm sorry about that. The whole back of your

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<v Speaker 4>truck is a little bent in. Maybe I could hammer

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<v Speaker 4>it out a little bit.

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<v Speaker 1>But how old is this truck? In a way? How

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<v Speaker 1>is this thing not no more? It's not. It's got

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit of a dent, and I'm sorry about that,

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<v Speaker 1>but I'll tell you.

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<v Speaker 4>What can I give you, like fifty dollars for the

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<v Speaker 4>truck or something like that.

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<v Speaker 2>Boobile.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, we're a new company and my insurance don't kick

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<v Speaker 4>in till another sixty days.

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<v Speaker 1>So I don't know if I'm going to be able

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<v Speaker 1>to pay you for any of this. Sorry about that.

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<v Speaker 2>Put my life on the phone right now.

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<v Speaker 1>He wants to talk to you. Hold on his.

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<v Speaker 2>Hair, Hello, Dracy, get his plate number.

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<v Speaker 1>Listen. I don't want to deal with this right now.

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<v Speaker 2>Leave not this guy, leave the lyrics. You get the

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<v Speaker 2>cops here. I cannot leave until the costs comes.

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<v Speaker 1>Listen. I'm gonna get out of hair, okay, because I.

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<v Speaker 4>Don't know you're not leaving you bitch.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm a waiting and I'll let it go nowhere, and

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<v Speaker 2>you tell him what he said to you.

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<v Speaker 1>On let me talk to him.

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<v Speaker 2>Hold on, he want to talk to I don't want

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<v Speaker 2>him on there, Tracy, get him off.

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<v Speaker 1>The phone, Sir.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't believe it.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't mean to call your wife that. It was

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<v Speaker 1>the heat of the moment.

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<v Speaker 2>You don't know who you're dealing with. Believe me. What's

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<v Speaker 2>my wife's back on the phone now, Listen.

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<v Speaker 4>I just really didn't dare think that this was going

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<v Speaker 4>to be a bad day, but it's turning out that way.

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<v Speaker 4>Now I can make it up to you, uh without

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<v Speaker 4>paying you.

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<v Speaker 2>Money on the phone. Hey, he's uninsured, he's illiterate. Moron.

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<v Speaker 2>Where are the cops when he's talking like this? They're

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<v Speaker 2>in the car trying to look at his information, dick.

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<v Speaker 4>Cops not going to do anything to me, because I

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<v Speaker 4>know everybody from here to eternity.

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<v Speaker 2>I can't to go and walk over by the cop

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<v Speaker 2>cars to tell him the way he's talking to you.

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<v Speaker 2>Will you please, now, moron, get over there to talk

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<v Speaker 2>to them cops and I'm getting nervous. Over to the

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<v Speaker 2>policeman and tell them just get away from you. Do

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<v Speaker 2>not put him back on your phone, Tracy, Lady.

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<v Speaker 1>Where are you're going?

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<v Speaker 3>Where you bring me?

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<v Speaker 2>Tracy, go over by that and tell him the way

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<v Speaker 2>he's talking to you. I heard it on the phone.

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<v Speaker 1>You know you didn't hear anything?

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<v Speaker 3>Man?

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<v Speaker 1>You know what you heard?

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<v Speaker 2>Well? My wife on the phone, douche shrag.

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<v Speaker 1>You heard a phone tap.

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<v Speaker 3>It's scary Jones from Elvis Duran and The Morning Show.

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<v Speaker 3>How you doing, buddy?

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<v Speaker 2>You better buy about a keg of beer for this one.

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<v Speaker 2>I got news story. Brothers, you're gonna have to bleep out.

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<v Speaker 1>On that radio Elvis Duran's phone tap.

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<v Speaker 3>This phone tab was pre recorded with permission granted by

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<v Speaker 3>all participace the Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis

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<v Speaker 3>Duran in the Morning Show