WEBVTT - Episode 5: The Wife 0:00:15.356 --> 0:00:22.596 Pushkin. Hey, it's Jake. I hope you enjoyed our season 0:00:22.796 --> 0:00:26.356 The Truth about Sarah. We'll be having a live event 0:00:26.596 --> 0:00:29.916 later this year. It's going to be a conversation between 0:00:29.996 --> 0:00:33.876 me and my co host Jess McHugh, and we want 0:00:33.916 --> 0:00:37.436 to hear from you too. What questions do you have 0:00:37.556 --> 0:00:41.516 for us about this season? Send your questions to deep 0:00:41.636 --> 0:00:45.636 Cover at pushkin dot fm. That's deep Cover All one 0:00:45.716 --> 0:00:49.836 word at Pushkin dot fm and stay tuned for more 0:00:49.876 --> 0:00:54.076 details on this event heads up. In this episode, there 0:00:54.116 --> 0:00:58.196 are references to suicidal ideation and sexual abuse. 0:01:00.636 --> 0:01:06.436 Previously on Deep Cover. The chief of VA Police called me. 0:01:07.996 --> 0:01:11.076 And said, hey, you know, I think we might have 0:01:11.116 --> 0:01:13.036 a problem with an employee. 0:01:13.916 --> 0:01:17.316 What immediately occurred to me was that as soon as 0:01:17.316 --> 0:01:21.156 I told her I'd cancer, even though she was telling 0:01:21.196 --> 0:01:22.636 me it was okay, in the back of her mind 0:01:22.676 --> 0:01:24.676 she was thinking, I can take advantage of this. 0:01:25.796 --> 0:01:30.356 Do you realize that Sarah used to bill one of 0:01:30.356 --> 0:01:33.916 your mother's bills from Dana Farmer? And I said no, 0:01:33.996 --> 0:01:34.996 I didn't realize that. 0:01:35.276 --> 0:01:36.036 I didn't know that. 0:01:37.396 --> 0:01:40.716 I was so afraid, right, I was so so afraid, 0:01:40.956 --> 0:01:43.316 not because I thought it was illegal, not because I'm 0:01:43.316 --> 0:01:45.596 thinking I'm going to go to prison, but because I'm like, 0:01:47.116 --> 0:01:50.396 they are not going to be my friends anymore. I'm 0:01:50.396 --> 0:01:51.796 not going to have these people in my life. 0:01:54.916 --> 0:01:59.676 One detail that's often overlooked in this story, Sarah Kavanaugh 0:01:59.956 --> 0:02:03.436 was married. She had a wife, a woman named Nicole. 0:02:05.076 --> 0:02:08.316 For us, Nicole was kind of the black box in 0:02:08.356 --> 0:02:11.756 this story, the person who might hold the key to 0:02:11.916 --> 0:02:16.396 understanding Sarah, because no matter who Sarah pretended to be 0:02:16.596 --> 0:02:19.916 in public, she was coming home to Nicole most nights, 0:02:20.436 --> 0:02:23.276 to the cozy little house they shared in East Granwitch 0:02:23.316 --> 0:02:27.956 Trode Island. It's a charming cape with a steep gabled 0:02:28.036 --> 0:02:32.036 roof and dormer windows and the flowering dogwood in the 0:02:32.076 --> 0:02:32.676 front yard. 0:02:34.476 --> 0:02:38.556 And we wondered what went on in that home, What 0:02:38.596 --> 0:02:43.116 did Nicole know, when did she know it? And did 0:02:43.156 --> 0:02:45.796 she see a side of Sarah that the rest of 0:02:45.836 --> 0:02:46.636 the world didn't. 0:02:47.796 --> 0:02:51.756 Nicole is an intensely private person. She never talked to 0:02:51.796 --> 0:02:57.396 the press or investigators, never made a statement, just kept quiet. 0:02:57.676 --> 0:03:02.076 We wrote her letter, and to our surprise, she called 0:03:02.156 --> 0:03:05.276 us and invited us to her house for an interview. 0:03:05.956 --> 0:03:09.876 When we met, I did something I don't usually do. 0:03:10.836 --> 0:03:14.756 I just asked her, Why did you agree to talk 0:03:14.796 --> 0:03:15.156 to us? 0:03:15.316 --> 0:03:19.596 Yeah, I asked myself that question several times before I 0:03:19.756 --> 0:03:22.796 called you. I know a lot of people are curious, 0:03:22.836 --> 0:03:26.036 and I don't have an obligation to share, but I 0:03:26.076 --> 0:03:28.836 do think that it means something to me that the 0:03:28.876 --> 0:03:32.756 story is told in whole, in full, and not part way. 0:03:34.396 --> 0:03:36.916 We're going to take a deep dive into Sarah and 0:03:36.996 --> 0:03:42.516 Nichole's house, the place where their lives converged, and the pats. 0:03:42.116 --> 0:03:43.516 They both took to get there. 0:03:44.476 --> 0:03:49.476 Sarah's path was fraught, complicated, and full of hidden struggles, 0:03:50.036 --> 0:03:55.316 struggles that would re emerge and eventually lead to the 0:03:55.356 --> 0:03:59.596 moment when federal agents came knocking. 0:04:00.476 --> 0:04:03.116 Picked up the phone just to check my messages, and 0:04:03.236 --> 0:04:05.796 that she said, you need to come home. The FBI 0:04:05.876 --> 0:04:08.796 is here. That's when I knew it was that fast. 0:04:08.836 --> 0:04:10.756 I had nothing until I had that. 0:04:26.036 --> 0:04:30.556 I'm Jake Halper and I'm Jess Mchughe and this is 0:04:30.676 --> 0:04:51.156 Deep Cover, Season six, The Truth About Sarah Episode five, 0:04:52.796 --> 0:04:53.676 The Wife. 0:05:01.316 --> 0:05:04.596 Or interview with Nicole came with a disclaimer. 0:05:05.156 --> 0:05:07.636 There's a lot of things that I frankly, I just 0:05:07.636 --> 0:05:11.196 don't know if what I was told or what I 0:05:11.276 --> 0:05:16.716 know is even true. So I can definitely speak to 0:05:16.756 --> 0:05:18.996 my perspective on things of what I understood to be 0:05:19.036 --> 0:05:23.436 true at the time that I was living in But 0:05:23.596 --> 0:05:25.676 I have found out along the way that there are 0:05:25.716 --> 0:05:29.116 things that I thought were true that just aren't. 0:05:29.676 --> 0:05:32.796 It struck me that she was basically questioning her own 0:05:32.916 --> 0:05:37.556 perception of reality, and this we came to learn is 0:05:37.556 --> 0:05:43.476 where Nicole's mind still is still spinning, still grasping for 0:05:43.596 --> 0:05:47.516 traction on the solid truth we told her we get it. 0:05:48.356 --> 0:05:50.316 Let's start from the beginning. 0:05:51.996 --> 0:05:54.596 Nicole grew up in New Mexico, but moved to New 0:05:54.636 --> 0:05:58.876 England in her late twenties. She's out doorsy, just like Sarah. 0:05:59.036 --> 0:06:01.676 So when the two of them connected online, one of 0:06:01.716 --> 0:06:05.956 their first dates was a hike. They met at Lincoln Woods, 0:06:06.396 --> 0:06:11.116 a park with rugged hills, treeline train and a tranquil pond. 0:06:12.276 --> 0:06:14.356 I just remember it being falling, you know, the leaves 0:06:14.396 --> 0:06:17.276 here in the fall are gorgeous, and it was nice 0:06:17.316 --> 0:06:19.756 out that day, and she and I always just had 0:06:19.836 --> 0:06:24.756 really good conversation and connection. It was easy. She's very 0:06:24.756 --> 0:06:28.916 easy to talk to, you know, just made you feel 0:06:28.956 --> 0:06:30.156 like you're the only person there. 0:06:31.356 --> 0:06:34.916 Nicole says, Sarah was just very in tune. Those were 0:06:34.956 --> 0:06:39.436 her words. Sarah presented herself to Nicole as a native 0:06:39.476 --> 0:06:43.436 New Englander with a brother and two divorced parents. All true. 0:06:43.436 --> 0:06:45.836 By the way. She said she worked as a mental 0:06:45.836 --> 0:06:49.836 health professional, also true. 0:06:48.956 --> 0:06:51.956 So I understood that she was a basically a social 0:06:51.996 --> 0:06:53.796 worker at the via got it. 0:06:54.196 --> 0:06:56.316 And at that point did she tell you that she 0:06:56.436 --> 0:06:57.916 was a veteran or No? 0:06:57.916 --> 0:07:00.116 No, she never told me she was a veteran. Not ever. 0:07:01.556 --> 0:07:05.316 Sarah and Nicole became close quickly, and after about a 0:07:05.356 --> 0:07:08.676 year or so, they bought a home together that cozy 0:07:08.716 --> 0:07:12.996 little I told you about in East Greenwich. Nicole says 0:07:13.076 --> 0:07:15.956 that moving in was a big deal and that Sarah 0:07:16.076 --> 0:07:17.556 had certain expectations. 0:07:18.436 --> 0:07:20.636 One thing that she was big on was she didn't 0:07:20.636 --> 0:07:25.076 want to be roommates forever, which can happen to people, 0:07:25.156 --> 0:07:28.676 especially same sex couples. And she was like very adamant 0:07:29.076 --> 0:07:32.556 that she didn't want that kind of relationship. She wanted 0:07:32.556 --> 0:07:36.036 a committed love relationship, not roommate relationship. 0:07:37.196 --> 0:07:40.476 So on their first night in their new home, Nicole 0:07:40.556 --> 0:07:43.116 had a little surprise waiting for Sarah. 0:07:43.356 --> 0:07:47.796 I had her like take a bath, and then I 0:07:47.956 --> 0:07:49.996 put out a bunch of candles leading to the back 0:07:50.036 --> 0:07:52.876 deck and roses. So when she got out of the bath, 0:07:53.476 --> 0:07:56.596 I led her downstairs, so she was all relaxed and 0:07:56.636 --> 0:07:59.876 comfy and proposed at the house on the first day 0:07:59.876 --> 0:08:01.756 that we moved in, so we didn't spend any night 0:08:01.796 --> 0:08:03.436 in that house that we weren't engaged. 0:08:04.596 --> 0:08:07.916 A year later, they got married in Vermont. You may 0:08:07.996 --> 0:08:12.836 recall Sarah's Jim Buddies helped arrange the wedding. Red barn birch, 0:08:12.876 --> 0:08:18.876 pergola flowers and maple syrup buckets, the whole Eddie Bauer vibe. 0:08:19.036 --> 0:08:22.596 The pictures from that day are radiant. Nicole in her 0:08:22.596 --> 0:08:26.516 crisp white dress, looks lovingly at Sarah and her soft 0:08:26.636 --> 0:08:30.836 ivory gown. In one shot, they waved at the camera playfully. 0:08:31.396 --> 0:08:34.956 In another, they sway together on the dance floor, arms 0:08:34.996 --> 0:08:38.556 around each other with the warmth of summer light casting 0:08:38.636 --> 0:08:51.836 soft shadows. Sarah and Nicole were now a married couple, 0:08:52.516 --> 0:08:57.196 but according to Nicole, they continued to live independent lives. 0:08:57.956 --> 0:09:01.836 They had different hobbies and different friend groups. Nicole was 0:09:01.836 --> 0:09:05.196 into softball and was in a serious travel league, off 0:09:05.236 --> 0:09:08.916 and away on the weekends, and Sarah was working for 0:09:09.156 --> 0:09:13.356 veteran organizations and had to travel for that. At least 0:09:13.596 --> 0:09:18.716 that's what she told Nicole, and yet living independent lives 0:09:19.116 --> 0:09:22.956 seemed to work for them. This doesn't seem totally weird 0:09:22.956 --> 0:09:25.436 to me, by the way. I've been together with my 0:09:25.556 --> 0:09:28.236 wife for twenty eight years, and one of the main 0:09:28.316 --> 0:09:31.196 reasons our marriage still works is that we know how 0:09:31.196 --> 0:09:34.276 to give each other space. We have our own interests, 0:09:34.556 --> 0:09:39.196 our own realms. But let's face it, marriages are rarely 0:09:39.236 --> 0:09:42.796 as tidy as we imagine. They're messy by nature, and 0:09:42.836 --> 0:09:46.476 no one stays perfectly within their own lanes, especially when 0:09:46.596 --> 0:09:50.476 children enter the picture. And for Sarah and Nicole, it 0:09:50.676 --> 0:09:55.476 was precisely this issue children that forced some very hard choices. 0:09:58.356 --> 0:10:01.276 Nicole told us that she and Sarah had been planning 0:10:01.356 --> 0:10:05.836 to have kids, but then about two years after their wedding, 0:10:06.756 --> 0:10:09.876 things took a turn. Sarah came up home and told 0:10:09.956 --> 0:10:15.476 Nicole she had brain cancer, which is horrible, right catastrophic, 0:10:16.116 --> 0:10:20.596 but initially it wasn't. Actually the doctor said it was treatable. 0:10:21.516 --> 0:10:25.436 Nicole heard all of this, by the way, secondhand from Sarah. 0:10:26.036 --> 0:10:29.796 She didn't attend any of the oncology appointments. Since Sarah 0:10:29.876 --> 0:10:33.556 had been diagnosed during COVID, when patients were generally going 0:10:33.596 --> 0:10:37.676 to the hospital alone. Nicole says that Sarah tried to 0:10:37.756 --> 0:10:41.396 keep things upbeat. They nicknamed the tumor her brain buddy, 0:10:41.996 --> 0:10:45.436 and apparently the buddy didn't seem to be getting any bigger. 0:10:46.036 --> 0:10:48.996 So despite the bad news, they pressed ahead with their 0:10:49.036 --> 0:10:50.996 plans to have a baby. 0:10:51.116 --> 0:10:54.316 We were gonna like do in vitro fertilization and I 0:10:54.396 --> 0:10:56.276 was going to carry. I had been to the doctor 0:10:56.356 --> 0:11:00.196 several times, like I'd been through some procedures. They're checking out, 0:11:00.436 --> 0:11:03.636 you know, my system here to make sure that we 0:11:03.636 --> 0:11:08.796 were good to go. So I had a doctor's appointment 0:11:10.036 --> 0:11:11.276 that I was going to go to, which would have 0:11:11.316 --> 0:11:14.676 been the final like sign off before the actual event. 0:11:15.356 --> 0:11:19.436 So I remember the day before the appointment, she said, 0:11:20.716 --> 0:11:23.556 I think you should pause on the appointment because I 0:11:23.556 --> 0:11:25.276 have this doctor's appointment and I don't know if it's 0:11:25.316 --> 0:11:28.396 going to go well. And I was like, okay, what's 0:11:28.436 --> 0:11:31.116 going on. She made it sound like that we need 0:11:31.116 --> 0:11:32.996 to wait because this might be really serious. 0:11:34.396 --> 0:11:37.956 Soon after this, Sarah tells Nicole that the cancer has 0:11:37.996 --> 0:11:42.876 gotten much worse, possibly terminal, which changed everything. 0:11:44.516 --> 0:11:46.716 It flips into you know, you take care of your 0:11:46.756 --> 0:11:49.836 significant other, like now, I'm just like that's on pause 0:11:49.876 --> 0:11:52.596 and okay, we can pick that up later. What's going 0:11:52.636 --> 0:11:53.036 on with you? 0:11:54.196 --> 0:11:57.396 Their plans to expand their family were put on hold. 0:11:58.236 --> 0:12:01.756 Nicole pursued a promotion at work, thinking the extra money 0:12:01.796 --> 0:12:06.476 would help as the medical bills piled up. Meanwhile, Sarah 0:12:06.556 --> 0:12:10.796 arranged for in home support from a specialist trained to 0:12:10.836 --> 0:12:14.556 work with people with traumatic brain injuries, someone who came 0:12:14.636 --> 0:12:18.636 multiple times a week. What Nicole didn't know was that 0:12:18.676 --> 0:12:22.596 the Wounded Warrior Project was paying for this. I interviewed 0:12:22.596 --> 0:12:27.556 that person, the specialist she helped Sarah for years, thinking 0:12:27.636 --> 0:12:31.276 Sarah had a brain injury while also battling cancer. 0:12:32.876 --> 0:12:34.316 But even while taking. 0:12:34.036 --> 0:12:37.996 This help, she still kept her wife Nicole, at a distance. 0:12:39.156 --> 0:12:43.796 She didn't involve me, Like, she wouldn't involve me, She 0:12:43.836 --> 0:12:45.956 wouldn't lean on me. She was like, I do this 0:12:45.996 --> 0:12:47.756 on my own. I don't want you to worry about it. 0:12:48.196 --> 0:12:51.036 Anytime I tried to talk with her about it, She's 0:12:51.156 --> 0:12:53.316 just like, I can't, I don't want to talk about it. 0:12:53.596 --> 0:12:56.956 So it was very it was something that separated us. 0:12:56.996 --> 0:12:58.916 She didn't lean into me, she leaned away. 0:13:00.196 --> 0:13:03.956 When it came time for Sarah's doctor's appointments. Even after 0:13:04.076 --> 0:13:09.076 COVID restrictions were lifted, Sarah was explicit she didn't want 0:13:09.116 --> 0:13:13.076 I want Nicole to be there. Nicole says she was hurt, 0:13:13.516 --> 0:13:15.636 but she didn't really feel like she had the right 0:13:15.676 --> 0:13:17.036 to express her frustration. 0:13:18.876 --> 0:13:21.796 Are you gonna blame the spouse with cancer? Like, what 0:13:21.836 --> 0:13:25.436 do you you know is she's having a hard time 0:13:26.196 --> 0:13:31.196 coping with it and is choosing to withdraw, Then you 0:13:31.236 --> 0:13:34.676 know that's it's kind I chopped it up to that, like, 0:13:34.956 --> 0:13:37.476 when she's ready for me to support her, she'll allow 0:13:37.556 --> 0:13:39.236 me to support her, and I'm just going to keep 0:13:39.276 --> 0:13:43.276 being here until she's ready. That's how I rationalized it. 0:13:45.676 --> 0:13:49.156 What Nicole didn't know at the time was that, of course, 0:13:49.396 --> 0:13:52.756 Sarah was living a double life. When she traveled for 0:13:52.876 --> 0:13:57.276 veteran events, she was sometimes attending all expense paid retreats 0:13:57.596 --> 0:14:00.396 posing as a war hero. When she was out with 0:14:00.436 --> 0:14:03.316 her veteran buddies, she was playing the role of the 0:14:03.396 --> 0:14:07.076 VFW commander, And when she went away on her own 0:14:07.716 --> 0:14:11.876 sometimes she was actually with Sam, the physical therapist whom 0:14:11.956 --> 0:14:16.596 she'd become romantically involved with. The whole thing was bound 0:14:16.636 --> 0:14:38.916 to unravel and then one day it did. When Nicole 0:14:39.036 --> 0:14:42.716 got the call, the call that the FBI was at 0:14:42.716 --> 0:14:46.036 her house, she hopped in her car and rushed home. 0:14:47.156 --> 0:14:52.436 There was a ton of black SUVs and a ambulance 0:14:52.596 --> 0:14:57.676 and cop cars and all kinds of vehicles in the road, 0:14:57.756 --> 0:14:59.316 So I like park down the street. You have to 0:14:59.356 --> 0:15:01.876 do like a walk of shame to get to my house. 0:15:01.956 --> 0:15:03.956 Everybody's like looking, and I'm like, I don't know, guys, 0:15:03.996 --> 0:15:04.916 I don't know what's happening. 0:15:06.356 --> 0:15:10.156 Nicole arrived home to find an FBI agents her doorstep. 0:15:10.836 --> 0:15:14.316 The agent explained that Sarah had threatened to harm herself 0:15:14.716 --> 0:15:17.756 and needed to be taken to the hospital, but Sarah 0:15:17.796 --> 0:15:22.556 had refused to go without Nicole, so Nicole hopped back 0:15:22.596 --> 0:15:25.436 in her car and followed the ambulance to the hospital. 0:15:26.476 --> 0:15:29.356 It doesn't matter what else is happening in that moment. 0:15:29.476 --> 0:15:31.956 I don't really know, but I'll get the facts whatever. 0:15:31.996 --> 0:15:34.636 I'll get home later and we'll figure it out. You 0:15:34.756 --> 0:15:37.836 just go into like take care of your significant other mode. 0:15:38.356 --> 0:15:41.716 The most important thing is, like she's getting into an ambulance, 0:15:41.756 --> 0:15:42.356 I'm gonna go. 0:15:43.636 --> 0:15:47.036 After a long way to the hospital, they cleared Sarah, 0:15:47.436 --> 0:15:52.436 determining she wasn't an immediate danger to herself. Sarah was 0:15:52.476 --> 0:15:55.916 allowed to leave the coal and the two returned home 0:15:55.996 --> 0:15:57.836 together in Nicole's car. 0:15:59.436 --> 0:16:06.516 It was silent. It was just silent. I said, what's 0:16:06.556 --> 0:16:09.956 going on? It was quiet for a long time. I 0:16:10.076 --> 0:16:12.316 just waited for her to answer. I don't have answers. 0:16:12.396 --> 0:16:13.716 I'll wait until you answer. 0:16:14.796 --> 0:16:19.636 Eventually, Sarah vaguely admitted to lying about some things mentioned 0:16:19.716 --> 0:16:23.276 she might be in trouble. Understatement of the century. By 0:16:23.276 --> 0:16:25.676 the way Nicole's head was spinning. 0:16:27.396 --> 0:16:31.116 I'm trying to be gentle in the way of you 0:16:31.236 --> 0:16:33.996 have somebody who's struggling with some mental health stuff in 0:16:33.996 --> 0:16:37.876 this moment right now, but I also need to know 0:16:37.916 --> 0:16:40.436 what's going on, and I need her to talk to me. 0:16:40.756 --> 0:16:43.236 I said directly to her, do you have cancer? And 0:16:43.276 --> 0:16:51.676 she said yes, and I was like okay. 0:16:54.596 --> 0:16:58.516 When they arrived back home, the cop cars are all gone. 0:16:58.796 --> 0:17:02.196 The neighbors are back in their homes and their quiet 0:17:02.276 --> 0:17:06.316 New England Street is once again a quiet New England Street. 0:17:08.516 --> 0:17:11.636 We walk in the house is a disaster. The drawers 0:17:11.636 --> 0:17:14.636 are all pulled out and things are knocked over and 0:17:14.676 --> 0:17:17.356 things like that. They didn't break anything, but it's a mess, 0:17:17.996 --> 0:17:21.716 and we didn't keep our house messy. So it's like 0:17:22.076 --> 0:17:22.756 was startling. 0:17:24.036 --> 0:17:27.836 As they're picking up the mess, Nicole's mind keeps returning 0:17:27.876 --> 0:17:31.796 to the cancer because if there's one thing that she 0:17:31.996 --> 0:17:35.396 needs to be true, it's that It's why she took 0:17:35.436 --> 0:17:38.956 the promotion, worked the extra hours, built up their savings, 0:17:39.676 --> 0:17:42.476 and it was the cancer that in a way helped 0:17:42.516 --> 0:17:45.916 explain why Sarah had been struggling so much, why she'd 0:17:45.956 --> 0:17:49.756 been so distant, and most of all, it was the 0:17:49.796 --> 0:17:53.396 cancer that prompted them to postpone their plans to have kids. 0:17:54.036 --> 0:17:57.916 And so as they're cleaning up, she asks Sarah again 0:17:58.156 --> 0:18:03.916 about the cancer, and once more Sarah insists, yes, it's true. 0:18:05.236 --> 0:18:09.316 But Nicole, she can't let it go, this question. It 0:18:09.436 --> 0:18:11.156 plays on her exhausted mind. 0:18:12.236 --> 0:18:16.356 So then we laid down to sleep that night, and 0:18:18.196 --> 0:18:20.556 in the dark, laying laying in bed in the dark, 0:18:20.636 --> 0:18:23.636 kind of like pillow tongue, I asked her one more time, 0:18:24.076 --> 0:18:25.556 do you have cancer? 0:18:27.436 --> 0:18:32.796 And then she just waited, somehow sensing that maybe under 0:18:32.836 --> 0:18:38.996 the cover of darkness the truth might finally emerge. 0:18:44.196 --> 0:18:47.676 One of the many questions that we had was how 0:18:47.716 --> 0:18:51.116 did Sarah get to this moment? Lying in her bed 0:18:51.676 --> 0:18:55.556 in the dark, next to her spouse, being asked this 0:18:55.796 --> 0:19:00.916 terrifyingly simple question, have you been lying to me about 0:19:00.916 --> 0:19:05.476 having cancer? In order to understand how she got here 0:19:06.076 --> 0:19:09.756 to this moment, we actually have to go back too 0:19:09.836 --> 0:19:13.676 much earlier in Sarah's story, because the way Sarah sees it, 0:19:14.316 --> 0:19:18.036 her double life wasn't initially Sarah the social worker and 0:19:18.076 --> 0:19:22.676 Sarah the war hero. Her first double life began as 0:19:22.676 --> 0:19:23.316 a little girl. 0:19:24.436 --> 0:19:27.316 I think this feeling of like always wanting a different 0:19:27.356 --> 0:19:30.276 life had been really persistent for me for some time, 0:19:30.556 --> 0:19:32.836 or for most of my life. 0:19:33.076 --> 0:19:36.996 Sarah admits she lied a lot growing up about all 0:19:37.076 --> 0:19:40.676 kinds of things. At first, some of the lies we 0:19:40.716 --> 0:19:43.676 heard about seemed to us like they'd fall in the 0:19:43.716 --> 0:19:47.276 category of just stuff that kids do. She'd tell her 0:19:47.276 --> 0:19:50.516 parents she was at school when she wasn't. Sometimes she'd 0:19:50.516 --> 0:19:53.916 lie to other kids. We spoke to her best friend. 0:19:54.276 --> 0:19:57.836 Her name is Ariel. They met as teenagers and the 0:19:57.876 --> 0:20:01.476 two of them remain very close. Ariel gave us a 0:20:01.516 --> 0:20:06.116 window into Sarah's world back in high school. Ariol remembers 0:20:06.156 --> 0:20:10.116 Sarah spinning wise, that didn't even it really makes sense, 0:20:10.836 --> 0:20:13.436 Like when Sarah would tell people that she was adopted. 0:20:13.996 --> 0:20:17.236 According to Ariel, Sarah's mom called her out on this, 0:20:17.556 --> 0:20:21.916 saying stop it, You're not adopted, but Sarah would keep 0:20:21.916 --> 0:20:26.036 on saying it. Ariel always found this strange and never 0:20:26.076 --> 0:20:27.876 quite understood why Sarah did it. 0:20:28.836 --> 0:20:32.716 But as we dug deeper into Sarah's story, we uncovered 0:20:32.796 --> 0:20:36.156 another set of lies that she told as a teenager 0:20:36.796 --> 0:20:43.756 that did seem out of the ordinary. We tracked down 0:20:43.796 --> 0:20:46.956 a few other people who knew Sarah back then. They 0:20:46.996 --> 0:20:50.676 told us that they knew Sarah not as a new Englander, 0:20:51.316 --> 0:20:55.076 but as a Southern girl, and more specifically as a 0:20:55.156 --> 0:21:00.036 victim of Hurricane Katrina. This was just after that hurricane, 0:21:00.236 --> 0:21:04.156 so it was still really fresh in people's minds. Sympathy 0:21:04.196 --> 0:21:09.676 for Katrina victims was running high. Our sources said that 0:21:09.716 --> 0:21:14.196 Sarah talked in detail about the ordeal of surviving Katrina. 0:21:15.036 --> 0:21:17.876 Told people she was rescued from the roof of her 0:21:17.916 --> 0:21:23.716 house just barely made it out alive. Apparently, Sarah told 0:21:23.756 --> 0:21:28.076 some people that her father died during the flooding. These 0:21:28.116 --> 0:21:35.036 lies earned her sympathy and friendship. To me, it seems 0:21:35.076 --> 0:21:38.556 like a test run of what she'd do with veterans, 0:21:39.076 --> 0:21:41.356 and that happened ten years prior. 0:21:42.996 --> 0:21:43.916 I asked Sarah. 0:21:43.636 --> 0:21:46.436 About all this, by the way, and she denied it. 0:21:46.996 --> 0:21:50.836 Told me I never told people that. I don't know 0:21:50.916 --> 0:21:51.716 why they think that. 0:21:57.236 --> 0:22:00.036 Sarah told us that things happened to her as a 0:22:00.116 --> 0:22:03.356 child that made her want to live a different life, 0:22:03.756 --> 0:22:08.596 be someone else, lie escape. 0:22:08.756 --> 0:22:12.556 When you lived two separate lives for so long, it 0:22:12.596 --> 0:22:15.476 feels normal, right. I had to be someone else in 0:22:15.476 --> 0:22:17.436 front of other people when I was a child, and 0:22:18.556 --> 0:22:19.236 that was normal. 0:22:20.316 --> 0:22:23.156 Sarah says that there was a man who sexually abused 0:22:23.156 --> 0:22:26.956 her for years when she was a girl. Her mother 0:22:27.076 --> 0:22:32.076 attested to this in official documents. Nicole also confirmed us 0:22:32.236 --> 0:22:35.756 that this abuse was something that Sarah had shared with her. 0:22:36.476 --> 0:22:40.516 According to Sarah, this abuse kind of split her life 0:22:40.556 --> 0:22:40.916 in two. 0:22:42.036 --> 0:22:43.796 When I go to school, I'm able to just like 0:22:44.116 --> 0:22:47.556 excel and act like everything is fine, and play a 0:22:47.596 --> 0:22:49.876 sport and play an instrument and do all of these things. 0:22:49.916 --> 0:22:53.836 And no one knew anything was going on for a 0:22:53.996 --> 0:22:54.836 very long time. 0:22:56.596 --> 0:22:59.636 That included her high school friend Ariel, who he told 0:22:59.676 --> 0:23:03.076 you about. Ariel says she had no idea that Sarah 0:23:03.156 --> 0:23:08.236 had been sexually abused. To Ariel, Sarah came across as 0:23:08.316 --> 0:23:12.876 funny and friendly, always up for an adventure. She played 0:23:12.876 --> 0:23:16.116 on the high school's basketball team. She was openly gay, 0:23:16.756 --> 0:23:19.596 and she even helped Ariol come out of the closet herself. 0:23:20.596 --> 0:23:25.196 She seemed so confident, but Sarah says the truth is 0:23:26.116 --> 0:23:27.116 she was unraveling. 0:23:28.316 --> 0:23:30.436 It began to drink really young. I was like thirteen 0:23:30.476 --> 0:23:37.076 when I started drinking. I definitely overused alcohol right and 0:23:38.636 --> 0:23:42.276 when I started to get into therapy finally, when I 0:23:42.316 --> 0:23:48.156 was like fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, my symptoms were really really 0:23:49.116 --> 0:23:51.836 like I could barely get through school certain days, or. 0:23:53.236 --> 0:23:54.036 I would just leave. 0:23:55.436 --> 0:23:58.756 At first, things seemed to get somewhat better. When Sarah 0:23:58.756 --> 0:24:01.796 got to college. She was stable enough that she was 0:24:01.836 --> 0:24:05.596 able to help others. Her best friend Ariol had ended 0:24:05.676 --> 0:24:09.596 up homeless, and Sarah was the one to say, come 0:24:09.676 --> 0:24:12.876 live with me. She even let Ariol sleep on her 0:24:12.876 --> 0:24:17.196 couch for a whole year. To this day, Ariel is 0:24:17.356 --> 0:24:23.356 deeply grateful and loyal to Sarah, and sure Sarah was 0:24:23.396 --> 0:24:27.556 still drinking a lot, but wasn't everyone In college, I. 0:24:27.516 --> 0:24:29.236 Thought I pretty much had an under control where I 0:24:29.276 --> 0:24:32.156 was going to school, I had an apartment. Things felt okay, 0:24:32.556 --> 0:24:32.876 so to. 0:24:32.876 --> 0:24:37.556 Speak, but then in her senior year of undergrad her 0:24:37.556 --> 0:24:38.716 mental health took a turn. 0:24:39.756 --> 0:24:45.316 I was hospitalized for a suicide attempt and then I 0:24:45.356 --> 0:24:47.756 was referred to like this outpatient program at one of 0:24:47.756 --> 0:24:48.676 the local hospitals. 0:24:50.076 --> 0:24:54.236 Sarah started taking medications for her anxiety after this, and 0:24:54.316 --> 0:24:58.076 she says she really evened doubt. But then her insurance 0:24:58.116 --> 0:25:01.876 stopped covering her medical provider, so she went off her meds. 0:25:02.676 --> 0:25:05.196 It was a rough time. She says that she tried 0:25:05.236 --> 0:25:09.396 to take her own life on multiple occasions. All of 0:25:09.436 --> 0:25:12.876 this is to say, Sarah told us she faced some 0:25:12.916 --> 0:25:16.156 pretty difficult moments in her life from a young age. 0:25:17.916 --> 0:25:22.356 Then in twenty sixteen, when Sarah was twenty five, two 0:25:22.396 --> 0:25:27.876 things happened, two really important things. The first was that 0:25:27.916 --> 0:25:32.836 she met Nicole, who would eventually become her wife. The 0:25:32.916 --> 0:25:37.516 second was that in this same year, she joined the VFW, 0:25:38.316 --> 0:25:40.636 where she found a community of veterans. 0:25:42.516 --> 0:25:45.876 These two things, her wife and her veteran buddies would 0:25:45.916 --> 0:25:50.836 become Sarah's pillars, her support, but they were also destined 0:25:50.836 --> 0:25:54.356 to push against one another and create tension in a 0:25:54.396 --> 0:25:58.036 way that would ultimately bring everything crashing down. 0:26:00.516 --> 0:26:04.356 The community that Sarah found at the VFW seemed to 0:26:04.356 --> 0:26:08.676 be so meaningful to her. She says everyone there seemed 0:26:08.716 --> 0:26:12.396 to get that she was working through a trauma from her. 0:26:12.276 --> 0:26:15.996 Past, like you don't have to hide like that you're 0:26:16.076 --> 0:26:20.036 uncomfortable or that like people talking loudly or yelling makes 0:26:20.076 --> 0:26:22.436 you feel like triggering, Like you don't have to hide 0:26:22.436 --> 0:26:24.996 those things. Those are like socially acceptable for veterans. And 0:26:25.156 --> 0:26:26.996 like I remember being out of work thing once in 0:26:27.156 --> 0:26:29.956 like a colleague, like a male colleague, like coming in 0:26:29.996 --> 0:26:31.676 for a hug and being like, oh my gosh, and 0:26:31.756 --> 0:26:36.316 like awkwardly like turning and like my somebody I worked 0:26:36.316 --> 0:26:37.916 with at the time, like being like are you okay 0:26:38.116 --> 0:26:41.076