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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment who's opening a new jewelry store.

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Speaker 2: Called Fool's Jewels, selling only the best cubic zirconias at

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Speaker 2: real diamond price. Who's the fool? Now you are by

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Speaker 2: listening to Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird

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Speaker 2: news stories around the globe, just like everyone else does,

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Speaker 2: except we've got a laser and there's other Gemstone Jezebels.

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Speaker 1: Just don't.

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Speaker 2: This first laser story is out of Nebraska. When you

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Speaker 2: return a rental car, you should always do a quick

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Speaker 2: sweep to make sure you have all of your belongings. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: even if a lot of it is stuff you don't want,

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Speaker 2: like half full water bottles and snack wrappers.

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Speaker 1: Well, that's just being kind, like clean out your own crap.

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Speaker 2: This person didn't do that, and now the police are

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Speaker 2: looking for them.

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Speaker 1: Why Why because.

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Speaker 2: They accidentally left behind a nine pound bag of mef.

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Speaker 1: I hate what. I forget that.

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Speaker 2: The local police probably have some info on who rented

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Speaker 2: the vehicle, you think, but they're also inviting whoever left

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Speaker 2: the myth the chance to own.

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Speaker 1: Up to it. In a case you post.

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Speaker 2: On social media, they say, feel free to stop by

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Speaker 2: the police department. And speak with Officer Marquez. He's more

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Speaker 2: than happy to collect your information and take you for

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Speaker 2: a short walk across the street to visit the beautiful

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Speaker 2: Hall County Department of Corrections. Jeff Jose and meth sound

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Speaker 2: like literally my worst nightman, I would die.

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Speaker 1: Could you get any more like naturally methed up? Thank

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Speaker 1: you God. There's also a photo of the drugs. If

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Speaker 1: you need some clarification, well you don't want to confuse it.

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Speaker 2: If you'll have an eight pound back and it's a

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Speaker 2: nine pound that would be embarrassing.

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Speaker 1: Unclear if anybody has been arrested so far, crack, that

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Speaker 1: wasn't mine. I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 2: This next laser stories out of Texas, well, this is awkward.

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Speaker 2: A local news station had to report on a story

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Speaker 2: this week after their own news anchor got arrested for

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Speaker 2: breaking someone's nose.

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Speaker 1: Like that, dude, I mean, I think journalists are stressed

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Speaker 1: out right now. Her name is Heather Koley.

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Speaker 2: She's been the weekend anchor at KBTX and Brian Texas

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Speaker 2: for just over a year.

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Speaker 1: And that means she's young. Yeah the weekend, Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: weekend anchors are always like gen Z.

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Speaker 2: When her station covered it, they didn't give a ton

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Speaker 2: of details, but a competing news station did. They revealed

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Speaker 2: the nose that she broke belonged to her boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: You probably deserved it.

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Speaker 2: In the report, it said the couple was arguing at

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Speaker 2: a tex Mex restaurant across the street.

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Speaker 1: From her apartment. It wasn't in the restaurant.

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Speaker 2: She apparently had a few too many margarita's. Then they

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Speaker 2: left and went back to her place, where she allegedly

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Speaker 2: punched her boyfriend in the face twelve times.

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Speaker 1: I mean, this is all I can defended himself.

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Speaker 2: Which is good is get just sit there and take it.

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Speaker 2: She also bit his arm, scratched up his other arm

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Speaker 2: as he barricaded himself in the bathroom.

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Speaker 1: Please tell me it's her ex boyfriend. At this point, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's facing charges for the whole Enchilada. Yeah, and now

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Speaker 1: most of.

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Speaker 2: The viewers are hoping they let her back on the

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Speaker 2: air just so that she can cover any updates on

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Speaker 2: her own story.

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Speaker 1: I wanted to look at the camera be like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I broke his nose. You got a problem with that?

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Speaker 1: Oh God, you've got a problem with this this just

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Speaker 1: then I may be up for arraignment more at eleven.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna rain. Yeah. This next Lazer story is out

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Speaker 1: of Horrorville, USA.

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Speaker 2: The real life farmhouse from the twenty thirteen movie The

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Speaker 2: Conjuring is in Burleville, Rhode Island, and it's open to visitors.

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Speaker 2: Visits saying I'm sorry, but it's a Hollywood movie.

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Speaker 1: It's not real.

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Speaker 2: It is. A guy named Brian Decero had been working

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Speaker 2: there until he was abruptly fired last month, all because

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Speaker 2: he was.

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Speaker 1: Allegedly caught stealing by a ghost.

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Speaker 2: The current owner of the house claims that the spirit

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Speaker 2: of John Arnold, who owned the home back in the

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Speaker 2: eighteen hundreds, told her that Brian had swiped three thousand

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Speaker 2: dollars from her cash box.

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Speaker 1: You mean it's completely sane, lady, that.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like he had a really fun work environment

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Speaker 2: his boss. The worker, Brian denies that he stole anything,

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Speaker 2: and he doesn't think Arnold's ghosts would rat him out

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Speaker 2: like that.

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Speaker 1: Quote.

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Speaker 2: For a spirit to go after a staff member in

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Speaker 2: that manner, I've never heard of such a thing at

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Speaker 2: any haunted venue, let alone the Capturing house that has

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Speaker 2: a reputable ghosts would never snitch The Headless Horsemen seventeenth century.

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Speaker 1: Ghost they have not this one. Okay.

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Speaker 2: The owner, though, remains steadfast, saying the ghosts saw it

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Speaker 2: and told her everything.

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Speaker 1: I would not suck if the ghost is a snitch

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Speaker 1: in your own house. She said.

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Speaker 2: She trusts the spirit more than any human being ever.

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Speaker 1: Party dead. This sounds like a real fun person. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: spirit with good morals. They don't think the spirit sounds

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Speaker 1: very fun to hang out with.

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Speaker 2: This next leisure story is out of Sweet Smell Headquarters.

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Speaker 2: A Dulchin Gabana has a brand new perfume that is

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Speaker 2: not meant to make people smell rich. That's because it's

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Speaker 2: a fragrance just for dogs.

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Speaker 1: I want to buy has Paraceeltan already bought all of it.

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Speaker 2: The fashion label just introduced its first scent developed specifically

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Speaker 2: for pets, and it's named after Dominico Dulce's but loved pooch.

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Speaker 2: So here's a clip promoting their new line of dog perfume.

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Speaker 3: I am delicate, authentic, charismatic, sensitive, enigmatic, because I'm not

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Speaker 3: just a dog.

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Speaker 1: I'm to pay.

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Speaker 3: Okay, the new alcohol free fragrance, Mister Dogs by Dulci

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Speaker 3: and Godana.

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Speaker 1: That sounds that does not sound real. I was like,

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Speaker 1: it's not a dog. I mean it's a crack.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's you don't want your dog to smell Enigmatic Brook.

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Speaker 1: Well, can I have my dog look that word up

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Speaker 1: for me first?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So, if you're interested, the bottle is decorated with

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Speaker 2: a twenty four carrot gold plated paw and also comes

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Speaker 2: with a DNNG dog collar that'll only set you back

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Speaker 2: around one hundred bucks.

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Speaker 1: Your critics say.

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Speaker 2: That perfumes are actually a bad idea for pets. They

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Speaker 2: say dogs rely on their sense of smell to communicate

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Speaker 2: and interact with their environment, and adding that strong sense

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Speaker 2: can be really unpleasant for them.

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Speaker 1: Oh man, but you know, I'm sure not.

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Speaker 2: Every animal feels that way. This guy, for example, has

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Speaker 2: a tough time every day deciding on what cologne to wear.

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Speaker 1: Terror and Temptation or Selle number five. That sound means

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Speaker 1: laser stories has come to it for.

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Speaker 2: The day, Enigmatic Turtle.

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Speaker 1: We'll do it again the same time on Friday

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Speaker 3: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning,