1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:05,480
Speaker 1: This is John, this is them, Okay Storytime podcast hosts,

2
00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:09,840
Speaker 1: and we have some good story is coming up for you.

3
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:12,160
Speaker 1: That's right. But before that, we have a little morsel

4
00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:14,280
Speaker 1: of a two minute outbreak from the sponsors, keeping the

5
00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:15,360
Speaker 1: show delicious.

6
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:20,840
Speaker 2: I forbid my husband to be at my birth. He

7
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:23,000
Speaker 2: prioritizes his mother over me.

8
00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:27,120
Speaker 3: WHOA what he shouldn't. He doesn't deserve to be there

9
00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:28,000
Speaker 3: if he doesn't want to.

10
00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:31,960
Speaker 2: I just love that this reads like she's talking about

11
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:32,640
Speaker 2: her own birth.

12
00:00:33,680 --> 00:00:35,640
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, she was born.

13
00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:38,360
Speaker 2: I am due to give birth to my second child

14
00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:41,080
Speaker 2: any day now. I'm a little worried that all my

15
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,559
Speaker 2: emotions from today may send me into labor. Not ideal

16
00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:47,320
Speaker 2: my partner. I use that word loosely because I'm not

17
00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:50,320
Speaker 2: really sure if I want him to be that has

18
00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:55,440
Speaker 2: a self absorbed and harmful mother. By the way, this

19
00:00:55,480 --> 00:00:58,280
Speaker 2: comes from a user Nice Outcome twenty two thirty seven,

20
00:00:58,480 --> 00:00:59,920
Speaker 2: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

21
00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:00,680
Speaker 2: the r slash.

22
00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:05,080
Speaker 1: Okay, Storytime subpured it. So. She is a vile woman.

23
00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:09,480
Speaker 2: She tormented me during my first pregnancy and postpartum. My

24
00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:12,320
Speaker 2: partner cut her off then, and for the most part,

25
00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:15,840
Speaker 2: I had peace. She has slowly been worming her way

26
00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:18,760
Speaker 2: back into our lives. Though I never hated her until

27
00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,720
Speaker 2: she made me feel like I was less than a

28
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:26,000
Speaker 2: human fair My partner is overly defensive about her, partially

29
00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:28,760
Speaker 2: because he is in denial about the emotional abuse and

30
00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,280
Speaker 2: neglect he experienced growing up. She is the cause of

31
00:01:32,319 --> 00:01:35,120
Speaker 2: a lot of our disagreements. I just found out that

32
00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:39,280
Speaker 2: my partner has been deliberately withholding information from me. One

33
00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:41,520
Speaker 2: of the major factors that led me to resenting his

34
00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,480
Speaker 2: mother was the fact that she turned up at the

35
00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:47,360
Speaker 2: hospital after I had given birth. She made her way

36
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,200
Speaker 2: to my ward and into my room, knowing it was

37
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:53,200
Speaker 2: against my wishes to have any visitors. She had argued

38
00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:56,760
Speaker 2: with me about it for months. It turns out he

39
00:01:56,880 --> 00:02:02,280
Speaker 2: knew she was coming. No Ah, he knew and didn't

40
00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:05,680
Speaker 2: say anything. He told me less than an hour ago.

41
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:09,400
Speaker 2: I am so hurt by him. I feel betrayed. My

42
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,560
Speaker 2: family were incredibly angry with me because they thought I

43
00:02:12,639 --> 00:02:16,320
Speaker 2: prioritized my in laws over them. They had been told

44
00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:19,040
Speaker 2: I didn't want visitors and were happy to respect my wishes.

45
00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:22,639
Speaker 2: I don't blame them for feeling slighted. He prioritized his

46
00:02:22,720 --> 00:02:26,400
Speaker 2: mother over my wishes over my needs. He let my

47
00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:29,880
Speaker 2: family blame me and said nothing for over two years,

48
00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:35,040
Speaker 2: knowing he could have prevented it. Wait a minute, he

49
00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:38,040
Speaker 2: let my family blame me and said nothing for over

50
00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:40,440
Speaker 2: two years. Did you say nothing to your family?

51
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:43,160
Speaker 3: Yeah? I feel like you could easily explain to me, like, hey,

52
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,919
Speaker 3: I didn't want this. I was not choosing to have

53
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:46,360
Speaker 3: her there.

54
00:02:46,639 --> 00:02:47,160
Speaker 1: Yeah.

55
00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:50,799
Speaker 3: Everyone just needs as calm down here, except for op right.

56
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,600
Speaker 1: No, that's yeah, hmm.

57
00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,480
Speaker 2: I've told him she cannot come to the birth of

58
00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:58,120
Speaker 2: our second, and that my first born and I will

59
00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:01,120
Speaker 2: be leaving once I can pack the things up. I

60
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:03,840
Speaker 2: have told him he cannot come to the birth of

61
00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:06,520
Speaker 2: our second, and that my first born and I will

62
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,440
Speaker 2: be leaving once I can pack the things up. She

63
00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:12,600
Speaker 2: his mom, told me that she did not care about

64
00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,440
Speaker 2: my wishes. She told me how her happiness mattered more

65
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,280
Speaker 2: than mine. She told me that my stance was ridiculous

66
00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:18,720
Speaker 2: and that she.

67
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:21,000
Speaker 1: Needs to be there to meet her baby.

68
00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,160
Speaker 2: She told me that wanting space to adjust was unnecessary

69
00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:26,880
Speaker 2: and told me that I was being delusional to think

70
00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:30,239
Speaker 2: I could keep her away. He knew about all of this.

71
00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:33,160
Speaker 2: He knew, and he still gave her what she wanted.

72
00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:37,000
Speaker 2: He knew about this and lied to me. I cannot

73
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,280
Speaker 2: trust him to be at the hospital with me. I

74
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:41,320
Speaker 2: do not want to see his face as I'm having

75
00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:44,040
Speaker 2: my surgery. I don't have anyone else, but I'd rather

76
00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:46,840
Speaker 2: be alone than be with him. Does this make me

77
00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:51,680
Speaker 2: the ale? I feel awful for even wanting to do this.

78
00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:55,200
Speaker 2: This has devastated me, and there is an edit to

79
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:57,920
Speaker 2: add all the stuff she said was when I was

80
00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:01,720
Speaker 2: pregnant with my first child, had antenatal anxiety, and she

81
00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:05,040
Speaker 2: used this against me. She would trigger attacks and then

82
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:08,680
Speaker 2: call me mental in order to get him on her side.

83
00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:11,160
Speaker 2: He was not sure what to believe and cut her

84
00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:14,200
Speaker 2: off because he didn't think I was lying. She works

85
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:17,000
Speaker 2: at the hospital where I had my baby as a doctor.

86
00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:20,240
Speaker 2: I did tell the staff about the no visitors rule,

87
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:23,479
Speaker 2: but she can bypass it with her access card. Which

88
00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:25,560
Speaker 2: is that's gotta be super illegal.

89
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,080
Speaker 3: It's gotta be breaking some kind of dude.

90
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:30,000
Speaker 1: This woman thinks she's bulletproof.

91
00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:34,680
Speaker 2: A report to Hippo and afromedical license revoked for broaching

92
00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:36,560
Speaker 2: like patient laws.

93
00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:37,599
Speaker 3: It was crazy.

94
00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:39,839
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if he kept quiet to avoid a

95
00:04:39,839 --> 00:04:41,080
Speaker 2: scene in front of colleagues.

96
00:04:41,279 --> 00:04:42,360
Speaker 1: He also works there.

97
00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:43,039
Speaker 2: Dude.

98
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:44,760
Speaker 4: Okay, so not.

99
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:46,840
Speaker 2: Only has this guy been abused by his mother his

100
00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,320
Speaker 2: entire life, but he also is a coworker at the

101
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:53,840
Speaker 2: hospital she's a doctor at so it's inescapable for him,

102
00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:54,560
Speaker 2: this poor guy.

103
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,120
Speaker 3: Do we know for sure that he has been abused.

104
00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:01,200
Speaker 1: The beginning, there was that at the beginning. I miss that,

105
00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:02,039
Speaker 1: you know.

106
00:05:02,680 --> 00:05:05,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, she's an arcissistic combuser.

107
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,040
Speaker 3: And if she's a doctor, then she definitely has like

108
00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:08,839
Speaker 3: an authority over these nurses.

109
00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:11,520
Speaker 2: Of course, so I'm talking about hierarchy in a hospital.

110
00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:12,599
Speaker 1: Doctor's pretty high up.

111
00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:15,920
Speaker 3: And if she's the type of person to bypass this

112
00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:19,960
Speaker 3: this patient's request just because she's a doctor, then she's

113
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:23,480
Speaker 3: definitely the one too. I'm assuming, you know, assert herself

114
00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:25,599
Speaker 3: over others and be a little power hungry.

115
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:28,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, pull rank a bit.

116
00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:31,800
Speaker 2: The way this is reading right now, I'm seeing you

117
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:35,080
Speaker 2: and your partner are both victims of her.

118
00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:36,320
Speaker 3: Yeah.

119
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,440
Speaker 2: The fact they argued made me think he didn't know

120
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:42,240
Speaker 2: and she did it because he went low contact. I

121
00:05:42,279 --> 00:05:45,720
Speaker 2: cannot change hospitals because I'm high risk and under the

122
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:49,320
Speaker 2: care of specific doctors. My plan has been created and

123
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,280
Speaker 2: I have to stick to it, and there's a second

124
00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:55,440
Speaker 2: edit for those requesting I report her for accessing my records.

125
00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:58,520
Speaker 2: It has already been reported and is being investigated. Good

126
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:02,400
Speaker 2: of reporting her accessing my room. I'll speak with the

127
00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:05,120
Speaker 2: hospital in the morning, and there are some comments here.

128
00:06:05,279 --> 00:06:08,159
Speaker 2: Come in number one, not the a hole. Just tell

129
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:10,400
Speaker 2: the labor and delivery crew you don't want anyone there.

130
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:14,760
Speaker 2: They'll keep them out. Opie replies, I told the staff

131
00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:18,120
Speaker 2: the first time she works at the hospital. That's how

132
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:20,400
Speaker 2: she got access for my first pregnancy.

133
00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:20,719
Speaker 4: Reply.

134
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:24,120
Speaker 2: I bet dollars to donuts she's accessed your records, which

135
00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:26,720
Speaker 2: is a major hip of viholation. You can get her

136
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,520
Speaker 2: fired immediately. Ask medical records to see who's accessed your

137
00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:33,120
Speaker 2: records and tell them mother in law had no authorization.

138
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,080
Speaker 2: Hopefully that may put her job in jeopardy or even

139
00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:39,960
Speaker 2: get her fired. No more access to you, op said.

140
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,760
Speaker 2: I asked them to check because my private medical correspondent

141
00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:46,320
Speaker 2: somehow kept getting changed to my in law's home address.

142
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:50,440
Speaker 2: I never gave the hospital that address. That's insane. Wait

143
00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:55,120
Speaker 2: what her mother in law changed the information in her

144
00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:58,919
Speaker 2: records so that her medical information would be sent to

145
00:06:59,200 --> 00:06:59,800
Speaker 2: her house.

146
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:00,640
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

147
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:01,839
Speaker 1: Instead of Ops.

148
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:04,960
Speaker 3: That feels like it's breaking so many laws.

149
00:07:05,080 --> 00:07:07,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, this woman should never be able to practice as

150
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:14,720
Speaker 2: a doctor again, dude, that is insane, unbelievable. Wow, reply,

151
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:17,720
Speaker 2: have your name protected in the system. They have ways

152
00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:20,000
Speaker 2: of coding you so that no one can admit you

153
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:23,440
Speaker 2: are there. I would also consider sending a letter to

154
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:25,920
Speaker 2: the hospital asking them to protect your medical chart and

155
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:28,600
Speaker 2: name your mother in law. Tell them she used her

156
00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:31,120
Speaker 2: access in the past to get your information, and ask

157
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,200
Speaker 2: them to deny her access to it now.

158
00:07:33,560 --> 00:07:35,680
Speaker 1: It should trigger a review of your medical records for

159
00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:36,680
Speaker 1: hip A violations.

160
00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:40,000
Speaker 2: I guarantee you a woman this willing to press boundaries

161
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:43,480
Speaker 2: has been all over your medical info in violation of

162
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:43,920
Speaker 2: the law.

163
00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:45,200
Speaker 1: OP says.

164
00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,440
Speaker 2: The thing is the staff all know who I am.

165
00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:51,240
Speaker 2: My partner also works at the same hospital. They all talk.

166
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,400
Speaker 2: She'll find out where I am if someone recognizes me

167
00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:58,360
Speaker 2: and mentions it, which does not negate any of the

168
00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:01,600
Speaker 2: fact that you need to do this. Yeah, which I

169
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:04,200
Speaker 2: know you said it's already been done, but it's like

170
00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:05,480
Speaker 2: it doesn't matter.

171
00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, just do it.

172
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,560
Speaker 2: Comment to are you at the hospital now? Where is

173
00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:14,880
Speaker 2: your first child? Can your family take them under their care?

174
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:17,600
Speaker 2: So you can focus on your and your baby two's

175
00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,960
Speaker 2: health and well being. Could family of yours go to

176
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,160
Speaker 2: your house and gather what's needed for you and the

177
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:25,880
Speaker 2: kiddos and have it ready for when you leave the hospital.

178
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:29,080
Speaker 2: The other comments are right about reporting mother in law

179
00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,520
Speaker 2: if she tries this BS again. I'm so sorry you're

180
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:34,600
Speaker 2: just finding out about your partner breaking trust. That's such

181
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:38,240
Speaker 2: a sacred bond. At a minimum, I would suggest separate therapy.

182
00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,480
Speaker 2: I'm a big advocate for mental health care for all

183
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,079
Speaker 2: and the couple's counseling. If you're not ready to cut

184
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:45,800
Speaker 2: ties with partner, there's time in the future to worry

185
00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:48,120
Speaker 2: about your relationship and what you may do. But priority

186
00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:50,680
Speaker 2: needs to be one where are you and the baby's

187
00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:53,040
Speaker 2: going to be? And two getting the items ahead of

188
00:08:53,040 --> 00:08:56,800
Speaker 2: time and first born with your family, and three, most importantly,

189
00:08:57,040 --> 00:09:00,760
Speaker 2: your health and baby twos birth. Here If you want

190
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:03,160
Speaker 2: a friend to chat, I'm no stranger to struggle.

191
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:04,319
Speaker 1: You are not alone.

192
00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,400
Speaker 2: Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times

193
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:09,760
Speaker 2: if one only remembers to turn on the light. Ohp,

194
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:11,880
Speaker 2: he replies, No, I want to get checked out in

195
00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:14,680
Speaker 2: the morning because crying has left me with abdominal pain.

196
00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:20,040
Speaker 3: Oh dang, it's that hard of crying. That's so sad.

197
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:25,520
Speaker 2: Oh dude, dang me if my firstborn is sleeping with

198
00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:28,160
Speaker 2: me tonight, he came in for cuddles and fell asleep.

199
00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:31,160
Speaker 2: I'm going to make arrangements in the morning. My partner

200
00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:34,080
Speaker 2: wants me to stay and says he'll leave until I

201
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:36,719
Speaker 2: ask him back, but I'd rather be somewhere. My mother

202
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,560
Speaker 2: in law doesn't have the address for Thank you for

203
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:42,480
Speaker 2: your kind words. I will look into therapy because it

204
00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,680
Speaker 2: is important to have a safe space to talk to someone.

205
00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:46,600
Speaker 1: This will take its toll sooner or later.

206
00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,360
Speaker 2: I'm kind of in denial right now, and there is

207
00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:52,920
Speaker 2: an update before you get into it. Hm, I you know,

208
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:58,000
Speaker 2: regardless of how I feel about like the situation with

209
00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,520
Speaker 2: her partner. Yep, that commenter was right that it's like

210
00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:05,480
Speaker 2: you really only need to worry about giving birth. Yeah,

211
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:10,120
Speaker 2: and like making sure that you're in a good, healthy environment, right,

212
00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,640
Speaker 2: having everything ready, having your child being taken care of,

213
00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:14,880
Speaker 2: and just give you birth.

214
00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:18,960
Speaker 3: I totally agree. Figure out your marital problems a bit later. Yeah,

215
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:22,360
Speaker 3: this is top priority you and your safety and health

216
00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:23,960
Speaker 3: as well as your child's.

217
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:27,720
Speaker 2: If I was you right, and you you're in this hospital.

218
00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:30,319
Speaker 2: I would actually not go to the second to a

219
00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,479
Speaker 2: different hospital, because you might be looking at an opportunity

220
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:37,040
Speaker 2: low key to make a crap ton of money off

221
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:40,560
Speaker 2: of this hospital oohoo, because you should go to them

222
00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:43,840
Speaker 2: and be like exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit CE. Why

223
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:46,440
Speaker 2: this woman is not allowed near me.

224
00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:47,640
Speaker 1: It is your.

225
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:52,160
Speaker 2: Responsibility to make sure that your practicing doctor does not

226
00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:58,920
Speaker 2: break violate, violate any regulations or my just personal wishes

227
00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:02,600
Speaker 2: as a patient to be left alone by her right.

228
00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:05,360
Speaker 2: That is on y'all to fix. And if she breaks

229
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:08,280
Speaker 2: it again, boil boy. Do I bet you have a

230
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:09,960
Speaker 2: case for like something?

231
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:10,640
Speaker 1: Yeah?

232
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,360
Speaker 3: Pay for that birth?

233
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:15,600
Speaker 2: They're expensive, Yeah, yeah, you might get it for free.

234
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:16,920
Speaker 1: Yeah.

235
00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:21,440
Speaker 2: Update hello again. This is a small update from me

236
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:24,640
Speaker 2: for those who were wondering. Firstly, I contacted the hospital

237
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:27,760
Speaker 2: about my upcoming admission. I was redirected to a safeguarding

238
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:30,760
Speaker 2: line and explained to the situation. They have confirmed my

239
00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:33,679
Speaker 2: file is still showing as locked and have taken her

240
00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:38,280
Speaker 2: details in order to ensure she is prevented access to me.

241
00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:41,199
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if this will guarantee she stays away,

242
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:44,080
Speaker 2: but if she doesn't I will not be accountable or

243
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:46,920
Speaker 2: to blame for the consequences of her actions. Secondly, I

244
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:50,839
Speaker 2: did contact the hospital about the previous incident. They are

245
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:55,359
Speaker 2: being shifty to say the least, contact a lawyer, immediately

246
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,679
Speaker 2: contact a lawyer. They do not want to take the

247
00:11:57,720 --> 00:12:00,920
Speaker 2: complaint because I should have contacted them there and then,

248
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:04,839
Speaker 2: which I have already explained. It was then that they

249
00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,040
Speaker 2: did not want to take it because a member of

250
00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:10,199
Speaker 2: the staff was involved and that wasn't what they deal with.

251
00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:13,120
Speaker 2: I have been sure to get their refusal in writing

252
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,079
Speaker 2: good good. I was passed around to various other departments.

253
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:18,679
Speaker 2: One has agreed to look into the previous incident if

254
00:12:18,679 --> 00:12:22,319
Speaker 2: she violates my request a second time. No, they should

255
00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:25,640
Speaker 2: be looking into it immediately right now, because she already

256
00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:29,320
Speaker 2: violated it a first time. Thirdly, I've spoken to my

257
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,120
Speaker 2: lawyers about quite a few things.

258
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:31,880
Speaker 1: Let's go.

259
00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:35,880
Speaker 2: I have sent everything to my lawyer. I cannot disclose

260
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:38,080
Speaker 2: them on here, but now everything is being set in motion.

261
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:39,560
Speaker 1: Huzzah, my god.

262
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:42,079
Speaker 2: Finally, this is the update that will get a lot

263
00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:45,800
Speaker 2: of backlash from most of you. My mother in law

264
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:49,240
Speaker 2: has my hospital date. She sent a message stating that

265
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:52,280
Speaker 2: she found it out from someone she works with. They

266
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:54,560
Speaker 2: were named in the message, and I'm not entirely sure

267
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,920
Speaker 2: why that person had it to begin with. There was

268
00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:58,960
Speaker 2: also a mention of how she'll already be working on

269
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:02,080
Speaker 2: that day. Pretty much guess where this is going. I

270
00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:04,600
Speaker 2: cannot do anything about it this weekend, but I will

271
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:08,040
Speaker 2: be contacting the hospital and my lawyers on Monday. Girl

272
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:13,360
Speaker 2: at this point higher private security, honestly, like, I don't

273
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:18,240
Speaker 2: know what else to do, Like you've documented this entire process.

274
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:23,440
Speaker 2: The hospital is unwilling to protect you from their employee

275
00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:24,360
Speaker 2: harassing you.

276
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:25,160
Speaker 4: Literally.

277
00:13:26,120 --> 00:13:29,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, It's like it's frustrating how she's doing all of

278
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:35,120
Speaker 3: the right steps to protect herself legally, and I mean, well,

279
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:38,199
Speaker 3: I guess trying to set boundaries to physically protect yourself,

280
00:13:38,440 --> 00:13:40,640
Speaker 3: but like nothing is happening.

281
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:42,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, no one's listening.

282
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,280
Speaker 2: They literally said I was only one time. Well, dude,

283
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:47,800
Speaker 2: she does the second time? Huh no she does.

284
00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:49,440
Speaker 1: Ah, Well, you should have called.

285
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,199
Speaker 2: It that time and we would have taken it seriously.

286
00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:53,439
Speaker 2: But since you're doing it now, it's like, oh, I

287
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:56,320
Speaker 2: should have called you right after I had given birth.

288
00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:57,520
Speaker 1: It was blind side.

289
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:00,880
Speaker 3: I kind of did though, too, Like she was still

290
00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:03,719
Speaker 3: asking around and just getting jumped around, like to all

291
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,720
Speaker 3: of these places and they weren't doing anything.

292
00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:06,040
Speaker 1: Dude.

293
00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:08,280
Speaker 2: All I hear is I close my eyes, and when

294
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,000
Speaker 2: I hear this story, I hear chitching.

295
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:12,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, chitchi y.

296
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:16,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can su the hell out of his hospital.

297
00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, and her personally.

298
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,400
Speaker 3: Yeah.

299
00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:21,520
Speaker 2: Uh. I'm not sure if I missed anything. My brain

300
00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:24,240
Speaker 2: is sleep deprived right now. I'll add it if I'm

301
00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:27,840
Speaker 2: reminded or suddenly remember. And there is an edit covering

302
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:31,680
Speaker 2: some repeated mentions. Again, I'm British. Some stuff you are

303
00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:35,040
Speaker 2: all saying applies, some does not. I appreciate it, but

304
00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:36,880
Speaker 2: my lawyers are on top of everything, and I have

305
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:40,600
Speaker 2: been sending the necessary documents, et cetera. Hospital change is

306
00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:43,040
Speaker 2: not an option. As per the previous posts, this is

307
00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:44,360
Speaker 2: the best hospital.

308
00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:44,520
Speaker 1: For me to be at.

309
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,880
Speaker 2: If anything were to happen, I would be transferred back

310
00:14:46,880 --> 00:14:47,440
Speaker 2: here either way.

311
00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:49,920
Speaker 1: Hospitals here are in trusts.

312
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:54,360
Speaker 2: She can access both that offer maternity services and the

313
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,240
Speaker 2: others that are too far from me to get to.

314
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:58,320
Speaker 1: Oh, like she can, Okay, so you can.

315
00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:00,440
Speaker 3: Even if she went to another hospital, the mom can

316
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:01,040
Speaker 3: still go to.

317
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,400
Speaker 2: It, right because she would still have access in these

318
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:03,960
Speaker 2: other hospitals.

319
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:04,680
Speaker 3: Oh Man.

320
00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,880
Speaker 2: To be strictly clear, my partner did not tell her

321
00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,240
Speaker 2: my date. I know I wrote it above, but some

322
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:13,480
Speaker 2: comments are still suggesting it was him. It was definitely not.

323
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:16,040
Speaker 2: She sent the name of the person in the message

324
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:19,360
Speaker 2: she wrote to him. This person is from her department.

325
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:21,880
Speaker 2: I cannot remember her exact job role, but I know

326
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:24,840
Speaker 2: she is in a senior position. And edit number two,

327
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,400
Speaker 2: I knew I forgot something. My aunt is trying to

328
00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:29,800
Speaker 2: swap her ships at work to be with me. My

329
00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:32,840
Speaker 2: issue is that I do not really want anyone with

330
00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:35,720
Speaker 2: me during the actual surgery. The only person I would

331
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:38,760
Speaker 2: want there is my partner right now, still a massive

332
00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:42,040
Speaker 2: no from me, and he is respecting that my mother

333
00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:44,920
Speaker 2: would faint. She couldn't even look at the pictures of

334
00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:47,320
Speaker 2: my firstborn if he had not yet been cleaned up.

335
00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:51,000
Speaker 2: Post surgery, I won't be able to walk and will

336
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,440
Speaker 2: be a sitting duck. This is when my mother in

337
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,520
Speaker 2: law is most likely to make her appearance.

338
00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:55,880
Speaker 1: Oh.

339
00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:59,360
Speaker 2: I hope she has sense enough to stay away this time,

340
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:02,080
Speaker 2: but I am a she is going to try to

341
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,080
Speaker 2: come no matter what. I'm mostly concerned about not having

342
00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:07,600
Speaker 2: anyone around because I know I will want to shower

343
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:09,680
Speaker 2: at some point, but I won't be able to if

344
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:13,400
Speaker 2: my baby is not supervised. I will have two private nurses,

345
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:15,760
Speaker 2: but I know they are not people I can realistically

346
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:18,680
Speaker 2: trust to confront my mother in law if I'm not present.

347
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,400
Speaker 2: Some have suggested doulas, which is like a midwife. I

348
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:24,600
Speaker 2: started to look into it yesterday and will continue to

349
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,440
Speaker 2: research before the weekend is over. I am really disheartened

350
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:30,440
Speaker 2: about having to compromise on my boundary. My child is

351
00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:33,040
Speaker 2: more important to me and for their sake, I will

352
00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,080
Speaker 2: do what I have to. And there is a second

353
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:38,520
Speaker 2: edit here. Oh my god, there's another update.

354
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:39,520
Speaker 3: I'm scared.

355
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:43,800
Speaker 1: I am too, And you know I get it.

356
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:48,880
Speaker 2: You're pregnant. Yep, you're upset with your partner. She feel

357
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,000
Speaker 2: he was be betrayed you, which she you know, did

358
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,400
Speaker 2: There's a lot of different ways to look at that. Yeah,

359
00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:58,240
Speaker 2: did he tell you because he was trying to save

360
00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,160
Speaker 2: you from knowing that it was going to happen and

361
00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:01,800
Speaker 2: hoping maybe it won't.

362
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:03,080
Speaker 4: Was he did he?

363
00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:03,280
Speaker 1: Not?

364
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:07,360
Speaker 2: Like, there's so many different ways. It's not just like.

365
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:10,080
Speaker 1: Black or white as to like why he did that?

366
00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:12,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I could understand, like if it wasn't in

367
00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:14,840
Speaker 3: the moment kind of a thing. If he was like,

368
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,560
Speaker 3: I don't want to stress her out even more. She's

369
00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:19,680
Speaker 3: literally giving birth right. But he knew ahead of time.

370
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,400
Speaker 2: Though, but like an hour ahead of time?

371
00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:22,320
Speaker 4: Was it only an hour?

372
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,639
Speaker 2: It wasn't like he knew forever. It was like he

373
00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:26,399
Speaker 2: knew like an hour before she showed up.

374
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:27,200
Speaker 1: He knew she was coming.

375
00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:30,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, see, because then I could understand. But I mean,

376
00:17:30,359 --> 00:17:32,120
Speaker 3: depending on what he has to do to be there

377
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,719
Speaker 3: to support ope, I I you know, if he doesn't

378
00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:38,080
Speaker 3: have anything to do, if he has time away from her,

379
00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:41,040
Speaker 3: he could be like, hey, I'm gonna go step out

380
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,600
Speaker 3: and take care of something real quick, and then he

381
00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:44,720
Speaker 3: just like stiff arms his mom or something.

382
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:48,159
Speaker 2: It's true, bro, but you can't really given the context

383
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,800
Speaker 2: of her, the upbringing and her kind of being emotionally

384
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:53,840
Speaker 2: abusive and narcissistic and stuff. It's like, I hate to

385
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,840
Speaker 2: bring up the parallel of like a frightened animal, but

386
00:17:56,920 --> 00:18:00,960
Speaker 2: if like, if someone's like abusing, you know, like you know,

387
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 2: a dog will be like you know, all you know,

388
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:06,520
Speaker 2: everything's tucked. He's like, you know, he's scared, he's shaken, right,

389
00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:08,480
Speaker 2: And then you might see that exact same dog like

390
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,160
Speaker 2: like something else. But if they see that one guy,

391
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:16,480
Speaker 2: they'll shut down because of what has happened to them.

392
00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:18,240
Speaker 1: Right right, I'm.

393
00:18:18,119 --> 00:18:20,639
Speaker 2: Thinking the same things happening with their partner in his story,

394
00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:21,040
Speaker 2: so too.

395
00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:22,840
Speaker 3: I think maybe we can give the partner a little

396
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,800
Speaker 3: bit of slack. Maybe we maybe we can be upset

397
00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:30,119
Speaker 3: because like, you know that that is upsetting, But it

398
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:32,199
Speaker 3: can be more of a conversation rather than just like

399
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,280
Speaker 3: I'm just done. It can be like, hey, like I

400
00:18:34,359 --> 00:18:38,240
Speaker 3: understand that, but we gotta work out something because she's crazy. Right,

401
00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,840
Speaker 3: most of my anger is at her, but we got

402
00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:42,880
Speaker 3: to figure out how to work as a team against

403
00:18:43,119 --> 00:18:43,720
Speaker 3: things like that.

404
00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:46,160
Speaker 2: You don't want to cut your team in half exactly

405
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:48,439
Speaker 2: at a critical juncture, exactly.

406
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:50,119
Speaker 1: But it is true that he needs to work on it.

407
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:54,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but anyway, let's just get in a second update.

408
00:18:54,119 --> 00:18:54,600
Speaker 4: Let's do it.

409
00:18:55,359 --> 00:18:58,480
Speaker 2: I'm sorry for the amount of posts. Adding the information

410
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:01,520
Speaker 2: onto the previous ones makes it appear overwhelming. I realized

411
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:03,399
Speaker 2: that I was answering a lot of the same questions

412
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,240
Speaker 2: in the comments, and the edit was not the most

413
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:06,879
Speaker 2: thorough in covering other concerns.

414
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:07,560
Speaker 1: My fault.

415
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:10,480
Speaker 2: I'll use this to cover them now. Note this will

416
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:13,040
Speaker 2: make no sense if you haven't seen either of the

417
00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:16,439
Speaker 2: previous posts. Firstly, I would like to address the above.

418
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,800
Speaker 2: If you feel a particular way, if you feel free

419
00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:21,160
Speaker 2: to comment it, do not send it to me directly.

420
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,159
Speaker 2: You're wasting your time because I will continue with my

421
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:26,399
Speaker 2: decisions regardless of your opinion. The fact you feel a

422
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:28,320
Speaker 2: need to hide in my messages says a lot more

423
00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:30,480
Speaker 2: about you than it does about me. I can at

424
00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:33,440
Speaker 2: least respect the people that are openly disrespectful in the comments.

425
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:36,200
Speaker 2: I'm not ignoring any of the other messages. I've only

426
00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:39,160
Speaker 2: realized I was being sent them because I have never

427
00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:41,959
Speaker 2: messaged anyone and my notifications are off. I will get

428
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:43,399
Speaker 2: around to replying to each of them, and I do

429
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:47,200
Speaker 2: appreciate them. Secondly, there is a misconception about my partner.

430
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,840
Speaker 2: I should have cleared some stuff up in the first post,

431
00:19:50,119 --> 00:19:51,719
Speaker 2: but I was crying when I wrote it, so it

432
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:54,119
Speaker 2: really will be all over the place. I have mentioned

433
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:56,000
Speaker 2: it a lot in my replies. What he did was

434
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,440
Speaker 2: wrong and inexcusable.

435
00:19:57,920 --> 00:19:59,480
Speaker 1: He knows this. I know this.

436
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,040
Speaker 2: Aside, my partner is the one who cut my mother

437
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:05,359
Speaker 2: in law out of our lives. He made his own

438
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:08,560
Speaker 2: choice to do that two years ago. I never asked

439
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 2: him to do it. Whilst people may not believe me,

440
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:13,560
Speaker 2: he still does a lot to ensure she stays away.

441
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,920
Speaker 1: Now he's looked into moving us away.

442
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:17,840
Speaker 2: But he has a specialist role and needs a job

443
00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:21,040
Speaker 2: posting to become available. At present, the only one is

444
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:24,520
Speaker 2: in another country and he was asked for by name.

445
00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:26,840
Speaker 2: He doesn't want to take me away from my family

446
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,680
Speaker 2: and friends, so he has declined the offer. She does

447
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:32,119
Speaker 2: not come to my home. She does not see my firstborn.

448
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:34,399
Speaker 2: We do not go to their house. We do not

449
00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:37,200
Speaker 2: meet up in public or private. The most he will

450
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:40,239
Speaker 2: see her is at work, work, social events, or at

451
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 2: family gatherings. He'll acknowledge her presence to be civil, but

452
00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:47,000
Speaker 2: we stay away. If she tries to be situated with us,

453
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:49,879
Speaker 2: he will remove us. Her worming her way back in

454
00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:52,959
Speaker 2: is met with resistance from him at all angles I

455
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:56,399
Speaker 2: did mention he is overly defensive about her. To explain

456
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:58,600
Speaker 2: this better, I mean that he will be defensive if

457
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,280
Speaker 2: I mention something she has done.

458
00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:04,359
Speaker 1: It's almost like a coping mechanism for him.

459
00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:06,880
Speaker 2: What he doesn't do is go out of his way

460
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:09,400
Speaker 2: to defend her and tell me that I'm at fault, etc.

461
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 1: Etc.

462
00:21:10,680 --> 00:21:12,680
Speaker 2: There is, of course a lot more that he's done,

463
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:15,159
Speaker 2: and I will credit him for that. A lot of

464
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:17,760
Speaker 2: this is remembering he has grown up under her abuse

465
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:20,840
Speaker 2: and narcissism his whole life. He needs to go to

466
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:24,240
Speaker 2: therapy and come to understand that he has internalized things

467
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:27,480
Speaker 2: that are not normal. Agreed, beautiful, perfect.

468
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,480
Speaker 1: I agreed with all of that. Yeah.

469
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,200
Speaker 2: Thirdly, my aunt is due to be here in an hour.

470
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:33,119
Speaker 2: She says I need to hear him out about what

471
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:36,040
Speaker 2: happened at the hospital. She has seen the messages from

472
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:38,720
Speaker 2: then and says he is not entirely to blame for it.

473
00:21:39,119 --> 00:21:42,600
Speaker 2: She is someone that will hold anyone and everyone accountable

474
00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:45,919
Speaker 2: for their actions, so I can trust her opinion. I

475
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:48,199
Speaker 2: will probably take time to do so later today and

476
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 2: spend the weekend reflecting on it. Again. I think this

477
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:53,280
Speaker 2: covers everything I missed. Please let me know if I

478
00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:58,200
Speaker 2: did not blow And there's an update number three more

479
00:21:58,280 --> 00:22:01,760
Speaker 2: information another update from me. I hope I am not

480
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:05,119
Speaker 2: boring you all with them. I made a decision in

481
00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 2: relation to the hospital and my family. Before I get

482
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,480
Speaker 2: into that, I do want to say that this was

483
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:13,040
Speaker 2: never something taken lightly. I would never want to deprive

484
00:22:13,119 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 2: my partner of the opportunity to be there when our

485
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,040
Speaker 2: children are born. It is a once in a lifetime event.

486
00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:21,280
Speaker 2: No matter how many children you have, you can only

487
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:23,879
Speaker 2: be there for that child once. The reason it was

488
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:26,879
Speaker 2: considered is because I cannot have someone who treated me

489
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:29,680
Speaker 2: and has sense treated me the way my mother in

490
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:32,919
Speaker 2: law does around me. Nor would I be willing to

491
00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:36,080
Speaker 2: have someone who enabled her in getting her way by

492
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:38,760
Speaker 2: my side, especially when what I need is someone I

493
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:41,359
Speaker 2: can trust. I was still going to allow him to

494
00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:44,359
Speaker 2: sign the birth certificate after the fact he is their

495
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,119
Speaker 2: dad and they are not a pawn. Well, I was

496
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:49,879
Speaker 2: very gracious of you to, I guess, allow him to

497
00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 2: sign the official legal document that he needed to sign.

498
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:55,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, how gracious.

499
00:22:55,359 --> 00:22:57,119
Speaker 3: I'm surprised that was in question.

500
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:02,600
Speaker 2: Custody is a whole other matter, but, as I would

501
00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:05,400
Speaker 2: recommend to most people, always look into it, even if

502
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,280
Speaker 2: you have no intention of separating.

503
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:10,200
Speaker 3: Oh, that's something to ponder.

504
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:12,400
Speaker 2: I kind of like that, though, I'll have to think

505
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,399
Speaker 2: about that. I do kind of like that. Yeah, it

506
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:18,080
Speaker 2: will give you clarity on your position. We already have

507
00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:20,639
Speaker 2: a pre existing agreement that we are both happy to

508
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:22,800
Speaker 2: abide by now for the decision.

509
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:27,600
Speaker 1: I am allowing him to be present. Great, We're getting

510
00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:29,119
Speaker 1: the band bag together all right.

511
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:32,480
Speaker 2: However, my aunt will also be there in the event

512
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 2: he proves incapable of dealing with my mother in law.

513
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:37,919
Speaker 2: She will not hesitate to advocate for us all and

514
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,320
Speaker 2: she will defend my partner if mother in law tries to.

515
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:40,920
Speaker 1: Get to him.

516
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,640
Speaker 2: He has shown me his commitment to our family over

517
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,080
Speaker 2: the past couple of years. He was willing to miss

518
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:48,679
Speaker 2: the birth because he understood how much his actions have

519
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 2: impacted me. He has also said he will look into

520
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 2: therapy for his personal development. He has given me space

521
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:56,399
Speaker 2: to come to this decision on my own, and I

522
00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,000
Speaker 2: feel it is the best one for our family. I

523
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,200
Speaker 2: did speak to him at the previous incident yesterday afternoon.

524
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:05,720
Speaker 2: My aunt was right about him not being entirely to blame.

525
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:08,720
Speaker 2: A lot of it comes down to timing circumstances, what

526
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,280
Speaker 2: I witnessed and what he has told me. He had

527
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 2: seen a message from her to say she was on

528
00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:15,720
Speaker 2: her way to my room and not replied because he

529
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,280
Speaker 2: was helping me. He did not see the second message

530
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 2: where she essentially told him that neither of us was

531
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:22,920
Speaker 2: going to prevent her from having her way until after

532
00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:25,879
Speaker 2: she had already left. It was a case of him knowing,

533
00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:29,320
Speaker 2: not agreeing that she could come. The fact he didn't

534
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 2: speak up when he realized she was in the room

535
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 2: and she had picked up our baby was another fault

536
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:34,360
Speaker 2: he has accepted.

537
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:36,720
Speaker 1: However, he did leave to confront.

538
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:39,199
Speaker 2: Her after a nurse arrived to take over. We have

539
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,359
Speaker 2: a little bit more story left. We've got the gang

540
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:45,040
Speaker 2: back together. Yep, you know like this, I think this

541
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:47,240
Speaker 2: all can be just summed up with the with one thing.

542
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,240
Speaker 2: And it's like, you know, communication.

543
00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 3: Communication, isn't that always the winner? Yeah, the band aid

544
00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:56,720
Speaker 3: that you put.

545
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:59,639
Speaker 2: On a wound exactly, or like a parent or maybe

546
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 2: if this the case, like just let the ant like

547
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:05,080
Speaker 2: handle everything in terms of because I feel like curity. Yeah,

548
00:25:05,119 --> 00:25:08,520
Speaker 2: he broke the trust. So then once the trust is broken,

549
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:10,960
Speaker 2: he can't just be like, well, I know I didn't

550
00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 2: I wasn't gonna letter in, I didn't greenlight this, right

551
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:15,239
Speaker 2: And she goes, well, I can't trust that you.

552
00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:16,439
Speaker 1: I can't trust that.

553
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:18,920
Speaker 3: Well, then she was there, so how that.

554
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:22,159
Speaker 2: Happened right exactly? So so it's like he can't just

555
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:23,480
Speaker 2: be like, oh, babe, believe me.

556
00:25:23,640 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 3: Like, Yeah, we've got back up, We've got communication, we've

557
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,520
Speaker 3: got apologies. This is how we need to go about it.

558
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:33,200
Speaker 3: We don't need to explode.

559
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:37,840
Speaker 2: Yes, I like that he's getting therapy. Yeah he needs it. Yeah,

560
00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:40,879
Speaker 2: given this information, I would be a complete monster to

561
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,520
Speaker 2: keep him away. He is and will continue to be

562
00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:45,919
Speaker 2: my partner. I never blamed him from my mother in

563
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:50,159
Speaker 2: law's actions. She deserves to and will be held accountable

564
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:54,200
Speaker 2: for herself. Yes, he lied to me by keeping quiet. Yes,

565
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 2: he deceives my family by not correcting them and letting

566
00:25:57,000 --> 00:25:59,720
Speaker 2: me take the blame. He has said he will speak

567
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:03,200
Speaker 2: to them and accept the consequences of his actions. I'm

568
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 2: still hung up on the fact that you didn't speak

569
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:06,359
Speaker 2: up for yourself.

570
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, what is that girl?

571
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:12,680
Speaker 2: Why aren't we saying, hey, hey, family, I didn't green

572
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:14,160
Speaker 2: like this for one second?

573
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:14,600
Speaker 3: Right?

574
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 1: You think I would green light her.

575
00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:18,639
Speaker 2: I don't like her, I like you guys.

576
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:20,399
Speaker 1: Why would I invite the lady?

577
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,680
Speaker 2: I don't like to see the baby think.

578
00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't understand that either. Maybe there was something

579
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 3: that was going on. The ant knows now. I guess

580
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:30,360
Speaker 3: I think.

581
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:34,040
Speaker 2: We both I think we could all benefit, literally everyone

582
00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:37,040
Speaker 2: in the story except for the ant, all benefit from

583
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:39,920
Speaker 2: some you know, therapy on how to maybe communicate a

584
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:40,920
Speaker 2: little bit more effectively.

585
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:41,399
Speaker 3: Yeah.

586
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:45,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, my mother in law decided to contact me directly

587
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 2: yesterday evening. I did have her blocked for calls and

588
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:50,000
Speaker 2: text but it seems I forgot about an app. It

589
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 2: has been since rectified. Safe to say, I have a

590
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:56,000
Speaker 2: lot to update my lawyers with. My partner is aware

591
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,680
Speaker 2: of what I'm doing and fully supports it. If you're

592
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,879
Speaker 2: disappointed in my choice, that's fine. I'm the one that

593
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 2: will have to live with it. Also, if this makes

594
00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:08,680
Speaker 2: little sense, please forgive me. I'm quite drained. I forgive you.

595
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:11,840
Speaker 3: I forgive you. You just had a baby, yeah, baby time.

596
00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you have a baby for a mother in

597
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 2: law does not know how to take the word no

598
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 2: for an answer.

599
00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:18,760
Speaker 1: Wow.

600
00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:21,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, well we figured it out.

601
00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 2: Hopefully band's back. The band is back together.

602
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:28,520
Speaker 3: Band is back together. I still want to know if there's, like,

603
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,760
Speaker 3: you know, anything happening on the legal side of the

604
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:35,119
Speaker 3: hip of violations and stuff, because that was still some serious,

605
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:36,440
Speaker 3: serious crap.

606
00:27:36,560 --> 00:27:40,199
Speaker 2: There's no way that isn't malpractice in some way in

607
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:42,359
Speaker 2: some lawyers are going to handle it.

608
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:43,640
Speaker 1: So many congratulations.

609
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, congratulations on the bag you're inevitably getting from all that.

610
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that is.

611
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:52,240
Speaker 1: The end of that story. Yep, John here og host.

612
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:53,960
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to these stories. But a quick

613
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:55,680
Speaker 1: three minute break from hous from our sponsors.

614
00:27:56,280 --> 00:28:00,000
Speaker 3: My girlfriend keeps playing with her food. It's making me crazy.

615
00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 2: It's time to grow up.

616
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 3: This is a throwaway because this whole situation is so

617
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:07,320
Speaker 3: stupid and I don't want to associate it with my

618
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:10,960
Speaker 3: normal account. So my girlfriend eats popcorn by frogging it,

619
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 3: which means she picks up a handful, brings it up

620
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:16,159
Speaker 3: to her mouth, and sticks on her tongue to quickly

621
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:18,240
Speaker 3: pull pieces into her mouth. By the way, this comes

622
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:20,720
Speaker 3: from no more frogging it And if you want to

623
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:23,080
Speaker 3: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime,

624
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:25,720
Speaker 3: supread it. So the first time I saw her do this,

625
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:28,159
Speaker 3: I was very confused and a little put off. I

626
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,919
Speaker 3: asked her what she was doing and she just said,

627
00:28:31,240 --> 00:28:33,680
Speaker 3: I'm frogging it. I thought it was kind of cute,

628
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 3: if a little silly, but I didn't think much else

629
00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:38,280
Speaker 3: of it at the time. I did not realize that

630
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 3: she is utterly incapable of eating popcorn in any other way.

631
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,600
Speaker 3: I think it's gross and weird. It seems silly, but

632
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 3: the sounds and visuals are very childlike to me, which

633
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:50,800
Speaker 3: is very off putting, especially because when she frogs it,

634
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:54,480
Speaker 3: she'll often giggle in a very unnaturally way for her.

635
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,160
Speaker 3: She giggles in a high pitched way if she drops

636
00:28:57,160 --> 00:28:59,840
Speaker 3: a piece of popcorn or one falls off her to

637
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:03,640
Speaker 3: while she does it. What's the issue here?

638
00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:07,200
Speaker 2: I say, this guy's like, my girlfriend is whimsical, Like

639
00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:08,360
Speaker 2: what do I do?

640
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,960
Speaker 3: She already isn't the most mature person who ever lived,

641
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:15,160
Speaker 3: and she definitely leans into being pretty quirky, which I

642
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,959
Speaker 3: really like about her, but can also kind of slip

643
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,720
Speaker 3: into childness. I know that watching New Girl was very

644
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 3: formative to her, so I don't know if the whole

645
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:26,280
Speaker 3: frogging it thing is from that show or whatever. I've

646
00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 3: asked her to please eat popcorn like a normal person

647
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:30,400
Speaker 3: around me, but she rolls her eyes and tells me

648
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:32,240
Speaker 3: that I don't have a say and how she eats anything,

649
00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:34,920
Speaker 3: which is true, which is fair in theory, but listening

650
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:37,640
Speaker 3: to her mouth smacking for forty five plus minutes. Every

651
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:40,440
Speaker 3: time we watch a movie or TV show a couple

652
00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:43,520
Speaker 3: times a week is beginning to have an adverse effect

653
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:44,360
Speaker 3: on my mental health.

654
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, buddy, buddy, buddy, we're not talking about her

655
00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 2: lipsmacking though, right, you're talking about the technique. Yeah, so

656
00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 2: maybe bring up say, hey, it's the sound, it's the lipsmacking.

657
00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:55,760
Speaker 2: It just I don't know. It just gets to me,

658
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:57,240
Speaker 2: you know, nails.

659
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:57,680
Speaker 1: On a chalkboard.

660
00:29:57,920 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 3: Sure, if there's a way to do without that.

661
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,240
Speaker 2: Sound, right, you could work something out, dude, do it

662
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:06,040
Speaker 2: without killing her whimsy? Bro, what's wrong with you? I'm

663
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:06,560
Speaker 2: mad at you.

664
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,080
Speaker 3: I'm at the end of my rope here. There's only

665
00:30:09,160 --> 00:30:10,960
Speaker 3: so much frogging a man can take.

666
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 2: Oh God, I at the end of my rope.

667
00:30:14,280 --> 00:30:15,560
Speaker 1: I can't do it anymore.

668
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 2: Well, then you can just walk away, dude, anytime exactly?

669
00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:21,360
Speaker 3: Will I be the a hole if I unequivocally tell

670
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,480
Speaker 3: her that she can't do her hellish popcorn ritual around me.

671
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:26,440
Speaker 3: She can do it all she wants when I'm not

672
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 3: in the room. I just can't deal with hearing it anymore.

673
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 3: Some of Opie's comments from both posts.

674
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:35,320
Speaker 2: Op you sound like your dream job is like watching

675
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:40,680
Speaker 2: paint dry. Right boring, boring man, very very boring. Sorry.

676
00:30:40,720 --> 00:30:43,680
Speaker 3: I just one commentary says, quote, will I be the

677
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 3: a hole if I unequivocally tell her she can't do

678
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:48,400
Speaker 3: her hellish popword ritual around me? And how do you

679
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:51,360
Speaker 3: think you're going to reinforce this? She has already told

680
00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:53,520
Speaker 3: you that you can't tell her how to eat. Everyone

681
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:54,000
Speaker 3: sucks here.

682
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 1: Disagree.

683
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:56,960
Speaker 3: I don't know why you're so fixated on this, and

684
00:30:57,040 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 3: I don't know why she thinks it's necessary to eat

685
00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:02,320
Speaker 3: that way. That's fair. Honestly, I'm not sure how I

686
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,240
Speaker 3: wouldn't force that. I think the fixation someone comes from

687
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 3: the mouth sounds. I have a bit of missophonia, and

688
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 3: the lip smacking she does is awful to listen to.

689
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 3: As for why she insists on eating that way, I

690
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:16,640
Speaker 3: have no idea. The most generous interpretation I have is

691
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:18,720
Speaker 3: that she just really has fun doing it and doesn't

692
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:21,960
Speaker 3: want to stop. The most uncharitable view is that she's

693
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:25,239
Speaker 3: purposefully doing it to annoy me. But that's incredibly unlike her,

694
00:31:25,400 --> 00:31:28,800
Speaker 3: so I won't bet on that. Another comment says, everyone

695
00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 3: sucks here. It seems that popcorn and how she eats.

696
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,040
Speaker 3: It is more important to each of you than the relationship.

697
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 3: And that's okay. Not everyone is meant to be together.

698
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:42,800
Speaker 2: Okay, everyone here is an idiot. Yeah, I just want

699
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 2: to say this guy goes. I guess the best flight

700
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:48,960
Speaker 2: I could paint it in is that she just enjoys

701
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 2: doing it and has fun and doesn't want to stop.

702
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my god, there it is, brother.

703
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:56,480
Speaker 3: That is exactly the reason.

704
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 2: So if you just tell her that you're like when

705
00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:01,440
Speaker 2: the lipsmacking noises, it could be you. It could be

706
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:04,040
Speaker 2: the King of England, it could be literally anyone. I

707
00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:06,800
Speaker 2: want to claw my eyes out. That's a whole different

708
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,160
Speaker 2: thing than what you've been describing.

709
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 3: Exactly, exactly, get to the root of the issue here.

710
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:15,160
Speaker 3: Ope responds to that commentary, and this response is downvoted good.

711
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 3: I get where you're coming from saying that we're incompatible.

712
00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:20,120
Speaker 3: I know that this is really a common thing to say.

713
00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:22,560
Speaker 3: But our relationship is good outside of this. We have

714
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:24,920
Speaker 3: fun together and have adventures and love each other. She's

715
00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 3: genuinely my favorite person to be around, and I love

716
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:31,120
Speaker 3: almost everything about her. She's incredibly smart, super talented artist,

717
00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:34,160
Speaker 3: and has a magnetic personality. I can't speak for her,

718
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 3: but I think that she feels the same way, and

719
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 3: I don't think that either of us consider this something

720
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 3: that we would break up over. I really appreciate your comment.

721
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 3: Another commentary says, why TV, she's just eating in a

722
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:46,920
Speaker 3: way that makes you happy. If you hate it so much,

723
00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:49,840
Speaker 3: then you can leave when she does it. Opi responds,

724
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:52,640
Speaker 3: and this is also downvoted. I understand where you're coming from,

725
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:54,600
Speaker 3: but it's not as simple as just leaving the room

726
00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 3: when she does it. It only bothers me when she

727
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,240
Speaker 3: does it while we're watching TV together. We're usually cuddling

728
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:01,320
Speaker 3: or right next to you each other. We both really

729
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 3: like spending time with each other like this and would

730
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 3: both be pretty bummed if we had to cut it

731
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:10,080
Speaker 3: out completely. Another commentar says, not the A hole question mark?

732
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 3: Can she really not eat like a normal person just

733
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:15,160
Speaker 3: to make her partner a little bit more comfortable? That

734
00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 3: seems like a reasonable accommodation to ask for. Partners are

735
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:20,880
Speaker 3: supposed to be nice to each other. Surely she can

736
00:33:20,920 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 3: avoid doing that for the sake of you. Opie response.

737
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 2: Can I just really quickly say that that comment was

738
00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:29,840
Speaker 2: like not the A hole? Because you should totally kill

739
00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 2: her shine. You should totally drown her sparkle.

740
00:33:32,480 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 3: Bro Yeah yeah, Opi responds, she's really typically not like

741
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,840
Speaker 3: this for some reason, which after reading the comments, is

742
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:43,800
Speaker 3: pretty ridiculous. This is something that's really important to both

743
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,760
Speaker 3: of us. She's a really awesome person and great partner

744
00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 3: outside of this. One of the top commentarys says, sounds

745
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:52,040
Speaker 3: like you need a less interesting girlfriend. Let her be

746
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:54,320
Speaker 3: her true self and stop trying to dim her light.

747
00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:57,160
Speaker 2: Make her as boring as you op make her boring.

748
00:33:57,320 --> 00:33:59,360
Speaker 3: Ohpi responds, I definitely don't want to dim her light.

749
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 3: I just want her to stop doing this one thing

750
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:03,160
Speaker 3: around me. I get how it might read like I

751
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,320
Speaker 3: don't like her or that I want her to change.

752
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 3: I'm fine with her frogging it as long as I'm

753
00:34:07,560 --> 00:34:11,200
Speaker 3: not there, and another commentary says you're the bee, just

754
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:13,680
Speaker 3: ignore it if it bothers you. Bro Opie says, I

755
00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:15,600
Speaker 3: was previously able to ignore it when it was a

756
00:34:15,600 --> 00:34:18,200
Speaker 3: couple times a month, but it's recently become more and

757
00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:21,319
Speaker 3: more common and become a bit unmanageable for me. I

758
00:34:21,360 --> 00:34:23,760
Speaker 3: do wish that I could just ignore it, though another

759
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,439
Speaker 3: commentaarer says you're the a hole because if you think

760
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:28,840
Speaker 3: someone is immature and you want to change them, you

761
00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:31,840
Speaker 3: shouldn't be with them. You describe your girlfriend as quirky

762
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:35,080
Speaker 3: in a way that comes off is really condescending and

763
00:34:35,120 --> 00:34:36,920
Speaker 3: not at all affectionate.

764
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,120
Speaker 1: In fact, if you.

765
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:41,560
Speaker 3: Have misophobia, perhaps popcorn shouldn't be part of shared movie

766
00:34:41,640 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 3: rituals because it is a noisy food, but you needn't

767
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:46,759
Speaker 3: dictate how she enjoys it when she does eat it.

768
00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:50,120
Speaker 3: Opie says oof, I definitely don't want to be condescending.

769
00:34:50,160 --> 00:34:52,120
Speaker 3: I just wanted to explain that I don't think she's

770
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,439
Speaker 3: doing this out of malice or even putting that much

771
00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:55,279
Speaker 3: thought into it at all.

772
00:34:55,280 --> 00:35:00,280
Speaker 2: Holy crap, buddy, because you were condescending this whole time.

773
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:04,080
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, I can see how my post reads like

774
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:06,359
Speaker 3: I don't much like her, but be assured that I

775
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:09,000
Speaker 3: do really love her. I think I need to communicate

776
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 3: that to her better. But I really appreciate your comment.

777
00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:15,439
Speaker 3: Another top commentary says finds quirky girl to date thinks

778
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,800
Speaker 3: it's cute that immediately tries to get her to stop

779
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:20,840
Speaker 3: being quirky. Just go find someone you actually like instead

780
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:22,960
Speaker 3: of trying to snuff the fire out of this one,

781
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,800
Speaker 3: Opie says, I mean, I do encourage her quirky habits

782
00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:29,080
Speaker 3: a lot. I primarily finance her different art stuff. Have

783
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:33,320
Speaker 3: a ton of fun listening to her explain obscure YouTube drama.

784
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 3: I see her in every performance I can I drive

785
00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:38,160
Speaker 3: to her places because she doesn't have a license. I

786
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 3: listen to her random morning singing, and I love the

787
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:42,759
Speaker 3: way that she sees the world. I definitely get how

788
00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 3: people are getting the impression that I don't like my girlfriend,

789
00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:48,000
Speaker 3: though I really didn't mean for my post to come

790
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,480
Speaker 3: across like that, because I love my girlfriend more than

791
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 3: anything in the world, and we do have an update.

792
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:55,719
Speaker 3: But he's fighting for his life in these comments right now.

793
00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:59,840
Speaker 2: Oh, buddy, I mean, I guess I'm inclined to believe you,

794
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:05,080
Speaker 2: because you know, you probably would have just left if

795
00:36:05,080 --> 00:36:08,200
Speaker 2: you truly just didn't like this person, right Like, It's

796
00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 2: more like I think you're he's she's trying to figure

797
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 2: out like, am I truly in the wrong for asking

798
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:15,600
Speaker 2: her to change this thing about herself that she does?

799
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:18,480
Speaker 2: And buddy, yeah, you are sure, at least the way

800
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:20,480
Speaker 2: you're going about it now, I think if you bring

801
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:22,480
Speaker 2: up that you have some kind of like phobia or

802
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:24,359
Speaker 2: some kind of like you know, if you're like.

803
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,120
Speaker 3: Then just explain that if she's quirky, she's got her

804
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:30,440
Speaker 3: she's got her quirks, she about to have her phobias,

805
00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:33,120
Speaker 3: she can understand your quirks, and you could figure out

806
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:33,879
Speaker 3: a compromise here.

807
00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:39,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I would definitely, uh maybe do some exercises

808
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:42,799
Speaker 2: so that you could see what your perspective sounds like

809
00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:45,000
Speaker 2: when you write it, because dude, you said you weren't

810
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:48,040
Speaker 2: trying to be condescending. You made it sound like your

811
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:50,080
Speaker 2: girlfriend was a five year old Like.

812
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:53,839
Speaker 3: Mentally, it's sound pretty consentiently for sure. But we do

813
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:57,000
Speaker 3: have an update edit just coming into clear up some things.

814
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:57,719
Speaker 4: Misophoonia.

815
00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:03,040
Speaker 3: Wait, it says misophonia this whole time. It's okay, misophonia,

816
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:05,680
Speaker 3: We got it. Yes, I have misophonia, but it's not

817
00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:08,520
Speaker 3: the primary driver of my frustration, which is how the

818
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:12,319
Speaker 3: situation keeps repeating itself my girlfriend. I do actually love

819
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:14,400
Speaker 3: my girlfriend a lot. I know it really doesn't seem

820
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:16,359
Speaker 3: like it, and I totally gave way. People don't think

821
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:19,040
Speaker 3: I deserve her, but I really do think that she's

822
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:21,200
Speaker 3: the greatest woman in the world. I also don't think

823
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 3: that she's doing this to upset me or why this

824
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:27,440
Speaker 3: is our hill to pass away on. As for alternative snacks,

825
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:33,080
Speaker 3: I do always have alternate snacks like pretzel rolls, mixed nuts, berries, fruits, chips.

826
00:37:32,760 --> 00:37:33,720
Speaker 4: And all that good stuff.

827
00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:36,399
Speaker 3: These are all foods that my girlfriend loves, and I

828
00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:39,920
Speaker 3: take care in providing she'll still choose popcorn over these foods,

829
00:37:39,920 --> 00:37:42,360
Speaker 3: as is her right, but also that it's kind of

830
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:46,680
Speaker 3: frustrating for me personally. As for overreactions, yep, I definitely

831
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:48,800
Speaker 3: think I've led this build up for too long without

832
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:51,359
Speaker 3: having a proper sit down conversation with my girlfriend. I'm

833
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 3: going to take the rest of the day to really

834
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,320
Speaker 3: go through my thoughts and figure out what I'm actually

835
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:58,160
Speaker 3: feeling and how to properly convey that to my girlfriend

836
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,239
Speaker 3: in a way that doesn't make her feel that I

837
00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:02,279
Speaker 3: think less of her or want to change her.

838
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:04,279
Speaker 1: But you do. But both of those, But both of

839
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:05,240
Speaker 1: those things you're true.

840
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:08,160
Speaker 2: Right now, buddy, Yeah, if it's not you literally you

841
00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:10,000
Speaker 2: had me in the first half. I'm like, Oh, it's

842
00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:10,560
Speaker 2: just about the.

843
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 3: Noises, right, that's what we were thinking.

844
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:14,959
Speaker 2: And then he literally goes, it's not actually mostly about

845
00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:15,520
Speaker 2: the noises.

846
00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:18,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you do just want to change your girlfriend?

847
00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, which is bad.

848
00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 2: I mean within this context, it's bad. Look, sometimes people

849
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:26,320
Speaker 2: need to change for the better.

850
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:29,759
Speaker 3: Sure if they're like a mean right, this is not

851
00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:32,879
Speaker 3: one of those things. Right Right, when she gets home

852
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:35,080
Speaker 3: this evening, we'll talk it out. Thank you to everyone

853
00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:37,680
Speaker 3: who commented and message. You all give me some great

854
00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:40,240
Speaker 3: perspective and I really appreciate it. I one hundred percent

855
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,799
Speaker 3: would be wrong to dictate what my girlfriend can do,

856
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,279
Speaker 3: and I've definitely been approaching this in the wrong way.

857
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,359
Speaker 3: And we do have a second update, believe it or not.

858
00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:51,239
Speaker 2: Dude, I can't wait to see how this guy fumbles this.

859
00:38:51,480 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I need to see.

860
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 1: There's no way it's going to go well.

861
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 2: I doubt it if he's approaching it from the fundamental

862
00:38:57,600 --> 00:38:59,920
Speaker 2: perspective of It's like, my girlfriend is childish and in

863
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:02,359
Speaker 2: mature doing this thing, and I don't like it.

864
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:05,880
Speaker 3: Right, It's like, well, we do have a second update.

865
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:08,160
Speaker 3: So just posting this to my profile as a little

866
00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:11,320
Speaker 3: update and conclusion. First, I'd like to again thank everyone

867
00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 3: for their comments. I didn't respond to all of them,

868
00:39:13,239 --> 00:39:15,279
Speaker 3: but I did read many of them and appreciate all

869
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:17,919
Speaker 3: of them. A couple more clarifications from things I saw

870
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,960
Speaker 3: in the comments. I'm twenty six, girlfriend is twenty eight.

871
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:23,000
Speaker 3: I forgot to put that in my original post and

872
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,680
Speaker 3: only updated my Emma the a whole post with our ages. Thankfully,

873
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:28,600
Speaker 3: I am not a forty year old shocked at the

874
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:31,799
Speaker 3: immaturity of his eighteen year old girlfriend or anything like that,

875
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:37,680
Speaker 3: since several commentars projected that onto the situation. My girlfriend

876
00:39:37,719 --> 00:39:40,319
Speaker 3: can technically drive, but she doesn't have a license. That's

877
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:42,239
Speaker 3: why I drive her around. If there's one thing that

878
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:45,680
Speaker 3: she hates more than driving, it's breaking the law. I

879
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 3: finance her hobbies because I make more money than her.

880
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:51,000
Speaker 3: We equally share bills and rent, but I pay for

881
00:39:51,080 --> 00:39:53,600
Speaker 3: most things outside of that. She's got debts to pay

882
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:55,680
Speaker 3: off and savings to build up, and anything I can

883
00:39:55,719 --> 00:39:57,880
Speaker 3: do to make that easier I want to do so.

884
00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 3: As for the update slash conclusion, after my girlfriend got

885
00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:03,560
Speaker 3: home from work and had a chance to catch her

886
00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:06,000
Speaker 3: breath and settle in, I sat her down and we

887
00:40:06,040 --> 00:40:09,239
Speaker 3: had a really good conversation. Here's the short version. She

888
00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:12,319
Speaker 3: didn't realize how much her frogging it bothered me and

889
00:40:12,360 --> 00:40:15,080
Speaker 3: had I explain that better or in a less annoyed tone.

890
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:18,200
Speaker 3: She would have stopped a long time ago. Many moments

891
00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:20,759
Speaker 3: during our relationship that I chalked up to her being

892
00:40:20,800 --> 00:40:24,879
Speaker 3: immature or childish were her intentionally messing with me. In retrospect,

893
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,439
Speaker 3: that makes a lot of sense. She's going to now

894
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 3: default to assuming I'm serious rather than joking, and I'm

895
00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:33,440
Speaker 3: going to be more clear when I am being serious.

896
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:35,920
Speaker 3: When I showed her this post, she agreed that the

897
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 3: way I wrote it makes me sound like a controlling

898
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:41,759
Speaker 3: wienerhead who hates his girlfriend. True.

899
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 2: Wow, dude, But props on you for showing her this post.

900
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:48,600
Speaker 2: Yeah like that. Yeah, I like that.

901
00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:52,000
Speaker 3: She doesn't think I represented this story her or myself

902
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 3: in a very accurate or coherent way, and I have

903
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:57,760
Speaker 3: to agree there. Yeah, I promise I'm a vaguely normal

904
00:40:57,840 --> 00:40:58,960
Speaker 3: guy most of the time.

905
00:40:59,239 --> 00:41:01,560
Speaker 2: Okay, So we were just suffering from a case of

906
00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:04,200
Speaker 2: this guy didn't know how to properly write.

907
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:07,000
Speaker 3: If we've got miscommunication with the girlfriend, it makes sense

908
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:08,680
Speaker 3: that there's miscommunication with Reddit.

909
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:10,759
Speaker 1: Oh that's that's a great point, right.

910
00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:14,680
Speaker 3: So she was delighted that people were planning on adopting

911
00:41:14,719 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 3: the term frogging it and has been very happily parading

912
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:21,000
Speaker 3: around calling herself a food innovator and threatening to quit

913
00:41:21,040 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 3: her job and become a food blogger. She also says

914
00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,160
Speaker 3: to the people offering to take her off my hands

915
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:29,920
Speaker 3: that she respectfully declines. But if you're ever in Orlando,

916
00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:33,319
Speaker 3: there's a little bit more to the story. Shall we

917
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:34,480
Speaker 3: just wrap this up really quick?

918
00:41:34,560 --> 00:41:39,160
Speaker 2: I mean, look, yeah, yeah, I mean yeah, I mean

919
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 2: everything that we would have had to say has been

920
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:44,160
Speaker 2: like undone, the girlfriend is here, she's like here. Yeah,

921
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:47,880
Speaker 2: you did make yourself sound terrible. But guys, he's not,

922
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,279
Speaker 2: I promise right right. No.

923
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:52,600
Speaker 3: I honestly believed him when he was saying, like I

924
00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:55,200
Speaker 3: actually do love my girlfriend. That's why I'm like so

925
00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:58,080
Speaker 3: desperately coming to Reddit of like how do I fix

926
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,880
Speaker 3: this one thing? You know, which I understand that.

927
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:03,680
Speaker 1: And guess what, guys, guess what it was? The whole

928
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:05,480
Speaker 1: time it.

929
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 5: Was just clearly communicating. No way that clear communicator, because

930
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:16,600
Speaker 5: you can communicate like yeah, but do an'tyone know what

931
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 5: I just said? No, because it wasn't.

932
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:21,000
Speaker 3: Clear exactly exactly.

933
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:22,120
Speaker 1: I love this.

934
00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:24,560
Speaker 3: We have a little bit more to the story. I

935
00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,359
Speaker 3: think we're going to be Okay, we're removing popcorn from

936
00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 3: our movie nights, but not our cupboards and our hearts.

937
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:33,760
Speaker 3: Ha ha. We're going We're gonna look into some couple's

938
00:42:33,800 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 3: counseling to better our communication, and I'm going to reach

939
00:42:36,719 --> 00:42:39,040
Speaker 3: out to my former psychiatrists and therapist to see if

940
00:42:39,080 --> 00:42:42,000
Speaker 3: either of them have someone to recommend for individual therapy.

941
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:44,600
Speaker 3: Thank you again to everyone who lent me their time

942
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:47,880
Speaker 3: and energy. And that is the end of that story.

943
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 3: Rabo pe Yeah, no communication check. Showing the RETI post

944
00:42:54,080 --> 00:42:56,360
Speaker 3: check not always necessary, but it works.

945
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:57,000
Speaker 2: Wow.

946
00:42:57,480 --> 00:43:00,880
Speaker 3: Props to them figuring things out. We're also considering therapy.

947
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 4: Never a bad idea.

948
00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 1: Always always a good thought.

949
00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:07,440
Speaker 3: Yeah wow, So that's the beautiful end to our story.

950
00:43:08,520 --> 00:43:10,600
Speaker 1: I refuse to go to the theme park with my

951
00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 1: brother because he's in a wheelchair.

952
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:13,920
Speaker 4: What about those front of the line passes?

953
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:18,000
Speaker 1: Those are expensive? My nineteen female little brother ten broke

954
00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 1: his ankle literally this week on a Monday, so he's

955
00:43:21,160 --> 00:43:23,879
Speaker 1: bound to the couch or a wheelchair right now since

956
00:43:23,880 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: he has to keep his foots up. I live with

957
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 1: my parents forty nine male, forty five female, and we

958
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 1: had all planned a family trip to a theme park

959
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 1: two hours away this Monday, which would be a week

960
00:43:34,080 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 1: after the break. By the way, this comes from Santa

961
00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:38,840
Speaker 1: Tee and if you want to be your own stories,

962
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,680
Speaker 1: go to our slash okay story Tom suburn it.

963
00:43:40,719 --> 00:43:40,799
Speaker 2: So.

964
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:43,160
Speaker 1: My little brother had been talking about it for weeks.

965
00:43:43,239 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 1: It would be his first time he would get to

966
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:48,279
Speaker 1: go on a ride, particularly a roller coaster, since he

967
00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 1: was too scared before. But now he was brave enough. Ah,

968
00:43:51,719 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 1: he was so excited. Look, but then he broke his ankle.

969
00:43:55,120 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 1: My parents, however, are determined to still go on this

970
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:01,240
Speaker 1: strip Monday because our tickets could not be postponed. Also,

971
00:44:01,400 --> 00:44:03,239
Speaker 1: they say they really want to go. My brother would

972
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:04,920
Speaker 1: have to find a way to sit in a car

973
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:07,800
Speaker 1: for two hours on the way back and there while

974
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:11,280
Speaker 1: keeping his leg high, being safe and being comfortable. Hard,

975
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:14,520
Speaker 1: but maybe not impossible. The problem, however, arises at the

976
00:44:14,520 --> 00:44:17,600
Speaker 1: theme park itself. It's lovely. However, my brother can go

977
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:23,399
Speaker 1: on exactly five rides, which includes animatronic show and a

978
00:44:23,480 --> 00:44:24,400
Speaker 1: forty movie.

979
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:28,920
Speaker 2: Okay, the other rides are not wheelchair accessible and he

980
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,960
Speaker 2: can't walk right now. Of these five rides, will enjoy three.

981
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:34,600
Speaker 2: I think it's extremely sad to put this boy near

982
00:44:34,719 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 2: all the coasters he's been excited about for months now,

983
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:40,040
Speaker 2: and confront him with things he cannot do. I told

984
00:44:40,040 --> 00:44:42,600
Speaker 2: my parents this, and they went backcrap on me. I

985
00:44:42,760 --> 00:44:46,200
Speaker 2: was egotistical and mean and I just didn't want to

986
00:44:46,239 --> 00:44:49,000
Speaker 2: go because I didn't love them for him, et cetera,

987
00:44:49,080 --> 00:44:49,839
Speaker 2: which is not true.

988
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:51,399
Speaker 1: I just don't want to go with him right now.

989
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 1: Should we go later? My parents already stated that we

990
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:57,160
Speaker 1: would go again when he was better, just also now.

991
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:59,319
Speaker 1: I still don't like that idea. I even came up

992
00:44:59,320 --> 00:45:02,920
Speaker 1: with a list of activities that were wheelchair accessible, but

993
00:45:02,960 --> 00:45:04,719
Speaker 1: they said no, they really wanted to go to the

994
00:45:04,719 --> 00:45:07,040
Speaker 1: theme park. When I brought the bad news about the

995
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,200
Speaker 1: coasters to my little brother while trying to still be

996
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:11,880
Speaker 1: sensitive as I could, he started crying and said that

997
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:14,000
Speaker 1: it wasn't me. He just was sad that he would

998
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:16,759
Speaker 1: miss out yet again, which shocked me because it was

999
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:18,359
Speaker 1: so mature but also cute.

1000
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,920
Speaker 6: And said, oh wait, so he's saying like, oh, you

1001
00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:22,000
Speaker 6: guys can still go.

1002
00:45:22,480 --> 00:45:25,240
Speaker 4: I'll just you know, hang back. That's so sad.

1003
00:45:25,960 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 6: I think the parents are the ones being freaking thinking

1004
00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:29,200
Speaker 6: about themselves.

1005
00:45:29,320 --> 00:45:31,440
Speaker 4: This is they're the egotistical ones.

1006
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,759
Speaker 1: But they also are paying for rent and taking care

1007
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:35,880
Speaker 1: of these children, and they might want to break.

1008
00:45:35,920 --> 00:45:38,320
Speaker 4: Well, then they should go to wherever they're going by themselves.

1009
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:39,799
Speaker 1: That might be their next plan of action.

1010
00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:42,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, they're like, you guys can stay home, We're going.

1011
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:45,360
Speaker 1: My mom got mad, saying I was to ruin a

1012
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:47,759
Speaker 1: day for them before it even started, and got mad

1013
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:50,399
Speaker 1: on my brother for crying because there were other fun

1014
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:53,480
Speaker 1: things to do there. He got tantrum me and said,

1015
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:58,040
Speaker 1: but the coasters. But after some of my mom's convincing,

1016
00:45:58,239 --> 00:46:02,239
Speaker 1: he said, still crying, Okay, I'll still go for you.

1017
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 1: Stop being mad, because all have said I'll go tough translation,

1018
00:46:06,680 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: which broke my heart. I just don't think it's a

1019
00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:12,200
Speaker 1: good idea that we are better off postponing the trip

1020
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 1: rather than confronting this ten year old with all the

1021
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:18,240
Speaker 1: things he wants to do but cannot. Also, my brother

1022
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:20,719
Speaker 1: has been very sick because of the pain and has

1023
00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:24,080
Speaker 1: lost sleep, so he has still been vomiting and crying

1024
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:26,640
Speaker 1: a lot, and being two hours away from home is

1025
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:30,000
Speaker 1: quite a lot, and if you're all of a sudden nausey.

1026
00:46:30,239 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 1: My boyfriend's family sided with me, But I feel like

1027
00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:35,879
Speaker 1: I'm going crazy. So am I the a hole?

1028
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:36,880
Speaker 3: Clearly not.

1029
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:39,080
Speaker 1: Yeah you're a really nice.

1030
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:42,080
Speaker 6: Said, yeah, you're a really great sibling, and your parents

1031
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:45,840
Speaker 6: literally don't care about your brother at all. Very clearly

1032
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 6: these parents are just focused on Either they're focused on

1033
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:51,680
Speaker 6: the theme park because they really want to go to

1034
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:54,239
Speaker 6: the theme park or because they don't want to lose

1035
00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,320
Speaker 6: the money that they paid.

1036
00:46:55,400 --> 00:46:57,800
Speaker 4: But either way, they're really not focusing on their kids.

1037
00:46:58,040 --> 00:47:01,799
Speaker 1: They might have gotten those front line passes, well those

1038
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:03,560
Speaker 1: are older experiendi here.

1039
00:47:04,360 --> 00:47:04,919
Speaker 3: I don't know.

1040
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 1: Maybe they got the cool souvenir popcorn bucket or drinking,

1041
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:10,880
Speaker 1: like we have to go and they can't. They gotta

1042
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:11,799
Speaker 1: they gotta go now.

1043
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:15,960
Speaker 6: Yeah, no, op's trying to protect their sibling and parents

1044
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:16,680
Speaker 6: are not it.

1045
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:19,319
Speaker 1: We've got some comments. I came here to say, you

1046
00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:21,720
Speaker 1: will be the a hole for being ashamed of having

1047
00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 1: to be seen with your brother using at wheelchair. Instead,

1048
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:27,239
Speaker 1: you're being a super duper sister who is totally not

1049
00:47:27,400 --> 00:47:29,440
Speaker 1: the a hole, sticking up for your brother because the

1050
00:47:29,480 --> 00:47:31,720
Speaker 1: trip is going to work for him because he won't

1051
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:33,879
Speaker 1: be able to do much, while it's good for him

1052
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:36,400
Speaker 1: to get out and about even with a broken ankle.

1053
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:39,520
Speaker 1: A theme park is a draft choice. That's what I've

1054
00:47:39,520 --> 00:47:43,600
Speaker 1: been saying. We've had a miniature version of our entire

1055
00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:46,880
Speaker 1: country here, which is also like a fun day trip,

1056
00:47:47,040 --> 00:47:49,360
Speaker 1: and you'll only have to be able to watch the

1057
00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:52,719
Speaker 1: fun details. Just stroll around. He won't be missing much

1058
00:47:52,719 --> 00:47:56,040
Speaker 1: of anything. I'm not ashamed of any wheelchairs, and I'll

1059
00:47:56,080 --> 00:47:57,799
Speaker 1: never be. I'm just ashamed of the people that are

1060
00:47:57,840 --> 00:47:59,360
Speaker 1: in him. I don't mind about the wheelchairs, but the

1061
00:47:59,400 --> 00:47:59,799
Speaker 1: people that.

1062
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:03,240
Speaker 4: People in them. Oh, they really grind my gears.

1063
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:05,959
Speaker 1: They gotta stay away from them. I actually think he's

1064
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 1: fun in this wheelchair, and so does he. Haha. We

1065
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 1: do soft willies while my parents aren't looking.

1066
00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 6: Okay, these siblings seem great. They seem like they got

1067
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:15,680
Speaker 6: a good bond.

1068
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,680
Speaker 1: You have a mini town. Dang, where do you live?

1069
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:22,560
Speaker 1: The modern ro dam. It's like a miniature of the

1070
00:48:22,719 --> 00:48:26,719
Speaker 1: entire country, which is not big. Lmao. It's blast oh,

1071
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:30,040
Speaker 1: motor tram, it's amazing it is. My parents are saying, yeah,

1072
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 1: but he's in a wheelchair, so we might not be

1073
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:34,080
Speaker 1: able to see all the miniatures. He's in a wheelchair,

1074
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:37,320
Speaker 1: not blind. All of the sudden we care about his wheelchair.

1075
00:48:37,400 --> 00:48:39,879
Speaker 1: And then comes to a miniature country, but not when

1076
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,960
Speaker 1: it comes to a whole but theme park. Another commenter says,

1077
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:46,160
Speaker 1: not the A hole. First, you should absolutely double check

1078
00:48:46,239 --> 00:48:49,880
Speaker 1: about postponing the tickets. If they have so few activities

1079
00:48:49,880 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 1: that are wheelchair accessible, then it's only fair they allow

1080
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:54,680
Speaker 1: you to use the tickets when you can make full

1081
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:58,040
Speaker 1: use of the facilities. But you brought up valid bufful

1082
00:48:58,080 --> 00:49:00,800
Speaker 1: points to your parents. If the point of the trip

1083
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 1: is for the family to enjoy it, then postponing it

1084
00:49:03,239 --> 00:49:05,480
Speaker 1: for another time it's a smart decision. Even if your

1085
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,759
Speaker 1: brother was able to do everything he wanted to do,

1086
00:49:07,880 --> 00:49:10,880
Speaker 1: it seems unlikely that he will enjoy the trip overall

1087
00:49:10,960 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 1: given his current pain and exhaustion. Oh PI applies. My

1088
00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:17,200
Speaker 1: parents won't look into postponing the tickets. They say that

1089
00:49:17,320 --> 00:49:21,719
Speaker 1: they had a six week passed away deadline ending next Friday.

1090
00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 1: Like sure, that's the rules, I guess, but customer service

1091
00:49:25,320 --> 00:49:29,120
Speaker 1: might bend the rules for a bit for an unexpected

1092
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:32,239
Speaker 1: injury ten year old at least try. And we have

1093
00:49:32,320 --> 00:49:35,680
Speaker 1: some other people saying stuff, not the a whole updates, No,

1094
00:49:35,880 --> 00:49:38,200
Speaker 1: they don't. You get to put a timer on as

1095
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:40,480
Speaker 1: long as a queue and after that ends, you can

1096
00:49:40,520 --> 00:49:42,359
Speaker 1: go on. I don't know. The parents feel very like

1097
00:49:42,440 --> 00:49:44,239
Speaker 1: I feel like they got some kind of group on

1098
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:48,239
Speaker 1: online and they have to go and it can't use it.

1099
00:49:48,280 --> 00:49:50,239
Speaker 1: I'm trying to side with the parents because like, I

1100
00:49:50,280 --> 00:49:53,359
Speaker 1: feel like parents really sacrifice what like what they do

1101
00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:56,200
Speaker 1: for kids and everything. But I don't know, I'm not

1102
00:49:56,239 --> 00:49:57,040
Speaker 1: really seeing it.

1103
00:49:57,440 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 6: I just think as a parent, I think if I

1104
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:01,239
Speaker 6: were in this situation and where I was very ill,

1105
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:03,520
Speaker 6: my parents would never take me to an amusement.

1106
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 4: Kirk but oh they wouldn't in the world where they would.

1107
00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:10,480
Speaker 6: I think if I were vomiting and broke my ankle,

1108
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:12,480
Speaker 6: I think my mom would be like, yeah, We're gonna

1109
00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:12,920
Speaker 6: not go.

1110
00:50:13,239 --> 00:50:15,800
Speaker 4: You know, if I really could not enjoy any aspect

1111
00:50:15,880 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 4: of this.

1112
00:50:16,360 --> 00:50:18,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, your mom would be a ge That's really sweet

1113
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 1: of your mom.

1114
00:50:19,040 --> 00:50:19,239
Speaker 6: Yeah.

1115
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:23,880
Speaker 1: Update, I called the theme park OO and explain the

1116
00:50:23,920 --> 00:50:28,080
Speaker 1: situation good on Europe. They said they would postpone the

1117
00:50:28,080 --> 00:50:31,160
Speaker 1: tickets for US Geese and wish my brother a quick recovery.

1118
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:35,160
Speaker 6: The fact that the parents didn't even ask is crazy.

1119
00:50:35,280 --> 00:50:37,760
Speaker 1: Yep, So it's not a theme park issue anymore.

1120
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:38,280
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1121
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:40,640
Speaker 6: I think that the parents should go by themselves and

1122
00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:42,600
Speaker 6: then OP should say, hey, can you postpone these two

1123
00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:43,640
Speaker 6: tickets and take her brother.

1124
00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 1: Yeah. So fast forward to now his ankle is out

1125
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:48,880
Speaker 1: of the cast and he gets to do a lot

1126
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:51,000
Speaker 1: of fun things again, not running, but two more weeks

1127
00:50:51,040 --> 00:50:52,520
Speaker 1: and he can do that too. We went to the

1128
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:55,040
Speaker 1: theme park yesterday and he went on all the coasters,

1129
00:50:55,120 --> 00:50:57,960
Speaker 1: even the once he's been fearing for years.

1130
00:50:58,320 --> 00:50:58,880
Speaker 3: Ah.

1131
00:50:59,040 --> 00:51:02,040
Speaker 1: He talk about it the entire day yesterday and he

1132
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:04,319
Speaker 1: said he was glad he could ride the coasters for

1133
00:51:04,360 --> 00:51:07,440
Speaker 1: the first time, even with his big sits. Today he

1134
00:51:07,600 --> 00:51:09,799
Speaker 1: was still going on about it. I'm glad to see

1135
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:11,680
Speaker 1: that he had a good time. So did they go again?

1136
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:13,960
Speaker 6: Well, I think that OPI was kind of jumping in

1137
00:51:14,040 --> 00:51:16,160
Speaker 6: time and saying, yeah, I call them. They allowed us

1138
00:51:16,160 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 6: to postpone and then we went in the future when

1139
00:51:18,440 --> 00:51:20,840
Speaker 6: he got better. Oh, had a great time, which is

1140
00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:24,839
Speaker 6: just like so obviously the solution here, And I just

1141
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:28,799
Speaker 6: I can't bathom that these parents were so focused on

1142
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:31,640
Speaker 6: going the day that they said that they were going,

1143
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:35,440
Speaker 6: that they couldn't even like see that their child was hurting.

1144
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:38,680
Speaker 1: Yeah and sick. That's fun. Everyone had a blast. It's

1145
00:51:38,760 --> 00:51:41,319
Speaker 1: not the bit longest off day ever, but at least

1146
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:44,239
Speaker 1: it didn't well, although I never did get an apology

1147
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:47,240
Speaker 1: for what my parents called me, even after I saved

1148
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:50,239
Speaker 1: their tickets and their day with a cranky, disappointed child

1149
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:52,759
Speaker 1: in a wheelchair. But oh well, that's my parents for you.

1150
00:51:52,880 --> 00:51:55,000
Speaker 1: Thanks for the help on the previous post, guys, and

1151
00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:55,680
Speaker 1: you're welcome.

1152
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:56,920
Speaker 3: Well there do you go, happy.

1153
00:51:56,760 --> 00:51:59,920
Speaker 1: Ending, Sam here ogi host. We're gonna get back to

1154
00:51:59,920 --> 00:52:02,560
Speaker 1: these stories. But here's three minutes fads from our sponsors.

1155
00:52:02,560 --> 00:52:06,000
Speaker 6: First, my mother is pushing a huge debt on me.

1156
00:52:06,239 --> 00:52:07,400
Speaker 6: It ruined the family.

1157
00:52:07,719 --> 00:52:08,680
Speaker 1: Not you're cross the bear.

1158
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:10,120
Speaker 4: So to start off with.

1159
00:52:10,200 --> 00:52:13,920
Speaker 6: My mom doesn't believe in college, not university, and doesn't

1160
00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:16,760
Speaker 6: believe that it's a real education. I wanted to do animation,

1161
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:18,840
Speaker 6: and I knew there was a program at the college,

1162
00:52:18,840 --> 00:52:21,239
Speaker 6: but being sixteen or seventeen, i'd just let her.

1163
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 4: Push me to university.

1164
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:25,080
Speaker 6: By the way, this comes from poor throwaway six And

1165
00:52:25,120 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 6: if you want to spit your own stories, go to

1166
00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:30,640
Speaker 6: the r slash Okay, storytime subbured it so for future reference,

1167
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:33,880
Speaker 6: the tuition was eighteen hundred a semester. I ended up

1168
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:37,000
Speaker 6: in a major that I found boring. I also became

1169
00:52:37,120 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 6: slightly depressed because I thought that my life was going

1170
00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:42,640
Speaker 6: nowhere and stopped attending classes. I eventually went back to

1171
00:52:42,640 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 6: my high school to talk to my art teacher, since

1172
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 6: she was practically a mom to me since the ninth grade,

1173
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:49,640
Speaker 6: giving me unbiased advice. She told me about a sort

1174
00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,680
Speaker 6: of prerequisite course for the animation program at the college

1175
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:55,800
Speaker 6: that I could take. It's basically one year of portfolio building,

1176
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:59,000
Speaker 6: which is important. Also, if you do really well, you

1177
00:52:59,040 --> 00:53:02,120
Speaker 6: can go straight in to the animation program the following year.

1178
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:04,640
Speaker 6: This was great news for me, but not so much

1179
00:53:04,680 --> 00:53:08,279
Speaker 6: for my mom. You didn't understand why, and most importantly,

1180
00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:12,080
Speaker 6: she wouldn't pay this time. I said that was fine.

1181
00:53:12,120 --> 00:53:14,200
Speaker 6: I have a job and can save up. Tuition for

1182
00:53:14,239 --> 00:53:17,360
Speaker 6: this course is thirteen forty a semester before funding. I

1183
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:19,799
Speaker 6: told them my plan was that when I got acceptance

1184
00:53:19,840 --> 00:53:21,800
Speaker 6: to the program, I would drop out of UNI and

1185
00:53:21,880 --> 00:53:24,600
Speaker 6: focus on working full time to save up until then

1186
00:53:24,719 --> 00:53:27,400
Speaker 6: I would go through with the second semester. Everyone agreed

1187
00:53:27,480 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 6: that it was a good plan. Second semester was heck.

1188
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:34,320
Speaker 6: I hated every single minute of it. It was so bland,

1189
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:37,560
Speaker 6: and once again I found my motivation passing away. So

1190
00:53:37,719 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 6: when I got accepted, into the program. I was so happy.

1191
00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:43,840
Speaker 6: I dropped out of UNI right away confirm my offer

1192
00:53:43,880 --> 00:53:46,680
Speaker 6: and told my manager that I had open availability. There's

1193
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:48,640
Speaker 6: a possibility that they could move me to a different

1194
00:53:48,680 --> 00:53:51,040
Speaker 6: area which is only full time staff. Then I went

1195
00:53:51,080 --> 00:53:54,200
Speaker 6: and told my mom, and the conversation basically went.

1196
00:53:54,400 --> 00:53:57,440
Speaker 4: Like this me. Hey, Mom, I got into my program.

1197
00:53:57,520 --> 00:53:58,800
Speaker 4: I'm so happy. Mom.

1198
00:53:59,000 --> 00:54:02,000
Speaker 1: That's good. Now you're just going to finish the rest

1199
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:04,920
Speaker 1: of university and have one year under your BILM.

1200
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:07,080
Speaker 4: No, that wasn't the plan.

1201
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,399
Speaker 6: I told you multiple times that I'd be dropping out

1202
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:11,399
Speaker 6: as soon as I got accepted so that I can

1203
00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:12,800
Speaker 6: work and pay for college.

1204
00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:14,040
Speaker 4: I've already dropped out.

1205
00:54:13,880 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 2: Anyways, Well, thanks for wasting my money, and then she

1206
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:18,279
Speaker 2: hangs up.

1207
00:54:18,360 --> 00:54:22,080
Speaker 6: At this point, I'm feeling really confused and upset. I

1208
00:54:22,120 --> 00:54:25,680
Speaker 6: told her for months and months what I planned to do. Also,

1209
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:27,640
Speaker 6: I had told them that I felt bad for wasting

1210
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:29,879
Speaker 6: her money and my dad's and that maybe I should

1211
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:32,400
Speaker 6: drop out before second semester so that they don't have

1212
00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:35,160
Speaker 6: to pay another eighteen hundred dollars. It sounds like they're

1213
00:54:35,200 --> 00:54:36,040
Speaker 6: just not listened to you.

1214
00:54:36,400 --> 00:54:38,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you can tell them again and again, this

1215
00:54:38,360 --> 00:54:41,120
Speaker 1: is my plan. But they already have a plan for you. Yeah,

1216
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:43,160
Speaker 1: if you don't stick by that, your disappointment.

1217
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:45,920
Speaker 6: They said, no, it's fine and not to worry about it.

1218
00:54:45,920 --> 00:54:47,640
Speaker 6: It was starting to make me feel as though she

1219
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,920
Speaker 6: was planning this, and also why she hadn't paid the

1220
00:54:50,960 --> 00:54:53,239
Speaker 6: rest of the balance yet she was waiting to blackmail

1221
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 6: me with it. The total left is about one thousand dollars. Today,

1222
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:58,800
Speaker 6: my dad text me that they want me to absorb

1223
00:54:58,920 --> 00:55:01,520
Speaker 6: the one thousand dollars, but that it will all work out.

1224
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:01,839
Speaker 4: In the end.

1225
00:55:01,920 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 6: I got angry and ended up telling him that he'll

1226
00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:06,200
Speaker 6: get it one thousand dollars, but it will be when

1227
00:55:06,239 --> 00:55:07,920
Speaker 6: I'm done paying for my education.

1228
00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:10,879
Speaker 4: He just said we'll talk about this later. I don't

1229
00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:11,360
Speaker 4: know what to do.

1230
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 6: This is a lot for me and I definitely won't

1231
00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:15,680
Speaker 6: be able to save up with one hundred dollars or

1232
00:55:15,719 --> 00:55:18,480
Speaker 6: so going to that one thousand dollars along with my

1233
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:21,839
Speaker 6: car payments, gasp, gym membership, et cetera, all stuff that

1234
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:25,360
Speaker 6: was feasible before this on my part time minimum wage. Mostly,

1235
00:55:25,560 --> 00:55:27,920
Speaker 6: I'm afraid that she'll stop paying for something that she

1236
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:30,640
Speaker 6: does pay for me, like my phone or car insurance.

1237
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:31,160
Speaker 2: Edit.

1238
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:33,279
Speaker 6: People seem to be confused about how long I've been

1239
00:55:33,320 --> 00:55:35,280
Speaker 6: in UNI. It was my first year. If I hadn't

1240
00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:37,279
Speaker 6: dropped out, I would have had three more years to

1241
00:55:37,320 --> 00:55:40,320
Speaker 6: go edit too. Since my relationship with my mom hasn't

1242
00:55:40,320 --> 00:55:43,440
Speaker 6: been clarified, we don't have a good relationship. She is

1243
00:55:43,600 --> 00:55:46,680
Speaker 6: very controlling and is not against using threats or blackmail

1244
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:49,560
Speaker 6: going against her. When I was seventeen, basically when I

1245
00:55:49,600 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 6: started applying to UNI would have been the end of

1246
00:55:52,040 --> 00:55:52,600
Speaker 6: my world.

1247
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:52,880
Speaker 3: US.

1248
00:55:52,960 --> 00:55:54,960
Speaker 6: At the time, I had a crap fast food job

1249
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:56,839
Speaker 6: that gave me maybe one hundred and fifty a month.

1250
00:55:56,960 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 6: Oh hours were not good and not enough to become

1251
00:55:59,719 --> 00:56:04,239
Speaker 6: into pennant. From her, there are a couple of comments, dude, OK,

1252
00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:06,920
Speaker 6: but do you have thoughts. I'll just be honest.

1253
00:56:07,000 --> 00:56:10,200
Speaker 1: I'm kind of against college too, but because I think,

1254
00:56:10,280 --> 00:56:12,480
Speaker 1: you know, unless you're being a lawyer or a doctor

1255
00:56:12,640 --> 00:56:14,040
Speaker 1: or anything like that, if I could go back, I

1256
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:15,759
Speaker 1: probably wouldn't go to college because you can learn all

1257
00:56:15,800 --> 00:56:18,080
Speaker 1: these things by yourself hmm and save money. But it

1258
00:56:18,080 --> 00:56:20,480
Speaker 1: seems like, Okay, you've got like a good thing ahead

1259
00:56:20,480 --> 00:56:23,239
Speaker 1: of you, some good prospects and everything to learn in that.

1260
00:56:23,400 --> 00:56:25,960
Speaker 1: It's just I'm disappointed in parents for not like seeing

1261
00:56:26,000 --> 00:56:26,640
Speaker 1: what's best for you.

1262
00:56:26,719 --> 00:56:27,080
Speaker 4: I agree.

1263
00:56:27,120 --> 00:56:30,080
Speaker 6: I think op has a very clear, like outline of

1264
00:56:30,080 --> 00:56:33,080
Speaker 6: what how they want to get their education and what

1265
00:56:33,120 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 6: they want to do, and that that's more than a

1266
00:56:35,080 --> 00:56:37,080
Speaker 6: lot of students, I think a lot of students, which

1267
00:56:37,120 --> 00:56:38,640
Speaker 6: is I think this is also fair. But they go

1268
00:56:38,680 --> 00:56:43,160
Speaker 6: into college, you know, with undeclared or not really knowing

1269
00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:46,360
Speaker 6: exactly where they want to go, which is totally fine.

1270
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:49,200
Speaker 6: But you have this like student who is super clear

1271
00:56:49,239 --> 00:56:51,080
Speaker 6: and the parents just don't even care. But there are

1272
00:56:51,080 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 6: some comments.

1273
00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:52,319
Speaker 4: Com and one.

1274
00:56:52,560 --> 00:56:55,280
Speaker 6: You made some life decisions that went against your parents' wishes.

1275
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:58,400
Speaker 6: Now you have to deal with the repercussions of your actions.

1276
00:56:58,480 --> 00:57:00,680
Speaker 6: Welcome to adulthood. For the record, I think you should

1277
00:57:00,719 --> 00:57:02,880
Speaker 6: follow your dreams, but you should also be prepared to

1278
00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:05,920
Speaker 6: pay for it all by yourself. They are your dreams.

1279
00:57:06,080 --> 00:57:08,439
Speaker 6: Common two. What did she do after high school? Any

1280
00:57:08,480 --> 00:57:11,439
Speaker 6: ideas why she'd views university as the only way forward.

1281
00:57:11,560 --> 00:57:13,719
Speaker 6: Opie says she didn't go to any sort of post

1282
00:57:13,800 --> 00:57:16,080
Speaker 6: secondary school. I think that could be it. She just

1283
00:57:16,120 --> 00:57:18,840
Speaker 6: wants me to get a good education, especially with most

1284
00:57:18,880 --> 00:57:22,720
Speaker 6: everything needing a bachelor's degree. Common three. I completely disagree

1285
00:57:22,720 --> 00:57:24,880
Speaker 6: with you. It sounds to me like they really heavily

1286
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:27,760
Speaker 6: guilted him into it despite all of his protests. Even

1287
00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:29,959
Speaker 6: told her he wanted to drop out before his second

1288
00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:32,280
Speaker 6: semester so he wouldn't waste any more money, and she

1289
00:57:32,360 --> 00:57:35,240
Speaker 6: told him it didn't matter and guilted him into continuing.

1290
00:57:35,280 --> 00:57:38,840
Speaker 6: When you manipulate someone into doing something against their better judgment,

1291
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:42,200
Speaker 6: don't be effing surprised when they changed their mind about

1292
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:45,520
Speaker 6: it later. Besides, it was given as a gift, not alone.

1293
00:57:46,440 --> 00:57:49,160
Speaker 6: Obi says it was their idea more than mine. I

1294
00:57:49,200 --> 00:57:51,160
Speaker 6: didn't want to waste their money. Also, if it had

1295
00:57:51,200 --> 00:57:52,640
Speaker 6: been up to me, I would have taken a gap

1296
00:57:52,720 --> 00:57:54,880
Speaker 6: year to figure it out, but they wouldn't allow it.

1297
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:57,360
Speaker 6: Comment for says, as someone who was buried in student

1298
00:57:57,440 --> 00:58:00,160
Speaker 6: loan debt, save your money. It doesn't matter if she

1299
00:58:00,240 --> 00:58:02,560
Speaker 6: approves or not, because you need to do what's best

1300
00:58:02,600 --> 00:58:05,080
Speaker 6: for you. Reiterate your stance, and if she doesn't accept it,

1301
00:58:05,160 --> 00:58:07,560
Speaker 6: no harm done. And there is an update. Well, I

1302
00:58:07,640 --> 00:58:10,160
Speaker 6: know this update was posted quickly after the first post,

1303
00:58:10,200 --> 00:58:11,960
Speaker 6: but I sat down and had a talk with them.

1304
00:58:12,000 --> 00:58:14,320
Speaker 6: I started off by saying I was grateful for everything

1305
00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:16,520
Speaker 6: they did, for me, and that eighteen hundred dollars was

1306
00:58:16,560 --> 00:58:19,400
Speaker 6: no small amount, but that it wasn't fair to change

1307
00:58:19,440 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 6: things on me last second, and they didn't give me

1308
00:58:21,800 --> 00:58:25,120
Speaker 6: a chance to budget that one thousand dollars. Basically, they

1309
00:58:25,120 --> 00:58:27,960
Speaker 6: forgot everything I told them. They forgot about how I

1310
00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:30,640
Speaker 6: said I felt bad wasting their money, about my plans

1311
00:58:30,680 --> 00:58:33,600
Speaker 6: of dropping out and working when I got acceptance, everything.

1312
00:58:33,720 --> 00:58:36,320
Speaker 6: My mom actually said that I was the manipulative one.

1313
00:58:36,360 --> 00:58:38,640
Speaker 6: They put blame on my art teacher because she apparently

1314
00:58:38,680 --> 00:58:40,959
Speaker 6: didn't give me all the options, which was the course

1315
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:43,600
Speaker 6: I'll be attending now, even though I said it wouldn't

1316
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:45,440
Speaker 6: have happened if they would have just let me take

1317
00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:47,400
Speaker 6: a year off, or rather if I had said f

1318
00:58:47,600 --> 00:58:49,480
Speaker 6: it and done it, whether they liked it or not.

1319
00:58:49,800 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 6: Now they don't care if I go to college or not.

1320
00:58:51,840 --> 00:58:53,480
Speaker 6: I told them I don't want them to pay for

1321
00:58:53,560 --> 00:58:57,040
Speaker 6: these things anymore unless they've paid in full beforehand, or

1322
00:58:57,080 --> 00:58:59,000
Speaker 6: if they'd taken a loan in their name. I tried

1323
00:58:59,000 --> 00:59:01,280
Speaker 6: to keep that part civil, but they were getting upsets,

1324
00:59:01,280 --> 00:59:03,240
Speaker 6: so I turned it to the money. Turns out it

1325
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:05,600
Speaker 6: is in my name, which I never knew, so the

1326
00:59:05,680 --> 00:59:08,360
Speaker 6: debt will go on my visa after my parents are

1327
00:59:08,360 --> 00:59:10,919
Speaker 6: done paying their debts on my card, where I will

1328
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:14,240
Speaker 6: pay the minimum payments and accumulate interest as well for

1329
00:59:14,360 --> 00:59:17,760
Speaker 6: not paying it oftentime. They also don't have a thousand

1330
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:20,080
Speaker 6: dollars up front. So I learned that people on here

1331
00:59:20,160 --> 00:59:22,479
Speaker 6: can be very mean and nasty. But I've also learned

1332
00:59:22,520 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 6: that it's time to grow up and people, including parents

1333
00:59:25,520 --> 00:59:28,360
Speaker 6: in life, won't always be fair to you. Yeah, your

1334
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:31,360
Speaker 6: parents are really trying to screw you over. Also, thank

1335
00:59:31,400 --> 00:59:33,960
Speaker 6: you to the animators who pmed me. You were very

1336
00:59:34,000 --> 00:59:36,120
Speaker 6: nice at it. I'm helping my parents out with some

1337
00:59:36,200 --> 00:59:38,080
Speaker 6: of their payments, so that is why they have debt

1338
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:42,280
Speaker 6: on my card. Sorry for the confusion. No, no, why

1339
00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:45,320
Speaker 6: are we helping your parents? Why are you a seventeen

1340
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:48,720
Speaker 6: year old helping your parents with their debts?

1341
00:59:48,920 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 1: You're gonna love this or Caleb Hammer video. Do you

1342
00:59:51,960 --> 00:59:53,840
Speaker 1: know who Caleb Pammer is. He's is a guy that

1343
00:59:53,920 --> 00:59:56,640
Speaker 1: like basically looks at people's finances and then yells at

1344
00:59:56,720 --> 00:59:59,040
Speaker 1: him like why are you spending one thousand dollars a

1345
00:59:59,080 --> 01:00:01,680
Speaker 1: month on this video game or whatever? He just gets

1346
01:00:01,720 --> 01:00:03,160
Speaker 1: onto people like why are you why are you letting

1347
01:00:03,200 --> 01:00:05,000
Speaker 1: your state up and know they're not working and whenever

1348
01:00:05,120 --> 01:00:08,080
Speaker 1: they need to work anyways, So this one couple comes in,

1349
01:00:08,120 --> 01:00:11,360
Speaker 1: They're like, Oh, we're actually having our kids invest in us,

1350
01:00:11,400 --> 01:00:13,480
Speaker 1: because you know, we brought into this world and I

1351
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:15,040
Speaker 1: think they should invest in us to like go on

1352
01:00:15,160 --> 01:00:17,240
Speaker 1: vacations and paper our bills and this and that and

1353
01:00:17,240 --> 01:00:19,400
Speaker 1: the other. He's like, dude, you got this totally backwards.

1354
01:00:19,400 --> 01:00:21,560
Speaker 1: You're supposed to invest in your kids. What are you doing.

1355
01:00:21,760 --> 01:00:22,320
Speaker 4: That's crazy.

1356
01:00:22,440 --> 01:00:24,680
Speaker 6: Added to one of my grants came in and now

1357
01:00:24,680 --> 01:00:27,120
Speaker 6: I only have a four hundred and thirty three dollars

1358
01:00:27,200 --> 01:00:27,720
Speaker 6: to pay off.

1359
01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:30,320
Speaker 4: I think I'll be okay, but there is an update.

1360
01:00:30,560 --> 01:00:31,680
Speaker 4: Will they be okay?

1361
01:00:32,200 --> 01:00:35,240
Speaker 6: I guess we'll find out on the other day on

1362
01:00:35,320 --> 01:00:38,560
Speaker 6: this next episode. Well, I got punted out. It all

1363
01:00:38,600 --> 01:00:41,440
Speaker 6: started by my dad being cheery and saying good morning.

1364
01:00:41,760 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 6: I just muttered him mmmmm. He said that he'd like

1365
01:00:44,680 --> 01:00:47,240
Speaker 6: to be acknowledged, and I just said, please, don't act

1366
01:00:47,280 --> 01:00:49,480
Speaker 6: like everything is okay. This is the start of a

1367
01:00:49,640 --> 01:00:53,840
Speaker 6: huge crabstorm that was basically just me restating how I

1368
01:00:53,920 --> 01:00:56,600
Speaker 6: confided in him the most about dropping out, and he

1369
01:00:56,760 --> 01:00:58,240
Speaker 6: just turned around and called me a liar.

1370
01:00:58,360 --> 01:01:01,760
Speaker 4: Then I talked it off with You're just mom's puppet.

1371
01:01:01,240 --> 01:01:03,640
Speaker 6: And he lost it. A lot happened, but they said

1372
01:01:03,640 --> 01:01:06,200
Speaker 6: that I wasn't their daughter. Have a nice life, and

1373
01:01:06,280 --> 01:01:09,640
Speaker 6: goodbye phone and car insurance, which I expected. Anyways, I'm

1374
01:01:09,680 --> 01:01:11,840
Speaker 6: currently at my boyfriend's but I need some help.

1375
01:01:12,160 --> 01:01:15,000
Speaker 4: Where do I go? What do I do? I feel

1376
01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:16,240
Speaker 4: like I have no future?

1377
01:01:16,440 --> 01:01:17,240
Speaker 1: Do what?

1378
01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:19,600
Speaker 4: That's crazy? That's crazy?

1379
01:01:19,800 --> 01:01:21,080
Speaker 3: What I again?

1380
01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:23,280
Speaker 6: I've said this time and time again. I do not

1381
01:01:23,520 --> 01:01:28,760
Speaker 6: understand parents who are so attached to the idea of

1382
01:01:28,800 --> 01:01:31,080
Speaker 6: what they want their child's life to be, yeah, that

1383
01:01:31,080 --> 01:01:35,160
Speaker 6: they would rather kick their child out than believe in

1384
01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:36,240
Speaker 6: their child's dream.

1385
01:01:36,360 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 1: It's giving the you have to be a doctor or yeah,

1386
01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:41,400
Speaker 1: you don't know who you are, or a lawyer. You

1387
01:01:41,440 --> 01:01:44,360
Speaker 1: have to do something big. That's so sad. I did

1388
01:01:44,440 --> 01:01:46,760
Speaker 1: not see that coming. I thought she was gonna swing it.

1389
01:01:46,840 --> 01:01:50,360
Speaker 2: But kicking her out, dude, no, no, no, nikes.

1390
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:52,600
Speaker 1: Also, that's not natural. I didn't know that. What kicking

1391
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:54,640
Speaker 1: your kid out at eighteen? In the world, you don't

1392
01:01:54,720 --> 01:01:57,960
Speaker 1: kick them out until they get married. I refuse to

1393
01:01:57,960 --> 01:01:59,880
Speaker 1: tell my mother I'm pregnant. I don't want her, and.

1394
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:02,880
Speaker 4: Well, I guess there's only two to tango.

1395
01:02:03,120 --> 01:02:04,880
Speaker 1: I don't know if my family has read it, so

1396
01:02:04,960 --> 01:02:08,240
Speaker 1: no names here. So I twenty female, have finally caught

1397
01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:10,960
Speaker 1: my mother forty female off after her treatment towards me

1398
01:02:11,080 --> 01:02:14,840
Speaker 1: for years. My mother has always favored my siblings, especially

1399
01:02:14,880 --> 01:02:18,120
Speaker 1: my sister, since she believes everything my mother says as

1400
01:02:18,160 --> 01:02:20,360
Speaker 1: a fact. I guess, by the way, this comes from

1401
01:02:20,400 --> 01:02:23,400
Speaker 1: any astronaut in nineteen sixty nine, and if you would

1402
01:02:23,440 --> 01:02:25,640
Speaker 1: have smit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay.

1403
01:02:25,640 --> 01:02:28,680
Speaker 1: Storytime subured it so well. When I found out I

1404
01:02:28,720 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 1: was expecting in January, I made the decision not to

1405
01:02:31,880 --> 01:02:34,720
Speaker 1: tell my mother, as she has always told me since

1406
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:37,760
Speaker 1: I knew I was spicy relatedly active, that if I

1407
01:02:37,800 --> 01:02:40,200
Speaker 1: ever have a kid, I better not bring it to her.

1408
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:43,360
Speaker 1: That means for watching them or just visiting, because she

1409
01:02:43,400 --> 01:02:46,280
Speaker 1: would turn them against me and get them to act

1410
01:02:46,360 --> 01:02:49,720
Speaker 1: as misbehaved as she could. My mother has done plenty

1411
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:51,959
Speaker 1: of things to me in my life, and I will

1412
01:02:51,960 --> 01:02:55,040
Speaker 1: go into those if I wanted to, because it will

1413
01:02:55,040 --> 01:02:57,480
Speaker 1: honestly probably help out just to get it out. But

1414
01:02:57,840 --> 01:02:59,800
Speaker 1: to simplify it a little bit, she had me a

1415
01:03:00,120 --> 01:03:05,000
Speaker 1: rested on false charges. She has used traumatic things that

1416
01:03:05,080 --> 01:03:08,200
Speaker 1: have happened to me as excuses for why I can't

1417
01:03:08,280 --> 01:03:11,040
Speaker 1: do things, and when confronted about it, she says she

1418
01:03:11,280 --> 01:03:13,840
Speaker 1: never said it or that she never knew about the

1419
01:03:13,880 --> 01:03:17,160
Speaker 1: trauma I went through. She's also stolen my car because

1420
01:03:17,200 --> 01:03:19,280
Speaker 1: she was mad at me for stuff I never did.

1421
01:03:19,400 --> 01:03:23,040
Speaker 1: She tried selling it said car behind my back as well.

1422
01:03:23,080 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 1: After losing custody of all three of us when I

1423
01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:27,760
Speaker 1: was around twelve to thirteen. This is also when she

1424
01:03:27,880 --> 01:03:31,880
Speaker 1: had me arrested for false charges. These charges were not little, no,

1425
01:03:32,000 --> 01:03:34,840
Speaker 1: it was a felony charge, and the officer who arrested

1426
01:03:34,880 --> 01:03:37,640
Speaker 1: me realized this and sent me with someone I knew

1427
01:03:37,680 --> 01:03:40,000
Speaker 1: i'd be safe with till the following Monday to let

1428
01:03:40,040 --> 01:03:42,280
Speaker 1: things calm down for the weekend. That didn't work for her,

1429
01:03:42,320 --> 01:03:44,920
Speaker 1: so she went and called the police for the county

1430
01:03:45,040 --> 01:03:47,200
Speaker 1: I was in and told them they needed to come

1431
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,240
Speaker 1: and get me and take me to my grandparents' house.

1432
01:03:49,280 --> 01:03:51,200
Speaker 1: I didn't know any of this. I just got told

1433
01:03:51,280 --> 01:03:52,800
Speaker 1: to get in the cops car when he pulled up

1434
01:03:52,800 --> 01:03:54,840
Speaker 1: to the house. I was dropped off with my grandparents

1435
01:03:54,880 --> 01:03:56,840
Speaker 1: and left. But back to the other point I was

1436
01:03:56,880 --> 01:03:59,360
Speaker 1: making when she lost custody, of us. She didn't care,

1437
01:03:59,520 --> 01:04:01,960
Speaker 1: or at least it didn't seem like it. She barely

1438
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:04,560
Speaker 1: showed up, even with her having the ability to visit

1439
01:04:04,680 --> 01:04:07,640
Speaker 1: whenever she wanted. Then she decided, I'm moving to Florida,

1440
01:04:07,800 --> 01:04:10,560
Speaker 1: but that meant she wasn't going to visit at all,

1441
01:04:10,680 --> 01:04:13,080
Speaker 1: which I think was her goal while she was living

1442
01:04:13,200 --> 01:04:15,479
Speaker 1: off life without the worry of her kids or having

1443
01:04:15,520 --> 01:04:19,920
Speaker 1: to take care or deal with them. My grandparents were mentally, socially, emotionally,

1444
01:04:20,040 --> 01:04:22,800
Speaker 1: and physically taking advantage of me, but wouldn't say or

1445
01:04:22,840 --> 01:04:25,680
Speaker 1: do anything to my siblings. To them, my sister was

1446
01:04:25,720 --> 01:04:27,720
Speaker 1: a golden child who did no wrong, and my brother

1447
01:04:27,960 --> 01:04:30,600
Speaker 1: was just there. But I was the scapegoat for everything.

1448
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:33,960
Speaker 1: My sister messed something up, my fault. My brother talks back,

1449
01:04:34,040 --> 01:04:36,760
Speaker 1: it's my fault. They could go out with whomever they wanted,

1450
01:04:36,960 --> 01:04:39,160
Speaker 1: whenever they wanted, but if I wanted to, I had

1451
01:04:39,160 --> 01:04:41,200
Speaker 1: to have one of them with me at old times,

1452
01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:43,400
Speaker 1: as I wasn't to be trusted. I left their house

1453
01:04:43,480 --> 01:04:45,960
Speaker 1: five or six times in total the first year there.

1454
01:04:46,000 --> 01:04:48,000
Speaker 1: That's it. But I wasn't at school. I was there.

1455
01:04:48,080 --> 01:04:49,920
Speaker 1: If those five or six times, I was able to

1456
01:04:49,960 --> 01:04:52,480
Speaker 1: go somewhere I was accompanied by a sibling except for

1457
01:04:52,520 --> 01:04:55,000
Speaker 1: two since I was going to my friend's house and

1458
01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:57,520
Speaker 1: I wasn't able to invite people myself since it wasn't

1459
01:04:57,560 --> 01:05:00,280
Speaker 1: my house, which they were not happy about, but I didn't

1460
01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:02,120
Speaker 1: want others to see that, though they let me go

1461
01:05:02,200 --> 01:05:04,680
Speaker 1: by myself so they could look good to others. Lots

1462
01:05:04,720 --> 01:05:07,200
Speaker 1: of other things happened here, but due to all of

1463
01:05:07,240 --> 01:05:09,880
Speaker 1: this and other factors in my life, I was ready

1464
01:05:09,920 --> 01:05:13,360
Speaker 1: to go away for good. I knew how, when, why, where.

1465
01:05:13,440 --> 01:05:15,280
Speaker 1: I knew it all and even wrote some letters. And

1466
01:05:15,320 --> 01:05:17,800
Speaker 1: when I called my mom, you think she immediately want

1467
01:05:17,880 --> 01:05:20,280
Speaker 1: to know what's going on to make me want to

1468
01:05:20,320 --> 01:05:22,080
Speaker 1: do that, But no, she heard it was a thought

1469
01:05:22,120 --> 01:05:24,080
Speaker 1: and immediately call the cops to have them come and

1470
01:05:24,080 --> 01:05:26,240
Speaker 1: take me to a hospital for a mental hold, or

1471
01:05:26,360 --> 01:05:28,480
Speaker 1: just straight up take me to a mental hospital. My

1472
01:05:28,560 --> 01:05:31,240
Speaker 1: mother has never wanted me. She constantly hurts me over

1473
01:05:31,280 --> 01:05:33,680
Speaker 1: and over and expects me to always forgive it and

1474
01:05:33,760 --> 01:05:36,000
Speaker 1: ignore it. She found out I was pragos from the

1475
01:05:36,000 --> 01:05:39,240
Speaker 1: people I was babysitting for after they were told not to.

1476
01:05:39,480 --> 01:05:41,520
Speaker 1: Because I didn't want her in any way to know

1477
01:05:41,720 --> 01:05:43,960
Speaker 1: after they told her, I told her no. When she

1478
01:05:44,040 --> 01:05:45,800
Speaker 1: called and the first time I went over to get

1479
01:05:45,800 --> 01:05:48,080
Speaker 1: my stuff from her apartment that I guess she forgot

1480
01:05:48,160 --> 01:05:50,240
Speaker 1: the first time to give it to me. I squatted

1481
01:05:50,240 --> 01:05:52,400
Speaker 1: down to grab her little dog and she tells me

1482
01:05:52,400 --> 01:05:54,040
Speaker 1: to stand up so she can look at me. Then

1483
01:05:54,080 --> 01:05:56,800
Speaker 1: after I stam back up, she proceeded to start rubbing

1484
01:05:56,800 --> 01:05:58,640
Speaker 1: my stomach as if I was a dog. When she

1485
01:05:58,720 --> 01:06:01,120
Speaker 1: was rubbing my belly, she then proceeded to say that

1486
01:06:01,240 --> 01:06:04,040
Speaker 1: if I was and I didn't tell her, she was

1487
01:06:04,080 --> 01:06:06,919
Speaker 1: gonna be extremely pissed off about it. Like one, it's

1488
01:06:06,960 --> 01:06:09,520
Speaker 1: my child, I decide when I want to announce it

1489
01:06:09,600 --> 01:06:12,000
Speaker 1: to everyone. And two I could give an f less

1490
01:06:12,160 --> 01:06:14,479
Speaker 1: if you get mad that I don't tell you right away.

1491
01:06:14,520 --> 01:06:16,560
Speaker 1: I feel like this is probably going to get confusing.

1492
01:06:16,640 --> 01:06:18,440
Speaker 1: If I need to clarify anything, let me know. But

1493
01:06:18,600 --> 01:06:20,560
Speaker 1: am I the a hole here? Also, like I said,

1494
01:06:20,680 --> 01:06:22,960
Speaker 1: it's not all she has done, but this is some

1495
01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:29,560
Speaker 1: of what she has WEE man, a tough situation. I

1496
01:06:29,600 --> 01:06:30,640
Speaker 1: think you are.

1497
01:06:30,680 --> 01:06:32,960
Speaker 6: Clearly not the a hole, but you should very much

1498
01:06:33,040 --> 01:06:35,240
Speaker 6: get out of this place. You should get out of

1499
01:06:35,280 --> 01:06:39,800
Speaker 6: this place. Yeah, because uh, your mom is not supportive.

1500
01:06:40,120 --> 01:06:42,480
Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely not. But after she found out when I

1501
01:06:42,480 --> 01:06:45,880
Speaker 1: posted about the day after Mother's Day and someone showed her.

1502
01:06:45,920 --> 01:06:47,840
Speaker 1: I guess. She called me twice in a row. I

1503
01:06:47,920 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 1: was going to deal with her spam calling my phone

1504
01:06:49,920 --> 01:06:52,000
Speaker 1: till I answered, so I messaged what's up? Since I

1505
01:06:52,000 --> 01:06:53,800
Speaker 1: didn't want to talk to her, She said call me

1506
01:06:53,840 --> 01:06:56,120
Speaker 1: when you get a chance. So to get over with it.

1507
01:06:56,200 --> 01:06:58,400
Speaker 1: Since she wouldn't give me a reason for her to

1508
01:06:58,400 --> 01:07:01,560
Speaker 1: call over text, I called her her exists when she answered,

1509
01:07:01,560 --> 01:07:05,479
Speaker 1: were congratulations, you have successfully done all the above. Lie

1510
01:07:05,520 --> 01:07:07,400
Speaker 1: to me, Ami, nate me out of your life, and

1511
01:07:07,520 --> 01:07:09,480
Speaker 1: let someone else tell me that you're pregnant. And all

1512
01:07:09,520 --> 01:07:12,280
Speaker 1: I could say was is that all you called for?

1513
01:07:12,400 --> 01:07:14,560
Speaker 1: You didn't have anything to say about that, do I

1514
01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:17,000
Speaker 1: started to tell her that at this point of my life, no,

1515
01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:19,760
Speaker 1: she wasn't going to know about them or ever meet

1516
01:07:19,800 --> 01:07:22,240
Speaker 1: them due to her actions towards me. She started to

1517
01:07:22,240 --> 01:07:24,440
Speaker 1: go off on me all about it and at the

1518
01:07:24,520 --> 01:07:26,880
Speaker 1: end tried calling me a butt for doing it. So

1519
01:07:27,160 --> 01:07:30,000
Speaker 1: I said she was the butt due to her reaction

1520
01:07:30,120 --> 01:07:32,080
Speaker 1: to me after she found out. I also have the

1521
01:07:32,080 --> 01:07:35,160
Speaker 1: conversation on video. If she ever tried to say she didn't,

1522
01:07:35,240 --> 01:07:37,120
Speaker 1: I can send it to her and show her. She did,

1523
01:07:37,160 --> 01:07:39,160
Speaker 1: but I will not post it. Also to answer a

1524
01:07:39,240 --> 01:07:42,600
Speaker 1: comment from the other post, mainly because of hope that

1525
01:07:42,680 --> 01:07:45,160
Speaker 1: she would change after being told what she was doing

1526
01:07:45,240 --> 01:07:48,720
Speaker 1: isn't right, which I tried doing multiple times forever, even

1527
01:07:48,760 --> 01:07:51,920
Speaker 1: finding out I was pregnant. But I also never had

1528
01:07:51,920 --> 01:07:54,520
Speaker 1: anyone who would just stand by me. It wouldn't try

1529
01:07:54,800 --> 01:07:57,360
Speaker 1: the oh, but she's your mom, just give her another chance.

1530
01:07:57,600 --> 01:08:00,000
Speaker 1: She can change until now. The father of my baby

1531
01:08:00,320 --> 01:08:03,400
Speaker 1: is absolutely amazing, and when I found out we were expecting,

1532
01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:06,120
Speaker 1: he knew she was a handful and I had told

1533
01:08:06,200 --> 01:08:08,400
Speaker 1: him about her when she still had my car after

1534
01:08:08,440 --> 01:08:10,680
Speaker 1: stealing it as of now, just gotten a bag not

1535
01:08:10,800 --> 01:08:13,520
Speaker 1: long ago, and was dealing with that while the beginning

1536
01:08:13,520 --> 01:08:16,160
Speaker 1: of my pregnancy. She had the car since like September

1537
01:08:16,240 --> 01:08:18,479
Speaker 1: or October of last year, and like I said in

1538
01:08:18,520 --> 01:08:20,559
Speaker 1: the other post, wouldn't give it back at all because

1539
01:08:20,560 --> 01:08:22,840
Speaker 1: she was mad at me, but she would try and

1540
01:08:22,920 --> 01:08:24,640
Speaker 1: get me on the phone just to yell at me

1541
01:08:24,760 --> 01:08:26,600
Speaker 1: and start arguments. So I asked if he would be

1542
01:08:26,640 --> 01:08:28,360
Speaker 1: a good go between for us, and you had no

1543
01:08:28,400 --> 01:08:31,240
Speaker 1: problem doing it. You also realize that she wasn't going

1544
01:08:31,280 --> 01:08:34,040
Speaker 1: to keep being able to get to me because of it,

1545
01:08:34,080 --> 01:08:36,519
Speaker 1: and he has continued to help me with getting her

1546
01:08:36,840 --> 01:08:39,240
Speaker 1: either stop with the behavior and making sure I don't

1547
01:08:39,280 --> 01:08:40,840
Speaker 1: have to keep her in my life if I don't

1548
01:08:40,840 --> 01:08:43,439
Speaker 1: want to. Sophia, when you think about this father of

1549
01:08:43,479 --> 01:08:44,200
Speaker 1: the baby.

1550
01:08:44,040 --> 01:08:46,679
Speaker 6: I feel like we have heard very little about him,

1551
01:08:46,760 --> 01:08:48,240
Speaker 6: just that Ope thinks he's great.

1552
01:08:48,439 --> 01:08:48,799
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1553
01:08:48,800 --> 01:08:50,120
Speaker 4: How old are they? Do we know?

1554
01:08:50,280 --> 01:08:52,120
Speaker 1: It seems like she's twenty. I think she's twenty.

1555
01:08:52,320 --> 01:08:54,879
Speaker 4: Yeah. I think that you need to get away.

1556
01:08:55,000 --> 01:08:56,840
Speaker 6: I mean, it seems like you have some sort of

1557
01:08:57,000 --> 01:08:59,240
Speaker 6: you know, like you still rely on your mom in

1558
01:08:59,320 --> 01:09:02,519
Speaker 6: some way. But I think that the second that you can,

1559
01:09:02,600 --> 01:09:05,560
Speaker 6: if you can financially, I mean, if you aren't already

1560
01:09:05,640 --> 01:09:07,840
Speaker 6: financially independent from your mom, you should be. And I

1561
01:09:07,840 --> 01:09:10,639
Speaker 6: think you have to have some extreme distance from your

1562
01:09:10,640 --> 01:09:13,479
Speaker 6: mother if she's stolen your car and done all this

1563
01:09:13,520 --> 01:09:14,120
Speaker 6: horrible stuff.

1564
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:15,800
Speaker 2: The best Opie is twenty.

1565
01:09:15,880 --> 01:09:19,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, mom is forty. I think you got to get

1566
01:09:19,320 --> 01:09:20,280
Speaker 4: away from her.

1567
01:09:20,600 --> 01:09:22,800
Speaker 1: While I will always love her in some way. I

1568
01:09:22,840 --> 01:09:24,759
Speaker 1: did cry the other day when I was by myself

1569
01:09:24,840 --> 01:09:26,479
Speaker 1: due to the fact that I wish I could just

1570
01:09:26,560 --> 01:09:28,360
Speaker 1: hold my mom, But it was also a mix of

1571
01:09:28,400 --> 01:09:30,880
Speaker 1: the fact that I think it was my way of

1572
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,120
Speaker 1: starting to grieve the loss of who I wanted her

1573
01:09:33,120 --> 01:09:34,880
Speaker 1: to be as a mom, or even the fact that

1574
01:09:34,920 --> 01:09:36,960
Speaker 1: she's never going to be that way for me. So

1575
01:09:37,240 --> 01:09:38,920
Speaker 1: I have to let her go in order to start

1576
01:09:38,960 --> 01:09:41,240
Speaker 1: healing myself from me and my baby. Also, it's a

1577
01:09:41,240 --> 01:09:43,400
Speaker 1: baby boy for anyone who was wanting to know. Yeah,

1578
01:09:43,640 --> 01:09:46,120
Speaker 1: and we should be making his appearance sometime in September,

1579
01:09:46,160 --> 01:09:48,160
Speaker 1: because we all know the do day is just a guess,

1580
01:09:48,280 --> 01:09:50,479
Speaker 1: but they can't be for sure it's that day, so

1581
01:09:50,680 --> 01:09:53,880
Speaker 1: I'm just superstitious about telling the dates. And yeah, it's

1582
01:09:53,920 --> 01:09:57,000
Speaker 1: probably late September. Yeah, that's great, let's go. Yeah.

1583
01:09:57,080 --> 01:09:59,680
Speaker 6: I think you are not grieving the loss of a

1584
01:09:59,680 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 6: relie relationship with your mom.

1585
01:10:01,200 --> 01:10:02,840
Speaker 4: You're grieving the loss of.

1586
01:10:02,800 --> 01:10:06,559
Speaker 6: A like imagined relationship. I don't think you ever had

1587
01:10:06,640 --> 01:10:08,960
Speaker 6: that with her, and unfortunately, I don't think she can

1588
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:09,679
Speaker 6: ever give.

1589
01:10:09,520 --> 01:10:09,880
Speaker 4: It to you.

1590
01:10:10,600 --> 01:10:13,000
Speaker 6: Yeah, so like, find find other people in your life

1591
01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:15,599
Speaker 6: who can give you that security and that you know love.

1592
01:10:16,120 --> 01:10:18,400
Speaker 4: And it seems like your your baby daddy is doing

1593
01:10:18,400 --> 01:10:19,120
Speaker 4: that to an extent.

1594
01:10:19,240 --> 01:10:21,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh yeah, it seems like he's a pretty

1595
01:10:21,160 --> 01:10:21,639
Speaker 1: solid guy.

1596
01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:24,679
Speaker 6: I think right now it's focusing on creating the new

1597
01:10:24,720 --> 01:10:27,960
Speaker 6: family unit. Between you, your baby daddy, and the baby

1598
01:10:28,280 --> 01:10:29,880
Speaker 6: that no longer includes your mother.

1599
01:10:30,040 --> 01:10:30,400
Speaker 1: Agreed